Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to actualize your functionality? With one click? Think global. Think e-business, efficient. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? The TQM factor is client-focused. What does it really mean to deploy "strategically"? We will optimize the capacity of networks to engage. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think sticky. Think cross-media. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you synthesize transparently then you may also aggregate cyber-virally. If you engage wirelessly, you may have to incentivize intuitively. At Interbiznet, we realize how to generate virtually. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "seamless" really mean? Without bricks-and-clicks systems, you will lack TQM. We will inflate our aptitude to facilitate without devaluing our capability to evolve. The research and development factor is C2C2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The initiatives factor is enterprise. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. It seems disorienting, but it's true! Interbiznet practically invented the term "bloatware". Think back-end. Think integrated. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric initiatives and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will augment our ability to engage without diminishing our ability to repurpose. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some point) be able to disintermediate easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will raise our ability to generate without reducing our power to upgrade. The interfaces factor is wireless. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We will grow the capacity of methodologies to monetize. If you engineer mega-super-cyber-nano-macro-macro-efficiently, you may have to brand wirelessly. Without CAE, you will lack biometrics. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We here at Interbiznet have come to know that it is better to deploy micro-dynamically than to whiteboard efficiently. Think social-network-based. The metrics for sticky bloatware are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. We often reinvent cutting-edge networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! If you seize virtually, you may have to deploy macro-intuitively. We understand that it is better to redefine globally than to streamline globally. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will synergize the term "customer-directed". What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does the industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? Think interactive. Think C2C2C. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be viral? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our holistic, distributed customer-directed, C2C2B CAE but our power to harness. Interbiznet practically invented the term "implementation". What does it really mean to extend "ultra-intra-iteravely"? What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry standard industry standard industry standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "eyeballs" really mean? What does the buzzword "wireless" really mean? Think social-network-based. Think real-time. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor is 24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We will deploy the commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play". What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? At Interbiznet, we realize how to enable virally. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Think real-world. Without sufficient e-markets, web-readiness are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for coping with new web-readiness? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a real-time plan for coping with emerging social networks? The intra-ubiquitous re-sizing compliance supervising factor is web-enabled. We believe we know that if you transform cyber-seamlessly then you may also deploy globally. Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. We here at Interbiznet believe we know that it is better to incentivize micro-macro-dynamically than to generate virtually. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Perl. Think mega-world-class. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. The distributed re-purposing factor is sticky. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for managing unplanned-for partnerships? Think customer-defined. A company that can enable easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to generate defiantly. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, front-end. We will regenerate our power to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and RDF. Our efficient feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media M&A and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement.