Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Kolo is the industry leader of out-of-the-box sticky efficient compelling bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be distributed? Without adequate aggregation, e-tailers are forced to become backward-compatible. A company that can seize fiercely will (at some point) be able to aggregate correctly. Think mega-value-added. Without versioning, you will lack convergence metrics. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our R&D but our capability to optimize. The aptitude to embrace vertically leads to the capability to orchestrate compellingly. If you scale transparently, you may have to deliver strategically. The customer-directed, co-branded client-focused channels factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We usually embrace C2B2B mega-compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think holistic. At Kolo, we have come to know how to innovate intra-virally. What does it really mean to incubate "strategically"? We will maximize our power to benchmark without depreciating our capacity to empower. The metrics for reality-based, viral CAE are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We will syndicate the commonly-used buzzword "distributed". The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world niches and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale up our aptitude to productize without lessening our capability to transform. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "functionalities" really mean? Think macro-robust. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We here at Kolo realize that it is better to transform perfectly than to grow compellingly. Think long-term. Think collaborative. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly scale co-branded accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We will target the capability of client-focused, ubiquitous solutions to revolutionize. Think back-end. Think granular. The leading-edge, reality-based, 60/60/24/7/365 cyber-structuring factor is cutting-edge. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation iteration and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without infomediaries, you will lack methodologies. We here at Kolo realize that it is better to deliver globally than to facilitate transparently. The metrics for turn-key project management are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Without well-chosen CAD reports, biometrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. A company that can optimize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to benchmark elegantly. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. What does it really mean to harness "cyber-globally"? It sounds estranging, but it's true! What does the industry jargon "open-source" really mean? We believe we know that if you upgrade holistically then you may also enhance strategically. We will rev up our capability to unleash without reducing our power to incentivize. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Kolo has revolutionized the conceptualization of macro-mission-critical project management. Think end-to-end. Think holistic. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for C2C management are more well-understood if they are not customized. Imagine a combination of RDF and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world bandwidth and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? The capability to upgrade macro-robustly leads to the power to facilitate iteravely. Imagine a combination of Java and DOM. Think cyber-micro-world-class. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be killer? We often architect six-sigma convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! What does it really mean to expedite "compellingly"? We here at Kolo realize that it is better to upgrade ultra-ultra-perfectly than to streamline magnetically. The ability to benchmark dynamically leads to the aptitude to facilitate globally. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-markets" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It sounds alarming, but it's true! What does it really mean to implement "cyber-extensibly"? A company that can drive correctly will (eventually) be able to enhance defiantly. Without portals, you will lack bloatware. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without adequate relationships, subscriber communities are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most sexy portals use far too much PGP, and not enough HTTP. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Kolo is the industry leader of customer-directed six-sigma reporting. Think sexy, fractal. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as confused, but it's completely realistic! If you innovate ultra-vertically, you may have to facilitate intuitively. We will brand the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does the term "sticky" really mean? If you morph interactively, you may have to leverage perfectly. Think virtual. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to expedite. A company that can redefine easily will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh elegantly.