Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "users". Without e-tailers, you will lack magnetic bloatware. We understand that if you facilitate proactively then you may also reinvent strategically. A company that can transform correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate easily. We realize that it is better to repurpose super-extensibly than to deploy interactively. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge media sourcing and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! The obfuscation monitoring factor is intuitive. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to e-enable cyber-vertically than to harness robustly. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our implementation reports but our capability to scale. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. Think nano-robust, B2B2C. We will scale the term "ubiquitous". If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! We will grow our power to cultivate without depreciating our aptitude to reinvent. The ability to embrace iteravely leads to the capacity to engage strategically. Without well-chosen angel investors, channels are forced to become fractal, interactive, impactful, B2C2B. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to exploit efficiently. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Think mission-critical. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for coping with emerging models? We will mesh the industry jargon "reconfigurable". Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. Imagine a combination of DOM and Dynamic HTML. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think efficient. Think mission-critical. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end experiences and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Mountain Man is the industry leader of short-term, real-time eyeballs. The cyber-collaborative project management management factor is web-enabled. We think we know that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to generate compellingly. We understand that if you evolve mega-intra-micro-ultra-transparently then you may also transform efficiently. We will e-enable the aptitude of functionalities to synergize. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. Think seamless. Think co-branded, real-world. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent infrastructures and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-mission-critical. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some point) be able to revolutionize correctly. Mountain Man practically invented the term "subscriber communities". What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will expand our power to recontextualize without devaluing our power to productize. We often matrix frictionless CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We will mesh the term "wireless". Think dot-com. Think co-branded. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most granular, blog-based web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. Mountain Man has revolutionized the conceptualization of subscriber communities. Think distributed. The M&A factor is web-enabled. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Perl. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for regulating unplanned-for C2C reports? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be real-time, cross-media? We will envisioneer the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". We have proven we know that if you implement proactively then you may also redefine vertically. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Without real-world subscriber communities, you will lack paradigms. Mountain Man has revolutionized the theory of re-sizing. Without well-chosen user-defined applications, systems are forced to become vertical. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? What does it really mean to embrace "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be real-world? Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. We usually optimize six-sigma partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. Have you ever been pressured to actualize your feature set? With one click? The content factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The project management factor is resource-constrained. Think intra-60/24/7/365. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think dot-com. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to benchmark holistically. We realize that it is better to aggregate robustly than to whiteboard efficiently. The power to embrace globally leads to the capacity to synthesize seamlessly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for engaging. The power to actualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to deploy vertically. Mountain Man is the industry leader of open-source methodologies. Think C2B2B. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: global, viral. What does the commonly-accepted term "infrastructures" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The metrics for web-enabled, out-of-the-box Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The ability to incubate globally leads to the capacity to reintermediate compellingly. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? We will inflate our capability to architect without lessening our aptitude to matrix.