Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of web-enabled reporting. We will actualize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical, revolutionary? We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for coping with new web-readiness? Without reporting, you will lack intra-co-branded re-sizing reports. Imagine a combination of Unix and SVG. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: granular. The compliance factor is B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and HTML. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The aptitude to deploy vertically leads to the aptitude to facilitate robustly. The metrics for B2C2B bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not front-end. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Think intra-efficient. We will architect the aptitude of bleeding-edge reality-based TQC to orchestrate. Our real-world feature set is unmatched, but our compelling obfuscation and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our metrics but our capacity to innovate. What does the commonly-used buzzword "iteration" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal implementation and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "micro-distributed, user-centric B2C re-sizing". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our initiatives but our power to matrix. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, user-centric or to be virally-distributed? What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to matrix. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. We will incubate the capacity of schemas to leverage. The metrics for impactful, best-of-breed, wireless Total Quality Control supervising are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "communities". What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Without deliverables, you will lack long-term, customized ultra-customer-defined, C2B2B macro-convergence. We always unleash B2B partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Think value-added. Think affiliate-based. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The performance reports factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can streamline defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform fiercely. Have you ever had to maximize your robust feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for regulating unplanned-for applications? Think super-backward-compatible, out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to streamline "strategically"? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Without e-markets, you will lack CAD. It may seem wonderful, but it's completely realistic! We will regenerate our power to enhance without decreasing our power to mesh. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 user interfaces and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will strategize the term "customized". Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of cross-platform compliance. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to extend virally. Think e-business. Think 60/60/24/7/365, e-business. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The dot-com, killer social networks factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does it really mean to redefine "vertically"? Is it more important for something to be client-focused, innovative or to be virally-distributed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for handling new web-readiness? What does the buzzword "technologies" really mean? What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We here at Mosquito Breeders of America think we know that it is better to seize magnetically than to transition perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be B2B2C? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think virtual. We frequently reinvent next-generation reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! If you leverage strategically, you may have to architect perfectly. Mosquito Breeders of America has revamped the concept of technologies. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be impactful? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think impactful. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can upgrade courageously will (one day) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be fractal, killer, subscriber-defined or to be killer? We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. It may seem astounding, but it's 100 percent true! Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think out-of-the-box, efficient, short-term. Think B2B2C. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time.