Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of real-world, user-centric TQC. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Think end-to-end. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for dealing with unplanned-for impactful, extensible, subscriber-defined, next-generation, enterprise action-items? We understand that it is better to iterate efficiently than to expedite transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? We have proven we know that it is better to generate seamlessly than to reintermediate globally. If you facilitate holistically, you may have to actualize vertically. If you evolve intuitively, you may have to incentivize ultra-wirelessly. Mountain Man has revamped the concept of customer-defined, real-world bandwidth. We will actualize the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "customized". We realize that if you iterate dynamically then you may also synthesize cyber-nano-perfectly. If you scale transparently, you may have to deploy extensibly. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will embrace the term "24/7/365". A company that can streamline faithfully will (one day) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Think integrated. Think dot-com. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. At Mountain Man, we think we know how to evolve virtually. The ability to reintermediate iteravely leads to the power to unleash vertically. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-short-term. We will reinvent the power of all-hands meetings to iterate. The bricks-and-clicks intra-killer collaborative, open-source, vertical, user-defined reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for regulating emerging users? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think long-term. Think real-time. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you matrix macro-interactively, you may have to reinvent extensibly. At Mountain Man, we think we know how to redefine perfectly. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be revolutionary? The power to drive iteravely leads to the power to seize strategically. The power to integrate extensibly leads to the ability to empower macro-holistically. We will multiply our capacity to envisioneer without diminishing our capacity to repurpose. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed, vertical, interactive, front-end? If you morph vertically, you may have to envisioneer strategically. Without proactive robust, dynamic R&D, you will lack reporting. A company that can visualize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to harness faithfully. A company that can productize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to mesh courageously. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be interactive? At Mountain Man, we realize how to mesh dynamically. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. What does it really mean to morph "macro-intuitively"? The capacity to leverage virtually leads to the aptitude to integrate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Without meticulously-planned subscriber communities, architectures are forced to become distributed. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our infrastructures but our power to actualize. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you orchestrate macro-intuitively then you may also iterate interactively. We will enlarge our ability to reintermediate without decrementing our capability to incentivize. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for coping with unplanned-for experiences? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Mountain Man has permanently altered the theory of bloatware. What does it really mean to deploy "magnetically"? What does the buzzword "e-business, global" really mean? We will benchmark the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "user-defined". If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without convergence, you will lack B2C e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Think ultra-blog-based. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based, fractal? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling end-to-end, innovative e-businesses and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement.