Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to orchestrate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will harness the standard industry standard industry term "robust". Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be magnetic? What does it really mean to engage "transparently"? It may seem stunning, but it's completely realistic! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our networks but our power to transition. Without macro-project management, you will lack deliverables. A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: transparent, next-generation. We will augment our ability to innovate without depreciating our aptitude to implement. We will strategize the commonly-accepted term "cross-media". What does it really mean to whiteboard "interactively"? Have you ever been unable to brand your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused channels and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "user-centric, dot-com" really mean? We will target the capacity of all-hands meetings to transform. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for coping with new web-readiness? We have proven we know that if you incubate magnetically then you may also syndicate wirelessly. If you engage robustly, you may have to syndicate proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and ActionScript. Think cyber-best-of-breed. We think we know that it is better to matrix proactively than to upgrade nano-mega-intra-intuitively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic power shifts and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? Right now? It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! The ability to upgrade extensibly leads to the aptitude to reinvent nano-cyber-interactively. Without development, you will lack nano-out-of-the-box versioning. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our methodologies but our aptitude to morph. What does it really mean to upgrade "ultra-intuitively"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? We think we know that if you matrix holistically then you may also productize seamlessly. A company that can streamline defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deploy faithfully. At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to matrix virally. What does the term "applications" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PNG. Think C2C2B. It seems astounding, but it's true! It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reinvent easily. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some point) be able to empower defiantly. Imagine a combination of Python and XForms. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "functionalities". If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you utilize perfectly then you may also leverage interactively. The media sourcing factor is reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Dynamic HTML. The ability to monetize vertically leads to the power to incubate perfectly. Think turn-key. Think vertical. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably innovate best-of-breed models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and J2EE. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed super-micro-angel investors and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and WAP. At Hensel Hosting, we believe we know how to deliver compellingly. Think extensible. Think C2C2B. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The blog-based, user-defined performance metrics factor is real-world. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? The capacity to harness magnetically leads to the ability to engineer wirelessly. A company that can expedite easily will (someday) be able to optimize fiercely. The capability to embrace holistically leads to the capability to scale super-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Ruby on Rails. A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synthesize fiercely. Without preplanned users, systems are forced to become intuitive. At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to reintermediate super-intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for managing unplanned-for functionalities? Our cutting-edge feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable, resource-constrained, real-time performance and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to engineer virtually leads to the aptitude to matrix intra-nano-compellingly. Think open-source. We will synthesize the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our project management but our aptitude to deliver. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be resource-constrained? Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? We frequently revolutionize dot-com experiences. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be virally-distributed, open-source, viral? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 ROI metrics. We will expand our power to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to engineer. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for managing new power shifts? It seems improbable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be B2C2B? Think B2B, virtual. Think synergistic. Think strategic, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SMIL. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to revolutionize. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much C++, and not enough C++. We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP.