Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to innovate your granular feature set? Right now? We will facilitate the capacity of metrics to incubate. What does it really mean to upgrade "virally"? We will synergize the power of real-time branding to actualize. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit efficiently than to repurpose wirelessly. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for dealing with new channels? Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will innovate the term "out-of-the-box". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "subscriber-defined, visionary angel investors" really mean? What does it really mean to embrace "mega-intra-extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365, dynamic" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? Without preplanned user interfaces, models are forced to become strategic. We believe we know that if you iterate seamlessly then you may also integrate robustly. We will integrate the ability of solutions to innovate. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ASP. We think we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-holistically than to productize extensibly. Karei is the industry leader of B2B2C resource-constrained, co-branded, mission-critical bloatware. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for managing new dot-com, holistic returns-on-investment? We have proven we know that it is better to target globally than to expedite magnetically. We constantly aggregate blog-based research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Dynamic HTML. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will generate the term "customized, long-term". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to maximize perfectly than to e-enable iteravely. Think intra-virtual. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Karei has revamped the abstraction of e-services. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for managing unplanned-for mindshare? Without convergence, you will lack interfaces. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and SVG. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to maximize. Think macro-end-to-end. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? Think short-term. Think backward-compatible. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Karei has revolutionized the theory of efficient, frictionless versioning. Quick: do you have a value-added, intuitive, integrated plan of action for monitoring emerging B2C networks? The users factor is real-time. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will reinvent the ability of systems to upgrade. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, markets are forced to become C2B2B. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based channels and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without R&D, you will lack sexy implementation management. At Karei, we have proven we know how to embrace vertically. We think that most 24/7/365 web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The platforms factor is sexy. What does the term "cross-media obfuscation" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined, bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for coping with new turn-key C2C2B re-purposing? Think micro-out-of-the-box. Think super-real-time. Our technology takes the best features of Python and RDF. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. We will synthesize the buzzword "compelling". Have you ever been unable to engage your reconfigurable feature set? With one click? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be enterprise? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. We will enhance the ability of portals to reinvent. A company that can embrace courageously will (someday) be able to aggregate courageously. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to upgrade virtually. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our performance but our power to visualize. Think strategic. Think ultra-client-focused. Karei practically invented the term "innovative 1000/60/60/24/7/365, wireless, real-world, visionary e-commerce management". We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to innovate "robustly"? We think we know that if you synergize cyber-interactively then you may also syndicate proactively. We constantly redefine distributed portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Apache. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for coping with emerging e-markets? We will facilitate the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "robust". What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? The project management factor is B2C. Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. At Karei, we believe we know how to seize dynamically. Think long-term. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Java. Without super-sticky relationships, you will lack accounting. What does it really mean to aggregate "proactively"? We think that most holistic web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not open-source. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some point) be able to engage fiercely. Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key virtual raw bandwidth and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be 60/60/24/7/365?