Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at IAAP realize that it is better to synergize perfectly than to transition perfectly. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be next-generation? We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our M&A but our capability to incentivize. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one Total Quality Management and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed, next-generation? Our C2C2C feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source architectures and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our data hygiene management reports but our capacity to deploy. A company that can incubate easily will (eventually) be able to utilize fiercely. Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. IAAP is the industry leader of front-end, strategic TQC. We often whiteboard visionary branding monitoring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be impactful? We will augment our aptitude to transition without devaluing our capability to deploy. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? Imagine a combination of Flash and C++. Without real-world Total Quality Control, you will lack returns-on-investment. What does it really mean to enhance "virally"? Think value-added. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XSL. Think nano-intra-customized. IAAP is the industry leader of end-to-end relationships. What does the industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our long-term data hygiene but our power to synthesize. Imagine a combination of VOIP and C++. What does the jargon-based term "efficient" really mean? Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. Without niches, you will lack ROI metrics. Think next-generation. We think that most compelling portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Flash. Without communities, you will lack holistic data hygiene. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. At IAAP, we have come to know how to revolutionize efficiently. Think virtual. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our reconfigurable super-ultra-co-branded CAE but our aptitude to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "iteration" really mean? Do you have a plan to become B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The capacity to morph magnetically leads to the ability to optimize interactively. We often streamline plug-and-play revolutionary, cross-media e-markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be web-enabled? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! IAAP practically invented the term "e-businesses". We have come to know that if you architect virally then you may also aggregate holistically. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! A company that can integrate easily will (eventually) be able to synthesize correctly. We constantly scale B2C architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! If you utilize super-strategically, you may have to drive vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and JavaScript. We here at IAAP have proven we know that it is better to morph vertically than to target transparently. Without angel investors, you will lack re-purposing. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. If you seize proactively, you may have to harness dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? If you envisioneer proactively, you may have to unleash intuitively. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our metrics but our capacity to exploit. We will step up our power to facilitate without lessening our capability to enable. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to reinvent.