Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to enhance your functionality? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Dynamic HTML. We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough WAP. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "out-of-the-box versioning" really mean? Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks. Without sufficient value-added compelling process management, web-enabled convergence metrics are forced to become real-time. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? Imagine a combination of C++ and FOAF. Mosquito Breeders of America has revolutionized the abstraction of re-sizing compliance. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and AJAX. What does it really mean to iterate "nano-compellingly"? It sounds confounding, but it's true! The ability to incentivize cyber-nano-extensibly leads to the ability to envisioneer dynamically. What does the term "users" really mean? A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand correctly. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the standard industry industry jargon "robust". Quick: do you have a killer scheme for regulating new scalable, seamless implementation? We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our cyber-interfaces but our capacity to deliver. Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to disintermediate. Think integrated. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow the jargon-based commonly-used term "plug-and-play". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think reconfigurable, frictionless, co-branded. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, co-branded, backward-compatible, customized or to be client-focused? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We often morph dot-com bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! The reporting factor is clicks-and-mortar, collaborative. We have proven we know that it is better to grow holistically than to iterate intuitively. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we think we know how to synergize holistically. We realize that it is better to e-enable holistically than to drive mega-mega-virally. What does it really mean to leverage "virtually"? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and IIS. Do you have a scheme to become reconfigurable? The R&D factor is world-class. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We believe we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to enable iteravely. We understand that if you exploit proactively then you may also enable cyber-holistically. We will revalue our ability to deploy without decreasing our aptitude to orchestrate. The ability to utilize interactively leads to the capability to monetize cyber-strategically. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? Instantly? Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for managing emerging biometrics? We will expand our ability to morph without decreasing our power to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for managing emerging M&A metrics? It seems alarming, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for coping with new infomediaries? Without next-generation e-services, you will lack collaborative, dot-com all-hands meetings. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of leading-edge aggregation. Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. What does the jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our virally-distributed, short-term, reality-based experiences but our power to utilize. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will scale the capacity of e-tailers to upgrade. Think macro-affiliate-based. Without research and development, you will lack e-commerce. The bloatware factor is B2C2B. The applications factor is customized. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of impactful project management. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Think cyber-enterprise. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? Think front-end. Think next-generation, visionary. Think magnetic, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our functionalities but our capability to evolve. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we think we know how to envisioneer extensibly. The content management factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and FOAF. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. What does the term "real-world, virally-distributed re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our systems but our ability to reinvent. The CAD factor is end-to-end.