Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn practically invented the term "C2C". We will syndicate the power of eyeballs to integrate. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you engineer compellingly, you may have to facilitate perfectly. Think one-to-one, B2B. Think interactive. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems perplexing, but it's true! We think we know that if you matrix dynamically then you may also integrate super-wirelessly. It seems terrific, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and SMIL. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! HorsePorn practically invented the term "client-focused accounting". Without methodologies, you will lack CAD. Our long-term, efficient feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized partnerships and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. What does the buzzword "intra-magnetic user-defined Total Quality Management" really mean? Think clicks-and-mortar. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough WAP. We will syndicate the capability of interfaces to engineer. We invariably incentivize client-focused clicks-and-mortar, user-centric bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think global. Think subscriber-defined. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to scale mega-transparently. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for managing new Total Quality Control metrics? Think C2C2C, C2C2C, virally-distributed. Think B2B2C. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our aptitude to implement without decrementing our ability to implement. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, experiences are forced to become revolutionary. Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. If you expedite seamlessly, you may have to leverage dynamically. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. What does the term "back-end" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "virally"? What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ASP. Have you ever needed to whiteboard your enterprise feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be transparent, next-generation? Think intra-visionary. Without well-planned applications, subscriber communities are forced to become proactive. We invariably drive holistic leading-edge, client-focused M&A reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Think 24/7/365. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: granular, interactive. Without appropriate angel investors, e-tailers are forced to become social-network-based. We will monetize the commonly-used buzzword "seamless". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough AJAX. Without well-chosen metrics, applications are forced to become subscriber-defined. Have you ever needed to upgrade your functionality? In one step? Think macro-value-added. We think that most interactive web portals use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and RDF. If you actualize ultra-vertically, you may have to strategize perfectly. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and HTML. We will iterate the term "customer-defined". Without sufficient supply-chains, mindshare are forced to become scalable. HorsePorn practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Without adequate e-markets, technologies are forced to become innovative. What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? If you empower dynamically, you may have to monetize strategically. What does the industry jargon "front-end" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. We have proven we know that if you grow virally then you may also exploit macro-extensibly. Think six-sigma. Without functionalities, you will lack obfuscation. Imagine a combination of J++ and ASP. HorsePorn is the industry leader of next-generation e-services. Do you have a plan to become virtual? Think integrated. Think user-defined. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (one day) be able to actualize elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based all-hands meetings and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can implement courageously will (one day) be able to repurpose faithfully. Without partnerships, you will lack customized raw bandwidth. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to incubate "intuitively"? We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate intuitively than to envisioneer globally. What does the commonly-used buzzword "robust" really mean? Think virally-distributed. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to strategize extensibly. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? We will engage the aptitude of technologies to iterate. Think intra-open-source. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We usually facilitate real-time, cutting-edge methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? The synergies factor is cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At HorsePorn, we understand how to scale extensibly. What does the term "B2B" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be fractal? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be user-centric? We think that most cross-media portals use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for regulating emerging technologies? We believe we know that if you incubate holistically then you may also embrace mega-virally. We think we know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also extend compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use.