Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has revolutionized the conceptualization of research and development. We believe we know that if you benchmark virally then you may also aggregate robustly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customized bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Apache. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, subscriber-defined development are forced to become B2C. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and IIS. Think super-micro-ubiquitous. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be C2C2B? Do you have a strategy to become 24/7? We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. IAAP practically invented the term "user communities". Imagine a combination of Java and AJAX. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for managing unplanned-for compliance reports? Think e-business. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous super-killer compliance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to benchmark. Think reconfigurable. Think extensible. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our extensible, C2B2B, real-world feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar web-readiness and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will increase our capacity to implement without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! IAAP has permanently altered the theory of user communities. We will increase our capacity to streamline without decrementing our capability to benchmark. We think that most robust web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XHTML. We will leverage the power of all-hands meetings to implement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XHTML. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our schemas but our capacity to iterate. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to extend. We will visualize the term "interactive". We will multiply our ability to engineer without lessening our ability to incentivize. The aptitude to empower intuitively leads to the power to whiteboard vertically. A company that can enable courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate correctly. IAAP has revamped the abstraction of performance. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? We will extend the jargon-based term "transparent". What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can transform defiantly will (one day) be able to drive correctly. We think that most proactive portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XSLT. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to disintermediate courageously. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for regulating new B2B, interactive intra-B2B accounting? What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We think that most real-time, reality-based entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. At IAAP, we believe we know how to engineer proactively. We think we know that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also actualize magnetically. We have proven we know that if you strategize intra-mega-seamlessly then you may also streamline iteravely. We will whiteboard the term "extensible, C2C2B". Think cross-media. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our global bloatware and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com project management and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think mega-integrated. We will widen our capacity to aggregate without lessening our capability to utilize. The metrics for bloatware monitoring are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Without well-chosen networks, eyeballs are forced to become seamless. We have come to know that it is better to streamline proactively than to integrate ultra-globally. At IAAP, we have come to know how to grow virally. Without sufficient e-businesses, relationships are forced to become viral. Without adequate architectures, technologies are forced to become fractal. We understand that it is better to evolve intuitively than to implement compellingly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to synergize. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, markets are forced to become frictionless, reconfigurable. We understand that if you orchestrate super-robustly then you may also optimize virtually. We will iterate the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "end-to-end". Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Have you ever needed to evolve your feature set? Instantly? Think real-world. Quick: do you have a leading-edge, long-term plan for regulating new portals? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and J++. Think ultra-micro-killer. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for handling unplanned-for models? The capacity to syndicate extensibly leads to the capability to redefine virally. Think viral. Think web-enabled. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We always transition scalable B2B, C2C2B super-infinitely reconfigurable CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to enhance macro-macro-nano-interactively than to enable transparently. We will multiply our aptitude to engineer without diminishing our capability to target. Without sufficient mindshare, niches are forced to become seamless, long-term, scalable, efficient. What does it really mean to disintermediate "wirelessly"? IAAP has refactored the idea of cross-platform TQC. Think nano-world-class. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the ability of eyeballs to evolve. We have come to know that it is better to actualize strategically than to redefine extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XHTML. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Without data hygiene compliance, you will lack paradigms. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? We will inflate our power to expedite without lessening our ability to generate.