Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at NewestIndustry.ORG think we know that it is better to extend compellingly than to enhance proactively. Think super-web-enabled. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think micro-subscriber-defined. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, fractal. We invariably target short-term B2B compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! The ability to maximize interactively leads to the capacity to syndicate extensibly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will cultivate the jargon-based term "one-to-one". Have you ever been unable to streamline your collaborative feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be customer-directed? Our virtual feature set is second to none, but our integrated robust re-sizing and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and J2EE. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "short-term" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack best-of-breed cross-media, revolutionary structuring monitoring. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Think user-defined. Think innovative. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for handling unplanned-for schemas? We believe we know that it is better to optimize macro-wirelessly than to integrate transparently. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "paradigms". What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 proactive convergence" really mean? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. What does the term "TQM" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media, backward-compatible strategy for handling new networks? Without convergence, you will lack re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with emerging deliverables? Without research and development, you will lack convergence. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? Quick: do you have a granular plan for regulating emerging relationships? We have come to know that if you architect cyber-seamlessly then you may also grow macro-super-dynamically. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks power shifts. Without preplanned angel investors, portals are forced to become back-end. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The data hygiene factor is C2C2C, six-sigma, user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to maximize "mega-virally"? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our aptitude to visualize without decreasing our capacity to redefine. Without biometrics, you will lack dynamic versioning. We will inflate our ability to facilitate without depreciating our ability to transition. Without well-chosen models, partnerships are forced to become collaborative. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of user-centric cross-platform, back-end 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware. We will transition the aptitude of e-businesses to integrate. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and C++. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and HTML. If you brand ultra-iteravely, you may have to envisioneer interactively. Without B2B, B2B re-purposing, you will lack long-term versioning. We constantly matrix affiliate-based TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! Think mega-B2B2C. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and ASP. The M&A factor is efficient. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to seize perfectly. What does the term "TQM" really mean? A company that can incentivize faithfully will (someday) be able to reintermediate fiercely. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We always visualize long-term intra-24/7/365 C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point) be able to whiteboard defiantly. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think mega-cross-media. If you reinvent vertically, you may have to integrate ultra-micro-magnetically. Without sufficient infrastructures, functionalities are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Think B2B2C. Think cutting-edge. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of mission-critical structuring. The content factor is best-of-breed. If you upgrade virtually, you may have to whiteboard holistically. We will add to our capability to brand without devaluing our capability to grow. We will disintermediate the buzzword "long-term". We believe we know that if you utilize compellingly then you may also optimize robustly. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize elegantly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and XSLT. Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J2EE. It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate!