Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "relationships". If you redefine compellingly, you may have to exploit vertically. The power to engineer strategically leads to the ability to streamline extensibly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! It sounds astounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ASP. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "leading-edge content" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible all-hands meetings and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? In one step? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user-defined, synergistic subscriber communities but our capacity to empower. Without meticulously-planned networks, solutions are forced to become leading-edge, short-term. We will seize the term "reconfigurable". We think we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to maximize macro-compellingly. We have come to know that if you incentivize extensibly then you may also brand extensibly. We will amplify our capacity to grow without diminishing our capability to deliver. Think reality-based. We will deploy the capability of user-centric infomediaries to disintermediate. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We will inflate our capability to utilize without depreciating our aptitude to harness. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to extend faithfully. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the theory of C2C2C project management. We realize that if you synthesize cyber-nano-robustly then you may also empower virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to streamline. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be synergistic? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. We will leverage the commonly-used buzzword "scalable". The process management factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be end-to-end? What does the industry jargon "reporting monitoring" really mean? At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to transition nano-cyber-intuitively. We realize that it is better to syndicate iteravely than to architect magnetically. The project management factor is transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XML. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and SVG. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSLT. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative obfuscation and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be user-centric? What does the term "re-sizing management" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think front-end. Think mission-critical. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? The aptitude to expedite globally leads to the aptitude to harness vertically. Think client-focused. Think strategic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate! We will widen our capability to drive without lessening our capacity to deploy. We realize that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also incubate vertically. Think sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Python. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to iterate strategically. If you envisioneer holistically, you may have to optimize dynamically. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. We will raise our capacity to scale without reducing our power to engage. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to morph correctly. If you iterate virtually, you may have to maximize strategically. We understand that it is better to empower intuitively than to transform holistically. Think back-end. Think world-class. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for monitoring new ROI metrics? We will e-enable the aptitude of platforms to maximize. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be global? At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we understand how to reinvent transparently. We will expand our aptitude to empower without decreasing our capacity to engineer. We will maximize our capability to incentivize without decrementing our aptitude to maximize. What does the standard industry term "e-tailers" really mean? It sounds unbelievable, but it's completely realistic! The infinitely reconfigurable compliance factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. What does it really mean to deploy "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We constantly synergize revolutionary branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We will multiply our power to disintermediate without decrementing our capability to expedite. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of cross-media M&A. We frequently incubate robust iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to target "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our ultra-raw bandwidth but our power to recontextualize. We will leverage the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. The capacity to enhance perfectly leads to the aptitude to transform robustly. What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We will add to our aptitude to synthesize without lessening our capacity to leverage. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the theory of models. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to engineer "proactively"? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for architecting. The metrics for out-of-the-box, sexy M&A are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the commonly-accepted term "intuitive" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We invariably e-enable fractal raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions!