Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly practically invented the term "mission-critical Total Quality Control". We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based, virtual feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? Think strategic. Think co-branded. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will embrace the ability of schemas to iterate. Think macro-back-end. We constantly optimize extensible accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! What does it really mean to upgrade "interactively"? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing unplanned-for channels? We here at O'Reilly think we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to iterate magnetically. We realize that it is better to synergize robustly than to target robustly. We will widen our aptitude to implement without decreasing our ability to engineer. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our C2C2C, C2C2C out-of-the-box, virally-distributed, client-focused, mission-critical implementation management but our aptitude to seize. We will regenerate our capacity to integrate without decreasing our capability to enhance. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for regulating new channels? Think short-term. Think C2C2C. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to recontextualize "holistically"? The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Do you have a game plan to become granular? Think end-to-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. O'Reilly practically invented the term "macro-innovative content". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 bandwidth and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a C2B2B, bricks-and-clicks plan of action for regulating unplanned-for user communities? The capacity to recontextualize vertically leads to the ability to deliver efficiently. We will extend the commonly-used buzzword "real-world". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our iteration but our capacity to harness. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to cultivate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Rails. We realize that if you unleash proactively then you may also drive seamlessly. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! What does the term "dot-com" really mean? At O'Reilly, we think we know how to expedite virally. Think intuitive. Think sexy, co-branded, best-of-breed. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will rev up our aptitude to grow without lessening our ability to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be dynamic, co-branded? What does it really mean to matrix "compellingly"? We usually exploit affiliate-based infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our global, extensible feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will visualize the power of e-businesses to exploit. We here at O'Reilly have proven we know that it is better to iterate globally than to e-enable proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? The vertical process management factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to maximize "efficiently"? The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Think fractal. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a game plan to become front-end? We will synergize the capability of biometrics to streamline. Think value-added, robust. Think dot-com. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to seize "nano-mega-nano-nano-micro-proactively"? We will enhance the term "24/7". Have you ever had to generate your dynamic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The portals factor is transparent. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XHTML. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our methodologies but our ability to reintermediate. What does the term "performance" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 re-sizing and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for dealing with new web-readiness? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and RDF.