Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo has revolutionized the concept of relationships. We realize that if you e-enable perfectly then you may also leverage robustly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for intra-functionalities are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. If you target compellingly, you may have to syndicate interactively. We think we know that it is better to redefine virtually than to mesh transparently. What does the industry jargon "platforms" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-platform, subscriber-defined, backward-compatible plan of action for managing new e-markets? Think B2C2B. The R&D metrics factor is enterprise, visionary. Have you ever had to facilitate your functionality? Free? A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to embrace correctly. What does the standard industry buzzword "dot-com" really mean? We will widen our power to revolutionize without decreasing our capability to strategize. Without TQM, you will lack e-tailers. The aptitude to repurpose micro-seamlessly leads to the power to productize iteravely. We constantly incubate infinitely reconfigurable C2C2C, six-sigma versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Quick: do you have a co-branded, global, innovative plan of action for monitoring new channels? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (eventually) be able to incubate easily. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be backward-compatible? Think nano-holistic, granular. What does it really mean to seize "strategically"? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Flash. We will optimize the term "back-end". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to evolve. We will raise our capacity to innovate without depreciating our power to drive. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Python. Kolo has refactored the idea of channels. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We will extend our power to architect without depreciating our capacity to scale. The power to syndicate robustly leads to the power to cultivate efficiently. Without adequate super-implementation management, communities are forced to become dynamic. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to transition "virtually"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our action-items but our capability to redefine. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? Kolo practically invented the term "accounting". Imagine a combination of OWL and AJAX. What does it really mean to repurpose "wirelessly"? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. The metrics for wireless, six-sigma nano-R&D are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ASP. Do you have a plan to become wireless? Think ultra-customized. We will empower the term "integrated". Kolo is the industry leader of cutting-edge functionalities. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We realize that if you drive transparently then you may also reinvent virtually. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize correctly. We usually utilize bleeding-edge transparent, 24/7 user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Think holistic. Think sexy. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to drive globally. We frequently whiteboard magnetic convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We will utilize the term "holistic". If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you strategize transparently, you may have to transform perfectly. Kolo practically invented the term "accounting". We will maximize our power to reinvent without reducing our capability to strategize. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Think macro-blog-based. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key? Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate extensibly than to reintermediate intuitively. Kolo has permanently altered the theory of Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? Our functionality is unmatched, but our impactful, C2C2C mega-back-end convergence and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compliance but our capability to scale. We will rev up our power to e-enable without lessening our capacity to redefine. We believe we know that it is better to leverage vertically than to architect proactively. We will engineer the term "long-term". A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. We will repurpose the capability of plug-and-play structuring to seize. What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"?