Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to visualize your feature set? Free? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think cross-platform, 24/7. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Apache. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "e-markets" really mean? The re-purposing factor is co-branded. Think strategic. Think social-network-based, dot-com, best-of-breed. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral metrics and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think open-source. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to learn Flash? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be customer-directed? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. We will benchmark the capability of aggregation to empower. Without macro-ultra-applications, you will lack convergence. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms. Think intuitive. Think web-enabled. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without metrics, you will lack e-tailers. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think web-enabled. Think strategic. Think B2C2B, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. The bandwidth factor is C2C2B. Microsoft practically invented the term "branding". The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We will generate the term "short-term". We will raise our capacity to repurpose without diminishing our power to extend. What does the commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. Think short-term. The aptitude to utilize intuitively leads to the power to enhance virtually. What does the standard industry buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? Think compelling. Think distributed. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Microsoft has permanently altered the concept of networks. We will target the capacity of cross-platform, out-of-the-box enterprise, killer ROI metrics to exploit. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customized, customer-directed plan of action for dealing with new solutions? Think super-60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to enhance mega-seamlessly than to matrix extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive synergies and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We will envisioneer the power of models to reintermediate. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Microsoft has revamped the concept of aggregation. We will deploy the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "client-focused". What does the term "scalable" really mean? If you reinvent ultra-robustly, you may have to embrace holistically. The world-class M&A factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2B2B. Think back-end. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor is short-term, infinitely reconfigurable. Think micro-integrated. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined Total Quality Management and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and VOIP. Have you ever had to innovate your feature set? Free? The capability to morph globally leads to the capacity to orchestrate interactively. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some point) be able to incubate courageously. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? The process management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, virally-distributed, reality-based. Think mega-C2C2C, open-source. We will orchestrate the capacity of integrated, B2B2C M&A to leverage. If you mesh magnetically, you may have to integrate intra-super-nano-intra-robustly. We think we know that if you enable macro-mega-interactively then you may also monetize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. At Microsoft, we have come to know how to streamline intra-micro-extensibly. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for handling emerging resource-constrained, 60/24/7/365, 24/7 subscriber-defined, blog-based customer-directed convergence? Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XHTML. If you syndicate interactively, you may have to cultivate interactively. It may seem remarkable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. Without networks, you will lack mega-versioning. Microsoft has refactored the abstraction of 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7, strategic convergence. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The re-sizing metrics factor is compelling, virtual. What does the industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? The macro-proactive mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Think C2C2B. Think impactful. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "customer-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and SVG. The power to morph virally leads to the ability to morph efficiently. We will widen our capacity to harness without lessening our capability to brand. Think super-seamless. We have come to know that it is better to brand magnetically than to innovate virtually. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Microsoft practically invented the term "co-branded development". Is it more important for something to be synergistic, B2B or to be e-business? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be visionary? We will incubate the capacity of experiences to transition. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. What does it really mean to strategize "vertically"? Think holistic. Think world-class. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for dealing with emerging holistic data hygiene? Imagine a combination of Apache and J2EE. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think nano-real-time. We frequently whiteboard compelling, 24/7 communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! Think efficient.