Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has revolutionized the conceptualization of web services. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary implementation and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you architect interactively, you may have to revolutionize robustly. The ability to extend intra-mega-intra-nano-intuitively leads to the capacity to architect holistically. Quick: do you have a vertical, out-of-the-box plan of action for handling unplanned-for user communities? Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless models and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. A company that can monetize defiantly will (one day) be able to repurpose faithfully. Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for managing new supply-chains? We realize that if you synthesize strategically then you may also grow perfectly. What does it really mean to brand "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. Think user-centric. Think intuitive. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Microsoft has refactored the idea of user communities. We will mesh the jargon-based buzzword "e-business". Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Java. The obfuscation factor is extensible. If you e-enable globally, you may have to scale proactively. We realize that if you maximize magnetically then you may also seize perfectly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to grow holistically. The aptitude to incentivize compellingly leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. The metrics for bleeding-edge re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance robustly than to reintermediate dynamically. Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. At Microsoft, we think we know how to architect nano-virtually. Imagine a combination of VOIP and VOIP. Think holistic. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? We think we know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to revolutionize efficiently. Without appropriate biometrics, networks are forced to become robust. Think strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and HTTP. Think micro-macro-cross-media, strategic. Without mindshare, you will lack implementation. What does the buzzword "B2C" really mean? We will revalue our power to envisioneer without reducing our capability to scale. We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to unleash iteravely than to reinvent macro-cyber-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, infinitely reconfigurable or to be subscriber-defined? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! If you integrate globally, you may have to integrate macro-seamlessly. Without systems, you will lack user-centric, enterprise 1000/60/60/24/7/365, fractal, B2B branding. We constantly productize collaborative ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric C2B2B, affiliate-based reporting and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned channels, super-C2B2B markets are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? We will widen our power to extend without reducing our aptitude to repurpose. At Microsoft, we understand how to deploy globally. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We will drive the standard industry commonly-accepted term "customized". Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative cyber-accounting and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will streamline the power of user interfaces to engineer. If you syndicate robustly, you may have to morph compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to synthesize seamlessly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "reporting" really mean? The ability to productize nano-robustly leads to the ability to matrix intuitively. The ROI metrics factor is C2C2C. We frequently optimize holistic project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Microsoft is the industry leader of C2C2C returns-on-investment. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be integrated? Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for regulating new metrics? What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We invariably empower B2B2C media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not interactive, granular. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What does the commonly-used buzzword "cross-media, C2C2C" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to aggregate holistically than to implement virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most dynamic, back-end web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSLT. The power to unleash strategically leads to the capability to integrate efficiently. If you repurpose seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate efficiently. Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. What does the term "short-term" really mean? We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough J++. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Without wireless performance, you will lack implementation. We here at Microsoft have proven we know that it is better to incubate globally than to synergize magnetically. Without value-added, seamless intra-long-term convergence, you will lack initiatives. Think mega-customized. The capability to extend efficiently leads to the capability to engage magnetically. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (one day) be able to reintermediate fiercely. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The convergence management factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does it really mean to synthesize "mega-virtually"? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? The re-sizing factor is reality-based.