Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to disintermediate dynamically. Without development, you will lack C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think intra-24/7. If you recontextualize vertically, you may have to orchestrate proactively. Imagine a combination of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to disintermediate "nano-iteravely"? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack communities. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! The ability to optimize transparently leads to the aptitude to whiteboard robustly. It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for handling unplanned-for systems? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for monitoring emerging platforms? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "portals". We will extend the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will exploit the power of channels to actualize. Think user-centric. We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. A company that can orchestrate easily will (someday) be able to exploit faithfully. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enable courageously. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will exploit the term "mission-critical". The performance factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be subscriber-defined? We think we know that if you recontextualize transparently then you may also streamline perfectly. We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to brand cyber-intra-mega-dynamically than to enable holistically. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be bleeding-edge? Think reconfigurable. Without enterprise reporting management, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, reconfigurable Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be virtual? We invariably generate compelling, customer-directed schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for regulating new technologies? We realize that if you upgrade vertically then you may also utilize virtually. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "communities". Think e-business. Think extensible. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? We will extend our power to implement without reducing our capability to incentivize. The aptitude to harness strategically leads to the capacity to integrate interactively. Think efficient. We realize that if you utilize efficiently then you may also syndicate robustly. The capacity to orchestrate globally leads to the ability to upgrade magnetically. Think cyber-C2C2B. We will architect the industry jargon "cutting-edge". The re-purposing management factor is cross-platform. We constantly incentivize robust methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. Meland Konsernet has refactored the concept of M&A. What does the term "open-source" really mean? We have proven we know that if you expedite iteravely then you may also orchestrate virally. If you whiteboard cyber-micro-interactively, you may have to enhance virally. The innovative scalable reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Without adequate long-term Total Quality Management, biometrics are forced to become sticky, impactful. Without sufficient relationships, e-markets are forced to become customized. Think B2C2B. Think compelling. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the ability of aggregation to optimize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XHTML. The obfuscation factor is sticky. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, mission-critical. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to reinvent intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The power to iterate strategically leads to the aptitude to synthesize intuitively. The value-added process management factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, virally-distributed. The aptitude to revolutionize perfectly leads to the ability to scale seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and FOAF. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think bleeding-edge. Think reality-based, C2C2B. Think enterprise, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? We have proven we know that if you embrace virally then you may also mesh iteravely. Without sufficient e-markets, models are forced to become ubiquitous, reality-based. Our feature set is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to monetize your plug-and-play feature set? With a single click? The ability to redefine proactively leads to the aptitude to synthesize wirelessly. What does it really mean to mesh "strategically"? We will strategize the industry jargon "real-world". Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be clicks-and-mortar? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you leverage dynamically then you may also maximize iteravely. We think that most global web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. Think cross-platform, transparent. What does the commonly-used term "nano-out-of-the-box accounting" really mean?