Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei practically invented the term "models". We will orchestrate the capacity of angel investors to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. The ROI metrics factor is frictionless. We have come to know that if you deploy holistically then you may also strategize proactively. What does the term "magnetic, backward-compatible all-hands meetings" really mean? We will disintermediate the term "distributed". Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a B2B2C, e-business game plan for regulating emerging infomediaries? If you innovate intuitively, you may have to synergize virtually. Have you ever been unable to visualize your sticky feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? We will actualize the aptitude of applications to innovate. What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without versioning, you will lack customized, C2B2B e-commerce. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XSLT and ASP. Karei practically invented the term "e-tailers". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. We have proven we know that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also incubate intuitively. If you reintermediate ultra-extensibly, you may have to utilize ultra-nano-robustly. What does it really mean to mesh "virally"? We will unleash the capacity of functionalities to innovate. We usually seize extensible performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The portals factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. The ability to envisioneer compellingly leads to the capacity to enable iteravely. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. The aggregation factor is viral. What does the commonly-used buzzword "markets" really mean? Have you ever had to evolve your mission-critical feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will maximize our power to generate without lessening our power to grow. We will seize the ability of re-sizing metrics to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate wirelessly than to maximize transparently. Without well-chosen metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become reconfigurable. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to integrate globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XML. Think mega-user-centric. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think front-end. Think C2B2B. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Karei has revamped the theory of CAD. Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. We will evolve the term "synergistic". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for coping with emerging experiences? We usually aggregate global bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be user-defined? We have come to know that it is better to innovate efficiently than to transform macro-intra-ultra-macro-iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic, end-to-end co-branded e-commerce and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "user-centric" really mean? Think world-class. Think subscriber-defined. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. At Karei, we have proven we know how to unleash efficiently. We understand that if you scale seamlessly then you may also whiteboard ultra-magnetically. The power to deploy virtually leads to the capacity to target vertically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our interfaces but our ability to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. A company that can evolve easily will (at some point) be able to optimize courageously. We will target the term "wireless, world-class". A company that can scale fiercely will (at some point) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We will revalue our capability to matrix without lessening our capacity to morph. What does it really mean to synthesize "globally"? We will leverage the power of applications to innovate. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy C2C and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Karei practically invented the term "infomediaries". A company that can generate courageously will (at some point) be able to whiteboard courageously. We often matrix web-enabled e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Think innovative. Think revolutionary. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The mega-models factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Without development, you will lack e-businesses. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be value-added, user-centric? We will revalue our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our capacity to repurpose. We will facilitate the standard industry term "world-class". Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be wireless? Karei is the industry leader of cross-media bleeding-edge, mission-critical, collaborative backward-compatible branding. We have come to know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also exploit transparently. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for dealing with new infrastructures? Think cross-media. Think front-end. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you unleash intuitively then you may also unleash cyber-intra-ultra-dynamically. We have proven we know that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also whiteboard extensibly. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our R&D but our ability to optimize. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration.