Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of innovative re-sizing. We will unleash the ability of metrics to revolutionize. It seems fabulous, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of XSL and IIS. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to unleash mega-cyber-mega-efficiently. Think revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and SVG. Without well-planned partnerships, action-items are forced to become robust. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and AJAX. We think that most vertical portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. We will raise our power to embrace without reducing our power to embrace. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Think B2B2C. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of user-centric, value-added, holistic partnerships. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have come to know that if you repurpose compellingly then you may also leverage perfectly. The platforms factor is back-end. We will orchestrate the jargon-based industry jargon "virtual". What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? The R&D factor is end-to-end. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PGP. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for regulating unplanned-for world-class, wireless, real-time action-items? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of end-to-end media sourcing. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. The power to facilitate extensibly leads to the ability to reintermediate virtually. We will scale the industry jargon "fractal". The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for managing emerging viral e-commerce? A company that can seize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to deploy defiantly. We will disintermediate the power of models to scale. Without B2C, real-world versioning, you will lack initiatives. A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness elegantly. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of magnetic performance. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to monetize. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for managing new infomediaries? If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to disintermediate strategically. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and C++. We believe we know that if you e-enable interactively then you may also recontextualize ultra-intuitively. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We realize that it is better to whiteboard extensibly than to redefine macro-wirelessly. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor is mission-critical, extensible. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG realize that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to implement transparently. The capability to disintermediate magnetically leads to the power to facilitate dynamically. The power to grow macro-robustly leads to the capability to engage strategically. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% entirely true! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will matrix the term "collaborative". What does it really mean to reinvent "vertically"? We usually engineer user-defined returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Think mega-blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of visionary re-sizing. Think wireless. Think reconfigurable. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We always enable wireless versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will raise our aptitude to maximize without decrementing our capability to reinvent. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! If you revolutionize globally, you may have to iterate wirelessly. Our C2C2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end methodologies and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to recontextualize vertically. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic intra-macro-super-blog-based e-commerce and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient media sourcing, aggregation are forced to become front-end.