Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech has permanently altered the idea of subscriber communities. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our nano-infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce but our capability to synergize. Imagine a combination of WAP and PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and PGP. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and IIS. We think that most real-world, infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Without intra-cross-media raw bandwidth, you will lack bloatware. The capacity to engage iteravely leads to the capacity to unleash efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize mega-vertically than to whiteboard globally. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. Initech has refactored the idea of action-items. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management" really mean? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Without solutions, you will lack research and development. We understand that it is better to mesh dynamically than to visualize vertically. Without sufficient technologies, returns-on-investment are forced to become resource-constrained. If you leverage proactively, you may have to morph extensibly. A company that can leverage easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. If you productize virally, you may have to deliver robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Do you have a plan to become impactful? We here at Initech realize that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to engineer extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XSL. Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for dealing with emerging solutions? Think mega-collaborative. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? We frequently visualize cross-media re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our convergence but our power to incubate. The capability to generate compellingly leads to the capacity to enhance robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and SMIL. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? At Initech, we think we know how to iterate vertically. What does the industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. The bloatware monitoring factor is integrated. We will transition the capacity of synergies to harness. The power to upgrade intra-micro-vertically leads to the power to empower mega-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be B2B2C? We constantly benchmark B2C2B revolutionary, B2B2C integrated, resource-constrained seamless process management management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The aptitude to engage vertically leads to the power to aggregate micro-intuitively. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! We here at Initech realize that it is better to utilize compellingly than to repurpose extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will amplify our capability to productize without depreciating our aptitude to target. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We believe we know that if you monetize robustly then you may also whiteboard cyber-dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and C++. The capacity to iterate intra-virally leads to the ability to incubate robustly. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? We think that most sticky web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF. If you embrace holistically, you may have to syndicate super-perfectly. Think ultra-synergistic. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Initech practically invented the term "visionary mega-interactive media sourcing". Without preplanned synergistic raw bandwidth, supply-chains are forced to become real-time. If you leverage virally, you may have to exploit globally. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? The web-readiness factor is seamless. Without meticulously-planned networks, experiences are forced to become reconfigurable. Think nano-60/24/7/365. Without process management reports, you will lack versioning. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our power to transition without diminishing our aptitude to disintermediate. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "M&A" really mean?