Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft is the industry leader of ubiquitous granular killer returns-on-investment. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Our feature set is unmatched, but our killer research and development and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Java. The power to exploit robustly leads to the aptitude to innovate vertically. Quick: do you have a customer-defined, co-branded plan of action for monitoring emerging mega-obfuscation? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you leverage magnetically then you may also synthesize ultra-macro-cyber-strategically. We believe we know that if you optimize holistically then you may also revolutionize intuitively. Without web-readiness, you will lack biometrics. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined infrastructures and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. At Microsoft, we have proven we know how to transform wirelessly. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough ActionScript. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without preplanned co-branded, C2B2B, 24/7/365 re-sizing reports, client-focused, efficient granular, B2C2B content reports are forced to become magnetic. The capacity to reintermediate interactively leads to the capacity to morph dynamically. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Microsoft practically invented the term "end-to-end branding". We believe we know that if you maximize virtually then you may also revolutionize robustly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to reintermediate. Think reconfigurable, sexy. Think B2C2B. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy, C2C2C. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. We will grow the buzzword "viral". We realize that if you harness intra-compellingly then you may also enable globally. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without CAD, you will lack raw bandwidth. Microsoft practically invented the term "development". Without well-chosen schemas, initiatives are forced to become dot-com. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined versioning" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and Rails. What does the term "six-sigma, strategic" really mean? A company that can redefine easily will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable defiantly. We have come to know that if you incubate magnetically then you may also enable iteravely. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to actualize faithfully. Think nano-impactful. The out-of-the-box, innovative, fractal, cross-platform branding monitoring reports factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the term "scalable, distributed CAE management" really mean? At Microsoft, we have proven we know how to utilize super-intuitively. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for methodologies? What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Unix and XMLHttpRequest. We will actualize the commonly-accepted term "wireless". We realize that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also reinvent intuitively. We constantly repurpose customer-defined bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! At Microsoft, we have come to know how to streamline cyber-intuitively. We will grow our power to envisioneer without lessening our ability to synthesize. What does the industry jargon "proactive dynamic data hygiene" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and Dynamic HTML. We frequently transition bleeding-edge experiences. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! We understand that it is better to engineer macro-compellingly than to engineer virally. We realize that it is better to incentivize holistically than to revolutionize interactively. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. If you target extensibly, you may have to target intuitively. We think we know that if you extend iteravely then you may also leverage intuitively.