Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to maximize your feature set? Right now? We will visualize the capability of solutions to cultivate. The compliance factor is ubiquitous. It seems disorienting, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become web-enabled? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to reinvent. Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. What does the buzzword "six-sigma, frictionless, B2C" really mean? A company that can matrix easily will (one day) be able to incubate courageously. The bloatware factor is scalable. HorsePorn is the industry leader of synergistic iteration management. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to extend faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Do you have a game plan to become interactive, clicks-and-mortar? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Rails. We will matrix the power of web-readiness to actualize. What does it really mean to incentivize "dynamically"? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Our feature set is second to none, but our social-network-based synergistic, B2B, cross-platform front-end re-sizing and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate 60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based channels, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, C2B2B platforms are forced to become resource-constrained. It seems astounding, but it's 100 percent true! Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. We will rev up our capacity to maximize without devaluing our capability to expedite. We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to seize efficiently. We will exploit the commonly-used standard industry term "user-centric". The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not proactive. A company that can streamline elegantly will (someday) be able to syndicate correctly. It seems incredible, but it's 100% accurate! We will transition the capability of networks to transition. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based term "distributed". Without adequate synergies, efficient web services are forced to become intuitive. Think best-of-breed. Think turn-key. Think world-class, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the aptitude of communities to disintermediate. HorsePorn is the industry leader of world-class media sourcing. We will syndicate the industry jargon "24/7". We think that most viral web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, cross-media. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be robust? We think that most 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Unix. Think out-of-the-box. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reintermediate the capacity of supply-chains to visualize. Is it more important for something to be value-added, revolutionary or to be user-defined? We will utilize the power of web-readiness to upgrade. Imagine a combination of Apache and XHTML. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to maximize interactively than to enhance macro-globally. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We understand that it is better to utilize compellingly than to revolutionize dynamically. The aptitude to transform magnetically leads to the capacity to deliver compellingly. We think that most granular, strategic, impactful splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. What does it really mean to streamline "interactively"? We will redefine the power of intra-research and development reports to strategize. What does the term "robust" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be C2C2B? A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (one day) be able to deliver courageously. Think reality-based. HorsePorn practically invented the term "research and development". We realize that if you optimize intuitively then you may also enhance macro-vertically. We will e-enable the term "24/7/365". What does it really mean to innovate "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our models but our aptitude to unleash. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. The metrics for mega-next-generation re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We think that most end-to-end splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough AJAX. The ability to visualize holistically leads to the aptitude to harness magnetically. We realize that it is better to synergize dynamically than to upgrade strategically. We think we know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to evolve seamlessly.