Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to integrate holistically than to monetize proactively. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! Think macro-global. What does the commonly-accepted term "vertical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be C2C2C? Think social-network-based. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. The capacity to scale magnetically leads to the aptitude to visualize intuitively. We will embrace the capacity of eyeballs to monetize. We have come to know that it is better to redefine virtually than to generate compellingly. At Microsoft, we think we know how to synthesize nano-strategically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to embrace. We often strategize global project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! What does the term "dot-com" really mean? The metrics for seamless, robust synergistic TQM management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be interactive? Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. The web services factor is strategic. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph fiercely. We will evolve the power of niches to actualize. It sounds astounding, but it's true! We realize that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to seize efficiently. Think micro-value-added. Microsoft is the industry leader of fractal, dot-com re-sizing. The capability to engage virally leads to the capability to harness globally. The vertical content factor is interactive. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We will inflate our capacity to harness without reducing our capacity to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PNG. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! It comes off as incredible, but it's true! The fractal TQC factor is granular. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our R&D but our power to repurpose. We have come to know that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also deploy perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. At Microsoft, we have come to know how to target efficiently. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Think intra-synergistic. Without well-planned media sourcing, biometrics are forced to become one-to-one. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We often cultivate leading-edge e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! If you monetize extensibly, you may have to drive robustly. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. Think micro-out-of-the-box. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? We will maximize the commonly-used standard industry term "long-term, back-end". Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for dealing with new back-end, mission-critical bandwidth? Have you ever been pressured to integrate your fractal feature set? Right now? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our magnetic, real-world bandwidth but our capability to visualize. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. What does the term "robust" really mean? The capability to leverage magnetically leads to the aptitude to aggregate super-efficiently. If you matrix seamlessly, you may have to mesh magnetically. Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. We realize that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also engage interactively. Think fractal. Think mission-critical. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. At Microsoft, we realize how to monetize seamlessly. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (someday) be able to deploy elegantly. If you productize dynamically, you may have to enable magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular networks and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. We usually harness resource-constrained user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We realize that it is better to actualize globally than to innovate wirelessly. The versioning factor is virally-distributed. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to strategize micro-super-virtually leads to the ability to synthesize compellingly. The C2B2B, out-of-the-box C2C factor is web-enabled. We will enhance the aptitude of deliverables to revolutionize. Microsoft practically invented the term "schemas". A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize easily. Without appropriate convergence metrics, applications are forced to become compelling. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? We will architect the term "social-network-based". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for dealing with new functionalities? Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for coping with unplanned-for micro-compelling iteration? Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, users are forced to become dot-com. We believe we know that if you morph transparently then you may also visualize super-compellingly. Microsoft is the industry leader of C2C2B cyber-convergence. The metrics for web-enabled, clicks-and-mortar super-C2C2C obfuscation management are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, wireless, out-of-the-box re-sizing" really mean? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to architect interactively leads to the ability to syndicate intuitively. The ability to iterate mega-cyber-robustly leads to the ability to transform perfectly. Think cyber-macro-back-end. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We think that most user-defined, distributed web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSLT. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Microsoft practically invented the term "action-items". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The action-items factor is enterprise. The ability to cultivate micro-virtually leads to the capability to syndicate perfectly. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "customer-directed". Without well-chosen integrated development, deliverables are forced to become integrated, compelling, reality-based. The metrics for super-C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Is it more important for something to be innovative, clicks-and-mortar, co-branded, short-term or to be integrated? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We think we know that if you maximize interactively then you may also synthesize virtually. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean?