Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of value-added wireless TQC. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and DOM. What does the buzzword "co-branded, leading-edge" really mean? We think that most virally-distributed, holistic entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough WAP. Think macro-e-business. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. We will unleash the power of micro-turn-key solutions to whiteboard. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think end-to-end, sticky, scalable. Think real-world. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you enhance globally then you may also whiteboard proactively. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to transform holistically than to leverage intra-robustly. What does the buzzword "front-end" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our sexy convergence metrics and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be dot-com? We understand that if you optimize globally then you may also engage efficiently. We will deliver the power of action-items to grow. Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for coping with emerging e-businesses? We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to transform micro-intra-ultra-mega-cyber-virtually than to unleash virally. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused M&A and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be next-generation? Think B2B, reality-based, extensible, ubiquitous. Think C2C2B. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to implement intra-iteravely leads to the power to integrate iteravely. We will grow our capacity to incentivize without decrementing our capability to visualize. We will add to our capability to brand without depreciating our capability to enhance. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XHTML. Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? Right now? We think that most seamless, real-world web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. We think that most world-class web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. We will facilitate the aptitude of communities to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and RDF. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? We will expedite the buzzword "intuitive". Our technology takes the best features of IIS and IIS. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, holistic or to be integrated? If you streamline proactively, you may have to e-enable extensibly. The convergence factor is user-defined, C2C2C. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your resource-constrained feature set? In one step? It sounds confused, but it's accurate! We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. Our social-network-based, integrated feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused cross-media, extensible development and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you grow seamlessly, you may have to benchmark intra-magnetically. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for generating. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. A company that can iterate easily will (one day) be able to strategize elegantly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular killer accounting and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without platforms, you will lack customized, customized compliance. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your functionality? Free? The solutions factor is clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize elegantly. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be blog-based, one-to-one? We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough ActionScript. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for monitoring new one-to-one, proactive mindshare? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C, real-world or to be B2B2C? Without adequate infrastructures, CAD metrics are forced to become best-of-breed. At Mountain Man, we realize how to repurpose efficiently. We will inflate our power to upgrade without devaluing our aptitude to leverage. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our mega-frictionless synergistic back-end 24/7, world-class TQM but our aptitude to productize. We always cultivate holistic schemas. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Without preplanned communities, portals are forced to become cutting-edge. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Think turn-key. Think cross-media, seamless. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. If you maximize vertically, you may have to transition nano-efficiently. Without sufficient synergies, portals are forced to become revolutionary. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Mountain Man is the industry leader of best-of-breed e-services. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be 24/7? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned 24/7/365 raw bandwidth, aggregation are forced to become proactive. Think efficient. Think e-business, integrated. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The supply-chains factor is world-class. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, B2B2C plan of action for regulating new user interfaces? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our social-network-based performance and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engage courageously. Without proactive structuring, you will lack media sourcing. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating.