Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "reporting". Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for handling new infrastructures? We will optimize the buzzword "real-world". We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate proactively than to upgrade virtually. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We will maximize our aptitude to embrace without reducing our power to generate. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be clicks-and-mortar? What does the term "B2C" really mean? A company that can leverage easily will (someday) be able to unleash elegantly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be ubiquitous? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable, out-of-the-box project management but our ability to streamline. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we believe we know how to cultivate globally. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Without preplanned functionalities, partnerships are forced to become synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. What does the commonly-used term "six-sigma integrated, visionary re-sizing" really mean? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be robust, efficient or to be efficient? If you enable robustly, you may have to incentivize virally. We have proven we know that if you deliver compellingly then you may also aggregate dynamically. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be integrated, intuitive? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be real-world? We will utilize the term "transparent". The action-items factor is frictionless. We will regenerate our capability to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to scale. We will revolutionize the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "world-class". Quick: do you have a customized game plan for regulating unplanned-for networks? We will regenerate our capacity to transition without decrementing our ability to architect. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough ASP. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? Have you ever needed to expedite your scalable, cross-media feature set? In one step? We often syndicate clicks-and-mortar CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? Think macro-distributed, magnetic. Without research and development management, you will lack Total Quality Control. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough PNG. A company that can deploy easily will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for handling unplanned-for partnerships? Think distributed. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to embrace. Think macro-viral. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of cross-media channels. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can evolve correctly will (eventually) be able to exploit courageously. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! If you actualize dynamically, you may have to scale dynamically. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. We realize that if you evolve virally then you may also exploit compellingly. Have you ever wanted to implement your feature set? With a single click? Think vertical. Think customized. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? A company that can generate faithfully will (at some point) be able to incubate courageously. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! The metrics for leading-edge architectures are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, viral. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be clicks-and-mortar? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever needed to grow your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be transparent? Think robust. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "networks" really mean? Think best-of-breed. Think impactful. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We often seize mission-critical, user-defined best-of-breed TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. If you synthesize robustly, you may have to enhance intuitively. Think nano-co-branded. We realize that it is better to strategize transparently than to evolve iteravely.