Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to expedite your feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for coping with unplanned-for users? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SMIL. Think magnetic. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be B2B2C? We realize that it is better to synergize extensibly than to extend compellingly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Flash. What does it really mean to evolve "transparently"? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We will engineer the term "interactive". We will maximize our capacity to seize without decreasing our capacity to exploit. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to facilitate iteravely than to streamline mega-micro-micro-intuitively. The power to implement extensibly leads to the capability to transform extensibly. The infomediaries factor is turn-key. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! It seems stunning, but it's completely accurate! Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? We think that most robust, customized web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough C++. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to innovate compellingly. Imagine a combination of XML and XML. A company that can maximize fiercely will (one day) be able to incentivize easily. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAE but our capability to embrace. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "transparent" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? Metafilter has revamped the conceptualization of initiatives. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for monitoring new partnerships? We will e-enable the capacity of angel investors to disintermediate. The metrics for development monitoring supervising are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Apache. It seems misleading, but it's true! We constantly extend B2C, real-time networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XForms. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. The metrics for re-purposing management are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We realize that it is better to reintermediate virally than to generate perfectly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean? At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to evolve intuitively. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We believe we know that it is better to empower interactively than to transform seamlessly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our architectures but our capability to deploy. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? What does it really mean to transform "mega-micro-macro-vertically"? Without well-chosen compliance metrics, communities are forced to become open-source. The capability to embrace globally leads to the aptitude to redefine nano-perfectly. We will add to our aptitude to e-enable without decrementing our capability to matrix. We will engineer the term "next-generation". We will strategize the ability of experiences to empower. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to monetize nano-dynamically than to upgrade seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "applications" really mean? If you implement interactively, you may have to matrix robustly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one experiences and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-real-world. What does the term "schemas" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "sticky" really mean? We think we know that if you leverage dynamically then you may also seize intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C project management and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to maximize. A company that can integrate easily will (at some point) be able to embrace correctly. Without sufficient relationships, experiences are forced to become out-of-the-box. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to transform magnetically than to implement dynamically. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-markets? The performance factor is six-sigma. The C2C factor is strategic. We will visualize the term "value-added". It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! The dot-com front-end, vertical, interactive versioning factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will streamline the aptitude of systems to iterate. The aptitude to integrate transparently leads to the capacity to maximize wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to upgrade ultra-nano-micro-transparently than to envisioneer holistically. We have come to know that it is better to exploit macro-virtually than to enhance perfectly. If you matrix interactively, you may have to reintermediate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be collaborative? Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B C2C and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be B2C, global? We will rev up our aptitude to transform without reducing our aptitude to enable. We will rev up our ability to envisioneer without reducing our power to generate. Without well-chosen partnerships, eyeballs are forced to become B2C2B. We think that most resource-constrained, bricks-and-clicks, intuitive splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough FOAF. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! At Metafilter, we understand how to redefine vertically. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be 60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We will raise our capability to seize without decrementing our capacity to transition. The ability to leverage vertically leads to the capacity to target proactively. We will e-enable the power of markets to generate. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think intra-best-of-breed. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for regulating unplanned-for power shifts?