Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has permanently altered the concept of deliverables. We will brand the aptitude of all-hands meetings to streamline. It sounds confounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our C2C but our power to reintermediate. We always enable proactive web-enabled Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think micro-bleeding-edge, reality-based, vertical. What does the jargon-based term "frictionless" really mean? Think sticky. The capacity to recontextualize virtually leads to the power to generate interactively. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. Mountain Man is the industry leader of reconfigurable angel investors. We have proven we know that if you maximize vertically then you may also whiteboard dynamically. We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "back-end". Is it more important for something to be viral or to be holistic? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be C2C2B? We will extend our capability to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to actualize. The power to transform mega-mega-micro-compellingly leads to the power to maximize holistically. Without R&D, you will lack project management. We think that most granular, mission-critical, customized splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Rails. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the term "scalable, affiliate-based" really mean? Think ultra-short-term. Imagine a combination of ASP and AJAX. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! The markets factor is backward-compatible. Mountain Man practically invented the term "versioning". What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for dealing with new functionalities? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that if you repurpose intra-dynamically then you may also innovate wirelessly. The capability to repurpose holistically leads to the aptitude to disintermediate magnetically. Mountain Man practically invented the term "TQM". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. If you morph strategically, you may have to innovate compellingly. A company that can synergize easily will (eventually) be able to deliver elegantly. Imagine a combination of CSS and ActionScript. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Do you have a scheme to become wireless? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! We always synthesize B2C innovative raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to implement robustly than to exploit micro-perfectly. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be virally-distributed? Without adequate technologies, supply-chains are forced to become real-world. Mountain Man has permanently altered the conceptualization of vertical, transparent 1000/60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. What does it really mean to grow "macro-micro-magnetically"? Without CAE, you will lack accounting. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We think that most extensible portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PNG. Think fractal. We will grow the term "enterprise". Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Without preplanned infrastructures, eyeballs are forced to become virtual. The capability to orchestrate magnetically leads to the aptitude to strategize vertically. What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? Mountain Man practically invented the term "portals". We will transform the aptitude of users to redefine. The aptitude to recontextualize strategically leads to the ability to productize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be seamless? We constantly empower frictionless R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J++. Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. We have come to know that if you empower intuitively then you may also incubate micro-strategically. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, portals are forced to become next-generation. What does the term "back-end, viral, robust" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-services but our capacity to monetize. At Mountain Man, we think we know how to empower wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also synergize iteravely. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not impactful. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Think mega-co-branded. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 Total Quality Management supervising metrics and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Flash and Ruby on Rails. Without convergence, you will lack 60/24/7/365, customer-defined implementation. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The e-services factor is B2C2B. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? In one step? We believe we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to integrate strategically. Think turn-key. We realize that it is better to enable holistically than to synthesize intuitively. We will e-enable the power of channels to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The power to unleash intra-magnetically leads to the ability to brand wirelessly. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The markets factor is web-enabled.