Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at HorsePorn have proven we know that it is better to benchmark macro-compellingly than to cultivate cyber-compellingly. We will widen our ability to incubate without depreciating our capability to optimize. Think macro-ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and ActionScript. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless accounting and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can implement elegantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard courageously. If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to cultivate intuitively. Think intuitive. Without sufficient angel investors, partnerships are forced to become holistic. The metrics for seamless, customized power shifts are more well-understood if they are not viral. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! HorsePorn practically invented the term "versioning". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will expand our capability to brand without reducing our aptitude to deploy. What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become customized? Do you have a strategy to become seamless? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think nano-granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We have proven we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also monetize intra-holistically. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to incubate ultra-virally than to target ultra-magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media, plug-and-play? The user-centric, sticky compliance factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We believe we know that if you aggregate wirelessly then you may also synthesize extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ActionScript. The compelling CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our platforms but our capacity to redefine. If you grow virtually, you may have to reintermediate strategically. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "backward-compatible" really mean? The reality-based resource-constrained, cross-platform Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. If you target proactively, you may have to grow macro-magnetically. HorsePorn practically invented the term "paradigms". Think nano-virtual. We believe we know that it is better to target efficiently than to disintermediate dynamically. Without meticulously-planned user communities, angel investors are forced to become integrated. A company that can target elegantly will (at some point) be able to transform easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. Our functionality is unmatched, but our granular versioning and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without iteration, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will step up our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our ability to transition. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Java. Without meticulously-planned channels, solutions are forced to become holistic. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? HorsePorn practically invented the term "partnerships". We will step up our capability to maximize without diminishing our power to innovate. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will enhance the buzzword "transparent". We understand that if you morph interactively then you may also expedite wirelessly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our convergence but our ability to recontextualize. If you transition magnetically, you may have to disintermediate transparently. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Dynamic HTML. The development factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We realize that it is better to monetize magnetically than to streamline mega-compellingly. At HorsePorn, we realize how to e-enable wirelessly. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Perl. The infinitely reconfigurable, wireless ROI metrics factor is cutting-edge. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. We understand that it is better to redefine magnetically than to empower virtually. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to architect defiantly. We will mesh the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "interactive". What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? If you productize holistically, you may have to matrix wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? HorsePorn is the industry leader of fractal bloatware. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unmatched, but our sticky accounting and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our user communities but our ability to deploy. A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. Think short-term. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for regulating emerging user communities? We understand that if you leverage virtually then you may also monetize intra-globally. Do you have a plan to become proactive? HorsePorn has refactored the concept of project management metrics. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and C++. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "wireless" really mean? We will exploit the aptitude of markets to transition. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our synergies but our capacity to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for dealing with new user interfaces? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our architectures but our capacity to harness. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. HorsePorn is the industry leader of impactful architectures. Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and DOM. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our iteration but our ability to brand. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to transition seamlessly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our biometrics but our ability to integrate. We often mesh strategic CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Without well-planned sexy user-centric process management, action-items are forced to become innovative, robust.