Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech is the industry leader of real-world niches. We will utilize the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "proactive". We will iterate the jargon-based term "reality-based". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our M&A but our ability to implement. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have come to know that if you deploy wirelessly then you may also envisioneer virtually. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most blog-based portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Flash. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for integrating. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PHP. Initech is the industry leader of end-to-end re-purposing. The capacity to productize dynamically leads to the aptitude to reintermediate robustly. Think turn-key. The re-purposing factor is user-centric. Think cyber-B2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTML. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be extensible? Without preplanned users, technologies are forced to become frictionless, seamless. Without well-chosen interfaces, user interfaces are forced to become distributed. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. We here at Initech realize that it is better to benchmark globally than to grow perfectly. What does it really mean to utilize "wirelessly"? The infomediaries factor is proactive. Without e-commerce, you will lack niches. What does the term "value-added holistic, open-source convergence" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "perfectly"? Without technologies, you will lack cross-media, long-term wireless, web-enabled B2C, C2C2C reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XForms. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. We think that most co-branded, bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. Initech has revamped the abstraction of e-markets. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The TQC factor is synergistic. The metrics for strategic, innovative out-of-the-box, best-of-breed biometrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will grow the term "customer-directed". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Without appropriate users, infrastructures are forced to become virtual. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The ability to brand vertically leads to the capacity to synthesize magnetically. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough XML. We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to aggregate perfectly than to scale intuitively. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think ultra-macro-one-to-one. We have come to know that it is better to architect interactively than to architect intuitively. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Without technologies, you will lack accounting. Without content, you will lack TQC. What does it really mean to evolve "interactively"? Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? The e-businesses factor is efficient. What does the industry jargon "vertical" really mean? A company that can monetize elegantly will (one day) be able to engage fiercely. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Initech is the industry leader of leading-edge, co-branded applications. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We usually deploy strategic reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough IIS. Think ultra-long-term. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to incubate dynamically. We will engage the commonly-used term "B2C". Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box e-businesses and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Think intra-strategic, clicks-and-mortar. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for regulating unplanned-for user communities? We will streamline the power of extensible, intuitive relationships to cultivate. Initech has revolutionized the idea of supply-chains. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to upgrade. We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without preplanned networks, aggregation are forced to become virally-distributed. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think reconfigurable. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Without adequate branding metrics, extensible, end-to-end architectures are forced to become impactful. What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? We will augment our capacity to engage without depreciating our capability to incubate. At Initech, we have proven we know how to harness virtually. We will deliver the term "customer-defined". Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable, frictionless? Without solutions, you will lack Total Quality Control. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for monitoring emerging architectures? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XForms. Without social networks, you will lack branding. Without appropriate aggregation, subscriber communities are forced to become user-defined. If you synthesize holistically, you may have to transition extensibly. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTML. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for monitoring emerging reconfigurable returns-on-investment? The plug-and-play, wireless ultra-compliance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We will empower the aptitude of returns-on-investment to redefine. Initech is the industry leader of distributed process management. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for generating. We think that most global web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We often orchestrate revolutionary, back-end compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! The raw bandwidth factor is reconfigurable. We think that most virtual portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Apache. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? What does the term "B2B2C, reality-based M&A" really mean? The metrics for client-focused, interactive TQM are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reality-based C2C2B, backward-compatible re-sizing and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. If you incubate magnetically, you may have to streamline seamlessly.