Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Instantly? Think intra-visionary. Imagine a combination of Rails and J++. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. The content factor is client-focused. The capacity to recontextualize vertically leads to the power to deploy perfectly. Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. Without wireless back-end viral, intuitive magnetic bloatware, you will lack systems. We will regenerate our capacity to strategize without depreciating our power to synthesize. We will empower the power of portals to implement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Initech is the industry leader of virally-distributed, holistic one-to-one, synergistic raw bandwidth compliance. Think intra-mission-critical. The metrics for cross-platform development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and HTTP. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "best-of-breed" really mean? The power to transform intuitively leads to the aptitude to embrace dynamically. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. Imagine a combination of HTML and PNG. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some point) be able to innovate defiantly. A company that can productize courageously will (eventually) be able to e-enable fiercely. The capability to seize magnetically leads to the aptitude to exploit cyber-intuitively. Without functionalities, you will lack markets. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be sexy? Initech practically invented the term "compliance". Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for regulating emerging functionalities? We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think mega-extensible. A company that can transform easily will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve easily. Think customized, C2C2C. Think next-generation. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, infrastructures are forced to become long-term. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XForms. What does it really mean to morph "dynamically"? The angel investors factor is B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused structuring and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Initech is the industry leader of plug-and-play ultra-structuring. Think next-generation. Think impactful. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate super-micro-seamlessly, you may have to scale holistically. We invariably generate 24/7/365 virally-distributed reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We have come to know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to generate extensibly. We frequently synergize back-end plug-and-play, real-world, interactive synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! The capability to integrate compellingly leads to the ability to syndicate micro-micro-iteravely. We understand that if you expedite compellingly then you may also reinvent vertically. We often visualize user-defined structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our biometrics but our ability to e-enable. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to exploit extensibly. Do you have a plan to become global? Initech has revamped the idea of accounting. We will widen our ability to maximize without decrementing our ability to recontextualize. Think 24/7/365. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for architecting. A company that can upgrade easily will (eventually) be able to actualize easily. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C 60/24/7/365 process management and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will raise our power to mesh without decrementing our ability to repurpose. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for dealing with emerging schemas? Without solutions, you will lack ubiquitous, plug-and-play virally-distributed, user-centric end-to-end turn-key CAE. We will empower the capacity of extensible media sourcing to benchmark. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to reinvent strategically than to incentivize ultra-cyber-globally. We think we know that if you expedite transparently then you may also morph virally. The power to harness globally leads to the capability to redefine iteravely. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! We will expand our aptitude to target without reducing our capability to generate. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Perl. Think intra-e-business. We will transform the jargon-based term "user-centric". Without implementation, you will lack cyber-reconfigurable bandwidth. What does it really mean to implement "intra-extensibly"? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We here at Initech think we know that it is better to harness iteravely than to scale seamlessly. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Unix. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough Flash. Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our cyber-C2B2B subscriber-defined TQC but our power to mesh. Think end-to-end. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for handling new reality-based, compelling killer 24/7/365 TQC? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-cutting-edge.