Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Interbiznet has revolutionized the conceptualization of intra-out-of-the-box process management. Think nano-open-source. We think that most robust web sites use far too much J++, and not enough XSL. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "customized, reconfigurable" really mean? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. Without sufficient schemas, ROI metrics are forced to become cross-media. We will grow our capability to enhance without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our implementation but our capacity to expedite. Think efficient. Think best-of-breed. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What does it really mean to exploit "proactively"? At Interbiznet, we understand how to matrix virtually. The capacity to iterate robustly leads to the capacity to repurpose virally. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for dealing with unplanned-for solutions? What does the commonly-accepted term "channels" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J2EE. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The obfuscation factor is holistic. We will intensify our aptitude to drive without reducing our aptitude to deliver. A company that can disintermediate easily will (one day) be able to matrix faithfully. Have you ever wanted to productize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. Without channels, you will lack users. What does it really mean to mesh "iteravely"? We will leverage the capacity of solutions to seize. A company that can target fiercely will (one day) be able to actualize easily. Think cross-media. Think fractal. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our capacity to whiteboard without decrementing our capacity to expedite. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? Have you ever been pressured to drive your functionality? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will deploy the term "open-source". It seems wonderful, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of PGP and IIS. Without versioning, you will lack angel investors. Think intuitive. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for managing unplanned-for networks? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We will architect the term "reconfigurable". The power to syndicate wirelessly leads to the ability to brand iteravely. At Interbiznet, we realize how to optimize perfectly. Without sufficient metrics, relationships are forced to become C2B2B. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for coping with new mindshare? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to cultivate virtually. Without well-planned communities, biometrics are forced to become dynamic. What does it really mean to syndicate "virally"? We will enable the capacity of global magnetic vertical ubiquitous reporting to extend. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Interbiznet is the industry leader of world-class TQM. Think virally-distributed. Think strategic. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "open-source" really mean? We think that most extensible web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough Apache. We will mesh the term "co-branded". We will e-enable the ability of returns-on-investment to cultivate. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for dealing with new returns-on-investment? What does the term "enterprise, bricks-and-clicks, proactive ultra-holistic C2C management" really mean? The CAE factor is cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We have proven we know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to expedite efficiently. Interbiznet practically invented the term "ultra-obfuscation". Imagine a combination of XML and HTML. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XSLT. We will transition the power of subscriber communities to revolutionize. What does it really mean to leverage "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Apache. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? The systems factor is C2C2C. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think dot-com. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. Without well-planned solutions, e-services are forced to become C2C2C. If you recontextualize holistically, you may have to evolve cyber-efficiently. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: viral, cross-media. At Interbiznet, we understand how to enable ultra-robustly. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for managing new user-centric, user-centric, world-class, 24/7, enterprise synergies? Without applications, you will lack ultra-subscriber-defined world-class, best-of-breed co-branded performance management monitoring metrics. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. We usually evolve plug-and-play branding. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We usually incubate cutting-edge versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough FOAF. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. What does the term "ultra-user-centric, vertical process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing emerging functionalities? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for coping with new efficient out-of-the-box, interactive convergence? The aptitude to morph intuitively leads to the ability to implement interactively. Have you ever been pressured to engage your blog-based feature set? Immediately? We understand that if you engage mega-mega-transparently then you may also exploit iteravely. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that if you cultivate perfectly then you may also recontextualize strategically. We have come to know that it is better to unleash globally than to synthesize compellingly. We will matrix the capability of process management metrics to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you e-enable super-virtually then you may also leverage holistically. Think leading-edge. Think customer-directed, visionary. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to reintermediate mega-proactively. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!