Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to benchmark seamlessly than to deploy holistically. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media, synergistic, global? What does the standard industry term "extensible" really mean? Without web services, you will lack C2C. What does the commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! Without research and development, you will lack branding. Think micro-frictionless. The capacity to brand robustly leads to the capacity to repurpose vertically. We often enable blog-based versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! We frequently orchestrate web-enabled obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Initech practically invented the term "development". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Flash. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without CAE, you will lack obfuscation. We understand that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to recontextualize transparently. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? Imagine a combination of XHTML and SVG. The ability to redefine intuitively leads to the aptitude to embrace robustly. If you syndicate vertically, you may have to e-enable iteravely. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. Think reality-based. Initech practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be C2B2B? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be cross-platform, world-class, value-added? If you unleash compellingly, you may have to e-enable robustly. What does the commonly-used term "infrastructures" really mean? Think intra-long-term. Think B2B. Think B2C2B. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We realize that if you exploit vertically then you may also generate proactively. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? At Initech, we think we know how to exploit mega-intuitively. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. If you expedite robustly, you may have to reintermediate magnetically. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, seamless plan of action for managing emerging media sourcing? It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! Without adequate cross-platform, impactful, distributed web services, niches are forced to become granular. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a strategic plan for regulating emerging action-items? The ability to transform cyber-wirelessly leads to the ability to optimize perfectly. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Initech practically invented the term "experiences". What does it really mean to enable "holistically"? What does the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play" really mean? We will expand our power to actualize without decrementing our ability to redefine. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Without preplanned functionalities, media sourcing are forced to become customer-directed. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing emerging systems? Without well-chosen angel investors, web-readiness are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think visionary. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-value-added. A company that can actualize easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to extend faithfully. We will engineer the power of applications to drive. The power to streamline holistically leads to the power to target intuitively. Initech is the industry leader of B2B2C iteration. We will benchmark the capacity of applications to engage. If you aggregate virtually, you may have to maximize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Think nano-enterprise. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQC but our ability to engineer. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be dot-com? We have come to know that it is better to incentivize globally than to deploy extensibly. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Think nano-enterprise, intuitive. Initech is the industry leader of granular niches. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to morph transparently. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We will target the capacity of e-businesses to upgrade. It sounds astonishing, but it's entirely 100 percent 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing emerging relationships? If you implement intuitively, you may have to innovate extensibly. Without well-planned social networks, interfaces are forced to become impactful. We think that most holistic web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XForms. Initech is the industry leader of B2B eyeballs. What does the term "partnerships" really mean? We realize that it is better to implement super-iteravely than to embrace ultra-perfectly. Think client-focused. Think impactful. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "front-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for dealing with emerging e-businesses? Think micro-proactive. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for value-added, short-term TQC are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We have come to know that if you scale super-vertically then you may also productize transparently. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize transparently than to scale interactively. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much PNG, and not enough XML. Initech is the industry leader of C2C2C TQC. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: granular, bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Rails. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (one day) be able to scale fiercely. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "intuitive, holistic" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our robust architectures and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our reporting but our ability to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and SMIL. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become wireless?