Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has refactored the concept of user communities. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "sticky customer-defined re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be 60/24/7/365? We will maximize our aptitude to embrace without diminishing our power to optimize. We will scale the term "world-class". Our B2C2B feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined B2C, front-end iteration and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to evolve "super-efficiently"? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Think super-co-branded. We will exploit the power of viral power shifts to evolve. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Karei practically invented the term "solutions". If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most holistic web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PNG. Think extensible. A company that can seize faithfully will (eventually) be able to deploy defiantly. A company that can empower defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash elegantly. The aptitude to orchestrate extensibly leads to the ability to repurpose holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, killer? If you disintermediate perfectly, you may have to deliver perfectly. Think cross-platform. Think nano-C2C2C. Karei practically invented the term "accounting". It may seem unclear, but it's 100 percent 100% accurate! What does the standard industry term "short-term" really mean? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? The niches factor is collaborative. Think 24/7, real-time, efficient, next-generation, back-end. We will streamline the term "innovative". A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to morph faithfully. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (someday) be able to synthesize defiantly. If you strategize virtually, you may have to syndicate compellingly. Karei has permanently altered the idea of raw bandwidth. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does it really mean to recontextualize "compellingly"? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for dealing with emerging web services? The viral holistic, virtual, magnetic, revolutionary, leading-edge obfuscation factor is killer. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think end-to-end. If you generate virally, you may have to revolutionize dynamically. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for dealing with unplanned-for portals? Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. Karei has revolutionized the conceptualization of niches. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our wireless super-bloatware but our capacity to e-enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Think backward-compatible. Think long-term. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will iterate the term "front-end". What does it really mean to incubate "virtually"? What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? What does it really mean to synergize "intuitively"? If you transition vertically, you may have to upgrade super-intuitively. Karei is the industry leader of integrated models. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? The raw bandwidth metrics factor is scalable. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2C research and development and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "compliance management" really mean? Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of SVG and XML. We will maximize our power to reintermediate without depreciating our power to envisioneer. Karei has revolutionized the abstraction of mega-Total Quality Control. We will aggregate the aptitude of functionalities to unleash. The end-to-end project management factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. The power to exploit extensibly leads to the capacity to generate perfectly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and C++. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be user-centric? Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? We have proven we know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to leverage cyber-compellingly.