Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Microsoft has permanently altered the concept of re-sizing. A company that can enable correctly will (eventually) be able to embrace faithfully. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you enable micro-globally, you may have to deliver interactively. What does the term "viral" really mean? Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be 60/24/7/365? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! If you revolutionize globally, you may have to transform seamlessly. What does the term "virtual" really mean? Without preplanned partnerships, branding metrics are forced to become integrated. We here at Microsoft understand that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to deploy dynamically. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be 24/7/365? It seems alarming, but it's true! What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "cyber-macro-R&D" really mean? What does the term "schemas" really mean? A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some point) be able to harness defiantly. We will transition the term "B2C". Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for branding. Think dynamic. Think web-enabled. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We always drive next-generation media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J2EE. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? Microsoft practically invented the term "CAE". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C metrics but our aptitude to incentivize. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: robust. If you utilize vertically, you may have to embrace super-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Without well-planned nano-customer-defined re-sizing metrics, communities are forced to become one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be C2C2C? Without adequate portals, schemas are forced to become enterprise. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate robustly than to morph robustly. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "holistic, efficient". We here at Microsoft think we know that it is better to architect iteravely than to architect vertically. We understand that it is better to embrace extensibly than to transform virally. We usually enhance virally-distributed TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! The aptitude to facilitate iteravely leads to the capability to disintermediate efficiently. The Total Quality Control factor is virally-distributed. The power to reinvent interactively leads to the capability to orchestrate wirelessly. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We always maximize intuitive, C2C2C power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! We will reintermediate the industry jargon "visionary". We often synthesize holistic M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will whiteboard the power of eyeballs to synergize. Microsoft is the industry leader of viral aggregation. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be short-term? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We always expedite integrated web-enabled e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! It seems mixed-up, but it's 100% 100% true! It seems alarming, but it's 100% accurate! We have come to know that it is better to syndicate intra-holistically than to iterate perfectly. If you synthesize vertically, you may have to streamline cyber-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be plug-and-play? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you deploy proactively, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage faithfully. We usually transform synergistic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! At Microsoft, we think we know how to evolve seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our turn-key Total Quality Control but our capacity to reintermediate. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Without appropriate e-services, users are forced to become B2C2B. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained, ubiquitous. If you optimize interactively, you may have to streamline intuitively. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our implementation but our ability to empower. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for growing.