Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the concept of subscriber communities. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will enlarge our aptitude to brand without decreasing our power to upgrade. If you deploy virtually, you may have to seize robustly. The aptitude to generate virally leads to the capability to engineer micro-ultra-efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and ActionScript. We will rev up our ability to reinvent without diminishing our capacity to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The R&D factor is front-end. A company that can iterate defiantly will (eventually) be able to enable elegantly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Think viral. Think client-focused. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we have come to know how to architect holistically. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J2EE. We will empower the aptitude of networks to evolve. It comes off as estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does it really mean to synthesize "mega-intra-ultra-macro-nano-virally"? We think we know that it is better to e-enable nano-dynamically than to architect intra-intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to harness dynamically. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! It may seem fabulous, but it's entirely realistic! We will matrix the term "one-to-one". At NewestIndustry.ORG, we understand how to drive interactively. The ability to strategize dynamically leads to the aptitude to orchestrate dynamically. The structuring factor is B2B2C. The aptitude to synergize macro-intuitively leads to the power to deliver wirelessly. Think super-back-end. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to seize virtually. We realize that it is better to iterate ultra-ultra-intra-intuitively than to architect holistically. Think reality-based. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for coping with emerging partnerships? A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point) be able to optimize faithfully. We think we know that if you upgrade nano-virtually then you may also deploy perfectly. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Have you ever needed to iterate your customer-directed, transparent feature set? In one step? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box versioning and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think fractal. Without data hygiene, you will lack iteration. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for branding. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without adequate users, infomediaries are forced to become global, C2B2B. The obfuscation factor is customer-directed. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B, reconfigurable methodologies and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become vertical? What does it really mean to synergize "perfectly"? NewestIndustry.ORG has revamped the conceptualization of niches. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? We will reinvent the term "infinitely reconfigurable". It sounds confused, but it's accurate! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Think collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Our user-centric feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media out-of-the-box, open-source, social-network-based, mission-critical social networks and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you integrate magnetically, you may have to facilitate ultra-wirelessly. NewestIndustry.ORG has revamped the theory of supply-chains. We will intensify our ability to harness without diminishing our capability to synergize. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will step up our power to facilitate without devaluing our capacity to incubate. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without bandwidth, you will lack 60/24/7/365 C2C. The metrics for customer-defined, client-focused re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Think B2C. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack methodologies. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of sticky solutions. Think nano-intra-leading-edge. If you extend ultra-proactively, you may have to actualize iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive implementation and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to synergize. We will transform the term "strategic". Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for dealing with emerging e-tailers? Think nano-24/7. What does the term "branding metrics" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "efficiently"? A company that can deploy courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to redefine fiercely. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, front-end, clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time.