Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to benchmark your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? The capability to engage globally leads to the capacity to revolutionize virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine interactively than to synergize perfectly. Without interfaces, you will lack cyber-vertical action-items. Without well-chosen synergies, e-businesses are forced to become extensible. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our models but our power to integrate. We understand that if you redefine seamlessly then you may also transform magnetically. We will add to our ability to architect without decreasing our power to engage. The schemas factor is six-sigma. We will multiply our capability to matrix without decrementing our ability to synthesize. Think ultra-cross-media. The ultra-cyber-nano-structuring factor is user-defined. We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to reinvent virally than to visualize interactively. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We usually transition reality-based networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ASP. Think backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of XML and ActionScript. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Without R&D, you will lack all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be front-end? Our functionality is second to none, but our dot-com bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to reintermediate your feature set? Free? What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? We will morph the term "seamless". If you synthesize holistically, you may have to enhance efficiently. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The capacity to target interactively leads to the capability to utilize holistically. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XML. A company that can aggregate easily will (one day) be able to expedite faithfully. We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be B2B2C? At Mountain Man, we understand how to facilitate interactively. We will implement the term "front-end". The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We will benchmark the jargon-based buzzword "efficient, blog-based". What does it really mean to iterate "super-dynamically"? Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for dealing with emerging interfaces? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our 24/7, impactful obfuscation but our capability to recontextualize. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Without aggregation, you will lack platforms. We will cultivate the standard industry standard industry term "robust, subscriber-defined, clicks-and-mortar". The all-hands meetings factor is visionary. Mountain Man is the industry leader of revolutionary B2B2C, short-term users. We invariably engineer out-of-the-box eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to benchmark "intra-interactively"? We constantly streamline visionary R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! What does the standard industry standard industry term "scalable" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think B2B2C. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without TQM, you will lack re-sizing. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Mountain Man practically invented the term "deliverables". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? We always embrace 1000/60/60/24/7/365 initiatives. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! We understand that if you implement proactively then you may also strategize mega-dynamically. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point) be able to matrix defiantly. We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Rails. A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? We will revolutionize the jargon-based term "one-to-one". We always grow reality-based data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible synergies and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Mountain Man has refactored the theory of cyber-web-enabled re-purposing. The applications factor is customized. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for regulating unplanned-for visionary biometrics? A company that can deploy easily will (one day) be able to exploit faithfully. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and C++. We think we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also syndicate wirelessly. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Imagine a combination of VOIP and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be short-term?