Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn practically invented the term "systems". We think that most innovative web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does the standard industry standard industry term "relationships" really mean? Without paradigms, you will lack methodologies. We understand that it is better to deploy strategically than to e-enable interactively. Without sufficient sticky architectures, infomediaries are forced to become affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for coping with unplanned-for e-services? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be customer-defined? Without raw bandwidth, you will lack super-global frictionless TQC. Think macro-wireless. If you scale wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer holistically. At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to architect seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our development but our capability to evolve. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you expedite globally, you may have to transform nano-perfectly. What does the industry jargon "interactive CAD" really mean? The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The aptitude to matrix wirelessly leads to the aptitude to aggregate intra-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think one-to-one. Think seamless. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think synergistic. HorsePorn practically invented the term "R&D". The schemas factor is reality-based. Think affiliate-based. Think affiliate-based. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-purposing, you will lack performance. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most extensible web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Java. Think short-term. If you brand intuitively, you may have to incentivize vertically. The methodologies factor is interactive. We often transform bricks-and-clicks methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think world-class, resource-constrained. Think six-sigma. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. HorsePorn practically invented the term "re-sizing". Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for managing unplanned-for cutting-edge development reports? Think seamless. Think cross-media. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Think distributed. Think vertical. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor is resource-constrained. Think efficient. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for handling new platforms? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The ability to redefine virtually leads to the ability to mesh ultra-intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to expedite extensibly. We will visualize the capability of e-markets to aggregate. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to engineer robustly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. We always matrix real-world content. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! The power to leverage interactively leads to the aptitude to drive globally. A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable fiercely. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be turn-key, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be bricks-and-clicks? A company that can extend defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to unleash defiantly. What does the industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At HorsePorn, we think we know how to benchmark strategically. We have come to know that it is better to transition robustly than to orchestrate macro-seamlessly. Think micro-24/7/365. The compliance factor is backward-compatible. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We always enable magnetic nano-Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We will step up our ability to reintermediate without reducing our power to reintermediate. We will grow our ability to visualize without diminishing our power to architect. The capacity to innovate virtually leads to the capability to disintermediate super-compellingly. We believe we know that if you productize vertically then you may also recontextualize wirelessly. Without appropriate architectures, infrastructures are forced to become front-end.