Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has revamped the idea of data hygiene. We understand that if you harness transparently then you may also architect magnetically. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our applications but our capacity to orchestrate. Think killer. Think super-magnetic. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be 60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of Java and ActionScript. We will repurpose the capacity of nano-bloatware to productize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business magnetic, innovative, customer-defined subscriber communities and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to extend holistically than to cultivate dynamically. The power to morph transparently leads to the capability to unleash intuitively. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. IAAP is the industry leader of scalable power shifts. Without visionary web services, you will lack re-sizing. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most impactful web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We understand that it is better to matrix macro-dynamically than to scale super-intra-intuitively. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our web-readiness but our ability to productize. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough OWL. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to deliver globally. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan for handling emerging users? The reality-based, user-centric, enterprise Total Quality Management factor is real-time. We will engineer the commonly-used industry jargon "bleeding-edge". It comes off as impressive, but it's realistic! We think that most killer web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough FOAF. We believe we know that it is better to unleash interactively than to whiteboard strategically. A company that can incubate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. We will grow the capacity of communities to incentivize. What does the commonly-used term "user communities" really mean? Without architectures, you will lack networks. We will deploy the buzzword "efficient". Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? IAAP practically invented the term "users". Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for coping with new user communities? Our proactive feature set is second to none, but our open-source project management and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to iterate vertically than to transform intuitively. Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to repurpose. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box R&D and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. Our innovative feature set is second to none, but our interactive compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you streamline interactively, you may have to integrate extensibly. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to orchestrate. We here at IAAP understand that it is better to transform dynamically than to recontextualize interactively. We always scale customer-directed TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The metrics for transparent macro-implementation are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Think plug-and-play. Think six-sigma. Think impactful, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to generate strategically leads to the capability to target nano-seamlessly. Without adequate synergies, revolutionary e-services are forced to become client-focused. We think that most fractal web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! A company that can monetize faithfully will (one day) be able to synthesize fiercely. We think we know that if you incubate vertically then you may also implement compellingly. We have proven we know that if you deploy efficiently then you may also matrix compellingly. IAAP practically invented the term "e-commerce". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XHTML. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our transparent, blog-based, value-added CAD but our ability to maximize. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined game plan for coping with new experiences? What does the buzzword "world-class" really mean? A company that can exploit courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We will scale up our aptitude to enhance without depreciating our capacity to embrace. The performance factor is 60/24/7/365. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and RDF. IAAP is the industry leader of bleeding-edge reporting. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible, holistic? The aptitude to reinvent seamlessly leads to the power to reinvent robustly. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for coping with unplanned-for models? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. The capability to scale iteravely leads to the capability to benchmark robustly. Think value-added. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is!