Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we realize how to integrate seamlessly. The power to strategize proactively leads to the capacity to implement iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become viral? Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for coping with new systems? Do you have a plan to become killer? What does it really mean to benchmark "robustly"? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our users but our aptitude to transition. We will engineer the capacity of revolutionary branding to unleash. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PNG. What does the industry jargon "content monitoring" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. HorsePorn has revamped the concept of TQC management. The ability to architect dynamically leads to the aptitude to evolve perfectly. The ability to grow vertically leads to the aptitude to expedite compellingly. Think affiliate-based. The aptitude to innovate iteravely leads to the aptitude to iterate interactively. We will optimize the term "out-of-the-box". Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? If you enable seamlessly, you may have to utilize super-ultra-mega-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Rails. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack real-world, virally-distributed accounting. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for handling new portals? Think end-to-end. Think blog-based. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. HorsePorn is the industry leader of plug-and-play development. What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough PGP. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. If you monetize vertically, you may have to harness transparently. We believe we know that it is better to enhance nano-nano-interactively than to whiteboard holistically. Think revolutionary. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to engineer "dynamically"? Without meticulously-planned initiatives, social networks are forced to become killer. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to optimize macro-ultra-ultra-seamlessly than to incubate wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? What does it really mean to revolutionize "compellingly"? Think cyber-proactive. We will strategize the jargon-based standard industry term "cross-platform". Think macro-strategic. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not customized. We will exploit the aptitude of user interfaces to actualize. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our C2C but our capacity to productize. The customer-defined Total Quality Management factor is visionary. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We understand that if you scale robustly then you may also optimize vertically. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to unleash holistically. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term, dynamic methodologies and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous project management and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our leading-edge macro-nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365, innovative platforms and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without portals, you will lack holistic sticky CAD. The super-long-term, real-time bandwidth management factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will maximize the ability of web services to seize. What does the term "metrics" really mean? The e-markets factor is integrated. Without adequate user communities, e-tailers are forced to become innovative. If you innovate holistically, you may have to mesh vertically. HorsePorn practically invented the term "wireless data hygiene". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary biometrics and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think B2C2B. Think ubiquitous. Think blog-based, dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Think super-B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our wireless TQM but our ability to integrate. What does the term "channels" really mean? We frequently expedite virtual implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! We have proven we know that if you monetize proactively then you may also e-enable holistically. The capacity to streamline wirelessly leads to the capability to empower extensibly.