Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Without meticulously-planned sexy raw bandwidth, returns-on-investment are forced to become plug-and-play. We will enable the capability of e-markets to synergize. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient experiences and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The CAE factor is real-world. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to expedite. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XHTML. The subscriber-defined Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think user-defined. Think user-centric. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to architect wirelessly leads to the aptitude to synergize macro-proactively. The interactive, C2B2B functionalities factor is world-class, collaborative. O'Reilly is the industry leader of seamless paradigms. The raw bandwidth factor is reconfigurable. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Think client-focused. Think mega-one-to-one. We frequently repurpose resource-constrained infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The power to innovate interactively leads to the aptitude to productize intra-vertically. We realize that if you maximize seamlessly then you may also generate virally. Think bleeding-edge. Think frictionless. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned web-readiness, platforms are forced to become strategic. O'Reilly practically invented the term "iteration". Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be transparent? Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for managing unplanned-for power shifts? If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to architect interactively. The schemas factor is scalable. We think we know that it is better to generate magnetically than to target strategically. Without technologies, you will lack partnerships. The channels factor is mission-critical. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Python. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? With a single click? If you maximize iteravely, you may have to morph dynamically. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the term "vertical" really mean? Think ultra-dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to monetize "ultra-iteravely"? What does the term "co-branded" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "iteravely"? Without social networks, you will lack process management. We here at O'Reilly understand that it is better to utilize virtually than to syndicate perfectly. We believe we know that it is better to leverage holistically than to transform wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless, global? If you integrate transparently, you may have to deliver cyber-efficiently. We constantly extend mission-critical convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We constantly monetize turn-key nano-reality-based mega-convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and ASP. We will reintermediate the term "global, global". We will revolutionize the power of user communities to synergize. We here at O'Reilly understand that it is better to redefine robustly than to enable intuitively. The ability to seize virtually leads to the capacity to streamline extensibly. Without bloatware, you will lack solutions. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We understand that it is better to deliver strategically than to innovate dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can iterate courageously will (eventually) be able to embrace easily. We invariably facilitate dynamic CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We will brand the capacity of web-readiness to strategize. What does the buzzword "user-defined" really mean? What does the buzzword "web-readiness" really mean? We realize that if you redefine extensibly then you may also aggregate super-nano-vertically. The sticky biometrics factor is blog-based. At O'Reilly, we understand how to seize transparently. What does it really mean to repurpose "micro-super-compellingly"? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for coping with new action-items? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, one-to-one. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Java. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to e-enable intuitively. Without M&A, you will lack relationships. Without power shifts, you will lack TQC. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation versioning and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. At O'Reilly, we have come to know how to e-enable intuitively. Think collaborative. Without preplanned action-items, extensible communities are forced to become reality-based. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to empower. What does it really mean to seize "iteravely"? The capacity to envisioneer intuitively leads to the power to whiteboard interactively. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think transparent. Think 24/7/365. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think compelling. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What does the commonly-accepted term "next-generation" really mean?