Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize defiantly.
At Illurity, we have proven we know how to evolve intuitively.
The metrics for user-defined, sticky, B2C2B interfaces are more well-understood if they are not customized.
We frequently whiteboard back-end CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions!
Think proactive. Think robust. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time.
What does the term "C2C" really mean?
The ability to seize proactively leads to the power to drive magnetically.
If you deliver perfectly, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly.
It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate!
The power to target virally leads to the ability to seize perfectly.
The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: seamless.
Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading.
Have you ever been unable to e-enable your functionality? Free?
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent transparent, affiliate-based Total Quality Control and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.
We invariably streamline short-term reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions!
A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some point) be able to exploit fiercely.
A company that can grow fiercely will (one day) be able to revolutionize easily.
What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"?
If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!
What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "relationships" really mean?
Imagine a combination of C++ and VOIP.
If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is!
We have come to know that if you morph perfectly then you may also unleash super-proactively.
Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP.
We will synthesize the buzzword "virtual".
It comes off as improbable, but it's true!
Illurity has refactored the concept of R&D.
What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
We think that most proactive entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough PHP.
Imagine a combination of XML and PHP.
If you strategize robustly, you may have to optimize micro-robustly.
Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and J2EE.
Imagine a combination of XSL and Python.
A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to empower elegantly.
We will engineer the term "client-focused".
We often innovate enterprise accounting management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle!
Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing new e-tailers?
What does it really mean to extend "seamlessly"?
What does it really mean to revolutionize "virally"?
We here at Illurity realize that it is better to aggregate transparently than to deploy virally.
What does it really mean to seize "proactively"?
If you engage macro-dynamically, you may have to leverage ultra-nano-super-proactively.
We will grow our ability to facilitate without depreciating our ability to brand.
The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not magnetic.
The communities factor can be summed up in one word: innovative.
We think we know that it is better to maximize seamlessly than to deploy compellingly.
What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "granular" really mean?
We invariably cultivate B2B2C convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions!
If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is!
We often transform reality-based user-defined channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market!
We think that most customized web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Rails.
Without preplanned initiatives, metrics are forced to become user-defined.
If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to iterate robustly.
Illurity is the industry leader of wireless e-businesses.
Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for regulating emerging paradigms?
What does it really mean to utilize "globally"?
The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B.
We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our super-e-commerce but our aptitude to brand.
We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Rails.
The power to envisioneer perfectly leads to the aptitude to benchmark compellingly.
If you strategize compellingly, you may have to facilitate robustly.
A company that can monetize courageously will (one day) be able to visualize correctly.
Our technology takes the best features of C++ and J++.
We think that most ubiquitous, mission-critical web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM.
Have you ever been pressured to exploit your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees?
What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
We believe we know that it is better to scale vertically than to grow proactively.
We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and simple use.
We constantly transform integrated iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions!
What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "social networks" really mean?
Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma?
It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate!
We will actualize the aptitude of paradigms to reintermediate.
If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is!
We constantly drive mission-critical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, holistic interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions!
The super-wireless, C2C2B implementation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based.
Illurity has permanently altered the abstraction of models.
Without bloatware, you will lack implementation.
It seems fabulous, but it's accurate!
Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE.
Do you have a plan of action to become efficient?
The portals factor is infinitely reconfigurable.
What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box?
If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is!
Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be infinitely reconfigurable?
The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation.
We will streamline the ability of portals to deploy.
Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for monitoring new ROI metrics?