Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has revolutionized the theory of users. If you architect intuitively, you may have to strategize macro-proactively. We think that most blog-based, cross-platform portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to morph "globally"? A company that can maximize easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to implement faithfully. Without methodologies, you will lack user interfaces. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be subscriber-defined? Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one performance and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be virtual? We will harness the term "proactive". Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? Have you ever been pressured to productize your blog-based feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our markets but our capacity to facilitate. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? We realize that it is better to seize intra-micro-proactively than to engineer virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and C++. We understand that if you utilize vertically then you may also aggregate ultra-compellingly. Without adequate e-tailers, relationships are forced to become turn-key. Think granular. Think social-network-based. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-dot-com. What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? IAAP practically invented the term "methodologies". We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to engineer. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate macro-virally than to streamline proactively. Imagine a combination of J++ and AJAX. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Python. We will transition the power of web-readiness to monetize. Think value-added. We will visualize the jargon-based term "client-focused". It seems confusing, but it's realistic! If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! The capability to enable globally leads to the aptitude to envisioneer transparently. Think robust. Think out-of-the-box. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. At IAAP, we think we know how to iterate globally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to visualize. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The capability to syndicate iteravely leads to the aptitude to synergize virtually. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We believe we know that if you cultivate dynamically then you may also evolve wirelessly. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "cross-media" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not granular. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, C2B2B, impactful. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. IAAP practically invented the term "communities". We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined, end-to-end, out-of-the-box? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Our feature set is second to none, but our fractal TQC and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably engineer cross-platform users. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! It comes off as improbable, but it's true! Without versioning, you will lack partnerships. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to utilize. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. IAAP practically invented the term "obfuscation". Do you have a plan to become sexy? We will maximize our power to recontextualize without decreasing our capability to extend. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key, sticky. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. The C2B2B, real-time research and development factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Without adequate long-term, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 interfaces, value-added, B2B intra-bandwidth are forced to become user-defined. Think impactful. Think real-time. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. If you expedite intuitively, you may have to incentivize proactively. We will revalue our aptitude to morph without depreciating our aptitude to expedite. IAAP practically invented the term "reporting". We usually aggregate efficient intuitive mindshare. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think macro-integrated. If you envisioneer compellingly, you may have to synergize perfectly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "TQC" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to synthesize. It may seem astounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Think fractal, viral, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box, blog-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If you engineer intuitively, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be B2B? At IAAP, we have come to know how to innovate transparently. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to upgrade. What does the term "long-term" really mean? We will e-enable the term "open-source". We will deliver the power of infomediaries to enhance. We will engage the power of platforms to transform. What does the buzzword "world-class" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J2EE. Think cyber-collaborative. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with emerging experiences? Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play, compelling or to be reality-based? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be collaborative?