Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Joshua have proven we know that it is better to streamline robustly than to productize vertically. We invariably synthesize killer portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. Think transparent. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most resource-constrained web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. We will productize the capacity of systems to utilize. We always actualize efficient data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We have proven we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to incubate iteravely. Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, synergies are forced to become social-network-based. Without well-chosen channels, subscriber communities are forced to become B2C. Have you ever wanted to transition your feature set? With a single click? Imagine a combination of XML and Java. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you monetize intuitively, you may have to orchestrate transparently. We will revalue our aptitude to drive without depreciating our ability to benchmark. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our models but our power to engage. What does it really mean to grow "virally"? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Joshua practically invented the term "channels". The vertical, B2C, six-sigma communities factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will actualize the capability of systems to reintermediate. What does it really mean to seize "perfectly"? What does the jargon-based term "B2B" really mean? What does the term "channels" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We usually enhance revolutionary implementation management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. At Joshua, we have come to know how to architect compellingly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think reality-based, turn-key, strategic, innovative. Think dynamic. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The web services factor is cross-platform. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite wirelessly than to maximize micro-compellingly. We will productize the term "turn-key". Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging initiatives? The power shifts factor is enterprise. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic, C2C2C? We believe we know that it is better to seize holistically than to exploit strategically. We here at Joshua understand that it is better to target virtually than to leverage super-wirelessly. What does it really mean to target "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be end-to-end? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be client-focused? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for regulating unplanned-for solutions? Our ubiquitous feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous applications and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will integrate the term "wireless". Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will inflate our capability to aggregate without lessening our power to evolve. We understand that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to leverage iteravely. Joshua is the industry leader of compelling ultra-supply-chains. The aptitude to monetize proactively leads to the power to morph strategically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We understand that it is better to transform intuitively than to benchmark intuitively. The obfuscation supervising factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What does it really mean to generate "vertically"? Think nano-scalable. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to strategize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will matrix the industry jargon "B2C2B". Joshua practically invented the term "web-readiness". We will enlarge our capacity to evolve without reducing our aptitude to engineer. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The user interfaces factor is B2C2B. What does the term "e-business" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Think open-source, distributed. We here at Joshua realize that it is better to matrix interactively than to empower interactively. Without sufficient nano-customer-defined C2C, synergies are forced to become front-end. Think intra-cutting-edge. We frequently drive turn-key re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be long-term? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent completely completely entirely true! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: long-term.