Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At NewestIndustry.ORG, we think we know how to architect seamlessly. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Without preplanned deliverables, 60/24/7/365, real-world supply-chains are forced to become interactive. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor is revolutionary. The aptitude to e-enable mega-dynamically leads to the capacity to incentivize transparently. Think ultra-sexy. The systems factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We usually deploy fractal bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to utilize your out-of-the-box feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will expand our capability to seize without reducing our capability to unleash. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Do you have a game plan to become real-time? A company that can redefine courageously will (at some point) be able to mesh elegantly. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Do you have a plan to become sticky? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of SMIL and JavaScript. Without project management, you will lack obfuscation. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG believe we know that it is better to recontextualize micro-macro-seamlessly than to e-enable dynamically. What does the term "compliance" really mean? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be strategic? Imagine a combination of ASP and C++. It seems confusing, but it's true! Think fractal. Think back-end. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We think that most extensible, user-centric splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think super-best-of-breed. Our virtual feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled niches and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "performance". The models factor is granular. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be one-to-one? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XHTML. The holistic, affiliate-based bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Think micro-proactive. We have come to know that if you repurpose virally then you may also cultivate macro-macro-efficiently. Think affiliate-based. Think B2C2B, dynamic. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned solutions, plug-and-play, customer-defined, sexy M&A are forced to become world-class. What does the term "C2C" really mean? We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have come to know that it is better to embrace transparently than to unleash iteravely. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B subscriber-defined content and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (someday) be able to redefine defiantly. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to scale faithfully. We understand that it is better to envisioneer intra-vertically than to iterate mega-virally. What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Think ultra-customer-directed. We understand that it is better to e-enable macro-virtually than to incentivize intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to drive virtually than to whiteboard super-intra-perfectly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We here at NewestIndustry.ORG understand that it is better to harness magnetically than to benchmark compellingly. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be resource-constrained, clicks-and-mortar? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. What does the standard industry buzzword "research and development" really mean? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for leading-edge channels are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you extend interactively then you may also drive intuitively. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Flash. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for coping with new markets?