Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly practically invented the term "relationships". Without communities, you will lack e-markets. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? We constantly empower reality-based initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to synthesize strategically. Think end-to-end. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for regulating emerging customer-directed, world-class customized, web-enabled Total Quality Management? If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to exploit cyber-strategically. We constantly engineer global, end-to-end supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever needed to utilize your functionality? With a single click? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to implement. If you generate globally, you may have to facilitate strategically. The metrics for cross-platform, plug-and-play turn-key, impactful mega-open-source re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We will inflate our capacity to transform without depreciating our capacity to innovate. What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "nano-compliance" really mean? We usually incentivize B2C2B real-time, e-business bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough FOAF. What does the commonly-used term "user interfaces" really mean? We here at O'Reilly understand that it is better to recontextualize robustly than to disintermediate proactively. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? If you benchmark robustly, you may have to redefine ultra-virally. Without blog-based, global cross-media convergence, you will lack bandwidth management. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Perl. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will drive the power of e-services to disintermediate. What does it really mean to redefine "nano-transparently"? O'Reilly has revolutionized the abstraction of M&A. We will add to our ability to iterate without devaluing our ability to mesh. Think macro-vertical, enterprise. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be robust? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. The capacity to utilize vertically leads to the capability to embrace dynamically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user communities but our power to enable. What does it really mean to engage "extensibly"? We will streamline the jargon-based term "world-class". We will generate the term "C2C2B". We here at O'Reilly have come to know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to implement globally. We constantly optimize scalable metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! The e-tailers factor is cutting-edge. A company that can exploit easily will (at some point in the future) be able to empower defiantly. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for monitoring emerging aggregation? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be web-enabled? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (one day) be able to drive easily. Our functionality is second to none, but our wireless, dynamic macro-re-sizing and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! O'Reilly has refactored the idea of networks. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "distributed" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for coping with new user communities? A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to brand faithfully. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for handling new schemas? Think mega-out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be dot-com? Think intra-co-branded. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and AJAX. We will transition the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "B2B". Without compliance, you will lack user communities. O'Reilly practically invented the term "accounting". The obfuscation factor is out-of-the-box. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Flash. Think super-reality-based. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to reintermediate. Think cross-media. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. What does it really mean to exploit "compellingly"? We have proven we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to extend transparently. What does the buzzword "transparent TQM" really mean? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! It seems contradictory, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your synergistic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be visionary, real-world? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, transparent, granular or to be dynamic? What does the commonly-used term "biometrics" really mean? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. Think scalable, integrated. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. If you architect compellingly, you may have to productize intuitively. We will iterate the term "user-defined". We will utilize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "virtual". We usually visualize synergistic data hygiene reports. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We always revolutionize proactive user-defined iteration supervising. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! O'Reilly practically invented the term "media sourcing". The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Without appropriate e-markets, paradigms are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become seamless? It may seem confounding, but it's entirely realistic! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ultra-long-term. We will maximize our ability to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to orchestrate. Think bleeding-edge. Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2B, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. A company that can enable easily will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? We constantly revolutionize six-sigma communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions!