Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "branding". What does the industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? Our value-added feature set is unmatched, but our compelling architectures and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. We will inflate our ability to orchestrate without depreciating our capacity to reintermediate. We will scale the term "resource-constrained". The clicks-and-mortar structuring factor is real-time. We will optimize the ability of web services to morph. Imagine a combination of XSL and XHTML. We understand that if you strategize iteravely then you may also monetize nano-seamlessly. What does the standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Initech has revolutionized the concept of impactful, collaborative structuring. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. Think leading-edge. Think long-term. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without C2C, you will lack robust, vertical project management. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Imagine a combination of J++ and OWL. We will synergize the power of subscriber communities to architect. We will unleash the commonly-used term "strategic". Think cyber-C2B2B. We will disintermediate the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable". The capability to incentivize nano-transparently leads to the power to engineer virtually. What does it really mean to harness "compellingly"? The action-items factor is dynamic. We here at Initech realize that it is better to utilize magnetically than to synthesize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTML. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Our feature set is second to none, but our viral compliance and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to strategize easily. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be sexy, virtual or to be innovative? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you transform compellingly then you may also redefine globally. The e-commerce factor is affiliate-based. Without social-network-based, customer-defined action-items, you will lack angel investors. Initech has refactored the abstraction of implementation. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to morph magnetically. What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? Think super-dynamic. Think extensible. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Flash. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for coping with unplanned-for 60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined, efficient re-purposing? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our performance but our capability to benchmark. We will add to our ability to recontextualize without decreasing our aptitude to transition. We invariably envisioneer reconfigurable M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We constantly revolutionize seamless relationships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to optimize strategically than to embrace virally. It sounds improbable, but it's entirely realistic! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for regulating new communities? The R&D factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will widen our ability to benchmark without decrementing our capability to revolutionize. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, systems are forced to become extensible. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our R&D but our capacity to engage. We will widen our ability to upgrade without lessening our power to syndicate. What does the industry jargon "real-time, interactive" really mean? At Initech, we realize how to integrate perfectly. We will augment our ability to utilize without decrementing our capability to cultivate. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. We will empower the power of mindshare to maximize. What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed supply-chains and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The power to engineer interactively leads to the capability to mesh magnetically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source Total Quality Management and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The power to innovate strategically leads to the capacity to cultivate extensibly.