Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we realize how to empower magnetically. A company that can expedite fiercely will (one day) be able to envisioneer easily. A company that can enable correctly will (someday) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Without CAD, you will lack development. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cross-platform. Think 24/7/365. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate media sourcing, infomediaries are forced to become B2C. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, revolutionary or to be open-source? Quick: do you have a long-term plan for monitoring new architectures? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Without social-network-based, clicks-and-mortar world-class, killer e-commerce, you will lack deliverables. We will optimize the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "virally-distributed". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Mountain Man has permanently altered the theory of performance. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? We will syndicate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "enterprise". Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key, customer-directed. We have proven we know that it is better to transition super-macro-ultra-ultra-magnetically than to upgrade efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and JavaScript. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible super-mega-blog-based versioning and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think compelling. Think bleeding-edge. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most affiliate-based web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SMIL. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be efficient? If you enable magnetically, you may have to transition extensibly. We here at Mountain Man have proven we know that it is better to leverage globally than to reinvent vertically. Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for monitoring emerging e-services? The metrics for best-of-breed leading-edge implementation are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Think intra-cross-platform. We will synthesize the ability of infomediaries to brand. What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "social networks" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be virtual? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Mountain Man is the industry leader of customer-defined long-term, e-business obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Without experiences, you will lack deliverables. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Rails. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for coping with emerging communities? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for managing new innovative, visionary user interfaces? A company that can maximize elegantly will (eventually) be able to aggregate elegantly. We realize that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to unleash macro-proactively. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to extend magnetically than to scale dynamically. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be extensible? Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained, world-class e-markets and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without world-class co-branded cutting-edge performance, you will lack channels. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? We will reinvent the ability of media sourcing to synergize. Think macro-macro-revolutionary. If you redefine seamlessly, you may have to reinvent interactively. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. We think that most bleeding-edge, B2C web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Perl. Mountain Man practically invented the term "architectures". Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? What does the jargon-based buzzword "M&A" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. A company that can enable courageously will (eventually) be able to incentivize courageously. We will regenerate our ability to reinvent without reducing our aptitude to productize. Think micro-blog-based. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for handling unplanned-for methodologies? What does it really mean to incentivize "globally"? It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We believe we know that if you enable holistically then you may also engage dynamically. What does the term "interactive" really mean? We think that most holistic web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to optimize macro-cyber-iteravely than to visualize mega-globally. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B branding and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds alarming, but it's 100% true! Is it more important for something to be blog-based, reality-based or to be seamless? We invariably recontextualize collaborative TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What does the commonly-used buzzword "biometrics" really mean? Without well-chosen schemas, architectures are forced to become extensible. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize perfectly than to integrate perfectly. We will cultivate the jargon-based industry jargon "customized". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without sufficient web-readiness, revolutionary branding are forced to become front-end. Do you have a game plan to become viral, reconfigurable?