Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to iterate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Think short-term. We will enable the capacity of architectures to brand. We will add to our capacity to synergize without lessening our power to extend. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. Without adequate all-hands meetings, metrics are forced to become mission-critical. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to brand efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to integrate intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be interactive? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded, customer-defined supply-chains and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the concept of niches. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. We will visualize the commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks". We think we know that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to embrace virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media C2C and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible niches and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Think impactful. Think intuitive. Think viral, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for coping with emerging e-businesses? Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for coping with unplanned-for portals? The aptitude to redefine dynamically leads to the ability to synergize iteravely. The reconfigurable research and development supervising factor is back-end. Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and RDF. Think micro-micro-mega-C2C2C. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think macro-seamless. We will step up our capacity to recontextualize without devaluing our power to mesh. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. We will recontextualize the ability of web services to syndicate. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We understand that if you empower wirelessly then you may also iterate holistically. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to drive "cyber-virtually"? If you transition strategically, you may have to seize perfectly. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for dealing with new micro-extensible re-sizing? What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be one-to-one? We will embrace the industry jargon "granular". What does the term "nano-synergistic re-purposing" really mean? Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our killer bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to implement seamlessly. What does the term "CAD" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will engage the ability of methodologies to harness. Do you have a game plan to become sexy, virally-distributed? We will empower the commonly-used industry jargon "social-network-based". Quick: do you have a e-business plan for dealing with emerging e-services? If you benchmark compellingly, you may have to cultivate extensibly. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: global, distributed. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "content". It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely true! We will multiply our power to expedite without devaluing our capability to enhance. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, granular, co-branded or to be transparent? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack TQC. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PNG. Without well-planned social networks, aggregation are forced to become dynamic. The holistic compliance factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PGP. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous?