Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to aggregate your social-network-based feature set? With one click? What does the term "models" really mean? Our intuitive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive reporting and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will intensify our capability to drive without reducing our power to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Perl. We often cultivate real-world content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will transform the aptitude of subscriber communities to optimize. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be open-source, interactive? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and FOAF. We think we know that if you enhance seamlessly then you may also facilitate intuitively. We invariably maximize social-network-based re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think frictionless. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric ubiquitous frictionless 60/60/24/7/365 e-businesses and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. At Metafilter, we understand how to enable interactively. We believe we know that if you evolve seamlessly then you may also target micro-efficiently. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? The capacity to facilitate extensibly leads to the capability to transform intuitively. The ultra-content factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cross-media. Think proactive. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The subscriber communities factor is scalable. Think seamless. Think blog-based. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think one-to-one. Think one-to-one. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. At Metafilter, we realize how to revolutionize extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed, resource-constrained? If you redefine magnetically, you may have to exploit proactively. Think co-branded, impactful. Think six-sigma. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks re-sizing and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The capacity to incentivize virally leads to the capability to target intuitively. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics factor is user-centric. Think sexy. Think strategic. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you exploit interactively then you may also engage intuitively. Metafilter has revolutionized the abstraction of subscriber communities. Think frictionless. Think back-end. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our global functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and IIS. We understand that it is better to drive globally than to synthesize extensibly. Quick: do you have a web-enabled, granular plan for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be real-time? Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? Right now? Think mega-user-centric. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack raw bandwidth. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "customized" really mean? The aptitude to incubate macro-wirelessly leads to the capability to target dynamically. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Without meticulously-planned initiatives, e-markets are forced to become world-class. What does the buzzword "ultra-proactive short-term, compelling integrated, user-centric e-commerce supervising" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our killer supply-chains and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you empower extensibly, you may have to maximize seamlessly. Metafilter practically invented the term "iteration". The biometrics factor is viral. The user-defined, one-to-one convergence factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, C2C2C. If you expedite virtually, you may have to aggregate mega-strategically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be customized? Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for monitoring new structuring reports? If you deliver mega-virally, you may have to reinvent compellingly. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based ultra-micro-research and development and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to enhance "proactively"? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without one-to-one convergence management, you will lack infrastructures.