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Andrew Davidson.
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Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Company Name: 

Your Randomly-Generated Corporate Gibberish:


If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is!
Kolo is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 communities. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bloatware but our power to streamline. We invariably engage blog-based granular e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Without sufficient 24/7/365 M&A, Total Quality Management reports are forced to become fractal. We think that most compelling portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. Think dot-com. Think turn-key. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We always enable sexy paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will scale the term "virtual". We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough SVG.
We will multiply our capacity to facilitate without decrementing our ability to generate.
At Kolo, we realize how to iterate holistically. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We will enable the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "fractal". We will multiply our ability to productize without diminishing our capability to streamline. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's completely true! We frequently envisioneer impactful R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! If you integrate robustly, you may have to generate virtually. We always morph backward-compatible visionary CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
We will enlarge our capacity to seize without decreasing our capacity to orchestrate.
Kolo is the industry leader of affiliate-based C2C2C performance management. We realize that if you transform efficiently then you may also utilize compellingly. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Without development, you will lack compliance. We will facilitate the industry jargon "24/7/365". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "R&D" really mean? The eyeballs factor is global. We will innovate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "real-world". Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be dynamic? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not seamless.
Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B?
Kolo practically invented the term "synergies". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our implementation metrics but our ability to envisioneer. We realize that it is better to leverage dynamically than to matrix proactively. The aptitude to syndicate cyber-mega-globally leads to the power to scale intuitively. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough SMIL. Without sufficient experiences, niches are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for dealing with new experiences? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!
We think we know that if you scale strategically then you may also streamline extensibly.
At Kolo, we have come to know how to repurpose strategically. Think short-term. Think 24/7. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably implement real-time CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! It seems stunning, but it's realistic! We will utilize the power of metrics to embrace. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be e-business? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be next-generation? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be efficient? Think global. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end subscriber communities and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement.
What does it really mean to expedite "globally"?
Kolo has refactored the concept of reporting. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! Our functionality is second to none, but our extensible ROI metrics and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient paradigms, biometrics are forced to become C2C2C, world-class. The research and development management factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to whiteboard holistically. What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? We realize that if you mesh robustly then you may also evolve robustly. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be co-branded? We have come to know that if you mesh transparently then you may also brand mega-efficiently. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Think ubiquitous.
Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for monitoring new architectures?
At Kolo, we have come to know how to transition macro-extensibly. What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? It sounds perplexing, but it's 100% 100% 100% realistic! We constantly engage virtual end-to-end, customized data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think back-end. Think B2B2C. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think sticky. Think scalable. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. We always facilitate efficient virtual M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will implement the jargon-based term "mission-critical". We will revolutionize the aptitude of power shifts to optimize. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing.
If you syndicate perfectly, you may have to synthesize proactively.
We here at Kolo have come to know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to engage transparently. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you deploy virally, you may have to repurpose magnetically. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We believe we know that it is better to engineer perfectly than to grow globally. Without appropriate systems, deliverables are forced to become ubiquitous, killer. What does the term "sexy, robust re-sizing" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! The ability to synergize ultra-strategically leads to the capability to reintermediate interactively.
If you productize virtually, you may have to embrace nano-interactively.
Kolo practically invented the term "leading-edge, 24/7/365 research and development". The ROI metrics factor is web-enabled. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will repurpose the capacity of user communities to syndicate. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to streamline. What does the commonly-used term "global" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Java. Without preplanned affiliate-based, mission-critical TQM, granular user interfaces are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Without preplanned communities, methodologies are forced to become virally-distributed. Without well-chosen methodologies, applications are forced to become customer-directed. We will engineer the standard industry term "extensible". What does the term "C2B2B R&D" really mean? We think we know that if you cultivate iteravely then you may also e-enable intra-globally.

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