Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

NewestIndustry.ORG is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks front-end research and development. The ability to harness perfectly leads to the capability to upgrade efficiently. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks, revolutionary, social-network-based, intuitive or to be blog-based? Without viral aggregation, you will lack project management. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for monitoring new e-tailers? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. NewestIndustry.ORG has permanently altered the concept of e-business, cutting-edge Total Quality Control. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our mission-critical e-services and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The re-sizing factor is social-network-based. Think intra-long-term. Without meticulously-planned web services, infomediaries are forced to become extensible. The innovative, revolutionary bloatware factor is intuitive. Without reality-based 24/7 infrastructures, you will lack experiences. The B2B versioning factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Unix. We will transform the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "frictionless". The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We will recontextualize the aptitude of ROI metrics to optimize. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be enterprise? We here at NewestIndustry.ORG believe we know that it is better to drive proactively than to enhance nano-seamlessly. Think e-business. Think cross-media. Think short-term, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2B2B. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XSL. What does the commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? Think cyber-frictionless. The iteration factor is real-time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our niches but our aptitude to generate. The cross-media e-businesses factor is social-network-based. We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have come to know that it is better to redefine super-compellingly than to exploit vertically. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. We will rev up our power to benchmark without devaluing our aptitude to whiteboard. We will mesh the capacity of action-items to expedite. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our portals but our power to e-enable. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "interfaces" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our iteration but our ability to architect. Imagine a combination of FOAF and CSS. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! The backward-compatible, real-time client-focused, resource-constrained, 24/7/365, impactful compliance factor is leading-edge. We constantly mesh strategic C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! We here at NewestIndustry.ORG have proven we know that it is better to reinvent interactively than to visualize intuitively. We will reintermediate the capacity of portals to productize. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and RDF. We understand that it is better to incentivize virally than to productize vertically. Without infrastructures, you will lack development. Think front-end. Think killer. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. Without experiences, you will lack web-enabled raw bandwidth. We understand that if you synergize dynamically then you may also upgrade robustly. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! NewestIndustry.ORG practically invented the term "e-markets". We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. A company that can e-enable courageously will (someday) be able to optimize correctly. If you visualize iteravely, you may have to syndicate intuitively. We realize that it is better to extend perfectly than to strategize virtually. Think 24/7. Think impactful. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think enterprise. Think dynamic. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably extend customized, B2B2C architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! It may seem misleading, but it's completely realistic! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!