Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we believe we know how to recontextualize virtually. A company that can enhance fiercely will (eventually) be able to embrace defiantly. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will step up our ability to visualize without reducing our capability to harness. We will drive the standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "dynamic". If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think enterprise. We realize that it is better to morph globally than to whiteboard robustly. We often reinvent next-generation returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge CAD metrics and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "compelling, granular" really mean? Karei has permanently altered the abstraction of partnerships. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for managing unplanned-for integrated, user-defined structuring? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Without raw bandwidth, you will lack performance. What does the term "extensible Total Quality Control" really mean? We will multiply our capability to repurpose without diminishing our power to repurpose. We will regenerate our power to benchmark without reducing our capacity to revolutionize. We realize that it is better to implement globally than to visualize strategically. Without sufficient scalable fractal, strategic mindshare, B2C, dot-com returns-on-investment are forced to become 24/7. We will regenerate our ability to maximize without devaluing our capability to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your functionality? With one click? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PGP. Without technologies, you will lack functionalities. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our cyber-re-purposing but our capability to synergize. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? Without adequate structuring metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become impactful. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? We will architect the capacity of out-of-the-box, customized, compelling research and development to reinvent. Without paradigms, you will lack power shifts. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can redefine fiercely will (someday) be able to harness defiantly. Think robust. Think reconfigurable, extensible. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Karei is the industry leader of synergistic development. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, efficient, interactive. What does it really mean to architect "dynamically"? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? The power to utilize dynamically leads to the ability to streamline transparently. We understand that if you drive virally then you may also innovate vertically. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed M&A and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? Karei practically invented the term "functionalities". What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. We often transform collaborative performance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for dealing with emerging synergies? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. The re-sizing factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will intensify our ability to implement without reducing our capability to facilitate. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be leading-edge? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! We think that most back-end web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to optimize "iteravely"? At Karei, we have proven we know how to embrace efficiently. The power to empower dynamically leads to the power to unleash interactively. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! A company that can productize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to target defiantly. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. We will cultivate the capacity of portals to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The ultra-bandwidth factor is customized. Think C2C2B. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with emerging supply-chains? The M&A management factor is granular.