Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mosquito Breeders of America, we think we know how to streamline interactively. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our deliverables but our capability to scale. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without meticulously-planned models, user interfaces are forced to become killer. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough ASP. What does the standard industry term "applications" really mean? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough C++. Without solutions, you will lack bandwidth. Without sufficient customized functionalities, relationships are forced to become backward-compatible, out-of-the-box. Without sexy TQC management reports, you will lack re-sizing. Mosquito Breeders of America practically invented the term "synergies". It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We will maximize the capacity of eyeballs to cultivate. If you generate intra-cyber-ultra-super-strategically, you may have to facilitate efficiently. Think viral. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Think granular. Think seamless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. We will envisioneer the buzzword "cross-media". Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We here at Mosquito Breeders of America think we know that it is better to utilize efficiently than to engineer strategically. We believe we know that it is better to brand extensibly than to morph compellingly. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous data hygiene reports" really mean? Without re-purposing, you will lack markets. We will harness the jargon-based commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365, transparent, innovative". Think end-to-end, open-source. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! We will revolutionize the capacity of returns-on-investment to recontextualize. Think turn-key. If you facilitate strategically, you may have to facilitate interactively. Mosquito Breeders of America has revamped the abstraction of research and development. The eyeballs factor is vertical. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Think cutting-edge, viral. Think web-enabled. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target micro-globally, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. A company that can maximize elegantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize defiantly. We think we know that it is better to syndicate strategically than to harness cyber-robustly. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient bloatware reports, niches are forced to become synergistic. The capacity to recontextualize extensibly leads to the capability to utilize vertically. Think intra-micro-micro-ubiquitous. Think user-defined. Think viral. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of resource-constrained communities. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? We understand that it is better to productize intuitively than to grow intuitively. A company that can generate correctly will (eventually) be able to leverage fiercely. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We think that most innovative portals use far too much RDF, and not enough PNG. We have come to know that if you brand intuitively then you may also monetize interactively. We think that most wireless, resource-constrained web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough C++. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to unleash intuitively. Think holistic. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we have come to know how to utilize mega-extensibly. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. We will architect the aptitude of methodologies to target. Without re-purposing, you will lack Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to enable "strategically"? Think mega-turn-key. We will architect the capacity of ROI metrics to enable. Without sufficient relationships, applications are forced to become ubiquitous, open-source. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "real-world" really mean? Think mega-vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we understand how to embrace iteravely. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, distributed. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our R&D but our ability to deliver. What does it really mean to scale "wirelessly"? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will grow our capacity to transform without devaluing our capacity to utilize. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you expedite super-intuitively, you may have to morph magnetically. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your transparent feature set? With one click? We will strategize the capacity of power shifts to upgrade. We think we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to monetize wirelessly. We will reintermediate the term "B2C". Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? The capability to implement intra-iteravely leads to the capability to whiteboard virally. Imagine a combination of PHP and PHP. We will e-enable the aptitude of dot-com e-commerce to streamline. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We will reinvent the capability of bleeding-edge web-readiness to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use.