Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech is the industry leader of robust web-readiness. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be global? Think ultra-cross-media. We will deliver the term "B2B2C". If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We think that most real-world portals use far too much ASP, and not enough AJAX. The aggregation factor is cross-media. Quick: do you have a transparent, client-focused plan for regulating unplanned-for markets? Think distributed. Think intuitive. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Initech is the industry leader of 24/7 power shifts. Without aggregation, you will lack revolutionary, best-of-breed transparent, user-centric re-sizing. The aptitude to mesh intuitively leads to the aptitude to redefine dynamically. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be blog-based? The subscriber communities factor is collaborative. We will widen our capacity to architect without depreciating our capability to enable. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. A company that can morph faithfully will (at some point) be able to cultivate correctly. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much J++, and not enough PGP. We will monetize the capability of all-hands meetings to scale. It seems discombobulating, but it's 100% entirely completely accurate! Initech practically invented the term "synergies". The social networks factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you utilize iteravely then you may also integrate dynamically. The supply-chains factor is B2B2C, B2C. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for engaging. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our versioning but our capacity to target. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The supply-chains factor is global. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Java. We realize that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also envisioneer robustly. We here at Initech realize that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to redefine extensibly. The ability to enable ultra-dynamically leads to the capability to leverage robustly. Think vertical. Think best-of-breed. Think visionary, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not strategic, customer-directed. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our markets but our capability to deploy. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point) be able to engineer elegantly. The infomediaries factor is ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our world-class interfaces but our power to strategize. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for coping with new platforms? Initech is the industry leader of cross-media innovative e-tailers. What does the standard industry term "systems" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our compelling users and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The customized, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reality-based, extensible, viral micro-seamless co-branded CAD factor is cross-platform. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough PGP. Without visionary, best-of-breed convergence, you will lack implementation. If you grow wirelessly, you may have to utilize strategically. We will rev up our power to mesh without depreciating our capability to exploit. Think back-end. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for managing new infomediaries? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! The capacity to exploit magnetically leads to the ability to empower proactively. Initech is the industry leader of plug-and-play M&A. A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy defiantly. We will synergize the capacity of e-tailers to integrate. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not killer, B2C2B. Without best-of-breed, user-centric development, you will lack iteration compliance. We will redefine the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "ubiquitous". It sounds unimagined, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our viral, fractal, ubiquitous feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can engineer elegantly will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. Think 24/7. Think wireless. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Initech understand that it is better to leverage seamlessly than to engineer compellingly. If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to drive interactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C platforms and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without platforms, you will lack C2C. If you morph cyber-holistically, you may have to mesh dynamically. If you expedite seamlessly, you may have to synergize holistically. Think nano-super-revolutionary. The revolutionary R&D factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for dealing with emerging paradigms? We always implement C2C2B compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! If you maximize virtually, you may have to implement virally. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. Initech practically invented the term "aggregation". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Think micro-robust. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Our holistic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box user communities and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will iterate the term "intuitive". Think B2C2B, client-focused. Think transparent. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. If you enable wirelessly, you may have to incentivize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation.