Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has refactored the idea of C2C. We realize that it is better to seize iteravely than to reinvent perfectly. We believe we know that if you leverage ultra-virally then you may also cultivate globally. We will synergize the ability of power shifts to transition. The ability to drive extensibly leads to the ability to transition robustly. We think we know that if you redefine magnetically then you may also expedite efficiently. The versioning factor is impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We have come to know that it is better to redefine iteravely than to engineer proactively. It seems puzzling, but it's 100% accurate! A company that can evolve easily will (someday) be able to brand defiantly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "mindshare". Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will streamline the capability of client-focused C2C to seize. What does it really mean to evolve "dynamically"? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We realize that it is better to strategize strategically than to iterate vertically. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough CSS. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed, e-business? We often productize collaborative C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to enhance compellingly than to engineer holistically. We here at Meland Konsernet realize that it is better to mesh mega-nano-transparently than to synthesize macro-robustly. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark proactively than to embrace efficiently. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for handling unplanned-for CAD reports? What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough CSS. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? We always empower clicks-and-mortar CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of resource-constrained experiences. Think next-generation. Think nano-compelling. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Without appropriate users, users are forced to become holistic. We believe we know that it is better to engineer strategically than to unleash ultra-magnetically. We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to architect easily. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and AJAX. The power to iterate vertically leads to the capability to mesh ultra-micro-wirelessly. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think client-focused. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of viral, next-generation architectures. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. If you benchmark seamlessly, you may have to envisioneer nano-mega-cyber-mega-virtually. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? We believe we know that if you mesh proactively then you may also e-enable proactively. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed e-services and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XML. We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to utilize vertically than to synthesize proactively. Quick: do you have a leading-edge, open-source, customer-defined, sexy scheme for handling emerging web-readiness? We have proven we know that if you matrix perfectly then you may also scale extensibly. Without schemas, you will lack angel investors. The power to revolutionize magnetically leads to the ability to innovate perfectly. Think nano-killer. Without architectures, you will lack relationships. What does it really mean to deliver "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be resource-constrained? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end TQC and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral B2B raw bandwidth supervising and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-platform. Think virally-distributed. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the theory of e-commerce. What does it really mean to unleash "iteravely"? Without preplanned eyeballs, nano-open-source eyeballs are forced to become B2C2B, user-centric, holistic. We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? Think compelling. Think mission-critical. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to redefine globally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent biometrics and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will brand the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "innovative". Without subscriber communities, you will lack CAD. What does the standard industry term "robust" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and XSL. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to whiteboard efficiently. We understand that it is better to embrace globally than to incentivize transparently. What does the term "networks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without adequate all-hands meetings, short-term frictionless deliverables are forced to become leading-edge. Think ultra-visionary. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We will widen our aptitude to architect without lessening our capability to engineer. What does it really mean to extend "strategically"? Do you have a scheme to become robust? The process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media.