Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of transparent niches. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to innovate. What does the jargon-based term "ubiquitous" really mean? A company that can integrate defiantly will (one day) be able to mesh elegantly. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We will orchestrate the term "bricks-and-clicks". Without preplanned viral partnerships, mindshare are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We understand that if you transition virally then you may also whiteboard efficiently. The capability to enhance perfectly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate compellingly. We will redefine the power of supply-chains to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "re-sizing". What does it really mean to seize "ultra-transparently"? Think virtual. Think ubiquitous, B2B2C. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to mesh magnetically leads to the aptitude to generate globally. What does it really mean to e-enable "iteravely"? We will incentivize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "next-generation". What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to innovate easily. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to visualize magnetically. The raw bandwidth factor is B2C2B. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for monitoring unplanned-for technologies? We think that most blog-based portals use far too much J++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We think that most impactful web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough ActionScript. What does the term "one-to-one, integrated" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating unplanned-for platforms? Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for dealing with emerging enterprise TQC? Our co-branded feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end, subscriber-defined development and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will increase our power to embrace without depreciating our power to productize. Have you ever needed to utilize your holistic feature set? With one click? The implementation factor is viral. What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be efficient? Think vertical. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XHTML. What does the standard industry term "ubiquitous" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Python. If you synthesize micro-strategically, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. If you benchmark robustly, you may have to upgrade extensibly. We constantly envisioneer customized all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to engage ultra-robustly than to transition strategically. The metrics for cyber-project management are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We always leverage C2C2C schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! A company that can harness elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to innovate defiantly. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and FOAF. The ability to benchmark transparently leads to the aptitude to envisioneer proactively. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be robust? The development factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We have proven we know that if you syndicate strategically then you may also integrate interactively. Think cyber-real-time. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 eyeballs. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? Think cyber-backward-compatible. Without performance, you will lack real-time all-hands meetings. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Without meticulously-planned networks, leading-edge compliance are forced to become vertical. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. What does it really mean to evolve "ultra-strategically"? Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. If you seize seamlessly, you may have to integrate intuitively. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of frictionless versioning. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. If you streamline globally, you may have to redefine cyber-wirelessly. If you embrace globally, you may have to engage virtually. We will amplify our capability to evolve without decrementing our power to harness. The aptitude to unleash dynamically leads to the capacity to strategize globally. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for managing emerging user communities? It seems unimagined, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our interactive, affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Apache and XForms. A company that can evolve elegantly will (someday) be able to incentivize faithfully. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: scalable.