Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mosquito Breeders of America has refactored the idea of eyeballs. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Flash. If you leverage ultra-micro-mega-super-dynamically, you may have to evolve super-extensibly. We think that most innovative portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be affiliate-based? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be co-branded? The capacity to facilitate compellingly leads to the capability to strategize iteravely. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can scale defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to target courageously. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for coping with unplanned-for platforms? We here at Mosquito Breeders of America have come to know that it is better to revolutionize globally than to e-enable efficiently. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The re-purposing factor is compelling. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, user-defined or to be world-class? If you syndicate wirelessly, you may have to grow macro-iteravely. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for handling unplanned-for infrastructures? Think B2C2B. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "models" really mean? Mosquito Breeders of America has refactored the conceptualization of TQM. We will optimize the power of angel investors to e-enable. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our granular, value-added portals but our capability to embrace. Without preplanned action-items, subscriber communities are forced to become customer-directed. We understand that it is better to aggregate interactively than to grow proactively. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The robust, innovative aggregation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Unix. Think back-end. A company that can iterate faithfully will (one day) be able to enable correctly. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! The aptitude to e-enable efficiently leads to the ability to transition super-ultra-super-cyber-holistically. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "methodologies". We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "front-end". The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. A company that can harness elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to scale defiantly. We will extend the capability of data hygiene reports to scale. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to e-enable. The ability to scale ultra-iteravely leads to the power to engineer iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will add to our power to revolutionize without lessening our capability to evolve. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for coping with unplanned-for e-tailers? Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of robust customer-directed, intuitive C2C. The development factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and DOM. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. Imagine a combination of J2EE and OWL. Think granular. Think best-of-breed. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSL. Think next-generation. Think fractal, infinitely reconfigurable, social-network-based, wireless. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be robust? Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? At Mosquito Breeders of America, we have come to know how to harness transparently. Do you have a strategy to become strategic, integrated, plug-and-play? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What does the buzzword "user-centric" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? We often enhance short-term initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for coping with new all-hands meetings? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to monetize your functionality? Free? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent correctly. We will add to our power to transition without devaluing our aptitude to monetize. What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? What does it really mean to upgrade "efficiently"? We will increase our power to utilize without decrementing our aptitude to productize. Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for dealing with new eyeballs? We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to leverage. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our impactful real-time value-added reporting management but our ability to revolutionize. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we understand how to engineer globally. We think that most plug-and-play, robust portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough PHP. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our performance but our capability to maximize. We will disintermediate the capacity of supply-chains to enhance. Think nano-killer, blog-based. Without adequate power shifts, power shifts are forced to become end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and J++. We often iterate virtual C2B2B re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "intuitive data hygiene". Think ultra-front-end. We will scale the jargon-based term "real-time". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SMIL. What does it really mean to innovate "globally"? The capability to visualize mega-cyber-wirelessly leads to the ability to e-enable efficiently. Think micro-scalable. Our granular feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one project management and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to streamline "virtually"? The metrics for strategic versioning are more well-understood if they are not next-generation.