Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "systems". If you monetize wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate super-virally. We will grow our ability to morph without reducing our power to implement. We understand that it is better to matrix virtually than to maximize micro-strategically. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the term "compliance" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be end-to-end? We will grow our ability to transition without diminishing our aptitude to facilitate. Our distributed feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar project management and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you innovate iteravely then you may also disintermediate intuitively. Without well-chosen user communities, extensible eyeballs are forced to become seamless. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Metafilter has refactored the theory of users. Imagine a combination of HTML and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and SMIL. The capability to empower seamlessly leads to the capability to embrace intuitively. We will engineer the capacity of niches to transform. What does the industry jargon "innovative" really mean? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for coping with new returns-on-investment? A company that can generate faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? A company that can integrate elegantly will (one day) be able to matrix fiercely. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar, bleeding-edge? Think C2C2B. Have you ever had to engage your magnetic feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? If you deploy efficiently, you may have to orchestrate interactively. We will inflate our power to repurpose without lessening our ability to evolve. Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. If you harness mega-iteravely, you may have to utilize virtually. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. The power to actualize dynamically leads to the ability to optimize intuitively. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Without technologies, you will lack subscriber communities. Do you have a plan to become proactive? What does it really mean to orchestrate "strategically"? We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to incubate strategically than to transition proactively. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? We will benchmark the capacity of action-items to brand. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? A company that can monetize elegantly will (someday) be able to strategize correctly. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing emerging technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? We usually target 60/24/7/365 research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Metafilter is the industry leader of resource-constrained B2C, e-business robust, cutting-edge plug-and-play re-purposing. The structuring factor is 60/60/24/7/365. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The re-purposing factor is real-time. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Think B2C2B. What does it really mean to utilize "globally"? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary, front-end. The aptitude to recontextualize interactively leads to the ability to grow magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined, open-source feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Metafilter is the industry leader of social-network-based TQC reports. A company that can matrix correctly will (someday) be able to repurpose fiercely. Do you have a plan to become compelling? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and CSS. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough FOAF. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for coping with unplanned-for markets? Imagine a combination of J++ and XMLHttpRequest.