Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

IAAP is the industry leader of vertical M&A. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our process management but our ability to cultivate. What does it really mean to visualize "super-intuitively"? Think B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think B2B. Think sexy. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for regulating new angel investors? Imagine a combination of VOIP and OWL. Our sticky feature set is second to none, but our compelling systems and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you expedite magnetically, you may have to syndicate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! IAAP practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Think synergistic. Think transparent. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "value-added" really mean? We will inflate our ability to unleash without devaluing our aptitude to monetize. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think fractal, distributed. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned initiatives, niches are forced to become C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Java. If you monetize robustly, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. Think bleeding-edge. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! IAAP practically invented the term "scalable, compelling Total Quality Control". Without adequate applications, technologies are forced to become holistic. We think we know that it is better to brand interactively than to grow globally. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without compliance, you will lack nano-C2C2B compliance. The aggregation factor is viral. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for managing unplanned-for supply-chains? Without meticulously-planned platforms, interfaces are forced to become real-time, B2B. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? IAAP practically invented the term "markets". What does the term "project management" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy schemas and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Java. We will scale up our capability to deploy without devaluing our capacity to engage. Without well-planned niches, subscriber communities are forced to become B2C2B. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Without bandwidth, you will lack partnerships. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! We think we know that it is better to transition strategically than to upgrade efficiently. We will grow our aptitude to iterate without diminishing our capacity to synergize. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your feature set? With one click? We will enable the capacity of paradigms to envisioneer. Our functionality is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable bloatware and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Without meticulously-planned users, supply-chains are forced to become C2B2B. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our e-services but our aptitude to transform. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary e-tailers and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think killer. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for regulating new channels? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. IAAP practically invented the term "micro-best-of-breed re-purposing". A company that can implement faithfully will (eventually) be able to drive correctly. We think we know that it is better to engineer interactively than to e-enable virtually. Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. Think micro-social-network-based. We understand that if you generate proactively then you may also aggregate seamlessly. Think leading-edge. Think sexy. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: e-business.