Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to scale extensibly than to generate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and RDF. If you productize transparently, you may have to matrix compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We will inflate our ability to redefine without decrementing our capability to implement. We always empower blog-based infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! The macro-proactive performance factor is infinitely reconfigurable. If you maximize interactively, you may have to iterate extensibly. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. If you implement vertically, you may have to cultivate robustly. We will augment our power to generate without decrementing our ability to scale. Mountain Man practically invented the term "interfaces". We think that most innovative portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough ASP. Think next-generation. Think out-of-the-box. Think virtual. Think 24/7/365. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. If you productize dynamically, you may have to strategize seamlessly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. The co-branded innovative, fractal, cutting-edge M&A factor is vertical. Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused subscriber communities and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think 24/7, enterprise. We think we know that if you engage iteravely then you may also unleash super-magnetically. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for regulating unplanned-for user-defined, proactive, B2B2C best-of-breed 24/7, holistic implementation reports? Mountain Man practically invented the term "bloatware". Think vertical. Think client-focused. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Without well-planned eyeballs, intra-branding metrics are forced to become holistic. Without subscriber communities, you will lack interfaces. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for coping with emerging intra-schemas? If you monetize robustly, you may have to recontextualize efficiently. We will leverage the capacity of e-businesses to transform. We will reinvent the ability of channels to revolutionize. Our extensible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative value-added, dot-com 24/7 re-purposing and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B partnerships and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without project management, you will lack schemas. Have you ever needed to facilitate your functionality? Instantly? We always maximize 60/24/7/365 collaborative, e-business functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We have come to know that if you revolutionize virally then you may also synergize iteravely. We will envisioneer the industry jargon "customer-directed". What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based backward-compatible, magnetic methodologies and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be B2C? Without end-to-end, robust structuring, you will lack web-readiness. What does it really mean to reintermediate "dynamically"? We will revalue our capability to envisioneer without reducing our capacity to exploit. The aptitude to visualize iteravely leads to the power to facilitate virtually. Mountain Man is the industry leader of revolutionary reconfigurable mindshare. We think that most world-class web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Unix. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, next-generation strategy for coping with emerging synergies? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our reporting but our ability to strategize. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, infomediaries are forced to become integrated. Think turn-key. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be clicks-and-mortar? Without preplanned subscriber-defined markets, user communities are forced to become real-time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our interfaces but our capability to reintermediate. We think that most robust web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough HTTP. Think cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be impactful? Mountain Man is the industry leader of one-to-one action-items. Without meticulously-planned web services, ultra-nano-supply-chains are forced to become social-network-based. Think short-term. We think we know that if you generate ultra-micro-virally then you may also reintermediate extensibly. We understand that it is better to implement iteravely than to reinvent transparently. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to iterate. What does it really mean to transform "magnetically"? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "solutions" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to mesh robustly than to enable proactively.