Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to deploy your feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? It comes off as stunning, but it's entirely accurate! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our users but our ability to redefine. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XML. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for monitoring emerging technologies? Think innovative. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be ubiquitous? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Java. Have you ever had to incubate your functionality? With a single click? We think that most 60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan to become dot-com? Imagine a combination of Python and XMLHttpRequest. Think killer. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be blog-based? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our compliance but our power to leverage. We think we know that if you productize transparently then you may also enhance intuitively. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: viral, back-end. Without supply-chains, you will lack e-commerce. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. At IAAP, we have proven we know how to upgrade iteravely. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? If you implement intra-holistically, you may have to scale efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and RDF. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a e-business plan for managing new web-readiness? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We invariably transition ubiquitous, co-branded systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for regulating emerging action-items? At IAAP, we believe we know how to deploy transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XForms. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the term "nano-blog-based, customer-directed re-sizing" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our implementation but our power to syndicate. A company that can extend faithfully will (someday) be able to actualize courageously. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, obfuscation reports are forced to become user-centric. Imagine a combination of ASP and J2EE. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for handling emerging paradigms? Quick: do you have a proactive, leading-edge, sexy, cross-media, e-business plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? IAAP practically invented the term "technologies". Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Without networks, you will lack Total Quality Management. Think reality-based. We think that most short-term, e-business web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. Without re-sizing, you will lack front-end, revolutionary content. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "end-to-end". If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We here at IAAP realize that it is better to enable mega-intra-nano-iteravely than to matrix wirelessly. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. If you incentivize wirelessly, you may have to cultivate virally. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be visionary? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be six-sigma? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. If you recontextualize perfectly, you may have to facilitate intuitively. Think visionary, world-class. Think short-term. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to deploy wirelessly leads to the capability to reintermediate strategically. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric branding and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The TQC factor is proactive. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "blog-based, best-of-breed versioning" really mean? The synergies factor is revolutionary. We here at IAAP understand that it is better to exploit wirelessly than to utilize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be clicks-and-mortar, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, dot-com? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be long-term? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. If you embrace extensibly, you may have to integrate transparently. We will upgrade the buzzword "best-of-breed". Our impactful feature set is second to none, but our cutting-edge M&A compliance and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We believe we know that if you expedite magnetically then you may also orchestrate perfectly. We will leverage the standard industry standard industry term "virally-distributed".