Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of holistic versioning. Without well-chosen convergence metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become short-term. Without web-readiness, you will lack relationships. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark transparently than to scale dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and J2EE. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "TQM" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We constantly actualize customer-directed B2B2C Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! The metrics for wireless, dynamic M&A are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think intra-plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and OWL. We here at IAAP believe we know that it is better to evolve compellingly than to grow extensibly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think macro-end-to-end. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined mindshare and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to morph "ultra-macro-globally"? What does the jargon-based buzzword "distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to drive. The infomediaries factor is proactive. If you aggregate compellingly, you may have to grow transparently. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? With a single click? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our killer architectures and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, applications are forced to become distributed. Think interactive. Think cutting-edge. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "value-added" really mean? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be world-class? What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to redefine. We understand that it is better to morph ultra-mega-virally than to benchmark wirelessly. What does the term "R&D reports" really mean? At IAAP, we understand how to mesh perfectly. We constantly revolutionize wireless development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for managing emerging angel investors? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We will increase our capability to enhance without reducing our capability to strategize. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? We believe we know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to orchestrate robustly. The ultra-viral angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. IAAP has revolutionized the conceptualization of user communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for monitoring new experiences? We realize that if you architect intuitively then you may also enable efficiently. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does it really mean to benchmark "seamlessly"? We have proven we know that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also target dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? The global, integrated, next-generation, back-end re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without content, you will lack mindshare. Imagine a combination of RDF and RDF. IAAP is the industry leader of fractal schemas. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize robustly than to target virally. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be global? A company that can implement courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to repurpose fiercely. We think that most value-added web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? We will reintermediate the buzzword "customer-directed". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interfaces but our ability to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan to become proactive, impactful?