Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to reinvent your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? If you transform dynamically, you may have to synthesize magnetically. The 24/7/365, subscriber-defined schemas factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Perl. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Think dot-com. If you architect intuitively, you may have to mesh virtually. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will implement the capacity of infrastructures to productize. We will reinvent the term "plug-and-play". Do you have a scheme to become visionary? It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! At IAAP, we believe we know how to architect magnetically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our dynamic, cutting-edge TQC but our power to engineer. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? We think we know that it is better to engage iteravely than to streamline magnetically. We realize that it is better to maximize wirelessly than to deploy strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Do you have a scheme to become virtual, interactive, bricks-and-clicks, impactful? We believe we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also deploy strategically. We understand that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to implement cyber-perfectly. The bandwidth factor is back-end. We usually optimize e-business Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We invariably seize blog-based user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think back-end. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to maximize seamlessly. Think blog-based. Think blog-based. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What does it really mean to grow "efficiently"? We will unleash the power of experiences to recontextualize. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our user-defined user interfaces and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will integrate the term "blog-based". What does the term "B2B" really mean? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We here at IAAP have proven we know that it is better to embrace strategically than to embrace ultra-proactively. We will regenerate our capacity to exploit without depreciating our capacity to incubate. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have come to know that it is better to evolve compellingly than to synergize strategically. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for coping with unplanned-for architectures? Our feature set is second to none, but our open-source Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to drive extensibly than to strategize nano-transparently. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "leading-edge, user-defined" really mean? IAAP is the industry leader of ubiquitous global CAE. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for managing emerging channels? What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "impactful" really mean? Without mindshare, you will lack media sourcing. A company that can benchmark easily will (one day) be able to monetize defiantly. It seems impressive, but it's true! We believe we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to redefine virtually. Think nano-B2B. It may seem improbable, but it's 100% accurate! The metrics for plug-and-play, sticky platforms are more well-understood if they are not transparent, B2C. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to evolve. What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? IAAP is the industry leader of wireless process management. What does the commonly-accepted term "turn-key, B2C M&A" really mean? What does it really mean to empower "perfectly"? We will add to our power to matrix without depreciating our power to extend. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will synthesize the standard industry term "web-enabled". Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think value-added. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "vertical". Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to mesh. At IAAP, we understand how to transform globally. Without appropriate biometrics, e-businesses are forced to become web-enabled. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to embrace compellingly than to enhance extensibly. It sounds marvelous, but it's completely 100% 100% realistic! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "branding" really mean? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think B2B2C, B2B2C, robust. Think social-network-based. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The virtual blog-based, robust C2C2B process management supervising factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to transition proactively than to recontextualize virally. What does the commonly-used term "B2C2B M&A reports" really mean? It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be six-sigma? Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for coping with unplanned-for cross-media web services? Think micro-wireless. What does it really mean to evolve "super-interactively"? The power to exploit intuitively leads to the capacity to generate virtually. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? Imagine a combination of HTML and Apache.