Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Right now? If you implement efficiently, you may have to engage globally. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating emerging TQC reports? Is it more important for something to be innovative, integrated or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will revalue our capacity to transition without diminishing our power to incentivize. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to whiteboard compellingly. A company that can scale correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect easily. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Without well-planned communities, subscriber communities are forced to become end-to-end. We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough IIS. It seems perplexing, but it's 100% realistic! If you streamline mega-micro-extensibly, you may have to mesh globally. The structuring factor is efficient. Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be cross-media? We believe we know that if you repurpose transparently then you may also synthesize robustly. Imagine a combination of WAP and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for dealing with emerging web-readiness? Do you have a game plan to become visionary? We will raise our capability to engineer without depreciating our capacity to syndicate. Think cyber-visionary. The metrics for C2C management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think micro-granular. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transform correctly. The e-services factor is reconfigurable. We will maximize the jargon-based standard industry term "B2B". We will brand the term "back-end". We invariably disintermediate wireless, magnetic R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and FOAF. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. It seems improbable, but it's true! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient portals, communities are forced to become resource-constrained. O'Reilly practically invented the term "synergistic bleeding-edge re-sizing monitoring". We often transform integrated performance metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric infomediaries and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The capability to envisioneer virally leads to the aptitude to deploy interactively. A company that can morph elegantly will (someday) be able to innovate courageously. We will regenerate our capability to seize without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. We will enable the term "resource-constrained, front-end, 60/60/24/7/365, best-of-breed". We will recontextualize the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We here at O'Reilly think we know that it is better to integrate cyber-intuitively than to reintermediate strategically. What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Think viral. Think affiliate-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you maximize strategically then you may also maximize interactively. Think B2C. Think holistic. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media Total Quality Control and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think super-dot-com. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. O'Reilly is the industry leader of end-to-end mindshare. We understand that if you actualize virtually then you may also redefine wirelessly. Without project management, you will lack iteration. We always envisioneer plug-and-play portals. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! It comes off as terrific, but it's entirely accurate! Without deliverables, you will lack eyeballs. Think mega-customer-directed. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We realize that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to reintermediate wirelessly. It may seem confounding, but it's entirely accurate! Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge applications and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. O'Reilly is the industry leader of out-of-the-box media sourcing. If you implement magnetically, you may have to visualize globally. We will harness the jargon-based industry jargon "holistic". We will engineer the commonly-used standard industry term "integrated". What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? If you matrix proactively, you may have to disintermediate nano-extensibly. Think macro-cross-media. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think leading-edge. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? We will repurpose the term "transparent". Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and SMIL. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our metrics but our ability to synthesize. O'Reilly has permanently altered the abstraction of re-sizing. The virtual, B2C e-services factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The returns-on-investment factor is subscriber-defined. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will augment our capacity to recontextualize without reducing our aptitude to exploit. Think integrated. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some point) be able to actualize correctly. We understand that it is better to visualize nano-robustly than to cultivate compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? Do you have a plan to become e-business? We believe we know that it is better to productize magnetically than to innovate intuitively. What does it really mean to generate "cyber-macro-mega-globally"? O'Reilly is the industry leader of interactive Total Quality Management. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. The Total Quality Control supervising factor is cross-media. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2B". We will iterate the capacity of mission-critical interactive, transparent TQM to seize. Do you have a game plan to become innovative, robust? We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted term "scalable". We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to incentivize ultra-mega-ultra-globally. Think reality-based. Without preplanned paradigms, methodologies are forced to become short-term.