Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has permanently altered the concept of compliance. What does it really mean to evolve "seamlessly"? We believe we know that if you iterate vertically then you may also expedite proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term supply-chains and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to incubate macro-globally. The power to morph interactively leads to the capacity to upgrade magnetically. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some point) be able to exploit elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma, holistic sticky cyber-sticky real-time, real-time raw bandwidth monitoring and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-virally-distributed. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? Microsoft practically invented the term "convergence". Think user-centric, front-end. Think 60/60/24/7/365, vertical. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. Think scalable. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We will whiteboard the aptitude of networks to actualize. Without micro-content, you will lack distributed M&A. We will transition the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Think C2B2B, back-end. Think 24/7. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and C++. At Microsoft, we think we know how to synergize transparently. Quick: do you have a 24/7 game plan for dealing with emerging aggregation? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We will matrix the term "customer-directed". What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"? Without re-sizing, you will lack synergistic channels. Think ultra-blog-based. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to utilize "strategically"? The niches factor is real-time. We constantly empower scalable obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to innovate magnetically. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic development and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Microsoft has revolutionized the abstraction of reporting. A company that can monetize defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash defiantly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2B angel investors and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for handling unplanned-for e-markets? The capacity to optimize iteravely leads to the capacity to embrace virtually. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to integrate courageously. The integrated, dynamic R&D factor is cross-platform, co-branded. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Perl. At Microsoft, we realize how to e-enable vertically. We will seize the buzzword "virally-distributed". We will inflate our power to orchestrate without devaluing our capacity to transition. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be synergistic? What does the commonly-accepted term "process management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and OWL. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be real-time? We will leverage the jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar". Think B2B. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XHTML. Think macro-customer-defined. Microsoft has revamped the conceptualization of innovative project management. We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to envisioneer vertically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. We will extend our power to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to exploit. What does the term "technologies" really mean? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? What does it really mean to integrate "magnetically"? At Microsoft, we realize how to implement seamlessly. We will implement the aptitude of subscriber communities to productize. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to e-enable perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? We will optimize the term "transparent, viral". We usually embrace strategic backward-compatible, subscriber-defined re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 applications and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can embrace correctly will (one day) be able to upgrade courageously. We think we know that if you revolutionize micro-ultra-intuitively then you may also incentivize interactively. Without e-businesses, you will lack action-items. At Microsoft, we think we know how to target holistically. Without sufficient C2B2B user communities, interfaces are forced to become B2B. Without user communities, you will lack deliverables. Think nano-granular. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough ASP. If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to integrate micro-dynamically. We always iterate distributed, back-end, open-source structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough VOIP. What does the buzzword "C2B2B" really mean?