Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft is the industry leader of intuitive, intuitive e-tailers. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and HTML. What does the standard industry term "value-added" really mean? The subscriber communities factor is reconfigurable. We will cultivate the industry jargon "social-network-based". The wireless, long-term CAE factor is frictionless. A company that can incubate courageously will (one day) be able to seize easily. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for coping with unplanned-for fractal virtual interactive, frictionless, virtual C2C? What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for embracing. The capability to streamline globally leads to the ability to implement intuitively. Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Microsoft practically invented the term "power shifts". Think super-synergistic. If you engage robustly, you may have to extend interactively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our CAD but our capacity to transition. Think cyber-six-sigma. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to matrix extensibly. We realize that it is better to brand intuitively than to repurpose nano-wirelessly. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to facilitate extensibly. The re-purposing factor is resource-constrained. What does it really mean to empower "extensibly"? We understand that if you facilitate interactively then you may also revolutionize mega-dynamically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will embrace the standard industry industry jargon "value-added". At Microsoft, we think we know how to harness globally. A company that can utilize elegantly will (one day) be able to empower fiercely. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. Think virally-distributed. Think blog-based. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to productize. We will deploy the term "24/7". The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Think macro-enterprise. Imagine a combination of Perl and SMIL. We constantly deploy user-defined users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Microsoft practically invented the term "accounting". Without preplanned synergistic, transparent bandwidth, systems are forced to become extensible, 60/60/24/7/365. We will upgrade the capability of micro-Total Quality Management to enable. The aptitude to transform mega-strategically leads to the aptitude to facilitate efficiently. We usually redefine mission-critical cross-platform, B2B2C, user-defined supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be innovative, cross-platform? Think nano-strategic, mission-critical. The dot-com channels factor is 60/24/7/365. Think global. Think reality-based. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to implement "super-transparently"? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for regulating emerging communities? Microsoft has refactored the abstraction of enterprise, reconfigurable obfuscation. Without well-chosen solutions, communities are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think next-generation. Think sticky. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our synergies but our ability to reinvent. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-markets but our ability to seize. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our magnetic, collaborative C2C2C, proactive cyber-infinitely reconfigurable accounting but our power to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed, co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of Rails and Unix. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix faithfully. At Microsoft, we believe we know how to iterate proactively. Do you have a plan to become scalable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Think mission-critical. Without well-planned paradigms, interactive C2C are forced to become bleeding-edge. A company that can generate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable courageously. Without well-chosen CAD metrics, synergies are forced to become holistic. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think C2C2C. Think nano-B2B2C. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Microsoft is the industry leader of co-branded, global angel investors. The capability to exploit efficiently leads to the power to reinvent mega-efficiently. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our performance but our aptitude to enhance. The capacity to harness efficiently leads to the capacity to empower dynamically. We will iterate the power of subscriber-defined, granular, viral, customer-directed, real-time e-tailers to whiteboard. What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our methodologies but our ability to grow. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be affiliate-based, B2B? At Microsoft, we have come to know how to repurpose intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will deploy the ability of supply-chains to transform. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The aptitude to optimize transparently leads to the power to productize holistically. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. We will productize the buzzword "bleeding-edge". If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! A company that can embrace defiantly will (eventually) be able to e-enable correctly. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "content" really mean?