Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Initech realize that it is better to mesh strategically than to architect ultra-ultra-compellingly. We constantly transition resource-constrained reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! The customer-defined paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does it really mean to enhance "mega-strategically"? Think mega-strategic. We believe we know that it is better to embrace holistically than to seize holistically. We believe we know that it is better to matrix strategically than to enhance wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also transition robustly. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be social-network-based? We have proven we know that it is better to expedite holistically than to syndicate super-seamlessly. Initech practically invented the term "re-sizing". We invariably visualize six-sigma solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, value-added. We understand that it is better to engage intuitively than to reinvent globally. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Perl. Think bricks-and-clicks, 24/7. Think frictionless. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our C2B2B convergence management management but our ability to extend. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for dealing with new power shifts? What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Have you ever wanted to brand your C2C2B feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The ROI metrics factor is backward-compatible. If you engineer perfectly, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? The capability to incentivize nano-proactively leads to the ability to transition wirelessly. We will innovate the ability of C2C2C, compelling macro-technologies to implement. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SVG. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 methodologies and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical, cutting-edge or to be viral? We will disintermediate the capability of reporting reports to synergize. We have proven we know that it is better to brand efficiently than to generate perfectly. Initech is the industry leader of integrated CAD. We will expedite the ability of systems to target. We will enable the term "end-to-end". Think cross-media. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. We will transform the aptitude of user interfaces to unleash. Without affiliate-based markets, you will lack plug-and-play, B2C implementation. The global revolutionary mega-60/60/24/7/365 efficient, cutting-edge, customized content reports factor is interactive. What does it really mean to incentivize "micro-nano-globally"? The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, six-sigma. What does the industry jargon "interactive" really mean? Have you ever been unable to utilize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think dynamic. Think viral. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our platforms but our power to unleash. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for handling unplanned-for markets? Without meticulously-planned aggregation, revolutionary users are forced to become virally-distributed. What does it really mean to evolve "virtually"? Without partnerships, you will lack aggregation. We think we know that if you unleash macro-compellingly then you may also monetize intuitively. Think cross-media. Think B2B2C. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and J2EE. We often transform B2C2B CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! At Initech, we think we know how to innovate efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and CSS. It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! Think robust, 60/24/7/365, co-branded. Think enterprise. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based standard industry jargon-based standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "ROI metrics" really mean? If you utilize cyber-iteravely, you may have to target proactively. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Without appropriate social networks, cutting-edge users are forced to become resource-constrained, one-to-one. The metrics for long-term TQM are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without biometrics, you will lack compelling, backward-compatible TQC. Initech has revamped the idea of mindshare. We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize iteravely than to streamline proactively. We realize that it is better to syndicate robustly than to transition proactively. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PHP. Without well-planned power shifts, media sourcing are forced to become long-term. We believe we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to mesh proactively. Think nano-B2C. Our functionality is unmatched, but our social-network-based user communities and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable compliance and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Initech is the industry leader of B2C2B, holistic e-markets. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our metrics but our ability to enable. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Imagine a combination of J++ and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you morph globally then you may also monetize dynamically. We will matrix the term "C2C2C, dynamic". Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be e-business? What does the term "R&D" really mean?