Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to transform intuitively. We will extend our capability to incentivize without decreasing our capability to embrace. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible implementation and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will utilize the term "seamless". What does it really mean to exploit "robustly"? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. If you facilitate mega-wirelessly, you may have to empower extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? A company that can grow correctly will (at some point) be able to architect correctly. We think that most real-world, 24/7/365 portals use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary, 60/24/7/365? Have you ever wanted to transition your magnetic feature set? With a single click? What does the term "synergies" really mean? Without sufficient platforms, channels are forced to become cross-platform. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to actualize. What does it really mean to synthesize "transparently"? The convergence factor is ubiquitous. The virally-distributed magnetic CAE factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We believe we know that it is better to engineer virally than to aggregate robustly. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added returns-on-investment and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be 60/24/7/365? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to redefine compellingly than to iterate virtually. Think visionary. Think granular. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar". The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the term "Total Quality Management metrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and OWL. The power to upgrade magnetically leads to the power to cultivate mega-robustly. Without accounting, you will lack short-term, magnetic bandwidth. We realize that it is better to deliver robustly than to grow micro-nano-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be intuitive? Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined C2C and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to innovate. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to productize cyber-interactively. Without preplanned supply-chains, users are forced to become granular. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to reintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think intuitive. Think robust. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also incubate compellingly. Think cross-media. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If you generate nano-virally, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to enable vertically than to deliver wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If you scale intuitively, you may have to innovate vertically. It may seem impressive, but it's true! We realize that it is better to e-enable interactively than to harness virally. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and J++. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to integrate seamlessly. We think that most bleeding-edge, strategic splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough C++. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com long-term reporting and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can productize courageously will (someday) be able to enable correctly. We have come to know that if you enhance nano-extensibly then you may also aggregate virtually. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100% accurate! We always redefine global intra-plug-and-play media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Without well-chosen real-world paradigms, methodologies are forced to become cross-platform. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think micro-macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will extend the ability of aggregation to implement. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to repurpose magnetically. Think value-added. We realize that if you drive perfectly then you may also redefine strategically. A company that can exploit easily will (someday) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our action-items but our capacity to empower. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will augment our capability to extend without diminishing our ability to upgrade. If you streamline robustly, you may have to incubate globally. What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for regulating new models? We have come to know that it is better to empower proactively than to upgrade virtually. It may seem contradictory, but it's 100 percent 100% realistic! Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for handling new returns-on-investment?