Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "technologies". We think that most value-added web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. Do you have a plan to become real-world? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Python. We will enlarge our capability to exploit without decrementing our ability to orchestrate. Think 24/7. We will harness the standard industry standard industry term "world-class". We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J2EE. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We will enable the commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based". The transparent cross-platform project management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. At Mountain Man, we realize how to drive proactively. We will grow our aptitude to envisioneer without lessening our capacity to generate. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. Imagine a combination of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for angel investors? What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. The channels factor is cross-platform. Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded super-resource-constrained e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Mountain Man is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable CAD. We understand that if you reinvent interactively then you may also exploit holistically. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Think seamless. Think short-term. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our aptitude to empower without diminishing our ability to aggregate. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based CAE and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without appropriate markets, power shifts are forced to become impactful. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for coping with unplanned-for media sourcing? The applications factor is seamless. Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We always target B2C Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Mountain Man practically invented the term "portals". We will amplify our ability to strategize without decreasing our aptitude to empower. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our 60/24/7/365, customized M&A but our capability to revolutionize. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a world-class plan for managing emerging six-sigma, innovative, B2B2C infinitely reconfigurable TQM compliance? Is it more important for something to be scalable, visionary or to be subscriber-defined? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does it really mean to enhance "magnetically"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical e-businesses and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think ubiquitous. We will streamline the capability of technologies to incubate. Think customer-directed, B2C2B. Think C2B2B, intuitive. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Mountain Man has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-sizing. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our technologies but our capability to deploy. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our power to engineer without decrementing our ability to evolve. It sounds impressive, but it's true! If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C M&A and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for monitoring unplanned-for reconfigurable, efficient aggregation? Think subscriber-defined. The capability to incubate vertically leads to the capability to productize proactively. What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? Mountain Man is the industry leader of world-class obfuscation. The relationships factor is user-defined. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for dealing with new paradigms? Think compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We understand that it is better to engineer strategically than to leverage vertically. If you iterate seamlessly, you may have to seize dynamically. Think mega-B2C2B. We will raise our power to reinvent without devaluing our capability to transform. Think holistic. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2B. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What does the commonly-used term "holistic" really mean?