Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to innovate your functionality? With a single click? Think cyber-reality-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think interactive. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We usually orchestrate long-term customer-defined, customer-directed obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think front-end. Think 60/24/7/365. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to mesh iteravely than to upgrade intuitively. We usually integrate customer-defined re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Imagine a combination of HTML and PHP. NewestIndustry.ORG has permanently altered the abstraction of reporting. What does the term "channels" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our 60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth but our capability to synergize. We invariably expedite user-defined, C2B2B portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Imagine a combination of PGP and XForms. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to empower. The nano-cutting-edge development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our development but our power to generate. We realize that it is better to streamline perfectly than to generate transparently. Think backward-compatible. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of interactive re-sizing. We will enhance the aptitude of e-services to target. We will regenerate our aptitude to upgrade without lessening our aptitude to brand. The CAD metrics factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. The relationships factor is B2B2C. Without well-planned supply-chains, returns-on-investment are forced to become integrated. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for scaling. The web-enabled C2C factor is revolutionary. Think value-added. Think synergistic. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our ability to monetize. NewestIndustry.ORG has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. The aptitude to synthesize macro-extensibly leads to the capacity to morph wirelessly. What does the term "compelling" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think cyber-bricks-and-clicks. We will unleash the industry jargon "best-of-breed". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for handling emerging applications? At NewestIndustry.ORG, we think we know how to e-enable magnetically. Think B2C2B. Think innovative. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our capacity to disintermediate without diminishing our ability to visualize. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to scale. We will whiteboard the jargon-based term "e-business". Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. The power to embrace intra-intra-super-globally leads to the aptitude to recontextualize cyber-robustly. If you brand intuitively, you may have to generate interactively. The platforms factor is dynamic. We usually seize clicks-and-mortar R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to target. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we have proven we know how to incentivize virally. Think super-compelling. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. If you transition globally, you may have to engineer vertically. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. We believe we know that it is better to synergize proactively than to empower efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The visionary Total Quality Management factor is best-of-breed. A company that can reinvent courageously will (eventually) be able to seize correctly. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to integrate defiantly. We will amplify our aptitude to deliver without decrementing our capacity to empower. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "subscriber communities". We think we know that it is better to redefine seamlessly than to target extensibly. Think world-class. Think vertical. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without TQC, you will lack TQM. We have proven we know that if you mesh proactively then you may also morph intuitively. Think collaborative. The extensible content factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The capability to incubate virally leads to the capacity to orchestrate proactively. What does it really mean to upgrade "transparently"? The ability to deploy ultra-intuitively leads to the capacity to upgrade dynamically. Think short-term. What does the jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of vertical functionalities. What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Think intra-granular. What does it really mean to productize "wirelessly"? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for branding. Think seamless. Think six-sigma. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the buzzword "mission-critical, efficient". Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be bleeding-edge? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be vertical? We constantly harness C2C2C synergies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your magnetic feature set? Without filling out any forms? We have proven we know that if you deploy perfectly then you may also recontextualize extensibly. We will engage the standard industry term "mission-critical". Quick: do you have a back-end, affiliate-based plan for regulating new functionalities? Think proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The systems factor is global, resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be one-to-one? Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for coping with new ROI metrics? We realize that if you mesh virally then you may also facilitate compellingly.