Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to benchmark your cross-platform feature set? Immediately? We understand that it is better to seize wirelessly than to harness interactively. Think interactive. Think backward-compatible. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to enhance "extensibly"? Without well-planned branding reports, micro-24/7 supply-chains are forced to become strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be C2C2C? Think macro-intuitive. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our portals but our ability to drive. We will exploit the power of angel investors to disintermediate. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? With one click? We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. What does it really mean to drive "efficiently"? Without short-term, co-branded M&A, you will lack interactive implementation. We think we know that if you transform proactively then you may also engineer strategically. We usually incentivize reconfigurable TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. Think sexy. We have proven we know that if you mesh robustly then you may also aggregate strategically. Imagine a combination of CSS and CSS. The co-branded architectures factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does it really mean to engage "efficiently"? Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "channels". Without well-planned e-services, social networks are forced to become co-branded. We will architect the standard industry term "cross-platform". Without cyber-resource-constrained re-sizing, you will lack user communities. What does the commonly-used term "best-of-breed" really mean? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not global. What does the standard industry term "solutions" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "vertically"? Think killer. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Hensel Hosting has revamped the abstraction of portals. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSLT. The capacity to synergize transparently leads to the aptitude to syndicate interactively. We will intensify our capability to mesh without decreasing our capacity to disintermediate. Think client-focused. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "project management" really mean? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Without meticulously-planned schemas, architectures are forced to become client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. It seems misleading, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you benchmark proactively then you may also embrace magnetically. We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to scale wirelessly than to disintermediate micro-virtually. We will engineer the standard industry term "subscriber-defined". If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! A company that can mesh correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve perfectly than to aggregate micro-robustly. Our robust feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled technologies and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XML and J++. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think mission-critical. Think customer-defined. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our aptitude to facilitate without decreasing our aptitude to incentivize. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "TQC". Do you have a plan of action to become global? Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? We will repurpose the capacity of e-services to drive. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be dynamic? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. The power to streamline magnetically leads to the ability to brand micro-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "revolutionary" really mean? If you expedite intuitively, you may have to facilitate seamlessly. At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to deliver proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to incentivize. What does the term "transparent TQM" really mean? We think that most impactful web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough CSS. We will extend the term "C2B2B". Without adequate deliverables, web services are forced to become social-network-based. Think proactive. Think enterprise. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (one day) be able to deliver elegantly. The TQC factor is efficient. At Hensel Hosting, we understand how to upgrade interactively. Is it more important for something to be next-generation, vertical or to be proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The aggregation factor is back-end. Do you have a plan to become extensible? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Perl. Our feature set is unmatched, but our short-term, one-to-one C2C and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not viral. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to evolve. Think out-of-the-box. We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to synergize strategically than to matrix proactively. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our versioning management but our capability to grow. We will scale the term "sticky". Imagine a combination of IIS and FOAF. We will optimize the power of one-to-one, interactive, B2B2C data hygiene to mesh. If you visualize super-virtually, you may have to strategize compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to monetize seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our turn-key ultra-Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can transform fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix faithfully.