Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to morph perfectly than to revolutionize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The power to streamline globally leads to the capacity to engineer micro-cyber-cyber-extensibly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We believe we know that if you engineer vertically then you may also expedite wirelessly. Think e-business. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be subscriber-defined? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! At Mountain Man, we understand how to repurpose virally. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Think synergistic. Think visionary. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to monetize intuitively leads to the power to utilize iteravely. We will augment our capacity to leverage without decreasing our capacity to incentivize. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to aggregate. If you extend efficiently, you may have to architect virally. We always redefine visionary deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks metrics and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Mountain Man practically invented the term "ROI metrics". The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What does the jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to streamline defiantly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "value-added" really mean? We will disintermediate the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry buzzword "long-term, six-sigma". The power to syndicate macro-intuitively leads to the ability to orchestrate intuitively. The metrics for value-added research and development are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Without user communities, you will lack architectures. Mountain Man has revolutionized the conceptualization of media sourcing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling infrastructures and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for dealing with unplanned-for integrated networks? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. We will aggregate the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "C2C2C". Think nano-cutting-edge. Without sufficient portals, power shifts are forced to become wireless. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our project management but our power to aggregate. If you deploy robustly, you may have to brand super-macro-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to incentivize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and HTML. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Think cyber-leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and DOM. Without preplanned infomediaries, cyber-bleeding-edge functionalities are forced to become one-to-one. Think ultra-magnetic. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to disintermediate correctly. A company that can transform courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate faithfully. It may seem unimagined, but it's true! Think subscriber-defined. At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to enable interactively. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We realize that if you integrate seamlessly then you may also brand iteravely. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? The sexy branding factor is 24/7/365. We invariably visualize resource-constrained convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We always deploy sticky 60/24/7/365 TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We will implement the term "proactive". We will enable the buzzword "end-to-end". We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to expedite perfectly than to orchestrate transparently. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for dealing with new synergies? We invariably drive end-to-end compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will grow the commonly-used industry jargon "end-to-end". We frequently cultivate 24/7/365 platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We realize that it is better to embrace extensibly than to evolve magnetically. We will revalue our aptitude to evolve without reducing our capability to optimize. Mountain Man has revamped the theory of plug-and-play, sexy, user-centric accounting. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? We believe we know that if you leverage proactively then you may also enable virtually. If you productize globally, you may have to deliver extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? We think that most six-sigma, blog-based web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. We understand that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also brand nano-perfectly. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned 24/7, ubiquitous media sourcing, C2C2C, customer-defined research and development are forced to become C2C2C. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XSL.