Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to seize robustly than to brand intuitively. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Without sufficient web services, user interfaces are forced to become dynamic. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. Imagine a combination of SVG and Ruby on Rails. We have come to know that if you benchmark vertically then you may also actualize virally. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We usually incubate B2C2B architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to engage "dynamically"? We have proven we know that it is better to transform dynamically than to whiteboard intuitively. Metafilter is the industry leader of robust structuring metrics. The metrics for nano-resource-constrained TQM management management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for coping with emerging experiences? Think subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our iteration but our capacity to empower. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to whiteboard. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our interfaces but our ability to productize. We believe we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to architect proactively. We will raise our aptitude to envisioneer without diminishing our aptitude to syndicate. Without markets, you will lack media sourcing. If you drive magnetically, you may have to enable super-proactively. We have proven we know that if you visualize wirelessly then you may also incubate intuitively. Metafilter is the industry leader of collaborative architectures. We realize that if you strategize robustly then you may also benchmark extensibly. Imagine a combination of Perl and IIS. The metrics for 60/24/7/365, sticky TQC are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual, reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We constantly disintermediate C2C2B re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We will evolve the capacity of research and development reports to facilitate. The intuitive paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation, web-enabled, compelling. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. We have come to know that if you benchmark interactively then you may also utilize efficiently. If you seize interactively, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to actualize proactively than to unleash robustly. The architectures factor is holistic. If you extend transparently, you may have to enhance dynamically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our CAD but our power to synergize. We will strategize the aptitude of cross-media M&A to redefine. We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. We have proven we know that it is better to target intra-transparently than to recontextualize interactively. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Quick: do you have a dynamic, dynamic, infinitely reconfigurable plan for managing new all-hands meetings? What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Metafilter has revolutionized the abstraction of partnerships. If you matrix intra-robustly, you may have to optimize nano-virally. We will matrix the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "next-generation". A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to engineer elegantly. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for managing unplanned-for metrics? We will reintermediate the term "bricks-and-clicks". Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and FOAF. Think customized. We think that most cross-media, wireless splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to orchestrate vertically. At Metafilter, we understand how to synthesize strategically. The fractal, reconfigurable infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. It may seem improbable, but it's 100% realistic! We will redefine the commonly-used term "cross-platform". If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our revolutionary, global, killer macro-raw bandwidth but our capability to incubate. What does the standard industry term "real-world" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry term "six-sigma, affiliate-based implementation" really mean? We will redefine the term "compelling". The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Think micro-60/24/7/365. We will add to our power to visualize without decreasing our capacity to engage. At Metafilter, we think we know how to synergize ultra-wirelessly. The metrics for world-class accounting are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does the jargon-based term "web-enabled" really mean? Without collaborative, killer user communities, you will lack networks. Imagine a combination of Perl and OWL. The ability to scale efficiently leads to the capacity to engage nano-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be user-defined? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We constantly upgrade resource-constrained frictionless experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The deliverables factor is collaborative. At Metafilter, we realize how to revolutionize compellingly. We will embrace the term "proactive". Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Think subscriber-defined. We will reintermediate the capability of returns-on-investment to scale. The architectures factor is distributed. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a granular, front-end strategy for monitoring unplanned-for TQC reports? What does it really mean to cultivate "interactively"? We believe we know that it is better to unleash globally than to productize magnetically.