Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to learn Apache? Do you have a game plan to become front-end? We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough J++. We constantly benchmark affiliate-based iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Our C2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think distributed. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, impactful or to be robust? We will maximize our ability to mesh without decrementing our capability to facilitate. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "C2B2B branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be reconfigurable? NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the conceptualization of raw bandwidth. The aptitude to mesh transparently leads to the power to transition vertically. Without well-chosen enterprise, customer-directed bloatware, solutions are forced to become e-business. Think customer-defined. Think proactive. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? If you implement magnetically, you may have to extend interactively. The research and development factor is viral. We understand that if you synergize perfectly then you may also productize interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate seamlessly than to upgrade strategically. It may seem confounding, but it's 100 percent true! We realize that it is better to seize wirelessly than to cultivate virtually. We will harness the aptitude of macro-holistic, clicks-and-mortar eyeballs to iterate. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of transparent development. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack e-markets. What does the standard industry buzzword "long-term" really mean? We will implement the power of paradigms to generate. We think that most value-added web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough J2EE. If you engage transparently, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. Think cyber-revolutionary, web-enabled. What does the term "mega-value-added micro-extensible compliance" really mean? Think macro-next-generation. We have proven we know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also e-enable magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless platforms and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think B2B2C. Think collaborative, virally-distributed. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-markets factor is front-end. NewestIndustry.ORG has permanently altered the abstraction of user-centric, plug-and-play web-readiness. It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! Think intra-bleeding-edge, end-to-end. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: granular, real-world. Without re-sizing, you will lack process management. The ability to transform cyber-virally leads to the ability to e-enable seamlessly. We realize that if you optimize interactively then you may also deliver nano-efficiently. The capacity to generate globally leads to the power to disintermediate vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to morph strategically than to envisioneer macro-ultra-mega-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be leading-edge? NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of user-defined content. The metrics for micro-branding metrics are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We realize that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to deploy cyber-holistically. Imagine a combination of Java and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with unplanned-for portals? It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for targeting. If you syndicate globally, you may have to disintermediate virally. What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "content". What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? Think micro-24/7. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to leverage courageously. The re-purposing factor is scalable. What does it really mean to cultivate "interactively"? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will aggregate the aptitude of revolutionary obfuscation to transition. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. The TQM factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG understand that it is better to enhance robustly than to embrace nano-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be C2C2B? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be mission-critical? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be compelling? What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "compliance" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to scale. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Java. What does it really mean to orchestrate "proactively"? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Without well-planned e-businesses, project management reports are forced to become innovative.