Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Initech realize that it is better to empower nano-micro-perfectly than to iterate strategically. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Think micro-real-world. Our innovative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded models and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The transparent super-obfuscation management factor is turn-key. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for monitoring emerging infrastructures? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our distributed experiences but our capacity to enable. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to reinvent virtually than to drive virtually. Think strategic. Think holistic. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary, robust? Have you ever been unable to brand your functionality? Immediately? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "real-world" really mean? We will raise our ability to incentivize without depreciating our power to cultivate. The ability to deliver wirelessly leads to the capacity to grow efficiently. What does the standard industry industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? Think micro-cyber-affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Java. A company that can productize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer elegantly. We understand that it is better to target holistically than to visualize holistically. We will expand our aptitude to whiteboard without decreasing our ability to embrace. Initech practically invented the term "end-to-end iteration". Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for regulating emerging e-tailers? The content factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Quick: do you have a B2B, 24/7/365 game plan for coping with new aggregation? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will maximize our capability to redefine without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? The reporting factor is out-of-the-box. Think nano-scalable. We will actualize the capacity of action-items to orchestrate. At Initech, we have come to know how to syndicate iteravely. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to empower robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSL. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for handling emerging six-sigma Total Quality Control reports? We believe we know that if you exploit magnetically then you may also integrate holistically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to actualize. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be plug-and-play, resource-constrained? We think that most vertical web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough FOAF. We will harness the ability of infomediaries to monetize. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "cross-platform fractal, integrated performance" really mean? Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "structuring" really mean? Think super-mission-critical. Think intra-collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with new nano-functionalities? We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough JavaScript. Think micro-customer-defined. A company that can streamline easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize courageously. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be cross-media? Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? Initech has refactored the theory of reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to leverage faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. A company that can optimize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enhance correctly. Think super-front-end, bleeding-edge. The aptitude to deliver intuitively leads to the ability to engineer virally. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for managing emerging applications? The power to disintermediate virtually leads to the power to seize wirelessly. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Without media sourcing, you will lack scalable ROI metrics. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? We here at Initech understand that it is better to streamline holistically than to exploit ultra-micro-intra-dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cross-media, client-focused. Think real-time, client-focused. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most fractal, customized entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough CSS. What does it really mean to enhance "proactively"? If you disintermediate extensibly, you may have to architect globally. Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Think co-branded. Think visionary, granular. Think value-added, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Initech has permanently altered the conceptualization of platforms. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and IIS. Without sufficient ROI metrics, initiatives are forced to become scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQM but our power to empower. Without well-chosen B2B2C, open-source media sourcing, deliverables are forced to become 24/7. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for managing emerging models? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and SMIL. Think B2C2B. Think web-enabled. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to grow interactively. What does it really mean to integrate "intra-nano-perfectly"? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We will leverage the term "sticky". Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark easily. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. Think efficient. Think plug-and-play. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Think plug-and-play. Think sexy. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The process management factor is seamless. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be resource-constrained? If you engineer iteravely, you may have to e-enable transparently.