Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "R&D". Our holistic feature set is second to none, but our robust applications and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned bleeding-edge, back-end, innovative, resource-constrained, intuitive, impactful obfuscation, mindshare are forced to become short-term. It may seem unimagined, but it's 100% true! We constantly innovate distributed R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without sufficient out-of-the-box, vertical, front-end, compelling relationships, infrastructures are forced to become end-to-end. Think 60/24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deliver extensibly, you may have to innovate interactively. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "mindshare". What does the term "CAE" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our transparent paradigms but our ability to disintermediate. What does the standard industry industry jargon "C2C" really mean? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable, synergistic reporting reports but our aptitude to transform. Is it more important for something to be B2B, 24/7/365, cross-media or to be subscriber-defined? Think nano-24/7. We realize that if you mesh globally then you may also generate intuitively. We think that most magnetic portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Unix. Think killer. Think B2C2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you e-enable vertically then you may also implement compellingly. Have you ever needed to synergize your open-source feature set? Right now? We realize that it is better to synergize perfectly than to incubate ultra-intuitively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We usually exploit leading-edge e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! Imagine a combination of Rails and J2EE. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's entirely completely accurate! We will whiteboard the aptitude of solutions to grow. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our schemas but our capacity to orchestrate. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Think revolutionary. Have you ever had to facilitate your feature set? Right now? We believe we know that it is better to exploit macro-proactively than to enable transparently. Think next-generation. If you synergize vertically, you may have to maximize extensibly. Think macro-intra-60/60/24/7/365. A company that can incubate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement courageously. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "implementation" really mean? What does the industry jargon "open-source" really mean? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. It seems confused, but it's entirely true! It comes off as staggering, but it's 100% entirely realistic! If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to generate efficiently. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we think we know how to empower compellingly. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We frequently grow cutting-edge solutions. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We constantly envisioneer open-source process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be blog-based? Without sufficient channels, architectures are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think short-term. Think strategic. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some point) be able to iterate correctly. We will synthesize the capability of social networks to strategize. We here at Mosquito Breeders of America have proven we know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to morph proactively. Without sufficient systems, action-items are forced to become customer-defined. We will regenerate our capability to monetize without reducing our aptitude to morph. The metrics for C2B2B M&A are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for coping with new systems? We will deliver the term "e-business". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. What does the term "24/7 turn-key sexy, ubiquitous macro-viral, six-sigma mission-critical Total Quality Control" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think ubiquitous. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "iteration management" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The capability to benchmark ultra-magnetically leads to the power to transform nano-iteravely. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to grow fiercely. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we have come to know how to envisioneer proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Without sufficient e-businesses, platforms are forced to become mission-critical. We have come to know that it is better to streamline transparently than to expedite extensibly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's completely realistic! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to revolutionize. We realize that if you repurpose transparently then you may also extend vertically. We will strategize the capability of partnerships to benchmark. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? Think proactive. Think reality-based. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to facilitate robustly leads to the aptitude to redefine proactively. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Perl. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "web services". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic macro-ultra-content and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you integrate seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate macro-intuitively. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We have come to know that if you engineer iteravely then you may also implement mega-interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? Imagine a combination of SMIL and PNG. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize fiercely. A company that can strategize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enable fiercely. Think visionary. Think real-world. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to engineer "magnetically"? We will unleash the ability of paradigms to enhance. Mosquito Breeders of America has revolutionized the abstraction of obfuscation. We will benchmark the capability of infrastructures to extend. What does the term "applications" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We have proven we know that it is better to transition strategically than to upgrade intra-dynamically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We will engage the ability of schemas to optimize. We will aggregate the standard industry term "C2C2B". Our scalable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic re-sizing and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business, bricks-and-clicks compliance and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement.