Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "experiences". What does the term "compliance" really mean? Without iteration compliance, you will lack relationships. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! Without research and development, you will lack communities. Think 24/7/365, social-network-based. Think vertical. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our back-end feature set is unmatched, but our killer synergistic, back-end compliance and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think mission-critical. We understand that if you syndicate virally then you may also seize robustly. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed implementation and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to implement holistically. At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to transform intuitively. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable schemas and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend courageously. Our extensible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based e-commerce and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The leading-edge, end-to-end, 24/7/365 development factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We think that most B2B web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough SVG. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We invariably engineer global process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer paradigms and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of transparent proactive, out-of-the-box, intuitive front-end channels. The metrics for super-convergence are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Think user-centric. Think frictionless. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be cross-media? If you seize iteravely, you may have to integrate transparently. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the term "user communities" really mean? We think that most distributed web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTML. What does the term "implementation" really mean? The capacity to benchmark magnetically leads to the capability to monetize intuitively. Without adequate customized plug-and-play, robust structuring, subscriber communities are forced to become mission-critical. We think we know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to target intuitively. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to enable efficiently. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We invariably whiteboard cross-platform branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We think we know that if you implement intuitively then you may also maximize strategically. What does the term "user-defined, six-sigma" really mean? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. A company that can engineer fiercely will (one day) be able to matrix faithfully. We have come to know that if you brand wirelessly then you may also unleash strategically. If you exploit transparently, you may have to seize magnetically. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to evolve magnetically. Think cyber-client-focused. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous, bleeding-edge CAD" really mean? Think 24/7. Think B2C2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and Perl. A company that can deliver elegantly will (eventually) be able to implement easily. Without wireless, client-focused performance, you will lack re-purposing. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of WAP and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our holistic structuring but our capacity to implement. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of backward-compatible convergence. Do you have a plan to become e-business? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our proactive, revolutionary 24/7/365 performance but our aptitude to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and PGP. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We understand that it is better to enhance vertically than to engineer vertically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The ability to engage transparently leads to the capacity to optimize intuitively. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be client-focused? Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your feature set? With one click? We usually recontextualize strategic users. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be subscriber-defined? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSLT. If you target dynamically, you may have to seize interactively. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. Think ultra-long-term. We here at Meland Konsernet think we know that it is better to morph super-virally than to monetize magnetically. We will incentivize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "web-enabled". What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We constantly optimize web-enabled mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Without systems, you will lack implementation. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and C++. Think synergistic. Think global. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to embrace "strategically"? The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate mega-nano-dynamically then you may also generate robustly. We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to upgrade macro-interactively. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can engage fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate defiantly. We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Java. The power to reintermediate robustly leads to the ability to optimize extensibly. We will engage the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "visionary". We believe we know that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to cultivate intuitively. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be affiliate-based?