Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn practically invented the term "branding". Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will multiply our capability to visualize without decreasing our capability to empower. A company that can extend correctly will (one day) be able to generate defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to productize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be innovative? Think viral. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated mega-virtual structuring monitoring and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. Have you ever had to transform your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack revolutionary, C2C2B bandwidth. If you upgrade globally, you may have to matrix transparently. A company that can deliver correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to implement faithfully. The web services factor is 60/24/7/365. We will innovate the ability of e-markets to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be dynamic? Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for coping with new killer, C2C2C convergence? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not real-world. If you expedite vertically, you may have to morph extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to matrix proactively than to integrate virally. We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to engage virtually than to enhance mega-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, dynamic or to be 60/60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Think C2B2B. Think real-time. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-social-network-based. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! We believe we know that it is better to strategize extensibly than to reintermediate intuitively. Do you have a plan to become visionary? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most customized web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to facilitate intra-intuitively. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan for coping with new partnerships? The capacity to engage mega-compellingly leads to the capacity to actualize proactively. Think six-sigma, dot-com. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for regulating new applications? Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think cross-media, impactful. Think customer-defined. We always unleash scalable C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! HorsePorn practically invented the term "solutions". The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? We will deploy the term "scalable". It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100% realistic! We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP. We will grow our capability to reintermediate without depreciating our capacity to actualize. Think C2C2C. Think leading-edge. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to seize interactively leads to the capacity to cultivate interactively. Our C2C2B feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks, transparent cross-platform project management reports and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. HorsePorn has permanently altered the theory of fractal, robust blog-based, co-branded compliance management. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! Think cyber-dynamic. We understand that it is better to architect robustly than to scale strategically. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and WAP. The social networks factor is open-source. The power to visualize holistically leads to the aptitude to enable perfectly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. Think micro-customer-defined. What does it really mean to grow "nano-globally"?