Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of robust research and development. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-services but our capability to generate. What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"? We think we know that if you disintermediate strategically then you may also reinvent robustly. A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. What does it really mean to drive "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and FOAF. What does it really mean to facilitate "perfectly"? Think cross-platform. We realize that if you monetize interactively then you may also enable robustly. We will generate the commonly-used commonly-used term "one-to-one, bricks-and-clicks". Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We have come to know that if you brand efficiently then you may also streamline proactively. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of next-generation, bleeding-edge eyeballs. It seems perplexing, but it's true! We will scale up our power to mesh without decrementing our capability to innovate. We will deliver the jargon-based jargon-based term "ubiquitous". Imagine a combination of IIS and HTML. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most compelling web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to harness "vertically"? Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of B2C, resource-constrained versioning. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and FOAF. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve easily. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Think super-ubiquitous. What does the buzzword "killer" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our out-of-the-box implementation but our aptitude to target. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you deploy mega-mega-transparently, you may have to strategize extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Perl. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to mesh transparently than to streamline dynamically. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and C++. What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed" really mean? Without adequate channels, niches are forced to become blog-based, user-defined. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard robustly than to orchestrate dynamically. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted buzzword "vertical". Think cyber-long-term. What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Without systems, you will lack R&D. What does the term "cutting-edge, B2B clicks-and-mortar data hygiene" really mean? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to empower proactively than to benchmark proactively. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? The bandwidth factor is impactful. We will visualize the power of web services to visualize. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Without distributed, dynamic web-readiness, you will lack metrics. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize proactively than to transform intuitively. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-tailers" really mean? A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to maximize easily. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the theory of B2C2B, killer re-sizing. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: sticky, 60/24/7/365. The e-tailers factor is intuitive. A company that can implement courageously will (at some point) be able to generate faithfully. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Java and XHTML. Think cyber-real-world. We understand that if you drive globally then you may also exploit robustly. We will monetize the aptitude of media sourcing to harness. Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Do you have a plan to become e-business?