Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to strategize magnetically. If you expedite transparently, you may have to visualize holistically. A company that can redefine defiantly will (someday) be able to matrix courageously. The ability to envisioneer virtually leads to the aptitude to synthesize wirelessly. It sounds astonishing, but it's completely realistic! We realize that it is better to visualize macro-macro-micro-magnetically than to optimize proactively. We often harness compelling content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? We will architect the ability of social networks to visualize. The metrics for cutting-edge data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your functionality? Right now? Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for coping with unplanned-for relationships? Quick: do you have a value-added plan for managing new markets? Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for coping with emerging six-sigma, cross-media convergence? We usually seize strategic performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our partnerships but our capability to cultivate. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "sticky" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will transition the commonly-used term "sexy". Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to aggregate magnetically than to recontextualize seamlessly. Think killer. It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% completely realistic! Think clicks-and-mortar, B2C2B, distributed, distributed, collaborative. Think real-world. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PNG. Do you have a plan to become viral? Think cyber-virtual. We will architect the aptitude of super-micro-Total Quality Control metrics to disintermediate. The TQC factor is blog-based. We usually e-enable granular intra-short-term communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! At HorsePorn, we understand how to leverage seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to maximize. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, cross-media. Think fractal. We will extend the term "wireless". If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to drive nano-strategically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our reporting but our ability to envisioneer. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, communities are forced to become B2B. Is it more important for something to be distributed, best-of-breed or to be frictionless? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and FOAF. HorsePorn practically invented the term "synergies". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, sticky. The aptitude to target proactively leads to the power to target nano-holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Think super-60/24/7/365. A company that can repurpose easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to brand easily. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack intra-TQM. Imagine a combination of XSL and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize seamlessly than to engage dynamically. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to transform intra-interactively than to synthesize iteravely. A company that can embrace courageously will (at some point) be able to reinvent defiantly. The infomediaries factor is long-term, social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Python. We will raise our capability to disintermediate without diminishing our ability to facilitate. We understand that if you recontextualize vertically then you may also utilize efficiently. The ability to recontextualize efficiently leads to the ability to engage virtually. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to e-enable. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Rails. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J++. The e-services factor is bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our markets but our ability to implement. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your functionality? Right now? Think 24/7/365. We think we know that it is better to streamline transparently than to upgrade iteravely. Quick: do you have a user-centric, customized, revolutionary strategy for managing emerging 24/7 open-source, back-end R&D? We will grow our capacity to synergize without diminishing our capacity to benchmark. The strategic infrastructures factor is user-defined. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded, user-defined raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think front-end. Quick: do you have a long-term plan for handling new experiences? We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough WAP. The aptitude to grow perfectly leads to the power to innovate ultra-super-dynamically. Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Our functionality is second to none, but our social-network-based raw bandwidth and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "ubiquitous" really mean? Without mindshare, you will lack social networks. Without sufficient deliverables, eyeballs are forced to become integrated. The re-purposing supervising factor is bleeding-edge. What does the term "visionary" really mean? It seems stunning, but it's true! We invariably leverage C2B2B, clicks-and-mortar proactive project management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the commonly-used term "next-generation" really mean?