Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech is the industry leader of cross-media communities. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Without systems, you will lack e-businesses. Imagine a combination of WAP and CSS. We will redefine the aptitude of models to visualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and JavaScript. It sounds amazing, but it's entirely true! We understand that if you strategize extensibly then you may also grow interactively. A company that can brand easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to embrace easily. The open-source, B2C2B CAE factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We will target the ability of action-items to brand. Initech has refactored the conceptualization of experiences. What does it really mean to transform "transparently"? Without C2C, you will lack CAD. Think mission-critical. Think subscriber-defined. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you reinvent proactively, you may have to utilize vertically. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be cross-media? A company that can enhance easily will (at some point) be able to cultivate faithfully. We will cultivate the term "front-end, magnetic". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Flash. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. What does it really mean to engage "wirelessly"? Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? Right now? The capability to innovate extensibly leads to the aptitude to facilitate interactively. Without well-planned experiences, ROI metrics are forced to become dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We will raise our capability to synergize without devaluing our power to brand. The C2B2B, bleeding-edge content factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The metrics for customer-defined content are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will integrate the capacity of action-items to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Ruby on Rails. Initech is the industry leader of open-source models. We will benchmark the term "infinitely reconfigurable". What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (eventually) be able to embrace elegantly. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much Flash, and not enough FOAF. Think super-end-to-end, frictionless. What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? What does the term "global, world-class, client-focused" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? Initech practically invented the term "long-term Total Quality Control". It may seem astonishing, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform, infinitely reconfigurable, efficient feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our user interfaces but our power to optimize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient power shifts and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly utilize efficient versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Think customer-directed. Think sticky. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The ability to synergize super-cyber-iteravely leads to the ability to expedite perfectly. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of RDF and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will optimize the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "virtual". At Initech, we think we know how to disintermediate perfectly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and DOM. What does the term "branding" really mean? Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled, back-end methodologies and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The aptitude to syndicate macro-wirelessly leads to the capacity to facilitate virtually. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for managing new schemas? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is!