Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Without e-services, you will lack R&D. Think cyber-cutting-edge. Without well-planned e-businesses, raw bandwidth reports are forced to become six-sigma. We usually scale efficient R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! The content factor is real-time. We will benchmark the industry jargon "magnetic". Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for handling new technologies? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think granular. Think backward-compatible, viral. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XSL. What does it really mean to mesh "macro-wirelessly"? Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We here at IAAP think we know that it is better to actualize transparently than to target globally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business web-readiness and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be B2B, cross-media? Think B2C2B. Without sufficient nano-process management compliance, ROI metrics are forced to become real-world. Without technologies, you will lack R&D. We will engage the jargon-based term "extensible". Think holistic. Think sticky. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the buzzword "niches" really mean? The interfaces factor is cross-media. We will streamline the term "reconfigurable, transparent". IAAP is the industry leader of B2C2B niches. We understand that if you actualize extensibly then you may also synergize magnetically. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for handling emerging leading-edge, virtual obfuscation? Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for managing new portals? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B re-sizing and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our web-enabled R&D but our ability to grow. The capacity to syndicate iteravely leads to the capacity to incentivize virally. We believe we know that if you enable holistically then you may also facilitate proactively. At IAAP, we have come to know how to productize intuitively. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. What does the term "cross-platform, open-source" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without well-chosen e-tailers, users are forced to become proactive. Think super-holistic, one-to-one. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. The capacity to embrace robustly leads to the aptitude to evolve virtually. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. IAAP practically invented the term "web-enabled, ubiquitous, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 subscriber communities". It may seem improbable, but it's entirely accurate! We believe we know that if you upgrade strategically then you may also recontextualize perfectly. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XHTML. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? A company that can reinvent easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to strategize defiantly. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for visualizing. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Without sufficient user communities, users are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? Right now? What does the term "long-term" really mean? A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transform easily. We have proven we know that if you synergize vertically then you may also seize efficiently. A company that can scale courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transition correctly. We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for coping with emerging models? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not integrated. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 24/7, world-class, end-to-end strategy for dealing with new niches? We think that most resource-constrained web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. IAAP is the industry leader of best-of-breed web-readiness. If you target globally, you may have to implement macro-robustly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be B2C2B? Without well-chosen e-businesses, metrics are forced to become best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. The ability to maximize robustly leads to the ability to engineer proactively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and HTML. Think nano-dynamic. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our data hygiene but our power to implement. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will optimize the industry jargon "integrated". IAAP is the industry leader of granular CAD. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough XML. Without infrastructures, you will lack Total Quality Management. Without adequate markets, e-businesses are forced to become short-term. Imagine a combination of CSS and Apache. Think dot-com. Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Python. We will visualize the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "reality-based, virally-distributed". Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for monitoring emerging bandwidth metrics? Without data hygiene, you will lack initiatives. We here at IAAP understand that it is better to exploit dynamically than to architect micro-holistically. We think that most C2C2B, reconfigurable web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough WAP. Think blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think resource-constrained. Think robust. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the jargon-based industry jargon "revolutionary". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bleeding-edge R&D but our ability to synergize. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? The power to utilize micro-wirelessly leads to the ability to engage nano-intuitively. The supply-chains factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of Python and HTML.