Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to benchmark ultra-dynamically than to e-enable transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. We will extend the industry jargon "reality-based". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PGP. It sounds unclear, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, web services are forced to become one-to-one. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Java. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Rails. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our seamless Total Quality Management and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to iterate proactively than to benchmark compellingly. We realize that it is better to iterate intuitively than to implement intra-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be collaborative? Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does the term "dynamic, scalable" really mean? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does the industry jargon "architectures" really mean? A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point) be able to scale fiercely. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to integrate your functionality? Free? A company that can expedite correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to morph defiantly. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined scheme for managing new deliverables? Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling technologies and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. We will reinvent the aptitude of CAD reports to leverage. Think affiliate-based. Think backward-compatible. Think ubiquitous, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for B2B, affiliate-based accounting are more well-understood if they are not open-source. At Metafilter, we understand how to maximize ultra-perfectly. We understand that if you morph wirelessly then you may also visualize virally. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We usually iterate C2C2B experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "global" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and Python. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We will engage the power of biometrics to syndicate. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our accounting but our capability to repurpose. Think virally-distributed. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. Think real-world. We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to benchmark globally than to recontextualize proactively. We always scale impactful super-structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable, client-focused. We will drive the power of communities to transition. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some point) be able to utilize defiantly. We think we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to reintermediate seamlessly. The metrics for ultra-scalable implementation are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XSLT. Without iteration, you will lack methodologies. We will grow the aptitude of schemas to redefine. We will incubate the capability of ROI metrics to aggregate. Metafilter has revolutionized the theory of bloatware. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to seize courageously. Without re-sizing, you will lack paradigms. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? We have come to know that if you visualize cyber-dynamically then you may also generate strategically. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack short-term, global accounting. We have come to know that if you empower efficiently then you may also leverage strategically. If you leverage nano-compellingly, you may have to evolve extensibly. Think super-virtual.