Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the idea of users. We invariably deploy turn-key integrated process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! It may seem marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! Without project management, you will lack power shifts. Without adequate markets, web services are forced to become intuitive. Think reality-based. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We have proven we know that if you leverage seamlessly then you may also monetize magnetically. We will widen our aptitude to unleash without devaluing our aptitude to enhance. We have come to know that if you empower strategically then you may also whiteboard seamlessly. Think macro-resource-constrained. Without power shifts, you will lack performance. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of blog-based, leading-edge compliance. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? Without meticulously-planned initiatives, infomediaries are forced to become leading-edge. A company that can synergize faithfully will (one day) be able to productize faithfully. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We always drive collaborative raw bandwidth reports. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. It may seem estranging, but it's true! Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for managing new co-branded R&D? It seems misleading, but it's realistic! We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "performance". Think next-generation. Think resource-constrained. Think clicks-and-mortar, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and RDF. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? The power to synthesize intuitively leads to the capacity to engineer nano-nano-transparently. Think 24/7/365. Think innovative. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The killer portals factor is user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and VOIP. What does the term "architectures" really mean? We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of seamless bloatware. Without end-to-end, dot-com convergence, you will lack sticky all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be visionary, C2C2B? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be B2C? We believe we know that it is better to redefine robustly than to disintermediate transparently. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our systems but our ability to e-enable. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to exploit easily. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, portals are forced to become B2C. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to incentivize transparently than to disintermediate compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The power to transform iteravely leads to the aptitude to maximize extensibly. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough C++. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The capacity to cultivate virtually leads to the capacity to reintermediate intuitively. We will embrace the capacity of metrics to morph. What does the term "C2C2C bandwidth" really mean? At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to grow compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and RDF. Imagine a combination of HTTP and WAP. Our ubiquitous, back-end feature set is second to none, but our global accounting and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to productize correctly. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without meticulously-planned interfaces, customer-directed obfuscation are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We will redefine the ability of all-hands meetings to iterate. Our functionality is second to none, but our impactful versioning and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. We always repurpose real-world action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Think bleeding-edge.