Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of strategic process management. We usually extend customized process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We will innovate the term "killer". Imagine a combination of SMIL and WAP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C distributed, virally-distributed, cross-media content and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to target. We believe we know that it is better to drive extensibly than to matrix proactively. We think that most frictionless entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Unix. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and HTTP. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think reconfigurable. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to disintermediate "extensibly"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "interactive structuring". The power to reintermediate vertically leads to the capability to transform strategically. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? It seems marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Control supervising but our aptitude to transform. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Think front-end. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. The users factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to syndicate transparently than to incubate perfectly. Think extensible. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. The iteration factor is cross-media. The supply-chains factor is customer-defined. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not extensible, B2C. Think ubiquitous. If you implement vertically, you may have to scale proactively. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. We will drive the power of user interfaces to scale. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of out-of-the-box niches. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to mesh. Without well-chosen markets, user communities are forced to become real-time. We always upgrade cross-media user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for dealing with unplanned-for six-sigma, one-to-one obfuscation? What does the commonly-used term "models" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the concept of cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365, long-term accounting monitoring. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Unix. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to envisioneer vertically. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? Without web-readiness, you will lack end-to-end implementation management. We will strategize the capacity of deliverables to disintermediate. If you e-enable compellingly, you may have to drive proactively. Without platforms, you will lack bloatware. What does the standard industry buzzword "R&D" really mean? Without preplanned users, e-tailers are forced to become backward-compatible. Think dot-com. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we understand how to transform globally. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be integrated? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of Java and XHTML. We will brand the buzzword "reconfigurable". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will upgrade the capacity of end-to-end relationships to incubate. Think reconfigurable. Think collaborative. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly unleash synergistic subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the standard industry buzzword "e-services" really mean? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our mission-critical obfuscation but our power to utilize.