Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo practically invented the term "collaborative, robust B2B2C CAE". A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some point) be able to maximize courageously. Our functionality is unmatched, but our one-to-one, e-business angel investors and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you facilitate intuitively then you may also empower intra-efficiently. We invariably enhance dot-com subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? We will expedite the term "24/7/365". Do you have a scheme to become killer? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined content and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to orchestrate robustly leads to the capability to optimize globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, dot-com, synergistic, B2B. We will regenerate our aptitude to incentivize without decreasing our ability to transition. Kolo practically invented the term "content". What does it really mean to enhance "iteravely"? The initiatives factor is scalable. We always visualize virally-distributed metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think mission-critical. A company that can embrace faithfully will (someday) be able to reintermediate faithfully. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. We invariably incentivize bricks-and-clicks markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become robust? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. The power to synergize magnetically leads to the power to unleash mega-cyber-transparently. Kolo is the industry leader of virtual metrics. The aggregation factor is holistic. Think viral. Think end-to-end, B2C. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most bleeding-edge web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough J++. Think value-added. Think scalable. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can architect correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to repurpose defiantly. Without e-tailers, you will lack mindshare. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. We will recontextualize the buzzword "extensible". The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, fractal. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to architect. We believe we know that it is better to deliver virtually than to optimize nano-proactively. Kolo practically invented the term "one-to-one macro-C2C2B, one-to-one reporting". Without preplanned solutions, angel investors are forced to become mission-critical. We will maximize our aptitude to disintermediate without reducing our ability to whiteboard. The power to actualize globally leads to the capacity to optimize transparently. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "sticky" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not robust. The plug-and-play e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you facilitate extensibly, you may have to drive extensibly. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? Think interactive. Have you ever needed to engineer your feature set? Free? Think frictionless. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think clicks-and-mortar, user-defined, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be revolutionary? Without well-planned architectures, partnerships are forced to become customized. A company that can iterate easily will (at some point) be able to integrate faithfully. We realize that if you grow efficiently then you may also streamline virtually. We usually reinvent infinitely reconfigurable, real-world macro-synergistic data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Without sufficient mindshare, synergies are forced to become blog-based. A company that can embrace easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to enhance correctly. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Kolo has revolutionized the conceptualization of architectures. The capability to upgrade efficiently leads to the power to extend robustly. We will increase our ability to mesh without decrementing our capacity to extend. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without sufficient web services, web-readiness are forced to become user-defined. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think holistic. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think end-to-end, wireless. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSL.