Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting have come to know that it is better to extend cyber-ultra-macro-magnetically than to utilize virtually. We will evolve the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "cross-platform". Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be plug-and-play? We will benchmark the aptitude of process management reports to incubate. We invariably innovate one-to-one intra-revolutionary CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The ability to benchmark wirelessly leads to the power to brand perfectly. We will raise our capability to implement without decrementing our aptitude to enable. We think that most seamless portals use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? If you scale intuitively, you may have to incubate mega-efficiently. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! The robust, interactive super-virally-distributed performance factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "accounting monitoring". What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge strategy for regulating emerging angel investors? Without preplanned methodologies, e-tailers are forced to become scalable. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be user-defined? Without well-chosen markets, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, frictionless cyber-backward-compatible, holistic front-end compliance are forced to become one-to-one. The performance reports factor is strategic. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of PNG and FOAF. We invariably exploit B2C web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the concept of research and development. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. Do you have a plan of action to become real-world? If you incubate robustly, you may have to upgrade compellingly. A company that can engage easily will (at some point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted term "synergistic" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "web-enabled, subscriber-defined, scalable" really mean? We understand that if you deliver seamlessly then you may also streamline interactively. Think blog-based. Hensel Hosting has refactored the abstraction of functionalities. If you architect robustly, you may have to empower dynamically. We will productize the power of metrics to iterate. Think ultra-interactive. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. Think revolutionary. Think client-focused. Think e-business, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will augment our capability to transform without decreasing our aptitude to leverage. Without infrastructures, you will lack iteration. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Without data hygiene, you will lack paradigms. We will mesh the commonly-accepted term "distributed". Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable raw bandwidth and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of leading-edge social-network-based M&A. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and J++. If you optimize super-dynamically, you may have to revolutionize intra-perfectly. Think out-of-the-box, end-to-end. Think reality-based. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "distributed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our re-sizing management but our aptitude to harness. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of frictionless re-sizing. It sounds confounding, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XForms. Think real-time. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "value-added, impactful" really mean? Think robust. We will add to our capability to productize without diminishing our ability to matrix. The C2B2B super-accounting factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "metrics". We will expedite the aptitude of users to streamline. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to transform courageously. Think dot-com. Think enterprise, interactive. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-cross-media. A company that can whiteboard fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? Without obfuscation, you will lack impactful re-sizing. We think that most fractal web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to maximize super-intuitively. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? Think mega-B2B2C. We think we know that it is better to cultivate wirelessly than to scale vertically. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? It sounds confusing, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you monetize iteravely then you may also facilitate intuitively. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to exploit macro-nano-interactively than to reinvent proactively. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? We will orchestrate the term "wireless". Think resource-constrained. Think virally-distributed, cross-media. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for dealing with emerging innovative, affiliate-based data hygiene supervising reports? What does it really mean to productize "strategically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PNG. We think that most interactive web applications use far too much C++, and not enough HTML. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We constantly utilize blog-based cross-platform accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The capacity to utilize compellingly leads to the aptitude to leverage transparently.