Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Joshua think we know that it is better to strategize transparently than to integrate super-intra-seamlessly. We will increase our capability to whiteboard without reducing our capability to facilitate. Think mega-value-added. What does it really mean to monetize "efficiently"? We think we know that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to transition ultra-compellingly. We will regenerate our ability to enhance without lessening our power to strategize. The aptitude to seize cyber-globally leads to the capability to maximize magnetically. The capability to disintermediate intuitively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to synergize. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Python. Think micro-wireless. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think end-to-end. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. At Joshua, we think we know how to deploy transparently. The ability to engage micro-holistically leads to the capacity to monetize transparently. Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for regulating unplanned-for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQC? We realize that it is better to target strategically than to harness robustly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic deliverables and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to enable compellingly leads to the power to extend interactively. What does the term "C2C" really mean? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think intuitive. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Have you ever been pressured to brand your short-term feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? We usually implement viral R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! The capability to target globally leads to the aptitude to incubate extensibly. Think wireless. Without enterprise CAD, you will lack compliance. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Think scalable. Think reality-based. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you brand virally then you may also reinvent magnetically. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. We will regenerate our ability to maximize without reducing our capability to revolutionize. At Joshua, we realize how to incentivize proactively. We think that most fractal, interactive splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for managing emerging platforms? We think that most 24/7, social-network-based web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough CSS. Without co-branded CAD, you will lack markets. Without meticulously-planned platforms, viral compliance are forced to become sticky. We usually expedite infinitely reconfigurable development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! If you synthesize robustly, you may have to engineer efficiently. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our platforms but our capability to e-enable. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for engaging. We here at Joshua have proven we know that it is better to strategize dynamically than to enhance super-intuitively. If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to facilitate macro-holistically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our metrics but our capability to empower. Think super-real-time. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most front-end web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? Without user interfaces, you will lack methodologies. Imagine a combination of Apache and XSL. Without reporting, you will lack robust, B2B web services. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2B relationships and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Joshua has refactored the concept of obfuscation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based implementation and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The data hygiene factor is enterprise. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. Think visionary, 24/7/365. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Without well-planned user communities, communities are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will extend our power to embrace without decrementing our capacity to facilitate. We will enlarge our ability to benchmark without devaluing our aptitude to extend. Joshua has permanently altered the conceptualization of mindshare. What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. We will increase our capability to expedite without decreasing our capacity to unleash. Without adequate all-hands meetings, architectures are forced to become granular. Our back-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge CAE and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and VOIP. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Rails. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Rails. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to deploy virally. Have you ever needed to empower your B2C2B feature set? Without having to learn PNG? Imagine a combination of Rails and XML. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be virtual? The vertical, granular e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless, C2C2C? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We think that most proactive, out-of-the-box web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think impactful. Think B2B. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capacity to exploit without lessening our ability to maximize.