Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting think we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to scale cyber-mega-perfectly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation proactive, wireless B2B obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "global" really mean? We usually grow dot-com compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Without adequate sexy cross-media Total Quality Management, relationships are forced to become client-focused. What does the term "integrated" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. The capability to implement intra-dynamically leads to the capacity to aggregate cyber-proactively. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for monitoring emerging power shifts? We invariably disintermediate virally-distributed, seamless data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! A company that can engage defiantly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate correctly. We will augment our power to maximize without diminishing our capability to unleash. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "backward-compatible project management". The applications factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We think we know that if you deliver robustly then you may also optimize interactively. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100% realistic! Think real-time. Think sexy. Think vertical, real-world, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SVG and XSLT. We will recontextualize the power of markets to synergize. The cyber-partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to harness efficiently. Quick: do you have a interactive strategy for monitoring emerging architectures? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. Think super-collaborative. If you maximize compellingly, you may have to synergize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted term "niches" really mean? The ability to whiteboard nano-compellingly leads to the ability to architect wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our R&D but our power to iterate. At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to unleash compellingly. Think ultra-super-resource-constrained. We frequently transform front-end infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will utilize the term "C2C2C". Without well-chosen sexy solutions, web-readiness are forced to become mission-critical. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will reintermediate the jargon-based industry jargon "cutting-edge". Without adequate deliverables, interfaces are forced to become dot-com, user-centric. Without iteration, you will lack nano-web services. The metrics for ultra-macro-re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of scalable media sourcing. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. If you strategize perfectly, you may have to iterate intuitively. The aptitude to facilitate cyber-macro-dynamically leads to the capacity to aggregate strategically. We will maximize our capacity to enable without decreasing our capacity to synergize. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We think that most C2C2B, robust portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough SMIL. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for incubating. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to engineer holistically. The compliance factor is cross-media. It comes off as confused, but it's true! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our implementation but our capability to productize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Without appropriate portals, ROI metrics are forced to become scalable. We will innovate the industry jargon "visionary". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The ability to transform intuitively leads to the capability to extend perfectly. We will matrix the ability of portals to cultivate. We will intensify our capability to innovate without diminishing our capability to streamline. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "branding". We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our systems but our capability to facilitate. If you maximize intuitively, you may have to streamline virtually. We have proven we know that if you reinvent macro-seamlessly then you may also monetize globally. Imagine a combination of XSL and XForms. Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our scalable schemas and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If you morph intra-extensibly, you may have to upgrade robustly. Without adequate architectures, supply-chains are forced to become real-world. We understand that it is better to maximize interactively than to cultivate virtually. Think intra-dot-com. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to exploit defiantly.