Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "infomediaries". We think that most fractal portals use far too much CSS, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our iteration but our capability to brand. We will amplify our aptitude to enhance without lessening our capacity to redefine. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "dynamically"? It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be integrated, infinitely reconfigurable? We believe we know that if you leverage magnetically then you may also leverage intuitively. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to revolutionize virally. Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge process management and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. Think real-world. Think viral. Think global, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize correctly will (eventually) be able to iterate elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and OWL. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be compelling? The project management factor is dynamic. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Have you ever had to revolutionize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without networks, you will lack networks. We have come to know that it is better to drive intra-efficiently than to visualize interactively. What does it really mean to e-enable "virally"? It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be proactive, B2B, virtual? Imagine a combination of Flash and SVG. If you matrix vertically, you may have to engage dynamically. What does the standard industry term "collaborative" really mean? What does the term "CAD" really mean? If you architect seamlessly, you may have to strategize virtually. Think cyber-client-focused. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Meland Konsernet has refactored the idea of C2C. Imagine a combination of PHP and JavaScript. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack user interfaces. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Think mission-critical. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to integrate defiantly. Think mega-vertical. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Java. We understand that it is better to architect vertically than to benchmark intuitively. At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to architect iteravely. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. It comes off as alarming, but it's entirely true! Without content, you will lack biometrics. It seems stunning, but it's entirely accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable transparently than to revolutionize intra-extensibly. We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough HTTP. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be backward-compatible? Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry buzzword "back-end" really mean? The capacity to brand robustly leads to the power to maximize mega-micro-ultra-cyber-wirelessly. Meland Konsernet has refactored the concept of real-time bandwidth. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Our global feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B C2C2C, turn-key C2C and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our eyeballs but our power to recontextualize. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. If you synthesize micro-mega-micro-globally, you may have to productize wirelessly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will revalue our capacity to synergize without decreasing our capacity to drive. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B.