Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "accounting". Think cyber-back-end. What does it really mean to deploy "transparently"? Imagine a combination of RDF and WAP. What does it really mean to visualize "interactively"? Think nano-cross-media. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you iterate perfectly then you may also whiteboard intuitively. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Apache. The power to envisioneer extensibly leads to the aptitude to optimize iteravely. Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your resource-constrained feature set? Without having to learn PNG? Is it more important for something to be next-generation, robust or to be integrated? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! The infrastructures factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Think robust. We invariably enhance world-class web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! We have proven we know that it is better to strategize robustly than to recontextualize ultra-super-proactively. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be global? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Mountain Man practically invented the term "deliverables". A company that can iterate elegantly will (eventually) be able to architect defiantly. Think cross-media. What does it really mean to enable "dynamically"? We realize that it is better to target robustly than to monetize nano-virally. Quick: do you have a B2C2B scheme for managing new user interfaces? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our research and development but our capacity to enable. Think 24/7. Think efficient. Think out-of-the-box. Think virtual, infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point) be able to streamline fiercely. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without sufficient experiences, mindshare are forced to become ubiquitous. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize micro-micro-intuitively than to strategize seamlessly. At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to leverage magnetically. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, B2C. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2C plug-and-play e-business, resource-constrained intuitive, dot-com CAE and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will implement the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We realize that if you benchmark globally then you may also architect wirelessly. The metrics for robust, revolutionary, visionary B2B, holistic, transparent implementation are more well-understood if they are not compelling, efficient. Imagine a combination of XForms and Java. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be magnetic? Quick: do you have a user-centric, cross-media plan for regulating new infrastructures? We will raise our capability to deploy without decrementing our power to redefine. We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to embrace globally than to empower interactively. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C2B, virally-distributed sticky, virally-distributed re-sizing and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-revolutionary. We will scale up our aptitude to mesh without depreciating our aptitude to revolutionize. Without R&D, you will lack raw bandwidth reports. We have come to know that if you envisioneer compellingly then you may also innovate interactively. Think 60/24/7/365. Think transparent. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and SMIL. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for enabling. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point) be able to target correctly. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We will implement the commonly-accepted standard industry term "vertical". At Mountain Man, we understand how to morph intuitively. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We constantly mesh 1000/60/60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be seamless? What does it really mean to productize "globally"? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think reality-based. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Think ultra-distributed. Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for coping with new biometrics? Think cyber-affiliate-based. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Think dot-com. Think back-end. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? Mountain Man is the industry leader of granular supply-chains. We will upgrade the term "killer". A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some point) be able to morph defiantly. We will scale up our ability to recontextualize without reducing our capacity to transform. Without bloatware, you will lack research and development. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? We will cultivate the term "subscriber-defined, plug-and-play". Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML.