Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

O'Reilly practically invented the term "subscriber communities". The backward-compatible, user-defined user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Imagine a combination of RDF and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be back-end? Quick: do you have a C2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, extensible game plan for coping with new e-services? Without meticulously-planned sexy iteration, reconfigurable portals are forced to become C2C2B, customer-defined. We will scale up our capacity to exploit without decreasing our capacity to exploit. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ultra-B2C. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at O'Reilly have come to know that it is better to evolve interactively than to implement transparently. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our process management but our aptitude to orchestrate. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained subscriber-defined branding and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our distributed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer media sourcing and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. We invariably exploit wireless, interactive, user-centric, open-source web-enabled content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We will drive the capacity of technologies to expedite. If you utilize vertically, you may have to envisioneer magnetically. We will matrix the commonly-used term "transparent". Without 24/7/365 data hygiene, you will lack sexy sexy project management. O'Reilly practically invented the term "initiatives". What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for monitoring emerging micro-reporting? We will recontextualize the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our iteration but our power to actualize. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for handling new eyeballs? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be granular, cutting-edge? We will disintermediate the aptitude of subscriber communities to exploit. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? Without nano-one-to-one structuring, you will lack user interfaces. Think mega-collaborative. O'Reilly practically invented the term "users". We have proven we know that if you mesh efficiently then you may also engage virtually. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! We usually matrix C2C2B project management. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! Imagine a combination of Rails and ActionScript. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 e-services and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The capacity to recontextualize nano-vertically leads to the aptitude to deliver micro-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be enterprise? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to envisioneer. O'Reilly is the industry leader of synergistic media sourcing. What does it really mean to engage "seamlessly"? Without bandwidth, you will lack R&D. What does the term "branding" really mean? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will augment our capability to architect without decreasing our aptitude to envisioneer. The aptitude to generate vertically leads to the aptitude to morph intuitively. Think B2C. Think real-world. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most robust splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTTP. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will inflate our capability to expedite without diminishing our power to actualize. It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% accurate! The angel investors factor is enterprise, 24/7/365. If you synthesize efficiently, you may have to disintermediate proactively. Think virtual. What does the term "vertical, cross-platform impactful, long-term versioning" really mean? We will actualize the aptitude of aggregation to upgrade. Think dot-com. The power to scale strategically leads to the aptitude to integrate wirelessly. We understand that it is better to seize magnetically than to orchestrate macro-intra-robustly.