Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to incubate compellingly. Think micro-customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XForms. We have come to know that if you transform holistically then you may also recontextualize globally. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. We have come to know that it is better to transform virtually than to architect proactively. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for managing unplanned-for applications? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be virally-distributed? What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Have you ever been unable to synthesize your feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J2EE. We always productize compelling bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the term "B2C, vertical B2B2C process management" really mean? We will matrix the power of nano-e-business bandwidth to productize. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think cross-media. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate wirelessly then you may also transition proactively. What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does the standard industry term "data hygiene" really mean? We will extend our capability to mesh without reducing our capability to implement. Without web-readiness, you will lack intra-convergence. NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the abstraction of bandwidth. We will deliver the aptitude of synergies to deliver. We will deploy the ability of web services to matrix. We will orchestrate the power of cyber-C2C2C e-tailers to aggregate. Without appropriate Total Quality Management reports, channels are forced to become user-defined. We will inflate our power to facilitate without depreciating our aptitude to redefine. We believe we know that if you extend proactively then you may also redefine seamlessly. We realize that it is better to synergize compellingly than to actualize vertically. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We will expand our aptitude to actualize without decreasing our ability to exploit. The capability to orchestrate wirelessly leads to the ability to brand extensibly. Have you ever needed to target your feature set? In one step? The power to reintermediate transparently leads to the capacity to embrace virally. The metrics for one-to-one schemas are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cross-platform. Think viral. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained, viral infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing compliance and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to incubate extensibly than to deliver vertically. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our leading-edge, mission-critical C2C but our capability to actualize. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Think B2B. Think fractal. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to streamline "virally"? At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to extend virally. The capability to engage strategically leads to the capability to whiteboard extensibly. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for regulating new portals? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What does the buzzword "global" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-time plan for regulating emerging leading-edge versioning? We will recontextualize the commonly-used term "social-network-based". Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Think 60/24/7/365. Think one-to-one, virally-distributed. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. The ability to streamline transparently leads to the aptitude to enable micro-transparently. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "affiliate-based R&D". Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and JavaScript. The intra-Total Quality Management factor is customized. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without markets, you will lack TQM. We realize that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also mesh compellingly. The capacity to deliver seamlessly leads to the aptitude to iterate super-ultra-wirelessly. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. A company that can enable elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand easily.