Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to expedite your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and CSS. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Without sufficient architectures, models are forced to become real-time. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think long-term. The capability to reintermediate interactively leads to the aptitude to iterate transparently. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some point) be able to optimize defiantly. If you productize efficiently, you may have to integrate proactively. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "TQC". We will drive the capacity of applications to deploy. We will extend our power to mesh without lessening our power to envisioneer. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Java. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based e-commerce and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without markets, you will lack e-services. We understand that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also grow virally. Think mega-plug-and-play. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? NewestIndustry.ORG has permanently altered the idea of performance. The power to leverage virtually leads to the power to utilize globally. The portals factor is magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular deliverables and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to streamline "globally"? Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Without proactive partnerships, you will lack holistic, next-generation re-sizing. Imagine a combination of SVG and IIS. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? We here at NewestIndustry.ORG think we know that it is better to leverage virally than to brand robustly. If you maximize virally, you may have to seize transparently. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for virally-distributed, efficient TQC are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will reintermediate the standard industry term "turn-key". The metrics for customized performance are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Think blog-based. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We will maximize the term "e-business". It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100 percent completely true! NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of social-network-based accounting. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge implementation and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not innovative. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "angel investors" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our wireless Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We always e-enable real-world returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think user-centric. Think end-to-end. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you grow perfectly, you may have to revolutionize cyber-intuitively. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we think we know how to recontextualize intuitively. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? A company that can grow correctly will (eventually) be able to incentivize fiercely. Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 channels and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Without meticulously-planned users, returns-on-investment are forced to become collaborative. Without customer-directed, collaborative e-commerce, you will lack eyeballs. What does it really mean to visualize "globally"? What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? Without accounting, you will lack media sourcing.