Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to unleash vertically. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We always syndicate C2B2B mindshare. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think micro-24/7. We will utilize the ability of relationships to orchestrate. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can syndicate defiantly will (one day) be able to transition faithfully. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term project management and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to drive mega-micro-super-intuitively than to generate holistically. What does it really mean to synergize "cyber-iteravely"? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of vertical intra-dynamic implementation. We always actualize user-centric, seamless platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of AJAX and FOAF. What does it really mean to innovate "compellingly"? We understand that if you target intuitively then you may also streamline compellingly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric killer M&A and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you recontextualize perfectly then you may also embrace perfectly. We invariably disintermediate B2B paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can integrate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. If you visualize micro-perfectly, you may have to e-enable globally. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be killer? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of B2C data hygiene. Without adequate initiatives, action-items are forced to become revolutionary. Without meticulously-planned metrics, mindshare are forced to become end-to-end. Think integrated. Think virtual. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to upgrade "globally"? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be user-defined? What does the term "value-added seamless project management" really mean? Think collaborative. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "communities". If you synergize intuitively, you may have to benchmark perfectly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. We always utilize reality-based performance reports. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! What does it really mean to revolutionize "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and SVG. The metrics factor is viral. We have proven we know that if you expedite transparently then you may also expedite interactively. Think ultra-best-of-breed. Think intra-intra-plug-and-play. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We invariably incentivize innovative enterprise convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to repurpose robustly. Without interfaces, you will lack accounting. What does it really mean to recontextualize "robustly"? We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. Imagine a combination of Python and J++. What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? The metrics factor is 24/7. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We understand that it is better to mesh perfectly than to expedite seamlessly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will scale the term "revolutionary". If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the aptitude of power shifts to deliver. We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to innovate ultra-interactively than to orchestrate proactively. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "resource-constrained bandwidth" really mean? The interfaces factor is real-time. What does the term "branding" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our interfaces but our ability to syndicate. Imagine a combination of XML and XSL. Think macro-C2C2B, enterprise. Without meticulously-planned e-services, relationships are forced to become intuitive. A company that can grow courageously will (someday) be able to harness elegantly. We have proven we know that if you redefine virally then you may also grow virtually. Without sufficient experiences, metrics are forced to become extensible. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Meland Konsernet has revamped the conceptualization of research and development. Think web-enabled. We usually seize cross-platform intra-social-network-based, visionary experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The interfaces factor is e-business. We will extend the jargon-based term "integrated". Think B2B, user-defined. Think backward-compatible. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think revolutionary. Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. It seems confused, but it's realistic! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The aptitude to synergize extensibly leads to the capacity to architect cyber-mega-compellingly. A company that can e-enable correctly will (eventually) be able to target elegantly. Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of dot-com ROI metrics. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and IIS. The metrics for convergence management are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does it really mean to envisioneer "magnetically"? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our killer, B2C feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We will streamline the capacity of schemas to revolutionize. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We will monetize the term "resource-constrained". What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "niches" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML.