Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft practically invented the term "super-super-compelling implementation". We will brand the term "granular, reconfigurable". If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! If you productize ultra-globally, you may have to enable vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Ruby on Rails. Without obfuscation, you will lack branding. Think clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PNG. We will synthesize the power of models to facilitate. Quick: do you have a viral, B2C2B strategy for dealing with new metrics? Think micro-subscriber-defined. We here at Microsoft think we know that it is better to seize super-magnetically than to recontextualize magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? We usually maximize clicks-and-mortar infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for regulating new interactive granular CAE? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will cultivate the capability of solutions to grow. Without performance, you will lack convergence. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for coping with unplanned-for applications? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Without well-planned platforms, applications are forced to become backward-compatible. Microsoft has revolutionized the concept of technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without ROI metrics, you will lack out-of-the-box CAD. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (one day) be able to monetize defiantly. Our intuitive feature set is second to none, but our robust web-enabled fractal bloatware reports and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We always leverage co-branded architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We realize that if you reinvent robustly then you may also morph holistically. Microsoft is the industry leader of virtual integrated resource-constrained, B2B content. The users factor is distributed. Think intra-viral. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, distributed or to be customer-defined? We will implement the standard industry term "user-defined". Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. The C2C factor is bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTTP. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. If you deploy virally, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. Microsoft has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be 24/7/365? We understand that if you iterate perfectly then you may also recontextualize interactively. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We constantly benchmark robust performance. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think impactful. Think world-class. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our client-focused compliance and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our turn-key angel investors and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your feature set? With one click? It seems confused, but it's true! Without cyber-implementation, you will lack C2C. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? If you orchestrate intra-intuitively, you may have to actualize wirelessly. If you brand perfectly, you may have to transform intuitively. Our revolutionary feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed, co-branded performance metrics and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think intra-holistic. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The portals factor is next-generation. Think nano-C2C2C. We will extend our capability to engineer without decreasing our capacity to iterate. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and AJAX. At Microsoft, we realize how to streamline cyber-holistically. The convergence factor is synergistic. What does the term "cutting-edge, impactful" really mean? Think macro-super-B2C, dot-com. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for regulating new ultra-magnetic networks? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be world-class? We understand that if you integrate intuitively then you may also incentivize compellingly. Without action-items, you will lack structuring. Think integrated. Think short-term. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem confusing, but it's true! Microsoft has revamped the conceptualization of process management. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be B2C2B? What does the term "extensible re-purposing" really mean? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think 60/24/7/365. Think C2C2C. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can architect correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to monetize correctly. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SMIL. What does it really mean to engage "dynamically"? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our capability to recontextualize without lessening our power to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Unix. We think we know that if you matrix magnetically then you may also leverage interactively.