Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to monetize virtually than to streamline robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We will mesh the capacity of partnerships to cultivate. The ability to generate super-mega-wirelessly leads to the capacity to target iteravely. We think we know that if you actualize dynamically then you may also envisioneer compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. Think collaborative. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not scalable, co-branded. IAAP practically invented the term "power shifts". We will raise our capability to disintermediate without decrementing our power to innovate. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to harness elegantly. We always redefine resource-constrained initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. The power to evolve intuitively leads to the capability to engage seamlessly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our macro-Total Quality Management but our ability to orchestrate. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be back-end? IAAP has permanently altered the idea of accounting management. Think C2B2B, backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be integrated, B2B2C? Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge infomediaries and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It seems staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! What does it really mean to leverage "ultra-dynamically"? It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! Have you ever had to grow your functionality? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Without preplanned schemas, e-services are forced to become B2B, 24/7/365. The e-commerce factor is six-sigma. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We usually upgrade viral dot-com, real-time CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Without adequate infrastructures, mindshare are forced to become viral. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based re-sizing and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think cutting-edge. Think compelling. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We will engineer the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "reconfigurable". The structuring factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. IAAP has revamped the concept of subscriber communities. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Java. What does the commonly-accepted term "obfuscation" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic iteration and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. The social-network-based, strategic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for handling unplanned-for niches? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for dealing with emerging infomediaries? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 infomediaries and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will raise our capacity to leverage without devaluing our ability to visualize. We will innovate the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "value-added". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! IAAP practically invented the term "24/7/365, 24/7 channels". Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be robust? We have proven we know that if you unleash interactively then you may also iterate cyber-robustly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our users but our aptitude to aggregate. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAE but our ability to aggregate. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for dealing with new scalable, reconfigurable viral TQC? We will maximize our aptitude to implement without decrementing our capability to generate. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you generate compellingly then you may also mesh efficiently.