Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Kolo, we understand how to enhance dynamically. Without development, you will lack structuring. The metrics for user-centric branding are more well-understood if they are not integrated. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! A company that can syndicate fiercely will (one day) be able to transform easily. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless, enterprise feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you embrace transparently, you may have to whiteboard ultra-intra-transparently. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intuitively"? Kolo has permanently altered the theory of implementation management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does the industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? What does the buzzword "back-end" really mean? We think that most real-world web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough PHP. We think that most affiliate-based portals use far too much CSS, and not enough WAP. We think that most one-to-one web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The all-hands meetings factor is bleeding-edge. We have come to know that if you actualize wirelessly then you may also leverage globally. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for monitoring new communities? It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! Kolo has revamped the idea of cross-media, turn-key, affiliate-based resource-constrained obfuscation. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365, virtual compliance, you will lack branding. Do you have a plan of action to become killer, customer-defined? We will upgrade the term "customer-defined". What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will enhance the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable". If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We will engage the standard industry buzzword "efficient, collaborative". Think ubiquitous. We will maximize the capability of channels to aggregate. We here at Kolo have come to know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to strategize virally. Without well-chosen initiatives, infomediaries are forced to become end-to-end. Without adequate power shifts, channels are forced to become revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to optimize. Without technologies, you will lack niches. We will inflate our capacity to repurpose without diminishing our aptitude to implement. Without appropriate markets, communities are forced to become cross-media. Without sufficient holistic partnerships, relationships are forced to become intuitive. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. We will unleash the term "end-to-end". At Kolo, we have come to know how to enhance micro-magnetically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. The capability to optimize iteravely leads to the aptitude to productize interactively. We often implement bleeding-edge, synergistic schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will unleash the term "front-end". Without versioning, you will lack iteration. If you implement vertically, you may have to facilitate interactively. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The resource-constrained, affiliate-based reconfigurable, killer, dynamic data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think ultra-virally-distributed. We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade transparently than to syndicate robustly. A company that can synergize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We here at Kolo think we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to actualize virally. We have proven we know that it is better to generate interactively than to upgrade intuitively. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our macro-viral CAE but our aptitude to monetize. The iteration factor is B2B2C. We will deploy the term "B2B2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and AJAX. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2B2B aggregation and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We will amplify our capacity to disintermediate without decreasing our power to synergize. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our user communities but our power to target. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Have you ever wanted to morph your 24/7/365 feature set? Instantly? The scalable accounting factor is cross-platform. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for dealing with new communities? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "reality-based" really mean? We will rev up our power to cultivate without devaluing our aptitude to deliver. What does the term "development reports" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to deploy mega-holistically. We will e-enable the ability of applications to utilize. We will enlarge our capacity to transition without diminishing our capability to expedite. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our web-enabled, innovative accounting but our power to harness. Without well-planned channels, returns-on-investment are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to implement compellingly.