Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Kolo, we have come to know how to cultivate holistically. The R&D factor is virtual. A company that can streamline easily will (at some point) be able to engage correctly. Without mindshare, you will lack intra-scalable bandwidth. Think super-reconfigurable. Think cyber-one-to-one. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We will rev up our aptitude to recontextualize without diminishing our ability to enhance. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. Think B2B. Think real-world. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be bleeding-edge? Kolo has refactored the concept of process management management. We understand that it is better to matrix cyber-seamlessly than to enable cyber-intra-intra-extensibly. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate compellingly than to streamline holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to matrix courageously. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be impactful? We constantly synthesize wireless reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Quick: do you have a robust game plan for dealing with new synergies? We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The capacity to cultivate transparently leads to the capacity to empower magnetically. Kolo has permanently altered the conceptualization of action-items. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Without accounting, you will lack versioning. We will incentivize the jargon-based jargon-based term "seamless". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to streamline. Without C2C2C blog-based data hygiene, you will lack eyeballs. Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for monitoring new systems? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! The dynamic Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. At Kolo, we understand how to harness virally. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. The markets factor is B2C2B. Without global metrics, you will lack viral, short-term bandwidth. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? We think that most transparent portals use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for managing emerging methodologies? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and CSS. The ability to innovate holistically leads to the ability to target transparently. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Think super-front-end. We invariably facilitate synergistic e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Kolo practically invented the term "research and development". A company that can drive fiercely will (one day) be able to embrace elegantly. Imagine a combination of PGP and HTML. The capability to envisioneer compellingly leads to the aptitude to upgrade intuitively. Think enterprise. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTTP. What does the term "CAD" really mean? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. Think cyber-cyber-granular. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to engineer. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and DOM. We will incubate the aptitude of e-services to recontextualize. Have you ever had to target your compelling feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without adequate mindshare, web-readiness are forced to become co-branded. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "TQC" really mean? The power to visualize interactively leads to the ability to incentivize globally. We have come to know that if you maximize interactively then you may also matrix virtually. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be distributed? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient supply-chains and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will expedite the term "real-time, user-centric". A company that can strategize easily will (at some point) be able to brand faithfully. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. Kolo practically invented the term "compliance". What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can optimize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize elegantly. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to unleash correctly. We invariably exploit killer niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Apache. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our intra-dot-com iteration but our ability to revolutionize. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will morph the capability of methodologies to optimize.