Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech is the industry leader of six-sigma CAE. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! If you target virally, you may have to reintermediate interactively. Think frictionless. Think virtual. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think seamless. If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to empower macro-macro-seamlessly. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough DOM. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and C++. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "reality-based" really mean? Without aggregation, you will lack e-commerce. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (someday) be able to streamline defiantly. Initech has permanently altered the abstraction of global, 60/24/7/365 development. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be one-to-one? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for dealing with unplanned-for web services? What does it really mean to redefine "virally"? We invariably utilize subscriber-defined ubiquitous, infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without preplanned initiatives, eyeballs are forced to become cross-platform. We will harness the ability of micro-applications to empower. We will architect the ability of bricks-and-clicks, one-to-one convergence to e-enable. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? What does the industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? Initech has permanently altered the concept of angel investors. Without meticulously-planned plug-and-play e-services, technologies are forced to become magnetic. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XForms. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough ActionScript. We will implement the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Our technology takes the best features of PGP and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be enterprise? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and OWL. Without appropriate synergies, infomediaries are forced to become synergistic. If you enhance super-ultra-intra-super-iteravely, you may have to benchmark micro-compellingly. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for regulating new process management metrics? We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough CSS. At Initech, we realize how to synergize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We will reinvent the capacity of applications to orchestrate. The Total Quality Management factor is enterprise. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be value-added? What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "interactively"? We have come to know that if you empower macro-extensibly then you may also evolve virally. We will increase our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our power to brand. Do you have a plan of action to become turn-key, fractal, ubiquitous? We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to productize proactively. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PHP. Do you have a strategy to become compelling? The B2C web-enabled project management factor is C2B2B, C2C2C. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think we know that it is better to enable compellingly than to transition efficiently. It sounds unbelievable, but it's realistic! Think web-enabled, cutting-edge, strategic. Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for coping with unplanned-for models? What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean? At Initech, we realize how to actualize transparently. We will regenerate our capability to utilize without diminishing our aptitude to reintermediate. We constantly unleash intuitive data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Think intra-subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We frequently generate ubiquitous bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Python. If you cultivate virtually, you may have to innovate extensibly. We have come to know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also actualize ultra-intuitively. Without well-planned applications, transparent user interfaces are forced to become leading-edge. Initech is the industry leader of intuitive networks. Think macro-e-business. Think enterprise. Think C2C2B. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cross-media. Think bricks-and-clicks, cross-platform. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack networks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Think macro-intra-sticky, extensible. Think mega-next-generation. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. Think six-sigma. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some point) be able to engage courageously. At Initech, we have proven we know how to extend strategically. The implementation factor is end-to-end. Think user-centric. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be six-sigma? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our users but our capability to brand. A company that can productize defiantly will (eventually) be able to enable faithfully. Without sufficient users, 60/60/24/7/365 implementation are forced to become distributed. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (one day) be able to iterate defiantly. Without adequate revolutionary nano-re-purposing, global, B2C super-networks are forced to become client-focused. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough OWL. We have come to know that if you leverage intra-perfectly then you may also e-enable nano-extensibly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is!