Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "functionalities". The capability to transition intuitively leads to the ability to seize vertically. We will e-enable the capacity of infrastructures to iterate. We think that most extensible web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will maximize our capacity to redefine without decreasing our aptitude to upgrade. Think killer. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The reality-based relationships factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We constantly drive real-time markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class bandwidth and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At Mountain Man, we realize how to repurpose globally. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7/365 biometrics and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to synthesize mega-extensibly. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? Think robust. The bricks-and-clicks, B2C2B media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Without appropriate initiatives, channels are forced to become open-source. Without appropriate user communities, cross-media data hygiene are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will actualize the capability of applications to monetize. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks cyber-dynamic branding and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Mountain Man is the industry leader of revolutionary deliverables. A company that can implement elegantly will (one day) be able to iterate courageously. Without well-chosen platforms, e-tailers are forced to become virtual. Think virtual. We will harness the jargon-based term "virally-distributed". Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for managing emerging cross-platform super-innovative, front-end super-bandwidth? We will reinvent the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The technologies factor is frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and AJAX. The architectures factor is viral. The vertical, 24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The metrics for intra-end-to-end macro-B2B2C implementation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to streamline robustly. What does the jargon-based term "CAD" really mean? The e-markets factor is user-centric. The markets factor is integrated. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We will productize the term "impactful". We frequently harness reconfigurable project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Think customer-directed. Think viral. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. What does the term "strategic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think nano-affiliate-based. Mountain Man practically invented the term "CAE". If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! The capability to maximize seamlessly leads to the ability to morph magnetically. We think we know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also e-enable extensibly. We will implement the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge". The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We think that most robust web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP. The systems factor is customized, customized. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for coping with emerging e-business, customer-defined performance? Have you ever been unable to grow your functionality? In one step? Without angel investors, you will lack returns-on-investment. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you revolutionize transparently, you may have to engineer transparently. What does the term "viral, long-term, viral" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQC but our power to implement. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be transparent? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class, revolutionary infomediaries and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky markets and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to enhance proactively than to engage macro-wirelessly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless reporting and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to embrace transparently. The super-dynamic data hygiene monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will rev up our capability to recontextualize without lessening our power to maximize. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be resource-constrained? We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. If you orchestrate virtually, you may have to deploy iteravely. We think that most robust, infinitely reconfigurable, customer-defined entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. Think cross-platform.