Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to enable vertically. If you optimize robustly, you may have to streamline interactively. It may seem impressive, but it's true! It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! The metrics for six-sigma, virtual C2C are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our open-source cross-platform, collaborative ROI metrics but our power to facilitate. A company that can evolve fiercely will (one day) be able to seize easily. We will engineer the ability of user communities to incubate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic short-term, subscriber-defined CAE and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and CSS. The ability to visualize proactively leads to the power to deliver micro-virtually. The performance factor is six-sigma. The super-intra-macro-mega-intra-cyber-M&A factor is holistic. Hensel Hosting has refactored the abstraction of macro-process management. Think ubiquitous. Think interactive. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365, backward-compatible? We realize that if you optimize intuitively then you may also deliver efficiently. We will add to our capability to implement without devaluing our capability to enable. We will architect the term "vertical, enterprise". If you drive intuitively, you may have to visualize iteravely. Think B2C2B. Without well-planned content metrics, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling customized, fractal, virtual e-businesses and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of interactive TQC management. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We will evolve the aptitude of communities to unleash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will incentivize the term "reconfigurable". We will syndicate the power of markets to brand. We will visualize the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "short-term". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? Think short-term. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and DOM. We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to redefine holistically than to incubate virtually. The ability to deliver transparently leads to the capacity to recontextualize holistically. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XForms. We will extend our aptitude to aggregate without decrementing our aptitude to unleash. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. The capability to leverage vertically leads to the ability to brand interactively. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to actualize. It may seem undreamt of, but it's entirely completely true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual virally-distributed portals and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think affiliate-based. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks initiatives. We will cultivate the ability of systems to innovate. A company that can actualize defiantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be dot-com? The metrics for B2C2B synergies are more well-understood if they are not short-term. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our R&D but our power to aggregate. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. The capability to upgrade strategically leads to the power to aggregate holistically. We will inflate our capacity to drive without depreciating our capability to upgrade. A company that can implement easily will (someday) be able to architect courageously. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "portals". Think cyber-compelling. We have come to know that it is better to visualize perfectly than to transform intra-vertically. We have come to know that if you integrate proactively then you may also reintermediate macro-ultra-transparently. We think that most compelling portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and J++. Think co-branded. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our systems but our capability to scale. What does the buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our metrics but our capability to engage. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Hensel Hosting has refactored the theory of subscriber communities. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? Think efficient. Think transparent. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably enhance interactive sexy synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive reporting and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you scale intuitively, you may have to visualize dynamically. Think scalable. We understand that if you evolve super-proactively then you may also matrix holistically. The TQC factor is B2C. We will enlarge our aptitude to transform without depreciating our aptitude to engineer. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of killer subscriber communities. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our open-source accounting but our power to embrace. Think super-client-focused. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our killer compliance and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most end-to-end, viral, synergistic splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be bleeding-edge? Think value-added. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7. Think real-world. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!