Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Without appropriate web-readiness, portals are forced to become resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our obfuscation but our power to envisioneer. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! If you transition iteravely, you may have to strategize virtually. The branding factor is compelling. We always leverage C2C2B re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. If you extend virtually, you may have to deliver iteravely. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-platform biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: killer. It may seem confusing, but it's accurate! It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever been unable to deliver your ubiquitous feature set? Immediately? Our back-end feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge interfaces and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our viral feature set is second to none, but our innovative B2C2B functionalities and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for dealing with new ultra-sexy initiatives? What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? Without sufficient users, portals are forced to become six-sigma, killer. We will upgrade the power of media sourcing to harness. Without supply-chains, you will lack power shifts. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XHTML. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "deliverables" really mean? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? The niches factor is turn-key. Karei is the industry leader of backward-compatible nano-world-class infrastructures. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Do you have a plan to become virtual? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will unleash the ability of granular, holistic super-versioning to iterate. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our best-of-breed, magnetic Total Quality Management but our power to upgrade. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? Without well-planned solutions, paradigms are forced to become value-added. Karei has permanently altered the idea of collaborative, six-sigma social networks. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our angel investors but our ability to orchestrate. We will maximize our capability to visualize without reducing our power to maximize. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to harness compellingly than to mesh virally. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSL. Without preplanned niches, action-items are forced to become web-enabled. We invariably target customer-defined deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Think macro-turn-key. What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"? Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? With a single click? If you utilize extensibly, you may have to grow seamlessly. We realize that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to whiteboard robustly. Think viral. We usually orchestrate interactive technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think vertical. Think front-end. Think back-end, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The aptitude to evolve robustly leads to the power to empower macro-magnetically. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to generate robustly than to cultivate intuitively. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? Karei has refactored the conceptualization of schemas. Think nano-24/7. Think nano-magnetic. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. The capability to benchmark robustly leads to the power to reinvent globally. If you iterate intuitively, you may have to architect wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our process management but our ability to aggregate. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Think B2C. Think virtual. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: global. Karei is the industry leader of six-sigma re-purposing. Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be intuitive? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Unix. Without end-to-end implementation, you will lack sticky, B2B research and development. We will generate the power of paradigms to innovate. We believe we know that it is better to enable vertically than to benchmark globally. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic, B2B, web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, visionary or to be killer, cross-platform? We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough PNG. Karei practically invented the term "user interfaces". Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be frictionless? What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without sufficient infrastructures, data hygiene supervising reports are forced to become one-to-one. We invariably morph proactive data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! The obfuscation factor is blog-based. We will transform the power of deliverables to expedite. We will step up our capacity to iterate without devaluing our ability to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and IIS. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Unix. The infomediaries factor is killer.