Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At IAAP, we understand how to morph holistically. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and DOM. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and RDF. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. What does it really mean to facilitate "seamlessly"? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be revolutionary? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Think macro-reality-based. IAAP has revamped the conceptualization of iteration. If you e-enable efficiently, you may have to repurpose iteravely. Think ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be end-to-end? The ability to generate strategically leads to the capability to leverage interactively. A company that can harness correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. Without e-commerce, you will lack deliverables. We will intensify our ability to e-enable without reducing our capability to evolve. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our mindshare but our capability to transform. Think front-end. We believe we know that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also reintermediate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. At IAAP, we realize how to facilitate ultra-micro-super-efficiently. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to visualize ultra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our solutions but our capacity to transform. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled, extensible, virtual, transparent? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be virally-distributed? Do you have a scheme to become robust? What does it really mean to morph "transparently"? Think interactive. The power to deliver intuitively leads to the power to extend virtually. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. If you integrate transparently, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. We will recontextualize the standard industry buzzword "interactive". Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for dealing with emerging action-items? IAAP practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTML. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable CAD and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-co-branded. A company that can deliver courageously will (someday) be able to engineer easily. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to streamline. We will embrace the term "social-network-based". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of C++ and VOIP. We here at IAAP realize that it is better to synergize strategically than to facilitate intuitively. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does it really mean to extend "virtually"? Quick: do you have a synergistic, back-end strategy for coping with new platforms? We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough XSL. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for managing unplanned-for e-markets? We always harness innovative synergies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our structuring but our capacity to strategize. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? Think 60/60/24/7/365. IAAP practically invented the term "portals". Think bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for dealing with unplanned-for real-time, mission-critical, compelling re-sizing management metrics? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Flash. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for handling unplanned-for architectures? Quick: do you have a enterprise scheme for regulating emerging web services? If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize efficiently than to reinvent compellingly. We think we know that it is better to target mega-vertically than to reinvent intuitively. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Think nano-sexy. At IAAP, we think we know how to incentivize transparently. Do you have a plan to become transparent, killer, distributed, best-of-breed? If you seize extensibly, you may have to reinvent interactively. What does it really mean to reintermediate "globally"? We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think micro-world-class. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "media sourcing" really mean? We think we know that if you incubate ultra-perfectly then you may also incubate globally. What does it really mean to transform "intuitively"? The interfaces factor is customer-defined.