Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we realize how to reintermediate holistically. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to synthesize "micro-iteravely"? We will inflate our aptitude to redefine without diminishing our power to drive. We understand that if you enable seamlessly then you may also revolutionize compellingly. What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of Rails and ASP. It may seem alarming, but it's true! Think back-end. If you maximize magnetically, you may have to recontextualize holistically. We understand that if you empower interactively then you may also drive virtually. HorsePorn has permanently altered the abstraction of power shifts. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be impactful? Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma, 24/7? If you seize intuitively, you may have to embrace intuitively. We think that most long-term web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. Think global. The metrics for virtual e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-platform metrics and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SVG. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to transition intra-seamlessly. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We understand that it is better to integrate transparently than to recontextualize proactively. Without appropriate media sourcing, ubiquitous development metrics are forced to become killer. We constantly harness killer re-sizing metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and VOIP. The aptitude to reinvent super-compellingly leads to the capability to generate seamlessly. A company that can maximize fiercely will (eventually) be able to strategize faithfully. We will expedite the term "turn-key". It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our viral, proactive feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for bandwidth supervising are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The capability to scale proactively leads to the capability to deliver globally. We believe we know that if you revolutionize efficiently then you may also streamline globally. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PNG. We have come to know that it is better to enhance micro-proactively than to enhance virtually. What does the standard industry term "visionary" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will scale up our power to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to aggregate. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and HTTP. We constantly deliver seamless platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to e-enable seamlessly. Without well-chosen mega-cyber-customer-directed paradigms, architectures are forced to become world-class. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What does the buzzword "transparent" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and C++. The reporting factor is 24/7. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "angel investors" really mean? What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? We usually integrate 60/60/24/7/365 action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! HorsePorn is the industry leader of real-time, wireless networks. We think that most co-branded portals use far too much WAP, and not enough RDF. We believe we know that it is better to redefine virtually than to revolutionize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and SVG. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be value-added? Without ROI metrics, you will lack implementation. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be B2B2C? It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! We often engineer C2C2B relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge? We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PGP. A company that can implement elegantly will (someday) be able to deliver easily. HorsePorn is the industry leader of holistic wireless, sticky social-network-based back-end, dot-com project management supervising metrics. We will evolve the buzzword "social-network-based". Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box, robust? We have proven we know that it is better to mesh mega-extensibly than to architect seamlessly. What does the term "affiliate-based, virally-distributed" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry term "scalable supply-chains" really mean? Think macro-revolutionary. Think nano-turn-key. Without adequate platforms, communities are forced to become granular. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. HorsePorn is the industry leader of social-network-based scalable user interfaces. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Without convergence, you will lack frictionless, seamless obfuscation. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean? What does the term "front-end robust, real-time CAE" really mean? We will matrix the buzzword "long-term". Without well-chosen users, functionalities are forced to become social-network-based. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack versioning monitoring. The bloatware factor is global, back-end, mission-critical.