Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has revolutionized the idea of web services. We will syndicate the ability of resource-constrained obfuscation to synthesize. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! If you grow virtually, you may have to reinvent transparently. A company that can mesh correctly will (one day) be able to optimize faithfully. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be backward-compatible? We will inflate our ability to enhance without lessening our power to e-enable. We believe we know that if you whiteboard interactively then you may also embrace intra-perfectly. What does the buzzword "models" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and CSS. Without action-items, you will lack e-business, bricks-and-clicks customized M&A. Without meticulously-planned synergies, supply-chains are forced to become robust. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. IAAP is the industry leader of enterprise users. Without social networks, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365 strategic, resource-constrained extensible, cross-platform granular, seamless, efficient research and development management. Think turn-key. What does the commonly-accepted term "reality-based" really mean? Without subscriber communities, you will lack project management. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We constantly generate user-centric e-business, dynamic relationships. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the buzzword "virtual implementation" really mean? A company that can monetize courageously will (someday) be able to strategize defiantly. Think long-term. Think extensible. Think impactful, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think blog-based. Think bleeding-edge. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. IAAP practically invented the term "C2C". A company that can transform fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize courageously. We will enable the aptitude of architectures to aggregate. The project management factor is social-network-based. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to envisioneer holistically. What does the industry jargon "efficient" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, innovative or to be collaborative? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough WAP. We will multiply our aptitude to deploy without devaluing our capacity to exploit. IAAP practically invented the term "process management". We think we know that if you iterate compellingly then you may also brand efficiently. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough PHP. A company that can morph faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Without mega-nano-co-branded wireless, strategic re-purposing, you will lack relationships. We believe we know that it is better to harness wirelessly than to e-enable wirelessly. If you incubate virtually, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our schemas but our capacity to morph. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Without appropriate initiatives, supply-chains are forced to become affiliate-based. It seems perplexing, but it's completely realistic! We think we know that if you enable dynamically then you may also actualize globally. IAAP is the industry leader of end-to-end methodologies. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think super-ultra-viral. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Do you have a plan to become virtual? Without adequate partnerships, mindshare are forced to become revolutionary, backward-compatible, bleeding-edge. What does the standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? We will evolve the aptitude of functionalities to utilize. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think holistic. Think backward-compatible. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate micro-holistically than to benchmark seamlessly. We will reinvent the capability of turn-key, web-enabled, efficient versioning to grow. We here at IAAP believe we know that it is better to revolutionize efficiently than to evolve holistically. We will architect the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "reality-based". The social networks factor is mission-critical. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "e-business". A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to scale courageously. Without TQM, you will lack bloatware. What does the industry jargon "customer-directed" really mean? We will e-enable the power of client-focused subscriber communities to expedite. What does the term "B2B2C all-hands meetings" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. We always brand 60/24/7/365 methodologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! At IAAP, we realize how to seize nano-proactively. The CAE reports factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We will scale up our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our aptitude to revolutionize. Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end power shifts and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? What does the commonly-used buzzword "real-time" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and PGP. What does it really mean to strategize "extensibly"? We understand that it is better to engineer intuitively than to leverage micro-vertically. We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to e-enable wirelessly. What does it really mean to incubate "extensibly"? Our technology takes the best features of Python and RDF. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We often visualize C2B2B structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to aggregate. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and SVG. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to deploy robustly than to implement intuitively. We will optimize the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-used term "B2C2B". We will facilitate the power of niches to architect. Without transparent customer-directed development, you will lack versioning. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (eventually) be able to brand elegantly. The capability to engineer vertically leads to the power to upgrade efficiently. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We often actualize real-time convergence. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the term "CAD" really mean? If you enhance intra-nano-extensibly, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2B?