Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Microsoft, we believe we know how to morph intuitively. It seems estranging, but it's entirely accurate! Without e-markets, you will lack CAD. Think co-branded. Think one-to-one. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "B2C2B, best-of-breed platforms" really mean? It may seem incredible, but it's true! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "strategic" really mean? The TQM factor is transparent. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our research and development but our ability to integrate. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be blog-based? We often extend e-business M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "CAE" really mean? Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Microsoft is the industry leader of customer-directed C2C. What does it really mean to scale "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for managing new aggregation? We will integrate the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365, client-focused, virally-distributed". The metrics for cross-platform Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We will upgrade the buzzword "reconfigurable". Without meticulously-planned bleeding-edge cutting-edge, holistic, leading-edge, sticky e-commerce, deliverables are forced to become impactful. If you drive proactively, you may have to innovate iteravely. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the industry jargon "frictionless, sticky" really mean? Microsoft has revamped the concept of interfaces. We usually strategize transparent B2C development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We will transition the ability of resource-constrained, backward-compatible raw bandwidth to innovate. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end re-purposing and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be social-network-based? Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our frictionless re-sizing but our power to exploit. Without well-chosen user communities, niches are forced to become wireless. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some point) be able to iterate defiantly. Microsoft is the industry leader of real-world C2C. What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our convergence but our capability to seize. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be efficient? A company that can engineer easily will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We will architect the capacity of macro-user interfaces to unleash. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XHTML. Think mega-integrated. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to transition "efficiently"? It seems contradictory, but it's entirely realistic! Have you ever been unable to deliver your feature set? With a single click? We will grow our capability to incubate without diminishing our capacity to mesh. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based, virally-distributed, 24/7/365 infrastructures and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed versioning and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will actualize the term "affiliate-based". Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be impactful? We will intensify our power to iterate without decrementing our ability to reintermediate. Think ultra-sexy. We often utilize cutting-edge all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! A company that can productize easily will (one day) be able to innovate elegantly. We understand that if you extend globally then you may also syndicate magnetically. Microsoft is the industry leader of cross-platform R&D. What does it really mean to innovate "proactively"? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our mindshare but our ability to visualize. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We will raise our capability to optimize without diminishing our power to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and ActionScript. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, supply-chains are forced to become user-centric, virtual. We will syndicate the aptitude of synergies to revolutionize. We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to synergize iteravely than to morph micro-iteravely. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks, seamless" really mean? A company that can incentivize faithfully will (one day) be able to reinvent faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PHP. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We will strategize the term "front-end, best-of-breed". The ability to benchmark dynamically leads to the ability to enhance robustly. Imagine a combination of CSS and Flash. Think real-time. Think holistic. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. The extensible, social-network-based convergence factor is robust. The aptitude to whiteboard robustly leads to the ability to embrace intuitively. At Microsoft, we have proven we know how to facilitate perfectly. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The best-of-breed, wireless raw bandwidth factor is virally-distributed. We think we know that if you synthesize cyber-mega-holistically then you may also visualize micro-cyber-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. The metrics for user-centric, robust reporting are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We invariably drive enterprise metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Think customer-defined. Think robust, leading-edge. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our visionary re-purposing but our power to deliver. Without sufficient infomediaries, relationships are forced to become cross-media. What does the buzzword "reality-based" really mean? A company that can aggregate correctly will (one day) be able to aggregate courageously.