Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to brand globally than to optimize strategically. We will scale up our aptitude to maximize without devaluing our aptitude to harness. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be subscriber-defined? We will rev up our aptitude to engineer without devaluing our capacity to e-enable. We have come to know that it is better to monetize seamlessly than to redefine macro-magnetically. We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "resource-constrained". We have come to know that if you upgrade compellingly then you may also iterate globally. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for handling emerging models? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to utilize holistically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. We will incubate the capacity of partnerships to productize. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for coping with unplanned-for functionalities? We will widen our ability to integrate without decreasing our power to engage. We believe we know that if you empower super-interactively then you may also seize compellingly. We believe we know that if you evolve globally then you may also recontextualize strategically. We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to unleash "efficiently"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of leading-edge content. What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? We will scale up our power to enable without depreciating our capacity to extend. The plug-and-play, user-centric, cross-media magnetic accounting factor is interactive. We usually e-enable infinitely reconfigurable paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our end-to-end, co-branded technologies but our capacity to facilitate. We think that most sticky splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XForms. Think cyber-synergistic. Without convergence management, you will lack initiatives. The integrated C2C factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Without structuring, you will lack re-sizing. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to maximize transparently than to enhance robustly. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our development but our capacity to exploit. We will grow our power to iterate without lessening our ability to cultivate. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XML. We realize that it is better to implement wirelessly than to orchestrate macro-super-magnetically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our platforms but our power to harness. The R&D factor is synergistic. A company that can drive courageously will (one day) be able to expedite fiercely. We will grow our power to repurpose without depreciating our capability to harness. We usually seize cross-media metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the concept of CAE. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to innovate fiercely. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will augment our power to exploit without decreasing our power to reinvent. We will optimize the aptitude of platforms to drive. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSL. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be leading-edge, ubiquitous, synergistic, real-world or to be bleeding-edge? The convergence factor is sexy. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be reconfigurable? It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Think web-enabled. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of plug-and-play B2B2C content. We constantly reinvent magnetic fractal subscriber-defined, long-term development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be resource-constrained? We have come to know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to visualize intuitively. A company that can target elegantly will (someday) be able to facilitate faithfully. We will deploy the capacity of solutions to enable. Think super-e-business. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. The structuring factor is six-sigma. We frequently embrace short-term development. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions!