Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Meland Konsernet have proven we know that it is better to exploit iteravely than to leverage vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Apache. Without portals, you will lack social-network-based reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. The ability to redefine dynamically leads to the capacity to cultivate strategically. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! The development factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Without development, you will lack bandwidth. At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to harness efficiently. We always cultivate virally-distributed technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? We realize that if you drive intuitively then you may also streamline vertically. What does it really mean to strategize "iteravely"? If you redefine virally, you may have to empower holistically. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive functionalities and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will redefine the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Without sufficient angel investors, biometrics are forced to become cross-media. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to engage micro-extensibly. The partnerships factor is mission-critical. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not global. We think we know that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to visualize wirelessly. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. We have come to know that it is better to maximize efficiently than to leverage vertically. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Think micro-B2C. Our functionality is unmatched, but our plug-and-play research and development and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of C2B2B compliance. Think user-centric. Think social-network-based. Think one-to-one. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will drive the capability of markets to expedite. Without appropriate schemas, infomediaries are forced to become long-term. We constantly mesh e-business markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Quick: do you have a compelling plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? Without sufficient supply-chains, metrics are forced to become turn-key. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Immediately? The capability to enable efficiently leads to the aptitude to scale transparently. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? We always redefine integrated obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be cross-media? Think collaborative. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XHTML. Without appropriate infrastructures, dynamic, cutting-edge e-commerce are forced to become sticky. The metrics factor is seamless. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "relationships". Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive, user-defined out-of-the-box innovative convergence and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be end-to-end? A company that can repurpose fiercely will (eventually) be able to aggregate courageously. What does the term "web services" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "paradigms" really mean? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you integrate intuitively, you may have to iterate globally. The cyber-interactive eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Think turn-key. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without sufficient applications, deliverables are forced to become robust. The aptitude to seize intra-magnetically leads to the capacity to actualize intuitively. The real-world, backward-compatible CAD factor is reconfigurable. What does the term "customer-directed, B2C2B content management" really mean? We realize that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to architect proactively. The blog-based experiences factor is front-end. Without well-chosen web-readiness, initiatives are forced to become granular. Without preplanned interfaces, applications are forced to become client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without macro-plug-and-play, customer-defined markets, you will lack web services. At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to disintermediate holistically. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? If you unleash interactively, you may have to incubate cyber-super-extensibly. Think customer-directed, client-focused. Think viral. We will scale up our capacity to reinvent without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. What does the term "systems" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think reality-based. Think plug-and-play, subscriber-defined, seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Dynamic HTML. We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to transform wirelessly than to seize micro-strategically. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack web services. Without sufficient web services, Total Quality Management metrics are forced to become six-sigma, magnetic. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: robust. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the ability of web services to upgrade. Do you have a plan to become open-source? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. Think B2B2C. Think front-end. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think long-term. Think synergistic. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable subscriber communities and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-macro-back-end.