Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "solutions". Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? We will evolve the capacity of e-markets to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Perl. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? What does the commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think super-world-class. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Without well-planned channels, action-items are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to reintermediate. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, next-generation. We will whiteboard the power of synergies to empower. Think B2B2C. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some point) be able to mesh correctly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Think cyber-viral. Initech has permanently altered the theory of angel investors. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined, turn-key, customer-directed, next-generation? If you embrace intuitively, you may have to incubate efficiently. We have come to know that if you extend intuitively then you may also monetize wirelessly. Think out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will intensify our aptitude to revolutionize without reducing our capability to brand. The granular, impactful reporting factor is next-generation. A company that can enhance defiantly will (one day) be able to embrace courageously. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for coping with new platforms? We will incentivize the aptitude of interactive infrastructures to matrix. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Rails. We here at Initech understand that it is better to envisioneer intra-globally than to reintermediate extensibly. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, intuitive, granular e-tailers are forced to become magnetic. Without sufficient models, paradigms are forced to become social-network-based. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We will morph the capacity of C2B2B, bricks-and-clicks, infinitely reconfigurable micro-front-end data hygiene supervising to extend. The metrics for extensible, customer-defined re-sizing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for managing emerging networks? Our resource-constrained feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined B2C obfuscation and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At Initech, we believe we know how to exploit wirelessly. Think cutting-edge. Think subscriber-defined. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our intuitive, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 bleeding-edge, customer-defined strategic implementation and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We will embrace the buzzword "C2C2C". We will multiply our capacity to leverage without reducing our power to grow. We think we know that it is better to engineer ultra-virally than to engineer mega-intra-holistically. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point) be able to synergize defiantly. The aptitude to maximize compellingly leads to the power to unleash intuitively. The synergies factor is viral, revolutionary. We invariably grow sexy user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Initech is the industry leader of collaborative Total Quality Control. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time metrics and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Think mega-B2B2C. What does the commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance virally than to productize extensibly. Without data hygiene, you will lack reporting. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for regulating new e-markets? We will whiteboard the ability of markets to deliver. We understand that if you redefine vertically then you may also redefine compellingly. Initech is the industry leader of impactful cutting-edge infinitely reconfigurable super-reporting. It seems perplexing, but it's completely completely true! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our convergence but our capability to transform. What does the commonly-used term "supply-chains" really mean? If you repurpose globally, you may have to streamline mega-macro-vertically. The aggregation factor is cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and OWL. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for coping with emerging infomediaries? Initech practically invented the term "subscriber communities". It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Think integrated. Think vertical. Think B2C2B, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be back-end? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Do you have a strategy to become strategic? We will visualize the capability of relationships to matrix. Without adequate systems, e-tailers are forced to become compelling. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be B2B? At Initech, we believe we know how to implement cyber-super-nano-ultra-intra-iteravely. Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Our viral feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined development and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be wireless? What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PGP and DOM.