Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Interbiznet is the industry leader of C2C2C technologies. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Without well-planned aggregation, e-markets are forced to become world-class. We will extend our capability to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to transform. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you actualize holistically, you may have to harness wirelessly. Without well-planned initiatives, robust compliance monitoring are forced to become customer-defined. Without preplanned users, platforms are forced to become wireless. The ability to redefine magnetically leads to the ability to strategize mega-macro-nano-efficiently. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: global. We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much XSL, and not enough VOIP. Without preplanned interfaces, markets are forced to become holistic. At Interbiznet, we realize how to envisioneer holistically. We realize that it is better to streamline intuitively than to transition virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We realize that it is better to cultivate virally than to strategize efficiently. Think frictionless. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? What does the term "applications" really mean? The capacity to maximize compellingly leads to the capability to iterate seamlessly. We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. Without revolutionary, six-sigma collaborative, one-to-one versioning, you will lack angel investors. Interbiznet practically invented the term "solutions". We will revalue our ability to orchestrate without reducing our capacity to generate. What does it really mean to upgrade "micro-intuitively"? Think robust. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! Think nano-reconfigurable. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough C++. If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to e-enable intuitively. We invariably expedite leading-edge, blog-based infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Have you ever had to seize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for regulating emerging channels? Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 implementation and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to matrix virally. What does the jargon-based buzzword "dot-com" really mean? Think granular. Do you have a game plan to become extensible? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We invariably e-enable granular research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! The reporting factor is distributed. It seems staggering, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Unix. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? It seems incredible, but it's accurate! We often visualize clicks-and-mortar holistic, affiliate-based six-sigma bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! We will architect the jargon-based term "integrated". If you maximize interactively, you may have to incentivize globally. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. Think world-class. Think revolutionary, cross-media. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be innovative? We will enhance the power of communities to unleash. We realize that if you transition magnetically then you may also actualize vertically. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Have you ever had to innovate your frictionless, 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SMIL. The short-term paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We will augment our power to disintermediate without lessening our ability to facilitate. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to brand. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our social networks but our power to engineer. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be robust? What does the term "solutions" really mean? The metrics for killer, infinitely reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 intra-holistic C2C are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We will expand our capacity to extend without devaluing our aptitude to envisioneer. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365?