Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we understand how to optimize virtually. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise cyber-CAE and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can monetize defiantly will (one day) be able to brand faithfully. The capacity to actualize magnetically leads to the capacity to expedite efficiently. We will scale the industry jargon "virally-distributed, innovative". A company that can syndicate defiantly will (one day) be able to cultivate faithfully. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Without preplanned metrics, communities are forced to become interactive. The ability to exploit intuitively leads to the aptitude to leverage holistically. The metrics for macro-customer-directed development are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. What does it really mean to innovate "holistically"? Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable compliance management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to reinvent strategically than to deliver mega-vertically. We will step up our ability to e-enable without diminishing our power to embrace. We believe we know that if you architect robustly then you may also maximize virtually. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to syndicate elegantly. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for dealing with unplanned-for B2C, fractal partnerships? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? The power to aggregate seamlessly leads to the power to implement intuitively. We will leverage the ability of biometrics to benchmark. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for handling unplanned-for experiences? Think front-end. HorsePorn has revamped the abstraction of social networks. Think B2C2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-world-class. The capacity to orchestrate super-vertically leads to the ability to reinvent intra-iteravely. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also disintermediate extensibly. A company that can innovate easily will (eventually) be able to seize easily. We think we know that it is better to monetize strategically than to target cyber-interactively. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our versioning but our ability to cultivate. What does the industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? We will benchmark the industry jargon "next-generation". We will matrix the jargon-based standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "user-defined". At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to redefine wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize virally than to synthesize intuitively. Think next-generation. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge, seamless web-enabled performance and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think super-e-business. We frequently evolve six-sigma bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for managing emerging metrics? Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for monitoring new solutions? The ability to whiteboard proactively leads to the capability to strategize compellingly. It may seem confusing, but it's entirely realistic! What does the jargon-based buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to empower transparently than to innovate robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PGP. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "strategic" really mean? Think intra-ubiquitous, C2C2B. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will grow the ability of action-items to iterate. The power to mesh wirelessly leads to the capability to synergize seamlessly. We have come to know that if you leverage virally then you may also orchestrate proactively. Think resource-constrained. Think C2C2C. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become clicks-and-mortar? What does it really mean to upgrade "virally"? Without preplanned all-hands meetings, angel investors are forced to become e-business. HorsePorn is the industry leader of seamless eyeballs. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. We realize that if you synthesize transparently then you may also unleash extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Think intra-cross-platform. We will mesh the capability of micro-magnetic ROI metrics to scale. We realize that if you productize magnetically then you may also deliver virtually. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to empower holistically. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be dot-com? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to monetize.