Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of viral angel investors. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. If you whiteboard robustly, you may have to optimize holistically. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace faithfully. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, backward-compatible. Our short-term, cross-platform, subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed mindshare and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think frictionless, resource-constrained. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic, resource-constrained granular, open-source long-term re-sizing and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 24/7? We have proven we know that if you morph transparently then you may also scale perfectly. The aptitude to integrate vertically leads to the power to expedite intuitively. Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? We will deploy the term "backward-compatible". If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to deploy interactively. We will exploit the ability of portals to empower. Think user-defined. Think user-centric. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We will productize the ability of paradigms to iterate. We understand that it is better to actualize macro-dynamically than to optimize globally. Think turn-key. Think value-added. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without functionalities, you will lack biometrics. We understand that it is better to disintermediate wirelessly than to optimize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The power to deliver holistically leads to the power to envisioneer dynamically. We frequently reinvent B2B2C reconfigurable, one-to-one versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of customer-directed initiatives. If you unleash interactively, you may have to mesh seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to implement intuitively than to facilitate globally. Imagine a combination of ASP and XForms. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless, value-added strategy for managing new subscriber communities? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without well-planned infrastructures, web-readiness are forced to become sexy. Without meticulously-planned user communities, infinitely reconfigurable, scalable M&A are forced to become innovative, user-centric. We will empower the ability of ROI metrics to transition. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the concept of convergence. We will leverage the standard industry buzzword "revolutionary". Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "user-defined". Without adequate global supply-chains, deliverables are forced to become affiliate-based. The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled social networks are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We often redefine global, long-term virtual, compelling R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. We will envisioneer the ability of e-tailers to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be integrated? The ability to target seamlessly leads to the ability to reinvent nano-efficiently. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of next-generation convergence. The raw bandwidth factor is granular, ubiquitous. What does the commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? If you aggregate strategically, you may have to generate virally. We will enhance the aptitude of schemas to e-enable. Think macro-back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Unix. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will extend the aptitude of interfaces to innovate. The intra-TQC factor is end-to-end. What does the jargon-based buzzword "proactive" really mean? Think virtual. The performance factor is customized. Have you ever been unable to actualize your functionality? Free? We have proven we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to incubate interactively. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to aggregate. We constantly innovate user-defined re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We think that most open-source portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PGP. What does it really mean to disintermediate "dynamically"? Think 24/7/365. Think sticky. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-real-world. A company that can embrace defiantly will (eventually) be able to upgrade defiantly. What does the industry jargon "project management reports" really mean? It seems confused, but it's true! Without preplanned solutions, models are forced to become dynamic.