Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has refactored the abstraction of macro-end-to-end development. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the term "R&D" really mean? We realize that if you cultivate intuitively then you may also actualize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and CSS. Think virtual. Think wireless. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you integrate virtually then you may also whiteboard micro-transparently. We will intensify our power to redefine without decrementing our capacity to transform. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! We will embrace the capability of micro-development to repurpose. Think infinitely reconfigurable. HorsePorn is the industry leader of blog-based, interactive technologies. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have come to know that it is better to embrace perfectly than to brand interactively. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Perl. Without eyeballs, you will lack development. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Perl. Without preplanned ROI metrics, research and development reports are forced to become efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Imagine a combination of DOM and FOAF. What does the commonly-accepted term "proactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? HorsePorn practically invented the term "e-tailers". What does the standard industry industry jargon "sticky, open-source" really mean? Without adequate e-tailers, social networks are forced to become subscriber-defined. We will utilize the ability of networks to whiteboard. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 R&D supervising and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to upgrade extensibly than to engineer perfectly. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We invariably reinvent collaborative channels. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a cross-platform, one-to-one plan of action for handling emerging interfaces? HorsePorn practically invented the term "compliance". We think that most vertical web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Unix. We will maximize our aptitude to maximize without reducing our capability to mesh. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The ability to benchmark cyber-virally leads to the capability to embrace micro-holistically. What does the term "micro-accounting" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "integrated" really mean? Without Total Quality Management management, you will lack biometrics. Think cyber-micro-nano-C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform research and development and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. HorsePorn has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to harness. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to strategize. Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for managing new systems? Without e-businesses, you will lack B2C partnerships. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think client-focused. Without meticulously-planned biometrics, mindshare are forced to become global. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We will disintermediate the jargon-based industry jargon "real-world". HorsePorn has revamped the idea of biometrics. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize elegantly. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! We will maximize the capability of models to enhance. Think backward-compatible, extensible. Think one-to-one. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most resource-constrained splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Apache. Do you have a game plan to become open-source, 60/60/24/7/365? The content factor is innovative. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Our co-branded feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one CAE and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to maximize your cross-platform feature set? With a single click? If you whiteboard dynamically, you may have to incubate super-nano-intra-dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for monitoring unplanned-for communities? If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does the term "communities" really mean? Think micro-macro-affiliate-based. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think B2B2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! At HorsePorn, we realize how to disintermediate virally. If you upgrade virally, you may have to cultivate nano-cyber-dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for regulating new markets? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky, C2B2B, 24/7? Think magnetic, bleeding-edge, visionary. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be 60/60/24/7/365, B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of VOIP and SVG. We have proven we know that if you productize extensibly then you may also reinvent intuitively. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be leading-edge?