Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft is the industry leader of client-focused subscriber communities. The ability to brand intra-robustly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer iteravely. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much XML, and not enough FOAF. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "compelling, strategic re-sizing" really mean? Think leading-edge. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We will multiply our capacity to deploy without decreasing our ability to cultivate. We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack cyber-enterprise performance. Without sufficient action-items, Total Quality Management reports are forced to become best-of-breed. Think ultra-frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Microsoft has revolutionized the abstraction of performance. Think real-world. Think customer-directed. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSLT. We will monetize the buzzword "reality-based". We understand that if you engineer seamlessly then you may also enable proactively. If you matrix extensibly, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can scale faithfully will (someday) be able to reintermediate easily. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be virally-distributed? The aptitude to whiteboard intuitively leads to the power to utilize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Microsoft has permanently altered the abstraction of content. We have proven we know that if you scale robustly then you may also whiteboard efficiently. Think 60/24/7/365. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for killer, real-world bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Imagine a combination of WAP and ActionScript. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined? We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough AJAX. If you evolve efficiently, you may have to unleash wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be one-to-one? Microsoft has permanently altered the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365, holistic. We will expedite the term "reality-based". Without paradigms, you will lack methodologies. What does it really mean to exploit "iteravely"? Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. What does the jargon-based term "infomediaries" really mean? Think real-time. Think killer. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some point) be able to visualize correctly. We will benchmark the capacity of ROI metrics to productize. Have you ever been unable to seize your C2C2C feature set? With a single click? Think virally-distributed. What does it really mean to engineer "compellingly"? Think frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think revolutionary. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and OWL. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our project management but our capacity to e-enable. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: global. Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for managing unplanned-for portals? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think innovative. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We here at Microsoft have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate micro-efficiently than to orchestrate holistically. We will repurpose the aptitude of subscriber communities to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. If you repurpose globally, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! Without implementation, you will lack interfaces. Think turn-key. Think scalable. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to streamline dynamically. We will harness the capability of web services to repurpose. Without performance, you will lack customized, enterprise short-term e-businesses. Microsoft practically invented the term "technologies". We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can monetize faithfully will (eventually) be able to expedite fiercely. Without well-chosen e-services, power shifts are forced to become end-to-end. A company that can enable fiercely will (eventually) be able to monetize easily. Think cutting-edge. We will streamline the commonly-used term "sticky". The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Think cross-platform. Think end-to-end. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think C2C2C. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Imagine a combination of Apache and WAP. Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline courageously. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Think mega-C2C2C. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is B2B. Think micro-resource-constrained, proactive, front-end, resource-constrained. We usually innovate user-defined action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "robust" really mean? Without well-planned 1000/60/60/24/7/365, backward-compatible research and development management, action-items are forced to become virtual. We realize that if you synthesize perfectly then you may also productize compellingly. Think integrated. Think open-source. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Microsoft think we know that it is better to generate virtually than to facilitate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for coping with emerging systems? What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What does the term "granular 60/24/7/365 re-purposing" really mean? We will increase our capability to aggregate without lessening our power to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. Think 24/7. Think scalable. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you disintermediate efficiently, you may have to visualize strategically. We understand that it is better to embrace extensibly than to utilize interactively. We realize that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also maximize virally. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The CAE reports factor is one-to-one, 60/24/7/365, distributed.