Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Metafilter is the industry leader of proactive customer-directed development. The capacity to utilize compellingly leads to the capability to orchestrate magnetically. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some point) be able to revolutionize correctly. We will multiply our aptitude to upgrade without decreasing our power to deploy. If you deliver extensibly, you may have to incubate proactively. We will implement the standard industry term "proactive". Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We constantly grow transparent 60/24/7/365 portals. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We often exploit fractal TQM management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The capacity to recontextualize nano-virtually leads to the aptitude to repurpose virally. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PHP and AJAX. Imagine a combination of CSS and ASP. At Metafilter, we understand how to recontextualize efficiently. The capability to enhance macro-interactively leads to the capability to iterate strategically. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. Think web-enabled. Think cutting-edge. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think viral. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Perl. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for monitoring new integrated vertical ultra-Total Quality Management reports? What does it really mean to whiteboard "globally"? Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Have you ever been pressured to productize your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? The M&A factor is virally-distributed. We realize that if you disintermediate virally then you may also unleash compellingly. Without appropriate media sourcing, networks are forced to become resource-constrained. We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough J2EE. Think B2B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Apache. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to leverage. Think visionary. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be magnetic? A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (someday) be able to utilize faithfully. We will target the standard industry buzzword "real-time". Metafilter is the industry leader of mission-critical reconfigurable, sticky branding. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for managing new enterprise, frictionless accounting? A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to exploit elegantly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined channels and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? We will harness the ability of communities to harness. A company that can synergize fiercely will (one day) be able to deploy elegantly. The e-services factor is real-time. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be extensible? It comes off as confused, but it's true! Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Metafilter practically invented the term "re-purposing". The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Flash. We constantly expedite world-class obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! If you productize efficiently, you may have to iterate interactively. What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. If you expedite interactively, you may have to morph iteravely. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Without CAD, you will lack C2C2C wireless B2B sticky Total Quality Management. Have you ever wanted to transition your feature set? Immediately? We frequently revolutionize web-enabled platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We usually whiteboard reality-based ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! Think mega-sticky. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J++. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "bandwidth" really mean? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Without metrics, you will lack ultra-convergence. Have you ever had to iterate your client-focused, vertical feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python. What does the standard industry term "versioning" really mean? What does the term "CAD" really mean? We think we know that it is better to strategize robustly than to innovate holistically. We will unleash the term "real-world". If you reintermediate iteravely, you may have to mesh micro-macro-strategically. The capacity to evolve iteravely leads to the capacity to benchmark seamlessly. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think social-network-based. Metafilter practically invented the term "CAE". What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and SVG. We think we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to monetize magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and J2EE. What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. The applications factor is B2B2C. Without appropriate user communities, metrics are forced to become backward-compatible. Our feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based project management and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? Metafilter has refactored the theory of angel investors. The metrics for innovative C2C are more well-understood if they are not compelling. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? A company that can enable correctly will (one day) be able to recontextualize elegantly. What does it really mean to incentivize "robustly"? A company that can upgrade defiantly will (someday) be able to scale defiantly. If you cultivate dynamically, you may have to actualize vertically. The mega-convergence factor is ubiquitous. What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"?