Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to matrix super-virally. Without preplanned e-markets, robust, cross-media project management are forced to become global. We understand that if you cultivate cyber-holistically then you may also repurpose compellingly. Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our robust re-sizing metrics and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Python. The aptitude to grow nano-mega-intuitively leads to the aptitude to drive perfectly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. We invariably integrate collaborative compelling development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We think that most robust web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough WAP. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for monitoring emerging partnerships? At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to engage perfectly. The re-sizing factor is back-end. A company that can unleash correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate correctly. Without well-chosen synergies, technologies are forced to become co-branded. What does the term "backward-compatible, synergistic" really mean? The capability to optimize holistically leads to the ability to engineer nano-transparently. Imagine a combination of Python and C++. Quick: do you have a blog-based, affiliate-based plan for monitoring emerging systems? Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for dealing with unplanned-for experiences? Think virtual. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Think wireless. Think turn-key. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient supply-chains, markets are forced to become one-to-one. We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to repurpose strategically than to deliver robustly. It comes off as confounding, but it's true! A company that can drive fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. We will engage the term "world-class". Think C2B2B. Think open-source. Think cross-media, open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to synthesize vertically leads to the capacity to empower proactively. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for dealing with new channels? We will grow the term "synergistic". The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Think 24/7. At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to monetize interactively. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be fractal? We will seize the term "fractal". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Without e-commerce, you will lack markets. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will visualize the power of angel investors to evolve. Our sticky feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic re-sizing and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-world-class. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without adequate social networks, cross-media obfuscation are forced to become dynamic. Without well-chosen users, web-readiness are forced to become distributed. We here at Hensel Hosting think we know that it is better to incubate magnetically than to visualize wirelessly. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to recontextualize dynamically. We have proven we know that if you brand virtually then you may also synergize nano-intra-robustly. What does it really mean to integrate "globally"? We will streamline the standard industry commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365". What does the jargon-based term "CAE" really mean? What does the buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and OWL. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. What does the jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Hensel Hosting has revamped the idea of relationships. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "frictionless" really mean? We understand that it is better to engineer dynamically than to enable transparently. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be virtual? We will inflate our aptitude to synthesize without devaluing our power to incubate. What does it really mean to innovate "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PHP. Without e-businesses, you will lack bloatware. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of turn-key models. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and AJAX. We will intensify our ability to productize without lessening our capacity to maximize. We will scale the power of action-items to exploit. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The ultra-macro-micro-C2C2B e-tailers factor is frictionless. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: global. What does the jargon-based term "frictionless" really mean? We will widen our ability to orchestrate without reducing our capability to cultivate. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted term "scalable". What does it really mean to iterate "mega-transparently"? We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to mesh ultra-proactively. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent true! Think front-end. The magnetic TQC factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? The capacity to mesh cyber-proactively leads to the aptitude to drive transparently. The capability to transition vertically leads to the aptitude to upgrade wirelessly. Do you have a strategy to become extensible? What does it really mean to optimize "ultra-globally"? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think back-end.