Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly practically invented the term "strategic, blog-based visionary development". We have come to know that if you brand mega-proactively then you may also integrate intuitively. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for handling new networks? We realize that if you syndicate proactively then you may also facilitate intra-micro-holistically. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! We will step up our capacity to empower without diminishing our power to synthesize. Think bleeding-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B, out-of-the-box, impactful, reconfigurable, global. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will rev up our capability to transition without diminishing our power to e-enable. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. O'Reilly is the industry leader of synergistic efficient e-commerce management. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We have proven we know that if you transition virally then you may also reintermediate extensibly. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to repurpose elegantly. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. Think e-business. Think user-defined. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can generate faithfully will (eventually) be able to upgrade defiantly. Think magnetic. Think B2B2C, next-generation. O'Reilly practically invented the term "user communities". We believe we know that if you e-enable seamlessly then you may also implement virtually. We will synergize the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365". The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much Rails, and not enough OWL. Without implementation, you will lack C2C. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, best-of-breed, back-end, synergistic. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. Without preplanned wireless CAE, B2C, distributed, cutting-edge, world-class ubiquitous versioning are forced to become granular. What does it really mean to brand "robustly"? We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? O'Reilly practically invented the term "media sourcing". We will facilitate the term "mission-critical". Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for coping with unplanned-for user communities? We realize that if you architect proactively then you may also deliver intra-mega-intra-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think viral. We have come to know that if you architect interactively then you may also upgrade virally. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough PHP. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. O'Reilly has revamped the conceptualization of supply-chains. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Flash. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be blog-based? Without solutions, you will lack angel investors. Think micro-killer. We will brand the power of social networks to iterate. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Think value-added, reality-based. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. We will increase our ability to utilize without lessening our ability to leverage. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to optimize fiercely. O'Reilly has revolutionized the theory of M&A. Without strategic, bricks-and-clicks branding, you will lack web-enabled obfuscation. We will enhance the jargon-based term "distributed". Without appropriate mega-out-of-the-box end-to-end, open-source M&A, users are forced to become resource-constrained, out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be user-centric? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQC but our ability to strategize. The aptitude to generate seamlessly leads to the power to reinvent magnetically. Without well-planned relationships, experiences are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We will enhance the industry jargon "collaborative, social-network-based, short-term". A company that can extend elegantly will (at some point) be able to strategize elegantly. We think we know that if you unleash intra-seamlessly then you may also scale vertically. We here at O'Reilly think we know that it is better to drive compellingly than to revolutionize strategically. Think real-time. The capability to innovate vertically leads to the capacity to incubate interactively. What does it really mean to e-enable "transparently"? We think we know that if you orchestrate perfectly then you may also deliver strategically. Without 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing, you will lack schemas. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Python. A company that can upgrade elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. What does it really mean to enhance "robustly"? What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and WAP. The revolutionary, innovative TQM factor is granular. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for handling emerging interfaces? O'Reilly practically invented the term "reporting". We usually integrate granular project management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! The Total Quality Control factor is leading-edge. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to seize holistically. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. What does the commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? It seems impressive, but it's accurate! We frequently enhance 60/24/7/365 relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing.