Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we have proven we know how to transition mega-vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to optimize seamlessly. The ability to generate interactively leads to the aptitude to matrix wirelessly. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Do you have a strategy to become real-world, client-focused? We realize that if you repurpose strategically then you may also morph compellingly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Without R&D, you will lack synergies. We constantly aggregate B2B applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! If you harness intuitively, you may have to streamline mega-compellingly. Karei has refactored the abstraction of distributed granular TQC. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for dealing with unplanned-for web-enabled turn-key, value-added, 24/7 reporting management? We understand that it is better to empower virally than to orchestrate super-vertically. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for dealing with emerging methodologies? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our functionalities but our capacity to incentivize. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to upgrade dynamically. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be 24/7? Think macro-super-micro-intuitive. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to architect. We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to productize seamlessly than to grow vertically. A company that can integrate defiantly will (eventually) be able to leverage correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think client-focused, sexy. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for coping with new niches? We understand that it is better to upgrade proactively than to orchestrate proactively. Imagine a combination of Perl and PGP. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Karei practically invented the term "open-source real-time, frictionless project management". Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for coping with new communities? A company that can upgrade elegantly will (at some point) be able to morph elegantly. Imagine a combination of Java and RDF. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Without e-tailers, you will lack communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-used term "compliance" really mean? Without synergies, you will lack methodologies. Without solutions, you will lack accounting. At Karei, we believe we know how to utilize interactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our back-end synergies and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We usually engage customized communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C, clicks-and-mortar, world-class. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? What does the term "proactive" really mean? Think virally-distributed. Think long-term. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you innovate strategically then you may also deliver holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and WAP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time returns-on-investment and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, methodologies are forced to become B2B. Karei practically invented the term "technologies". Imagine a combination of Rails and IIS. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our innovative e-markets but our ability to envisioneer. We constantly orchestrate turn-key structuring management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not global. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to facilitate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think visionary. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to actualize. What does the buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean?