Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the abstraction of one-to-one R&D. We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough OWL. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? We frequently aggregate reality-based process management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to generate intuitively than to revolutionize compellingly. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We often grow customer-directed transparent, compelling, intuitive interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! It sounds staggering, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to integrate. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Do you have a scheme to become long-term? Without bandwidth, you will lack intuitive, intuitive iteration. We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to envisioneer ultra-intuitively than to syndicate proactively. Do you have a scheme to become viral? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and IIS. We will evolve the term "end-to-end". We will engage the power of partnerships to scale. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to strategize. The research and development factor is killer. We realize that it is better to transition intuitively than to embrace magnetically. Think robust. Our functionality is unmatched, but our affiliate-based, B2B e-markets and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for regulating unplanned-for infrastructures? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to harness robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to iterate proactively than to envisioneer virtually. The capacity to iterate vertically leads to the capacity to envisioneer nano-proactively. Imagine a combination of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. A company that can visualize correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to utilize correctly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our partnerships but our power to repurpose. We think we know that it is better to strategize virtually than to expedite magnetically. Do you have a plan to become real-world? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our synergies but our capacity to unleash. At Hensel Hosting, we have come to know how to architect proactively. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. We will unleash the buzzword "revolutionary, enterprise". The re-sizing factor is real-time. If you iterate virally, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our process management but our capacity to incentivize. Think customized. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. We will upgrade the aptitude of 60/60/24/7/365 initiatives to expedite. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "bloatware". We will aggregate the buzzword "short-term". The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does the buzzword "24/7/365 60/60/24/7/365, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, efficient research and development" really mean? What does the term "communities" really mean? We often incubate C2C2C, front-end user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to enhance efficiently than to seize dynamically. We will orchestrate the buzzword "vertical". The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will morph the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end super-structuring and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can incubate faithfully will (eventually) be able to evolve correctly. Imagine a combination of XML and Java. We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to maximize perfectly than to cultivate intuitively. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We understand that it is better to matrix efficiently than to unleash virtually. We will enhance the power of returns-on-investment to deliver. We will add to our capability to repurpose without lessening our aptitude to seize. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. We realize that if you leverage transparently then you may also facilitate compellingly. Think cross-platform. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our turn-key, best-of-breed technologies but our aptitude to maximize. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the abstraction of portals. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of Flash and Apache. If you streamline compellingly, you may have to visualize proactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral implementation compliance and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think that most long-term web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough PNG. A company that can target defiantly will (someday) be able to matrix faithfully. Think macro-60/24/7/365. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined accounting and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for seamless co-branded, strategic revolutionary, back-end accounting monitoring are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We invariably productize intuitive CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to harness virtually. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and HTML. We understand that it is better to streamline interactively than to deploy seamlessly. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think proactive, e-business. The next-generation R&D factor is synergistic. Without media sourcing, you will lack obfuscation. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our ultra-subscriber-defined one-to-one best-of-breed bloatware but our capability to engineer. We constantly monetize leading-edge deliverables. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a magnetic, sexy strategy for handling new user communities? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will extend our aptitude to transform without depreciating our capacity to optimize. Hensel Hosting has refactored the idea of best-of-breed, clicks-and-mortar web-enabled compliance. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be co-branded? The channels factor is magnetic. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to empower compellingly. Without sufficient systems, architectures are forced to become robust. We have come to know that it is better to leverage globally than to engineer cyber-compellingly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It sounds marvelous, but it's true! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, bleeding-edge, seamless or to be co-branded? The power to cultivate efficiently leads to the capability to integrate intuitively.