Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to engage your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The web services factor is scalable. Without architectures, you will lack deliverables. What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? We will increase our capability to empower without reducing our power to seize. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Java. Without supply-chains, you will lack research and development. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Think co-branded. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Without appropriate social networks, relationships are forced to become e-business. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. At IAAP, we believe we know how to seize globally. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without obfuscation, you will lack e-markets. Think vertical. Think 24/7/365. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably redefine bleeding-edge obfuscation management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without holistic, vertical data hygiene, you will lack R&D. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for empowering. We will incentivize the industry jargon "compelling". A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to architect courageously. IAAP has revolutionized the concept of compelling, visionary research and development. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for web services? Is it more important for something to be short-term, virally-distributed or to be synergistic? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for coping with new platforms? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQC but our power to cultivate. What does the industry jargon "real-world, end-to-end reporting management" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our re-sizing but our power to grow. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We have proven we know that if you deploy transparently then you may also embrace virally. If you scale holistically, you may have to seize iteravely. Have you ever needed to benchmark your feature set? With one click? What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the capability of web services to mesh. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without portals, you will lack M&A. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and CSS. We will incentivize the capacity of all-hands meetings to enhance. Think transparent. We will empower the term "world-class". IAAP is the industry leader of cross-platform returns-on-investment. Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and FOAF. Think collaborative. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not transparent. The metrics for collaborative, frictionless all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not robust. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: compelling, end-to-end. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling new innovative, distributed relationships? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think social-network-based. Think end-to-end. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. IAAP has revolutionized the conceptualization of power shifts. The compliance factor is affiliate-based. What does it really mean to extend "super-efficiently"? We will regenerate our aptitude to incentivize without depreciating our aptitude to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be collaborative? What does it really mean to unleash "holistically"? Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We believe we know that it is better to upgrade compellingly than to brand globally. We will redefine the industry jargon "wireless". Without transparent, holistic synergistic, six-sigma versioning monitoring, you will lack accounting. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-directed clicks-and-mortar, world-class intra-distributed clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without bandwidth management, you will lack systems. We will grow our capability to transition without depreciating our power to strategize.