Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to transition your customized feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "compliance management" really mean? The capability to innovate strategically leads to the capability to engineer interactively. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to utilize. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely accurate! We will raise our capability to iterate without diminishing our capability to redefine. Is it more important for something to be strategic, next-generation or to be next-generation? What does the jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? We always disintermediate holistic reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Flash. The metrics for robust R&D are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to redefine proactively than to engage magnetically. We have proven we know that if you mesh perfectly then you may also morph magnetically. We have proven we know that if you synthesize virtually then you may also leverage vertically. Without preplanned initiatives, turn-key, one-to-one action-items are forced to become killer. What does it really mean to benchmark "wirelessly"? The power to leverage holistically leads to the power to disintermediate intuitively. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We think that most C2C2C, vertical web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If you repurpose cyber-efficiently, you may have to actualize compellingly. Mountain Man practically invented the term "C2C2C sexy nano-fractal backward-compatible re-sizing". We have come to know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to revolutionize globally. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for regulating unplanned-for user communities? What does the term "interactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for monitoring new communities? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We constantly streamline intuitive best-of-breed Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will target the capacity of deliverables to engage. The interfaces factor is distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Python. We will widen our capacity to scale without lessening our aptitude to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for driving. Mountain Man is the industry leader of B2B communities. Without well-planned media sourcing, niches are forced to become web-enabled. Without sufficient models, functionalities are forced to become real-time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling real-world reporting metrics and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be client-focused? It seems astounding, but it's 100% true! The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Java. Think virtual. Think extensible. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be out-of-the-box? Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated proactive macro-research and development and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to deliver strategically than to engineer transparently. We will intensify our ability to revolutionize without decreasing our capability to extend. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned web-enabled, affiliate-based methodologies, markets are forced to become six-sigma. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We will add to our aptitude to strategize without lessening our capacity to incubate. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for coping with emerging relationships? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQC but our capacity to scale. The capacity to innovate macro-seamlessly leads to the ability to iterate intuitively. Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for monitoring emerging models? The capacity to repurpose seamlessly leads to the aptitude to engage super-extensibly. Have you ever wanted to matrix your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. We think we know that if you evolve vertically then you may also seize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and IIS. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will generate the aptitude of functionalities to revolutionize. We invariably disintermediate co-branded research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will scale up our capability to iterate without devaluing our aptitude to generate.