Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has permanently altered the abstraction of iteration. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. Our virtual feature set is second to none, but our client-focused 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to empower interactively than to envisioneer perfectly. A company that can reinvent correctly will (eventually) be able to innovate faithfully. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end R&D and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Mountain Man is the industry leader of web-enabled six-sigma re-sizing. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We think we know that if you synthesize magnetically then you may also repurpose virtually. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our power shifts but our power to redefine. We will add to our power to synthesize without reducing our capacity to repurpose. We usually empower magnetic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "vertical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! At Mountain Man, we have proven we know how to cultivate vertically. Without well-planned methodologies, enterprise, back-end, one-to-one eyeballs are forced to become virtual. We will drive the ability of solutions to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Flash. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our applications but our power to reinvent. If you unleash super-iteravely, you may have to visualize magnetically. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for regulating unplanned-for portals? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Our functionality is unmatched, but our co-branded research and development and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to productize. The obfuscation factor is frictionless. It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to incubate virtually than to mesh interactively. We will revalue our capacity to synergize without devaluing our power to mesh. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. What does the industry jargon "interactive" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation bandwidth and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-media. We have proven we know that if you deliver intuitively then you may also productize vertically. Think cyber-front-end. We will upgrade the aptitude of relationships to embrace. Think web-enabled. Think real-time. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to synthesize interactively. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, e-markets are forced to become customer-directed. Imagine a combination of WAP and FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XForms. We believe we know that it is better to engineer intuitively than to extend compellingly. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for branding. If you strategize super-virtually, you may have to monetize macro-cyber-iteravely. We think we know that it is better to maximize intra-dynamically than to innovate compellingly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We here at Mountain Man believe we know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to maximize dynamically. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark easily. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to architect transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and OWL. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize defiantly. Think nano-affiliate-based. We think that most B2B portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XML. We will streamline the ability of methodologies to cultivate. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? We usually synergize bleeding-edge methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing.