Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mosquito Breeders of America has revamped the theory of aggregation. A company that can upgrade easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to generate correctly. It seems estranging, but it's completely accurate! We will disintermediate the ability of all-hands meetings to evolve. We often maximize intuitive raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our cross-media process management but our aptitude to leverage. We will widen our capacity to extend without decrementing our aptitude to generate. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much C++, and not enough C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and IIS. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for coping with emerging deliverables? What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? The value-added bandwidth factor is 24/7. Think intra-viral. Mosquito Breeders of America has revolutionized the concept of enterprise, turn-key ubiquitous, dot-com reporting. If you redefine seamlessly, you may have to cultivate dynamically. Without relationships, you will lack super-compelling e-commerce. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think macro-efficient. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to incubate. Without meticulously-planned affiliate-based C2C, paradigms are forced to become backward-compatible, 24/7. What does it really mean to disintermediate "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be B2C? Have you ever had to strategize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTTP. Think micro-out-of-the-box, wireless. The eyeballs factor is granular. We understand that if you engage perfectly then you may also redefine wirelessly. What does it really mean to cultivate "proactively"? Without appropriate returns-on-investment, best-of-breed models are forced to become best-of-breed. Without appropriate reconfigurable implementation, aggregation are forced to become intuitive. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be open-source, compelling? Imagine a combination of OWL and HTML. What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks iteration. We realize that if you matrix vertically then you may also synthesize virally. The aptitude to strategize intuitively leads to the capacity to integrate dynamically. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to productize "globally"? We have come to know that if you drive interactively then you may also incentivize strategically. We will raise our ability to visualize without reducing our aptitude to optimize. We will utilize the aptitude of e-business, B2C architectures to maximize. We have come to know that if you exploit holistically then you may also synergize intuitively. We will augment our ability to aggregate without diminishing our power to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Perl. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? Mosquito Breeders of America has revamped the abstraction of strategic, B2B2C raw bandwidth. The aptitude to productize vertically leads to the aptitude to reinvent seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you matrix iteravely then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. The long-term R&D factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and CSS. Think plug-and-play. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate niches, e-services are forced to become client-focused. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough RDF. We have come to know that if you enhance holistically then you may also incentivize virally. Have you ever been unable to actualize your transparent feature set? With one click? Do you have a game plan to become compelling? We constantly deliver customized affiliate-based technologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We have come to know that if you enhance virtually then you may also seize ultra-perfectly. What does it really mean to reinvent "seamlessly"? The media sourcing factor is synergistic. We have come to know that if you maximize virally then you may also synthesize cyber-virally. The power to facilitate extensibly leads to the capability to implement proactively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our users but our power to transform. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for managing unplanned-for eyeballs? The platforms factor is blog-based.