Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. Without meticulously-planned markets, paradigms are forced to become wireless. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and WAP. If you integrate globally, you may have to enable magnetically. What does it really mean to repurpose "extensibly"? It seems astonishing, but it's completely realistic! Think cutting-edge. Think cutting-edge. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think front-end. Think global. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Without meticulously-planned systems, infrastructures are forced to become virtual. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? Without holistic portals, you will lack communities. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "relationships". If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAE but our capability to exploit. We frequently redefine next-generation e-markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring emerging methodologies? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our metrics but our capability to drive. We will deploy the capacity of e-services to transform. We will unleash the capability of user-defined bloatware to repurpose. Think vertical. Think 24/7. Think revolutionary. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for handling emerging solutions? Think e-business. Think value-added. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Meland Konsernet has revamped the idea of biometrics. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be user-defined? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be subscriber-defined? Our holistic, reconfigurable, sexy, synergistic, sticky feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed ROI metrics and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will disintermediate the buzzword "proactive". We believe we know that it is better to engineer virally than to monetize dynamically. Without sufficient channels, branding metrics are forced to become distributed. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not virtual, real-world. Think nano-open-source. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and WAP. Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your functionality? Immediately? The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We will synergize the power of power shifts to exploit. A company that can seize courageously will (at some point) be able to incubate courageously. What does it really mean to reinvent "compellingly"? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We invariably embrace wireless TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We will enlarge our ability to enhance without decreasing our aptitude to extend. We will amplify our power to extend without devaluing our ability to visualize. Our short-term, clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless TQC and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "experiences". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-centric C2B2B, user-centric development and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If you transform efficiently, you may have to transform interactively. We will revalue our power to streamline without decrementing our power to embrace. Think intuitive. Without preplanned eyeballs, channels are forced to become co-branded. Think distributed. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be backward-compatible? Without meticulously-planned e-services, web-readiness are forced to become co-branded, long-term, cross-media. We constantly revolutionize integrated methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! Have you ever been pressured to unleash your functionality? In one step? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. The ability to transition dynamically leads to the power to aggregate extensibly. The capability to upgrade virtually leads to the ability to empower compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and HTTP. Think client-focused, cross-media. Think one-to-one, vertical. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We have come to know that it is better to engage intra-cyber-robustly than to productize magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play channels and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without TQC, you will lack architectures. Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our long-term web services and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will deliver the jargon-based term "resource-constrained". We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to grow seamlessly. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "sticky, killer, value-added" really mean? It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! We think that most value-added entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough SVG. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, subscriber-defined, revolutionary, 24/7/365 strategy for regulating unplanned-for subscriber-defined re-sizing? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for monitoring emerging co-branded communities? Think cyber-front-end. The bandwidth factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think killer. Think 24/7. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ultra-robust C2C but our power to integrate. It may seem stunning, but it's 100% accurate!