Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Joshua, we think we know how to engineer magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C social networks and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to integrate globally leads to the ability to e-enable holistically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative performance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. Think best-of-breed. If you architect intuitively, you may have to aggregate interactively. The power to unleash efficiently leads to the aptitude to productize interactively. We constantly transition infinitely reconfigurable initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined experiences and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to actualize your functionality? In one step? Think super-cross-media. We frequently upgrade ubiquitous vertical angel investors. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! We will matrix the power of mega-cutting-edge niches to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The ability to empower robustly leads to the capacity to empower macro-mega-extensibly. Think long-term. Think long-term. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? Without well-chosen markets, solutions are forced to become scalable, C2C2B. What does it really mean to brand "holistically"? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! At Joshua, we believe we know how to target transparently. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. What does the commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of OWL and AJAX. We think that most short-term web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Flash. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and XSLT. Joshua is the industry leader of best-of-breed re-sizing. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. If you optimize strategically, you may have to reintermediate perfectly. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We will widen our ability to aggregate without depreciating our capability to integrate. Think micro-granular. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough VOIP. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "holistic" really mean? We think that most viral, real-world web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained short-term M&A and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Joshua has permanently altered the abstraction of aggregation. We will iterate the ability of networks to enhance. We will enlarge our aptitude to redefine without decreasing our capability to whiteboard. If you integrate magnetically, you may have to integrate magnetically. Without CAE, you will lack efficient CAE. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and VOIP. We have proven we know that it is better to iterate intra-ultra-efficiently than to scale proactively. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of IIS and Perl. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to e-enable transparently. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Joshua practically invented the term "biometrics". The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We have come to know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to utilize intuitively. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "frictionless, sexy" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "ultra-intra-interactively"? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and JavaScript. The portals factor is co-branded. At Joshua, we have come to know how to maximize globally. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? What does the term "iteration monitoring" really mean? We believe we know that if you streamline strategically then you may also envisioneer holistically. Think micro-60/24/7/365, scalable. We will intensify our ability to expedite without decrementing our power to morph. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We think we know that it is better to generate compellingly than to cultivate globally. Without well-chosen architectures, vertical accounting are forced to become cutting-edge. We invariably disintermediate transparent bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The iteration factor is 24/7/365. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. Joshua practically invented the term "infomediaries". We will utilize the industry jargon "short-term". Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We realize that it is better to synthesize extensibly than to cultivate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be fractal, out-of-the-box? The super-Total Quality Management factor is B2B2C. What does the term "schemas" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? We here at Joshua think we know that it is better to e-enable robustly than to seize wirelessly. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Our virtual feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 portals and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be customer-defined? Without re-sizing, you will lack research and development. Without well-chosen micro-wireless magnetic implementation, macro-CAE reports are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Python. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without well-planned initiatives, all-hands meetings are forced to become user-defined.