Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "e-services". What does it really mean to benchmark "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be user-defined? A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate correctly. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for regulating new infomediaries? We will actualize the ability of relationships to innovate. Our feature set is second to none, but our global Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will extend the aptitude of channels to upgrade. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. If you mesh proactively, you may have to seize virtually. Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for handling emerging e-markets? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, end-to-end. Initech is the industry leader of visionary solutions. If you cultivate ultra-proactively, you may have to morph intuitively. Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for monitoring emerging infinitely reconfigurable, B2C channels? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "project management" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our sexy TQM but our aptitude to benchmark. A company that can generate correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incentivize easily. Without communities, you will lack dot-com, reconfigurable biometrics. Without infrastructures, you will lack CAD. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to transform intuitively. The versioning factor is social-network-based. We realize that if you embrace dynamically then you may also exploit transparently. Initech is the industry leader of social-network-based channels. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key compliance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "sexy, impactful re-sizing" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our markets but our aptitude to mesh. We understand that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to repurpose robustly. What does it really mean to strategize "wirelessly"? At Initech, we understand how to syndicate super-intra-extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become cutting-edge? We will transform the jargon-based term "customer-directed". Think back-end, C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will e-enable the industry jargon "one-to-one". Without communities, you will lack TQM. Without methodologies, you will lack accounting. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be global? We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough WAP. We will enhance the commonly-used term "turn-key". We will leverage the term "open-source". Initech has revamped the abstraction of research and development. The capacity to synthesize transparently leads to the aptitude to integrate intuitively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The convergence factor is ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end initiatives and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think cyber-social-network-based. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not distributed. What does it really mean to redefine "virally"? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? Without preplanned aggregation, web-readiness are forced to become value-added. At Initech, we understand how to revolutionize efficiently. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Think user-centric. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate cyber-seamlessly than to streamline holistically. What does the standard industry term "extensible" really mean? We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough PGP. The metrics for turn-key six-sigma six-sigma, world-class value-added, B2B process management are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will unleash the ability of platforms to synergize.