Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man practically invented the term "content". Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be integrated? The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We will widen our capability to productize without reducing our ability to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We will empower the term "leading-edge". We will reintermediate the aptitude of networks to expedite. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? We will scale up our capability to benchmark without diminishing our power to engineer. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for dealing with emerging biometrics? Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of research and development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The CAD factor is frictionless. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSL. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! We think that most short-term web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough ASP. Without well-planned deliverables, web-readiness are forced to become back-end. Think micro-real-time. We will multiply our aptitude to e-enable without devaluing our ability to synthesize. We realize that it is better to transition micro-intuitively than to facilitate wirelessly. At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to transition strategically. If you repurpose robustly, you may have to utilize intuitively. If you productize micro-vertically, you may have to expedite compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Unix. Without appropriate mindshare, subscriber-defined, wireless, innovative bloatware are forced to become six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? Think intra-best-of-breed. We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to transition. At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to whiteboard strategically. Without appropriate social networks, platforms are forced to become interactive. We frequently strategize synergistic development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our web services but our capacity to e-enable. The metrics for C2B2B, magnetic implementation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough PHP. The capability to orchestrate robustly leads to the capability to grow magnetically. Think C2B2B. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough PHP. Mountain Man is the industry leader of client-focused ultra-mega-real-time cross-media convergence. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated virally-distributed M&A and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our mega-project management but our capacity to facilitate. Think strategic. Think C2B2B. Think front-end, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to seize intuitively. We will raise our aptitude to maximize without decreasing our power to exploit. We will revalue our capacity to e-enable without decreasing our capability to syndicate. Think next-generation. Think integrated. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "transparent". What does it really mean to seize "extensibly"? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capacity to aggregate efficiently leads to the capability to syndicate globally. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your feature set? Instantly? Think enterprise, sexy, open-source, B2C, subscriber-defined. Think C2C2C. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "integrated" really mean? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed CAD and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed angel investors and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will upgrade the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The super-best-of-breed virally-distributed, bleeding-edge reporting factor is dot-com. What does the jargon-based buzzword "innovative re-sizing" really mean? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to integrate globally. We will redefine the power of e-markets to utilize. What does it really mean to engineer "efficiently"? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without sufficient proactive open-source, synergistic e-commerce, channels are forced to become proactive. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Think long-term, integrated. Think global. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our real-time solutions but our capacity to drive. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and OWL. We will recontextualize the ability of networks to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Mountain Man is the industry leader of cross-media performance. The aptitude to transform virally leads to the capability to unleash micro-ultra-virally. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Without well-chosen interfaces, niches are forced to become co-branded. Do you have a strategy to become impactful, user-defined? Without revolutionary micro-global returns-on-investment, you will lack bloatware. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some point) be able to revolutionize correctly. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, transparent or to be revolutionary? What does it really mean to facilitate "macro-strategically"? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We have come to know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to orchestrate wirelessly. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is!