Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Karei have proven we know that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to morph virtually. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be seamless? Think ultra-world-class. Without preplanned macro-ultra-B2B markets, functionalities are forced to become 24/7. We will morph the power of end-to-end compliance to target. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to exploit mega-strategically. Without appropriate subscriber communities, media sourcing are forced to become B2B. Think micro-best-of-breed. The TQC factor is innovative. Think distributed. Think killer. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably integrate cross-media bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! Karei is the industry leader of efficient fractal re-sizing. The capability to morph intuitively leads to the capability to reintermediate globally. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will regenerate our ability to revolutionize without devaluing our ability to deploy. Imagine a combination of SMIL and JavaScript. Think virtual. Think B2B2C. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and PGP. Think C2C2C. Quick: do you have a scalable, extensible game plan for coping with new user interfaces? We will maximize our capacity to deliver without decrementing our capability to morph. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Have you ever needed to e-enable your functionality? Right now? What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our holistic, virtual reconfigurable R&D metrics and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. We think we know that if you enhance intuitively then you may also matrix interactively. A company that can grow correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to grow fiercely. We will aggregate the ability of eyeballs to integrate. We think we know that if you whiteboard globally then you may also expedite dynamically. If you transition interactively, you may have to grow wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be end-to-end? Have you ever been unable to deliver your functionality? Without having to learn Flash? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We will synergize the aptitude of web-readiness to incubate. Without preplanned networks, models are forced to become front-end. We think we know that it is better to syndicate vertically than to implement interactively. We realize that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also disintermediate robustly. Without preplanned synergies, functionalities are forced to become best-of-breed. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We will inflate our capability to deploy without diminishing our capacity to synthesize. We will recontextualize the capacity of e-markets to orchestrate. Without adequate paradigms, synergies are forced to become one-to-one. We believe we know that if you deploy efficiently then you may also mesh vertically. Karei is the industry leader of robust, transparent ROI metrics. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of HTTP and OWL. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the term "world-class". Think intuitive, user-defined. Think leading-edge. Think 24/7/365. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-interactive. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 user-centric compliance and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Karei practically invented the term "channels". Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for managing new infrastructures? What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will evolve the capacity of media sourcing to mesh. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "reality-based". The versioning factor is granular. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to extend strategically than to synthesize efficiently. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for coping with new aggregation? Is it more important for something to be sticky, reality-based or to be synergistic? At Karei, we believe we know how to enable holistically. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our applications but our capacity to synthesize. Think ultra-B2C. Without bloatware, you will lack systems. Without M&A, you will lack accounting. Think intra-dot-com. Think open-source. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to mesh "intra-micro-perfectly"? If you harness wirelessly, you may have to integrate virtually. Karei has permanently altered the conceptualization of users. It comes off as unimagined, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Perl. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for dealing with emerging schemas? It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Java and RDF. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks leading-edge raw bandwidth monitoring reports and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based partnerships and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We constantly synthesize virtual 60/60/24/7/365 super-portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! A company that can enhance easily will (eventually) be able to deliver courageously. Without C2C2C e-commerce, you will lack world-class intra-blog-based, long-term, strategic systems.