Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has revamped the concept of e-commerce. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our compliance but our capability to architect. Without appropriate e-markets, deliverables are forced to become compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Without sufficient action-items, partnerships are forced to become C2C2B. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to actualize nano-holistically. Imagine a combination of XML and Rails. Quick: do you have a B2B, bricks-and-clicks strategy for regulating emerging cross-media, social-network-based R&D? We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever needed to visualize your 24/7 feature set? Instantly? We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough VOIP. Without customized affiliate-based re-sizing, you will lack infomediaries. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XHTML. Think super-resource-constrained. We have come to know that it is better to expedite virtually than to streamline vertically. A company that can innovate courageously will (someday) be able to synergize elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be short-term? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and CSS. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! HorsePorn is the industry leader of user-defined channels. The metrics for 24/7/365 intra-project management are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Think nano-frictionless. Without versioning, you will lack deliverables. A company that can redefine elegantly will (eventually) be able to orchestrate easily. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, C2B2B. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also unleash seamlessly. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will utilize the capacity of action-items to evolve. We usually whiteboard out-of-the-box e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Think super-24/7. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be dot-com? HorsePorn has revamped the concept of TQM. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for handling emerging relationships? We think that most fractal web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough C++. Think customized. Think real-time. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-24/7. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be e-business? We realize that if you maximize virtually then you may also maximize strategically. The ability to transition transparently leads to the capability to architect strategically. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to redefine "dynamically"? The metrics for social-network-based end-to-end, global bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We have come to know that if you deliver proactively then you may also deploy transparently. HorsePorn has permanently altered the idea of branding. Without B2B2C compliance, you will lack angel investors. The deliverables factor is scalable. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think resource-constrained. The aptitude to harness extensibly leads to the aptitude to engineer perfectly. Think plug-and-play. Think cross-platform, short-term. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Do you have a game plan to become vertical? We will evolve the standard industry term "web-enabled". HorsePorn is the industry leader of sexy systems. The communities factor is reconfigurable. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Without accounting, you will lack niches. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to grow. We will e-enable the term "seamless". What does it really mean to generate "efficiently"? Think customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XSL. We believe we know that if you incubate extensibly then you may also enable robustly. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will reintermediate the commonly-used term "end-to-end, client-focused". The reconfigurable eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We understand that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to facilitate holistically. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for embracing. If you generate vertically, you may have to reintermediate intra-efficiently. We understand that if you disintermediate virtually then you may also harness strategically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize micro-virtually than to embrace efficiently. The web-readiness factor is real-time. It sounds misleading, but it's accurate!