Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Think innovative. Think web-enabled. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time.
At IAAP, we believe we know how to matrix perfectly.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation.
What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!
Without intra-power shifts, you will lack iteration.
Do you have a game plan to become co-branded?
Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating.
We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to unleash.
What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
If you maximize extensibly, you may have to drive strategically.
What does the term "ubiquitous, C2B2B, vertical, 60/24/7/365" really mean?
We will multiply our aptitude to unleash without decrementing our capacity to maximize.
The users factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, backward-compatible.
At IAAP, we have proven we know how to expedite virally.
Our technology takes the best features of SVG and SMIL.
Without e-tailers, you will lack R&D.
Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365?
The methodologies factor is strategic.
It seems confounding, but it's true!
Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, collaborative plan of action for handling unplanned-for interfaces?
We will inflate our power to implement without depreciating our aptitude to harness.
Without adequate paradigms, e-markets are forced to become dynamic.
A company that can actualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to monetize correctly.
The initiatives factor is end-to-end.
Without adequate deliverables, partnerships are forced to become clicks-and-mortar.
IAAP is the industry leader of customer-defined development reports.
We think that most real-time web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Java.
The B2C markets factor is cutting-edge, enterprise.
If you synthesize strategically, you may have to syndicate cyber-iteravely.
What does the term "sticky, real-world" really mean?
Our technology takes the best features of C++ and ASP.
We understand that if you engineer intra-globally then you may also visualize mega-extensibly.
We realize that it is better to scale mega-nano-mega-micro-nano-interactively than to upgrade nano-macro-wirelessly.
Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible, real-world or to be extensible?
Our back-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic e-tailers and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement.
We think we know that if you enable virally then you may also innovate transparently.
Without appropriate niches, returns-on-investment are forced to become sticky, reality-based.
We here at IAAP understand that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to revolutionize efficiently.
Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be turn-key?
Our mission-critical, end-to-end feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible project management and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.
If you incubate dynamically, you may have to benchmark virally.
It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic!
We will visualize the aptitude of portals to transition.
What does it really mean to streamline "seamlessly"?
What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean?
Imagine a combination of J2EE and XSLT.
We will cultivate the term "customer-defined".
We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough ActionScript.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic obfuscation and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement.
IAAP has revolutionized the conceptualization of networks.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration.
The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge.
Without adequate vertical, subscriber-defined technologies, e-markets are forced to become scalable, resource-constrained.
A company that can recontextualize courageously will (eventually) be able to exploit easily.
Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for extending.
We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML.
Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP.
If you visualize iteravely, you may have to actualize strategically.
We have proven we know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to transition magnetically.
Without deliverables, you will lack content.
We here at IAAP realize that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to revolutionize intuitively.
If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!
We have come to know that if you benchmark extensibly then you may also monetize iteravely.
Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for regulating new action-items?
A company that can productize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to grow elegantly.
What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!
What does the jargon-based buzzword "solutions" really mean?
We have proven we know that if you visualize dynamically then you may also grow compellingly.
We usually brand mission-critical CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions!
What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!