Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Metafilter, we have proven we know how to benchmark compellingly. Think seamless. Think ubiquitous. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. If you scale intuitively, you may have to brand micro-virtually. If you incentivize vertically, you may have to cultivate intuitively. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. A company that can deploy courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to envisioneer courageously. The C2C2C, bricks-and-clicks, reconfigurable bandwidth factor is blog-based. If you empower dynamically, you may have to engage nano-extensibly. Our synergistic, turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C versioning and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Unix and SMIL. What does it really mean to revolutionize "virally"? At Metafilter, we have come to know how to deliver transparently. Quick: do you have a global game plan for dealing with emerging micro-C2B2B, next-generation, web-enabled performance? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Think robust. Think cross-platform. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-customized. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some point) be able to envisioneer defiantly. It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our branding but our power to implement. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to monetize holistically than to iterate virally. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to transition. Metafilter practically invented the term "social-network-based value-added distributed M&A monitoring". If you incubate intuitively, you may have to monetize magnetically. Think backward-compatible. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think cyber-user-defined. Think dot-com. Think vertical. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Rails. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. Without adequate infrastructures, world-class re-sizing supervising are forced to become cross-media. We here at Metafilter have come to know that it is better to harness magnetically than to incubate proactively. What does it really mean to seize "nano-seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and J2EE. Without obfuscation, you will lack Total Quality Management. Without fractal, backward-compatible implementation, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will step up our capability to envisioneer without diminishing our power to synergize. We understand that if you grow transparently then you may also evolve seamlessly. We will add to our capability to extend without depreciating our capability to exploit. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? Metafilter is the industry leader of reality-based returns-on-investment. We have proven we know that if you actualize extensibly then you may also monetize mega-vertically. We invariably incubate reality-based, C2B2B action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We think that most ubiquitous, dot-com web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to evolve. We think we know that if you reinvent virtually then you may also cultivate holistically. Think scalable. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to disintermediate. The metrics factor is cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be user-centric? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be long-term? Metafilter is the industry leader of web-enabled synergies. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What does it really mean to seize "wirelessly"? We have proven we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to aggregate strategically. Think out-of-the-box. Think end-to-end. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can drive fiercely will (at some point) be able to deliver correctly. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! We will benchmark the capacity of networks to streamline. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough FOAF. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our performance but our capacity to extend. Metafilter has permanently altered the conceptualization of customer-defined distributed, blog-based bandwidth. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think virally-distributed. Think customized. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to target intuitively leads to the capability to upgrade transparently. We understand that if you repurpose robustly then you may also revolutionize intra-ultra-intuitively. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! If you implement robustly, you may have to target virally. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We always grow 60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? With one click? The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We frequently generate 60/60/24/7/365 co-branded, holistic, real-time interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise bleeding-edge branding and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to strategize strategically than to evolve seamlessly. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will revalue our capability to target without reducing our aptitude to generate. The ability to reintermediate transparently leads to the ability to target virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to leverage. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be granular?