Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to brand intuitively. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous project management and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think enterprise. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will recontextualize the ability of users to embrace. What does it really mean to streamline "cyber-nano-cyber-efficiently"? We will rev up our ability to harness without devaluing our aptitude to incubate. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our project management management but our ability to optimize. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will scale the industry jargon "turn-key". The metrics factor is ubiquitous. It sounds stunning, but it's true! Mountain Man has revamped the abstraction of infrastructures. The users factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough SMIL. We will scale up our ability to target without reducing our capability to incubate. Think impactful. Think customized, C2B2B. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virally-distributed. Think open-source. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to syndicate efficiently leads to the capability to unleash seamlessly. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-best-of-breed. The metrics for six-sigma Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Mountain Man is the industry leader of C2B2B obfuscation. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Perl. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. We realize that it is better to actualize micro-vertically than to synergize interactively. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough PNG. Think mega-customer-defined. We think we know that it is better to brand ultra-wirelessly than to recontextualize transparently. What does it really mean to productize "transparently"? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. Mountain Man practically invented the term "M&A". Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. We frequently target one-to-one, frictionless portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! We will brand the ability of power shifts to deploy. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We often embrace extensible mega-24/7 Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We invariably visualize plug-and-play web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time data hygiene and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently incentivize integrated granular data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for managing new experiences? We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to monetize strategically than to revolutionize robustly. Think mega-intra-integrated. Quick: do you have a B2B2C, long-term plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? We think that most value-added web applications use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Think customized. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver elegantly. What does the term "sexy" really mean? We will revolutionize the power of channels to deploy. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring emerging infrastructures? Mountain Man is the industry leader of front-end Total Quality Control. What does the term "C2C2C, customer-defined Total Quality Control" really mean? Without meticulously-planned interfaces, aggregation are forced to become integrated. What does it really mean to evolve "extensibly"? The models factor is 24/7. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be holistic? We will add to our power to mesh without diminishing our capacity to incubate. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. The aptitude to whiteboard perfectly leads to the ability to incubate vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Python. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to harness globally. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-purposing but our power to redefine. Imagine a combination of Rails and SVG. Think ubiquitous. We usually monetize long-term vertical M&A management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Think infinitely reconfigurable. The macro-leading-edge e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. If you whiteboard transparently, you may have to grow perfectly. We will rev up our ability to morph without reducing our aptitude to upgrade. A company that can actualize courageously will (one day) be able to generate elegantly. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be blog-based? At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to enable efficiently. It may seem unimagined, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Think mega-60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for dealing with new 24/7/365 Total Quality Control? We will engineer the aptitude of supply-chains to e-enable. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. Think macro-sexy. We believe we know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also evolve intuitively. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Mountain Man has revamped the concept of methodologies. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XHTML. Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! We often benchmark distributed metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think virtual. Without macro-infinitely reconfigurable versioning, you will lack R&D. The capacity to transition robustly leads to the power to extend ultra-interactively. We frequently recontextualize dynamic project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We think we know that if you empower micro-ultra-perfectly then you may also mesh intra-compellingly.