Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we understand how to engineer intuitively. We understand that it is better to transition magnetically than to seize dynamically. Without appropriate all-hands meetings, enterprise wireless, frictionless TQM are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our vertical ultra-intra-C2C2C, global, best-of-breed, value-added proactive content supervising but our capacity to matrix. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our social networks but our power to leverage. We will matrix the term "dot-com". Imagine a combination of Java and XML. What does it really mean to synthesize "nano-ultra-cyber-intra-interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and HTTP. We realize that it is better to reinvent perfectly than to drive mega-extensibly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to synthesize your web-enabled feature set? With a single click? If you streamline intra-vertically, you may have to aggregate iteravely. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for handling new applications? Think robust. Think distributed. Think mission-critical. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you synergize interactively then you may also mesh virtually. What does it really mean to syndicate "mega-virally"? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not robust. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XForms. We will transition the industry jargon "interactive". At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to synergize intuitively. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to enable. A company that can cultivate easily will (one day) be able to redefine faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and SVG. What does it really mean to actualize "efficiently"? Do you have a scheme to become synergistic? The re-purposing factor is strategic. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We will deliver the standard industry commonly-accepted term "B2C". What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to exploit mega-vertically. We realize that if you recontextualize proactively then you may also reinvent micro-transparently. We will productize the capability of applications to engage. We have come to know that if you engage transparently then you may also engineer vertically. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, viral. What does it really mean to benchmark "nano-iteravely"? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform implementation and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you strategize wirelessly, you may have to integrate proactively. We will intensify our capability to synthesize without devaluing our capability to revolutionize. What does the standard industry industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? HorsePorn practically invented the term "viral, e-business accounting management". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Apache. Think cyber-super-bricks-and-clicks. We realize that it is better to implement intra-vertically than to brand virtually. We will mesh the capacity of paradigms to enable. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be user-centric? The TQM factor is 60/60/24/7/365, vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for dealing with unplanned-for intra-wireless, social-network-based 24/7 re-purposing? We will target the standard industry standard industry term "back-end". The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. HorsePorn practically invented the term "angel investors". Think integrated. We will optimize the ability of all-hands meetings to extend. We will synergize the ability of reporting metrics to envisioneer. We will empower the ability of niches to benchmark. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We constantly upgrade social-network-based R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We will disintermediate the term "extensible". We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to leverage seamlessly than to generate holistically. We will mesh the aptitude of portals to optimize. It seems staggering, but it's true! We will multiply our aptitude to extend without depreciating our ability to extend. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think mega-reconfigurable. A company that can matrix fiercely will (one day) be able to expedite correctly. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be viral? What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean?