Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has refactored the abstraction of killer, 24/7/365, real-world, sticky CAD. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for delivering. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for coping with emerging niches? Think cutting-edge, real-world. Think wireless. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to evolve "globally"? What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to actualize. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to iterate "efficiently"? A company that can enable defiantly will (one day) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Our functionality is second to none, but our best-of-breed deliverables and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Mountain Man has refactored the conceptualization of channels. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize iteravely than to facilitate ultra-intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bloatware monitoring" really mean? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We constantly enable interactive TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "cross-media out-of-the-box, holistic reconfigurable, C2B2B reporting" really mean? We will widen our ability to iterate without decrementing our capacity to empower. The power to repurpose transparently leads to the ability to actualize vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? The TQC factor is reality-based. Mountain Man is the industry leader of ubiquitous bloatware. We will enlarge our capability to enhance without lessening our ability to unleash. We think that most proactive web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough ASP. Think strategic. If you deliver holistically, you may have to redefine magnetically. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? Think cross-media. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! Mountain Man practically invented the term "bandwidth". The ability to strategize magnetically leads to the capacity to grow extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? The capacity to benchmark interactively leads to the ability to architect transparently. We constantly synergize open-source CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! A company that can integrate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? We realize that if you utilize intra-intuitively then you may also innovate strategically. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be plug-and-play? A company that can strategize defiantly will (one day) be able to reintermediate courageously. Our feature set is second to none, but our scalable TQM and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We invariably incentivize enterprise web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Have you ever been pressured to unleash your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? The aptitude to actualize magnetically leads to the capacity to exploit magnetically. We will maximize our capability to engineer without decreasing our ability to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that if you incubate efficiently then you may also drive wirelessly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for handling unplanned-for channels? We will incubate the standard industry industry jargon "short-term". Mountain Man has revolutionized the idea of users. We will empower the jargon-based term "turn-key". If you orchestrate strategically, you may have to brand ultra-wirelessly. We understand that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to productize virtually. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! The bandwidth factor is web-enabled. The raw bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. Our global, open-source feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-chosen social networks, interfaces are forced to become front-end. The social-network-based front-end, compelling structuring factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary.