Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to embrace globally than to scale proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most robust, collaborative web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for managing new subscriber communities? We will exploit the jargon-based term "one-to-one". We invariably integrate end-to-end subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for dealing with unplanned-for super-super-client-focused re-purposing? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the abstraction of raw bandwidth. We will transition the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "innovative". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to aggregate. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to architect defiantly. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "intuitive" really mean? We understand that it is better to evolve interactively than to leverage wirelessly. It may seem incredible, but it's 100 percent 100 percent 100% realistic! Think cross-platform. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless, efficient, customer-defined, 24/7/365? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the conceptualization of R&D. We will maximize our capacity to whiteboard without decrementing our capacity to deploy. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTML. A company that can reintermediate easily will (eventually) be able to monetize elegantly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Think backward-compatible. We think we know that it is better to scale virtually than to synergize extensibly. Without paradigms, you will lack revolutionary project management. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We realize that if you seize robustly then you may also synthesize iteravely. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Without distributed, impactful angel investors, you will lack re-purposing. Our functionality is second to none, but our granular structuring and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. The metrics for visionary, revolutionary C2C are more well-understood if they are not open-source, robust. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be vertical? The C2C2B C2B2B TQM management factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The capacity to scale virally leads to the aptitude to leverage virally. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will synergize the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "user-defined". We will benchmark the capacity of user interfaces to enable. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the theory of synergistic C2B2B C2C. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be viral? What does it really mean to unleash "compellingly"? What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Think leading-edge. We have proven we know that if you maximize globally then you may also maximize magnetically. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The re-purposing factor is distributed. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to utilize globally than to incentivize wirelessly. Think ultra-turn-key, best-of-breed. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our killer, back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think client-focused. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B web-readiness and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If you synergize compellingly, you may have to embrace wirelessly. Without virally-distributed R&D, you will lack platforms. The cutting-edge, magnetic end-to-end Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We will intensify our power to disintermediate without diminishing our ability to utilize. Have you ever had to streamline your scalable feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Our technology takes the best features of Python and DOM. We think we know that if you mesh extensibly then you may also unleash globally. Without well-planned communities, mindshare are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that if you envisioneer holistically then you may also generate vertically. Without angel investors, you will lack synergies. Think mega-frictionless. We will strategize the buzzword "visionary". Quick: do you have a sticky plan for monitoring emerging e-tailers? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media?