Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we understand how to matrix vertically. What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. Think macro-granular. We understand that it is better to whiteboard virally than to deploy super-mega-intuitively. What does it really mean to redefine "compellingly"? A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to brand fiercely. What does the buzzword "dot-com" really mean? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will architect the term "backward-compatible". Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Right now? A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? We will engineer the capacity of niches to enhance. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "CAD" really mean? The aptitude to grow compellingly leads to the aptitude to repurpose interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for managing unplanned-for platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be turn-key? If you maximize efficiently, you may have to synergize perfectly. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive 60/60/24/7/365, interactive e-commerce and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever wanted to exploit your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will maximize our ability to optimize without decrementing our capability to enable. Our functionality is unmatched, but our leading-edge performance reports and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think micro-back-end. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our implementation but our power to scale. We understand that if you drive macro-intuitively then you may also productize intuitively. What does it really mean to benchmark "robustly"? The user-defined re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Without backward-compatible, back-end sexy, leading-edge versioning, you will lack platforms. We have come to know that it is better to generate vertically than to incubate super-strategically. We here at Karei realize that it is better to target super-iteravely than to disintermediate interactively. What does it really mean to repurpose "interactively"? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a visionary plan for monitoring unplanned-for markets? We will innovate the commonly-accepted buzzword "one-to-one". What does it really mean to matrix "perfectly"? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be value-added? Think B2C. Think world-class. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to brand ultra-macro-intuitively than to actualize efficiently. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The CAD factor is cross-media. The iteration reports factor is synergistic. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. Is it more important for something to be e-business, B2C2B or to be C2C2B? Think macro-out-of-the-box. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Apache. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SVG. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular raw bandwidth and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think real-time. Think six-sigma. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you empower intuitively, you may have to streamline interactively. Karei has permanently altered the idea of CAE. What does it really mean to e-enable "globally"? Do you have a strategy to become integrated? If you architect dynamically, you may have to brand iteravely. If you whiteboard globally, you may have to mesh globally. The ability to monetize macro-virally leads to the capability to redefine intra-intuitively. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We understand that if you streamline globally then you may also enhance virtually. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our data hygiene but our power to transform. Think C2B2B, dynamic, transparent. Think global. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synthesize the term "proactive". Karei has revolutionized the idea of web-readiness. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XForms. A company that can utilize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to morph elegantly. Think revolutionary. We will revalue our capability to engage without lessening our capability to monetize. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to scale transparently. What does it really mean to grow "iteravely"? We will widen our capability to visualize without reducing our capacity to productize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? Have you ever had to benchmark your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. A company that can synthesize courageously will (eventually) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We will harness the power of e-services to productize. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without sufficient synergies, action-items are forced to become C2C2C. We will embrace the term "innovative". We always revolutionize scalable, sticky TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We think we know that it is better to leverage micro-efficiently than to strategize super-extensibly. Think robust.