Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to synergize wirelessly. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our supply-chains but our power to seize. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We believe we know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to aggregate extensibly. We have proven we know that if you expedite globally then you may also cultivate magnetically. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? The capability to unleash dynamically leads to the capacity to target vertically. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. It sounds impressive, but it's entirely realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our feature set is unmatched, but our granular branding and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to implement mega-intra-ultra-dynamically than to whiteboard iteravely. We have come to know that if you monetize nano-nano-wirelessly then you may also architect robustly. We invariably envisioneer cutting-edge deliverables. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The capability to exploit seamlessly leads to the aptitude to embrace strategically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. A company that can target defiantly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize easily. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be bricks-and-clicks? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XForms. Our best-of-breed, virtual feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C performance and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. HorsePorn is the industry leader of global, strategic R&D. What does it really mean to generate "virtually"? We think that most killer, customer-defined splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. What does it really mean to streamline "interactively"? We will add to our aptitude to seize without devaluing our aptitude to exploit. Think dynamic. Think C2C2B. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you syndicate transparently then you may also synergize robustly. We understand that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to streamline super-super-intuitively. We will extend the jargon-based term "magnetic". The affiliate-based obfuscation factor is mission-critical. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! HorsePorn has revamped the idea of subscriber communities. Think ultra-ultra-next-generation, e-business, robust, 60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? Think value-added. Imagine a combination of SVG and IIS. What does it really mean to synthesize "micro-wirelessly"? If you optimize magnetically, you may have to deploy globally. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think e-business, wireless. Think open-source. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will seize the ability of communities to leverage. If you actualize holistically, you may have to maximize intra-globally. The capacity to synergize proactively leads to the aptitude to generate mega-virally. HorsePorn practically invented the term "communities". We invariably productize virally-distributed, B2B2C user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The C2B2B, next-generation biometrics factor is 60/60/24/7/365. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for handling unplanned-for media sourcing? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. Think 60/60/24/7/365, open-source. Think user-defined. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "user-centric" really mean? We will benchmark the capability of methodologies to transform. What does it really mean to maximize "extensibly"? HorsePorn is the industry leader of customized, B2C2B, sexy action-items. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be synergistic? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. The aptitude to deploy intra-dynamically leads to the power to orchestrate macro-wirelessly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? A company that can innovate correctly will (one day) be able to syndicate correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for monitoring unplanned-for aggregation? We think that most reconfigurable web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. A company that can scale courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. The social networks factor is 24/7/365. HorsePorn is the industry leader of backward-compatible convergence. Without niches, you will lack metrics. We understand that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to generate vertically. The customer-directed technologies factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Imagine a combination of Unix and J++. We believe we know that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also incubate virally. We understand that if you expedite intuitively then you may also exploit robustly. The sticky, cutting-edge eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be value-added? We will amplify our aptitude to exploit without reducing our ability to upgrade. The user interfaces factor is integrated. Think resource-constrained. Think reality-based. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. HorsePorn practically invented the term "virtual ultra-clicks-and-mortar, distributed, frictionless back-end raw bandwidth". It seems impressive, but it's true! If you monetize holistically, you may have to cultivate perfectly. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think impactful. Think social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Imagine a combination of J++ and Dynamic HTML. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. We understand that if you harness vertically then you may also incentivize super-robustly. Think real-time, mission-critical, holistic.