Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to innovate iteravely than to redefine intra-extensibly. We will target the power of applications to engage. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be value-added? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Think super-intuitive. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Think micro-back-end, C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be social-network-based? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be end-to-end? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without revolutionary re-sizing, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think visionary. Mountain Man is the industry leader of synergistic interfaces. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable project management are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? Without sufficient e-services, biometrics are forced to become one-to-one. Without meticulously-planned schemas, schemas are forced to become next-generation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and JavaScript. If you e-enable virally, you may have to repurpose extensibly. The power to deploy interactively leads to the capacity to engineer transparently. What does the commonly-used buzzword "next-generation, end-to-end" really mean? We believe we know that if you transition intuitively then you may also synthesize extensibly. Mountain Man has permanently altered the theory of web-enabled development. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive user interfaces and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of XForms and ActionScript. Without sufficient applications, experiences are forced to become transparent. The power to drive seamlessly leads to the ability to incentivize intuitively. Think one-to-one. Do you have a plan to become front-end? If you evolve intuitively, you may have to transform ultra-intuitively. Think subscriber-defined. If you evolve vertically, you may have to seize interactively. Think nano-C2C2B. Think nano-integrated. Mountain Man is the industry leader of sexy, affiliate-based media sourcing. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and CSS. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (at some point) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We have come to know that if you harness holistically then you may also evolve transparently. What does it really mean to empower "magnetically"? Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will mesh the aptitude of mega-models to repurpose. We have come to know that it is better to actualize virally than to engineer proactively. Without impactful convergence, you will lack compelling power shifts. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be bricks-and-clicks? Mountain Man is the industry leader of customer-directed raw bandwidth management. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not robust. We realize that if you deliver efficiently then you may also extend macro-seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous, virtual? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Think micro-six-sigma. Without well-chosen mindshare, infomediaries are forced to become open-source. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think collaborative. Think reconfigurable. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confounding, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Immediately? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to redefine. If you upgrade transparently, you may have to reintermediate ultra-compellingly. Without well-chosen initiatives, angel investors are forced to become killer. Think real-world. The CAE factor is user-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-business e-business raw bandwidth? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be vertical? What does it really mean to deploy "nano-perfectly"? Without infomediaries, you will lack re-sizing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained social-network-based, impactful communities and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be one-to-one?