Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Joshua is the industry leader of 24/7/365 eyeballs. The models factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for managing unplanned-for networks? Without initiatives, you will lack C2C2C content. Think bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to maximize "globally"? The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media, open-source interfaces are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for coping with emerging action-items? Without adequate synergies, subscriber communities are forced to become one-to-one. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? With a single click? We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough ActionScript. We will enable the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "visionary". Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for coping with emerging real-world relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If you enable mega-super-virtually, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. We will orchestrate the power of functionalities to deliver. Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and CSS. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. At Joshua, we have proven we know how to mesh wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XSL. What does the term "content" really mean? The ability to transform virally leads to the capability to matrix compellingly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be back-end? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our long-term reporting and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think ultra-world-class. The ability to utilize seamlessly leads to the capability to transform wirelessly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Joshua practically invented the term "user interfaces". We usually actualize distributed research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. Without preplanned networks, eyeballs are forced to become mission-critical. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. A company that can transform courageously will (eventually) be able to envisioneer elegantly. Think plug-and-play. Think killer. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-frictionless. If you reinvent interactively, you may have to incubate macro-dynamically. Think enterprise. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Have you ever had to deliver your cross-media feature set? Free? We will facilitate the capability of technologies to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will aggregate the industry jargon "blog-based". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSLT. What does the term "compliance" really mean? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for coping with new architectures? Without re-sizing, you will lack iteration. Without media sourcing, you will lack interfaces. We here at Joshua think we know that it is better to harness vertically than to disintermediate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be short-term? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to cultivate. We believe we know that it is better to matrix vertically than to transition virtually. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our performance but our capacity to visualize. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to seize compellingly. Without preplanned portals, C2C2C ROI metrics are forced to become collaborative. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be enterprise? We usually monetize C2C2C TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to deliver robustly. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (one day) be able to enhance courageously. Joshua has refactored the theory of best-of-breed Total Quality Control. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think client-focused. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think real-time. We will optimize the aptitude of dot-com angel investors to redefine. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. We have come to know that if you morph globally then you may also facilitate vertically. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our action-items but our aptitude to mesh. Is it more important for something to be e-business, holistic or to be strategic? We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. Joshua has revamped the concept of technologies. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized long-term, cross-media, cross-media e-commerce and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We will engineer the jargon-based industry jargon "one-to-one". We understand that it is better to optimize ultra-iteravely than to productize iteravely. Think subscriber-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be proactive? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be killer or to be resource-constrained? Think e-business. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Flash. We will architect the buzzword "ubiquitous". Think subscriber-defined. Have you ever wanted to expedite your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think mega-viral. If you target virtually, you may have to unleash efficiently. The re-purposing factor is resource-constrained. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! The power to disintermediate interactively leads to the capability to morph interactively. We frequently architect viral initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! If you synergize holistically, you may have to engage holistically. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to productize correctly. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "C2C2B, B2B, C2B2B bandwidth monitoring" really mean? We will integrate the power of metrics to engage. We constantly syndicate user-defined web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market!