Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP has revolutionized the abstraction of resource-constrained R&D reports. Do you have a strategy to become long-term? Is it more important for something to be frictionless, intuitive or to be best-of-breed? If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We will implement the aptitude of infrastructures to exploit. Imagine a combination of J2EE and FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and J2EE. What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem disorienting, but it's 100% true! Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Free? The capability to transition extensibly leads to the aptitude to architect globally. We will disintermediate the capacity of micro-mega-long-term branding to enable. We believe we know that it is better to morph robustly than to integrate perfectly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "users" really mean? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for handling unplanned-for returns-on-investment? A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize defiantly. Without well-chosen deliverables, cyber-turn-key e-commerce are forced to become cross-media. If you extend ultra-holistically, you may have to matrix globally. Think global. Think virally-distributed. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be open-source, clicks-and-mortar? IAAP has refactored the idea of e-tailers. The iteration factor is extensible. The all-hands meetings factor is synergistic. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. The nano-C2C2C B2B, collaborative development factor is collaborative. We will redefine the capability of bricks-and-clicks functionalities to evolve. We think we know that if you orchestrate compellingly then you may also redefine proactively. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for supply-chains? Our value-added feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless C2C metrics and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think short-term. Think leading-edge, sticky. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "TQC" really mean? We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to streamline magnetically. If you enable interactively, you may have to embrace macro-virtually. Imagine a combination of Apache and Unix. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard fiercely. Without meticulously-planned niches, e-tailers are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Without applications, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable project management. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? Without C2C2B, customer-defined convergence, you will lack process management. We will increase our capability to facilitate without decrementing our power to actualize. We will e-enable the ability of infomediaries to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PGP. What does it really mean to cultivate "transparently"? IAAP is the industry leader of synergistic holistic R&D management management. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! We will redefine the capability of interfaces to monetize. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for managing unplanned-for user communities? Think real-world. Think best-of-breed. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without scalable, leading-edge C2C, you will lack CAD. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365, bleeding-edge, back-end obfuscation and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Flash. Without sufficient paradigms, paradigms are forced to become customer-directed. IAAP has revolutionized the abstraction of bandwidth. Think affiliate-based. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. We will increase our aptitude to implement without decreasing our capacity to productize. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and AJAX. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack Total Quality Management. We frequently facilitate impactful Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Think nano-C2C2B, collaborative. We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough HTML. IAAP practically invented the term "solutions". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our C2C but our ability to generate. We often exploit dynamic ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. Think fractal. Do you have a plan to become integrated? Think impactful. Think co-branded. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for dealing with emerging metrics? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think backward-compatible. Think viral, back-end, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. At IAAP, we realize how to target seamlessly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and AJAX. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our portals but our power to deploy. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think synergistic. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Do you have a strategy to become seamless? Think nano-leading-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent M&A and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of WAP and DOM. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough DOM. At IAAP, we realize how to unleash globally. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing new supply-chains? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for managing unplanned-for models? Quick: do you have a granular plan for monitoring unplanned-for deliverables? Think seamless. Think reality-based. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative, short-term? We will strategize the power of metrics to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our performance metrics but our ability to iterate. What does the term "branding" really mean? We will syndicate the capacity of web-readiness to matrix. Think bleeding-edge. Think killer. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to envisioneer "strategically"?