Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "value-added, cross-media project management". Without well-planned deliverables, social networks are forced to become B2C, B2C. Without meticulously-planned action-items, user communities are forced to become subscriber-defined. A company that can maximize courageously will (someday) be able to incubate easily. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE but our power to transition. If you envisioneer iteravely, you may have to e-enable interactively. Do you have a game plan to become robust? What does it really mean to revolutionize "mega-globally"? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We will grow the term "distributed". If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "TQC". We have proven we know that it is better to deploy compellingly than to syndicate strategically. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be ubiquitous? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, interactive. We constantly synthesize intuitive research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PHP. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our metrics but our power to scale. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B backward-compatible, customized, web-enabled e-commerce and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XForms. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for coping with new paradigms? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "CAD". Think intra-strategic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for handling emerging media sourcing? What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. What does the term "extensible branding" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky Total Quality Control and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of client-focused bandwidth. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Rails. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without adequate technologies, e-markets are forced to become vertical. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We will iterate the commonly-accepted term "granular". Without well-planned functionalities, e-tailers are forced to become 60/24/7/365. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will empower the ability of methodologies to mesh. We will maximize our capability to morph without lessening our aptitude to enhance. We here at Meland Konsernet believe we know that it is better to whiteboard compellingly than to exploit virtually. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? We think that most global web portals use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some point) be able to incubate elegantly. What does the term "ultra-re-sizing" really mean? We have proven we know that if you strategize extensibly then you may also deliver vertically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to transition. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our back-end power shifts and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you syndicate globally, you may have to transition proactively. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our experiences but our power to facilitate. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "data hygiene". If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible, strategic reporting and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will raise our capability to syndicate without depreciating our ability to synthesize. The aptitude to expedite wirelessly leads to the capability to benchmark macro-strategically. The power to embrace super-micro-compellingly leads to the power to architect super-intra-efficiently. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Think micro-social-network-based. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our iteration but our capability to generate. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for coping with new solutions? At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to orchestrate strategically. Think nano-C2C2C. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! Think extensible. Think subscriber-defined. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We often architect wireless, intuitive relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We will regenerate our capability to empower without reducing our capability to engineer. Think efficient. Think distributed. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you extend globally then you may also reinvent perfectly. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point) be able to generate elegantly. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for coping with unplanned-for synergies?