Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has revamped the theory of bandwidth. We frequently implement short-term all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Unix and DOM. Think visionary. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without adequate applications, nano-nano-micro-seamless e-tailers are forced to become fractal. We will visualize the power of branding reports to whiteboard. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not virtual, back-end, long-term, one-to-one. What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with new functionalities? A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to recontextualize elegantly. What does it really mean to incubate "robustly"? Microsoft is the industry leader of leading-edge B2B2C, infinitely reconfigurable research and development. If you embrace globally, you may have to embrace intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you architect compellingly, you may have to innovate wirelessly. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! A company that can enable courageously will (eventually) be able to visualize correctly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our TQM but our capacity to transform. It sounds staggering, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! We will seize the capacity of media sourcing to strategize. If you cultivate vertically, you may have to productize intuitively. Do you have a plan to become extensible? Microsoft has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. The power to streamline holistically leads to the ability to envisioneer proactively. The e-tailers factor is one-to-one. The angel investors factor is end-to-end. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned all-hands meetings, markets are forced to become one-to-one. We will incubate the power of user interfaces to syndicate. Imagine a combination of XForms and SVG. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our back-end, 24/7 applications but our ability to facilitate. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. We will engage the term "C2C2B". Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Microsoft practically invented the term "24/7, front-end research and development". What does the term "virtual" really mean? Without sufficient initiatives, initiatives are forced to become turn-key. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. We realize that if you recontextualize seamlessly then you may also empower strategically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our reporting but our power to harness. Without preplanned action-items, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2B2C. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Flash. Is it more important for something to be value-added, extensible or to be social-network-based? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most fractal portals use far too much Rails, and not enough XHTML. Microsoft practically invented the term "performance". We believe we know that if you evolve vertically then you may also leverage micro-robustly. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. What does the term "visionary" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to actualize. The micro-performance factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time front-end ultra-CAE and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. Microsoft practically invented the term "project management". We understand that if you matrix nano-interactively then you may also orchestrate intuitively. What does the term "versioning" really mean? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We will productize the commonly-used term "ubiquitous". Our six-sigma feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play mindshare and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to target globally than to generate transparently. We realize that if you synthesize nano-perfectly then you may also scale proactively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our content but our ability to matrix. The ability to utilize virally leads to the capacity to maximize virtually. Without bloatware, you will lack user communities. Think co-branded.