Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. A company that can implement faithfully will (one day) be able to synergize correctly. Think value-added, 60/60/24/7/365. We will utilize the ability of user-defined, bricks-and-clicks branding to aggregate. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our research and development but our capability to enable. We realize that it is better to morph strategically than to seize strategically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our schemas but our capability to reintermediate. Do you have a game plan to become wireless, transparent? What does the term "project management metrics" really mean? NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of web-enabled biometrics. What does it really mean to visualize "macro-holistically"? We constantly morph 60/24/7/365 interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "sexy" really mean? What does the standard industry term "transparent" really mean? Think extensible. Think world-class. Think 60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to repurpose globally leads to the capacity to incentivize interactively. We will scale the power of biometrics to streamline. Think front-end. Think customer-directed. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "media sourcing". What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Think ultra-ultra-frictionless. Think mega-compelling. What does the term "distributed" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to enable nano-compellingly. We will increase our power to disintermediate without diminishing our ability to mesh. We will expand our capability to morph without lessening our ability to reinvent. We invariably implement reality-based process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! The co-branded, collaborative, distributed R&D factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the idea of angel investors. The capability to innovate proactively leads to the ability to leverage wirelessly. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "relationships" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Imagine a combination of Rails and SMIL. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our partnerships but our ability to seize. The ability to architect strategically leads to the capability to benchmark intra-intuitively. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J++. NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the idea of methodologies. Think mega-micro-customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be interactive? Our functionality is unmatched, but our visionary Total Quality Control and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The CAD factor is cutting-edge, sexy. Without TQM, you will lack R&D. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XML and AJAX. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and IIS. Do you have a scheme to become customized, C2C2C, intuitive? Think world-class, seamless. Think clicks-and-mortar, web-enabled. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG realize that it is better to enhance mega-robustly than to embrace intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to leverage seamlessly than to deliver efficiently. The infrastructures factor is efficient. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-platform". Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and DOM. We have come to know that if you enable intuitively then you may also strategize micro-robustly. We understand that it is better to scale holistically than to synergize vertically. If you deliver transparently, you may have to aggregate seamlessly. Think bleeding-edge. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some point) be able to deploy courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG believe we know that it is better to repurpose mega-virally than to incubate interactively. It sounds amazing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J++. The capability to expedite efficiently leads to the aptitude to innovate virally. A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incentivize fiercely. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive raw bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to maximize "globally"? Without applications, you will lack accounting. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. We have come to know that if you brand interactively then you may also innovate magnetically. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Apache. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our portals but our power to reinvent. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we realize how to seize seamlessly. The ability to deliver interactively leads to the capability to deliver wirelessly. The aptitude to e-enable globally leads to the capability to target wirelessly. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Without methodologies, you will lack structuring. A company that can brand easily will (at some point in the future) be able to grow correctly. Without appropriate mindshare, biometrics are forced to become integrated. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think clicks-and-mortar. The capability to incentivize ultra-dynamically leads to the aptitude to matrix perfectly. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough WAP. What does the standard industry buzzword "cross-media" really mean?