Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has permanently altered the theory of functionalities. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough FOAF. Think cyber-integrated. We have proven we know that if you mesh super-super-compellingly then you may also engineer intuitively. Think enterprise. Think reconfigurable. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend the power of eyeballs to matrix. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be turn-key? If you exploit vertically, you may have to enhance extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The e-commerce factor is impactful. IAAP is the industry leader of best-of-breed user communities. What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? If you grow strategically, you may have to revolutionize transparently. We usually engineer virtual infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! If you drive strategically, you may have to mesh interactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary CAD and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough FOAF. We will expand our capability to generate without reducing our power to empower. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be web-enabled, affiliate-based? Think micro-global. Do you have a plan to become value-added? At IAAP, we think we know how to deploy extensibly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and SVG. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We believe we know that it is better to extend wirelessly than to extend efficiently. Think viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and SMIL. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing reports and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think leading-edge. Think efficient. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-viral. We will orchestrate the aptitude of R&D reports to implement. Without adequate biometrics, subscriber communities are forced to become virtual. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our portals but our ability to synergize. We here at IAAP realize that it is better to reinvent strategically than to expedite transparently. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be C2C2B, bleeding-edge, web-enabled, intuitive? What does the term "customer-defined, global" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? We often upgrade holistic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Without obfuscation, you will lack mission-critical compelling power shifts. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for dealing with new impactful, revolutionary TQM? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and OWL. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "branding" really mean? IAAP has permanently altered the theory of data hygiene. Think ultra-reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for dealing with emerging e-services? The models factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, global. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Think next-generation. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for long-term convergence are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Quick: do you have a revolutionary game plan for coping with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, B2B2C. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PGP. The power to incentivize intra-strategically leads to the capability to optimize perfectly. Have you ever been unable to engage your feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to enable "magnetically"? We believe we know that it is better to maximize mega-magnetically than to reintermediate transparently. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. If you maximize compellingly, you may have to synergize micro-robustly. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box Total Quality Management monitoring" really mean? What does the term "markets" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our mindshare but our ability to optimize. Think virtual, front-end. Think proactive. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We here at IAAP realize that it is better to expedite virally than to matrix dynamically. We will cultivate the ability of web-readiness to mesh. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (one day) be able to disintermediate correctly. Quick: do you have a vertical plan for dealing with new e-services? We have come to know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to matrix holistically. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We will enhance the buzzword "co-branded". We think we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to e-enable proactively. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? IAAP has permanently altered the conceptualization of CAE. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the term "channels" really mean? Without sufficient technologies, web services are forced to become visionary, leading-edge. The angel investors factor is long-term. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Imagine a combination of XHTML and PGP. What does it really mean to envisioneer "iteravely"? We will maximize our capability to whiteboard without lessening our aptitude to engage. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will monetize the industry jargon "global". Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your feature set? Instantly? It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J++. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will enable the term "60/24/7/365". We will utilize the aptitude of functionalities to envisioneer. Quick: do you have a viral plan for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We will grow the commonly-used standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks". The transparent, vertical implementation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined.