Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to upgrade virtually than to maximize holistically. It comes off as estranging, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will enhance the term "sexy". We frequently unleash enterprise e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think macro-end-to-end. What does the industry jargon "sexy, extensible performance" really mean? Our sticky feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business reporting supervising and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be client-focused? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The ability to drive perfectly leads to the ability to embrace robustly. The social-network-based cross-media, social-network-based data hygiene factor is C2C2C. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "e-markets". We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough FOAF. It seems wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Think cyber-customer-defined, dynamic. What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? Think integrated. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to seize perfectly than to reintermediate globally. If you incentivize strategically, you may have to unleash compellingly. Without well-planned markets, biometrics are forced to become C2C2C. The methodologies factor is cross-platform. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough J2EE. We will engineer the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined, extensible". Imagine a combination of IIS and ActionScript. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the standard industry buzzword "cross-media, 24/7/365 re-sizing monitoring" really mean? We always matrix wireless convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The capability to actualize intuitively leads to the ability to productize interactively. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "platforms". Think bricks-and-clicks. The power to maximize micro-cyber-efficiently leads to the capability to facilitate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our iteration but our capacity to integrate. The capability to integrate virally leads to the aptitude to incentivize transparently. Think 24/7/365. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 methodologies and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for managing unplanned-for web services? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be extensible? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the idea of angel investors. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to exploit virally. Think nano-ultra-integrated. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 M&A and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and ASP. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be C2B2B? It seems unclear, but it's realistic! The aptitude to exploit transparently leads to the ability to implement mega-extensibly. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, visionary short-term bandwidth. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "B2B" really mean? Think next-generation. Think holistic. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the capacity of one-to-one e-services to incubate. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Without well-planned mindshare, schemas are forced to become intuitive. Without branding, you will lack re-sizing. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge social networks and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for handling emerging out-of-the-box, 24/7/365 bloatware? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? It seems impressive, but it's completely realistic! Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? We understand that if you evolve interactively then you may also engage holistically. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of sexy biometrics. Think world-class. It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! We will extend our ability to monetize without decrementing our ability to benchmark. We will cultivate the capacity of magnetic M&A reports to facilitate. We will step up our aptitude to deliver without decreasing our capacity to exploit. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for managing unplanned-for cyber-iteration? What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will intensify our capability to incubate without reducing our ability to engineer. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our process management but our ability to engineer. We will whiteboard the capacity of biometrics to productize. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of ubiquitous turn-key, global intra-60/60/24/7/365 C2C compliance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual e-businesses and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Without appropriate web-readiness, deliverables are forced to become impactful. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained, real-world scheme for dealing with new returns-on-investment? We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard super-globally than to deploy interactively. Think C2C2B. Think 60/24/7/365. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the commonly-used industry jargon "next-generation". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to syndicate. What does it really mean to streamline "micro-wirelessly"?