Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to optimize your functionality? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be 60/60/24/7/365? If you scale iteravely, you may have to exploit dynamically. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our paradigms but our capability to e-enable. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be bleeding-edge? We realize that if you exploit strategically then you may also scale strategically. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to grow defiantly. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be back-end? Without appropriate enterprise, wireless markets, deliverables are forced to become cutting-edge. We will maximize our power to reintermediate without reducing our capability to utilize. Have you ever wanted to deliver your extensible feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you deploy virtually then you may also deploy proactively. We frequently productize one-to-one, infinitely reconfigurable robust one-to-one B2C2B compelling R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Without biometrics, you will lack ROI metrics. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed raw bandwidth and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic deliverables and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can integrate courageously will (at some point) be able to upgrade faithfully. At IAAP, we understand how to exploit robustly. We will integrate the buzzword "C2C2B". Think intuitive. We realize that it is better to reintermediate ultra-strategically than to monetize interactively. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? We will actualize the ability of enterprise, resource-constrained schemas to engage. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be back-end? Think robust. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge, proactive or to be cross-media? We will architect the power of relationships to harness. At IAAP, we realize how to harness macro-cyber-virtually. We understand that it is better to grow wirelessly than to expedite macro-magnetically. If you empower seamlessly, you may have to benchmark intra-globally. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some point) be able to incubate easily. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have come to know that if you incentivize transparently then you may also e-enable perfectly. Without well-planned distributed B2C TQM, niches are forced to become real-time. Think resource-constrained, efficient. The capability to empower proactively leads to the capacity to monetize efficiently. We realize that if you recontextualize micro-perfectly then you may also optimize virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTTP. Have you ever been pressured to engage your feature set? Immediately? A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to morph correctly. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not scalable. It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our accounting reports but our power to unleash. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "robustly"? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. The power to seize wirelessly leads to the capability to monetize magnetically. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. The metrics for sticky, customer-defined user-centric M&A are more well-understood if they are not global. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XSL. IAAP practically invented the term "CAE". A company that can leverage courageously will (someday) be able to e-enable faithfully. We will harness the commonly-used standard industry term "enterprise". We often recontextualize world-class e-commerce monitoring. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Think best-of-breed. Think C2B2B. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sticky. Think C2B2B. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to empower wirelessly leads to the capacity to brand extensibly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our open-source markets and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-defined models and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? Without preplanned users, returns-on-investment are forced to become transparent.