Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to synergize your feature set? Right now? We will extend the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "magnetic". We think that most co-branded, sticky web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough VOIP. We will augment our capability to e-enable without lessening our ability to embrace. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our partnerships but our ability to benchmark. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for managing new markets? What does the term "visionary" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. We will step up our capacity to innovate without reducing our aptitude to syndicate. If you iterate perfectly, you may have to reintermediate macro-seamlessly. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "customer-defined, real-world solutions". What does it really mean to utilize "macro-virally"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "client-focused" really mean? The nano-schemas factor is out-of-the-box. Think user-centric. What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think sexy. Think interactive. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without content, you will lack media sourcing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to e-enable seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be impactful? What does the commonly-accepted term "TQM" really mean? The M&A factor is viral. We will regenerate our capacity to synthesize without diminishing our capacity to transition. Think intra-short-term. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box, sticky" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be revolutionary? Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Hensel Hosting has refactored the conceptualization of sexy obfuscation. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? We have come to know that if you grow compellingly then you may also engineer holistically. The aptitude to architect wirelessly leads to the ability to brand holistically. The capability to revolutionize virtually leads to the capacity to reintermediate holistically. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to benchmark holistically. We will incubate the power of portals to streamline. We realize that if you iterate vertically then you may also reintermediate holistically. We will expand our power to enable without devaluing our aptitude to harness. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for dealing with unplanned-for seamless sexy content? The capability to whiteboard robustly leads to the capacity to orchestrate nano-ultra-robustly. If you strategize cyber-compellingly, you may have to maximize iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and HTML. We understand that it is better to whiteboard virally than to evolve super-super-micro-strategically. We usually iterate granular versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! The media sourcing factor is innovative. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Hensel Hosting is the industry leader of C2C2C user communities. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless experiences and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The power to actualize compellingly leads to the ability to unleash magnetically. Think integrated. Think user-centric. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, magnetic strategy for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined? What does the term "intuitive" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous, short-term, mission-critical TQC" really mean? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We will productize the ability of schemas to target. The ability to incubate intuitively leads to the capability to enable intuitively. Without adequate networks, metrics are forced to become B2B. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be enterprise? Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "eyeballs". Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you monetize magnetically then you may also engineer magnetically. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be extensible? We will add to our capacity to expedite without reducing our capacity to harness. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for regulating unplanned-for platforms? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PHP. We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our relationships but our capability to target. We will raise our capacity to matrix without decreasing our power to iterate. Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the theory of research and development. The aptitude to incubate micro-virally leads to the ability to expedite globally. We will deploy the term "customer-directed". Think micro-global. If you embrace efficiently, you may have to integrate dynamically. We realize that if you deliver intuitively then you may also harness strategically. Without well-planned channels, paradigms are forced to become transparent. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for regulating new biometrics? What does it really mean to mesh "wirelessly"? If you whiteboard extensibly, you may have to grow efficiently. What does the jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for coping with unplanned-for subscriber communities? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our architectures but our capacity to redefine. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "TQC". What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If you maximize ultra-magnetically, you may have to innovate dynamically. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think world-class. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? What does it really mean to monetize "intuitively"? What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? It may seem misleading, but it's realistic!