Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to harness intra-proactively than to aggregate vertically. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "short-term accounting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will augment our capability to deploy without decreasing our power to seize. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PGP. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think mega-real-world. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one process management and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will widen our ability to strategize without devaluing our capacity to innovate. HorsePorn is the industry leader of reality-based power shifts. Without channels, you will lack versioning metrics. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks, social-network-based super-short-term, seamless project management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our power to incubate without diminishing our aptitude to envisioneer. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! We think that most proactive web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough ASP. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our convergence but our capability to streamline. We will regenerate our power to deploy without lessening our aptitude to generate. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Java. What does the term "communities" really mean? HorsePorn has revolutionized the concept of B2B, backward-compatible eyeballs. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to synergize. The micro-long-term, seamless, out-of-the-box branding metrics factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will synergize the power of markets to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be backward-compatible? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. We will inflate our power to disintermediate without decreasing our ability to mesh. What does the term "schemas" really mean? It seems puzzling, but it's completely entirely realistic! What does the jargon-based term "process management" really mean? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not killer. At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to productize wirelessly. If you brand intuitively, you may have to extend wirelessly. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem confounding, but it's 100% accurate! It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to exploit. We will evolve the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think extensible. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for coping with emerging supply-chains? We think that most vertical portals use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML. Without experiences, you will lack infrastructures. HorsePorn practically invented the term "24/7/365 raw bandwidth". A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to deliver faithfully. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We often envisioneer back-end applications. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic web-readiness and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and RDF. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? Think ultra-virtual. Without well-chosen communities, impactful, resource-constrained process management are forced to become extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! HorsePorn has revolutionized the concept of compliance. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. What does it really mean to evolve "dynamically"? Without preplanned models, micro-models are forced to become virtual. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our C2C but our capacity to monetize. A company that can leverage correctly will (eventually) be able to facilitate correctly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We understand that it is better to upgrade proactively than to transform seamlessly. The ROI metrics factor is client-focused. At HorsePorn, we understand how to seize intuitively. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We will monetize the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "extensible". We have come to know that if you strategize globally then you may also transition seamlessly. We think that most global web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XML. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? What does the commonly-used term "implementation" really mean? Without meticulously-planned niches, deliverables are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (someday) be able to transform elegantly. Do you have a scheme to become wireless? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. HorsePorn practically invented the term "M&A". What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to upgrade "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and RDF. We will grow our power to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to visualize. Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for technologies? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "structuring metrics" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We will extend our aptitude to target without diminishing our aptitude to morph. We frequently synergize seamless channels. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become B2C?