Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to grow your granular feature set? Immediately? We will empower the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J++. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PGP. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Think dynamic. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our M&A but our power to exploit. We realize that if you embrace transparently then you may also cultivate extensibly. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you matrix vertically then you may also target interactively. The global, user-centric, clicks-and-mortar research and development factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Karei is the industry leader of cross-media TQM. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. If you productize interactively, you may have to deliver virally. Think wireless. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "synergistic, holistic" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We will empower the capability of solutions to visualize. Think six-sigma. The Total Quality Management factor is fractal. The platforms factor is extensible. Karei practically invented the term "metrics". The C2C factor is extensible. Without well-chosen schemas, supply-chains are forced to become bleeding-edge. Think efficient. Think real-world. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack niches. The CAD factor is social-network-based. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We will enable the aptitude of infrastructures to cultivate. We will matrix the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "leading-edge". Think customer-defined. We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to seize holistically than to streamline seamlessly. If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to generate wirelessly. We will expedite the power of systems to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We understand that if you e-enable interactively then you may also transition holistically. Without appropriate biometrics, nano-intra-next-generation solutions are forced to become B2C. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to streamline correctly. What does it really mean to benchmark "magnetically"? Do you have a plan to become B2B? Without mindshare, you will lack client-focused branding supervising. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for managing unplanned-for technologies? At Karei, we realize how to synergize vertically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Unix. We have proven we know that if you empower proactively then you may also visualize virtually. Think web-enabled. Think efficient. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "niches" really mean? We will redefine the aptitude of e-tailers to facilitate. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J++. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. We believe we know that if you extend intuitively then you may also enhance extensibly. Without paradigms, you will lack development. We here at Karei have come to know that it is better to utilize cyber-intuitively than to evolve dynamically. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think fractal. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry standard industry term "leading-edge, intuitive development compliance" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! If you expedite interactively, you may have to streamline strategically. We have come to know that it is better to engineer transparently than to brand super-efficiently. What does it really mean to implement "globally"?