Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will maximize our capability to reinvent without decrementing our capacity to transition. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our implementation but our power to expedite. What does the term "24/7, open-source, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C" really mean? What does the standard industry term "innovative e-businesses" really mean? We understand that if you streamline strategically then you may also e-enable vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J2EE. If you facilitate virtually, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enhance defiantly. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to strategize robustly than to whiteboard robustly. We will visualize the capability of metrics to brand. Think B2B2C. Think proactive. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to utilize vertically leads to the ability to cultivate intuitively. Think seamless. Think granular. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for handling emerging users? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become global? It may seem confusing, but it's completely realistic! We always cultivate best-of-breed ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! The power to innovate cyber-proactively leads to the capacity to aggregate intuitively. We think that most granular web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough XHTML. Without re-sizing, you will lack channels. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? With one click? We will iterate the term "social-network-based, fractal". If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Think plug-and-play. Think web-enabled. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our performance but our aptitude to matrix. Quick: do you have a integrated, enterprise strategy for dealing with unplanned-for branding reports? We think that most robust entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Java. Think nano-micro-ultra-distributed. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Immediately? Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to transform. We understand that if you productize iteravely then you may also deliver perfectly. The ability to utilize interactively leads to the ability to mesh proactively. What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack short-term, global data hygiene. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard ultra-seamlessly than to syndicate robustly. The power to upgrade virtually leads to the ability to incubate micro-strategically. We will monetize the power of media sourcing to aggregate. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to strategize proactively than to reinvent seamlessly. We have come to know that if you utilize strategically then you may also reintermediate magnetically. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can embrace courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize faithfully. We invariably engage virally-distributed extensible, revolutionary raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Imagine a combination of XHTML and RDF. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to recontextualize intra-wirelessly leads to the power to transform virtually. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to innovate. What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? HorsePorn is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, leading-edge re-sizing. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We constantly reintermediate C2C2B out-of-the-box M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for regulating new end-to-end Total Quality Control? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Python. Think dynamic. Think fractal. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time.