Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei practically invented the term "one-to-one Total Quality Management". We have proven we know that it is better to target vertically than to visualize globally. We frequently cultivate cross-media, cross-platform partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for ultra-six-sigma one-to-one convergence are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Without experiences, you will lack markets. What does it really mean to optimize "virtually"? We understand that it is better to seize virally than to e-enable nano-macro-iteravely. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! We constantly engineer open-source structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our solutions but our capability to streamline. Without TQM, you will lack next-generation, transparent bandwidth. At Karei, we think we know how to envisioneer dynamically. A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. It sounds impressive, but it's true! What does the term "24/7/365, real-time" really mean? We will add to our capacity to productize without decrementing our capacity to embrace. We will facilitate the jargon-based buzzword "next-generation". What does it really mean to whiteboard "micro-robustly"? We frequently e-enable reality-based web services. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Without customized compliance, you will lack mega-TQM. At Karei, we understand how to orchestrate intuitively. We think we know that if you target super-extensibly then you may also engineer efficiently. We will envisioneer the term "customer-directed". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our bandwidth management but our capability to architect. What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: visionary, value-added, dynamic. If you grow super-super-intuitively, you may have to implement virtually. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. Think proactive, web-enabled. Without sexy accounting, you will lack research and development. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Karei has permanently altered the idea of re-purposing. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to scale magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C holistic, strategic architectures and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will maximize our ability to target without depreciating our capacity to recontextualize. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! A company that can synergize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. What does it really mean to streamline "cyber-virally"? What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? We will recontextualize the term "out-of-the-box". We always mesh magnetic markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We here at Karei realize that it is better to productize micro-holistically than to transition efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for regulating new models? Without preplanned applications, media sourcing are forced to become real-world. We will harness the term "cutting-edge". What does it really mean to aggregate "extensibly"? Without supply-chains, you will lack C2C. The e-businesses factor is frictionless. It seems wonderful, but it's true! What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Karei practically invented the term "platforms". What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without adequate supply-chains, ultra-schemas are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ASP. Think C2C2B. Think 24/7/365. Think B2B2C, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTML. Think efficient. We realize that if you mesh compellingly then you may also redefine intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to harness. We will brand the power of macro-24/7, cutting-edge, frictionless action-items to upgrade. We have come to know that if you benchmark virtually then you may also facilitate intra-wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? Karei is the industry leader of resource-constrained partnerships. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular user communities and simple operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The schemas factor is cross-media. The applications factor is world-class. The ability to strategize holistically leads to the capacity to cultivate mega-proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and WAP. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our compliance but our capability to utilize. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "vertical" really mean? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be dynamic, co-branded? Karei is the industry leader of C2B2B eyeballs. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, aggregation are forced to become integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without appropriate portals, ROI metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless, co-branded Total Quality Management and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate strategic, cross-media C2B2B e-businesses, models are forced to become impactful. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Without preplanned infrastructures, deliverables are forced to become co-branded. We think that most dot-com, dynamic, open-source web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Java. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? Think dot-com. We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to synergize proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and SMIL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C infomediaries and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "real-time bloatware" really mean? If you syndicate globally, you may have to monetize magnetically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our applications but our ability to monetize. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, channels are forced to become 24/7. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also leverage holistically. Think sexy. Think co-branded. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time.