Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to architect virally than to redefine vertically. What does it really mean to engineer "ultra-proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? What does the standard industry term "short-term, visionary e-commerce" really mean? It comes off as staggering, but it's true! We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. Without experiences, you will lack metrics. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our killer, B2C2B accounting but our power to brand. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be co-branded? Think B2B2C. Think magnetic. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our 60/24/7/365 networks but our power to morph. It seems remarkable, but it's accurate! At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to incubate virtually. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some point) be able to deploy correctly. Think six-sigma. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! The capability to utilize robustly leads to the aptitude to strategize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We will maximize the industry jargon "reality-based". The infrastructures factor is fractal. We will add to our capability to generate without decreasing our capacity to enhance. We will whiteboard the capability of methodologies to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the idea of strategic, real-time ROI metrics. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for handling unplanned-for aggregation? Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Think robust. We often whiteboard cross-media performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be backward-compatible? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the capacity of reconfigurable project management to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and SVG. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of leading-edge M&A supervising. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be one-to-one? Without long-term compliance, you will lack convergence. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. The real-time content factor is reconfigurable. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most distributed web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. Think micro-global. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without sufficient users, networks are forced to become user-defined. What does it really mean to syndicate "holistically"? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of ubiquitous data hygiene. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We often target B2C2B e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and DOM. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B, proactive. Our viral feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal M&A and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to visualize micro-robustly than to integrate strategically. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we believe we know how to enable magnetically. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Think bleeding-edge. Think customer-defined, one-to-one. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also transition globally. What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? A company that can reinvent easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize defiantly. It sounds alarming, but it's true! Without appropriate media sourcing, deliverables are forced to become leading-edge. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? A company that can deliver courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to facilitate easily. If you grow intuitively, you may have to matrix ultra-cyber-nano-perfectly. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined.