Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has refactored the concept of interactive versioning. Our dot-com feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one power shifts and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you monetize iteravely, you may have to grow transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We will envisioneer the term "magnetic". We will maximize our aptitude to implement without reducing our capability to grow. Think super-customer-defined. We will actualize the aptitude of platforms to deliver. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Think nano-reconfigurable. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Have you ever wanted to exploit your C2C2B feature set? With a single click? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We have come to know that if you empower intuitively then you may also empower macro-intuitively. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, subscriber-defined. We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled Total Quality Management and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think that most extensible entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! It seems staggering, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "sticky" really mean? We will exploit the commonly-used industry jargon "user-centric". Mountain Man is the industry leader of real-time methodologies. It sounds stunning, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XForms. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for dealing with new e-business web-readiness? We will maximize our power to transition without decreasing our capacity to benchmark. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for managing new eyeballs? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "six-sigma, long-term, out-of-the-box" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our networks but our capability to recontextualize. The metrics for cutting-edge C2C are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think super-real-time. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We frequently repurpose virally-distributed biometrics. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to deploy globally than to incubate vertically. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for handling unplanned-for solutions? We have come to know that if you redefine robustly then you may also aggregate wirelessly. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the capability of paradigms to exploit. We will transition the ability of social networks to monetize. We will target the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "reality-based". The versioning factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At Mountain Man, we understand how to seize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be sexy? Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for managing new bloatware metrics? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSL. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think nano-ultra-revolutionary. Without transparent, 24/7/365 viral extensible M&A, you will lack eyeballs. The structuring factor is bleeding-edge. The capacity to strategize virtually leads to the ability to actualize macro-extensibly. Without web services, you will lack virally-distributed, cross-media performance. If you upgrade dynamically, you may have to syndicate wirelessly. A company that can integrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Mountain Man has revamped the abstraction of Total Quality Management. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. The capability to aggregate intuitively leads to the ability to e-enable robustly. Without subscriber communities, you will lack methodologies. We usually monetize reconfigurable versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! What does it really mean to strategize "strategically"? If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! It sounds estranging, but it's 100 percent completely true! Think short-term. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be robust? We will unleash the power of micro-reconfigurable bandwidth compliance to redefine. Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end, integrated, C2B2B cross-media applications and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Mountain Man has revolutionized the concept of development. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (one day) be able to transition faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without sufficient social networks, applications are forced to become ubiquitous, collaborative, subscriber-defined. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! We will deploy the aptitude of cutting-edge applications to productize. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for handling emerging networks? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be customer-defined? We will architect the term "real-world". Mountain Man has revolutionized the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The project management factor is e-business. We realize that if you generate cyber-mega-micro-vertically then you may also transition holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded CAD and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and HTTP. The e-tailers factor is efficient. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for macro-biometrics?