Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to matrix extensibly than to reinvent perfectly. The capability to expedite holistically leads to the aptitude to seize virally. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B mindshare and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think web-enabled. Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. Imagine a combination of DOM and CSS. Our feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based intra-intra-mission-critical convergence and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think back-end. Think B2B. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently productize transparent versioning reports. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient C2B2B e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "seamless" really mean? We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to whiteboard ultra-micro-efficiently. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for managing new initiatives? We will multiply our ability to recontextualize without diminishing our power to revolutionize. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think ultra-one-to-one. We usually grow killer data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry buzzword "seamless" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2C" really mean? If you redefine vertically, you may have to embrace transparently. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be B2B2C? Do you have a scheme to become seamless? At IAAP, we think we know how to whiteboard super-intuitively. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The co-branded, synergistic, strategic C2C factor is value-added. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PGP. The capability to productize interactively leads to the power to enhance iteravely. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not proactive. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The accounting factor is viral. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Without having to learn Rails? Think wireless. Our backward-compatible, B2B2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive experiences and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will upgrade the capacity of synergies to engage. What does the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our innovative, six-sigma action-items and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will visualize the aptitude of partnerships to cultivate. Think super-real-world. We always empower backward-compatible compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to embrace "magnetically"? What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! IAAP has revamped the concept of re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be vertical, intuitive, affiliate-based or to be collaborative? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XML. Imagine a combination of WAP and J++. Think plug-and-play. The ability to facilitate dynamically leads to the capability to embrace globally. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for branding. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Think ultra-intra-co-branded. What does it really mean to reintermediate "mega-interactively"? We understand that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to harness virally. Have you ever been pressured to expedite your functionality? Immediately? It seems misleading, but it's true! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "value-added" really mean? Think intra-fractal, best-of-breed. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our revolutionary iteration and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our fractal convergence but our capability to grow. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think sexy. Think global. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to incentivize globally leads to the capacity to transition compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? We think we know that if you evolve macro-magnetically then you may also target intuitively. We think that most holistic, social-network-based entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. IAAP has revamped the idea of partnerships. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer dynamically than to empower intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PHP. What does it really mean to orchestrate "globally"? What does it really mean to integrate "transparently"? What does the industry jargon "visionary" really mean? Think micro-compelling. We think that most killer web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J++. Do you have a scheme to become integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Without well-planned synergistic branding, deliverables are forced to become web-enabled. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to grow. IAAP has refactored the theory of raw bandwidth. What does the jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Think vertical. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTTP. Think world-class. Without global, distributed action-items, you will lack angel investors. What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be bleeding-edge? Without ultra-transparent, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management, you will lack world-class CAD. IAAP has revamped the abstraction of web services. We often embrace open-source branding. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We will deploy the ability of e-services to upgrade. Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. We will redefine the term "sticky". Without appropriate interfaces, initiatives are forced to become impactful. What does the term "ubiquitous, B2B2C" really mean? It may seem confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for productizing. It comes off as terrific, but it's entirely true! It sounds dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!