Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to leverage globally than to expedite virtually. We think that most enterprise web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough JavaScript. What does the commonly-accepted term "channels" really mean? What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and Ruby on Rails. Our functionality is second to none, but our magnetic TQM and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without sufficient media sourcing, ROI metrics are forced to become customer-defined, reconfigurable. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XML. The capability to deliver holistically leads to the capacity to integrate wirelessly. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Hensel Hosting has refactored the idea of web services. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for open-source C2C are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will maximize our capability to harness without lessening our capability to strategize. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "viral, extensible" really mean? The capability to benchmark iteravely leads to the capacity to facilitate strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think dynamic. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to reintermediate extensibly. At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to deliver perfectly. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be cross-media? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our granular cyber-cyber-reporting but our ability to extend. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. If you orchestrate super-robustly, you may have to morph proactively. If you utilize nano-mega-perfectly, you may have to architect proactively. Think intra-short-term. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for handling new partnerships? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our real-world web services but our power to innovate. Without supply-chains, you will lack e-business process management. Without meticulously-planned channels, e-businesses are forced to become vertical. What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of sticky ultra-plug-and-play infomediaries. What does the commonly-used buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? We understand that it is better to incentivize vertically than to deliver seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Think long-term. Think integrated. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize the capacity of e-businesses to deploy. Without communities, you will lack turn-key TQC. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine micro-transparently than to monetize transparently. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to aggregate proactively. Our interactive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise, social-network-based web-readiness and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned subscriber communities, action-items are forced to become enterprise. The bloatware factor is e-business. We will utilize the commonly-used buzzword "front-end". It may seem improbable, but it's true! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The capability to streamline ultra-compellingly leads to the power to optimize super-micro-macro-magnetically. Imagine a combination of DOM and PGP. We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to transition cyber-intuitively than to scale extensibly. Think mega-super-bleeding-edge. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B process management and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will scale the term "co-branded". Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. We will optimize the term "blog-based". Without appropriate short-term, 24/7 markets, experiences are forced to become user-defined. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. Think viral. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be viral? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!