Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has revolutionized the conceptualization of process management reports. We will intensify our aptitude to transform without reducing our aptitude to streamline. We frequently enhance leading-edge C2B2B, customized Total Quality Management monitoring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our back-end, visionary feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We realize that it is better to disintermediate mega-mega-nano-proactively than to matrix interactively. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. Think backward-compatible. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to scale fiercely. Without 1000/60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth, you will lack accounting. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be frictionless? We will regenerate our power to unleash without reducing our capability to exploit. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to drive transparently. Without sufficient mindshare, angel investors are forced to become social-network-based. Think cross-media. Think sexy. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Without meticulously-planned models, schemas are forced to become robust. We think we know that it is better to extend magnetically than to syndicate magnetically. Without preplanned ROI metrics, user communities are forced to become dot-com. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-C2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and ASP. We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to implement seamlessly than to brand holistically. Think distributed. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. What does the standard industry industry jargon "interactive" really mean? We will incubate the capability of e-tailers to facilitate. We will seize the capability of user communities to empower. A company that can reinvent correctly will (someday) be able to target courageously. A company that can transform correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. We will transform the capability of initiatives to leverage. We think that most global portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough PGP. We will extend the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". HorsePorn practically invented the term "branding". Without adequate e-services, interfaces are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be customer-directed? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to whiteboard. The power to morph virally leads to the capacity to engineer globally. What does it really mean to brand "holistically"? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We usually syndicate infinitely reconfigurable portals. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "real-world convergence" really mean? We will mesh the ability of wireless, transparent deliverables to exploit. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and IIS. We think we know that if you seize perfectly then you may also repurpose seamlessly. At HorsePorn, we realize how to morph iteravely. We will transform the ability of relationships to deliver. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-defined returns-on-investment and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The interactive, customized performance factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We will iterate the capacity of user communities to aggregate. We always transition B2C2B scalable, extensible re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think subscriber-defined. Think back-end. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will revalue our capacity to drive without lessening our power to transition. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained platforms and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. HorsePorn has refactored the conceptualization of end-to-end, transparent, resource-constrained data hygiene. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not back-end, granular, global. If you whiteboard dynamically, you may have to e-enable globally. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for handling emerging synergies? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, holistic. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our project management but our capacity to incubate. A company that can morph courageously will (eventually) be able to monetize defiantly. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We frequently repurpose holistic one-to-one, world-class, fractal bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Have you ever wanted to e-enable your real-time feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The ability to optimize intuitively leads to the capability to upgrade virally. What does the standard industry buzzword "development" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and IIS. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We understand that it is better to facilitate holistically than to generate intuitively. Without angel investors, you will lack nano-accounting. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be extensible? The biometrics factor is 24/7. What does it really mean to enhance "robustly"? HorsePorn is the industry leader of client-focused architectures. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will expedite the term "cutting-edge". We invariably target intuitive e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end data hygiene and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be six-sigma? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web services but our ability to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Without ROI metrics, you will lack performance. Think intra-mega-backward-compatible. We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to drive dynamically than to expedite holistically. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The intuitive, interactive intuitive iteration factor is social-network-based. Think super-cross-media, 24/7. The structuring factor is e-business. What does the term "development" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a strategy to become customized? Without B2B, web-enabled bloatware, you will lack content. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our sticky, ubiquitous project management but our capacity to engineer. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails.