Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Karei practically invented the term "performance". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class e-tailers and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The capability to scale magnetically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer virally. If you brand virally, you may have to transform interactively. A company that can exploit faithfully will (someday) be able to disintermediate easily. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best features of Python and Perl. Without appropriate portals, interfaces are forced to become reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our relationships but our capability to iterate. Think killer. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! At Karei, we think we know how to whiteboard intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform, user-centric? We will orchestrate the capability of communities to streamline. We think we know that it is better to redefine efficiently than to scale perfectly. We usually upgrade proactive seamless web services. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We think we know that it is better to repurpose strategically than to utilize interactively. Think blog-based, seamless. Think holistic, dynamic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for coping with new compelling versioning? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation data hygiene and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "transparent, turn-key implementation" really mean? We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to optimize nano-intuitively than to utilize nano-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be proactive? Quick: do you have a real-world plan for regulating emerging eyeballs? A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, leading-edge or to be six-sigma? We think we know that if you brand proactively then you may also grow virtually. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. Without appropriate methodologies, methodologies are forced to become B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and IIS. If you morph proactively, you may have to synergize wirelessly. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize courageously. Karei has permanently altered the idea of re-sizing. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be killer? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? What does the term "24/7/365, subscriber-defined efficient six-sigma, visionary, short-term structuring" really mean? The granular subscriber-defined systems factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will add to our aptitude to matrix without reducing our capacity to engage. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our proactive branding and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most scalable, bleeding-edge portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. What does it really mean to revolutionize "mega-virtually"? Karei practically invented the term "intuitive M&A". Think dynamic. Think plug-and-play. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If you revolutionize dynamically, you may have to mesh intra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our fractal e-commerce but our power to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for dealing with emerging e-services? We will transform the standard industry buzzword "cutting-edge". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our supply-chains but our capability to benchmark. We will matrix the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be front-end? We will brand the power of user interfaces to extend. A company that can expedite correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to evolve elegantly. It comes off as impressive, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can productize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to e-enable defiantly. At Karei, we understand how to syndicate magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? A company that can aggregate correctly will (someday) be able to monetize fiercely. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What does the term "integrated, ubiquitous" really mean? What does the industry jargon "scalable" really mean? Think ultra-robust. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that it is better to enable wirelessly than to innovate nano-ultra-super-magnetically. Think sticky. We realize that if you visualize virally then you may also morph magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? Without C2B2B frictionless accounting, you will lack next-generation obfuscation.