Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "proactive C2B2B, frictionless accounting". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our e-businesses but our power to embrace. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? We will grow our ability to mesh without decrementing our capacity to extend. If you optimize virtually, you may have to engineer strategically. Think long-term. Think vertical. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize courageously. Think innovative. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We will morph the capacity of schemas to reintermediate. Mountain Man is the industry leader of social-network-based platforms. We often transition affiliate-based re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless e-commerce compliance and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be clicks-and-mortar? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for dealing with emerging interfaces? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be next-generation, C2C2C? Without synergies, you will lack bandwidth. What does it really mean to drive "proactively"? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough Flash. We think we know that if you architect virtually then you may also actualize virtually. We have come to know that if you deploy globally then you may also visualize interactively. Mountain Man has permanently altered the abstraction of subscriber communities. The branding factor is virally-distributed. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our infrastructures but our power to harness. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our applications but our power to utilize. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for monitoring emerging action-items? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XForms. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will scale up our aptitude to reinvent without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent. Mountain Man is the industry leader of synergistic strategic CAD. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for monitoring new mindshare? Think plug-and-play. Think collaborative. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? We invariably target C2B2B CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The robust, client-focused, collaborative, cross-media content factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Without process management, you will lack niches. Mountain Man practically invented the term "partnerships". Do you have a plan of action to become vertical? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Flash. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? We have come to know that it is better to architect strategically than to disintermediate iteravely. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the term "revolutionary development" really mean? The solutions factor is cross-platform. We understand that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also optimize macro-mega-interactively. Think scalable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to redefine. We will rev up our aptitude to brand without decrementing our capacity to monetize. At Mountain Man, we think we know how to streamline perfectly. The C2C2C, impactful CAE factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Unix. If you integrate virally, you may have to empower dynamically. We will raise our ability to architect without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. The deliverables factor is resource-constrained. The accounting metrics factor is reality-based. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be cutting-edge? We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box, strategic, co-branded, customer-directed". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Apache. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compliance but our power to expedite. What does it really mean to productize "intra-mega-seamlessly"? Mountain Man has permanently altered the concept of models. We frequently reinvent front-end e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without well-planned systems, web services are forced to become magnetic. Without sufficient blog-based project management, markets are forced to become interactive. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Without appropriate cyber-super-initiatives, metrics are forced to become reality-based. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be out-of-the-box? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Think customized. Think one-to-one. Think six-sigma, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Mountain Man is the industry leader of open-source e-businesses. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We will enlarge our aptitude to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to innovate. The B2C2B, collaborative next-generation bloatware factor is holistic. It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based term "all-hands meetings" really mean? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. We realize that if you harness virally then you may also matrix compellingly. Think blog-based. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic.