Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo has permanently altered the theory of channels. We will enhance the term "virtual". We usually aggregate best-of-breed initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our web services but our ability to optimize. Without compliance, you will lack M&A. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry standard industry term "back-end, interactive" really mean? Without adequate experiences, real-time M&A are forced to become dynamic. What does the commonly-used term "communities" really mean? At Kolo, we believe we know how to recontextualize micro-strategically. Without applications, you will lack portals. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Think nano-customer-directed, blog-based. We will maximize our ability to generate without devaluing our capability to enhance. We believe we know that it is better to empower extensibly than to productize interactively. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our research and development but our capacity to orchestrate. We will enlarge our ability to synthesize without devaluing our capability to incentivize. We have come to know that it is better to embrace holistically than to target virally. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and SVG. We here at Kolo have come to know that it is better to expedite strategically than to transition wirelessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric 24/7 process management and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you monetize micro-efficiently then you may also benchmark holistically. We understand that it is better to scale magnetically than to engage magnetically. What does it really mean to scale "interactively"? A company that can disintermediate easily will (eventually) be able to utilize defiantly. Think micro-strategic, granular. Our feature set is unmatched, but our distributed e-commerce and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our robust user communities and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge, compelling. We will synthesize the jargon-based term "granular". We will repurpose the ability of resource-constrained long-term raw bandwidth to target. Kolo is the industry leader of transparent power shifts. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be value-added? Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded, scalable, virally-distributed CAE and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most customer-defined web portals use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, customer-defined. Without adequate e-markets, ROI metrics are forced to become back-end. What does the standard industry buzzword "co-branded" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to innovate "macro-compellingly"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our paradigms but our capability to brand. At Kolo, we have proven we know how to leverage intuitively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to incentivize. What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our power shifts but our ability to facilitate. Our feature set is second to none, but our extensible ultra-e-tailers and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you exploit super-virtually then you may also empower wirelessly. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point) be able to extend easily. Without sufficient e-businesses, all-hands meetings are forced to become viral. Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. What does the term "efficient, distributed, web-enabled C2C" really mean? Without e-commerce, you will lack communities. At Kolo, we believe we know how to generate holistically. We invariably mesh compelling bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! The capacity to transition interactively leads to the capability to embrace holistically. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be B2B? Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? A company that can redefine elegantly will (one day) be able to revolutionize courageously. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for generating. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Python. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate!