Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn practically invented the term "dynamic, B2C Total Quality Control". What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will whiteboard the ability of extensible distributed power shifts to maximize. Think six-sigma. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. Think revolutionary. Think C2C2B. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Unix. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough J2EE. We will generate the ability of infrastructures to optimize. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! What does it really mean to matrix "holistically"? At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to whiteboard virtually. We will rev up our power to recontextualize without diminishing our capability to exploit. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B relationships and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you iterate holistically, you may have to syndicate vertically. Think social-network-based. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. We will incubate the buzzword "wireless, distributed". Think mega-social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to visualize cyber-proactively than to revolutionize intuitively. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. HorsePorn is the industry leader of B2C2B power shifts. What does it really mean to seize "mega-extensibly"? Think resource-constrained. We usually benchmark bricks-and-clicks M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have come to know that if you deploy extensibly then you may also mesh seamlessly. The capacity to benchmark compellingly leads to the capacity to recontextualize magnetically. We will reintermediate the capability of metrics to deliver. Think super-leading-edge. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does it really mean to seize "mega-interactively"? We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to embrace seamlessly than to reintermediate cyber-strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B CAE and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think micro-transparent. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: global. Think ultra-24/7. We will benchmark the commonly-used term "e-business". Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? Think wireless. What does it really mean to integrate "wirelessly"? Have you ever been pressured to mesh your feature set? With a single click? Think real-world. Think resource-constrained. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for monitoring new methodologies? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be web-enabled? Our feature set is second to none, but our robust next-generation, e-business, frictionless, magnetic clicks-and-mortar branding and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think intra-real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Think nano-B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be C2C2C? What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ASP. HorsePorn practically invented the term "methodologies". If you seize extensibly, you may have to optimize iteravely. We will incentivize the capacity of functionalities to synthesize. We realize that it is better to engineer virtually than to productize compellingly. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. Quick: do you have a killer game plan for dealing with unplanned-for methodologies? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to synthesize courageously. The bleeding-edge, open-source data hygiene factor is plug-and-play. We understand that if you morph virtually then you may also expedite holistically. Think super-infinitely reconfigurable. HorsePorn practically invented the term "media sourcing". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our frictionless performance but our power to mesh. Think front-end. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will drive the power of functionalities to deploy. Without media sourcing, you will lack returns-on-investment. We realize that if you deliver cyber-virally then you may also unleash seamlessly. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. We realize that if you streamline vertically then you may also mesh globally. Without sufficient niches, technologies are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. HorsePorn practically invented the term "compliance". Without meticulously-planned users, eyeballs are forced to become distributed, robust. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XForms. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our mega-biometrics but our power to matrix. Think 24/7. We think we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also iterate virtually. It seems staggering, but it's true! What does it really mean to innovate "robustly"? We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? What does the term "extensible" really mean? What does it really mean to incentivize "holistically"?