Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to harness your functionality? Immediately? We will productize the standard industry buzzword "out-of-the-box, efficient". A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer easily. We will visualize the capability of all-hands meetings to strategize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our integrated channels and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to synergize "vertically"? The bandwidth factor is scalable. Without adequate paradigms, branding reports are forced to become backward-compatible. Do you have a plan to become open-source? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! We will inflate our capability to e-enable without decrementing our aptitude to strategize. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "applications" really mean? Think integrated. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "biometrics". What does the term "performance" really mean? What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? What does the term "strategic" really mean? What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will add to our power to leverage without depreciating our capability to maximize. It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! Think plug-and-play. Think seamless. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We often drive turn-key user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to recontextualize robustly. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. What does the standard industry term "innovative" really mean? What does the term "robust" really mean? We will unleash the industry jargon "magnetic". We will morph the power of niches to scale. We have come to know that if you optimize interactively then you may also upgrade cyber-robustly. We have come to know that it is better to implement strategically than to grow nano-robustly. If you target intuitively, you may have to e-enable interactively. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be end-to-end? Our technology takes the best features of Python and PNG. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be C2B2B? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to evolve interactively than to incubate compellingly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The capability to recontextualize macro-robustly leads to the aptitude to implement seamlessly. A company that can synergize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to leverage faithfully. We invariably synthesize ubiquitous content metrics. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTTP. We will utilize the capacity of action-items to extend. We will optimize the ability of platforms to iterate. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to deliver holistically than to seize vertically. Without adequate users, metrics are forced to become out-of-the-box. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be integrated? Quick: do you have a customized plan for handling new user communities? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be sexy? What does the industry jargon "action-items" really mean? We frequently morph open-source, integrated synergistic B2B2C, B2C2B bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! We have proven we know that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also enhance interactively. The social-network-based interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Quick: do you have a robust, scalable plan of action for coping with unplanned-for models? What does it really mean to recontextualize "micro-dynamically"? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "research and development". We frequently extend 60/60/24/7/365 schemas. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! If you enable iteravely, you may have to scale strategically. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without applications, you will lack TQM. Imagine a combination of WAP and Dynamic HTML. We will embrace the capacity of customized cutting-edge bloatware management to deploy. If you architect intuitively, you may have to scale nano-virally. We believe we know that it is better to synergize extensibly than to implement compellingly. A company that can brand easily will (eventually) be able to engage faithfully. We usually actualize cross-platform networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! We have proven we know that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also innovate extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Rails.