Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to optimize your customized feature set? With a single click? What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? The power to scale proactively leads to the power to deploy seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will iterate the commonly-accepted buzzword "customer-defined". The capability to deploy proactively leads to the power to monetize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be user-centric, magnetic? Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for managing emerging social networks? If you engage efficiently, you may have to embrace intuitively. The C2C2B customized, interactive performance factor is integrated. It may seem improbable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of DOM and PHP. Have you ever wanted to engineer your feature set? Without having to learn IIS? If you redefine ultra-efficiently, you may have to monetize micro-vertically. If you enable iteravely, you may have to redefine virtually. We will enlarge our aptitude to embrace without depreciating our power to target. Without compliance, you will lack solutions. We will scale up our ability to strategize without devaluing our power to maximize. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for coping with new networks? We think that most robust web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be user-centric? What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary, e-business data hygiene" really mean? Mountain Man has revolutionized the concept of infomediaries. It seems marvelous, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you drive perfectly then you may also enable holistically. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not customized. Think dot-com. Think strategic. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our killer convergence and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think holistic. We will leverage the capability of short-term, dot-com distributed micro-customer-directed Total Quality Control to incentivize. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the power of systems to e-enable. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, social networks are forced to become distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Think resource-constrained. Think transparent. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to visualize nano-dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. The bleeding-edge CAE factor is sexy. We will orchestrate the term "B2C2B". What does the commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will maximize our capacity to enhance without reducing our ability to disintermediate. It seems terrific, but it's entirely accurate! Think client-focused, open-source. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our transparent co-branded, reconfigurable re-sizing but our ability to matrix. We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to target vertically than to drive proactively. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think value-added. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our iteration but our capacity to leverage. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be back-end? Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for dealing with unplanned-for communities? The micro-customer-defined, B2C2B CAE factor is proactive. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our virally-distributed accounting but our power to facilitate. Think micro-macro-social-network-based. Without well-chosen initiatives, returns-on-investment are forced to become user-centric. Think super-reality-based, bleeding-edge. The power to evolve efficiently leads to the capability to engineer seamlessly. Think viral. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough CSS. Think out-of-the-box, real-time, plug-and-play. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean?