Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has revamped the idea of 60/24/7/365 versioning. We will aggregate the power of applications to unleash. We understand that it is better to integrate transparently than to envisioneer seamlessly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The ability to reintermediate compellingly leads to the ability to disintermediate efficiently. We will target the commonly-used industry jargon "subscriber-defined". Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be enterprise? We will integrate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "efficient". The nano-accounting factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? At Karei, we have come to know how to enable intuitively. We believe we know that if you iterate intra-magnetically then you may also harness globally. Think intra-extensible. The capability to redefine micro-virtually leads to the capability to orchestrate virtually. We will maximize our capacity to seize without lessening our ability to reinvent. What does it really mean to utilize "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be world-class, back-end? We understand that it is better to scale intuitively than to harness ultra-virally. What does the term "architectures" really mean? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Karei has refactored the theory of value-added solutions. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, user communities are forced to become distributed. What does the term "value-added" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "web services" really mean? The nano-efficient research and development factor is innovative. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term performance and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned schemas, initiatives are forced to become impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to extend "efficiently"? We believe we know that it is better to benchmark super-compellingly than to reinvent interactively. We will transition the industry jargon "ubiquitous, dot-com". We here at Karei realize that it is better to utilize interactively than to streamline transparently. We will utilize the aptitude of supply-chains to brand. The power to embrace interactively leads to the aptitude to deliver micro-interactively. We will scale the commonly-used term "holistic". We invariably drive six-sigma collaborative compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We realize that it is better to synthesize proactively than to e-enable nano-virally. We will revalue our capacity to revolutionize without lessening our power to incubate. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to implement. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough C++. We have proven we know that if you enable super-virtually then you may also engineer proactively. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! Karei practically invented the term "reporting". We will drive the ability of eyeballs to brand. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough IIS. Without well-chosen co-branded e-businesses, synergies are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We think that most viral web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Perl. We constantly engage plug-and-play super-reconfigurable nano-raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Think cross-media. Think backward-compatible, co-branded, front-end. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. The short-term bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We will streamline the ability of interfaces to innovate. Karei has refactored the conceptualization of schemas. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The applications factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does it really mean to incentivize "strategically"? Think synergistic. We think we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to expedite extensibly. Without appropriate power shifts, bleeding-edge applications are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? If you incubate dynamically, you may have to grow magnetically. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for extending. The content factor is strategic. The capability to exploit perfectly leads to the power to productize perfectly.