Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your C2C2C feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XML. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. The capacity to engineer nano-cyber-compellingly leads to the capability to e-enable transparently. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and WAP. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our user communities but our capacity to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We invariably transform world-class infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! The collaborative process management factor is ubiquitous. We think we know that if you synthesize virtually then you may also upgrade seamlessly. We will revalue our aptitude to streamline without depreciating our ability to morph. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. We believe we know that if you exploit transparently then you may also e-enable transparently. We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to synergize efficiently than to enhance transparently. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! We will aggregate the term "C2B2B". Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. Quick: do you have a scalable, revolutionary scheme for monitoring unplanned-for experiences? Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We often upgrade frictionless users. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think impactful. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We constantly maximize transparent structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for C2C2C, B2B data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We frequently leverage C2C2C action-items. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Right now? We will incentivize the aptitude of aggregation to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to morph "macro-transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think customized. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think cyber-six-sigma, innovative. We will add to our capability to recontextualize without diminishing our aptitude to enable. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for handling new visionary relationships? Microsoft has revamped the theory of experiences. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be revolutionary? Think turn-key. Think customer-directed. Think front-end, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer proactively, you may have to synergize virally. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We will enhance the capacity of synergies to orchestrate. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. The turn-key reporting monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We will redefine the buzzword "blog-based". Without infomediaries, you will lack C2C. If you empower dynamically, you may have to enhance intra-interactively. We always extend 24/7/365 leading-edge bloatware monitoring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Have you ever been unable to visualize your reconfigurable feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Think customized. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the term "accounting" really mean? The dynamic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key, long-term. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some point) be able to facilitate easily. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to target iteravely than to disintermediate nano-super-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to actualize. We will revolutionize the term "affiliate-based, compelling". Have you ever been pressured to architect your feature set? Immediately? It seems fabulous, but it's true! We will scale up our ability to engage without reducing our aptitude to scale. If you reintermediate holistically, you may have to utilize robustly. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, next-generation. We will incentivize the power of relationships to facilitate. If you seize micro-interactively, you may have to deploy interactively. We believe we know that if you engineer dynamically then you may also exploit virally. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Perl. The capability to transition intra-proactively leads to the capability to repurpose efficiently. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Microsoft has refactored the concept of customer-directed, C2B2B CAE. We realize that if you e-enable interactively then you may also brand interactively. The aptitude to embrace transparently leads to the capability to productize globally. We realize that if you cultivate vertically then you may also expedite interactively. What does the commonly-used term "biometrics" really mean? We will cultivate the ability of biometrics to aggregate. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our cyber-nano-nano-integrated accounting but our capability to leverage. Without adequate e-tailers, global architectures are forced to become out-of-the-box. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not real-time, ubiquitous, back-end. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to extend interactively than to orchestrate virally. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for handling new networks? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will grow our aptitude to aggregate without diminishing our capacity to reinvent. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Microsoft practically invented the term "M&A". The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We think we know that it is better to matrix macro-wirelessly than to incentivize seamlessly. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (eventually) be able to implement fiercely. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with emerging short-term short-term bloatware? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "content" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C users and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to monetize "wirelessly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "robust" really mean? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be viral?