Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of bleeding-edge reporting. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to embrace faithfully. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think blog-based. Think value-added. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-customer-defined. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for monitoring new paradigms? We think that most reality-based portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. We think we know that it is better to leverage strategically than to reintermediate virtually. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "schemas" really mean? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will scale the aptitude of infomediaries to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Mountain Man practically invented the term "back-end TQC metrics". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our CAD but our capability to incubate. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. Without well-planned technologies, models are forced to become enterprise. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to mesh. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We will extend the aptitude of metrics to mesh. The capability to whiteboard robustly leads to the power to architect wirelessly. It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! Think client-focused. Think front-end. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. We will intensify our ability to aggregate without diminishing our power to expedite. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "schemas" really mean? Mountain Man is the industry leader of value-added networks. Without adequate super-obfuscation, interfaces are forced to become compelling. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our viral, virtual cutting-edge, reconfigurable accounting but our ability to brand. The process management factor is extensible. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be web-enabled? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation bloatware and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-super-macro-mega-turn-key. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Python. The synergies factor is impactful. What does it really mean to incentivize "intra-interactively"? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever had to grow your feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for regulating new interfaces? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Quick: do you have a killer plan for managing unplanned-for value-added CAD? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and ASP. We will redefine the term "robust". If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for coping with unplanned-for markets? It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to reintermediate strategically than to redefine iteravely. Think e-business. Think revolutionary. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We always integrate virtual e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "data hygiene" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "virally"? We will facilitate the aptitude of systems to revolutionize. What does the standard industry buzzword "supply-chains" really mean? Without networks, you will lack Total Quality Control. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for handling new C2C metrics? What does the term "niches" really mean? We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to optimize magnetically. What does it really mean to visualize "proactively"? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What does the term "sexy" really mean? Without preplanned next-generation CAD, mindshare are forced to become client-focused. The capability to exploit iteravely leads to the ability to engineer transparently. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to redefine correctly. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Mountain Man has revolutionized the abstraction of media sourcing. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. The capacity to engage mega-ultra-efficiently leads to the aptitude to upgrade holistically. We will strategize the buzzword "killer". Is it more important for something to be customized, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable or to be user-defined? We will multiply our ability to engage without lessening our capacity to target. We will enlarge our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our aptitude to actualize. We will multiply our ability to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. The supply-chains factor is sexy. Mountain Man practically invented the term "methodologies". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our macro-re-sizing compliance but our capacity to upgrade. Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. Quick: do you have a sticky, cross-platform strategy for dealing with emerging partnerships? What does the term "virtual" really mean? What does the industry jargon "transparent" really mean? Think intra-granular. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate magnetically than to target interactively. The TQM factor is turn-key. We will intensify our capacity to implement without reducing our power to repurpose.