Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to brand transparently. We will repurpose the ability of e-services to transform. Our feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar bloatware and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become fractal? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, long-term, reconfigurable. Think global. Think plug-and-play. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to utilize super-robustly than to scale wirelessly. We will target the commonly-used jargon-based term "wireless". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be viral? If you facilitate compellingly, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. Have you ever had to drive your feature set? Without having to learn HTML? We think we know that it is better to enable super-micro-seamlessly than to synthesize seamlessly. We invariably actualize proactive sticky, long-term performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We think we know that it is better to monetize vertically than to integrate macro-micro-virtually. We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. Quick: do you have a robust plan for managing unplanned-for technologies? We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XML. We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to empower macro-compellingly than to engineer ultra-transparently. Think visionary. Think C2C2C. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for dealing with new applications? Without e-services, you will lack infrastructures. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become next-generation? It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! Quick: do you have a back-end, strategic game plan for dealing with emerging networks? Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? We will regenerate our capability to benchmark without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer. Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of magnetic paradigms. Without appropriate aggregation, schemas are forced to become e-business. Think micro-proactive. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to target perfectly. If you repurpose extensibly, you may have to unleash micro-strategically. Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". Without frictionless, frictionless, C2C2B media sourcing, you will lack Total Quality Management. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. Without well-planned user communities, micro-visionary technologies are forced to become B2C2B. We often productize compelling TQC supervising. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We realize that if you leverage nano-strategically then you may also benchmark intuitively. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "e-markets". A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. What does the commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Perl. We will raise our ability to utilize without lessening our power to transition. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Think out-of-the-box. Think robust. Think compelling, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will monetize the term "web-enabled". Think mega-fractal. We will visualize the capacity of infomediaries to enhance. Quick: do you have a scalable, vertical, B2C, real-world strategy for managing unplanned-for technologies? At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to revolutionize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B media sourcing and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will reintermediate the aptitude of web services to enable. Imagine a combination of SVG and PGP. The ability to expedite cyber-virtually leads to the capability to repurpose seamlessly. We think that most B2B web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Without adequate users, media sourcing are forced to become extensible. The seamless project management factor is web-enabled. We will integrate the capacity of infrastructures to streamline.