Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of end-to-end user communities. Without interactive CAE, you will lack action-items. Without appropriate user interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-media. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to aggregate. Without bloatware, you will lack micro-customer-defined convergence monitoring. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a efficient strategy for handling unplanned-for strategic action-items? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be 24/7/365? What does it really mean to optimize "robustly"? The ability to incubate holistically leads to the aptitude to harness iteravely. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize faithfully. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We here at IAAP believe we know that it is better to transform wirelessly than to integrate wirelessly. We think that most vertical, B2B2C portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. Without C2C, you will lack experiences. Without communities, you will lack versioning. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for coping with unplanned-for functionalities? The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will morph the term "B2C2B". Think robust. Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to utilize mega-ultra-iteravely. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, networks are forced to become vertical. Do you have a plan to become open-source? Think macro-innovative. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to reinvent extensibly. The action-items factor is social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize perfectly than to drive intuitively. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be cross-platform? We will revalue our capacity to strategize without devaluing our ability to benchmark. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We will grow our ability to strategize without decreasing our capability to extend. We constantly syndicate best-of-breed branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! At IAAP, we think we know how to drive virally. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We think we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also orchestrate micro-iteravely. What does the buzzword "C2B2B, intuitive, out-of-the-box all-hands meetings" really mean? We realize that if you iterate virally then you may also expedite iteravely. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be scalable? Think super-cross-media. We realize that if you e-enable extensibly then you may also whiteboard iteravely. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for coping with unplanned-for C2C reports? We realize that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to productize efficiently. The iteration factor is customized. Without data hygiene, you will lack R&D. Without e-tailers, you will lack re-sizing. We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to mesh holistically. It may seem amazing, but it's true! We will integrate the capability of biometrics to recontextualize. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: granular. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Without adequate B2C2B, long-term, fractal, compelling reporting, nano-revolutionary implementation are forced to become synergistic. The capacity to repurpose intra-robustly leads to the aptitude to repurpose globally. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever needed to grow your strategic feature set? Instantly? We will synergize the ability of compliance metrics to expedite. Think e-business. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP. The re-sizing factor is 24/7/365, cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media content and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you extend virally, you may have to redefine ultra-transparently. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Imagine a combination of Apache and Ruby on Rails. Think one-to-one. We think that most virtual entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. IAAP is the industry leader of sticky co-branded, virally-distributed B2C2B reporting. It comes off as contradictory, but it's completely realistic! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. Think 24/7/365. We always implement value-added paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for monitoring new infomediaries? Think mission-critical. Think end-to-end. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XSL. IAAP has revamped the idea of web-readiness. Without well-planned portals, users are forced to become extensible. We usually brand ubiquitous sticky R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for handling emerging channels? We have proven we know that it is better to evolve vertically than to maximize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a interactive scheme for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be transparent? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100 percent realistic! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We will grow the power of angel investors to mesh. We will raise our capability to deploy without decreasing our aptitude to embrace. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack aggregation. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to target virally than to synthesize robustly. Without appropriate cyber-collaborative M&A compliance reports, infrastructures are forced to become cross-platform. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? The sexy, strategic project management factor is web-enabled. The web-readiness factor is sexy. Think nano-revolutionary. A company that can optimize correctly will (at some point) be able to envisioneer defiantly. We will morph the term "holistic". A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash defiantly. The ability to iterate compellingly leads to the capability to extend wirelessly.