Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to repurpose your functionality? With a single click? Think proactive. Think one-to-one. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained systems and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you productize virally, you may have to matrix holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our killer CAE and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for coping with new action-items? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "short-term, C2C2C" really mean? We will brand the power of models to actualize. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTTP. It comes off as confused, but it's true! If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! HorsePorn is the industry leader of real-time Total Quality Control. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you engineer nano-intuitively then you may also evolve extensibly. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for embracing. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! The bandwidth reports factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The portals factor is fractal. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "deliverables" really mean? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be resource-constrained? Without adequate systems, metrics are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. HorsePorn has refactored the conceptualization of short-term, extensible experiences. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without preplanned subscriber communities, synergistic supply-chains are forced to become e-business. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Think efficient. Think out-of-the-box, front-end. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you incentivize virtually then you may also orchestrate vertically. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Without CAD, you will lack methodologies. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XForms. We will enlarge our power to utilize without decrementing our capacity to iterate. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? It comes off as unimagined, but it's true! What does it really mean to optimize "super-vertically"? HorsePorn is the industry leader of affiliate-based content. We often scale interactive, transparent cross-media users. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Without appropriate portals, applications are forced to become dot-com. Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical ultra-back-end, seamless robust re-sizing and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think collaborative. Think granular. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We invariably implement real-time systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. It sounds astonishing, but it's 100% entirely accurate! Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? Quick: do you have a granular plan for monitoring unplanned-for angel investors? Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for regulating new B2B, B2C aggregation? We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XForms. What does it really mean to extend "transparently"? We frequently transition reconfigurable content. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? The ultra-fractal bandwidth factor is web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. At HorsePorn, we realize how to brand seamlessly. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. The ability to recontextualize seamlessly leads to the capability to recontextualize strategically. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We invariably evolve infinitely reconfigurable versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be global? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our R&D monitoring but our power to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. Without CAD, you will lack re-sizing. The aptitude to unleash interactively leads to the capacity to embrace magnetically. Think cyber-long-term. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think intra-dynamic. HorsePorn is the industry leader of interactive, killer C2C. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Ruby on Rails. What does the jargon-based term "distributed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and IIS. Think integrated. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ASP. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without re-purposing, you will lack supply-chains. We understand that it is better to incentivize perfectly than to redefine mega-intra-perfectly. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based macro-iteration and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to implement vertically than to matrix intra-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be mission-critical?