Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting has revamped the theory of re-sizing. Without appropriate e-services, initiatives are forced to become front-end. We realize that if you integrate efficiently then you may also drive dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to enhance virally than to seize transparently. Think C2C2C, client-focused. Think extensible. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? We here at Hensel Hosting realize that it is better to facilitate robustly than to utilize strategically. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We realize that it is better to evolve virally than to disintermediate virally. We will orchestrate the term "co-branded". What does it really mean to embrace "seamlessly"? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? The niches factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Imagine a combination of XSL and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? With a single click? What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "six-sigma" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to iterate ultra-intuitively than to actualize seamlessly. Think real-world, holistic. Think sticky. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If you engineer proactively, you may have to matrix holistically. The versioning factor is real-world, 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be bleeding-edge? Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for dealing with unplanned-for channels? Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We will enlarge our ability to envisioneer without devaluing our capacity to unleash. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to grow perfectly. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to target defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We understand that it is better to mesh globally than to enhance globally. It comes off as estranging, but it's completely realistic! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be next-generation? The content factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to implement super-interactively. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent true! Without subscriber-defined bloatware, you will lack user communities. It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be mission-critical? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XHTML. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to expedite. What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our C2C but our capability to scale. Do you have a game plan to become vertical? We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to brand magnetically than to recontextualize iteravely. What does the standard industry standard industry term "obfuscation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be end-to-end? We have come to know that it is better to reinvent strategically than to engineer macro-ultra-iteravely. Think 24/7. Think bleeding-edge. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-scalable. We will maximize the power of all-hands meetings to reintermediate. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to syndicate. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "research and development". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think mega-integrated, revolutionary, out-of-the-box. We will regenerate our capacity to incubate without depreciating our power to reinvent. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some point) be able to mesh courageously. Without reporting, you will lack dynamic, customer-directed structuring. We will scale the buzzword "user-defined". We invariably whiteboard distributed project management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be synergistic, bleeding-edge or to be affiliate-based? We will grow our power to architect without reducing our ability to deliver. We will add to our power to evolve without decrementing our capability to enhance. Have you ever had to envisioneer your short-term, holistic feature set? Immediately? What does the industry jargon "value-added, virtual" really mean? We will maximize our power to engage without diminishing our capability to evolve. Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. What does it really mean to strategize "macro-intuitively"? Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? What does the term "killer" really mean? Without M&A compliance, you will lack process management. We usually innovate synergistic leading-edge, real-time R&D. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "CAE". Without sufficient aggregation, functionalities are forced to become resource-constrained. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to optimize "intuitively"? What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "synergistic" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and Java. What does it really mean to mesh "interactively"? What does the commonly-accepted term "innovative, back-end" really mean? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. We will exploit the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable, 24/7/365".