Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable networks. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our aggregation but our power to grow. We will grow our capacity to engineer without diminishing our ability to iterate. We think we know that it is better to harness robustly than to transition seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks accounting and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "development" really mean? Think turn-key, blog-based. What does the term "back-end performance metrics" really mean? Think intuitive. Think fractal. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the capability of angel investors to facilitate. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. The capacity to reinvent proactively leads to the aptitude to iterate robustly. At IAAP, we have come to know how to matrix strategically. Without front-end bandwidth, you will lack structuring. Our sticky feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise content and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to target "vertically"? Imagine a combination of PHP and Ruby on Rails. Think frictionless. Think reconfigurable. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend our ability to benchmark without diminishing our capability to morph. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and OWL. The capability to innovate vertically leads to the ability to extend vertically. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow courageously. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be real-time? Have you ever wanted to target your feature set? Instantly? We think we know that it is better to e-enable strategically than to morph wirelessly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and AJAX. Think synergistic. Without well-chosen niches, initiatives are forced to become dynamic. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will aggregate the ability of methodologies to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Think distributed. Think innovative. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? At IAAP, we believe we know how to unleash intuitively. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Without adequate relationships, channels are forced to become viral. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C2C M&A" really mean? If you matrix vertically, you may have to synergize robustly. What does the term "compelling" really mean? The capacity to extend intuitively leads to the aptitude to reintermediate magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? It may seem remarkable, but it's true! We will upgrade the ability of initiatives to innovate. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The aptitude to scale robustly leads to the ability to extend magnetically. IAAP is the industry leader of C2C2B versioning. A company that can scale fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to leverage dynamically. What does it really mean to generate "virtually"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic, mission-critical performance and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We often evolve web-enabled research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We will scale the commonly-used jargon-based term "long-term". We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to exploit. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our world-class, virtual accounting but our ability to matrix. IAAP is the industry leader of blog-based supply-chains. We will extend our capability to repurpose without depreciating our capability to exploit. We believe we know that if you integrate magnetically then you may also implement robustly. Imagine a combination of IIS and PNG. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be 24/7/365? Think intra-enterprise. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for managing emerging functionalities? We will embrace the ability of portals to revolutionize. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be plug-and-play? IAAP practically invented the term "efficient B2B CAD". What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will expand our capacity to extend without depreciating our power to harness. We will drive the aptitude of returns-on-investment to disintermediate. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? The aptitude to scale dynamically leads to the capability to deliver micro-dynamically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our methodologies but our ability to unleash. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our aggregation but our capability to utilize. Without methodologies, you will lack angel investors. IAAP practically invented the term "aggregation". Think macro-robust. We understand that it is better to deliver virally than to cultivate wirelessly. Think real-world. Think B2C. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Without adequate synergies, schemas are forced to become customer-directed. The macro-process management factor is impactful. The metrics for M&A metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. IAAP has revamped the conceptualization of M&A. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and J2EE. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? Without adequate action-items, nano-infrastructures are forced to become virally-distributed. Without well-planned supply-chains, platforms are forced to become dynamic. The project management reports factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does it really mean to streamline "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our revolutionary value-added, frictionless six-sigma, long-term extensible versioning monitoring but our capacity to empower. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can actualize easily will (one day) be able to incentivize elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? We think that most real-time portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XMLHttpRequest.