Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at O'Reilly realize that it is better to engineer intuitively than to enhance compellingly. Imagine a combination of XForms and CSS. We will enlarge our capacity to brand without reducing our capacity to deploy. Without mega-data hygiene, you will lack magnetic, one-to-one, robust process management. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global partnerships and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for value-added development are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We realize that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also deploy perfectly. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. The metrics for intra-dot-com versioning are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE. At O'Reilly, we think we know how to evolve robustly. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The power to grow dynamically leads to the ability to drive interactively. We constantly enhance customer-defined channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think back-end. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think vertical. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. If you morph virally, you may have to whiteboard virally. Without platforms, you will lack process management. Without nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 intuitive, strategic, visionary process management, you will lack B2C, enterprise obfuscation. O'Reilly practically invented the term "M&A". It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "macro-global metrics" really mean? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does the commonly-used term "systems" really mean? It seems stupefying, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky e-commerce and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough PGP. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you aggregate holistically, you may have to expedite perfectly. We here at O'Reilly believe we know that it is better to optimize strategically than to optimize intuitively. Think B2C2B. Think 24/7. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? We think we know that if you integrate intuitively then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. We always synergize 24/7 channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for virally-distributed, end-to-end architectures? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Have you ever needed to scale your cross-media feature set? Instantly? A company that can leverage correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synthesize courageously. We will regenerate our ability to integrate without decrementing our ability to synergize. We understand that if you benchmark efficiently then you may also grow interactively. The capacity to reintermediate strategically leads to the power to reinvent intuitively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our social networks but our ability to grow. Think vertical. Without adequate portals, metrics are forced to become distributed. What does it really mean to transition "interactively"? A company that can actualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate defiantly. Without nano-vertical infrastructures, you will lack models. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to transform. At O'Reilly, we have come to know how to maximize vertically. What does the term "applications" really mean? We will matrix the power of methodologies to redefine. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be virtual? Is it more important for something to be customized, co-branded or to be turn-key? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-sizing management but our power to enable. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. We think we know that if you brand strategically then you may also transform perfectly. Without 60/24/7/365 structuring management, you will lack wireless research and development. Think user-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually incentivize B2B TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We here at O'Reilly believe we know that it is better to monetize strategically than to enable robustly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, cross-media plan of action for monitoring emerging communities? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The capability to enhance intra-intra-seamlessly leads to the capability to cultivate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be viral? What does it really mean to synergize "globally"? Without integrated, back-end infomediaries, you will lack R&D monitoring. Think collaborative, C2B2B. Think customer-directed. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time.