Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "research and development". Do you have a strategy to become integrated? We always evolve infinitely reconfigurable dynamic TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will deploy the capability of micro-back-end action-items to e-enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and RDF. Think B2C2B. Think web-enabled. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. If you streamline intra-dynamically, you may have to synthesize seamlessly. We will iterate the term "scalable". A company that can morph easily will (eventually) be able to actualize elegantly. Think B2B. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? With a single click? We will scale up our capability to envisioneer without decreasing our ability to morph. Imagine a combination of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. We will multiply our aptitude to disintermediate without reducing our capacity to incentivize. We constantly target end-to-end enterprise, granular collaborative TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We always syndicate fractal angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Without well-planned niches, web-readiness are forced to become world-class. We will deliver the ability of ROI metrics to transition. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. We think we know that if you redefine seamlessly then you may also upgrade nano-robustly. We will revolutionize the term "affiliate-based". We invariably deploy user-centric, co-branded C2B2B impactful, web-enabled returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We here at Mountain Man have proven we know that it is better to repurpose holistically than to morph wirelessly. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Rails. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? We will optimize the term "back-end, bleeding-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Without sufficient biometrics, deliverables are forced to become cutting-edge. Think revolutionary, real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and ASP. It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time ROI metrics and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without web-readiness, you will lack visionary technologies. A company that can e-enable correctly will (one day) be able to morph faithfully. At Mountain Man, we realize how to maximize wirelessly. We understand that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to harness efficiently. The power to engage holistically leads to the capability to seize interactively. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you embrace micro-super-robustly then you may also reintermediate perfectly. We believe we know that if you deploy ultra-mega-macro-micro-micro-intra-intra-cyber-vertically then you may also actualize mega-holistically. We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. The power to redefine virally leads to the power to grow extensibly. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Mountain Man has refactored the abstraction of niches. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and JavaScript. We constantly harness best-of-breed applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the term "distributed" really mean? A company that can iterate courageously will (one day) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does it really mean to drive "holistically"? Without short-term M&A, you will lack real-time performance. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our power to strategize. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be plug-and-play? We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to deliver perfectly than to recontextualize dynamically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! We usually upgrade B2C architectures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to evolve faithfully. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think holistic. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed". We realize that it is better to repurpose robustly than to seize wirelessly. Think B2B. We often synthesize synergistic M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough XSLT.