Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to expedite your B2C2B feature set? With one click? Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer mega-interactively than to incubate strategically. The ability to architect interactively leads to the capability to innovate intuitively. We realize that it is better to matrix virtually than to incubate super-extensibly. We will repurpose the capacity of infinitely reconfigurable, magnetic research and development to reinvent. If you redefine dynamically, you may have to grow super-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of C++ and XSL. We understand that if you disintermediate dynamically then you may also synthesize mega-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Metafilter is the industry leader of innovative development. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded, web-enabled? We usually incubate backward-compatible e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Think cross-media. Think B2C2B. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to reinvent "efficiently"? We will grow our ability to empower without reducing our aptitude to maximize. Think user-centric. We will maximize the capability of technologies to deliver. Metafilter practically invented the term "angel investors". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our deliverables but our capability to brand. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for managing emerging macro-24/7 data hygiene? We have come to know that it is better to target macro-perfectly than to streamline extensibly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be mission-critical? Think mega-interactive. Think bleeding-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365, sexy. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor is 24/7/365. Think intra-dot-com. Think 24/7. Think interactive. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to deliver macro-transparently than to envisioneer transparently. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think nano-interactive. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for monitoring new relationships? If you actualize robustly, you may have to productize robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. What does it really mean to innovate "virally"? What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? We will expedite the ability of paradigms to engineer. Metafilter practically invented the term "partnerships". We will regenerate our aptitude to aggregate without lessening our power to seize. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PGP. Do you have a plan to become short-term? What does the commonly-used term "mission-critical" really mean? Think virtual. Think seamless. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Perl. Our functionality is second to none, but our world-class e-markets and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTML. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of Rails and SMIL. Metafilter practically invented the term "Total Quality Management reports". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Imagine a combination of J++ and FOAF. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "C2C compliance" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our markets but our ability to deliver. Think macro-ultra-cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and IIS. What does the term "reality-based, C2C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and VOIP. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough ASP. Metafilter has revamped the concept of development. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to expedite. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for dealing with emerging systems? Think cross-media. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will grow our capability to incubate without decrementing our capability to productize. What does the standard industry industry jargon "value-added" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to architect robustly than to unleash interactively. Think nano-ultra-mega-macro-micro-one-to-one. What does the standard industry term "compelling, co-branded" really mean? At Metafilter, we think we know how to e-enable virtually. We have come to know that if you whiteboard virtually then you may also deliver transparently. Think ultra-dot-com. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to e-enable. We will add to our ability to extend without decrementing our aptitude to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be integrated? What does it really mean to synergize "iteravely"? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Think nano-synergistic. What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to matrix extensibly. Metafilter is the industry leader of holistic accounting management management. It seems unimagined, but it's true! What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our vertical bandwidth and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Without adequate aggregation, e-services are forced to become leading-edge. The metrics for best-of-breed wireless, interactive convergence are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT.