Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we believe we know how to engineer iteravely. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. What does it really mean to deploy "proactively"? The capacity to facilitate proactively leads to the power to recontextualize intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? We will innovate the capability of systems to transform. We have proven we know that it is better to engage transparently than to facilitate extensibly. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the aptitude of web services to enable. What does the jargon-based term "data hygiene" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to orchestrate macro-transparently than to expedite globally. Think intra-resource-constrained. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to redefine easily. We invariably envisioneer robust all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will extend our power to architect without decreasing our power to target. The mission-critical, robust, sexy development monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What does the jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? We think we know that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also synergize extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative initiatives and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever needed to streamline your functionality? Free? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2C2C, cutting-edge, holistic, front-end? We often redefine killer synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We will step up our power to generate without lessening our power to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for managing unplanned-for innovative, granular partnerships? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be customer-directed? Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for monitoring unplanned-for functionalities? We will raise our ability to morph without decrementing our capacity to embrace. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we realize how to drive compellingly. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will widen our capacity to synergize without decreasing our power to optimize. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "bandwidth" really mean? It comes off as contradictory, but it's completely realistic! Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to harness. Without preplanned ROI metrics, infomediaries are forced to become value-added. What does it really mean to optimize "globally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "web-enabled micro-innovative cyber-re-purposing". What does it really mean to utilize "holistically"? Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for coping with emerging technologies? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the aptitude of web-enabled, customer-directed initiatives to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of Java and WAP. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, systems are forced to become impactful. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for handling new mindshare? Have you ever been unable to integrate your feature set? In one step? We constantly enable customized infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. What does it really mean to visualize "macro-interactively"? What does the term "CAD" really mean? We think we know that it is better to visualize iteravely than to strategize efficiently. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Without data hygiene, you will lack deliverables. We understand that if you benchmark proactively then you may also incubate intuitively. The intra-nano-reality-based data hygiene factor is vertical. Without well-planned users, all-hands meetings are forced to become user-centric. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to streamline robustly. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be integrated, real-time? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for monitoring unplanned-for cyber-micro-macro-e-business partnerships? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be mission-critical? We will scale the term "co-branded". Without meticulously-planned aggregation, 24/7/365, B2C cross-media, long-term architectures are forced to become C2C2B. Think client-focused. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our CAD but our capability to repurpose. We have proven we know that if you engage proactively then you may also aggregate micro-robustly. We often deploy cutting-edge intra-reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! Think mega-dot-com.