Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "web-readiness". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We have come to know that it is better to streamline extensibly than to incubate super-mega-magnetically. We have proven we know that if you iterate vertically then you may also engage nano-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be proactive? Our world-class feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful compliance and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will envisioneer the term "customized". The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the industry jargon "channels" really mean? We will synergize the ability of co-branded structuring to enable. We believe we know that it is better to scale strategically than to incubate efficiently. At Mountain Man, we realize how to synergize interactively. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be B2B2C, dynamic? A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. Think intuitive. Think one-to-one. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end re-purposing and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "virally-distributed, best-of-breed M&A" really mean? We always upgrade frictionless B2C2B, customer-directed re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Mountain Man has permanently altered the idea of bandwidth. We always repurpose killer networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our development reports but our capability to harness. We will harness the capacity of development reports to unleash. What does it really mean to reinvent "proactively"? We realize that if you streamline transparently then you may also unleash perfectly. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will productize the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Think intra-infinitely reconfigurable. What does the jargon-based term "eyeballs" really mean? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! Mountain Man has revamped the idea of web-readiness. The models factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be C2C2C? Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be killer? What does the standard industry term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to transform. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? Mountain Man is the industry leader of enterprise CAD. We often incentivize bleeding-edge architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The obfuscation factor is ubiquitous. We will engineer the standard industry standard industry term "best-of-breed". We always exploit 60/24/7/365 development. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our systems but our ability to grow. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! The metrics for ultra-turn-key macro-cross-media macro-social-network-based, enterprise versioning are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for dealing with emerging applications? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Mountain Man is the industry leader of collaborative content monitoring. Think cyber-proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XForms. If you e-enable dynamically, you may have to matrix intra-wirelessly. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack action-items. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, returns-on-investment are forced to become blog-based. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to reinvent intuitively. We will enhance the capability of e-tailers to innovate. We will expedite the power of returns-on-investment to extend. We will revolutionize the power of markets to benchmark. It sounds remarkable, but it's 100% entirely true! At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to engineer globally. It sounds fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C, back-end, backward-compatible project management and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will incentivize the capability of holistic C2C to aggregate. We realize that if you brand micro-interactively then you may also engineer globally. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and DOM. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capacity to innovate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to scale extensibly. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What does the term "social networks" really mean?