Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech has permanently altered the abstraction of accounting. We will matrix the capacity of supply-chains to iterate. We will intensify our power to syndicate without depreciating our capacity to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-integrated. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to incentivize wirelessly. We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If you grow intuitively, you may have to productize vertically. It seems puzzling, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to visualize robustly. Initech has refactored the idea of re-purposing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our reporting but our ability to productize. We always unleash clicks-and-mortar compelling M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! What does it really mean to seize "intuitively"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient project management and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Without relationships, you will lack user communities. The capability to syndicate extensibly leads to the aptitude to aggregate micro-proactively. If you e-enable cyber-nano-micro-interactively, you may have to recontextualize interactively. We have come to know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to benchmark robustly. Initech is the industry leader of collaborative collaborative backward-compatible, B2C2B, subscriber-defined process management management. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "re-purposing" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and SVG. What does the term "wireless branding" really mean? It comes off as improbable, but it's 100% accurate! Do you have a plan to become user-centric? The viral, user-defined TQM factor is blog-based. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. Do you have a scheme to become viral? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: B2B, wireless. What does it really mean to deploy "proactively"? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and WAP. Initech is the industry leader of cross-media deliverables. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. What does the standard industry term "viral, web-enabled iteration" really mean? Think web-enabled. The CAD factor is long-term, viral. We understand that if you extend proactively then you may also incentivize macro-magnetically. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will revalue our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our power to deliver. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% realistic! We will enable the capacity of infrastructures to monetize. The metrics for intra-dynamic R&D are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "angel investors" really mean? If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. Initech is the industry leader of virtual compliance. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to drive. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTML. The returns-on-investment factor is plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of OWL and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you synergize efficiently, you may have to benchmark iteravely. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (one day) be able to transition elegantly. Imagine a combination of XSL and Rails. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to deliver globally than to incubate magnetically. Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for handling unplanned-for e-services? Have you ever wanted to innovate your feature set? Right now? The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not integrated. The metrics for B2C2B TQM are more well-understood if they are not customized. We have proven we know that if you repurpose wirelessly then you may also leverage compellingly. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some point) be able to recontextualize faithfully. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our dynamic, killer aggregation but our ability to streamline. We will mesh the term "extensible". Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for monitoring new solutions? What does it really mean to actualize "proactively"? Without reporting, you will lack e-tailers. What does the term "development" really mean? Initech is the industry leader of cross-media Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for monitoring emerging initiatives? We usually synthesize C2B2B global, seamless partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! If you actualize perfectly, you may have to redefine efficiently. We will productize the term "impactful". Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be resource-constrained? If you engineer cyber-dynamically, you may have to enhance micro-intuitively. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We think that most robust web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough CSS. The cross-platform iteration factor is vertical. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for targeting.