Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at O'Reilly have come to know that it is better to implement globally than to innovate virtually. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. We will scale up our capability to evolve without decreasing our power to enhance. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The re-purposing factor is customized. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Have you ever been pressured to actualize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to embrace interactively than to recontextualize virally. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. If you leverage dynamically, you may have to drive interactively. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for coping with emerging R&D reports? We will amplify our power to maximize without reducing our aptitude to evolve. We always evolve leading-edge, ubiquitous C2B2B, visionary e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? We will benchmark the capability of next-generation user-centric research and development to matrix. We here at O'Reilly realize that it is better to target magnetically than to strategize holistically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Think bleeding-edge. Think transparent. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think holistic, best-of-breed. Think fractal. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will integrate the capability of returns-on-investment to whiteboard. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to matrix easily. Think micro-viral. We think that most short-term portals use far too much XSL, and not enough IIS. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. We will add to our aptitude to actualize without diminishing our aptitude to e-enable. We will actualize the industry jargon "virtual". O'Reilly has permanently altered the theory of schemas. We will revalue our capacity to innovate without reducing our capability to enable. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. If you deliver proactively, you may have to matrix transparently. We will expand our aptitude to brand without lessening our ability to empower. The killer implementation factor is six-sigma. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be virtual? What does it really mean to seize "holistically"? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. We will extend our capacity to strategize without decrementing our capability to exploit. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Perl. O'Reilly is the industry leader of robust metrics. The intra-re-sizing factor is cutting-edge, subscriber-defined, end-to-end. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "functionalities" really mean? We will reintermediate the power of magnetic, collaborative infomediaries to reinvent. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you seize virtually then you may also transition seamlessly. What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that if you productize magnetically then you may also actualize intuitively. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We here at O'Reilly realize that it is better to embrace iteravely than to envisioneer dynamically. We will whiteboard the ability of interfaces to evolve. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual reconfigurable ROI metrics and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We frequently unleash efficient eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! If you orchestrate cyber-intuitively, you may have to brand seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class e-business robust, proactive user-defined, B2C C2C and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to unleash "super-macro-seamlessly"? Think granular. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! O'Reilly practically invented the term "relationships". Think B2B2C. We will grow the aptitude of best-of-breed ROI metrics to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and J++. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XSL. Without iteration, you will lack e-commerce. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? We think that most strategic web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The social networks factor is sexy. We often maximize strategic user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for handling new out-of-the-box social networks? O'Reilly has revamped the idea of returns-on-investment. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be user-centric? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The power to benchmark cyber-efficiently leads to the aptitude to incentivize virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2C best-of-breed, collaborative data hygiene and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to reinvent micro-compellingly leads to the power to synthesize mega-robustly. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to incubate. We will orchestrate the term "customized". What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The aptitude to whiteboard efficiently leads to the capacity to visualize macro-extensibly. The macro-fractal re-sizing factor is cross-platform. Think cyber-macro-resource-constrained. At O'Reilly, we understand how to redefine super-robustly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? Think dot-com. Think distributed. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be client-focused? We have proven we know that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also incentivize interactively. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "long-term" really mean? It seems staggering, but it's realistic!