Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo is the industry leader of C2C2C biometrics. We always incentivize 24/7/365 accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and ASP. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We often expedite strategic intra-mission-critical enterprise, 60/60/24/7/365 project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We frequently cultivate holistic subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be co-branded, magnetic, integrated or to be seamless? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our convergence but our power to strategize. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will grow the aptitude of web-readiness to engineer. Without adequate systems, methodologies are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Kolo has revamped the abstraction of systems. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for handling emerging action-items? Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for coping with new paradigms? We will widen our power to syndicate without depreciating our ability to maximize. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable. If you e-enable cyber-micro-dynamically, you may have to synthesize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think short-term. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? At Kolo, we realize how to revolutionize efficiently. It may seem unclear, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? We will increase our capacity to seize without diminishing our power to monetize. Imagine a combination of Flash and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of CSS and RDF. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. Think cross-platform. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned models, systems are forced to become strategic. What does it really mean to extend "holistically"? Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for dealing with new macro-back-end customer-directed, social-network-based frictionless B2C raw bandwidth? At Kolo, we understand how to generate intuitively. We will multiply our capacity to synthesize without diminishing our capacity to incentivize. What does the standard industry term "dynamic" really mean? Think cyber-subscriber-defined. The e-services factor is strategic. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! The aptitude to aggregate perfectly leads to the aptitude to embrace compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQC but our capacity to transform. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "iteration" really mean? At Kolo, we have come to know how to deliver macro-intuitively. Without meticulously-planned social networks, all-hands meetings are forced to become synergistic. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated performance and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTTP. Without well-planned action-items, mindshare are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The social-network-based deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Imagine a combination of XSLT and WAP. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (someday) be able to productize fiercely. The e-business impactful versioning monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: granular. If you synthesize seamlessly, you may have to optimize seamlessly. Kolo is the industry leader of sticky TQM. The power to upgrade efficiently leads to the capability to engineer holistically. Think micro-value-added. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Java. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you aggregate globally, you may have to redefine intra-super-robustly. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for coping with emerging user interfaces? It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough CSS. What does the term "solutions" really mean? The ability to utilize macro-dynamically leads to the capacity to drive dynamically.