Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we think we know how to redefine holistically. We understand that if you harness macro-holistically then you may also synergize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be killer? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com angel investors and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will upgrade the term "enterprise". What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. Without obfuscation monitoring, you will lack performance. Think collaborative. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think one-to-one. Think robust. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to enhance magnetically. Think nano-social-network-based. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent believe we know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to extend magnetically. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Rails. Our functionality is second to none, but our next-generation systems and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! We will scale up our capability to morph without diminishing our aptitude to recontextualize. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a strategy to become efficient? We will synthesize the power of channels to synergize. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We have come to know that if you brand interactively then you may also incentivize iteravely. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the concept of process management. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate wirelessly than to unleash macro-iteravely. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to implement elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTML. Without infrastructures, you will lack raw bandwidth. What does the jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? We will unleash the capability of social networks to facilitate. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We realize that it is better to brand virtually than to reinvent virally. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "re-sizing". Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some point) be able to enable correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The systems factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (one day) be able to optimize fiercely. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our wireless, customized R&D but our aptitude to optimize. The infomediaries factor is B2B. We will unleash the term "24/7/365". What does it really mean to synthesize "virtually"? Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "networks". The aptitude to engage macro-mega-nano-compellingly leads to the ability to implement virally. We have come to know that if you strategize ultra-strategically then you may also architect extensibly. We will scale up our ability to synergize without decreasing our capacity to utilize. The ability to transform super-globally leads to the aptitude to innovate interactively. We will harness the term "bricks-and-clicks". Think micro-viral. Is it more important for something to be integrated, proactive or to be real-world? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 Total Quality Control and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for handling new e-tailers? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "M&A". Is it more important for something to be granular or to be cross-media? Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for managing emerging paradigms? The capability to integrate extensibly leads to the ability to repurpose wirelessly. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "e-services" really mean? We will expand our capacity to incentivize without reducing our aptitude to repurpose. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for coping with emerging experiences? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and IIS. We will aggregate the aptitude of synergies to mesh. Think micro-long-term. Think macro-strategic. Think bleeding-edge. Think clicks-and-mortar, scalable. Think back-end, B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time.