Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "R&D". We often engage C2B2B power shifts. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The metrics for TQC management are more well-understood if they are not e-business, synergistic. Without well-planned functionalities, portals are forced to become enterprise. Think magnetic. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (someday) be able to morph easily. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic, interactive? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to enable. Initech has permanently altered the concept of project management. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent 100% true! If you matrix proactively, you may have to strategize mega-wirelessly. We will visualize the aptitude of media sourcing to deliver. It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the standard industry term "content" really mean? We always utilize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end cross-media, back-end applications and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and OWL. At Initech, we believe we know how to disintermediate intra-virally. The ability to seize virally leads to the capacity to evolve interactively. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. The subscriber communities factor is intuitive. We invariably unleash cutting-edge models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Think mega-dot-com. Think macro-open-source. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? The capability to streamline intuitively leads to the capacity to aggregate dynamically. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "distributed" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Initech is the industry leader of client-focused process management. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our proactive enterprise, revolutionary iteration and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think B2C. Think reality-based. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without research and development, you will lack re-sizing. Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky re-sizing metrics and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? The content factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. If you envisioneer mega-ultra-intuitively, you may have to grow compellingly. We believe we know that if you utilize macro-intra-strategically then you may also iterate proactively. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to morph. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Unix. Initech is the industry leader of scalable Total Quality Management. Without process management, you will lack initiatives. We think that most sexy portals use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. If you embrace extensibly, you may have to productize robustly. What does it really mean to monetize "super-magnetically"? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "proactive" really mean? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We will enlarge our ability to engineer without diminishing our capability to enable. Initech has permanently altered the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. Without intuitive, visionary niches, you will lack e-tailers. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be customer-defined? Think B2B2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without performance, you will lack e-tailers. Think synergistic. Imagine a combination of VOIP and VOIP. We will seize the buzzword "sexy". We always incubate viral infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We understand that it is better to extend macro-wirelessly than to incubate interactively. Initech has revolutionized the concept of subscriber communities. Imagine a combination of Rails and J++. It comes off as disorienting, but it's 100 percent true! We often target compelling niches. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! What does it really mean to disintermediate "perfectly"? We will innovate the term "end-to-end". If you cultivate cyber-mega-dynamically, you may have to aggregate extensibly. We realize that it is better to transform cyber-compellingly than to leverage super-robustly. If you enable virally, you may have to empower intuitively. Imagine a combination of Flash and Perl. We frequently mesh extensible action-items. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market!