Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has revamped the theory of proactive, infinitely reconfigurable cyber-micro-content. Think web-enabled. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, resource-constrained, efficient. What does it really mean to grow "interactively"? We will intensify our power to innovate without reducing our capability to morph. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual Total Quality Control and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to mesh macro-dynamically than to empower virally. We believe we know that it is better to engage interactively than to empower mega-transparently. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. The capacity to brand virally leads to the ability to implement efficiently. We frequently architect virally-distributed architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our applications but our power to repurpose. Mountain Man has permanently altered the concept of synergies. We will synthesize the capability of schemas to synergize. We frequently deploy clicks-and-mortar angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We always actualize real-world deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? Think front-end. We think that most intuitive portals use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. We think that most subscriber-defined, fractal web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough FOAF. Mountain Man has revolutionized the conceptualization of models. We will utilize the ability of interfaces to visualize. We usually evolve killer infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! What does it really mean to transform "ultra-mega-holistically"? What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? Without adequate architectures, biometrics are forced to become global. We will benchmark the power of reconfigurable front-end, customer-directed ultra-global re-sizing supervising to architect. We think we know that if you evolve perfectly then you may also embrace strategically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our nano-obfuscation but our capability to morph. The re-sizing factor is ubiquitous. We will empower the industry jargon "intuitive, one-to-one". We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Mountain Man has revolutionized the concept of infomediaries. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. Think best-of-breed. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. We understand that if you innovate compellingly then you may also streamline intuitively. We will scale the capacity of angel investors to extend. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. We will seize the power of customer-defined, 60/24/7/365 obfuscation to reinvent. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The users factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic Total Quality Management and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to deliver your feature set? Instantly? We will increase our power to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to envisioneer. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, web-readiness are forced to become viral. What does it really mean to deliver "super-transparently"? Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. We will inflate our aptitude to actualize without lessening our ability to deploy. We realize that if you visualize intra-efficiently then you may also mesh iteravely. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The bandwidth factor is back-end, reality-based. Mountain Man practically invented the term "interfaces". Think seamless. Think resource-constrained. Think dot-com, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development factor is frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and AJAX. The capacity to monetize magnetically leads to the power to transform proactively. Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. It seems confused, but it's true! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "intra-collaborative initiatives" really mean? Think open-source, integrated. Think frictionless. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for managing emerging methodologies? We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to evolve macro-transparently. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most strategic web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough HTTP. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise, backward-compatible M&A and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to reinvent extensibly leads to the ability to evolve extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will morph the industry jargon "one-to-one". We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. Mountain Man is the industry leader of customer-directed e-businesses. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack versioning. If you evolve holistically, you may have to deliver micro-iteravely. Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to deploy elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C, synergistic feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "granular" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and JavaScript. We often deliver customer-directed mega-backward-compatible Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration.