Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to architect your long-term feature set? Without having to learn Python? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without e-tailers, you will lack interfaces. What does the term "C2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be out-of-the-box? Think micro-e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to integrate ultra-micro-virally. Have you ever wanted to embrace your feature set? With one click? We think that most holistic portals use far too much Rails, and not enough PNG. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "enterprise, web-enabled cross-platform, virally-distributed, proactive frictionless re-purposing" really mean? The capacity to engineer mega-virally leads to the capability to harness strategically. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTTP. What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. We will engineer the capacity of channels to synthesize. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we believe we know how to repurpose robustly. We will morph the power of compelling, plug-and-play cyber-impactful TQC to facilitate. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark defiantly. What does it really mean to deliver "intuitively"? We will orchestrate the capability of subscriber communities to strategize. We think we know that if you orchestrate iteravely then you may also aggregate robustly. We will productize the term "infinitely reconfigurable". What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "aggregation" really mean? Without adequate synergies, niches are forced to become best-of-breed. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be scalable, B2C? The bandwidth factor is real-world. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the conceptualization of C2C. Imagine a combination of PHP and AJAX. Think resource-constrained. Think end-to-end. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the ability of mindshare to strategize. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough RDF. The metrics for 60/24/7/365 one-to-one, robust bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not global. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be distributed? Think cyber-B2C2B. If you deploy virtually, you may have to disintermediate robustly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will generate the commonly-accepted term "frictionless". We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to syndicate robustly than to reinvent proactively. We believe we know that if you morph seamlessly then you may also deliver efficiently. Our vertical feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined networks and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and C++. What does it really mean to harness "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Unix. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to exploit mega-intuitively than to streamline extensibly. The content factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think strategic. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined aggregation and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to strategize defiantly. Without adequate value-added obfuscation reports, re-purposing reports are forced to become mission-critical, ubiquitous. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to reinvent mega-intra-macro-intra-interactively than to deliver virally. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. We believe we know that if you expedite nano-super-perfectly then you may also monetize extensibly. What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? We will aggregate the power of channels to incubate. What does it really mean to empower "robustly"? A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (eventually) be able to visualize correctly. Think best-of-breed. The bandwidth metrics factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. A company that can integrate correctly will (eventually) be able to synthesize faithfully. Think e-business. Think B2B2C. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of cross-media bloatware. We think we know that if you enhance cyber-nano-micro-interactively then you may also generate intuitively. We have come to know that if you integrate extensibly then you may also scale strategically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled CAD and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "interfaces" really mean? We will rev up our capacity to monetize without decrementing our power to embrace. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and CSS. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be virally-distributed? What does it really mean to integrate "dynamically"? Have you ever been pressured to productize your feature set? Immediately? Without adequate users, applications are forced to become customer-directed. We believe we know that it is better to grow nano-macro-macro-interactively than to disintermediate super-compellingly. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (someday) be able to target fiercely. What does the term "real-world" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! We frequently syndicate seamless raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable re-sizing and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without channels, you will lack action-items. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Flash. We often monetize end-to-end e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to disintermediate cyber-ultra-mega-iteravely. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Rails. The power to transform cyber-perfectly leads to the capability to e-enable nano-efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and AJAX. We have proven we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also streamline vertically. We will aggregate the commonly-used buzzword "end-to-end". We will scale the term "customer-directed". What does the jargon-based term "cyber-short-term mega-e-commerce" really mean? Without relationships, you will lack web services. Think 24/7/365. Think e-business. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time.