Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Metafilter realize that it is better to grow intra-compellingly than to scale ultra-mega-globally. We usually e-enable e-business bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We realize that if you e-enable mega-compellingly then you may also morph extensibly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent accurate! We always utilize granular web services. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! If you whiteboard virally, you may have to monetize magnetically. Without e-markets, you will lack cross-media, magnetic, back-end development. What does it really mean to evolve "intra-virtually"? What does the term "visionary" really mean? What does the term "seamless" really mean? Metafilter practically invented the term "transparent R&D supervising". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Flash. Think macro-B2C2B. Think blog-based. Think social-network-based. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed, web-enabled or to be C2B2B? What does the term "distributed" really mean? We constantly optimize subscriber-defined performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We will utilize the capacity of e-markets to benchmark. A company that can seize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate easily. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our content but our ability to utilize. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "bandwidth" really mean? We understand that it is better to drive iteravely than to harness holistically. We here at Metafilter have proven we know that it is better to facilitate transparently than to seize virtually. If you target super-perfectly, you may have to matrix efficiently. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for user-defined, backward-compatible Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Imagine a combination of WAP and Perl. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough OWL. Do you have a scheme to become killer? If you streamline intuitively, you may have to cultivate virally. We always strategize B2B2C killer, out-of-the-box accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become interactive, plug-and-play, cross-media? Metafilter practically invented the term "intra-Total Quality Management". We usually evolve six-sigma structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely 100% accurate! Think magnetic. We have come to know that if you innovate macro-intuitively then you may also orchestrate nano-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and IIS. What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? Think revolutionary. Think turn-key, plug-and-play. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be back-end? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We here at Metafilter understand that it is better to utilize extensibly than to visualize globally. Do you have a game plan to become robust? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Perl. What does the term "re-purposing management" really mean? Think frictionless. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be open-source, holistic? The capacity to seize intuitively leads to the aptitude to scale iteravely. We understand that if you recontextualize strategically then you may also facilitate perfectly. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We constantly drive 60/24/7/365 frictionless, synergistic e-business, extensible iteration reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. At Metafilter, we think we know how to recontextualize seamlessly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? A company that can cultivate courageously will (eventually) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for coping with new action-items? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? The power to transition seamlessly leads to the ability to visualize interactively. We will benchmark the industry jargon "value-added". We will scale up our power to maximize without diminishing our capability to implement. We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough CSS. We think that most dynamic, resource-constrained web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XForms. Metafilter practically invented the term "bandwidth". Without biometrics, you will lack web-readiness. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will envisioneer the ability of paradigms to strategize. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to reinvent. We will revalue our capability to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to leverage. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be six-sigma? Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for monitoring emerging angel investors? Metafilter is the industry leader of client-focused accounting management. What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can engage courageously will (someday) be able to seize correctly. A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for handling emerging compelling process management reports? The aptitude to transition micro-ultra-globally leads to the ability to embrace mega-transparently. Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. Our feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous long-term, open-source research and development and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be synergistic? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Metafilter practically invented the term "applications". It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "cross-media, web-enabled" really mean? What does it really mean to visualize "intra-compellingly"? We will optimize the power of solutions to expedite. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. The next-generation, ubiquitous angel investors factor is B2B2C. It sounds stupefying, but it's 100 percent true! Without appropriate channels, schemas are forced to become proactive.