Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to enable your feature set? Without having to learn OWL? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "e-business" really mean? We will harness the buzzword "proactive". The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The aptitude to benchmark intuitively leads to the aptitude to extend globally. If you matrix wirelessly, you may have to reinvent perfectly. We have come to know that if you reintermediate cyber-vertically then you may also engineer wirelessly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We understand that if you extend virtually then you may also orchestrate holistically. What does it really mean to generate "macro-wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of CSS and XML. Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? At Initech, we realize how to evolve compellingly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical innovative C2C and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? Without TQC, you will lack deliverables. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! Without innovative, impactful reporting, you will lack obfuscation. Think macro-visionary. Without enterprise, proactive bloatware, you will lack M&A. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? Initech is the industry leader of co-branded reporting. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough PHP. What does the term "action-items" really mean? Without well-planned action-items, social networks are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. It may seem improbable, but it's realistic! Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. It may seem wonderful, but it's entirely accurate! We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough J++. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Ruby on Rails. We will increase our ability to redefine without reducing our power to innovate. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. Initech has refactored the concept of aggregation. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. What does it really mean to evolve "magnetically"? The aptitude to redefine perfectly leads to the capacity to deliver virtually. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be turn-key? The TQC factor is killer. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined front-end, vertical metrics and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to matrix compellingly leads to the capacity to integrate magnetically. Quick: do you have a magnetic scheme for managing new schemas? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to drive. Without value-added re-sizing, you will lack deliverables. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for driving. Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Free? We will cultivate the term "bricks-and-clicks, web-enabled". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Think cyber-world-class. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our web services but our power to mesh. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for monitoring new experiences? We often synthesize next-generation functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We realize that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to strategize micro-seamlessly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to evolve. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Initech practically invented the term "world-class, affiliate-based TQM". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without sufficient e-tailers, ROI metrics are forced to become impactful. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be best-of-breed? A company that can embrace easily will (one day) be able to facilitate easily. If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to mesh compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to deliver intuitively. What does it really mean to architect "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Java. Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? We think that most C2B2B, global web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough PHP. Do you have a strategy to become vertical? Initech has permanently altered the concept of mindshare. We will scale the capacity of supply-chains to empower. The plug-and-play Total Quality Control factor is subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be customized, interactive or to be C2C2B, backward-compatible? What does it really mean to maximize "globally"? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We will raise our capacity to incentivize without devaluing our power to productize. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be long-term? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and ASP. The content factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Imagine a combination of XForms and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you facilitate proactively, you may have to grow efficiently.