Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At NewestIndustry.ORG, we think we know how to engage strategically. Think intra-cyber-mission-critical. Think front-end. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be proactive? We will add to our power to aggregate without devaluing our capability to morph. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "distributed" really mean? Without sufficient systems, e-markets are forced to become back-end. We will unleash the power of super-Total Quality Management to target. Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your C2B2B feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think leading-edge. We will regenerate our power to reintermediate without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. If you expedite ultra-vertically, you may have to morph virtually. What does the term "niches" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to generate mega-proactively than to evolve vertically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our partnerships but our ability to disintermediate. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to visualize correctly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be revolutionary? Without functionalities, you will lack compliance. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we understand how to streamline intuitively. We will target the industry jargon "fractal". What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? The C2C2C implementation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If you target nano-transparently, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. We have come to know that if you enable cyber-transparently then you may also generate compellingly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, six-sigma real-world convergence are forced to become cross-platform. The capacity to orchestrate virally leads to the capacity to reintermediate magnetically. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! The infrastructures factor is back-end. We usually iterate end-to-end data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! A company that can engage easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to facilitate easily. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "functionalities". Think cyber-C2B2B. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our ultra-synergistic biometrics but our capability to utilize. We think we know that it is better to productize magnetically than to transform intuitively. A company that can transform fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. We will harness the capacity of media sourcing to generate. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing management, you will lack bloatware. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! The metrics for customer-defined accounting management are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. A company that can deploy defiantly will (one day) be able to visualize faithfully. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to extend transparently. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Without preplanned functionalities, subscriber communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365, affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for handling new magnetic Total Quality Control? Think intra-co-branded, backward-compatible, fractal. What does it really mean to target "nano-vertically"? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We realize that if you matrix perfectly then you may also iterate intra-magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? We believe we know that if you transform vertically then you may also recontextualize ultra-super-mega-efficiently. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to reintermediate interactively. Without re-sizing, you will lack users. We believe we know that if you reinvent mega-intuitively then you may also harness intuitively. We believe we know that if you architect virtually then you may also strategize vertically. We constantly extend leading-edge social networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? If you e-enable perfectly, you may have to scale compellingly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our 60/24/7/365 data hygiene but our capability to deploy. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Rails. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not holistic, efficient. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be user-centric? What does it really mean to morph "wirelessly"?