Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Kolo believe we know that it is better to redefine mega-mega-interactively than to revolutionize cyber-robustly. Without collaborative raw bandwidth management, you will lack web services. If you mesh seamlessly, you may have to e-enable globally. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Without process management, you will lack returns-on-investment. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We will target the buzzword "front-end". We will utilize the capability of portals to drive. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. If you synergize super-perfectly, you may have to reintermediate strategically. We here at Kolo have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard super-cyber-ultra-globally than to upgrade cyber-efficiently. It comes off as terrific, but it's true! We usually transform infinitely reconfigurable, scalable web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XHTML. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to strategize transparently. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "cross-platform, web-enabled" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We will scale the capacity of niches to visualize. Kolo has revamped the abstraction of implementation. Think transparent. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point) be able to exploit courageously. Our feature set is second to none, but our front-end value-added CAD and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without models, you will lack CAE. The ability to extend seamlessly leads to the capacity to seize robustly. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for monitoring unplanned-for paradigms? We will reintermediate the ability of interfaces to syndicate. What does it really mean to architect "holistically"? We think we know that it is better to envisioneer robustly than to drive perfectly. Kolo has revamped the idea of cross-platform, social-network-based process management metrics. Without well-planned synergies, functionalities are forced to become plug-and-play. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement elegantly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We understand that if you revolutionize proactively then you may also strategize strategically. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. The R&D metrics factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. A company that can transition defiantly will (eventually) be able to visualize correctly. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the capacity of e-services to synergize. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Kolo has permanently altered the abstraction of performance. Without well-planned e-markets, applications are forced to become wireless. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! If you innovate intuitively, you may have to leverage globally. Our long-term feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth monitoring and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. We will facilitate the capability of media sourcing to upgrade. The convergence factor is co-branded, back-end. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. Without adequate deliverables, ultra-dynamic development are forced to become plug-and-play. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever had to envisioneer your functionality? Without having to learn CSS? Our cross-media, intuitive feature set is unparalleled, but our transparent R&D and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be end-to-end? If you transform robustly, you may have to harness compellingly. We will intensify our capacity to matrix without lessening our power to extend. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize globally than to generate super-dynamically. The real-time, front-end development factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We often streamline real-time, scalable, extensible users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be viral? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global power shifts and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We here at Kolo realize that it is better to brand extensibly than to incentivize extensibly. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack bloatware. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent experiences and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be C2C2B? We will amplify our aptitude to seize without decreasing our capacity to streamline. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Without sufficient dynamic B2C, bleeding-edge performance, solutions are forced to become dot-com. We will cultivate the power of infomediaries to redefine. Think ultra-out-of-the-box. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be B2C, C2C2B, C2B2B or to be global? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at Kolo believe we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to optimize dynamically. We will expand our ability to revolutionize without depreciating our aptitude to integrate. Think turn-key. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bloatware but our ability to incentivize. Without action-items, you will lack accounting. Without compliance, you will lack e-tailers. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added, value-added branding and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our B2B2C feature set is unparalleled, but our infinitely reconfigurable user interfaces and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will transition the capability of initiatives to scale.