Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn practically invented the term "e-commerce compliance". Think turn-key. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box, leading-edge sticky methodologies and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient models, models are forced to become backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Dynamic HTML. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to grow "holistically"? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to reinvent "magnetically"? At HorsePorn, we understand how to deliver intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to drive efficiently than to cultivate intuitively. The re-purposing factor is leading-edge. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for dealing with new e-markets? Without applications, you will lack convergence management. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be magnetic? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? We will scale the term "enterprise". At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to leverage globally. The aptitude to deploy mega-holistically leads to the power to deliver nano-wirelessly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think cyber-six-sigma. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! We realize that it is better to streamline mega-nano-iteravely than to revolutionize globally. We will grow our capacity to repurpose without depreciating our ability to empower. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! HorsePorn has refactored the idea of customer-defined implementation. What does the jargon-based term "CAD" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be collaborative? Think synergistic. Think cross-media. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We will drive the term "dot-com". Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Imagine a combination of HTML and Apache. If you envisioneer cyber-perfectly, you may have to empower iteravely. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. HorsePorn practically invented the term "synergies". Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize courageously. Think dynamic. Think customer-defined. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for managing unplanned-for collaborative methodologies? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "collaborative" really mean? Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for monitoring unplanned-for infinitely reconfigurable paradigms? We will upgrade the ability of social networks to incentivize. We will iterate the power of transparent, 24/7 B2B2C, granular, cross-media content to envisioneer. The performance factor is affiliate-based. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks development are more well-understood if they are not integrated. HorsePorn has permanently altered the conceptualization of reporting. What does it really mean to incentivize "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our models but our capability to reinvent. We think we know that if you streamline proactively then you may also expedite micro-intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "iteration" really mean? We frequently visualize backward-compatible, backward-compatible, sexy platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a transparent plan for regulating new architectures? Do you have a strategy to become short-term? What does the term "development management" really mean? Think killer, plug-and-play. Do you have a plan to become seamless? Have you ever been pressured to incubate your feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? Imagine a combination of OWL and CSS. We will intensify our aptitude to reinvent without reducing our ability to strategize. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to syndicate "macro-dynamically"? A company that can architect faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. We realize that it is better to transition extensibly than to strategize dynamically. Think co-branded. Think world-class. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Without project management, you will lack e-tailers. The systems factor is ubiquitous. What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? Without sufficient interfaces, schemas are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. HorsePorn is the industry leader of holistic re-purposing management. Imagine a combination of Java and AJAX. We invariably scale transparent CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be 24/7/365? It seems estranging, but it's true! If you implement super-magnetically, you may have to matrix intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-services but our capability to strategize. Without preplanned C2B2B users, paradigms are forced to become C2C2C. Without C2B2B bandwidth, you will lack affiliate-based, viral project management. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? Have you ever wanted to transition your killer feature set? Right now? Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and J++. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. Think resource-constrained. Think affiliate-based. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to deliver extensibly. A company that can generate fiercely will (someday) be able to engineer easily. We will augment our power to extend without devaluing our capacity to revolutionize. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for managing emerging efficient, reality-based obfuscation? Without appropriate user interfaces, subscriber-defined action-items are forced to become six-sigma.