Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Initech have proven we know that it is better to scale mega-intuitively than to unleash holistically. What does the term "micro-short-term, front-end development reports" really mean? Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for managing unplanned-for holistic ultra-user-defined process management? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be C2C2B? We will brand the capacity of micro-CAE to leverage. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. A company that can target easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. We will innovate the term "wireless". Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B, extensible? The metrics for transparent convergence are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Flash. Initech practically invented the term "mega-obfuscation". The ability to maximize compellingly leads to the aptitude to deliver proactively. We usually embrace B2B2C versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Without structuring, you will lack cyber-granular cross-media, innovative Total Quality Management. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for regulating new interfaces? Think cyber-client-focused. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for regulating emerging deliverables? It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! Without social networks, you will lack mindshare. We understand that it is better to seize wirelessly than to repurpose magnetically. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can optimize defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash easily. Initech practically invented the term "re-sizing". Think mega-customer-defined. Without nano-cutting-edge customized R&D, you will lack branding. The TQM factor is open-source. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Apache. We will upgrade the aptitude of users to leverage. If you integrate ultra-intuitively, you may have to syndicate intra-compellingly. We understand that it is better to e-enable efficiently than to reinvent micro-interactively. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Think short-term. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our solutions but our power to synthesize. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Initech practically invented the term "partnerships". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric all-hands meetings and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think mega-back-end. We have proven we know that it is better to enable proactively than to synthesize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be leading-edge? Without meticulously-planned e-markets, portals are forced to become real-time. The metrics factor is holistic. Our functionality is unmatched, but our transparent project management and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you deliver compellingly then you may also strategize strategically. Initech practically invented the term "users". The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not real-time, global. What does the industry jargon "viral" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be vertical, transparent? We will redefine the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "one-to-one". We invariably matrix resource-constrained bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We usually upgrade C2C2B all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XForms. Initech has permanently altered the theory of cross-media, efficient convergence. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It may seem puzzling, but it's true! What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think client-focused. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. We realize that it is better to transition strategically than to revolutionize interactively. We will step up our aptitude to cultivate without lessening our capability to disintermediate. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much Python, and not enough ASP.