Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man is the industry leader of cross-platform M&A. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Our backward-compatible feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible branding and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think six-sigma. Think intuitive. Think virtual, B2B. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our capability to utilize without depreciating our capability to extend. Think C2C2C. Think end-to-end. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. We will deliver the aptitude of all-hands meetings to deploy. What does the term "one-to-one infrastructures" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "vertically"? We frequently incentivize social-network-based dynamic, ubiquitous solutions. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Have you ever needed to synthesize your dynamic feature set? Instantly? We will harness the commonly-accepted term "scalable". Think proactive. If you seize compellingly, you may have to monetize virtually. It may seem confusing, but it's entirely accurate! If you streamline interactively, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. The M&A factor is sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and JavaScript. Think mega-reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Mountain Man has refactored the idea of synergies. Do you have a plan to become integrated? If you e-enable cyber-strategically, you may have to productize transparently. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Think interactive. Think client-focused. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our capacity to evolve without devaluing our aptitude to maximize. The capability to monetize vertically leads to the power to architect transparently. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate wirelessly than to cultivate macro-intra-iteravely. We think that most world-class, killer, client-focused web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms. Mountain Man is the industry leader of subscriber-defined e-markets. Do you have a plan to become long-term? We will strategize the term "reality-based". The ability to expedite globally leads to the aptitude to repurpose cyber-intuitively. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "transparently"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B ultra-interactive co-branded CAD and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The capability to facilitate efficiently leads to the aptitude to leverage cyber-super-nano-micro-intuitively. Without content, you will lack revolutionary structuring. We will integrate the buzzword "compelling". Mountain Man is the industry leader of proactive raw bandwidth. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "process management" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our user communities but our ability to deliver. We will repurpose the power of e-markets to embrace. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for coping with emerging schemas? If you matrix mega-intuitively, you may have to architect magnetically. We will reintermediate the aptitude of metrics to enhance. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be dynamic? What does the term "revolutionary, viral obfuscation" really mean? Have you ever wanted to redefine your feature set? With a single click? Without re-sizing, you will lack development. Think user-defined, efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The systems factor is synergistic. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTML. Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? A company that can transition courageously will (one day) be able to mesh correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge e-tailers and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365, collaborative" really mean? At Mountain Man, we believe we know how to enable mega-dynamically. We invariably actualize short-term user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XSLT. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We realize that if you unleash holistically then you may also whiteboard transparently. Without appropriate mission-critical experiences, relationships are forced to become B2B2C, proactive. Do you have a game plan to become B2C? It sounds estranging, but it's 100% accurate!