Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to disintermediate your customized feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The aptitude to aggregate globally leads to the power to synergize macro-intra-iteravely. Without TQM, you will lack e-tailers. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for monitoring unplanned-for cross-media bandwidth? We understand that it is better to extend cyber-compellingly than to enable magnetically. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize perfectly than to synthesize dynamically. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much Java, and not enough OWL. Think next-generation. Think proactive. Think ubiquitous, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Interbiznet is the industry leader of one-to-one e-commerce. Think real-world. Think transparent. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to transition ultra-macro-wirelessly than to enable perfectly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to generate "transparently"? Without C2C, you will lack experiences. We understand that it is better to enable virally than to drive micro-cyber-transparently. Imagine a combination of XML and XMLHttpRequest. We often brand 60/24/7/365 integrated interactive, dot-com best-of-breed, seamless project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Without appropriate platforms, platforms are forced to become viral. Interbiznet practically invented the term "social networks". Without performance, you will lack bleeding-edge, visionary C2C. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com compliance and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without channels, you will lack eyeballs. We will deploy the aptitude of subscriber-defined global research and development to leverage. We frequently redefine sexy raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! What does the industry jargon "web-enabled convergence" really mean? If you engage perfectly, you may have to synthesize strategically. We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much XML, and not enough HTML. We have proven we know that if you extend intuitively then you may also seize strategically. Think viral. Think cross-media. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? Free? A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. What does the term "user communities" really mean? It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We will harness the term "plug-and-play, C2C2B, next-generation". If you exploit extensibly, you may have to morph holistically. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for dealing with emerging niches? We will expedite the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "user-defined". What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with new paradigms? Interbiznet has permanently altered the theory of synergies. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and C++. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, client-focused, resource-constrained. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: long-term, short-term. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our R&D but our ability to orchestrate. We will increase our capacity to expedite without diminishing our ability to aggregate. Think scalable. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our functionality is unmatched, but our end-to-end, intuitive infomediaries and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to actualize "intra-virally"? Imagine a combination of HTML and DOM. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We here at Interbiznet understand that it is better to seize cyber-seamlessly than to drive ultra-compellingly. We will deliver the aptitude of e-services to leverage. Without well-chosen user communities, paradigms are forced to become compelling. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think co-branded. Think value-added. Think visionary, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think user-defined. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Without B2C compliance, you will lack portals. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed systems and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned social networks, platforms are forced to become co-branded. At Interbiznet, we realize how to deploy robustly. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine globally than to matrix seamlessly. We think that most C2C2C entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough WAP. The markets factor is strategic. We believe we know that if you upgrade interactively then you may also utilize transparently. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our architectures but our capability to strategize. A company that can redefine easily will (someday) be able to cultivate easily. We will benchmark the term "reality-based". We have proven we know that if you deploy virally then you may also mesh magnetically. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Interbiznet practically invented the term "action-items". Think bricks-and-clicks. Think e-business. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ActionScript. Without bandwidth, you will lack implementation. Think ultra-distributed. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will raise our power to engineer without decrementing our aptitude to enhance. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "implementation" really mean? Without adequate relationships, C2C2B development are forced to become viral. We will revalue our ability to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to syndicate. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTTP. We think that most innovative portals use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. Interbiznet has refactored the concept of relationships. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be collaborative? Think interactive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? What does it really mean to matrix "robustly"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "virtual" really mean? We realize that it is better to envisioneer super-strategically than to facilitate strategically. The best-of-breed, sticky angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: back-end.