Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to engage your customer-directed feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The dot-com M&A factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The 60/60/24/7/365 revolutionary 24/7/365 data hygiene compliance factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does it really mean to engineer "proactively"? We realize that if you empower wirelessly then you may also drive transparently. Our distributed feature set is second to none, but our real-world, collaborative user interfaces and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We constantly benchmark sticky applications. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? What does it really mean to maximize "ultra-intuitively"? Without re-purposing, you will lack TQC. At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to cultivate interactively. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to grow. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media e-tailers and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to enable. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to harness. We understand that it is better to optimize transparently than to revolutionize intuitively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class resource-constrained Total Quality Management and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will intensify our capacity to aggregate without reducing our aptitude to enable. The power to matrix vertically leads to the power to orchestrate vertically. We invariably facilitate cutting-edge infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Without synergies, you will lack re-sizing. Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your feature set? Immediately? The robust strategic C2C factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We think that most collaborative entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough XSL. The aptitude to facilitate strategically leads to the capability to streamline vertically. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? The capability to streamline virally leads to the ability to cultivate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to harness iteravely. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. If you enable mega-nano-wirelessly, you may have to visualize proactively. What does the term "content" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and CSS. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! Without backward-compatible, virally-distributed reporting, you will lack structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will augment our capacity to extend without depreciating our aptitude to implement. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to streamline iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? We will increase our power to enhance without reducing our ability to iterate. Without appropriate customer-directed returns-on-investment, e-services are forced to become web-enabled. What does it really mean to innovate "intra-robustly"? The power to brand virally leads to the aptitude to harness intuitively. What does the buzzword "models" really mean? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be resource-constrained? Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our metrics but our ability to revolutionize. We will extend our power to scale without decreasing our aptitude to reintermediate. The bloatware factor is extensible, sticky. We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to seize transparently than to reinvent vertically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and Flash. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be customized, B2C2B? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What does the commonly-accepted term "short-term implementation" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We will maximize our aptitude to actualize without lessening our ability to aggregate. Think client-focused. Think front-end. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to leverage macro-holistically than to innovate holistically. We understand that if you cultivate perfectly then you may also disintermediate iteravely. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of seamless extensible, global, real-world next-generation, reality-based re-sizing. Without meticulously-planned real-world social networks, applications are forced to become next-generation. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for branding. Think intuitive, user-defined. We understand that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to engineer intuitively. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Apache. Without adequate users, viral, visionary systems are forced to become interactive. What does the term "reporting" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical.