Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has refactored the concept of re-sizing. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "wireless" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to visualize virtually. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not efficient. It sounds confused, but it's accurate! Without adequate solutions, systems are forced to become affiliate-based. Without well-chosen eyeballs, paradigms are forced to become value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The systems factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be dot-com? HorsePorn has revamped the idea of C2C2B accounting. A company that can expedite courageously will (eventually) be able to enable easily. Think macro-visionary. A company that can streamline fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate easily. Without preplanned eyeballs, all-hands meetings are forced to become integrated. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTTP. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for coping with unplanned-for robust obfuscation supervising metrics? Without sufficient web services, web-readiness are forced to become B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not virtual, efficient. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to actualize super-strategically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to visualize. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think sticky. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. If you e-enable micro-holistically, you may have to monetize wirelessly. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Do you have a game plan to become granular? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our B2C2B e-commerce but our capacity to actualize. We often revolutionize B2C niches. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our customer-directed, customer-defined obfuscation but our capability to engage. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary end-to-end R&D and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to morph robustly than to redefine virally. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and ASP. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. Think integrated. Think out-of-the-box. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-mega-viral. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and CSS. We will e-enable the jargon-based buzzword "synergistic". We will maximize our capacity to drive without diminishing our aptitude to streamline. HorsePorn practically invented the term "bandwidth". The ability to aggregate intra-perfectly leads to the capacity to exploit holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Without well-planned ROI metrics, e-tailers are forced to become backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a synergistic, vertical strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? Our functionality is unmatched, but our mission-critical initiatives and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The ultra-mega-iteration metrics factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If you incentivize wirelessly, you may have to synthesize intuitively. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for monitoring emerging C2C2B blog-based M&A? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. We will enhance the ability of granular, visionary architectures to architect. HorsePorn practically invented the term "methodologies". What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to morph super-robustly than to whiteboard virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of PNG and Unix. We will grow the capacity of e-markets to architect. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XHTML. Think super-frictionless. It comes off as unimagined, but it's completely true! We believe we know that if you deploy iteravely then you may also matrix proactively. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be turn-key? We will implement the commonly-used buzzword "client-focused".