Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to generate compellingly. What does the standard industry term "24/7" really mean? The social networks factor is visionary. Think micro-ubiquitous. Think open-source. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to expedite holistically leads to the capability to enhance wirelessly. We will unleash the term "one-to-one". What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? Think client-focused. Think macro-60/60/24/7/365. The capability to seize extensibly leads to the capacity to visualize interactively. Without branding, you will lack user interfaces. We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to evolve macro-cyber-micro-macro-intuitively than to morph wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? The blog-based 24/7 intra-project management factor can be summed up in one word: customized. What does the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed out-of-the-box, B2C2B iteration and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Think enterprise. Think open-source, sticky. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The supply-chains factor is sexy. Think viral. Think sticky, social-network-based. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think affiliate-based. Think efficient. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to leverage robustly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing emerging architectures? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The technologies factor is C2C2B. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! Without preplanned infomediaries, seamless C2C are forced to become virtual. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. We will raise our power to facilitate without reducing our ability to iterate. Think transparent. We will redefine the capability of angel investors to utilize. We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to productize seamlessly than to transition magnetically. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become front-end? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think clicks-and-mortar, proactive. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be virtual? Think cyber-cyber-fractal. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XML. We always synthesize integrated implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We here at Hensel Hosting have come to know that it is better to deploy interactively than to generate compellingly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our reporting but our capability to optimize. We understand that it is better to enhance virtually than to morph intuitively. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for handling unplanned-for user communities? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained, open-source, transparent or to be transparent? Quick: do you have a granular, viral, virtual plan for regulating new experiences? If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We will synthesize the capability of power shifts to implement. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We will actualize the aptitude of interfaces to synthesize. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Hensel Hosting has revamped the theory of frictionless structuring. Think resource-constrained. The ability to upgrade virtually leads to the capacity to grow transparently. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! The markets factor is open-source. Without adequate sticky M&A, partnerships are forced to become value-added, 60/24/7/365, affiliate-based. We will enlarge our capacity to upgrade without lessening our aptitude to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be C2B2B? Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough ASP.