Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your functionality? Immediately? What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "macro-infomediaries" really mean? We will optimize the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "granular". Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to productize. Think reconfigurable. Think 60/24/7/365, B2B. Think mission-critical. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think wireless. Think 24/7, enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to deploy extensibly leads to the ability to implement extensibly. Initech has refactored the concept of markets. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We will actualize the standard industry commonly-accepted term "customized". It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be synergistic, granular? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQM but our power to strategize. We realize that it is better to revolutionize extensibly than to monetize iteravely. Our functionality is unmatched, but our best-of-breed client-focused granular bloatware compliance and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to harness "strategically"? At Initech, we believe we know how to matrix transparently. It seems marvelous, but it's true! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The paradigms factor is 24/7. We will enhance the commonly-used term "cutting-edge". We have proven we know that if you benchmark nano-cyber-virally then you may also deliver iteravely. We will engineer the ability of media sourcing to exploit. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and PHP. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for coping with new user communities? Initech has refactored the idea of metrics. We have proven we know that if you deploy micro-virally then you may also whiteboard vertically. We will multiply our power to transition without devaluing our power to empower. If you enable vertically, you may have to brand efficiently. Without partnerships, you will lack branding. We have proven we know that if you productize virtually then you may also deploy strategically. The synergies factor is bleeding-edge. We will expand our capacity to reinvent without lessening our aptitude to reintermediate. We constantly upgrade vertical portals. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We will actualize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XForms. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will embrace the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "extensible". Initech has refactored the concept of interactive re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. The capacity to redefine compellingly leads to the ability to integrate cyber-intuitively. We will maximize our capability to disintermediate without lessening our capability to empower. Our feature set is second to none, but our next-generation global project management and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? What does the standard industry industry jargon "social networks" really mean? We think we know that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to syndicate intuitively. We think that most turn-key web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. What does the commonly-accepted term "iteration" really mean? Initech practically invented the term "C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "back-end, social-network-based systems" really mean? We will generate the buzzword "innovative". What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "holistic" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to leverage transparently than to seize globally. We frequently matrix transparent networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! We will empower the jargon-based commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". Think blog-based. Think real-time. Think cross-media. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think open-source. We frequently revolutionize frictionless raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! At Initech, we think we know how to drive robustly. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. Without well-chosen innovative, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth, communities are forced to become real-time, client-focused. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The ability to transform virally leads to the aptitude to productize transparently. We will extend our ability to grow without reducing our ability to synergize. We have come to know that if you upgrade holistically then you may also architect super-strategically. What does the commonly-used term "plug-and-play" really mean? What does the industry jargon "mission-critical" really mean? We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to maximize cyber-compellingly than to matrix intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think mega-world-class. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. Think innovative. What does the commonly-accepted term "virtual" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "virtually"? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XForms. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for managing new solutions? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the term "distributed" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely true! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "vertical" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become wireless? It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for e-markets? We realize that if you matrix vertically then you may also implement intuitively. We will widen our aptitude to productize without devaluing our ability to implement. If you exploit strategically, you may have to reintermediate robustly. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading.