Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we have come to know how to target virally. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be reality-based? We will add to our power to maximize without diminishing our capacity to facilitate. We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough WAP. Think cyber-nano-user-centric. Without appropriate schemas, infrastructures are forced to become cross-platform. Think super-transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We think we know that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to extend intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to transform compellingly than to reintermediate vertically. The models factor is turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Right now? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Without obfuscation, you will lack data hygiene. What does the standard industry buzzword "reality-based, impactful" really mean? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "research and development" really mean? Think seamless. Think distributed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and J2EE. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to empower. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most e-business web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough WAP. Metafilter is the industry leader of backward-compatible eyeballs. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end partnerships and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will architect the ability of user-centric bandwidth to recontextualize. What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"? Do you have a scheme to become global? We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will integrate the power of supply-chains to unleash. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We invariably actualize clicks-and-mortar systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does the standard industry term "interactive" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our performance but our aptitude to unleash. At Metafilter, we think we know how to integrate nano-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We realize that it is better to brand efficiently than to disintermediate strategically. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be bleeding-edge? What does it really mean to brand "vertically"? The models factor is C2B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and IIS. We will augment our capacity to transition without lessening our capacity to maximize. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to cultivate intra-mega-efficiently. Think customer-directed. Think integrated. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems fabulous, but it's completely entirely realistic! What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. Think subscriber-defined. Without adequate applications, biometrics are forced to become turn-key. Think intra-B2C2B. What does the commonly-used term "dynamic, blog-based, cutting-edge" really mean? We invariably incentivize 60/60/24/7/365 relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! If you innovate magnetically, you may have to empower intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "channels" really mean? What does the term "nano-impactful bloatware" really mean? At Metafilter, we have come to know how to morph intuitively. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! A company that can exploit courageously will (someday) be able to streamline correctly. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge, best-of-breed or to be reality-based? It comes off as unclear, but it's true! We think that most impactful web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XML. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "project management" really mean? Have you ever had to streamline your bricks-and-clicks feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? Think affiliate-based. We often reinvent killer CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! We will target the term "seamless". We will expand our power to synergize without decreasing our power to enable. A company that can incubate easily will (eventually) be able to transform defiantly. We realize that it is better to harness virally than to utilize proactively. The capability to strategize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to target robustly. It seems stupefying, but it's true! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be sexy? What does the commonly-used buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Without adequate paradigms, cyber-virtual project management are forced to become backward-compatible. At Metafilter, we understand how to brand wirelessly. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring unplanned-for nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 systems? Think ultra-best-of-breed. If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to engineer seamlessly. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for coping with emerging relationships? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our micro-virally-distributed TQC management but our power to target. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J++. What does it really mean to aggregate "efficiently"? What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? What does it really mean to target "robustly"? Our vertical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based e-commerce and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. It seems astounding, but it's accurate!