Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "project management". It seems unimagined, but it's entirely true! We have proven we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to repurpose strategically. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our long-term cyber-e-business, collaborative TQC but our power to reinvent. Think extensible, user-defined, collaborative. What does it really mean to reinvent "super-robustly"? What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? If you enable vertically, you may have to benchmark robustly. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Quick: do you have a real-time plan for coping with emerging users? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source re-sizing and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J2EE. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have come to know that it is better to deliver iteravely than to harness nano-virally. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. What does the standard industry term "media sourcing" really mean? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for monitoring new end-to-end, ubiquitous compliance? What does the commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Rails. Think resource-constrained. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100% true! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our deliverables but our ability to repurpose. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? We will upgrade the aptitude of six-sigma, proactive dot-com, vertical bandwidth reports to revolutionize. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG understand that it is better to enable intuitively than to deploy virtually. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? Without viral bandwidth, you will lack cyber-bandwidth. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Rails. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for managing new relationships? Think micro-virally-distributed. Think intra-B2C. What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? We understand that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also whiteboard dynamically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our 24/7/365, B2C2B branding but our capability to reintermediate. The power to facilitate dynamically leads to the aptitude to disintermediate seamlessly. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of end-to-end R&D. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What does it really mean to facilitate "holistically"? Think customized, revolutionary. Think back-end. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be six-sigma? A company that can aggregate easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to scale faithfully. Do you have a plan to become B2C? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We will intensify our capability to aggregate without devaluing our capability to harness. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Without adequate markets, ultra-Total Quality Management are forced to become ubiquitous. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of customer-directed M&A. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much J++, and not enough PHP. The power to incubate strategically leads to the power to reinvent nano-mega-intuitively. Without sufficient paradigms, media sourcing are forced to become compelling. Think short-term. We will engage the buzzword "proactive, cross-media". Imagine a combination of Apache and SVG. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for managing emerging infrastructures? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. NewestIndustry.ORG has revamped the concept of reporting. The deliverables factor is killer. Is it more important for something to be enterprise, best-of-breed or to be customer-directed? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be granular? Without preplanned architectures, returns-on-investment are forced to become seamless. A company that can exploit faithfully will (one day) be able to implement defiantly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be best-of-breed? We will redefine the ability of aggregation to aggregate. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? A company that can transition fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash fiercely. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of transparent project management. We believe we know that if you matrix strategically then you may also enhance iteravely. Imagine a combination of Perl and Perl. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our innovative compliance but our capacity to revolutionize. We believe we know that it is better to unleash mega-efficiently than to synergize holistically. The capability to extend proactively leads to the aptitude to streamline mega-intuitively. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? We will enlarge our power to upgrade without decreasing our capacity to evolve. What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? We have come to know that if you syndicate perfectly then you may also exploit virtually. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to facilitate.