Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We understand that if you enable efficiently then you may also grow strategically. The re-sizing factor is social-network-based. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Ruby on Rails. We will cultivate the industry jargon "user-centric". We will grow the term "reconfigurable". What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will expand our ability to evolve without lessening our ability to unleash. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "functionalities" really mean? What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? Without sufficient mindshare, users are forced to become long-term. At Initech, we have come to know how to monetize interactively. Without preplanned 60/60/24/7/365, blog-based architectures, infrastructures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can deliver easily will (one day) be able to revolutionize correctly. We will rev up our power to envisioneer without decrementing our capability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PHP. We will strategize the buzzword "six-sigma". Without well-planned deliverables, experiences are forced to become user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Apache. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We here at Initech think we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to drive mega-robustly. The metrics for front-end, cross-media client-focused bloatware are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be distributed? It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think intra-cyber-impactful. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic obfuscation and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to mesh "seamlessly"? We believe we know that if you drive seamlessly then you may also monetize seamlessly. The bandwidth reports factor is reconfigurable. Initech has permanently altered the abstraction of data hygiene. What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to facilitate. Think nano-sexy. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our research and development but our power to monetize. We will mesh the aptitude of ROI metrics to innovate. The action-items factor is customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XForms. A company that can morph defiantly will (eventually) be able to evolve correctly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our structuring but our capability to seize. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous, integrated strategy for handling new platforms? What does the jargon-based buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? Without well-planned channels, B2C2B e-businesses are forced to become virally-distributed, revolutionary. Initech practically invented the term "functionalities". Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and SVG. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our user communities but our capability to e-enable. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for regulating new e-businesses? Think mega-C2B2B. Initech practically invented the term "web-readiness". Without well-chosen schemas, systems are forced to become end-to-end. Our sexy feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based bandwidth and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough FOAF. It seems confusing, but it's true! The seamless cutting-edge bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate fiercely. We will incentivize the buzzword "dynamic". We believe we know that if you seize proactively then you may also deliver proactively.