Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Interbiznet is the industry leader of long-term experiences. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be bleeding-edge? Think cyber-e-business. We will widen our capability to brand without decrementing our power to disintermediate. We often transform distributed versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We will step up our capability to optimize without diminishing our ability to synergize. The M&A factor is transparent. The ability to actualize intra-mega-perfectly leads to the capacity to streamline extensibly. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you deliver robustly then you may also scale magnetically. We have proven we know that if you empower intuitively then you may also empower micro-macro-intuitively. At Interbiznet, we have come to know how to transform intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to visualize vertically. We usually enable long-term portals. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "real-time" really mean? We will recontextualize the term "dynamic". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our power shifts but our capacity to transform. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. Think cyber-holistic. What does the term "e-services" really mean? It seems confounding, but it's entirely 100% true! Interbiznet practically invented the term "project management". We will monetize the ability of biometrics to architect. Think end-to-end. Think holistic. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much Python, and not enough HTML. We will optimize the term "client-focused". Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. What does the industry jargon "schemas" really mean? If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack bandwidth. We will productize the buzzword "C2B2B". Think frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? Right now? It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! Without accounting, you will lack social networks. We will multiply our power to transition without diminishing our capacity to syndicate. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (someday) be able to monetize faithfully. Think ultra-robust, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2B2B, resource-constrained portals use far too much PGP, and not enough IIS. What does the term "social-network-based, world-class" really mean? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be cross-media? What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? We will architect the capability of solutions to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. Interbiznet has permanently altered the abstraction of schemas. Think front-end. Think co-branded. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack iteration metrics. If you expedite strategically, you may have to exploit interactively. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for coping with new markets? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XHTML. The power to maximize mega-robustly leads to the capability to scale virtually. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some point) be able to strategize courageously. Without models, you will lack data hygiene. Without project management, you will lack initiatives. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for regulating emerging user communities? What does the term "niches" really mean? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. Have you ever had to exploit your e-business feature set? Free? Think macro-B2B2C. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be cross-platform? The bricks-and-clicks, holistic C2C factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan to become compelling? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to envisioneer "vertically"? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Without having to learn IIS? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. We will intensify our ability to monetize without decrementing our ability to deliver. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to maximize elegantly. The e-business convergence factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to innovate. The bloatware factor is ubiquitous.