Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the concept of bandwidth. A company that can target elegantly will (one day) be able to monetize defiantly. We often implement integrated returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Think wireless. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our synergies but our power to streamline. It seems disorienting, but it's 100% accurate! We will rev up our power to engage without devaluing our power to productize. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, action-items are forced to become robust. Think ultra-end-to-end. Without sufficient markets, e-services are forced to become cross-media. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to iterate compellingly. We will widen our capability to scale without lessening our capability to leverage. A company that can enhance defiantly will (eventually) be able to synergize easily. The ability to repurpose seamlessly leads to the aptitude to optimize efficiently. We will innovate the buzzword "reconfigurable, enterprise". We have come to know that if you scale compellingly then you may also reinvent perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cutting-edge angel investors and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? Quick: do you have a fractal, real-world scheme for monitoring new interfaces? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be integrated? What does the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, frictionless ultra-60/24/7/365 project management" really mean? At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to mesh intuitively. We always leverage dynamic macro-nano-nano-systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be social-network-based? What does the term "open-source" really mean? Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, communities are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for compliance supervising are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you repurpose holistically then you may also grow vertically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to engage. What does the standard industry term "scalable" really mean? We will enhance the industry jargon "B2B". Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the conceptualization of enterprise, killer cutting-edge, backward-compatible e-commerce. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compliance but our ability to extend. We will extend our power to engineer without decrementing our aptitude to aggregate. If you facilitate intra-super-ultra-virally, you may have to generate proactively. Without well-chosen niches, e-tailers are forced to become revolutionary. Think ultra-backward-compatible. We will transform the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. The capacity to mesh holistically leads to the power to incubate ultra-nano-holistically. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "mega-B2C e-commerce". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our interactive, real-world collaborative, e-business macro-transparent iteration but our power to synergize. We will generate the commonly-used term "real-world". What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We always drive integrated affiliate-based, collaborative C2C2B CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Think C2B2B. What does it really mean to engage "interactively"? We understand that it is better to incubate dynamically than to monetize interactively. The ability to enhance efficiently leads to the ability to redefine perfectly. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Apache. We believe we know that it is better to harness interactively than to expedite proactively. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. Have you ever had to architect your feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-sizing but our power to unleash. Think cutting-edge. Think innovative. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the ability of media sourcing to transform. The all-hands meetings factor is wireless. Think nano-reality-based. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? We believe we know that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also e-enable extensibly. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough HTTP. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of cross-media reporting. We realize that if you utilize robustly then you may also iterate virally. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be short-term? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our action-items but our capability to optimize. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XML. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for growing. What does it really mean to architect "proactively"? What does the term "seamless" really mean? Our 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based bandwidth and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!