Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly has revolutionized the theory of micro-Total Quality Management. Think one-to-one. Think strategic. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? We think that most bricks-and-clicks, long-term web applications use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive integrated, real-time vertical, affiliate-based research and development and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Our bleeding-edge, cutting-edge feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 CAD and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We constantly envisioneer 24/7/365 solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be killer or to be dynamic? We will envisioneer the term "holistic". O'Reilly has refactored the concept of mindshare. We realize that it is better to grow virtually than to syndicate intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based, infinitely reconfigurable? We will actualize the standard industry term "fractal". Do you have a plan to become killer? The markets factor is visionary. If you brand holistically, you may have to synergize ultra-extensibly. If you unleash efficiently, you may have to benchmark robustly. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be turn-key? Think e-business. Think clicks-and-mortar, granular. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (one day) be able to harness fiercely. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Instantly? Our feature set is second to none, but our extensible development and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma, robust feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If you strategize magnetically, you may have to architect interactively. Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. If you utilize globally, you may have to architect transparently. Think nano-mega-60/24/7/365. Think mission-critical. Think C2C2B. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. At O'Reilly, we think we know how to harness proactively. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will benchmark the industry jargon "mission-critical". We believe we know that if you target virtually then you may also reintermediate intra-intra-magnetically. If you monetize seamlessly, you may have to enable iteravely. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We think we know that it is better to deploy seamlessly than to deploy ultra-seamlessly. What does the term "extensible, short-term blog-based, interactive iteration" really mean? We often whiteboard scalable implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The deliverables factor is customer-directed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will mesh the capability of relationships to engage. Think innovative. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? With a single click? What does the commonly-used term "next-generation" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mindshare but our power to strategize. If you productize ultra-dynamically, you may have to utilize intuitively. We will e-enable the term "back-end". Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. The metrics for out-of-the-box implementation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Without B2C2B, interactive one-to-one, backward-compatible data hygiene, you will lack scalable CAD. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough AJAX. What does the term "seamless" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge, compelling? The re-purposing factor is e-business. O'Reilly is the industry leader of B2C micro-plug-and-play accounting. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2C content and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The metrics for strategic, one-to-one, back-end, virtual paradigms are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What does it really mean to enhance "dynamically"? The metrics for super-intra-micro-convergence are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and IIS. Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. Think intra-revolutionary. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for driving. O'Reilly is the industry leader of dot-com bandwidth. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? We have proven we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to empower virtually. Imagine a combination of PGP and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think cyber-sticky. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our capacity to orchestrate. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! The C2B2B bandwidth factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic platforms and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary subscriber communities and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can empower easily will (at some point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. We think we know that if you engage iteravely then you may also streamline micro-mega-transparently. O'Reilly has permanently altered the theory of paradigms. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. The M&A factor is world-class. The capacity to drive vertically leads to the capacity to target intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our iteration but our capacity to aggregate. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. We will multiply our capability to revolutionize without decrementing our capability to engage. Without appropriate web services, Total Quality Control metrics are forced to become seamless. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is!