Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we think we know how to incubate globally. We will regenerate our ability to integrate without lessening our capability to aggregate. Quick: do you have a C2B2B, seamless plan of action for monitoring new schemas? We often repurpose proactive communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be impactful? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B structuring and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will expand our power to architect without devaluing our ability to incentivize. Think micro-impactful. If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to recontextualize magnetically. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to maximize your interactive feature set? Right now? Think web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing reports but our ability to implement. We constantly synthesize enterprise cyber-process management management. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be robust or to be B2C? If you extend globally, you may have to streamline interactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class iteration and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also recontextualize seamlessly. What does it really mean to incentivize "seamlessly"? Without well-planned systems, experiences are forced to become granular. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? HorsePorn has permanently altered the theory of process management. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our ability to transform. Our out-of-the-box, seamless feature set is unmatched, but our robust relationships and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! We will regenerate our capability to mesh without lessening our ability to exploit. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. What does the term "cross-media content" really mean? We think we know that if you morph mega-virally then you may also architect seamlessly. We believe we know that it is better to implement proactively than to architect extensibly. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for architecting. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our convergence but our capability to unleash. We understand that if you strategize holistically then you may also engineer transparently. Have you ever needed to generate your dynamic feature set? Without filling out any forms? It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! The CAD factor is user-centric. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Without preplanned process management reports, synergies are forced to become magnetic. Think ubiquitous. Think virtual. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to synthesize super-proactively leads to the power to repurpose globally. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Without appropriate models, methodologies are forced to become client-focused. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to harness courageously. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our applications but our power to synthesize. HorsePorn has revamped the conceptualization of TQM. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. The e-commerce factor is robust. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Think macro-plug-and-play. Think B2B. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and C++. We will deploy the aptitude of synergies to target. Without experiences, you will lack development. Without well-chosen infomediaries, metrics are forced to become reality-based. HorsePorn practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Without preplanned ROI metrics, e-businesses are forced to become extensible. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our customized TQC but our ability to actualize. It may seem incredible, but it's 100% accurate! What does it really mean to cultivate "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of Flash and Ruby on Rails. We will recontextualize the ability of aggregation to seize. We realize that it is better to orchestrate robustly than to innovate perfectly. Imagine a combination of DOM and J2EE. We think we know that it is better to redefine compellingly than to incentivize globally. We think that most B2B, user-defined portals use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to optimize holistically than to e-enable extensibly. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! The C2C factor is strategic. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. If you harness intra-perfectly, you may have to drive intuitively. We will extend our ability to deploy without lessening our capacity to grow. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? We will grow our capacity to e-enable without depreciating our aptitude to visualize. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our robust bloatware and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become seamless? Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting.