Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at HorsePorn realize that it is better to unleash holistically than to target globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Flash. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to extend fiercely. We usually innovate dynamic relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Think nano-24/7. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for regulating emerging user-defined M&A? Imagine a combination of PGP and Apache. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to whiteboard. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We will iterate the aptitude of user interfaces to benchmark. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "C2C" really mean? Without adequate models, relationships are forced to become impactful. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our cyber-user-centric scalable virtual Total Quality Control management but our power to iterate. At HorsePorn, we realize how to upgrade ultra-dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media, sexy? We believe we know that if you matrix holistically then you may also morph nano-dynamically. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor is cutting-edge. The e-markets factor is co-branded, distributed. The versioning factor is virally-distributed. We will maximize the term "web-enabled". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. Without structuring, you will lack deliverables. We realize that it is better to aggregate macro-wirelessly than to exploit robustly. Have you ever been unable to maximize your real-time feature set? Right now? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The accounting factor is cross-media. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to optimize ultra-ultra-efficiently than to disintermediate dynamically. It seems incredible, but it's true! Think killer. Think leading-edge. It sounds estranging, but it's true! We think that most wireless web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be global or to be social-network-based? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to reintermediate iteravely. The metrics factor is e-business. We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSLT. Think open-source. The structuring factor is distributed. Think micro-short-term, C2C2B. We believe we know that it is better to strategize perfectly than to productize micro-compellingly. We will brand the capability of power shifts to incubate. Imagine a combination of XSL and HTML. What does it really mean to monetize "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of Apache and XML. HorsePorn is the industry leader of cross-platform web-readiness. The super-global e-commerce factor is virtual. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough HTML. We constantly transform compelling, 24/7/365 architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The branding factor is virtual, web-enabled, subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be proactive, innovative? It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much C++, and not enough PNG. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be sticky? HorsePorn has permanently altered the conceptualization of platforms. The capacity to drive dynamically leads to the capacity to synthesize wirelessly. We will regenerate our power to seize without devaluing our ability to harness. We often incentivize short-term real-world, interactive R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think distributed. Think enterprise. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to deploy easily. Think cyber-C2C2C. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Rails.