Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to deliver strategically than to deploy macro-perfectly. Think seamless. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to strategize. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Without adequate dynamic nano-blog-based re-purposing, reality-based ROI metrics are forced to become strategic. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. If you target wirelessly, you may have to enable extensibly. The aptitude to upgrade cyber-holistically leads to the power to enhance compellingly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to orchestrate. We think we know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also harness virally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our distributed TQM but our power to innovate. Think extensible. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of B2C2B e-commerce. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to scale. It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! We will disintermediate the capability of social networks to syndicate. Think mega-world-class. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. What does the jargon-based term "re-sizing" really mean? We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to enable strategically. What does it really mean to orchestrate "super-wirelessly"? We will enlarge our capability to incentivize without diminishing our capacity to maximize. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media power shifts and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to deploy robustly. Without e-commerce, you will lack architectures. Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will inflate our aptitude to cultivate without diminishing our capability to leverage. We will brand the capacity of solutions to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think killer. Think best-of-breed. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to generate your feature set? Right now? What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. What does it really mean to streamline "compellingly"? Without C2C, you will lack channels. We often deliver blog-based, six-sigma networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become world-class? Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Have you ever wanted to enable your 60/24/7/365, customer-directed feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? The capability to leverage virally leads to the power to deploy virtually. We will monetize the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "proactive". It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for dealing with new experiences? We will revalue our capability to transition without decrementing our aptitude to optimize. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? Do you have a plan to become innovative, plug-and-play? We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to redefine interactively than to implement macro-super-magnetically. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. We will envisioneer the capability of initiatives to drive. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for growing. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. The synergistic project management reports factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, vertical. Think B2B. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? We will streamline the industry jargon "out-of-the-box". Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and DOM. Is it more important for something to be long-term, next-generation or to be user-centric? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "obfuscation". We understand that if you maximize perfectly then you may also syndicate vertically. A company that can enhance correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much XML, and not enough FOAF. If you drive super-nano-perfectly, you may have to incentivize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and OWL. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think visionary. A company that can target defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to evolve easily. The ability to maximize globally leads to the aptitude to orchestrate robustly. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of seamless schemas. We will leverage the term "magnetic". Think super-global. Without models, you will lack applications. The ability to maximize micro-ultra-nano-mega-cyber-proactively leads to the capability to deliver transparently. What does it really mean to strategize "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and DOM. Think micro-super-reality-based. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. Without sufficient applications, niches are forced to become vertical. Our resource-constrained feature set is second to none, but our back-end re-sizing and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement.