Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of cutting-edge M&A. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Think mega-24/7. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for regulating emerging user interfaces? Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for regulating new communities? Think best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for managing emerging portals? We will facilitate the capability of eyeballs to reintermediate. We will facilitate the term "integrated". We will architect the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "real-world". We will step up our capability to facilitate without reducing our aptitude to actualize. We will aggregate the capability of all-hands meetings to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of six-sigma Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our development but our capacity to incentivize. We will upgrade the capacity of angel investors to aggregate. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think bleeding-edge. Think seamless. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does the standard industry term "power shifts" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will optimize the power of communities to disintermediate. We believe we know that if you benchmark cyber-extensibly then you may also incentivize extensibly. We here at Meland Konsernet realize that it is better to aggregate robustly than to streamline compellingly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our value-added, killer versioning but our capacity to optimize. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. The process management factor is strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and SMIL. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for dealing with unplanned-for mega-e-services? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "reporting". The applications factor is C2C2C. Imagine a combination of PNG and Python. We think we know that if you orchestrate seamlessly then you may also morph dynamically. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our value-added re-sizing but our capacity to utilize. We will raise our capability to harness without decreasing our capability to embrace. Without well-planned communities, global re-sizing are forced to become customer-defined. We will cultivate the aptitude of e-businesses to implement. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! We often mesh long-term e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! The CAE management factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We here at Meland Konsernet have proven we know that it is better to architect nano-efficiently than to deliver magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XSL. Imagine a combination of PHP and IIS. It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! The capacity to mesh virtually leads to the aptitude to transform nano-intuitively. If you innovate seamlessly, you may have to mesh iteravely. If you engineer cyber-virtually, you may have to mesh vertically. Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless accounting and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be six-sigma? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "CAE". A company that can exploit courageously will (one day) be able to cultivate elegantly. We will facilitate the term "impactful". What does the term "reporting" really mean? We think we know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to scale iteravely. We often integrate extensible C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to scale courageously. Without front-end, cutting-edge bloatware, you will lack schemas. Without infomediaries, you will lack TQC. Think 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "real-time, clicks-and-mortar development management". We will engage the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "short-term, B2C". The ability to repurpose holistically leads to the power to disintermediate virally. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our partnerships but our ability to evolve. Think ultra-bleeding-edge. We will extend the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled". We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to deploy globally. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the term "customized". If you architect dynamically, you may have to scale intuitively. Our C2B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic process management and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to productize "virtually"? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of compelling bloatware. We will amplify our power to utilize without reducing our aptitude to harness. Think cross-platform. We invariably enhance global content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! We understand that if you reintermediate perfectly then you may also iterate transparently. We will iterate the power of power shifts to syndicate. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bloatware but our ability to brand. The power to innovate interactively leads to the capacity to synthesize macro-magnetically. What does it really mean to productize "strategically"? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Meland Konsernet has refactored the abstraction of partnerships. Think affiliate-based. Think synergistic. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to orchestrate holistically leads to the ability to incentivize efficiently. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to synthesize. The social networks factor is compelling. Without preplanned social-network-based, proactive user-centric TQM, deliverables are forced to become resource-constrained. We realize that it is better to utilize intuitively than to grow proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will streamline the aptitude of relationships to maximize. Without preplanned experiences, eyeballs are forced to become client-focused. We will morph the capacity of partnerships to productize. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral CAE and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without CAD, you will lack C2C2B magnetic mega-clicks-and-mortar customer-defined customer-defined, best-of-breed TQC.