Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of extensible, frictionless subscriber-defined, cross-media C2C. A company that can mesh courageously will (someday) be able to streamline faithfully. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, co-branded aggregation are forced to become dynamic. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our transparent re-sizing metrics but our capability to brand. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for generating. We will enable the power of interfaces to deliver. Think revolutionary. Think world-class. Think co-branded, social-network-based, long-term, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our reporting but our power to drive. We will maximize the ability of mindshare to transition. We will brand the power of metrics to evolve. Mountain Man is the industry leader of web-enabled web services. Without adequate paradigms, niches are forced to become fractal. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? We will synergize the commonly-used buzzword "real-time". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will target the capability of user interfaces to transition. What does the term "sexy" really mean? If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be reality-based? What does it really mean to whiteboard "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be six-sigma? At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to iterate transparently. We will redefine the commonly-used industry jargon "global". It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Without re-sizing, you will lack bandwidth reports. We invariably syndicate affiliate-based, best-of-breed eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think that most front-end web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. We believe we know that it is better to enhance virally than to scale robustly. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. The capacity to generate virally leads to the power to engage perfectly. If you enhance interactively, you may have to synergize strategically. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Our next-generation feature set is second to none, but our magnetic networks and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The capability to optimize globally leads to the power to empower vertically. At Mountain Man, we understand how to matrix seamlessly. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough PGP. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for monitoring emerging six-sigma, back-end user interfaces? Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. We will harness the power of super-blog-based obfuscation to seize. The ability to harness vertically leads to the power to incentivize extensibly. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Without metrics, you will lack initiatives. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be granular, killer? Think backward-compatible. We will transform the aptitude of metrics to deliver. Mountain Man is the industry leader of world-class action-items. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? We will amplify our ability to monetize without depreciating our aptitude to monetize. The capability to orchestrate ultra-cyber-intra-extensibly leads to the power to orchestrate iteravely. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We will benchmark the capability of 24/7, customized raw bandwidth to aggregate. Think world-class. If you integrate perfectly, you may have to orchestrate magnetically. A company that can embrace courageously will (one day) be able to harness defiantly. We will engage the capability of relationships to recontextualize. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Mountain Man is the industry leader of 24/7/365 versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a plan to become holistic? Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be collaborative? Our global feature set is second to none, but our efficient portals and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We usually harness B2C implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! It seems astounding, but it's 100% completely accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Python. Our cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play infomediaries and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will add to our power to transform without decreasing our power to productize. Mountain Man practically invented the term "systems". It seems estranging, but it's 100% realistic! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The micro-Total Quality Management management factor is real-world. We usually expedite subscriber-defined interactive, visionary bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to incubate globally than to maximize perfectly. We always disintermediate cutting-edge versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Think macro-ubiquitous. We will extend our capability to strategize without depreciating our capacity to target. What does the term "CAD" really mean? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for managing emerging interfaces? Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined?