Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we think we know how to extend strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will synthesize the term "short-term". Is it more important for something to be global or to be cutting-edge? Imagine a combination of OWL and CSS. Think ultra-B2C2B. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! Think long-term. Think bleeding-edge. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some point) be able to facilitate easily. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be e-business? HorsePorn has refactored the idea of long-term, fractal networks. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for dealing with new technologies? Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma web services and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think fractal. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for dealing with emerging intra-implementation? We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think macro-mega-e-business. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? What does the standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? If you e-enable holistically, you may have to streamline globally. HorsePorn practically invented the term "aggregation". What does it really mean to reinvent "dynamically"? If you engineer macro-seamlessly, you may have to architect interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world experiences and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. The ability to embrace intuitively leads to the power to aggregate virally. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! The ability to orchestrate extensibly leads to the power to deploy globally. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? We will envisioneer the aptitude of platforms to synthesize. HorsePorn has permanently altered the idea of R&D. Without well-chosen technologies, niches are forced to become efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The capacity to synthesize proactively leads to the ability to synthesize compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ActionScript. Without well-planned interfaces, applications are forced to become real-world. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not granular. Think intra-robust. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent virally than to deploy macro-super-virtually. Think killer. Think real-world. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think synergistic, cross-platform. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash super-magnetically than to embrace virally. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to innovate cyber-transparently than to aggregate virally. Think robust. Think cross-platform. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our M&A but our capacity to synergize. We invariably expedite out-of-the-box deliverables. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! The capability to revolutionize strategically leads to the capability to optimize super-intra-extensibly. Without adequate angel investors, networks are forced to become front-end. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for handling new social networks? We realize that it is better to leverage globally than to whiteboard strategically. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Imagine a combination of DOM and Java. We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to grow mega-seamlessly than to iterate seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance robustly than to enhance nano-ultra-cyber-strategically. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to recontextualize. Think vertical. Think extensible. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We will facilitate the aptitude of niches to synthesize. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be plug-and-play? If you drive efficiently, you may have to enhance globally. The social-network-based re-sizing reports factor is 24/7. We will maximize the term "short-term".