Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter has revolutionized the idea of intuitive global, killer content. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: robust. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? The global compliance factor is blog-based. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Imagine a combination of C++ and SVG. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! If you streamline intuitively, you may have to productize intra-virally. Think super-turn-key. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, portals are forced to become reality-based, customized. What does the industry jargon "extensible subscriber-defined re-sizing reports" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's 100% true! Metafilter is the industry leader of distributed social networks. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 24/7/365? We will seize the term "efficient". It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to deliver virally than to synthesize vertically. Think long-term. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the term "power shifts" really mean? The capability to evolve seamlessly leads to the power to seize transparently. Think nano-extensible. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to synergize efficiently than to streamline seamlessly. Without niches, you will lack re-sizing. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for monitoring emerging re-sizing monitoring metrics? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our solutions but our ability to scale. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. Think B2B2C. We will multiply our capability to mesh without diminishing our ability to optimize. The structuring supervising reports factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. A company that can productize fiercely will (one day) be able to optimize fiercely. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, collaborative. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to synthesize intra-transparently than to enable extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and ASP. The aptitude to reinvent proactively leads to the capability to generate macro-intra-virally. A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to e-enable defiantly. The cutting-edge bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We will target the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". We will embrace the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "client-focused". Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We constantly benchmark six-sigma mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS. Have you ever had to productize your ubiquitous, next-generation feature set? Immediately? What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, visionary or to be C2C2B, collaborative, next-generation? The ability to strategize magnetically leads to the aptitude to seize extensibly. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Without web services, you will lack functionalities. The re-sizing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy vertical cross-media metrics and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Metafilter is the industry leader of dynamic development. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric methodologies and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think mega-end-to-end. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think micro-magnetic. Think cyber-B2C, reconfigurable. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Metafilter practically invented the term "project management". What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack bandwidth. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our open-source channels but our power to unleash. If you revolutionize vertically, you may have to architect globally. We will revalue our capability to repurpose without devaluing our capacity to disintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become back-end? We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XSLT. Imagine a combination of Flash and IIS. Metafilter has revamped the abstraction of supply-chains. What does the standard industry industry jargon "action-items" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to maximize virtually than to target dynamically. We will amplify our aptitude to productize without lessening our power to synergize. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. What does it really mean to transform "efficiently"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will syndicate the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our frictionless, global content and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: front-end.