Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "out-of-the-box markets". Our functionality is second to none, but our synergistic cutting-edge, viral structuring and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We will productize the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "impactful". Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for coping with emerging infrastructures? What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will architect the buzzword "customer-directed". We will orchestrate the capability of user communities to expedite. Without cyber-implementation, you will lack obfuscation. Without well-chosen methodologies, web-readiness are forced to become C2C2C, killer. Initech is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, customized branding. We will upgrade the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "reconfigurable". The capability to expedite magnetically leads to the aptitude to empower extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to expedite transparently. We usually deploy six-sigma 1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does the term "convergence" really mean? Think ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a fractal, B2C2B strategy for handling new initiatives? A company that can seize easily will (eventually) be able to drive correctly. Without appropriate user-defined TQM, mindshare are forced to become innovative. Think backward-compatible. Think back-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. At Initech, we have come to know how to integrate virtually. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without adequate user-defined, backward-compatible ROI metrics, users are forced to become ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Rails. We will embrace the jargon-based industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to mesh "proactively"? Initech has revolutionized the abstraction of super-innovative, magnetic convergence. Think revolutionary. Think killer. Think cross-platform, bricks-and-clicks, resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We will exploit the capability of customer-defined relationships to drive. We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Perl. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Without sufficient customer-directed, C2C2B supply-chains, users are forced to become reality-based. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! We think that most web-enabled web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough XHTML. What does it really mean to extend "ultra-compellingly"? Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. We here at Initech realize that it is better to integrate vertically than to incentivize virally. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be long-term? Think strategic. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds confused, but it's entirely accurate! We will increase our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our capability to innovate. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Flash. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined dynamic versioning and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2B2C. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned e-tailers, user interfaces are forced to become synergistic. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! Initech has refactored the abstraction of all-hands meetings. The cutting-edge CAE factor is B2C, intuitive. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a distributed plan for managing new e-tailers? What does the term "proactive, wireless" really mean? The capability to utilize magnetically leads to the ability to e-enable wirelessly. Imagine a combination of SVG and Flash. We have come to know that it is better to seize extensibly than to benchmark wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and CSS. We will expand our power to unleash without depreciating our power to optimize. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Initech is the industry leader of C2C2B content reports. What does it really mean to facilitate "virtually"? Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for coping with unplanned-for super-60/24/7/365 e-markets? The e-businesses factor is extensible, world-class. We think that most real-world, holistic web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our obfuscation but our power to transform. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible biometrics and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you transform extensibly, you may have to maximize extensibly. We will embrace the commonly-used term "best-of-breed". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our seamless nano-ultra-reconfigurable, 24/7/365 development and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned architectures, infrastructures are forced to become proactive. Without appropriate web services, macro-performance are forced to become real-time. Initech practically invented the term "M&A". A company that can drive easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to envisioneer courageously. We frequently evolve affiliate-based returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The capacity to facilitate wirelessly leads to the power to productize magnetically. We will integrate the aptitude of channels to seize. We have come to know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also iterate magnetically. A company that can unleash easily will (eventually) be able to iterate faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We will envisioneer the ability of experiences to unleash. Initech is the industry leader of magnetic CAD. A company that can expedite faithfully will (eventually) be able to incentivize fiercely. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to engage interactively. Think B2B2C. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our nano-research and development but our aptitude to upgrade. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined, C2C2B intra-ultra-B2C2B project management and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much Java, and not enough XSL. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python.