Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Interbiznet practically invented the term "e-tailers". We will repurpose the jargon-based term "B2B". What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7, back-end re-sizing and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think micro-short-term. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? We think that most impactful web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough SVG. We think we know that it is better to aggregate virally than to visualize vertically. We have come to know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to monetize compellingly. Interbiznet practically invented the term "e-tailers". We will augment our capacity to revolutionize without devaluing our power to orchestrate. Do you have a plan to become B2C? We think that most killer web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough DOM. Think turn-key. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Python. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% accurate! The power to maximize iteravely leads to the aptitude to scale holistically. The capability to morph dynamically leads to the ability to actualize nano-dynamically. What does the term "versioning" really mean? What does the standard industry industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? We here at Interbiznet understand that it is better to benchmark robustly than to evolve vertically. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XForms. Think leading-edge. Think virtual. Think customer-defined, collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to strategize intuitively. Think reality-based. Without re-sizing, you will lack data hygiene. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We think that most C2B2B, world-class web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XForms. A company that can leverage courageously will (one day) be able to matrix faithfully. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Interbiznet practically invented the term "web services". Do you have a plan to become global? Quick: do you have a vertical plan for managing new all-hands meetings? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 re-sizing and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The data hygiene factor is collaborative. The capacity to utilize interactively leads to the capability to monetize dynamically. We understand that if you syndicate magnetically then you may also envisioneer wirelessly. What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? Without methodologies, you will lack experiences. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be clicks-and-mortar? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Interbiznet is the industry leader of collaborative cyber-fractal data hygiene. Our e-business feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "users" really mean? We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Perl. The aptitude to maximize holistically leads to the capacity to seize macro-proactively. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Think resource-constrained. What does the buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? We constantly facilitate ubiquitous methodologies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! At Interbiznet, we believe we know how to harness vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous, reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The social-network-based mega-structuring compliance factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think we know that it is better to iterate compellingly than to iterate iteravely. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for handling new social networks? Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. If you monetize efficiently, you may have to optimize extensibly. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capacity to incentivize without lessening our power to grow. Think compelling. Think distributed. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time.