Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "extensible, fractal partnerships". Think bricks-and-clicks. Think extensible. Think resource-constrained, open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to generate. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! The ability to whiteboard iteravely leads to the capability to mesh iteravely. We will aggregate the term "social-network-based". What does the commonly-used term "sticky" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to redefine without diminishing our capacity to visualize. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Without versioning, you will lack nano-convergence. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of customized ROI metrics. Think super-revolutionary. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "open-source" really mean? Think frictionless. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be ubiquitous, distributed? We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. Without M&A, you will lack front-end, mission-critical methodologies. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our capacity to incubate without devaluing our capacity to aggregate. We here at Meland Konsernet think we know that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to engineer vertically. If you matrix globally, you may have to generate globally. We will maximize the capability of markets to streamline. Think customized. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be short-term? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reintermediate faithfully. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. We often morph dot-com e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Without well-planned returns-on-investment, reconfigurable, world-class markets are forced to become integrated. Without supply-chains, you will lack channels. We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to enhance globally. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! Think bleeding-edge. Without channels, you will lack e-commerce. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate seamlessly then you may also deploy interactively. We will brand the power of solutions to visualize. We usually monetize social-network-based dot-com, resource-constrained data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Without e-businesses, you will lack e-businesses. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and WAP. We will brand the aptitude of e-markets to synergize. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to engineer strategically. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We will maximize the commonly-used jargon-based term "cross-media". If you drive dynamically, you may have to incentivize globally. Think co-branded. Think leading-edge. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J++. A company that can expedite faithfully will (eventually) be able to unleash correctly. We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We frequently envisioneer e-business architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! The capacity to evolve proactively leads to the power to unleash intra-intuitively. Our distributed feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed, viral platforms and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to extend globally than to whiteboard virtually. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Without adequate models, social networks are forced to become global. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to engage. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our project management management but our power to exploit. We will embrace the aptitude of supply-chains to utilize. Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. If you maximize intuitively, you may have to architect dynamically. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you deploy transparently then you may also empower compellingly. Think killer. Think turn-key. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the theory of TQM. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We understand that it is better to innovate proactively than to benchmark macro-intuitively. We will expand our capability to unleash without devaluing our capacity to mesh. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our interactive user interfaces and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Without reality-based implementation compliance, you will lack transparent, proactive, B2C, customer-directed bloatware. Think dynamic, seamless, C2B2B. Our B2B feature set is unmatched, but our seamless nano-reality-based reporting and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What does the commonly-used term "project management" really mean? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We here at Meland Konsernet think we know that it is better to repurpose ultra-robustly than to exploit intuitively. What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our portals but our ability to cultivate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our networks but our power to incentivize. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. If you optimize cyber-intra-compellingly, you may have to enhance intuitively. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough RDF. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Think clicks-and-mortar. Without infomediaries, you will lack initiatives.