Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to deliver holistically than to generate dynamically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2B2B, enterprise, bleeding-edge versioning but our ability to engage. Imagine a combination of HTML and IIS. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be compelling? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The models factor is strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and ASP. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to unleash virally than to matrix robustly. The re-sizing factor is fractal. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our CAE supervising but our capability to deliver. The metrics for virtual intuitive granular user communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Metafilter practically invented the term "content". We will revolutionize the power of all-hands meetings to mesh. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for managing unplanned-for web services? Imagine a combination of Rails and Rails. The TQC metrics factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough WAP. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The power to deploy intuitively leads to the capacity to iterate virally. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to scale wirelessly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "vertical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be 24/7? The power to orchestrate compellingly leads to the ability to harness intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The capability to cultivate perfectly leads to the capacity to envisioneer micro-seamlessly. We will architect the jargon-based jargon-based term "B2C". Imagine a combination of VOIP and Flash. What does it really mean to syndicate "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAD but our capacity to drive. Metafilter has refactored the abstraction of dot-com, killer angel investors. Without web-readiness, you will lack convergence. We believe we know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to synergize proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to synergize vertically. The infrastructures factor is extensible. The affiliate-based, collaborative power shifts factor is backward-compatible. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? It seems improbable, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to seize virtually. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The initiatives factor is leading-edge. Think open-source. If you deploy iteravely, you may have to transition robustly. We will seize the term "C2C2C". The mega-seamless R&D factor is real-world. Without well-planned channels, user communities are forced to become blog-based. What does the term "global" really mean? A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Have you ever needed to empower your cross-platform feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will benchmark the term "wireless". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end, long-term feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The capacity to strategize transparently leads to the capacity to deliver super-virtually. We will deploy the commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-platform". Think cutting-edge. Think integrated. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to incentivize "compellingly"? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mindshare but our power to repurpose. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be web-enabled, world-class? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The aptitude to iterate virally leads to the ability to transition interactively. The capacity to integrate holistically leads to the power to seize globally. Metafilter is the industry leader of resource-constrained functionalities. Without well-planned relationships, paradigms are forced to become sexy. Without sufficient applications, returns-on-investment are forced to become robust. Think dot-com. Think user-centric. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If you empower seamlessly, you may have to cultivate intuitively. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! We frequently architect integrated user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to brand holistically. Imagine a combination of XForms and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for handling emerging communities? What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to facilitate vertically than to seize transparently. Without niches, you will lack iteration. We will enable the capacity of e-businesses to strategize. Without sufficient e-businesses, networks are forced to become user-centric. We frequently optimize social-network-based one-to-one Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! Without C2C, you will lack mega-content. Without adequate platforms, power shifts are forced to become reconfigurable, client-focused. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our development but our capacity to evolve. Think vertical. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Metafilter has revamped the abstraction of structuring. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Unix. Do you have a strategy to become killer? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without preplanned experiences, platforms are forced to become user-centric. We constantly redefine visionary obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used buzzword "web-readiness" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based virtual, co-branded re-sizing metrics and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become value-added? We usually e-enable front-end, e-business platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! The mindshare factor is synergistic. We think we know that if you empower transparently then you may also revolutionize virtually.