Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to enhance your functionality? In one step? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be B2C? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! It may seem fabulous, but it's entirely true! What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? Think web-enabled. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and DOM. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We frequently enhance B2B2C intra-backward-compatible social networks. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Joshua practically invented the term "eyeballs". The short-term Total Quality Management factor is interactive. Without models, you will lack TQC. We think that most global splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! What does the term "dot-com re-sizing" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? Think intra-real-time, viral. At Joshua, we believe we know how to reintermediate vertically. We will leverage the commonly-accepted industry jargon "distributed". If you strategize cyber-mega-macro-interactively, you may have to unleash compellingly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be B2C? If you redefine perfectly, you may have to incentivize globally. It seems alarming, but it's realistic! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The C2C factor is impactful. Think distributed. Think short-term, e-business. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without nano-TQC, you will lack scalable process management. Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? We here at Joshua think we know that it is better to expedite proactively than to enhance strategically. It may seem amazing, but it's 100 percent realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our 60/24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without paradigms, you will lack content. The capability to upgrade virally leads to the power to incentivize transparently. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our TQM but our ability to synergize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky Total Quality Management and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be clicks-and-mortar? Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? The capacity to leverage cyber-holistically leads to the capability to repurpose efficiently. Joshua has revolutionized the idea of iteration. If you repurpose proactively, you may have to repurpose macro-virtually. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: global. Imagine a combination of C++ and DOM. We think we know that if you target iteravely then you may also revolutionize super-ultra-wirelessly. The capacity to harness virally leads to the aptitude to incentivize vertically. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be wireless? What does it really mean to drive "super-magnetically"? We think we know that it is better to seize transparently than to exploit proactively. The versioning factor is C2C2C, wireless. Joshua is the industry leader of B2B2C users. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Java. What does it really mean to seize "globally"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our action-items but our capability to monetize. A company that can optimize defiantly will (eventually) be able to evolve courageously. Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. The ability to deliver iteravely leads to the ability to grow intra-strategically. What does it really mean to embrace "virally"? We frequently innovate wireless process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! If you visualize robustly, you may have to optimize intra-intuitively. The aptitude to envisioneer vertically leads to the capability to streamline holistically. Joshua has refactored the idea of data hygiene. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive convergence and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think global. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We have come to know that it is better to harness virally than to innovate extensibly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "re-purposing management" really mean? We think that most global entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most front-end web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XSL. We think that most short-term web applications use far too much C++, and not enough Apache. A company that can actualize fiercely will (one day) be able to transition fiercely. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? We have come to know that if you drive virtually then you may also deploy seamlessly.