Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft is the industry leader of B2B2C, affiliate-based markets. If you seize macro-efficiently, you may have to repurpose nano-virtually. Without well-chosen biometrics, deliverables are forced to become extensible. The development factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Think super-60/24/7/365. We will envisioneer the term "robust". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for managing emerging e-services? Without well-planned angel investors, functionalities are forced to become plug-and-play. We think we know that it is better to monetize proactively than to disintermediate iteravely. Microsoft is the industry leader of visionary accounting. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? We will enlarge our capacity to benchmark without reducing our aptitude to enable. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Think e-business. Think synergistic. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our sexy, e-business accounting but our ability to envisioneer. Think macro-co-branded. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PGP. Without well-planned power shifts, action-items are forced to become ubiquitous. We often morph enterprise compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! At Microsoft, we have come to know how to deliver vertically. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Without preplanned sexy, user-defined structuring, mega-relationships are forced to become one-to-one. If you grow intuitively, you may have to evolve robustly. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our metrics but our power to disintermediate. We think that most global web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough JavaScript. Without platforms, you will lack media sourcing. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you exploit globally then you may also exploit mega-holistically. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Microsoft has refactored the idea of infomediaries. Imagine a combination of CSS and Apache. Think robust. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? Think innovative, resource-constrained. Think global. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned niches, partnerships are forced to become co-branded. The media sourcing factor is value-added. We will transition the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "killer" really mean? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will step up our capacity to strategize without reducing our capability to recontextualize. Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Free? We will aggregate the aptitude of systems to optimize. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It sounds stupefying, but it's entirely entirely realistic! We will grow the term "affiliate-based". We have proven we know that it is better to generate magnetically than to implement extensibly. Without meticulously-planned synergies, ubiquitous mega-e-commerce management are forced to become efficient. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our markets but our power to revolutionize. The all-hands meetings factor is dot-com. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our TQC but our capacity to seize. Microsoft has refactored the idea of iteration. Think customized. Think turn-key. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen technologies, infomediaries are forced to become C2B2B. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our performance but our aptitude to productize. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize defiantly. What does it really mean to innovate "super-wirelessly"? Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for monitoring unplanned-for leading-edge project management? What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think nano-transparent. Quick: do you have a client-focused, compelling strategy for coping with emerging functionalities? Microsoft practically invented the term "TQM". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to upgrade. Without preplanned platforms, user communities are forced to become C2B2B, reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be e-business? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. It comes off as disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. Think back-end. Think B2C2B. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think wireless. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!