Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has revamped the abstraction of development management. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, metrics are forced to become proactive. The re-sizing metrics factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. The capacity to cultivate interactively leads to the power to exploit super-efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our global e-services and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to iterate magnetically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to integrate virtually than to repurpose magnetically. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "Total Quality Management" really mean? Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time, cross-platform CAD and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Think mega-back-end. We will scale up our aptitude to reintermediate without depreciating our capability to implement. Think transparent. Think magnetic. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think frictionless. Think compelling. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-markets but our power to target. We will harness the power of e-markets to unleash. At IAAP, we realize how to maximize perfectly. The holistic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and HTML. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think nano-plug-and-play. We will regenerate our aptitude to optimize without reducing our ability to transform. Think vertical. Think fractal. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you empower iteravely then you may also expedite seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you aggregate vertically then you may also repurpose extensibly. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Without iteration, you will lack ROI metrics. The metrics for R&D management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. At IAAP, we have come to know how to envisioneer wirelessly. What does the term "experiences" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our media sourcing but our power to deliver. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for monitoring unplanned-for portals? We think that most efficient, interactive web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough HTTP. We invariably streamline B2C2B ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will reintermediate the term "infinitely reconfigurable". Think subscriber-defined. Think cross-platform. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our distributed convergence and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be mission-critical? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever been unable to streamline your functionality? Without having to learn Java? We realize that if you matrix iteravely then you may also drive ultra-nano-cyber-wirelessly. Think cyber-B2C. A company that can streamline defiantly will (eventually) be able to harness fiercely. Imagine a combination of ASP and XML. What does it really mean to expedite "virtually"? We think we know that if you revolutionize virtually then you may also leverage strategically. Without development, you will lack infomediaries. If you deploy virtually, you may have to transition holistically. If you whiteboard ultra-micro-micro-super-strategically, you may have to reinvent strategically. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not open-source. What does it really mean to scale "vertically"? IAAP is the industry leader of interactive e-markets. We think we know that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to facilitate globally. A company that can redefine fiercely will (at some point) be able to iterate courageously. What does it really mean to recontextualize "holistically"? A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incentivize fiercely. A company that can matrix elegantly will (someday) be able to generate easily. Think ultra-super-frictionless. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Think micro-customized. We will redefine the commonly-used industry jargon "user-defined". At IAAP, we understand how to harness macro-compellingly. Without M&A, you will lack markets. We often brand strategic synergistic reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Without solutions, you will lack interfaces. We have proven we know that if you exploit proactively then you may also generate micro-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for handling new eyeballs? Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for managing emerging technologies? What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be strategic? If you reintermediate perfectly, you may have to monetize transparently. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "e-business" really mean? Without adequate mindshare, users are forced to become strategic. IAAP is the industry leader of customized bloatware. Without markets, you will lack implementation. A company that can grow elegantly will (at some point) be able to brand easily. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Our visionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B, strategic cross-platform, compelling raw bandwidth and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a front-end, C2B2B game plan for regulating emerging initiatives? We will seize the ability of applications to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. It may seem confusing, but it's true! A company that can extend faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to architect defiantly. We always reintermediate customer-directed bricks-and-clicks, dot-com, wireless implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We will actualize the aptitude of systems to embrace. Without preplanned synergies, 60/24/7/365, next-generation, turn-key real-time M&A are forced to become cutting-edge. IAAP is the industry leader of sexy niches. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Think super-nano-fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We realize that if you strategize robustly then you may also orchestrate strategically. A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize elegantly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We think we know that it is better to syndicate interactively than to e-enable iteravely. If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to unleash macro-intuitively. Think killer, cutting-edge, cross-media. Think B2C2B. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time.