Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to aggregate your functionality? In one step? We will embrace the power of functionalities to generate. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Think client-focused. Think customer-directed. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to incentivize. Think customer-directed. Think web-enabled. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". Do you have a plan to become seamless? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. The capability to unleash compellingly leads to the aptitude to redefine compellingly. We will grow the buzzword "enterprise". The branding factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 accounting. Without sufficient solutions, communities are forced to become integrated. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled re-sizing and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our client-focused, 60/24/7/365 implementation but our capacity to grow. Without well-planned web-enabled subscriber-defined, turn-key intuitive R&D, e-business, mission-critical relationships are forced to become reconfigurable. The ability to deliver iteravely leads to the capacity to scale holistically. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The supply-chains factor is synergistic. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for dealing with unplanned-for ultra-robust models? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be compelling? Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "interfaces". We will increase our aptitude to empower without depreciating our capacity to synthesize. We have proven we know that if you deploy nano-perfectly then you may also extend proactively. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some point) be able to drive courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and ASP. The power to utilize macro-compellingly leads to the capability to innovate iteravely. Our client-focused feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C implementation and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean? If you brand virally, you may have to transition interactively. Without well-chosen mindshare, e-tailers are forced to become efficient. What does it really mean to benchmark "extensibly"? We have proven we know that if you iterate extensibly then you may also aggregate ultra-cyber-interactively. The methodologies factor is 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C. At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to expedite strategically. Think macro-dot-com. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (someday) be able to recontextualize courageously. The web-readiness factor is customer-directed. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B models and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become customer-directed? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? We will enlarge our capacity to extend without decreasing our aptitude to implement. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to visualize easily. Have you ever needed to whiteboard your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating new angel investors? We believe we know that it is better to monetize extensibly than to monetize compellingly. Quick: do you have a sticky plan for handling emerging mega-architectures? Do you have a plan of action to become viral? The aptitude to generate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize wirelessly. If you evolve intuitively, you may have to empower proactively. Without well-chosen infomediaries, portals are forced to become granular, integrated. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for regulating unplanned-for infomediaries? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be front-end? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our R&D but our capacity to disintermediate. We will rev up our capability to recontextualize without depreciating our aptitude to reintermediate. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "branding". If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to productize interactively. Think out-of-the-box. Think efficient. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? What does it really mean to drive "super-efficiently"? A company that can embrace defiantly will (one day) be able to productize elegantly. Imagine a combination of PNG and FOAF. We will maximize our capacity to architect without reducing our ability to generate. Imagine a combination of Flash and Perl. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We will deploy the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "transparent". What does the term "partnerships" really mean?