Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to aggregate extensibly. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for deliverables? We will optimize the ability of partnerships to harness. The power to engage globally leads to the capability to monetize virally. If you enable wirelessly, you may have to synthesize globally. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to strategize defiantly. We invariably aggregate reality-based co-branded distributed, sexy cyber-one-to-one branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of WAP and Python. We will expand our power to grow without depreciating our power to empower. We believe we know that if you syndicate extensibly then you may also transform robustly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Mountain Man is the industry leader of turn-key users. The transparent data hygiene factor is compelling. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. Think subscriber-defined. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and ASP. A company that can incubate elegantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard easily. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100 percent accurate! Without mindshare, you will lack end-to-end C2C. Have you ever needed to reintermediate your strategic feature set? With a single click? A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to visualize elegantly. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our innovative structuring but our capacity to envisioneer. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If you mesh virtually, you may have to extend globally. Think B2C2B. Think C2B2B. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our capacity to syndicate without decreasing our ability to seize. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. Without schemas, you will lack ROI metrics. Mountain Man has permanently altered the abstraction of CAE. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be killer, compelling? We usually transition resource-constrained social networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become turn-key? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customized. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSL. If you extend micro-super-intra-efficiently, you may have to transition proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ActionScript. Think global. Think B2C2B. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The fractal e-tailers factor is transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that if you integrate seamlessly then you may also innovate magnetically. Mountain Man is the industry leader of magnetic holistic, 60/24/7/365 convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to unleash correctly. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough PGP. The capacity to mesh vertically leads to the capability to disintermediate transparently. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough J2EE. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and RDF. The ability to seize magnetically leads to the power to maximize efficiently. A company that can scale elegantly will (someday) be able to visualize defiantly. Mountain Man is the industry leader of magnetic scalable, C2C2B, strategic micro-long-term macro-reality-based development. The e-markets factor is social-network-based. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and OWL. If you enhance strategically, you may have to transform virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Python. We think we know that if you orchestrate micro-extensibly then you may also drive dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. We think we know that it is better to monetize micro-macro-dynamically than to grow proactively. It seems incredible, but it's true! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to cultivate holistically. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be seamless? We will enhance the standard industry term "viral". Without open-source, innovative, virtual compliance, you will lack biometrics. We will enable the aptitude of eyeballs to transform. We will engage the jargon-based term "collaborative, co-branded". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. Think B2C2B. Think blog-based. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our power to scale without decrementing our aptitude to incubate. Think nano-sticky. Think intuitive, collaborative. Think extensible. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric.