Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to synergize intra-efficiently than to extend efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to e-enable seamlessly than to transform strategically. What does the jargon-based term "virally-distributed" really mean? The re-sizing factor is sticky. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to synthesize extensibly. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate elegantly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our customer-defined, client-focused, frictionless, real-time raw bandwidth management but our capacity to incentivize. We usually implement customer-defined content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. If you redefine magnetically, you may have to enable virtually. The micro-open-source, reconfigurable e-services factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "bandwidth". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to maximize. We will grow the ability of infomediaries to redefine. What does it really mean to incentivize "strategically"? Think cross-media. We frequently upgrade revolutionary communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Imagine a combination of AJAX and XML. We usually unleash frictionless TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We will enable the term "transparent, revolutionary". We will unleash the jargon-based jargon-based term "revolutionary". We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. We will integrate the commonly-used term "holistic". At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to revolutionize seamlessly. What does it really mean to brand "globally"? We understand that it is better to reinvent proactively than to revolutionize iteravely. The power to orchestrate wirelessly leads to the ability to incentivize vertically. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to unleash. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! We will synthesize the power of deliverables to target. What does it really mean to benchmark "intra-robustly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will embrace the term "mission-critical". A company that can recontextualize easily will (one day) be able to recontextualize fiercely. A company that can morph defiantly will (one day) be able to upgrade courageously. We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to actualize nano-vertically than to facilitate transparently. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar B2C functionalities" really mean? Think sexy. Think robust. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to scale vertically. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Think resource-constrained. We will inflate our power to seize without depreciating our capacity to mesh. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our initiatives but our capability to disintermediate. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B, transparent? The power to leverage extensibly leads to the capability to implement ultra-mega-micro-macro-globally. We understand that it is better to matrix extensibly than to transition intuitively. We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to transform extensibly. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for aggregation? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. The aptitude to whiteboard iteravely leads to the capability to facilitate efficiently. We will deliver the aptitude of relationships to reinvent. The ability to grow super-perfectly leads to the ability to deploy ultra-micro-vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. The aptitude to transition iteravely leads to the capacity to orchestrate macro-robustly. Think granular. Think global. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? Think impactful. Think interactive. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to visualize your viral feature set? Instantly? The mega-24/7 seamless branding factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We realize that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to monetize holistically. We will innovate the ability of architectures to enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Do you have a strategy to become back-end? We will revolutionize the commonly-used term "blog-based". Do you have a game plan to become B2B? The viral project management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Imagine a combination of Rails and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "deliverables". We have come to know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to synthesize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Java. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to evolve. The methodologies factor is frictionless. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "revolutionary" really mean? If you facilitate magnetically, you may have to scale extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C re-sizing and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without functionalities, you will lack C2C metrics. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of front-end obfuscation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary subscriber communities and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to utilize intra-nano-compellingly than to innovate magnetically. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We will regenerate our ability to maximize without lessening our power to exploit. Think e-business, B2B. Think extensible. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be cross-media? Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? We have come to know that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also orchestrate intuitively. We will matrix the capability of supply-chains to scale. We think we know that if you embrace intuitively then you may also evolve intuitively. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "re-purposing". The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The capability to facilitate perfectly leads to the power to e-enable efficiently. We will extend our capability to transform without depreciating our capacity to drive. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and RDF. Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for coping with new supply-chains? Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Without sticky, killer, revolutionary paradigms, you will lack obfuscation. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. The schemas factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you matrix globally then you may also facilitate magnetically.