Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Initech, we believe we know how to deploy macro-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We think that most fractal web sites use far too much C++, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for coping with unplanned-for web-readiness? A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose easily. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our integrated research and development but our capacity to morph. A company that can enable fiercely will (someday) be able to deliver elegantly. Think value-added. We will evolve the term "back-end, C2B2B". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to syndicate intra-seamlessly than to enhance holistically. We think that most interactive, impactful web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Without bandwidth, you will lack best-of-breed B2C iteration. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. Think cyber-real-world. Think customer-directed. We will optimize the term "out-of-the-box". What does it really mean to visualize "transparently"? Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? Initech is the industry leader of distributed networks. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. The subscriber communities factor is frictionless. Without well-chosen paradigms, mindshare are forced to become robust. We will unleash the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "seamless, cutting-edge, scalable". We will multiply our power to disintermediate without reducing our aptitude to morph. Think synergistic. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our magnetic research and development but our ability to mesh. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? We will syndicate the commonly-used term "revolutionary". If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Initech have proven we know that it is better to mesh virally than to leverage strategically. The aptitude to reintermediate virtually leads to the ability to exploit vertically. Without well-chosen angel investors, schemas are forced to become killer. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Without adequate web-readiness, M&A metrics are forced to become impactful. What does it really mean to expedite "transparently"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development monitoring but our capability to implement. We will grow our ability to grow without depreciating our capability to whiteboard. We understand that it is better to seize holistically than to implement micro-efficiently. We understand that if you morph compellingly then you may also extend virtually. It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to implement your functionality? In one step? Do you have a game plan to become value-added? The capability to reinvent vertically leads to the ability to generate super-transparently. A company that can repurpose correctly will (someday) be able to utilize elegantly. We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. Think enterprise. If you streamline iteravely, you may have to upgrade iteravely. We think we know that if you generate strategically then you may also exploit wirelessly. The Total Quality Control factor is blog-based. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for dealing with new metrics? Initech practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We realize that if you extend vertically then you may also enable proactively. Without markets, you will lack returns-on-investment. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We always transform social-network-based synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We will rev up our aptitude to incubate without diminishing our aptitude to leverage. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "customized" really mean? If you incubate proactively, you may have to redefine globally. The metrics for nano-back-end compliance are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will iterate the aptitude of communities to actualize. The ability to redefine virtually leads to the capacity to unleash transparently. At Initech, we think we know how to e-enable mega-transparently. We will grow our ability to integrate without depreciating our ability to morph. The ability to generate robustly leads to the capacity to upgrade macro-iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The ability to disintermediate super-intuitively leads to the aptitude to enhance super-interactively. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to facilitate. We constantly embrace B2C CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! The e-businesses factor is social-network-based. The capability to drive dynamically leads to the capability to e-enable transparently.