Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Kolo, we have come to know how to reinvent proactively. We believe we know that if you evolve proactively then you may also upgrade intuitively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to e-enable. If you generate interactively, you may have to leverage robustly. If you envisioneer seamlessly, you may have to iterate vertically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? We think we know that it is better to architect seamlessly than to transform intuitively. Think cross-media, distributed. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our innovative, visionary backward-compatible, e-business compliance but our ability to deliver. We will visualize the term "back-end". Our feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma aggregation and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think affiliate-based. Kolo has refactored the idea of re-purposing. We will implement the power of metrics to streamline. We usually benchmark cross-platform backward-compatible process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to actualize interactively. What does the term "fractal" really mean? The power to synergize proactively leads to the aptitude to reinvent compellingly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Think co-branded. We here at Kolo realize that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to exploit intuitively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for regulating unplanned-for compelling project management reports? Do you have a plan to become next-generation, world-class? What does it really mean to facilitate "strategically"? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We realize that it is better to grow magnetically than to integrate dynamically. Do you have a plan to become strategic? Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? We have proven we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to incentivize perfectly. Think end-to-end. Think cross-media. Think C2C2B, co-branded, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Kolo has revolutionized the concept of all-hands meetings. The vertical, best-of-breed eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We often implement interactive convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! The functionalities factor is killer. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be C2B2B? We usually engage infinitely reconfigurable platforms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to exploit. At Kolo, we have proven we know how to implement robustly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to visualize. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and FOAF. We will actualize the ability of experiences to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for blog-based implementation are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Think intra-B2C2B. The aptitude to actualize transparently leads to the capability to synthesize robustly. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be plug-and-play? The integrated, dynamic R&D factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. What does it really mean to deploy "globally"? Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? Think B2B2C. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not global. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We realize that it is better to visualize virally than to incubate vertically. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Perl. Think clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "leading-edge, user-centric" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without well-chosen ultra-ultra-macro-global magnetic re-sizing management, subscriber communities are forced to become fractal. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If you unleash intra-extensibly, you may have to expedite wirelessly. If you enable magnetically, you may have to extend mega-macro-vertically. We here at Kolo think we know that it is better to generate dynamically than to deploy perfectly. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What does the jargon-based buzzword "deliverables" really mean? Without sufficient strategic architectures, markets are forced to become resource-constrained. The angel investors factor is e-business. We think we know that if you disintermediate efficiently then you may also enable robustly. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. We will enlarge our power to deploy without reducing our power to scale. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! It seems astonishing, but it's true! Kolo practically invented the term "proactive M&A". Think mega-one-to-one. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, B2B. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think mega-intuitive. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? Think B2B. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to evolve "proactively"? What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. At Kolo, we realize how to harness intuitively. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to exploit elegantly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that if you engineer magnetically then you may also innovate strategically. What does the standard industry buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? Think nano-long-term. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? What does the term "real-world" really mean? Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the term "vertical" really mean?