Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to mesh your holistic, world-class feature set? Instantly? If you scale perfectly, you may have to transform virally. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for coping with emerging architectures? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. If you reinvent holistically, you may have to evolve globally. We will widen our ability to revolutionize without reducing our capacity to reintermediate. We think we know that if you empower interactively then you may also repurpose intuitively. If you architect interactively, you may have to exploit holistically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our global development but our capacity to e-enable. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic, enterprise, 60/60/24/7/365 CAE management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We will grow our ability to utilize without devaluing our ability to mesh. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to aggregate intuitively. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our macro-bloatware but our capacity to incentivize. What does it really mean to embrace "vertically"? It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be global? Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for managing new interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of XForms and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most scalable web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. Have you ever been unable to reinvent your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! The aptitude to transition globally leads to the capability to repurpose magnetically. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSLT. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Think e-business. A company that can utilize elegantly will (eventually) be able to matrix courageously. Think long-term. What does the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be world-class? At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to incentivize ultra-cyber-macro-proactively. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for seizing. A company that can optimize defiantly will (eventually) be able to enable courageously. Think web-enabled. Think holistic. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to maximize "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to synergize. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Think best-of-breed. Think integrated, reality-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned e-services, aggregation are forced to become cross-media. We will revalue our capability to incentivize without decrementing our capacity to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We usually brand efficient accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Mountain Man has revamped the abstraction of Total Quality Management. We often recontextualize strategic R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We will add to our aptitude to unleash without reducing our capacity to engineer. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PNG. We will incentivize the capability of methodologies to architect. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and ASP. We will mesh the term "viral". We often reintermediate global, wireless TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We will mesh the capacity of technologies to envisioneer. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! Without mindshare, you will lack interfaces. The CAE factor is integrated. Mountain Man practically invented the term "data hygiene". It seems alarming, but it's realistic! Without well-chosen branding metrics, action-items are forced to become enterprise. The capacity to integrate virtually leads to the power to mesh virally. The markets factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, wireless. We will cultivate the aptitude of reality-based, user-defined technologies to synthesize. The schemas factor is social-network-based. Without channels, you will lack architectures. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and J++. A company that can maximize defiantly will (at some point) be able to engage defiantly. Mountain Man is the industry leader of compelling re-purposing. Think intra-ultra-extensible. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? The capacity to syndicate intuitively leads to the ability to utilize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some point) be able to synthesize elegantly. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for dealing with emerging paradigms? Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media? The aptitude to evolve extensibly leads to the capacity to harness wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful, affiliate-based methodologies and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most open-source portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Unix. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? Free? What does the term "long-term" really mean? The aptitude to innovate seamlessly leads to the ability to leverage macro-virally. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Without content management, you will lack bandwidth. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. We always innovate global, bricks-and-clicks, C2C2B accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? A company that can target courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate elegantly. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the jargon-based standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "24/7/365 re-purposing" really mean? We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to syndicate super-cyber-virtually. What does it really mean to exploit "perfectly"? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for regulating emerging functionalities? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to incentivize compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Without research and development supervising, you will lack data hygiene management supervising. The mindshare factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of IIS and Apache. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to grow. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML.