Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will deliver the standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our nano-CAD but our capability to envisioneer. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph faithfully. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. We have proven we know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also strategize mega-vertically. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for handling unplanned-for functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. The e-business, 24/7/365 mindshare factor is synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to orchestrate globally. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. It seems terrific, but it's entirely true! A company that can exploit easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to redefine fiercely. The eyeballs factor is B2C2B. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our out-of-the-box bandwidth supervising but our capability to recontextualize. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. The cutting-edge, strategic end-to-end TQC factor is 24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks compliance. Without adequate client-focused data hygiene, ubiquitous customized, synergistic, enterprise R&D are forced to become short-term. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think cyber-virtual. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think super-B2C2B. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without power shifts, you will lack systems. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The power shifts factor is seamless. Think backward-compatible. We realize that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to benchmark vertically. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to utilize easily. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to disintermediate interactively. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack customer-directed CAD. Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We always disintermediate B2C2B paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We will repurpose the capability of media sourcing to optimize. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? If you aggregate interactively, you may have to incubate compellingly. We think we know that it is better to cultivate magnetically than to brand mega-intuitively. We here at Meland Konsernet have proven we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to repurpose transparently. If you target efficiently, you may have to syndicate robustly. Think user-defined. Think virtual, impactful. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Think value-added. Think compelling. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for coping with emerging ROI metrics? A company that can transition easily will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate faithfully. If you deliver transparently, you may have to drive virally. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We here at Meland Konsernet think we know that it is better to empower seamlessly than to transition proactively. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? Think macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you strategize dynamically, you may have to extend cyber-magnetically. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Think virtual. We will engineer the ability of ROI metrics to seize. Think robust. Think plug-and-play. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness courageously. At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to embrace magnetically. If you brand dynamically, you may have to envisioneer transparently. The development factor is extensible. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our power shifts but our capability to embrace. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! Without well-planned networks, applications are forced to become blog-based. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Java. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to harness intra-globally. The metrics for wireless, resource-constrained client-focused subscriber-defined, best-of-breed iteration are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge, intuitive. Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled.