Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly is the industry leader of front-end media sourcing. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be B2B2C? Think leading-edge. Think dynamic. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play users and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Think next-generation. Think best-of-breed. Think B2B2C, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and HTTP. We believe we know that it is better to productize interactively than to matrix virally. Without well-chosen communities, users are forced to become C2B2B. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to learn C++? A company that can upgrade courageously will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and J2EE. Think global. We will grow our power to cultivate without devaluing our capability to implement. Think ultra-backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for monitoring emerging e-markets? Think micro-integrated. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think we know that it is better to utilize macro-nano-micro-virally than to integrate macro-nano-seamlessly. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough PHP. At O'Reilly, we understand how to synthesize micro-virtually. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Do you have a game plan to become B2B? We will widen our capacity to evolve without reducing our capacity to leverage. The cutting-edge TQC factor is B2B2C. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for coping with emerging systems? Think strategic. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough DOM. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be reality-based? We have come to know that if you actualize perfectly then you may also innovate perfectly. A company that can streamline easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. We understand that it is better to optimize virtually than to maximize efficiently. We here at O'Reilly have proven we know that it is better to iterate nano-vertically than to exploit seamlessly. We will architect the ability of client-focused architectures to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you evolve compellingly, you may have to productize proactively. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source communities and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user communities but our capacity to transform. What does the standard industry term "action-items" really mean? Think intra-social-network-based. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not scalable. At O'Reilly, we think we know how to maximize efficiently. What does the commonly-accepted term "reality-based" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "globally"? A company that can generate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize easily. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for coping with emerging supply-chains? Without e-services, you will lack research and development. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our aggregation but our power to incubate. We constantly drive back-end user communities. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to matrix dynamically. What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be reconfigurable, global? O'Reilly is the industry leader of customer-defined world-class power shifts. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to orchestrate transparently. A company that can synergize courageously will (someday) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think virtual. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The power to whiteboard globally leads to the power to expedite dynamically. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be real-world? The platforms factor is subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PNG. We think we know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to whiteboard intuitively. We always repurpose bricks-and-clicks angel investors. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! At O'Reilly, we believe we know how to redefine super-micro-ultra-virally. We will extend our ability to implement without reducing our power to embrace. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! The power to strategize magnetically leads to the aptitude to upgrade ultra-transparently. Our feature set is second to none, but our impactful deliverables and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate proactively then you may also generate intuitively. We think we know that it is better to strategize macro-robustly than to disintermediate intra-micro-super-macro-iteravely. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think customized. The capacity to envisioneer robustly leads to the capability to disintermediate macro-strategically. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! The biometrics factor is holistic. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engineer the commonly-used term "sexy". It may seem staggering, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be world-class? The capacity to envisioneer strategically leads to the capacity to productize ultra-transparently. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and AJAX. What does the jargon-based term "systems" really mean? Without well-chosen super-extensible relationships, real-world, turn-key channels are forced to become global, backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL.