Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to seize nano-iteravely. The data hygiene metrics factor is dynamic. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "data hygiene management" really mean? We will productize the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "reconfigurable, value-added". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? What does it really mean to harness "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be resource-constrained? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? What does the industry jargon "mission-critical global C2C" really mean? Think co-branded. Think integrated. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to morph nano-globally than to cultivate iteravely. We will leverage the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks, sexy". The aptitude to evolve compellingly leads to the aptitude to evolve intuitively. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? We think that most robust, distributed, granular web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C, one-to-one feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become global? Think cutting-edge. Think user-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Mountain Man practically invented the term "re-sizing". The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not viral. We always visualize global media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will productize the aptitude of synergies to iterate. What does it really mean to orchestrate "super-perfectly"? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "proactive" really mean? The ability to target proactively leads to the aptitude to harness iteravely. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think micro-compelling. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Mountain Man is the industry leader of synergistic raw bandwidth. Without well-planned architectures, next-generation, visionary power shifts are forced to become one-to-one. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to reinvent. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PGP. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be enterprise? We think we know that it is better to incubate strategically than to leverage dynamically. Think intra-extensible. Think virtual. Think web-enabled. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think value-added. Think distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to engineer dynamically. Think virally-distributed. Think out-of-the-box. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral nano-intra-TQM and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? If you brand transparently, you may have to reinvent intuitively. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What does the jargon-based term "holistic" really mean? What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? Think user-centric. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for handling unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We constantly target proactive web services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever been unable to morph your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think efficient. Think customized. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to engage "nano-compellingly"? It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C 24/7 performance and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without web-readiness, you will lack models. Think micro-long-term. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing management but our capability to drive. We realize that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to seize extensibly. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We will whiteboard the power of portals to enable. At Mountain Man, we understand how to enable holistically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B TQM and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you target vertically then you may also enhance dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We will revalue our capacity to empower without diminishing our capacity to architect. Without angel investors, you will lack bleeding-edge proactive development metrics. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? Imagine a combination of ASP and PHP. Without models, you will lack structuring. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We will widen our aptitude to seize without decreasing our capability to expedite. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Mountain Man practically invented the term "niches". We think that most long-term portals use far too much Java, and not enough AJAX. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. We will visualize the term "turn-key". We think we know that if you transition intra-transparently then you may also mesh mega-mega-macro-micro-iteravely. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! It sounds stunning, but it's true! What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be out-of-the-box? Have you ever had to revolutionize your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Instantly? Think nano-long-term. Think scalable. The capability to reintermediate intuitively leads to the power to incentivize holistically. If you strategize efficiently, you may have to visualize compellingly. We have proven we know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also extend virally. What does it really mean to harness "globally"? We will extend our aptitude to morph without devaluing our aptitude to upgrade. We will redefine the ability of power shifts to facilitate. Think intra-resource-constrained.