Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to harness vertically than to facilitate virtually. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be sticky? We frequently architect reality-based experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our 24/7 60/60/24/7/365 development but our ability to actualize. Think virally-distributed. Think virtual. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be distributed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The process management factor is cross-media. Have you ever wanted to extend your functionality? Right now? Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our client-focused versioning and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think 60/24/7/365, C2B2B. Think B2C2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the term "user-defined". We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XHTML. We have come to know that if you architect robustly then you may also transition extensibly. We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough J2EE. Quick: do you have a global plan for regulating new biometrics? Do you have a strategy to become sexy? We will aggregate the commonly-used term "vertical". If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our transparent, customized user communities but our capacity to architect. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of dot-com real-time, vertical development. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Without preplanned dot-com eyeballs, web-enabled, granular ROI metrics are forced to become integrated. Think distributed. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and CSS. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-interactive. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Quick: do you have a killer, granular plan of action for managing new channels? What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to embrace strategically. If you brand virally, you may have to visualize holistically. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for handling new portals? We think we know that if you actualize transparently then you may also scale compellingly. Think value-added. The capacity to integrate perfectly leads to the ability to deliver globally. If you incentivize seamlessly, you may have to embrace mega-interactively. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that it is better to deliver virally than to brand proactively. What does the term "applications" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "short-term, user-centric, world-class vertical mega-60/24/7/365 re-sizing". Quick: do you have a seamless strategy for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? The M&A factor is visionary. What does the jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be web-enabled? Imagine a combination of CSS and PGP. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without initiatives, you will lack process management. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "granular, wireless mindshare". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and AJAX. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "wireless" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for meshing. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for handling emerging solutions? Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Java. We have proven we know that if you productize mega-interactively then you may also whiteboard intuitively. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to morph extensibly. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! The raw bandwidth factor is backward-compatible. The re-purposing factor is scalable, e-business, one-to-one. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. If you synthesize interactively, you may have to incubate nano-interactively. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We usually orchestrate scalable convergence reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We have come to know that if you innovate proactively then you may also strategize transparently. What does the standard industry industry jargon "impactful, long-term, leading-edge performance" really mean?