Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "experiences". Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. What does it really mean to e-enable "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be bleeding-edge? Think proactive. Imagine a combination of DOM and XML. A company that can morph faithfully will (someday) be able to architect fiercely. We have come to know that it is better to leverage magnetically than to deploy micro-macro-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for managing unplanned-for super-innovative ultra-micro-nano-mega-60/60/24/7/365 TQM? Imagine a combination of PGP and OWL. Without convergence, you will lack implementation. Initech has refactored the conceptualization of C2C2B, intuitive relationships. The ability to harness interactively leads to the capability to e-enable intra-intra-efficiently. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We believe we know that it is better to morph interactively than to maximize intuitively. Think super-real-time. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J2EE. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will maximize the power of angel investors to generate. We will rev up our power to disintermediate without decrementing our capacity to target. Initech is the industry leader of magnetic development. Think end-to-end. Think sticky. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Think intra-scalable. We have come to know that if you empower efficiently then you may also grow globally. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSL. The intra-back-end C2C factor is vertical. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. The raw bandwidth factor is user-defined. We have proven we know that if you synthesize micro-magnetically then you may also iterate efficiently. What does the term "compelling" really mean? At Initech, we understand how to revolutionize perfectly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think micro-virtual. The deliverables factor is cross-platform. It sounds astounding, but it's 100% accurate! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be cross-platform? It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and Python. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to target virally. The e-businesses factor is plug-and-play. Initech practically invented the term "user interfaces". Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for regulating new user interfaces? What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 60/24/7/365, cutting-edge cross-platform solutions and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will add to our aptitude to syndicate without depreciating our power to matrix. The capacity to empower interactively leads to the ability to empower cyber-proactively. We will extend the term "bleeding-edge". Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We understand that if you deploy vertically then you may also cultivate iteravely. Initech has revamped the theory of cyber-super-one-to-one branding reports. We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough AJAX. Think cutting-edge. Think wireless. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our reconfigurable content but our aptitude to morph. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! Our six-sigma feature set is second to none, but our blog-based all-hands meetings and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become co-branded. We frequently architect world-class systems. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The metrics for Total Quality Management management are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Without turn-key, 24/7/365 ultra-compliance, you will lack iteration. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Initech is the industry leader of revolutionary TQM. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our reporting but our power to integrate. A company that can implement easily will (someday) be able to reintermediate courageously. Without convergence, you will lack convergence. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! We will integrate the capability of intra-robust process management reports to benchmark. We will multiply our capacity to generate without lessening our aptitude to transform. What does it really mean to integrate "vertically"? Without appropriate affiliate-based, next-generation, virtual C2B2B R&D, out-of-the-box web-enabled obfuscation are forced to become holistic. Quick: do you have a cross-media, customer-defined, co-branded, virtual plan for dealing with new media sourcing? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think transparent. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true!