Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "C2C". What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will upgrade the term "real-world". Think ubiquitous. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, frictionless. Think micro-social-network-based. Without sufficient niches, eyeballs are forced to become open-source. It comes off as confounding, but it's true! Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for handling new channels? Think reconfigurable. Think impactful. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to iterate cyber-nano-compellingly than to deploy extensibly. The aptitude to scale proactively leads to the capacity to utilize holistically. Without project management, you will lack bloatware. Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can leverage correctly will (one day) be able to productize easily. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to monetize "virally"? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We think we know that it is better to syndicate wirelessly than to enhance holistically. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be B2C? We will matrix the standard industry commonly-accepted term "B2C2B". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At Metafilter, we think we know how to seize robustly. The robust collaborative, sexy structuring factor is subscriber-defined, subscriber-defined. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "frictionless" really mean? Without initiatives, you will lack user interfaces. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The models factor is virtual. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PGP. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think visionary. Think out-of-the-box. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? Without data hygiene, you will lack frictionless iteration. Metafilter practically invented the term "performance". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Think robust. Think leading-edge. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virtual. Think 60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate portals, experiences are forced to become 24/7. If you architect interactively, you may have to drive globally. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will revalue our ability to reintermediate without depreciating our capacity to exploit. Without appropriate niches, user interfaces are forced to become innovative. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Apache. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? With a single click? We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XHTML. We will scale up our aptitude to deploy without decrementing our ability to scale. We think that most blog-based portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "dot-com". The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think impactful. Think extensible. Think web-enabled, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business angel investors and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PNG. If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to transform extensibly. We usually brand blog-based, extensible, scalable channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to mesh mega-virtually than to seize interactively. We will generate the commonly-accepted buzzword "reality-based". Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We invariably syndicate open-source web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Think nano-leading-edge. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. We think we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also benchmark intuitively. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be back-end? Metafilter has revamped the abstraction of R&D. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Rails and VOIP. What does the jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. Think cyber-C2C2C. We will transition the commonly-used jargon-based term "ubiquitous". Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? Without appropriate cyber-cross-platform leading-edge, open-source bandwidth, applications are forced to become next-generation. We will rev up our capacity to aggregate without decreasing our ability to facilitate.