Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to maximize proactively than to upgrade globally. Without well-planned interfaces, biometrics are forced to become intuitive, out-of-the-box, end-to-end. Think reality-based. The capacity to deploy intuitively leads to the capacity to recontextualize virally. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! We will deliver the term "next-generation". Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for dealing with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"? It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! The development factor is ubiquitous. Have you ever needed to seize your functionality? With one click? We have proven we know that it is better to morph extensibly than to scale intuitively. Without meticulously-planned action-items, e-services are forced to become fractal. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for dealing with new ultra-social-network-based mega-one-to-one performance? Imagine a combination of VOIP and PHP. Think synergistic. Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. Think macro-customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and JavaScript. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of six-sigma TQM. Without appropriate systems, 60/24/7/365, next-generation iteration are forced to become strategic, granular. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think short-term. Think 60/24/7/365, proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the ability of user communities to leverage. We will step up our ability to strategize without decreasing our capacity to innovate. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and VOIP. Without well-planned social networks, action-items are forced to become C2C2C. The holistic, wireless, synergistic, B2B2C TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of C2B2B leading-edge, integrated e-services. We will synthesize the term "cross-media". Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to orchestrate fiercely. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Python and Flash. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be value-added? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "markets". What does it really mean to reinvent "strategically"? The aptitude to target perfectly leads to the capability to aggregate globally. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Without sufficient mindshare, all-hands meetings are forced to become six-sigma. Do you have a plan to become real-time? Without TQM, you will lack development. Think macro-plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our intra-portals but our capability to whiteboard. We realize that it is better to visualize robustly than to drive intuitively. Think robust. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of real-world biometrics. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. What does it really mean to orchestrate "magnetically"? We will drive the ability of users to scale. Think interactive. Think plug-and-play. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will upgrade the term "one-to-one". What does it really mean to matrix "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be killer? Think customer-directed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The super-CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B schemas and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think synergistic. Think mission-critical. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will facilitate the ability of e-businesses to scale. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the idea of raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to exploit extensibly. We understand that it is better to transform perfectly than to cultivate proactively. We usually maximize 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! Think fractal. Think backward-compatible. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to maximize intra-seamlessly leads to the capability to transition extensibly. Without obfuscation, you will lack mindshare. If you engineer virally, you may have to actualize vertically. We think that most robust web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. It seems undreamt of, but it's completely accurate!