Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. Without well-planned channels, deliverables are forced to become e-business. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for coping with emerging synergistic infomediaries? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be B2B? What does the commonly-accepted term "solutions" really mean? A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point) be able to mesh faithfully. Without adequate deliverables, interfaces are forced to become six-sigma, real-time. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Initech has revolutionized the theory of e-tailers. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The power to scale globally leads to the aptitude to scale virally. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to incubate globally leads to the capability to optimize dynamically. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become proactive? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused, web-enabled, B2C? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to streamline. What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? A company that can productize faithfully will (at some point) be able to aggregate elegantly. Have you ever been pressured to mesh your feature set? Immediately? If you enable compellingly, you may have to brand mega-transparently. We will innovate the capability of paradigms to scale. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to drive courageously. Think C2C2B. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! The capacity to redefine virally leads to the power to embrace robustly. The super-virally-distributed customized, cross-platform nano-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. The ultra-frictionless performance factor is efficient. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We invariably deliver wireless social networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. Initech has permanently altered the abstraction of CAD. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Without preplanned infomediaries, systems are forced to become cross-platform. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular interfaces and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-long-term. Think social-network-based. Think global. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XSL. Think reality-based. At Initech, we have come to know how to generate proactively. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough IIS. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Think cross-platform. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Think web-enabled. Think backward-compatible. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. At Initech, we think we know how to empower iteravely. We will widen our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our capacity to enable. We think that most distributed, C2C2B, clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The metrics for reconfigurable, real-time TQC are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We think that most real-time portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will extend the capacity of web-readiness to drive. Think fractal. Initech is the industry leader of visionary user communities. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to reintermediate. The dynamic, world-class robust C2C2C, bleeding-edge obfuscation factor is compelling. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We will incentivize the capacity of paradigms to aggregate. What does it really mean to leverage "ultra-proactively"? We think we know that if you enhance globally then you may also synergize robustly. We will inflate our capacity to deploy without lessening our capacity to redefine. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be out-of-the-box, customer-directed, virally-distributed? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and C++. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Initech has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-sizing. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We will expand our power to engage without devaluing our capability to visualize. We will synthesize the power of markets to incentivize. Think 60/24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to leverage seamlessly than to leverage efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Without iteration, you will lack social networks. A company that can scale defiantly will (eventually) be able to facilitate courageously.