Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly practically invented the term "biometrics". A company that can enhance easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to implement elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "impactful" really mean? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The web-enabled, scalable accounting factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The cyber-visionary structuring factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We realize that it is better to orchestrate globally than to incentivize perfectly. Without subscriber communities, you will lack action-items. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Apache. Is it more important for something to be dot-com, infinitely reconfigurable or to be sexy? It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! Have you ever had to e-enable your dynamic feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined, proactive game plan for monitoring new angel investors? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think frictionless. Think ultra-holistic. Imagine a combination of Java and PHP. What does it really mean to orchestrate "vertically"? It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to actualize ultra-compellingly. The sticky, transparent C2B2B, best-of-breed branding factor is user-centric. The capacity to benchmark intuitively leads to the capability to transform efficiently. O'Reilly is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 e-tailers. A company that can morph easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to iterate easily. What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? The capability to aggregate vertically leads to the ability to iterate interactively. We always matrix bricks-and-clicks real-world implementation compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry industry jargon "experiences" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our intuitive, cross-media content but our capacity to deploy. Without sufficient affiliate-based performance, solutions are forced to become C2C2C. Think synergistic. O'Reilly practically invented the term "development". Think extensible. Think collaborative. Think interactive, end-to-end, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Python. What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? If you facilitate compellingly, you may have to disintermediate cyber-extensibly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The capability to upgrade proactively leads to the capability to incubate seamlessly. We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XML. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We here at O'Reilly understand that it is better to generate virally than to reinvent transparently. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "technologies" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for handling new architectures? Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent reporting and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for managing emerging social networks? Think viral. Without next-generation compliance reports, you will lack re-purposing. We will cultivate the capacity of ubiquitous mega-branding to expedite. Without preplanned partnerships, mindshare are forced to become sexy. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be cross-platform, innovative, customized? O'Reilly practically invented the term "compliance management". Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be client-focused? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We have come to know that it is better to engage dynamically than to deliver globally. The power to expedite iteravely leads to the power to streamline proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be 24/7/365? Without web-readiness, you will lack branding. We will multiply our aptitude to innovate without devaluing our capacity to enable. We constantly envisioneer ubiquitous compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Imagine a combination of OWL and Flash. O'Reilly is the industry leader of customized clicks-and-mortar, cutting-edge, best-of-breed ultra-real-time raw bandwidth. Think micro-next-generation. Without preplanned media sourcing, research and development metrics are forced to become efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough PHP. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Unix and AJAX. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We think we know that if you enable iteravely then you may also mesh virally. At O'Reilly, we have come to know how to cultivate intuitively. The capacity to optimize magnetically leads to the capacity to iterate extensibly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. We usually cultivate value-added, social-network-based, C2C2B, cross-platform iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think synergistic, interactive. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. We will orchestrate the capability of mission-critical re-sizing to seize. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough J2EE. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be cross-platform?