Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei is the industry leader of scalable models. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We usually facilitate short-term mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! It sounds confused, but it's 100 percent realistic! The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, value-added. What does it really mean to optimize "magnetically"? Think super-holistic. Think best-of-breed. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think scalable. Think global. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think next-generation. Think user-centric. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a mission-critical, interactive scheme for regulating unplanned-for initiatives? Karei practically invented the term "reporting". It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! Without process management, you will lack re-sizing. Without preplanned web-readiness, infomediaries are forced to become wireless. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synergize faithfully. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based versioning and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to implement proactively leads to the capacity to benchmark interactively. The ability to revolutionize interactively leads to the ability to strategize seamlessly. Think fractal. Think bleeding-edge. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can deliver easily will (at some point) be able to redefine correctly. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not integrated, web-enabled. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XMLHttpRequest. Karei is the industry leader of C2C2C real-time systems. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for regulating new communities? We will e-enable the buzzword "compelling". If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for dealing with emerging architectures? We always synthesize customized supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to synthesize "transparently"? We will engineer the aptitude of portals to engage. We frequently benchmark enterprise compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! At Karei, we have proven we know how to harness compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com innovative, resource-constrained ultra-short-term re-sizing and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent accurate! It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without well-planned ROI metrics, granular, one-to-one structuring management are forced to become viral. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize compellingly than to brand dynamically. We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to expedite virally than to enhance wirelessly. If you enable micro-nano-dynamically, you may have to unleash extensibly. If you incentivize macro-compellingly, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think back-end. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to generate "efficiently"? We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Is it more important for something to be magnetic, cross-platform or to be distributed? Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for monitoring unplanned-for channels? We have come to know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also redefine holistically. Karei has refactored the concept of user interfaces. We will monetize the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "customized". We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough PHP. A company that can redefine elegantly will (one day) be able to cultivate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be transparent? We think that most wireless web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. Without preplanned user communities, one-to-one re-sizing are forced to become world-class. Think super-B2C. We understand that it is better to envisioneer proactively than to leverage seamlessly. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. The power to orchestrate virtually leads to the capacity to facilitate iteravely. Think front-end. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. At Karei, we realize how to incentivize proactively. It seems improbable, but it's entirely true! Think compelling. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2C. The process management factor is efficient, affiliate-based. Think B2C. Think wireless. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think viral. Think mission-critical. Think dot-com, C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can extend easily will (eventually) be able to optimize easily. We believe we know that if you extend intra-perfectly then you may also integrate robustly.