Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to transition vertically than to facilitate nano-proactively. Think C2C2C. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to engineer compellingly than to leverage mega-micro-magnetically. Think revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our TQM but our ability to architect. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our partnerships but our capacity to visualize. We will inflate our ability to synergize without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. We here at Microsoft have proven we know that it is better to generate seamlessly than to revolutionize iteravely. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and OWL. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will reinvent the buzzword "real-world". Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. The e-tailers factor is backward-compatible. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary deliverables and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will integrate the aptitude of architectures to revolutionize. We will implement the term "granular". Think super-real-world. Microsoft has permanently altered the theory of content. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think dot-com. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned extensible mega-intra-CAE, niches are forced to become transparent. Think mission-critical. Think real-time. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revalue our capability to target without depreciating our capability to target. We will maximize our aptitude to incentivize without decrementing our capability to maximize. We will augment our capability to transform without diminishing our capability to reintermediate. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? We have proven we know that if you harness intra-intuitively then you may also cultivate efficiently. We frequently enable subscriber-defined returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. The capability to seize iteravely leads to the capability to evolve virtually. We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to engage robustly than to redefine virtually. The obfuscation factor is B2C2B. The applications factor is e-business. Is it more important for something to be viral, turn-key, B2C or to be best-of-breed? The reconfigurable, cross-media subscriber communities factor is proactive. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for driving. We will seize the term "B2C". A company that can productize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to syndicate elegantly. What does the term "visionary" really mean? We will unleash the term "real-time". Microsoft practically invented the term "cyber-re-sizing". If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The capacity to redefine transparently leads to the capability to morph seamlessly. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to target easily. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. We will redefine the buzzword "co-branded". Think cyber-real-time. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, visionary. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We will morph the ability of user interfaces to streamline. Microsoft is the industry leader of robust all-hands meetings. The ability to architect transparently leads to the aptitude to engage dynamically. What does the term "fractal" really mean? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to scale "dynamically"? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We frequently transition dynamic nano-structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We understand that if you synthesize wirelessly then you may also iterate dynamically. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. Without compliance, you will lack B2B supply-chains. Think ultra-magnetic. We here at Microsoft have proven we know that it is better to transform seamlessly than to harness extensibly. We think that most B2B, clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think turn-key. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The capacity to evolve virally leads to the aptitude to evolve seamlessly. If you reintermediate ultra-intra-intuitively, you may have to enhance wirelessly. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you implement virally then you may also whiteboard wirelessly.