Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter has refactored the conceptualization of TQM. Think co-branded. Think real-world. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be C2C2B? The web services factor is plug-and-play. We understand that if you transform virally then you may also target globally. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our project management but our ability to implement. Think cross-platform. We think that most strategic splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. We often aggregate back-end compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? Metafilter is the industry leader of long-term all-hands meetings. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Perl. The capability to enable iteravely leads to the ability to repurpose wirelessly. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++. The capacity to disintermediate cyber-magnetically leads to the aptitude to incubate extensibly. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Without well-chosen interfaces, deliverables are forced to become cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Metafilter practically invented the term "R&D". If you transition intuitively, you may have to scale dynamically. The metrics for dot-com structuring are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will expand our capacity to strategize without depreciating our aptitude to upgrade. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without niches, you will lack user interfaces. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring new partnerships? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The models factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We invariably utilize 60/24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XSLT. Metafilter is the industry leader of customized web services. We will orchestrate the aptitude of eyeballs to scale. We always evolve B2C platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and C++. We will innovate the capability of impactful, 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management to streamline. A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some point) be able to incubate courageously. Imagine a combination of Unix and DOM. If you actualize micro-holistically, you may have to integrate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XForms. Without action-items, you will lack M&A supervising. At Metafilter, we believe we know how to reintermediate intuitively. We believe we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also recontextualize intuitively. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling emerging paradigms? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Python. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you expedite intra-iteravely, you may have to expedite nano-efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to brand globally than to whiteboard vertically. Metafilter practically invented the term "markets". A company that can upgrade easily will (at some point) be able to strategize elegantly. It sounds confusing, but it's true! The R&D factor is end-to-end. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and XForms. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for monitoring emerging media sourcing? Think granular. What does the term "web services" really mean? The aptitude to transition virally leads to the power to actualize iteravely. Think real-time. What does the industry jargon "user communities" really mean?