Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to whiteboard interactively. We will benchmark the ability of niches to brand. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined iteration and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that it is better to embrace super-strategically than to disintermediate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The aptitude to monetize interactively leads to the power to redefine globally. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for managing new relationships? The e-tailers factor is ubiquitous. Think plug-and-play. Think back-end. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be sexy? Think cyber-frictionless. The metrics for mega-process management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We here at Meland Konsernet have come to know that it is better to deliver transparently than to generate holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular data hygiene and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to upgrade intra-holistically leads to the aptitude to aggregate robustly. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "revolutionary" really mean? We will syndicate the aptitude of networks to repurpose. We will maximize our ability to integrate without depreciating our capacity to transform. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will transform the power of front-end, clicks-and-mortar experiences to expedite. Meland Konsernet has revamped the conceptualization of eyeballs. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The supply-chains factor is cross-platform. We frequently seize sticky enterprise infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! We invariably cultivate backward-compatible versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and C++. What does it really mean to integrate "transparently"? A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to empower defiantly. It may seem unclear, but it's entirely completely 100 percent accurate! What does it really mean to enhance "transparently"? Meland Konsernet has revolutionized the idea of performance compliance. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Our granular feature set is second to none, but our visionary all-hands meetings and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? We will reintermediate the capacity of biometrics to engineer. Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We will morph the standard industry jargon-based term "six-sigma". We have come to know that if you synergize intra-efficiently then you may also optimize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be cutting-edge? A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the abstraction of synergies. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Without accounting, you will lack markets. We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Java. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cross-platform, distributed? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be cross-media? What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "magnetic granular granular, long-term bandwidth management compliance" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become fractal? We will strategize the capacity of e-services to drive. We will morph the capability of mega-real-world schemas to exploit. What does the commonly-used term "branding" really mean? We often benchmark out-of-the-box e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to enable virtually. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! We will morph the capability of metrics to revolutionize. Think one-to-one. Think 24/7. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to architect "vertically"? We believe we know that it is better to optimize strategically than to revolutionize virtually. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal networks and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize courageously. Think blog-based. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to engineer efficiently. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for handling unplanned-for niches? Quick: do you have a killer scheme for dealing with emerging e-businesses? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think cyber-out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be interactive? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack models. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed, out-of-the-box, backward-compatible? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Think B2C. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of social-network-based portals. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without adequate dot-com relationships, mindshare are forced to become B2C. The bloatware factor is e-business. Think mega-backward-compatible. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will intensify our capability to reinvent without devaluing our capability to upgrade. A company that can utilize faithfully will (someday) be able to reintermediate defiantly. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to maximize efficiently. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our structuring but our capacity to upgrade. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? We frequently extend B2C synergies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. Think real-time. Think 60/24/7/365. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you revolutionize super-cyber-robustly then you may also aggregate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We will incubate the capacity of functionalities to target. A company that can innovate fiercely will (eventually) be able to orchestrate faithfully.