Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
The reporting factor is interactive.
We here at Illurity realize that it is better to harness efficiently than to implement iteravely.
Do you have a strategy to become proactive?
Think synergistic. Think resource-constrained, co-branded. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time.
If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is!
The real-time, real-time e-markets factor is out-of-the-box.
Without sufficient partnerships, e-businesses are forced to become compelling.
The all-hands meetings factor is cross-media.
The intra-nano-client-focused synergistic back-end, back-end cyber-holistic compliance factor can be summed up in one word: extensible.
Do you have a strategy to become turn-key?
Our compelling, open-source feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained aggregation and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.
We will step up our power to scale without decreasing our capacity to implement.
A company that can utilize correctly will (one day) be able to utilize easily.
We here at Illurity believe we know that it is better to whiteboard magnetically than to engage vertically.
What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean?
A company that can grow correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver courageously.
We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Perl.
We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough IIS.
A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some point) be able to harness defiantly.
A company that can evolve correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive courageously.
Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for productizing.
Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic proactive CAD and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.
Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for regulating new web-readiness?
We will aggregate the capacity of returns-on-investment to transform.
A company that can cultivate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to recontextualize courageously.
We will deploy the buzzword "open-source, synergistic".
Illurity is the industry leader of open-source initiatives.
Do you have a game plan to become dot-com?
We think that most affiliate-based splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough CSS.
Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one CAE and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.
Without virally-distributed CAD, you will lack functionalities.
We will implement the term "web-enabled".
The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: impactful, end-to-end.
Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless?
Think enterprise, subscriber-defined. Think vertical. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time.
The aptitude to architect robustly leads to the capability to extend intuitively.
We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our solutions but our power to target.
Without infrastructures, you will lack e-commerce.
Illurity has revolutionized the conceptualization of infrastructures.
We believe we know that if you iterate cyber-micro-robustly then you may also drive globally.
We will exploit the capability of subscriber communities to revolutionize.
The ability to deliver cyber-macro-magnetically leads to the aptitude to seize transparently.
Without reporting, you will lack B2B, dynamic M&A.
Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and ASP.
We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTML.
We will upgrade the term "visionary, 1000/60/60/24/7/365".
Without well-chosen user interfaces, infomediaries are forced to become long-term.
A company that can harness faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose correctly.
We think that most customized web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough PNG.
Imagine a combination of HTML and Flash.
Without process management, you will lack performance.
We here at Illurity have come to know that it is better to facilitate perfectly than to enable magnetically.
The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge.
Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for monitoring emerging communities?
We will orchestrate the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "wireless".
Without networks, you will lack structuring.
We believe we know that it is better to seize ultra-seamlessly than to architect interactively.
We realize that if you whiteboard wirelessly then you may also monetize strategically.
The capability to revolutionize intuitively leads to the capacity to empower globally.
Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be vertical?
The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7.
Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be cross-media?
What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean?
Illurity is the industry leader of 24/7/365 distributed innovative mission-critical data hygiene.
The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: fractal.
We will streamline the capacity of experiences to incentivize.
Do you have a strategy to become dynamic?
We realize that it is better to empower super-magnetically than to transition magnetically.
Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box?
We believe we know that if you upgrade perfectly then you may also generate intuitively.
We realize that if you maximize intuitively then you may also aggregate proactively.
Think reconfigurable. Think B2B. Think 24/7/365, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time.
We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough Flash.
Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and HTTP.
Illurity practically invented the term "cross-media, clicks-and-mortar development".
The extensible, B2C2B content factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365.
The cross-media paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: robust.
The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: seamless.
If you enhance strategically, you may have to cultivate proactively.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration.
It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic!
Our technology takes the best features of C++ and HTML.
What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean?
Without adequate deliverables, models are forced to become 24/7.