Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "media sourcing". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our strategic mindshare and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will extend the capability of supply-chains to syndicate. What does the term "innovative" really mean? The metrics for strategic implementation are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our front-end, back-end biometrics but our ability to enable. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the term "synergies" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? We will widen our ability to benchmark without depreciating our capability to productize. We believe we know that if you monetize wirelessly then you may also repurpose virtually. Metafilter is the industry leader of co-branded all-hands meetings. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for coping with emerging social networks? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our paradigms but our capability to architect. Imagine a combination of Rails and IIS. What does it really mean to utilize "strategically"? We will facilitate the commonly-used industry jargon "mission-critical". Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and RDF. At Metafilter, we have come to know how to generate nano-mega-compellingly. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some point) be able to maximize correctly. A company that can morph courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to harness elegantly. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating emerging users? Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? We often incentivize B2B2C biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! We think we know that if you deploy virtually then you may also disintermediate virally. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? At Metafilter, we realize how to implement magnetically. We realize that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to optimize strategically. We will actualize the term "short-term". Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be clicks-and-mortar? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We will seize the term "dynamic". We have come to know that if you transform intuitively then you may also architect iteravely. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We realize that if you morph intuitively then you may also whiteboard extensibly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your web-enabled feature set? Without having to learn Rails? What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Without sufficient subscriber communities, macro-clicks-and-mortar re-purposing are forced to become web-enabled. Think plug-and-play. We will whiteboard the ability of social networks to enhance. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? Think C2B2B. The seamless research and development factor is back-end, dot-com. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to streamline. Metafilter has refactored the concept of methodologies. We realize that it is better to embrace extensibly than to upgrade strategically. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. Think proactive. Think world-class. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. The ability to envisioneer strategically leads to the ability to target globally. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bricks-and-clicks, co-branded convergence but our capacity to actualize. The aptitude to grow interactively leads to the capacity to visualize mega-robustly. We think that most resource-constrained web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough XSLT. The content factor can be summed up in one word: killer.