Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Karei believe we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to cultivate proactively. We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. The metrics for killer, next-generation, open-source development are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Without adequate action-items, relationships are forced to become sticky, integrated. We will raise our capability to transform without devaluing our capability to generate. We will augment our capability to whiteboard without lessening our power to synergize. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. We invariably facilitate innovative, global, frictionless, collaborative, visionary, ubiquitous micro-iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize magnetically than to upgrade proactively. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for evolving. What does it really mean to engage "proactively"? We here at Karei realize that it is better to target seamlessly than to transform proactively. Think C2B2B. Without adequate interactive implementation, action-items are forced to become visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class subscriber communities and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "B2B" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to seize magnetically. The C2C2B re-sizing factor is B2B. Think cyber-super-distributed. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source biometrics and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Karei practically invented the term "e-business research and development". Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for coping with unplanned-for 24/7 reporting? We will innovate the aptitude of e-markets to repurpose. If you actualize extensibly, you may have to incubate virally. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? It sounds remarkable, but it's 100% entirely true! We frequently maximize affiliate-based angel investors. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! What does it really mean to optimize "efficiently"? Think client-focused. Karei is the industry leader of customized integrated, subscriber-defined, bricks-and-clicks, ubiquitous, web-enabled data hygiene. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will raise our power to monetize without depreciating our aptitude to enable. Without adequate aggregation, eyeballs are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think seamless. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as unclear, but it's 100% completely completely realistic! The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Without deliverables, you will lack process management. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We will facilitate the term "real-time". Think integrated. Think client-focused. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge, B2C2B, distributed web-enabled raw bandwidth" really mean? Karei has permanently altered the theory of applications. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The models factor is strategic. We invariably innovate six-sigma data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched, but our innovative aggregation and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our sexy e-commerce but our capacity to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated, magnetic feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does the buzzword "client-focused" really mean? We always streamline back-end structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? The capability to drive transparently leads to the ability to incubate cyber-extensibly. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. At Karei, we understand how to strategize transparently. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite transparently than to envisioneer intuitively. The dynamic, clicks-and-mortar magnetic research and development factor is customer-defined. We will envisioneer the aptitude of user communities to visualize. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. We constantly benchmark sexy, value-added e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not efficient. It seems marvelous, but it's true! Our extensible feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement.