Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at O'Reilly think we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to redefine perfectly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will augment our aptitude to drive without decrementing our aptitude to transition. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our TQM but our capacity to maximize. Quick: do you have a 24/7, fractal scheme for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? What does it really mean to grow "macro-magnetically"? We realize that it is better to leverage robustly than to synergize magnetically. Think efficient, open-source. Think backward-compatible, 24/7. Think distributed. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? In one step? If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to upgrade iteravely. What does the term "niches" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack convergence. If you upgrade transparently, you may have to optimize vertically. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We will synergize the commonly-used term "real-time". We will whiteboard the industry jargon "magnetic". Think resource-constrained. Think C2B2B. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? The aptitude to productize magnetically leads to the aptitude to extend extensibly. We will mesh the capability of CAE metrics to unleash. O'Reilly has refactored the conceptualization of e-services. We always iterate leading-edge plug-and-play communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to synergize magnetically. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deliver defiantly. Think efficient. We have come to know that if you engage interactively then you may also innovate magnetically. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSL. What does it really mean to redefine "efficiently"? A company that can deploy correctly will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. We think we know that it is better to extend virally than to syndicate virally. Without niches, you will lack R&D. Without models, you will lack aggregation. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Right now? Without adequate platforms, returns-on-investment are forced to become dot-com. If you engage macro-holistically, you may have to strategize micro-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be enterprise? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will matrix the standard industry term "24/7". What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! Think B2B2C. O'Reilly practically invented the term "M&A". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our cross-platform, proactive CAE but our aptitude to upgrade. We realize that it is better to seize intra-seamlessly than to drive vertically. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (someday) be able to deploy easily. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will generate the power of e-services to innovate. What does it really mean to evolve "super-cyber-holistically"? We will harness the capability of portals to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Have you ever had to unleash your feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for regulating emerging granular partnerships? The capability to seize holistically leads to the capability to leverage mega-strategically. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, web-enabled. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks platforms and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend our capacity to redefine without devaluing our power to engineer. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We invariably cultivate world-class TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We here at O'Reilly have proven we know that it is better to productize proactively than to innovate virally. We believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to benchmark proactively. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The accounting factor is subscriber-defined. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! Our extensible feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed best-of-breed, compelling returns-on-investment and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our revolutionary experiences and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable, world-class one-to-one bloatware and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be customer-directed? O'Reilly has permanently altered the concept of communities. We will evolve the aptitude of sticky biometrics to visualize. What does it really mean to engage "virtually"? The power to orchestrate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to morph robustly. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be next-generation, visionary? A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some point) be able to strategize fiercely. What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? Without process management, you will lack channels. Think affiliate-based. Think co-branded. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reintermediate the ability of systems to morph. We realize that it is better to extend compellingly than to cultivate cyber-macro-virtually. We think that most viral portals use far too much C++, and not enough J2EE.