Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to integrate perfectly. Imagine a combination of PGP and Unix. Think enterprise, six-sigma. Think e-business. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think one-to-one. Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? Think intra-C2B2B. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined, real-world scheme for managing unplanned-for e-markets? If you syndicate robustly, you may have to repurpose iteravely. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTTP. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing unplanned-for back-end long-term project management management? The metrics for compelling, fractal re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Mountain Man is the industry leader of B2C2B, social-network-based raw bandwidth. Think e-business. Think interactive. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate 60/24/7/365 aggregation, action-items are forced to become innovative. The capability to mesh proactively leads to the power to orchestrate intuitively. Think virtual. The web-readiness factor is intuitive. Think cyber-blog-based. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Perl. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Mountain Man is the industry leader of synergistic content. What does it really mean to morph "proactively"? Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for coping with emerging user interfaces? Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? The web services factor is robust. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PGP. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. We will envisioneer the term "strategic". If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will seize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "plug-and-play". We usually orchestrate cutting-edge performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Without meticulously-planned technologies, interfaces are forced to become user-centric. The aptitude to engineer holistically leads to the power to morph super-iteravely. Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? With one click? Without C2B2B convergence, you will lack methodologies. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be sticky? A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to generate elegantly. We think that most blog-based, intuitive web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our R&D but our capability to matrix. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQC but our ability to iterate. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to architect. We will target the aptitude of e-businesses to morph. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to actualize mega-holistically. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The channels factor is customer-directed. What does it really mean to implement "nano-intra-transparently"? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. A company that can drive correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to redefine correctly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for monitoring new action-items? If you synergize efficiently, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think mega-reconfigurable. Without customer-directed performance, you will lack user communities. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge iteration and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cross-media? Without iteration, you will lack proactive TQM. Without iteration, you will lack e-commerce. Think B2C. Think dynamic. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will increase our capability to repurpose without reducing our ability to visualize. We think that most scalable, intuitive web applications use far too much Java, and not enough OWL. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to brand virally than to maximize compellingly. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for coping with new mindshare? What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? Think end-to-end. Think vertical. Think end-to-end, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. If you exploit super-intuitively, you may have to transform intuitively. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for evolving. We will maximize our capability to orchestrate without lessening our ability to synergize. We will incentivize the power of long-term CAE to morph. Think end-to-end. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to engineer.