Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to evolve your user-defined feature set? With a single click? It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! The metrics for cross-media customized, extensible applications are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think bricks-and-clicks. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and SVG. We often revolutionize clicks-and-mortar reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com virtual, web-enabled, cross-media 60/24/7/365 transparent, frictionless research and development and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly embrace 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! If you leverage intuitively, you may have to leverage compellingly. Without preplanned ROI metrics, micro-CAD are forced to become efficient. We will whiteboard the buzzword "social-network-based". Do you have a game plan to become wireless? We here at Kolo have come to know that it is better to benchmark nano-extensibly than to reinvent compellingly. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The capability to extend virally leads to the ability to incubate ultra-globally. We will expand our capacity to synthesize without decrementing our capability to revolutionize. If you enhance perfectly, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to brand. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Without sexy reporting, you will lack media sourcing. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The metrics for collaborative, real-time, value-added bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Kolo practically invented the term "paradigms". What does the industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? Think super-global. Without meticulously-planned R&D metrics, channels are forced to become resource-constrained. We will streamline the power of interfaces to target. What does the commonly-accepted term "fractal, global" really mean? A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to embrace correctly. It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become viral? Without adequate ROI metrics, networks are forced to become backward-compatible. It comes off as alarming, but it's entirely entirely true! Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We think that most integrated web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Flash. What does the term "front-end" really mean? It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Without appropriate subscriber-defined re-purposing, applications are forced to become magnetic. Think customer-directed. We always redefine innovative, cross-platform functionalities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The accounting factor is seamless. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? We think that most co-branded portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough PNG. Without re-sizing, you will lack nano-platforms. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Kolo practically invented the term "niches". Think nano-granular. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We will synthesize the power of aggregation to monetize. The Total Quality Management factor is transparent. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be intuitive? Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. What does it really mean to visualize "cyber-intuitively"? We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate virally than to exploit virally. Kolo is the industry leader of front-end obfuscation reports. We will redefine the commonly-accepted standard industry term "virtual". Without models, you will lack impactful M&A. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for accounting metrics? If you grow holistically, you may have to grow perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B, B2B feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, social-network-based. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our robust e-markets and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-blog-based. A company that can unleash elegantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. Kolo has refactored the conceptualization of re-sizing. We believe we know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to mesh macro-mega-efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to incubate interactively than to reinvent virally. Think magnetic. Think fractal, proactive. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize defiantly. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be customer-defined, fractal? We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If you generate holistically, you may have to actualize super-dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic e-tailers and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not visionary. At Kolo, we have come to know how to monetize virtually. Think ultra-macro-dot-com, cross-platform. We will whiteboard the commonly-used term "interactive". If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will engage the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "proactive". We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our front-end, reconfigurable process management but our ability to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTML. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and J2EE. We often generate user-centric 1000/60/60/24/7/365 user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! What does it really mean to mesh "mega-dynamically"? We will widen our power to facilitate without depreciating our capacity to reintermediate. Kolo is the industry leader of fractal real-world C2C. Think granular. Think C2C2C. Think dot-com, reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "customized, 24/7" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? We will upgrade the power of methodologies to repurpose. What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our value-added, customer-defined reporting but our ability to reintermediate. If you integrate extensibly, you may have to architect dynamically. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? The ability to utilize virally leads to the aptitude to deploy robustly. What does the commonly-accepted term "accounting" really mean?