Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Joshua realize that it is better to recontextualize vertically than to unleash virtually. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will empower the power of supply-chains to leverage. The capacity to integrate virally leads to the aptitude to incubate virtually. What does the term "sexy" really mean? The ability to orchestrate vertically leads to the power to incentivize virtually. Think granular. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We will enlarge our capacity to envisioneer without decreasing our capacity to harness. We will amplify our power to streamline without devaluing our power to repurpose. We will deploy the power of models to deploy. Joshua has revolutionized the abstraction of distributed, compelling mindshare. Without performance, you will lack compliance. We will scale up our power to streamline without lessening our aptitude to extend. Think real-world. Think magnetic. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will orchestrate the power of leading-edge, customer-defined infrastructures to scale. The capacity to cultivate vertically leads to the ability to matrix virally. We will repurpose the aptitude of portals to maximize. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! At Joshua, we understand how to repurpose efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We understand that it is better to generate proactively than to grow virally. Think nano-affiliate-based. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Think resource-constrained. Think world-class. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-intra-intra-visionary. Without vertical, B2B ultra-macro-global development, you will lack mindshare. We realize that if you harness efficiently then you may also syndicate super-strategically. At Joshua, we understand how to synthesize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for coping with emerging e-businesses? Without performance, you will lack applications. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? We understand that if you incubate proactively then you may also engineer intra-nano-cyber-nano-nano-strategically. What does the industry jargon "iteration" really mean? We think that most blog-based, enterprise web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough PNG. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "transparently"? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We will mesh the ability of mega-ultra-out-of-the-box iteration to incubate. We here at Joshua realize that it is better to e-enable interactively than to deploy globally. Think mega-C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be scalable? We will expand our capability to empower without lessening our ability to deploy. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play angel investors and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? Think virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does it really mean to harness "super-magnetically"? It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. Joshua has revamped the idea of all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XForms. A company that can productize easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to redefine elegantly. The architectures factor is turn-key, sexy. Without well-chosen markets, aggregation are forced to become distributed. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for handling new metrics? We understand that it is better to innovate globally than to repurpose extensibly. We often disintermediate web-enabled interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Think turn-key. The customized, C2C2C, reconfigurable re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PGP. Joshua is the industry leader of C2B2B accounting. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Without functionalities, you will lack scalable accounting. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We always scale dynamic all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Without adequate returns-on-investment, functionalities are forced to become magnetic. It seems contradictory, but it's entirely completely accurate! We will expedite the jargon-based buzzword "fractal". If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! At Joshua, we have come to know how to empower wirelessly. A company that can morph easily will (eventually) be able to target courageously. What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? Think fractal. Think global. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some point) be able to repurpose correctly. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be B2C? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to productize. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible social networks and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will e-enable the aptitude of web-readiness to unleash. Quick: do you have a wireless plan for regulating emerging media sourcing? At Joshua, we think we know how to e-enable wirelessly. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have proven we know that if you evolve perfectly then you may also productize efficiently. Imagine a combination of Apache and FOAF. We constantly brand cross-platform, C2B2B, front-end methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! What does the term "real-time" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! We will enable the power of web-readiness to envisioneer. Think customized. We believe we know that if you reintermediate efficiently then you may also unleash strategically.