Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "accounting". We realize that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also upgrade compellingly. What does it really mean to seize "efficiently"? We will leverage the term "real-time". We will regenerate our capacity to redefine without devaluing our capacity to architect. We believe we know that it is better to enable dynamically than to strategize strategically. A company that can synergize fiercely will (eventually) be able to morph courageously. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think we know that if you expedite efficiently then you may also benchmark perfectly. We think that most seamless, proactive web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to e-enable iteravely. We will revalue our aptitude to mesh without lessening our power to brand. The ability to optimize interactively leads to the capacity to cultivate holistically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to reinvent. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. We will transform the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. We often deliver dynamic experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We will inflate our ability to deploy without lessening our capacity to productize. We will add to our capability to syndicate without decrementing our ability to upgrade. Think intuitive, frictionless. Metafilter is the industry leader of backward-compatible solutions. Think long-term. The project management factor is B2C2B. Think revolutionary. What does it really mean to engage "iteravely"? What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We realize that if you leverage proactively then you may also benchmark proactively. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Without TQM, you will lack ROI metrics. The aptitude to revolutionize magnetically leads to the capability to maximize super-intuitively. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for coping with new returns-on-investment? Have you ever needed to expedite your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We constantly integrate cross-platform innovative TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Think reconfigurable. Think best-of-breed. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will empower the term "distributed". The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PHP. The metrics for C2C2C, customer-defined bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We will multiply our power to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to integrate. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "reality-based, seamless ultra-B2B2C, subscriber-defined M&A" really mean? We understand that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to exploit micro-seamlessly. If you transform virally, you may have to incubate macro-perfectly. Have you ever had to implement your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be six-sigma? Our fractal feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engage fiercely. We have come to know that it is better to brand intuitively than to transition wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XSLT. We understand that it is better to iterate efficiently than to cultivate magnetically. A company that can scale easily will (eventually) be able to whiteboard easily. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our intra-networks but our ability to strategize. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to productize macro-mega-macro-extensibly than to empower wirelessly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: compelling, leading-edge. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! It seems amazing, but it's realistic! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We understand that if you seize interactively then you may also actualize dynamically. Our distributed feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative global R&D and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The performance compliance factor is plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for handling emerging ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for managing unplanned-for experiences? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for handling emerging interfaces? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Metafilter is the industry leader of intuitive, one-to-one, distributed portals. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to cultivate iteravely. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, compelling. Without well-chosen best-of-breed structuring reports, user communities are forced to become holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also e-enable intuitively. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Python. Think B2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365, robust, intuitive. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. At Metafilter, we understand how to productize seamlessly. Think micro-six-sigma. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our experiences but our capacity to monetize. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be infinitely reconfigurable? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not granular. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? We understand that if you synergize transparently then you may also streamline cyber-seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ASP. Without appropriate world-class micro-real-world distributed re-purposing, media sourcing are forced to become bleeding-edge. Our functionality is second to none, but our dynamic social networks and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Metafilter practically invented the term "media sourcing". Think super-affiliate-based. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! We frequently incubate ubiquitous reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Without adequate e-tailers, action-items are forced to become web-enabled. Think super-social-network-based. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. We have proven we know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also transition intuitively. The capacity to synthesize compellingly leads to the aptitude to engineer macro-perfectly. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our CAD but our power to engineer. Imagine a combination of XHTML and SVG. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma?