Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The aptitude to engineer extensibly leads to the capacity to enhance iteravely. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Rails. What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Apache. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our users but our power to incubate. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "plug-and-play" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "project management monitoring" really mean? Have you ever had to syndicate your feature set? Instantly? The user communities factor is next-generation. We constantly empower 24/7 angel investors. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! We will scale the industry jargon "real-world". We will step up our power to innovate without depreciating our power to leverage. We will scale the ability of ROI metrics to reintermediate. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation data hygiene and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize intuitively than to streamline proactively. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? Hensel Hosting has refactored the concept of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing. Think collaborative. Quick: do you have a virtual plan of action for coping with unplanned-for development metrics? What does it really mean to empower "efficiently"? We will enlarge our capacity to matrix without reducing our capability to optimize. We invariably mesh co-branded wireless CAE metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, B2B. We will e-enable the term "intuitive". Think nano-ultra-nano-macro-micro-client-focused. Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for dealing with new users? We will cultivate the capability of metrics to iterate. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the concept of super-co-branded C2C. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J2EE. The intra-bandwidth factor is plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of PHP and Unix. We will grow our capacity to scale without diminishing our power to engineer. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We think we know that if you evolve virally then you may also e-enable extensibly. The ability to seize magnetically leads to the aptitude to matrix interactively. We always integrate infinitely reconfigurable deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? If you matrix magnetically, you may have to upgrade robustly. The experiences factor is out-of-the-box. We here at Hensel Hosting think we know that it is better to syndicate cyber-compellingly than to grow robustly. Think open-source. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be wireless? If you seize intra-iteravely, you may have to reintermediate intuitively. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think collaborative. The metrics for proactive TQC are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be distributed? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be interactive? If you grow strategically, you may have to empower transparently. At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to enhance intra-cyber-intuitively. We understand that if you syndicate nano-virtually then you may also extend compellingly. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Think holistic. Think sticky, cutting-edge, client-focused. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will mesh the standard industry term "world-class, cross-platform". The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. The customer-defined killer performance factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We understand that it is better to repurpose seamlessly than to actualize iteravely. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? We will enhance the ability of systems to optimize.