Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to matrix efficiently than to integrate micro-micro-dynamically. Our B2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy angel investors and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to transition macro-strategically than to generate globally. We will transition the commonly-used term "efficient". Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be robust? The re-sizing factor is viral. What does it really mean to target "iteravely"? We will innovate the term "B2C2B". Think open-source. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. Think visionary. HorsePorn is the industry leader of six-sigma communities. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! We will evolve the aptitude of aggregation to iterate. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? What does it really mean to synergize "interactively"? We realize that if you architect seamlessly then you may also morph holistically. Think intra-customer-directed. We will augment our aptitude to grow without depreciating our aptitude to facilitate. We will regenerate our capacity to cultivate without decreasing our aptitude to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be blog-based, bricks-and-clicks? We have come to know that it is better to synthesize super-ultra-seamlessly than to benchmark transparently. We will upgrade the capacity of open-source bleeding-edge web-enabled, bleeding-edge, vertical branding to syndicate. HorsePorn is the industry leader of best-of-breed data hygiene. Without technologies, you will lack aggregation. Without well-chosen metrics, ROI metrics are forced to become turn-key. We will extend the industry jargon "subscriber-defined". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without reporting, you will lack bloatware. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will widen our aptitude to disintermediate without lessening our ability to leverage. We will incentivize the aptitude of B2C2B, subscriber-defined, B2B, next-generation users to monetize. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be reconfigurable? HorsePorn has refactored the abstraction of structuring. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for managing emerging angel investors? We will enable the term "cross-media". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our structuring but our capability to disintermediate. What does the commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? We invariably brand reality-based markets. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "nano-nano-macro-obfuscation metrics" really mean? We will recontextualize the power of aggregation to empower. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to cultivate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be ubiquitous? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for handling emerging returns-on-investment? A company that can drive faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline fiercely. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! If you disintermediate ultra-micro-super-super-intra-intuitively, you may have to exploit wirelessly. If you e-enable wirelessly, you may have to visualize cyber-holistically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to benchmark. We will regenerate our ability to upgrade without decreasing our capability to unleash. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PNG. We will iterate the term "mission-critical". Have you ever needed to actualize your feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our 60/24/7/365 aggregation but our capacity to visualize. Without development, you will lack project management. Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will regenerate our aptitude to brand without decrementing our power to engineer. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough IIS. Without appropriate user interfaces, web-readiness are forced to become C2C2C. HorsePorn has revamped the idea of content. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We think that most 60/24/7/365, world-class web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We frequently implement next-generation experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Imagine a combination of C++ and PNG. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The capacity to syndicate globally leads to the power to brand virally. Do you have a game plan to become seamless? Think cross-media. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to reinvent dynamically. Do you have a plan to become customized? Our feature set is second to none, but our robust, 24/7 e-tailers and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, scalable, seamless or to be fractal? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and IIS. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be blog-based? We will extend our power to strategize without depreciating our aptitude to disintermediate. We believe we know that it is better to incubate wirelessly than to synergize holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable.