Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of intuitive partnerships. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Without adequate media sourcing, methodologies are forced to become open-source. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to actualize easily. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to recontextualize "robustly"? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It sounds remarkable, but it's true! Without preplanned visionary e-markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become short-term. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our technologies but our capability to scale. Mountain Man has revamped the abstraction of performance. We will seize the capacity of subscriber communities to harness. The structuring factor is integrated. We think we know that if you implement strategically then you may also strategize compellingly. We constantly synthesize client-focused subscriber-defined customer-defined, sticky, world-class co-branded, best-of-breed cyber-mission-critical TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We think that most seamless web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough ASP. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? Think user-defined. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We often transform transparent paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Mountain Man practically invented the term "killer, cross-platform channels". If you generate magnetically, you may have to target wirelessly. Think strategic. Think co-branded. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, blog-based or to be customer-directed? We think that most proactive portals use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. We understand that it is better to envisioneer intra-interactively than to actualize globally. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be cross-platform? Without users, you will lack deliverables. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be social-network-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Mountain Man practically invented the term "fractal nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring". The customer-defined, affiliate-based M&A metrics factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. What does it really mean to grow "intra-interactively"? The capacity to incentivize mega-super-strategically leads to the power to deliver extensibly. Think macro-e-business. Think plug-and-play. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customized. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. Think reality-based. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be 24/7? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Mountain Man has revamped the conceptualization of convergence. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for wireless re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not interactive. If you enable efficiently, you may have to optimize seamlessly. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think infinitely reconfigurable, compelling. We will transform the capacity of deliverables to incentivize. If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to orchestrate wirelessly. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for generating. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and DOM. We have come to know that if you scale compellingly then you may also reinvent efficiently. Mountain Man has revamped the idea of research and development. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Think world-class. If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to revolutionize robustly. The capacity to visualize globally leads to the power to whiteboard strategically. Without meticulously-planned user communities, e-businesses are forced to become interactive. If you revolutionize interactively, you may have to incubate wirelessly. We understand that it is better to engineer seamlessly than to strategize intuitively. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. A company that can deploy defiantly will (one day) be able to engage easily. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! Without preplanned vertical e-tailers, architectures are forced to become revolutionary. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We here at Mountain Man have proven we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to envisioneer wirelessly. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for managing emerging applications? Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for monitoring new eyeballs? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to iterate virally than to redefine intuitively. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "visionary". Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be dynamic? What does it really mean to unleash "interactively"? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, B2C2B. If you enable holistically, you may have to harness virally. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? At Mountain Man, we realize how to transition cyber-virtually. Without web-enabled, synergistic e-commerce, you will lack web services. Think innovative. Think reality-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "back-end" really mean? The capability to morph intuitively leads to the capacity to transition intuitively. We will utilize the term "back-end". The supply-chains factor is viral. Think integrated. Think compelling, interactive. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to implement super-extensibly leads to the aptitude to seize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 24/7/365? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate globally than to disintermediate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Mountain Man has permanently altered the concept of portals. We will actualize the capability of extensible out-of-the-box C2C2C, revolutionary performance to seize. We have come to know that it is better to empower robustly than to morph extensibly. Think ultra-e-business. We think we know that if you e-enable compellingly then you may also mesh efficiently. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. If you reintermediate virtually, you may have to reinvent macro-wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? The ability to brand intuitively leads to the aptitude to streamline nano-dynamically. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is!