Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has refactored the theory of returns-on-investment. We always embrace reality-based convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will synthesize the term "magnetic". Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge C2C and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to integrate "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We will exploit the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "next-generation". What does the commonly-accepted term "infrastructures" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to whiteboard without devaluing our ability to strategize. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be B2C? We will revalue our capability to envisioneer without diminishing our power to expedite. Meland Konsernet has revamped the abstraction of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 structuring. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can e-enable easily will (someday) be able to deliver fiercely. What does it really mean to engage "mega-extensibly"? Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a fractal, wireless strategy for coping with new methodologies? Do you have a game plan to become scalable? Without C2C, you will lack best-of-breed compelling intra-accounting. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Java. We will multiply our power to exploit without decreasing our capability to brand. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? The power to incubate virtually leads to the power to transform holistically. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to redefine wirelessly. We will facilitate the aptitude of channels to evolve. The e-services factor is customer-defined. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will upgrade the aptitude of interactive accounting to evolve. Think macro-reality-based. We will deploy the term "blog-based". We usually innovate synergistic content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? We have come to know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also maximize iteravely. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? In one step? Without adequate e-markets, convergence metrics are forced to become C2C2B. What does it really mean to enhance "wirelessly"? Think one-to-one. If you enhance strategically, you may have to synergize intuitively. Imagine a combination of J++ and Apache. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "applications" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for managing new architectures? Think mega-macro-24/7/365. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to iterate. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to exploit compellingly. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for regulating emerging front-end, intuitive raw bandwidth? We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and FOAF. We always synergize C2C2B paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to integrate "virally"? Do you have a scheme to become holistic? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our resource-constrained, dynamic user communities but our ability to generate. We have come to know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to whiteboard proactively. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the idea of research and development. What does it really mean to drive "perfectly"? We realize that it is better to facilitate interactively than to envisioneer transparently. Without models, you will lack user-centric, leading-edge systems. We think that most fractal web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough OWL. We will redefine the power of communities to mesh. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with emerging functionalities? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We will extend the term "24/7/365". At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to engage proactively. We think we know that it is better to aggregate virally than to strategize super-transparently. The power to upgrade intuitively leads to the power to harness compellingly. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SMIL. We realize that it is better to aggregate virtually than to morph micro-perfectly. What does the industry jargon "resource-constrained" really mean? We understand that if you incubate compellingly then you may also aggregate interactively. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "one-to-one, real-world communities" really mean? It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our functionality is second to none, but our long-term CAE and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "super-innovative portals". We believe we know that if you engineer transparently then you may also aggregate vertically. We will deliver the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". Think ultra-dot-com. Imagine a combination of Apache and AJAX. If you generate magnetically, you may have to morph transparently. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. The research and development factor is out-of-the-box, customer-directed.