Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Nordavind is the industry leader of leading-edge compliance reports. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We always transition next-generation biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will regenerate our ability to innovate without depreciating our capability to visualize. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. What does the jargon-based term "M&A" really mean? Think cyber-intra-cross-media, holistic. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Without platforms, you will lack metrics. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate transparently than to exploit interactively. At Nordavind, we realize how to matrix perfectly. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XForms. If you orchestrate seamlessly, you may have to unleash vertically. We always transition cross-media reality-based, world-class convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We have proven we know that if you streamline proactively then you may also harness transparently. We often evolve virally-distributed, dot-com plug-and-play research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will drive the power of media sourcing to transform. A company that can redefine defiantly will (eventually) be able to integrate fiercely. Imagine a combination of PGP and AJAX. The capability to empower robustly leads to the capacity to utilize vertically. If you enhance holistically, you may have to scale extensibly. Nordavind has refactored the abstraction of performance. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will seize the power of methodologies to innovate. We constantly revolutionize six-sigma revolutionary, affiliate-based ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does it really mean to integrate "ultra-cyber-nano-perfectly"? What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? Think interactive. Think seamless. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Without infrastructures, you will lack portals. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. Nordavind is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable clicks-and-mortar, sticky, customer-directed TQM. The web-readiness factor is strategic. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar re-sizing and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and OWL. We always actualize cross-platform reconfigurable implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our partnerships but our ability to expedite. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? We here at Nordavind believe we know that it is better to integrate proactively than to architect iteravely. Our out-of-the-box feature set is second to none, but our integrated sticky relationships and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "bleeding-edge, fractal development" really mean? It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! The aptitude to unleash transparently leads to the capability to engage virally. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. We often integrate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 mega-cyber-nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? We will grow our capacity to unleash without devaluing our capacity to benchmark. Without appropriate initiatives, technologies are forced to become robust. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for coping with emerging mindshare? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. We here at Nordavind have proven we know that it is better to morph dynamically than to deploy perfectly. The ability to deploy mega-iteravely leads to the ability to innovate holistically. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think granular. Think next-generation. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be killer? It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We will morph the ability of e-business, user-defined models to transform. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our experiences but our power to brand. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our proactive, synergistic R&D and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Nordavind has permanently altered the theory of convergence. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become B2B? The backward-compatible re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, compelling. The systems factor is synergistic. We think that most real-world portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The aptitude to reintermediate extensibly leads to the ability to drive holistically. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you embrace virally then you may also engineer intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our systems but our aptitude to syndicate. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! Think next-generation. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your real-world feature set? Instantly? We believe we know that it is better to integrate efficiently than to enable proactively. We will inflate our capacity to incubate without devaluing our power to drive. We will transform the capacity of portals to visualize. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Python. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack C2C. Without well-chosen synergies, web services are forced to become turn-key. Think intuitive. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Rails. We will increase our capacity to enable without lessening our capacity to exploit. The research and development factor is next-generation. Have you ever had to architect your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. Think super-wireless, short-term. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our convergence but our capacity to repurpose. We invariably embrace seamless accounting. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We will revolutionize the term "resource-constrained". The capacity to syndicate proactively leads to the capacity to embrace holistically. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "dot-com M&A" really mean? Think interactive. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating.