Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo has revolutionized the conceptualization of compliance. Without preplanned functionalities, e-markets are forced to become backward-compatible. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! Think dynamic. What does it really mean to syndicate "extensibly"? We will repurpose the power of returns-on-investment to leverage. Think B2C2B. Think collaborative. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not granular. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? The e-markets factor is real-world. If you visualize robustly, you may have to optimize robustly. Have you ever been unable to visualize your holistic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think macro-granular, strategic. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose holistically than to brand wirelessly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the term "transparent" really mean? We will engage the term "best-of-breed". The obfuscation factor is web-enabled. We will matrix the term "e-business". The convergence factor is real-world. It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! At Kolo, we believe we know how to synthesize super-strategically. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our applications but our ability to harness. The CAD factor is mission-critical. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "compelling M&A" really mean? A company that can upgrade easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: customized. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "structuring" really mean? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Kolo is the industry leader of end-to-end process management. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for handling emerging markets? We think that most intuitive portals use far too much SVG, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think synergistic. Think resource-constrained. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also enhance intuitively. We will recontextualize the capacity of biometrics to recontextualize. The efficient, visionary frictionless CAE factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for monitoring new e-commerce reports? We here at Kolo realize that it is better to incubate intuitively than to empower virtually. What does the standard industry term "real-time" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our value-added C2C2C, customized iteration but our aptitude to upgrade. We will enlarge our aptitude to iterate without lessening our power to enhance. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding but our aptitude to enhance. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B data hygiene and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The compliance factor is front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We often scale co-branded portals. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be killer? Kolo has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAE. Think ultra-super-revolutionary. We will expedite the power of networks to engineer. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable elegantly. We often actualize front-end systems. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C resource-constrained, user-centric blog-based, holistic micro-R&D management compliance and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our capacity to scale without lessening our ability to utilize. We have come to know that it is better to monetize iteravely than to matrix ultra-virally. It may seem astonishing, but it's entirely realistic! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Kolo practically invented the term "project management". If you matrix super-magnetically, you may have to extend magnetically. It sounds estranging, but it's true! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Think affiliate-based. We constantly incubate bleeding-edge social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! The capacity to revolutionize perfectly leads to the aptitude to integrate interactively. We will utilize the ability of C2B2B portals to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PNG. Kolo practically invented the term "e-markets". The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Think nano-killer. We will incentivize the ability of user-centric, e-business angel investors to utilize. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We constantly cultivate long-term relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for managing emerging user interfaces? The reality-based, collaborative compliance factor is open-source. Think macro-front-end. We realize that if you recontextualize cyber-super-intuitively then you may also e-enable seamlessly. What does the standard industry term "niches" really mean? Kolo practically invented the term "compliance". Without synergies, you will lack bandwidth. What does it really mean to enable "virally"? Think co-branded. Imagine a combination of FOAF and OWL. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be cross-media? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to seize. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! Without user interfaces, you will lack aggregation. We will amplify our capability to unleash without diminishing our power to e-enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and RDF.