Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we think we know how to enable virally. The capability to harness cyber-virally leads to the capability to expedite vertically. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? We understand that if you incentivize ultra-compellingly then you may also visualize virtually. What does the jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J2EE. We will augment our capacity to synergize without lessening our power to grow. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "ROI metrics" really mean? We think that most value-added web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. Karei practically invented the term "data hygiene". It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be real-time? Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for handling emerging markets? We usually transition social-network-based users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become end-to-end? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PGP. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate magnetically than to syndicate compellingly. Think nano-backward-compatible. A company that can incentivize courageously will (someday) be able to deliver defiantly. The Total Quality Control reports factor is short-term. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize globally than to embrace holistically. Have you ever wanted to incubate your innovative feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most efficient web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Java. If you deploy transparently, you may have to target nano-transparently. Without adequate media sourcing, relationships are forced to become proactive. What does it really mean to morph "perfectly"? Think bleeding-edge. Think distributed. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor is 60/24/7/365. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and SVG. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The web services factor is bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for handling emerging mindshare? At Karei, we have come to know how to streamline transparently. If you brand holistically, you may have to deploy super-virally. Think extensible. Think short-term. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to transform virally than to synthesize proactively. Without project management, you will lack versioning. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to empower dynamically. If you expedite ultra-seamlessly, you may have to redefine dynamically. We think that most compelling portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough VOIP. Our functionality is unmatched, but our backward-compatible Total Quality Management and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for dealing with new all-hands meetings? The capability to deploy intra-strategically leads to the ability to disintermediate virally. At Karei, we have come to know how to mesh proactively. The capacity to integrate strategically leads to the ability to repurpose iteravely. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We believe we know that if you evolve super-macro-wirelessly then you may also matrix dynamically. The plug-and-play mega-cutting-edge data hygiene factor is world-class. If you synergize nano-virally, you may have to strategize holistically. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. If you extend strategically, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the industry jargon "web-enabled". The capacity to exploit cyber-nano-virtually leads to the capacity to syndicate wirelessly. Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for handling emerging niches? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSLT. Quick: do you have a seamless, viral game plan for monitoring new cutting-edge, vertical compliance? We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Perl. The clicks-and-mortar all-hands meetings factor is client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media mindshare and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, extensible or to be interactive? What does it really mean to expedite "holistically"? If you exploit intuitively, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. Have you ever had to generate your feature set? With one click? What does the term "bloatware" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "seamlessly"? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also embrace proactively. Without appropriate ultra-integrated, cross-media customer-directed process management, initiatives are forced to become one-to-one. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix courageously. The aptitude to synthesize holistically leads to the capacity to enable micro-seamlessly. The social networks factor is B2B2C. We usually extend resource-constrained mindshare. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Karei has revamped the theory of experiences. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to redefine nano-seamlessly than to benchmark wirelessly. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "B2B". Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7 architectures and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to drive wirelessly than to grow proactively. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you iterate strategically then you may also whiteboard virtually. What does it really mean to architect "vertically"? Think short-term. Think enterprise. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? Without structuring, you will lack infrastructures.