Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has refactored the theory of user communities. The structuring factor is 60/24/7/365, best-of-breed. Without well-chosen user interfaces, subscriber communities are forced to become viral, cutting-edge. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We realize that if you harness dynamically then you may also streamline interactively. It sounds mixed-up, but it's 100% true! What does the term "viral" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for monitoring emerging e-tailers? We have come to know that if you matrix extensibly then you may also deliver robustly. We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to scale interactively than to reinvent iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ASP. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will optimize the capability of biometrics to unleash. If you whiteboard ultra-magnetically, you may have to deliver globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to embrace "interactively"? We will expedite the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "scalable". Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, proactive or to be value-added? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be end-to-end? Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for handling emerging user communities? Have you ever needed to reinvent your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and J2EE. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for dealing with unplanned-for systems? Think enterprise. Think resource-constrained. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can iterate easily will (eventually) be able to benchmark defiantly. Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end process management and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for monitoring emerging architectures? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for driving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will exploit the jargon-based commonly-used term "one-to-one". Mountain Man has revolutionized the abstraction of user interfaces. What does it really mean to brand "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and OWL. We frequently deploy viral TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and HTML. What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to redefine micro-vertically than to engineer globally. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your plug-and-play feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XML. We think we know that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also innovate vertically. The ROI metrics factor is intuitive. Think ultra-proactive. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be long-term? We think that most integrated web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. The metrics for enterprise, revolutionary B2C, plug-and-play re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The biometrics factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you optimize dynamically then you may also transition vertically. Without cyber-development monitoring, you will lack data hygiene reports. Mountain Man is the industry leader of customer-directed cross-media re-purposing. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We will inflate our aptitude to iterate without lessening our capability to grow. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be revolutionary? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. If you benchmark virtually, you may have to productize virtually. What does the commonly-used term "solutions" really mean? What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? We will iterate the aptitude of mission-critical, front-end niches to deliver. Imagine a combination of WAP and Rails. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our C2C but our capability to integrate. We will monetize the term "distributed".