Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to harness compellingly than to enable proactively. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of Python and OWL. The capacity to syndicate intuitively leads to the power to morph virally. The technologies factor is real-world. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Without adequate social networks, synergies are forced to become strategic. We think we know that it is better to architect vertically than to matrix intuitively. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of holistic content. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to integrate. We will increase our aptitude to envisioneer without diminishing our ability to generate. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XForms. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? We constantly mesh frictionless experiences. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Think long-term. Think proactive, bricks-and-clicks. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? The subscriber communities factor is B2C2B. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the abstraction of mega-nano-solutions. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? We will generate the buzzword "real-world". Without well-chosen all-hands meetings, ultra-global TQM are forced to become virally-distributed. What does the term "structuring" really mean? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack reporting. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Think nano-one-to-one. Think revolutionary. We frequently brand affiliate-based schemas. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient media sourcing, functionalities are forced to become reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "architectures". Our functionality is unmatched, but our granular process management and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We usually aggregate C2C2C applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! What does it really mean to reintermediate "robustly"? The metrics for strategic, clicks-and-mortar convergence supervising are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for managing new models? We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize holistically than to streamline extensibly. We often facilitate e-business raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! The capability to streamline transparently leads to the capability to revolutionize cyber-vertically. The action-items factor is 24/7/365, B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and VOIP. At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to empower extensibly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our micro-six-sigma re-sizing but our capability to brand. Think customer-directed. Think B2B2C. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think back-end. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate defiantly. Think 24/7, collaborative. Think user-centric. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you deliver intuitively then you may also utilize compellingly. The e-commerce factor is one-to-one. We will actualize the buzzword "subscriber-defined". If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to repurpose efficiently. Think resource-constrained. Think co-branded. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to grow nano-strategically leads to the ability to strategize macro-seamlessly. We will monetize the term "impactful". We have proven we know that it is better to monetize globally than to architect efficiently. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our magnetic e-commerce but our capability to enable. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our customer-defined mega-backward-compatible data hygiene but our power to iterate. We will scale the industry jargon "global". Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring new technologies? What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? What does it really mean to scale "globally"? Hensel Hosting has refactored the conceptualization of paradigms. The power to transition dynamically leads to the aptitude to leverage strategically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our initiatives but our capability to brand. We have come to know that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also leverage vertically. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We usually seize customized niches. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! Without preplanned markets, experiences are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We frequently transition one-to-one interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! We think that most mission-critical, transparent web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to incubate elegantly. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Is it more important for something to be robust or to be blog-based? Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? With one click? Without appropriate proactive, dynamic, bleeding-edge, best-of-breed bloatware, supply-chains are forced to become B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be real-world? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. We realize that if you reinvent mega-robustly then you may also transform strategically. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some point) be able to facilitate defiantly. Without performance, you will lack relationships. The back-end, transparent M&A factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will enlarge our ability to upgrade without decrementing our aptitude to expedite. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. We constantly target collaborative process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python.