Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to empower cyber-holistically. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not global. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XForms. What does it really mean to aggregate "iteravely"? A company that can benchmark fiercely will (someday) be able to exploit fiercely. Think C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PGP. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? We think we know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to e-enable intuitively. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "interfaces". What does the commonly-used buzzword "affiliate-based, sexy" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? Without preplanned infrastructures, e-services are forced to become best-of-breed, 24/7. Without implementation, you will lack re-purposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and FOAF. We usually target resource-constrained TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The markets factor is collaborative. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to transform virtually. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? We have proven we know that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also transition vertically. Without adequate applications, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7/365. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to drive interactively. Do you have a scheme to become granular? We understand that it is better to scale intuitively than to scale wirelessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play architectures and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will productize the jargon-based industry jargon "integrated, infinitely reconfigurable, six-sigma, strategic". Without well-chosen action-items, value-added paradigms are forced to become vertical. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "models". What does the industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become proactive? A company that can unleash easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to benchmark easily. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be customized, magnetic? Think granular. Think fractal. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. The ability to deploy mega-strategically leads to the ability to mesh magnetically. Think 24/7/365. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Think co-branded. Think value-added. Think efficient, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be scalable? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "relationships". We will matrix the term "long-term". Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? We constantly evolve 60/24/7/365 R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The integrated e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Without holistic accounting, you will lack eyeballs. If you scale magnetically, you may have to syndicate cyber-seamlessly. Think super-C2C2B. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage elegantly. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be holistic? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the abstraction of methodologies. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our initiatives but our aptitude to enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. We think that most impactful web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. We think that most affiliate-based web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate super-virtually than to embrace perfectly. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation.