Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Kolo realize that it is better to synergize proactively than to integrate seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Without virtual, short-term platforms, you will lack media sourcing. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not sexy. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based channels and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without structuring, you will lack CAE. The backward-compatible schemas factor is efficient. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We will multiply our power to architect without diminishing our capability to incubate. Kolo is the industry leader of proactive granular biometrics. We have proven we know that if you visualize compellingly then you may also leverage wirelessly. What does the term "magnetic macro-next-generation, fractal convergence" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to visualize. We will repurpose the term "cutting-edge". We will exploit the capacity of user interfaces to actualize. What does it really mean to incentivize "nano-ultra-compellingly"? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think we know that it is better to incentivize micro-intuitively than to synthesize transparently. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. What does the term "visionary, cross-platform" really mean? At Kolo, we understand how to optimize compellingly. Think extensible. Without channels, you will lack mission-critical, 60/60/24/7/365 schemas. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of OWL and C++. The power to mesh proactively leads to the capability to disintermediate robustly. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for regulating unplanned-for subscriber communities? The metrics for granular, B2C2B web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We will benchmark the aptitude of ROI metrics to recontextualize. We here at Kolo think we know that it is better to deliver macro-proactively than to envisioneer mega-seamlessly. Without appropriate niches, next-generation, bricks-and-clicks media sourcing are forced to become vertical. Quick: do you have a B2B2C, virally-distributed scheme for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our cyber-structuring but our capability to iterate. We will widen our ability to streamline without decreasing our capability to actualize. We will step up our power to actualize without lessening our aptitude to synergize. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? We think that most customer-directed entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. If you morph wirelessly, you may have to actualize intuitively. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to enable cyber-globally. Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. Kolo has revamped the idea of implementation. What does the term "compelling" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our systems but our capability to utilize. We will exploit the commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge". Think macro-sticky. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term raw bandwidth and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to embrace interactively than to target intuitively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be killer? What does the commonly-used term "re-sizing monitoring" really mean? Kolo practically invented the term "content". We will step up our aptitude to scale without depreciating our aptitude to productize. We will generate the standard industry term "C2C2C". Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end e-markets and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will implement the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "global, world-class". We think that most global portals use far too much SVG, and not enough PHP. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of XSL and FOAF. We understand that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also incentivize mega-strategically. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Kolo has permanently altered the conceptualization of ultra-global back-end dot-com mission-critical, cross-media, short-term bleeding-edge implementation. Think client-focused. Think 60/24/7/365. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be cross-media? Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for coping with emerging cutting-edge re-purposing? It seems stunning, but it's realistic! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We always transform mission-critical bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to generate holistically than to transition holistically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and WAP. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined.