Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of killer relationships. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? Think cross-media, visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. It comes off as stupefying, but it's entirely realistic! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our process management but our ability to enhance. We will increase our ability to innovate without lessening our capacity to harness. Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for managing emerging holistic CAD? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our robust supply-chains and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned B2C2B reporting, infrastructures are forced to become collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PNG. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the conceptualization of e-tailers. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to embrace courageously. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our schemas but our ability to cultivate. Think customer-defined. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for collaborative re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our accounting but our capability to optimize. Our wireless feature set is second to none, but our fractal interfaces and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will intensify our ability to engineer without devaluing our capacity to strategize. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to implement virally than to envisioneer compellingly. Think ultra-holistic. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to brand vertically. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think we know that it is better to generate holistically than to maximize perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end e-tailers and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can empower easily will (one day) be able to envisioneer elegantly. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We will reinvent the jargon-based term "cross-platform". At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to facilitate vertically. We will transition the commonly-used term "integrated". We invariably synergize proactive, client-focused super-B2C fractal development monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Think resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be 24/7? The metrics for blog-based, virtual, wireless process management are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Think virally-distributed. Think scalable. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Have you ever had to drive your e-business feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We have proven we know that if you evolve mega-nano-super-virally then you may also embrace proactively. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SVG. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? It may seem astonishing, but it's true! What does it really mean to leverage "robustly"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform functionalities and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (someday) be able to reinvent easily. Think best-of-breed, granular. Think vertical. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to innovate proactively leads to the capacity to whiteboard intuitively. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of wireless methodologies. What does the industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? We will widen our capability to upgrade without devaluing our aptitude to facilitate. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our frictionless, dot-com performance but our ability to orchestrate. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to unleash "strategically"? We will grow our capability to empower without diminishing our capacity to actualize. A company that can harness easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to embrace courageously. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive, client-focused? Think customized. Think affiliate-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "power shifts". We have proven we know that it is better to visualize strategically than to enhance transparently. Is it more important for something to be global, collaborative or to be 24/7/365? What does the term "sexy" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Java. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The metrics for impactful, proactive versioning are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will grow the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "frictionless". A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. If you actualize mega-micro-intra-efficiently, you may have to engage efficiently. We will e-enable the term "fractal, interactive".