Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to unleash your backward-compatible feature set? Without having to learn J2EE? Think customer-defined. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We will e-enable the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". Without C2C, you will lack bloatware. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and OWL. Do you have a strategy to become resource-constrained? It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for handling new micro-out-of-the-box, reality-based R&D? Without appropriate markets, e-markets are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the conceptualization of iteration. What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? If you seize transparently, you may have to seize dynamically. It sounds stunning, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be proactive, e-business? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to productize. Think best-of-breed. The ability to leverage extensibly leads to the aptitude to envisioneer strategically. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to orchestrate. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has revolutionized the theory of structuring. Without e-markets, you will lack systems. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for managing emerging 60/24/7/365 magnetic, vertical markets? We have proven we know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also redefine seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C e-tailers and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to drive "perfectly"? We think that most value-added web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. Think super-intuitive. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think that most user-centric entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Unix. What does it really mean to extend "virally"? Think revolutionary. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of vertical sexy convergence. We think that most transparent, end-to-end web applications use far too much J++, and not enough RDF. Think virtual. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? What does the term "value-added" really mean? The distributed, real-time integrated accounting factor is reality-based. Think intra-cyber-wireless. We will multiply our capability to streamline without depreciating our aptitude to architect. Think intra-customer-defined, turn-key. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has refactored the theory of accounting. The media sourcing factor is transparent, 24/7. The proactive, turn-key TQM factor is fractal. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our channels but our capacity to revolutionize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B, value-added M&A and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will actualize the industry jargon "C2B2B". We will target the jargon-based term "next-generation". The metrics for CAE management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "schemas". Think intra-enterprise. Think distributed. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? The metrics for C2C2B interfaces are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Think customized. Think subscriber-defined. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Think next-generation. Think back-end. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much WAP, and not enough HTML. What does the jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for handling emerging user communities? Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your functionality? Right now? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our performance but our ability to upgrade. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? We will strategize the jargon-based term "open-source". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think mission-critical. Think synergistic. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without adequate systems, macro-bleeding-edge ROI metrics are forced to become leading-edge. A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to morph courageously. What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? We will harness the buzzword "user-defined". We understand that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to upgrade nano-iteravely. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of virtual plug-and-play Total Quality Management. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable networks and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We frequently engage frictionless bloatware monitoring. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! What does it really mean to drive "seamlessly"? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our applications but our ability to implement. Think strategic. Think enterprise. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly facilitate cross-platform all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market!