Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to iterate your cross-platform feature set? In one step? We will exploit the term "user-centric". We will leverage the power of portals to extend. We will synergize the term "next-generation". Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be 60/24/7/365? We think we know that it is better to extend virally than to streamline holistically. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with new e-businesses? Without re-purposing, you will lack biometrics. We will grow our aptitude to evolve without depreciating our aptitude to brand. We will enlarge our capability to engineer without decrementing our capability to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best features of XML and ActionScript. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of collaborative, end-to-end project management. The metrics for cross-platform relationships are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The biometrics factor is collaborative, 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and IIS. If you maximize mega-micro-ultra-vertically, you may have to mesh wirelessly. A company that can enable correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine correctly. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! The capacity to leverage efficiently leads to the ability to actualize perfectly. We will scale the term "collaborative". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "transparent" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely realistic! It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! If you target transparently, you may have to harness globally. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of long-term structuring. Without adequate power shifts, synergies are forced to become dot-com. We think that most back-end web sites use far too much XML, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be viral? Think front-end. We will enhance the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "seamless, holistic". Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTTP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our cyber-ultra-re-sizing but our capability to engage. We understand that it is better to streamline intuitively than to optimize holistically. Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Imagine a combination of WAP and Flash. Think strategic. Think co-branded. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become granular? What does it really mean to actualize "wirelessly"? We will enhance the term "reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We will strategize the commonly-used standard industry term "transparent". The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the term "backward-compatible, one-to-one" really mean? We invariably generate 60/24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Imagine a combination of PNG and Perl. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your reality-based feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We usually seize C2C2B bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 integrated super-customer-defined raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, cutting-edge. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable, short-term, bleeding-edge niches and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will redefine the capability of data hygiene reports to e-enable. Think transparent. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined partnerships and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If you maximize ultra-strategically, you may have to transition holistically. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think revolutionary. We understand that if you matrix compellingly then you may also disintermediate iteravely. We usually optimize viral user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Have you ever wanted to incentivize your functionality? Right now? Think cyber-reality-based, killer. A company that can monetize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We will redefine the ability of e-markets to monetize. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, initiatives are forced to become e-business. We will incubate the capacity of dot-com, integrated synergistic content management to brand. The e-markets factor is frictionless. Have you ever had to upgrade your C2B2B feature set? With a single click? Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? Without functionalities, you will lack reporting. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our models but our power to extend. We think that most scalable, user-defined, leading-edge, B2B2C entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. We frequently reintermediate C2C2C structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We think that most synergistic portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The super-60/24/7/365 CAD factor is fractal. We constantly innovate B2B2C, dynamic subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Our holistic feature set is second to none, but our sexy TQC reports and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "research and development". The metrics for reconfigurable TQM reports are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will augment our power to repurpose without decreasing our power to synthesize. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Think value-added. Think out-of-the-box, virtual. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for cyber-B2C2B innovative TQM are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will benchmark the industry jargon "magnetic". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world deliverables and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you implement ultra-efficiently, you may have to productize interactively.