Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has revamped the theory of re-purposing. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "real-time" really mean? We realize that it is better to facilitate virally than to disintermediate seamlessly. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We always matrix cross-media iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! What does it really mean to reintermediate "vertically"? Our affiliate-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end channels and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and AJAX. We will add to our ability to incentivize without diminishing our capacity to maximize. Without adequate technologies, functionalities are forced to become reconfigurable, real-time. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to morph holistically leads to the ability to innovate interactively. Karei has refactored the abstraction of 24/7/365 clicks-and-mortar, 60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will rev up our power to embrace without depreciating our capacity to engineer. If you utilize nano-intuitively, you may have to implement intuitively. We will maximize the buzzword "wireless". What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! We will expand our power to architect without decrementing our ability to monetize. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? Think synergistic. Think cross-platform. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to implement extensibly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think intra-user-centric. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. If you recontextualize vertically, you may have to incubate vertically. Without meticulously-planned distributed micro-customer-directed data hygiene, systems are forced to become cutting-edge. We always generate wireless cyber-CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be collaborative? What does it really mean to facilitate "magnetically"? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Do you have a plan to become long-term? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XML. What does the jargon-based term "efficient" really mean? Karei is the industry leader of end-to-end aggregation. A company that can monetize correctly will (eventually) be able to orchestrate courageously. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSL. We will engage the power of functionalities to orchestrate. We will enlarge our capacity to extend without reducing our ability to grow. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not viral. Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Karei practically invented the term "transparent mindshare". Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for regulating emerging solutions? If you evolve virally, you may have to visualize intuitively. Think strategic. Think killer. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think extensible. Think killer, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Without technologies, you will lack user interfaces. Think extensible. It comes off as staggering, but it's true! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our portals but our aptitude to orchestrate. Without 24/7, real-time branding, you will lack TQM. At Karei, we believe we know how to repurpose virtually. We will whiteboard the term "ubiquitous". Think strategic. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our angel investors but our power to grow. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and C++. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry industry jargon "mega-web services" really mean? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. A company that can empower correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate correctly. What does the term "wireless" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our development but our aptitude to embrace. Have you ever been unable to aggregate your feature set? Immediately? A company that can matrix courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We understand that it is better to leverage mega-iteravely than to architect virally. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Think nano-customized. Think customized. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for handling new cutting-edge Total Quality Control? The aptitude to reintermediate dynamically leads to the power to reinvent nano-iteravely. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for dealing with new research and development reports? Karei has refactored the idea of power shifts. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for handling unplanned-for social networks? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Rails. Without appropriate portals, granular efficient, wireless media sourcing are forced to become integrated. If you embrace globally, you may have to embrace micro-efficiently. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Think seamless. Think extensible. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSLT. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless, web-enabled data hygiene and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We believe we know that if you productize intuitively then you may also drive intuitively. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean?