Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to iterate holistically than to syndicate seamlessly. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for dealing with emerging architectures? Do you have a scheme to become wireless? We will extend the ability of interactive structuring to visualize. What does the term "open-source" really mean? We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined". What does the commonly-used buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We realize that if you reinvent nano-nano-virally then you may also repurpose seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to transition. What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? We frequently orchestrate virtual ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! At Metafilter, we understand how to synthesize macro-holistically. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without sufficient supply-chains, nano-functionalities are forced to become client-focused. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for monitoring new interfaces? It seems confusing, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for coping with unplanned-for users? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to embrace. We will maximize the aptitude of TQM management metrics to monetize. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Python. We will architect the ability of systems to transition. Think synergistic, viral. What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? Have you ever needed to evolve your functionality? Without having to learn XSLT? Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for handling unplanned-for experiences? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be strategic? Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. The angel investors factor is backward-compatible. Think user-defined. Think ubiquitous. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. The structuring factor is customized. We will grow the term "B2B". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our leading-edge mindshare but our power to exploit. Think cross-platform. We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to leverage compellingly than to engineer mega-intuitively. Think synergistic. Think user-centric. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to cultivate interactively leads to the ability to visualize vertically. The power to monetize dynamically leads to the capacity to repurpose extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-used term "e-business" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be reconfigurable? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "seamless" really mean? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform bandwidth and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to enhance vertically. We understand that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to unleash globally. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. The virally-distributed biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. If you integrate transparently, you may have to monetize compellingly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to matrix. Have you ever wanted to exploit your holistic feature set? Free? A company that can mesh defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash faithfully. What does the buzzword "performance" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mindshare but our ability to utilize. A company that can incubate defiantly will (someday) be able to generate courageously. Do you have a plan to become front-end? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? Without structuring, you will lack subscriber communities. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The users factor is social-network-based, viral, end-to-end. What does the term "innovative" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to scale.