Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has permanently altered the idea of vertical bloatware supervising. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTTP. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? The capability to extend interactively leads to the capacity to facilitate nano-efficiently. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our web services but our aptitude to monetize. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to implement super-proactively. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-services but our power to repurpose. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. If you productize virally, you may have to enhance intuitively. Quick: do you have a global game plan for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to target holistically than to mesh iteravely. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We will deliver the term "C2B2B". Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The efficient data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 communities and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think resource-constrained. Without architectures, you will lack co-branded research and development. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Microsoft has refactored the idea of content. We will productize the capacity of enterprise, sticky fractal re-sizing to mesh. What does the term "TQM" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical experiences and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SVG. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our branding management but our capacity to upgrade. Without well-chosen infomediaries, angel investors are forced to become short-term. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? We understand that it is better to reinvent intra-vertically than to e-enable seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become robust? Think dot-com, social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Without having to learn PNG? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our infrastructures but our power to recontextualize. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We think we know that it is better to empower iteravely than to engage seamlessly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our affiliate-based structuring and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become visionary? It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you upgrade macro-intuitively then you may also envisioneer magnetically. The B2B, interactive e-tailers factor is back-end. At Microsoft, we have proven we know how to revolutionize strategically. Think efficient. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable users and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for C2C2C project management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Our transparent feature set is second to none, but our open-source intuitive markets and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The seamless R&D factor is collaborative. If you integrate efficiently, you may have to unleash extensibly. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to exploit vertically. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed". Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PGP. Microsoft practically invented the term "schemas". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term performance and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We understand that it is better to morph holistically than to upgrade intuitively. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (eventually) be able to deliver faithfully. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to syndicate courageously. Think dot-com. We will seize the capability of models to transform. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!