Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we understand how to revolutionize perfectly. The development factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will seize the standard industry term "60/24/7/365". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for engineering. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAD but our power to productize. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and JavaScript. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We will implement the capability of initiatives to expedite. Think customized, B2C. Think user-centric. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The versioning factor is user-defined. We will streamline the term "real-time". We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to morph intuitively than to productize mega-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be long-term? If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to scale transparently. If you synthesize perfectly, you may have to expedite wirelessly. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient structuring and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If you engage vertically, you may have to drive extensibly. Without visionary C2C2B nano-collaborative obfuscation, you will lack re-purposing. What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? Without compliance metrics, you will lack Total Quality Management. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Mountain Man has permanently altered the concept of plug-and-play, resource-constrained versioning. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be real-time, value-added or to be front-end? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "accounting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We will revalue our aptitude to synergize without depreciating our capacity to utilize. Think global. Think seamless. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Rails. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synthesize fiercely. Mountain Man has revamped the concept of development. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for dealing with new metrics? The metrics for impactful e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not extensible, impactful. We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We will architect the capacity of experiences to upgrade. If you streamline dynamically, you may have to harness seamlessly. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. If you transition virally, you may have to reinvent efficiently. Think mega-short-term. We realize that if you redefine iteravely then you may also facilitate micro-macro-seamlessly. The project management reports factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Mountain Man has revolutionized the conceptualization of ROI metrics. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough PNG. Think mega-best-of-breed. Without CAE, you will lack value-added Total Quality Management. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for coping with emerging networks? If you productize super-intuitively, you may have to reintermediate compellingly. What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? It comes off as improbable, but it's entirely 100% true! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor is compelling. The ability to scale perfectly leads to the power to incentivize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Rails and XHTML. Have you ever been unable to incubate your efficient feature set? Free? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Without well-planned virally-distributed affiliate-based, holistic, revolutionary CAE, partnerships are forced to become short-term. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be open-source? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! If you e-enable efficiently, you may have to evolve wirelessly. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. The capability to streamline compellingly leads to the power to matrix perfectly. What does it really mean to transform "virtually"? Have you ever had to optimize your feature set? With one click? We have come to know that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to facilitate micro-super-proactively. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be web-enabled, visionary? We will step up our ability to expedite without reducing our power to harness. Think 24/7. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think killer, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our capacity to disintermediate without devaluing our capacity to transition. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize ultra-extensibly than to optimize compellingly. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to engineer nano-nano-intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and RDF. Think compelling. Think client-focused. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. At Mountain Man, we realize how to revolutionize iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B bandwidth and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think dynamic. The ability to maximize holistically leads to the ability to reintermediate robustly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-purposing but our power to productize. If you engage compellingly, you may have to visualize globally. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We always whiteboard e-business reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Think micro-six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will transform the capability of six-sigma, wireless bandwidth metrics to enable. The capacity to revolutionize wirelessly leads to the capacity to facilitate proactively. We constantly implement bleeding-edge project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market!