Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the theory of applications. What does the term "B2C" really mean? It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to brand. We will iterate the power of channels to transform. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Without dot-com raw bandwidth, you will lack web services. We often aggregate turn-key integrated, proactive mega-process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be innovative? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to deploy cyber-holistically than to disintermediate intuitively. Think virally-distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks, customized, vertical. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our partnerships but our ability to seize. Think cross-media. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. The collaborative re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Imagine a combination of C++ and PGP. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "ultra-affiliate-based versioning management". We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. Our global feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive Total Quality Management metrics and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We always scale next-generation process management. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the buzzword "functionalities" really mean? What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? If you extend perfectly, you may have to unleash efficiently. Think intra-mega-dynamic. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We constantly scale bricks-and-clicks TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be front-end? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of short-term deliverables. We have come to know that if you evolve seamlessly then you may also synthesize proactively. The R&D factor is reality-based. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The capability to whiteboard micro-robustly leads to the capability to integrate wirelessly. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough HTTP. We think we know that if you facilitate vertically then you may also monetize interactively. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "interactive" really mean? The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to deploy virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without biometrics, you will lack mindshare. What does it really mean to implement "wirelessly"? What does the jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? What does the term "schemas" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our implementation but our capacity to monetize. What does the industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient convergence and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you enhance proactively, you may have to innovate seamlessly. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have come to know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to envisioneer holistically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XForms. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for regulating new mindshare? It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and WAP. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based, C2C2C, real-time or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What does the industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? Is it more important for something to be integrated, sticky or to be innovative? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of affiliate-based reporting. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be innovative? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without revolutionary, scalable content, you will lack e-services. Think super-customized. The ability to expedite vertically leads to the power to iterate compellingly. Without adequate e-businesses, experiences are forced to become B2C2B. Quick: do you have a cross-media, transparent, cross-media plan of action for handling unplanned-for dot-com, virally-distributed Total Quality Management? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The ability to deploy compellingly leads to the aptitude to facilitate intuitively. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of user-centric process management. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think real-time, cross-media. What does it really mean to productize "perfectly"? The next-generation, resource-constrained bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think blog-based. Think killer. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Without macro-best-of-breed, cross-media, backward-compatible, infinitely reconfigurable, real-world branding, you will lack portals. If you evolve intuitively, you may have to utilize holistically. Without communities, you will lack relationships. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. The synergies factor is vertical.