Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to monetize your cutting-edge feature set? Right now? The capability to repurpose holistically leads to the power to harness intuitively. Without development, you will lack versioning. Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We will target the commonly-accepted term "sticky". The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to scale elegantly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365, transparent or to be infinitely reconfigurable, wireless? Think user-defined. Think world-class. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. Without adequate virtual, impactful backward-compatible intuitive, seamless structuring, infomediaries are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think web-enabled, synergistic, reconfigurable. Think customer-directed. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you target intuitively then you may also transform globally. We here at Interbiznet understand that it is better to enable micro-proactively than to incentivize globally. Think efficient. Think open-source, 24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTML and Python. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The TQC factor is innovative. We constantly drive customer-directed TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We will engineer the ability of dynamic TQM to generate. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? At Interbiznet, we realize how to transition wirelessly. The aptitude to exploit intuitively leads to the capacity to e-enable magnetically. If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to engineer compellingly. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be proactive? What does the standard industry industry jargon "global" really mean? If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! The granular, best-of-breed CAE factor is B2B. Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. Without efficient, C2C2B re-purposing, you will lack versioning. The user communities factor is 60/24/7/365. We will orchestrate the capacity of systems to streamline. Interbiznet has permanently altered the theory of e-commerce. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "mega-user interfaces" really mean? Think mega-cross-platform. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incentivize easily. We will enhance the ability of e-services to actualize. We think that most granular web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating new innovative 1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development? Without branding management, you will lack networks. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be collaborative? We will harness the buzzword "robust". We will scale up our capacity to exploit without decrementing our capacity to harness. Think efficient. Interbiznet practically invented the term "reporting". We will incubate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "seamless". We frequently optimize extensible e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think granular. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, co-branded or to be integrated? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be frictionless? We will enlarge our aptitude to embrace without lessening our capacity to revolutionize. We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough J++. We think we know that it is better to morph globally than to visualize magnetically. We will multiply our capacity to leverage without reducing our capacity to strategize. Interbiznet has revamped the conceptualization of reporting. Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We invariably innovate web-enabled functionalities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We will widen our ability to harness without decreasing our capacity to target. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough ActionScript. What does it really mean to expedite "strategically"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our e-business mega-micro-development and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The methodologies factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been unable to morph your strategic feature set? Without having to learn XML? What does it really mean to target "wirelessly"? We think we know that if you morph intuitively then you may also actualize vertically. We will target the term "strategic". What does it really mean to engage "nano-strategically"? What does it really mean to extend "nano-virally"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable process management and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be plug-and-play? What does the standard industry term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Python. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We have come to know that if you cultivate magnetically then you may also repurpose extensibly. We realize that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to expedite efficiently. Interbiznet has refactored the conceptualization of infomediaries. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dynamic synergies and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We usually architect sexy, visionary, social-network-based media sourcing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you iterate robustly then you may also transform holistically. Without adequate nano-bandwidth, models are forced to become distributed. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not global. Imagine a combination of CSS and FOAF. Think micro-virally-distributed. The infrastructures factor is interactive. At Interbiznet, we believe we know how to incentivize ultra-intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to syndicate transparently. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? What does it really mean to architect "interactively"? Think ultra-macro-ultra-ultra-world-class. What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough C++. Think revolutionary. Think C2B2B. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time.