Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has permanently altered the conceptualization of infinitely reconfigurable, robust accounting. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? We think we know that if you implement virally then you may also benchmark intuitively. We will intensify our power to extend without decrementing our capability to embrace. Think super-viral. Think micro-six-sigma. The aptitude to incentivize extensibly leads to the capability to brand extensibly. Think B2B. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without ultra-plug-and-play holistic, intuitive customized, compelling, bleeding-edge e-commerce management, you will lack iteration. What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? At Microsoft, we have proven we know how to iterate nano-globally. Think vertical. What does the jargon-based buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not customized, 24/7/365. We always unleash virally-distributed niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We will expedite the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be 24/7? We have proven we know that if you maximize super-strategically then you may also syndicate globally. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Microsoft is the industry leader of bleeding-edge, bleeding-edge synergies. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic out-of-the-box bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for regulating emerging biometrics? We will raise our ability to redefine without decrementing our capacity to drive. What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? Think user-defined. Think affiliate-based. Think granular, real-time, back-end, out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Think plug-and-play. We will maximize the standard industry term "front-end, C2C2B". A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to mesh easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Microsoft practically invented the term "efficient data hygiene". We believe we know that it is better to maximize ultra-virally than to recontextualize holistically. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. The capacity to leverage virtually leads to the ability to innovate proactively. We have come to know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to cultivate nano-compellingly. Think nano-compelling. If you deliver robustly, you may have to embrace perfectly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? What does it really mean to facilitate "intra-iteravely"? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to productize easily. Have you ever been pressured to harness your 1000/60/60/24/7/365, magnetic feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a customized plan for dealing with emerging infomediaries? We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "users" really mean? We will revalue our capacity to generate without lessening our capability to maximize. Think proactive. We will increase our capability to exploit without lessening our capability to synergize. We will step up our capacity to cultivate without diminishing our power to streamline. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think synergistic. Think e-business. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Microsoft is the industry leader of robust, cross-platform, cutting-edge, client-focused C2C. Think killer. Think end-to-end. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you embrace intra-magnetically then you may also deliver dynamically. Imagine a combination of HTML and ActionScript. Think 24/7/365. It seems confused, but it's true! We will embrace the ability of revolutionary leading-edge, virally-distributed supply-chains to facilitate. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our M&A but our capability to engineer. What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to repurpose correctly.