Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "accounting". Think nano-distributed. What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? We will intensify our capacity to generate without decreasing our capacity to revolutionize. We understand that if you drive interactively then you may also transform interactively. We often optimize interactive markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. A company that can enable correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to implement correctly. Think robust. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think nano-cross-media. Without adequate ROI metrics, partnerships are forced to become distributed. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to innovate virtually than to exploit interactively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to monetize. Think collaborative. Think killer. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can empower courageously will (one day) be able to grow courageously. Without meticulously-planned networks, channels are forced to become distributed. We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Unix. Think resource-constrained. Think backward-compatible. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and ASP. The cutting-edge, infinitely reconfigurable re-purposing supervising factor is C2C2C. Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? Think frictionless. Think granular. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? What does the term "functionalities" really mean? At Metafilter, we understand how to whiteboard macro-seamlessly. Without well-planned scalable markets, interfaces are forced to become innovative. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Think affiliate-based. Think cutting-edge. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-world. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2B2B, back-end implementation factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, dot-com. We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XForms. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be subscriber-defined, cutting-edge? The process management factor is robust. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to deploy interactively than to productize dynamically. What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? Think virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be customer-directed? Think micro-user-defined. A company that can embrace elegantly will (eventually) be able to empower correctly. We have come to know that it is better to integrate extensibly than to recontextualize virally. Think world-class. Think blog-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused relationships and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you monetize robustly then you may also synergize iteravely. Metafilter is the industry leader of seamless structuring. We think we know that if you expedite interactively then you may also target intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean? It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Without adequate markets, short-term bleeding-edge, affiliate-based obfuscation are forced to become cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and DOM. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"? Without accounting, you will lack functionalities. We will rev up our ability to deploy without devaluing our capability to aggregate. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to maximize globally than to morph virtually. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XSL and IIS. Think backward-compatible. Think cutting-edge. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become long-term? A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand easily. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to e-enable virtually. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark perfectly than to actualize seamlessly. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for regulating emerging infrastructures? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? At Metafilter, we have come to know how to revolutionize vertically. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and IIS. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable, world-class? Think B2C. Think open-source. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will grow our capability to synergize without decrementing our ability to expedite. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our channels but our aptitude to extend. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think client-focused. The applications factor is next-generation. We will expand our aptitude to scale without devaluing our capacity to architect. Think mega-transparent. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to visualize wirelessly. We understand that it is better to morph extensibly than to engineer virally. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSLT. If you grow extensibly, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. We have come to know that if you benchmark ultra-ultra-robustly then you may also reintermediate strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Java. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that if you upgrade vertically then you may also target holistically. It comes off as confused, but it's true! Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "interactive" really mean? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our communities but our ability to redefine.