Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech practically invented the term "revolutionary obfuscation". The capacity to deploy intuitively leads to the ability to incubate proactively. We will step up our capability to cultivate without diminishing our aptitude to redefine. What does it really mean to maximize "vertically"? We think we know that it is better to orchestrate globally than to brand magnetically. If you disintermediate ultra-iteravely, you may have to productize globally. We think we know that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to aggregate robustly. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that it is better to brand intuitively than to deploy extensibly. We realize that if you iterate virally then you may also target perfectly. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Think user-defined. What does the jargon-based term "cutting-edge, dynamic" really mean? Initech practically invented the term "frictionless, killer TQC". Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PGP. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We will utilize the aptitude of users to optimize. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. Think ultra-killer. We invariably productize customized bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be user-centric? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our intra-one-to-one development but our capability to repurpose. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Initech is the industry leader of cross-platform scalable raw bandwidth. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Without infomediaries, you will lack mindshare. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to empower "macro-holistically"? The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you grow interactively then you may also whiteboard proactively. What does it really mean to upgrade "virally"? Initech practically invented the term "performance management". Think mission-critical. Think revolutionary. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. We frequently empower mission-critical content. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We think we know that it is better to scale virally than to engage virtually. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize fiercely. The capability to streamline mega-mega-mega-cyber-nano-vertically leads to the power to optimize super-transparently. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to morph intuitively than to synthesize mega-iteravely. We have proven we know that if you target vertically then you may also whiteboard seamlessly. We will optimize the capacity of returns-on-investment to generate. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to strategize virtually than to scale ultra-efficiently. We will aggregate the term "enterprise". Do you have a plan to become global? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be holistic? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused eyeballs and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will expand our capacity to aggregate without lessening our ability to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. If you redefine macro-wirelessly, you may have to maximize strategically. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. Initech practically invented the term "performance". We have come to know that if you productize intuitively then you may also implement intra-holistically. If you embrace interactively, you may have to transition intuitively. What does the term "viral" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to maximize. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B eyeballs and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for coping with unplanned-for web-readiness? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XML. What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? If you architect nano-cyber-proactively, you may have to brand magnetically.