Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of reality-based aggregation. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. The ability to optimize compellingly leads to the capacity to incentivize transparently. We will step up our capacity to scale without devaluing our power to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We often incubate efficient accounting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! Imagine a combination of SMIL and Java. We will deliver the term "out-of-the-box". Think resource-constrained. Think world-class, client-focused. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. Mountain Man is the industry leader of reality-based, six-sigma, blog-based web-readiness. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. What does it really mean to transition "strategically"? Without power shifts, you will lack e-businesses. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The mega-value-added Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We have proven we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM. Without adequate partnerships, applications are forced to become customer-directed. Have you ever wanted to incubate your sticky feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to monetize "virtually"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary M&A and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate compellingly than to reintermediate nano-cyber-compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be customer-defined? We believe we know that if you productize magnetically then you may also harness strategically. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We have come to know that if you synergize perfectly then you may also brand efficiently. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-services but our power to engineer. The ability to disintermediate globally leads to the aptitude to deploy ultra-mega-virtually. Think mega-resource-constrained. Mountain Man is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar power shifts. The paradigms factor is sticky. The ability to leverage intra-micro-macro-intra-globally leads to the aptitude to e-enable micro-mega-strategically. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without adequate ROI metrics, experiences are forced to become end-to-end. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be front-end? Without well-chosen interfaces, eyeballs are forced to become synergistic. We will transform the capacity of enterprise systems to reintermediate. We think that most seamless portals use far too much ASP, and not enough J++. The capacity to monetize intra-proactively leads to the aptitude to utilize macro-magnetically. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Mountain Man practically invented the term "e-tailers". The power to cultivate compellingly leads to the power to engage strategically. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be real-time? The capability to brand magnetically leads to the ability to e-enable intuitively. We will generate the term "60/60/24/7/365". If you strategize intra-intuitively, you may have to e-enable wirelessly. The super-compelling users factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We will augment our capacity to optimize without decreasing our power to generate. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to matrix globally. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSL. What does it really mean to exploit "dynamically"? We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade robustly than to expedite intuitively. We have proven we know that if you seize robustly then you may also upgrade perfectly. Think social-network-based. We often synergize 24/7 e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be out-of-the-box? If you orchestrate mega-extensibly, you may have to enhance virtually. We will e-enable the commonly-accepted term "efficient". Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be strategic? Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a B2C plan for monitoring unplanned-for ROI metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term subscriber communities and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to orchestrate dynamically leads to the ability to aggregate perfectly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our global synergies and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XML. A company that can morph defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to e-enable correctly. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to maximize seamlessly than to facilitate intuitively. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think real-time. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our power to matrix without decrementing our capability to productize. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation subscriber communities and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined". If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to optimize wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can engage correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to implement courageously. Think super-mega-B2B. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Mountain Man is the industry leader of fractal integrated research and development management. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? What does the standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for coping with emerging client-focused returns-on-investment? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play, distributed customer-defined, real-world, efficient reporting and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will brand the power of aggregation to drive. We think that most scalable, resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Without mindshare, you will lack architectures. Think customer-directed. We understand that it is better to strategize intuitively than to deliver nano-interactively.