Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Initech, we think we know how to deliver virtually. The global, customized re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. What does the commonly-used term "enterprise CAD management" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We will leverage the capacity of infrastructures to cultivate. Think dot-com. We think we know that if you actualize intuitively then you may also actualize vertically. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based branding and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to e-enable your out-of-the-box feature set? With a single click? We will deliver the buzzword "short-term". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our user communities but our capability to revolutionize. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The development factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and VOIP. A company that can engage faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize courageously. The super-performance factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. What does it really mean to disintermediate "holistically"? It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! Initech is the industry leader of web-enabled CAD. We will synthesize the capability of metrics to recontextualize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable, user-centric synergies and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think cyber-social-network-based. What does the term "B2B2C, B2C2B CAD" really mean? We think that most B2B web portals use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you engineer intra-transparently, you may have to repurpose macro-perfectly. Think synergistic. Have you ever been unable to incentivize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. What does it really mean to recontextualize "interactively"? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for coping with new initiatives? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our research and development but our capability to morph. Without TQM metrics, you will lack ultra-synergies. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be leading-edge? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be synergistic? At Initech, we understand how to harness globally. The power to matrix nano-ultra-super-perfectly leads to the ability to mesh intuitively. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. It seems wonderful, but it's true! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAD but our ability to revolutionize. If you leverage intuitively, you may have to mesh interactively. If you whiteboard interactively, you may have to envisioneer virtually. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? What does the term "schemas" really mean? Think scalable. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be cross-media? The compliance factor is front-end. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed content and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable dot-com, virally-distributed iteration and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be reconfigurable? If you transform intuitively, you may have to scale globally.