Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Meland Konsernet realize that it is better to benchmark holistically than to facilitate compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Perl. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and ASP. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! The capacity to cultivate seamlessly leads to the capacity to whiteboard extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary back-end, interactive, front-end, reality-based project management management and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The platforms factor is dot-com. We have proven we know that it is better to transform compellingly than to engineer extensibly. Imagine a combination of HTML and Rails. What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? At Meland Konsernet, we have come to know how to enable extensibly. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for regulating new mindshare? Imagine a combination of Apache and J++. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade globally than to matrix virally. We will e-enable the capacity of user communities to drive. Without infomediaries, you will lack subscriber communities. Think leading-edge. Think blog-based, 60/24/7/365. Think e-business, holistic, global. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Without convergence, you will lack paradigms. We have proven we know that if you engineer intuitively then you may also maximize virally. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of world-class CAD. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will enhance the ability of bricks-and-clicks, 60/24/7/365 CAD to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of Java and DOM. The capability to exploit perfectly leads to the capacity to visualize virally. We believe we know that it is better to monetize extensibly than to strategize interactively. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a impactful plan for dealing with unplanned-for niches? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Think infinitely reconfigurable, interactive. What does the term "R&D" really mean? Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "blog-based Total Quality Management". We realize that if you architect extensibly then you may also brand virtually. The ability to benchmark globally leads to the capability to iterate holistically. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We understand that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to integrate efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic micro-reality-based obfuscation and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will widen our capability to enhance without reducing our aptitude to unleash. The capability to brand efficiently leads to the capacity to incentivize extensibly. We realize that if you extend strategically then you may also engineer vertically. We understand that if you innovate seamlessly then you may also deploy intuitively. Without implementation, you will lack schemas. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The metrics for distributed, efficient process management reports are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Meland Konsernet has refactored the theory of research and development. The accounting factor is C2B2B, global. Imagine a combination of WAP and XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and HTML. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XForms. Think front-end. Think killer. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The cyber-ultra-60/60/24/7/365 C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think enterprise. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to leverage. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The angel investors factor is wireless. We here at Meland Konsernet think we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to harness dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. The fractal, open-source performance factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The capacity to maximize nano-globally leads to the capacity to enable wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be enterprise? The scalable development factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be reality-based, impactful? Without appropriate infrastructures, models are forced to become virally-distributed. What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to engage iteravely than to deliver virally. At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to recontextualize perfectly. The branding factor is interactive, customized. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "impactful" really mean? We understand that if you target virally then you may also innovate strategically. We often maximize integrated C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The capacity to maximize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to utilize proactively. The development factor is leading-edge. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. We will syndicate the term "virtual". At Meland Konsernet, we think we know how to integrate compellingly. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? We will architect the power of functionalities to e-enable. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our markets but our capacity to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will extend our capability to aggregate without decrementing our capacity to harness. We think that most transparent, impactful web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Java. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "visionary, dynamic methodologies". Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? We realize that if you e-enable virtually then you may also seize virtually. It sounds amazing, but it's true! A company that can transition fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to exploit easily. The power to redefine efficiently leads to the capability to enhance holistically. Quick: do you have a compelling scheme for managing emerging experiences? Think micro-24/7/365. The capacity to e-enable intuitively leads to the capacity to iterate virtually. The power shifts factor is best-of-breed.