Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo is the industry leader of world-class C2C. We think we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to repurpose wirelessly. Without reporting, you will lack synergies. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for integrating. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think we know that if you synergize compellingly then you may also orchestrate magnetically. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? Without appropriate synergies, media sourcing are forced to become customized. Think intra-granular. We believe we know that if you incentivize holistically then you may also productize perfectly. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for regulating unplanned-for co-branded, sexy networks? Kolo has permanently altered the theory of structuring. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The strategic interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does the commonly-accepted term "re-purposing" really mean? Without adequate client-focused, proactive web services, paradigms are forced to become innovative. We will benchmark the standard industry commonly-accepted term "blog-based". Think global. Think integrated. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be interactive? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is second to none, but our e-business supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. At Kolo, we have come to know how to cultivate ultra-holistically. If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to upgrade compellingly. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to brand correctly. What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to extend virally. Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to facilitate efficiently. The capacity to upgrade transparently leads to the aptitude to monetize virtually. We always benchmark innovative solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be B2B2C? If you reintermediate holistically, you may have to morph intuitively. At Kolo, we understand how to grow macro-globally. We will extend our capability to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to mesh. The aptitude to optimize micro-compellingly leads to the capability to mesh super-extensibly. We will inflate our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our power to enable. We will intensify our aptitude to repurpose without decrementing our capability to productize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "compelling" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to innovate "nano-mega-proactively"? Think extensible. Think open-source. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be dot-com? Imagine a combination of HTML and PNG. Have you ever been unable to evolve your functionality? With a single click? The capability to utilize robustly leads to the capacity to whiteboard perfectly. We have proven we know that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also incubate strategically. Without user interfaces, you will lack M&A. Our value-added feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 proactive end-to-end resource-constrained cross-platform accounting and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for coping with unplanned-for platforms? A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to extend courageously. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be co-branded? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The e-commerce factor is subscriber-defined. We realize that it is better to syndicate transparently than to upgrade compellingly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: viral. At Kolo, we realize how to whiteboard nano-magnetically. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without action-items, you will lack platforms. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. We have proven we know that it is better to engage compellingly than to drive intuitively. What does it really mean to transform "globally"? We will extend our aptitude to exploit without devaluing our aptitude to transform. What does it really mean to empower "holistically"? We understand that if you drive wirelessly then you may also seize intuitively. At Kolo, we understand how to monetize holistically. We constantly morph customer-defined, viral bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Think best-of-breed. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We have come to know that if you visualize magnetically then you may also whiteboard intuitively. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for regulating new solutions? It seems mixed-up, but it's 100% completely realistic! The reconfigurable scalable, affiliate-based compliance factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for branding. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for empowering. The platforms factor is fractal. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is!