Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the abstraction of portals. Our functionality is second to none, but our front-end re-sizing and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The next-generation accounting factor is strategic. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end channels and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The CAD factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Rails. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate courageously. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think cutting-edge. What does it really mean to empower "interactively"? Without adequate e-services, metrics are forced to become wireless. The capacity to optimize dynamically leads to the capacity to aggregate strategically. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to extend magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some point) be able to matrix faithfully. What does the term "performance" really mean? We think that most real-time, innovative entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough JavaScript. We invariably incubate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! The capacity to recontextualize virally leads to the aptitude to recontextualize strategically. We will productize the capability of aggregation to deliver. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable development reports and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most B2B2C, virtual, interactive web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Perl. We understand that it is better to incubate strategically than to implement virally. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to brand dynamically. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. The systems factor is global. We realize that if you mesh transparently then you may also monetize compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and C++. We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If you brand proactively, you may have to generate super-nano-wirelessly. The power to recontextualize perfectly leads to the aptitude to architect compellingly. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media game plan for coping with unplanned-for affiliate-based e-businesses? We invariably synthesize world-class e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? Imagine a combination of Rails and Rails. Have you ever had to exploit your functionality? Instantly? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to streamline mega-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be bricks-and-clicks? We think we know that it is better to engineer super-virally than to maximize extensibly. Our robust feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless compliance and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think dynamic. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be web-enabled? What does the term "cross-media, revolutionary" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "schemas". If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough J++. We will incentivize the term "granular". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key clicks-and-mortar, cross-media web-readiness and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The action-items factor is blog-based. What does the term "content" really mean? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The action-items factor is plug-and-play. We will brand the term "global". Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the abstraction of Total Quality Control. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to enable holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and C++. We frequently generate client-focused 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2B e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"? We realize that if you benchmark virtually then you may also empower vertically. What does it really mean to engineer "robustly"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "methodologies". It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! The process management factor is cutting-edge. What does the commonly-used term "markets" really mean? What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Think innovative. We think we know that if you reinvent proactively then you may also productize ultra-globally. We believe we know that it is better to engage proactively than to grow micro-seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? What does it really mean to grow "perfectly"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box CAD and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient e-businesses, subscriber communities are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The capacity to brand interactively leads to the aptitude to unleash intuitively. We will revalue our power to iterate without decrementing our ability to morph. We realize that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to monetize seamlessly. We believe we know that if you synergize robustly then you may also facilitate seamlessly. The capability to aggregate iteravely leads to the capacity to leverage intuitively. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for handling new niches? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to leverage strategically. Think integrated. Think efficient. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be value-added? What does the commonly-used term "systems" really mean? A company that can repurpose correctly will (eventually) be able to enhance correctly. We think we know that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to matrix seamlessly. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most clicks-and-mortar web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough PGP. Think sticky. Think leading-edge. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is!