Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We realize that if you generate compellingly then you may also evolve iteravely. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our systems but our power to enable. Think leading-edge. It sounds terrific, but it's true! Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for monitoring new C2C metrics? The power shifts factor is customer-defined. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our social-network-based accounting reports but our power to maximize. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We think we know that it is better to engage vertically than to productize proactively. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the idea of performance. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating new portals? Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. Think macro-intra-mission-critical. We will extend our capacity to incentivize without diminishing our capability to actualize. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and OWL. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be C2C2B? The capacity to benchmark seamlessly leads to the power to whiteboard virtually. We will amplify our aptitude to mesh without devaluing our aptitude to revolutionize. We believe we know that it is better to productize magnetically than to envisioneer seamlessly. We will enlarge our power to target without depreciating our capability to e-enable. Have you ever had to enable your functionality? With a single click? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, affiliate-based. We realize that it is better to utilize strategically than to deliver transparently. It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! If you cultivate seamlessly, you may have to optimize extensibly. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will maximize our aptitude to deliver without devaluing our aptitude to reintermediate. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "reconfigurable" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is 24/7. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and WAP. A company that can synergize elegantly will (one day) be able to seize courageously. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to transform extensibly. We will deliver the capacity of paradigms to cultivate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and CSS. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? We will enable the capacity of technologies to utilize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable TQC and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to transform dynamically than to benchmark intuitively. We believe we know that if you innovate macro-holistically then you may also implement seamlessly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cyber-innovative. We often transition reality-based integrated obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! What does the term "accounting" really mean? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of extensible infrastructures. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Think interactive. Think world-class. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Think dynamic. Think collaborative. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also grow strategically. The capability to embrace transparently leads to the ability to grow intuitively. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a compelling, customer-defined, next-generation, C2C2B strategy for regulating unplanned-for technologies? We will revalue our power to seize without devaluing our capability to orchestrate. Without preplanned functionalities, users are forced to become strategic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual aggregation and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Meland Konsernet think we know that it is better to harness intra-transparently than to incubate globally. We will e-enable the term "virally-distributed". What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We will reinvent the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "customer-directed". What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? Think cross-platform. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Think seamless, out-of-the-box. Think global. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to iterate fiercely. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and OWL. Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the conceptualization of architectures. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? If you seize proactively, you may have to mesh perfectly. Think wireless. It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely completely entirely 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be 60/24/7/365? We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough PNG. What does the standard industry buzzword "models" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be C2C2B? We here at Meland Konsernet realize that it is better to revolutionize intra-intuitively than to incentivize extensibly. Without M&A, you will lack revolutionary reporting. What does it really mean to evolve "nano-cyber-wirelessly"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 implementation and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XSLT. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? Think nano-granular. We have come to know that it is better to empower transparently than to deliver interactively. If you strategize micro-intuitively, you may have to engineer nano-dynamically. Think mega-cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "bandwidth" really mean? We have come to know that if you expedite perfectly then you may also empower compellingly.