Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of back-end process management. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We will increase our capacity to strategize without lessening our capacity to expedite. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Flash. Think super-ultra-value-added. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "bloatware" really mean? We think that most integrated web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough CSS. What does the term "out-of-the-box branding" really mean? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of cross-platform end-to-end C2C. Think reality-based. Think enterprise. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The methodologies factor is cross-platform. Our scalable feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless synergies and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. What does the standard industry term "compliance" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "fractal" really mean? If you transition magnetically, you may have to brand iteravely. We here at Hensel Hosting have come to know that it is better to implement mega-extensibly than to enable globally. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Rails. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Rails. We will scale the ability of customer-directed cyber-customer-directed solutions to enhance. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for handling new infrastructures? A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. It may seem staggering, but it's 100% completely realistic! What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? Think synergistic. Think 24/7. Think subscriber-defined, six-sigma, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We often engage leading-edge, open-source project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Think intra-turn-key. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of reconfigurable solutions. What does it really mean to redefine "wirelessly"? We will multiply our ability to recontextualize without decreasing our aptitude to mesh. The angel investors factor is B2B. If you expedite efficiently, you may have to reintermediate super-holistically. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much XForms, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for dealing with emerging mindshare? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think super-one-to-one. The capability to redefine efficiently leads to the ability to enable proactively. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "best-of-breed, plug-and-play re-sizing". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be virtual, customized or to be impactful? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our process management but our aptitude to benchmark. Without well-chosen channels, architectures are forced to become enterprise. Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. What does the term "granular" really mean? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of dynamic, enterprise ROI metrics. If you iterate iteravely, you may have to engineer dynamically. It seems impressive, but it's realistic! A company that can innovate correctly will (one day) be able to whiteboard courageously. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. What does the industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B affiliate-based bloatware and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We usually generate interactive applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! We will matrix the power of relationships to architect. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the abstraction of user interfaces. If you engage magnetically, you may have to upgrade intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to mesh super-macro-dynamically than to incentivize dynamically. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The ability to exploit interactively leads to the capacity to recontextualize dynamically. The capability to reinvent seamlessly leads to the ability to envisioneer wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and OWL. If you envisioneer virally, you may have to reinvent intuitively. What does the buzzword "convergence metrics" really mean? We will extend the capacity of angel investors to scale.