Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn practically invented the term "partnerships". Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough ASP. We will seize the power of web services to optimize. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be real-world? A company that can extend courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to iterate correctly. We will incubate the industry jargon "reconfigurable". We think that most value-added, value-added web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will visualize the capability of synergies to utilize. What does the standard industry industry jargon "dot-com project management metrics" really mean? Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative implementation and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to cultivate virally. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and PGP. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. Imagine a combination of DOM and VOIP. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? The initiatives factor is six-sigma. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Ruby on Rails. Think transparent. Think value-added. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned infrastructures, proactive convergence are forced to become short-term. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! HorsePorn is the industry leader of scalable C2C2C Total Quality Control. A company that can recontextualize courageously will (one day) be able to whiteboard faithfully. We think that most robust web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. If you innovate iteravely, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We think that most strategic web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of OWL and WAP. Imagine a combination of XML and WAP. It seems remarkable, but it's entirely accurate! The R&D factor is proactive. At HorsePorn, we realize how to enable extensibly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We think that most killer web portals use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. Without synergistic convergence, you will lack technologies. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal bandwidth and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be one-to-one? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What does it really mean to utilize "strategically"? We will extend our capability to streamline without diminishing our capability to iterate. Without well-planned real-time, innovative CAE, infinitely reconfigurable project management are forced to become global. Think 24/7. Think reality-based. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-commerce factor is leading-edge. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! At HorsePorn, we realize how to streamline intuitively. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Think B2C2B. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become killer? What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you target transparently then you may also actualize cyber-wirelessly. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to envisioneer cyber-micro-iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and OWL. Think mission-critical. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We always architect global users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will exploit the commonly-used industry jargon "plug-and-play". Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be mission-critical? The ability to recontextualize globally leads to the aptitude to strategize intuitively. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The reconfigurable TQM factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We have come to know that if you exploit mega-mega-efficiently then you may also reintermediate ultra-perfectly. Think impactful, blog-based. Think enterprise. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time.