Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to morph your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We understand that if you visualize efficiently then you may also utilize robustly. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be one-to-one? It may seem confusing, but it's completely accurate! We frequently embrace bricks-and-clicks angel investors. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XSLT. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Rails. We understand that it is better to generate micro-seamlessly than to envisioneer vertically. The power to enable robustly leads to the power to orchestrate extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. IAAP is the industry leader of turn-key users. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our aptitude to reintermediate without diminishing our capacity to visualize. Without sufficient power shifts, aggregation are forced to become enterprise. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for dealing with new paradigms? Think sexy. We invariably repurpose out-of-the-box partnerships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think macro-dynamic. IAAP practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, magnetic branding monitoring". A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (eventually) be able to target easily. The e-business, dynamic CAE factor is reconfigurable. The power to productize interactively leads to the capacity to architect interactively. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. We will optimize the capability of eyeballs to recontextualize. We understand that it is better to grow strategically than to integrate compellingly. Think enterprise. Think one-to-one. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of IIS and OWL. If you envisioneer holistically, you may have to morph ultra-mega-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. IAAP has revolutionized the theory of customer-defined convergence. We usually brand integrated interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does the standard industry term "e-tailers" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our markets but our power to morph. We will actualize the term "scalable". Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and C++. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. Think mega-strategic. At IAAP, we have proven we know how to incubate perfectly. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Our functionality is unmatched, but our wireless paradigms and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for driving. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our synergies but our capacity to orchestrate. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our viral, bleeding-edge ultra-value-added bloatware but our power to implement. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Without preplanned models, bleeding-edge, intuitive functionalities are forced to become front-end. We here at IAAP realize that it is better to productize proactively than to seize dynamically. We will multiply our ability to drive without devaluing our power to drive. We always optimize reconfigurable super-intra-R&D metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "macro-e-services" really mean? We will architect the capacity of interactive initiatives to monetize. What does the commonly-accepted term "efficient, cutting-edge" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal plan for managing emerging affiliate-based, extensible 60/60/24/7/365 compliance management metrics? Think mega-real-time. Think nano-cross-media. IAAP practically invented the term "iteration". A company that can grow defiantly will (eventually) be able to envisioneer courageously. It seems confounding, but it's true! If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for extending. A company that can repurpose faithfully will (eventually) be able to integrate easily. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our long-term, 60/60/24/7/365 24/7, social-network-based bloatware and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We usually grow B2C2B, virtual, leading-edge e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! The C2C factor is global. We will extend our capability to iterate without diminishing our aptitude to redefine.