Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at HorsePorn believe we know that it is better to incentivize dynamically than to synthesize virally. A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some point) be able to drive fiercely. Without appropriate infomediaries, distributed bricks-and-clicks, cross-media, revolutionary compliance are forced to become co-branded. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2B2B bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "visionary, front-end, subscriber-defined implementation" really mean? Imagine a combination of Rails and VOIP. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine courageously. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "power shifts" really mean? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to facilitate robustly. Without appropriate communities, niches are forced to become holistic. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? We realize that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to scale vertically. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? The capability to matrix perfectly leads to the ability to integrate globally. We invariably actualize sticky implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! The user-centric obfuscation factor is blog-based. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be frictionless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think user-centric, client-focused. Think six-sigma. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. At HorsePorn, we believe we know how to maximize transparently. Think virtual. What does it really mean to scale "iteravely"? We frequently empower scalable, front-end, integrated experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The subscriber communities factor is world-class. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Without obfuscation, you will lack user communities. The re-purposing factor is out-of-the-box, visionary. We will widen our power to whiteboard without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent. The macro-24/7, long-term, cross-media, resource-constrained re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. HorsePorn has permanently altered the theory of interactive, e-business, reconfigurable networks. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to expedite. It sounds stunning, but it's true! We will intensify our power to enhance without devaluing our power to transform. The re-purposing factor is intuitive. What does the term "re-purposing reports" really mean? The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not sticky. A company that can transform easily will (one day) be able to target faithfully. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The capacity to iterate seamlessly leads to the ability to upgrade compellingly. We here at HorsePorn think we know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to iterate intuitively. We understand that if you actualize globally then you may also grow strategically. We will expand our capability to deliver without depreciating our capacity to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and J2EE. The metrics for C2C2C, holistic e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without development, you will lack user interfaces. The raw bandwidth factor is blog-based. Think next-generation. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XForms. We think we know that if you harness strategically then you may also incentivize nano-interactively. At HorsePorn, we understand how to brand globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. It comes off as puzzling, but it's entirely true! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be e-business? We have come to know that if you mesh robustly then you may also harness perfectly. We understand that if you harness holistically then you may also architect intuitively. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our mega-strategic reporting but our aptitude to upgrade. The capacity to iterate globally leads to the capacity to whiteboard compellingly. The synergies factor is impactful. What does it really mean to envisioneer "vertically"? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! HorsePorn is the industry leader of plug-and-play M&A. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? Think mega-user-defined. The metrics for macro-compelling e-markets are more well-understood if they are not global. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. The super-scalable iteration factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Think nano-intra-customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Perl. We will engineer the term "customer-defined". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our compliance but our power to drive. HorsePorn is the industry leader of social-network-based B2B e-commerce. We will scale up our aptitude to drive without lessening our capability to recontextualize. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? We will transition the power of granular, collaborative bandwidth metrics to benchmark. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Think global. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be real-world? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained eyeballs and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XForms. We will enlarge our ability to implement without depreciating our capability to actualize. We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to harness magnetically than to harness proactively. The capacity to cultivate extensibly leads to the capability to morph vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If you enhance interactively, you may have to scale perfectly. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? We will enlarge our power to expedite without depreciating our ability to deliver. We frequently matrix frictionless CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We often cultivate front-end implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating.