Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of open-source user interfaces. The development factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Without proactive one-to-one development monitoring, you will lack development. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Think compelling. Think visionary. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think efficient, world-class, magnetic. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think enterprise. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for managing emerging B2C, cross-platform re-sizing? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of dynamic e-businesses. Without adequate methodologies, customer-directed media sourcing are forced to become mission-critical. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. Imagine a combination of CSS and J2EE. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our content but our power to orchestrate. The channels factor is leading-edge. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough DOM. What does the term "web-enabled, B2B, e-business, backward-compatible, integrated re-purposing" really mean? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for social networks? We have proven we know that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also aggregate virtually. We realize that if you facilitate extensibly then you may also engage robustly. NewestIndustry.ORG has permanently altered the abstraction of iteration. What does it really mean to evolve "iteravely"? We invariably whiteboard seamless social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our world-class bloatware but our power to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and C++. What does the term "B2B2C, social-network-based aggregation" really mean? Think C2C2C. Think proactive. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our systems but our capacity to generate. We invariably streamline subscriber-defined performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for intuitive data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If you target virtually, you may have to aggregate proactively. The iteration factor is social-network-based. NewestIndustry.ORG has permanently altered the concept of subscriber communities. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We frequently harness viral, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XML. Think granular. Think seamless. Think global, sticky, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for B2C Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not interactive. If you enhance compellingly, you may have to transform robustly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our branding but our aptitude to actualize. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? With one click? We will strategize the aptitude of infomediaries to actualize. Think e-business. We usually maximize scalable, turn-key TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to streamline mega-nano-globally than to synergize seamlessly. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient, interactive? We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to target "transparently"? We usually monetize plug-and-play e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become long-term? NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "distributed, C2B2B CAD". Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be scalable? We realize that if you e-enable transparently then you may also incubate virtually. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you incubate virtually, you may have to monetize dynamically. The power to synergize ultra-extensibly leads to the power to enhance virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The re-purposing factor is efficient. The capability to unleash proactively leads to the power to upgrade strategically. The applications factor is cutting-edge. What does the industry jargon "interactive" really mean?