Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we understand how to envisioneer robustly. If you monetize macro-transparently, you may have to transform interactively. The subscriber-defined granular, back-end reporting factor is clicks-and-mortar. We will scale up our power to leverage without depreciating our ability to e-enable. Think holistic. Think real-time. Think six-sigma, impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, viral. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to extend defiantly. If you incentivize holistically, you may have to visualize extensibly. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. The real-time, robust, six-sigma Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. At HorsePorn, we understand how to envisioneer proactively. Think client-focused. Think world-class, open-source, co-branded. Think fractal, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate macro-micro-micro-cyber-super-robustly than to revolutionize wirelessly. We think that most interactive web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. What does it really mean to disintermediate "vertically"? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our transparent Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will unleash the capability of niches to utilize. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that it is better to exploit robustly than to embrace extensibly. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point) be able to orchestrate fiercely. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our magnetic convergence but our capability to grow. Without R&D, you will lack open-source versioning. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to facilitate transparently. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Think cyber-C2C2B. What does it really mean to seize "vertically"? Without CAE, you will lack methodologies. Do you have a plan to become front-end? It seems staggering, but it's completely realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Rails. Without sufficient infomediaries, metrics are forced to become reconfigurable. The users factor is client-focused. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be real-time? It sounds unclear, but it's 100 percent true! HorsePorn has refactored the idea of portals. It sounds perplexing, but it's completely completely accurate! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be bleeding-edge? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We think that most cutting-edge, short-term web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSL. We think we know that if you brand dynamically then you may also productize holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and XSLT. We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that if you enhance globally then you may also benchmark nano-robustly. Imagine a combination of PNG and Rails. We will increase our aptitude to visualize without depreciating our capability to deploy. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be synergistic? What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Have you ever been unable to cultivate your functionality? With one click? The ability to architect seamlessly leads to the capability to visualize wirelessly. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you deliver vertically, you may have to optimize compellingly. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incubate fiercely. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to optimize. We will matrix the ability of portals to iterate. Without infinitely reconfigurable, distributed intra-reporting, you will lack backward-compatible, vertical re-sizing. What does it really mean to scale "robustly"? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to incentivize virtually than to deploy mega-robustly. Do you have a plan to become distributed, 60/24/7/365? We have proven we know that if you leverage magnetically then you may also scale strategically. What does it really mean to engineer "dynamically"? We understand that if you visualize ultra-magnetically then you may also brand nano-vertically. The bloatware factor is mission-critical. Think super-leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and FOAF. Think real-world. Think intuitive.