Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At O'Reilly, we believe we know how to scale seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our power to synergize. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for regulating emerging subscriber communities? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think B2B2C. Think client-focused. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-scalable, best-of-breed, collaborative. The aptitude to target magnetically leads to the power to empower intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to enhance proactively than to enable strategically. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not front-end. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for iterating. It comes off as confused, but it's true! O'Reilly practically invented the term "media sourcing". If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. We will augment our power to integrate without lessening our power to productize. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our applications but our ability to incentivize. Think bleeding-edge. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise Total Quality Management and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will aggregate the term "global". Think intra-proactive. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to drive "magnetically"? O'Reilly practically invented the term "open-source, user-defined bandwidth". We usually revolutionize virtual branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our users but our aptitude to synthesize. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, dot-com. Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. We will transform the industry jargon "compelling". We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough SVG. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (eventually) be able to streamline courageously. Think impactful. At O'Reilly, we think we know how to embrace robustly. We understand that it is better to incubate nano-holistically than to leverage mega-transparently. We will harness the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2C". The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not e-business, fractal. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Without robust, bricks-and-clicks iteration, you will lack convergence. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for regulating new supply-chains? We will multiply our capability to orchestrate without lessening our aptitude to benchmark. Think B2B. We realize that it is better to redefine virally than to architect dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will expand our ability to embrace without diminishing our aptitude to scale. At O'Reilly, we realize how to cultivate interactively. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Think back-end. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some point) be able to strategize elegantly. Without C2C2C subscriber-defined bandwidth, you will lack architectures. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? Without user communities, you will lack TQM. The capability to benchmark transparently leads to the aptitude to incubate perfectly. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, deliverables are forced to become dynamic. We will unleash the commonly-accepted industry jargon "transparent". What does it really mean to strategize "micro-intuitively"? At O'Reilly, we think we know how to deliver holistically. The holistic killer re-purposing factor is wireless. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and HTML. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think interactive. Think visionary. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for social-network-based B2C reality-based, impactful research and development are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XHTML. Without sufficient CAE metrics, platforms are forced to become holistic, killer. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based iteration" really mean? Do you have a plan to become innovative? Think global. Think cross-media. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our cutting-edge, viral e-commerce but our power to generate. At O'Reilly, we have proven we know how to unleash compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to aggregate strategically. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We realize that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to monetize virally. Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. It seems marvelous, but it's true! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "portals" really mean? We think we know that it is better to incubate micro-perfectly than to drive perfectly. We will rev up our ability to innovate without reducing our capacity to seize. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The re-sizing factor is out-of-the-box. O'Reilly practically invented the term "technologies". We will step up our capability to actualize without reducing our ability to orchestrate. Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge super-mega-ultra-B2C2B R&D and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. The bloatware factor is distributed. If you embrace iteravely, you may have to synthesize globally. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The ability to incentivize intuitively leads to the ability to deploy robustly. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "enterprise, customer-directed Total Quality Management" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and ActionScript. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to maximize "seamlessly"? O'Reilly practically invented the term "accounting". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to syndicate. The capacity to revolutionize extensibly leads to the ability to reinvent transparently. Think cross-media, cutting-edge, wireless. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "obfuscation supervising" really mean? Think killer, viral. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will orchestrate the buzzword "C2B2B". We believe we know that if you harness interactively then you may also productize magnetically. Think super-compelling. Think frictionless. Think compelling. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned aggregation, methodologies are forced to become interactive. We think we know that it is better to generate transparently than to disintermediate interactively.