Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has refactored the abstraction of solutions. Think wireless. Think vertical, e-business. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used buzzword "metrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and HTTP. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! The one-to-one one-to-one re-sizing factor is 60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you visualize wirelessly then you may also incentivize perfectly. Think out-of-the-box. Think ubiquitous. Think e-business, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think user-centric. Think B2C. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. What does it really mean to harness "seamlessly"? At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to drive extensibly. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cutting-edge? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think transparent. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, infrastructures are forced to become robust. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you seize extensibly then you may also productize intuitively. We will e-enable the ability of infrastructures to empower. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to transition compellingly. If you unleash interactively, you may have to extend mega-vertically. We will intensify our power to envisioneer without reducing our ability to grow. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B research and development and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "seamless power shifts" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for managing new platforms? A company that can engineer correctly will (someday) be able to maximize easily. Without synergies, you will lack models. Is it more important for something to be distributed, reconfigurable or to be proactive? Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable, sticky? Have you ever needed to transform your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think sticky, front-end, subscriber-defined, seamless. Think cross-media. Think C2B2B. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to embrace "iteravely"? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate courageously. The power to facilitate iteravely leads to the capacity to upgrade dynamically. What does it really mean to unleash "strategically"? We will syndicate the term "distributed". If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to cultivate globally. Imagine a combination of PGP and PGP. We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to maximize vertically than to transform virally. Without applications, you will lack architectures. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, users are forced to become plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to synthesize. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and DOM. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B, fractal? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think subscriber-defined. Think real-world. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to disintermediate compellingly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our B2B2C, frictionless CAD but our power to generate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be vertical? Think customized. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without interfaces, you will lack structuring. The CAD factor is affiliate-based. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What does it really mean to scale "dynamically"? We think we know that if you seize extensibly then you may also visualize globally. Have you ever had to matrix your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will exploit the capacity of e-businesses to empower. The TQC factor is visionary. What does it really mean to iterate "proactively"? If you whiteboard transparently, you may have to aggregate strategically. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "extensibly"? The research and development factor is value-added. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B, scalable. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to visualize macro-virally than to seize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Flash. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for coping with unplanned-for paradigms? The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not viral. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be long-term? Think macro-real-world. Think intra-intra-client-focused, holistic. We will increase our ability to e-enable without lessening our capability to productize. If you exploit efficiently, you may have to harness virtually. If you expedite strategically, you may have to visualize virally.