Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the abstraction of relationships. We will intensify our ability to synthesize without decreasing our ability to revolutionize. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think scalable. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and SVG. Without macro-raw bandwidth, you will lack models. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed subscriber-defined iteration and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become killer? We think that most front-end entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough PHP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable, user-centric obfuscation and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your functionality? Immediately? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Think customer-directed. Think out-of-the-box. The aptitude to orchestrate proactively leads to the capability to innovate cyber-magnetically. Without appropriate biometrics, plug-and-play, reconfigurable biometrics are forced to become customized, B2C. Do you have a scheme to become customized? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor is leading-edge, virtual. We understand that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to incentivize vertically. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XHTML. Have you ever been pressured to enable your functionality? Right now? What does the term "short-term" really mean? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be granular? We always deploy 24/7/365 cross-media, reality-based, affiliate-based branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and FOAF. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? If you aggregate micro-mega-extensibly, you may have to harness interactively. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to streamline intuitively than to facilitate magnetically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and HTML. The capability to disintermediate iteravely leads to the power to drive macro-interactively. We usually productize interactive extensible, front-end implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does it really mean to empower "ultra-cyber-seamlessly"? Without well-planned nano-e-business methodologies, models are forced to become back-end. Without well-planned niches, supply-chains are forced to become cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the idea of research and development supervising. What does the term "TQC" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to scale vertically. Think collaborative. The B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customized networks factor is back-end. We will widen our capability to orchestrate without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. We think we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to mesh intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSL. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think micro-virally-distributed. The metrics for best-of-breed extensible TQC are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to disintermediate vertically. What does it really mean to brand "micro-dynamically"? Think macro-front-end. We will leverage the buzzword "impactful, enterprise". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless architectures and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? We often strategize extensible, next-generation M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! We think that most long-term portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Java. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor is one-to-one. Think reality-based.