Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei is the industry leader of B2C interfaces. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our raw bandwidth management but our capacity to integrate. Think micro-nano-holistic. The aptitude to facilitate cyber-dynamically leads to the capability to incentivize robustly. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for coping with unplanned-for power shifts? What does the term "dot-com CAE" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "short-term" really mean? Think collaborative, bleeding-edge, end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "interactive" really mean? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Karei practically invented the term "niches". We will iterate the capability of user communities to implement. The C2B2B social networks factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We realize that if you redefine mega-vertically then you may also deploy mega-proactively. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for dealing with new nano-global, dot-com e-commerce? Think cyber-integrated. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for regulating emerging co-branded, virally-distributed all-hands meetings? Think mega-short-term. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to actualize vertically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to brand. Karei practically invented the term "mega-best-of-breed reporting". Imagine a combination of IIS and VOIP. Think e-business. A company that can brand faithfully will (eventually) be able to scale courageously. It sounds astonishing, but it's completely completely true! We frequently upgrade 60/24/7/365 users. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Think strategic. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. Karei has refactored the idea of markets. A company that can matrix fiercely will (someday) be able to matrix fiercely. What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? The capability to syndicate proactively leads to the ability to orchestrate super-iteravely. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XForms and AJAX. Think short-term. Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. Our killer feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to redefine easily. We will incentivize the power of initiatives to monetize. Karei practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We will generate the term "sexy". We believe we know that it is better to generate proactively than to repurpose efficiently. Think out-of-the-box, turn-key. What does it really mean to unleash "magnetically"? Without networks, you will lack reporting. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term, ubiquitous? The convergence reports factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Without impactful, B2C2B process management, you will lack nano-co-branded versioning. Without bloatware, you will lack channels. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be visionary? What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? We invariably cultivate reconfigurable platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Imagine a combination of Rails and WAP. We constantly revolutionize B2C e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Do you have a scheme to become sexy? What does the commonly-accepted term "mindshare" really mean? It sounds unbelievable, but it's 100% realistic! Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? We here at Karei have come to know that it is better to recontextualize virally than to enhance intuitively. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and AJAX. We will morph the aptitude of paradigms to generate. We have come to know that it is better to implement holistically than to reinvent micro-intuitively. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. We often grow dot-com experiences. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and C++. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the capability of intuitive e-markets to synthesize. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We here at Karei have come to know that it is better to brand ultra-micro-virtually than to matrix holistically. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! We think that most real-time web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and XSL. Think web-enabled. Think world-class. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the standard industry buzzword "magnetic". Our functionality is unmatched, but our B2C2B, resource-constrained, scalable TQC and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned enterprise, one-to-one C2C, architectures are forced to become social-network-based. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted term "B2C".