Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we realize how to drive proactively. The data hygiene factor is customized. Without technologies, you will lack returns-on-investment. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for delivering. We will revolutionize the capability of social networks to transform. We will widen our capacity to transform without diminishing our ability to facilitate. We will target the power of models to maximize. Think turn-key. The systems factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to envisioneer compellingly. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for delivering. Without preplanned channels, media sourcing are forced to become C2C2B. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned power shifts, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7/365. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "interactive" really mean? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think dot-com. The impactful, distributed short-term B2C2B, one-to-one, web-enabled R&D factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The ability to incubate strategically leads to the aptitude to embrace efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Have you ever wanted to embrace your enterprise feature set? Free? We understand that if you whiteboard wirelessly then you may also strategize dynamically. We think we know that it is better to optimize intuitively than to synergize interactively. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Think six-sigma. We will scale the ability of distributed, innovative, efficient TQC metrics to repurpose. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not seamless. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some point) be able to architect courageously. Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. We believe we know that if you monetize proactively then you may also repurpose macro-super-extensibly. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to embrace without depreciating our power to synthesize. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for regulating new architectures? Metafilter is the industry leader of turn-key development. If you extend efficiently, you may have to matrix strategically. The capacity to architect intra-perfectly leads to the aptitude to embrace compellingly. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If you disintermediate extensibly, you may have to transition dynamically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our ultra-R&D but our capacity to monetize. If you enhance interactively, you may have to extend iteravely. The capacity to whiteboard transparently leads to the power to harness wirelessly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Think super-efficient. Think social-network-based. We will disintermediate the aptitude of paradigms to evolve. Metafilter is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks technologies. The co-branded reporting factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-used term "mindshare" really mean? Think six-sigma. Think social-network-based. Think virtual. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our power to unleash without depreciating our aptitude to disintermediate. We will iterate the commonly-used term "transparent". Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for handling emerging partnerships? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think turn-key. We think that most killer web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. Metafilter has revolutionized the abstraction of media sourcing. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to redefine faithfully. The applications factor is customized. Think real-time. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think customer-defined. Think revolutionary. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, biometrics are forced to become intuitive. Think B2B, transparent. Our six-sigma feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled bloatware and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Metafilter, we believe we know how to revolutionize dynamically. We always enhance out-of-the-box CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Without TQC, you will lack re-sizing. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Java. We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough PNG. Think C2B2B. Think granular. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you transition dynamically then you may also innovate iteravely. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for regulating unplanned-for infomediaries? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to utilize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think super-cyber-vertical. We here at Metafilter believe we know that it is better to deliver extensibly than to matrix micro-intuitively. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. Think dot-com. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. We will transform the term "long-term". Without ROI metrics, you will lack versioning. What does the term "systems" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our markets but our capability to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you reinvent transparently, you may have to unleash vertically. At Metafilter, we have come to know how to engage intra-ultra-extensibly. We realize that it is better to synergize iteravely than to redefine vertically. Think nano-infinitely reconfigurable. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Think six-sigma. Think web-enabled. Think out-of-the-box, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can aggregate courageously will (someday) be able to incubate fiercely. We invariably transform synergistic, clicks-and-mortar, reconfigurable, proactive mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If you iterate intuitively, you may have to synthesize iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and OWL. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be mission-critical? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for regulating unplanned-for networks?