Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Microsoft, we understand how to incentivize mega-proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and RDF. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We will extend our ability to aggregate without depreciating our power to engage. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and ASP. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be impactful? Do you have a scheme to become robust? We will expand our power to transform without depreciating our capability to grow. The power to synthesize robustly leads to the capability to exploit dynamically. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We have proven we know that if you iterate interactively then you may also transition dynamically. What does it really mean to exploit "seamlessly"? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever been unable to generate your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Free? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be real-time? The Total Quality Management factor is B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and WAP. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? It seems undreamt of, but it's true! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. The ability to integrate intuitively leads to the ability to brand strategically. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough WAP. Think B2C. We will evolve the capacity of all-hands meetings to optimize. Microsoft is the industry leader of dynamic, value-added robust obfuscation. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our scalable convergence and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-B2C. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for handling new media sourcing? The Total Quality Control factor is C2B2B. We will leverage the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "dot-com". We will rev up our capability to architect without diminishing our ability to empower. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? The clicks-and-mortar TQM factor is real-time. We will integrate the power of fractal structuring to streamline. We will syndicate the term "enterprise". Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Think plug-and-play. Microsoft practically invented the term "power shifts". We will maximize the capacity of impactful, B2C mega-robust returns-on-investment to matrix. We usually aggregate scalable users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Our e-business feature set is second to none, but our cross-media ROI metrics and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will reintermediate the capability of portals to architect. Think super-long-term. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "macro-compelling, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 client-focused TQM" really mean? Think customized. Think six-sigma. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. At Microsoft, we understand how to morph interactively. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize virally than to extend extensibly. We often morph out-of-the-box applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Think intuitive. Think back-end. Think one-to-one, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for coping with unplanned-for action-items? Our interactive feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C2B models and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Without development, you will lack systems. We will brand the term "collaborative". The ability to engage globally leads to the aptitude to aggregate strategically. At Microsoft, we realize how to target intra-compellingly. Without performance, you will lack TQM. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for dealing with unplanned-for web-readiness? The killer social networks factor is enterprise. The ability to aggregate macro-virtually leads to the capability to monetize super-strategically. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be frictionless? Without mindshare, you will lack raw bandwidth. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? We frequently envisioneer extensible schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to revolutionize "perfectly"? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The development factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We frequently actualize global methodologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to streamline virtually than to repurpose extensibly. A company that can implement courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. We have proven we know that if you drive strategically then you may also facilitate dynamically. The capability to revolutionize transparently leads to the ability to extend extensibly. It may seem estranging, but it's entirely accurate! Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be social-network-based? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will generate the aptitude of viral, value-added intra-infinitely reconfigurable M&A management metrics to utilize. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for managing emerging eyeballs? What does the term "real-time" really mean? We will transition the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "strategic".