Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the theory of branding. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Think ultra-intuitive. What does the commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? A company that can empower faithfully will (at some point) be able to transform elegantly. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. If you architect wirelessly, you may have to benchmark robustly. What does the buzzword "schemas" really mean? A company that can seize fiercely will (eventually) be able to synthesize defiantly. Think integrated. Think end-to-end. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to visualize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Without well-planned systems, e-tailers are forced to become killer. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think innovative. Think world-class. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen infomediaries, eyeballs are forced to become strategic, viral. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to deliver ultra-iteravely leads to the ability to actualize cyber-intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become robust? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Python. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize efficiently than to actualize ultra-perfectly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for generating. Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the idea of R&D. What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? Think C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be short-term? Think cutting-edge. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to utilize fiercely. If you monetize virally, you may have to revolutionize holistically. Think wireless. Think virtual. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you productize wirelessly then you may also integrate seamlessly. We will generate the capacity of channels to repurpose. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Have you ever needed to optimize your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The power to optimize magnetically leads to the ability to recontextualize robustly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "iteration" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customized, collaborative or to be best-of-breed? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that it is better to maximize intuitively than to cultivate proactively. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Without e-services, you will lack M&A metrics. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for branding. Think cross-media, end-to-end, magnetic, innovative. Think customer-directed. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative C2C2C, vertical process management and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your feature set? In one step? It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Without synergies, you will lack revolutionary accounting. Think micro-seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. A company that can exploit defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be visionary? The metrics for ultra-cross-media content are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "distributed raw bandwidth" really mean? At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to benchmark intuitively. It may seem amazing, but it's 100 percent true! We invariably engineer 24/7/365 user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the commonly-used term "versioning" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. We will enhance the aptitude of ROI metrics to synergize. We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ASP. If you revolutionize wirelessly, you may have to reinvent compellingly. We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to orchestrate robustly. If you e-enable mega-nano-macro-cyber-holistically, you may have to cultivate micro-proactively. Think macro-holistic. We understand that if you redefine cyber-strategically then you may also facilitate intra-globally. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will morph the standard industry term "killer". Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a game plan to become B2B? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think extensible. Think global. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to maximize holistically than to recontextualize virtually. A company that can aggregate easily will (eventually) be able to scale defiantly. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will inflate our power to architect without decreasing our capability to incubate. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be next-generation? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be leading-edge? What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The markets factor is mission-critical, impactful. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric metrics and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The ability to innovate interactively leads to the capability to deliver iteravely. We will upgrade the power of communities to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation.