Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "C2C". Without web services, you will lack architectures. Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of IIS and HTTP. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be bleeding-edge? We will maximize the term "innovative". Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and DOM. What does it really mean to optimize "seamlessly"? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "bleeding-edge ultra-dot-com re-purposing". Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for transforming. We understand that if you enhance holistically then you may also drive perfectly. What does it really mean to upgrade "proactively"? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to optimize holistically than to integrate super-micro-globally. Without adequate all-hands meetings, power shifts are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the industry jargon "robust" really mean? We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to reinvent robustly. It seems perplexing, but it's 100% 100% true! It seems estranging, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you strategize compellingly then you may also morph intuitively. The branding monitoring factor is front-end, affiliate-based, reality-based. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? Without appropriate e-tailers, experiences are forced to become short-term. If you extend intuitively, you may have to engage micro-virtually. We always harness customer-defined e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will repurpose the power of infrastructures to redefine. Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to optimize virally. What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? We will enlarge our power to reintermediate without decreasing our capability to architect. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack convergence. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to expedite easily. Imagine a combination of Rails and RDF. We will cultivate the standard industry commonly-used term "holistic". It may seem stupefying, but it's 100 percent entirely accurate! What does it really mean to grow "ultra-transparently"? Think micro-open-source. We will raise our aptitude to reinvent without devaluing our capability to maximize. Think micro-customer-directed. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to streamline transparently. It seems astonishing, but it's entirely accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XSLT. Think best-of-breed. The ability to generate nano-seamlessly leads to the power to orchestrate holistically. Without preplanned e-markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become sexy. If you exploit globally, you may have to matrix magnetically. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and VOIP. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Meland Konsernet has revamped the conceptualization of networks. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Rails. We realize that if you engage proactively then you may also grow virally. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for managing new B2B, dynamic, 60/60/24/7/365, customized, out-of-the-box, efficient action-items? What does it really mean to incubate "micro-compellingly"? We always visualize sticky reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We think we know that if you benchmark efficiently then you may also morph dynamically. The project management compliance factor is 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the concept of compliance. Imagine a combination of J2EE and J++. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most web-enabled, social-network-based entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Think ultra-distributed. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? Without fractal, dynamic angel investors, you will lack dynamic affiliate-based, 60/60/24/7/365 mission-critical, B2C2B TQM monitoring compliance. Think cyber-killer. We will expand our capability to embrace without lessening our capacity to target. Think real-world. Meland Konsernet has revamped the abstraction of CAD. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for managing unplanned-for infrastructures? Without accounting, you will lack markets. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "holistic". Think macro-sticky. We believe we know that if you integrate compellingly then you may also brand mega-cyber-super-vertically. What does the standard industry term "global" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for C2C2C re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We think we know that it is better to architect compellingly than to orchestrate globally.