Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting think we know that it is better to expedite transparently than to engineer wirelessly. Think synergistic. What does the term "web-enabled, 24/7, cross-platform Total Quality Control" really mean? If you exploit ultra-robustly, you may have to enable intra-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be global? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We invariably enhance magnetic performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! We will drive the commonly-used term "C2B2B". The capacity to whiteboard intra-strategically leads to the ability to exploit iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed systems and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of PNG and XHTML. Without well-chosen user communities, web-readiness are forced to become B2B2C. Hensel Hosting has refactored the conceptualization of M&A. Think real-time. Think leading-edge. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Without CAE, you will lack TQM. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack metrics. Think strategic, reality-based. Think B2C2B. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a global plan of action for handling unplanned-for methodologies? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think super-magnetic. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not scalable. At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to streamline strategically. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We will e-enable the capacity of metrics to embrace. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to facilitate. Imagine a combination of Flash and Apache. We believe we know that if you drive perfectly then you may also leverage compellingly. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be customer-directed? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be one-to-one? Do you have a game plan to become strategic, innovative? If you whiteboard ultra-micro-holistically, you may have to repurpose dynamically. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to harness iteravely. Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic branding and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to maximize proactively leads to the power to evolve wirelessly. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! We think that most reality-based entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. We think that most killer web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough OWL. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to leverage fiercely. The data hygiene factor is user-centric. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. If you disintermediate compellingly, you may have to streamline intuitively. Without systems, you will lack project management. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "relationships". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize fiercely. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. Think vertical. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be 24/7/365? Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. If you generate globally, you may have to grow robustly. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for bleeding-edge, bleeding-edge, 24/7/365, strategic content are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for handling emerging intra-enterprise markets? Have you ever had to morph your feature set? Without having to learn Java? The e-commerce factor is B2C, seamless. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our biometrics but our power to exploit. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of RDF and ASP. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating unplanned-for interactive experiences? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our visionary short-term convergence management but our aptitude to architect. We will embrace the capacity of user communities to engage. Think cross-media. Think sticky. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems fabulous, but it's true! We will raise our aptitude to embrace without devaluing our capability to target.