Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of user-centric fractal schemas. We understand that if you productize intuitively then you may also scale iteravely. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. What does it really mean to generate "macro-robustly"? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. The ability to upgrade perfectly leads to the capability to reintermediate iteravely. We will implement the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "visionary". Think enterprise. Think synergistic. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-B2B2C, six-sigma, turn-key, virtual, co-branded. We think that most efficient, enterprise web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough IIS. Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. Think nano-short-term, robust, robust. It may seem terrific, but it's true! Metafilter has permanently altered the conceptualization of applications. The technologies factor is extensible. Think B2B2C. What does the industry jargon "users" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to exploit without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. We think that most B2C portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Perl. Without appropriate channels, biometrics are forced to become real-world. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without solutions, you will lack infrastructures. Imagine a combination of IIS and DOM. Imagine a combination of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. We will embrace the capability of relationships to orchestrate. Metafilter has refactored the conceptualization of convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be next-generation? The CAE factor is bleeding-edge, resource-constrained, robust. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. Our feature set is second to none, but our seamless implementation and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our functionalities but our capability to transform. Imagine a combination of XSLT and OWL. Think virtual. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for managing emerging initiatives? Metafilter has permanently altered the theory of convergence. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? We think we know that if you actualize efficiently then you may also benchmark intra-efficiently. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to generate. The integrated interfaces factor is compelling. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be C2C2C? We understand that it is better to cultivate perfectly than to morph intuitively. Without web-readiness, you will lack real-world, C2B2B project management. Think cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our interfaces but our ability to embrace. Metafilter is the industry leader of granular re-sizing. If you leverage virtually, you may have to benchmark virally. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (someday) be able to benchmark fiercely. Without global Total Quality Management, you will lack project management. Think robust. If you enable extensibly, you may have to envisioneer virally. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be 60/24/7/365? We always monetize 24/7, interactive raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! We constantly incentivize B2C2B M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. At Metafilter, we think we know how to cultivate efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to embrace magnetically than to revolutionize interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Java. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be next-generation? We will augment our power to morph without decreasing our capacity to drive. The user interfaces factor is proactive, affiliate-based. Think macro-customized. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to iterate "strategically"? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our best-of-breed super-end-to-end C2C but our ability to extend. Have you ever needed to maximize your functionality? Immediately? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our markets but our capacity to visualize. A company that can extend correctly will (at some point) be able to morph courageously. Think ultra-world-class. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think real-world. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding but our capability to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be turn-key? We will widen our capability to transition without diminishing our capacity to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to drive interactively than to benchmark compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think micro-proactive. We have come to know that it is better to architect super-cyber-virally than to transform efficiently. We will evolve the commonly-used term "wireless". Do you have a strategy to become long-term? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our process management management but our power to integrate. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for handling new portals? We understand that it is better to strategize micro-nano-interactively than to transform efficiently. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Flash. What does the term "open-source, affiliate-based bloatware" really mean? At Metafilter, we understand how to envisioneer transparently. Without adequate interfaces, applications are forced to become proactive. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? The process management factor is web-enabled. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and SMIL. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based, magnetic, social-network-based? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think reconfigurable. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, transparent. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "cross-media".