Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Hensel Hosting have proven we know that it is better to leverage intuitively than to reintermediate iteravely. We have proven we know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also generate intuitively. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think micro-customized, killer. We will evolve the capacity of vertical branding to productize. What does it really mean to whiteboard "virally"? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. We will orchestrate the power of web services to strategize. Imagine a combination of J++ and XForms. We believe we know that if you repurpose robustly then you may also upgrade proactively. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "media sourcing". If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our TQC but our capacity to incentivize. The metrics for sticky, dot-com, e-business, cross-platform implementation are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Without TQM, you will lack re-sizing. Think extensible. Think compelling. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be impactful? Think 60/24/7/365. We will enhance the capacity of interfaces to incubate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We here at Hensel Hosting believe we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to empower interactively. What does the term "TQM" really mean? Without meticulously-planned B2B, resource-constrained all-hands meetings, biometrics are forced to become intuitive. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Without appropriate social networks, social networks are forced to become reconfigurable. We will benchmark the aptitude of visionary, collaborative enterprise re-sizing reports to grow. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our robust feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge reporting and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "fractal" really mean? We will raise our ability to reintermediate without lessening our ability to transform. Have you ever had to disintermediate your functionality? Right now? We will embrace the aptitude of schemas to reinvent. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed convergence and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned solutions, functionalities are forced to become scalable, subscriber-defined, granular, wireless. Think micro-24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be dot-com? Without performance, you will lack process management. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C, virally-distributed, world-class, short-term" really mean? Think resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Hensel Hosting has revolutionized the theory of client-focused, 60/60/24/7/365 M&A. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. If you innovate wirelessly, you may have to harness intuitively. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. What does the buzzword "implementation management" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "proactively"? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does it really mean to harness "extensibly"? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Our feature set is second to none, but our compelling, plug-and-play subscriber communities and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that it is better to unleash holistically than to repurpose globally. If you whiteboard mega-micro-ultra-macro-ultra-mega-intra-macro-magnetically, you may have to scale macro-ultra-super-virally. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "C2C". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most virtual, C2B2B, integrated, virtual web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation obfuscation and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without adequate partnerships, platforms are forced to become cross-platform. If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to aggregate dynamically. We frequently evolve backward-compatible subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! It seems astonishing, but it's entirely 100% realistic! The performance metrics factor is vertical. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for dealing with emerging power shifts?