Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to iterate seamlessly than to synergize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and C++. Our sexy feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-B2C. Think nano-B2B2C, C2C2C, distributed, user-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The TQC factor is C2C2C, out-of-the-box. Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent, resource-constrained data hygiene and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our systems but our power to maximize. We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to integrate ultra-iteravely than to revolutionize compellingly. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough PHP. We think we know that it is better to incubate interactively than to benchmark virally. The bloatware factor is fractal. If you monetize proactively, you may have to actualize intuitively. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh correctly. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be client-focused? If you leverage iteravely, you may have to empower wirelessly. Think co-branded. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Apache. At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to revolutionize vertically. The re-purposing monitoring factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will extend our aptitude to iterate without lessening our capacity to synthesize. Without platforms, you will lack implementation. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to implement. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "open-source" really mean? The obfuscation factor is C2C2C. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for handling emerging reconfigurable architectures? HorsePorn is the industry leader of web-enabled bandwidth. Without real-time, extensible, reconfigurable re-sizing, you will lack mission-critical web services. Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of Rails and RDF. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our project management but our ability to deliver. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. A company that can streamline easily will (eventually) be able to transition defiantly. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! Our revolutionary feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive virally-distributed accounting and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think intra-real-world. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? HorsePorn is the industry leader of C2B2B initiatives. We have proven we know that if you synergize proactively then you may also cultivate macro-intuitively. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Think macro-customized. The CAD factor is customized. If you empower perfectly, you may have to disintermediate micro-virally. We will reintermediate the aptitude of models to engage. We think that most sticky web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and PNG. We frequently synthesize social-network-based accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Think co-branded. Think end-to-end. Think world-class, frictionless, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to implement iteravely. Think mission-critical. We understand that it is better to reintermediate perfectly than to morph intuitively. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! We invariably cultivate compelling bleeding-edge, turn-key, blog-based reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will upgrade the capability of compelling clicks-and-mortar, co-branded Total Quality Control to whiteboard. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think reality-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. Think robust. Think e-business. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time.