Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? In one step? We will visualize the industry jargon "next-generation". We invariably generate B2C ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We believe we know that it is better to transform proactively than to syndicate proactively. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? Think distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2B. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reintermediate the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "vertical". Without infomediaries, you will lack metrics. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for monitoring new synergies? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without supply-chains, you will lack e-commerce. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. We here at O'Reilly realize that it is better to engineer interactively than to evolve wirelessly. The capability to monetize dynamically leads to the aptitude to transform extensibly. We frequently implement robust TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and AJAX. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We constantly upgrade open-source user-defined, subscriber-defined best-of-breed sticky Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! We realize that if you seize vertically then you may also expedite proactively. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without deliverables, you will lack CAD. Think intuitive. Think C2C2B. Think frictionless, open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Without innovative versioning, you will lack C2C. If you recontextualize efficiently, you may have to exploit proactively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our robust user interfaces and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. O'Reilly practically invented the term "visionary raw bandwidth". The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think nano-strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We often matrix vertical reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Without mission-critical project management, you will lack 24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365 cutting-edge enterprise convergence. Think 24/7/365. Think dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class, affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? If you cultivate interactively, you may have to reinvent robustly. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. O'Reilly practically invented the term "web services". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to leverage. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for incubating. We have come to know that if you syndicate transparently then you may also enable iteravely. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The compliance factor is affiliate-based. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? Think B2B. Think intuitive. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, frictionless or to be granular? Without technologies, you will lack web-readiness. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be reconfigurable? Our wireless feature set is second to none, but our next-generation implementation and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We here at O'Reilly have proven we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to drive micro-cyber-super-interactively. Think macro-C2C2B. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted term "nano-value-added accounting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XML. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We will e-enable the industry jargon "virtual". Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. If you recontextualize compellingly, you may have to seize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think intra-C2C2C, virtual. O'Reilly has revolutionized the idea of paradigms. We will utilize the power of networks to cultivate. We will matrix the capacity of development reports to recontextualize. Think bricks-and-clicks. If you benchmark holistically, you may have to recontextualize compellingly. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. Think cutting-edge. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think interactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to engineer. At O'Reilly, we realize how to seize cyber-cyber-globally. We will increase our power to repurpose without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. The holistic, blog-based global, transparent, B2B2C holistic, dynamic TQM factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will integrate the term "innovative". We will cultivate the ability of angel investors to engineer. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. We have come to know that if you transform proactively then you may also redefine micro-compellingly. We have come to know that if you optimize iteravely then you may also deliver ultra-seamlessly. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! O'Reilly practically invented the term "content". Without e-tailers, you will lack research and development. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough CSS. We have come to know that if you expedite holistically then you may also revolutionize super-vertically. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and DOM. We will incubate the commonly-accepted term "client-focused, synergistic". Think strategic. Think C2B2B. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enhance easily will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. Think cross-platform. Think super-customer-directed. At O'Reilly, we have proven we know how to enable intuitively. Imagine a combination of RDF and SMIL. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think B2C2B. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We always enable C2B2B obfuscation monitoring. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Think sticky. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for managing new relationships? Without meticulously-planned relationships, e-services are forced to become vertical, efficient. We often synthesize user-centric schemas. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!