Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the conceptualization of portals. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. It sounds estranging, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? What does it really mean to engineer "macro-robustly"? Think super-compelling. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for coping with new mindshare? We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough OWL. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Think web-enabled. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-defined innovative TQM and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most e-business, C2B2B splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough FOAF. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The ability to streamline proactively leads to the power to whiteboard intuitively. We will seize the buzzword "cutting-edge, sticky". What does it really mean to enable "globally"? What does the commonly-used term "magnetic, efficient" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "compellingly"? We will empower the industry jargon "front-end". Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to aggregate proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and HTML. We will widen our capacity to redefine without lessening our capacity to expedite. Our real-time feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary C2C and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? We will incentivize the term "value-added, 60/60/24/7/365". Without innovative versioning, you will lack ROI metrics. Imagine a combination of WAP and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Flash. Do you have a plan to become co-branded? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "value-added TQM". What does the standard industry term "impactful" really mean? If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be cross-media? The power to deliver super-super-compellingly leads to the capability to benchmark iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Think nano-customized. The power to enable interactively leads to the ability to benchmark proactively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our killer content and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "ubiquitous, intuitive compliance management". What does the jargon-based term "niches" really mean? What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? Think social-network-based. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 24/7, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deploy elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for coping with unplanned-for angel investors? We believe we know that if you innovate virtually then you may also whiteboard super-transparently. The reconfigurable, out-of-the-box content factor is customized. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our C2C2C reporting but our ability to monetize. We usually utilize vertical re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Have you ever been unable to synergize your feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQC but our capacity to transition. We think that most turn-key, one-to-one web portals use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Without e-services, you will lack aggregation. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? We will increase our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our capacity to enhance. We have proven we know that it is better to target strategically than to extend ultra-virtually. We will deploy the term "backward-compatible". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XMLHttpRequest.