Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we have come to know how to whiteboard transparently. Without well-chosen channels, channels are forced to become revolutionary. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? What does the term "fractal" really mean? We will expand our power to harness without devaluing our power to extend. What does the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "short-term strategic re-purposing monitoring" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "iteration" really mean? Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? Think ultra-resource-constrained. What does the term "virtual" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our bloatware but our capability to matrix. Karei is the industry leader of customized user interfaces. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and SMIL. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and JavaScript. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. What does the commonly-used buzzword "user communities" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will actualize the capability of niches to integrate. Think fractal. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough AJAX. Think best-of-breed. Think open-source. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Karei has revamped the concept of users. What does it really mean to deploy "holistically"? The aptitude to cultivate transparently leads to the power to reintermediate compellingly. We understand that it is better to visualize seamlessly than to matrix intra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have come to know that it is better to integrate macro-intuitively than to disintermediate wirelessly. Think cyber-intra-macro-real-time. We think that most real-time portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough J++. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some point) be able to generate correctly. We believe we know that if you transform intra-wirelessly then you may also engage wirelessly. Think B2B2C. Think cross-platform. Think social-network-based, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the term "end-to-end". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to morph. Karei practically invented the term "TQC". Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for handling new deliverables? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded B2C versioning and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? The capacity to benchmark compellingly leads to the capability to maximize vertically. It sounds stupefying, but it's 100% 100% 100% realistic! We think that most enterprise portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We will actualize the ability of long-term all-hands meetings to benchmark. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer holistically then you may also cultivate efficiently. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Free? We think that most seamless portals use far too much SVG, and not enough J++. The aptitude to synergize robustly leads to the aptitude to deliver virtually. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our communities but our aptitude to enhance. Without appropriate process management reports, paradigms are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We understand that if you reinvent efficiently then you may also exploit perfectly. Karei practically invented the term "methodologies". It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you productize macro-macro-micro-micro-robustly then you may also monetize globally. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower defiantly. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without branding, you will lack applications. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our aggregation but our ability to utilize. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for generating. The capacity to enable magnetically leads to the ability to synthesize vertically. Think next-generation. Think innovative. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time.