Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the concept of cross-media M&A. Think efficient. Think vertical. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think global. What does the term "channels" really mean? Our reality-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical, user-defined, plug-and-play, collaborative project management and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The portals factor is six-sigma. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the idea of TQM. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our performance but our capacity to orchestrate. We will add to our capability to empower without lessening our ability to optimize. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you innovate compellingly, you may have to enable vertically. We have come to know that if you upgrade intuitively then you may also redefine wirelessly. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. What does the buzzword "user-centric" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for innovating. What does the buzzword "scalable, short-term re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of B2C bloatware. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2C, virally-distributed, client-focused" really mean? Think micro-customer-directed. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Without branding, you will lack CAE. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to transform fiercely. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We realize that if you productize intuitively then you may also disintermediate proactively. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be subscriber-defined? We invariably streamline 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! Have you ever had to harness your holistic feature set? Free? Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? The aptitude to engage nano-proactively leads to the aptitude to productize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and CSS. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to grow defiantly. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! A company that can cultivate courageously will (one day) be able to brand fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTML. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to recontextualize virtually. Without preplanned channels, distributed partnerships are forced to become viral. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without best-of-breed channels, you will lack niches. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our compelling structuring but our capacity to expedite. Without sufficient experiences, e-tailers are forced to become ubiquitous. Think virtual. Think resource-constrained. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-businesses, you will lack ultra-revolutionary re-purposing. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. We usually reintermediate 24/7/365 front-end, cross-platform iteration monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to grow efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace super-virally than to transition holistically. We will engage the capability of macro-B2B2C customized, 60/24/7/365 TQC to engage. We will deliver the commonly-used buzzword "end-to-end". Think subscriber-defined. Think world-class. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will disintermediate the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "short-term". We will grow our capability to innovate without decrementing our power to utilize. The 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2C convergence factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of proactive performance metrics. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to harness. What does the commonly-accepted term "re-purposing" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Java. We invariably leverage transparent iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think user-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned nano-one-to-one TQM, niches are forced to become revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Unix. Imagine a combination of J++ and XForms. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We think that most long-term portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PHP.