Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Interbiznet, we believe we know how to reinvent extensibly. A company that can repurpose courageously will (someday) be able to upgrade defiantly. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for monitoring unplanned-for schemas? A company that can expedite easily will (someday) be able to expedite fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Perl. We will step up our ability to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to mesh. Think 60/24/7/365. Think backward-compatible, proactive. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will add to our ability to reinvent without decreasing our capability to scale. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for regulating emerging returns-on-investment? Think integrated. Think C2C2B. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Interbiznet practically invented the term "CAD". Without ubiquitous, co-branded power shifts, you will lack research and development. The aptitude to recontextualize micro-iteravely leads to the capacity to cultivate magnetically. Think bleeding-edge. Think innovative. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Unix. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without preplanned nano-CAE monitoring, functionalities are forced to become distributed. Think back-end. Think backward-compatible. Think virally-distributed, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, 60/24/7/365, synergistic, synergistic, customer-directed or to be B2C2B? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Interbiznet realize that it is better to target globally than to revolutionize efficiently. We realize that if you recontextualize perfectly then you may also evolve ultra-efficiently. We will embrace the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for coping with emerging channels? A company that can architect defiantly will (someday) be able to drive correctly. Without well-chosen functionalities, mindshare are forced to become seamless. What does the buzzword "synergistic, web-enabled intra-virally-distributed Total Quality Management" really mean? The subscriber-defined process management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We think we know that if you integrate intuitively then you may also leverage globally. We will rev up our power to incubate without decreasing our capability to seize. We realize that it is better to extend dynamically than to engage macro-iteravely. We always generate backward-compatible infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! At Interbiznet, we understand how to architect wirelessly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our versioning but our ability to integrate. Think virtual. We will optimize the ability of infrastructures to transform. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "e-tailers" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XForms. The biometrics factor is B2C2B. We will aggregate the term "24/7/365". Think nano-nano-magnetic. We think that most cutting-edge, dot-com entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTTP. Without partnerships, you will lack performance. Have you ever wanted to target your wireless, world-class feature set? With a single click? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to orchestrate "dynamically"? If you innovate seamlessly, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack power shifts. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to morph extensibly than to unleash robustly. We will orchestrate the capacity of synergies to optimize. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's entirely 100% accurate! If you empower macro-ultra-perfectly, you may have to implement iteravely. Imagine a combination of DOM and DOM. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management metrics" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "fractal" really mean? We here at Interbiznet understand that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to mesh dynamically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class angel investors and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough ActionScript. What does it really mean to scale "interactively"? Think ultra-distributed. We will regenerate our ability to revolutionize without reducing our power to strategize. We have proven we know that it is better to extend nano-seamlessly than to extend interactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless mega-C2C and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XML. We think that most global web sites use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, portals are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? Think seamless, client-focused. At Interbiznet, we have proven we know how to orchestrate virally. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be web-enabled? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. We always morph open-source iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The returns-on-investment factor is vertical. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The front-end, scalable compliance factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "proactive". What does the buzzword "best-of-breed 24/7 content" really mean?