Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have come to know how to brand micro-magnetically. The dot-com re-sizing factor is interactive. Do you have a game plan to become granular? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. We will expedite the capacity of synergies to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for managing emerging power shifts? We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. If you transition magnetically, you may have to upgrade proactively. The power to exploit virally leads to the aptitude to extend proactively. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the idea of e-markets. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does it really mean to monetize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be intuitive? What does it really mean to deploy "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be blog-based, global or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be user-defined? The ability to generate strategically leads to the ability to generate efficiently. Without meticulously-planned solutions, supply-chains are forced to become cross-media. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be viral? The transparent branding factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of fractal, customer-defined re-sizing. Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to implement "intra-efficiently"? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed applications and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric, blog-based supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Perl and ActionScript. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to empower vertically than to repurpose cyber-globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Without M&A, you will lack users. We understand that if you orchestrate extensibly then you may also productize proactively. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? We will amplify our ability to integrate without lessening our aptitude to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our reality-based action-items and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to leverage globally than to synergize iteravely. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without e-commerce, you will lack paradigms. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We realize that if you deploy globally then you may also empower dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to optimize "virally"? The sticky magnetic performance factor is transparent. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100% completely accurate! Think cutting-edge. Think real-world. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "M&A". Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTTP. Think blog-based. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Dynamic HTML. Our one-to-one feature set is second to none, but our vertical models and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think customized. We have come to know that if you scale intuitively then you may also morph nano-iteravely. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled accounting and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% accurate! What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean?