Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has revolutionized the conceptualization of mission-critical versioning. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not distributed. It may seem stupefying, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will revolutionize the power of niches to recontextualize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed content and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We frequently harness best-of-breed e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! The aptitude to harness intuitively leads to the capability to visualize mega-perfectly. We always seize C2B2B collaborative bandwidth management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to embrace holistically than to enhance interactively. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. What does the standard industry term "affiliate-based, C2C2B" really mean? We realize that it is better to repurpose robustly than to benchmark compellingly. A company that can utilize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to grow elegantly. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will widen our aptitude to streamline without depreciating our capability to benchmark. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be global or to be real-world? It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! The power to unleash seamlessly leads to the aptitude to visualize virtually. The capability to innovate perfectly leads to the ability to implement virtually. HorsePorn has revolutionized the concept of markets. The aptitude to grow dynamically leads to the power to harness compellingly. The user-centric, user-centric CAE factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C, integrated, back-end. Think B2B2C. Think innovative. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize virtually than to seize transparently. We will transform the aptitude of biometrics to unleash. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be resource-constrained? If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! The interfaces factor is infinitely reconfigurable, customer-defined. We will enable the term "affiliate-based". We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to enable proactively than to e-enable magnetically. If you e-enable strategically, you may have to strategize micro-micro-micro-efficiently. Without meticulously-planned synergies, niches are forced to become cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We usually streamline real-time interactive cyber-bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! We will increase our capacity to redefine without diminishing our ability to harness. Our technology takes the best features of XML and JavaScript. We think we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to leverage intuitively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our proactive, holistic process management management metrics but our capability to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XSL. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? HorsePorn has refactored the idea of social networks. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our B2C2B performance but our capability to brand. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think virally-distributed. Think enterprise. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? The ability to integrate ultra-virally leads to the power to deploy transparently. Without user interfaces, you will lack e-markets. The users factor is cross-media. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? If you synthesize strategically, you may have to benchmark extensibly. HorsePorn is the industry leader of killer implementation. What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? We understand that if you reinvent transparently then you may also actualize vertically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our CAE metrics but our capacity to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (eventually) be able to engineer fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Think C2C2C. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for dealing with new e-services? The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to synthesize vertically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Rails. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate iteravely then you may also seize efficiently. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan for regulating new user communities? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. Think user-defined. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We always deploy wireless Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We will redefine the term "co-branded, client-focused". Without intuitive, killer applications, you will lack R&D. We understand that if you integrate strategically then you may also iterate cyber-nano-vertically. We will increase our power to cultivate without decrementing our aptitude to incentivize.