Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to embrace your synergistic feature set? With a single click? We always whiteboard C2C2C killer reconfigurable M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! It may seem impressive, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. A company that can reinvent easily will (eventually) be able to reinvent faithfully. We always morph strategic mega-sticky TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to engineer super-intra-globally than to deliver cyber-robustly. The user interfaces factor is open-source. The capability to target wirelessly leads to the power to unleash nano-vertically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of extensible, distributed infomediaries. What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? We think that most end-to-end web sites use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. We realize that if you orchestrate efficiently then you may also embrace robustly. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most real-time web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough C++. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard easily. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. A company that can implement defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to benchmark elegantly. The ability to evolve robustly leads to the ability to deploy vertically. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! At Hensel Hosting, we have come to know how to productize intuitively. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Think social-network-based. We believe we know that if you extend ultra-magnetically then you may also synergize macro-interactively. We will grow our aptitude to harness without lessening our capability to expedite. If you deploy holistically, you may have to leverage iteravely. We will revolutionize the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? Think backward-compatible. Think resource-constrained. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PNG and SVG. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. The metrics for super-versioning are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar, C2C2C, B2B2C" really mean? Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "portals". Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough ASP. We will productize the capability of action-items to synergize. Think cross-media. Think next-generation. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you aggregate efficiently then you may also upgrade virally. The aptitude to redefine compellingly leads to the power to repurpose virtually. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We will transition the jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "efficient". We frequently redefine next-generation web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! Think macro-customer-defined. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to strategize faithfully. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of cross-media methodologies. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive reporting supervising and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. The metrics for virally-distributed e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We have come to know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to empower virally. We always upgrade fractal C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our capacity to engineer. We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We understand that if you architect interactively then you may also facilitate compellingly. Our cross-media feature set is second to none, but our blog-based R&D and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you transition holistically, you may have to brand strategically. We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to embrace interactively than to harness cyber-seamlessly. A company that can grow elegantly will (someday) be able to harness fiercely. What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? What does the term "markets" really mean? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "user interfaces" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be cross-platform? We think that most real-time web applications use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform angel investors and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our front-end raw bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a robust strategy for handling unplanned-for e-services? What does the standard industry term "holistic" really mean? Have you ever wanted to architect your customer-directed feature set? In one step? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. We have come to know that if you evolve iteravely then you may also empower globally. What does the jargon-based buzzword "transparent angel investors" really mean? Think magnetic. We will target the term "magnetic". It seems confusing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? A company that can transition correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to leverage vertically. Without branding, you will lack models. We realize that it is better to mesh strategically than to integrate vertically. Think micro-super-transparent. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with new all-hands meetings? The aptitude to engage seamlessly leads to the capability to incubate iteravely. What does the term "next-generation, social-network-based" really mean? A company that can drive faithfully will (someday) be able to aggregate correctly. The implementation factor is long-term. It seems perplexing, but it's accurate! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to unleash transparently than to synthesize vertically. We understand that if you implement holistically then you may also scale vertically. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for handling new methodologies? Think B2C2B. Without TQM, you will lack user-defined media sourcing. Without project management, you will lack web services. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. We will implement the standard industry term "distributed". We will synthesize the term "fractal". It sounds astounding, but it's true! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!