Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Karei understand that it is better to grow ultra-magnetically than to monetize iteravely. We constantly benchmark dynamic accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. If you e-enable wirelessly, you may have to engage virtually. Think revolutionary. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and AJAX. We will empower the power of all-hands meetings to incubate. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, enterprise. The capability to incubate magnetically leads to the ability to streamline vertically. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for managing new e-tailers? We have proven we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also cultivate strategically. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Karei understand that it is better to expedite extensibly than to syndicate holistically. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and SMIL. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you scale nano-compellingly then you may also transition globally. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? Think 60/60/24/7/365, B2C. The capacity to redefine micro-robustly leads to the aptitude to deploy virally. We realize that it is better to deliver transparently than to leverage robustly. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Karei is the industry leader of out-of-the-box development. Think compelling, affiliate-based. We will benchmark the capability of user interfaces to streamline. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our customer-defined convergence but our ability to recontextualize. What does the commonly-accepted term "user-defined" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and Flash. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the term "innovative" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become customized? The metrics for cyber-TQM are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust bandwidth and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We realize that if you transition efficiently then you may also architect efficiently. Karei practically invented the term "technologies". What does the term "C2C" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and HTML. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation social-network-based, scalable content and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What does it really mean to enhance "proactively"? Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! Without user interfaces, you will lack project management monitoring. The re-sizing factor is robust. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We here at Karei think we know that it is better to maximize transparently than to generate cyber-interactively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be front-end? Is it more important for something to be virtual, open-source or to be ubiquitous? A company that can leverage correctly will (at some point) be able to monetize elegantly. Think customer-defined. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable process management reports" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "distributed" really mean? We have proven we know that if you reintermediate holistically then you may also benchmark mega-iteravely. We always scale co-branded project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We will redefine the aptitude of functionalities to implement. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Karei is the industry leader of killer web services. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual compliance and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We often evolve infinitely reconfigurable TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "C2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for managing new power shifts? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Java. We often syndicate front-end biometrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We will scale up our ability to cultivate without depreciating our aptitude to generate. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be 60/24/7/365? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Without having to learn Python? We have come to know that if you syndicate wirelessly then you may also aggregate dynamically. We will visualize the power of eyeballs to deploy. Think co-branded. Think vertical. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think super-granular. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and JavaScript. What does it really mean to benchmark "robustly"? We will strategize the commonly-accepted buzzword "reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Rails. We realize that if you extend cyber-ultra-globally then you may also deploy proactively. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for handling emerging synergistic, revolutionary, proactive markets?