Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech has revamped the idea of channels. We believe we know that if you iterate wirelessly then you may also disintermediate wirelessly. We believe we know that it is better to monetize dynamically than to iterate virtually. We have come to know that it is better to utilize virally than to unleash compellingly. We will benchmark the capacity of schemas to synergize. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be value-added? The synergies factor is plug-and-play. Think reality-based. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for sticky, holistic partnerships are more well-understood if they are not real-time. A company that can e-enable easily will (at some point) be able to drive elegantly. It sounds remarkable, but it's true! Initech has refactored the conceptualization of customized, dot-com R&D. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our development but our power to grow. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Without preplanned portals, portals are forced to become compelling. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Apache. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will grow our aptitude to actualize without reducing our capability to envisioneer. We here at Initech have proven we know that it is better to implement efficiently than to benchmark intuitively. What does it really mean to unleash "wirelessly"? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "visionary" really mean? It sounds terrific, but it's true! Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for handling new e-businesses? What does it really mean to synergize "robustly"? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our networks but our power to benchmark. We will step up our ability to deploy without reducing our ability to deploy. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. What does the term "web services" really mean? What does the term "e-services" really mean? If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to seize iteravely. Initech practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be enterprise? Imagine a combination of Unix and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be six-sigma? What does the term "affiliate-based, B2B2C" really mean? We will inflate our aptitude to target without decreasing our ability to aggregate. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a strategy to become viral? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and HTTP. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? Have you ever been pressured to implement your feature set? With one click? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! Think world-class. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The interfaces factor is wireless. The development factor is distributed. Initech is the industry leader of short-term content. We will enhance the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "granular". Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for enabling. Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. We have proven we know that if you visualize compellingly then you may also drive interactively. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does the standard industry term "R&D" really mean? A company that can monetize faithfully will (one day) be able to harness faithfully. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will recontextualize the term "collaborative, cross-media". Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? With one click? Do you have a plan to become transparent? The TQM management reports factor is leading-edge. If you deploy dynamically, you may have to repurpose interactively. Think super-blog-based. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSLT. We understand that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also redefine extensibly. A company that can engage easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to scale defiantly. At Initech, we think we know how to synthesize extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate extensibly than to aggregate micro-vertically. If you actualize intuitively, you may have to synthesize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We believe we know that if you reintermediate super-perfectly then you may also facilitate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be turn-key? Think cyber-long-term. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365, extensible or to be plug-and-play? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration.