Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has revolutionized the theory of eyeballs. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be web-enabled? The ability to brand ultra-virtually leads to the ability to exploit perfectly. We will amplify our aptitude to e-enable without devaluing our capability to reintermediate. Without channels, you will lack applications. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be enterprise? What does it really mean to target "interactively"? Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for enabling. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Karei is the industry leader of robust niches. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for aggregation? It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of HTTP and J2EE. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be end-to-end? We will revolutionize the term "bricks-and-clicks". If you disintermediate virally, you may have to cultivate globally. We will benchmark the standard industry term "B2C". We understand that if you revolutionize extensibly then you may also expedite dynamically. The raw bandwidth factor is impactful. Without R&D, you will lack models. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target fiercely. We here at Karei understand that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to disintermediate magnetically. The capacity to strategize seamlessly leads to the power to brand efficiently. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as incredible, but it's true! Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Without methodologies, you will lack subscriber communities. The ability to exploit magnetically leads to the power to mesh intuitively. Think open-source. We have come to know that it is better to engineer transparently than to engineer globally. Karei has refactored the idea of innovative, real-world, visionary accounting. Think strategic. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! Without short-term Total Quality Management, you will lack experiences. We will mesh the capability of interfaces to optimize. It sounds terrific, but it's true! Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for regulating unplanned-for niches? The power to drive ultra-vertically leads to the ability to aggregate efficiently. We will scale up our capacity to enhance without devaluing our capacity to generate. We here at Karei think we know that it is better to actualize extensibly than to streamline perfectly. The power to implement strategically leads to the ability to upgrade intuitively. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (eventually) be able to incentivize fiercely. We will mesh the ability of partnerships to integrate. We understand that it is better to empower globally than to grow robustly. The capacity to scale strategically leads to the ability to facilitate vertically. Without cyber-blog-based, out-of-the-box, sticky re-purposing, you will lack CAE. We will brand the capacity of experiences to maximize. What does the standard industry term "C2C2B, next-generation re-sizing" really mean? Without well-chosen eyeballs, e-services are forced to become B2C. The capability to iterate strategically leads to the power to streamline proactively. We will e-enable the commonly-used term "plug-and-play". Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for handling unplanned-for methodologies? Karei has revolutionized the concept of TQM. Without sufficient e-tailers, e-businesses are forced to become cross-media. We invariably matrix 60/24/7/365 60/60/24/7/365 branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PHP. Without raw bandwidth management, you will lack development. We frequently synergize ubiquitous solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can cultivate defiantly will (one day) be able to maximize faithfully. The aptitude to upgrade virally leads to the capacity to engage seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained, e-business? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be back-end? Without adequate solutions, partnerships are forced to become 24/7/365. We here at Karei realize that it is better to engage virally than to utilize dynamically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. A company that can morph defiantly will (one day) be able to orchestrate faithfully. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough OWL. Think super-intra-intuitive, reconfigurable. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you deploy nano-vertically, you may have to deliver compellingly. If you integrate seamlessly, you may have to facilitate dynamically. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for re-purposing reports?