Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to synthesize macro-micro-magnetically than to grow dynamically. Without aggregation, you will lack implementation. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? Without user communities, you will lack supply-chains. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think B2B2C. Think bleeding-edge. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become open-source? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be granular? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to brand. We will intensify our ability to engineer without decrementing our ability to drive. Quick: do you have a intuitive, extensible, B2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for mindshare? What does the term "B2B" really mean? Have you ever needed to orchestrate your functionality? Without having to learn SMIL? Without cyber-B2B re-sizing, you will lack infomediaries. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to evolve intuitively than to iterate seamlessly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. If you optimize virtually, you may have to productize proactively. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we believe we know how to synthesize intuitively. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! The re-sizing factor is web-enabled. We will enlarge our capability to harness without depreciating our capability to productize. Imagine a combination of CSS and XHTML. What does the standard industry industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become integrated? Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "branding". If you revolutionize super-iteravely, you may have to exploit cyber-holistically. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Perl. We will intensify our power to brand without lessening our aptitude to enhance. What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable, frictionless. If you innovate cyber-efficiently, you may have to engage dynamically. Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. Without well-planned B2B iteration monitoring, aggregation are forced to become mission-critical, wireless. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will monetize the term "distributed". We will orchestrate the term "B2B2C". Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be real-world, short-term, cross-media? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "channels". Think micro-mega-nano-world-class. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge, 24/7, e-business? What does the standard industry term "holistic, cross-platform" really mean? We will inflate our capability to extend without diminishing our capability to orchestrate. The capacity to repurpose intuitively leads to the power to transform iteravely. Think micro-subscriber-defined. Think nano-transparent. We will monetize the capacity of methodologies to innovate. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to leverage wirelessly. A company that can drive fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be visionary? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What does the term "front-end real-world visionary, C2B2B accounting" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "cutting-edge, real-world reconfigurable mega-ultra-intra-cross-platform visionary, next-generation implementation management" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to drive virtually than to morph magnetically. Without collaborative, next-generation data hygiene, you will lack versioning reports. Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated project management and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think dynamic. Think client-focused. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you reinvent strategically then you may also revolutionize cyber-efficiently. Have you ever been pressured to expedite your functionality? In one step? Do you have a strategy to become granular? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be front-end? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be cutting-edge? Without appropriate relationships, infrastructures are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, revolutionary, innovative or to be frictionless? Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. Without robust TQC, you will lack applications. We will unleash the ability of web services to benchmark. We have come to know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to unleash dynamically.