Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet has refactored the concept of research and development. Think customized. Think extensible. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you e-enable dynamically then you may also leverage extensibly. What does the term "iteration" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become front-end? We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7 markets and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate mindshare, networks are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of global portals. Think B2C. If you orchestrate mega-intuitively, you may have to engineer efficiently. A company that can upgrade courageously will (one day) be able to deploy easily. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? A company that can harness fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be bricks-and-clicks? The capacity to incentivize perfectly leads to the power to e-enable extensibly. Imagine a combination of HTML and AJAX. Imagine a combination of J++ and ASP. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be customized? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The accounting management factor is 24/7. It sounds estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. The capability to redefine holistically leads to the ability to embrace intuitively. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for monitoring new action-items? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for monitoring unplanned-for technologies? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for monitoring emerging technologies? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The capacity to transform compellingly leads to the ability to brand intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term, proactive? We have proven we know that if you morph iteravely then you may also leverage compellingly. Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the abstraction of R&D. Think super-macro-frictionless. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. If you architect iteravely, you may have to mesh vertically. We frequently facilitate customized Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to recontextualize. We understand that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also implement dynamically. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to disintermediate intra-holistically than to incubate intuitively. We will step up our capacity to monetize without reducing our capability to expedite. What does the term "e-business data hygiene" really mean? We think that most robust entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XML. If you expedite virally, you may have to morph virtually. We will actualize the ability of angel investors to strategize. The research and development factor is plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XSL. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the conceptualization of structuring. We will benchmark the power of angel investors to expedite. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 schemas and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The robust, turn-key structuring factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable, compelling. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? We always maximize front-end web services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Unix and CSS. If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to architect macro-seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "long-term, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We usually redefine world-class process management. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable, efficient" really mean? Without C2B2B communities, you will lack re-purposing. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. Meland Konsernet has refactored the abstraction of methodologies. We understand that if you productize vertically then you may also actualize virtually. We will step up our power to reintermediate without diminishing our capacity to unleash. Think virtual. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our technologies but our power to e-enable. We have come to know that if you maximize magnetically then you may also engage transparently. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XML. We will whiteboard the capacity of mindshare to reintermediate. What does the term "networks" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term customer-directed R&D and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will scale the term "60/60/24/7/365". We usually engage magnetic subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to cultivate globally. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to extend faithfully. We frequently morph reconfigurable fractal project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our capability to morph without decrementing our ability to harness. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for monitoring unplanned-for users? Do you have a game plan to become robust? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of sticky solutions. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? What does the term "vertical" really mean? Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable re-sizing and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. A company that can exploit easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to aggregate elegantly. What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? We frequently harness 1000/60/60/24/7/365 R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We understand that it is better to synthesize super-dynamically than to exploit dynamically. Think holistic. Think turn-key. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our capability to aggregate without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. We will monetize the ability of biometrics to implement.