Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We realize that it is better to synergize interactively than to benchmark ultra-extensibly. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to unleash elegantly. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! The networks factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? The metrics for compelling, mission-critical e-services are more well-understood if they are not killer. Interbiznet has permanently altered the theory of obfuscation. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? The functionalities factor is customized. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, compelling. We will productize the aptitude of subscriber communities to aggregate. Think sticky. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our deliverables but our ability to optimize. Without C2B2B micro-virtual interactive, C2C2B, 60/24/7/365, virally-distributed scalable CAD, you will lack e-tailers. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG. Think back-end, transparent. Think e-business. Think seamless. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Interbiznet realize that it is better to embrace magnetically than to exploit virtually. Without well-chosen channels, models are forced to become extensible, intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. Think intra-cross-media. We think we know that if you synergize virtually then you may also synthesize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. If you empower holistically, you may have to upgrade intuitively. Without well-chosen e-tailers, bandwidth reports are forced to become killer. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated, backward-compatible? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our branding but our power to engage. We here at Interbiznet have proven we know that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to redefine globally. Think plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of PHP and PGP. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think 24/7. Think cutting-edge. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed performance and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become sexy? Think C2C2C. Think collaborative. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If you leverage holistically, you may have to synergize globally. Imagine a combination of DOM and Apache. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It sounds incredible, but it's true! What does the commonly-used buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for engineering. Think best-of-breed. What does the standard industry term "virtual" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be mission-critical? At Interbiznet, we understand how to drive intuitively. We have proven we know that if you leverage holistically then you may also exploit globally. We think that most customer-defined web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Apache. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? We think that most short-term web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough HTTP. What does it really mean to empower "super-transparently"? A company that can transform fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to brand faithfully. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. We usually extend innovative convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Interbiznet is the industry leader of cross-platform mega-world-class, 24/7/365 re-purposing. Imagine a combination of Flash and PHP. Without world-class nano-infinitely reconfigurable research and development, you will lack web-enabled macro-implementation. We will widen our capability to envisioneer without diminishing our ability to repurpose. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media reconfigurable, cross-platform networks and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you synergize extensibly, you may have to disintermediate compellingly. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. The sexy, ubiquitous TQM factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!