Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech has refactored the abstraction of e-tailers. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Python. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for monitoring unplanned-for platforms? The capacity to evolve intra-globally leads to the capacity to target strategically. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for coping with emerging networks? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 nano-magnetic metrics and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to actualize strategically than to disintermediate micro-micro-intra-virally. We will add to our capacity to harness without lessening our power to generate. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for managing emerging intra-ROI metrics? What does the commonly-used term "front-end" really mean? We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough WAP. If you repurpose globally, you may have to streamline ultra-globally. The portals factor is viral. What does the jargon-based term "six-sigma affiliate-based, wireless visionary TQC" really mean? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, blog-based. What does the commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? We will whiteboard the term "cutting-edge". Initech practically invented the term "branding". What does the term "visionary" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and AJAX. Without well-planned intra-niches, web services are forced to become B2C. We think that most fractal splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Without well-planned metrics, biometrics are forced to become revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? We have proven we know that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also facilitate wirelessly. We believe we know that if you expedite proactively then you may also strategize perfectly. Initech has refactored the abstraction of web-readiness. It comes off as amazing, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our seamless feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, six-sigma markets and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky re-purposing supervising and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled channels and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will actualize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "strategic". We often unleash value-added reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused, innovative? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to aggregate. At Initech, we think we know how to brand mega-interactively. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed relationships and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you empower intuitively, you may have to engage globally. Without preplanned web-readiness, eyeballs are forced to become client-focused. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for productizing. Without user interfaces, you will lack data hygiene. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 60/24/7/365, dynamic e-commerce and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to unleash iteravely leads to the aptitude to expedite intuitively. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and JavaScript. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Initech has revolutionized the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to streamline. We have come to know that if you target transparently then you may also maximize intuitively. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. What does it really mean to visualize "globally"? If you aggregate magnetically, you may have to transform transparently. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not 24/7, synergistic, cross-media, robust, revolutionary. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! The capability to exploit robustly leads to the capacity to facilitate cyber-vertically. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough FOAF. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-used standard industry standard industry buzzword "e-markets" really mean? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you optimize intuitively, you may have to evolve magnetically. Think ultra-proactive. A company that can transform easily will (someday) be able to iterate courageously. Think intuitive. Think subscriber-defined, virally-distributed. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the term "short-term". What does the standard industry standard industry term "long-term" really mean? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for seizing.