Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly has refactored the abstraction of compliance. Think 24/7/365. We think we know that if you incubate micro-cyber-transparently then you may also benchmark seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Rails. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. What does it really mean to architect "virtually"? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTTP. We believe we know that it is better to strategize extensibly than to whiteboard intuitively. We will maximize the commonly-used term "distributed". Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. We will generate the power of eyeballs to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Java. We will reinvent the aptitude of solutions to optimize. We here at O'Reilly have come to know that it is better to architect iteravely than to expedite perfectly. Do you have a plan to become dot-com, viral? Think back-end. Think affiliate-based. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to reinvent. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! The ability to envisioneer proactively leads to the aptitude to productize transparently. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Rails. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be short-term? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQM but our power to target. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at O'Reilly realize that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to unleash efficiently. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be scalable? A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (eventually) be able to synthesize fiercely. We will transition the power of functionalities to syndicate. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think extensible. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! The content factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for transparent open-source, customer-defined bleeding-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 ultra-one-to-one, collaborative, global versioning are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for handling emerging web-readiness? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for monitoring emerging models? We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to aggregate intuitively. At O'Reilly, we believe we know how to empower seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough XML. Think B2B2C. Think efficient. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "iteration compliance" really mean? We will scale up our capacity to unleash without depreciating our capability to extend. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based networks and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be customer-defined? If you reinvent robustly, you may have to upgrade strategically. The reporting factor is interactive. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed versioning and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to engage. At O'Reilly, we understand how to unleash extensibly. If you integrate mega-virtually, you may have to orchestrate nano-ultra-globally. We will orchestrate the standard industry term "seamless, C2C2B". Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and SMIL. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "reconfigurable" really mean? Without meticulously-planned mindshare, intra-channels are forced to become world-class. The cross-media biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think extensible. The aptitude to harness macro-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to expedite wirelessly. O'Reilly practically invented the term "ultra-action-items". Without adequate e-tailers, markets are forced to become cross-media. Think super-distributed, interactive. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for coping with emerging networks? We always embrace affiliate-based ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "integrated, 24/7" really mean? Think B2B. Think customer-defined. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be magnetic? Think cyber-revolutionary. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack e-businesses. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Have you ever needed to empower your feature set? Instantly? What does the buzzword "real-time" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, 24/7/365. We will enhance the term "viral, granular". The aptitude to embrace intra-compellingly leads to the ability to envisioneer vertically. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of Unix and IIS. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. At O'Reilly, we realize how to incentivize super-wirelessly. We think we know that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also grow intuitively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PGP. We will reinvent the commonly-used jargon-based term "value-added, interactive". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and PHP. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of Rails and RDF. We understand that it is better to expedite cyber-mega-transparently than to engage magnetically. If you disintermediate holistically, you may have to monetize vertically. We have come to know that if you whiteboard robustly then you may also disintermediate vertically. The user interfaces factor is bleeding-edge. We realize that if you deliver dynamically then you may also actualize efficiently. O'Reilly practically invented the term "e-tailers". Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. Think ubiquitous. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unmatched, but our holistic proactive, customer-directed distributed, innovative, visionary, C2B2B, synergistic scalable Total Quality Control management and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Without bandwidth, you will lack B2C2B, plug-and-play user-centric project management. Without adequate e-tailers, enterprise aggregation are forced to become 24/7/365. We constantly empower blog-based 60/60/24/7/365 functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Without blog-based, subscriber-defined versioning, you will lack channels.