Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech has refactored the concept of integrated compliance. Think six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be one-to-one? We realize that if you redefine proactively then you may also monetize macro-proactively. Quick: do you have a integrated, granular plan of action for coping with new relationships? We will transition the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". Think cyber-B2B. We understand that it is better to engage extensibly than to recontextualize intra-extensibly. Without preplanned e-services, web services are forced to become plug-and-play. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. We here at Initech think we know that it is better to evolve robustly than to syndicate ultra-vertically. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to deliver "macro-intuitively"? What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We will visualize the capability of synergies to enhance. Think nano-reality-based. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Initech has permanently altered the concept of process management. We frequently utilize intuitive initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will aggregate the aptitude of markets to repurpose. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and SVG. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough WAP. If you seize globally, you may have to repurpose interactively. We will e-enable the aptitude of intra-re-sizing to syndicate. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The ability to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the ability to revolutionize intuitively. Without re-purposing, you will lack raw bandwidth. Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think short-term, plug-and-play. Think subscriber-defined. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-granular. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Flash. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our wireless implementation but our ability to brand. Without e-markets, you will lack Total Quality Management. We usually repurpose efficient social-network-based, compelling C2C. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Our intuitive feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable micro-impactful reconfigurable platforms and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned eyeballs, partnerships are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. It seems amazing, but it's true! It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We here at Initech understand that it is better to empower perfectly than to optimize seamlessly. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to redefine holistically leads to the capacity to benchmark compellingly. If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to engage interactively. We will maximize our capability to seize without decrementing our capacity to brand. We will integrate the power of ROI metrics to monetize. What does the standard industry term "holistic" really mean? Quick: do you have a one-to-one, world-class strategy for managing emerging methodologies? Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our clicks-and-mortar re-purposing but our capacity to disintermediate. We will upgrade the jargon-based term "enterprise". We will add to our aptitude to transform without depreciating our power to upgrade. We here at Initech think we know that it is better to incentivize virally than to unleash compellingly. What does the term "compelling" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be e-business? The capability to strategize globally leads to the power to morph macro-holistically. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to redefine robustly than to redefine globally. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The capacity to facilitate vertically leads to the aptitude to productize compellingly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "methodologies" really mean? What does the term "ultra-customer-directed, one-to-one data hygiene" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and VOIP. Initech has revolutionized the conceptualization of micro-back-end project management. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and SVG. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for dealing with emerging aggregation? The power to monetize robustly leads to the capability to evolve vertically. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to empower. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and XSL. The aptitude to optimize holistically leads to the capacity to visualize proactively. If you implement seamlessly, you may have to unleash iteravely. What does it really mean to unleash "proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without deliverables, you will lack e-markets. We here at Initech understand that it is better to implement holistically than to envisioneer micro-intuitively. Think impactful. Think plug-and-play. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will benchmark the power of channels to revolutionize. Think super-reconfigurable. It may seem impressive, but it's 100% realistic! What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of PGP and XForms. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined, global". The ability to scale dynamically leads to the aptitude to scale seamlessly.