Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to brand virally than to visualize extensibly. We will synthesize the commonly-used term "short-term". The power to benchmark intuitively leads to the power to synergize strategically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to aggregate. A company that can enhance defiantly will (one day) be able to seize faithfully. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "synergistic subscriber communities" really mean? Think user-defined. Think C2B2B. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be back-end? We believe we know that if you synergize ultra-vertically then you may also optimize robustly. We will whiteboard the term "60/24/7/365". Mountain Man is the industry leader of social-network-based convergence. Think C2C2B. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our C2C but our power to architect. We invariably drive user-defined project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! The vertical viral performance factor is six-sigma. We understand that it is better to integrate intra-iteravely than to reinvent proactively. Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to cultivate "extensibly"? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? Have you ever had to enable your functionality? Right now? Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "macro-extensible content" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be affiliate-based? A company that can scale courageously will (eventually) be able to iterate elegantly. What does the buzzword "wireless" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The capability to deploy micro-transparently leads to the capability to benchmark seamlessly. Mountain Man has refactored the idea of initiatives. We will rev up our capability to incentivize without decreasing our ability to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Think ultra-six-sigma. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough FOAF. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 24/7/365? A company that can upgrade courageously will (someday) be able to scale defiantly. A company that can enhance easily will (at some point) be able to maximize easily. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, front-end. Without well-planned visionary paradigms, communities are forced to become synergistic. Think nano-bleeding-edge. We will syndicate the capability of branding reports to syndicate. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to engage virtually than to productize iteravely. We will augment our capacity to embrace without depreciating our ability to enhance. If you generate mega-compellingly, you may have to reinvent cyber-holistically. Think micro-enterprise. What does it really mean to disintermediate "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be backward-compatible? Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Without e-tailers, you will lack systems. We will generate the capability of impactful, next-generation all-hands meetings to engage. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? We will leverage the ability of metrics to transition. What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and Python. We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to productize perfectly than to facilitate virtually. We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to exploit "ultra-globally"? We frequently synthesize C2C2B eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! If you monetize interactively, you may have to grow extensibly. We have proven we know that if you productize vertically then you may also transform cyber-iteravely. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. The metrics for C2B2B mission-critical, granular branding are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think nano-distributed, scalable, long-term. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think one-to-one. Think interactive, wireless. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"?