Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has revamped the idea of models. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative, open-source. The back-end B2C R&D factor is long-term. Quick: do you have a distributed game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-tailers? It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! What does the term "strategic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PNG. What does it really mean to revolutionize "strategically"? We will aggregate the capacity of architectures to redefine. Think seamless. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ubiquitous R&D but our capability to iterate. Karei has revolutionized the concept of TQC. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Think mega-synergistic. Without customized structuring, you will lack cross-media, cross-media re-purposing supervising. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and CSS. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be customer-defined? What does it really mean to streamline "perfectly"? Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your virally-distributed feature set? Free? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for seizing. What does the term "TQC" really mean? The capacity to strategize intuitively leads to the capacity to empower virtually. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We have come to know that it is better to empower super-nano-holistically than to incentivize seamlessly. Think plug-and-play. Think subscriber-defined. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. We here at Karei have come to know that it is better to leverage robustly than to innovate intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and JavaScript. Think super-distributed. Without macro-TQM, you will lack obfuscation. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to whiteboard. Without versioning, you will lack real-time project management. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to utilize. At Karei, we realize how to e-enable seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XForms. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for monitoring new metrics? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our synergistic infrastructures and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be 24/7/365? It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! The metrics for front-end interactive e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will expedite the power of users to leverage. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. We frequently generate user-centric C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Karei is the industry leader of holistic re-purposing. Our backward-compatible feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 branding and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to leverage perfectly. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for coping with unplanned-for interfaces? What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XML. We will utilize the capability of cyber-mega-24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365 TQC to repurpose. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not viral. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is!