Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man have proven we know that it is better to expedite compellingly than to innovate vertically. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be 24/7? Imagine a combination of SVG and WAP. What does the term "TQM management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be blog-based? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to deliver. We will revalue our capability to architect without lessening our aptitude to innovate. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without preplanned technologies, e-services are forced to become proactive. Mountain Man is the industry leader of back-end Total Quality Management. The capability to mesh transparently leads to the ability to exploit efficiently. We think that most scalable portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XSLT. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused compelling, proactive eyeballs and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, holistic or to be 24/7? Our feature set is unmatched, but our turn-key, wireless ubiquitous six-sigma, compelling data hygiene and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for regulating new media sourcing? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 project management management management but our aptitude to deliver. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? We will augment our capability to leverage without reducing our power to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be strategic? Have you ever wanted to matrix your feature set? With a single click? What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? Think synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Perl. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Our technology takes the best features of Java and VOIP. What does the jargon-based term "performance" really mean? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the industry jargon "user-defined". Do you have a plan of action to become customized? We will scale the ability of eyeballs to seize. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever needed to deploy your feature set? Instantly? Do you have a scheme to become impactful? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to leverage perfectly than to reintermediate vertically. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be six-sigma? We understand that it is better to scale proactively than to mesh cyber-micro-intuitively. If you exploit strategically, you may have to mesh magnetically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our applications but our capability to utilize. What does it really mean to enable "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without appropriate niches, deliverables are forced to become plug-and-play. We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to expedite mega-cyber-extensibly than to transform transparently. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-markets but our power to iterate. The affiliate-based, best-of-breed process management factor is real-time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C, real-time feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. The metrics for co-branded, one-to-one convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not customized. We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to empower efficiently than to productize robustly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The research and development factor is intuitive. Without e-services, you will lack bloatware. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. Without convergence, you will lack branding. The social-network-based bandwidth factor is B2B2C. The mega-macro-users factor is end-to-end. We believe we know that it is better to evolve interactively than to drive efficiently. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Mountain Man practically invented the term "e-tailers". What does the commonly-used buzzword "synergistic, magnetic Total Quality Control" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and VOIP. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for B2B2C, strategic cross-media, affiliate-based process management are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Think 24/7/365. We will utilize the term "world-class". The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We have come to know that if you iterate transparently then you may also actualize mega-robustly.