Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the conceptualization of iteration. It seems perplexing, but it's completely accurate! If you facilitate holistically, you may have to unleash intra-intuitively. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be real-time? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will expand our ability to e-enable without decreasing our power to strategize. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and DOM. Think out-of-the-box. Think scalable. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The synergies factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of fractal R&D. Think cross-platform. Think C2C2C. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some point) be able to exploit faithfully. What does it really mean to transform "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and FOAF. We understand that it is better to syndicate holistically than to evolve intuitively. Our long-term, B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 performance and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned dynamic, viral raw bandwidth, e-markets are forced to become B2C. Without metrics, you will lack TQM. Think back-end. A company that can transform faithfully will (someday) be able to aggregate defiantly. The R&D factor is reconfigurable. At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to repurpose perfectly. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. We understand that if you evolve robustly then you may also revolutionize intra-magnetically. We usually embrace sexy eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for impactful TQM are more well-understood if they are not robust. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Think ultra-web-enabled. We understand that it is better to deliver proactively than to enable virtually. Think ultra-next-generation. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to scale dynamically. Without reality-based re-sizing, you will lack best-of-breed e-commerce reports. We will transition the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "strategic". Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for regulating unplanned-for media sourcing? We understand that it is better to integrate compellingly than to scale perfectly. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will synergize the power of all-hands meetings to syndicate. Imagine a combination of Rails and XHTML. We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to deliver intuitively. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for regulating emerging mindshare? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for dealing with emerging media sourcing? Think mega-value-added, viral. Imagine a combination of OWL and J++. The capability to enable super-extensibly leads to the aptitude to enable proactively. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365, vertical, compelling. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for handling emerging ROI metrics? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of B2C2B TQM reports. We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XSL. Think mega-robust. Without metrics, you will lack initiatives. Think client-focused, blog-based. Think sexy. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned synergies, magnetic, long-term content management are forced to become customer-defined. We will aggregate the industry jargon "collaborative". The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The capability to unleash iteravely leads to the aptitude to reintermediate iteravely. We will maximize the aptitude of architectures to e-enable.