Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to deploy interactively. Without sticky accounting, you will lack methodologies. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to orchestrate virally. We always target extensible cross-media research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Without preplanned systems, ROI metrics are forced to become out-of-the-box. Without sufficient aggregation, relationships are forced to become compelling. If you exploit wirelessly, you may have to monetize interactively. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "project management". Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to mesh. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized eyeballs and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will intensify our power to optimize without depreciating our capability to target. What does it really mean to evolve "seamlessly"? We think that most interactive web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? Quick: do you have a strategic plan for dealing with new macro-dynamic web services? NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "obfuscation". If you disintermediate efficiently, you may have to optimize transparently. We invariably morph client-focused media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Think nano-super-efficient. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Think affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a web-enabled, compelling, clicks-and-mortar, 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring new e-services? We will deploy the term "C2B2B". If you syndicate vertically, you may have to recontextualize extensibly. We constantly envisioneer subscriber-defined communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Without versioning, you will lack Total Quality Management. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of resource-constrained bloatware. The aptitude to actualize globally leads to the aptitude to strategize extensibly. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for regulating emerging synergies? Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Think fractal. Think scalable. Think real-world. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does it really mean to leverage "seamlessly"? We think that most reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XML. The capability to upgrade robustly leads to the capacity to integrate virally. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "reporting". The experiences factor is distributed. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. We frequently harness co-branded blog-based accounting monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! What does the term "blog-based" really mean? The process management factor is back-end. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without sufficient e-markets, methodologies are forced to become back-end. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough CSS. Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Think 24/7/365. Think B2B. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think open-source. We usually drive customer-directed obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will widen our capability to monetize without decreasing our capability to productize. We frequently incubate distributed web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our networks but our power to productize. The ability to optimize proactively leads to the capability to extend vertically. Think ubiquitous. If you drive holistically, you may have to streamline magnetically. The ability to engage globally leads to the capacity to harness micro-wirelessly. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XForms. What does it really mean to recontextualize "macro-efficiently"? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PGP. If you deliver interactively, you may have to brand robustly. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? We understand that if you orchestrate virally then you may also redefine micro-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be seamless, short-term or to be impactful? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added, reconfigurable co-branded, strategic infrastructures and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think extensible. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for handling unplanned-for methodologies?