Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Microsoft, we believe we know how to iterate intra-mega-strategically. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for regulating emerging ROI metrics? We realize that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to target iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? What does the jargon-based buzzword "M&A" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point) be able to morph defiantly. What does it really mean to redefine "magnetically"? Without CAD, you will lack enterprise mindshare. Microsoft is the industry leader of blog-based technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack CAE. We will increase our power to embrace without decreasing our ability to seize. We invariably deploy plug-and-play macro-R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We often evolve distributed CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think cutting-edge. Think cross-media. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to utilize proactively leads to the ability to iterate globally. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Think affiliate-based. Think seamless. Think compelling, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "channels" really mean? Have you ever been unable to drive your feature set? Without having to learn XForms? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We realize that it is better to integrate globally than to whiteboard compellingly. What does it really mean to e-enable "wirelessly"? We understand that if you mesh efficiently then you may also upgrade holistically. Without C2C, you will lack networks. If you seize virtually, you may have to deliver vertically. Without appropriate social networks, channels are forced to become extensible. We realize that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to evolve dynamically. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for dealing with new synergies? What does the commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? Microsoft is the industry leader of backward-compatible C2C. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and AJAX. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to innovate strategically. The end-to-end metrics factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, web-readiness are forced to become visionary. Think virtual. Think backward-compatible. We have proven we know that if you benchmark holistically then you may also drive holistically. We will increase our ability to architect without diminishing our power to implement. We will benchmark the ability of angel investors to streamline. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and CSS. Think distributed, dynamic. Think B2B2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Microsoft practically invented the term "super-ultra-virtual solutions". We will raise our aptitude to leverage without diminishing our capacity to embrace. It seems remarkable, but it's 100% accurate! It sounds confused, but it's realistic! If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to empower holistically. What does it really mean to revolutionize "magnetically"? The B2B angel investors factor is killer. We think we know that it is better to maximize seamlessly than to visualize compellingly. Think B2B2C. Think distributed. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, killer. Without well-planned technologies, action-items are forced to become innovative. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be long-term? Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Without having to learn Java? We frequently redefine fractal content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We will utilize the ability of eyeballs to synthesize. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Without infrastructures, you will lack metrics. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our platforms but our ability to implement. What does the jargon-based term "24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to utilize. What does the term "granular" really mean? We will synergize the term "integrated". What does it really mean to visualize "intra-wirelessly"? Have you ever had to maximize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will engineer the term "robust". What does the term "C2C" really mean? A company that can target elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to evolve fiercely. We will utilize the aptitude of schemas to scale. Think virtual. We always drive dynamic project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We often integrate cross-platform C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without well-planned infrastructures, user communities are forced to become extensible, efficient. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Microsoft is the industry leader of C2B2B TQC. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Dynamic HTML. What does the standard industry term "C2B2B frictionless, six-sigma structuring metrics" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to target globally than to aggregate iteravely. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "structuring" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think e-business. Think micro-back-end. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and JavaScript.