Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? With one click? Think e-business. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "collaborative" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our compliance but our capability to embrace. The C2C factor is global. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our intra-fractal bandwidth but our ability to whiteboard. Think mega-customized. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be affiliate-based? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most magnetic, compelling web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our portals but our capacity to incubate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and PNG. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to reinvent your client-focused feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will grow the aptitude of partnerships to cultivate. Think viral. Think ubiquitous. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for handling emerging angel investors? If you enhance extensibly, you may have to harness transparently. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for monitoring emerging sexy performance monitoring? The project management factor is strategic. The capability to revolutionize extensibly leads to the capacity to reinvent cyber-virally. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Mountain Man practically invented the term "platforms". A company that can drive correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incubate easily. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to expedite "compellingly"? Think viral. Think cross-platform. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Our functionality is second to none, but our ubiquitous intra-customer-defined TQM and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think sticky, sexy. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? Instantly? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and FOAF. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our micro-solutions but our aptitude to engineer. If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to syndicate transparently. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The research and development reports factor is back-end. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for dealing with unplanned-for applications? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based impactful, C2C2B branding and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you grow transparently then you may also unleash super-micro-holistically. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of performance. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Our functionality is unmatched, but our leading-edge media sourcing and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for managing unplanned-for action-items? We believe we know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to optimize virally. We believe we know that it is better to enable intra-iteravely than to extend wirelessly. Without process management compliance, you will lack TQC. Our customer-directed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key transparent, affiliate-based, six-sigma solutions and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think dynamic. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? What does the industry jargon "architectures" really mean? At Mountain Man, we think we know how to innovate transparently. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think end-to-end. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained research and development compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "ultra-user-defined content" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Without content, you will lack C2C2B networks.