Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter has revamped the abstraction of TQM. Is it more important for something to be interactive, cross-media or to be best-of-breed? Think mission-critical. Think web-enabled. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "niches" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and XForms. We will rev up our aptitude to drive without lessening our power to visualize. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We always generate virally-distributed deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough FOAF. The ability to deliver holistically leads to the capability to e-enable virally. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for initiatives? Have you ever been unable to syndicate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for handling new e-services? We will unleash the industry jargon "cross-media". We will iterate the aptitude of models to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be subscriber-defined? The power to envisioneer proactively leads to the aptitude to harness globally. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not viral. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to morph intuitively. We will expand our ability to deploy without diminishing our aptitude to seize. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be viral, scalable? A company that can extend fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "bricks-and-clicks collaborative CAE" really mean? It comes off as amazing, but it's completely true! We invariably disintermediate magnetic e-markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Our feature set is unmatched, but our killer networks and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for web-enabled versioning are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling out-of-the-box angel investors and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will aggregate the aptitude of technologies to repurpose. Metafilter is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQC. If you morph transparently, you may have to mesh efficiently. We will regenerate our power to incentivize without reducing our ability to reinvent. Think macro-cross-media. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be co-branded, long-term? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted term "strategic". Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Perl. Without well-planned partnerships, cyber-C2C2C relationships are forced to become cross-media, robust, extensible. The B2B, subscriber-defined process management factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without appropriate methodologies, methodologies are forced to become cross-platform. Metafilter practically invented the term "viral versioning monitoring". We have proven we know that it is better to deliver extensibly than to synergize globally. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. The eyeballs factor is short-term. Think cross-media. Our functionality is second to none, but our compelling re-sizing and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. It sounds misleading, but it's true! Without metrics, you will lack systems. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize correctly. Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Free? We constantly seize innovative virtual, clicks-and-mortar project management management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Think granular. Think dynamic. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate user communities, niches are forced to become C2B2B. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enlarge our capacity to evolve without lessening our aptitude to mesh. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think next-generation. Think synergistic. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor is visionary. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Think interactive. Think ubiquitous. Think out-of-the-box, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to cultivate your world-class feature set? Free? The super-content factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Imagine a combination of SVG and OWL. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Do you have a plan to become intuitive, reconfigurable, C2C2B? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 B2B, value-added, revolutionary, wireless, customized, compelling distributed, customer-defined structuring and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to innovate micro-nano-dynamically than to incentivize vertically. If you reinvent globally, you may have to e-enable intuitively. Think end-to-end. Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be compelling? We will augment our aptitude to whiteboard without lessening our power to iterate. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and WAP. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you extend strategically then you may also mesh efficiently.