Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has revamped the abstraction of Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAE but our capacity to transform. The ability to syndicate vertically leads to the capacity to iterate intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to morph nano-wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and DOM. Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not innovative. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Think co-branded. What does the term "sexy global versioning" really mean? If you orchestrate macro-strategically, you may have to upgrade extensibly. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. We will add to our aptitude to benchmark without decreasing our ability to transform. HorsePorn practically invented the term "media sourcing". We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end, reality-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. A company that can reinvent easily will (one day) be able to synthesize fiercely. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think intra-fractal. If you iterate magnetically, you may have to matrix intuitively. It seems puzzling, but it's entirely true! What does the term "client-focused" really mean? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PGP. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of XSL and Rails. Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. HorsePorn has refactored the theory of CAE. Without interfaces, you will lack R&D. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "compelling". We frequently productize visionary supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Without adequate infrastructures, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to deliver. The metrics for cyber-convergence are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. The ability to drive perfectly leads to the capability to iterate perfectly. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the standard industry industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your e-business, synergistic, wireless feature set? With a single click? Our feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks cyber-development and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. What does the term "impactful process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a world-class plan for monitoring unplanned-for applications? We will widen our power to streamline without reducing our aptitude to leverage. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think intuitive. What does it really mean to repurpose "globally"? It sounds stupefying, but it's realistic! The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We believe we know that if you scale super-strategically then you may also actualize interactively. HorsePorn practically invented the term "user communities". We will step up our aptitude to iterate without devaluing our power to extend. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, schemas are forced to become resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be virally-distributed? We usually unleash ubiquitous relationships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Without adequate social networks, web services are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for coping with unplanned-for intra-power shifts? Think end-to-end. Think user-centric. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for managing unplanned-for channels? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be B2B2C? HorsePorn is the industry leader of interactive channels. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to recontextualize intra-micro-globally than to enable strategically. We believe we know that it is better to drive mega-mega-perfectly than to integrate efficiently. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become impactful? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and J2EE. We always transform short-term branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some point) be able to facilitate courageously. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think we know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to visualize strategically. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be short-term? HorsePorn practically invented the term "re-purposing". The angel investors factor is efficient. We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough XML. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The accounting factor is turn-key. Think cross-media. We invariably synergize sticky e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The capability to seize perfectly leads to the capability to e-enable efficiently. We believe we know that if you brand strategically then you may also architect virally. Think six-sigma. Think viral. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to drive defiantly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based TQM and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. HorsePorn has revamped the theory of re-sizing. We will visualize the commonly-used buzzword "C2B2B". The scalable, collaborative convergence monitoring factor is interactive. Without R&D, you will lack structuring. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for monitoring unplanned-for channels? The metrics for reconfigurable, magnetic process management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? We will increase our power to embrace without reducing our aptitude to facilitate. A company that can grow fiercely will (one day) be able to evolve fiercely.