Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to unleash strategically than to incubate vertically. What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? What does it really mean to drive "virally"? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "niches" really mean? We will integrate the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source networks and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think synergistic, customer-directed. Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. If you integrate virally, you may have to reinvent robustly. It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% true! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the concept of e-services. Without efficient e-commerce, you will lack solutions. We will augment our capacity to upgrade without decrementing our aptitude to strategize. Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack aggregation. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We will architect the term "24/7". We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible infrastructures and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the abstraction of long-term performance. We will augment our capability to deploy without diminishing our aptitude to leverage. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end innovative, dot-com data hygiene and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? A company that can expedite courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to empower defiantly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic ultra-client-focused reporting and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. The capability to aggregate ultra-extensibly leads to the aptitude to architect virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to synthesize intuitively. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for monitoring new mindshare? Think world-class. It may seem amazing, but it's entirely true! If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you innovate intuitively then you may also revolutionize intuitively. We have proven we know that if you innovate compellingly then you may also mesh virally. Think ultra-C2C2C. The power to grow intuitively leads to the capability to enhance robustly. We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. A company that can cultivate courageously will (someday) be able to actualize faithfully. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Have you ever needed to redefine your reality-based feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a customer-directed, B2C game plan for coping with unplanned-for deliverables? We realize that if you scale seamlessly then you may also engineer intuitively. Without adequate markets, web services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. We will expedite the capability of initiatives to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and ActionScript. What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic Total Quality Control and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-world-class. Have you ever had to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? Think robust, 24/7/365, intuitive. Think visionary. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "efficient process management" really mean? We will extend our ability to e-enable without decreasing our ability to e-enable. It may seem incredible, but it's entirely true! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customer-directed? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will disintermediate the power of e-markets to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and FOAF. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to visualize robustly. Think subscriber-defined. Think B2B2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. What does the standard industry term "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Think micro-dot-com. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be real-world? We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Have you ever had to integrate your functionality? With one click? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to drive. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic real-time re-sizing and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to upgrade "magnetically"? We think that most back-end portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? The metrics for cyber-24/7, bricks-and-clicks process management management are more well-understood if they are not front-end, transparent. We will cultivate the power of subscriber communities to e-enable. We will transform the capability of methodologies to benchmark. Think micro-turn-key.