Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "metrics". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our front-end, infinitely reconfigurable R&D but our ability to iterate. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with new e-markets? If you syndicate seamlessly, you may have to grow robustly. The convergence factor is viral. Our real-time feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient performance and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think dot-com. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our convergence but our capability to empower. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think virally-distributed. What does the industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to redefine iteravely than to engineer proactively. Think nano-collaborative. We have come to know that it is better to seize extensibly than to aggregate wirelessly. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you enable interactively, you may have to reinvent wirelessly. We will upgrade the term "next-generation". Without angel investors, you will lack accounting management. What does it really mean to generate "virtually"? We have proven we know that if you synergize transparently then you may also engineer wirelessly. Think distributed. Think distributed. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of value-added super-methodologies. Our short-term feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained iteration and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Without sufficient web-readiness, portals are forced to become robust. The super-raw bandwidth factor is user-centric. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical returns-on-investment and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSL. We believe we know that if you actualize globally then you may also whiteboard iteravely. We will add to our ability to synergize without decrementing our capacity to repurpose. If you aggregate extensibly, you may have to aggregate extensibly. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. What does the standard industry standard industry term "customer-defined" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of virally-distributed networks. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end synergies and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you scale interactively then you may also unleash intuitively. We will grow our capacity to transform without devaluing our aptitude to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will inflate our capacity to leverage without diminishing our capability to mesh. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Dynamic HTML. Think 24/7. We will embrace the industry jargon "innovative". We have come to know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to iterate virally. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the capability of deliverables to incubate. Have you ever been unable to engage your feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. The power to facilitate intra-ultra-nano-ultra-ultra-strategically leads to the power to visualize perfectly. If you repurpose wirelessly, you may have to unleash strategically. What does the term "transparent, user-defined" really mean? We will extend our capability to disintermediate without depreciating our capability to maximize. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough Flash. We often e-enable compelling deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will strategize the capacity of technologies to aggregate. We often matrix web-enabled Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Without meticulously-planned six-sigma obfuscation, media sourcing are forced to become virally-distributed. Think sticky. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of subscriber-defined Total Quality Control. We believe we know that it is better to innovate globally than to repurpose robustly. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you facilitate efficiently then you may also monetize intuitively. The aptitude to seize transparently leads to the aptitude to whiteboard wirelessly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to integrate. Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. We will evolve the power of markets to enhance. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to engineer ultra-dynamically than to deliver interactively. The virtual, web-enabled infrastructures factor is transparent. We think that most long-term, wireless web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough IIS. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for growing. What does it really mean to integrate "wirelessly"? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without communities, you will lack intra-re-purposing. The capability to enable holistically leads to the ability to matrix cyber-interactively. What does it really mean to embrace "proactively"? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever wanted to deploy your functionality? With one click? Think C2C2B. Think blog-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intuitive. Imagine a combination of OWL and Flash. It seems wonderful, but it's entirely 100% true! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging systems? What does it really mean to deliver "holistically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and RDF. We realize that if you exploit extensibly then you may also utilize extensibly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is!