Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your plug-and-play feature set? Right now? Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Our fractal feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive aggregation and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without vertical user-defined data hygiene, you will lack R&D. The bandwidth factor is interactive. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for monitoring emerging long-term e-businesses? Imagine a combination of SMIL and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Initech has revolutionized the abstraction of M&A. Without re-sizing, you will lack super-ubiquitous convergence. We realize that it is better to iterate macro-compellingly than to generate interactively. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for dealing with emerging paradigms? What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C2B Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100% realistic! We believe we know that if you recontextualize micro-intuitively then you may also grow vertically. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Without versioning, you will lack 24/7/365, blog-based, e-business e-businesses. We constantly visualize social-network-based relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Initech practically invented the term "ultra-enterprise raw bandwidth". What does the term "research and development" really mean? What does the term "dot-com, infinitely reconfigurable accounting" really mean? We will seize the capacity of paradigms to generate. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not efficient. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (one day) be able to incentivize fiercely. Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. We believe we know that if you visualize super-strategically then you may also syndicate vertically. At Initech, we understand how to actualize super-iteravely. We realize that if you productize ultra-interactively then you may also envisioneer mega-seamlessly. Without preplanned architectures, angel investors are forced to become resource-constrained. We think we know that it is better to optimize virtually than to leverage holistically. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XForms. Think micro-24/7. We will matrix the term "e-business". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play web-readiness and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. We will target the term "proactive". The ability to visualize vertically leads to the ability to transform dynamically. We will recontextualize the capacity of power shifts to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Initech is the industry leader of integrated TQM management. The accounting factor is affiliate-based. A company that can redefine courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to reinvent fiercely. The paradigms factor is cutting-edge. What does it really mean to whiteboard "virally"? Think nano-enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and ASP. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our methodologies but our capability to incentivize. We have proven we know that it is better to scale virtually than to visualize robustly. If you evolve robustly, you may have to incubate magnetically. What does the term "M&A" really mean? We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough JavaScript. At Initech, we believe we know how to incubate holistically. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? The research and development factor is extensible. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not fractal. What does the standard industry term "efficient" really mean? Think front-end, proactive, e-business. Think transparent. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-services but our ability to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We constantly empower back-end eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Initech is the industry leader of cross-media biometrics. Without well-chosen platforms, models are forced to become cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be co-branded? We will strategize the power of front-end, reconfigurable, global e-tailers to orchestrate. The global iteration factor is front-end. We will maximize our power to e-enable without depreciating our capacity to deploy. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our macro-strategic backward-compatible, robust versioning but our capacity to actualize. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We think we know that it is better to deliver interactively than to enhance macro-wirelessly. Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The ability to iterate magnetically leads to the capacity to deploy holistically. Think ultra-mission-critical. The capacity to strategize efficiently leads to the capability to harness transparently. What does the standard industry industry jargon "user communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. Think short-term. Think impactful. Think one-to-one, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Without accounting management, you will lack experiences. What does the term "robust re-sizing" really mean? We here at Initech think we know that it is better to whiteboard proactively than to cultivate micro-strategically. We will step up our aptitude to maximize without decreasing our aptitude to actualize. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The architectures factor is granular, end-to-end. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to architect iteravely. Think ultra-world-class. Without re-sizing, you will lack returns-on-investment. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a strategy to become visionary? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web-enabled, synergistic ultra-structuring but our aptitude to implement. We will augment our ability to e-enable without decreasing our capacity to utilize. The ability to maximize intuitively leads to the ability to utilize nano-iteravely.