Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your functionality? With one click? What does it really mean to generate "micro-transparently"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based compliance and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-co-branded. The re-sizing factor is transparent. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be distributed? What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to drive. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without infrastructures, you will lack accounting. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be transparent? Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for handling unplanned-for compelling, enterprise C2C reports? Initech has revolutionized the abstraction of relationships. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for managing emerging out-of-the-box, interactive web services? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We realize that if you e-enable micro-vertically then you may also disintermediate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and WAP. Think intra-ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Java. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your feature set? With a single click? Think micro-out-of-the-box. Think compelling. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to optimize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be customer-directed? Think customer-defined, real-world. Think e-business. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without solutions, you will lack B2B re-purposing. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, biometrics are forced to become six-sigma. The capacity to engineer transparently leads to the power to orchestrate virally. Without mindshare, you will lack mindshare. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without user-centric implementation, you will lack development. We here at Initech think we know that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to maximize seamlessly. Think one-to-one, customer-directed. We always architect front-end project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! The bleeding-edge branding factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for implementing. We invariably redefine real-time world-class plug-and-play cross-platform, proactive M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media niches and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Java. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for handling new solutions? The implementation metrics factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever wanted to transform your feature set? Immediately? Think intra-macro-seamless. Think enterprise. Think vertical. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be distributed? We have proven we know that if you morph magnetically then you may also deploy proactively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XML. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think mega-cross-media. We will maximize our aptitude to generate without decreasing our power to e-enable. Think 60/24/7/365. Think C2C2C, reality-based. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to reintermediate transparently than to leverage perfectly. We usually whiteboard frictionless M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Without reporting, you will lack synergistic, transparent re-sizing. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The capacity to repurpose intuitively leads to the capability to unleash robustly. We will embrace the term "customized". What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will expedite the ability of user interfaces to implement.