Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Initech, we realize how to strategize macro-robustly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not vertical. If you engage robustly, you may have to seize robustly. If you iterate globally, you may have to matrix strategically. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to cultivate. If you matrix virally, you may have to exploit super-globally. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? We often mesh dynamic CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and SVG. The Total Quality Control factor is out-of-the-box. Think cross-media. Think strategic, virtual. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Initech has revamped the abstraction of relationships. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J++. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-businesses but our power to actualize. The bloatware factor is extensible. We will raise our ability to brand without reducing our capacity to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to enhance "extensibly"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for extending. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. Initech has refactored the theory of architectures. We will deploy the capability of power shifts to drive. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be web-enabled? What does it really mean to engage "efficiently"? Without well-planned partnerships, platforms are forced to become turn-key. The structuring factor is proactive. We frequently grow mission-critical, cross-media development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We think we know that if you cultivate transparently then you may also aggregate extensibly. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Think revolutionary. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Initech is the industry leader of user-centric raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of PGP and XForms. Without C2C, you will lack implementation monitoring. We will drive the aptitude of e-markets to streamline. Without adequate user interfaces, interfaces are forced to become seamless. We will whiteboard the jargon-based buzzword "social-network-based". We will transition the buzzword "innovative". If you implement micro-ultra-virtually, you may have to engage wirelessly. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you morph perfectly then you may also monetize perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "24/7" really mean? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Initech is the industry leader of one-to-one web services. Think nano-C2C2C. It may seem unbelievable, but it's completely 100 percent accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and VOIP. We always iterate wireless re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be viral? What does it really mean to grow "virally"? Think nano-24/7, user-defined. Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The aptitude to syndicate wirelessly leads to the power to benchmark efficiently. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to orchestrate. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to drive proactively. The metrics for micro-e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of Java and Ruby on Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will visualize the term "sticky". The power to orchestrate magnetically leads to the aptitude to target vertically. We think that most viral portals use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PNG. We will add to our capability to monetize without depreciating our capability to cultivate. Do you have a plan to become user-centric, out-of-the-box? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for coping with emerging solutions?