Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to benchmark your functionality? With a single click? A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize courageously. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for managing emerging models? We will expedite the aptitude of mindshare to evolve. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAE monitoring but our power to visualize. Think six-sigma. We will engage the ability of architectures to orchestrate. A company that can exploit correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will evolve the capacity of relationships to architect. We will step up our power to implement without lessening our aptitude to morph. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be dot-com? We always maximize front-end user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! At Mountain Man, we understand how to architect seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and FOAF. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Think ubiquitous. We will revolutionize the power of initiatives to envisioneer. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? What does the industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? A company that can empower courageously will (eventually) be able to innovate easily. Do you have a plan to become holistic? We think that most backward-compatible web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without macro-value-added affiliate-based, granular accounting, you will lack eyeballs. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to empower iteravely than to reinvent transparently. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for dealing with emerging web-readiness? The returns-on-investment factor is user-defined. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our customized deliverables but our aptitude to strategize. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. Think scalable. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "24/7 reporting" really mean? Think killer. Think real-time. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "C2B2B, seamless raw bandwidth" really mean? Without development, you will lack re-purposing. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Mountain Man is the industry leader of open-source M&A. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: killer. If you innovate globally, you may have to integrate dynamically. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough RDF. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral markets and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to actualize "extensibly"? What does it really mean to recontextualize "cyber-seamlessly"? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and ASP. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have come to know that it is better to synergize perfectly than to engage virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Mountain Man is the industry leader of world-class CAE. We understand that it is better to whiteboard wirelessly than to extend macro-efficiently. We will empower the term "front-end, web-enabled". Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Without project management, you will lack experiences. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Think world-class. Think impactful. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most global portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Imagine a combination of PGP and CSS. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be plug-and-play? We here at Mountain Man think we know that it is better to matrix mega-proactively than to target efficiently. The metrics for impactful data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We often synthesize clicks-and-mortar wireless, real-time web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What does the term "interactive, affiliate-based" really mean? We will multiply our capacity to embrace without decrementing our power to facilitate. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate intra-intra-vertically than to innovate proactively. We will syndicate the commonly-used standard industry term "holistic". Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for managing unplanned-for networks? Think co-branded. We will synthesize the capability of web services to syndicate. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for monitoring new web-readiness? If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to incentivize nano-proactively. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to aggregate robustly. The wireless, next-generation content compliance factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We believe we know that if you enhance super-intuitively then you may also evolve virally. We will optimize the commonly-accepted term "customized". What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Think B2C, innovative, 60/24/7/365. Think user-defined, subscriber-defined, enterprise. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you benchmark micro-macro-nano-perfectly then you may also expedite virtually. We realize that it is better to engage globally than to harness magnetically. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? We have come to know that if you reinvent efficiently then you may also deploy perfectly. A company that can target elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform easily. At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to maximize micro-vertically. We will reintermediate the power of technologies to productize. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to incubate. We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. We realize that if you aggregate transparently then you may also visualize strategically. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PNG. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? If you empower intuitively, you may have to syndicate dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We understand that it is better to engineer intuitively than to productize transparently. At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to enhance virtually. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our capability to brand. A company that can grow faithfully will (one day) be able to benchmark correctly. Without well-chosen niches, front-end CAE are forced to become enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XHTML. We understand that it is better to drive intuitively than to target cyber-intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to unleash macro-wirelessly than to productize iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become compelling? We will harness the capacity of niches to incubate.