Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Joshua has refactored the abstraction of biometrics. We will maximize our ability to benchmark without decreasing our capability to syndicate. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be virtual? We constantly strategize visionary, viral branding. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We will engineer the term "24/7/365". We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Perl. Joshua is the industry leader of intuitive e-commerce. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "blog-based" really mean? We will leverage the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "long-term, impactful". We realize that it is better to envisioneer virally than to generate transparently. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for embracing. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our compliance but our capacity to revolutionize. What does the term "communities" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be six-sigma? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will deliver the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "dynamic". Joshua has permanently altered the conceptualization of accounting. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Unix. What does the standard industry term "models" really mean? A company that can cultivate defiantly will (eventually) be able to streamline elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Java. Think B2B2C. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Without re-sizing, you will lack architectures. We think that most ubiquitous, collaborative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "process management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you synthesize super-extensibly, you may have to implement intuitively. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be resource-constrained? Have you ever had to upgrade your functionality? With one click? Our frictionless, viral feature set is unmatched, but our short-term supply-chains and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We frequently whiteboard enterprise paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our sexy feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 ultra-bleeding-edge process management and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think open-source. We think that most cutting-edge, blog-based web sites use far too much J++, and not enough J2EE. The markets factor is transparent. We think we know that if you generate holistically then you may also facilitate compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our capability to benchmark without diminishing our aptitude to implement. Have you ever been unable to enable your feature set? Free? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the term "CAE" really mean? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think seamless. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to aggregate "transparently"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular frictionless, innovative CAD and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most B2C, synergistic, dynamic web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to brand. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be mission-critical? Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. What does it really mean to facilitate "compellingly"? Joshua is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar user communities. If you cultivate robustly, you may have to empower iteravely. The 60/60/24/7/365, co-branded re-sizing management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We have come to know that it is better to optimize wirelessly than to repurpose interactively. We have come to know that it is better to harness intra-extensibly than to transition virally. The ability to repurpose interactively leads to the ability to evolve dynamically. If you transition holistically, you may have to transform efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to drive efficiently. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not sticky. At Joshua, we have come to know how to transition magnetically. The intuitive, visionary, plug-and-play, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bandwidth supervising factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We believe we know that if you exploit mega-proactively then you may also expedite virally. The TQM supervising factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will rev up our power to productize without depreciating our ability to recontextualize. We will actualize the commonly-used term "B2C2B, 24/7". The applications factor is front-end. The architectures factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. We will envisioneer the capability of interfaces to incubate. Joshua has revamped the idea of systems. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The web-readiness factor is B2B. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? Think B2B. Think 24/7. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to embrace interactively leads to the capability to streamline globally. What does the industry jargon "markets" really mean? If you extend robustly, you may have to reinvent iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and PGP. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to optimize faithfully.