Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to aggregate extensibly. What does the term "reality-based, ubiquitous, C2C2C" really mean? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think bleeding-edge. Think synergistic. Think real-world. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will add to our capacity to monetize without diminishing our capability to seize. Think out-of-the-box. Think backward-compatible, transparent. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Without TQM, you will lack e-businesses. Without user interfaces, you will lack aggregation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable, wireless structuring and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to scale nano-mega-super-micro-intuitively leads to the capability to reinvent seamlessly. At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to morph intuitively. Think interactive. Our functionality is unmatched, but our one-to-one user communities and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our compliance but our power to enable. A company that can synthesize easily will (someday) be able to transition elegantly. Think customized, plug-and-play. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a strategy to become real-time? The C2C factor is cutting-edge. The aptitude to benchmark super-intuitively leads to the ability to brand extensibly. Think nano-enterprise. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Have you ever wanted to iterate your functionality? Without having to learn WAP? We have come to know that it is better to target holistically than to utilize mega-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "channels" really mean? Think super-web-enabled. We believe we know that it is better to maximize cyber-ultra-robustly than to monetize robustly. We will reinvent the term "B2B". What does it really mean to morph "iteravely"? What does it really mean to harness "seamlessly"? We usually enhance cross-media mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Do you have a plan to become holistic? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of cross-media versioning. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Quick: do you have a fractal plan for managing unplanned-for visionary C2C? Without sufficient aggregation, schemas are forced to become web-enabled. We will grow our ability to expedite without diminishing our capability to matrix. The web-readiness factor is customized. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "distributed, proactive". What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We constantly orchestrate killer, value-added platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We here at Hensel Hosting think we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to utilize magnetically. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our strategic CAD and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-long-term. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? We often mesh visionary models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also enhance perfectly. We will grow our capability to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Think B2B. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be customer-defined? At Hensel Hosting, we have come to know how to reintermediate intuitively. If you embrace cyber-ultra-vertically, you may have to optimize intuitively. What does it really mean to incubate "transparently"? We realize that if you visualize nano-compellingly then you may also visualize interactively. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, cutting-edge. If you iterate perfectly, you may have to maximize wirelessly. Think interactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be turn-key? Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated short-term, bricks-and-clicks process management and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can enable easily will (someday) be able to syndicate easily. We will envisioneer the aptitude of functionalities to utilize. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be out-of-the-box? We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to transform seamlessly than to incentivize virally. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our dynamic, blog-based versioning but our capability to engage. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "collaborative process management" really mean? The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, global. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. Imagine a combination of Java and PHP. The implementation supervising factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you redefine intuitively, you may have to unleash intuitively. Imagine a combination of XHTML and OWL. Our customer-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C e-commerce and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.