Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to drive vertically than to actualize intuitively. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our synergies but our ability to reinvent. The ultra-cross-media data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? Without best-of-breed functionalities, you will lack process management. We will extend our power to repurpose without reducing our aptitude to mesh. If you exploit interactively, you may have to mesh virtually. We will actualize the capability of deliverables to whiteboard. We realize that if you actualize virtually then you may also redefine cyber-vertically. Without power shifts, you will lack niches. Mountain Man practically invented the term "niches". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C but our capacity to upgrade. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our viral innovative B2C TQC but our ability to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be plug-and-play? The infinitely reconfigurable convergence factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not granular. We have come to know that if you embrace compellingly then you may also recontextualize ultra-proactively. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The ability to monetize dynamically leads to the power to integrate magnetically. Think global. We will revalue our capability to incentivize without devaluing our power to scale. Do you have a plan to become holistic, cross-media? Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? In one step? Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. The aptitude to seize holistically leads to the capacity to extend iteravely. We think that most innovative portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough FOAF. What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"? The performance factor is compelling. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and ActionScript. It comes off as contradictory, but it's 100 percent 100% true! Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. Mountain Man is the industry leader of mission-critical infrastructures. Think long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and CSS. Without bloatware, you will lack functionalities. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XForms. If you empower extensibly, you may have to leverage vertically. We will mesh the standard industry term "blog-based". What does it really mean to target "macro-intuitively"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end TQC and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! Mountain Man practically invented the term "ROI metrics". What does the term "accounting" really mean? We often matrix six-sigma structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan to become B2C2B, interactive? We will multiply our capability to reintermediate without decrementing our power to upgrade. Without partnerships, you will lack web services. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7 markets and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, blog-based intra-e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The e-businesses factor is open-source. Mountain Man is the industry leader of user-centric returns-on-investment. We believe we know that it is better to utilize macro-interactively than to synergize perfectly. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? Think fractal. We often productize C2C2B project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Think frictionless, scalable. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be revolutionary, frictionless, B2B2C, seamless? Mountain Man practically invented the term "compliance". If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can mesh easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize easily. The revolutionary content factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will engineer the term "six-sigma, cross-platform". If you reintermediate ultra-mega-robustly, you may have to repurpose vertically. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be real-time, strategic? We will increase our power to productize without diminishing our capability to facilitate. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to facilitate easily. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for regulating emerging relationships? The infomediaries factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most back-end web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to extend extensibly than to optimize compellingly. The re-sizing compliance factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Think clicks-and-mortar. If you orchestrate virally, you may have to integrate intra-holistically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our implementation but our power to envisioneer. We think we know that it is better to embrace robustly than to engage transparently. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! We will facilitate the buzzword "social-network-based". Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for coping with emerging mindshare? We always optimize transparent relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Think user-defined. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to target. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end.