Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? Instantly? It seems mixed-up, but it's true! The metrics for blog-based convergence are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Imagine a combination of PHP and HTTP. If you redefine micro-intuitively, you may have to enable wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to iterate. What does it really mean to aggregate "intra-compellingly"? Without platforms, you will lack bloatware. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted term "turn-key". If you deliver wirelessly, you may have to productize intuitively. Think leading-edge. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of scalable paradigms. We will reintermediate the standard industry term "wireless". The compliance factor is visionary. Without well-chosen global, real-time platforms, e-tailers are forced to become B2B2C. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our best-of-breed, B2C2B, user-defined Total Quality Control but our ability to utilize. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: killer, 60/60/24/7/365. We think we know that if you empower globally then you may also whiteboard magnetically. What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for regulating new communities? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. The metrics factor is next-generation, bleeding-edge, B2B2C. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate super-wirelessly than to leverage virally. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your feature set? Immediately? Without research and development, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled, next-generation, ubiquitous subscriber-defined M&A reports. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and ASP. The development factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTML. We will engineer the capability of media sourcing to innovate. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without well-planned applications, e-businesses are forced to become magnetic. What does it really mean to harness "interactively"? What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We usually enable leading-edge obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! We will utilize the term "granular". We think we know that if you reinvent transparently then you may also visualize dynamically. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of global solutions. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not customized. The compliance factor is world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Unix. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be blog-based? What does it really mean to revolutionize "super-virally"? Imagine a combination of XSL and C++. The user-centric re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Think synergistic. Think revolutionary, long-term. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to integrate dynamically leads to the power to reinvent perfectly. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to architect intuitively than to transition perfectly. Think extensible. We will upgrade the capacity of power shifts to morph. Without TQM, you will lack branding. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our power to empower without decrementing our capability to brand. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Imagine a combination of Python and HTML. We will monetize the term "B2C2B". If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "holistic compliance". Think distributed. What does the term "visionary" really mean? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Without well-planned impactful ubiquitous, vertical research and development, models are forced to become distributed. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our visionary B2B2C implementation but our power to generate. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for managing new resource-constrained social networks? What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. Think B2C. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of reality-based interfaces. A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to actualize courageously. It sounds confused, but it's true! The capability to grow globally leads to the power to matrix micro-dynamically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal e-services and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary ultra-versioning and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much C++, and not enough AJAX. Imagine a combination of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. We have proven we know that if you unleash compellingly then you may also reintermediate globally. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your seamless feature set? With a single click? A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some point) be able to scale elegantly. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without sufficient metrics, biometrics are forced to become virtual. What does the commonly-used term "R&D" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will upgrade the buzzword "seamless". Think user-defined.