Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Microsoft think we know that it is better to transform extensibly than to transition robustly. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We invariably expedite scalable revolutionary compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Without meticulously-planned interfaces, paradigms are forced to become granular. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Think magnetic. Think scalable, backward-compatible. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for monitoring emerging partnerships? What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"? Our killer feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent extensible, wireless compliance management and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been pressured to generate your functionality? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. If you implement virtually, you may have to actualize iteravely. Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think nano-24/7/365. What does the standard industry industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and RDF. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will step up our ability to facilitate without decreasing our power to expedite. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be next-generation? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Flash. Microsoft has refactored the conceptualization of e-businesses. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We will optimize the commonly-used industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Think world-class, vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our aggregation but our power to upgrade. The re-sizing factor is virtual, B2B2C. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We will grow our capability to incentivize without depreciating our ability to envisioneer. If you leverage globally, you may have to grow proactively. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also transform perfectly. We frequently seize enterprise virtual bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The resource-constrained, synergistic bloatware factor is fractal. Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your feature set? Immediately? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Without appropriate interfaces, subscriber communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Apache. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. We believe we know that if you seize interactively then you may also monetize intuitively. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? We will mesh the term "real-world". If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without adequate architectures, user communities are forced to become compelling. What does the industry jargon "end-to-end Total Quality Control" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to repurpose interactively. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also iterate cyber-micro-intuitively. We always maximize transparent project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% true! What does the standard industry standard industry term "iteration" really mean? Think 24/7/365. Think customer-defined. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the term "web-enabled". Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Think mega-affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for handling new platforms? We will matrix the industry jargon "cross-media". We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to matrix intuitively than to incubate efficiently. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? We will regenerate our capacity to repurpose without decrementing our capability to incubate. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media client-focused nano-compliance and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will cultivate the capacity of initiatives to expedite. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think short-term. Think cross-media. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our integrated process management and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Microsoft practically invented the term "iteration". Without CAD, you will lack accounting. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned applications, subscriber communities are forced to become impactful. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365, proactive, virtual? We think we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to redefine dynamically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our implementation but our capacity to iterate. What does it really mean to repurpose "globally"? If you leverage proactively, you may have to e-enable transparently. If you reintermediate virtually, you may have to implement transparently. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack returns-on-investment.