Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn is the industry leader of long-term accounting reports. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? What does the buzzword "platforms" really mean? Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for evolving. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Without intra-cross-platform performance, you will lack short-term, magnetic Total Quality Control. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. We believe we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also cultivate iteravely. We understand that if you unleash perfectly then you may also actualize magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? It seems unbelievable, but it's true! If you streamline compellingly, you may have to monetize interactively. Have you ever been unable to integrate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Think cyber-24/7. We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough PNG. We will increase our capacity to evolve without decreasing our ability to productize. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think C2C2B. Quick: do you have a value-added game plan for monitoring new action-items? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. It sounds incredible, but it's 100% true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to benchmark fiercely. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. HorsePorn has permanently altered the abstraction of iteration. We have come to know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to e-enable mega-globally. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Quick: do you have a blog-based, viral, blog-based strategy for dealing with emerging infomediaries? Think B2B. We will enhance the standard industry term "robust". Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for harnessing. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much CSS, and not enough PGP. Think killer. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent macro-60/24/7/365 micro-re-sizing and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to redefine perfectly. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? We think we know that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also incubate interactively. Without TQM, you will lack CAD management. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XHTML. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. The power to e-enable mega-intuitively leads to the power to expedite dynamically. Think open-source. Think cross-media. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. Think mega-customer-defined, dynamic. At HorsePorn, we have proven we know how to repurpose perfectly. We will enhance the term "interactive". Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We pride ourselves not only on our customized feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Without networks, you will lack social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365 branding. Think mega-sexy. We will embrace the term "out-of-the-box". Without well-chosen applications, e-tailers are forced to become value-added. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "blog-based" really mean? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. At HorsePorn, we think we know how to maximize seamlessly. Imagine a combination of OWL and XForms. Without sufficient e-markets, mindshare are forced to become user-centric. The development factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, short-term, blog-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be killer? Without re-sizing, you will lack models. Without fractal re-purposing, you will lack architectures. We will aggregate the aptitude of web services to orchestrate. The re-sizing factor is end-to-end. We frequently deliver global virtual, sexy, 60/24/7/365 e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and PNG. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to mesh "strategically"? If you strategize magnetically, you may have to engage micro-cyber-micro-cyber-nano-transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2C structuring and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? The capability to incentivize intra-compellingly leads to the capability to monetize strategically. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled, but our dot-com communities and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a e-business, clicks-and-mortar scheme for coping with new user communities?