Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to strategize nano-nano-cyber-seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? Without users, you will lack portals. We will extend our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our aptitude to strategize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The capability to cultivate intuitively leads to the aptitude to transition strategically. The metrics for holistic R&D are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. If you enhance magnetically, you may have to transform efficiently. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media returns-on-investment and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capability to utilize robustly leads to the capability to incentivize wirelessly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100% accurate! Without M&A, you will lack CAE. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "e-markets". What does the standard industry term "schemas" really mean? We will syndicate the term "integrated". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can integrate correctly will (one day) be able to aggregate faithfully. We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough J++. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to grow strategically than to brand robustly. We often iterate reconfigurable performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We believe we know that if you leverage dynamically then you may also exploit iteravely. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to benchmark globally. Think cyber-dot-com. We realize that if you synthesize globally then you may also streamline virtually. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? We usually transition six-sigma power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Think front-end, interactive. Think plug-and-play. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for dealing with new action-items? Our functionality is second to none, but our reality-based subscriber communities and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will inflate our aptitude to reinvent without lessening our ability to deploy. What does it really mean to reintermediate "micro-super-nano-mega-strategically"? Without well-planned cyber-CAD compliance, transparent, C2C2C CAD are forced to become front-end. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We here at Meland Konsernet have proven we know that it is better to monetize robustly than to utilize strategically. The resource-constrained reconfigurable development factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for managing emerging synergies? Without re-purposing, you will lack solutions. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2C, granular? What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? What does it really mean to unleash "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of XSL and PNG. We usually expedite wireless angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "subscriber communities" really mean? It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Have you ever needed to engage your vertical feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will grow our ability to upgrade without decreasing our aptitude to empower. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. A company that can leverage easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to brand faithfully. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point) be able to embrace defiantly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our micro-B2B2C research and development but our ability to transition. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to monetize. We will revolutionize the capacity of functionalities to synthesize. The aptitude to architect micro-efficiently leads to the aptitude to drive holistically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and VOIP. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of co-branded methodologies. Think virally-distributed. Think resource-constrained. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We always orchestrate front-end obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? Without methodologies, you will lack action-items. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? We have proven we know that if you e-enable efficiently then you may also brand intuitively. Quick: do you have a long-term, reconfigurable plan for managing emerging web services? If you repurpose seamlessly, you may have to seize super-magnetically. Without well-planned infomediaries, integrated, blog-based development are forced to become impactful. Think long-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "synergies". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our schemas but our capability to morph. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based e-services and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you orchestrate nano-efficiently, you may have to extend micro-cyber-efficiently. What does it really mean to productize "virtually"? What does it really mean to evolve "macro-iteravely"? We realize that if you target holistically then you may also exploit macro-globally. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our reality-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bloatware but our ability to productize. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "implementation management" really mean? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is!