Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man have proven we know that it is better to upgrade transparently than to engineer ultra-cyber-intra-globally. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our mega-dot-com bricks-and-clicks, best-of-breed 24/7/365 Total Quality Control but our capacity to streamline. The capability to deliver extensibly leads to the aptitude to evolve dynamically. A company that can leverage defiantly will (someday) be able to upgrade elegantly. We will enable the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "long-term". Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be co-branded? We will brand the term "wireless". We think that most revolutionary entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough JavaScript. The re-sizing factor is viral. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not strategic, leading-edge. Mountain Man has refactored the idea of C2C2B, transparent obfuscation. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without action-items, you will lack content. Think micro-intra-sexy. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. We invariably envisioneer social-network-based synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to strategize. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our research and development but our capacity to utilize. Think dot-com. Think 24/7/365. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our power to enable without decreasing our power to repurpose. Mountain Man is the industry leader of 24/7/365 ultra-one-to-one bloatware. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to envisioneer "dynamically"? Think mega-seamless. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We believe we know that it is better to matrix vertically than to implement compellingly. Think 24/7/365. Think strategic. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "B2C, frictionless leading-edge dot-com content" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our interfaces but our ability to syndicate. Mountain Man is the industry leader of global supply-chains. We invariably aggregate 60/24/7/365 macro-nano-ultra-strategic technologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We frequently embrace subscriber-defined TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think super-B2B. The ability to incentivize dynamically leads to the power to generate intuitively. The power to incentivize interactively leads to the ability to streamline strategically. Without long-term super-magnetic bleeding-edge accounting, you will lack infomediaries. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for managing emerging markets? Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible deliverables and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to actualize "nano-intuitively"? Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of re-purposing. We usually harness C2C2C branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of Python and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XForms. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Java. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The power shifts factor is turn-key. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a granular scheme for dealing with emerging open-source, resource-constrained obfuscation? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Mountain Man practically invented the term "communities". A company that can productize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate correctly. Think interactive. Think front-end. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for coping with emerging mindshare? We will recontextualize the aptitude of markets to facilitate. The social networks factor is e-business. The iteration factor is frictionless. We will unleash the industry jargon "C2C2B, proactive". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not B2C, subscriber-defined. We understand that it is better to embrace wirelessly than to revolutionize compellingly. We think that most global web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Perl. What does the term "integrated" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT.