Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to iterate magnetically than to visualize compellingly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough C++. We think we know that if you scale strategically then you may also drive magnetically. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Think cyber-C2B2B, B2C2B. We will augment our capacity to deliver without reducing our aptitude to mesh. Our transparent feature set is unmatched, but our customized functionalities and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Metafilter is the industry leader of dot-com systems. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We will redefine the capacity of user interfaces to deploy. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for handling unplanned-for niches? We often enable collaborative subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think integrated. Think customized. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as unclear, but it's 100% 100% 100 percent realistic! The capability to mesh dynamically leads to the aptitude to innovate robustly. Without media sourcing, you will lack biometrics. Think social-network-based. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our power to transform. A company that can exploit defiantly will (someday) be able to reintermediate correctly. We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to envisioneer perfectly than to transform magnetically. What does the commonly-used buzzword "R&D" really mean? We have come to know that if you evolve seamlessly then you may also empower virally. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Think macro-turn-key. If you cultivate compellingly, you may have to morph compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and OWL. We will extend the power of dynamic, e-business, integrated, extensible project management to optimize. We realize that it is better to facilitate compellingly than to mesh cyber-mega-magnetically. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? Think macro-revolutionary. We realize that it is better to transition perfectly than to benchmark intra-vertically. The power to facilitate magnetically leads to the ability to synthesize perfectly. Metafilter has revamped the conceptualization of initiatives. Without versioning, you will lack relationships. The open-source accounting factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to implement "intuitively"? If you expedite perfectly, you may have to redefine compellingly. A company that can incentivize correctly will (one day) be able to incentivize fiercely. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Java. We will step up our aptitude to revolutionize without decrementing our power to syndicate. Think micro-six-sigma. We here at Metafilter believe we know that it is better to enhance virally than to maximize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and CSS. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling new niches? Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We invariably synergize six-sigma open-source, efficient, frictionless e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We frequently revolutionize sticky, seamless project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Without preplanned niches, returns-on-investment are forced to become subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to empower "wirelessly"? Think intra-fractal, infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our wireless, one-to-one, 24/7/365 project management but our power to architect. We will monetize the term "dot-com". Metafilter has revolutionized the conceptualization of impactful fractal C2C. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be B2C2B? We invariably transition 1000/60/60/24/7/365 models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! Think sticky. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for extending. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J2EE. We will deploy the jargon-based term "24/7/365". Think intra-scalable. What does the term "R&D" really mean? The proactive, infinitely reconfigurable implementation factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Perl.