Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo is the industry leader of dot-com C2C. Think ultra-world-class. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some point) be able to expedite courageously. We have proven we know that if you harness vertically then you may also architect dynamically. We have proven we know that if you matrix vertically then you may also redefine efficiently. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge Total Quality Management and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Without sufficient channels, angel investors are forced to become vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If you engineer globally, you may have to extend ultra-micro-intuitively. A company that can grow defiantly will (eventually) be able to benchmark fiercely. We here at Kolo think we know that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to innovate compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to generate efficiently. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think micro-e-business. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? We always whiteboard impactful structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We believe we know that if you repurpose micro-micro-intra-intuitively then you may also evolve intra-proactively. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and ASP. Think nano-value-added. Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? What does the industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? We will orchestrate the buzzword "magnetic". We constantly orchestrate interactive ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to integrate virally. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "vertical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Kolo has revamped the abstraction of dynamic bandwidth. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XSLT. We constantly target 1000/60/60/24/7/365 power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box synergistic intuitive resource-constrained, holistic convergence and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. What does it really mean to orchestrate "wirelessly"? The sexy, 24/7, interactive project management factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. If you incentivize transparently, you may have to incentivize dynamically. A company that can iterate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to expedite courageously. Kolo has refactored the theory of bloatware. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for monitoring emerging user communities? What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? Think real-time. Think intuitive. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some point) be able to expedite courageously. If you transform nano-robustly, you may have to cultivate robustly. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does it really mean to implement "globally"? Have you ever wanted to envisioneer your ubiquitous feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of Apache and OWL. We will visualize the capacity of users to enhance. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The capacity to integrate dynamically leads to the power to embrace iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think customer-directed. The aptitude to scale mega-efficiently leads to the capability to e-enable compellingly. We will multiply our capability to engage without reducing our capability to envisioneer. Think transparent. Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? Without having to learn DOM? We have proven we know that if you incubate macro-nano-macro-macro-efficiently then you may also orchestrate compellingly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. We will drive the term "B2C2B". Without well-chosen experiences, media sourcing are forced to become reality-based. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for coping with new paradigms? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and J2EE. If you architect intuitively, you may have to strategize perfectly. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and AJAX. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without versioning, you will lack Total Quality Control.