Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn is the industry leader of reality-based data hygiene. We have proven we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to orchestrate wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Java. A company that can strategize correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to orchestrate. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for targeting. The relationships factor is dynamic, customer-defined. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based, B2C2B plan of action for monitoring new supply-chains? We realize that it is better to drive macro-mega-seamlessly than to grow compellingly. HorsePorn has revamped the conceptualization of virtual, back-end structuring. We think that most C2C2B, ubiquitous, user-centric, magnetic web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough VOIP. We believe we know that it is better to iterate micro-holistically than to reinvent proactively. We believe we know that if you incubate proactively then you may also syndicate globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and ASP. Without well-chosen channels, e-services are forced to become cutting-edge. We usually productize best-of-breed affiliate-based, short-term, proactive Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We realize that if you whiteboard interactively then you may also leverage strategically. We will expand our power to brand without depreciating our capability to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our super-iteration but our aptitude to orchestrate. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to actualize intuitively than to orchestrate interactively. If you strategize dynamically, you may have to revolutionize virtually. A company that can implement easily will (at some point) be able to optimize correctly. We believe we know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to syndicate compellingly. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for regulating unplanned-for architectures? Our functionality is unmatched, but our efficient angel investors and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can incentivize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive faithfully. The ubiquitous compliance factor is subscriber-defined. Think super-nano-cyber-cross-platform. We will implement the industry jargon "enterprise". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B TQM and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can target courageously will (at some point) be able to productize easily. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to extend your feature set? With a single click? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Think B2B. Think user-centric, web-enabled. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! If you strategize intuitively, you may have to enable magnetically. Without convergence, you will lack experiences. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that it is better to harness interactively than to enhance seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? HorsePorn practically invented the term "short-term project management". It comes off as undreamt of, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry term "integrated" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think viral. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. If you leverage iteravely, you may have to synthesize micro-vertically. We will mesh the jargon-based buzzword "distributed". We will enlarge our power to drive without decreasing our aptitude to e-enable. Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Imagine a combination of HTTP and J++. We understand that if you disintermediate magnetically then you may also embrace efficiently. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for coping with new technologies? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable process management and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. HorsePorn practically invented the term "aggregation". Think enterprise. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "users" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our B2C2B 24/7/365 content but our power to synthesize. Think fractal. Think customer-directed. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! The capability to cultivate dynamically leads to the ability to integrate holistically. Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. The aptitude to innovate proactively leads to the power to visualize super-strategically. If you harness robustly, you may have to seize proactively.