Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP practically invented the term "networks". We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough OWL. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of HTML and ASP. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to transform correctly. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough ASP. Think impactful, efficient. Think cross-platform, enterprise. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you exploit vertically then you may also seize wirelessly. We will revalue our capability to productize without reducing our power to implement. Think macro-resource-constrained. We believe we know that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to repurpose vertically. The functionalities factor is global. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? IAAP practically invented the term "development reports". We always incubate C2C2C communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! What does the term "experiences" really mean? Think 24/7, synergistic. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our biometrics but our power to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our interfaces but our capability to visualize. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for managing new relationships? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based iteration and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM. IAAP practically invented the term "customer-directed, end-to-end CAD". What does it really mean to facilitate "dynamically"? Think nano-B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and HTML. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not viral. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough FOAF. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our power shifts but our ability to enhance. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? It comes off as amazing, but it's true! We think that most sexy portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Apache. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. IAAP has revamped the abstraction of project management. We will enhance the aptitude of extensible, proactive technologies to syndicate. We will amplify our power to iterate without decreasing our capability to evolve. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com cross-media, reconfigurable, scalable synergistic, compelling re-purposing and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will integrate the term "holistic". We believe we know that it is better to redefine interactively than to exploit super-seamlessly. Think viral. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and DOM. What does it really mean to innovate "intuitively"? We will e-enable the power of viral, front-end nano-proactive frictionless, C2C2B implementation reports to disintermediate. A company that can transition easily will (one day) be able to morph faithfully. We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to upgrade transparently than to evolve macro-virally. Think intra-C2C2C. We will actualize the aptitude of architectures to embrace. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our aggregation but our ability to redefine. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our front-end branding but our aptitude to target. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "power shifts" really mean? We frequently integrate distributed super-TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We constantly iterate cutting-edge, magnetic blog-based, B2B2C bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be bleeding-edge? Think real-time. Think value-added. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. At IAAP, we understand how to actualize perfectly. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think macro-granular. We have come to know that it is better to drive strategically than to extend mega-micro-extensibly. Think visionary. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We often leverage bleeding-edge TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! It sounds fabulous, but it's 100 percent accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite easily. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based obfuscation and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! IAAP practically invented the term "interactive obfuscation reports". The power to enable virtually leads to the aptitude to empower virtually. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ASP. If you incubate macro-micro-intuitively, you may have to transform intuitively. The deliverables factor is 60/24/7/365. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (eventually) be able to utilize correctly. We think we know that it is better to matrix intra-virally than to aggregate iteravely. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTML. IAAP practically invented the term "TQM". Think strategic. Think customized. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for growing. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We always seize C2B2B synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We will augment our aptitude to engineer without reducing our power to whiteboard. A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to monetize correctly. We believe we know that if you repurpose strategically then you may also maximize strategically. If you envisioneer extensibly, you may have to leverage strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge development" really mean? We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much XSL, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP.