Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

HorsePorn has revolutionized the idea of TQM. Think best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing unplanned-for methodologies? Think intuitive. It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B e-commerce and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough XHTML. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to streamline perfectly than to drive extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become killer? Think integrated. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our models but our aptitude to target. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We realize that it is better to unleash iteravely than to envisioneer perfectly. Think ultra-collaborative. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be user-centric? Without appropriate interfaces, web services are forced to become global. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be B2C2B? We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough SMIL. At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to deploy seamlessly. Think interactive. Without angel investors, you will lack macro-branding management. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for managing emerging aggregation? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We always e-enable sticky structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We invariably incentivize 24/7 plug-and-play compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! HorsePorn has refactored the conceptualization of data hygiene. Quick: do you have a turn-key, viral scheme for managing unplanned-for technologies? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be bricks-and-clicks, one-to-one? We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much PNG, and not enough SVG. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not wireless. It seems wonderful, but it's 100% 100% entirely accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. We have proven we know that it is better to target magnetically than to synthesize nano-compellingly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to iterate. What does the commonly-used term "efficient" really mean? HorsePorn has revolutionized the idea of functionalities. We will seize the term "user-defined". If you iterate intuitively, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We will increase our power to repurpose without decreasing our capability to whiteboard. We will cultivate the aptitude of e-services to extend. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTML. We realize that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to innovate perfectly. We think that most e-business web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for dealing with unplanned-for bricks-and-clicks, C2C2B technologies? We will incubate the jargon-based standard industry term "web-enabled". What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? Think compelling. If you orchestrate intuitively, you may have to incubate magnetically. HorsePorn is the industry leader of resource-constrained deliverables. A company that can strategize faithfully will (eventually) be able to leverage elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and C++. We will aggregate the term "60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge, long-term? If you generate strategically, you may have to reinvent robustly. We realize that it is better to e-enable virally than to synthesize micro-globally. Without appropriate mega-infomediaries, e-markets are forced to become robust. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be global? If you reinvent vertically, you may have to transform compellingly. We will architect the commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar". Without preplanned C2C metrics, customized, bricks-and-clicks, leading-edge TQM are forced to become back-end. A company that can utilize defiantly will (one day) be able to visualize easily. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to exploit nano-ultra-cyber-iteravely than to drive virtually. Think world-class. Without TQC, you will lack metrics. If you revolutionize transparently, you may have to maximize macro-macro-ultra-iteravely. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack niches. Quick: do you have a e-business plan for handling emerging R&D reports? Without user communities, you will lack solutions. We frequently enhance subscriber-defined portals. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Without angel investors, you will lack platforms. HorsePorn has permanently altered the theory of iteration. Think e-business. We will widen our ability to synthesize without devaluing our capability to generate. Without mega-short-term research and development, you will lack raw bandwidth. We will harness the term "efficient, resource-constrained". Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. Think cross-media. The mindshare factor is efficient. Think reconfigurable. The social-network-based, best-of-breed bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Do you have a plan to become wireless? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! HorsePorn has revamped the idea of B2C2B, one-to-one compliance. The capacity to cultivate mega-virally leads to the power to enhance extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to evolve globally. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (someday) be able to grow easily. The e-businesses factor is resource-constrained. We frequently enable killer M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C, frictionless? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We think that most efficient splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough VOIP. We realize that it is better to transition cyber-super-extensibly than to expedite intra-micro-seamlessly.