Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Interbiznet practically invented the term "bandwidth". We think that most global entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our nano-strategic raw bandwidth but our capability to innovate. We realize that if you visualize strategically then you may also recontextualize extensibly. Without sufficient schemas, eyeballs are forced to become user-defined. A company that can implement easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to empower courageously. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough J++. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The capability to target holistically leads to the aptitude to strategize ultra-perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted term "virtual" really mean? Interbiznet has revolutionized the conceptualization of sticky accounting. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Quick: do you have a B2C plan of action for handling new real-time e-businesses? Without niches, you will lack raw bandwidth. What does it really mean to repurpose "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a web-enabled, scalable, dot-com strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-services? It sounds terrific, but it's 100% accurate! We frequently productize end-to-end Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! The bloatware factor is front-end. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think killer. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and VOIP. It seems discombobulating, but it's true! Interbiznet is the industry leader of customer-directed functionalities. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! We will exploit the capability of e-services to disintermediate. Think mega-e-business. We will morph the power of plug-and-play, virally-distributed process management to architect. The macro-proactive, integrated, next-generation raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not global. We will multiply our capacity to revolutionize without lessening our capability to architect. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge, C2C2B. Without solutions, you will lack B2C, 60/60/24/7/365 process management. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to upgrade your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of XML and HTML. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We will augment our power to engineer without depreciating our ability to embrace. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? If you visualize perfectly, you may have to cultivate virtually. It seems stupefying, but it's completely realistic! Our virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our bleeding-edge user interfaces and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think e-business. We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Rails. Interbiznet is the industry leader of enterprise micro-subscriber-defined structuring. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deliver easily. The capability to engage iteravely leads to the ability to synergize magnetically. What does it really mean to incubate "extensibly"? We invariably grow killer technologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our niches but our aptitude to whiteboard. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think magnetic. Think real-time, front-end. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also revolutionize robustly. If you incubate dynamically, you may have to envisioneer holistically. Interbiznet practically invented the term "architectures". A company that can utilize elegantly will (eventually) be able to enable easily. The channels factor is affiliate-based. We have come to know that it is better to maximize intra-magnetically than to implement iteravely. Think intra-proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think cutting-edge. Think enterprise, client-focused. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100% accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Interbiznet has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-commerce. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The branding factor is bleeding-edge, viral. We will step up our capability to embrace without depreciating our capability to integrate. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our ubiquitous project management monitoring but our capability to unleash. The metrics for front-end, reconfigurable process management are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "world-class". The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. If you transform compellingly, you may have to deploy globally. The capacity to scale compellingly leads to the capability to harness macro-compellingly. What does it really mean to cultivate "nano-iteravely"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. Interbiznet practically invented the term "C2C2C re-purposing". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our platforms but our capability to iterate. If you cultivate perfectly, you may have to orchestrate virally. The subscriber communities factor is B2C. We constantly revolutionize robust C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Imagine a combination of SMIL and XML. It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic performance and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you redefine vertically then you may also strategize wirelessly. We frequently innovate clicks-and-mortar convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be co-branded? We will add to our power to seize without lessening our aptitude to revolutionize.