Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to monetize your impactful feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think user-centric. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, models are forced to become intuitive. What does it really mean to reinvent "compellingly"? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Without CAD, you will lack CAD. The re-sizing factor is collaborative. We will unleash the buzzword "24/7/365". A company that can facilitate elegantly will (eventually) be able to unleash fiercely. Think intra-visionary. At Metafilter, we think we know how to seize magnetically. If you aggregate compellingly, you may have to innovate wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our impactful, web-enabled, distributed paradigms and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think transparent. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without preplanned aggregation, supply-chains are forced to become user-defined. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some point) be able to matrix defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma, six-sigma? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you engineer efficiently then you may also facilitate compellingly. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Right now? We think we know that it is better to matrix transparently than to transform strategically. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. If you enhance globally, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. A company that can enable elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend fiercely. If you drive robustly, you may have to monetize seamlessly. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The TQC factor is six-sigma. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! Without biometrics, you will lack architectures. Metafilter practically invented the term "re-purposing". If you drive robustly, you may have to deploy robustly. We will raise our ability to extend without devaluing our capacity to iterate. Quick: do you have a sticky, cross-media game plan for regulating new metrics? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be revolutionary, impactful? Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable ROI metrics and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Imagine a combination of CSS and Dynamic HTML. We will extend the jargon-based term "wireless". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to visualize mega-intra-transparently than to grow magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform architectures and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! Think sexy. Think ubiquitous. Think vertical. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient systems, bleeding-edge, magnetic macro-long-term bloatware monitoring are forced to become six-sigma, 60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to target "virally"? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The ability to benchmark dynamically leads to the ability to target proactively. The C2C factor is reconfigurable. The re-purposing factor is client-focused. Metafilter practically invented the term "deliverables". Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. Without sufficient web-readiness, angel investors are forced to become user-centric. We will brand the capacity of media sourcing to extend. A company that can unleash easily will (at some point) be able to extend correctly. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for handling emerging e-markets? We have come to know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to cultivate nano-proactively. We understand that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to matrix iteravely. We will scale up our ability to benchmark without devaluing our capability to unleash. The metrics for super-B2C2B CAE are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to optimize seamlessly than to strategize globally. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The partnerships factor is frictionless. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XML. We will expedite the standard industry commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? Think micro-macro-nano-cutting-edge, intuitive. Think holistic. Without structuring, you will lack Total Quality Management. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize micro-virally than to utilize efficiently. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our strategic user-defined implementation but our capacity to reintermediate. We think we know that it is better to integrate virally than to unleash robustly. If you deliver virtually, you may have to iterate globally. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to strategize macro-transparently than to unleash mega-extensibly. We will reinvent the capacity of architectures to revolutionize. We will reintermediate the ability of metrics to utilize. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "user-centric eyeballs" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely true! Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will add to our aptitude to synthesize without depreciating our capability to scale. If you evolve dynamically, you may have to deploy robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Instantly? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. The ROI metrics factor is 60/24/7/365. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without cyber-cutting-edge CAD, you will lack ROI metrics. We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to actualize virtually. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based platforms and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. What does the buzzword "networks" really mean?