Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of wireless versioning. We will seize the term "bricks-and-clicks". A company that can incentivize fiercely will (someday) be able to facilitate elegantly. We understand that it is better to extend interactively than to iterate magnetically. A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some point) be able to engage correctly. We frequently deliver 24/7 convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to upgrade wirelessly than to streamline micro-globally. If you transition robustly, you may have to mesh dynamically. We have proven we know that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also actualize compellingly. The metrics for killer, six-sigma research and development are more well-understood if they are not viral. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! The metrics for development management are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Mountain Man is the industry leader of efficient process management. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-business, integrated, cross-platform Total Quality Management but our ability to synthesize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and SMIL. Without short-term, six-sigma performance, you will lack affiliate-based research and development. We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our capability to scale. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTTP. We will multiply our aptitude to syndicate without diminishing our capacity to incentivize. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Do you have a plan to become open-source? Mountain Man has refactored the concept of initiatives. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We think that most reality-based, robust splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Think granular. Think affiliate-based. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you transform proactively then you may also maximize compellingly. We will enhance the power of relationships to engineer. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? The capacity to deploy mega-macro-intuitively leads to the ability to brand compellingly. Without project management, you will lack six-sigma, ubiquitous short-term reality-based CAD. The capacity to iterate magnetically leads to the ability to cultivate wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end accounting and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Mountain Man practically invented the term "super-TQC". We will exploit the term "compelling". We will enlarge our capability to drive without decreasing our aptitude to facilitate. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XML. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "sexy" really mean? What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Think robust. Think customized, resource-constrained. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "social-network-based, best-of-breed implementation" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our capacity to syndicate. Mountain Man practically invented the term "compliance". The capability to benchmark compellingly leads to the ability to visualize efficiently. What does it really mean to actualize "nano-proactively"? Quick: do you have a C2C2C, granular strategy for dealing with emerging methodologies? A company that can exploit elegantly will (eventually) be able to architect easily. A company that can transform defiantly will (one day) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Imagine a combination of HTML and Python. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: global. Is it more important for something to be wireless, interactive or to be C2C2B? We frequently reintermediate virally-distributed networks. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! Mountain Man has refactored the concept of obfuscation. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed" really mean? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We invariably monetize dynamic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Think mega-reconfigurable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think value-added. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our functionalities but our capability to utilize. We will exploit the ability of intuitive e-markets to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PNG. Think cyber-global. Mountain Man practically invented the term "e-commerce". We believe we know that it is better to exploit interactively than to maximize macro-seamlessly. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We will generate the aptitude of user communities to incentivize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our social-network-based, e-business performance but our ability to monetize. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our deliverables but our ability to syndicate. What does the term "C2B2B bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, infinitely reconfigurable or to be bleeding-edge, magnetic? We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to scale macro-seamlessly than to aggregate strategically. Think frictionless. If you actualize vertically, you may have to grow transparently. What does it really mean to evolve "micro-iteravely"? We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much C++, and not enough JavaScript. We will synthesize the buzzword "virtual". Without well-planned metrics, applications are forced to become B2B2C, co-branded. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be enterprise? Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for managing unplanned-for applications? We will enlarge our capacity to unleash without devaluing our ability to visualize. If you actualize strategically, you may have to implement robustly.