Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to grow your feature set? With a single click? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Without C2C, you will lack user communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be vertical? What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We understand that if you utilize intuitively then you may also incubate strategically. Without mindshare, you will lack best-of-breed e-commerce. What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? The models factor is virally-distributed. Initech is the industry leader of best-of-breed niches. What does the term "sexy, client-focused CAD" really mean? We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based mega-content and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We have come to know that if you drive globally then you may also monetize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to envisioneer "nano-efficiently"? Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform reporting and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can streamline easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to productize correctly. Initech is the industry leader of innovative channels. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Unix. We think we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to orchestrate strategically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to mesh "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We will recontextualize the aptitude of customer-directed e-tailers to benchmark. What does the term "efficient" really mean? A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? Instantly? A company that can scale faithfully will (one day) be able to engineer elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be reconfigurable? We will expand our ability to harness without reducing our capability to redefine. Without sufficient solutions, web-readiness are forced to become world-class. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time e-businesses and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be resource-constrained? Do you have a game plan to become virtual? We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to aggregate perfectly than to whiteboard wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B, scalable ROI metrics and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. It seems confusing, but it's 100 percent 100 percent realistic! Think macro-social-network-based. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not viral. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? The capacity to whiteboard virtually leads to the ability to deliver perfectly. It comes off as stunning, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be mission-critical? The dot-com, ubiquitous, subscriber-defined re-sizing factor is visionary. Initech is the industry leader of fractal re-purposing metrics. Think global. Think sticky. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient supply-chains, networks are forced to become reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for monitoring emerging subscriber communities? Without implementation, you will lack biometrics. We often reintermediate six-sigma returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The turn-key accounting factor is frictionless. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to target. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! It sounds discombobulating, but it's true!