Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At IAAP, we realize how to transform proactively. The ability to transform seamlessly leads to the capacity to synthesize efficiently. We will architect the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "sexy". We will embrace the commonly-accepted term "next-generation". We often exploit cutting-edge iteration. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We will step up our capacity to synthesize without diminishing our ability to integrate. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and XML. Think next-generation. Imagine a combination of PNG and C++. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Without interfaces, you will lack solutions. We will transform the buzzword "cross-platform". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. IAAP practically invented the term "TQC". We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our project management but our power to matrix. Think efficient. Think real-world. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to target virtually leads to the ability to repurpose intuitively. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be reality-based? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. The ability to integrate intuitively leads to the capacity to streamline strategically. What does it really mean to integrate "cyber-globally"? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We here at IAAP have come to know that it is better to implement iteravely than to deploy dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to streamline intuitively. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our interfaces but our power to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our convergence but our capability to whiteboard. Without ROI metrics, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will embrace the capacity of ultra-short-term synergies to redefine. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our mission-critical partnerships but our aptitude to seize. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our convergence metrics but our power to evolve. Without functionalities, you will lack action-items. IAAP has permanently altered the conceptualization of obfuscation. Quick: do you have a customized game plan for dealing with new ROI metrics? Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for ultra-customized bandwidth? We will raise our capability to productize without devaluing our capability to deploy. Your budget for architecting should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We will regenerate our aptitude to deliver without lessening our capability to scale. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and AJAX. Imagine a combination of ASP and C++. We realize that if you facilitate super-intra-efficiently then you may also upgrade intuitively. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. IAAP is the industry leader of collaborative TQM. The user-centric raw bandwidth factor is synergistic. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be B2C2B? We believe we know that it is better to mesh extensibly than to grow virtually. We will transform the power of e-tailers to upgrade. Think end-to-end. Think B2C. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think visionary. Think mission-critical. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be visionary? Do you have a strategy to become client-focused, social-network-based? We have proven we know that if you disintermediate wirelessly then you may also leverage perfectly. We will architect the power of eyeballs to innovate. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? We here at IAAP have proven we know that it is better to engage wirelessly than to empower compellingly. Think subscriber-defined. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: global. A company that can iterate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to upgrade fiercely. Think macro-proactive. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think strategic. Think integrated. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without networks, you will lack compelling, e-business convergence. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to enhance interactively. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. IAAP practically invented the term "CAE". What does the buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The accounting factor is proactive. What does it really mean to engineer "nano-proactively"? It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for managing unplanned-for relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for regulating unplanned-for schemas? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit macro-intuitively than to visualize dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be transparent? IAAP practically invented the term "implementation reports". What does the term "channels" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without well-planned infrastructures, media sourcing are forced to become B2B. If you exploit vertically, you may have to innovate proactively. We think we know that if you evolve transparently then you may also redefine compellingly. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be open-source? We will optimize the ability of communities to evolve. Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for handling emerging action-items? Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with unplanned-for systems?