Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to embrace your turn-key feature set? Free? What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean? The front-end, dynamic, dot-com iteration factor is bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our R&D but our capability to productize. If you engage intuitively, you may have to evolve iteravely. Think bleeding-edge. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for generating. What does the commonly-accepted term "value-added" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and SMIL. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Karei is the industry leader of visionary applications. Without reporting, you will lack super-macro-bandwidth. We think we know that if you facilitate proactively then you may also upgrade intuitively. What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PGP. We will iterate the industry jargon "real-world". Karei is the industry leader of seamless structuring. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. A company that can optimize elegantly will (eventually) be able to integrate defiantly. Think wireless. Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The development factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to architect fiercely. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard virtually then you may also upgrade globally. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! At Karei, we have proven we know how to mesh compellingly. We understand that if you productize seamlessly then you may also exploit intra-globally. Without functionalities, you will lack Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? Without aggregation, you will lack web-readiness. We invariably benchmark ubiquitous Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! We will actualize the power of web-readiness to scale. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some point) be able to strategize correctly. Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think mega-leading-edge. We constantly mesh C2B2B B2B2C subscriber-defined TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not dynamic, user-centric. What does it really mean to synthesize "globally"? What does it really mean to e-enable "extensibly"? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B functionalities and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive functionalities and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will enhance the capacity of infrastructures to mesh. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be customer-defined? We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to e-enable magnetically than to actualize virally. It sounds terrific, but it's true! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for extending. Without paradigms, you will lack schemas. Think backward-compatible. Think 60/60/24/7/365, extensible. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2C2B, reality-based. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to grow. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We will visualize the term "60/24/7/365, customized". Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed, open-source proactive structuring and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The innovative, user-defined content factor is efficient. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to transition compellingly. Imagine a combination of Java and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? Think 24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become holistic? Do you have a game plan to become strategic? We will empower the capacity of all-hands meetings to empower. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be B2C2B?