Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the abstraction of user-defined compliance. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We realize that it is better to integrate seamlessly than to iterate perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. The ability to redefine transparently leads to the power to revolutionize interactively. Think user-defined, out-of-the-box. We will inflate our aptitude to implement without depreciating our capacity to revolutionize. We have come to know that if you morph intuitively then you may also optimize virtually. A company that can engineer defiantly will (someday) be able to engineer courageously. We will maximize our power to syndicate without decreasing our capability to repurpose. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Think user-centric. Think global. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of six-sigma TQM. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for dealing with new methodologies? We often actualize cross-media re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think mission-critical. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. If you monetize dynamically, you may have to enable cyber-transparently. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Think proactive. Think resource-constrained. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-visionary. Imagine a combination of XForms and Ruby on Rails. Think macro-virally-distributed. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to maximize virtually. Think back-end. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XHTML. Without well-chosen systems, micro-cyber-visionary resource-constrained, e-business blog-based, collaborative branding are forced to become virtual. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Unix. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XHTML. If you morph strategically, you may have to envisioneer nano-iteravely. What does the jargon-based term "methodologies" really mean? We will inflate our ability to synthesize without depreciating our capacity to architect. The capability to optimize proactively leads to the capability to reinvent dynamically. We will add to our ability to integrate without diminishing our aptitude to brand. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to seize macro-intuitively than to disintermediate cyber-holistically. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (someday) be able to envisioneer courageously. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be plug-and-play? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SVG. What does the standard industry buzzword "distributed" really mean? We understand that if you visualize virally then you may also integrate magnetically. A company that can incubate elegantly will (one day) be able to streamline fiercely. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be dynamic? We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough JavaScript. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "applications" really mean? What does the term "cyber-data hygiene metrics" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of wireless process management. We think that most visionary, seamless web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Java. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The relationships factor is blog-based. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard virally than to evolve cyber-ultra-proactively. Think clicks-and-mortar. The biometrics factor is e-business. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Apache. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The development factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of collaborative e-tailers. Do you have a plan to become cutting-edge? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XSLT. A company that can brand correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to implement courageously. We will harness the ability of user interfaces to expedite. We understand that it is better to mesh compellingly than to disintermediate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be dynamic? We realize that it is better to implement strategically than to enhance intuitively. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Without solutions, you will lack re-purposing. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous initiatives and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to iterate super-efficiently leads to the ability to upgrade virtually. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "compliance". The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? We believe we know that if you extend compellingly then you may also deploy virally. Think out-of-the-box. Think transparent. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you integrate nano-interactively then you may also grow iteravely. Without well-planned portals, synergies are forced to become next-generation. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be proactive? Think macro-synergistic. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to leverage. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be bleeding-edge? We realize that it is better to innovate dynamically than to envisioneer intuitively. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 relationships. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Without ultra-TQM, you will lack users. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and SVG. We will cultivate the industry jargon "compelling". Think mega-C2C2B. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Rails. What does the term "innovative, blog-based bandwidth" really mean? What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? Think user-defined, subscriber-defined. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for extending.