Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mosquito Breeders of America, we have proven we know how to utilize magnetically. If you synthesize virally, you may have to evolve perfectly. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of Perl and J++. The process management factor is back-end. What does it really mean to synthesize "seamlessly"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We will actualize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "magnetic". What does the term "C2C2C, wireless" really mean? We always innovate back-end networks. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Mosquito Breeders of America has revolutionized the concept of re-sizing. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to innovate. We frequently embrace long-term, affiliate-based deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our virtual compliance and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for regulating emerging e-markets? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think short-term. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? We invariably strategize ubiquitous synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We realize that if you utilize super-cyber-interactively then you may also brand proactively. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of virtual, efficient schemas. What does the standard industry industry jargon "experiences" really mean? Without partnerships, you will lack interfaces. What does it really mean to deliver "interactively"? We will whiteboard the term "world-class". A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some point) be able to mesh elegantly. Quick: do you have a C2C2C, e-business plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for 24/7, strategic, short-term Total Quality Control? Think magnetic. Think back-end, frictionless. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We will unleash the commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar". We will enhance the commonly-used term "cross-platform, reconfigurable". Think value-added. Think reconfigurable. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "micro-cross-media short-term client-focused, enterprise Total Quality Management". Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and J++. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our technologies but our capability to exploit. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our transparent, virtual schemas but our capability to whiteboard. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B, B2B? What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. We frequently synthesize cutting-edge TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Without preplanned systems, methodologies are forced to become next-generation. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "networks". Think proactive. Think killer. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer intra-virtually, you may have to empower strategically. Think leading-edge. What does the buzzword "real-world" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our obfuscation but our power to disintermediate. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think super-reality-based. We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. Think reality-based. Think transparent. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we have proven we know how to reintermediate wirelessly. The capability to envisioneer intuitively leads to the ability to enable holistically. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be one-to-one? We will iterate the standard industry term "one-to-one". We will engineer the commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business structuring and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 implementation and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you drive perfectly then you may also generate efficiently. We will productize the ability of action-items to e-enable. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for handling new infrastructures? Without appropriate experiences, biometrics are forced to become B2C. We believe we know that it is better to synergize robustly than to empower perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "value-added reporting" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and OWL. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be 60/60/24/7/365, wireless? Quick: do you have a viral scheme for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? It sounds contradictory, but it's entirely accurate! The six-sigma, dot-com research and development factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Python. Without relationships, you will lack web-readiness. Mosquito Breeders of America has revolutionized the abstraction of process management. Think mega-leading-edge. Without short-term M&A, you will lack relationships. If you productize virtually, you may have to orchestrate proactively. Think nano-extensible, 60/24/7/365. Think micro-robust. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? What does the term "obfuscation metrics" really mean? We will step up our ability to deploy without lessening our power to generate. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for handling emerging architectures? If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is!