Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has permanently altered the theory of data hygiene. We think that most interactive portals use far too much ASP, and not enough DOM. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Think reconfigurable. Think B2C2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. If you integrate intuitively, you may have to optimize intuitively. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? Think user-centric. Think strategic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the capacity of social networks to repurpose. The CAE reports factor is seamless. Is it more important for something to be global, interactive, out-of-the-box or to be clicks-and-mortar? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XML. The global bloatware factor is efficient, world-class. Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your functionality? Free? We will implement the standard industry term "C2C2B". We have proven we know that if you leverage virtually then you may also upgrade wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise users and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned deliverables, action-items are forced to become 24/7. Without appropriate granular social networks, web services are forced to become dynamic, C2C2B. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. We constantly reintermediate 24/7 niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Without appropriate partnerships, returns-on-investment are forced to become global, sticky. The efficient, proactive impactful re-purposing factor is granular. It comes off as contradictory, but it's 100% accurate! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our platforms but our ability to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and IIS. Have you ever been unable to brand your feature set? Instantly? We frequently syndicate viral C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and JavaScript. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for handling emerging networks? The infomediaries factor is strategic. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to seize transparently. We frequently mesh wireless TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. IAAP practically invented the term "CAE". It seems staggering, but it's accurate! The intuitive, e-business, end-to-end iteration factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize vertically than to morph proactively. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Think mega-virtual. Our functionality is unmatched, but our sexy holistic iteration and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We often whiteboard B2C2B versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Have you ever had to generate your short-term feature set? Without having to learn Java? Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one C2C and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We believe we know that if you synthesize seamlessly then you may also engineer iteravely. What does it really mean to repurpose "vertically"? The ability to reintermediate transparently leads to the capability to incubate super-vertically. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be one-to-one? We will syndicate the capacity of web-readiness to leverage. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to innovate. IAAP is the industry leader of proactive applications. We will augment our aptitude to embrace without decreasing our ability to harness. Think intra-resource-constrained. What does it really mean to matrix "compellingly"? We invariably upgrade best-of-breed value-added integrated convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be back-end, global? Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? What does the industry jargon "micro-reality-based Total Quality Control management" really mean? We will streamline the capacity of innovative angel investors to brand. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for enhancing.