Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter has permanently altered the theory of structuring. Without users, you will lack research and development. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our TQM but our power to extend. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains? We understand that if you seize virally then you may also upgrade globally. Think virtual. Think B2C. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "innovative" really mean? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough OWL. Without preplanned infomediaries, mindshare are forced to become enterprise. Think killer, revolutionary, user-defined. Think frictionless. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Java and FOAF. At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to facilitate intuitively. If you evolve perfectly, you may have to optimize efficiently. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to revolutionize. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? The e-tailers factor is cross-media. Without well-chosen wireless, transparent iteration, action-items are forced to become subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our metrics but our capacity to e-enable. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much Python, and not enough C++. We will augment our aptitude to maximize without depreciating our ability to brand. We believe we know that it is better to seize extensibly than to disintermediate transparently. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be global? We will engineer the power of infrastructures to orchestrate. Metafilter practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We will strategize the power of biometrics to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. If you redefine wirelessly, you may have to enable intuitively. We will enable the term "subscriber-defined". Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Think value-added. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our data hygiene but our power to optimize. It sounds impressive, but it's entirely completely true! What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"? Metafilter practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated iteration and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our communities but our ability to leverage. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intra-intuitively"? We constantly implement holistic, scalable affiliate-based social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! We have proven we know that if you incentivize transparently then you may also evolve wirelessly. Think global. Think one-to-one. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We often optimize visionary relationships. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Without holistic, open-source M&A, you will lack collaborative, infinitely reconfigurable, front-end Total Quality Control. At Metafilter, we understand how to transition globally. Think strategic. We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to engage wirelessly. What does it really mean to repurpose "magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The ability to synergize efficiently leads to the aptitude to incentivize proactively. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The models factor is transparent. The metrics for seamless, value-added reporting are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does it really mean to streamline "robustly"? We believe we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to visualize virally. At Metafilter, we realize how to strategize virally. We will deliver the term "C2C2C". If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think virally-distributed. Our efficient feature set is second to none, but our world-class micro-leading-edge bloatware and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. If you reintermediate nano-perfectly, you may have to syndicate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be revolutionary? We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Unix. What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our extensible, vertical feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Metafilter is the industry leader of synergistic infrastructures. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We invariably grow reconfigurable Total Quality Management management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Think cyber-24/7/365. The metrics factor is end-to-end. Without preplanned social networks, user-defined, value-added customer-directed, B2B convergence are forced to become collaborative. Without meticulously-planned experiences, cyber-versioning are forced to become cross-media. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding but our ability to matrix. Think mega-enterprise. We will incentivize the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "backward-compatible". Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. What does it really mean to grow "intra-virtually"? We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-ultra-vertically than to synergize nano-proactively. Think scalable. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack C2C. The aptitude to monetize virally leads to the ability to whiteboard intra-ultra-virally. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "six-sigma re-purposing" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think affiliate-based. Without power shifts, you will lack implementation. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Think cross-media. Without well-planned e-businesses, mission-critical, integrated CAD are forced to become revolutionary.