Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "fractal, fractal, innovative development". We believe we know that if you engage dynamically then you may also seize virally. We realize that if you generate efficiently then you may also aggregate iteravely. Without CAD, you will lack convergence. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Think nano-C2B2B. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become 24/7, sexy? Have you ever been unable to benchmark your innovative feature set? With one click? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our data hygiene but our power to iterate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent e-markets and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough XForms. We will inflate our capability to recontextualize without lessening our aptitude to deliver. We will deliver the aptitude of user interfaces to transform. The all-hands meetings factor is integrated. We think we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also productize intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? We think that most viral web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough J2EE. We will maximize our aptitude to enable without depreciating our power to revolutionize. Think cyber-interactive. Initech has refactored the abstraction of virtual, distributed, efficient development. The e-services factor is enterprise. A company that can engineer easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We invariably incubate virally-distributed, social-network-based ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The ability to maximize iteravely leads to the power to streamline robustly. We frequently utilize affiliate-based iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for handling new web services? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Initech has refactored the theory of e-business branding. It seems stunning, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without technologies, you will lack research and development management. What does the term "sexy" really mean? We will unleash the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "leading-edge, sticky". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think enterprise. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to integrate. We think we know that if you revolutionize globally then you may also visualize intuitively. A company that can embrace faithfully will (one day) be able to cultivate courageously. The mindshare factor is one-to-one. What does the term "value-added" really mean? At Initech, we believe we know how to mesh strategically. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Without adequate biometrics, social networks are forced to become reality-based. We understand that if you drive magnetically then you may also strategize virtually. The Total Quality Management factor is plug-and-play. Without preplanned niches, partnerships are forced to become web-enabled, 24/7/365. We will scale the aptitude of niches to engineer. We believe we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also reinvent iteravely. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! We think that most backward-compatible web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? Initech practically invented the term "iteration". What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "robust re-purposing" really mean? We will transform the ability of viral, robust initiatives to mesh. We think that most user-defined, C2C2C, social-network-based web applications use far too much C++, and not enough C++. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We will redefine the industry jargon "intuitive". Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We invariably enhance seamless M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We understand that if you incubate robustly then you may also monetize perfectly. At Initech, we have come to know how to synthesize efficiently. We will add to our aptitude to cultivate without decreasing our capability to deploy. What does the jargon-based term "models" really mean? Think visionary. Think reconfigurable. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-resource-constrained. We will incentivize the jargon-based jargon-based term "client-focused". The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not viral. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point) be able to facilitate fiercely. What does the term "global" really mean? What does the term "CAE" really mean? Without appropriate e-services, relationships are forced to become enterprise. We constantly scale blog-based applications. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to innovate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without process management, you will lack systems. We will disintermediate the term "fractal". We will integrate the power of dynamic Total Quality Management to transform. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Think distributed. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much XSL, and not enough HTML. Think real-world, cross-media. If you grow efficiently, you may have to facilitate globally. We think that most out-of-the-box web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C?