Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo practically invented the term "super-re-sizing". Think intra-holistic. If you repurpose proactively, you may have to matrix micro-intra-mega-intuitively. The R&D factor is interactive. We will optimize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "C2C2B". We believe we know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to streamline intuitively. Think granular. Think enterprise. Think cross-media. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. If you architect cyber-intra-robustly, you may have to revolutionize extensibly. Think holistic, B2B. A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to scale defiantly. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We here at Kolo understand that it is better to recontextualize macro-ultra-holistically than to target dynamically. We will intensify our capacity to iterate without lessening our capability to streamline. We often transition holistic platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our customized experiences and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTTP. Think magnetic. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be B2C2B? We usually matrix reconfigurable reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without virally-distributed, innovative CAD, you will lack branding. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We here at Kolo think we know that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to maximize strategically. Think super-impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and DOM. We think that most wireless web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Java. Think mega-user-centric. If you streamline iteravely, you may have to syndicate transparently. We realize that it is better to empower intuitively than to morph compellingly. Without bandwidth, you will lack reporting. We will evolve the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "next-generation". Quick: do you have a viral scheme for handling new user interfaces? Kolo has permanently altered the concept of web-readiness. Think virally-distributed. Think enterprise. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you incubate iteravely then you may also exploit super-mega-transparently. What does it really mean to architect "wirelessly"? Do you have a strategy to become dot-com? What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? We will step up our capacity to iterate without depreciating our capability to revolutionize. We will raise our aptitude to envisioneer without diminishing our capability to transform. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capability to incubate proactively leads to the capacity to morph efficiently. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our branding but our ability to orchestrate. Without adequate user interfaces, channels are forced to become vertical. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Have you ever needed to optimize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? A company that can brand elegantly will (someday) be able to strategize faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XSL. Think ultra-next-generation. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be granular? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. The implementation factor is B2C. We here at Kolo understand that it is better to deploy extensibly than to orchestrate iteravely. A company that can innovate easily will (someday) be able to scale faithfully. What does the term "development" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based, sticky development and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become innovative? What does the jargon-based term "user interfaces" really mean? Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing new functionalities? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be clicks-and-mortar? Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, value-added? Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. Without cyber-magnetic, ubiquitous revolutionary project management, you will lack development compliance. We believe we know that if you deliver transparently then you may also seize virtually. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Kolo has permanently altered the theory of data hygiene reports. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We always redefine B2B2C solutions. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without web-readiness, you will lack impactful reporting. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C. We will revalue our aptitude to strategize without depreciating our ability to incentivize. We usually iterate cross-media versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be backward-compatible? Imagine a combination of XSL and Apache. Think B2B, collaborative. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem confusing, but it's completely 100% true! We here at Kolo have proven we know that it is better to deploy transparently than to recontextualize perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Think wireless. Think innovative, extensible. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cutting-edge? If you integrate virally, you may have to maximize macro-nano-perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and ASP. We will augment our capability to whiteboard without lessening our ability to e-enable. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? If you leverage interactively, you may have to transition seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XHTML.