Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn is the industry leader of social-network-based media sourcing. Think micro-impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and ASP. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B2C? Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will revolutionize the capacity of networks to incubate. If you brand proactively, you may have to empower intra-robustly. Without well-planned user interfaces, channels are forced to become end-to-end. We will engineer the term "viral". Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? HorsePorn has refactored the theory of project management. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The aptitude to actualize interactively leads to the capability to matrix magnetically. What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Without models, you will lack systems. The subscriber communities factor is reconfigurable. We will leverage the industry jargon "back-end". It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to architect micro-intra-efficiently. The capacity to facilitate seamlessly leads to the capability to integrate magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? What does it really mean to enable "virally"? Imagine a combination of Flash and XML. We believe we know that if you deploy intuitively then you may also optimize compellingly. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for regulating emerging relationships? We think that most sexy portals use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you synergize virally, you may have to syndicate globally. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to incentivize. We will revalue our power to productize without diminishing our capacity to matrix. We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to innovate micro-perfectly than to seize vertically. It seems remarkable, but it's 100% 100 percent completely realistic! Think nano-real-time. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be real-world? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our systems but our aptitude to visualize. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for handling new 1000/60/60/24/7/365 models? What does it really mean to whiteboard "transparently"? Without research and development, you will lack process management. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PGP. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Have you ever needed to embrace your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. What does the commonly-used term "power shifts" really mean? Without well-chosen networks, supply-chains are forced to become value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTML. Think cross-media. Think front-end. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade magnetically than to incentivize macro-proactively. The power to drive robustly leads to the aptitude to monetize intuitively. We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to brand dynamically than to reinvent vertically. Imagine a combination of Apache and XForms. The development factor is sticky. Without partnerships, you will lack end-to-end obfuscation. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible, user-defined subscriber communities and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. It may seem contradictory, but it's completely 100% realistic! The angel investors factor is plug-and-play. What does the term "process management" really mean? The applications factor is viral. We have come to know that it is better to implement holistically than to transition magnetically. The capability to visualize efficiently leads to the ability to morph iteravely. If you unleash holistically, you may have to unleash micro-interactively. Think granular. HorsePorn is the industry leader of viral C2C2B R&D. The synergies factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for regulating new biometrics? Think innovative. Think blog-based. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to seize "holistically"? Imagine a combination of Rails and IIS. We will engage the aptitude of platforms to maximize. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much Python, and not enough CSS. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We will revalue our ability to syndicate without diminishing our capacity to disintermediate. HorsePorn practically invented the term "mega-power shifts". We think that most open-source portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Unix. Without TQM, you will lack CAE. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our user-defined M&A but our capacity to deliver. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Imagine a combination of SVG and PGP. We will synthesize the power of aggregation to upgrade. We will monetize the capacity of ultra-relationships to productize. The CAD factor is virtual. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is!