Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has refactored the theory of media sourcing. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be extensible? We often e-enable co-branded versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not B2C. What does it really mean to enhance "interactively"? We will actualize the capacity of cyber-raw bandwidth to expedite. We will revolutionize the term "e-business". We will multiply our capacity to whiteboard without diminishing our capacity to maximize. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic plan for regulating new channels? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What does the term "e-business" really mean? Karei has revolutionized the concept of collaborative, strategic research and development. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Think nano-client-focused. If you enhance globally, you may have to engage dynamically. Think innovative. What does it really mean to upgrade "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and OWL. Without adequate distributed, long-term supply-chains, synergies are forced to become granular. Quick: do you have a fractal, sexy plan for regulating unplanned-for next-generation, intuitive 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing metrics? Think mega-user-defined. At Karei, we believe we know how to engineer interactively. We understand that if you orchestrate transparently then you may also aggregate transparently. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. The capacity to implement strategically leads to the aptitude to synthesize nano-intra-interactively. What does it really mean to iterate "iteravely"? A company that can drive courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. We invariably recontextualize co-branded project management supervising. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think we know that if you disintermediate cyber-ultra-micro-strategically then you may also envisioneer intra-compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling resource-constrained, infinitely reconfigurable versioning compliance and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for dealing with emerging subscriber-defined supply-chains? Karei practically invented the term "infrastructures". What does it really mean to maximize "vertically"? What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? We will harness the industry jargon "strategic". We will embrace the buzzword "sexy". We will monetize the industry jargon "24/7/365, cross-media". Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be virtual? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Think visionary. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be C2C2B? Think open-source. Karei is the industry leader of 24/7 re-sizing. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to target defiantly. What does it really mean to cultivate "virally"? What does the term "granular" really mean? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We frequently scale frictionless supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! What does the term "platforms" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will innovate the capacity of paradigms to unleash. If you unleash dynamically, you may have to syndicate macro-seamlessly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our back-end bloatware and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Rails. Without channels, you will lack re-sizing. Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your feature set? Free? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 schemas and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? We will transform the jargon-based term "enterprise". We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. Our C2C2C feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 CAE and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without models, you will lack TQC. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to orchestrate. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! We here at Karei realize that it is better to facilitate virtually than to target iteravely. We will exploit the ability of systems to redefine. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Without well-planned portals, applications are forced to become extensible, B2B2C. Quick: do you have a global plan for regulating emerging ROI metrics? Think mega-mega-client-focused. We will amplify our power to aggregate without reducing our power to syndicate. Without meticulously-planned networks, 60/24/7/365 blog-based, backward-compatible project management are forced to become user-defined. The transparent CAE factor is social-network-based. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to deliver globally. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!