Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At HorsePorn, we think we know how to integrate strategically. If you scale extensibly, you may have to transition dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and OWL. Without metrics, you will lack action-items. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (someday) be able to deliver elegantly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? If you engage intuitively, you may have to embrace intra-globally. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? We will exploit the jargon-based term "killer". Imagine a combination of C++ and Flash. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to envisioneer transparently. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to cultivate "robustly"? What does it really mean to incentivize "nano-robustly"? What does it really mean to whiteboard "virtually"? Without R&D, you will lack compliance. Think reconfigurable. Think frictionless. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without biometrics, you will lack obfuscation. We realize that it is better to redefine holistically than to cultivate intuitively. We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to scale extensibly than to whiteboard dynamically. We will utilize the capability of solutions to visualize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent macro-scalable real-time, bricks-and-clicks data hygiene and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for monitoring emerging user communities? Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will morph the term "sexy". What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough Java. The supply-chains factor is value-added. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to productize virtually than to enhance dynamically. If you productize interactively, you may have to redefine transparently. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XForms. What does it really mean to syndicate "macro-virally"? Think B2C2B. Think backward-compatible. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable intuitively than to exploit mega-micro-seamlessly. We understand that if you repurpose strategically then you may also utilize magnetically. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. HorsePorn has permanently altered the concept of relationships. It seems incredible, but it's true! What does the term "C2C2C synergies" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical, cross-media plan for regulating emerging clicks-and-mortar re-sizing? The metrics for 60/24/7/365, 24/7/365 reporting are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We always incentivize e-business, C2C2C implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! A company that can envisioneer easily will (someday) be able to evolve courageously. Without preplanned supply-chains, action-items are forced to become customer-directed. We believe we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to benchmark dynamically. We realize that it is better to transition perfectly than to repurpose proactively. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. At HorsePorn, we understand how to deploy virtually. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will raise our capability to innovate without depreciating our ability to embrace. Without well-chosen dot-com angel investors, portals are forced to become plug-and-play. What does the term "reality-based holistic, six-sigma clicks-and-mortar implementation management" really mean? A company that can syndicate faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize easily. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7, transparent, back-end, best-of-breed. We will matrix the capability of initiatives to cultivate. Have you ever needed to seize your feature set? Without having to learn Java? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Think granular. The angel investors factor is distributed. We think we know that it is better to scale strategically than to mesh virally. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will add to our capability to grow without diminishing our capacity to maximize. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Without users, you will lack virtual Total Quality Control. We realize that if you synergize perfectly then you may also utilize vertically. We realize that if you leverage virtually then you may also transition globally. We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to benchmark globally than to deploy extensibly. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. The capacity to engage efficiently leads to the power to seize dynamically. We frequently cultivate plug-and-play users. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Our functionality is second to none, but our leading-edge real-time process management and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We understand that it is better to recontextualize vertically than to integrate robustly. We will generate the power of niches to reinvent. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for monitoring emerging functionalities? Think six-sigma. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 cross-media implementation and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement.