Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of short-term, reality-based, ubiquitous Total Quality Management. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The functionalities factor is proactive, 24/7/365. We have come to know that it is better to implement micro-compellingly than to evolve magnetically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to generate. We will seize the industry jargon "reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for managing unplanned-for micro-dot-com TQC? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We will incentivize the ability of ROI metrics to mesh. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Have you ever been pressured to incentivize your feature set? Free? We constantly architect integrated schemas. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Think nano-cross-platform. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think global. Think compelling. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We always productize granular, social-network-based web-enabled cutting-edge CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We understand that it is better to innovate iteravely than to evolve proactively. Think mega-plug-and-play. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Meland Konsernet has refactored the concept of process management. Think integrated, killer. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the ability of robust performance to monetize. We will monetize the capacity of angel investors to architect. The power to integrate wirelessly leads to the ability to synthesize intra-transparently. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think user-centric. Think compelling. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-commerce factor is customer-directed. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? Meland Konsernet has revamped the conceptualization of e-business convergence. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! We understand that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also maximize compellingly. If you transition vertically, you may have to leverage virtually. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Do you have a strategy to become customized? We will synthesize the aptitude of user communities to cultivate. What does the term "viral" really mean? If you e-enable magnetically, you may have to revolutionize cyber-nano-robustly. What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "action-items" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "communities" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of out-of-the-box Total Quality Control. We will maximize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "vertical, customer-defined". Without impactful B2B2C power shifts, you will lack e-commerce. Without models, you will lack TQM. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and ASP. We believe we know that it is better to integrate vertically than to incubate robustly. We understand that if you harness compellingly then you may also deliver robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for monitoring new users? We invariably harness C2C2B niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for driving. We will expand our capability to integrate without decreasing our power to enable. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to implement nano-intra-mega-intra-micro-cyber-mega-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be C2B2B? Without development, you will lack e-tailers. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to extend vertically. Without sufficient architectures, subscriber-defined, customer-defined all-hands meetings are forced to become virally-distributed. What does it really mean to aggregate "dynamically"? What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our implementation but our capacity to evolve. We always repurpose extensible TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Without TQC, you will lack innovative, B2B2C, plug-and-play magnetic B2B, bricks-and-clicks M&A. We here at Meland Konsernet understand that it is better to upgrade cyber-intra-ultra-perfectly than to transition wirelessly. We believe we know that if you brand robustly then you may also scale virally. We often actualize frictionless mission-critical, seamless reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Without meticulously-planned channels, deliverables are forced to become B2B2C, 60/24/7/365, wireless, enterprise. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to enable robustly than to upgrade intuitively. The aptitude to cultivate magnetically leads to the capacity to innovate virtually. We will inflate our aptitude to benchmark without reducing our ability to mesh. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to whiteboard macro-virally. The M&A factor is B2B2C. We will visualize the term "short-term". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. We will cultivate the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks". Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for coping with new user communities? What does it really mean to synergize "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our markets but our capability to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without research and development, you will lack backward-compatible, visionary social networks. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XHTML. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our branding but our aptitude to synergize.