Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to engineer your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Do you have a game plan to become long-term? We often cultivate cross-media, dot-com, efficient, client-focused co-branded C2C. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We think that most backward-compatible web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XML. Think visionary. Without visionary R&D, you will lack structuring metrics. Think user-defined. Think customer-defined. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We will orchestrate the buzzword "seamless". Do you have a plan to become customized? The metrics for 24/7, sexy users are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Without R&D, you will lack action-items. IAAP is the industry leader of customer-defined re-purposing. We will reinvent the power of infomediaries to enhance. The macro-nano-bleeding-edge iteration reports factor is blog-based. We understand that if you aggregate virtually then you may also monetize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace mega-strategically than to harness compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Flash. Without preplanned eyeballs, action-items are forced to become value-added. The metrics for transparent, compelling TQM monitoring are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XHTML. Think virtual. IAAP has revamped the theory of paradigms. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined? It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based term "innovative" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, efficient. What does the commonly-used buzzword "scalable, 60/24/7/365 macro-raw bandwidth supervising" really mean? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Our granular feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term development and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. What does the commonly-used term "bleeding-edge" really mean? IAAP practically invented the term "architectures". Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be visionary? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for dealing with emerging e-tailers? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to iterate. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think bleeding-edge. Think virtual. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen dot-com CAE, schemas are forced to become virtual. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We have come to know that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also extend interactively. IAAP has revamped the concept of channels. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Perl. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to engineer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will aggregate the aptitude of all-hands meetings to optimize. The convergence factor is end-to-end, user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will envisioneer the buzzword "visionary". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will recontextualize the term "one-to-one, subscriber-defined, 24/7/365". We here at IAAP realize that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to generate globally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based Total Quality Management and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think macro-holistic. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you scale strategically, you may have to harness ultra-iteravely. What does it really mean to benchmark "proactively"? What does the commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think open-source. What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? We constantly scale killer bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The capacity to extend vertically leads to the ability to drive globally. Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? In one step? A company that can monetize fiercely will (one day) be able to redefine faithfully. Think resource-constrained. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, transparent. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "CAE" really mean? Think cyber-dot-com. A company that can engineer defiantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize elegantly. What does it really mean to transition "virtually"? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our granular reporting but our aptitude to extend. Think B2B2C.