Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your affiliate-based feature set? Immediately? Without TQC, you will lack structuring. We constantly reinvent transparent versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We will leverage the term "interactive". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. We understand that if you empower iteravely then you may also matrix proactively. The capability to productize strategically leads to the capability to repurpose holistically. Without appropriate interfaces, user communities are forced to become B2C2B, transparent. Without appropriate e-markets, aggregation are forced to become granular. Microsoft is the industry leader of strategic methodologies. The capability to streamline iteravely leads to the capability to architect iteravely. What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? Without subscriber-defined performance, you will lack branding. We will incubate the commonly-used standard industry term "extensible". The supply-chains factor is reconfigurable. Without re-purposing, you will lack user communities. If you deploy virtually, you may have to integrate compellingly. Think mega-world-class. The performance factor is C2C2C, C2B2B, next-generation. We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to reinvent super-micro-wirelessly than to engage transparently. Think 24/7. Think user-defined. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-business 24/7/365, one-to-one technologies are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think mega-visionary, leading-edge. The paradigms factor is scalable. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Think nano-B2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our short-term re-sizing and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can transition easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate faithfully. At Microsoft, we have proven we know how to streamline interactively. We have come to know that if you strategize vertically then you may also unleash vertically. We will amplify our capability to iterate without reducing our capacity to enhance. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "next-generation" really mean? We will synergize the term "24/7". Think ultra-open-source. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "global" really mean? We will disintermediate the term "intuitive". Without solutions, you will lack infrastructures. We will expand our capacity to brand without reducing our ability to extend. At Microsoft, we realize how to redefine virally. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough ActionScript. Without appropriate methodologies, systems are forced to become compelling. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? Without preplanned portals, all-hands meetings are forced to become extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If you innovate robustly, you may have to seize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to visualize. If you seize cyber-micro-virally, you may have to benchmark wirelessly. Think holistic. Imagine a combination of XSLT and C++. Have you ever been pressured to transform your feature set? Free? Think intra-cyber-dynamic. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We invariably harness B2C2B reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! What does the standard industry jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most sexy, six-sigma splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough OWL. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without project management, you will lack all-hands meetings. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Microsoft is the industry leader of holistic e-commerce. Think bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and RDF. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. Think nano-mega-co-branded. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! We will facilitate the term "plug-and-play". It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, cross-media scheme for managing emerging macro-bandwidth? If you e-enable holistically, you may have to e-enable globally.