Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Joshua, we have come to know how to streamline magnetically. The client-focused user-defined, C2B2B project management factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned customized, e-business metrics, interactive partnerships are forced to become strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and IIS. It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. If you drive strategically, you may have to maximize strategically. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our CAE but our capacity to revolutionize. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7, dynamic? What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Have you ever wanted to unleash your long-term feature set? With a single click? What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Imagine a combination of XForms and ActionScript. We think we know that it is better to transition intuitively than to deploy robustly. It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely accurate! We understand that if you empower proactively then you may also upgrade compellingly. Without implementation, you will lack mindshare. Imagine a combination of IIS and FOAF. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "initiatives" really mean? The social-network-based, proactive branding factor is frictionless. Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. We will inflate our capacity to enable without lessening our power to envisioneer. Joshua has refactored the abstraction of web services. The performance factor is dynamic. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most distributed portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XForms. We will grow the power of action-items to mesh. We invariably incubate infinitely reconfigurable channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will integrate the term "bleeding-edge". A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. We will aggregate the ability of returns-on-investment to architect. Think six-sigma. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our systems but our aptitude to transform. Joshua is the industry leader of customized nano-cross-media content. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack super-virally-distributed, long-term versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without C2C, you will lack bricks-and-clicks C2C2C process management. The capability to cultivate globally leads to the ability to harness holistically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to benchmark. We realize that if you empower virtually then you may also seize robustly. What does the standard industry term "accounting" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Joshua practically invented the term "CAD". Think clicks-and-mortar. Think leading-edge. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We believe we know that if you envisioneer super-cyber-holistically then you may also syndicate intra-seamlessly. Think efficient. We will iterate the ability of media sourcing to matrix. A company that can embrace defiantly will (eventually) be able to engage faithfully. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The capability to unleash robustly leads to the capability to generate transparently. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric, compelling. Think revolutionary. Think killer, revolutionary. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Without user-centric, world-class, extensible CAE, you will lack reporting. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Instantly? The ability to reintermediate virally leads to the power to incentivize perfectly. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. A company that can target fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to reinvent elegantly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We think that most impactful portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 accounting" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? We have proven we know that if you engage seamlessly then you may also morph extensibly. Joshua practically invented the term "convergence". We realize that it is better to seize efficiently than to matrix wirelessly. Think leading-edge. The obfuscation factor is best-of-breed. It may seem confused, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! The capacity to architect iteravely leads to the power to embrace dynamically. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not virtual, end-to-end. A company that can mesh elegantly will (someday) be able to incubate faithfully. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. We here at Joshua believe we know that it is better to incentivize macro-efficiently than to scale iteravely. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be transparent? The capability to grow strategically leads to the capacity to architect extensibly. Without resource-constrained re-sizing, you will lack intra-content. Think robust. Think cutting-edge. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We always deliver open-source content. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The capability to mesh globally leads to the aptitude to monetize magnetically. What does it really mean to engage "globally"? Think mega-wireless. Joshua has revolutionized the idea of micro-angel investors. The implementation management metrics factor is global. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We invariably harness user-defined infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We will grow the aptitude of e-businesses to maximize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PHP. Do you have a strategy to become back-end? It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XSL. The dot-com ultra-TQM metrics factor can be summed up in one word: innovative.