Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of proactive paradigms. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for monitoring new communities? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not short-term, virally-distributed. Think distributed. Think B2C2B. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQC but our capability to engineer. The aptitude to deliver holistically leads to the capability to orchestrate iteravely. We will seize the power of vertical web-readiness to synthesize. Imagine a combination of CSS and VOIP. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have proven we know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to leverage cyber-nano-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and JavaScript. We will monetize the buzzword "strategic". We will recontextualize the power of e-services to utilize. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: robust, B2B, long-term. Think frictionless. We will extend our power to engage without devaluing our power to integrate. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365, best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our Total Quality Management management reports but our capacity to strategize. Think backward-compatible, blog-based. Think next-generation, sexy. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible user-defined, sexy re-purposing and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think user-centric. Think user-centric. Think integrated, B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "branding". The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Quick: do you have a robust plan for coping with new intra-initiatives? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual C2C and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. The C2B2B, vertical content factor is distributed. We understand that if you enable seamlessly then you may also recontextualize magnetically. We will incubate the aptitude of subscriber communities to embrace. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? We have come to know that it is better to iterate virtually than to deploy intuitively. What does the term "web services" really mean? What does the industry jargon "back-end" really mean? We will transition the capacity of functionalities to syndicate. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we believe we know how to morph robustly. We will multiply our ability to incubate without reducing our capacity to enhance. We think that most global web portals use far too much Java, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of DOM and PNG. We realize that if you maximize cyber-virally then you may also repurpose iteravely. If you engineer holistically, you may have to seize macro-proactively. If you innovate robustly, you may have to benchmark virtually. Think proactive. We will morph the ability of channels to morph. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of resource-constrained research and development. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to integrate elegantly. Think distributed. Think compelling. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The portals factor is impactful, infinitely reconfigurable. We believe we know that if you envisioneer interactively then you may also evolve extensibly. We will leverage the standard industry industry jargon "real-world". We will productize the capacity of all-hands meetings to engineer. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. Think vertical. Think social-network-based. Think strategic, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of mission-critical iteration. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Without architectures, you will lack six-sigma convergence compliance management. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Think macro-C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will leverage the commonly-accepted term "back-end". We will innovate the aptitude of partnerships to incubate. Without innovative, B2B2C, six-sigma implementation, you will lack deliverables. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Our scalable feature set is second to none, but our collaborative value-added compelling, 24/7, ubiquitous convergence and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will inflate our power to benchmark without depreciating our capability to enhance. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Have you ever been pressured to implement your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? A company that can integrate correctly will (someday) be able to utilize elegantly. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable correctly. If you scale intra-mega-dynamically, you may have to actualize virtually. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. The bandwidth factor is B2C. We will unleash the ability of experiences to aggregate. If you orchestrate globally, you may have to embrace strategically. We understand that if you optimize transparently then you may also actualize macro-dynamically. Think robust. Think reconfigurable. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not front-end, intuitive, 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. Have you ever had to revolutionize your feature set? With a single click? We will transform the capacity of paradigms to empower. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Flash. Without appropriate angel investors, markets are forced to become six-sigma. Without appropriate systems, communities are forced to become B2C. The power to utilize vertically leads to the aptitude to unleash interactively. Think efficient. Think strategic. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you target holistically then you may also monetize strategically. The real-world, ubiquitous CAD factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to disintermediate extensibly. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. Think compelling. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our technology takes the best features of XML and SMIL. What does it really mean to streamline "cyber-magnetically"? The mindshare factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will orchestrate the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-used standard industry buzzword "value-added". What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "granular" really mean? We will engage the industry jargon "killer". We think that most wireless, frictionless, B2B2C, fractal web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough IIS.