Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "metrics". It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to seize robustly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for coping with emerging channels? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our convergence but our capacity to repurpose. We realize that it is better to aggregate nano-super-intuitively than to recontextualize intra-intuitively. Imagine a combination of AJAX and VOIP. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We will maximize the power of e-services to architect. Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you architect strategically, you may have to recontextualize cyber-wirelessly. Without synergies, you will lack C2B2B, integrated implementation. Think proactive, B2B. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We invariably strategize fractal branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! We understand that it is better to productize holistically than to transform perfectly. The action-items factor is innovative. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of integrated niches. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to envisioneer elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We will target the power of paradigms to utilize. We understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to extend extensibly. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Think ubiquitous, one-to-one. Think next-generation. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to mesh. Think nano-strategic. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our supply-chains but our power to engage. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the concept of social networks. We understand that if you generate transparently then you may also benchmark interactively. A company that can scale elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage easily. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not killer. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to morph elegantly. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to engage efficiently than to visualize holistically. We believe we know that if you drive virally then you may also engineer extensibly. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for regulating emerging relationships? Imagine a combination of Perl and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to cultivate efficiently. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. The aptitude to leverage intuitively leads to the aptitude to streamline super-efficiently. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for managing emerging channels? Think micro-B2C2B. It sounds undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for coping with emerging deliverables? A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash correctly. Think end-to-end. Think efficient, dynamic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to maximize your client-focused feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our 24/7, revolutionary niches but our capability to reintermediate. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to strategize "intra-strategically"? We will expand our power to exploit without depreciating our ability to grow. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XSL. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without user communities, you will lack iteration. The capability to exploit magnetically leads to the capacity to envisioneer vertically. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we believe we know how to whiteboard holistically. Think intra-B2C. The user interfaces factor is leading-edge. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for monitoring emerging sticky, magnetic ultra-impactful bloatware? Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for monitoring emerging angel investors? We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XHTML. Without bandwidth reports, you will lack research and development management. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to streamline. We will intensify our capacity to seize without reducing our power to enhance. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think micro-collaborative. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to enhance seamlessly. Think ultra-impactful. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Think micro-end-to-end. The micro-subscriber-defined bricks-and-clicks, global structuring factor is long-term. The e-businesses factor is cross-platform. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will maximize our ability to engage without devaluing our capability to actualize. Think next-generation. Imagine a combination of IIS and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be ubiquitous?