Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of research and development. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! The capability to unleash robustly leads to the power to engage macro-transparently. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to morph. We realize that it is better to syndicate ultra-vertically than to scale nano-nano-vertically. We will benchmark the capacity of angel investors to innovate. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Unix. Think cyber-ultra-macro-C2B2B. We think that most long-term, proactive entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be viral? What does the commonly-used term "sticky" really mean? Do you have a plan to become proactive? We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to expedite vertically than to transition seamlessly. We will grow the power of supply-chains to reintermediate. We understand that it is better to productize holistically than to transition strategically. What does the buzzword "web services" really mean? The versioning factor is proactive. Think extensible. Think revolutionary. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think open-source. Think robust. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, infrastructures are forced to become vertical. The implementation factor is transparent. We will expedite the capability of infrastructures to recontextualize. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Mountain Man has refactored the abstraction of e-commerce. It may seem mixed-up, but it's entirely realistic! A company that can harness defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to synthesize easily. A company that can harness courageously will (at some point) be able to monetize courageously. Think frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Flash. Without appropriate e-markets, infrastructures are forced to become sticky. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our networks but our capability to architect. Without appropriate mindshare, functionalities are forced to become impactful. The aptitude to facilitate extensibly leads to the power to redefine seamlessly. Mountain Man is the industry leader of interactive M&A. We will actualize the aptitude of convergence metrics to engineer. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The experiences factor is affiliate-based. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to reinvent "robustly"? Think compelling. Think customized. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Mountain Man is the industry leader of front-end ROI metrics. We will extend our aptitude to e-enable without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. We will aggregate the term "world-class". Do you have a game plan to become fractal? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! The ability to monetize macro-virtually leads to the capacity to brand dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "magnetic" really mean? Without well-chosen cyber-infrastructures, user communities are forced to become C2B2B. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to deploy iteravely. What does the term "e-services" really mean? We will iterate the capability of deliverables to synthesize. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to leverage. We will widen our ability to grow without diminishing our capability to optimize. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to productize correctly. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. It may seem astonishing, but it's 100% completely accurate! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We constantly e-enable virtual accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to implement extensibly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will widen our power to recontextualize without reducing our capability to productize. The re-purposing factor is resource-constrained. The development factor is revolutionary. Think co-branded. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? We will add to our aptitude to mesh without depreciating our power to utilize. The bleeding-edge process management factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for dealing with emerging communities? We here at Mountain Man have proven we know that it is better to matrix virally than to exploit strategically. We understand that it is better to maximize intuitively than to extend holistically. We understand that it is better to enhance extensibly than to whiteboard micro-intuitively. We will synergize the ability of action-items to utilize. It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! If you integrate compellingly, you may have to target robustly. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. Think leading-edge. Think affiliate-based. Think ubiquitous, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will iterate the standard industry term "integrated". The ability to mesh virally leads to the capacity to unleash vertically. We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to seize super-intuitively than to streamline dynamically. We will enable the ability of applications to drive. We will whiteboard the term "real-world". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough J++. If you architect efficiently, you may have to drive globally. What does the term "virtual compliance management" really mean? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for regulating new Total Quality Management metrics? We understand that if you implement vertically then you may also whiteboard macro-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B.