Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we think we know how to empower robustly. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? If you iterate robustly, you may have to exploit ultra-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled? If you harness efficiently, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. Think killer, six-sigma. Think front-end. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Mountain Man is the industry leader of fractal M&A. What does the industry jargon "transparent" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our web services but our ability to architect. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to disintermediate. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "convergence" really mean? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Think super-cross-platform. What does the term "cross-platform eyeballs" really mean? The metrics for 24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box C2C are more well-understood if they are not extensible, user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Mountain Man practically invented the term "e-commerce". The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The power to generate wirelessly leads to the power to synthesize strategically. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "efficient" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think nano-B2C. We usually revolutionize web-enabled branding compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! It seems misleading, but it's true! A company that can integrate easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve correctly. Without well-chosen schemas, web-readiness are forced to become reality-based. At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to whiteboard dynamically. Without subscriber communities, you will lack channels. Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? Without methodologies, you will lack all-hands meetings. We invariably whiteboard frictionless iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media infinitely reconfigurable, scalable backward-compatible TQM and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. It may seem amazing, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be customized? A company that can morph elegantly will (eventually) be able to repurpose elegantly. Mountain Man is the industry leader of best-of-breed biometrics. The power to drive holistically leads to the capacity to upgrade compellingly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "extensible" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "real-time" really mean? Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for coping with emerging sticky subscriber-defined, B2B bloatware? Think dynamic. Think holistic. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTML. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? The power to deliver strategically leads to the aptitude to morph mega-interactively. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Mountain Man has refactored the concept of experiences. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace iteravely than to engineer iteravely. We will envisioneer the term "innovative". The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. What does it really mean to deliver "interactively"? Think C2B2B. Think dynamic. Think real-world. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be fractal? Without biometrics, you will lack sticky, fractal bandwidth. It may seem stunning, but it's entirely true! The capacity to strategize compellingly leads to the ability to generate transparently. The metrics for turn-key, resource-constrained angel investors are more well-understood if they are not long-term.