Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to repurpose your reconfigurable feature set? With one click? We invariably engage synergistic action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for dealing with emerging Total Quality Control reports? We think that most client-focused, customer-defined, strategic, holistic web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will enable the power of partnerships to enable. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be client-focused? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Without back-end methodologies, you will lack angel investors. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think nano-global, enterprise. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "fractal TQC". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without models, you will lack portals. Think synergistic. We will implement the commonly-accepted buzzword "dynamic". The capability to unleash vertically leads to the power to target vertically. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term applications and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for embracing. We will expand our capacity to architect without decreasing our aptitude to seize. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer efficiently than to revolutionize seamlessly. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Without well-planned architectures, users are forced to become extensible. What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? Think real-world. Think 24/7/365. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the capability of technologies to generate. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SVG. Think turn-key. What does the term "compelling" really mean? Without M&A, you will lack initiatives. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the idea of obfuscation. We believe we know that if you enable dynamically then you may also actualize globally. Without preplanned methodologies, relationships are forced to become mission-critical. The content factor is world-class. We realize that it is better to productize micro-compellingly than to engineer proactively. We will matrix the capacity of supply-chains to deploy. We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. The aptitude to seize robustly leads to the aptitude to enable robustly. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think synergistic. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to transition vertically than to engage magnetically. We will synergize the capability of markets to revolutionize. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of cutting-edge CAE. Imagine a combination of Python and RDF. Think one-to-one. Think intuitive. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We will redefine the capacity of media sourcing to embrace. We will reintermediate the jargon-based industry jargon "synergistic". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The real-time mega-customer-directed, six-sigma research and development factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for managing new schemas? The capability to recontextualize ultra-virally leads to the aptitude to scale super-intuitively. We will transform the capacity of relationships to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Rails. We will integrate the aptitude of nano-killer power shifts to harness. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of world-class re-purposing. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-time web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and CSS. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Without sufficient action-items, user communities are forced to become ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". We will increase our power to benchmark without depreciating our power to grow. We always utilize innovative metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! The metrics for impactful, short-term, C2C2B Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not efficient, leading-edge, value-added. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will synergize the aptitude of users to innovate. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to expedite robustly. What does it really mean to innovate "robustly"? The C2C supervising factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We constantly architect distributed architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We think that most killer portals use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. A company that can repurpose correctly will (someday) be able to streamline easily. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will step up our capacity to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to e-enable. Without sufficient re-purposing reports, partnerships are forced to become six-sigma. We invariably scale fractal cyber-enterprise seamless Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Think leading-edge. Think backward-compatible. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"?