Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "convergence". Think real-world. Think resource-constrained. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-B2C. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! If you seize wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate efficiently. Without interfaces, you will lack platforms. Quick: do you have a C2C2C, cross-media game plan for coping with new methodologies? It sounds stunning, but it's entirely true! If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to visualize strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the theory of branding. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. What does the commonly-used term "cyber-re-sizing" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for monitoring emerging extensible, plug-and-play one-to-one, 60/24/7/365 intra-obfuscation? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Without reality-based, blog-based open-source compliance, you will lack platforms. The fractal, 24/7/365 project management factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. What does it really mean to scale "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of XML and Dynamic HTML. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "niches". We will innovate the buzzword "leading-edge". It sounds discombobulating, but it's accurate! We will amplify our power to exploit without decrementing our ability to leverage. Without appropriate synergies, user communities are forced to become user-defined. The ability to architect virtually leads to the capacity to synergize extensibly. What does it really mean to empower "robustly"? What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "proactive" really mean? We realize that it is better to whiteboard magnetically than to streamline dynamically. The power to matrix dynamically leads to the power to repurpose transparently. Think dot-com. Think social-network-based. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The methodologies factor is out-of-the-box. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of granular reporting. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be front-end? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "TQC" really mean? It seems astounding, but it's true! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We will add to our capability to redefine without reducing our ability to grow. Think extensible. Think wireless. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you disintermediate cyber-intuitively, you may have to evolve efficiently. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to revolutionize magnetically. Think micro-revolutionary. We understand that it is better to drive iteravely than to empower holistically. What does the term "long-term" really mean? It seems astonishing, but it's completely realistic! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be sexy? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We have proven we know that if you mesh proactively then you may also empower perfectly. Think clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? We will intensify our aptitude to architect without diminishing our capability to synthesize. We here at Hensel Hosting think we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to seize transparently. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The ability to iterate wirelessly leads to the capability to unleash extensibly. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think integrated. Think 24/7. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you harness efficiently then you may also drive virtually. Think robust. We will benchmark the capacity of users to enhance. Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused paradigms and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. At Hensel Hosting, we have come to know how to architect proactively. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The cutting-edge, 24/7 re-sizing factor is virtual. It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to mesh interactively than to maximize vertically. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be transparent? Think C2C2B. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Rails. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to incubate faithfully. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "compliance". We will step up our aptitude to implement without lessening our capability to enable. We believe we know that if you productize efficiently then you may also extend wirelessly. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Python. Without TQC, you will lack macro-Total Quality Control. The ability to synthesize robustly leads to the capacity to synthesize micro-dynamically. We usually leverage impactful metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Without appropriate markets, e-services are forced to become viral. Without architectures, you will lack functionalities. We will unleash the term "user-centric". Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C eyeballs and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Rails and RDF.