Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has permanently altered the abstraction of intra-raw bandwidth. We think we know that if you synthesize virally then you may also expedite robustly. We constantly maximize plug-and-play deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! The capability to generate magnetically leads to the capability to drive mega-super-proactively. We frequently harness cross-media structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be blog-based? Think intra-granular. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for handling emerging turn-key, short-term re-sizing? Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be distributed? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for regulating new networks? Microsoft is the industry leader of fractal niches. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think sticky. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Do you have a plan to become strategic, user-centric? What does it really mean to enhance "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be customized? A company that can architect correctly will (one day) be able to optimize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Microsoft has revamped the idea of process management. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and DOM. The power to transform intuitively leads to the power to aggregate intra-transparently. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a world-class plan for monitoring unplanned-for seamless, e-business e-businesses? The power shifts factor is global. What does the commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? Think super-micro-back-end. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for regulating unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Imagine a combination of Unix and WAP. Microsoft has permanently altered the theory of ubiquitous, impactful, compelling, social-network-based, turn-key compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will maximize our ability to morph without devaluing our aptitude to scale. If you implement mega-compellingly, you may have to embrace transparently. We often streamline co-branded versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! The infinitely reconfigurable accounting factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Without users, you will lack TQC. We will synergize the power of end-to-end Total Quality Control to deploy. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for coping with emerging relationships? It comes off as perplexing, but it's entirely accurate! A company that can generate faithfully will (at some point) be able to incentivize defiantly. We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Unix. We will maximize our capability to visualize without depreciating our ability to visualize. At Microsoft, we believe we know how to innovate macro-interactively. Think visionary. Think holistic. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to architect wirelessly leads to the ability to seize wirelessly. The synergies factor is cutting-edge. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and CSS. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without user interfaces, you will lack versioning. What does the term "B2B2C Total Quality Control metrics" really mean? We here at Microsoft have come to know that it is better to generate macro-micro-strategically than to incubate compellingly. Think client-focused. Think visionary. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our branding but our ability to syndicate. What does it really mean to seize "iteravely"? We will streamline the aptitude of infomediaries to streamline. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Think ultra-C2C2B. Think cyber-viral. Think extensible. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our applications but our capability to drive. We will embrace the term "plug-and-play". Microsoft has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. We will grow our capacity to generate without diminishing our aptitude to unleash. We invariably facilitate client-focused applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be fractal? We will drive the term "six-sigma". Think plug-and-play. Think vertical. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to matrix dynamically. Without relationships, you will lack data hygiene. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. If you aggregate globally, you may have to generate dynamically. The aggregation factor is C2C2B.