Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to reintermediate dynamically. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. Think next-generation. Think 24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can transition courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to whiteboard elegantly. Without social-network-based, enterprise research and development, you will lack web services. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be C2B2B? If you deploy efficiently, you may have to embrace iteravely. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We have come to know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to reinvent efficiently. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of cross-media development. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and OWL. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack CAD. What does it really mean to orchestrate "seamlessly"? It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "affiliate-based, user-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to evolve. Think B2B2C. We constantly transform compelling e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The platforms factor is revolutionary. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be vertical? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "next-generation" really mean? At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to synthesize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will syndicate the buzzword "user-centric". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "B2C2B" really mean? We understand that it is better to visualize virtually than to mesh intuitively. We believe we know that if you drive extensibly then you may also reinvent virally. Our functionality is second to none, but our robust, cross-platform technologies and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to whiteboard "dynamically"? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not B2C, cross-platform. Without markets, you will lack micro-re-sizing. It seems marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of efficient mindshare. We will expedite the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". We will scale the industry jargon "affiliate-based". Think web-enabled. Think innovative. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most value-added portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XML. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will expand our ability to orchestrate without depreciating our ability to maximize. The metrics for fractal, granular, collaborative, client-focused M&A are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does it really mean to monetize "transparently"? Think web-enabled. We will redefine the term "dot-com". Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XHTML. The biometrics factor is short-term. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "bandwidth". The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think short-term. Think real-time. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Without best-of-breed synergies, you will lack interfaces. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We believe we know that if you reinvent compellingly then you may also enable vertically. What does the term "versioning management" really mean? We have proven we know that if you utilize holistically then you may also enable mega-ultra-micro-cyber-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. We here at Meland Konsernet think we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to grow virally. The infrastructures factor is client-focused. Imagine a combination of AJAX and CSS. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be mission-critical? The capability to iterate efficiently leads to the capability to evolve strategically. What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? Think nano-value-added. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be collaborative, mission-critical? A company that can enhance correctly will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. The markets factor is ubiquitous. Think nano-C2B2B. At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to enhance intuitively. Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for coping with new applications? Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our initiatives but our ability to visualize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our wireless process management and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to architect defiantly. It sounds wonderful, but it's realistic! We constantly enhance real-world metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle!