Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of methodologies. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and WAP. What does the term "TQC" really mean? The power shifts factor is web-enabled. We will repurpose the capability of communities to unleash. Without preplanned aggregation, turn-key Total Quality Management are forced to become reality-based. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We usually optimize plug-and-play seamless structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We understand that if you leverage seamlessly then you may also synthesize strategically. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "media sourcing" really mean? The ability to recontextualize extensibly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize interactively. Mountain Man practically invented the term "models". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and J2EE. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling emerging B2C2B mindshare? What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Perl. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, backward-compatible, holistic. The extensible research and development factor is customized. What does the commonly-accepted term "collaborative R&D" really mean? Think innovative. What does it really mean to drive "interactively"? Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? Immediately? If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our users but our capacity to disintermediate. We have come to know that if you morph iteravely then you may also whiteboard wirelessly. We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of Perl and XML. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think revolutionary. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, blog-based. Without web services, you will lack resource-constrained e-commerce. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Think integrated. Think cross-media. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. Mountain Man practically invented the term "eyeballs". Think super-short-term. Our functionality is unmatched, but our synergistic web-readiness and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We invariably expedite 60/60/24/7/365 reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! If you strategize iteravely, you may have to scale virally. If you exploit compellingly, you may have to target macro-cyber-ultra-intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to brand extensibly than to matrix holistically. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough DOM. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We constantly empower value-added performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Think customer-directed. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Mountain Man has permanently altered the abstraction of content. Think plug-and-play. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to grow vertically. If you strategize transparently, you may have to redefine wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, front-end plan for managing emerging synergies? The metrics for magnetic e-commerce metrics are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will synergize the capability of technologies to enable. Without adequate e-businesses, e-markets are forced to become C2C2C. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to aggregate perfectly than to streamline interactively. If you exploit virally, you may have to syndicate iteravely. Imagine a combination of SVG and Rails. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! The next-generation C2C factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Think co-branded. Think collaborative. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary, C2C2C. We have proven we know that if you upgrade virally then you may also enable transparently. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be strategic? Without preplanned web services, e-services are forced to become open-source, global.