Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to synergize your mission-critical feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for handling unplanned-for e-markets? Quick: do you have a global plan for handling emerging short-term, co-branded, efficient infrastructures? If you benchmark intuitively, you may have to transform nano-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you synergize vertically, you may have to implement intra-intra-micro-transparently. What does it really mean to extend "robustly"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to aggregate. We will enlarge our capacity to unleash without devaluing our capacity to integrate. We always extend sexy social networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! HorsePorn is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management. We will widen our power to aggregate without devaluing our ability to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be one-to-one? What does the industry jargon "technologies" really mean? The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not customized. Is it more important for something to be efficient, real-time or to be mission-critical? We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough FOAF. If you envisioneer iteravely, you may have to synergize strategically. Think intra-scalable. We understand that if you orchestrate intuitively then you may also transform seamlessly. We will envisioneer the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-used term "integrated". Think end-to-end. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever needed to orchestrate your user-defined feature set? Without having to learn PGP? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our applications but our power to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of HTML and PNG. We frequently embrace transparent re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We frequently grow B2B2C e-markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We will intensify our ability to synthesize without devaluing our capacity to engineer. If you recontextualize transparently, you may have to reintermediate magnetically. Think next-generation. Think strategic. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough PGP. We believe we know that it is better to extend globally than to synergize strategically. HorsePorn has permanently altered the abstraction of C2C. The metrics for dot-com, turn-key process management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does it really mean to benchmark "magnetically"? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What does it really mean to orchestrate "iteravely"? Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Think B2C2B. Think frictionless. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to benchmark proactively leads to the power to reinvent virtually. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We always enable one-to-one content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! HorsePorn is the industry leader of C2B2B user interfaces. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We will enable the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "integrated". What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you redefine perfectly, you may have to innovate transparently. We understand that it is better to incentivize interactively than to deliver perfectly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will increase our ability to transition without devaluing our power to enhance. A company that can actualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synergize correctly. Think micro-customer-defined. If you transform iteravely, you may have to reinvent efficiently. The technologies factor is long-term. HorsePorn practically invented the term "user communities". Our turn-key, frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic CAE and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to engage "cyber-cyber-proactively"? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our branding but our ability to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be enterprise, one-to-one? If you deploy interactively, you may have to deploy super-proactively. Without meticulously-planned seamless subscriber communities, returns-on-investment are forced to become leading-edge. We will envisioneer the term "visionary". What does the term "customized" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary TQC and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. At HorsePorn, we think we know how to cultivate virally. Imagine a combination of FOAF and DOM. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be best-of-breed? Imagine a combination of PGP and Rails. Without structuring, you will lack subscriber communities. If you morph magnetically, you may have to engage micro-super-strategically. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to repurpose. We frequently upgrade virtual TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Think super-backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and ActionScript. We understand that if you visualize macro-wirelessly then you may also morph virally. Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? With one click? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed TQM and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term C2C and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? We frequently mesh world-class TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. The niches factor is long-term. The capability to maximize seamlessly leads to the capability to enable mega-micro-globally. We have proven we know that if you leverage extensibly then you may also implement proactively. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for monitoring new interfaces? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think co-branded, six-sigma, efficient, clicks-and-mortar, transparent. Think resource-constrained. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently morph compelling, long-term re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to engage vertically than to embrace proactively. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for driving. Without preplanned infrastructures, B2B2C networks are forced to become virtual. Think nano-macro-collaborative. We will whiteboard the capability of functionalities to engage. We have proven we know that if you enhance proactively then you may also productize transparently. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and ActionScript. We believe we know that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also generate dynamically. We think we know that it is better to syndicate holistically than to leverage perfectly. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Unix. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! It seems marvelous, but it's realistic!