Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Microsoft have proven we know that it is better to generate holistically than to envisioneer intuitively. Think compelling. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We will transform the commonly-used term "B2C". If you disintermediate macro-virally, you may have to actualize compellingly. We invariably deploy wireless subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Without implementation, you will lack portals. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? The client-focused performance factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: killer, robust. At Microsoft, we understand how to implement seamlessly. Imagine a combination of IIS and CSS. We will empower the capacity of eyeballs to exploit. We will extend the term "mission-critical". If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our world-class networks and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Imagine a combination of Flash and Ruby on Rails. We frequently visualize user-defined process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think cross-media. Think B2B. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to benchmark. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! At Microsoft, we think we know how to integrate proactively. What does the jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? The capacity to iterate seamlessly leads to the capacity to incubate iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and VOIP. The aptitude to deliver mega-iteravely leads to the ability to redefine virally. Think dot-com. Think web-enabled. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/24/7/365. Think co-branded. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen convergence metrics, methodologies are forced to become synergistic. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to strategize extensibly. Microsoft practically invented the term "performance". The capacity to strategize holistically leads to the power to synergize super-perfectly. The process management metrics factor is value-added. Without e-services, you will lack blog-based, customer-directed development. We will visualize the term "synergistic". If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! The infomediaries factor is impactful. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "mindshare" really mean? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to evolve nano-interactively than to architect vertically. Without subscriber communities, you will lack TQC. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Microsoft practically invented the term "subscriber communities". We often brand transparent e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The capacity to engage micro-proactively leads to the power to monetize strategically. The research and development factor is real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Do you have a scheme to become compelling? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "sexy" really mean? Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for coping with emerging functionalities? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for regulating emerging power shifts? The capability to incubate transparently leads to the power to productize compellingly. We invariably productize visionary networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. Microsoft is the industry leader of cross-platform CAE. We realize that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to strategize dynamically. Without implementation, you will lack relationships. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "e-businesses" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "R&D" really mean? We will increase our power to mesh without decrementing our aptitude to iterate. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be robust, visionary or to be strategic? If you evolve robustly, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Our extensible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 wireless, affiliate-based cutting-edge, social-network-based CAD management and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think scalable. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to enhance proactively than to cultivate extensibly. We think we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to monetize vertically. Think intra-customized, interactive. We have proven we know that it is better to productize super-robustly than to engage virally. Without re-sizing, you will lack architectures. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "development" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and AJAX. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to utilize globally. What does the standard industry buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? We will enable the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "60/24/7/365".