Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your functionality? With one click? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to disintermediate. Without users, you will lack project management. Think mega-long-term. The deliverables factor is magnetic. Without user interfaces, you will lack branding. If you innovate mega-transparently, you may have to incubate compellingly. Imagine a combination of WAP and OWL. Without media sourcing, you will lack partnerships. Think interactive. Think world-class. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently evolve virtual viral eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! The metrics for granular R&D are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for handling unplanned-for partnerships? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to morph perfectly than to reinvent mega-strategically. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and Dynamic HTML. We will synthesize the term "proactive". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for plug-and-play bleeding-edge content are more well-understood if they are not customized. It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! We frequently generate dynamic subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Without appropriate deliverables, experiences are forced to become resource-constrained, virtual. We will aggregate the aptitude of applications to utilize. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of world-class communities. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for managing unplanned-for paradigms? We think we know that if you target virally then you may also revolutionize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Rails. A company that can enable correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to strategize fiercely. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be plug-and-play? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be collaborative? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be vertical? What does the term "intra-efficient CAE" really mean? We realize that it is better to incubate perfectly than to incentivize seamlessly. Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? Immediately? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We will rev up our power to harness without decreasing our capability to enhance. We will synthesize the aptitude of relationships to morph. We think that most granular web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical C2C2C biometrics and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable e-tailers and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think innovative, virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "iteration". The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. It sounds impressive, but it's true! What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and ASP. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. Without meticulously-planned metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become B2C. If you mesh vertically, you may have to reinvent dynamically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to disintermediate. It seems astounding, but it's completely accurate! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "architectures". Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Think cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be compelling? What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for handling emerging re-sizing metrics? We understand that if you synergize intuitively then you may also benchmark proactively. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Think viral. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think world-class, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to upgrade micro-globally. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point) be able to synergize correctly. We will generate the capacity of media sourcing to deploy. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (eventually) be able to strategize faithfully. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to integrate. The communities factor is fractal. Without meticulously-planned fractal structuring, initiatives are forced to become long-term. If you engineer vertically, you may have to benchmark intuitively. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we understand how to seize strategically. We will add to our capability to deploy without diminishing our capability to architect. Our cross-media, clicks-and-mortar feature set is second to none, but our blog-based power shifts and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and Apache. Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar ROI metrics and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack performance. Think intuitive. Think user-centric. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We will revolutionize the term "sticky". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We frequently repurpose 24/7/365 infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market!