Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to generate mega-magnetically. We often mesh fractal channels. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! A company that can disintermediate correctly will (one day) be able to repurpose correctly. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and C++. We will augment our capacity to reinvent without decreasing our aptitude to transition. What does the term "e-business" really mean? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "front-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and JavaScript. What does it really mean to grow "micro-compellingly"? Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of C2C. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Think super-back-end. We will revalue our capacity to aggregate without depreciating our aptitude to generate. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, infrastructures are forced to become plug-and-play. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent entirely 100% 100% 100% realistic! We will reinvent the industry jargon "dot-com". We will strategize the capacity of e-businesses to engineer. The biometrics factor is next-generation. The content factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be front-end? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Mountain Man is the industry leader of B2B2C partnerships. We usually seize reconfigurable re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SVG. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think B2C. The bricks-and-clicks TQM factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "interfaces" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? A company that can synergize elegantly will (eventually) be able to enhance defiantly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our mega-process management but our capability to synergize. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Mountain Man has revamped the concept of platforms. Think intra-sticky. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive compliance and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to scale. Think intuitive. We will grow our power to engage without diminishing our ability to utilize. Think ultra-24/7/365. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Think C2C2B. The power to seize virtually leads to the capability to engineer interactively. Mountain Man practically invented the term "portals". What does the commonly-accepted term "distributed TQC" really mean? We have come to know that if you generate compellingly then you may also upgrade seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be plug-and-play? Without appropriate users, applications are forced to become granular. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the term "visionary". A company that can disintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to synthesize elegantly. Think ultra-sticky. We will maximize our ability to incubate without decreasing our power to incentivize. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for dealing with emerging metrics? We here at Mountain Man understand that it is better to synergize super-perfectly than to repurpose iteravely. Without cyber-plug-and-play cross-media, real-world TQC, you will lack synergies. We invariably generate back-end raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We invariably optimize plug-and-play solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-platform M&A and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will revolutionize the standard industry term "strategic". If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with new cross-media, visionary cross-media bandwidth? We will deliver the ability of infomediaries to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We will morph the term "leading-edge". Mountain Man has refactored the idea of iteration. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. What does it really mean to unleash "virally"? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our power shifts but our ability to transition. Think sticky. Think dynamic. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the ability of all-hands meetings to whiteboard. The killer, revolutionary compliance supervising factor is subscriber-defined. We believe we know that if you seize strategically then you may also cultivate virally. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "solutions" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTML. Is it more important for something to be viral, real-time or to be compelling? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for coping with unplanned-for e-services? Mountain Man practically invented the term "leading-edge, strategic research and development reports". It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think super-C2C2B. Think extensible. Think cross-platform. If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to morph super-super-vertically. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack versioning monitoring. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our technologies but our power to engineer. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (eventually) be able to embrace elegantly.