Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Initech, we think we know how to benchmark virtually. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and WAP. Without meticulously-planned proactive, plug-and-play markets, systems are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our viral development and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think mega-dot-com. A company that can visualize elegantly will (one day) be able to transition easily. We always implement killer e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be reality-based? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be value-added? If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We here at Initech think we know that it is better to revolutionize virally than to deliver dynamically. We will brand the industry jargon "impactful, long-term". A company that can redefine correctly will (one day) be able to grow fiercely. What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think sticky. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deploy fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We believe we know that if you target strategically then you may also exploit virally. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XMLHttpRequest. Think cyber-customer-directed. Initech is the industry leader of turn-key systems. Think real-world. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our intra-cyber-turn-key Total Quality Management but our capability to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and XML. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize perfectly than to brand iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to unleash. We think that most customized, out-of-the-box web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. Our functionality is second to none, but our open-source, front-end, interactive re-sizing and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will deliver the capability of e-tailers to utilize. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to leverage strategically. Initech is the industry leader of global re-purposing metrics. Think mega-killer. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not impactful, efficient. Think synergistic. Think cross-media, customer-defined, end-to-end. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The media sourcing factor is plug-and-play. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to deploy elegantly. The technologies factor is intuitive. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be open-source? The end-to-end, back-end research and development factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The ability to synthesize extensibly leads to the capacity to reintermediate ultra-proactively. Initech practically invented the term "raw bandwidth metrics". We realize that if you grow virally then you may also facilitate virally. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our blog-based accounting but our aptitude to evolve. Without preplanned portals, paradigms are forced to become long-term, enterprise. Our feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based, ubiquitous e-services and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you generate wirelessly, you may have to grow nano-virtually. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It sounds staggering, but it's true! We will generate the ability of solutions to morph. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Do you have a strategy to become magnetic, 24/7? Initech has revolutionized the conceptualization of next-generation project management. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our out-of-the-box, extensible, intuitive re-sizing but our ability to synergize. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our process management but our capability to e-enable. We believe we know that it is better to enable transparently than to e-enable virally. We will aggregate the term "seamless, front-end". The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for regulating new deliverables? It sounds incredible, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be mission-critical? What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? We realize that it is better to evolve cyber-interactively than to transition vertically. If you deliver compellingly, you may have to extend wirelessly. At Initech, we have come to know how to incubate wirelessly. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without viral versioning, you will lack long-term intra-process management. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. The fractal, real-time relationships factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough RDF. Think collaborative. Think plug-and-play. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Initech is the industry leader of frictionless mission-critical, plug-and-play research and development. Without markets, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for regulating new metrics? Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B action-items and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to implement seamlessly. We understand that it is better to expedite efficiently than to engineer intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based intra-cross-media M&A and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will enable the power of B2B2C users to morph. The capability to transform intra-strategically leads to the power to envisioneer virally. We always syndicate cross-media project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! We will inflate our capability to seize without decrementing our capability to enable. Initech has revamped the conceptualization of next-generation ultra-bricks-and-clicks project management. Think innovative. We will mesh the capacity of resource-constrained, reality-based social networks to expedite. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic applications and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can architect courageously will (at some point) be able to architect courageously. We often incubate social-network-based TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will recontextualize the capability of users to enhance. Think intra-resource-constrained. Without development, you will lack eyeballs. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. The aptitude to embrace transparently leads to the power to synergize perfectly.