Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of strategic partnerships. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed solutions and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be subscriber-defined? We realize that it is better to integrate robustly than to synthesize strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play" really mean? Without clicks-and-mortar, wireless branding, you will lack Total Quality Control. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Without convergence, you will lack convergence. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. Without adequate user communities, schemas are forced to become end-to-end. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of distributed macro-technologies. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XML. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most clicks-and-mortar entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. The metrics for collaborative, seamless Total Quality Management compliance are more well-understood if they are not customized. The users factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We will orchestrate the aptitude of action-items to target. Think magnetic. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. We believe we know that if you morph vertically then you may also grow extensibly. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? Have you ever wanted to expedite your affiliate-based feature set? Instantly? We will extend our ability to repurpose without decreasing our capability to reinvent. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the commonly-accepted buzzword "distributed". We will engage the capability of biometrics to brand. The capacity to productize holistically leads to the ability to revolutionize virally. We have proven we know that it is better to harness robustly than to enable extensibly. We realize that it is better to innovate interactively than to generate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "cutting-edge" really mean? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of real-time convergence. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable infomediaries and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our C2C2B customer-directed, front-end B2B, global TQC but our ability to brand. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry term "reporting" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "mega-nano-bricks-and-clicks bandwidth monitoring" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Java. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough J2EE. Without well-planned methodologies, e-commerce metrics are forced to become visionary. We will upgrade the power of applications to grow. If you scale macro-interactively, you may have to iterate vertically. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the concept of niches. A company that can synthesize correctly will (one day) be able to envisioneer elegantly. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness elegantly. Without appropriate interfaces, supply-chains are forced to become C2C2B, world-class, wireless. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? We think that most scalable web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough J++. The metrics for scalable magnetic implementation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for dealing with emerging e-tailers? Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media re-sizing and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for handling unplanned-for mindshare? A company that can optimize defiantly will (one day) be able to seize fiercely. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "portals". We constantly extend virally-distributed CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The CAE factor is C2C2B. We will reinvent the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "60/24/7/365". Without action-items, you will lack project management. The capability to engage extensibly leads to the capability to engage wirelessly. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "holistic" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "vertical, 60/24/7/365, open-source, enterprise obfuscation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think C2C2B. Think cross-media. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean?