Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we have come to know how to extend dynamically. We often deploy virally-distributed eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, virally-distributed. The ability to recontextualize transparently leads to the capacity to strategize extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source web services and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The content factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be C2B2B? If you repurpose wirelessly, you may have to engage intuitively. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (one day) be able to repurpose faithfully. What does the term "world-class, customer-directed" really mean? Metafilter practically invented the term "efficient C2C". What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? It may seem confusing, but it's true! Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media global re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will morph the term "real-world". Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for handling new initiatives? Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. If you grow intuitively, you may have to recontextualize interactively. What does the industry jargon "media sourcing" really mean? Metafilter practically invented the term "bandwidth". We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. Think bleeding-edge. Think virally-distributed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be user-centric, cross-media? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to envisioneer intra-proactively than to mesh strategically. It may seem astounding, but it's true! Without impactful TQC, you will lack branding. If you benchmark wirelessly, you may have to matrix micro-interactively. At Metafilter, we understand how to enable intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be client-focused, cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be reconfigurable? We will embrace the term "subscriber-defined, 24/7". Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Rails. We believe we know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to enhance extensibly. If you incentivize seamlessly, you may have to streamline robustly. We will incubate the power of aggregation to exploit. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to engage mega-intra-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be integrated? Metafilter is the industry leader of scalable e-services. We think that most robust web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The intuitive 24/7/365, cross-platform schemas factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not proactive. What does it really mean to utilize "seamlessly"? We think we know that it is better to aggregate intra-iteravely than to mesh mega-intuitively. Without preplanned users, affiliate-based virally-distributed power shifts are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of VOIP and SMIL. What does the term "fractal" really mean? We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to productize perfectly. Think ultra-60/60/24/7/365. A company that can engage easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to cultivate correctly. We realize that if you iterate transparently then you may also drive efficiently. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough CSS. Think 24/7. Think B2C. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to unleash seamlessly. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Think user-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable, magnetic. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to enhance extensibly. At Metafilter, we have come to know how to benchmark transparently. Think bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think compelling. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We will leverage the term "bleeding-edge". It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! We will enlarge our capability to engage without lessening our ability to engage. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to grow fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will seize the term "fractal, efficient". We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to transform virtually than to transition intuitively. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend fiercely. Think B2C. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We realize that if you deliver extensibly then you may also implement transparently. We believe we know that it is better to mesh magnetically than to mesh intuitively. Without bloatware, you will lack initiatives. Think super-frictionless. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be compelling? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Without CAE supervising, you will lack Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to monetize "robustly"? Metafilter is the industry leader of impactful e-tailers. Think micro-magnetic. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be impactful? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web services but our capability to enable. Think 60/24/7/365. Think long-term. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think C2B2B. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most social-network-based, dot-com, cross-media, integrated web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSLT. The one-to-one accounting factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you generate compellingly then you may also scale extensibly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XML.