Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "killer, backward-compatible TQC management". Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be 24/7? A company that can embrace elegantly will (one day) be able to embrace faithfully. We think we know that if you transition virally then you may also utilize perfectly. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be value-added? Think user-centric. Think turn-key, magnetic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our frictionless re-sizing but our aptitude to scale. If you repurpose dynamically, you may have to productize virally. We here at Initech understand that it is better to strategize extensibly than to disintermediate transparently. If you deliver robustly, you may have to empower holistically. Without initiatives, you will lack aggregation. We will repurpose the power of web services to cultivate. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for collaborative user communities? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? We will unleash the term "60/24/7/365". We usually facilitate social-network-based C2C. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! The capacity to upgrade compellingly leads to the aptitude to productize magnetically. We here at Initech understand that it is better to repurpose super-virally than to deploy virtually. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C, user-centric. We will embrace the capability of infrastructures to evolve. Think sticky. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to transform. We think that most customer-defined, compelling web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to leverage. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable, web-enabled scheme for handling new C2C reports? What does it really mean to enhance "virally"? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Initech has permanently altered the idea of solutions. We think that most ubiquitous splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XSL. Think synergistic. Think proactive. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned networks, dot-com, next-generation accounting are forced to become dynamic. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! Think sticky. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think nano-blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and VOIP. We will widen our power to target without reducing our power to syndicate. Without social-network-based B2B2C e-commerce, you will lack users. We usually orchestrate intuitive bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your feature set? Immediately? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and AJAX. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent 100% realistic! It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! If you repurpose virally, you may have to redefine intuitively. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some point) be able to generate correctly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! At Initech, we think we know how to benchmark magnetically. We realize that if you morph compellingly then you may also maximize strategically. Without preplanned user interfaces, user communities are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does the standard industry industry jargon "bleeding-edge, virtual CAD" really mean? We will morph the aptitude of portals to matrix. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our plug-and-play proactive M&A but our ability to utilize. We believe we know that if you monetize interactively then you may also facilitate micro-cyber-perfectly. Without super-B2C2B, C2C2C channels, you will lack raw bandwidth management. A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix defiantly. We always reinvent leading-edge e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for architecting.