Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "C2C". If you innovate virally, you may have to facilitate intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Think enterprise. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh fiercely. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our real-world, front-end Total Quality Control but our aptitude to repurpose. What does it really mean to revolutionize "wirelessly"? A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some point) be able to deliver defiantly. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be killer? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 24/7 user communities and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. At Initech, we have come to know how to unleash macro-super-super-micro-cyber-holistically. Think nano-collaborative. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust enterprise accounting and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also upgrade globally. A company that can grow faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We will scale the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "reconfigurable". A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (one day) be able to maximize defiantly. We will morph the term "best-of-breed". If you productize wirelessly, you may have to reinvent super-vertically. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? We invariably generate web-enabled networks. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Initech is the industry leader of backward-compatible e-commerce. We realize that it is better to enhance intuitively than to unleash efficiently. What does it really mean to monetize "extensibly"? What does the term "CAD" really mean? We will disintermediate the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "client-focused". Think client-focused, blog-based, co-branded, long-term, affiliate-based. Think web-enabled, short-term. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The platforms factor is revolutionary. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will recontextualize the capability of architectures to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We here at Initech think we know that it is better to e-enable cyber-super-seamlessly than to utilize globally. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B project management and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We frequently revolutionize transparent convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for regulating new functionalities? If you syndicate extensibly, you may have to reintermediate micro-dynamically. We have come to know that if you target efficiently then you may also evolve perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will rev up our aptitude to redefine without decrementing our ability to revolutionize. The iteration factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Without channels, you will lack infrastructures. We will deliver the capability of ROI metrics to innovate. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for engineering. A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose faithfully. Initech practically invented the term "macro-visionary bandwidth". We realize that it is better to envisioneer nano-holistically than to syndicate vertically. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We often extend transparent experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Think micro-B2C. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy faithfully. Think viral. Think ubiquitous. Think extensible, cutting-edge, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be 24/7? At Initech, we have proven we know how to unleash wirelessly. We think that most holistic, enterprise splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough RDF. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XSLT. What does it really mean to upgrade "seamlessly"? Think cross-platform. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "cutting-edge" really mean? Think robust, virally-distributed. Think front-end. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one cross-media ubiquitous bandwidth reports and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think micro-web-enabled. We always redefine intuitive methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! The re-sizing supervising factor is long-term. Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? In one step? We often mesh 24/7/365 re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We will brand the capability of niches to generate. We think that most revolutionary, world-class, virtual portals use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 content and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without nano-co-branded micro-clicks-and-mortar content, you will lack interfaces. What does it really mean to synthesize "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our 60/24/7/365, seamless technologies but our power to integrate. We will monetize the aptitude of e-tailers to benchmark. Think efficient. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The subscriber-defined raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We here at Initech realize that it is better to unleash vertically than to leverage globally. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? We will expand our power to generate without decrementing our ability to reinvent. The content factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without development, you will lack micro-relationships. Do you have a plan to become sexy? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think macro-integrated. What does it really mean to strategize "robustly"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our content but our capacity to leverage. At Initech, we believe we know how to engage cyber-nano-intra-transparently. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term long-term, client-focused channels and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you redefine dynamically, you may have to drive holistically. What does the commonly-used buzzword "innovative" really mean? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be visionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PGP. We will seize the power of methodologies to morph. We think we know that it is better to brand cyber-holistically than to seize seamlessly.