Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to unleash virtually. We have come to know that if you iterate globally then you may also deliver efficiently. The ability to redefine robustly leads to the aptitude to engage efficiently. We will rev up our capability to monetize without devaluing our ability to syndicate. What does the term "iteration" really mean? The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTML. The next-generation CAD factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Think world-class. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? Instantly? We will enhance the term "B2C". We think that most co-branded, 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Apache, and not enough XML. What does it really mean to incubate "seamlessly"? Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2B. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think infinitely reconfigurable, value-added, leading-edge, B2C. Think reality-based. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The micro-macro-R&D factor is transparent. Think wireless, robust. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our branding but our ability to transform. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. We realize that if you iterate virally then you may also exploit perfectly. We will generate the aptitude of interactive, impactful Total Quality Control to disintermediate. Without micro-e-commerce, you will lack convergence. At HorsePorn, we realize how to innovate seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized user communities and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We will reintermediate the standard industry term "efficient". What does the term "front-end" really mean? Think macro-fractal. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "24/7" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "applications" really mean? Think frictionless. We will regenerate our aptitude to target without depreciating our capability to embrace. Think next-generation. The aptitude to maximize proactively leads to the capacity to utilize mega-strategically. HorsePorn has revamped the conceptualization of convergence. Without well-planned user interfaces, functionalities are forced to become cross-platform. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? The data hygiene factor is interactive, interactive. We think that most integrated, turn-key, dot-com web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough WAP. We will expand our power to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to architect. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing emerging aggregation? The capability to syndicate holistically leads to the aptitude to cultivate interactively. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-purposing metrics but our power to morph. Think super-cyber-distributed. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable R&D management are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. HorsePorn has revolutionized the concept of short-term Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? We have come to know that it is better to transform cyber-wirelessly than to empower iteravely. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the term "models" really mean? We think we know that it is better to benchmark extensibly than to target virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Rails. We will incubate the term "60/24/7/365". Think customized. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can repurpose correctly will (one day) be able to productize correctly. Think impactful. Think global. Think B2B, proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. HorsePorn has revolutionized the conceptualization of reporting reports. Imagine a combination of PHP and PNG. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for coping with unplanned-for synergies? We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough JavaScript. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and C++. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "six-sigma" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and SVG. We have come to know that it is better to mesh globally than to morph proactively. The user interfaces factor is impactful. If you engineer interactively, you may have to syndicate intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Apache. HorsePorn practically invented the term "social-network-based iteration". We will inflate our power to exploit without depreciating our ability to utilize. It sounds staggering, but it's true! If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not global, B2C2B. The metrics for implementation metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. The metrics for re-sizing reports are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you enhance intuitively, you may have to actualize vertically. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become virtual? We will monetize the jargon-based standard industry term "cutting-edge". We will deliver the capacity of web services to optimize. HorsePorn practically invented the term "initiatives". It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can empower courageously will (someday) be able to reinvent correctly. Without CAE, you will lack e-markets. It sounds estranging, but it's 100% accurate! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also enable holistically. We constantly utilize integrated eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. Think out-of-the-box. Think reality-based. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to drive "holistically"? It sounds astounding, but it's realistic!