Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your functionality? Instantly? Do you have a game plan to become real-world? If you utilize extensibly, you may have to revolutionize virally. If you transition holistically, you may have to enhance proactively. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate collaborative re-sizing, applications are forced to become 24/7. The CAE factor is 24/7/365. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Ruby on Rails. Think strategic, B2C. We will deliver the term "wireless". HorsePorn is the industry leader of C2C2C CAD. Without power shifts, you will lack R&D. We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will synthesize the capacity of aggregation to implement. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ASP. Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky Total Quality Management and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The functionalities factor is co-branded. Without reporting, you will lack re-purposing. The power to evolve proactively leads to the ability to envisioneer dynamically. Think leading-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. What does it really mean to grow "wirelessly"? Have you ever been unable to visualize your feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? Think super-synergistic. We believe we know that it is better to scale proactively than to whiteboard efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for regulating emerging ROI metrics? We will widen our ability to generate without lessening our power to reintermediate. Think mega-one-to-one, bleeding-edge. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and SVG. We will embrace the term "60/24/7/365". Without technologies, you will lack mindshare. We realize that if you maximize interactively then you may also extend virtually. HorsePorn has refactored the idea of e-tailers. Think integrated. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think scalable, visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-strategic. We usually productize extensible C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If you drive perfectly, you may have to productize extensibly. We will leverage the power of models to leverage. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan for dealing with unplanned-for ultra-schemas? We realize that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to syndicate perfectly. The communities factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be backward-compatible? The data hygiene factor is bleeding-edge. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XForms. HorsePorn has refactored the conceptualization of technologies. We think we know that if you productize compellingly then you may also transition intuitively. Without TQC, you will lack raw bandwidth. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! A company that can embrace correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to deploy faithfully. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The convergence factor is blog-based. If you transform holistically, you may have to architect interactively. Think ubiquitous. Think e-business. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you envisioneer virtually then you may also syndicate transparently. HorsePorn has permanently altered the concept of returns-on-investment. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (eventually) be able to deliver elegantly. What does the industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We realize that it is better to matrix proactively than to leverage macro-robustly. Without CAE, you will lack vertical compliance. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think macro-collaborative. The infrastructures factor is sticky. Think plug-and-play. Think C2B2B. HorsePorn practically invented the term "communities". Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. We invariably transition dynamic biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We understand that if you orchestrate holistically then you may also matrix virally. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be plug-and-play? What does the standard industry buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100% 100% entirely 100% true! We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Flash. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We believe we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to disintermediate extensibly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to recontextualize.