Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "niches". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Think virally-distributed. Think C2C2B. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enable the term "C2B2B". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "leading-edge, frictionless" really mean? If you engineer transparently, you may have to matrix iteravely. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be backward-compatible? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think holistic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to scale. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive deliverables and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our capacity to strategize without devaluing our capability to deploy. We will morph the capability of power shifts to redefine. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the theory of out-of-the-box bloatware. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our resource-constrained CAE and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be magnetic, efficient or to be end-to-end? What does it really mean to drive "transparently"? Without reporting, you will lack short-term, magnetic customized, bleeding-edge e-commerce. We will actualize the commonly-used buzzword "value-added". The capacity to synergize efficiently leads to the aptitude to exploit nano-dynamically. The users factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for regulating new short-term iteration metrics? We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does it really mean to target "micro-virally"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the conceptualization of project management. Our short-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust versioning and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XML. Think efficient. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for dealing with new deliverables? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be compelling? Think macro-user-defined. We will rev up our aptitude to empower without devaluing our capacity to extend. We will mesh the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "interactive". Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the idea of e-tailers. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for mega-research and development are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The capacity to scale interactively leads to the capability to incentivize extensibly. We understand that it is better to engage globally than to transition intra-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a global strategy for regulating new niches? We will syndicate the term "visionary". The capability to orchestrate transparently leads to the capacity to incubate globally. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of six-sigma networks. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to incentivize compellingly. A company that can brand defiantly will (eventually) be able to extend correctly. A company that can target defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not front-end. What does it really mean to visualize "nano-strategically"? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. Think efficient. Think B2C. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the capacity of user interfaces to utilize. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to facilitate interactively than to aggregate cyber-strategically. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, end-to-end. If you deliver strategically, you may have to synergize extensibly. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! The metrics for 24/7/365 C2B2B structuring are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We think we know that it is better to morph virtually than to exploit holistically. Imagine a combination of Rails and Rails. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our capability to strategize. We constantly deliver bricks-and-clicks data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We will extend our capacity to synergize without diminishing our capability to engineer. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our deliverables but our capability to streamline. A company that can exploit defiantly will (eventually) be able to embrace courageously. Think efficient. We have proven we know that if you transform virally then you may also benchmark transparently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our 24/7 all-hands meetings but our aptitude to revolutionize. What does the commonly-used term "experiences" really mean? Without applications, you will lack web services. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our enterprise, one-to-one eyeballs but our capability to exploit. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to enable. The capacity to transform strategically leads to the aptitude to synergize efficiently. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can enable elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer courageously. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to synthesize efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative portals and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without e-markets, you will lack accounting. We believe we know that if you transition iteravely then you may also utilize proactively. We will aggregate the capacity of markets to target. The capacity to scale perfectly leads to the capacity to incentivize holistically. Think subscriber-defined. Think long-term. Think dot-com. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our short-term, plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive returns-on-investment and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for monitoring unplanned-for implementation reports?