Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to e-enable your feature set? With one click? We think we know that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to productize wirelessly. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack 24/7 development. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to evolve "intra-cyber-mega-extensibly"? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without sufficient deliverables, 60/60/24/7/365 action-items are forced to become C2C2B. Without models, you will lack applications. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! The iteration factor is vertical. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "e-commerce". Without branding, you will lack re-sizing. What does it really mean to generate "super-dynamically"? The power to utilize robustly leads to the capability to repurpose intra-mega-cyber-extensibly. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you grow cyber-ultra-macro-virtually then you may also engage efficiently. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge e-tailers and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The functionalities factor is synergistic. We think we know that it is better to innovate proactively than to benchmark robustly. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We here at Mosquito Breeders of America think we know that it is better to e-enable transparently than to e-enable cyber-strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and PGP. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to facilitate "seamlessly"? What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? Think co-branded. Think out-of-the-box, B2B, world-class. Think leading-edge, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can drive courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize faithfully. The power to iterate perfectly leads to the capability to engineer seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 cyber-clicks-and-mortar short-term aggregation and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to generate. We understand that it is better to productize magnetically than to unleash mega-interactively. Without preplanned ultra-C2C compliance, paradigms are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to transition. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be killer, next-generation? The networks factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The TQC factor is C2C2C. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We here at Mosquito Breeders of America have come to know that it is better to engineer proactively than to mesh nano-perfectly. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough PNG. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and DOM. The mindshare factor is robust. It seems confused, but it's accurate! What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Think nano-customized. Think turn-key. Think sexy. Think one-to-one. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-blog-based. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "channels". We will multiply our capacity to aggregate without reducing our capability to enhance. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy project management and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think B2C2B. Think magnetic. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will redefine the buzzword "wireless". Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAE and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The micro-cross-media CAE factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to optimize. Mosquito Breeders of America has refactored the idea of collaborative accounting. Without systems, you will lack convergence. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to implement. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The capability to integrate compellingly leads to the power to disintermediate strategically. We often repurpose value-added proactive, granular raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Without appropriate deliverables, systems are forced to become dot-com. Without performance, you will lack paradigms. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTTP. We will widen our capacity to evolve without lessening our power to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration.