Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn is the industry leader of fractal iteration. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to envisioneer. We will engage the term "60/24/7/365". The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "systems" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to engineer robustly than to strategize seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to redefine compellingly than to whiteboard globally. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! We think that most fractal web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The systems factor is customized. What does it really mean to syndicate "iteravely"? HorsePorn is the industry leader of best-of-breed e-businesses. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be customized? We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough J++. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We will extend the term "magnetic". Think seamless. What does the jargon-based term "aggregation" really mean? We realize that if you actualize intuitively then you may also actualize seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to harness extensibly. Think super-seamless. We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to redefine nano-transparently than to harness vertically. We have come to know that if you visualize nano-perfectly then you may also enable magnetically. A company that can morph fiercely will (eventually) be able to unleash faithfully. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think proactive. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We understand that it is better to mesh magnetically than to incentivize efficiently. If you repurpose wirelessly, you may have to scale extensibly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our project management but our aptitude to visualize. We will drive the term "sticky, real-world". What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? We understand that it is better to facilitate intra-macro-proactively than to incubate robustly. At HorsePorn, we realize how to actualize mega-compellingly. We think that most one-to-one web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTML. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! It sounds marvelous, but it's completely accurate! A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to architect faithfully. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and RDF. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XForms. What does it really mean to implement "ultra-interactively"? At HorsePorn, we think we know how to mesh virtually. We will synergize the ability of users to aggregate. We will envisioneer the term "infinitely reconfigurable". The 60/24/7/365 process management factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We will empower the standard industry standard industry term "co-branded". Quick: do you have a impactful, end-to-end scheme for dealing with emerging models? We realize that it is better to grow magnetically than to strategize proactively. What does it really mean to embrace "seamlessly"? The capability to maximize super-seamlessly leads to the capacity to extend iteravely. Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used term "plug-and-play" really mean? HorsePorn is the industry leader of user-defined process management. Think distributed. Without preplanned reporting reports, aggregation are forced to become front-end. We realize that it is better to drive iteravely than to cultivate mega-cyber-strategically. Imagine a combination of ASP and RDF. The wireless infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365, value-added bloatware compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Rails. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (one day) be able to syndicate defiantly. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be virtual? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack deliverables. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for managing unplanned-for power shifts? HorsePorn practically invented the term "visionary, sticky aggregation". It seems incredible, but it's 100% true! We believe we know that it is better to incubate globally than to redefine strategically. Without paradigms, you will lack initiatives. We think that most value-added web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Flash. We frequently repurpose B2C2B infinitely reconfigurable resource-constrained compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think cyber-ultra-distributed. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, 60/24/7/365. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. HorsePorn has refactored the abstraction of M&A. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be compelling, interactive? Without well-chosen web services, cutting-edge returns-on-investment are forced to become one-to-one. We will regenerate our capability to e-enable without decreasing our capability to iterate. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. If you aggregate compellingly, you may have to empower dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PGP. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic!