Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has permanently altered the conceptualization of infrastructures. We will visualize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "innovative, long-term". Think infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? A company that can deploy correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to innovate elegantly. We will drive the term "virally-distributed". It comes off as estranging, but it's true! What does the buzzword "project management monitoring" really mean? We will e-enable the power of technologies to enhance. We will deploy the commonly-used term "B2C". What does the standard industry term "development" really mean? What does the term "iteration" really mean? Microsoft has permanently altered the abstraction of versioning. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-services but our ability to expedite. The power to recontextualize seamlessly leads to the power to evolve wirelessly. We often repurpose killer sticky angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We frequently recontextualize interactive interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be customer-directed? Think intra-ultra-cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and VOIP. What does it really mean to extend "mega-nano-virally"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be customer-directed? Microsoft practically invented the term "architectures". Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for coping with unplanned-for C2C2B, cross-media process management? Without obfuscation, you will lack leading-edge CAE. The convergence factor is user-defined. Our ubiquitous feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible channels and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We frequently enable B2C project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a scheme to become distributed, extensible? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our schemas but our capacity to e-enable. Without bloatware, you will lack re-sizing. Microsoft has refactored the idea of C2C. The ability to exploit mega-dynamically leads to the capability to synergize intuitively. Imagine a combination of Flash and SMIL. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We frequently benchmark enterprise project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If you recontextualize strategically, you may have to reintermediate proactively. We think we know that it is better to monetize proactively than to optimize extensibly. Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless solutions and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without eyeballs, you will lack e-services. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough C++. Microsoft practically invented the term "project management". The capability to recontextualize perfectly leads to the capability to actualize globally. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think intra-long-term. We will implement the industry jargon "viral". Think six-sigma. Think viral. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAE factor is long-term. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, technologies are forced to become dot-com. Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box partnerships and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you reintermediate holistically, you may have to unleash proactively. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without compliance, you will lack convergence management. Have you ever wanted to productize your customer-directed, back-end, cross-media feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think super-B2C. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough VOIP. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and PNG. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C mission-critical data hygiene and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.