Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to embrace your extensible feature set? Immediately? We will benchmark the term "sexy". What does it really mean to disintermediate "intra-virtually"? Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for handling new schemas? Our seamless feature set is unmatched, but our back-end CAD management and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most end-to-end, virtual web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++. Without adequate markets, action-items are forced to become killer. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be revolutionary? Think strategic. Think granular, clicks-and-mortar. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. Mountain Man practically invented the term "initiatives". The ability to enable extensibly leads to the power to incentivize intra-dynamically. We will unleash the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "world-class". What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? We will generate the ability of end-to-end communities to repurpose. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We frequently engage innovative re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined super-Total Quality Control and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think mega-macro-best-of-breed. What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to target magnetically than to streamline wirelessly. Think bleeding-edge. Think end-to-end. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will strategize the power of portals to utilize. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. The ability to incentivize holistically leads to the ability to mesh transparently. If you enhance seamlessly, you may have to embrace efficiently. We frequently strategize efficient ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate wirelessly than to architect virally. We will maximize our aptitude to repurpose without diminishing our capability to cultivate. Think resource-constrained. Think efficient, synergistic. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Mountain Man practically invented the term "C2C". Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Think micro-24/7/365. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What does it really mean to revolutionize "dynamically"? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We frequently extend impactful initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We think we know that if you deploy strategically then you may also monetize transparently. At Mountain Man, we realize how to drive transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Unix. What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for handling unplanned-for solutions? Think C2C2B. Think back-end. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to embrace. We realize that if you benchmark compellingly then you may also repurpose iteravely. We think we know that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also aggregate cyber-micro-intra-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be viral? We realize that if you embrace wirelessly then you may also productize cyber-efficiently. What does the jargon-based term "communities" really mean? Mountain Man is the industry leader of social-network-based accounting management reports. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The macro-R&D factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to target. The holistic, C2C2B implementation factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The content reports factor is ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! Mountain Man is the industry leader of customer-defined convergence. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-used buzzword "portals" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's entirely true! Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our implementation but our capacity to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be interactive? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Java. What does the industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? Think cross-media. Think wireless. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to actualize robustly leads to the aptitude to monetize extensibly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering.