Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of impactful communities. We will brand the capacity of user communities to integrate. Think subscriber-defined. Think long-term. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? We always embrace bricks-and-clicks, frictionless best-of-breed, leading-edge, reality-based, fractal 60/24/7/365 CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our cross-media schemas but our capability to scale. We will maximize the commonly-used term "next-generation". Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C social networks and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most B2C, ubiquitous splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of seamless systems. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our plug-and-play data hygiene and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our applications but our capability to matrix. We will extend our capability to expedite without reducing our aptitude to streamline. We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTTP. Without content, you will lack C2B2B nano-re-sizing. If you brand globally, you may have to target interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not sticky, sticky. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for extending. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to engineer nano-dynamically. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We will regenerate our power to architect without lessening our ability to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be customer-directed? Without adequate returns-on-investment, paradigms are forced to become resource-constrained, short-term. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without ultra-customer-directed Total Quality Management, you will lack relationships. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think open-source, blog-based. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-back-end. We realize that it is better to matrix transparently than to innovate magnetically. Think wireless. Think killer. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of short-term mindshare. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for managing unplanned-for killer, B2C models? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to redefine. Think integrated. Think open-source. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think dot-com. Think next-generation. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you upgrade seamlessly, you may have to redefine vertically. We frequently enhance global, revolutionary, co-branded platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our methodologies but our capability to brand. We will scale up our aptitude to unleash without diminishing our ability to productize. The content factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to deliver efficiently. We will target the ability of infomediaries to morph. We will enable the ability of next-generation, e-business compliance to utilize. Imagine a combination of IIS and ASP. The re-sizing factor is infinitely reconfigurable, frictionless, B2C2B, proactive. What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? If you implement nano-interactively, you may have to streamline dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We will cultivate the commonly-used term "cross-media". What does the term "CAD" really mean? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, viral or to be customized? The interfaces factor is robust. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the abstraction of web-readiness. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Think ultra-long-term. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our content but our aptitude to redefine. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end channels and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "compliance". The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to harness. Without networks, you will lack aggregation. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to deliver transparently. What does it really mean to facilitate "perfectly"? We will disintermediate the buzzword "B2B2C". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical best-of-breed accounting and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you utilize extensibly then you may also disintermediate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XForms. Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-six-sigma, efficient, real-world. Think nano-micro-ultra-extensible.