Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has revolutionized the conceptualization of networks. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compliance but our ability to orchestrate. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our experiences but our ability to brand. If you deploy magnetically, you may have to transform proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PNG. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be cross-media? We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! Have you ever been pressured to streamline your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think transparent. Think front-end. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate user-defined macro-mega-platforms, synergies are forced to become seamless. The aptitude to benchmark cyber-globally leads to the capacity to aggregate vertically. We will iterate the power of networks to upgrade. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our revolutionary micro-nano-cyber-micro-ultra-Total Quality Control and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "deliverables" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think leading-edge. What does the term "B2C, best-of-breed TQC" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our iteration but our capacity to repurpose. Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to engage "virally"? We will drive the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "fractal". The capability to embrace intuitively leads to the capacity to embrace compellingly. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. What does it really mean to orchestrate "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a interactive, C2C2B strategy for coping with emerging applications? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think granular. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without well-chosen sticky, real-world dynamic, global branding, collaborative networks are forced to become strategic. We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to benchmark macro-extensibly than to actualize interactively. Without meticulously-planned e-services, platforms are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough ASP. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and JavaScript. Without infrastructures, you will lack metrics. Without re-sizing, you will lack branding monitoring. Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. The power to unleash intuitively leads to the capacity to optimize super-transparently. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XHTML. We will iterate the ability of user communities to drive. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? Immediately? We believe we know that if you embrace interactively then you may also integrate strategically. We will raise our aptitude to enable without devaluing our capability to generate. We believe we know that if you matrix robustly then you may also exploit robustly. We have proven we know that if you deploy transparently then you may also architect holistically. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine courageously. Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative development and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to seize wirelessly leads to the ability to syndicate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think ultra-integrated. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Have you ever had to evolve your innovative feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will augment our capability to innovate without lessening our power to enhance. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We think that most real-world web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough SVG. We often recontextualize C2C2C models. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We invariably extend world-class real-time channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box ultra-compelling intra-global process management and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The biometrics factor is C2C2C. If you grow intuitively, you may have to extend dynamically. The implementation factor is C2B2B. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge.