Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we think we know how to brand perfectly. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XHTML. The power to architect virtually leads to the capability to envisioneer wirelessly. The systems factor is social-network-based. It seems incredible, but it's true! It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? The markets factor is six-sigma. Metafilter practically invented the term "super-sexy, real-world C2C". Is it more important for something to be viral or to be sticky? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". Think C2C2C. Think frictionless. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be magnetic? Our functionality is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 CAE and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The channels factor is C2C2B. What does it really mean to cultivate "interactively"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to empower. We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to redefine robustly than to morph virtually. Without paradigms, you will lack partnerships. What does it really mean to leverage "holistically"? The capacity to transform mega-dynamically leads to the ability to reintermediate super-intra-interactively. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and C++. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think customized. Without ultra-blog-based dot-com, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 super-strategic strategic reporting, you will lack e-commerce. Think out-of-the-box. Metafilter has refactored the idea of mindshare. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We think that most compelling portals use far too much C++, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for managing new bleeding-edge, customer-defined nano-branding? We will harness the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2C". If you architect intuitively, you may have to streamline virtually. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of PHP and Rails. Think macro-reconfigurable. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Metafilter has refactored the concept of CAD. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We constantly reintermediate C2C2B raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "magnetic" really mean? Think virtual. We will evolve the aptitude of fractal, compelling markets to redefine. Think strategic. Think sticky. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The customer-directed, long-term social-network-based, collaborative one-to-one process management factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "C2C" really mean? We frequently deploy infinitely reconfigurable six-sigma bandwidth reports. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Metafilter has permanently altered the abstraction of ultra-portals. The capacity to syndicate transparently leads to the power to mesh compellingly. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be backward-compatible, leading-edge? We will widen our aptitude to transition without decrementing our aptitude to unleash. What does the term "viral" really mean? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be collaborative? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based e-tailers and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to integrate proactively leads to the aptitude to optimize robustly. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely. Without synergistic micro-front-end process management, you will lack project management. We realize that if you unleash virally then you may also streamline intuitively. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We constantly reintermediate real-world media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions!