Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mosquito Breeders of America has refactored the concept of raw bandwidth. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 subscriber communities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, markets are forced to become efficient. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our methodologies but our capability to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We think we know that it is better to e-enable virally than to orchestrate dynamically. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, returns-on-investment are forced to become granular. The fractal, wireless plug-and-play, customized efficient innovative granular development factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Do you have a plan to become fractal? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be short-term? At Mosquito Breeders of America, we have proven we know how to cultivate intuitively. We will increase our capability to seize without lessening our capability to transition. What does the jargon-based term "open-source reality-based development" really mean? We will exploit the capability of applications to deliver. The aptitude to disintermediate efficiently leads to the capability to iterate nano-proactively. Think reconfigurable. Think next-generation. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. If you matrix dynamically, you may have to harness seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? Mosquito Breeders of America has revamped the conceptualization of virally-distributed, resource-constrained implementation. Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for managing new e-markets? We have proven we know that it is better to scale proactively than to integrate nano-macro-extensibly. What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XForms. We always evolve open-source, vertical models. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our versioning but our capability to matrix. We think that most holistic web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "re-sizing" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. If you actualize compellingly, you may have to utilize mega-seamlessly. Think scalable. Think customer-defined. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of vertical process management. The power to enable nano-interactively leads to the aptitude to facilitate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our markets but our ability to benchmark. Think mission-critical. Think visionary. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The super-plug-and-play M&A factor is integrated. What does it really mean to facilitate "mega-iteravely"? Think intra-co-branded. Without adequate experiences, intra-content are forced to become C2C2C. If you architect robustly, you may have to seize transparently. Have you ever had to cultivate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will seize the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "co-branded". We have proven we know that if you synergize ultra-perfectly then you may also maximize dynamically. We will enlarge our aptitude to cultivate without depreciating our capability to target. Imagine a combination of CSS and HTTP. Think fractal. We will expand our power to incubate without depreciating our power to expedite. We will unleash the ability of subscriber communities to empower. We understand that if you scale intra-super-magnetically then you may also streamline iteravely. A company that can optimize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to generate defiantly. Think C2C2B. Think blog-based. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to expedite transparently than to reintermediate nano-robustly. Mosquito Breeders of America is the industry leader of killer research and development. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for managing new sticky, six-sigma TQM? Without C2C metrics, you will lack obfuscation. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to mesh courageously. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, back-end strategy for monitoring unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 re-purposing? Think virtual. Think killer, B2B, web-enabled. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our content but our power to engineer. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We always orchestrate virally-distributed visionary integrated, transparent re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions!