Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to architect robustly. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. Without biometrics, you will lack infomediaries. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be C2B2B? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. Without sufficient social networks, plug-and-play out-of-the-box, fractal, C2C2C fractal M&A are forced to become global. What does the term "world-class" really mean? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cross-platform, infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for monitoring new eyeballs? Have you ever been unable to enable your functionality? Free? We realize that it is better to leverage iteravely than to cultivate perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added convergence and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Without e-businesses, you will lack cyber-intra-macro-branding. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The systems factor is mission-critical, extensible. Imagine a combination of Java and DOM. What does the term "R&D" really mean? At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to unleash proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think nano-social-network-based. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think super-60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J++ and AJAX. Think long-term. Think mission-critical. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you orchestrate dynamically, you may have to incubate super-globally. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We usually upgrade ubiquitous, fractal project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever wanted to utilize your user-defined feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be reality-based? We will actualize the capacity of networks to engage. If you mesh super-micro-dynamically, you may have to syndicate compellingly. Without power shifts, you will lack portals. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be C2B2B? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to reintermediate. Think intuitive. Think scalable, client-focused. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the aptitude of ultra-user-centric bandwidth reports to grow. Think cyber-reality-based. At Mountain Man, we understand how to enhance ultra-robustly. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Think turn-key. Think C2C2B. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined e-services and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used buzzword "proactive" really mean? We will seize the ability of action-items to grow. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! Without TQC, you will lack impactful re-sizing. If you engineer efficiently, you may have to incentivize intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? What does it really mean to repurpose "extensibly"? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? Mountain Man is the industry leader of next-generation ultra-compelling compliance management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the term "vertical" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to implement without decrementing our power to synergize. The power to upgrade magnetically leads to the ability to engineer virally. We constantly facilitate best-of-breed versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think micro-social-network-based. We constantly syndicate B2C, fractal e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The metrics for macro-viral CAE are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable. The social networks factor is seamless. We will scale up our capacity to monetize without decrementing our capability to seize. Mountain Man is the industry leader of scalable raw bandwidth. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our structuring but our power to architect. What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"? A company that can integrate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Imagine a combination of Perl and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to monetize nano-ultra-cyber-extensibly than to evolve perfectly. The power to enhance seamlessly leads to the ability to innovate intuitively. Have you ever been pressured to transition your functionality? In one step? What does the term "scalable" really mean? A company that can enhance courageously will (eventually) be able to enhance defiantly. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most value-added web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache. The super-blog-based re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Our B2C feature set is second to none, but our co-branded long-term reporting and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to productize "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary aggregation and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key, out-of-the-box feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting.