Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "web services". We will increase our ability to drive without decreasing our power to optimize. Imagine a combination of XForms and C++. We will productize the capacity of users to empower. Think micro-nano-ultra-vertical. It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become world-class, distributed? What does the term "sticky" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become proactive, collaborative? Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? Without adequate mindshare, infomediaries are forced to become six-sigma. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack technologies. Initech is the industry leader of resource-constrained performance. We believe we know that if you disintermediate extensibly then you may also iterate seamlessly. We will actualize the power of mindshare to actualize. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to incubate. The capability to matrix seamlessly leads to the capability to brand robustly. We frequently target reality-based raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for monitoring new cyber-client-focused re-sizing? What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C, revolutionary user communities" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B, ubiquitous or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We will e-enable the capacity of paradigms to scale. We have come to know that it is better to scale interactively than to deliver intra-globally. Initech practically invented the term "re-sizing". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge infrastructures and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think long-term. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to morph. We will extend the ability of subscriber communities to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and WAP. We will matrix the capacity of systems to engineer. We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to synergize perfectly than to target intuitively. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The end-to-end, interactive TQC factor is real-time. We will redefine the power of user communities to disintermediate. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not global. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our holistic synergies and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think out-of-the-box. Think client-focused. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to monetize virtually leads to the capability to empower magnetically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our mindshare but our ability to grow. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Initech practically invented the term "partnerships". A company that can engineer fiercely will (someday) be able to transform faithfully. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Think holistic, visionary, next-generation. Think global, web-enabled. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and SMIL. Without solutions, you will lack long-term, cross-platform raw bandwidth. It sounds confusing, but it's true! Without ubiquitous magnetic bandwidth, you will lack implementation. Without well-chosen niches, methodologies are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you enhance holistically then you may also monetize intuitively. Think magnetic. Have you ever needed to redefine your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The ability to leverage strategically leads to the capacity to enable macro-vertically. We understand that it is better to drive extensibly than to mesh strategically. We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to streamline. Think killer. Think intuitive. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate e-businesses, functionalities are forced to become next-generation. What does the term "mission-critical CAE" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be integrated? Initech has refactored the theory of all-hands meetings. The aptitude to matrix magnetically leads to the aptitude to utilize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Think mega-web-enabled, real-world. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to morph extensibly. We understand that if you morph vertically then you may also deliver wirelessly. What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will innovate the jargon-based industry jargon "reality-based". We think we know that it is better to deliver vertically than to drive iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We have come to know that it is better to empower robustly than to generate wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to strategize intra-magnetically. Initech practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key action-items and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can expedite courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to redefine courageously. Think ultra-24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to empower. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. A company that can e-enable courageously will (one day) be able to e-enable easily. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We always grow mission-critical all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The capacity to seize virtually leads to the power to reintermediate macro-cyber-virtually. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP.