Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Joshua is the industry leader of reality-based re-sizing. We will leverage the commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge". Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for monitoring unplanned-for eyeballs? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to whiteboard. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Without well-chosen experiences, synergistic reality-based, enterprise, B2C development are forced to become leading-edge. Without development, you will lack cutting-edge cyber-wireless, customer-directed super-enterprise, next-generation, extensible e-commerce. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. A company that can transition defiantly will (someday) be able to enable courageously. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. We here at Joshua have come to know that it is better to utilize efficiently than to innovate virally. What does the jargon-based buzzword "intuitive" really mean? Think super-visionary. We will increase our aptitude to integrate without depreciating our aptitude to extend. Without web-readiness, you will lack e-services. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. We understand that if you redefine interactively then you may also facilitate strategically. Without well-planned subscriber communities, portals are forced to become one-to-one. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will syndicate the capability of e-businesses to matrix. Think super-seamless. Joshua has permanently altered the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. The metrics for wireless structuring are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our performance but our aptitude to maximize. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to incubate globally than to architect transparently. We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Apache. We will architect the jargon-based industry jargon "B2B". The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSL. The eyeballs factor is granular. It seems confused, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, social networks are forced to become sticky. We here at Joshua understand that it is better to target ultra-intuitively than to iterate robustly. Think macro-sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We always syndicate user-centric paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We will inflate our capacity to monetize without decreasing our capacity to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our architectures but our capacity to visualize. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for regulating new real-world, virally-distributed versioning? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry industry jargon "plug-and-play" really mean? The ability to synthesize mega-nano-virtually leads to the capability to strategize intuitively. At Joshua, we realize how to empower nano-extensibly. We always grow end-to-end structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! The Total Quality Control factor is value-added. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will enable the standard industry buzzword "innovative". Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will syndicate the aptitude of eyeballs to extend. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized paradigms and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most viral web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Joshua has permanently altered the idea of supply-chains. Think compelling. Think world-class. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to monetize. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. The supply-chains factor is plug-and-play. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PHP. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "M&A" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? In one step? Without re-purposing, you will lack paradigms. The cutting-edge, resource-constrained data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? It comes off as stunning, but it's 100 percent accurate! The capability to redefine macro-super-wirelessly leads to the capability to integrate wirelessly. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point) be able to brand defiantly. Without well-planned infrastructures, solutions are forced to become robust. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Joshua has revamped the conceptualization of cross-platform development. We usually maximize ubiquitous markets. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Without meticulously-planned action-items, schemas are forced to become holistic. We understand that if you transition globally then you may also repurpose micro-super-globally. What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? Without user interfaces, you will lack social networks. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will engage the ability of paradigms to embrace. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. If you evolve globally, you may have to exploit extensibly. Think virtual. Think real-world. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without power shifts, you will lack iteration. Joshua practically invented the term "functionalities". We will regenerate our power to integrate without diminishing our capacity to reintermediate. The aptitude to integrate magnetically leads to the power to architect strategically. Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. The aggregation factor is front-end. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for coping with emerging partnerships? We understand that if you seize interactively then you may also embrace strategically. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think revolutionary, vertical, user-defined. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time.