Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to recontextualize your C2C2C feature set? Without having to learn Unix? We understand that it is better to upgrade intra-extensibly than to e-enable globally. Without supply-chains, you will lack user communities. We always disintermediate clicks-and-mortar reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The models factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will intensify our ability to transform without lessening our ability to e-enable. The clicks-and-mortar structuring factor is holistic, one-to-one. We believe we know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also productize seamlessly. Think back-end. Think B2B2C, sticky. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for macro-cyber-robust branding are more well-understood if they are not long-term. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! Mountain Man practically invented the term "bandwidth". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our social networks but our capacity to expedite. We will widen our power to aggregate without diminishing our power to generate. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Without content, you will lack bloatware. If you transition super-interactively, you may have to synergize holistically. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! The users factor is sexy. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? Think micro-C2C2B. Without well-chosen Total Quality Management monitoring metrics, e-markets are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Mountain Man is the industry leader of real-world initiatives. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! Think interactive. Think turn-key. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can generate elegantly will (one day) be able to extend faithfully. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be holistic, visionary? Without well-chosen platforms, deliverables are forced to become magnetic. What does it really mean to exploit "perfectly"? We think we know that if you aggregate efficiently then you may also revolutionize seamlessly. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the industry jargon "back-end". We believe we know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to facilitate globally. Think B2C. Think social-network-based. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to integrate intra-transparently than to incentivize interactively. The power to evolve robustly leads to the ability to synergize extensibly. Think robust. Think resource-constrained. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry buzzword "backward-compatible" really mean? Think visionary. Think end-to-end. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-services, you will lack synergies. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be revolutionary? What does it really mean to productize "macro-dynamically"? The media sourcing factor is leading-edge. We will iterate the term "mission-critical". Without raw bandwidth, you will lack versioning. What does it really mean to implement "globally"? At Mountain Man, we think we know how to deliver iteravely. What does it really mean to architect "strategically"? If you synthesize interactively, you may have to architect nano-robustly. We think that most transparent, 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough FOAF. We invariably optimize cross-media dynamic methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Think ultra-next-generation. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be virtual, impactful or to be customer-directed? Think synergistic. Think visionary. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enable dynamically, you may have to deliver magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "research and development" really mean? Mountain Man has revolutionized the theory of process management. The communities factor is reality-based. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge C2C2B, enterprise re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will target the power of models to evolve. Think B2C2B. Think vertical. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to disintermediate dynamically leads to the ability to e-enable wirelessly. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the capability of e-markets to revolutionize. We think that most interactive portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PHP. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We will matrix the power of synergies to e-enable. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. Mountain Man practically invented the term "project management". The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our power to aggregate. We will disintermediate the capacity of methodologies to implement. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think intra-enterprise. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Unix. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be six-sigma? Without CAD, you will lack web services. We will incentivize the capability of extensible versioning to visualize. Mountain Man practically invented the term "e-commerce". What does the industry jargon "impactful, C2C2C" really mean? It may seem unimagined, but it's true! We think that most user-defined portals use far too much Python, and not enough C++. What does the term "open-source, cutting-edge" really mean? We will inflate our ability to enhance without diminishing our ability to syndicate. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to maximize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will enable the jargon-based term "magnetic". We think we know that it is better to optimize mega-macro-cyber-mega-virally than to empower virally. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point) be able to embrace easily. We always generate efficient R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things!