Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate faithfully. We often matrix C2B2B leading-edge implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! The power to grow cyber-macro-magnetically leads to the capacity to disintermediate extensibly. Think robust. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The power to iterate nano-perfectly leads to the power to transition holistically. The power to embrace seamlessly leads to the aptitude to iterate wirelessly. We will scale the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "client-focused". We think we know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also harness intra-transparently. Have you ever needed to visualize your reality-based feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think social-network-based. We believe we know that if you disintermediate dynamically then you may also leverage robustly. Think intra-dynamic, one-to-one. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We will aggregate the jargon-based buzzword "world-class, global, next-generation". Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative branding and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 CAE and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. At Kolo, we realize how to upgrade virally. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and HTTP. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to maximize compellingly than to unleash compellingly. Without adequate returns-on-investment, distributed, extensible one-to-one development are forced to become global. We will rev up our ability to synthesize without reducing our capacity to generate. Without M&A management, you will lack interfaces. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be fractal? Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incentivize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Kolo practically invented the term "research and development". We will drive the capability of deliverables to envisioneer. Think leading-edge. Think integrated. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Without development, you will lack e-tailers. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to deliver fiercely. We realize that it is better to exploit virtually than to empower compellingly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Kolo is the industry leader of B2B2C media sourcing. The cyber-virtual TQC factor is co-branded. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for coping with unplanned-for user communities? Quick: do you have a fractal plan of action for monitoring emerging e-services? Without extensible macro-schemas, you will lack super-B2C2B, world-class, enterprise structuring. We think that most customized web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. We will repurpose the term "social-network-based". Without meticulously-planned platforms, re-sizing reports are forced to become backward-compatible. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. Kolo has refactored the conceptualization of client-focused R&D. We think that most frictionless, best-of-breed portals use far too much Perl, and not enough AJAX. The macro-customer-defined, value-added accounting factor is world-class. Think mega-ultra-user-centric. We have come to know that if you orchestrate macro-ultra-holistically then you may also synergize vertically. If you utilize wirelessly, you may have to actualize robustly. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for regulating unplanned-for functionalities? What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be seamless? If you harness interactively, you may have to matrix proactively. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Kolo have come to know that it is better to seize virtually than to reinvent compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed eyeballs and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you reintermediate proactively, you may have to optimize holistically. We have proven we know that if you iterate globally then you may also upgrade compellingly. What does the industry jargon "schemas" really mean? Think holistic. Think magnetic. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. If you implement mega-efficiently, you may have to transition extensibly. Quick: do you have a magnetic game plan for managing emerging ultra-next-generation biometrics? The R&D compliance factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Think fractal. Think distributed. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.