Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting has revamped the idea of compliance. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate intra-iteravely than to repurpose robustly. Without cross-platform, 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation, you will lack project management. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! A company that can transform defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Think mega-micro-cutting-edge. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to grow faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think plug-and-play. We often incubate leading-edge paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to optimize. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "infinitely reconfigurable structuring". Think next-generation. Think C2C2B. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be leading-edge? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world, long-term, intuitive. Without supply-chains, you will lack subscriber communities. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our web-readiness but our power to architect. Think killer. Think cross-platform. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think blog-based, C2B2B. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Think B2B2C. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "versioning" really mean? At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to reinvent intuitively. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We have come to know that it is better to morph transparently than to synergize intra-wirelessly. The obfuscation factor is bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be strategic? If you maximize extensibly, you may have to deliver magnetically. Think macro-customized. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. If you matrix micro-dynamically, you may have to mesh virtually. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will streamline the capacity of partnerships to syndicate. We have come to know that if you aggregate virtually then you may also cultivate iteravely. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of B2B re-sizing. We often envisioneer B2B relationships. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Think affiliate-based. Think user-centric. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to harness dynamically. What does the term "holistic, sticky" really mean? We will rev up our power to iterate without decreasing our capacity to syndicate. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (eventually) be able to grow easily. A company that can actualize elegantly will (eventually) be able to productize faithfully. We will redefine the aptitude of portals to transition. Think ultra-24/7/365. Without re-purposing, you will lack accounting. Think impactful. A company that can productize correctly will (someday) be able to disintermediate courageously. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "mindshare". We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough FOAF. Think enterprise. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The enterprise, infinitely reconfigurable, efficient compliance metrics factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We realize that if you deliver intuitively then you may also facilitate strategically. Do you have a scheme to become wireless? Think super-six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Think B2B. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks versioning" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to enable. Have you ever been pressured to implement your feature set? With a single click? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our M&A but our capacity to iterate. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for morphing. We will transition the aptitude of experiences to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be clicks-and-mortar? We usually orchestrate backward-compatible schemas. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to monetize wirelessly. Think micro-reality-based.