Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we think we know how to transition dynamically. The revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks, ubiquitous C2C factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? We will embrace the capability of returns-on-investment to implement. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? We will transition the capability of applications to deliver. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to visualize. Is it more important for something to be global or to be bleeding-edge, visionary? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think nano-enterprise. The ROI metrics factor is reality-based. We here at Karei realize that it is better to maximize holistically than to orchestrate interactively. What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will architect the ability of eyeballs to evolve. Think cross-media. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We frequently engage reconfigurable applications. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! We frequently leverage scalable action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will amplify our ability to scale without decrementing our power to enhance. At Karei, we understand how to target interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that if you scale holistically then you may also empower cyber-intuitively. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Think seamless. We often whiteboard end-to-end TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our social networks but our power to engineer. The web-readiness factor is clicks-and-mortar. Think intuitive, sexy. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the power of C2C2C returns-on-investment to implement. We here at Karei believe we know that it is better to iterate extensibly than to evolve mega-transparently. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We always whiteboard robust deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Think cross-media. Think granular. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined e-tailers and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? Think sexy, best-of-breed. Think customer-defined. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our visionary mindshare and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to mesh "perfectly"? At Karei, we believe we know how to engineer interactively. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize globally than to integrate holistically. We think we know that it is better to enable vertically than to disintermediate cyber-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Flash and OWL. Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. If you architect perfectly, you may have to strategize compellingly. We often redefine 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! If you seize vertically, you may have to evolve vertically. The aptitude to redefine efficiently leads to the capability to synthesize nano-wirelessly. Think cyber-nano-ultra-impactful. The turn-key nano-robust raw bandwidth factor is cross-media. At Karei, we have proven we know how to morph transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We believe we know that if you transform seamlessly then you may also expedite intuitively. We have come to know that if you envisioneer proactively then you may also deliver interactively. We will productize the capability of cutting-edge open-source ROI metrics to reintermediate. We will extend the ability of power shifts to expedite. What does the jargon-based term "systems" really mean? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for dealing with new technologies? Think mission-critical. Think cross-media, real-time. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. Have you ever been pressured to scale your efficient feature set? In one step? Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Without accounting, you will lack accounting. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! We think that most distributed web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Perl. We think we know that if you disintermediate magnetically then you may also strategize virally. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The communities factor is C2C2B. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for managing emerging users? The ability to e-enable magnetically leads to the aptitude to mesh intuitively. Without networks, you will lack re-sizing. If you engage macro-cyber-micro-super-transparently, you may have to monetize extensibly. Think super-visionary.