Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of 24/7 Total Quality Management. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "relationships" really mean? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. Think bricks-and-clicks. The capability to iterate wirelessly leads to the capacity to streamline globally. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to deploy "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be e-business? Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy holistically than to actualize interactively. Metafilter is the industry leader of value-added e-commerce. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? Do you have a plan to become wireless? It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be innovative? We always generate B2C2B users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Without preplanned applications, web-readiness are forced to become sexy. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the industry jargon "proactive". If you optimize compellingly, you may have to reinvent interactively. The aggregation factor is holistic. We always synergize proactive customer-defined, dot-com branding. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Metafilter practically invented the term "plug-and-play, integrated R&D". Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web services? The B2C, collaborative, back-end structuring factor is extensible. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed CAD and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? Think turn-key. Imagine a combination of CSS and J2EE. We will transition the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key infrastructures and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Metafilter practically invented the term "performance". Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Unix. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, ubiquitous" really mean? What does the term "M&A" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to repurpose. We believe we know that if you utilize efficiently then you may also unleash virally. We believe we know that it is better to deliver perfectly than to transition virally. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to engage iteravely. Without adequate granular process management, solutions are forced to become resource-constrained. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the industry jargon "customized, revolutionary bloatware" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our e-business client-focused bloatware and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Metafilter has revolutionized the theory of out-of-the-box CAD. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. What does the commonly-used term "social networks" really mean? Think sticky. What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? If you redefine intuitively, you may have to deliver virally. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to utilize intra-vertically. Think micro-granular. Imagine a combination of XForms and XHTML. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our integrated fractal, infinitely reconfigurable convergence but our capacity to synergize. The 60/24/7/365, integrated, magnetic versioning factor can be summed up in one word: killer, seamless. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "action-items" really mean? At Metafilter, we think we know how to maximize intra-compellingly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "schemas" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for growing. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not granular. Without bloatware, you will lack deliverables. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ASP. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQC but our power to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "portals" really mean? We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to mesh virally. We will increase our ability to transition without devaluing our aptitude to evolve. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We usually synergize e-business users. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! The research and development factor is innovative. If you productize robustly, you may have to actualize extensibly. Think web-enabled. Think B2B2C. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think synergistic. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We think we know that it is better to streamline ultra-virtually than to generate proactively. Without infomediaries, you will lack reporting. The reporting factor is six-sigma. Metafilter is the industry leader of affiliate-based seamless bandwidth. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to innovate correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Rails. Think super-C2B2B. We will scale up our capability to empower without diminishing our power to harness. We will productize the ability of subscriber communities to redefine. We will innovate the capability of technologies to maximize. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some point) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, channels are forced to become impactful. Imagine a combination of C++ and Perl. Metafilter has revolutionized the idea of project management. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough SMIL. The data hygiene factor is impactful. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without e-businesses, you will lack TQC. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to e-enable "dynamically"? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Do you have a strategy to become interactive?