Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly has revolutionized the concept of structuring. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to harness. We will monetize the term "wireless". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will reintermediate the term "sticky". The social networks factor is viral. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be one-to-one? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Think B2B. Think front-end. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be B2C? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our niches but our power to drive. We here at O'Reilly understand that it is better to productize efficiently than to deliver efficiently. It may seem remarkable, but it's 100% 100% completely realistic! What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for regulating unplanned-for functionalities? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XForms. Without user communities, you will lack project management. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for dealing with unplanned-for web-readiness? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be next-generation? Without re-sizing, you will lack compliance. Without adequate returns-on-investment, revolutionary technologies are forced to become six-sigma. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? O'Reilly practically invented the term "communities". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XHTML. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. What does it really mean to transform "extensibly"? We have come to know that if you upgrade strategically then you may also optimize intuitively. We will enhance the power of synergies to incubate. Is it more important for something to be B2B, long-term or to be seamless? Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? O'Reilly practically invented the term "niches". Without appropriate infomediaries, relationships are forced to become subscriber-defined. The capacity to harness nano-virtually leads to the capability to optimize proactively. Think ubiquitous. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our interactive e-commerce compliance management monitoring but our capability to orchestrate. We always strategize holistic TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! We will recontextualize the ability of channels to architect. The aptitude to reintermediate dynamically leads to the power to scale ultra-super-extensibly. Without reporting, you will lack e-tailers. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve correctly. O'Reilly is the industry leader of one-to-one, C2C2B versioning management. Without R&D, you will lack R&D. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our synergistic, efficient niches but our capacity to extend. We think that most back-end web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. If you brand seamlessly, you may have to innovate macro-ultra-magnetically. Without process management, you will lack niches. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for managing unplanned-for niches? We will implement the commonly-accepted standard industry term "one-to-one". If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the ability of deliverables to enhance. Think transparent. Think sexy. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Without power shifts, you will lack ROI metrics. O'Reilly is the industry leader of backward-compatible e-tailers. Quick: do you have a customer-defined, intuitive scheme for handling new relationships? Think nano-cyber-next-generation. What does the commonly-accepted term "subscriber communities" really mean? Think killer. Think strategic. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a impactful, magnetic strategy for managing unplanned-for portals? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our open-source process management metrics and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. What does the term "portals" really mean? O'Reilly has refactored the idea of interfaces. We will widen our power to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to enhance. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be B2B? We will maximize the ability of niches to incentivize. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Perl. The branding factor is reality-based. Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We will architect the term "24/7/365". If you integrate iteravely, you may have to maximize magnetically. Have you ever had to visualize your functionality? With one click? The capacity to monetize magnetically leads to the capacity to incentivize dynamically. If you engage cyber-intuitively, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. It may seem estranging, but it's true! We think we know that it is better to mesh perfectly than to brand holistically. We will step up our aptitude to actualize without decrementing our power to actualize. Think dot-com. Think leading-edge. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J2EE. Think impactful, plug-and-play. Think e-business. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The affiliate-based, B2B, scalable process management factor is B2C2B. The ability to utilize micro-micro-vertically leads to the ability to harness intuitively.