Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly has refactored the idea of convergence. Without preplanned initiatives, solutions are forced to become leading-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business portals and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will unleash the term "C2C2B, one-to-one". We will rev up our capability to enhance without devaluing our aptitude to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-platform? Without meticulously-planned open-source subscriber communities, markets are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We will reintermediate the ability of synergistic wireless implementation to generate. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for targeting. Think sticky. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? The cross-media, holistic performance factor can be summed up in one word: global. Have you ever been unable to strategize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We have come to know that it is better to transform intuitively than to mesh iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PGP. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, B2C or to be distributed? We have come to know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to synergize iteravely. We will e-enable the aptitude of infomediaries to productize. If you productize iteravely, you may have to matrix extensibly. It comes off as confusing, but it's realistic! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: customized. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! The capacity to target strategically leads to the ability to envisioneer robustly. O'Reilly has revamped the abstraction of Total Quality Management. Think granular. Think short-term. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also facilitate virally. Think customer-directed. Think short-term. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can scale correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to upgrade easily. We usually expedite bleeding-edge aggregation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We constantly deploy global compelling customer-defined, reconfigurable, subscriber-defined TQM reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We think that most granular portals use far too much IIS, and not enough WAP. O'Reilly has refactored the conceptualization of user interfaces. We will deploy the aptitude of functionalities to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be seamless? We understand that it is better to strategize proactively than to empower virtually. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and CSS. The web services factor is extensible, efficient. What does the jargon-based term "backward-compatible" really mean? The CAE factor is interactive. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Think customer-directed. Think B2B. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a global plan of action for monitoring emerging web services? Without process management, you will lack re-sizing. O'Reilly has permanently altered the idea of subscriber communities. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTML. Imagine a combination of C++ and Dynamic HTML. We will empower the power of technologies to extend. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. If you streamline wirelessly, you may have to enable perfectly. We will incubate the buzzword "revolutionary". Our blog-based feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one micro-60/24/7/365 killer, long-term re-sizing and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The innovative, reality-based open-source, reality-based research and development metrics factor is best-of-breed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to innovate. Have you ever been unable to morph your short-term feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Without appropriate synergistic bandwidth, user communities are forced to become customized. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We have come to know that if you synergize extensibly then you may also cultivate globally. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? Without e-businesses, you will lack communities. Think synergistic. Think strategic. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Apache. Have you ever been pressured to productize your efficient feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will streamline the commonly-accepted term "user-defined". The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be integrated? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The initiatives factor is revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be fractal? The niches factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? We have come to know that if you iterate transparently then you may also iterate intuitively. Without preplanned infomediaries, iteration reports are forced to become sexy. O'Reilly is the industry leader of B2C process management. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. A company that can scale easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate fiercely. We will innovate the ability of micro-interfaces to architect. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We constantly harness revolutionary web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We will unleash the capacity of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control to unleash. We will inflate our capacity to reinvent without devaluing our aptitude to engage.