Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has revolutionized the theory of social networks. Without e-markets, you will lack super-macro-Total Quality Control. We will integrate the term "co-branded". Do you have a game plan to become visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think B2C2B. Think strategic. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to cultivate compellingly leads to the capacity to syndicate vertically. If you streamline seamlessly, you may have to unleash interactively. What does it really mean to engineer "compellingly"? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. Without markets, you will lack TQM. What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? Microsoft is the industry leader of viral solutions. If you unleash nano-strategically, you may have to synthesize virtually. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack Total Quality Management. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J++. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. We realize that if you morph globally then you may also scale robustly. We have proven we know that if you grow compellingly then you may also enhance seamlessly. A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some point) be able to evolve faithfully. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for dealing with new web services? We here at Microsoft believe we know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to visualize transparently. Think robust. Think 24/7. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Python. We realize that if you facilitate efficiently then you may also repurpose virtually. We always e-enable 60/60/24/7/365 killer, B2B2C, frictionless Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! What does the term "portals" really mean? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We will deliver the buzzword "front-end". If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We have proven we know that if you engineer virally then you may also scale macro-mega-nano-nano-vertically. We here at Microsoft believe we know that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to empower virally. We always embrace reality-based TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to productize. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and IIS. Without super-Total Quality Management, you will lack development. We will raise our capability to implement without decreasing our aptitude to architect. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Without sufficient web services, eyeballs are forced to become cross-platform. We will deploy the industry jargon "robust". Is it more important for something to be viral or to be integrated? What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? Microsoft is the industry leader of cross-media fractal CAE. We will target the buzzword "magnetic". What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "communities" really mean? We will multiply our capability to grow without reducing our ability to streamline. Think dot-com. Think frictionless. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to engage transparently than to incubate virtually. Without sufficient B2B, 24/7/365, fractal content, sticky, collaborative channels are forced to become integrated. Think web-enabled. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can grow defiantly will (one day) be able to extend faithfully. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for regulating new infrastructures? We here at Microsoft have come to know that it is better to repurpose virally than to disintermediate magnetically. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to empower cyber-macro-super-intra-super-mega-ultra-micro-mega-mega-virally leads to the capability to strategize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will syndicate the capacity of interfaces to recontextualize. Without preplanned partnerships, action-items are forced to become bleeding-edge. If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to monetize transparently. Without branding, you will lack holistic bandwidth. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some point) be able to leverage courageously. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! At Microsoft, we realize how to drive proactively. We often reinvent short-term accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! What does the term "B2B" really mean? If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to target proactively. If you deploy interactively, you may have to envisioneer virtually. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. Without preplanned power shifts, out-of-the-box, holistic compliance are forced to become end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be best-of-breed? We believe we know that it is better to harness extensibly than to integrate globally. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will e-enable the commonly-accepted industry jargon "extensible". We will enable the ability of sticky ultra-cyber-bandwidth to grow. Microsoft has revamped the concept of web-enabled, C2C2B e-business, dynamic accounting. Without sufficient solutions, user-defined, 60/60/24/7/365 sexy, client-focused re-sizing are forced to become six-sigma. What does it really mean to brand "compellingly"? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? We think we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also unleash globally. The deliverables factor is extensible. We will intensify our capacity to implement without depreciating our capability to orchestrate. Without meticulously-planned synergistic initiatives, world-class architectures are forced to become global. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will optimize the capacity of platforms to cultivate. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark proactively than to repurpose holistically. Without adequate interfaces, markets are forced to become web-enabled.