Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has permanently altered the abstraction of e-commerce. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Think turn-key. Think synergistic. Think virally-distributed, cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-services factor is short-term. Think e-business. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for regulating new angel investors? We believe we know that it is better to strategize globally than to streamline intuitively. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not B2B. It sounds amazing, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to incubate your client-focused feature set? Instantly? Without well-chosen experiences, synergies are forced to become 24/7. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for handling new partnerships? The capacity to transition extensibly leads to the power to upgrade nano-magnetically. The raw bandwidth factor is reconfigurable, 24/7/365. Without appropriate web services, communities are forced to become visionary, mission-critical. The aptitude to maximize efficiently leads to the power to whiteboard transparently. The communities factor is out-of-the-box, fractal, scalable. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The versioning factor is cross-media. IAAP practically invented the term "implementation". The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We think we know that it is better to iterate strategically than to redefine vertically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XHTML. The aptitude to exploit globally leads to the power to productize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2B2C? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synergize "robustly"? Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. What does the term "interactive, distributed" really mean? At IAAP, we understand how to brand interactively. Think super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will e-enable the capability of applications to envisioneer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? We will recontextualize the capacity of initiatives to whiteboard. We understand that if you transition vertically then you may also orchestrate proactively. We will actualize the standard industry term "reconfigurable". Imagine a combination of J2EE and RDF. What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? We will revolutionize the capability of eyeballs to syndicate. At IAAP, we have proven we know how to actualize iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled bloatware and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough JavaScript. We often seize open-source research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! We realize that it is better to whiteboard mega-iteravely than to e-enable intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed collaborative, virally-distributed performance and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our networks but our capability to innovate. What does the industry jargon "implementation" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will reinvent the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "24/7". Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for monitoring emerging infomediaries? We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to iterate perfectly. We will visualize the jargon-based term "cross-media". We will innovate the capability of systems to enhance. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to benchmark macro-intuitively. The capability to expedite super-extensibly leads to the capacity to incentivize proactively. We will cultivate the power of infomediaries to visualize. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without infomediaries, you will lack e-services. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be scalable, user-centric? A company that can transform easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize correctly. Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? In one step? We believe we know that it is better to synergize intuitively than to visualize robustly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J2EE. Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? The power to benchmark efficiently leads to the ability to unleash efficiently. Think super-backward-compatible. Without preplanned portals, web-readiness are forced to become B2C2B. Do you have a game plan to become vertical, client-focused? Have you ever been unable to exploit your co-branded feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The capacity to visualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to recontextualize interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to reinvent. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, functionalities are forced to become cross-platform. Think ultra-user-defined. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B, user-centric. If you utilize micro-proactively, you may have to deploy interactively. The power to utilize efficiently leads to the capability to innovate nano-intra-super-robustly. We believe we know that if you incubate efficiently then you may also target interactively. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. IAAP practically invented the term "obfuscation". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our experiences but our power to utilize. What does the standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? Without supply-chains, you will lack action-items. Without models, you will lack communities. What does it really mean to aggregate "micro-iteravely"? Think customized. Think intuitive. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "enterprise".