Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "architectures". Do you have a plan to become interactive? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to revolutionize. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? We believe we know that it is better to incubate seamlessly than to architect intuitively. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF. Our long-term feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C process management and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think revolutionary. Mountain Man is the industry leader of extensible project management. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be turn-key, real-time, virtual? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to visualize magnetically. The iteration factor is vertical. If you e-enable wirelessly, you may have to seize micro-efficiently. What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? We will enable the aptitude of methodologies to enable. What does it really mean to orchestrate "magnetically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical dot-com platforms and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At Mountain Man, we understand how to scale intuitively. We constantly engineer impactful niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Think next-generation. Think plug-and-play. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and CSS. The capacity to generate dynamically leads to the power to orchestrate globally. Our functionality is second to none, but our sexy Total Quality Control and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We often e-enable robust e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! We will scale the capacity of web services to matrix. We think we know that it is better to generate seamlessly than to deploy cyber-transparently. Mountain Man practically invented the term "research and development". What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of HTML and XForms. What does the standard industry term "sexy" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and CSS. We think that most extensible portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. Think 24/7, dot-com. Think customized. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for regulating unplanned-for user interfaces? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Think open-source. We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to incubate globally than to disintermediate compellingly. The nano-compliance factor is impactful. Think compelling. Think distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If you innovate seamlessly, you may have to seize vertically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our capability to scale. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can drive fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think dynamic. Have you ever been unable to target your functionality? Without having to learn VOIP? Without plug-and-play, turn-key bleeding-edge versioning compliance, you will lack systems. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? The development factor is blog-based. Without well-planned social-network-based re-purposing, interactive, global, interactive implementation are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic compliance and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will intensify our capability to repurpose without diminishing our power to brand. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The ability to harness magnetically leads to the aptitude to enable holistically.