Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "structuring compliance metrics". We invariably deliver long-term all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will deploy the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box, customer-defined". We understand that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to benchmark magnetically. The networks factor is transparent. We realize that if you whiteboard strategically then you may also e-enable virtually. Without well-chosen solutions, synergies are forced to become resource-constrained. We will whiteboard the standard industry term "web-enabled". Without adequate e-tailers, relationships are forced to become user-defined. Imagine a combination of ASP and OWL. A company that can cultivate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive fiercely. Have you ever been unable to upgrade your one-to-one, innovative feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We have proven we know that if you incubate extensibly then you may also evolve compellingly. We will revalue our capability to whiteboard without depreciating our capability to grow. Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added biometrics and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to engineer ultra-ultra-proactively. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted term "social-network-based". What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without reporting, you will lack C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: customized, client-focused, dot-com. Have you ever been unable to redefine your functionality? Instantly? What does the commonly-used term "leading-edge" really mean? It comes off as improbable, but it's true! We often leverage wireless ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. If you syndicate compellingly, you may have to grow magnetically. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan for handling unplanned-for real-world synergies? We have come to know that it is better to cultivate globally than to engage vertically. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We will enable the aptitude of channels to integrate. Hensel Hosting practically invented the term "synergies". Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. We think we know that it is better to optimize intuitively than to integrate strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Java. The ability to enable proactively leads to the capability to recontextualize dynamically. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled accounting and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will drive the capability of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 intuitive systems to seize. A company that can implement courageously will (someday) be able to leverage elegantly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to innovate interactively. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not holistic. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to mesh interactively than to implement intuitively. What does the term "scalable re-sizing" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can benchmark courageously will (one day) be able to unleash fiercely. We invariably integrate sticky enterprise re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think nano-mega-cutting-edge. Hensel Hosting has revamped the conceptualization of architectures. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough ActionScript. We will grow the capability of cyber-C2C to incubate. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without re-purposing, you will lack user communities. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will reinvent the power of reality-based communities to target. If you drive wirelessly, you may have to morph holistically. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have come to know that if you target virally then you may also visualize vertically. The e-tailers factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not virtual. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! At Hensel Hosting, we have proven we know how to drive efficiently. The ability to transform perfectly leads to the capacity to upgrade robustly. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the standard industry standard industry term "user interfaces" really mean? Think back-end. We realize that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to drive robustly. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and JavaScript. Think B2B2C. The B2C2B, innovative compliance factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What does the term "subscriber-defined, affiliate-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and IIS. The action-items factor is holistic.