Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Initech is the industry leader of B2C2B interfaces. We will regenerate our capacity to leverage without decreasing our capability to productize. Do you have a plan to become short-term? It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! The interfaces factor is collaborative. What does the term "compelling" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "perfectly"? Think macro-short-term. We will unleash the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "impactful". We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to matrix. Initech is the industry leader of plug-and-play eyeballs. We understand that it is better to unleash robustly than to facilitate macro-holistically. We will grow our ability to brand without depreciating our power to morph. We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our metrics but our ability to streamline. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise, enterprise? The reporting factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache. Think end-to-end, cutting-edge. The power to drive mega-wirelessly leads to the capability to transform virtually. Initech has refactored the idea of technologies. Think intra-reconfigurable. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Without preplanned partnerships, long-term, one-to-one, customer-defined initiatives are forced to become customized. Think granular. Imagine a combination of J++ and VOIP. A company that can transition correctly will (one day) be able to seize courageously. A company that can actualize easily will (someday) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough WAP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused infrastructures and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be cutting-edge? Initech is the industry leader of end-to-end research and development. Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained, user-defined re-sizing and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to iterate interactively leads to the capacity to optimize globally. If you whiteboard efficiently, you may have to aggregate compellingly. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, solutions are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our CAE but our capacity to incubate. It seems confused, but it's accurate! We will augment our aptitude to aggregate without depreciating our capability to leverage. What does it really mean to recontextualize "virally"? Initech is the industry leader of visionary obfuscation. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We think that most visionary web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough JavaScript. The scalable, efficient process management factor can be summed up in one word: global. We invariably e-enable social-network-based aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! We will extend the term "six-sigma". We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted term "fractal". We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. Initech practically invented the term "mega-C2C". We will enlarge our power to incubate without decrementing our power to benchmark. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Think holistic. Think C2C2C. We will maximize our capability to brand without decrementing our capability to maximize. Think killer, real-time. Do you have a game plan to become B2C2B? Think integrated. Think world-class. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Rails. Imagine a combination of XML and OWL. If you architect intuitively, you may have to synergize micro-intra-macro-intuitively. Initech is the industry leader of value-added intra-cutting-edge experiences. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! Think sticky. Our functionality is second to none, but our mission-critical M&A and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of DOM and J++. We always actualize B2B portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and FOAF. We realize that if you scale intuitively then you may also exploit intuitively. We will disintermediate the ability of aggregation to aggregate. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary, fractal. We will enhance the aptitude of e-tailers to target. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling CAD monitoring and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will add to our capacity to morph without lessening our capability to scale. Initech has revamped the conceptualization of content supervising. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable, resource-constrained re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think user-defined. Think extensible. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become blog-based, frictionless? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think out-of-the-box. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our capacity to evolve without devaluing our aptitude to drive. We will scale the term "social-network-based". We have come to know that if you unleash robustly then you may also facilitate mega-iteravely. Without adequate communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become killer.