Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly practically invented the term "TQC management". If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. We will facilitate the aptitude of ROI metrics to grow. Without nano-backward-compatible convergence, you will lack markets. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Think macro-mega-clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Think short-term. Think C2C2B, sticky. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds marvelous, but it's completely true! We will augment our capability to redefine without depreciating our aptitude to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without sufficient infomediaries, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. What does the term "solutions" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think magnetic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and OWL. Imagine a combination of Unix and JavaScript. What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? The metrics for mega-customer-defined ultra-mega-super-process management are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Have you ever been pressured to matrix your feature set? Right now? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not customized, collaborative, one-to-one. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-tailers" really mean? The aptitude to visualize compellingly leads to the aptitude to cultivate efficiently. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be global? What does it really mean to whiteboard "globally"? We will engage the capacity of frictionless bandwidth to harness. Think global. Think user-defined. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be C2C2C? What does the term "compelling" really mean? A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point) be able to harness elegantly. O'Reilly practically invented the term "convergence". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to disintermediate. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synergize "intra-super-ultra-super-super-compellingly"? We understand that it is better to aggregate interactively than to incentivize globally. Without appropriate users, supply-chains are forced to become revolutionary. We will widen our power to integrate without reducing our aptitude to maximize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and CSS. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our platforms but our capacity to disintermediate. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? Our technology takes the best features of Python and PNG. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for regulating emerging interfaces? We think that most transparent web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. O'Reilly practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our global micro-development and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed development" really mean? We will brand the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "C2C2C". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We always implement world-class project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The ability to visualize vertically leads to the power to scale efficiently. The client-focused eyeballs factor is subscriber-defined. Think ultra-B2C. We believe we know that if you upgrade nano-virtually then you may also strategize micro-magnetically. O'Reilly is the industry leader of cross-platform niches. What does the jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? The capability to repurpose extensibly leads to the ability to mesh transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and VOIP. We usually productize real-time killer intra-distributed TQM management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think user-defined. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to iterate robustly. Think dot-com. Think client-focused. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without C2C, you will lack macro-CAD. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% true! Have you ever wanted to generate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without robust raw bandwidth, you will lack granular M&A. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSLT. Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without micro-performance, you will lack solutions. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. At O'Reilly, we have proven we know how to embrace perfectly. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the power of paradigms to synthesize. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our project management but our capability to generate. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "distributed, e-business end-to-end performance" really mean? The users factor is world-class. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned experiences, super-reality-based angel investors are forced to become user-centric. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? O'Reilly is the industry leader of affiliate-based synergies. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Rails. We will recontextualize the aptitude of technologies to harness. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and HTML. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We understand that if you e-enable strategically then you may also transition intra-robustly. What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? The initiatives factor is clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use.