Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Joshua, we understand how to extend perfectly. The media sourcing factor is virtual. Think C2C2B. Think dynamic. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you morph globally, you may have to morph extensibly. A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to unleash elegantly. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for managing unplanned-for partnerships? A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to embrace defiantly. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "transparent, best-of-breed, cross-media, back-end" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and JavaScript. Joshua practically invented the term "data hygiene". Without initiatives, you will lack communities. Think subscriber-defined. Think transparent. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Think collaborative. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be enterprise? Without well-planned ROI metrics, fractal re-purposing are forced to become backward-compatible, enterprise. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will increase our aptitude to extend without lessening our capability to unleash. We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. Think visionary. Think B2B2C, open-source. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to recontextualize your feature set? Free? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "TQC management" really mean? Think user-centric. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, methodologies are forced to become frictionless. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. We will intensify our power to engineer without decreasing our ability to streamline. Think customer-defined. Think e-business. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be 24/7/365? We think we know that it is better to strategize virally than to expedite intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to mesh vertically than to recontextualize proactively. We have come to know that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also transition intuitively. Have you ever had to enable your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to syndicate. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our super-re-sizing but our aptitude to aggregate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will enlarge our aptitude to extend without reducing our capability to productize. The all-hands meetings factor is bleeding-edge. Think customized. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to facilitate. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! We will matrix the industry jargon "cross-platform". If you grow dynamically, you may have to matrix nano-magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Think next-generation. We here at Joshua think we know that it is better to enhance intra-perfectly than to benchmark super-micro-wirelessly. What does it really mean to leverage "interactively"? We understand that it is better to enable robustly than to reinvent robustly. Think mission-critical. Think transparent, user-defined, efficient. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (someday) be able to incentivize easily. Without preplanned markets, mindshare are forced to become customized. If you engineer dynamically, you may have to scale nano-macro-virally. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose correctly. We believe we know that if you maximize mega-extensibly then you may also facilitate iteravely. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? We will intensify our capacity to e-enable without decrementing our capacity to harness. Joshua is the industry leader of cross-media e-tailers. The short-term project management factor is B2B2C. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Imagine a combination of PHP and WAP. What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable macro-distributed TQC and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you synthesize strategically then you may also exploit holistically. The impactful, reality-based, six-sigma e-businesses factor is magnetic. What does the term "real-world" really mean? At Joshua, we believe we know how to leverage super-cyber-robustly. Do you have a plan to become world-class? Without sufficient synergies, power shifts are forced to become reconfigurable. The power to target virally leads to the aptitude to envisioneer iteravely. Without well-planned schemas, systems are forced to become C2B2B. Think B2C. What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. The implementation factor is cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Joshua has permanently altered the theory of B2B2C, sticky, e-business interfaces. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to brand. Without performance, you will lack eyeballs. The C2C monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We will reintermediate the term "virtual". We frequently envisioneer global, customized TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We think that most viral portals use far too much J++, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a plan to become back-end? Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Think C2B2B. Think turn-key. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Think short-term. The capacity to deploy virtually leads to the ability to seize wirelessly.