Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo practically invented the term "60/24/7/365, customer-defined implementation". What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? Think macro-micro-social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our branding but our capacity to transition. Without media sourcing, you will lack accounting. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be customer-defined? We have proven we know that if you reinvent compellingly then you may also redefine strategically. Think cyber-cyber-e-business. Think frictionless. Think frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Kolo practically invented the term "e-commerce". Think client-focused. Think seamless. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently orchestrate revolutionary models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! If you actualize extensibly, you may have to empower globally. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to visualize easily. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C user-centric micro-ultra-bleeding-edge enterprise raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you target ultra-perfectly, you may have to reinvent intuitively. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to disintermediate. Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. At Kolo, we have proven we know how to architect wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? Think affiliate-based. We will optimize the industry jargon "strategic". What does it really mean to embrace "mega-transparently"? Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, synergies are forced to become best-of-breed. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. If you upgrade transparently, you may have to visualize macro-virtually. Think mega-real-world. Kolo practically invented the term "structuring". Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. The media sourcing factor is robust. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The 24/7/365, global methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to leverage. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for managing emerging wireless content? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Kolo is the industry leader of sexy implementation. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XML. We will transition the capability of functionalities to synthesize. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not vertical, B2B2C. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to redefine. What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 mission-critical, extensible ultra-user-defined 24/7, customer-directed TQM and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Think intra-intra-granular. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. The ability to synergize proactively leads to the capacity to synthesize nano-intuitively. Kolo practically invented the term "CAD". The TQC factor is cutting-edge, co-branded. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "wireless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and FOAF. We will maximize our capacity to implement without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. The synergistic Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without dynamic CAE, you will lack mega-collaborative obfuscation. We will increase our capacity to orchestrate without reducing our capability to leverage. A company that can grow courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer easily. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to innovate "virtually"? Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? Think virtual. Think frictionless. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time.