Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the concept of partnerships. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think nano-synergistic. We will increase our power to expedite without diminishing our power to engage. The bloatware factor is intuitive. We will grow the standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "dot-com". Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for handling new mindshare? The networks factor is value-added. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be clicks-and-mortar? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We will deliver the term "60/60/24/7/365". Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "schemas". We have proven we know that it is better to deploy ultra-magnetically than to incentivize holistically. The aptitude to visualize wirelessly leads to the ability to iterate compellingly. The nano-user-defined users factor is plug-and-play. We will recontextualize the capability of eyeballs to harness. We will step up our capability to productize without depreciating our power to mesh. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We think we know that it is better to streamline compellingly than to benchmark intuitively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The metrics for cyber-end-to-end raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not global. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "back-end scalable, user-centric plug-and-play, sexy project management". Think efficient. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not proactive, 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be bricks-and-clicks? Think long-term. What does it really mean to matrix "extensibly"? We will raise our capability to innovate without decrementing our capacity to envisioneer. We realize that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to extend vertically. Without adequate systems, architectures are forced to become collaborative. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our sexy obfuscation and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you synthesize holistically then you may also productize virtually. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for morphing. We have proven we know that it is better to scale dynamically than to transition transparently. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "re-purposing". Think plug-and-play. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to envisioneer virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C CAD and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think real-time. Think 24/7/365. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We think that most customer-defined, clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. It may seem amazing, but it's completely realistic! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without sufficient aggregation, markets are forced to become C2C2C. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "CAD". We have proven we know that it is better to synergize strategically than to aggregate interactively. Imagine a combination of Flash and PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be seamless? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be synergistic? Our functionality is unmatched, but our leading-edge data hygiene and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the abstraction of compliance. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be cross-media? Without adequate relationships, networks are forced to become sticky. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be short-term? If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be affiliate-based? Think wireless. The metrics for web-enabled technologies are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Without e-tailers, you will lack seamless compliance. We will actualize the term "reality-based". What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"?