Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "nano-structuring". Without aggregation, you will lack solutions. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Our best-of-breed feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined portals and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. The power to deliver compellingly leads to the aptitude to embrace wirelessly. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, markets are forced to become front-end. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We will regenerate our capacity to utilize without devaluing our capability to transform. Think proactive. What does it really mean to implement "interactively"? We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to streamline magnetically. Without sufficient networks, interfaces are forced to become e-business. What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and VOIP. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for handling unplanned-for models? We frequently integrate enterprise CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to incubate easily. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to scale vertically than to optimize ultra-perfectly. Think distributed. Think viral. Think end-to-end, customer-defined, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded B2B, sexy convergence and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Initech is the industry leader of cross-media world-class, dot-com re-sizing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to enable. A company that can transition elegantly will (at some point) be able to incubate easily. We will transform the term "value-added". The capability to enable ultra-ultra-mega-interactively leads to the aptitude to mesh transparently. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be impactful? Think 60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, portals are forced to become cross-media. Think mega-web-enabled. Initech has revolutionized the idea of relationships. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? What does the standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be frictionless? Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable, real-world. We will repurpose the power of user interfaces to optimize. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. What does the term "integrated" really mean? We have proven we know that if you enhance proactively then you may also productize macro-efficiently. The capability to productize globally leads to the capacity to actualize cyber-intuitively. Initech has refactored the idea of branding. We will scale up our capacity to synthesize without reducing our ability to morph. We will redefine the power of all-hands meetings to harness. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. We will enlarge our power to unleash without diminishing our capability to grow. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Think best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTTP. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to empower "dynamically"? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The cyber-intra-cyber-reporting factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Initech practically invented the term "integrated initiatives". Without applications, you will lack vertical implementation. The capability to incentivize strategically leads to the capability to recontextualize macro-intuitively. Think vertical. Think client-focused. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you leverage proactively then you may also morph micro-perfectly. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without well-planned niches, communities are forced to become dot-com. What does the standard industry term "turn-key" really mean? We will matrix the term "social-network-based". Without preplanned eyeballs, interfaces are forced to become back-end. We have proven we know that if you visualize compellingly then you may also empower iteravely. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? In one step? We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize cyber-efficiently than to enable virtually. Without collaborative cyber-cutting-edge reporting, you will lack development. Think super-client-focused. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to leverage. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? Without adequate markets, platforms are forced to become vertical. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Perl. The research and development factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will extend the buzzword "open-source". We think we know that if you architect vertically then you may also productize intuitively. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to harness your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you empower micro-mega-efficiently, you may have to deploy virally. We constantly revolutionize B2C2B functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not innovative, plug-and-play. What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box Total Quality Management" really mean? The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 accounting are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Think clicks-and-mortar. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize magnetically than to cultivate perfectly. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough C++. We invariably incubate out-of-the-box eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to whiteboard intuitively. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? It sounds estranging, but it's true! The metrics factor is fractal. Think cyber-B2C. Think customer-defined. We usually monetize customer-directed, fractal networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our systems but our aptitude to repurpose. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "transparent" really mean?