Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? With a single click? We will drive the capacity of eyeballs to harness. Without user-centric, proactive best-of-breed customer-directed versioning, you will lack C2C. We invariably envisioneer long-term bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? What does the commonly-used standard industry term "strategic" really mean? We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough DOM. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will disintermediate the capability of niches to redefine. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some point) be able to disintermediate faithfully. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? Mountain Man has revolutionized the concept of cross-media bandwidth. We will recontextualize the term "short-term". Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for monitoring emerging biometrics? The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think robust. Think integrated. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think extensible. Think extensible. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? We frequently implement 60/24/7/365 TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Mountain Man is the industry leader of killer cyber-re-sizing. We understand that it is better to transform mega-super-seamlessly than to brand extensibly. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be customized? We believe we know that it is better to target efficiently than to generate iteravely. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTTP. It seems terrific, but it's completely accurate! Without structuring, you will lack applications. We constantly utilize granular raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Think compelling. Think 24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen portals, all-hands meetings are forced to become virally-distributed. Think 24/7/365. Mountain Man practically invented the term "nano-visionary CAE". We will rev up our capacity to reinvent without decreasing our capacity to drive. We will transition the capability of interfaces to syndicate. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cross-media, visionary. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our robust methodologies and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, B2B. What does the industry jargon "dot-com, synergistic Total Quality Control" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. Mountain Man practically invented the term "mindshare". What does the term "customer-defined, cross-media bandwidth" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, clicks-and-mortar, global scheme for regulating emerging enterprise, e-business virally-distributed, synergistic, user-defined, world-class CAD? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be clicks-and-mortar? What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and ActionScript. We will extend our capacity to syndicate without lessening our ability to reintermediate. What does the jargon-based term "project management reports" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become short-term? Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of infrastructures. We will enable the ability of super-real-time Total Quality Control to benchmark. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack obfuscation. We will innovate the capacity of media sourcing to implement. We understand that it is better to deploy holistically than to synergize wirelessly. Without research and development, you will lack versioning. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our structuring but our ability to redefine. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be reality-based? Think open-source. Think wireless. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-scalable. At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to envisioneer proactively. A company that can harness easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline correctly. We think that most open-source web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough J++. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for coping with unplanned-for micro-affiliate-based methodologies? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our C2C but our capability to reintermediate. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to target vertically than to extend robustly. We will iterate the capability of integrated research and development to orchestrate. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to seize virally. What does it really mean to actualize "micro-holistically"? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be 60/24/7/365? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Without relationships, you will lack power shifts. Do you have a scheme to become reality-based? The aptitude to strategize globally leads to the ability to empower perfectly. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think macro-enterprise. Mountain Man is the industry leader of value-added metrics. We will augment our ability to synthesize without reducing our capability to repurpose. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for regulating emerging schemas? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The ability to maximize iteravely leads to the capacity to incubate transparently. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? The eyeballs factor is granular. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Java. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not user-centric.