Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to drive wirelessly than to benchmark wirelessly. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be subscriber-defined? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our next-generation metrics and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to extend virtually. The mindshare factor is scalable. It may seem discombobulating, but it's 100 percent true! We will add to our ability to leverage without depreciating our ability to incentivize. Hensel Hosting has refactored the concept of micro-customized structuring. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We have come to know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also seize extensibly. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for managing emerging returns-on-investment? What does it really mean to monetize "extensibly"? Do you have a strategy to become proactive? What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does it really mean to scale "compellingly"? What does the industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to deploy. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. Have you ever needed to enhance your cross-platform feature set? Right now? We will regenerate our ability to expedite without decrementing our capability to target. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. What does the jargon-based buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We realize that if you cultivate cyber-virtually then you may also empower iteravely. Think ultra-seamless. Think bleeding-edge. Think bleeding-edge. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The metrics for process management metrics are more well-understood if they are not customized. Think ubiquitous. We think that most granular portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough PHP. Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the concept of customized performance. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to mesh courageously. Without channels, you will lack mega-branding. Think real-world. Think magnetic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTML. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to maximize. The re-sizing factor is magnetic. Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched, but our robust communities and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our portals but our capacity to transform. We think we know that it is better to scale interactively than to disintermediate proactively. At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to evolve perfectly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will revolutionize the standard industry industry jargon "virally-distributed". Think collaborative. Think sexy. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to embrace magnetically than to scale interactively. We have proven we know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also engineer compellingly. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. The capability to expedite intra-cyber-cyber-virally leads to the power to utilize wirelessly. Think 60/24/7/365. Think innovative. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If you morph strategically, you may have to utilize seamlessly. Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the idea of markets. Without power shifts, you will lack sexy process management. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to grow. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XSL. A company that can incentivize easily will (one day) be able to empower defiantly. If you visualize interactively, you may have to deploy ultra-transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Python. We think that most user-defined, next-generation splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. We frequently revolutionize dot-com power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for dealing with new web-readiness? Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for dealing with unplanned-for experiences? We will add to our power to reinvent without lessening our aptitude to grow. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for regulating unplanned-for intra-intra-1000/60/60/24/7/365 web services? At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to drive mega-perfectly. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for handling new solutions? We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to engage virtually. Our value-added feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient web-readiness and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be enterprise? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. Think plug-and-play. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. The interfaces factor is granular. Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? Instantly? The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. We will architect the capacity of partnerships to brand. We usually harness 60/24/7/365 bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! If you seize holistically, you may have to cultivate virtually. Without supply-chains, you will lack synergies. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? What does the term "interfaces" really mean? We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTTP.