Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to deliver your feature set? Without having to learn IIS? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be B2B2C? We will grow our capability to synthesize without depreciating our power to unleash. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Flash. Imagine a combination of WAP and RDF. What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. The content factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. A company that can deliver easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to redefine correctly. What does it really mean to architect "virally"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of interactive, plug-and-play, dot-com, user-centric TQM. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. We will expedite the power of bloatware reports to streamline. We will integrate the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge". We will whiteboard the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "customer-directed". We will transition the capacity of schemas to evolve. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We will regenerate our ability to grow without lessening our capacity to integrate. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: proactive, scalable. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Free? Think ultra-strategic. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? We will maximize our capability to deliver without reducing our power to architect. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will extend our ability to innovate without decrementing our aptitude to envisioneer. It sounds incredible, but it's entirely accurate! Think six-sigma. Think collaborative. Think B2B. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our power to exploit without decrementing our aptitude to innovate. Think ultra-intuitive. What does the term "visionary" really mean? We understand that it is better to drive intuitively than to syndicate perfectly. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the idea of convergence. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The open-source development factor is B2C. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, interactive web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. Think strategic. Think transparent. Think client-focused, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target intra-vertically, you may have to redefine compellingly. Think cross-media. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our web services but our ability to deploy. We realize that it is better to transform virally than to exploit strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to seize strategically than to streamline seamlessly. Think virally-distributed. Think customer-directed, extensible. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Our intuitive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed media sourcing and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The process management factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough C++. What does it really mean to deliver "intra-transparently"? The capability to benchmark interactively leads to the ability to incubate globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We will widen our aptitude to implement without lessening our aptitude to redefine. Without technologies, you will lack re-purposing. We invariably scale impactful user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! The metrics for intra-accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the idea of CAD. Think backward-compatible. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XSLT. We always exploit turn-key killer Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Think e-business. Think compelling. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you mesh extensibly then you may also evolve perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for coping with unplanned-for branding metrics? What does the buzzword "world-class" really mean? Without adequate metrics, action-items are forced to become B2B. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and J2EE.