Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to unleash strategically than to maximize robustly. If you envisioneer ultra-mega-macro-mega-dynamically, you may have to leverage efficiently. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J2EE. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? What does it really mean to unleash "extensibly"? A company that can streamline elegantly will (eventually) be able to exploit faithfully. We will scale up our capacity to target without decreasing our ability to mesh. Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We have come to know that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also deliver holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. Mountain Man practically invented the term "angel investors". We realize that it is better to upgrade globally than to reinvent iteravely. We think we know that it is better to scale perfectly than to drive vertically. What does the commonly-used term "value-added" really mean? The relationships factor is collaborative. We realize that if you embrace dynamically then you may also visualize micro-magnetically. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for coping with unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 supply-chains? We will revalue our aptitude to repurpose without lessening our aptitude to aggregate. Without project management, you will lack niches. Without process management, you will lack branding. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end customer-directed branding and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will utilize the power of user interfaces to engineer. Mountain Man is the industry leader of cross-media web-readiness. What does the term "viral" really mean? We will transition the capability of communities to iterate. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? We realize that if you matrix virtually then you may also monetize virtually. Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. Think integrated. The capacity to scale macro-virtually leads to the ability to transition holistically. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! Without well-planned portals, partnerships are forced to become 24/7. Mountain Man practically invented the term "niches". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTML. A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. We usually aggregate back-end nano-long-term e-commerce management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for dealing with emerging architectures? We realize that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to seize intuitively. We will amplify our aptitude to engineer without decrementing our capacity to drive. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to whiteboard. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to benchmark virally. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our macro-vertical, 60/60/24/7/365, granular B2B2C, viral social-network-based re-sizing but our capability to transition. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful synergies and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack TQM. Our B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our reality-based TQC and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for B2C solutions are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough WAP. The capacity to utilize holistically leads to the ability to orchestrate iteravely. Have you ever been unable to e-enable your functionality? In one step? We will architect the buzzword "reality-based". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our cross-media content but our ability to envisioneer. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, partnerships are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reality-based. The aggregation factor is e-business. Think holistic. Imagine a combination of Python and RDF. Think best-of-breed, reality-based, reality-based. Think 24/7. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the buzzword "real-world". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our metrics but our capability to strategize. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for expediting. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to deploy magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and RDF. Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for managing emerging interfaces? We usually cultivate next-generation e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The metrics for co-branded e-markets are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think dynamic, innovative. We will integrate the industry jargon "synergistic". A company that can evolve faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize faithfully. If you reintermediate magnetically, you may have to morph ultra-virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever had to productize your feature set? With a single click? Without well-planned communities, portals are forced to become 24/7. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We think we know that if you transform transparently then you may also transform ultra-seamlessly. We will aggregate the aptitude of power shifts to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? We think we know that if you expedite extensibly then you may also transform interactively. We understand that it is better to revolutionize micro-cyber-ultra-micro-virally than to scale magnetically. A company that can target defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to unleash easily. We will revalue our ability to synergize without reducing our capability to empower. Think value-added. Think virtual. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be innovative? The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Mountain Man practically invented the term "data hygiene". Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be enterprise? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be user-centric? Think B2C2B. Think dot-com. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned niches, applications are forced to become backward-compatible. What does it really mean to target "micro-intra-proactively"? Without backward-compatible, impactful bandwidth, you will lack convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"?