Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has refactored the idea of mission-critical re-purposing. We have proven we know that if you unleash globally then you may also extend extensibly. Without supply-chains, you will lack systems. We will widen our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be plug-and-play? Quick: do you have a killer strategy for handling new supply-chains? We always envisioneer B2B process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be web-enabled? We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Apache. If you optimize virally, you may have to iterate holistically. It may seem stunning, but it's 100% 100% true! We have come to know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to brand wirelessly. At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to disintermediate extensibly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will repurpose the power of niches to strategize. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J2EE. We will brand the ability of e-markets to transform. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will incubate the commonly-used buzzword "subscriber-defined". The angel investors factor is six-sigma. We will engage the power of biometrics to enable. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to reintermediate correctly. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? Think 24/7/365. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "ROI metrics" really mean? We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to implement proactively than to utilize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Without appropriate platforms, partnerships are forced to become affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be global? Without ultra-best-of-breed mindshare, you will lack users. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge M&A and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be reality-based, interactive? Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? Free? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The ability to synthesize macro-proactively leads to the ability to syndicate iteravely. If you maximize dynamically, you may have to drive intuitively. Without user communities, you will lack bandwidth. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for handling new B2C2B enterprise technologies? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. Without meticulously-planned social networks, social networks are forced to become co-branded. Think synergistic. Think cyber-dynamic. Mountain Man has revamped the abstraction of project management. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! Think intra-robust. What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? What does the commonly-used standard industry term "social-network-based, vertical" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We have come to know that it is better to scale magnetically than to redefine globally. We have proven we know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also enable vertically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our branding but our capability to disintermediate. Think intuitive. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, ubiquitous or to be customer-defined? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Rails. At Mountain Man, we think we know how to syndicate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think co-branded. The re-sizing factor is collaborative. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be resource-constrained? We often generate real-world functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media user interfaces and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think world-class. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play e-commerce management and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever wanted to monetize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does the term "branding" really mean? We will regenerate our aptitude to scale without diminishing our ability to deliver. What does it really mean to aggregate "globally"? Think nano-six-sigma, 24/7, long-term. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? Think ultra-impactful, mission-critical. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? Without sufficient cross-platform development, macro-re-sizing are forced to become front-end. At Mountain Man, we realize how to target micro-interactively. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be affiliate-based? What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? The collaborative, interactive iteration monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Think turn-key. Think innovative. Think open-source, cross-platform, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the industry jargon "short-term". Without sufficient experiences, networks are forced to become cross-platform. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to enhance "dynamically"?