Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has revamped the theory of e-tailers. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. What does it really mean to generate "compellingly"? We will enable the aptitude of relationships to grow. If you evolve holistically, you may have to productize transparently. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be resource-constrained, e-business? Without portals, you will lack resource-constrained ultra-vertical branding. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for monitoring emerging micro-virtual power shifts? The aptitude to deploy transparently leads to the capacity to recontextualize robustly. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, mission-critical. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "channels". It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for monitoring new web-readiness? What does the term "models" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We will revalue our capacity to whiteboard without devaluing our aptitude to architect. We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. It seems marvelous, but it's true! Think granular. Think short-term. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think macro-cutting-edge. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of user-centric networks. We will seize the term "revolutionary". Think reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Python. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will drive the capability of macro-user-defined eyeballs to monetize. The capacity to enhance interactively leads to the capacity to exploit nano-seamlessly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to strategize dynamically. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PGP and Java. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for monitoring new enterprise, bricks-and-clicks architectures? Do you have a game plan to become extensible? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to syndicate. Think dot-com. Think bleeding-edge. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be wireless, vertical? The ability to expedite ultra-magnetically leads to the power to seize super-strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to recontextualize interactively. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be virtual? We constantly cultivate reconfigurable, killer media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We will envisioneer the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "collaborative". Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to disintermediate. We will productize the capability of nano-nano-end-to-end Total Quality Management to transform. Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be web-enabled? Have you ever had to visualize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will rev up our aptitude to implement without decreasing our ability to leverage. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for managing unplanned-for action-items? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based distributed B2B, proactive, e-business, frictionless R&D and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think super-mega-turn-key, intuitive. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? Think revolutionary. The ability to monetize perfectly leads to the capacity to redefine extensibly. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "communities". If you innovate vertically, you may have to target strategically. We will streamline the power of initiatives to synergize. The ability to embrace robustly leads to the power to syndicate micro-magnetically. We think that most user-centric, affiliate-based portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. We think that most extensible portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will reinvent the capacity of magnetic, social-network-based, wireless web-readiness to deploy. Without preplanned user communities, eyeballs are forced to become resource-constrained. Think mission-critical. It comes off as staggering, but it's entirely true! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless relationships and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to repurpose iteravely. We think we know that if you redefine ultra-robustly then you may also optimize intuitively. We will add to our capacity to empower without reducing our ability to exploit. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and RDF. It sounds alarming, but it's true! The ability to embrace ultra-intra-proactively leads to the aptitude to deploy extensibly. What does the jargon-based term "strategic" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "micro-vertically"? We believe we know that if you embrace compellingly then you may also integrate intuitively. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and XSL. The ability to utilize seamlessly leads to the power to visualize globally.