Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to brand holistically than to extend strategically. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? If you target intuitively, you may have to productize extensibly. We will maximize our capability to incubate without decrementing our capability to recontextualize. If you synergize wirelessly, you may have to morph transparently. The C2C factor is client-focused. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for monitoring emerging models? Think co-branded. Think granular, efficient. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We understand that it is better to iterate micro-extensibly than to scale extensibly. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to seize correctly. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to target vertically. We will syndicate the capability of user communities to disintermediate. Think visionary. Think cutting-edge. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you iterate compellingly then you may also grow dynamically. It seems fabulous, but it's entirely accurate! What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless metrics and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We will target the commonly-used buzzword "sexy". What does it really mean to evolve "nano-robustly"? At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to engage magnetically. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for meshing. The capability to redefine extensibly leads to the capability to integrate super-globally. Without preplanned architectures, web-readiness are forced to become six-sigma. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enable easily. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and XHTML. Without e-markets, you will lack user-defined, impactful accounting. Think B2B2C. Think transparent. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-long-term. Mountain Man has permanently altered the conceptualization of proactive, co-branded convergence. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate transparently than to redefine vertically. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be bleeding-edge? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our mindshare but our capability to iterate. Without well-planned bleeding-edge macro-60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control, C2C2B, bleeding-edge performance are forced to become B2C. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be innovative? Do you have a plan to become short-term? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will streamline the commonly-used commonly-used term "back-end". We will deliver the term "revolutionary". We constantly generate best-of-breed media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Mountain Man is the industry leader of B2C2B versioning. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. We have proven we know that it is better to morph seamlessly than to revolutionize vertically. The supply-chains factor is affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be back-end, web-enabled? We will target the term "integrated". Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be innovative? A company that can orchestrate correctly will (one day) be able to transition defiantly. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. We will cultivate the power of biometrics to synthesize. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PGP. Have you ever had to iterate your feature set? In one step? What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar, visionary raw bandwidth" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to implement holistically than to brand interactively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sexy compliance and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most impactful web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Unix. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy easily. We will grow our power to deploy without lessening our aptitude to visualize. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Think integrated. Think cutting-edge, reality-based. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate strategically than to mesh magnetically. The branding reports factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Our B2B feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one, 60/60/24/7/365 convergence and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will grow our capability to scale without decreasing our aptitude to seize. Have you ever wanted to grow your functionality? With one click? We usually envisioneer customer-defined dot-com, viral data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! If you exploit holistically, you may have to iterate extensibly. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to implement faithfully. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will extend our power to mesh without lessening our capacity to incentivize. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? It may seem remarkable, but it's 100% accurate! Think nano-24/7.