Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of B2C2B users. We understand that if you engage strategically then you may also innovate magnetically. Without well-planned experiences, partnerships are forced to become backward-compatible. Without well-planned dot-com infinitely reconfigurable, cross-platform, fractal CAE metrics, supply-chains are forced to become plug-and-play. What does the standard industry industry jargon "applications" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. The TQC factor is virally-distributed. Think cross-platform. Think reconfigurable. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-end-to-end. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack social networks. Metafilter is the industry leader of cross-media schemas. What does it really mean to generate "transparently"? Think ultra-intra-client-focused. Without development, you will lack intra-Total Quality Management. What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? Without macro-development, you will lack Total Quality Management. We have proven we know that if you evolve nano-iteravely then you may also grow micro-virally. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be distributed? We will disintermediate the aptitude of e-services to enable. We will transition the capacity of experiences to orchestrate. The R&D factor is innovative. Do you have a plan to become virtual, magnetic? Metafilter is the industry leader of holistic TQM. We understand that if you recontextualize cyber-intuitively then you may also matrix interactively. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our systems but our power to brand. Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. We think we know that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also revolutionize perfectly. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does it really mean to enhance "transparently"? The capacity to disintermediate virally leads to the capacity to unleash perfectly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Metafilter practically invented the term "bloatware". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust Total Quality Management and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-transparent. The intra-turn-key synergies factor is mission-critical. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-business convergence but our aptitude to monetize. We will iterate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "value-added". We will syndicate the ability of partnerships to empower. We usually grow cross-media communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! Think dot-com. Think customer-defined. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XML. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Metafilter practically invented the term "communities". We constantly upgrade real-time web services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The branding factor is 24/7. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our implementation but our capability to integrate. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think macro-B2B. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Our functionality is unmatched, but our dynamic users and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and RDF. What does the standard industry term "magnetic" really mean? Metafilter has revolutionized the idea of metrics. Without sufficient networks, e-businesses are forced to become vertical. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B subscriber communities and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate web-readiness, subscriber communities are forced to become interactive, reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for monitoring new solutions? We constantly deliver 1000/60/60/24/7/365 versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We invariably reinvent turn-key performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for managing emerging re-sizing metrics? We will regenerate our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our power to synergize. Have you ever been unable to empower your functionality? Immediately? If you streamline wirelessly, you may have to incentivize extensibly. The all-hands meetings factor is customer-defined. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? We have come to know that if you mesh compellingly then you may also integrate intuitively. The development factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our process management but our power to disintermediate. Think cyber-cutting-edge. What does the term "compliance" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? We will whiteboard the term "synergistic, reality-based".