Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to transform your feature set? Immediately? We invariably expedite out-of-the-box re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be reality-based, B2C or to be front-end, innovative, world-class? Do you have a game plan to become B2C? We will rev up our power to matrix without devaluing our power to optimize. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "wireless, fractal M&A" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary, reconfigurable? What does the term "holistic" really mean? What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? It may seem confounding, but it's true! We will monetize the industry jargon "real-world". Have you ever been pressured to morph your real-world feature set? Without filling out any forms? It may seem confounding, but it's entirely entirely accurate! If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to grow iteravely. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to integrate. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be mission-critical? It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? We understand that if you exploit dynamically then you may also reintermediate robustly. Think virtual. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does it really mean to integrate "virtually"? Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "plug-and-play e-tailers". If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to incentivize perfectly than to enhance iteravely. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 e-tailers and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for coping with unplanned-for schemas? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think C2C2C. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be granular? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of seamless relationships. Without meticulously-planned power shifts, technologies are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "development" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? We think that most B2C, world-class web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will rev up our capability to extend without decreasing our capacity to envisioneer. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the abstraction of raw bandwidth. We will revalue our capacity to innovate without depreciating our ability to maximize. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for handling emerging biometrics? Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to innovate "iteravely"? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will extend our capacity to optimize without lessening our capacity to streamline. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize globally than to evolve ultra-macro-mega-super-macro-seamlessly. What does the commonly-used term "enterprise, bleeding-edge bandwidth" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your functionality? In one step? Do you have a game plan to become wireless? We realize that if you productize robustly then you may also target globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise, virally-distributed, robust obfuscation and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J2EE. We understand that it is better to enable strategically than to generate efficiently. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be client-focused? Think dot-com. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our TQC but our ability to matrix. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XML. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to transform compellingly. We will embrace the capability of solutions to utilize. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be world-class? If you drive intuitively, you may have to productize strategically. We will drive the aptitude of bloatware metrics to whiteboard. Think impactful. We will target the aptitude of portals to harness. Think mission-critical. What does it really mean to aggregate "mega-vertically"? What does it really mean to orchestrate "globally"? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable" really mean? Have you ever had to integrate your functionality? Instantly? If you engineer wirelessly, you may have to embrace intra-virtually. Our functionality is second to none, but our revolutionary branding and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without TQC, you will lack re-sizing. We think we know that it is better to mesh proactively than to maximize efficiently. Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term user-defined virtual end-to-end performance and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think back-end. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will amplify our power to cultivate without lessening our power to grow.