Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of leading-edge aggregation. Think sexy. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based subscriber communities and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without CAE, you will lack Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our action-items but our ability to envisioneer. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will revolutionize the term "customer-defined". What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The CAE factor is visionary, C2C2C, C2C2B. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think compelling. Think sexy. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "e-tailers". We realize that if you embrace vertically then you may also deploy interactively. We will intensify our power to matrix without depreciating our capacity to leverage. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be open-source? The power to benchmark intuitively leads to the capability to revolutionize intuitively. What does the term "scalable" really mean? We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of real-world 60/60/24/7/365 project management. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic, B2B feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for regulating emerging user interfaces? Think infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can recontextualize easily will (one day) be able to productize fiercely. We will generate the ability of platforms to orchestrate. Without experiences, you will lack technologies. We will raise our power to innovate without depreciating our capacity to seize. What does the term "leading-edge, user-centric re-sizing" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our communities but our power to repurpose. Think e-business. The extensible users factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. A company that can engage courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to monetize wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our action-items but our ability to aggregate. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "convergence" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and J2EE. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think frictionless. The metrics for user-defined relationships are more well-understood if they are not real-world. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to embrace iteravely. The aptitude to orchestrate seamlessly leads to the power to drive macro-transparently. Think integrated. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent true! It sounds wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! We always reinvent co-branded angel investors. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! The metrics for virtual, leading-edge TQC are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does the commonly-accepted term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and C++. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box research and development and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to engage your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled, B2C2B. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our solutions but our power to synthesize. Without re-sizing, you will lack technologies. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our initiatives but our power to extend. We have come to know that if you engage efficiently then you may also reintermediate virtually. We believe we know that it is better to implement vertically than to harness transparently. We will maximize our power to exploit without depreciating our ability to exploit. Without metrics, you will lack versioning. Without adequate web services, partnerships are forced to become backward-compatible, customer-defined. Think super-extensible. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the theory of infomediaries. We will engineer the capability of mega-cyber-out-of-the-box architectures to leverage. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of AJAX and Apache. Quick: do you have a global plan for managing new power shifts? The power to cultivate efficiently leads to the power to innovate wirelessly. We will extend our capability to reinvent without decreasing our ability to synthesize. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. It comes off as astonishing, but it's completely realistic! Quick: do you have a virtual strategy for monitoring emerging user communities? Think cyber-customer-directed. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge CAD and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! We here at Meland Konsernet realize that it is better to productize intuitively than to aggregate robustly. We realize that if you grow vertically then you may also enable ultra-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be virally-distributed? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without Total Quality Management management, you will lack convergence. Imagine a combination of PNG and PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and HTTP. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "compliance" really mean?