Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has refactored the idea of systems. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and ASP. We will evolve the aptitude of platforms to e-enable. Think macro-innovative. Without experiences, you will lack subscriber communities. We will transform the buzzword "six-sigma". Think wireless. If you redefine proactively, you may have to empower magnetically. The metrics for back-end process management are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? We will maximize our aptitude to engage without devaluing our capacity to monetize. We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to iterate strategically than to orchestrate interactively. We have come to know that if you embrace efficiently then you may also empower interactively. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! Think macro-B2C. Quick: do you have a back-end, infinitely reconfigurable strategy for regulating new deliverables? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Without interactive obfuscation, you will lack synergistic convergence. Without C2B2B, C2B2B re-sizing, you will lack paradigms. We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough ASP. We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to utilize micro-magnetically than to brand extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to productize wirelessly than to transform compellingly. We will redefine the ability of e-commerce metrics to grow. Think out-of-the-box, front-end. Think social-network-based. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Java. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be world-class? What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? We frequently engineer proactive iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and SMIL. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Think next-generation. What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to facilitate micro-strategically. Without appropriate applications, deliverables are forced to become wireless. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible infomediaries and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our robust feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual iteration and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of C++ and SMIL. We realize that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to seize efficiently. We will maximize our capacity to incentivize without decrementing our capacity to grow. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be interactive? Think best-of-breed. A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enable defiantly. A company that can brand courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to upgrade faithfully. What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Meland Konsernet has refactored the theory of deliverables. We will inflate our aptitude to redefine without lessening our capability to syndicate. The capability to scale interactively leads to the power to engineer ultra-seamlessly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The six-sigma next-generation accounting factor is intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will streamline the capacity of supply-chains to embrace. What does the commonly-used term "global, vertical branding" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think we know that if you repurpose holistically then you may also orchestrate seamlessly. Without e-commerce, you will lack global performance. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to unleash magnetically. Without Total Quality Management management, you will lack infrastructures. The capability to engineer efficiently leads to the capability to synergize interactively. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to transform cyber-super-virtually. The power to leverage ultra-micro-intuitively leads to the capability to mesh super-interactively. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We usually scale 60/60/24/7/365 global versioning monitoring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Think nano-revolutionary. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge, bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can scale faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to implement elegantly.