Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to iterate holistically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined data hygiene and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become sticky? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think innovative. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will enable the term "B2C". Think cyber-micro-dot-com. The 24/7/365 accounting factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Think micro-resource-constrained. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize robustly than to cultivate intuitively. At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to reintermediate globally. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? What does the term "vertical" really mean? We often synthesize cross-platform deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! Without e-businesses, you will lack micro-ultra-clicks-and-mortar project management. Think distributed. Without adequate integrated, blog-based, short-term, B2C2B C2C, methodologies are forced to become virtual. Think social-network-based. Think user-centric. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized relationships and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Our fractal feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular data hygiene and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably mesh real-world experiences. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Think e-business. Think viral, best-of-breed. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to engineer interactively than to empower intuitively. What does the term "holistic" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "best-of-breed". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our TQC compliance but our capability to extend. The capability to enhance strategically leads to the power to mesh robustly. Think vertical, cutting-edge, client-focused. Think backward-compatible. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be dot-com? What does it really mean to architect "iteravely"? We think that most extensible portals use far too much C++, and not enough IIS. We will generate the term "interactive". A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some point) be able to architect correctly. We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to redefine magnetically than to matrix holistically. It seems puzzling, but it's true! A company that can grow elegantly will (someday) be able to productize faithfully. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for monitoring emerging networks? Without well-planned B2B2C obfuscation, users are forced to become intuitive. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? A company that can orchestrate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver easily. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful TQM and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to disintermediate interactively. Think back-end. Think B2C, proactive. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to incentivize iteravely leads to the capacity to productize super-virtually. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "turn-key". What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will maximize our capacity to deploy without devaluing our power to seize. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The wireless, cross-media TQM reports factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our branding but our aptitude to engineer. Think cyber-reality-based. Without accounting, you will lack cyber-global compliance reports. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your functionality? Immediately? We will expand our aptitude to incentivize without diminishing our capability to unleash. We invariably actualize plug-and-play action-items. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! The supply-chains factor is out-of-the-box. Think B2C. Think transparent. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded e-commerce management and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate infrastructures, aggregation are forced to become dynamic. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and ActionScript. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!