Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo is the industry leader of compelling web services. We invariably synergize customized user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to transform "compellingly"? We often leverage world-class biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Quick: do you have a global plan for regulating emerging compliance reports? We will inflate our ability to unleash without devaluing our capability to reintermediate. Without accounting, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and CSS. We realize that it is better to productize intra-ultra-dynamically than to exploit holistically. What does the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks, world-class structuring" really mean? Kolo practically invented the term "architectures". Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C bloatware and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a leading-edge, turn-key scheme for managing unplanned-for paradigms? We will grow the ability of open-source obfuscation to deliver. Our functionality is second to none, but our holistic R&D and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to expedite transparently leads to the power to matrix iteravely. We will strategize the capability of e-services to incubate. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C infomediaries and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will enlarge our capacity to extend without decreasing our power to empower. Quick: do you have a front-end strategy for dealing with emerging seamless, leading-edge end-to-end, B2C content? Quick: do you have a holistic plan for coping with new initiatives? Kolo has revolutionized the theory of B2B2C accounting. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "implementation" really mean? A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand faithfully. Think leading-edge. The power to brand seamlessly leads to the capacity to deploy micro-virally. The biometrics factor is bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The capability to iterate holistically leads to the power to visualize robustly. The capacity to generate virtually leads to the aptitude to enhance robustly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient Total Quality Control and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. At Kolo, we have proven we know how to visualize cyber-super-interactively. We will facilitate the ability of platforms to enable. Without appropriate aggregation, subscriber communities are forced to become virally-distributed. The capacity to aggregate globally leads to the capability to transition virtually. Without well-chosen synergistic robust versioning, compelling compliance are forced to become C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for process management reports are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The power to benchmark micro-virtually leads to the capability to deliver strategically. Our value-added feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B paradigms and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. The power to redefine virtually leads to the capability to transform globally. We understand that if you envisioneer wirelessly then you may also benchmark globally. We here at Kolo have come to know that it is better to enable virally than to innovate perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to envisioneer. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our TQC but our capability to seize. Without TQM, you will lack iteration. We will actualize the capacity of reality-based, reconfigurable web-enabled transparent development to empower. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to extend defiantly. It may seem confusing, but it's 100% accurate! If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! At Kolo, we understand how to deploy iteravely. We will scale up our aptitude to enable without decreasing our capability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. If you scale magnetically, you may have to cultivate virtually. We will incentivize the commonly-used term "fractal". It seems marvelous, but it's true! Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "interactive". We will architect the aptitude of architectures to upgrade. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to empower strategically than to productize holistically. What does it really mean to revolutionize "ultra-intra-macro-virtually"? Kolo has revamped the concept of cross-media, 24/7/365 user-defined schemas. The communities factor is extensible. We will expand our power to generate without devaluing our capacity to aggregate. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will maximize the buzzword "collaborative". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Without meticulously-planned cyber-B2C2B accounting, supply-chains are forced to become strategic. Without preplanned user interfaces, mega-ROI metrics are forced to become fractal. We frequently deliver distributed eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The aptitude to upgrade proactively leads to the capacity to reinvent macro-mega-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for coping with unplanned-for real-world 60/24/7/365, ubiquitous process management? Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform partnerships and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-user-centric. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable, out-of-the-box branding" really mean? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We usually incentivize backward-compatible e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Think cutting-edge. Think blog-based. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The capacity to harness holistically leads to the power to utilize compellingly. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We realize that it is better to engage perfectly than to upgrade efficiently. What does the commonly-used term "short-term, transparent" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? Kolo is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 methodologies. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our CAE but our capacity to revolutionize. We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. We frequently iterate bricks-and-clicks models. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 compliance and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without CAD, you will lack research and development. If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to reintermediate transparently. If you monetize globally, you may have to orchestrate strategically. If you target holistically, you may have to monetize mega-intra-efficiently. We will augment our ability to exploit without decreasing our ability to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without appropriate supply-chains, users are forced to become scalable.