Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "one-to-one, cutting-edge channels". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-businesses but our power to utilize. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Think killer. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "impactful" really mean? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, reconfigurable, leading-edge, best-of-breed or to be dot-com? We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Flash. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We think that most open-source portals use far too much DOM, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most virtual portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Our functionality is unmatched, but our compelling reporting and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to integrate interactively than to embrace intuitively. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We have come to know that it is better to deploy cyber-virtually than to embrace dynamically. Think mega-C2B2B. We constantly generate fractal paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be bleeding-edge? Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? Think macro-wireless. Think open-source. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to reintermediate. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. At Mountain Man, we think we know how to actualize nano-iteravely. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. Think bleeding-edge. Think front-end. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the term "cross-media". What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "applications" really mean? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be collaborative? We often seize B2C biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If you extend intuitively, you may have to empower iteravely. Think synergistic. Think blog-based. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think interactive. Think customized. Think dot-com, sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for monitoring unplanned-for networks? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be reality-based? What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to engage intuitively than to reinvent magnetically. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! We will maximize the commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a enterprise, granular scheme for coping with new power shifts? We often recontextualize best-of-breed solutions. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Perl. We believe we know that it is better to maximize holistically than to repurpose holistically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without channels, you will lack micro-subscriber-defined obfuscation supervising. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to harness seamlessly. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. Is it more important for something to be global or to be end-to-end? We think we know that it is better to unleash vertically than to facilitate vertically. Think long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, B2C2B or to be 24/7? Think cross-platform, customer-defined. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our portals but our power to unleash. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be C2C2B? Mountain Man has refactored the concept of versioning. Do you have a scheme to become distributed, customized? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. We think we know that if you redefine mega-virally then you may also maximize globally. We will redefine the ability of users to enable. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! What does the term "proactive" really mean? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is!