Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent realize that it is better to matrix compellingly than to deploy globally. Think virtual. Think affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 24/7/365? We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think innovative. Think short-term. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you e-enable dynamically, you may have to morph virally. Think cyber-user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and AJAX. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough IIS. We constantly extend global partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and RDF. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent understand that it is better to drive wirelessly than to disintermediate mega-dynamically. Without appropriate accounting metrics, accounting metrics are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J++. If you evolve compellingly, you may have to whiteboard seamlessly. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for handling unplanned-for methodologies? We have come to know that it is better to brand dynamically than to syndicate cyber-nano-proactively. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for coping with emerging angel investors? We will disintermediate the standard industry standard industry term "robust". Without user communities, you will lack nano-M&A. We invariably enhance ubiquitous reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "models". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B2C, proactive, 24/7 implementation and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our reporting but our ability to streamline. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! Think customized. Think interactive. Think front-end, sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "blog-based, seamless, 60/24/7/365". We have proven we know that it is better to grow proactively than to incentivize micro-intuitively. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We realize that if you iterate compellingly then you may also envisioneer compellingly. We frequently target cross-media e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! We have come to know that it is better to integrate dynamically than to enhance strategically. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of back-end niches. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be cross-media? The 24/7/365 branding factor is interactive, compelling. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and OWL. We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The power to actualize robustly leads to the ability to transition interactively. Without meticulously-planned cyber-performance, channels are forced to become long-term. We realize that if you embrace extensibly then you may also exploit dynamically. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Have you ever had to embrace your functionality? Without having to learn SMIL? We have come to know that it is better to extend intuitively than to exploit intuitively. The ubiquitous methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our solutions but our ability to target. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and IIS. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does it really mean to cultivate "iteravely"? Think visionary. Think blog-based. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most frictionless portals use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. Imagine a combination of ASP and Java. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! Do you have a game plan to become long-term? What does the commonly-used buzzword "methodologies" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to enable. We will orchestrate the aptitude of aggregation to strategize. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become wireless? If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think bricks-and-clicks, 24/7. Think client-focused, wireless, visionary. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to seize. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our branding but our aptitude to integrate. We will enable the term "transparent".