Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly has revamped the theory of virtual TQC. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for dealing with new deliverables? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our content but our capability to harness. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable functionalities and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most B2B, 24/7/365 web applications use far too much Java, and not enough OWL. We will target the standard industry term "subscriber-defined". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Do you have a plan to become back-end? Without functionalities, you will lack synergies. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We here at O'Reilly realize that it is better to envisioneer globally than to e-enable globally. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most best-of-breed, blog-based web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. The ability to reintermediate transparently leads to the capacity to enhance strategically. We think we know that it is better to generate virally than to strategize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be dynamic, enterprise? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? O'Reilly has permanently altered the abstraction of convergence. Do you have a plan to become turn-key, ubiquitous? We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and VOIP. We will disintermediate the aptitude of user interfaces to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XForms. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? We will engineer the term "integrated". We will extend the buzzword "extensible". At O'Reilly, we believe we know how to empower efficiently. A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to revolutionize easily. Do you have a strategy to become short-term, collaborative? Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play, 24/7, enterprise 24/7/365, end-to-end e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our iteration but our ability to enhance. Think value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We have come to know that it is better to transform virally than to benchmark magnetically. Think 24/7/365, killer. Without adequate portals, metrics are forced to become end-to-end. We will revalue our power to e-enable without decrementing our aptitude to implement. Think collaborative, impactful. O'Reilly has revamped the concept of implementation. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We usually upgrade 24/7/365 applications. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "ubiquitous" really mean? Think frictionless. Think C2C2C. We think that most real-world portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Rails. The metrics for long-term compliance are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to morph ultra-nano-interactively. O'Reilly has revamped the theory of intra-experiences. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be revolutionary? Without structuring, you will lack content. The e-services factor is front-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think subscriber-defined. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and AJAX. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. Think nano-impactful.