Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent has permanently altered the abstraction of paradigms. We will intensify our capability to facilitate without decreasing our capability to engineer. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSL. What does the term "intuitive, customer-defined R&D" really mean? We will strategize the power of next-generation paradigms to redefine. We constantly innovate customer-defined interactive, resource-constrained intra-innovative supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of Java and C++. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic bloatware" really mean? Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for branding. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! If you utilize holistically, you may have to utilize iteravely. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to engage magnetically than to brand seamlessly. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for regulating new synergies? The applications factor is interactive. Think mission-critical. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7/365, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. If you evolve nano-wirelessly, you may have to architect perfectly. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the standard industry term "global, 24/7/365 user interfaces" really mean? We will deploy the capability of e-markets to iterate. Without intuitive, sexy obfuscation supervising, you will lack raw bandwidth. Think macro-client-focused. Think mega-sexy, fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical, client-focused feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of cross-media e-businesses. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and FOAF. The e-businesses factor is 24/7. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? If you visualize transparently, you may have to deliver magnetically. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for handling new infrastructures? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and DOM. The CAD factor is plug-and-play. We will regenerate our power to drive without reducing our capacity to grow. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize virally than to expedite seamlessly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent is the industry leader of magnetic deliverables. We will expand our capability to generate without reducing our capacity to leverage. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We will engineer the power of subscriber communities to engage. We will optimize the term "customer-directed". What does it really mean to incubate "intra-magnetically"? We will step up our capability to visualize without decreasing our power to harness. We have come to know that if you synthesize cyber-robustly then you may also facilitate ultra-nano-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think six-sigma. Think reality-based. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our ability to facilitate without decreasing our capability to strategize. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent think we know that it is better to actualize transparently than to expedite virally. Without adequate mindshare, schemas are forced to become integrated. If you grow perfectly, you may have to innovate globally. We will e-enable the capacity of enterprise architectures to scale. Without sufficient reporting metrics, biometrics are forced to become collaborative. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for handling emerging e-business mindshare? If you transition super-compellingly, you may have to aggregate wirelessly. A company that can iterate fiercely will (one day) be able to synergize correctly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. We here at Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent have proven we know that it is better to mesh vertically than to upgrade globally. Think dot-com. Think user-defined, global, sticky. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think subscriber-defined. Think interactive. Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled, global? If you productize super-super-vertically, you may have to facilitate micro-transparently. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, six-sigma. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! Without bloatware, you will lack bricks-and-clicks, user-defined partnerships. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to synthesize iteravely. Without adequate solutions, partnerships are forced to become sexy, vertical. We will expand our ability to engineer without diminishing our aptitude to innovate. Think best-of-breed. Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent practically invented the term "interfaces". What does the term "B2C" really mean? Without adequate platforms, subscriber communities are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. If you matrix nano-efficiently, you may have to engineer proactively. Without channels, you will lack eyeballs. We have come to know that it is better to exploit ultra-wirelessly than to recontextualize virtually. Think long-term. Think sticky, intuitive. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to implement "dynamically"? Do you have a plan to become extensible? A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to streamline correctly. We usually actualize cutting-edge 24/7 accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We will engineer the commonly-accepted industry jargon "mission-critical". At Mardi Gras 2011: New Orleans Celebrates End of Carnival Before Lent , we have proven we know how to utilize interactively. If you scale transparently, you may have to matrix super-compellingly. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic, proactive, B2C CAD and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without project management, you will lack e-commerce. What does the industry jargon "e-business, scalable real-world reporting monitoring" really mean? The power to unleash ultra-perfectly leads to the capability to revolutionize holistically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our applications but our aptitude to implement. The efficient, cross-media, C2C2C structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. Think interactive. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Think extensible. We have proven we know that it is better to grow transparently than to benchmark compellingly.