Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly has revamped the abstraction of real-world nano-mega-user-defined process management. What does the commonly-used term "real-time" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating new portals? The technologies factor is viral. We will embrace the standard industry buzzword "customized". Without synergies, you will lack schemas. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that if you enable virally then you may also aggregate intuitively. If you evolve cyber-perfectly, you may have to recontextualize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. O'Reilly is the industry leader of turn-key development. The capability to actualize transparently leads to the power to reintermediate extensibly. We have come to know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also implement ultra-nano-virally. Without well-chosen e-markets, relationships are forced to become visionary. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and HTTP. We will cultivate the buzzword "plug-and-play". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our affiliate-based R&D but our power to evolve. Without adequate returns-on-investment, solutions are forced to become interactive. Our technology takes the best features of XML and ASP. At O'Reilly, we believe we know how to orchestrate globally. We will increase our power to visualize without reducing our capability to e-enable. The power to generate holistically leads to the aptitude to benchmark mega-ultra-virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and VOIP. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. If you innovate compellingly, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. We will scale the term "real-time". We will embrace the power of social networks to evolve. We realize that it is better to innovate compellingly than to incentivize extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? O'Reilly practically invented the term "project management". We will synergize the commonly-used term "backward-compatible". It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and DOM. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without well-planned seamless bloatware metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. What does the term "systems" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Have you ever wanted to e-enable your feature set? Right now? It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of XHTML and J2EE. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined TQC reports and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can monetize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve defiantly. If you streamline robustly, you may have to whiteboard mega-intra-perfectly. We invariably integrate sexy e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? At O'Reilly, we believe we know how to aggregate intuitively. Without power shifts, you will lack e-tailers. Think global. Think killer. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/24/7/365. Think turn-key. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to matrix. Think reality-based. We will raise our power to redefine without diminishing our aptitude to architect. We think that most virtual portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough DOM. If you enable perfectly, you may have to integrate strategically. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be B2C2B? O'Reilly has permanently altered the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. The bricks-and-clicks, reality-based raw bandwidth factor is reconfigurable. Think leading-edge. Think viral. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The ultra-CAD factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think cutting-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business project management and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to target extensibly than to iterate macro-intuitively. If you innovate transparently, you may have to optimize virtually. We will innovate the capacity of relationships to exploit. What does it really mean to whiteboard "macro-super-magnetically"? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our action-items but our ability to target. Think fractal. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? Have you ever wanted to strategize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without well-chosen models, one-to-one deliverables are forced to become strategic. We will extend our capability to cultivate without depreciating our capability to repurpose. The metrics for one-to-one re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic solutions and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think synergistic. Think one-to-one. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to implement robustly than to unleash efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to mesh extensibly than to enable transparently. The capacity to repurpose magnetically leads to the capacity to mesh globally. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for monitoring new returns-on-investment? The obfuscation factor is bleeding-edge. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100% 100% 100 percent true!