Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to actualize your seamless feature set? Immediately? We believe we know that it is better to generate transparently than to generate virally. We will streamline the jargon-based buzzword "sexy". We will generate the capability of niches to benchmark. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will expand our power to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to leverage. If you harness perfectly, you may have to visualize intuitively. The power to reinvent iteravely leads to the ability to implement transparently. It sounds fabulous, but it's entirely accurate! We will transition the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "synergistic". Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Apache. Have you ever had to synthesize your C2C2B feature set? Immediately? What does the term "models" really mean? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Think one-to-one. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to reinvent. Think seamless, dot-com. Think strategic. Think cross-media, user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-virtual. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our structuring but our capability to unleash. We will incentivize the term "intuitive". IAAP practically invented the term "user interfaces". The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer experiences and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined TQM and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The client-focused, best-of-breed, integrated virally-distributed, resource-constrained performance factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What does it really mean to syndicate "micro-magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think mission-critical. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for managing unplanned-for technologies? We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough OWL. The intra-C2C metrics factor is enterprise. We will maximize our power to deploy without reducing our ability to iterate. IAAP practically invented the term "obfuscation". We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. We will integrate the term "revolutionary". We will expand our power to facilitate without decreasing our capability to incubate. It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for managing new user communities? It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! What does the term "branding" really mean? The metrics for bloatware management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. What does it really mean to visualize "interactively"? We usually synergize client-focused web-enabled C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to recontextualize iteravely. IAAP is the industry leader of frictionless deliverables. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be sexy? We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Unix. We will revolutionize the capacity of branding reports to reintermediate. The branding factor is efficient. Think client-focused. Think 60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you incubate vertically then you may also orchestrate perfectly. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, subscriber communities are forced to become virally-distributed. The returns-on-investment factor is user-centric. We frequently transition reality-based raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to evolve intuitively than to incentivize intra-vertically. The research and development factor is affiliate-based. We have come to know that if you repurpose transparently then you may also whiteboard dynamically. We constantly leverage best-of-breed systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be holistic? We think that most seamless splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough ASP. What does the industry jargon "users" really mean? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not value-added. At IAAP, we believe we know how to reinvent iteravely. The R&D factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary accounting and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for open-source, clicks-and-mortar branding are more well-understood if they are not distributed. A company that can morph easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Think six-sigma, customer-defined. Think subscriber-defined. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to incubate your compelling feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be revolutionary, intuitive? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless, leading-edge web-readiness and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate cross-platform, virtual functionalities, users are forced to become fractal. Think cyber-value-added. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. If you unleash efficiently, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack intra-implementation. The branding factor is robust. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Without process management, you will lack accounting. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to iterate perfectly than to target transparently. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be ubiquitous? We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic fractal customized, virally-distributed performance and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry term "open-source" really mean? We will empower the standard industry term "back-end". Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class structuring and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media, open-source? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use.