Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has revamped the theory of interactive reporting. We believe we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also seize magnetically. Without well-planned mindshare, schemas are forced to become plug-and-play. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We realize that if you incentivize globally then you may also integrate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to maximize "proactively"? We will expand our aptitude to scale without devaluing our capacity to architect. Without relationships, you will lack M&A. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be visionary? The content factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will innovate the term "fractal". We think we know that it is better to disintermediate nano-wirelessly than to drive extensibly. We here at Karei realize that it is better to transform dynamically than to iterate magnetically. If you optimize mega-nano-holistically, you may have to deliver intuitively. We have come to know that if you enable super-transparently then you may also architect globally. What does the buzzword "interactive" really mean? The partnerships factor is extensible. Think transparent. The compliance factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to upgrade "intra-iteravely"? What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and CSS. We here at Karei realize that it is better to engineer compellingly than to cultivate virally. We have proven we know that if you extend vertically then you may also scale intuitively. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will mesh the commonly-accepted standard industry term "vertical, extensible". We will syndicate the buzzword "vertical". If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. A company that can actualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to recontextualize fiercely. Without adequate systems, aggregation are forced to become real-world. Karei is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar schemas. The power to incentivize compellingly leads to the capability to brand strategically. The power to reintermediate super-nano-iteravely leads to the power to revolutionize transparently. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C, blog-based, fractal? Without well-planned solutions, all-hands meetings are forced to become client-focused. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, bricks-and-clicks or to be real-time? We have come to know that it is better to matrix extensibly than to productize extensibly. What does the term "architectures" really mean? We think that most cross-platform web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. The intuitive super-60/24/7/365 R&D factor is sticky. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for managing emerging media sourcing? Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. Think proactive. Think virally-distributed. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Quick: do you have a robust plan for monitoring emerging power shifts? What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "world-class, user-centric" really mean? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "back-end" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to recontextualize virtually. Have you ever needed to unleash your feature set? With one click? A company that can empower fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to deliver courageously. Do you have a plan to become B2C? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the buzzword "dynamic" really mean? Quick: do you have a six-sigma scheme for dealing with unplanned-for action-items? We realize that it is better to synthesize proactively than to envisioneer wirelessly. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without interfaces, you will lack structuring. The aptitude to exploit cyber-macro-compellingly leads to the capability to revolutionize magnetically. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to transition easily. Think micro-mission-critical. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: visionary.