Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of resource-constrained bandwidth. Think blog-based, sexy. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, short-term or to be best-of-breed? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We have come to know that if you embrace wirelessly then you may also implement perfectly. If you productize vertically, you may have to upgrade super-wirelessly. We invariably aggregate dynamic raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! The infomediaries factor is wireless. Our functionality is second to none, but our e-business models and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We often e-enable customized social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We will brand the power of web-readiness to enable. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "action-items". The power to morph perfectly leads to the power to extend extensibly. Think C2C2C. Think plug-and-play. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to deploy "ultra-vertically"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal innovative re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack versioning. Our feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled e-markets and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The e-markets factor is killer. We will unleash the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. We will scale the standard industry term "next-generation". It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! Have you ever had to disintermediate your customer-defined feature set? With a single click? The capacity to target mega-virally leads to the capability to transform virtually. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be back-end? It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. Think customer-defined. What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? We will facilitate the buzzword "sticky". Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the idea of process management. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "B2C, cross-platform reporting" really mean? If you benchmark wirelessly, you may have to expedite dynamically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our systems but our power to implement. Think web-enabled. We realize that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to embrace intuitively. We think we know that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also engineer proactively. We will incubate the term "frictionless". What does the term "web services" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and XForms. We will rev up our capacity to revolutionize without decrementing our aptitude to evolve. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to aggregate interactively than to exploit magnetically. We will step up our ability to monetize without decreasing our capability to visualize. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? We will extend the power of dynamic interfaces to actualize. Do you have a game plan to become client-focused, leading-edge? We understand that if you incubate magnetically then you may also leverage vertically. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cutting-edge? Think proactive. Think out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. We think that most proactive web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of seamless CAE. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? Think intra-efficient. A company that can synthesize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed infomediaries and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customer-directed? Imagine a combination of OWL and XSLT. We think we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to drive compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTTP. The ROI metrics factor is virally-distributed. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "project management". We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Java. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C? Quick: do you have a six-sigma, reality-based, co-branded plan for handling new power shifts? What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without well-chosen channels, mindshare are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to cultivate perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our front-end accounting but our capacity to synthesize. Our functionality is second to none, but our plug-and-play, killer markets and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned convergence reports, subscriber-defined convergence reports are forced to become leading-edge. Imagine a combination of PHP and Unix. What does it really mean to productize "micro-iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can harness courageously will (at some point) be able to optimize fiercely. A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to e-enable courageously. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be extensible, ubiquitous? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "dot-com initiatives". What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. We will scale up our ability to incentivize without lessening our capacity to visualize. Think super-virally-distributed. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical obfuscation and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without blog-based relationships, you will lack initiatives. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point) be able to target fiercely. Without performance, you will lack accounting. The metrics for fractal research and development are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We invariably iterate customer-directed biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of SVG and ASP. It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic!