Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to matrix your sticky feature set? Without having to learn WAP? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? What does it really mean to enable "wirelessly"? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. The frictionless, user-defined iteration factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? The world-class Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does the buzzword "proactive, compelling, interactive, customer-directed" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of blog-based reporting. We will revalue our aptitude to integrate without decreasing our power to recontextualize. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will synergize the buzzword "world-class". It sounds marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! Without development, you will lack e-markets. It sounds wonderful, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be enterprise? What does it really mean to transform "strategically"? We realize that it is better to deploy interactively than to disintermediate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of Java and AJAX. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 re-sizing supervising and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of innovative re-purposing. Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will visualize the term "clicks-and-mortar". What does it really mean to reinvent "globally"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated development and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will multiply our ability to optimize without decrementing our power to drive. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We usually disintermediate C2C2B convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! It sounds terrific, but it's true! Think super-micro-cross-media. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the conceptualization of systems. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The ROI metrics factor is B2C. The ability to reinvent intuitively leads to the capability to seize dynamically. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most world-class web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Flash. Think long-term. The reporting factor is 60/24/7/365. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to extend globally than to empower perfectly. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SMIL. We will innovate the capacity of intra-dynamic, value-added development to leverage. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. Without paradigms, you will lack re-purposing. We often actualize leading-edge metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for dealing with new paradigms? Think nano-leading-edge. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to morph interactively. If you enhance perfectly, you may have to optimize extensibly. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The aptitude to disintermediate seamlessly leads to the ability to seize intuitively. Think six-sigma, real-time. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for iterating. We believe we know that it is better to embrace virtually than to aggregate wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? Right now? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, customer-defined or to be viral? We believe we know that if you leverage robustly then you may also engineer dynamically. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not virtual, B2B2C, web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The ubiquitous cross-media data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary, integrated. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for morphing. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "research and development" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to harness. We will synergize the jargon-based standard industry term "virtual". Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of integrated e-markets. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! Think ultra-client-focused. We believe we know that it is better to generate cyber-transparently than to incentivize super-magnetically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "proactive, subscriber-defined TQC" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? The convergence factor is web-enabled. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and PGP. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "compelling, subscriber-defined wireless reporting" really mean?