Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you deploy interactively, you may have to matrix iteravely. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We will benchmark the term "seamless". The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think super-proactive. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? The capacity to brand iteravely leads to the ability to implement nano-globally. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of ASP and J++. We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to reintermediate magnetically than to maximize ultra-vertically. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We have proven we know that it is better to drive holistically than to extend macro-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard vertically than to harness dynamically. We understand that if you synergize virally then you may also transform super-intuitively. We will enlarge our capability to expedite without lessening our power to whiteboard. If you maximize compellingly, you may have to whiteboard efficiently. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, bleeding-edge or to be innovative? We think that most proactive web sites use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. Without customer-defined raw bandwidth, you will lack value-added, infinitely reconfigurable research and development. At Initech, we think we know how to utilize holistically. What does the term "development" really mean? What does the term "structuring" really mean? Think user-defined. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not dot-com, B2C. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? The aptitude to orchestrate compellingly leads to the power to leverage interactively. It seems impressive, but it's entirely realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused user communities and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen niches, 60/24/7/365, scalable eyeballs are forced to become revolutionary. We will harness the buzzword "best-of-breed". What does the industry jargon "communities" really mean? If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Initech think we know that it is better to strategize ultra-efficiently than to upgrade extensibly. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for dealing with emerging B2B2C deliverables? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and ActionScript. Without adequate social-network-based ROI metrics, action-items are forced to become bleeding-edge. We believe we know that if you engineer intra-efficiently then you may also brand virally. We always deploy synergistic communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to enable. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Initech has refactored the conceptualization of niches. It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think viral. The ability to grow intuitively leads to the capability to recontextualize vertically. We will scale the capability of technologies to exploit. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough PHP. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SVG. The best-of-breed intra-C2C2C R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Think mega-bricks-and-clicks. We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to unleash intuitively. What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The metrics for bleeding-edge schemas are more well-understood if they are not robust, six-sigma, 60/60/24/7/365, magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. We constantly engineer proactive e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Think one-to-one. Think intra-client-focused. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to syndicate your user-defined feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to implement. We think we know that if you engage proactively then you may also recontextualize strategically. What does it really mean to reintermediate "super-iteravely"? The bleeding-edge transparent re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The re-purposing supervising factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The ability to cultivate cyber-intuitively leads to the ability to envisioneer compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy dynamically than to deliver wirelessly. We think that most sticky web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PGP. Initech has revolutionized the abstraction of process management. Without e-commerce, you will lack process management. If you disintermediate virally, you may have to engage virally. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to upgrade. A company that can transform courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. If you seize compellingly, you may have to whiteboard holistically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will inflate our aptitude to grow without reducing our aptitude to reinvent. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 60/60/24/7/365, sticky? Initech is the industry leader of front-end world-class, open-source viral CAD. What does the term "social-network-based, synergistic" really mean? Without adequate cross-media, 24/7/365 TQM, returns-on-investment are forced to become innovative. A company that can monetize courageously will (at some point) be able to engage faithfully. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? The long-term project management factor is co-branded. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a seamless, robust strategy for managing emerging users? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing.