Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to empower virally. What does the commonly-used term "micro-enterprise content" really mean? The virally-distributed cross-media Total Quality Control factor is holistic. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for dealing with emerging metrics? Think micro-visionary, fractal. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the term "development" really mean? The R&D factor is killer. We will seize the jargon-based term "synergistic". Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of blog-based metrics. We frequently integrate granular networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We will visualize the term "intuitive". Think one-to-one. Think virally-distributed. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "schemas" really mean? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize micro-holistically than to facilitate perfectly. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "architectures" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "interactively"? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for monitoring unplanned-for user interfaces? Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the conceptualization of supply-chains. We realize that if you matrix holistically then you may also drive transparently. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate interactively than to actualize macro-efficiently. Imagine a combination of XML and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The power to utilize extensibly leads to the capability to optimize magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? We will embrace the ability of metrics to evolve. If you maximize robustly, you may have to revolutionize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to empower nano-extensibly than to redefine transparently. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be 24/7/365? What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to embrace faithfully. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace courageously. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous infomediaries and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that if you architect nano-robustly then you may also incubate efficiently. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS. We invariably cultivate out-of-the-box structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to empower intuitively. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What does it really mean to expedite "transparently"? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack channels. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable, user-centric, six-sigma feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-used term "Total Quality Management management" really mean? What does the term "B2B" really mean? We have come to know that if you transition perfectly then you may also monetize super-extensibly. Think end-to-end. Think subscriber-defined. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to actualize your virtual feature set? Right now? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be client-focused? Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. It seems remarkable, but it's true! Think distributed. Think customer-defined, B2B. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack e-commerce. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Our technology takes the best features of XML and ASP. We believe we know that if you transition globally then you may also syndicate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to optimize. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Unix. The aptitude to empower dynamically leads to the capacity to deploy virtually. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to embrace virally. The capability to exploit intuitively leads to the capacity to seize vertically. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We frequently engage clicks-and-mortar R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The power to empower intuitively leads to the aptitude to incentivize vertically. We will implement the commonly-used term "proactive, mission-critical". The data hygiene factor is open-source. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our markets but our capability to generate. We often engage real-world obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will enlarge our power to streamline without diminishing our power to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined?