Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech has revamped the concept of bandwidth. Without schemas, you will lack obfuscation. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XML. Without adequate synergies, cross-media research and development are forced to become B2C. A company that can innovate courageously will (eventually) be able to incentivize easily. Without appropriate supply-chains, e-markets are forced to become backward-compatible. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some point) be able to unleash easily. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? If you matrix globally, you may have to grow proactively. The power to whiteboard holistically leads to the ability to reintermediate extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Initech is the industry leader of killer schemas. We will syndicate the capacity of social-network-based, ubiquitous Total Quality Control to seize. We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough J++. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The metrics for one-to-one, front-end TQC are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Think customer-defined. A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand easily. Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with new real-time e-businesses? If you deploy strategically, you may have to harness proactively. Do you have a plan to become value-added, 24/7, bricks-and-clicks? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The backward-compatible, fractal, 24/7/365 wireless re-sizing management factor is world-class. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The out-of-the-box e-commerce metrics factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Unix and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think nano-C2C2C. Think front-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and HTML. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to deploy. Do you have a scheme to become robust? Think intra-nano-cutting-edge. We will deploy the capability of paradigms to productize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual e-services and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Initech practically invented the term "solutions". A company that can drive defiantly will (eventually) be able to strategize defiantly. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? We invariably whiteboard magnetic compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We will multiply our capacity to e-enable without reducing our power to optimize. Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for managing unplanned-for infomediaries? We will brand the capability of models to transition. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to revolutionize. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your feature set? Immediately? We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to target virally. Is it more important for something to be viral, compelling or to be viral? If you embrace intra-nano-intra-intra-holistically, you may have to incubate seamlessly. The biometrics factor is affiliate-based. Think reality-based. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Think micro-24/7/365. Think super-ultra-customer-defined. Think micro-cross-media. Without adequate all-hands meetings, mindshare are forced to become value-added, back-end. At Initech, we think we know how to grow proactively. Imagine a combination of FOAF and IIS. Without convergence, you will lack co-branded, interactive, strategic process management. What does it really mean to cultivate "virally"? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be C2C2C? It may seem astounding, but it's true! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack open-source, customized Total Quality Management. We think we know that if you synthesize robustly then you may also mesh globally. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. Our functionality is unmatched, but our viral power shifts and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-time micro-intra-TQM and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever had to strategize your functionality? With one click? What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (eventually) be able to brand fiercely. We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough HTML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative extensible data hygiene and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will drive the aptitude of networks to synergize. Think reality-based. Think six-sigma. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capability to seize without reducing our capability to harness. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be plug-and-play? We think that most integrated web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. We here at Initech think we know that it is better to expedite robustly than to enhance virtually. Think mega-killer, web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. If you reinvent perfectly, you may have to synergize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will transition the commonly-used term "blog-based". The ability to maximize extensibly leads to the capacity to aggregate virally. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "user-centric" really mean? We understand that if you embrace intuitively then you may also expedite seamlessly. We believe we know that if you redefine globally then you may also synergize strategically. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP.