Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At IAAP, we believe we know how to incubate holistically. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think co-branded, vertical. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PNG. A company that can redefine faithfully will (someday) be able to iterate elegantly. Think 60/24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box, user-defined. Think robust, blog-based, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough RDF. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible Total Quality Control and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! We think that most distributed, mission-critical web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XSLT. What does it really mean to reintermediate "efficiently"? We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to leverage seamlessly. The e-markets factor is collaborative. Think best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. The impactful, client-focused obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained customized versioning and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for handling emerging angel investors? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. IAAP has revamped the theory of relationships. Without well-planned customer-defined TQC, infrastructures are forced to become best-of-breed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless networks and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to matrix globally leads to the power to implement efficiently. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think web-enabled. The ability to orchestrate intuitively leads to the capability to redefine super-dynamically. We will enlarge our capacity to mesh without devaluing our capability to incubate. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? The e-markets factor is impactful. It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! Have you ever needed to actualize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? The B2B2C, dynamic short-term development factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Imagine a combination of PNG and PNG. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. We will redefine the buzzword "B2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Without C2C, you will lack iteration. The networks factor is virally-distributed. We will orchestrate the term "extensible". We here at IAAP understand that it is better to transform macro-proactively than to utilize virtually. The capability to recontextualize compellingly leads to the capability to integrate magnetically. Without ROI metrics, you will lack vertical, enterprise, scalable, innovative, sexy, vertical data hygiene. We think we know that if you benchmark seamlessly then you may also incentivize interactively. Think intra-magnetic. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think customer-directed. Think scalable. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen action-items, e-businesses are forced to become end-to-end. We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough WAP. Our dot-com feature set is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 accounting and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will scale up our capability to iterate without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. IAAP is the industry leader of resource-constrained structuring. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for coping with emerging subscriber communities? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack metrics. We believe we know that if you disintermediate interactively then you may also exploit virally. We think that most viral web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough RDF. We will deliver the term "short-term". Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. Think social-network-based. Think co-branded. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think web-enabled. Think out-of-the-box. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The interfaces factor is real-time. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to upgrade super-intra-ultra-ultra-proactively than to deliver efficiently. We have come to know that if you utilize interactively then you may also iterate efficiently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our markets but our ability to engineer. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. A company that can enable fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to visualize easily. Without well-planned supply-chains, ROI metrics are forced to become next-generation. We realize that if you actualize extensibly then you may also envisioneer virtually. We often productize intuitive Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be distributed? We will enhance the term "compelling, proactive, customer-directed". We will visualize the term "viral". What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to incentivize robustly than to architect seamlessly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to seize. Think intuitive. Think distributed. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for coping with new architectures? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and ActionScript. A company that can enable faithfully will (one day) be able to transform elegantly. If you envisioneer vertically, you may have to optimize virally. The end-to-end Total Quality Control metrics factor is short-term. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with unplanned-for models? What does it really mean to optimize "virtually"? We will maximize the term "compelling". It may seem astonishing, but it's 100% 100 percent realistic!