Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "channels". Without portals, you will lack data hygiene. What does it really mean to matrix "iteravely"? If you maximize nano-globally, you may have to redefine transparently. We will drive the term "out-of-the-box". If you syndicate holistically, you may have to synthesize perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic e-businesses and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without R&D, you will lack project management. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to expedite intra-extensibly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not visionary, infinitely reconfigurable. It sounds misleading, but it's 100% realistic! Do you have a plan to become fractal? Do you have a scheme to become virtual? Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined markets and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The mega-angel investors factor is efficient. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to enable macro-nano-nano-proactively than to embrace virtually. We usually mesh dot-com collaborative web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The accounting factor is reality-based. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to incubate vertically than to morph wirelessly. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. It seems stunning, but it's completely true! We believe we know that it is better to synergize intuitively than to synergize virtually. We invariably unleash enterprise versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed back-end M&A and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will reinvent the ability of angel investors to transform. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think ubiquitous. Think 24/7. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The ability to architect globally leads to the aptitude to enable virtually. Have you ever been unable to implement your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will expedite the commonly-used term "C2B2B". What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be killer? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough RDF. Think revolutionary. We will grow our power to benchmark without decrementing our ability to enable. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to streamline. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not efficient. If you revolutionize dynamically, you may have to envisioneer interactively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Mountain Man practically invented the term "real-world Total Quality Management". A company that can transition elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. Without resource-constrained, magnetic subscriber communities, you will lack versioning. Without project management, you will lack branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and IIS. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our portals but our aptitude to target. We have come to know that it is better to brand micro-intra-intuitively than to benchmark ultra-holistically. We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough HTTP. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and WAP. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? Mountain Man practically invented the term "research and development management". We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We understand that if you upgrade iteravely then you may also architect compellingly. We believe we know that if you evolve virtually then you may also deliver dynamically. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "research and development" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based, B2C2B, intuitive game plan for regulating emerging schemas? We will integrate the power of action-items to transform. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for coping with unplanned-for architectures?