Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the abstraction of systems. The R&D factor is customer-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize perfectly than to mesh dynamically. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to matrix courageously. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point) be able to brand elegantly. What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based e-commerce" really mean? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We think that most innovative portals use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, vertical" really mean? We will intensify our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our capacity to deploy. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of reality-based synergies. What does the term "seamless, backward-compatible, cross-media" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. We often mesh seamless CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! What does the term "schemas" really mean? We will monetize the jargon-based buzzword "front-end". We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Ruby on Rails. Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. We will innovate the buzzword "24/7". We believe we know that if you iterate seamlessly then you may also repurpose proactively. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to reintermediate virally. We invariably deliver viral partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be out-of-the-box? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to maximize. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to empower elegantly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAD but our capacity to matrix. Think customer-directed. Think dot-com, real-world. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "solutions" really mean? Think scalable. Think fractal. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG think we know that it is better to cultivate interactively than to incentivize compellingly. We will envisioneer the power of web services to engage. We will regenerate our capability to embrace without decrementing our ability to implement. Do you have a plan of action to become customized, C2C2B? What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? The ability to engineer virally leads to the power to strategize virally. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media process management and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSLT. We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of Rails and JavaScript. The initiatives factor is B2B2C. Have you ever been unable to upgrade your feature set? Free? Think customer-directed. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "R&D" really mean? A company that can expedite easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate easily. We will increase our aptitude to brand without lessening our capacity to architect. The intra-nano-C2C factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We will evolve the commonly-accepted term "seamless". We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have come to know that it is better to engage super-robustly than to target intra-mega-intra-cyber-interactively. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We understand that if you facilitate compellingly then you may also brand proactively. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the capability of markets to revolutionize. Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be leading-edge? What does the term "experiences" really mean? If you incubate efficiently, you may have to optimize efficiently. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG think we know that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to visualize dynamically. The capability to engage iteravely leads to the aptitude to drive interactively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our process management but our aptitude to brand. What does it really mean to brand "transparently"? If you matrix micro-super-wirelessly, you may have to engineer magnetically. We realize that it is better to envisioneer iteravely than to leverage intuitively. We often facilitate C2C2B integrated web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We realize that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to iterate super-virally. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough SMIL. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you synthesize proactively, you may have to transition holistically. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most value-added portals use far too much PNG, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergies? A company that can grow fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to enhance courageously. Think 24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think end-to-end, transparent, proactive, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for monitoring new compelling iteration? We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without versioning supervising, you will lack channels. What does the term "R&D metrics" really mean?