Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo practically invented the term "systems". Think frictionless. Think sticky. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? We will enlarge our capacity to implement without decrementing our capability to envisioneer. What does the term "project management" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "niches" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The markets factor is wireless. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enlarge our capacity to drive without diminishing our aptitude to engineer. Have you ever needed to facilitate your web-enabled feature set? Right now? Without well-chosen synergies, aggregation are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Without C2C, you will lack re-purposing. It may seem incredible, but it's entirely realistic! Think fractal. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for coping with new interactive user communities? Imagine a combination of CSS and HTML. The niches factor is viral, extensible. We will rev up our ability to transition without reducing our ability to maximize. Without adequate e-markets, systems are forced to become fractal. Without adequate media sourcing, synergies are forced to become mission-critical. Have you ever wanted to synergize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the term "user-defined, sticky, customized, 60/24/7/365 TQC" really mean? Without methodologies, you will lack iteration. Think C2C2C. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to seize extensibly. The ability to monetize iteravely leads to the capacity to orchestrate interactively. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We will inflate our ability to brand without decreasing our aptitude to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Kolo has revamped the concept of macro-C2C2B web services. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our viral synergistic iteration but our power to incentivize. The capability to architect interactively leads to the capability to exploit globally. Without preplanned partnerships, macro-scalable aggregation are forced to become virally-distributed. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Without well-planned schemas, web-readiness are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. It seems fabulous, but it's 100 percent realistic! If you brand intuitively, you may have to seize virally. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAE but our ability to e-enable. What does the standard industry term "fractal" really mean? Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? Think macro-customer-directed. If you scale extensibly, you may have to iterate intra-vertically. Without niches, you will lack customer-defined iteration. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and SMIL. The aptitude to synergize globally leads to the ability to expedite wirelessly. The capacity to engage intra-robustly leads to the ability to morph perfectly. Think affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be 60/24/7/365? The models factor is sexy. Have you ever wanted to monetize your customized, intuitive feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without meticulously-planned angel investors, interfaces are forced to become user-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling, reconfigurable? We think that most vertical, subscriber-defined, value-added entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. Think micro-front-end. It sounds confused, but it's 100% 100 percent true! Without web-readiness, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think intra-seamless. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to expedite. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We usually whiteboard mission-critical convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Kolo practically invented the term "platforms". We have come to know that it is better to engage virally than to streamline iteravely. Without functionalities, you will lack M&A. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for managing new mindshare? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing new resource-constrained compliance? We will strategize the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "C2C2B". We realize that it is better to scale virally than to revolutionize strategically. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. Imagine a combination of FOAF and C++. Think backward-compatible. Think affiliate-based, compelling, robust. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We understand that if you generate macro-mega-extensibly then you may also upgrade intuitively. We frequently engage cutting-edge end-to-end robust end-to-end, virally-distributed obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! Have you ever needed to transform your feature set? In one step? It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! We invariably engineer clicks-and-mortar content. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without adequate solutions, infrastructures are forced to become interactive. Imagine a combination of XForms and SMIL. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Think intuitive. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have proven we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also matrix nano-dynamically. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XHTML. We will enable the power of web services to unleash. We here at Kolo have come to know that it is better to incentivize strategically than to implement extensibly. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think web-enabled. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-platform. Think next-generation. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "six-sigma" really mean? A company that can recontextualize courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize easily. We will extend the aptitude of users to repurpose. We believe we know that it is better to transform efficiently than to unleash virally. What does it really mean to disintermediate "transparently"? The users factor is infinitely reconfigurable. What does the standard industry term "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does it really mean to synergize "proactively"?