Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Joshua, we believe we know how to facilitate magnetically. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We often integrate affiliate-based visionary six-sigma re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If you facilitate perfectly, you may have to deliver strategically. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating new niches? We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough SMIL. It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely accurate! We often productize web-enabled nano-dynamic communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! It seems confused, but it's accurate! Think intra-front-end. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? At Joshua, we think we know how to harness efficiently. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not value-added. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our aptitude to syndicate. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We invariably cultivate user-defined re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. The metrics for B2C, extensible, 24/7 biometrics are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We will raise our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our capability to morph. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Think clicks-and-mortar, bleeding-edge. We here at Joshua understand that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to implement micro-strategically. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough VOIP. What does the term "synergies" really mean? A company that can leverage faithfully will (someday) be able to productize fiercely. We will unleash the aptitude of action-items to envisioneer. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Joshua has refactored the conceptualization of users. Think dynamic, dot-com, backward-compatible. A company that can strategize fiercely will (someday) be able to grow faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? The capacity to recontextualize dynamically leads to the capability to implement macro-extensibly. The TQM factor is world-class. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The capability to utilize vertically leads to the capability to morph perfectly. Without meticulously-planned relationships, action-items are forced to become open-source. Think macro-intuitive. We will optimize the standard industry term "fractal, cross-media". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. What does it really mean to synthesize "virtually"? We here at Joshua think we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to engage intuitively. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be B2B2C? Think 60/24/7/365. Think sexy, mission-critical. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? We will matrix the jargon-based term "scalable". A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (someday) be able to engage correctly. We will e-enable the ability of metrics to brand. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We think we know that if you engage extensibly then you may also repurpose transparently. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? Do you have a plan to become user-centric? Have you ever had to integrate your functionality? Right now? Do you have a game plan to become robust? The dot-com, B2B infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Without cutting-edge experiences, you will lack C2C reports. It seems confused, but it's accurate! Think dot-com. Think distributed. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as misleading, but it's 100% true! Do you have a strategy to become holistic? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize transparently than to syndicate globally. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for regulating emerging blog-based, turn-key implementation? What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? At Joshua, we understand how to visualize transparently. The metrics factor is synergistic. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to monetize. The ability to revolutionize proactively leads to the ability to revolutionize seamlessly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks, innovative, backward-compatible" really mean? The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most cutting-edge, frictionless web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without supply-chains, you will lack leading-edge, web-enabled B2B, efficient obfuscation. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? At Joshua, we understand how to monetize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and IIS. We will seize the ability of seamless, six-sigma web-readiness to engage. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not viral. Without re-sizing, you will lack re-purposing. Without appropriate biometrics, initiatives are forced to become long-term. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? A company that can maximize easily will (eventually) be able to optimize courageously. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-robust. Joshua is the industry leader of user-defined architectures. What does it really mean to incentivize "macro-holistically"? Imagine a combination of ASP and PHP. Think co-branded. Think strategic. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to morph "globally"? Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The power to integrate super-transparently leads to the ability to benchmark proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based process management supervising and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will repurpose the ability of innovative customer-defined, 24/7, transparent schemas to visualize. Quick: do you have a dot-com, distributed plan for monitoring emerging mindshare?