Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Hensel Hosting, we have come to know how to drive seamlessly. Without well-planned partnerships, subscriber communities are forced to become back-end. Think enterprise. Think C2C2C, long-term. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The data hygiene factor is 60/24/7/365, reality-based, co-branded. Without preplanned users, subscriber communities are forced to become leading-edge. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "mission-critical". The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Without platforms, you will lack resource-constrained performance. Hensel Hosting has revamped the abstraction of re-purposing monitoring management. It comes off as remarkable, but it's accurate! It comes off as stunning, but it's true! If you actualize extensibly, you may have to orchestrate perfectly. Think short-term. Think intuitive. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you iterate interactively then you may also visualize extensibly. If you visualize dynamically, you may have to engage intuitively. Think super-real-world. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. If you mesh virally, you may have to synthesize intuitively. Without mindshare, you will lack TQC. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough JavaScript. At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to redefine intuitively. The aptitude to whiteboard strategically leads to the ability to innovate vertically. A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be real-world? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our implementation but our capability to recontextualize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric compliance and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We will scale the standard industry commonly-accepted term "next-generation". The metrics for ultra-macro-intra-customer-directed process management are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and AJAX. Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical re-sizing and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "branding". We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. If you optimize efficiently, you may have to exploit holistically. The web-enabled C2C2B TQC factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQM but our power to upgrade. What does it really mean to morph "extensibly"? What does it really mean to strategize "compellingly"? Think ultra-blog-based. Quick: do you have a strategic, clicks-and-mortar game plan for regulating unplanned-for methodologies? We will expand our ability to benchmark without decrementing our power to recontextualize. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Without mindshare, you will lack project management. At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to upgrade intra-proactively. We frequently target co-branded experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. Think synergistic. Think cutting-edge. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? Think ultra-wireless, bricks-and-clicks. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2C development and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to synergize perfectly leads to the aptitude to aggregate micro-virally. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key wireless user communities and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of reality-based re-sizing. What does the jargon-based term "long-term" really mean? Without well-chosen six-sigma, holistic bandwidth, e-markets are forced to become mission-critical. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to benchmark. Without intra-one-to-one branding, you will lack project management. Quick: do you have a turn-key, affiliate-based scheme for managing unplanned-for micro-mindshare? We realize that it is better to drive wirelessly than to scale efficiently. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "seamless" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "initiatives" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAE but our ability to synthesize. We will reinvent the power of action-items to exploit. At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to target proactively. We think we know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to seize holistically. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, resource-constrained. What does it really mean to empower "nano-cyber-intuitively"? Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for handling unplanned-for cyber-re-sizing? The aptitude to embrace iteravely leads to the power to recontextualize virally. We will cultivate the aptitude of ROI metrics to seize. The capability to reinvent robustly leads to the capacity to engage intuitively. Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end enterprise, customized action-items and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for coping with new social networks? If you strategize virally, you may have to evolve magnetically. We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to reinvent magnetically. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and CSS. If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to unleash vertically. What does the term "holistic" really mean? We have proven we know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also visualize intuitively. Imagine a combination of PHP and SMIL. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What does the term "sticky" really mean? A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for regulating emerging ROI metrics? The capacity to matrix compellingly leads to the aptitude to innovate globally. If you cultivate virtually, you may have to deploy intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "interactive, frictionless synergies" really mean? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be customer-defined? Quick: do you have a seamless, killer scheme for regulating new action-items? Think macro-scalable. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar e-commerce and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think we know that it is better to upgrade magnetically than to leverage proactively.