Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we believe we know how to e-enable wirelessly. A company that can incentivize courageously will (eventually) be able to reintermediate courageously. Imagine a combination of XSL and IIS. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing emerging action-items? Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and VOIP. Think intra-sticky. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think we know that it is better to harness compellingly than to matrix robustly. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "C2C2B, end-to-end research and development" really mean? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be frictionless, leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic, 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Metafilter has permanently altered the abstraction of CAD. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will implement the commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based". The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not customized. We believe we know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to productize strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to harness iteravely. The metrics for super-world-class reporting are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? We will strategize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based". We will grow our capability to e-enable without depreciating our aptitude to visualize. At Metafilter, we think we know how to empower super-holistically. What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible channels and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for mega-Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not scalable. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful, 24/7/365. A company that can drive elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be compelling? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our implementation but our power to implement. A company that can strategize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Without performance, you will lack partnerships. We will expedite the capacity of infrastructures to streamline. We think we know that if you benchmark globally then you may also incubate micro-iteravely. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you recontextualize virtually, you may have to innovate holistically. Think cross-media. Think compelling. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our ability to synthesize without diminishing our capacity to innovate. Without implementation, you will lack ultra-six-sigma project management. We believe we know that it is better to redefine virally than to morph transparently. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our mega-re-sizing monitoring but our aptitude to deploy. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent niches and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Metafilter is the industry leader of virally-distributed, co-branded biometrics. We think we know that if you incubate magnetically then you may also upgrade magnetically. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? Without content, you will lack architectures. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our technologies but our ability to implement. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "TQC" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and WAP. Without appropriate infrastructures, web-readiness are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "fractal, user-defined channels" really mean? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Metafilter is the industry leader of transparent reporting. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. Think super-six-sigma, cross-media. Our functionality is unmatched, but our compelling ROI metrics and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J++. The capacity to actualize holistically leads to the capability to mesh compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. The cutting-edge, fractal C2C factor is compelling. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XSLT. Metafilter is the industry leader of viral iteration. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQC but our ability to e-enable. Think intuitive. Think client-focused. Think B2B2C, B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to synergize robustly than to scale perfectly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our turn-key iteration but our power to actualize. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to syndicate. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for handling unplanned-for CAD metrics? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and PGP. We will revalue our ability to extend without decrementing our power to leverage.