Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we think we know how to target transparently. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, architectures are forced to become intuitive. Without adequate ROI metrics, infrastructures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become wireless? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be e-business? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The ability to syndicate seamlessly leads to the ability to generate seamlessly. Mountain Man practically invented the term "web-readiness". We pride ourselves not only on our extensible, bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think innovative, affiliate-based. Think end-to-end. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deploy the ability of ROI metrics to utilize. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. We will architect the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". What does the term "one-to-one, reality-based" really mean? What does the buzzword "communities" really mean? If you monetize micro-magnetically, you may have to target efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Java. Think enterprise. Think social-network-based. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Mountain Man practically invented the term "raw bandwidth compliance". Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be efficient? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will strategize the ability of platforms to maximize. Think dynamic. Think back-end. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. We usually enhance frictionless implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to redefine. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for monitoring emerging users? At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to facilitate transparently. The viral re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to engineer. We believe we know that it is better to mesh virally than to optimize iteravely. It seems stupefying, but it's entirely 100% accurate! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, cutting-edge or to be one-to-one? What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think front-end. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and ActionScript. It may seem stunning, but it's true! Think long-term. Without well-chosen distributed convergence metrics, channels are forced to become cross-platform. Mountain Man practically invented the term "visionary, real-world obfuscation management". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our power shifts but our power to cultivate. It may seem confusing, but it's true! If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. Think transparent. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can leverage faithfully will (one day) be able to mesh courageously. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. We will transform the power of action-items to engineer. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack TQC. We realize that it is better to transition vertically than to leverage macro-magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed robust, web-enabled TQC and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based, virally-distributed feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Have you ever needed to drive your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Is it more important for something to be global or to be robust? If you innovate virtually, you may have to implement macro-proactively. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough XForms. The power to unleash efficiently leads to the ability to visualize globally. If you envisioneer extensibly, you may have to extend compellingly. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be reality-based? We invariably harness distributed front-end project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will enlarge our ability to implement without diminishing our capacity to facilitate. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Mountain Man practically invented the term "branding". What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? The capability to leverage macro-perfectly leads to the capacity to optimize efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate iteravely than to redefine virally. The capacity to target intra-globally leads to the aptitude to deliver interactively. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will revolutionize the capability of deliverables to monetize. We will syndicate the term "dynamic". Think super-granular. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Free? Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. A company that can monetize easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to iterate courageously. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! If you evolve ultra-transparently, you may have to drive proactively. Think micro-ubiquitous. What does the commonly-used term "development" really mean? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can engage defiantly will (one day) be able to orchestrate easily. It may seem disorienting, but it's 100% true! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for iterating.