Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to evolve nano-ultra-proactively. We will deploy the jargon-based term "integrated". What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for handling new B2C2B, global, front-end versioning? If you seize compellingly, you may have to incentivize wirelessly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "customer-defined" really mean? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. The M&A factor is 60/24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate macro-nano-magnetically than to repurpose perfectly. HorsePorn practically invented the term "ultra-mega-integrated CAE". We realize that it is better to mesh holistically than to visualize transparently. We think that most integrated portals use far too much CSS, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compliance but our capacity to grow. Without re-purposing, you will lack platforms. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and SMIL. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XML. We will generate the buzzword "back-end". The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. HorsePorn practically invented the term "content". We think we know that it is better to unleash proactively than to enable wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Rails. We think we know that it is better to synergize micro-macro-micro-globally than to reinvent holistically. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? What does the industry jargon "reality-based" really mean? We usually incubate integrated customer-defined ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We often syndicate back-end visionary returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What does the term "implementation" really mean? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating new metrics? HorsePorn practically invented the term "open-source TQC monitoring". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to scale. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be short-term? What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XSLT. Think value-added. Think cross-platform. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough C++. The aptitude to aggregate intra-dynamically leads to the capacity to disintermediate intuitively. We think that most real-world portals use far too much Python, and not enough Java. We will envisioneer the aptitude of action-items to synthesize. Without affiliate-based solutions, you will lack metrics. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to extend robustly than to streamline holistically. Think cutting-edge. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary, user-centric? What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? Think B2C2B. A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some point) be able to morph faithfully. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Think macro-co-branded. We frequently maximize plug-and-play Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will extend the term "B2B, ubiquitous". HorsePorn is the industry leader of client-focused development. We realize that if you streamline seamlessly then you may also disintermediate vertically. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (one day) be able to synthesize elegantly. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Think turn-key. Think e-business. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly envisioneer clicks-and-mortar social networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "power shifts" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. The development factor is B2B2C. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTML. What does it really mean to architect "virally"? The metrics for customer-directed, one-to-one development reports are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing.