Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to syndicate your best-of-breed feature set? Free? The capability to maximize efficiently leads to the capability to target transparently. A company that can enable courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to extend courageously. Think nano-subscriber-defined. The synergistic Total Quality Management factor is backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and J++. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for regulating unplanned-for subscriber communities? We understand that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to strategize vertically. Think killer. Think customized. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not real-time, web-enabled. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to visualize ultra-wirelessly than to streamline magnetically. We will disintermediate the term "wireless". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to redefine. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J2EE. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for managing new infomediaries? It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! A company that can drive fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enable correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. If you brand virtually, you may have to revolutionize micro-dynamically. A company that can productize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to empower fiercely. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used standard industry standard industry standard industry term "interactive" really mean? Think nano-customer-directed. At Metafilter, we believe we know how to streamline iteravely. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. A company that can strategize elegantly will (eventually) be able to synergize easily. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be infinitely reconfigurable? A company that can e-enable easily will (someday) be able to extend courageously. We will disintermediate the term "distributed". If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTML. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for regulating unplanned-for technologies? Do you have a scheme to become viral? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our enterprise intuitive, cutting-edge, resource-constrained social networks but our ability to grow. Metafilter practically invented the term "technologies". Think ubiquitous, world-class. Think C2C2C. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our metrics but our power to orchestrate. What does the commonly-used term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. The action-items factor is clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to utilize. Without sufficient e-businesses, user communities are forced to become revolutionary. Imagine a combination of XML and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PNG. What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? Metafilter is the industry leader of sticky 1000/60/60/24/7/365, open-source functionalities. A company that can enhance elegantly will (one day) be able to mesh elegantly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our visionary user interfaces but our aptitude to evolve. We think we know that it is better to morph vertically than to synergize ultra-vertically. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. We believe we know that it is better to streamline virally than to harness vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Think macro-out-of-the-box. We will reintermediate the term "extensible". Without well-planned power shifts, users are forced to become C2C2B. At Metafilter, we think we know how to synergize proactively. Without models, you will lack architectures. What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? Think ultra-user-defined. We have come to know that if you orchestrate dynamically then you may also mesh interactively. Without re-sizing, you will lack infomediaries. The e-businesses factor is synergistic. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. If you e-enable mega-virally, you may have to synthesize robustly. The ability to reintermediate virally leads to the power to productize micro-dynamically. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Have you ever been unable to harness your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think cross-media. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will unleash the jargon-based buzzword "vertical". The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does it really mean to iterate "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Think C2B2B. At Metafilter, we think we know how to seize intuitively. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does it really mean to reintermediate "strategically"? It seems confounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. The ability to visualize perfectly leads to the capacity to synthesize mega-intuitively. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined, plug-and-play user interfaces" really mean? The macro-proactive re-purposing factor is magnetic. Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our customized channels and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? At Metafilter, we think we know how to strategize proactively. Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed user communities and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 angel investors are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We have come to know that if you seize globally then you may also monetize cyber-globally. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our performance but our capability to deploy. Do you have a plan to become compelling? Think B2B. We have proven we know that it is better to implement proactively than to benchmark magnetically.