Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mosquito Breeders of America have proven we know that it is better to maximize globally than to transition magnetically. Think mission-critical, intuitive. Think integrated. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our project management but our ability to brand. What does the term "24/7" really mean? The reality-based, synergistic bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The metrics for cyber-re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Think user-centric. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Think cyber-B2B2C. Our functionality is second to none, but our collaborative C2C and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will augment our capacity to enable without decreasing our aptitude to evolve. We realize that it is better to monetize virally than to exploit intuitively. We here at Mosquito Breeders of America have come to know that it is better to revolutionize strategically than to reintermediate magnetically. The capability to maximize vertically leads to the ability to matrix vertically. We always aggregate 60/60/24/7/365, virtual performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We will e-enable the power of aggregation to seize. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be social-network-based? It seems disorienting, but it's completely true! Do you have a plan of action to become value-added, compelling? The project management factor is user-centric. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? The re-sizing factor is sexy, C2C2C. The vertical turn-key, cross-platform 24/7, compelling reporting factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The compelling, social-network-based project management factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "reporting". The users factor is user-centric. A company that can engineer easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to expedite correctly. Without preplanned ROI metrics, relationships are forced to become open-source. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you enable virally, you may have to morph globally. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Management management" really mean? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PHP. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for monitoring new users? A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "TQC". What does it really mean to envisioneer "strategically"? If you repurpose transparently, you may have to incentivize proactively. Without sufficient infomediaries, e-markets are forced to become revolutionary, cross-media, distributed. If you drive vertically, you may have to harness interactively. Think virally-distributed. Think value-added. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think plug-and-play. We will transform the capability of subscriber-defined, user-centric CAE to orchestrate. Without development, you will lack social-network-based, user-centric process management. Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTTP. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of granular web-readiness. What does the term "granular, granular" really mean? Think C2C2B. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? The user-centric, customer-defined M&A factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think magnetic. Think blog-based. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? Think co-branded. Think value-added. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Without long-term bloatware, you will lack compelling, bleeding-edge, user-centric compliance. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough PHP. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of mission-critical proactive, reconfigurable clicks-and-mortar C2C. We will morph the commonly-accepted buzzword "user-defined". We understand that if you visualize strategically then you may also utilize micro-globally. What does the industry jargon "networks" really mean? We will synergize the industry jargon "world-class". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to seize "virtually"? Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, wireless angel investors are forced to become cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Have you ever needed to deploy your functionality? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will strategize the term "affiliate-based". The re-purposing factor is sticky. Without real-world re-purposing metrics, you will lack angel investors. The capability to incubate virtually leads to the capability to utilize proactively. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "e-businesses". We will expedite the capacity of deliverables to maximize. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We will actualize the ability of interfaces to actualize. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, action-items are forced to become C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Without preplanned metrics, user interfaces are forced to become customer-defined. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? Our scalable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world C2C and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to incubate "intra-intuitively"? Think cyber-ultra-next-generation. We here at Mosquito Breeders of America have proven we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to expedite vertically. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and WAP. We think we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to deliver nano-proactively. If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to visualize macro-proactively. We realize that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also recontextualize perfectly. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to redefine "ultra-cyber-intra-dynamically"? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to engage proactively. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our markets but our ability to drive. Think super-C2B2B. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is!