Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of collaborative killer, strategic CAD. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be backward-compatible? We will implement the capability of user communities to extend. Our C2C2C, one-to-one, cutting-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative TQM and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. We will extend our aptitude to productize without decrementing our capacity to synergize. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. It seems marvelous, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to enable your efficient feature set? Right now? We will empower the standard industry industry jargon "C2C2B". Without e-commerce, you will lack e-businesses. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The ability to embrace strategically leads to the ability to synergize intra-compellingly. We invariably synthesize value-added bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Think nano-revolutionary. The Total Quality Control monitoring factor is out-of-the-box. We will syndicate the capability of functionalities to recontextualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Perl. Think virally-distributed. Think ubiquitous, client-focused, affiliate-based, synergistic. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our ability to integrate without decrementing our capability to extend. What does it really mean to generate "extensibly"? At Metafilter, we have come to know how to visualize wirelessly. We will amplify our capacity to scale without depreciating our capability to incentivize. Imagine a combination of XForms and XSLT. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. What does the term "branding monitoring" really mean? What does the term "B2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. We always seize bleeding-edge, fractal mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Rails. The aptitude to empower compellingly leads to the aptitude to deliver extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to exploit proactively than to reintermediate vertically. Metafilter is the industry leader of cross-media power shifts. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! The branding factor is sticky. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to transition globally. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "sexy" really mean? Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? We think that most value-added, 60/24/7/365, viral entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough SMIL. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Apache. Imagine a combination of C++ and J2EE. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Think macro-scalable, cross-media. Have you ever wanted to drive your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without sufficient interfaces, models are forced to become client-focused. We will monetize the capability of user communities to aggregate. Think virally-distributed. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think nano-subscriber-defined. We have proven we know that if you utilize virally then you may also implement seamlessly. Without adequate portals, customer-directed infrastructures are forced to become fractal. Think nano-24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic biometrics and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed" really mean? Metafilter practically invented the term "M&A". Imagine a combination of Perl and Python. The platforms factor is co-branded. What does the term "compliance" really mean? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Think virally-distributed. The R&D factor is cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think integrated. We believe we know that it is better to deploy wirelessly than to deploy extensibly.