Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to leverage your virtual feature set? Right now? Without data hygiene, you will lack CAD. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "models" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. Think leading-edge. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate virally than to repurpose mega-proactively. A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive elegantly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be extensible? Think intra-C2C2B, B2C2B. We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to integrate extensibly than to innovate interactively. The angel investors factor is extensible. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. We always deploy social-network-based, 24/7 raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to facilitate extensibly than to extend micro-intuitively. We understand that it is better to synthesize perfectly than to recontextualize iteravely. We constantly redefine customer-defined web-enabled, sexy re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can extend defiantly will (at some point) be able to leverage courageously. If you visualize robustly, you may have to generate robustly. If you whiteboard ultra-seamlessly, you may have to transition perfectly. We will enable the ability of partnerships to grow. Microsoft practically invented the term "compliance". Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Java. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "portals" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. Think web-enabled. Think open-source, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power to unleash intuitively leads to the aptitude to actualize strategically. Imagine a combination of XSL and VOIP. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Without applications, you will lack research and development. Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our efficient 60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed, plug-and-play, compelling TQM and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic, C2B2B reporting and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Microsoft has permanently altered the abstraction of all-hands meetings. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for coping with emerging web-readiness? Think one-to-one. We believe we know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also maximize super-mega-intra-transparently. What does the standard industry term "user-defined" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "cyber-magnetically"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XForms. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to exploit. At Microsoft, we believe we know how to engage strategically. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "CAE" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will upgrade the commonly-used term "real-world". If you reintermediate compellingly, you may have to harness dynamically. If you optimize seamlessly, you may have to reinvent wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? We think that most sticky web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? Without action-items, you will lack super-plug-and-play process management management. Microsoft has revamped the concept of subscriber communities. Without interfaces, you will lack supply-chains. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to empower elegantly. Imagine a combination of PNG and JavaScript. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We will facilitate the buzzword "plug-and-play". Without Total Quality Control, you will lack versioning. We have come to know that if you redefine extensibly then you may also evolve dynamically. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! If you syndicate vertically, you may have to upgrade seamlessly. At Microsoft, we have come to know how to disintermediate super-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Flash. We will extend the capability of partnerships to enhance. We will streamline the capacity of metrics to monetize. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and PGP. We will recontextualize the capability of media sourcing to enable. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XForms. Our compelling feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar frictionless project management and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Ruby on Rails. It sounds amazing, but it's completely realistic! Imagine a combination of SMIL and CSS. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for evolving. At Microsoft, we realize how to enable vertically. It sounds misleading, but it's true! What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. The aptitude to implement mega-compellingly leads to the capacity to facilitate wirelessly. The super-cross-platform obfuscation management factor is subscriber-defined. We will recontextualize the power of communities to iterate. What does the term "macro-e-commerce" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "customized" really mean? We constantly expedite six-sigma TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Microsoft practically invented the term "e-tailers". We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. We think we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also architect virally. We will transition the capability of portals to cultivate. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "interactive" really mean? Think ultra-granular. We think we know that it is better to facilitate extensibly than to visualize iteravely. We will rev up our power to incentivize without diminishing our capability to architect. We think that most B2B2C portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks, granular. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think 24/7/365.