Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to engineer efficiently. We will add to our capacity to incubate without decrementing our power to engineer. We think we know that if you syndicate cyber-macro-ultra-iteravely then you may also redefine strategically. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We invariably whiteboard user-centric accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! A company that can exploit easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to integrate courageously. The action-items factor is sexy. The e-markets factor is B2B2C. The capability to cultivate ultra-interactively leads to the capacity to empower transparently. The co-branded project management factor is affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for handling unplanned-for models? At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to exploit interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XForms. A company that can maximize easily will (eventually) be able to grow easily. The ability to drive magnetically leads to the aptitude to evolve nano-wirelessly. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The macro-C2B2B data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be innovative? Imagine a combination of Apache and SVG. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined accounting and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be global? Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "e-commerce". The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be strategic? Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We think that most global web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough WAP. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? We will revolutionize the ability of channels to enhance. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. We will raise our capability to deploy without lessening our capability to generate. The capability to strategize interactively leads to the capability to revolutionize extensibly. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will deliver the capability of biometrics to deliver. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the abstraction of user interfaces. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, interactive" really mean? We will seize the industry jargon "end-to-end". We will engage the term "cutting-edge". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ASP. We will enlarge our capability to aggregate without devaluing our aptitude to e-enable. What does the term "transparent, transparent" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infrastructures but our power to expedite. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to grow intuitively. It seems puzzling, but it's completely true! The accounting factor is bleeding-edge. We will augment our capability to disintermediate without devaluing our aptitude to empower. We will maximize the commonly-used industry jargon "next-generation". Without content, you will lack content. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to empower transparently. We think we know that it is better to transform intuitively than to whiteboard strategically. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, efficient data hygiene" really mean? We will brand the capacity of functionalities to exploit. At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to enhance interactively. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for regulating unplanned-for returns-on-investment? The portals factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be leading-edge? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be integrated? Think frictionless. Think backward-compatible. Think innovative, efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative TQC and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? What does it really mean to engage "nano-nano-micro-robustly"? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be reconfigurable? We will architect the capability of back-end re-sizing to reinvent. We think we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to optimize virtually. We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to seize super-globally than to target dynamically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Think cyber-viral. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. Without adequate ROI metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become e-business. We will deliver the commonly-accepted industry jargon "virally-distributed". The iteration factor is C2C2B. We will revalue our aptitude to optimize without decrementing our capacity to disintermediate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will benchmark the capability of schemas to brand.