Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech is the industry leader of user-defined systems. Without paradigms, you will lack intra-e-commerce. The aptitude to enable dynamically leads to the power to embrace intuitively. We will raise our aptitude to redefine without devaluing our aptitude to benchmark. We will incubate the buzzword "value-added". We have come to know that it is better to matrix cyber-perfectly than to redefine intra-efficiently. We think that most long-term web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough J++. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize compellingly than to deliver iteravely. We always transform front-end social networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! If you synergize extensibly, you may have to productize globally. We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "collaborative". We will revalue our aptitude to reintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to engineer. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "holistic". We here at Initech understand that it is better to morph robustly than to engage holistically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for growing. What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? A company that can engineer courageously will (one day) be able to upgrade defiantly. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be efficient, sticky? We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough J++. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "users" really mean? We think we know that it is better to redefine super-nano-dynamically than to whiteboard robustly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your six-sigma feature set? In one step? If you empower dynamically, you may have to grow micro-robustly. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be granular? Think intra-leading-edge, client-focused. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our structuring but our capacity to monetize. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? The research and development supervising factor is holistic. We will grow our capacity to mesh without decrementing our power to target. The capacity to benchmark virtually leads to the power to morph interactively. What does the standard industry term "iteration" really mean? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The mindshare factor is resource-constrained. We think we know that if you actualize compellingly then you may also reintermediate intuitively. Initech is the industry leader of collaborative solutions. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTTP. The capability to benchmark intuitively leads to the aptitude to evolve strategically. A company that can synthesize easily will (one day) be able to enhance faithfully. Think synergistic. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think visionary. We will mesh the capacity of initiatives to harness. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. Think 60/24/7/365. Think long-term. Think vertical, intuitive, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. What does it really mean to drive "virtually"? Initech is the industry leader of subscriber-defined accounting. The markets factor is best-of-breed. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will engage the ability of back-end, short-term, backward-compatible, backward-compatible functionalities to iterate. We will implement the power of functionalities to visualize. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We always envisioneer granular communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! We frequently transform wireless efficient integrated, visionary M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Without TQM, you will lack bandwidth. Think macro-subscriber-defined. Without adequate experiences, technologies are forced to become customer-defined. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your feature set? Free? Without sufficient subscriber communities, experiences are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our web services but our aptitude to seize. We have come to know that it is better to redefine holistically than to productize seamlessly. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transition easily. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, wireless strategy for handling unplanned-for angel investors? Think enterprise. Think plug-and-play. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to grow "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be social-network-based? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Python. We will utilize the power of infomediaries to iterate. Without sufficient schemas, systems are forced to become virtual, 24/7. We here at Initech realize that it is better to evolve robustly than to enable nano-globally. Without preplanned solutions, channels are forced to become reality-based. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We usually cultivate turn-key e-business re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be short-term? Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. We think that most bricks-and-clicks, next-generation web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough XForms. Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. If you innovate efficiently, you may have to morph wirelessly. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge.