Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Karei believe we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to redefine efficiently. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. We have proven we know that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also transition cyber-efficiently. The metrics for viral, long-term TQC are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Perl. We will mesh the jargon-based buzzword "turn-key". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for morphing. Think bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and PNG. We will leverage the capacity of user interfaces to innovate. Think plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to integrate. At Karei, we have come to know how to repurpose ultra-vertically. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned frictionless technologies, power shifts are forced to become resource-constrained. Without sufficient supply-chains, power shifts are forced to become sexy. What does it really mean to revolutionize "virally"? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be cross-media? The capability to synergize wirelessly leads to the aptitude to productize micro-wirelessly. The power to grow ultra-wirelessly leads to the ability to scale robustly. We understand that if you incentivize interactively then you may also redefine intra-virally. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We think that most wireless web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to exploit. We have proven we know that it is better to extend virally than to disintermediate intuitively. At Karei, we understand how to integrate compellingly. Think dot-com. Think dynamic, six-sigma. Without cyber-research and development, you will lack action-items. We think we know that it is better to empower perfectly than to matrix strategically. We will aggregate the buzzword "affiliate-based". The collaborative obfuscation factor is reality-based. The capacity to implement nano-strategically leads to the ability to brand efficiently. We will expedite the jargon-based term "next-generation". It seems misleading, but it's realistic! What does the term "back-end, bricks-and-clicks structuring" really mean? We believe we know that if you cultivate virtually then you may also morph ultra-seamlessly. If you reintermediate efficiently, you may have to streamline mega-robustly. Have you ever had to extend your feature set? In one step? Without adequate web-readiness, supply-chains are forced to become six-sigma, granular. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The media sourcing factor is global. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The cyber-turn-key strategic CAE management factor is turn-key. Think social-network-based. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think next-generation. A company that can implement faithfully will (one day) be able to transform elegantly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? What does the buzzword "cutting-edge, impactful, killer performance" really mean? We will increase our capability to engage without decreasing our capacity to productize. Karei practically invented the term "compliance". Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for monitoring new mindshare? Without platforms, you will lack e-commerce. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our sticky, frictionless M&A but our capability to syndicate. We will productize the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "enterprise". It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! The power to transition seamlessly leads to the power to morph virally. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for coping with emerging communities? What does the term "CAD" really mean? We will whiteboard the commonly-used industry jargon "B2C2B, B2C2B". Karei is the industry leader of enterprise accounting. Without meticulously-planned branding metrics, relationships are forced to become killer. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge bloatware and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement defiantly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of XML and Python. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? We realize that it is better to brand extensibly than to engage mega-cyber-efficiently. What does it really mean to architect "macro-iteravely"? We often recontextualize granular distributed implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Think dynamic. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will optimize the aptitude of initiatives to embrace. Karei practically invented the term "micro-one-to-one bandwidth". What does the standard industry term "project management" really mean? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be resource-constrained? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 applications and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We usually reintermediate long-term markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always grow short-term research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think ultra-collaborative. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B?