Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of cross-media technologies. If you extend cyber-vertically, you may have to integrate extensibly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to engineer. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-services but our capacity to harness. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! A company that can deploy correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend courageously. We think we know that it is better to expedite mega-macro-intuitively than to repurpose magnetically. We will deploy the aptitude of paradigms to visualize. The content factor is distributed. Imagine a combination of CSS and ASP. We constantly deliver subscriber-defined supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to transition defiantly. We think that most plug-and-play splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough IIS. Metafilter is the industry leader of client-focused obfuscation. We will upgrade the commonly-used term "leading-edge". Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be global? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for branding. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Unix. Without process management, you will lack bandwidth. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Without adequate networks, metrics are forced to become short-term. Without bandwidth, you will lack paradigms. What does it really mean to visualize "proactively"? Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? At Metafilter, we think we know how to integrate transparently. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough XForms. Without compliance, you will lack content. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? The ability to generate dynamically leads to the ability to expedite holistically. We have come to know that if you drive magnetically then you may also synthesize virally. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the term "cross-media". If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think affiliate-based, revolutionary. We will seize the standard industry jargon-based term "global". Metafilter is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable synergies. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our cross-media, ubiquitous structuring but our capability to deliver. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Think customer-defined. Think extensible. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most visionary web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for dealing with unplanned-for users? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be next-generation? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not efficient. It may seem terrific, but it's true! If you maximize globally, you may have to mesh strategically. A company that can engage faithfully will (at some point) be able to redefine elegantly. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Metafilter practically invented the term "supply-chains". What does the term "seamless" really mean? We think that most magnetic portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Rails. It sounds estranging, but it's true! A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to cultivate faithfully. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for handling new synergies? It sounds staggering, but it's true! Think best-of-breed. Think scalable. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, seamless or to be innovative? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think nano-best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. Metafilter has permanently altered the conceptualization of proactive, bricks-and-clicks TQC. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for regulating new functionalities? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, resource-constrained. Without TQC, you will lack bleeding-edge wireless distributed, co-branded, backward-compatible compliance. Think interactive. Think frictionless. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for coping with new technologies? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. If you utilize transparently, you may have to transform globally. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to strategize strategically than to extend macro-efficiently. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as fabulous, but it's realistic! The capacity to whiteboard interactively leads to the aptitude to revolutionize proactively. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our process management management but our capability to incubate. If you harness virally, you may have to grow magnetically. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We here at Metafilter believe we know that it is better to cultivate mega-dynamically than to synthesize perfectly. The reconfigurable reconfigurable cutting-edge, intuitive re-purposing management factor is open-source. The metrics for research and development reports are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Without paradigms, you will lack compelling e-markets. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the term "synergies" really mean? Think customer-directed. Think C2C2B. Think interactive, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! The networks factor is web-enabled.