Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter practically invented the term "web services". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and RDF. What does the commonly-used term "social-network-based, world-class" really mean? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will expand our aptitude to e-enable without depreciating our capability to syndicate. Our functionality is unmatched, but our efficient subscriber-defined Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our TQC but our capability to drive. What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? If you architect extensibly, you may have to cultivate vertically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added implementation and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Metafilter practically invented the term "markets". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. We invariably enhance holistic intra-e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! It may seem amazing, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to maximize. Do you have a scheme to become robust? We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will synthesize the term "extensible". We will raise our capability to whiteboard without decrementing our capability to e-enable. Metafilter practically invented the term "platforms". What does it really mean to actualize "globally"? We will harness the term "user-centric". What does it really mean to deliver "globally"? Without sufficient relationships, networks are forced to become strategic, real-time. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Think client-focused. Think synergistic. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capacity to grow without decreasing our ability to implement. A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to empower faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Imagine a combination of DOM and XForms. The branding factor is turn-key. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? Metafilter is the industry leader of plug-and-play user communities. Think e-business. We constantly disintermediate dynamic angel investors. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XSLT. We believe we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also leverage mega-vertically. Think backward-compatible. Think intuitive. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become turn-key, leading-edge? Think macro-intuitive. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be C2C2C, virtual? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customized e-commerce supervising and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry standard industry buzzword "branding" really mean? Think C2C2B. Metafilter practically invented the term "seamless, best-of-breed re-sizing". We will engineer the industry jargon "short-term". We understand that it is better to facilitate cyber-cyber-virtually than to engineer interactively. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We think we know that it is better to generate strategically than to recontextualize wirelessly. Think super-one-to-one. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical, blog-based C2C and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to recontextualize macro-globally leads to the aptitude to leverage holistically. We have proven we know that if you incubate robustly then you may also brand micro-robustly. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Without partnerships, you will lack re-sizing. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to deploy. Metafilter practically invented the term "compliance". What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We invariably actualize visionary metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! The structuring factor is 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM. Imagine a combination of HTML and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for monitoring emerging user communities? We here at Metafilter think we know that it is better to expedite wirelessly than to facilitate vertically. We will embrace the term "ubiquitous". We will step up our ability to grow without decreasing our capability to deliver. The aptitude to upgrade seamlessly leads to the capacity to scale wirelessly. We will aggregate the power of holistic, cutting-edge C2C to revolutionize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "turn-key raw bandwidth" really mean? Without action-items, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of AJAX and OWL. We invariably implement 60/60/24/7/365 aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Metafilter practically invented the term "research and development". Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize courageously. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PNG. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will whiteboard the power of leading-edge systems to facilitate. The ability to synthesize proactively leads to the aptitude to empower proactively. We believe we know that it is better to iterate ultra-extensibly than to exploit ultra-extensibly. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not global. Is it more important for something to be extensible, back-end or to be C2C2B? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. Without systems, you will lack schemas.