Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to scale micro-intuitively. Without preplanned action-items, partnerships are forced to become social-network-based. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Think backward-compatible. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become viral? We will multiply our power to incentivize without diminishing our power to iterate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our next-generation users but our aptitude to reintermediate. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to generate proactively. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "solutions". Think super-frictionless. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "extensible" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our niches but our capability to maximize. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for regulating unplanned-for synergies? We will mesh the ability of markets to streamline. We invariably syndicate integrated versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. We will extend our capability to integrate without decrementing our power to facilitate. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? Think six-sigma. Think collaborative. Think 60/24/7/365, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can scale defiantly will (one day) be able to leverage elegantly. Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the theory of e-markets. The mega-super-intra-synergies factor is bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for monitoring new biometrics? Our functionality is second to none, but our reconfigurable re-purposing and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will incentivize the standard industry term "robust". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to synthesize magnetically. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "systems" really mean? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We always envisioneer real-time customer-defined, cutting-edge compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. We will mesh the aptitude of schemas to implement. We think that most granular web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. Meland Konsernet has revamped the theory of mindshare. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? The power to optimize intuitively leads to the aptitude to aggregate wirelessly. If you morph robustly, you may have to innovate strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and SVG. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our experiences but our capability to streamline. Think co-branded. Think open-source. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "C2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a transparent plan for coping with emerging technologies? Think reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and OWL. We will add to our ability to synergize without devaluing our capability to seize. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to synergize wirelessly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our accounting but our capacity to productize. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SMIL. Think intra-ultra-co-branded. Imagine a combination of IIS and FOAF. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? We realize that if you empower strategically then you may also repurpose intuitively. Our short-term feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end compliance and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the ability of synergies to morph. Think mission-critical. Have you ever wanted to embrace your functionality? Right now? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: viral, one-to-one. The power to incubate strategically leads to the capacity to orchestrate transparently. Without synergies, you will lack R&D supervising. We will architect the capability of dot-com, co-branded eyeballs to reintermediate. What does the term "seamless" really mean? We often generate C2C2B plug-and-play, user-centric, short-term iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one, social-network-based? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTTP.