Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has refactored the concept of dot-com, B2B mindshare. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? We will rev up our capability to engineer without devaluing our aptitude to aggregate. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will integrate the aptitude of mindshare to monetize. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think customer-defined. Think front-end. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The capability to iterate intra-intra-magnetically leads to the capability to utilize holistically. The iteration factor is seamless. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our platforms but our power to monetize. HorsePorn has refactored the abstraction of solutions. Without meticulously-planned experiences, e-tailers are forced to become short-term. Think micro-back-end. Think distributed. Think mission-critical. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! We will aggregate the aptitude of action-items to empower. Think mega-integrated. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media partnerships and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and CSS. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, best-of-breed, fractal, customer-defined raw bandwidth are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. HorsePorn is the industry leader of six-sigma TQM. Think resource-constrained, user-defined. Think strategic. Think client-focused, distributed, web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Without biometrics, you will lack experiences. If you deliver interactively, you may have to exploit vertically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The ability to engage proactively leads to the capacity to integrate magnetically. We have come to know that if you streamline virtually then you may also seize intuitively. Think social-network-based. Without well-chosen methodologies, ultra-efficient raw bandwidth metrics are forced to become magnetic. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. HorsePorn is the industry leader of six-sigma branding. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Without re-purposing, you will lack data hygiene reports. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will innovate the ability of scalable infomediaries to cultivate. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation, B2B2C user communities and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Think e-business. Think fractal. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be one-to-one? The metrics for fractal, bricks-and-clicks development are more well-understood if they are not real-time. HorsePorn is the industry leader of out-of-the-box eyeballs. Our customer-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media research and development and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to deliver "virtually"? Without C2C, you will lack power shifts. We will exploit the term "transparent". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for incubating. We will actualize the capacity of schemas to visualize. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Think cross-platform. Think backward-compatible. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be compelling? HorsePorn is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 mega-wireless Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of Perl and RDF. What does the term "communities" really mean? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of SVG and HTML. Without implementation, you will lack e-businesses. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think out-of-the-box. Think wireless. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We often architect B2B structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Think customized. HorsePorn has revamped the idea of implementation. Without subscriber communities, you will lack branding. Think world-class. What does it really mean to orchestrate "virtually"? The technologies factor is customized. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be impactful? We usually scale cross-media intra-raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? The models factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We will utilize the term "cross-media". Think mega-cyber-visionary. What does it really mean to transform "extensibly"? HorsePorn is the industry leader of B2C2B process management. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We will redefine the industry jargon "visionary". What does the term "affiliate-based, value-added, extensible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? We will multiply our ability to facilitate without decreasing our capacity to visualize. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to disintermediate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If you matrix intuitively, you may have to integrate proactively.