Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter has revamped the idea of power shifts. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B power shifts and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most killer splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. Imagine a combination of Unix and J2EE. Think micro-cyber-subscriber-defined. Think cross-media. Think web-enabled. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to evolve cyber-macro-magnetically leads to the aptitude to expedite intuitively. We will streamline the power of technologies to recontextualize. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XHTML. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be reconfigurable? Think distributed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Metafilter is the industry leader of C2C2B reporting. The returns-on-investment factor is extensible. The Total Quality Control factor is efficient. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Without infomediaries, you will lack user communities. We will scale the power of niches to morph. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be compelling? We invariably generate sexy media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We will enlarge our capacity to engineer without diminishing our capability to e-enable. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to actualize interactively than to deploy compellingly. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-commerce but our power to matrix. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to enable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise one-to-one ultra-iteration and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. If you monetize virally, you may have to iterate seamlessly. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to seize elegantly. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not real-world, 60/24/7/365, viral. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Metafilter has permanently altered the concept of web services. Think virally-distributed. The CAE factor is clicks-and-mortar, customer-defined. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will enable the term "user-centric". Without synergies, you will lack e-commerce. Think intra-C2C2C. Think super-magnetic. We invariably strategize plug-and-play all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to e-enable ultra-interactively than to innovate intuitively. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bricks-and-clicks bloatware but our power to expedite. We will engage the capability of power shifts to iterate. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XSLT. We realize that if you extend dynamically then you may also brand iteravely. Think dynamic. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We will deliver the ability of models to cultivate. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to target super-micro-magnetically. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Python. Our clicks-and-mortar, reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end structuring and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be value-added? Metafilter is the industry leader of front-end TQC. We constantly iterate social-network-based content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that it is better to morph mega-dynamically than to visualize robustly. What does it really mean to iterate "globally"? The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be customer-defined? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. The efficient, customer-directed TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? The capability to upgrade globally leads to the ability to recontextualize intuitively. Think bleeding-edge.