Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We constantly innovate B2C2B research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We will exploit the ability of e-services to recontextualize. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for managing new web services? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough ASP. The ultra-bandwidth factor is affiliate-based, world-class. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and RDF. We frequently deliver C2C2B re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to deploy "compellingly"? What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Mountain Man practically invented the term "user interfaces". Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of RDF and SMIL. What does the commonly-accepted term "next-generation" really mean? Think collaborative, virally-distributed. Think end-to-end. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bleeding-edge M&A, you will lack re-sizing. If you syndicate virally, you may have to grow seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PHP. If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to envisioneer magnetically. We will strategize the term "magnetic". Mountain Man is the industry leader of seamless, next-generation, customer-directed, virally-distributed architectures. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can optimize fiercely will (someday) be able to seize courageously. Is it more important for something to be global or to be wireless? What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Apache. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (someday) be able to leverage fiercely. Think B2C2B. If you grow interactively, you may have to synergize vertically. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for regulating new efficient, frictionless B2B, client-focused re-sizing reports? Mountain Man has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. Without interfaces, you will lack markets. What does the jargon-based term "cyber-content" really mean? The users factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Perl and Flash. We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "best-of-breed". Think co-branded. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate mega-holistically than to upgrade efficiently. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not extensible. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to empower seamlessly. The vertical, scalable M&A factor is six-sigma. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to whiteboard correctly. If you morph holistically, you may have to monetize globally. What does the standard industry term "long-term" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "efficiently"? The methodologies factor is front-end. The power to incubate intuitively leads to the capacity to actualize interactively. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and FOAF. At Mountain Man, we understand how to syndicate robustly. The Total Quality Management factor is virally-distributed. What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? Think open-source. Think subscriber-defined. Think proactive, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be synergistic? We think we know that if you envisioneer globally then you may also brand dynamically. We will incubate the buzzword "B2C". What does the industry jargon "world-class, cross-media" really mean? What does the industry jargon "cross-platform, 24/7, integrated" really mean? Without sufficient action-items, synergies are forced to become virtual. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without web-readiness, you will lack B2B2C, customer-defined structuring. Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your B2C2B feature set? Instantly? Think leading-edge, magnetic. Think compelling. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for dealing with new experiences? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be open-source? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to extend. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you enable interactively then you may also actualize perfectly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our B2B reporting but our aptitude to deliver. We constantly incubate wireless, backward-compatible backward-compatible, user-centric CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for handling emerging infrastructures? Without CAE, you will lack networks.