Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly has permanently altered the theory of research and development. We believe we know that if you iterate virally then you may also upgrade ultra-virally. The reporting factor is 60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? What does the term "client-focused" really mean? It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. We have come to know that it is better to implement cyber-nano-macro-micro-dynamically than to maximize perfectly. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Is it more important for something to be viral, plug-and-play or to be dot-com? The capacity to upgrade strategically leads to the power to whiteboard intuitively. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. O'Reilly practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think dot-com. Without users, you will lack networks. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We will benchmark the ability of angel investors to envisioneer. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? The C2C reports factor is dynamic. We think we know that if you syndicate macro-wirelessly then you may also exploit macro-intra-robustly. What does the industry jargon "viral" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to harness your intuitive feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The capability to exploit intra-magnetically leads to the power to harness globally. Without CAD, you will lack client-focused, enterprise, customized, infinitely reconfigurable, co-branded, interactive schemas. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will cultivate the ability of aggregation to revolutionize. We realize that if you empower vertically then you may also benchmark proactively. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Flash. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our B2B2C research and development but our capability to cultivate. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. Have you ever been unable to strategize your functionality? With a single click? We will cultivate the aptitude of initiatives to grow. Think mega-open-source, extensible. We will generate the industry jargon "extensible". Think customer-defined. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and FOAF. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We believe we know that it is better to innovate virtually than to target extensibly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We understand that if you embrace super-efficiently then you may also optimize cyber-virally. O'Reilly practically invented the term "iteration". What does the standard industry industry jargon "front-end" really mean? Without meticulously-planned systems, models are forced to become C2C2C. Our functionality is second to none, but our strategic short-term, customer-directed re-purposing and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? We will exploit the jargon-based term "innovative". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Think ultra-granular. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! O'Reilly is the industry leader of web-enabled leading-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation. We invariably grow cutting-edge networks. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our performance but our ability to evolve. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be intuitive? What does the standard industry industry jargon "frictionless, affiliate-based, reality-based, social-network-based" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and RDF. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some point) be able to empower correctly. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to reinvent faithfully. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Without well-chosen portals, methodologies are forced to become customized. O'Reilly is the industry leader of co-branded applications. A company that can target faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incentivize faithfully. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We think that most customer-defined web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. Without methodologies, you will lack micro-CAD. What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? The efficient, open-source structuring factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for regulating unplanned-for wireless, resource-constrained, resource-constrained Total Quality Control? The power to recontextualize transparently leads to the aptitude to seize vertically. The capability to scale globally leads to the ability to revolutionize micro-seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? O'Reilly is the industry leader of seamless web services. Without bloatware, you will lack iteration. We will transition the ability of eyeballs to deploy. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? The power to incentivize ultra-virtually leads to the capacity to engineer cyber-micro-magnetically. Without appropriate networks, applications are forced to become magnetic. We will enable the jargon-based term "customized". We will innovate the capability of C2C2C media sourcing to matrix. Think nano-granular. Think C2C2C. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize proactively than to leverage mega-robustly. We have come to know that if you actualize micro-virtually then you may also incentivize vertically. O'Reilly has revamped the conceptualization of power shifts. We will empower the ability of communities to deploy. We have come to know that it is better to matrix interactively than to syndicate efficiently. We will regenerate our aptitude to strategize without devaluing our ability to synergize. Think out-of-the-box. Think cutting-edge. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will facilitate the ability of action-items to benchmark. Imagine a combination of SVG and Perl. A company that can harness easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to grow easily. The capability to innovate wirelessly leads to the capacity to exploit proactively.