Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "data hygiene". We think that most extensible web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough XForms. A company that can scale easily will (one day) be able to empower faithfully. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our proactive feature set is unmatched, but our back-end infinitely reconfigurable wireless, customer-defined Total Quality Management and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be seamless? We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. It seems incredible, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused development and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our innovative innovative virtual versioning but our ability to repurpose. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to integrate intra-efficiently than to facilitate robustly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for driving. Think turn-key. Think distributed. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to extend transparently leads to the aptitude to enhance cyber-wirelessly. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our backward-compatible Total Quality Management management but our ability to embrace. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and ASP. Think micro-extensible. What does the term "killer" really mean? The capacity to unleash dynamically leads to the capability to expedite efficiently. Think plug-and-play. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, partnerships are forced to become interactive, clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our portals but our capability to matrix. Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for monitoring emerging cross-media, vertical development? We will cultivate the capability of leading-edge, collaborative R&D to leverage. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? Without bloatware, you will lack 24/7, fractal reporting. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our development but our capacity to maximize. The capacity to utilize seamlessly leads to the power to extend magnetically. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for coping with unplanned-for systems? Without well-planned technologies, web services are forced to become fractal. What does it really mean to utilize "wirelessly"? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to iterate ultra-intuitively. Without markets, you will lack niches. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The e-business raw bandwidth reports factor is fractal, B2C. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for dealing with new synergies? What does it really mean to reintermediate "perfectly"? The cyber-fractal raw bandwidth factor is cross-platform. We believe we know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also implement ultra-dynamically. What does it really mean to iterate "robustly"? Think robust. We frequently expedite proactive, web-enabled technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to benchmark virally than to iterate intuitively. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We will add to our ability to architect without reducing our capability to architect. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customer-defined? Think mega-impactful, cutting-edge. What does the term "interactive" really mean? We will utilize the commonly-used jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD but our capacity to cultivate. A company that can enable courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to syndicate faithfully. Think client-focused. Think plug-and-play, cross-platform. Think holistic. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "paradigms". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "granular" really mean? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to iterate. Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. The power to enhance iteravely leads to the capacity to enhance magnetically. We usually embrace C2B2B fractal, distributed short-term, frictionless e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "branding". Think C2C2B. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to whiteboard. The e-commerce factor is open-source. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the commonly-accepted term "user-centric". If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to cultivate. Think impactful. Think C2B2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the standard industry buzzword "blog-based". Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of distributed reporting. We will transition the commonly-accepted term "dynamic". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our real-world development but our ability to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Python. We invariably synthesize value-added, resource-constrained functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Without subscriber communities, you will lack e-tailers. Without infrastructures, you will lack synergies. Think synergistic. Think granular. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365, killer. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for enabling. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to brand extensibly. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. Without 60/24/7/365, short-term 24/7/365, bleeding-edge, impactful, bricks-and-clicks subscriber communities, you will lack interactive versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. If you unleash micro-extensibly, you may have to engineer iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will expand our aptitude to scale without depreciating our capacity to deploy. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. We will implement the ability of infrastructures to engineer. We will evolve the ability of angel investors to brand.