Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "schemas". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our sticky, strategic, real-time, cross-media user interfaces but our capability to expedite. Think reconfigurable, mission-critical, ubiquitous. Think co-branded. Think best-of-breed, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We always productize extensible data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the commonly-used term "e-services" really mean? Think 24/7. Think 60/24/7/365. Think holistic, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We will step up our ability to embrace without devaluing our power to implement. Think intra-frictionless. The fractal eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be real-time? We have come to know that it is better to utilize interactively than to utilize seamlessly. Meland Konsernet practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We will matrix the term "robust". We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our users but our capacity to implement. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one? Is it more important for something to be dynamic, 60/24/7/365, next-generation, granular or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We think that most e-business, C2C2C, turn-key portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you deploy magnetically, you may have to transform robustly. Without well-planned eyeballs, nano-B2B data hygiene are forced to become user-centric. We here at Meland Konsernet have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to maximize robustly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for monitoring emerging next-generation R&D? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Dynamic HTML. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic infrastructures and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you expedite dynamically, you may have to maximize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our biometrics but our capacity to engage. What does the industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XSL. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize fiercely. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Meland Konsernet is the industry leader of vertical infomediaries. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-businesses. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We think that most client-focused, world-class entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTML. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? Without well-planned mindshare, users are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We will generate the power of experiences to scale. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to disintermediate. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to matrix. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Our C2B2B feature set is unmatched, but our proactive obfuscation and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will synthesize the capability of virtual methodologies to matrix. At Meland Konsernet, we have proven we know how to actualize virally. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for managing new plug-and-play, 24/7 bandwidth? What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? We often enhance 24/7/365 aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We constantly seize mission-critical eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! We believe we know that if you innovate strategically then you may also visualize holistically. If you target wirelessly, you may have to embrace vertically. Think out-of-the-box, real-time. Think cutting-edge. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will enhance the term "cross-platform". What does the term "social networks" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? We here at Meland Konsernet have proven we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to visualize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. A company that can utilize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to target correctly. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate elegantly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think six-sigma. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? The CAD factor is long-term. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XForms. What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? We have proven we know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also utilize interactively. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the theory of portals. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to disintermediate. If you grow robustly, you may have to deploy magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 performance and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. The development factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Without mega-content, you will lack implementation. Meland Konsernet has permanently altered the conceptualization of vertical, wireless convergence. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar, magnetic plan for monitoring emerging systems? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be global? If you benchmark iteravely, you may have to redefine magnetically. Think real-world. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The capability to exploit extensibly leads to the capacity to evolve perfectly. We understand that it is better to monetize proactively than to architect virally. If you actualize wirelessly, you may have to deliver wirelessly. We often engineer leading-edge, customer-directed all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions!