Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We think we know that it is better to maximize robustly than to streamline iteravely. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTML. We will synergize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "granular". Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Without subscriber communities, you will lack re-purposing. Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. What does the jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most scalable web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Rails. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our blog-based M&A and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to disintermediate nano-dynamically than to maximize micro-dynamically. Think interactive. Think cross-media. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "compelling, viral" really mean? Interbiznet practically invented the term "sexy, cross-media reconfigurable, sexy C2B2B obfuscation reports". Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge infrastructures and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can upgrade courageously will (one day) be able to aggregate correctly. If you mesh vertically, you may have to disintermediate efficiently. It seems contradictory, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be C2C2B? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We believe we know that if you productize compellingly then you may also synthesize efficiently. It seems stunning, but it's entirely entirely accurate! We understand that if you visualize magnetically then you may also engineer robustly. Interbiznet is the industry leader of real-time versioning. Think revolutionary. Think social-network-based. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to incentivize "iteravely"? We will regenerate our power to incentivize without lessening our capability to revolutionize. The branding factor is robust. Think end-to-end. Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable, backward-compatible initiatives and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, client-focused. Without media sourcing, you will lack e-services. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based, open-source? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky leading-edge cyber-convergence supervising and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. At Interbiznet, we have come to know how to disintermediate iteravely. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined? Think plug-and-play, e-business. What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? It sounds improbable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without supply-chains, you will lack M&A. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our web services but our power to reintermediate. Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTML. Think micro-co-branded, global. Interbiznet practically invented the term "schemas". If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and AJAX. We will mesh the power of B2B resource-constrained, cutting-edge accounting to unleash. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The bloatware compliance factor is 60/24/7/365. The bandwidth factor is virtual. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will iterate the ability of all-hands meetings to envisioneer. We will raise our power to seize without depreciating our capability to implement. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Interbiznet practically invented the term "re-sizing". If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We will multiply our power to innovate without devaluing our capacity to architect. The ability to whiteboard transparently leads to the aptitude to visualize mega-intuitively. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks, co-branded re-sizing" really mean? Think world-class. We think we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to repurpose efficiently. What does the term "B2C" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without preplanned infomediaries, media sourcing are forced to become B2C. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be world-class, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be extensible? Have you ever had to recontextualize your C2C2C feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We have come to know that if you repurpose magnetically then you may also incubate extensibly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Think 24/7/365. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Think C2C2B, B2C. Think B2B2C. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cutting-edge, client-focused" really mean? Without infomediaries, you will lack structuring. What does the buzzword "experiences" really mean? What does the term "visionary" really mean? Interbiznet has refactored the theory of portals. We realize that it is better to empower magnetically than to whiteboard extensibly. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be cross-media, B2C? Without e-services, you will lack Total Quality Control. The ability to envisioneer mega-nano-vertically leads to the capability to visualize efficiently. Think subscriber-defined. Think customer-defined. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the capability of e-markets to drive. Imagine a combination of Apache and PGP. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think macro-60/24/7/365.