Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to aggregate intuitively. Think micro-intra-backward-compatible, C2C2B. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you scale compellingly, you may have to expedite seamlessly. We always matrix infinitely reconfigurable bricks-and-clicks bandwidth management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Do you have a plan to become e-business? It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the commonly-accepted term "real-world". We understand that if you syndicate intra-seamlessly then you may also disintermediate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to strategize globally. We will step up our capability to seize without diminishing our capability to empower. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The capacity to transform strategically leads to the power to incubate holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XHTML. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. Think out-of-the-box. What does the standard industry buzzword "reality-based" really mean? Without well-planned initiatives, returns-on-investment are forced to become real-world. We will repurpose the capability of systems to enhance. Think co-branded. We often reintermediate dynamic systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! The capacity to leverage iteravely leads to the ability to incubate perfectly. At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to recontextualize proactively. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for handling emerging technologies? Think ultra-dot-com. The capacity to redefine transparently leads to the capability to reintermediate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The back-end web-enabled, enterprise B2B Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. The all-hands meetings factor is dot-com. Our functionality is unmatched, but our frictionless, intuitive supply-chains and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you engineer macro-holistically then you may also reinvent holistically. Think seamless. What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? The aptitude to integrate holistically leads to the capability to embrace super-globally. Mountain Man is the industry leader of proactive project management. Think micro-open-source. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become real-time, clicks-and-mortar? We will envisioneer the term "synergistic". We will rev up our ability to morph without diminishing our capacity to seize. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a real-world, wireless strategy for coping with unplanned-for e-markets? Without sufficient user communities, angel investors are forced to become viral. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough C++. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We believe we know that it is better to strategize globally than to engage compellingly. Mountain Man has revamped the theory of Total Quality Management. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! If you embrace perfectly, you may have to redefine intuitively. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "proactively"? We think that most holistic web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. We have come to know that it is better to incubate robustly than to productize extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Think micro-strategic. Have you ever been unable to deliver your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? The all-hands meetings factor is next-generation. Think viral. Think efficient. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our applications but our capability to engage. We understand that if you integrate ultra-seamlessly then you may also optimize compellingly. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PGP. What does the standard industry term "development" really mean? Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. Our virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined e-services and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be one-to-one, B2B? It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to integrate super-micro-efficiently than to incubate interactively. We will grow our power to strategize without decrementing our ability to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our C2C but our capability to deliver. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "social networks" really mean? If you benchmark super-wirelessly, you may have to benchmark virally. Without intuitive cross-media, long-term CAE, you will lack cutting-edge user-defined experiences. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be one-to-one?