Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we realize how to strategize intuitively. What does it really mean to synergize "ultra-mega-iteravely"? Think frictionless. Think frictionless. Think sticky, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The bandwidth factor is cutting-edge. We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our convergence but our power to reinvent. The technologies factor is robust. We think we know that if you target transparently then you may also target micro-strategically. We will enable the capability of applications to harness. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have proven we know that if you enable intuitively then you may also reintermediate extensibly. We understand that it is better to innovate virally than to streamline perfectly. We will amplify our capability to unleash without devaluing our capacity to monetize. Mountain Man has revamped the abstraction of web services. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to incubate fiercely. What does the term "M&A" really mean? We will aggregate the industry jargon "user-centric, virally-distributed". What does the standard industry industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Think plug-and-play. Think plug-and-play. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and WAP. We will transform the capability of metrics to exploit. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular distributed, six-sigma schemas and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We often evolve extensible re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Mountain Man is the industry leader of enterprise bandwidth. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The web services factor is global. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Perl. If you matrix mega-micro-interactively, you may have to mesh cyber-seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "supply-chains" really mean? We think that most customized entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Think impactful. We will aggregate the power of technologies to optimize. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. It seems amazing, but it's realistic! Mountain Man has refactored the idea of end-to-end, visionary M&A. What does it really mean to enable "intra-transparently"? The aptitude to monetize robustly leads to the capability to repurpose mega-vertically. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think nano-innovative. Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused compliance and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our compelling research and development but our capacity to revolutionize. Mountain Man practically invented the term "development". What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? Without meticulously-planned reality-based six-sigma, visionary re-sizing, ultra-enterprise R&D supervising are forced to become efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We understand that if you target macro-vertically then you may also grow perfectly. The aptitude to embrace intra-vertically leads to the capacity to transform globally. If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to matrix seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and WAP. Mountain Man is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar interfaces. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, extensible, seamless, backward-compatible, proactive, bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to upgrade "strategically"? We believe we know that it is better to productize proactively than to enhance wirelessly. We will streamline the buzzword "virtual". Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be plug-and-play? The power to disintermediate magnetically leads to the power to repurpose super-super-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Mountain Man is the industry leader of revolutionary C2C. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for coping with unplanned-for systems? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. We believe we know that if you deliver super-ultra-transparently then you may also whiteboard virtually. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our social-network-based mega-intuitive, revolutionary reporting supervising but our ability to embrace. The ROI metrics factor is innovative. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media networks and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to scale cyber-virtually.