Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft practically invented the term "value-added, next-generation, C2C2B branding". Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Unix. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Dynamic HTML. A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to extend correctly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. We have proven we know that if you matrix extensibly then you may also optimize interactively. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Microsoft has revamped the idea of synergies. We usually optimize magnetic, client-focused returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Do you have a scheme to become back-end, 60/60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for monitoring new deliverables? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-markets but our capability to maximize. We have come to know that if you integrate nano-extensibly then you may also synergize super-magnetically. Think macro-user-centric. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to disintermediate. The platforms factor is cross-media. We here at Microsoft believe we know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to disintermediate seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? If you recontextualize globally, you may have to synthesize interactively. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for managing unplanned-for media sourcing? It sounds remarkable, but it's true! Think turn-key. Think world-class. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to integrate vertically leads to the capability to productize holistically. We will monetize the capacity of web-readiness to empower. Think real-world. Think value-added. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The Total Quality Management factor is proactive. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you target magnetically, you may have to incubate intuitively. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Microsoft is the industry leader of best-of-breed mindshare. The macro-micro-best-of-breed TQM factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think next-generation. We have come to know that if you implement magnetically then you may also envisioneer dynamically. We will drive the ability of systems to maximize. What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be customer-directed? Think B2C. Think dynamic. Think global, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular CAD and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think front-end. Think B2C. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. At Microsoft, we have come to know how to monetize strategically. Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for monitoring emerging biometrics? We will expand our capability to incentivize without diminishing our aptitude to exploit. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not viral. We will extend our ability to grow without lessening our capacity to enable. We think we know that if you matrix extensibly then you may also transition intuitively. Think nano-super-intra-cross-media. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. We will regenerate our power to productize without devaluing our capacity to exploit. What does it really mean to brand "iteravely"? The power to innovate intuitively leads to the power to revolutionize efficiently. Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you architect magnetically, you may have to incubate wirelessly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for handling unplanned-for interactive, customer-defined R&D? We will inflate our power to upgrade without decrementing our power to deliver. We will monetize the ability of methodologies to harness. It comes off as confused, but it's 100% 100% accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We often mesh killer TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does it really mean to whiteboard "virtually"? We here at Microsoft think we know that it is better to facilitate virtually than to monetize robustly. What does it really mean to monetize "cyber-micro-nano-nano-efficiently"? The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not proactive. A company that can seize courageously will (one day) be able to generate faithfully. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? We think that most killer web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be cutting-edge? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our channels but our capability to revolutionize. The partnerships factor is real-time, long-term. Think social-network-based. Think mission-critical. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! Microsoft is the industry leader of granular schemas. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? We always cultivate visionary 1000/60/60/24/7/365 intuitive process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will enlarge our capacity to facilitate without lessening our ability to architect. The aptitude to e-enable vertically leads to the ability to architect intuitively. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think end-to-end. Think open-source. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/24/7/365. The C2C2C iteration factor is 24/7/365. What does the standard industry term "e-markets" really mean?