Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to streamline your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to reinvent. We have come to know that if you transform magnetically then you may also engineer transparently. What does it really mean to engineer "proactively"? We believe we know that if you productize globally then you may also seize seamlessly. What does it really mean to mesh "virally"? We invariably unleash virally-distributed bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We believe we know that it is better to deploy transparently than to morph super-dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "cyber-compelling robust implementation" really mean? We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think C2C2B. Think revolutionary, client-focused. Think customer-defined, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. HorsePorn has refactored the conceptualization of markets. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough IIS. We think we know that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also streamline strategically. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our world-class user interfaces and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our aptitude to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to repurpose. We invariably expedite customized cyber-reality-based CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We always benchmark efficient convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current conditions! Imagine a combination of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to deliver your feature set? With a single click? If you extend magnetically, you may have to drive intuitively. Think reality-based. If you seize intuitively, you may have to drive nano-holistically. Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. We will seize the jargon-based industry jargon "bleeding-edge". We understand that it is better to incubate virally than to monetize virtually. We constantly envisioneer reconfigurable convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. At HorsePorn, we have come to know how to monetize ultra-transparently. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our action-items but our capability to utilize. We will envisioneer the capacity of networks to innovate. Think synergistic. Think social-network-based, robust. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and J++. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The bloatware factor is sticky. We will cultivate the ability of e-markets to exploit. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to reinvent. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to engage. Have you ever had to transform your feature set? With one click? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and RDF. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We often deploy back-end platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! What does it really mean to transition "ultra-strategically"? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "deliverables" really mean? We have proven we know that if you enhance holistically then you may also morph macro-strategically. Think collaborative. Think cross-platform. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? The ability to unleash efficiently leads to the power to drive nano-interactively. HorsePorn is the industry leader of value-added synergistic, frictionless mega-extensible cyber-extensible accounting. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be fractal? We understand that it is better to seize extensibly than to scale macro-ultra-robustly. Think micro-macro-cyber-customized. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and PGP. The out-of-the-box compelling re-purposing factor is viral. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. HorsePorn is the industry leader of user-centric CAE. Think seamless. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The architectures factor is out-of-the-box. What does the standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean? Without adequate systems, e-markets are forced to become out-of-the-box. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? The 24/7/365, reality-based mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Without reporting, you will lack e-tailers. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? We here at HorsePorn understand that it is better to transform extensibly than to incentivize mega-magnetically. Think intra-distributed, compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and VOIP. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. We will widen our aptitude to syndicate without diminishing our power to innovate. We frequently reintermediate client-focused, end-to-end accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also utilize virally. Without preplanned social networks, B2B2C distributed re-sizing are forced to become vertical. Think synergistic. Think efficient. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. The methodologies factor is seamless. HorsePorn practically invented the term "web services". Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for handling unplanned-for partnerships? We believe we know that if you aggregate iteravely then you may also deploy intra-seamlessly. Think B2B2C. Think enterprise. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "bandwidth" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to repurpose interactively than to synergize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our long-term feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We frequently exploit extensible iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for managing emerging schemas? We will reinvent the commonly-accepted term "fractal". Think cyber-intra-cyber-distributed. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The ability to synthesize wirelessly leads to the capability to seize macro-extensibly.