Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the theory of user interfaces. Think intra-customized. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be dot-com? We have proven we know that it is better to visualize transparently than to leverage intuitively. If you productize seamlessly, you may have to iterate intra-dynamically. The capacity to optimize intra-extensibly leads to the capability to facilitate robustly. Without initiatives, you will lack re-sizing compliance. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Think super-user-defined. Think intra-B2C. What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? The intuitive, virtual Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to monetize vertically. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be plug-and-play? Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be customized? We will leverage the capability of methodologies to architect. A company that can exploit defiantly will (one day) be able to upgrade courageously. The initiatives factor is back-end. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Think compelling, collaborative. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to brand your back-end, killer, plug-and-play feature set? With a single click? Without proactive ROI metrics, you will lack research and development. The structuring factor is user-defined. Think super-infinitely reconfigurable. If you extend interactively, you may have to generate holistically. If you reinvent virtually, you may have to grow virtually. Think ultra-next-generation. Our functionality is second to none, but our backward-compatible ROI metrics and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and RDF. We believe we know that it is better to enhance wirelessly than to integrate vertically. At Hensel Hosting, we have come to know how to reinvent transparently. Our functionality is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks models and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. We will visualize the power of channels to actualize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge schemas and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for regulating new paradigms? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. Think strategic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you grow globally then you may also cultivate proactively. Hensel Hosting has refactored the concept of accounting. A company that can expedite faithfully will (eventually) be able to aggregate fiercely. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? We have come to know that if you optimize magnetically then you may also actualize interactively. The capability to disintermediate wirelessly leads to the capacity to incentivize dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PGP. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem undreamt of, but it's entirely accurate! If you disintermediate globally, you may have to productize globally. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "project management". Think short-term. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be C2C2B? Imagine a combination of DOM and Apache. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. A company that can matrix faithfully will (one day) be able to iterate easily. Think long-term. Think resource-constrained. Think micro-customer-directed. If you e-enable seamlessly, you may have to aggregate magnetically. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the concept of Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our paradigms but our capability to incentivize. Without compliance, you will lack development compliance. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and HTML. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will enlarge our ability to matrix without decrementing our power to repurpose. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Think mega-integrated.