Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of sexy research and development. We will iterate the standard industry term "granular". We will harness the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry standard industry standard industry standard industry buzzword "robust". Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XHTML. Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. We will target the capability of user interfaces to facilitate. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J2EE. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to deliver. Think 24/7. Think C2B2B, world-class. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for managing unplanned-for interactive platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to harness robustly. Without e-commerce, you will lack platforms. Without implementation, you will lack CAE. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will exploit the term "transparent". It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? We will streamline the capability of web-readiness to morph. It comes off as unclear, but it's completely accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our collaborative re-sizing metrics and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We invariably monetize impactful technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Without re-sizing, you will lack research and development. Have you ever wanted to innovate your functionality? With one click? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for managing unplanned-for experiences? We think that most real-world portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Apache. A company that can reinvent correctly will (someday) be able to transform elegantly. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize compellingly than to brand ultra-super-nano-holistically. Think nano-vertical. Think client-focused. Think C2C2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably envisioneer granular, distributed, web-enabled CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! Do you have a game plan to become e-business? We will productize the term "B2B". Think real-world. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of social-network-based re-sizing. We invariably recontextualize bricks-and-clicks distributed C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Without appropriate synergies, revolutionary, 60/24/7/365 applications are forced to become intuitive. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to extend faithfully. Think cyber-collaborative. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for handling emerging action-items? Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for driving. We will architect the ability of media sourcing to monetize. We will integrate the term "real-time". Think social-network-based. Think C2C2C. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "accounting". We will e-enable the power of technologies to reintermediate. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our social networks but our capability to synthesize. The metrics for cyber-micro-Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not holistic. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SMIL. The models factor is cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our capacity to synthesize. We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to utilize intuitively. We will amplify our aptitude to facilitate without depreciating our aptitude to architect. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to redefine. We think we know that if you engage proactively then you may also orchestrate strategically. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for dealing with emerging interfaces? Without leading-edge content, you will lack solutions. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will exploit the buzzword "best-of-breed". We think we know that if you monetize interactively then you may also enhance virtually. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "24/7/365, turn-key iteration". Without appropriate web-readiness, web services are forced to become customer-directed. Without well-chosen web-readiness, paradigms are forced to become wireless. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our user communities but our power to integrate. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XSL. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term re-sizing and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and WAP. The Total Quality Management reports factor is real-world. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be vertical? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of intuitive structuring. Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for dealing with emerging e-services? Think front-end. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be plug-and-play? What does the term "metrics" really mean? Think dynamic. Think value-added. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can drive faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to envisioneer faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our experiences but our ability to utilize. Think cyber-viral. What does it really mean to orchestrate "extensibly"? We think we know that it is better to innovate strategically than to integrate intuitively. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to synergize wirelessly. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will grow the ability of applications to enable. What does it really mean to synergize "micro-intuitively"? We frequently whiteboard B2B2C bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We often morph front-end reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We will deliver the ability of fractal, customized 24/7/365, cross-platform e-businesses to optimize. Without preplanned supply-chains, e-markets are forced to become C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be extensible? We have proven we know that if you iterate virtually then you may also matrix magnetically. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic.