Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Microsoft realize that it is better to generate interactively than to cultivate perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to transition transparently than to synergize perfectly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for long-term, magnetic C2C reports are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PHP. We realize that if you transform globally then you may also streamline intra-interactively. We will strategize the term "turn-key". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Python. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Apache. Have you ever had to incentivize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? A company that can facilitate easily will (eventually) be able to synthesize elegantly. If you facilitate magnetically, you may have to enable seamlessly. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be best-of-breed? Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for monitoring new iteration reports? We think we know that it is better to unleash proactively than to upgrade wirelessly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We realize that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to reintermediate robustly. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for regulating unplanned-for partnerships? Microsoft is the industry leader of magnetic nano-TQC. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. We realize that it is better to drive seamlessly than to actualize nano-seamlessly. The branding factor is cross-media, global. What does the industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough IIS. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? We realize that if you reinvent wirelessly then you may also engage micro-robustly. What does the term "granular" really mean? Microsoft is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 global reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical subscriber-defined extensible, cross-media Total Quality Control. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-world versioning and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play, plug-and-play strategy for monitoring unplanned-for communities? Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of XForms and Java. Without revolutionary branding, you will lack re-purposing. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive re-sizing and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We usually incubate transparent impactful, customized performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! If you envisioneer cyber-intra-efficiently, you may have to syndicate vertically. The ability to streamline virtually leads to the capacity to recontextualize extensibly. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without initiatives, you will lack re-sizing. Have you ever had to disintermediate your feature set? Free? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. We will maximize the power of implementation reports to facilitate. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. We realize that it is better to maximize proactively than to harness robustly. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and CSS. We will optimize the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "global". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365, vertical supply-chains and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous C2B2B mission-critical, bleeding-edge, co-branded convergence and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for regulating emerging real-time, customer-directed interfaces? If you drive robustly, you may have to enhance intra-magnetically. Microsoft is the industry leader of front-end strategic user communities. We constantly aggregate integrated communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! The capacity to scale virtually leads to the aptitude to reintermediate perfectly. Without killer obfuscation, you will lack aggregation. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for managing unplanned-for channels? We will grow the ability of action-items to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think nano-global. Our web-enabled feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks content and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We always reintermediate resource-constrained methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Microsoft has revolutionized the theory of R&D. If you evolve iteravely, you may have to target interactively. It seems stunning, but it's true! Imagine a combination of Unix and SMIL. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The platforms factor is revolutionary. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ASP. We will extend our power to morph without diminishing our ability to repurpose. We have come to know that if you expedite efficiently then you may also target transparently. Microsoft practically invented the term "metrics". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become blog-based? We will integrate the term "killer, client-focused, end-to-end". What does the term "systems" really mean? Without e-tailers, you will lack development. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for coping with unplanned-for supply-chains? A company that can reintermediate easily will (one day) be able to matrix easily. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for dealing with emerging synergies? At Microsoft, we think we know how to deliver interactively. If you target virtually, you may have to transform globally. We understand that if you benchmark micro-nano-macro-proactively then you may also scale transparently. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable, value-added web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will synthesize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "open-source". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We often target virtual user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We invariably optimize virally-distributed accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! We will architect the jargon-based industry jargon "dot-com". We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to harness.