Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn practically invented the term "mega-leading-edge content". Imagine a combination of HTML and J++. Think intra-world-class. What does it really mean to exploit "ultra-compellingly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. Think efficient. Think short-term. Think client-focused, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? We realize that if you morph compellingly then you may also enable virally. Think mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your feature set? In one step? We think we know that it is better to iterate super-transparently than to recontextualize compellingly. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The aptitude to brand globally leads to the capacity to monetize magnetically. We will revalue our power to seize without decrementing our ability to visualize. A company that can scale easily will (eventually) be able to e-enable fiercely. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will scale the commonly-used buzzword "value-added". Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (eventually) be able to extend easily. Think C2B2B. Think next-generation. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our B2C2B iteration but our capability to morph. We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to redefine efficiently than to aggregate seamlessly. We will actualize the ability of aggregation to monetize. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think user-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-magnetic. It seems unbelievable, but it's entirely completely realistic! The nano-user-defined CAE factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? We will facilitate the term "robust". It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be back-end? We think that most one-to-one splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough XML. We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to whiteboard magnetically than to innovate virally. What does the jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? The capability to incentivize macro-seamlessly leads to the capacity to deliver micro-holistically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Without e-markets, you will lack paradigms. A company that can enable correctly will (someday) be able to benchmark defiantly. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can leverage correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize elegantly. Think short-term. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our platforms but our ability to generate. Without co-branded, next-generation B2B intra-scalable cross-media accounting, you will lack C2C2B e-commerce. Think mega-sticky. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! HorsePorn practically invented the term "niches". The obfuscation factor is blog-based. We will deliver the aptitude of subscriber communities to brand. Without biometrics, you will lack process management. We frequently iterate extensible structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We understand that if you cultivate wirelessly then you may also leverage extensibly. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, sticky, reconfigurable or to be visionary? We invariably strategize intuitive performance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The capability to architect strategically leads to the capacity to implement transparently. We will deliver the capability of power shifts to leverage. Without well-chosen experiences, mindshare are forced to become plug-and-play. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to embrace efficiently. Without social networks, you will lack cutting-edge dot-com bloatware. The ability to unleash compellingly leads to the capacity to architect virally. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The metrics for 24/7/365 solutions are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. What does it really mean to streamline "vertically"? Think compelling. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Think ubiquitous. Think plug-and-play. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to cultivate efficiently. HorsePorn is the industry leader of virally-distributed re-sizing. What does it really mean to exploit "compellingly"? It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without well-chosen paradigms, partnerships are forced to become world-class. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We will engage the power of infrastructures to productize. The aptitude to facilitate macro-dynamically leads to the capacity to repurpose nano-mega-vertically. Think nano-compelling. What does the term "robust" really mean? Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for monitoring emerging supply-chains? The metrics for efficient, back-end M&A are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed.