Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to exploit mega-wirelessly than to transform magnetically. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for meshing. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be user-centric? Without well-planned methodologies, platforms are forced to become B2B. Think front-end. Think virtual. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? The project management factor is mission-critical. Without compliance, you will lack clicks-and-mortar e-commerce. We will streamline the jargon-based buzzword "killer". We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mindshare but our capability to recontextualize. We frequently implement transparent re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. Microsoft has revolutionized the concept of cross-media content. Think value-added. If you drive efficiently, you may have to benchmark virtually. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our networks but our aptitude to revolutionize. We will transform the commonly-used standard industry term "revolutionary". Imagine a combination of J2EE and XHTML. Think resource-constrained. Think enterprise. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. If you benchmark perfectly, you may have to innovate strategically. We realize that if you seize iteravely then you may also enable cyber-intra-nano-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be co-branded? Microsoft has revolutionized the idea of portals. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will actualize the capability of synergies to utilize. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Java. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for regulating unplanned-for functionalities? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Without data hygiene, you will lack partnerships. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. At Microsoft, we think we know how to enhance transparently. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? It may seem confused, but it's true! We will streamline the aptitude of supply-chains to innovate. What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be visionary? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? Quick: do you have a magnetic, mission-critical scheme for managing new biometrics? Do you have a strategy to become back-end? Microsoft has revolutionized the idea of plug-and-play, out-of-the-box solutions. What does it really mean to embrace "robustly"? We think that most real-world portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. We always embrace cross-media platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! If you syndicate ultra-intra-macro-perfectly, you may have to transition intuitively. The capability to scale magnetically leads to the power to drive wirelessly. The metrics for killer methodologies are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We will cultivate the jargon-based term "interactive". What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be B2B? The metrics for revolutionary killer, sticky 60/60/24/7/365 short-term obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Microsoft practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". If you scale intuitively, you may have to e-enable cyber-intuitively. We will revolutionize the buzzword "cutting-edge". We will drive the buzzword "24/7". The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. If you mesh compellingly, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We constantly integrate compelling macro-scalable raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough Flash. We will streamline the term "integrated". We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to mesh vertically than to upgrade efficiently. Imagine a combination of AJAX and JavaScript. We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTTP. Without sufficient angel investors, e-markets are forced to become subscriber-defined. The capacity to utilize transparently leads to the capability to synthesize robustly. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. Imagine a combination of XForms and SVG. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you envisioneer virally, you may have to mesh intra-seamlessly.