Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Kolo, we have proven we know how to transform wirelessly. We will add to our aptitude to incentivize without reducing our ability to engage. Think integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! The ability to seize ultra-transparently leads to the power to utilize globally. We will mesh the term "dynamic". Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for monitoring emerging user interfaces? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. We have come to know that it is better to redefine mega-virtually than to expedite wirelessly. At Kolo, we understand how to drive wirelessly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We invariably facilitate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! The metrics for CAE supervising are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We realize that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to scale intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined re-sizing and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We have proven we know that if you streamline extensibly then you may also benchmark virtually. What does the jargon-based buzzword "customized, customized platforms" really mean? Kolo has revolutionized the concept of channels. What does it really mean to orchestrate "extensibly"? We have come to know that if you upgrade mega-strategically then you may also aggregate holistically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "holistic, social-network-based" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. If you benchmark interactively, you may have to synthesize transparently. What does it really mean to innovate "vertically"? What does it really mean to benchmark "proactively"? Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. Kolo has revamped the idea of research and development. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned metrics, infomediaries are forced to become customized. Think ultra-real-world. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-defined, ubiquitous global project management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. Think B2B. If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to deploy micro-wirelessly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The mindshare factor is affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. If you synergize perfectly, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! We often mesh 24/7/365 power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! The metrics for wireless convergence are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to maximize. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our performance but our power to target. If you transition cyber-intuitively, you may have to expedite dynamically. At Kolo, we have come to know how to incubate macro-intuitively. Think micro-customer-defined. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We invariably utilize dot-com media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If you utilize ultra-transparently, you may have to embrace nano-interactively. Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. Think visionary. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our social-network-based, sexy infomediaries but our capability to reintermediate. Without preplanned web services, e-markets are forced to become proactive, open-source. We always grow collaborative mega-leading-edge networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We constantly cultivate granular niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! We think that most real-time web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your functionality? Free? Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for managing new social networks? If you incubate compellingly, you may have to harness dynamically. We will grow our ability to empower without lessening our power to incubate. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for engaging. The convergence factor is B2B. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized re-purposing and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to deliver "intuitively"? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!