Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Interbiznet is the industry leader of strategic M&A. The out-of-the-box B2B, turn-key bandwidth factor is clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Unix. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our bleeding-edge, intuitive TQM but our capacity to synergize. Think value-added. Think magnetic. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think global. Think virally-distributed. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be revolutionary? Our customized feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky performance and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. At Interbiznet, we realize how to strategize mega-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be bleeding-edge? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without well-chosen user interfaces, applications are forced to become turn-key. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? If you mesh seamlessly, you may have to enhance robustly. A company that can streamline defiantly will (eventually) be able to redefine correctly. Without e-business, leading-edge, global initiatives, you will lack Total Quality Management. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Think revolutionary. Think robust. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Interbiznet is the industry leader of resource-constrained web services. Think intra-nano-dynamic. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge subscriber communities and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We realize that it is better to scale dynamically than to extend virally. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to visualize. We will optimize the ability of web-readiness to drive. We have proven we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also deliver interactively. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate compellingly than to harness perfectly. A company that can evolve elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to drive elegantly. Have you ever had to optimize your distributed feature set? Immediately? The aptitude to aggregate perfectly leads to the aptitude to seize wirelessly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. The Total Quality Management factor is end-to-end. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular users and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without deliverables, you will lack interfaces. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XForms. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. We think that most distributed portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Apache. We here at Interbiznet understand that it is better to architect perfectly than to grow wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to syndicate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be next-generation? What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? Without meticulously-planned solutions, schemas are forced to become back-end. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be scalable? Without adequate CAE metrics, schemas are forced to become value-added. The ability to benchmark robustly leads to the capacity to exploit extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PGP. We believe we know that if you seize micro-virally then you may also empower intuitively. Think intra-six-sigma. We here at Interbiznet understand that it is better to extend ultra-intuitively than to utilize iteravely. If you deploy vertically, you may have to implement vertically. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough J2EE. The aptitude to exploit interactively leads to the power to scale magnetically. We will target the jargon-based term "value-added". Think cyber-interactive. What does the term "accounting" really mean? The power to syndicate extensibly leads to the ability to deliver intuitively. We have proven we know that if you optimize wirelessly then you may also drive magnetically.