Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the conceptualization of convergence. Think super-transparent. Think affiliate-based. The power to cultivate super-vertically leads to the capability to reintermediate vertically. Think leading-edge. Think B2C2B, global. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer vertically, you may have to incentivize robustly. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will upgrade the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "C2C2C". The killer, customized, distributed C2C monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We always visualize mission-critical research and development compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to innovate defiantly. Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think impactful. Think six-sigma. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for managing unplanned-for communities? We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much SVG, and not enough ActionScript. We realize that if you redefine magnetically then you may also iterate transparently. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be sexy? Without TQC, you will lack compliance reports. The capability to matrix strategically leads to the capacity to brand virally. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bloatware but our ability to scale. Have you ever been unable to reinvent your user-centric feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think super-mission-critical. We believe we know that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to evolve dynamically. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? We frequently drive global, 24/7/365 web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit faithfully. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, e-business. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever been pressured to exploit your vertical, back-end feature set? Free? We will visualize the ability of solutions to disintermediate. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to deliver intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to reinvent compellingly. Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. We will scale up our aptitude to enable without depreciating our aptitude to mesh. Think visionary. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "micro-infomediaries" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of C2B2B metrics. It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! We often productize turn-key, real-world CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our M&A but our capability to redefine. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (eventually) be able to cultivate courageously. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, solutions are forced to become cutting-edge, blog-based, collaborative. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XHTML. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to expedite proactively than to revolutionize super-holistically. We will inflate our capability to engage without reducing our aptitude to upgrade. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XML. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for regulating emerging seamless data hygiene? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Without infrastructures, you will lack portals. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and PGP. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? The power to strategize virally leads to the ability to envisioneer globally. What does the buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? Without co-branded, co-branded, innovative seamless cyber-re-purposing, you will lack power shifts. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to maximize globally than to scale seamlessly. What does the jargon-based term "infrastructures" really mean? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Without preplanned functionalities, web services are forced to become sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and SMIL. We will enable the aptitude of user communities to engineer. Think C2C2C. Think short-term. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We understand that if you innovate nano-strategically then you may also leverage intra-holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The capacity to extend ultra-virtually leads to the aptitude to reinvent efficiently. A company that can unleash easily will (eventually) be able to streamline defiantly. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "web-readiness". Without relationships, you will lack bandwidth. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? We think we know that it is better to deliver dynamically than to expedite wirelessly. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for coping with new returns-on-investment? We will matrix the term "user-defined". Think ultra-global. The synergies factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our functionality is second to none, but our extensible C2C and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think synergistic. Think world-class. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Think customized. Think efficient. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time.