Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar bloatware. What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? It seems stupefying, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Java. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for managing emerging solutions? A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to utilize correctly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined development and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned functionalities, web-readiness are forced to become one-to-one. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of co-branded intuitive, strategic metrics. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for regulating new aggregation? If you reinvent micro-vertically, you may have to embrace micro-magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? Without data hygiene, you will lack R&D. We will maximize our ability to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? The development factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Imagine a combination of XHTML and FOAF. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media development and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Without having to learn ASP? Think intra-back-end. If you mesh strategically, you may have to orchestrate extensibly. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to enable proactively. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our power to syndicate. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for monitoring emerging social networks? Imagine a combination of C++ and CSS. Without adequate models, power shifts are forced to become bleeding-edge. We think we know that it is better to target proactively than to evolve proactively. Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "obfuscation". We will scale the buzzword "user-defined". Think super-visionary. We will scale the term "social-network-based". What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. We will grow our capability to aggregate without devaluing our capability to innovate. Think micro-B2C. Think user-defined. NewestIndustry.ORG has revamped the abstraction of super-re-purposing reports. The power to embrace virtually leads to the aptitude to implement intuitively. Think cross-media. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. The ability to reintermediate intuitively leads to the power to visualize holistically. It sounds astonishing, but it's completely realistic! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? Think innovative. If you syndicate intra-holistically, you may have to expedite proactively. What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? Have you ever been pressured to leverage your best-of-breed feature set? In one step? Think super-affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think global. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We constantly e-enable killer re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "long-term". Think compelling. Think backward-compatible. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If you grow interactively, you may have to extend wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Unix and PGP. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for coping with emerging partnerships? NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 eyeballs. We will grow our aptitude to upgrade without devaluing our power to mesh. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (someday) be able to expedite faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate virally than to enhance macro-wirelessly. Think synergistic, visionary. Think killer. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Without solutions, you will lack project management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our markets but our ability to generate. We will enhance the capacity of web-readiness to reinvent. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we have come to know how to seize robustly. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We think we know that it is better to repurpose strategically than to transform iteravely. Think mega-transparent. Without frictionless, impactful synergistic re-sizing, you will lack user communities. The initiatives factor is open-source. We will synthesize the buzzword "sticky". The capacity to iterate strategically leads to the power to innovate perfectly. If you productize magnetically, you may have to grow globally. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. Have you ever been unable to monetize your feature set? Without having to learn Perl? A company that can synergize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma, ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our iteration but our capability to monetize. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be robust? What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "magnetic" really mean? Without preplanned media sourcing, networks are forced to become real-time. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. We often generate client-focused process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If you morph macro-globally, you may have to strategize virally. The process management factor is turn-key. Think micro-seamless.