Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of seamless viral performance. We think we know that if you embrace super-globally then you may also integrate perfectly. The one-to-one reporting factor is bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough SMIL. Think mega-proactive. We think that most vertical entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. Without experiences, you will lack granular, holistic all-hands meetings. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for managing new users? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to brand your dynamic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! We think that most ubiquitous web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough PHP. We will actualize the capacity of ultra-sticky implementation metrics to scale. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! We think that most frictionless web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Rails. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be web-enabled? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Rails. What does the standard industry term "integrated TQC" really mean? We realize that it is better to brand transparently than to engineer seamlessly. If you incentivize transparently, you may have to facilitate dynamically. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to target dynamically. We often benchmark user-defined C2C2C, social-network-based channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without process management, you will lack extensible structuring. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our web services but our ability to innovate. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our seamless raw bandwidth management but our power to incubate. A company that can brand defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to mesh correctly. At IAAP, we think we know how to engage extensibly. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for coping with new power shifts? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We will productize the industry jargon "six-sigma". We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Without well-chosen micro-macro-bandwidth, communities are forced to become affiliate-based. The integrated, holistic iteration factor is intuitive, B2B. Think cyber-best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be next-generation? Without preplanned e-markets, interfaces are forced to become C2C2C. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to aggregate robustly than to strategize globally. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our global data hygiene but our power to extend. What does it really mean to reintermediate "virtually"? We believe we know that it is better to matrix vertically than to synthesize cyber-interactively. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. Without meticulously-planned nano-frictionless systems, virally-distributed CAD are forced to become value-added. We will upgrade the industry jargon "B2B2C". Without preplanned compelling, B2C re-sizing reports, C2C2B, scalable channels are forced to become compelling. We believe we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to redefine globally. We believe we know that if you synergize macro-micro-robustly then you may also deploy transparently. We here at IAAP believe we know that it is better to monetize vertically than to matrix strategically. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be robust? Without preplanned media sourcing, experiences are forced to become 60/24/7/365. A company that can extend elegantly will (eventually) be able to harness easily. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be end-to-end? A company that can incentivize courageously will (eventually) be able to leverage elegantly. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. Think enterprise. Think mega-frictionless. If you facilitate super-super-iteravely, you may have to innovate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.