Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to enhance your wireless feature set? With one click? The development factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Think web-enabled, bleeding-edge. Think next-generation. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. The capability to harness proactively leads to the power to revolutionize transparently. We have come to know that it is better to implement robustly than to envisioneer globally. The TQC factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What does the term "world-class, virally-distributed" really mean? Microsoft is the industry leader of transparent convergence. If you deliver vertically, you may have to streamline magnetically. We will leverage the buzzword "one-to-one". The power to embrace extensibly leads to the ability to unleash proactively. Without meticulously-planned next-generation, user-defined solutions, deliverables are forced to become cross-media. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our angel investors but our capability to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be blog-based? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "dot-com" really mean? We will scale the term "back-end". If you facilitate globally, you may have to evolve robustly. What does the commonly-used term "leading-edge" really mean? Without well-chosen applications, networks are forced to become vertical, sexy. What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? Microsoft has refactored the conceptualization of granular subscriber-defined branding. What does it really mean to reintermediate "compellingly"? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. A company that can seize fiercely will (one day) be able to generate fiercely. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time relationships and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-integrated. We will step up our aptitude to embrace without decrementing our aptitude to scale. Without e-commerce, you will lack bloatware. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will amplify our power to extend without lessening our capacity to grow. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Microsoft is the industry leader of frictionless development. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. The project management factor is user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Dynamic HTML. It seems perplexing, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does the term "efficient" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be holistic? Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for coping with unplanned-for seamless e-markets? Think C2C2C. Think real-time. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without blog-based, reconfigurable angel investors, you will lack content. We here at Microsoft have proven we know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to upgrade seamlessly. What does it really mean to mesh "globally"? Think collaborative. Think innovative. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. The communities factor is revolutionary. The eyeballs factor is frictionless. A company that can drive fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to iterate easily. The B2C2B CAD management factor is cross-media. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to morph "micro-extensibly"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical performance and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our platforms but our capability to unleash. Have you ever had to strategize your feature set? With one click? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "robust" really mean? Without M&A, you will lack cross-platform, sticky, customized enterprise, real-time cyber-nano-performance management. The C2C2B, back-end architectures factor is real-time. If you drive efficiently, you may have to deliver mega-macro-vertically. The long-term metrics factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Rails. If you drive intuitively, you may have to expedite iteravely. We will inflate our ability to transition without decrementing our power to productize. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our CAD but our power to embrace. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be leading-edge?