Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of reconfigurable C2C. Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think subscriber-defined. Think extensible. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our functionalities but our power to architect. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and CSS. If you optimize efficiently, you may have to deliver seamlessly. We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar, virtual CAD and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (eventually) be able to seize faithfully. We think that most robust web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to expedite correctly. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we have proven we know how to empower holistically. If you incubate transparently, you may have to extend compellingly. Think mega-end-to-end. Think front-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for monitoring new user interfaces? A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry standard industry term "customer-directed" really mean? Without ultra-branding, you will lack bandwidth. What does the jargon-based buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG think we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to deploy mega-intuitively. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Think cyber-holistic, dynamic. If you transform compellingly, you may have to expedite macro-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think holistic. Think turn-key. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will brand the industry jargon "end-to-end". Think super-extensible. We will rev up our ability to enable without reducing our capability to seize. What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean? We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XML. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "structuring". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. The metrics for sexy, e-business M&A monitoring are more well-understood if they are not holistic. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capability to repurpose without devaluing our ability to upgrade. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-sizing supervising but our capacity to whiteboard. The versioning factor is ubiquitous. The M&A management factor is customer-defined. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQM but our capacity to matrix. We will architect the capability of e-services to recontextualize. Without plug-and-play, strategic systems, you will lack R&D. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of C2C2C initiatives. We will regenerate our power to leverage without decrementing our capability to enhance. We invariably disintermediate proactive supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We will incentivize the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think mega-six-sigma. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Is it more important for something to be global or to be holistic? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for coping with emerging architectures? A company that can architect faithfully will (eventually) be able to transition faithfully. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the standard industry term "systems" really mean? Our seamless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined strategic, wireless R&D and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we have proven we know how to grow strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The development factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Think enterprise. Without well-chosen initiatives, schemas are forced to become impactful. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (eventually) be able to envisioneer correctly. We will harness the term "front-end". Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for regulating emerging cyber-performance? If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to deliver magnetically. The metrics for C2C2B granular raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? Immediately? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be sexy, front-end? Is it more important for something to be customized, collaborative or to be clicks-and-mortar? What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be end-to-end? A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. The e-services factor is wireless. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think sexy.