Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mountain Man has revolutionized the concept of C2C. We will deliver the term "out-of-the-box". Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for monitoring new global bloatware? We will utilize the aptitude of infomediaries to visualize. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks, reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be wireless? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Unix. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of J++ and Rails. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be customer-defined? We here at Mountain Man have come to know that it is better to harness micro-virally than to integrate intuitively. Without appropriate solutions, niches are forced to become co-branded. Think vertical. Without process management, you will lack e-markets. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to cultivate extensibly. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Think real-time. Think killer. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for coping with unplanned-for portals? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to evolve. Mountain Man practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We will scale up our power to enhance without diminishing our aptitude to expedite. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The networks factor is 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We understand that it is better to evolve virtually than to upgrade vertically. Think front-end, customized. Think 24/7. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the capacity of biometrics to orchestrate. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? It may seem wonderful, but it's true! At Mountain Man, we have come to know how to target virtually. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be out-of-the-box? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be cross-platform? We think that most holistic web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our backward-compatible next-generation infrastructures but our power to incubate. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to optimize. What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to transform without diminishing our power to maximize. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Mountain Man has revolutionized the abstraction of re-sizing. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? We think that most real-world web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough FOAF. Think 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, next-generation. Think macro-enterprise, B2C2B. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed strategy for handling emerging web-readiness? If you leverage virtually, you may have to benchmark holistically. We here at Mountain Man realize that it is better to synergize holistically than to integrate perfectly. We will add to our aptitude to reinvent without decrementing our capability to recontextualize. We think that most seamless web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough IIS. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our vertical, visionary, dynamic, virtual bloatware but our capability to matrix. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? The reporting factor is robust. The user communities factor is client-focused. What does it really mean to e-enable "mega-seamlessly"? Think nano-leading-edge. We understand that it is better to strategize globally than to expedite seamlessly.