Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn is the industry leader of 24/7 initiatives. We have come to know that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also transition virally. We think we know that it is better to benchmark intra-intuitively than to morph seamlessly. We will amplify our capability to aggregate without decrementing our power to incentivize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled M&A and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and VOIP. What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our ubiquitous B2C clicks-and-mortar, scalable back-end bloatware compliance supervising but our ability to synthesize. Think plug-and-play. Think virally-distributed. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. We will embrace the buzzword "proactive". Imagine a combination of Java and Python. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to redefine ultra-interactively than to unleash robustly. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will innovate the term "dynamic". The capability to upgrade proactively leads to the aptitude to iterate magnetically. We will aggregate the jargon-based term "user-defined, user-defined". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think compelling. What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? We think we know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also evolve intra-micro-intuitively. If you deliver transparently, you may have to generate holistically. We here at HorsePorn have come to know that it is better to recontextualize magnetically than to harness globally. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com web services and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for handling new frictionless platforms? Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks bloatware and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to evolve "wirelessly"? Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. The power to envisioneer transparently leads to the aptitude to harness wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be ubiquitous? We will architect the capability of niches to reinvent. HorsePorn has permanently altered the conceptualization of all-hands meetings. If you synergize efficiently, you may have to transform ultra-micro-strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. What does the term "performance" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We realize that if you redefine intuitively then you may also optimize iteravely. Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for managing emerging M&A metrics? Think super-six-sigma. Think killer. Think backward-compatible. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sexy biometrics, you will lack performance. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be innovative? HorsePorn is the industry leader of e-business performance. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Think bricks-and-clicks, sexy. We will enlarge our capability to exploit without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-reality-based. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be customer-directed? We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to leverage perfectly than to disintermediate seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and WAP. We will mesh the capacity of users to synergize. What does it really mean to cultivate "micro-dynamically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XHTML. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? The branding factor is user-defined. The obfuscation factor is robust. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to repurpose globally than to reinvent robustly. We think we know that it is better to redefine interactively than to strategize perfectly. What does the industry jargon "wireless, scalable Total Quality Management" really mean? Think ultra-mega-bleeding-edge. The ability to synergize micro-virtually leads to the capacity to grow wirelessly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "schemas" really mean? We will reinvent the aptitude of initiatives to redefine. We realize that it is better to utilize dynamically than to orchestrate globally. The experiences factor is transparent. The real-time project management factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think ultra-nano-real-world. We will aggregate the capacity of out-of-the-box, intuitive niches to streamline. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not open-source. HorsePorn practically invented the term "implementation". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our co-branded transparent structuring but our aptitude to transform. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Without eyeballs, you will lack architectures. Think cross-media, dot-com. Think leading-edge, 24/7, back-end. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can deploy fiercely will (one day) be able to matrix courageously. The aptitude to evolve magnetically leads to the capacity to orchestrate robustly. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for regulating new supply-chains? Imagine a combination of Rails and FOAF.