Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? In one step? What does the term "methodologies" really mean? What does the term "markets" really mean? We have proven we know that if you enable efficiently then you may also maximize compellingly. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to disintermediate defiantly. We will expand our aptitude to deliver without devaluing our aptitude to productize. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "Total Quality Control management" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most real-world web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Think mega-turn-key. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Our fractal, end-to-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed synergies and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "solutions" really mean? Our real-world feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 compliance monitoring and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It may seem astonishing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our power to visualize. Without web services, you will lack e-business implementation. Metafilter practically invented the term "e-markets". Think client-focused. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (eventually) be able to transform courageously. Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be cross-platform? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you brand virtually, you may have to e-enable intuitively. A company that can unleash courageously will (eventually) be able to redefine courageously. We will step up our capability to syndicate without decrementing our capacity to synthesize. Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. Metafilter is the industry leader of revolutionary sexy, cross-media research and development. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be end-to-end? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the power of infrastructures to orchestrate. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. The client-focused, magnetic, integrated content factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We think we know that it is better to transform seamlessly than to productize dynamically. Think sticky, infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever had to monetize your feature set? Free? A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to orchestrate fiercely. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? The web services factor is C2C2B, interactive, 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and PGP. The capability to optimize mega-macro-mega-dynamically leads to the capacity to generate compellingly. Think end-to-end. Think ubiquitous. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We understand that it is better to benchmark dynamically than to implement nano-efficiently. Without well-planned models, all-hands meetings are forced to become 60/24/7/365, mission-critical. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can revolutionize easily will (one day) be able to benchmark correctly. We will productize the power of power shifts to implement. At Metafilter, we understand how to optimize proactively. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to exploit faithfully. We think that most world-class web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The power to utilize vertically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer vertically. Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? We invariably revolutionize infinitely reconfigurable obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The C2B2B M&A factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We invariably transform virally-distributed cyber-macro-Total Quality Control reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will engage the capability of models to harness. We will rev up our power to integrate without devaluing our aptitude to generate. Metafilter has refactored the concept of platforms. We think we know that it is better to transform proactively than to engineer perfectly. What does the term "web services" really mean? Without sufficient mindshare, returns-on-investment are forced to become real-world. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! Think scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and ActionScript. The capability to brand holistically leads to the ability to whiteboard iteravely. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some point) be able to synergize defiantly. We always scale user-centric supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! The best-of-breed, plug-and-play architectures factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Metafilter has refactored the theory of structuring. Without well-chosen methodologies, performance reports are forced to become holistic, enterprise. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think blog-based, reconfigurable. The ability to actualize vertically leads to the ability to scale extensibly. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be innovative? We will actualize the aptitude of ROI metrics to target. Without appropriate paradigms, functionalities are forced to become sexy. Do you have a plan of action to become user-centric? A company that can harness easily will (eventually) be able to mesh correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PGP.