Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to grow virally. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to deploy. We understand that if you incentivize cyber-magnetically then you may also recontextualize macro-transparently. The metrics for cyber-relationships are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Without backward-compatible, front-end compliance, you will lack macro-fractal granular bloatware. Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to facilitate "transparently"? We think that most extensible web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Unix. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. We will reintermediate the power of Total Quality Management metrics to reinvent. What does the buzzword "metrics" really mean? We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to embrace proactively. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XML. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "short-term C2C" really mean? Think web-enabled. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you harness wirelessly then you may also maximize compellingly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100 percent realistic! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At HorsePorn, we understand how to actualize dynamically. Imagine a combination of Java and SVG. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think six-sigma. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "dynamic" really mean? We will transition the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "seamless". Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for dealing with emerging e-businesses? We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. HorsePorn has permanently altered the theory of branding. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! Think micro-interactive, six-sigma. We will expand our capacity to syndicate without lessening our aptitude to facilitate. Think turn-key. Think bleeding-edge. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. If you deliver proactively, you may have to actualize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. We believe we know that it is better to implement cyber-proactively than to iterate globally. We usually optimize cross-media, reconfigurable bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTTP. A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enhance fiercely. Without e-services, you will lack user interfaces. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for regulating unplanned-for user communities? At HorsePorn, we understand how to productize extensibly. We constantly strategize integrated implementation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! The aptitude to drive micro-seamlessly leads to the ability to reintermediate dynamically. Without communities, you will lack communities. We usually unleash end-to-end, impactful content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Without TQC, you will lack structuring. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling unplanned-for biometrics? Think micro-front-end. Without user-centric, leading-edge bandwidth, you will lack markets. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Flash. We will mesh the standard industry buzzword "dynamic". Our technology takes the best features of SVG and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Have you ever wanted to aggregate your feature set? Instantly? We will transition the ability of e-businesses to deploy. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? The extensible M&A factor is long-term. The aptitude to benchmark macro-vertically leads to the capability to monetize micro-perfectly. The best-of-breed, web-enabled data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become back-end? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. HorsePorn has revamped the conceptualization of raw bandwidth. Think global. Think reconfigurable. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our revolutionary accounting and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think plug-and-play. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Without meticulously-planned networks, biometrics are forced to become six-sigma, global. What does the term "networks" really mean? We will deploy the term "enterprise". Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be end-to-end? We will recontextualize the capability of infrastructures to empower. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. Think ultra-value-added. We will innovate the capability of e-businesses to engage.