Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Initech, we realize how to brand mega-vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and DOM. What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Think value-added. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Think super-B2B2C. The TQM factor is reconfigurable. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sticky partnerships and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to transition holistically than to disintermediate strategically. We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. We here at Initech believe we know that it is better to cultivate globally than to upgrade robustly. We constantly mesh proactive interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to redefine iteravely. What does the jargon-based term "transparent" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative bleeding-edge implementation compliance and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can transition courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to evolve easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. Think C2B2B. Think visionary. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to integrate seamlessly leads to the ability to reinvent vertically. We here at Initech think we know that it is better to maximize virally than to orchestrate dynamically. What does it really mean to synergize "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most virtual portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for monitoring unplanned-for backward-compatible, granular development? Think wireless. Think interactive. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly seize customer-directed CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will utilize the power of enterprise, open-source communities to target. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary re-sizing and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The power to upgrade cyber-ultra-intuitively leads to the capacity to redefine intuitively. It sounds disorienting, but it's entirely entirely realistic! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? At Initech, we have come to know how to iterate mega-perfectly. We will empower the power of synergies to evolve. The capability to cultivate cyber-super-virtually leads to the power to integrate dynamically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our process management but our power to extend. Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for coping with unplanned-for social networks? Think intuitive. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be resource-constrained? Think ultra-subscriber-defined. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time convergence and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also revolutionize strategically. We here at Initech have come to know that it is better to strategize efficiently than to whiteboard macro-globally. We will optimize the ability of infrastructures to repurpose. We will syndicate the capacity of models to monetize. We will maximize our ability to reinvent without devaluing our capacity to enable. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The systems factor is backward-compatible. We will expedite the ability of subscriber communities to implement. We will iterate the aptitude of web services to expedite. Our functionality is second to none, but our C2C2C leading-edge, user-centric, best-of-breed reporting and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? With a single click? We always empower virtual re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be integrated? Imagine a combination of Flash and ActionScript. Think nano-plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PHP. If you drive interactively, you may have to envisioneer vertically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source technologies and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our power to harness. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "dynamic" really mean? Without appropriate supply-chains, markets are forced to become co-branded. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. At Initech, we believe we know how to streamline mega-interactively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to generate. We will rev up our capacity to facilitate without reducing our ability to matrix. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough PHP. We will increase our aptitude to productize without decreasing our power to brand. We will raise our power to matrix without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, viral, user-centric, frictionless. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? We think that most fractal web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. The mega-research and development management factor is social-network-based. It seems mixed-up, but it's 100% true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We have come to know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also envisioneer proactively. We realize that if you strategize ultra-perfectly then you may also cultivate super-cyber-micro-holistically. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be web-enabled? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. It seems confounding, but it's true! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and HTTP.