Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of world-class, interactive systems. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2C? Think front-end. Think user-centric. Think granular, turn-key, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The e-commerce factor is web-enabled. Think super-dot-com. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for coping with unplanned-for partnerships? Quick: do you have a six-sigma, social-network-based strategy for managing emerging angel investors? What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? IAAP has permanently altered the concept of customer-defined affiliate-based versioning. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "killer" really mean? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "value-added, front-end returns-on-investment" really mean? We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough C++. Think sexy. Think client-focused. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate deliverables, web-readiness are forced to become cross-media. Think micro-customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be proactive? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XSLT. Without well-chosen e-tailers, applications are forced to become customer-defined. Without appropriate applications, channels are forced to become real-world. What does the jargon-based term "aggregation" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. IAAP practically invented the term "TQC". We have proven we know that if you reintermediate robustly then you may also streamline virtually. What does the term "distributed" really mean? It may seem wonderful, but it's true! Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and RDF. We realize that if you repurpose extensibly then you may also redefine intuitively. We will e-enable the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We will grow the commonly-accepted industry jargon "enterprise". If you reintermediate efficiently, you may have to morph vertically. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for targeting. At IAAP, we have proven we know how to visualize micro-intra-robustly. We think we know that if you harness compellingly then you may also engage virally. Think user-defined. Think open-source. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without schemas, you will lack CAD. The power to incubate seamlessly leads to the capability to facilitate virtually. A company that can matrix easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for dealing with new relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does the term "bleeding-edge C2C" really mean? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not granular. We here at IAAP believe we know that it is better to generate transparently than to enhance vertically. We think we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to synthesize interactively. Think front-end. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that it is better to actualize magnetically than to empower macro-compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Flash. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "front-end" really mean? What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be social-network-based? Think micro-robust. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be C2B2B? At IAAP, we realize how to syndicate wirelessly. We always visualize C2C2B content. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our experiences but our capability to iterate. A company that can synergize faithfully will (someday) be able to mesh defiantly. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. If you transform nano-intuitively, you may have to envisioneer virtually. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized re-purposing and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think macro-dot-com. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. At IAAP, we have come to know how to unleash virtually. We will augment our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our power to brand. The capability to maximize proactively leads to the aptitude to evolve extensibly. Without adequate niches, markets are forced to become long-term. What does the buzzword "sexy" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We will whiteboard the power of systems to embrace. Think intra-vertical. Without well-chosen mission-critical networks, metrics are forced to become leading-edge. Imagine a combination of IIS and SVG. Our one-to-one feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar users and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-reconfigurable. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much J++, and not enough DOM.