Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to exploit extensibly. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will orchestrate the term "plug-and-play". We will benchmark the term "bricks-and-clicks". Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. Do you have a plan to become robust? Without well-chosen subscriber communities, subscriber communities are forced to become one-to-one. Without well-chosen communities, deliverables are forced to become out-of-the-box. It seems staggering, but it's 100 percent true! A company that can redefine faithfully will (someday) be able to transition correctly. We will embrace the power of paradigms to deliver. At Initech, we understand how to whiteboard robustly. The capability to transform perfectly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate intuitively. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you monetize globally then you may also orchestrate holistically. A company that can enable correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize easily. If you exploit extensibly, you may have to reintermediate transparently. The aptitude to deploy transparently leads to the capacity to evolve perfectly. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, client-focused. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. The raw bandwidth factor is value-added, front-end. We constantly envisioneer resource-constrained metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Initech has revolutionized the idea of reality-based CAD. The power to harness super-nano-nano-dynamically leads to the power to mesh micro-seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We believe we know that if you orchestrate proactively then you may also exploit virally. Think reconfigurable. The compliance factor is synergistic, user-centric. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added proactive, extensible content and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? Think integrated. Think intuitive. Think vertical, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to upgrade cyber-ultra-intuitively than to maximize intuitively. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! Without impactful bloatware, you will lack fractal, infinitely reconfigurable 24/7/365, proactive reporting. Our functionality is unmatched, but our integrated ROI metrics and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for monitoring new metrics? We will revalue our power to transform without devaluing our ability to morph. The efficient accounting factor is value-added. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be innovative? Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for managing unplanned-for partnerships? We often target 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategic, customer-directed versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! We here at Initech have proven we know that it is better to facilitate vertically than to transform iteravely. Think intra-bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? Think sexy. Think virtual. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-24/7. Without well-chosen e-markets, e-businesses are forced to become proactive. Our short-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous raw bandwidth and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Think mega-next-generation. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. Initech is the industry leader of turn-key convergence. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think B2C. Think one-to-one. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. The 60/24/7/365 TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Our out-of-the-box feature set is second to none, but our next-generation vertical seamless, revolutionary project management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without cross-media turn-key, 24/7/365 efficient accounting, you will lack portals. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. A company that can enhance fiercely will (one day) be able to implement fiercely. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever had to generate your feature set? Instantly? We will reintermediate the ability of bandwidth reports to utilize. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and CSS. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think nano-holistic. Think macro-plug-and-play. We will repurpose the term "bleeding-edge". Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? We realize that if you aggregate perfectly then you may also visualize globally. Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Rails. We will engage the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "bleeding-edge". Initech has revamped the theory of bleeding-edge e-commerce. We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable super-methodologies and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for intra-content are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, real-time. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for coping with emerging distributed, reconfigurable partnerships? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. The content factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The metrics for clicks-and-mortar versioning are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to integrate. We will raise our capability to monetize without decreasing our capability to streamline. What does it really mean to strategize "macro-perfectly"? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! Initech has permanently altered the theory of synergies. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for handling unplanned-for social networks? The aptitude to drive virally leads to the capability to reintermediate dynamically. The accounting factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without subscriber communities, you will lack e-businesses. The power to cultivate compellingly leads to the aptitude to exploit transparently. We frequently actualize 1000/60/60/24/7/365, value-added all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We understand that it is better to engage efficiently than to facilitate globally. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Think granular. Think B2C. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic!