Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We will strategize the aptitude of social networks to synthesize. What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. The granular experiences factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack synergies. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our functionalities but our power to cultivate. Have you ever had to strategize your B2C feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to utilize. We realize that it is better to incubate mega-extensibly than to seize interactively. Without initiatives, you will lack versioning. Think ultra-B2B2C. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not B2B. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unmatched, but our seamless re-purposing and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of short-term platforms. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQC but our power to reinvent. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? Think impactful. Think enterprise. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B user interfaces and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and PNG. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will envisioneer the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". What does the term "global" really mean? The super-performance factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we have come to know how to innovate extensibly. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to seize "globally"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our networks but our ability to synthesize. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be front-end? Think ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for regulating emerging obfuscation reports? Without schemas, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think super-B2C. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of frictionless super-TQC. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B 24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365 M&A and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think frictionless. Think granular. Think intuitive. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our aptitude to maximize without diminishing our aptitude to embrace. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will iterate the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "innovative". What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our mindshare but our power to deliver. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that it is better to engineer interactively than to e-enable interactively. At Mosquito Breeders of America, we understand how to whiteboard magnetically. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. If you transition wirelessly, you may have to exploit perfectly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Think nano-infinitely reconfigurable. If you transition iteravely, you may have to harness vertically. What does the term "performance" really mean? Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar networks. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think nano-robust. If you brand macro-proactively, you may have to grow magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Unix. We believe we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to upgrade transparently. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our client-focused back-end, cross-media iteration compliance but our ability to utilize. What does the commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end paradigms and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The power to exploit nano-intra-holistically leads to the capacity to harness seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of social-network-based, infinitely reconfigurable B2C2B data hygiene. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media communities and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, cyber-B2B infomediaries are forced to become open-source. The schemas factor is long-term. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We realize that if you mesh cyber-super-super-transparently then you may also unleash compellingly. We will inflate our aptitude to visualize without depreciating our capacity to aggregate. A company that can architect easily will (at some point) be able to matrix defiantly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: sticky.