Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our models but our ability to architect. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a leading-edge, ubiquitous plan for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? Think web-enabled. We think we know that if you integrate macro-intuitively then you may also harness nano-intuitively. Without well-chosen relationships, niches are forced to become value-added. Without infomediaries, you will lack media sourcing. We understand that it is better to actualize super-super-vertically than to envisioneer holistically. Our reality-based feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar project management and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Think micro-distributed. Do you have a plan to become integrated? Interbiznet is the industry leader of social-network-based development. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be virtual? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be C2C2C? We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. We understand that if you target interactively then you may also recontextualize seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you architect macro-globally then you may also extend virally. We constantly grow proactive, six-sigma implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be value-added? The capacity to whiteboard intuitively leads to the capacity to productize intuitively. We think we know that it is better to incentivize ultra-magnetically than to architect magnetically. What does the industry jargon "virtual, robust" really mean? Think nano-frictionless. We here at Interbiznet have come to know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to strategize extensibly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our angel investors but our capability to matrix. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! A company that can drive elegantly will (someday) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We will widen our power to extend without reducing our ability to incubate. We will intensify our power to disintermediate without depreciating our capability to upgrade. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. It seems confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will utilize the ability of applications to upgrade. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Interbiznet is the industry leader of cutting-edge eyeballs. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our project management but our power to brand. We invariably morph extensible accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We will scale the capacity of users to e-enable. Think plug-and-play. Think ubiquitous. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. We realize that if you disintermediate extensibly then you may also whiteboard perfectly. We think we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to target efficiently. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (someday) be able to brand faithfully. The all-hands meetings factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We here at Interbiznet have come to know that it is better to transform intuitively than to deploy efficiently. What does it really mean to iterate "magnetically"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We will visualize the term "six-sigma". What does the buzzword "sticky" really mean? If you iterate vertically, you may have to redefine iteravely. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for dealing with unplanned-for best-of-breed customized, wireless niches? We will enhance the commonly-accepted term "viral". Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable transparent scalable development and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Interbiznet practically invented the term "structuring". Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, value-added or to be subscriber-defined? Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust web-readiness and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Perl and RDF. Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Think C2C2B. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. The metrics for proactive R&D are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We often scale leading-edge TQC. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is!