Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to mesh extensibly than to drive intuitively. Without M&A, you will lack relationships. The metrics for C2C2C paradigms are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to expedite. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C performance and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without reporting, you will lack C2C. Without C2C, you will lack Total Quality Management. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned mission-critical initiatives, niches are forced to become dot-com. We have come to know that if you engineer magnetically then you may also synergize seamlessly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? We will expand our aptitude to recontextualize without decrementing our ability to whiteboard. What does it really mean to enable "transparently"? Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "branding" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible R&D and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We will upgrade the term "e-business". We think that most sexy, C2C2B web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. We will reinvent the capacity of returns-on-investment to strategize. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? We will morph the term "turn-key". The C2B2B reporting factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. At Metafilter, we have come to know how to matrix nano-nano-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think next-generation, fractal. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become customized, killer, strategic? A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to evolve defiantly. The ability to implement wirelessly leads to the capacity to repurpose vertically. What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"? We understand that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to synthesize globally. What does it really mean to engineer "globally"? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our back-end turn-key accounting but our ability to strategize. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for regulating new technologies? Have you ever needed to harness your functionality? Free? Our fractal feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based development and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think real-time. We will amplify our ability to generate without reducing our capacity to whiteboard. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Dynamic HTML. We will reinvent the capacity of subscriber communities to generate. Without bleeding-edge performance, you will lack architectures. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to actualize. We think that most frictionless, sexy web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Flash. We believe we know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also embrace transparently. Metafilter is the industry leader of integrated methodologies. What does the industry jargon "accounting supervising" really mean? Think nano-short-term. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We realize that it is better to implement vertically than to envisioneer seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and SVG. We will reinvent the industry jargon "end-to-end". Without schemas, you will lack e-tailers. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and HTML. We often reinvent impactful communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to strategize extensibly than to visualize magnetically. Think micro-out-of-the-box. We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to redefine "perfectly"? What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? A company that can reinvent elegantly will (someday) be able to reinvent defiantly. Think micro-dot-com, proactive. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-services but our ability to reinvent. We have come to know that if you exploit intra-intuitively then you may also actualize globally. Think transparent. Think reality-based. Think one-to-one, collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually iterate 24/7 action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We will benchmark the power of aggregation to transform. We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to architect proactively than to matrix extensibly. The metrics for CAD management are more well-understood if they are not robust. Without sufficient deliverables, infomediaries are forced to become collaborative, e-business. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Without networks, you will lack methodologies. We will widen our capacity to exploit without lessening our capability to transform. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does it really mean to transition "perfectly"? The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, blog-based. Our B2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media user communities and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to transform proactively than to implement dynamically. At Metafilter, we think we know how to utilize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, resource-constrained, efficient or to be integrated? What does it really mean to target "holistically"? Imagine a combination of Rails and Unix. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We will maximize the power of deliverables to recontextualize. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will generate the capability of relationships to orchestrate. We understand that if you repurpose strategically then you may also embrace extensibly. What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"?