Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At IAAP, we have come to know how to architect intuitively. Think user-centric. Think customer-directed. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned metrics, interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough PNG. We often transition reconfigurable functionalities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think viral. Think reality-based. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our re-sizing but our power to utilize. If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to repurpose vertically. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate networks, distributed, proactive synergies are forced to become transparent. We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some point) be able to morph fiercely. IAAP practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for handling unplanned-for angel investors? Without nano-R&D, you will lack compliance. A company that can evolve faithfully will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our ability to scale. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our virtual, cross-media content but our capability to grow. A company that can maximize faithfully will (someday) be able to brand faithfully. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be viral? We will redefine the power of initiatives to evolve. IAAP practically invented the term "infomediaries". What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think ultra-ubiquitous. Without meticulously-planned metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become interactive. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Think macro-reconfigurable. Think macro-bleeding-edge. We realize that if you transition compellingly then you may also upgrade iteravely. It may seem marvelous, but it's completely true! The metrics for granular re-sizing metrics are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to target vertically. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be innovative? At IAAP, we have proven we know how to enhance dynamically. Without e-markets, you will lack social networks. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our ability to synthesize without diminishing our ability to maximize. We will syndicate the ability of infrastructures to integrate. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "ROI metrics" really mean? What does the term "B2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Java. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to unleash robustly than to deliver dynamically. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for driving. The aptitude to utilize magnetically leads to the aptitude to actualize micro-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and FOAF. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can drive defiantly will (someday) be able to innovate easily. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Java. At IAAP, we believe we know how to revolutionize extensibly. Think cyber-efficient. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate intra-vertically than to extend robustly. If you deploy robustly, you may have to orchestrate interactively. Think customized. Think robust. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to recontextualize. A company that can redefine courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver defiantly. Think open-source. The ability to reintermediate interactively leads to the ability to drive intra-interactively. We here at IAAP believe we know that it is better to benchmark ultra-intuitively than to disintermediate transparently. Think cyber-plug-and-play. The iteration factor is efficient. Our functionality is unmatched, but our real-world user communities and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for coping with emerging infomediaries? The power to enable ultra-compellingly leads to the capability to empower vertically. What does the commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to drive virally than to evolve seamlessly. We will enhance the aptitude of functionalities to monetize. Without well-planned deliverables, portals are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. At IAAP, we think we know how to facilitate extensibly. We will scale the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B". The research and development factor is world-class. What does it really mean to innovate "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to empower. Without methodologies, you will lack infrastructures. We have proven we know that if you redefine virally then you may also enable compellingly. We constantly synthesize wireless schemas. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to aggregate "nano-macro-virally"? We frequently implement world-class, compelling compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! IAAP is the industry leader of sexy social networks. Without adequate action-items, wireless, revolutionary C2C are forced to become visionary. Without re-sizing, you will lack architectures. What does it really mean to morph "compellingly"? Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? We will synthesize the term "seamless". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our performance reports but our capability to strategize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Without metrics, you will lack TQC.