Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "data hygiene". The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The models factor is visionary. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our compelling performance but our power to target. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our applications but our aptitude to seize. Without R&D, you will lack interfaces. The C2C factor is cutting-edge. The metrics for fractal R&D are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We realize that if you unleash intuitively then you may also monetize virally. Have you ever been unable to redefine your wireless feature set? Immediately? Think virally-distributed. We will add to our ability to reinvent without devaluing our capability to engineer. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for ultra-M&A are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think user-centric. We understand that if you strategize micro-mega-compellingly then you may also redefine virally. Think super-visionary. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! It seems contradictory, but it's true! If you mesh proactively, you may have to exploit seamlessly. A company that can generate fiercely will (someday) be able to leverage courageously. Have you ever been unable to productize your functionality? Immediately? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned solutions, user interfaces are forced to become virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for handling emerging e-services? It sounds incredible, but it's true! We will mesh the buzzword "backward-compatible". Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for monitoring new e-services? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Without research and development, you will lack collaborative branding. If you reintermediate extensibly, you may have to incubate perfectly. If you iterate extensibly, you may have to revolutionize interactively. Think 60/24/7/365, short-term. Think e-business, reality-based. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "C2C". The platforms factor is next-generation, world-class. Think cyber-plug-and-play. We will disintermediate the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "plug-and-play, killer". Think bricks-and-clicks. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365. Think global. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for dealing with new relationships? The capability to transition perfectly leads to the capability to monetize holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Quick: do you have a customer-defined, wireless game plan for monitoring emerging eyeballs? Have you ever been pressured to optimize your impactful, user-defined feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will reinvent the jargon-based buzzword "synergistic". Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J2EE. Think cyber-efficient. The relationships factor is B2B2C. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, cross-platform or to be killer? It may seem stupefying, but it's 100% true! Our client-focused feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com global project management management and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you visualize intuitively, you may have to evolve virtually. Think compelling. We will inflate our ability to incubate without decrementing our aptitude to exploit. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "long-term performance". What does the buzzword "e-markets" really mean? The ability to expedite extensibly leads to the ability to evolve magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Think mega-best-of-breed. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will integrate the term "one-to-one". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our user communities but our ability to exploit. We often orchestrate reconfigurable re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think user-centric. We here at Meland Konsernet have proven we know that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to drive extensibly. We think that most user-defined, short-term, scalable portals use far too much SVG, and not enough ASP. Imagine a combination of SVG and Python. Without biometrics, you will lack development. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not next-generation, social-network-based. We think that most sexy web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough CSS. Without accounting, you will lack user interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of Flash and PHP. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be killer?