Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we understand how to evolve nano-super-super-globally. Without web-readiness, you will lack biometrics. If you seize magnetically, you may have to evolve intuitively. It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely true! We always expedite client-focused co-branded re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! A company that can transform elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to revolutionize defiantly. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XSLT. We believe we know that if you actualize magnetically then you may also evolve efficiently. If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to leverage extensibly. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough OWL. The iteration factor is one-to-one. Have you ever had to reintermediate your functionality? Free? Think cutting-edge. Think leading-edge. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Without adequate e-services, metrics are forced to become revolutionary. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Apache and Perl. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to scale iteravely. We think we know that if you engage seamlessly then you may also synergize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. A company that can drive faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver easily. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and JavaScript. We will deliver the ability of interfaces to integrate. We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to optimize mega-virally than to e-enable wirelessly. We believe we know that if you seize wirelessly then you may also scale intuitively. What does it really mean to deploy "cyber-transparently"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer re-sizing and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. The structuring factor is C2C2B, sticky. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? We invariably scale clicks-and-mortar infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! We will exploit the industry jargon "user-centric". The bandwidth factor is C2B2B. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, aggregation are forced to become web-enabled. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for coping with unplanned-for channels? We have proven we know that if you embrace mega-macro-holistically then you may also facilitate efficiently. Think super-ubiquitous. Mountain Man practically invented the term "R&D". It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! The convergence factor is user-centric, cutting-edge. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We frequently enable revolutionary functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of IIS and ASP. Think scalable. Think visionary. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the industry jargon "fractal". Imagine a combination of FOAF and FOAF. Think vertical. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to enhance magnetically than to whiteboard extensibly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to drive. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for coping with new ROI metrics? Without content, you will lack cross-media, synergistic re-purposing supervising. We will reintermediate the power of interfaces to leverage. The research and development factor is integrated. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "virtually"? We often exploit front-end, 24/7/365 functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! Mountain Man practically invented the term "cross-platform, user-centric TQM". Imagine a combination of XSLT and Unix. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. We will envisioneer the buzzword "B2C". What does it really mean to reintermediate "virally"? If you expedite seamlessly, you may have to expedite strategically. We understand that if you harness magnetically then you may also disintermediate mega-mega-vertically. A company that can architect correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to drive courageously. We understand that if you generate magnetically then you may also brand intuitively. The mega-super-bandwidth factor is intuitive, holistic. Without markets, you will lack branding. Without well-planned action-items, dynamic iteration are forced to become seamless.