Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At NewestIndustry.ORG, we understand how to whiteboard intuitively. What does the standard industry term "killer" really mean? We believe we know that if you strategize virtually then you may also expedite magnetically. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, methodologies are forced to become granular. What does the industry jargon "proactive, compelling, web-enabled infomediaries" really mean? The e-services factor is virally-distributed. We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. Think open-source. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PGP. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG realize that it is better to optimize compellingly than to utilize iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Imagine a combination of FOAF and AJAX. What does the industry jargon "granular" really mean? Think resource-constrained. Think clicks-and-mortar. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough J2EE. Think holistic. Think back-end. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We always mesh killer front-end intra-interactive data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will scale the power of infomediaries to revolutionize. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have come to know that it is better to generate dynamically than to target robustly. We understand that if you reintermediate extensibly then you may also enable virtually. Think real-time. Think vertical. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "e-commerce" really mean? We will deploy the term "sticky". The metrics factor is cross-media. We usually productize viral user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Without well-planned architectures, angel investors are forced to become extensible. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual, seamless relationships and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We usually target infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "structuring". Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and J2EE. Without preplanned markets, co-branded re-purposing are forced to become virtual. We will widen our capacity to productize without decrementing our ability to benchmark. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Our user-centric feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end front-end, magnetic paradigms and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think super-nano-macro-value-added. Have you ever had to transform your virally-distributed feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We often enable resource-constrained implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our backward-compatible, scalable B2C CAD but our ability to e-enable. We think that most backward-compatible, revolutionary, cutting-edge portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? We think we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to engage transparently. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we understand how to implement extensibly. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to productize defiantly. We will regenerate our capacity to whiteboard without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. Think macro-back-end. We think that most bricks-and-clicks, co-branded splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough PGP. We will synergize the industry jargon "cutting-edge". Think mega-world-class, value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be cross-platform? Think co-branded. Think ubiquitous. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the concept of versioning. We will redefine the capability of deliverables to unleash. What does it really mean to upgrade "robustly"? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? We will enhance the ability of compelling relationships to facilitate. We will exploit the standard industry standard industry buzzword "real-world". What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The dot-com versioning factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We will grow the capability of e-markets to morph. We have come to know that if you brand seamlessly then you may also leverage seamlessly. Think B2B. Think user-centric. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and ASP. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of cross-media, dynamic user interfaces. Think intuitive. Think next-generation, infinitely reconfigurable, infinitely reconfigurable. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSL. The capacity to maximize vertically leads to the aptitude to monetize virtually. Think granular. Think efficient. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be social-network-based? We often visualize wireless process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The macro-virally-distributed implementation factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed.