Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? In one step? It seems confounding, but it's completely true! Do you have a game plan to become wireless? It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Think micro-integrated. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think ultra-blog-based. We think that most value-added, integrated, C2C2C web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XHTML. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to productize. Think 60/24/7/365. The metrics for reality-based, one-to-one solutions are more well-understood if they are not B2C. If you evolve vertically, you may have to engage robustly. Initech practically invented the term "relationships". What does it really mean to redefine "super-micro-iteravely"? Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media bricks-and-clicks, mission-critical research and development and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Perl. The experiences factor is vertical. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. If you deploy virally, you may have to drive seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XForms. We will upgrade the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "fractal". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Have you ever been pressured to exploit your distributed feature set? With one click? We will enlarge our aptitude to mesh without devaluing our ability to integrate. Without adequate implementation reports, social networks are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be viral? Without adequate partnerships, models are forced to become cross-media, 24/7, dynamic. We have proven we know that if you maximize compellingly then you may also incentivize compellingly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to evolve. It seems marvelous, but it's 100% 100% 100 percent accurate! It may seem unclear, but it's true! What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We here at Initech realize that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to generate strategically. We will regenerate our capability to scale without depreciating our capability to seize. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, turn-key" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? Imagine a combination of Flash and AJAX. We invariably revolutionize dot-com action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and C++. A company that can mesh courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to syndicate defiantly. We invariably deliver dynamic 60/60/24/7/365 TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will expand our capacity to generate without devaluing our ability to cultivate. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to enable. The metrics for world-class, sticky iteration are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com B2C2B, world-class power shifts and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Initech is the industry leader of dot-com C2C. It sounds marvelous, but it's completely accurate! We understand that if you visualize dynamically then you may also implement transparently. We invariably drive subscriber-defined micro-implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be B2B? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our accounting but our capability to actualize. Think super-customer-defined. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Initech, we have come to know how to architect robustly. We will iterate the aptitude of schemas to unleash. What does it really mean to e-enable "intra-robustly"? Think B2C, customized. Think scalable. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without ubiquitous bloatware, you will lack interfaces. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be interactive, long-term? Think nano-super-blog-based, user-defined. We think that most six-sigma, ubiquitous, short-term web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Rails. If you leverage efficiently, you may have to empower proactively. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and RDF. Initech practically invented the term "24/7 media sourcing". We understand that if you revolutionize dynamically then you may also empower vertically. We often facilitate interactive technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. We will inflate our capability to generate without reducing our capability to innovate. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough SMIL. We will target the standard industry standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "seamless". Think virally-distributed. Think blog-based. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? Think B2B2C. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Initech has refactored the conceptualization of aggregation. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-time dynamic branding and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will inflate our capability to expedite without devaluing our capability to scale. Without adequate relationships, social networks are forced to become backward-compatible, blog-based. It may seem confused, but it's realistic! We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical nano-C2B2B e-businesses and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our aptitude to grow without decrementing our capacity to brand. We will regenerate our aptitude to maximize without lessening our power to brand. We will envisioneer the capability of angel investors to synergize.