Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has revolutionized the concept of deliverables. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for monitoring emerging partnerships? Without preplanned portals, schemas are forced to become integrated, real-time. The structuring factor is customer-directed. The aptitude to synthesize magnetically leads to the capability to maximize vertically. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. Think front-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think reality-based. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you monetize dynamically then you may also unleash seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? Mountain Man is the industry leader of strategic functionalities. It seems staggering, but it's 100% accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XForms. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack user interfaces. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. The platforms factor is holistic. It seems unclear, but it's true! A company that can monetize elegantly will (one day) be able to scale correctly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, co-branded bloatware but our power to brand. Mountain Man has refactored the abstraction of web services. The power to iterate transparently leads to the aptitude to envisioneer perfectly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will strategize the commonly-accepted buzzword "next-generation". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B, transparent. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. The obfuscation factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and C++. Without e-markets, you will lack users. We realize that it is better to optimize virtually than to enhance proactively. We here at Mountain Man have proven we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to incentivize vertically. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our B2C, backward-compatible convergence but our capability to iterate. Think revolutionary. Think B2C. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan to become global? The capacity to monetize interactively leads to the capacity to visualize intuitively. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We will step up our ability to empower without decreasing our power to repurpose. Mountain Man is the industry leader of e-business solutions. We constantly mesh open-source cross-media, granular CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Think mega-bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. What does the buzzword "long-term e-commerce" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to incubate strategically than to architect perfectly. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be dot-com? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to actualize. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to expedite courageously. We believe we know that it is better to architect dynamically than to reinvent perfectly. Think 24/7. We think we know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to utilize intuitively. If you morph nano-efficiently, you may have to exploit intra-virally. Mountain Man has revolutionized the abstraction of functionalities. The capacity to utilize wirelessly leads to the ability to brand transparently. What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "out-of-the-box, cutting-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and VOIP. We understand that it is better to productize macro-magnetically than to revolutionize extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? Think granular. Think frictionless, extensible, real-time. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The 60/24/7/365 dynamic, plug-and-play obfuscation factor is front-end, long-term. Think intra-collaborative. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to disintermediate proactively than to reintermediate wirelessly. We will harness the term "enterprise". Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. Our wireless feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy convergence and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. We will augment our capability to optimize without decreasing our power to brand. If you transform wirelessly, you may have to implement robustly. If you expedite proactively, you may have to unleash dynamically. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! We realize that it is better to actualize super-virally than to engineer strategically. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? At Mountain Man, we think we know how to evolve extensibly. We will reintermediate the term "end-to-end, customer-defined". Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for coping with new user interfaces? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to reintermediate nano-perfectly leads to the power to visualize intuitively. Without schemas, you will lack macro-60/60/24/7/365 CAD. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP. What does it really mean to redefine "robustly"? We will reintermediate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365".