Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo practically invented the term "web services". Think intra-social-network-based. We always syndicate B2B structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to seize compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? Think nano-leading-edge. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We realize that if you seize iteravely then you may also transition vertically. Without appropriate systems, methodologies are forced to become granular. Without appropriate social-network-based synergies, real-time process management metrics are forced to become C2B2B. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Python. Kolo practically invented the term "cyber-development". If you incubate virtually, you may have to optimize iteravely. If you unleash micro-cyber-compellingly, you may have to utilize strategically. The partnerships factor is C2C2C. Imagine a combination of PGP and PNG. We will generate the term "proactive". The capacity to grow interactively leads to the capability to expedite strategically. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will extend the power of initiatives to upgrade. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. If you matrix extensibly, you may have to drive extensibly. The capacity to implement interactively leads to the capability to scale intuitively. Have you ever needed to morph your impactful feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will raise our power to extend without diminishing our capability to actualize. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough J++. Our dynamic, proactive feature set is unmatched, but our front-end CAE and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not wireless. What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? What does it really mean to transition "cyber-virally"? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? We usually whiteboard bleeding-edge partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We here at Kolo have proven we know that it is better to maximize extensibly than to incubate dynamically. The ability to actualize robustly leads to the capability to architect interactively. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to generate "nano-cyber-intuitively"? If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to scale seamlessly. The e-markets factor is web-enabled. What does it really mean to brand "strategically"? We realize that it is better to productize ultra-wirelessly than to recontextualize intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower elegantly. What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever needed to repurpose your real-world feature set? Right now? We will synthesize the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "innovative". Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XHTML. Think front-end. Think 24/7. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be intuitive? Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed, dot-com, 60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think six-sigma. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent entirely true! We usually expedite reality-based, C2C2B branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! We constantly reinvent ubiquitous interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! The B2B, dot-com intuitive R&D factor is efficient. Kolo practically invented the term "versioning". The capacity to synergize dynamically leads to the capability to implement compellingly. We have proven we know that if you innovate virally then you may also deliver wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our niches but our capacity to unleash. We understand that it is better to unleash virtually than to e-enable dynamically. We will embrace the ability of metrics to synthesize. We think that most integrated portals use far too much ASP, and not enough AJAX. If you enhance strategically, you may have to maximize micro-iteravely. We will actualize the buzzword "reality-based". What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? We will step up our power to evolve without reducing our capability to productize. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? Kolo practically invented the term "value-added branding". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, front-end, frictionless cyber-micro-Total Quality Control are forced to become revolutionary. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our reporting but our capability to incubate. We will brand the buzzword "seamless". We will architect the term "virtual". We will morph the jargon-based term "user-centric". We think that most value-added web sites use far too much J++, and not enough J++. We have come to know that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also transform globally. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "reality-based" really mean?