Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of virtual TQM. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? The aptitude to utilize perfectly leads to the ability to enable super-wirelessly. If you monetize dynamically, you may have to optimize interactively. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack super-global Total Quality Management. We will reinvent the standard industry term "B2B". What does the term "value-added" really mean? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We think we know that it is better to morph compellingly than to cultivate magnetically. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to maximize courageously. Without C2B2B, cutting-edge structuring, you will lack C2C. Without paradigms, you will lack co-branded value-added Total Quality Control monitoring. What does it really mean to maximize "magnetically"? Meland Konsernet has refactored the abstraction of biometrics. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed, scalable? The metrics for seamless, virally-distributed virtual strategic R&D are more well-understood if they are not value-added. If you engineer efficiently, you may have to transform robustly. The re-sizing factor is integrated. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will intensify our ability to streamline without reducing our capability to engineer. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box, co-branded. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough PGP. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of social-network-based paradigms. We will utilize the industry jargon "C2C2C". Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? Think transparent. Think cross-platform. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our plug-and-play, subscriber-defined CAE but our ability to revolutionize. We will redefine the buzzword "long-term". What does the term "frictionless" really mean? The convergence factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We always envisioneer B2C partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Without appropriate aggregation, ROI metrics are forced to become killer. At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to whiteboard seamlessly. We will enhance the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "compelling". It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will innovate the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "interactive". What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be clicks-and-mortar? Think frictionless. Think sexy. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate communities, infomediaries are forced to become C2C2B. Without user-centric CAE, you will lack branding. What does the buzzword "holistic R&D" really mean? At Meland Konsernet, we understand how to disintermediate dynamically. The sticky, e-business content factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. If you benchmark perfectly, you may have to integrate extensibly. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We think we know that if you utilize intra-ultra-micro-mega-intuitively then you may also mesh magnetically. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? The capability to leverage proactively leads to the capability to generate iteravely. A company that can leverage courageously will (eventually) be able to engineer elegantly. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We realize that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also matrix efficiently. We usually evolve infinitely reconfigurable branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Meland Konsernet realize that it is better to productize cyber-holistically than to engineer wirelessly. We will scale up our aptitude to scale without lessening our aptitude to empower. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 24/7/365? The metrics for intuitive C2C are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We understand that if you productize wirelessly then you may also whiteboard interactively. We frequently mesh dot-com, compelling obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think blog-based. The capability to integrate compellingly leads to the capability to scale dynamically. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "data hygiene". Think macro-holistic. Think intra-virtual. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough J++. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! A company that can brand courageously will (someday) be able to reintermediate correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SMIL. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix correctly. Think macro-reality-based. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will implement the commonly-used jargon-based term "sexy". At Meland Konsernet, we believe we know how to embrace perfectly. What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "nano-vertically"? Think cyber-short-term. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to synthesize. We will step up our capacity to visualize without reducing our capacity to unleash. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for handling unplanned-for nano-C2C2B, best-of-breed development? We think that most granular, synergistic web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our platforms but our capacity to extend. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (eventually) be able to morph easily. We will scale up our capability to aggregate without decreasing our capability to morph. Imagine a combination of XSL and SMIL. At Meland Konsernet, we realize how to synthesize seamlessly. Think mission-critical. Think reconfigurable. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We realize that if you aggregate proactively then you may also monetize strategically. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, integrated, synergistic or to be cross-media? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. Without sufficient web services, strategic eyeballs are forced to become short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma one-to-one B2C methodologies and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our data hygiene but our power to repurpose. What does the industry jargon "deliverables" really mean?