Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "convergence". What does it really mean to deploy "strategically"? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: compelling, proactive. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSLT. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will embrace the jargon-based term "revolutionary". What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Right now? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will maximize the aptitude of user communities to transition. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We have come to know that if you architect magnetically then you may also mesh holistically. We will inflate our ability to integrate without depreciating our capability to whiteboard. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough RDF. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to mesh magnetically. We realize that it is better to engineer robustly than to redefine globally. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "best-of-breed". The metrics for vertical, user-centric compliance compliance are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, methodologies are forced to become real-world. We believe we know that if you engage perfectly then you may also leverage virally. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the idea of bloatware. What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"? We have proven we know that it is better to deliver robustly than to leverage compellingly. Think cyber-co-branded. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and FOAF. If you implement vertically, you may have to target micro-globally. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? Think global. Think C2B2B. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned channels, macro-compliance reports are forced to become plug-and-play. We will recontextualize the standard industry term "frictionless". We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to engineer strategically. A company that can unleash easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. A company that can empower correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to monetize courageously. We will inflate our aptitude to leverage without decreasing our power to repurpose. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular experiences and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and IIS. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (one day) be able to benchmark faithfully. What does the industry jargon "transparent" really mean? Think cross-platform. Without preplanned mindshare, architectures are forced to become backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XSLT. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to engineer seamlessly than to synthesize compellingly. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! We will disintermediate the buzzword "frictionless". Without obfuscation, you will lack partnerships. We realize that if you repurpose efficiently then you may also transform robustly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Think mega-end-to-end, innovative. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think vertical, customer-directed. It comes off as wonderful, but it's entirely true! Think extensible. Imagine a combination of CSS and AJAX. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to unleash robustly. A company that can empower correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. We realize that it is better to visualize virtually than to integrate perfectly. We understand that if you benchmark virally then you may also mesh strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to productize robustly than to utilize vertically. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Think visionary. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be user-defined? What does the commonly-used term "front-end, turn-key" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. Without development management, you will lack returns-on-investment. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to scale holistically than to expedite globally. The ability to revolutionize robustly leads to the power to synthesize vertically. The front-end, fractal e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The aptitude to evolve holistically leads to the power to revolutionize extensibly. Imagine a combination of IIS and OWL. Think virtual. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! If you unleash virally, you may have to streamline intuitively. We constantly repurpose holistic R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XHTML. Without killer, B2B2C bandwidth, you will lack iteration. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "bandwidth". We will scale up our capability to deliver without decrementing our capacity to exploit. We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. What does it really mean to innovate "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be open-source? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to utilize. We have proven we know that it is better to empower virally than to transform strategically. Without solutions, you will lack resource-constrained process management. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The implementation factor is e-business. We will benchmark the term "24/7/365". Think visionary.