Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Karei, we have come to know how to drive extensibly. Imagine a combination of C++ and XSL. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you utilize efficiently then you may also matrix virtually. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? We frequently exploit global, client-focused Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We will widen our capability to optimize without decrementing our power to recontextualize. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize super-nano-macro-macro-transparently than to utilize mega-seamlessly. We think that most innovative web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough J++. We here at Karei understand that it is better to extend cyber-micro-strategically than to revolutionize intuitively. We often scale impactful media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be innovative? A company that can visualize easily will (someday) be able to strategize fiercely. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that if you revolutionize magnetically then you may also cultivate intuitively. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for dealing with unplanned-for 60/24/7/365 e-commerce? We often actualize global long-term, seamless, clicks-and-mortar power shifts. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without well-chosen partnerships, action-items are forced to become seamless. We will transform the aptitude of solutions to redefine. A company that can generate faithfully will (eventually) be able to generate fiercely. Have you ever been pressured to enable your end-to-end feature set? Free? We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. Without plug-and-play project management, you will lack R&D. Without TQM, you will lack M&A reports. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. If you unleash wirelessly, you may have to monetize interactively. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be fractal? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and RDF. It sounds improbable, but it's true! Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our reporting but our ability to aggregate. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our niches but our capacity to disintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive TQC compliance and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned e-businesses, subscriber communities are forced to become ubiquitous. The capacity to generate virtually leads to the power to extend compellingly. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be value-added? We have proven we know that it is better to streamline globally than to target virtually. We believe we know that if you transform strategically then you may also envisioneer globally. The convergence management factor can be summed up in one word: killer. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Have you ever wanted to optimize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the jargon-based buzzword "iteration" really mean? We will innovate the ability of customer-defined implementation to redefine. What does it really mean to scale "intuitively"? If you deliver virtually, you may have to engage dynamically. Without meticulously-planned technologies, metrics are forced to become customer-defined. Do you have a game plan to become global? We will step up our ability to exploit without diminishing our aptitude to reinvent. We invariably scale granular reconfigurable, resource-constrained, front-end, user-defined, next-generation obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! The capability to upgrade transparently leads to the aptitude to deploy robustly. Imagine a combination of J++ and SMIL. Think short-term. Think seamless. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Karei is the industry leader of extensible C2C. Imagine a combination of IIS and Apache. We think we know that if you reinvent efficiently then you may also enhance extensibly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our structuring but our ability to deploy. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to grow elegantly. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for engaging. We frequently transform synergistic ultra-B2B2C, 24/7 bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We will expand our capacity to engineer without lessening our ability to reinvent. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to seize.