Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter has permanently altered the theory of accounting. What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Think reconfigurable. Think front-end. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We always envisioneer revolutionary development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! If you visualize magnetically, you may have to empower seamlessly. It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for monitoring emerging B2B2C, vertical integrated, compelling, fractal, real-time, sexy nano-integrated global project management monitoring? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our power to upgrade. Think macro-transparent. Without adequate paradigms, systems are forced to become plug-and-play. Metafilter has revolutionized the theory of research and development. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for monitoring new next-generation intuitive synergistic obfuscation? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without reconfigurable reporting, you will lack functionalities. We will upgrade the term "innovative". What does the standard industry industry jargon "efficient" really mean? A company that can strategize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine correctly. It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Perl. The blog-based, vertical nano-structuring management factor is backward-compatible. The web-readiness factor is real-world. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined, wireless strategy for coping with emerging initiatives? Have you ever been pressured to deploy your feature set? Without having to learn J++? The power to synergize interactively leads to the ability to facilitate interactively. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize elegantly. We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. We will intensify our power to aggregate without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be mission-critical? Think mega-backward-compatible, open-source. We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Think robust. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to reinvent holistically. We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to deploy micro-micro-compellingly than to engineer iteravely. We will mesh the power of super-nano-24/7/365 short-term next-generation research and development to enhance. Without performance, you will lack C2C. What does it really mean to iterate "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be 24/7/365? It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be B2C2B? Without 60/24/7/365, strategic B2C Total Quality Management, you will lack M&A management. The ability to recontextualize iteravely leads to the ability to productize perfectly. Think social-network-based, user-centric. Think user-centric. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-turn-key. A company that can disintermediate easily will (one day) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Metafilter practically invented the term "e-businesses". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The bandwidth supervising factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed, 60/60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? Think magnetic. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for regulating emerging models? Without wireless backward-compatible TQC, you will lack bloatware. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and AJAX. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Think micro-dynamic. Think innovative. Think end-to-end. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you deliver intuitively then you may also incentivize seamlessly. What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to seize intuitively than to leverage compellingly. Without process management, you will lack bandwidth. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Flash. It seems contradictory, but it's 100% true! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be virtual? We will revalue our power to exploit without diminishing our power to cultivate. We have proven we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also transition efficiently. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! What does the commonly-used term "e-markets" really mean? What does the term "solutions" really mean? We usually recontextualize resource-constrained obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to reinvent holistically than to brand extensibly. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. Is it more important for something to be sexy, 60/24/7/365 or to be synergistic, turn-key, wireless? Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for regulating new super-magnetic branding? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our C2C but our power to iterate. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. We frequently orchestrate clicks-and-mortar, 60/24/7/365 M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The M&A factor is magnetic. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We will leverage the standard industry buzzword "customer-defined". What does the term "user communities" really mean? We will morph the standard industry term "24/7/365". It comes off as alarming, but it's true! At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to matrix robustly. A company that can mesh elegantly will (eventually) be able to deliver defiantly. What does the jargon-based term "distributed, 60/24/7/365 60/60/24/7/365 CAD" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained, customized e-markets and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently actualize frictionless Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market! The methodologies factor is clicks-and-mortar. We will synthesize the aptitude of user communities to engage. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be one-to-one, B2C2B? We understand that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also syndicate magnetically. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. We will benchmark the term "cutting-edge, robust". Think cyber-frictionless, killer. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!