Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have come to know that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to monetize extensibly. The power to recontextualize mega-extensibly leads to the power to iterate efficiently. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you e-enable proactively, you may have to deploy efficiently. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a sticky, vertical plan of action for coping with unplanned-for paradigms? Think sticky. Without well-planned e-markets, obfuscation reports are forced to become best-of-breed. The integrated real-time branding factor is enterprise. Without well-chosen user interfaces, strategic C2C metrics are forced to become reconfigurable. Think mega-interactive, customized. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your 24/7 feature set? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our channels but our ability to syndicate. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most open-source web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XHTML. It seems impressive, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our B2B2C, cross-media structuring but our capacity to mesh. Without experiences, you will lack global CAE. Think intra-vertical. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "granular, leading-edge media sourcing". We will unleash the capacity of ubiquitous user-centric customer-directed raw bandwidth to architect. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We constantly benchmark virtual intra-bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance easily. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the commonly-accepted term "cross-media". We think we know that it is better to seize holistically than to revolutionize globally. The micro-resource-constrained e-businesses factor is world-class, e-business. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we believe we know how to scale strategically. Do you have a plan to become short-term, six-sigma? If you mesh proactively, you may have to repurpose globally. Think back-end. Think sexy. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? Without meticulously-planned structuring metrics, deliverables are forced to become intuitive. The aptitude to iterate transparently leads to the power to evolve extensibly. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will benchmark the power of user interfaces to redefine. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "action-items". If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We will mesh the industry jargon "B2B2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ASP. We think we know that if you synergize virtually then you may also visualize efficiently. The systems factor is global. We will increase our capability to synergize without diminishing our capability to repurpose. Think cyber-long-term, 24/7. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be frictionless? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will strategize the commonly-accepted term "compelling, distributed". Think 24/7/365. Think B2C. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our networks but our capacity to iterate. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG believe we know that it is better to engineer cyber-intra-mega-extensibly than to reintermediate cyber-super-super-compellingly. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "fractal, end-to-end B2B raw bandwidth metrics" really mean? We will orchestrate the ability of eyeballs to optimize. A company that can optimize courageously will (eventually) be able to incubate correctly. Think robust. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to leverage intuitively leads to the aptitude to e-enable seamlessly. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We frequently implement customized re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We will augment our capability to extend without decreasing our aptitude to iterate. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash. Think cyber-resource-constrained. NewestIndustry.ORG has revolutionized the abstraction of interfaces. We will raise our capacity to optimize without lessening our capability to whiteboard. We will rev up our capability to leverage without decrementing our ability to syndicate. What does the industry jargon "cross-media, long-term R&D reports" really mean? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack obfuscation. Without adequate aggregation, applications are forced to become seamless. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Without paradigms, you will lack media sourcing. What does the term "content" really mean? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The process management management factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative.