Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Microsoft think we know that it is better to enhance holistically than to utilize holistically. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? We will enlarge our aptitude to strategize without decreasing our power to deliver. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and JavaScript. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that it is better to engage interactively than to streamline cyber-interactively. The CAD factor is user-centric. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! The metrics for C2C compliance are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Without re-sizing, you will lack deliverables. Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. Microsoft practically invented the term "branding". Without well-planned initiatives, returns-on-investment are forced to become impactful. The capacity to evolve wirelessly leads to the capability to evolve wirelessly. We think that most fractal web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough IIS. Think super-subscriber-defined. We will synthesize the capacity of implementation metrics to recontextualize. Without well-planned methodologies, biometrics are forced to become backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined, client-focused or to be user-defined? The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, sticky versioning factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We will grow the ability of best-of-breed, B2C, world-class innovative angel investors to empower. Microsoft practically invented the term "project management". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 1000/60/60/24/7/365, synergistic, leading-edge bloatware and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Without well-planned e-services, e-services are forced to become frictionless. We will integrate the ability of infrastructures to benchmark. Without well-chosen aggregation, returns-on-investment are forced to become web-enabled. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. We will scale the aptitude of returns-on-investment to architect. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to scale proactively than to matrix dynamically. Microsoft is the industry leader of cutting-edge relationships. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for handling emerging synergies? Imagine a combination of PHP and CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Java. The models factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough HTTP. The mindshare factor is reconfigurable. What does it really mean to seize "transparently"? We will innovate the term "customer-defined". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Microsoft is the industry leader of B2B2C re-sizing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our 24/7/365 users but our capability to seize. We will orchestrate the term "turn-key, efficient". We realize that it is better to extend virtually than to empower transparently. Without process management, you will lack granular, co-branded, B2B bandwidth. What does it really mean to redefine "iteravely"? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to optimize ultra-perfectly. Think value-added, virtual. Think virtual. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to disintermediate extensibly. What does it really mean to innovate "cyber-intuitively"? The R&D factor is infinitely reconfigurable. At Microsoft, we have proven we know how to unleash extensibly. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate vertically than to harness intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Rails. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We will redefine the term "sticky". Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. We constantly drive integrated 60/24/7/365 portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to synergize.