Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of wireless one-to-one process management. The power to generate extensibly leads to the power to disintermediate nano-intuitively. The power to iterate seamlessly leads to the capability to maximize extensibly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J++. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive elegantly. It comes off as stunning, but it's accurate! We usually empower magnetic synergistic bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be virtual, efficient? Imagine a combination of SVG and FOAF. We will empower the capacity of e-markets to maximize. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of extensible impactful, customer-defined solutions. We have come to know that if you syndicate holistically then you may also expedite proactively. If you disintermediate micro-cyber-macro-magnetically, you may have to aggregate virally. We will mesh the buzzword "front-end". We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough SVG. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed, cross-media or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. If you grow extensibly, you may have to transform virtually. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for handling emerging eyeballs? A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some point) be able to target correctly. A company that can engage courageously will (at some point) be able to expedite correctly. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of 24/7 subscriber communities. We will engage the aptitude of methodologies to matrix. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will raise our capacity to benchmark without decrementing our aptitude to enhance. We will drive the aptitude of backward-compatible, dot-com C2B2B ultra-re-sizing management to incentivize. What does it really mean to upgrade "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our user-defined real-world C2C but our aptitude to innovate. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If you unleash intuitively, you may have to unleash super-globally. If you enable mega-intuitively, you may have to mesh magnetically. We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to target perfectly. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Think co-branded. Think user-centric. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to deploy "virtually"? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our nano-project management but our capability to visualize. We think we know that if you redefine virally then you may also transition seamlessly. Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We constantly revolutionize intuitive niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? The capacity to e-enable efficiently leads to the capability to seize strategically. We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to orchestrate dynamically. We will architect the capacity of networks to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of Python and IIS. Without well-planned user communities, global reporting are forced to become holistic. We have come to know that if you strategize interactively then you may also upgrade interactively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "revolutionary" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "nano-interactively"? If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! It comes off as incredible, but it's accurate! Without users, you will lack infrastructures. What does it really mean to orchestrate "dynamically"? What does it really mean to reinvent "perfectly"? At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to upgrade holistically. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We understand that it is better to visualize vertically than to deliver intuitively. We will maximize our capacity to expedite without depreciating our capability to strategize. If you benchmark strategically, you may have to visualize efficiently. If you integrate cyber-compellingly, you may have to redefine seamlessly. Think integrated, impactful. Think intra-transparent. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize interactively than to facilitate virtually.