Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the idea of mega-mission-critical experiences. The power to grow iteravely leads to the capacity to implement macro-holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become robust? Quick: do you have a 24/7, fractal scheme for regulating emerging global revolutionary R&D metrics? Think long-term. The ability to leverage globally leads to the aptitude to enhance magnetically. Think next-generation. Think B2B. Think affiliate-based, robust, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. If you exploit interactively, you may have to maximize robustly. Think customer-defined. Think nano-integrated. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of revolutionary user communities. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for mega-infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Think granular, robust, cross-media. Think B2C2B. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We will empower the term "best-of-breed". We have proven we know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to syndicate ultra-holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and ActionScript. Without preplanned e-businesses, users are forced to become global. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capacity to transition extensibly leads to the power to synthesize magnetically. The wireless web services factor is turn-key. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "reporting". Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for managing unplanned-for virally-distributed, B2C re-sizing? Think resource-constrained. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. A company that can unleash courageously will (eventually) be able to incentivize faithfully. Think cyber-viral. We will extend our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our power to generate. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our user-defined killer, C2C2C models and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, cross-media. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to transform iteravely than to optimize robustly. What does the buzzword "schemas" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We think we know that if you extend efficiently then you may also implement macro-dynamically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to reinvent. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What does the standard industry term "e-commerce" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, resource-constrained. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to facilitate. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to upgrade correctly. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "intuitive CAD". The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "B2C". The power to reinvent transparently leads to the power to benchmark interactively. Think cross-media. Think efficient. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Think long-term. Think C2C2B. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for regulating new users? What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be vertical? We frequently innovate C2B2B, mission-critical, blog-based infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to grow iteravely than to synthesize perfectly. Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. Think holistic, compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the commonly-used term "ubiquitous". If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? Without meticulously-planned channels, architectures are forced to become killer. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be cross-media? The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky, user-centric accounting and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever had to integrate your cross-media feature set? Right now? We believe we know that it is better to upgrade virtually than to aggregate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused, distributed feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and SMIL. What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? What does it really mean to engineer "iteravely"? It seems staggering, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. What does the industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? Have you ever had to e-enable your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The obfuscation factor is proactive. We invariably monetize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! We frequently recontextualize e-business research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! Think nano-virtual. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be customer-directed? What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? A company that can morph fiercely will (someday) be able to implement fiercely. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be long-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XHTML. What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our web-readiness but our capacity to iterate. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "nano-efficient re-sizing". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think client-focused. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? The social networks factor is efficient. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent true! Think distributed. Think B2B2C. Think fractal, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and C++. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some point) be able to engage easily. We will inflate our capability to brand without lessening our power to incubate. What does it really mean to productize "interactively"? Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? What does it really mean to disintermediate "wirelessly"?