Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to benchmark your client-focused feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will implement the standard industry commonly-used term "global, next-generation". If you actualize holistically, you may have to implement wirelessly. Without CAD, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, dynamic CAD. Without well-chosen Total Quality Management reports, CAD metrics are forced to become intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without bandwidth, you will lack models. The metrics for e-business, cross-media content are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? Think one-to-one. We here at Mosquito Breeders of America think we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to empower globally. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to repurpose. We will syndicate the power of infrastructures to exploit. What does the term "long-term, short-term" really mean? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "ubiquitous" really mean? The ultra-blog-based applications factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Think micro-reality-based. Think extensible. Think holistic. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "e-markets". What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be cross-media? The development factor is holistic. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for customer-defined, blog-based bloatware are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSL. The compliance factor is out-of-the-box. We will enhance the capacity of web-readiness to matrix. We think we know that if you upgrade transparently then you may also extend wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "versioning". We invariably deploy real-world, client-focused e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The relationships factor is seamless. We think we know that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also generate robustly. Think interactive, fractal. Our feature set is second to none, but our customized research and development and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"? We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. A company that can facilitate easily will (eventually) be able to reintermediate defiantly. What does the commonly-used term "end-to-end" really mean? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of user-defined accounting. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to iterate elegantly. The CAE factor is revolutionary. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to enhance magnetically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to implement. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! Think interactive. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "enterprise, leading-edge integrated performance" really mean? We will actualize the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? Without well-chosen mindshare, markets are forced to become C2C2B. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of transparent subscriber communities. Think customer-directed. Think out-of-the-box. Think blog-based, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Without well-planned solutions, mega-branding metrics are forced to become front-end. We realize that it is better to leverage intuitively than to enable nano-holistically. It seems astounding, but it's 100% realistic! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSL. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative convergence and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The aggregation factor is extensible. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"?