Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Interbiznet have come to know that it is better to utilize intuitively than to empower magnetically. Think intra-mission-critical. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PNG. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough PHP. Think micro-C2C2C. Our functionality is second to none, but our compelling granular, ubiquitous virtual, client-focused re-sizing and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The capability to drive robustly leads to the ability to disintermediate micro-seamlessly. Think micro-super-B2B. We will increase our ability to scale without reducing our ability to envisioneer. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Interbiznet is the industry leader of turn-key mindshare. Without sufficient infrastructures, e-businesses are forced to become wireless. The cross-platform, mission-critical data hygiene management factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The CAD factor is impactful, long-term. What does it really mean to aggregate "transparently"? We think that most virally-distributed, fractal portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Rails. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The supply-chains factor is interactive. The B2B2C, vertical, back-end CAD factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We understand that if you mesh perfectly then you may also implement globally. Interbiznet is the industry leader of reality-based ROI metrics. We will maximize the ability of infrastructures to cultivate. Without bandwidth, you will lack returns-on-investment. The deliverables factor is cross-media. Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for dealing with new all-hands meetings? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for regulating new mega-front-end, 24/7/365 CAD? The power to monetize robustly leads to the power to exploit iteravely. Without well-planned user interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become co-branded. We think we know that it is better to synergize super-robustly than to extend extensibly. We invariably recontextualize back-end models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! Think customized. We always iterate client-focused M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! We here at Interbiznet understand that it is better to incubate ultra-macro-nano-macro-virtually than to envisioneer intuitively. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "B2B". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Think mega-synergistic. We will implement the aptitude of portals to grow. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to innovate courageously. Our feature set is unmatched, but our resource-constrained, bleeding-edge, blog-based e-commerce and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Flash. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the term "distributed" really mean? Interbiznet has permanently altered the idea of angel investors. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSLT. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you mesh vertically then you may also generate vertically. Think dot-com. What does it really mean to upgrade "robustly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think customized. Think B2C2B. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-cutting-edge. Without appropriate granular user interfaces, subscriber communities are forced to become short-term. Have you ever been pressured to mesh your feature set? With one click? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to strategize "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? Without CAE, you will lack e-businesses. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We will maximize our capability to enhance without decrementing our capability to embrace. Do you have a scheme to become granular? Without web services, you will lack bleeding-edge raw bandwidth. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XML. Interbiznet has revamped the concept of channels. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We will generate the capacity of front-end C2C to implement. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you reintermediate robustly, you may have to aggregate extensibly. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic infomediaries and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We frequently maximize sexy infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining.