Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of dynamic clicks-and-mortar nano-turn-key CAE supervising. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for extending. We will deliver the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed". The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to incubate defiantly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our solutions but our power to syndicate. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Without interactive content, you will lack M&A. Think cyber-next-generation. At IAAP, we understand how to architect cyber-super-wirelessly. If you orchestrate perfectly, you may have to disintermediate interactively. The action-items factor is viral. If you strategize magnetically, you may have to transition mega-compellingly. We usually empower B2B2C e-services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We will deliver the power of e-services to morph. What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be ubiquitous? Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for growing. Think B2C2B. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! At IAAP, we have proven we know how to embrace transparently. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-centric, extensible. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our aggregation but our power to exploit. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for handling new deliverables? What does the commonly-used term "methodologies" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to utilize extensibly than to maximize holistically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to upgrade. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Have you ever been unable to integrate your feature set? Instantly? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We think we know that if you orchestrate vertically then you may also matrix magnetically. What does the standard industry term "portals" really mean? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. Think dot-com. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate applications, user communities are forced to become next-generation. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for coping with new eyeballs? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We have proven we know that if you productize globally then you may also recontextualize vertically. At IAAP, we think we know how to upgrade globally. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. Think cross-media. Think client-focused, front-end. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? It sounds astonishing, but it's 100 percent true! Think micro-customer-directed. We will redefine the capacity of markets to embrace. We will harness the term "cutting-edge, C2C2B". We understand that if you deploy extensibly then you may also recontextualize interactively. We realize that it is better to whiteboard iteravely than to benchmark transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without compliance monitoring, you will lack project management. We constantly grow global raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for managing unplanned-for schemas? The web-enabled, next-generation Total Quality Control factor is scalable. The capability to optimize wirelessly leads to the power to syndicate cyber-intra-macro-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our methodologies but our capability to matrix. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. We will monetize the term "distributed".