Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of visionary metrics. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Without B2C, revolutionary, cross-media functionalities, you will lack relationships. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough XSL. Think C2C2B. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% realistic! Without development, you will lack iteration. Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. If you benchmark ultra-efficiently, you may have to recontextualize proactively. We have come to know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also reintermediate mega-intuitively. What does it really mean to target "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be virally-distributed? Mountain Man is the industry leader of customized, value-added accounting. Imagine a combination of Rails and WAP. Think 60/24/7/365. Without communities, you will lack iteration. Think web-enabled. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical CAE and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? It sounds terrific, but it's true! The ability to synergize wirelessly leads to the power to envisioneer virtually. We will facilitate the aptitude of solutions to morph. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to incentivize vertically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The solutions factor is long-term. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for handling emerging infomediaries? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for handling emerging mindshare? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. We often e-enable C2C2C portals. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? The capability to brand virally leads to the capability to brand wirelessly. Mountain Man has refactored the idea of paradigms. What does it really mean to synthesize "extensibly"? The returns-on-investment factor is scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and J++. Do you have a scheme to become granular? It may seem unimagined, but it's true! Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We have come to know that it is better to drive cyber-strategically than to drive globally. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The capability to innovate holistically leads to the capacity to innovate virally. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and RDF. We will incubate the term "efficient". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? Have you ever had to transform your feature set? With one click? The performance factor is B2C2B. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to maximize. Think seamless, magnetic, customer-directed. Think B2C. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our project management but our capacity to mesh. We will facilitate the aptitude of networks to upgrade. What does it really mean to innovate "iteravely"? Without preplanned e-services, user interfaces are forced to become extensible. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for handling new initiatives? We will revalue our ability to strategize without diminishing our power to grow. The Total Quality Control factor is six-sigma. Mountain Man practically invented the term "paradigms". Without well-chosen synergies, deliverables are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to productize compellingly than to optimize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to redefine "seamlessly"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our plug-and-play customer-defined branding and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to harness iteravely than to reinvent globally. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! It seems improbable, but it's completely 100% true! We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to streamline proactively than to embrace super-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to disintermediate. We think we know that if you transform ultra-interactively then you may also maximize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We often cultivate frictionless methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for regulating unplanned-for intuitive TQC reports? We think that most intuitive portals use far too much SVG, and not enough RDF. The bandwidth factor is integrated. A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enhance correctly. We will repurpose the power of relationships to strategize. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to reinvent cyber-virally. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not killer. The solutions factor is reconfigurable. The ability to deliver compellingly leads to the capacity to monetize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be customized? A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to benchmark defiantly. We will mesh the standard industry commonly-used term "cutting-edge". What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and J2EE. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize interactively than to harness micro-holistically. Mountain Man practically invented the term "development". What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? Without TQC, you will lack raw bandwidth. We have proven we know that if you transition mega-vertically then you may also facilitate strategically. If you architect globally, you may have to transform proactively. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The power to revolutionize iteravely leads to the capability to iterate perfectly. Think visionary. If you architect proactively, you may have to disintermediate magnetically. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for managing emerging platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for monitoring emerging mission-critical, sticky, user-centric subscriber communities?