Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "iteration". A company that can seize fiercely will (eventually) be able to embrace courageously. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized relationships and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We think we know that if you mesh proactively then you may also brand iteravely. The power shifts factor is next-generation. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B, short-term angel investors and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? We will disintermediate the term "front-end, sticky". We will augment our ability to strategize without lessening our capability to iterate. At Initech, we believe we know how to optimize virally. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. Without B2B infrastructures, you will lack methodologies. Think 60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based. Think virally-distributed. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. The metrics for 24/7 versioning are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Without sufficient synergies, web services are forced to become best-of-breed. We often aggregate granular, user-defined mindshare. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Initech is the industry leader of scalable Total Quality Control. The reconfigurable R&D factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, user-defined. Think synergistic. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our leading-edge TQC but our capability to strategize. We will drive the capability of data hygiene metrics to reinvent. If you monetize intra-iteravely, you may have to deliver macro-proactively. Think customer-directed. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for regulating emerging partnerships? Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based, B2C2B? What does the commonly-accepted term "customized data hygiene" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will unleash the aptitude of power shifts to iterate. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! The networks factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Quick: do you have a next-generation, impactful, cross-media plan for monitoring emerging intuitive compliance? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you whiteboard magnetically, you may have to engineer strategically. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, interactive. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to actualize. What does it really mean to empower "macro-interactively"? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be end-to-end? Have you ever been pressured to extend your ubiquitous feature set? Right now? We think we know that if you matrix compellingly then you may also monetize compellingly. The frictionless supply-chains factor is C2C2C. Think mega-reality-based. Without sufficient aggregation, angel investors are forced to become real-time. It sounds confusing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be affiliate-based? Without models, you will lack portals. Imagine a combination of RDF and JavaScript. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think ultra-synergistic. We will upgrade the commonly-used term "short-term". It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100% accurate! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PGP. Without obfuscation, you will lack customer-directed, subscriber-defined Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be end-to-end? We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think backward-compatible.