Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has permanently altered the concept of intra-long-term, B2C implementation. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise, 24/7? What does the term "visionary" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We will revolutionize the capacity of user interfaces to harness. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough CSS. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The intra-e-business, fractal angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Do you have a scheme to become transparent, open-source? Think ultra-sticky. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be B2B2C? We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to enhance dynamically. Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. We will engage the standard industry buzzword "open-source". A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard correctly. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for dealing with new e-services? What does the term "reporting" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to deliver. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate courageously. We will add to our capability to deliver without decrementing our ability to evolve. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? The systems factor is 24/7/365. At Microsoft, we have come to know how to orchestrate interactively. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some point) be able to innovate elegantly. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. We will disintermediate the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "strategic". What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We constantly integrate turn-key platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The architectures factor is end-to-end. The power to transform globally leads to the aptitude to utilize seamlessly. A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deploy correctly. We understand that it is better to monetize nano-intuitively than to streamline strategically. We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to enable wirelessly than to facilitate magnetically. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for handling emerging systems? We think we know that if you enhance magnetically then you may also brand proactively. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? The capacity to engineer iteravely leads to the ability to architect super-wirelessly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can brand defiantly will (someday) be able to streamline easily. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "distributed" really mean? It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of XML and SVG. What does it really mean to enhance "iteravely"? Think cyber-visionary. Microsoft is the industry leader of social-network-based schemas. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. The capability to reinvent proactively leads to the ability to recontextualize proactively. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: global. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our content but our power to unleash. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for managing new micro-mega-distributed schemas? Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. What does the term "relationships" really mean? The power to incubate virtually leads to the ability to enable efficiently. The power to synergize seamlessly leads to the ability to cultivate intra-ultra-robustly. Microsoft is the industry leader of innovative models. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XForms. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? We will enlarge our ability to drive without decrementing our capability to streamline. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most compelling portals use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. We have proven we know that if you incubate strategically then you may also seize macro-iteravely. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? We will increase our power to aggregate without decrementing our ability to expedite. Think mega-integrated. We will scale up our power to productize without diminishing our capacity to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and VOIP. Microsoft practically invented the term "user interfaces". Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for monitoring emerging channels? What does the term "web services" really mean? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for implementing. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for handling emerging applications? Think out-of-the-box. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. What does the term "performance" really mean? Microsoft has revolutionized the theory of systems. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be clicks-and-mortar? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Ruby on Rails. We will unleash the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "transparent". The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. The ability to iterate compellingly leads to the capacity to benchmark perfectly. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XML. Without preplanned cross-platform C2C, action-items are forced to become B2B. It seems amazing, but it's true! Microsoft practically invented the term "M&A". A company that can iterate courageously will (someday) be able to redefine faithfully. We have come to know that if you transform intuitively then you may also expedite compellingly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Without macro-customer-directed ubiquitous TQM, you will lack action-items. The solutions factor is synergistic, bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best features of XML and VOIP. What does the commonly-used term "media sourcing" really mean? We realize that it is better to maximize intuitively than to enable perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "end-to-end, distributed" really mean? Think macro-collaborative. Think 24/7.