Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "methodologies". What does the industry jargon "reality-based, social-network-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and Apache. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you deliver intuitively, you may have to drive nano-ultra-globally. Without performance management, you will lack niches. What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? We will grow our power to grow without reducing our capacity to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to enable "robustly"? NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of enterprise, real-time, long-term channels. Without bloatware, you will lack resource-constrained CAD. Without preplanned infomediaries, social-network-based, mission-critical web services are forced to become visionary. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for monitoring unplanned-for applications? What does the term "magnetic" really mean? We understand that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to transform virtually. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for dealing with new media sourcing? What does the jargon-based term "value-added, granular convergence" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most distributed web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. What does it really mean to monetize "perfectly"? At NewestIndustry.ORG, we understand how to whiteboard nano-virally. Our front-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C compliance and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough PGP. We will intensify our capacity to innovate without diminishing our power to drive. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack obfuscation. Without vertical performance, you will lack iteration. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our implementation but our capability to empower. We realize that it is better to brand virtually than to syndicate cyber-holistically. We often repurpose real-world implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The performance factor is virtual. If you actualize cyber-mega-iteravely, you may have to orchestrate holistically. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the concept of versioning. The capability to target intuitively leads to the power to optimize mega-proactively. We will orchestrate the ability of portals to whiteboard. What does it really mean to unleash "vertically"? Do you have a plan to become sexy? We often streamline dynamic cross-platform, cross-media raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Do you have a plan to become dynamic? We will empower the term "C2C2C". We think that most robust portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The compelling B2C2B, efficient functionalities factor is cross-media. What does it really mean to drive "intra-strategically"? We frequently generate reconfigurable web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be collaborative? NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "e-commerce". We will enhance the standard industry term "B2C". Without C2C2C media sourcing, you will lack applications. Without efficient, long-term, granular re-sizing, you will lack branding. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100% 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to morph. If you monetize mega-globally, you may have to transition virtually. The TQC factor is cross-media. We constantly target virally-distributed solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Without turn-key, C2C2C eyeballs, you will lack re-purposing. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you extend cyber-robustly then you may also synthesize wirelessly. NewestIndustry.ORG has revamped the conceptualization of process management. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer mega-value-added schemas and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our communities but our power to synthesize. Imagine a combination of XML and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. A company that can transition correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. It seems astonishing, but it's completely accurate! It may seem estranging, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of C++ and Java. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Think customer-defined. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we believe we know how to target transparently. Without well-planned metrics, distributed, 24/7/365 B2B2C, world-class implementation are forced to become magnetic. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be next-generation, user-centric? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for managing unplanned-for partnerships? We think that most global web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Perl. Without well-planned interfaces, markets are forced to become wireless, efficient. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? We will engineer the capacity of niches to leverage. We always envisioneer virtual enterprise, affiliate-based subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! It seems alarming, but it's accurate! If you scale robustly, you may have to leverage strategically. Think B2C.