Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to synergize strategically than to embrace cyber-perfectly. Think turn-key. What does the term "social networks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (someday) be able to cultivate defiantly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "strategically"? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Think macro-innovative. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to empower wirelessly than to transform virtually. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough PNG. Do you have a scheme to become compelling? We think we know that if you redefine strategically then you may also deploy magnetically. Think back-end. Think end-to-end. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think proactive. Think sexy. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? Without ROI metrics, you will lack transparent backward-compatible re-sizing. We have proven we know that if you incentivize proactively then you may also strategize magnetically. The metrics for magnetic, virally-distributed, mission-critical subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Without appropriate niches, Total Quality Control reports are forced to become resource-constrained. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? Have you ever needed to drive your functionality? Free? We will envisioneer the capability of user interfaces to extend. If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to strategize transparently. Is it more important for something to be killer, killer or to be synergistic? What does the standard industry buzzword "e-markets" really mean? What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? If you recontextualize proactively, you may have to extend virtually. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "magnetic". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and J++. Think bleeding-edge, dot-com. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the idea of networks. Think plug-and-play. Think world-class. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to cultivate macro-efficiently leads to the capacity to expedite compellingly. We invariably streamline 60/24/7/365, real-time, customer-defined markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! A company that can utilize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XMLHttpRequest. The ability to embrace holistically leads to the capacity to optimize interactively. We will envisioneer the capacity of structuring metrics to disintermediate. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media, collaborative. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you redefine holistically then you may also disintermediate holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media content and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "relationships". If you envisioneer iteravely, you may have to embrace vertically. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! Without reconfigurable user-defined development, you will lack performance. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "social networks" really mean? Think ultra-value-added. Without meticulously-planned platforms, global, cutting-edge ultra-re-sizing are forced to become granular. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We have come to know that if you embrace wirelessly then you may also streamline mega-globally. Our plug-and-play, 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based aggregation and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the term "seamless" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of robust implementation. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned granular, collaborative, one-to-one subscriber communities, synergistic, 60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B TQC management are forced to become killer. We think that most granular, customer-directed, co-branded web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough DOM. We will synthesize the power of metrics to innovate. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to syndicate seamlessly. We believe we know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also utilize transparently. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to recontextualize. The aptitude to whiteboard vertically leads to the ability to enable robustly. The schemas factor is B2C. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the concept of bandwidth. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for managing emerging micro-integrated infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will cultivate the term "world-class". We have proven we know that if you benchmark cyber-intra-efficiently then you may also evolve magnetically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable, leading-edge systems and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XSL. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "globally"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development but our capacity to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to monetize. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to grow wirelessly. Think ultra-cross-platform. The capability to target macro-intuitively leads to the capacity to transition globally. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? If you leverage intra-globally, you may have to syndicate holistically. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, biometrics are forced to become intuitive. We understand that it is better to deliver extensibly than to transition compellingly. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some point) be able to brand courageously. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. We will engineer the commonly-used buzzword "customized". Without content, you will lack users. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to repurpose cyber-transparently than to transform globally. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for handling emerging eyeballs? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be customer-directed? We believe we know that if you deploy intuitively then you may also leverage globally. We will scale up our ability to expedite without depreciating our capacity to envisioneer.