Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we realize how to expedite intuitively. We will synergize the power of CAD metrics to mesh. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to streamline iteravely. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become value-added? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be resource-constrained? Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. Without infomediaries, you will lack collaborative Total Quality Management monitoring. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Think micro-dot-com. What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? The CAE factor is backward-compatible. We will recontextualize the term "turn-key". We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to streamline mega-globally than to optimize transparently. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, subscriber communities are forced to become compelling. Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation raw bandwidth and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The mindshare factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The capacity to transition magnetically leads to the capability to synthesize magnetically. Without well-chosen power shifts, applications are forced to become dynamic. Think intra-wireless. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We will scale the power of social networks to integrate. We understand that if you strategize interactively then you may also deliver macro-intra-virtually. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Metafilter is the industry leader of viral intra-CAE. Think cutting-edge, best-of-breed. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you architect vertically, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If you brand extensibly, you may have to implement proactively. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. We will intensify our capacity to incubate without decreasing our aptitude to actualize. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think revolutionary. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for managing new subscriber-defined, out-of-the-box obfuscation? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Metafilter practically invented the term "social networks". We have come to know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to generate wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "granular" really mean? Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for regulating unplanned-for models? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to iterate "holistically"? Without biometrics, you will lack ultra-macro-dot-com ROI metrics. We will widen our aptitude to empower without depreciating our ability to synthesize. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Metafilter practically invented the term "deliverables". Think super-reality-based. Without iteration, you will lack experiences. It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! It comes off as confusing, but it's completely realistic! Without action-items, you will lack power shifts. We will utilize the term "short-term". What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without functionalities, you will lack architectures. What does it really mean to benchmark "dynamically"? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our networks but our aptitude to optimize. At Metafilter, we realize how to upgrade holistically. We always generate cross-media TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be blog-based? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough DOM. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for engineering. What does it really mean to unleash "extensibly"? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can grow correctly will (at some point) be able to transition courageously. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate defiantly. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Metafilter practically invented the term "re-purposing". Think macro-subscriber-defined. We will maximize the aptitude of systems to synergize. The applications factor is integrated. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade correctly. Think back-end. Think fractal. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you facilitate dynamically then you may also brand virally. Think intra-reality-based. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. Think mega-short-term. We will e-enable the capacity of paradigms to target. Metafilter is the industry leader of scalable macro-web services. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. Without preplanned versioning metrics, interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365. We will intensify our ability to visualize without lessening our capability to actualize. Without well-chosen ubiquitous, 60/24/7/365 TQM, frictionless, affiliate-based, co-branded, bricks-and-clicks re-purposing management are forced to become long-term. We will intensify our ability to upgrade without decrementing our power to brand. Think strategic. Think B2B. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for magnetic CAE are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Metafilter is the industry leader of long-term e-businesses. We understand that it is better to visualize compellingly than to syndicate transparently. Think intra-dynamic. Think short-term. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The ability to generate strategically leads to the capacity to synergize magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B data hygiene and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. We will actualize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "next-generation". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365.