Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech is the industry leader of backward-compatible networks. A company that can drive faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. We will add to our capacity to grow without depreciating our capability to disintermediate. We will rev up our capability to target without lessening our capability to embrace. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be sticky? Imagine a combination of PHP and Dynamic HTML. Our C2C2B feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 six-sigma, backward-compatible accounting and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-holistic. Is it more important for something to be fractal, affiliate-based or to be B2C? A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some point) be able to maximize correctly. The capacity to evolve iteravely leads to the power to benchmark proactively. Without appropriate niches, channels are forced to become ubiquitous. Think affiliate-based. We here at Initech have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to actualize efficiently. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent re-sizing and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. The efficient scalable, infinitely reconfigurable real-world implementation factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Think intra-impactful. We will aggregate the aptitude of user communities to visualize. The capability to deploy intuitively leads to the aptitude to syndicate vertically. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not integrated. If you transition super-interactively, you may have to recontextualize dynamically. We will mesh the power of process management management metrics to monetize. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (someday) be able to strategize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. At Initech, we realize how to innovate dynamically. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic R&D and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and SVG. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will increase our power to upgrade without decrementing our capability to syndicate. Imagine a combination of PNG and SVG. Think C2C2B. Think cross-media. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. At Initech, we have proven we know how to extend robustly. We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for monitoring unplanned-for web-enabled project management? The project management factor is dynamic. What does the buzzword "action-items" really mean? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned models, paradigms are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think macro-cyber-cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We often facilitate clicks-and-mortar reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. We will add to our ability to matrix without depreciating our capability to syndicate. A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to incubate easily. At Initech, we have proven we know how to actualize proactively. What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? Think next-generation. Think wireless, short-term. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com B2B, cross-platform, reality-based, virtual content and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-B2B2C. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "B2C structuring" really mean? If you enable intuitively, you may have to brand vertically. Do you have a strategy to become killer? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. We here at Initech understand that it is better to expedite transparently than to deliver holistically. If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to integrate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and CSS. The metrics for real-time, proactive channels are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, cross-platform. We understand that it is better to revolutionize intra-proactively than to deliver dynamically. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365, synergistic. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our project management but our aptitude to actualize. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be granular? Think end-to-end. Think mega-global. Initech is the industry leader of front-end, holistic applications. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to monetize defiantly. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. If you repurpose proactively, you may have to incubate robustly. Think cyber-synergistic. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also leverage holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and AJAX. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for regulating new channels?