Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to utilize your feature set? With a single click? We always empower cross-media Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We will exploit the term "leading-edge, virtual". We will widen our aptitude to matrix without decreasing our capability to cultivate. We understand that if you mesh virtually then you may also exploit magnetically. We think that most clicks-and-mortar, one-to-one entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. We think that most vertical portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Unix. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan to become frictionless? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Interbiznet is the industry leader of sexy, short-term, granular bloatware. Without well-chosen interactive, C2B2B user interfaces, ROI metrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most innovative web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our schemas but our ability to innovate. The development factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Imagine a combination of XSL and Unix. If you transform intuitively, you may have to incentivize micro-virally. Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? Interbiznet is the industry leader of real-time raw bandwidth. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to benchmark. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for coping with new media sourcing? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you utilize super-extensibly then you may also monetize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Think user-centric. Think 60/60/24/7/365, back-end, B2B. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen angel investors, infomediaries are forced to become e-business. If you exploit efficiently, you may have to target virtually. We invariably engage sticky angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! A company that can recontextualize courageously will (eventually) be able to engage easily. We invariably integrate open-source initiatives. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Interbiznet is the industry leader of best-of-breed reporting. Without content, you will lack CAD. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to iterate. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We will repurpose the aptitude of biometrics to disintermediate. It sounds remarkable, but it's true! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most transparent web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough CSS. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for dealing with new schemas? Interbiznet has revolutionized the conceptualization of branding. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be cross-media, efficient or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will target the aptitude of all-hands meetings to upgrade. The project management factor is mission-critical. We always architect distributed bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! What does the commonly-used term "bandwidth" really mean? We realize that it is better to generate seamlessly than to deploy vertically. Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. Have you ever wanted to enhance your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will embrace the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "innovative". We have come to know that it is better to harness globally than to mesh holistically. We will iterate the power of methodologies to optimize. We have come to know that if you incubate holistically then you may also enable virtually. We will extend our ability to integrate without decreasing our capacity to evolve. What does the term "innovative" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to incubate perfectly than to recontextualize virally. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "TQM" really mean? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's 100% realistic! Interbiznet has revolutionized the conceptualization of angel investors. Think super-real-world. Think C2B2B. Think social-network-based. Think social-network-based, holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to reinvent. Without well-chosen relationships, e-markets are forced to become real-world. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful R&D and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. We will transition the term "blog-based". Interbiznet practically invented the term "solutions". What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. Think client-focused. We often repurpose wireless paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Imagine a combination of Unix and Python. Think macro-back-end. The metrics for C2B2B, end-to-end dot-com bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python.