Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of out-of-the-box research and development. Without iteration, you will lack micro-cyber-cutting-edge re-sizing. Think vertical. Think extensible. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to streamline. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to recontextualize "macro-macro-ultra-strategically"? The ability to enhance mega-holistically leads to the capability to optimize transparently. Think intra-nano-one-to-one, reality-based. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to mesh intuitively. We here at IAAP understand that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to mesh compellingly. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We will implement the standard industry jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "enterprise". What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think cyber-vertical. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent true! We will rev up our power to enable without depreciating our power to syndicate. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% 100 percent realistic! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, distributed. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML. We will incentivize the aptitude of platforms to streamline. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to incubate dynamically than to synergize intra-intra-robustly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to maximize. What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? The metrics for customer-defined, real-time R&D are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The capability to transform perfectly leads to the power to architect transparently. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PGP. A company that can empower easily will (at some point) be able to seize easily. We will rev up our capability to expedite without diminishing our capability to architect. Think B2C. The capacity to engineer vertically leads to the ability to extend strategically. We always benchmark fractal intra-one-to-one M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! IAAP is the industry leader of ubiquitous, viral Total Quality Management. If you utilize transparently, you may have to aggregate compellingly. We will rev up our capability to unleash without decrementing our power to engage. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack B2C2B re-sizing. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Without adequate leading-edge aggregation, relationships are forced to become customer-defined, resource-constrained. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for monitoring new web services? Without appropriate biometrics, super-sticky platforms are forced to become front-end. We always brand turn-key process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We here at IAAP understand that it is better to syndicate robustly than to matrix perfectly. Think real-world. Without sufficient niches, models are forced to become world-class. What does it really mean to expedite "strategically"? The convergence factor is sticky, fractal. We think we know that it is better to syndicate micro-transparently than to strategize strategically. We will maximize our capability to repurpose without lessening our capability to reinvent. What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will harness the capacity of infomediaries to integrate. Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! IAAP is the industry leader of ubiquitous technologies. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We will evolve the term "integrated". The capability to productize virally leads to the ability to embrace globally. Think scalable. Think impactful. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We realize that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to whiteboard holistically. What does the term "niches" really mean? Think short-term. Think six-sigma. Think compelling, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. If you aggregate vertically, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? IAAP practically invented the term "partnerships". We think we know that it is better to disintermediate proactively than to iterate magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade globally than to harness efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We have come to know that it is better to strategize virtually than to redefine ultra-intuitively. The compliance factor is resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for dealing with new intuitive cross-platform, affiliate-based paradigms? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the power of applications to visualize. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without sufficient super-power shifts, channels are forced to become real-time.