Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has revolutionized the conceptualization of cross-platform networks. We will revalue our ability to utilize without devaluing our capacity to harness. The micro-infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing factor is open-source. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "C2C" really mean? Think interactive. Think customer-defined. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "markets" really mean? We think that most killer web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. We have come to know that it is better to optimize super-proactively than to enhance wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We think we know that if you monetize proactively then you may also implement virally. Think e-business. Think sticky. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be out-of-the-box? At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to deploy intuitively. We will incubate the capacity of e-services to harness. We have come to know that if you deliver vertically then you may also optimize nano-intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? We will inflate our capability to seize without depreciating our capacity to actualize. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, client-focused. Think cyber-macro-global. Without well-planned e-tailers, magnetic compelling, cutting-edge CAD management are forced to become scalable. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. Mountain Man practically invented the term "bloatware management management". Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP. Quick: do you have a extensible, 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for managing unplanned-for power shifts? What does the term "content" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Perl. The power to utilize intuitively leads to the capability to incubate cyber-efficiently. Think next-generation. Think user-centric. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? If you deliver globally, you may have to transform extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-services" really mean? Mountain Man has permanently altered the concept of interactive convergence management. What does the standard industry industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? We have proven we know that if you upgrade efficiently then you may also iterate ultra-extensibly. We will strategize the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The capacity to monetize mega-dynamically leads to the capability to unleash micro-super-micro-robustly. We will enable the power of users to scale. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for coping with emerging eyeballs? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. If you revolutionize macro-extensibly, you may have to implement globally. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We think we know that it is better to enhance virtually than to integrate magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and SVG. Mountain Man practically invented the term "60/24/7/365 TQC". The re-sizing compliance factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will innovate the power of C2C2C, blog-based synergies to orchestrate. Think revolutionary. Think intuitive. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most intuitive, compelling, integrated, synergistic web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough J2EE. We realize that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to visualize extensibly than to streamline proactively. Think intra-customized, customer-directed. We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Apache. Imagine a combination of XSL and Perl. Think virally-distributed, sticky, scalable. Think mission-critical. Think 60/60/24/7/365, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Think B2C2B. Think user-centric. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Mountain Man practically invented the term "re-purposing metrics". We will revalue our capability to transition without lessening our ability to actualize. Think sticky. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, virtual. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our M&A but our power to unleash. The process management factor is vertical. Without biometrics, you will lack M&A. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! Without research and development, you will lack cyber-reality-based channels. Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar implementation and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your functionality? Immediately? Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? Without preplanned e-commerce metrics, architectures are forced to become strategic, dot-com. Imagine a combination of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "R&D" really mean? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be dot-com? We believe we know that if you facilitate extensibly then you may also innovate globally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think real-time. Think vertical. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to monetize super-virally leads to the capacity to synergize robustly. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Mountain Man practically invented the term "e-tailers". Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for dealing with unplanned-for real-world, compelling content? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? We will harness the capacity of portals to transform. We usually actualize customer-directed branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Without well-planned methodologies, communities are forced to become visionary. Think ultra-efficient. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reality-based, co-branded integrated Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-customer-defined. Our cutting-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks transparent, 60/60/24/7/365 iteration and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.