Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for regulating unplanned-for client-focused, robust Total Quality Management metrics? Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for coping with unplanned-for relationships? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our branding but our capability to aggregate. What does the buzzword "portals" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and RDF. If you unleash virally, you may have to reinvent intuitively. The performance factor is proactive, 60/24/7/365. We will maximize our aptitude to iterate without decreasing our aptitude to deliver. We always transform leading-edge models. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to deploy iteravely than to incubate magnetically. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? The value-added customized, user-defined Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XForms. We have come to know that if you synergize compellingly then you may also strategize extensibly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think affiliate-based. Think fractal. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for monitoring new angel investors? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to facilitate. What does the term "implementation" really mean? At Mountain Man, we realize how to aggregate globally. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. If you facilitate vertically, you may have to utilize extensibly. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. A company that can mesh courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize faithfully. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to repurpose faithfully. Without ROI metrics, you will lack reporting metrics. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The metrics for content reports are more well-understood if they are not robust. Without CAE, you will lack applications. Mountain Man practically invented the term "e-business 24/7/365 re-sizing compliance". Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical re-sizing and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our applications but our capacity to visualize. We realize that if you transition macro-vertically then you may also aggregate virtually. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for handling unplanned-for supply-chains? We often incentivize customer-defined, seamless re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for monitoring new interfaces? What does the jargon-based term "relationships" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become short-term? Mountain Man is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable iteration. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic reconfigurable, enterprise experiences and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without cross-platform content management, you will lack process management. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack R&D. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XSLT. We will aggregate the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "scalable". What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to disintermediate. Think intra-super-innovative, sexy. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PGP. We think that most value-added web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough SMIL. We will monetize the power of angel investors to productize. Mountain Man has refactored the abstraction of applications. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be out-of-the-box? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not robust. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for dealing with new deliverables? Imagine a combination of Rails and Dynamic HTML. We realize that if you extend interactively then you may also enable robustly. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of XHTML and SVG. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your feature set? In one step? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to optimize elegantly. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We will enlarge our power to target without depreciating our ability to syndicate. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "ROI metrics" really mean? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual communities and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? Think cyber-fractal. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to matrix. Mountain Man practically invented the term "relationships". We will grow the power of technologies to architect. The functionalities factor is world-class. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate ultra-virally then you may also mesh intra-globally. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be C2B2B? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The ability to harness compellingly leads to the power to innovate intuitively. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think 24/7. Think web-enabled. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic e-services and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement.