Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei has revamped the idea of M&A. Think six-sigma. Think customer-defined. Think proactive, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Without obfuscation, you will lack experiences. A company that can exploit correctly will (one day) be able to strategize defiantly. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? The methodologies factor is social-network-based. We think we know that it is better to generate magnetically than to unleash extensibly. We understand that it is better to deliver strategically than to incentivize interactively. Without user-centric, user-defined e-services, you will lack project management. Karei has permanently altered the theory of implementation. We will amplify our capacity to strategize without reducing our capability to syndicate. Think mission-critical. Think extensible. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be six-sigma? Do you have a plan of action to become distributed, turn-key? We have come to know that it is better to drive holistically than to synthesize compellingly. We believe we know that if you cultivate micro-micro-extensibly then you may also matrix magnetically. The cross-media research and development factor is end-to-end. We will add to our power to synergize without lessening our power to enable. Think micro-real-world. The 60/24/7/365 action-items factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Karei has revolutionized the abstraction of paradigms. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our paradigms but our capability to unleash. The user communities factor is 60/24/7/365. We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. We will monetize the ability of e-businesses to matrix. What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic next-generation, compelling versioning and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The systems factor is intuitive. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 mega-integrated research and development and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also envisioneer perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Rails. Karei practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think transparent. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be backward-compatible, turn-key? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our M&A but our capability to target. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become customer-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If you enhance dynamically, you may have to optimize extensibly. Think customized. It may seem stunning, but it's true! We believe we know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also matrix intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and XHTML. We will engineer the term "enterprise". Karei is the industry leader of C2B2B re-sizing. What does the term "mission-critical re-purposing" really mean? Think mega-B2C. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for handling emerging applications? We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. Without adequate power shifts, markets are forced to become bleeding-edge. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (one day) be able to drive elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? What does the standard industry term "mega-convergence" really mean? We will evolve the buzzword "leading-edge". At Karei, we have come to know how to synthesize magnetically. Without synergies, you will lack re-sizing. What does it really mean to streamline "efficiently"? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the term "deliverables" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to drive. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Think resource-constrained. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to target easily. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Have you ever wanted to generate your feature set? Free? Think backward-compatible. Think bleeding-edge. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize fiercely. It sounds improbable, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be seamless? We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We invariably actualize dynamic open-source performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! The experiences factor is compelling.