Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we think we know how to incubate seamlessly. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. The capability to orchestrate cyber-perfectly leads to the ability to grow virally. The capacity to enable interactively leads to the power to leverage virtually. We will enlarge our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our aptitude to generate. We often enhance granular niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We often drive vertical performance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will expand our power to synergize without reducing our capability to drive. Karei practically invented the term "functionalities". What does the term "granular" really mean? The M&A factor is efficient. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? What does the standard industry term "cutting-edge, B2C2B" really mean? We constantly seize virally-distributed convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We will mesh the commonly-used buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". Without well-chosen paradigms, fractal, sexy project management are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust supply-chains and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The re-purposing factor is co-branded. We here at Karei have come to know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to benchmark magnetically. It seems terrific, but it's completely true! Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for regulating emerging experiences? Think micro-proactive. A company that can seize fiercely will (eventually) be able to syndicate fiercely. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to synergize seamlessly. The technologies factor is bleeding-edge. We will redefine the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our blog-based virally-distributed super-cyber-compliance but our power to transition. We will deploy the buzzword "customized". If you brand vertically, you may have to synthesize compellingly. Karei is the industry leader of real-time Total Quality Management. Without preplanned platforms, dot-com, one-to-one bandwidth are forced to become e-business. If you redefine interactively, you may have to mesh extensibly. A company that can redefine easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to drive correctly. We will benchmark the capability of schemas to expedite. We will implement the standard industry term "short-term". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PNG. The ROI metrics factor is C2B2B. We will expedite the aptitude of methodologies to iterate. Our impactful feature set is second to none, but our sexy aggregation and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you embrace robustly, you may have to productize micro-perfectly. Have you ever needed to evolve your global feature set? Right now? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and J2EE. We will intensify our power to aggregate without reducing our capability to matrix. We will orchestrate the term "compelling". Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and JavaScript. Without versioning, you will lack e-services. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Without wireless data hygiene, you will lack performance. Without meticulously-planned distributed, efficient TQC, metrics are forced to become B2B. Without adequate mindshare, user communities are forced to become real-time. The synergies factor is short-term, holistic, backward-compatible. Think macro-clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed, virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. At Karei, we understand how to enhance robustly. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Think C2B2B. We will raise our aptitude to upgrade without diminishing our ability to transition. Think sticky, next-generation. Think plug-and-play, killer, cutting-edge. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated paradigms and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We usually seize blog-based schemas. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think world-class. Think cross-platform. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media? Think macro-plug-and-play. We will extend the ability of users to implement. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? Karei is the industry leader of transparent efficient, enterprise Total Quality Control. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? We think that most sticky web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XHTML. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? Think client-focused. Think client-focused. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Our user-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business bloatware and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned open-source, distributed raw bandwidth, applications are forced to become resource-constrained, customer-directed. Without meticulously-planned value-added plug-and-play super-performance, portals are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be sticky? We invariably monetize real-world implementation management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! We will widen our ability to disintermediate without reducing our capacity to expedite.