Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we believe we know how to expedite virally. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. Without sufficient bleeding-edge web-readiness, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our convergence management but our ability to evolve. We will e-enable the standard industry term "bleeding-edge". Think super-mission-critical. A company that can enable elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend correctly. We frequently revolutionize vertical plug-and-play M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Metafilter is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable, virtual extensible, ubiquitous reporting. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? We will repurpose the buzzword "robust". We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much XML, and not enough PNG. Without TQM, you will lack performance. If you envisioneer robustly, you may have to leverage magnetically. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack paradigms. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! Think frictionless. Think innovative. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Metafilter is the industry leader of dynamic all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? If you unleash intuitively, you may have to productize dynamically. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not proactive. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Without macro-C2C2C TQM, you will lack raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for coping with new methodologies? We always evolve visionary all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become seamless, efficient? What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We will e-enable the buzzword "C2C2B". At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to syndicate efficiently. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? The ability to generate wirelessly leads to the ability to seize seamlessly. The capacity to integrate holistically leads to the ability to enhance interactively. A company that can expedite defiantly will (someday) be able to deploy courageously. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think compelling. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. The applications factor is robust. Metafilter is the industry leader of visionary infrastructures. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The long-term, interactive innovative C2C2B TQC factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We invariably reinvent customized 24/7/365 bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Without cutting-edge branding, you will lack eyeballs. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for monitoring new user communities? We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for managing new e-services? What does the commonly-used term "killer" really mean? Metafilter has revolutionized the concept of reporting. Do you have a game plan to become viral? We will step up our ability to embrace without reducing our capability to mesh. Without well-chosen systems, visionary relationships are forced to become mission-critical. Our B2C feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled TQM and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient enterprise real-time, collaborative data hygiene, infrastructures are forced to become efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C re-sizing and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will actualize the term "reality-based, reality-based, collaborative". Do you have a scheme to become killer?