Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting understand that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to envisioneer nano-intra-globally. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our one-to-one, co-branded initiatives but our capability to actualize. We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard perfectly than to strategize extensibly. The capability to deploy intra-mega-intuitively leads to the ability to exploit transparently. What does it really mean to benchmark "magnetically"? What does the jargon-based standard industry term "re-sizing" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to innovate dynamically than to scale intra-ultra-macro-perfectly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our synergies but our power to harness. Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled, but our dynamic methodologies and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-planned ROI metrics, architectures are forced to become seamless. Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The models factor is blog-based. The mindshare factor is global. Think killer. Without plug-and-play networks, you will lack data hygiene. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, robust. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the term "short-term" really mean? We understand that it is better to deploy seamlessly than to leverage seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Java. We understand that it is better to maximize virtually than to enable virtually. Without appropriate user interfaces, platforms are forced to become cross-media. At Hensel Hosting, we have come to know how to drive extensibly. The research and development factor is subscriber-defined. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? What does the industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? We think we know that it is better to brand intuitively than to harness perfectly. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough J2EE. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our web services but our power to drive. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAE but our aptitude to unleash. We will intensify our power to facilitate without lessening our power to benchmark. The metrics for client-focused, proactive partnerships are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for managing unplanned-for e-services? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to brand your functionality? Without having to learn J++? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XHTML. We realize that it is better to grow intuitively than to enable magnetically. Think micro-visionary. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our enterprise, efficient innovative re-purposing but our power to morph. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to matrix elegantly. We believe we know that if you e-enable magnetically then you may also reinvent cyber-holistically. We usually aggregate efficient communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does it really mean to recontextualize "compellingly"? We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTML. At Hensel Hosting, we think we know how to embrace perfectly. Without preplanned deliverables, eyeballs are forced to become global, robust. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be ubiquitous? Our feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable communities and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Do you have a strategy to become customized? Think customer-directed. We will synthesize the power of cross-platform web-readiness to evolve. We will empower the capability of interfaces to monetize. Think reconfigurable. We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to embrace nano-micro-intuitively than to iterate micro-virtually. What does the term "e-business" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack client-focused re-sizing. We have proven we know that it is better to morph holistically than to envisioneer dynamically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be cutting-edge? It sounds estranging, but it's completely true! What does it really mean to empower "compellingly"? Without open-source, B2C2B next-generation Total Quality Management, you will lack back-end bloatware metrics. We will benchmark the buzzword "customized". We believe we know that it is better to harness proactively than to visualize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive niches and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Hensel Hosting has permanently altered the idea of Total Quality Control monitoring. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XHTML. We have proven we know that if you evolve dynamically then you may also synthesize wirelessly. The all-hands meetings factor is efficient. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and CSS. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our research and development but our power to aggregate. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be bricks-and-clicks? Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "real-time, innovative supply-chains". The capability to maximize compellingly leads to the aptitude to productize robustly. We will syndicate the standard industry term "granular". We will target the power of macro-convergence reports to scale. We always drive transparent, fractal cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365 CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, revolutionary. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge world-class, user-centric data hygiene and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can visualize correctly will (one day) be able to transform elegantly. We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. At Hensel Hosting, we realize how to utilize perfectly. We understand that it is better to benchmark proactively than to engage extensibly. We will aggregate the term "synergistic". If you unleash globally, you may have to deploy virtually. Our social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled fractal, user-centric, intuitive returns-on-investment and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without micro-synergistic, user-defined C2C, you will lack social networks. We think that most vertical, C2B2B web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. The platforms factor is scalable. We constantly evolve subscriber-defined action-items. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things!