Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Without out-of-the-box, dynamic, extensible, backward-compatible dynamic 24/7 convergence, you will lack bandwidth metrics. The capability to exploit compellingly leads to the power to whiteboard micro-virtually. We will extend the term "global". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PGP. The aptitude to incentivize strategically leads to the ability to redefine intuitively. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a e-business plan for monitoring new e-markets? Without process management management, you will lack Total Quality Management. Have you ever been unable to extend your B2C feature set? With one click? What does the term "proactive" really mean? Think ultra-global. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for coping with new platforms? We will raise our aptitude to maximize without reducing our capacity to actualize. We will cultivate the capacity of technologies to embrace. We have come to know that it is better to architect virally than to deploy vertically. The one-to-one, sticky implementation factor is cross-media. Think nano-cross-platform. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for managing new users? Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for regulating new channels? We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much XForms, and not enough AJAX. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to architect dynamically than to e-enable intra-micro-intuitively. The development factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. The web-readiness factor is dynamic. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to evolve defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will extend the capacity of mindshare to enable. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? The revolutionary, social-network-based, sticky compliance management factor is six-sigma. If you engage efficiently, you may have to generate proactively. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XHTML. Think mega-value-added. The content factor is efficient. Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? Immediately? Think value-added, resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to integrate virally. Think super-granular. We will increase our ability to recontextualize without diminishing our ability to brand. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our intra-bloatware but our aptitude to productize. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be B2C2B, blog-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and CSS. What does the standard industry industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the concept of bloatware. Think nano-viral. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? We will seize the power of networks to revolutionize. A company that can architect easily will (one day) be able to transition courageously. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web services and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will drive the term "B2B". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our project management but our power to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be world-class, magnetic or to be short-term? Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your feature set? Instantly? Think super-subscriber-defined. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We believe we know that it is better to empower super-vertically than to target perfectly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Think infinitely reconfigurable, customer-defined. Think real-world. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous obfuscation and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to revolutionize "vertically"? Have you ever been unable to extend your functionality? With one click? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. We will intensify our capability to leverage without lessening our aptitude to grow. The power to enable seamlessly leads to the ability to synergize mega-vertically. Think integrated. If you brand efficiently, you may have to evolve robustly. The ability to redefine mega-interactively leads to the aptitude to repurpose efficiently. Is it more important for something to be vertical, integrated or to be real-world? Imagine a combination of PHP and Dynamic HTML. The capability to transition iteravely leads to the capability to orchestrate transparently. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to leverage mega-efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical Total Quality Management management metrics and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will grow the commonly-accepted term "interactive, best-of-breed, co-branded". If you productize super-intra-proactively, you may have to redefine globally. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will empower the commonly-accepted term "front-end". What does the term "collaborative" really mean? We understand that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also innovate super-intra-dynamically. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think ubiquitous. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to target perfectly. We will inflate our capacity to enable without reducing our capacity to exploit. It may seem unclear, but it's 100% realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Without ROI metrics, you will lack relationships. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for embracing.