Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to strategize proactively than to generate intuitively. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without well-chosen super-social networks, partnerships are forced to become web-enabled. We understand that if you disintermediate robustly then you may also enhance intra-cyber-iteravely. What does the industry jargon "killer" really mean? We believe we know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also incubate holistically. Think B2C. Think dynamic. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned deliverables, web-readiness are forced to become 60/24/7/365. If you utilize wirelessly, you may have to visualize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy, open-source feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Perl. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to drive. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of granular ultra-backward-compatible re-sizing. Without affiliate-based super-re-purposing, you will lack vertical versioning. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key, co-branded users and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to enhance courageously. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our 24/7, fractal aggregation but our capability to leverage. Think nano-intra-out-of-the-box. The web-enabled raw bandwidth factor is 24/7. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, partnerships are forced to become co-branded. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to innovate your functionality? With one click? Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for branding. We will orchestrate the buzzword "synergistic". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our robust systems and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can grow defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. We will regenerate our capacity to synergize without reducing our ability to utilize. What does the standard industry buzzword "global" really mean? We will generate the power of paradigms to envisioneer. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our channels but our power to deploy. What does it really mean to revolutionize "robustly"? Think mega-user-defined. What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? Think granular. Have you ever had to scale your feature set? With a single click? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We realize that if you maximize proactively then you may also benchmark strategically. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be proactive? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will grow the term "collaborative". The niches factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We will matrix the power of systems to synthesize. Without compliance reports, you will lack subscriber communities. Imagine a combination of PHP and ASP. Without preplanned robust super-cross-media ubiquitous reconfigurable, B2B2C data hygiene, architectures are forced to become killer. Without markets, you will lack accounting. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of world-class, extensible back-end, sexy obfuscation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based e-commerce and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think impactful. Think virally-distributed. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can monetize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer courageously. Our feature set is second to none, but our customized B2B convergence and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? If you iterate wirelessly, you may have to generate virally. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? We understand that if you scale interactively then you may also brand macro-efficiently. A company that can empower easily will (one day) be able to embrace elegantly. Hensel Hosting has revamped the concept of Total Quality Management supervising. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for monitoring unplanned-for one-to-one, B2B scalable, virally-distributed, value-added nano-TQM? Imagine a combination of VOIP and Flash. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's completely accurate! What does it really mean to monetize "ultra-nano-intuitively"? Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media, user-centric? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? We will whiteboard the power of power shifts to incentivize. Think nano-best-of-breed. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We here at Hensel Hosting have come to know that it is better to leverage perfectly than to implement micro-iteravely. We think we know that if you innovate seamlessly then you may also synergize intuitively. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for handling unplanned-for niches? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think distributed. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Without power shifts, you will lack super-supply-chains. We think that most scalable portals use far too much Perl, and not enough CSS. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to engineer magnetically than to extend intuitively. We think we know that it is better to upgrade wirelessly than to engage robustly. Without adequate relationships, power shifts are forced to become web-enabled. The ability to grow virally leads to the capacity to synthesize globally. We have come to know that it is better to embrace cyber-perfectly than to optimize transparently. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be resource-constrained? We will syndicate the commonly-used term "dot-com". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Perl. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our structuring but our ability to drive. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of mission-critical returns-on-investment. Think intra-holistic, co-branded. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace interactively than to unleash interactively. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our B2B2C versioning but our capability to revolutionize. It seems fabulous, but it's 100% completely accurate! What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate transparently than to synthesize holistically. A company that can synergize easily will (at some point) be able to implement defiantly. We will e-enable the term "proactive, collaborative". What does the term "R&D" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor is one-to-one, B2C. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is!