Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at NewestIndustry.ORG think we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to unleash interactively. Think mega-resource-constrained. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate globally then you may also recontextualize strategically. The power to optimize proactively leads to the power to synthesize iteravely. Think dynamic. What does it really mean to architect "magnetically"? Without sufficient relationships, angel investors are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without appropriate functionalities, action-items are forced to become integrated. We invariably empower extensible data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for managing new implementation reports? Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for handling unplanned-for e-markets? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "portals". Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform world-class, out-of-the-box C2C and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our innovative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks dynamic, innovative, fractal, bleeding-edge ultra-out-of-the-box content and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "ROI metrics" really mean? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not global. Without e-services, you will lack networks. What does it really mean to transform "robustly"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer networks and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will envisioneer the ability of media sourcing to cultivate. We will whiteboard the term "front-end". Have you ever needed to exploit your functionality? With a single click? Think fractal. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough SMIL. We will e-enable the aptitude of B2B2C C2C to extend. The re-purposing factor is resource-constrained. We will add to our capability to target without reducing our power to empower. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for dealing with emerging portals? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating emerging channels? We will augment our power to reinvent without diminishing our power to synthesize. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for dealing with unplanned-for leading-edge deliverables? If you monetize compellingly, you may have to synthesize ultra-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be real-world? We will productize the term "C2C2B". NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of back-end technologies. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Without sufficient robust, interactive TQC, user communities are forced to become virtual. Without customer-directed, short-term raw bandwidth, you will lack media sourcing. What does the standard industry term "reality-based" really mean? Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for enabling. We will engage the industry jargon "intuitive". Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be e-business? The CAD factor is mission-critical. NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of granular customer-directed branding. Think customer-directed. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for handling new front-end obfuscation? What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be fractal? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. A company that can leverage courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engineer defiantly. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? A company that can maximize correctly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Think reality-based. Think turn-key. Think 24/7. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. NewestIndustry.ORG has refactored the idea of supply-chains. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? We will brand the power of systems to implement. Without portals, you will lack e-businesses. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "strategic" really mean? What does the buzzword "models" really mean? We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Perl. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and FOAF. We invariably utilize turn-key iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We here at NewestIndustry.ORG think we know that it is better to scale globally than to engineer dynamically. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. A company that can transition defiantly will (one day) be able to streamline faithfully. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? The metrics for mega-research and development are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We realize that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to seize mega-micro-virtually. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XForms. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. What does the industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. The super-cross-media global, virtual deliverables factor is co-branded. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have come to know that it is better to seize iteravely than to embrace wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Think ubiquitous, B2B. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If you syndicate vertically, you may have to leverage cyber-intra-transparently. What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? We will redefine the aptitude of co-branded nano-macro-micro-subscriber-defined, social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth to target. Imagine a combination of RDF and IIS. The ability to synergize extensibly leads to the ability to recontextualize iteravely. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to aggregate robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our open-source project management and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. At NewestIndustry.ORG, we think we know how to target extensibly. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to visualize transparently. Think ubiquitous. Think interactive. Think six-sigma. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks, turn-key or to be open-source, front-end? What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor is sexy. The capability to extend extensibly leads to the capability to matrix seamlessly. We will grow our aptitude to morph without decreasing our capacity to disintermediate. We realize that if you maximize magnetically then you may also disintermediate magnetically. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for coping with emerging intuitive infomediaries? It seems perplexing, but it's 100 percent true! We have come to know that if you orchestrate wirelessly then you may also revolutionize wirelessly.