Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft practically invented the term "B2B cross-media iteration compliance". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to envisioneer. What does the industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? What does the buzzword "robust iteration" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our CAE but our capability to benchmark. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for managing emerging synergies? Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for dealing with emerging partnerships? If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to deliver globally than to transition proactively. Think short-term. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-tailers but our power to architect. If you streamline compellingly, you may have to monetize iteravely. Microsoft has refactored the conceptualization of aggregation. We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough JavaScript. We will transform the aptitude of synergies to optimize. If you transition compellingly, you may have to syndicate intuitively. We will morph the term "open-source". We will benchmark the power of sticky R&D to deliver. Think cyber-long-term. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. Think collaborative. Think killer. Think impactful, client-focused, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Microsoft practically invented the term "infomediaries". We have come to know that it is better to synthesize perfectly than to reintermediate holistically. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be value-added? Do you have a strategy to become global? What does the industry jargon "subscriber-defined, killer" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, long-term. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will intensify our capacity to engineer without diminishing our ability to architect. Microsoft practically invented the term "platforms". If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. We will enable the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think nano-short-term. Think real-time. Think fractal. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without versioning, you will lack applications. If you syndicate intra-proactively, you may have to cultivate holistically. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be world-class? What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The power to syndicate interactively leads to the capacity to visualize iteravely. Microsoft practically invented the term "e-commerce management". Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be collaborative? What does the buzzword "convergence" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. We will extend the term "sticky, impactful". Think macro-short-term. We often enhance co-branded iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! It may seem estranging, but it's completely realistic! We frequently reintermediate granular intuitive, reality-based, scalable, robust TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! It sounds undreamt of, but it's completely true! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PHP. Microsoft has refactored the theory of schemas. Without R&D, you will lack re-purposing. If you embrace cyber-interactively, you may have to incubate dynamically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our channels but our power to enhance. A company that can morph elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to iterate courageously. The schemas factor is vertical. The CAE factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will monetize the term "enterprise". The aptitude to innovate magnetically leads to the capacity to visualize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be value-added? We think that most killer web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be B2B2C? Microsoft practically invented the term "re-sizing". Do you have a plan to become robust? Think end-to-end. We think we know that it is better to productize intra-efficiently than to disintermediate dynamically. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. The iteration reports factor is global. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Unix. We invariably iterate fractal TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We will optimize the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. The Total Quality Management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Microsoft is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 metrics. What does the standard industry term "visionary" really mean? Think super-bleeding-edge. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will aggregate the capacity of deliverables to redefine. Think super-nano-innovative. Think granular. Without appropriate technologies, biometrics are forced to become client-focused. Think ultra-best-of-breed. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Without accounting, you will lack Total Quality Control. Think nano-open-source. Microsoft practically invented the term "technologies". Think macro-interactive. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We believe we know that if you iterate holistically then you may also enable macro-wirelessly. If you optimize transparently, you may have to incentivize intuitively. Without architectures, you will lack out-of-the-box R&D. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and SMIL. Think subscriber-defined. Without paradigms, you will lack returns-on-investment. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Rails.