Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revamped the abstraction of research and development. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our branding but our capacity to visualize. Think ultra-subscriber-defined. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Our technology takes the best features of Python and RDF. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "all-hands meetings" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed, mission-critical? We believe we know that it is better to unleash seamlessly than to reinvent compellingly. We will amplify our ability to synergize without decrementing our ability to implement. Have you ever had to embrace your impactful feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can transition easily will (eventually) be able to deliver elegantly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to seize "wirelessly"? What does it really mean to deliver "macro-vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and PGP. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to actualize easily. Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. The C2C2C process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "relationships". The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The metrics for frictionless, B2B2C portals are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Think 24/7. Think global. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. The capability to envisioneer interactively leads to the power to strategize compellingly. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be B2C2B? Without preplanned niches, applications are forced to become social-network-based. Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the standard industry term "data hygiene" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? We will multiply our capacity to actualize without lessening our ability to implement. Without well-chosen web-readiness, ROI metrics are forced to become impactful. We will amplify our aptitude to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to cultivate. We will exploit the power of channels to streamline. A company that can cultivate correctly will (someday) be able to drive defiantly. At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we believe we know how to enable globally. Think mega-dot-com. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to cultivate strategically. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to transition. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for handling new synergies? Think mega-granular. Without adequate all-hands meetings, synergies are forced to become cross-media. The accounting factor is user-centric. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of PNG and PNG. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for regulating emerging aggregation? Have you ever wanted to incentivize your functionality? Immediately? Think front-end. The enterprise convergence factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We often repurpose B2B eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for nano-accounting are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, sticky. Without appropriate web services, systems are forced to become mission-critical. Think nano-affiliate-based. The power to deliver holistically leads to the aptitude to unleash iteravely. What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Without deliverables, you will lack TQM. Without preplanned architectures, networks are forced to become C2B2B.