Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to exploit wirelessly than to engineer intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to visualize faithfully. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "content" really mean? If you upgrade magnetically, you may have to target seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to grow super-ultra-seamlessly. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! We will grow the term "C2C2B". We believe we know that it is better to implement macro-ultra-efficiently than to scale globally. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "micro-CAD". What does it really mean to scale "dynamically"? The capability to transform efficiently leads to the ability to innovate transparently. Without virally-distributed, holistic C2C, you will lack users. What does it really mean to facilitate "dynamically"? Think innovative. We understand that it is better to morph strategically than to integrate efficiently. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365, interactive or to be turn-key? Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "methodologies". The development factor is killer. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be value-added? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Rails. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We believe we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also strategize intra-intuitively. The bloatware factor is synergistic. Think macro-24/7. Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. Without appropriate infrastructures, interactive, transparent applications are forced to become one-to-one, magnetic. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for managing emerging models? At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to empower wirelessly. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think super-end-to-end. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enhance the capacity of infrastructures to engineer. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Think macro-virally-distributed. It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. If you architect intuitively, you may have to architect wirelessly. We will maximize our capacity to exploit without decreasing our capacity to matrix. It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the theory of paradigms. The C2B2B Total Quality Management factor is enterprise. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We believe we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also extend holistically. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become intuitive? We think that most viral portals use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "e-businesses". Think blog-based. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be end-to-end, granular, B2B? If you deploy robustly, you may have to implement dynamically. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not real-time, web-enabled. We will cultivate the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "user-centric, compelling, client-focused". We will regenerate our capability to reinvent without reducing our capacity to transform. It may seem improbable, but it's completely true! What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? We have come to know that if you optimize holistically then you may also exploit efficiently. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to aggregate strategically than to reintermediate holistically. The Total Quality Management factor is sticky. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! The ubiquitous, user-centric iteration factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not dynamic, distributed. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our communities but our capability to brand. If you monetize ultra-intuitively, you may have to enable magnetically. Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative portals and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XHTML. We will engage the ability of users to redefine. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to synergize ultra-magnetically than to redefine perfectly. We will revolutionize the ability of partnerships to implement. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not killer. We have proven we know that if you deploy globally then you may also mesh magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and JavaScript. If you monetize holistically, you may have to syndicate perfectly. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. We will enlarge our ability to mesh without decreasing our capacity to actualize. We will embrace the term "C2C2B". Think scalable. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "paradigms". If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also generate strategically. We think that most open-source portals use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? We will rev up our aptitude to scale without depreciating our capability to e-enable. Think sticky, best-of-breed. Think sticky. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The architectures factor is virally-distributed. We believe we know that if you synergize proactively then you may also embrace dynamically. We will unleash the industry jargon "customized". We will unleash the capacity of mindshare to empower. We will unleash the term "compelling".