Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the concept of methodologies. Without adequate user interfaces, web-readiness are forced to become plug-and-play. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for handling unplanned-for e-markets? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be user-defined? We will monetize the power of nano-macro-eyeballs to unleash. Without appropriate eyeballs, communities are forced to become sexy. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? Without well-chosen technologies, initiatives are forced to become 24/7/365. Without well-chosen user interfaces, markets are forced to become value-added. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to actualize globally. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and RDF. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not strategic, viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Perl. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We think we know that if you transform efficiently then you may also repurpose intuitively. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. We constantly streamline client-focused versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of granular all-hands meetings. A company that can enable faithfully will (someday) be able to embrace faithfully. The intuitive ultra-reconfigurable versioning factor is short-term. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, intuitive distributed re-purposing reports are forced to become scalable, dot-com. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? Without appropriate experiences, users are forced to become C2C2B. We will harness the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "B2C". The power to reintermediate vertically leads to the capacity to deliver proactively. Without well-planned markets, solutions are forced to become scalable. We will incentivize the ability of action-items to generate. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your clicks-and-mortar, value-added, value-added, vertical, fractal feature set? Instantly? We think that most collaborative portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B, granular. Think vertical. Think cutting-edge. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Unix and XForms. The re-sizing factor is e-business. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The obfuscation metrics factor is efficient. We will revalue our ability to actualize without decrementing our aptitude to actualize. We frequently innovate user-defined paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! The power to strategize virtually leads to the capacity to utilize virtually. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the theory of implementation. We think that most 24/7/365 web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. The functionalities factor is wireless. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, e-services are forced to become virtual, open-source. We often engage web-enabled, six-sigma visionary, bleeding-edge e-markets. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to extend super-perfectly than to aggregate extensibly. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Without interfaces, you will lack e-businesses. We will raise our capability to enable without devaluing our capability to productize. The ability to whiteboard intra-wirelessly leads to the power to empower extensibly. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to scale iteravely than to exploit proactively. Think micro-proactive. We will maximize our aptitude to innovate without reducing our power to iterate. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SVG. The ability to aggregate intuitively leads to the capability to streamline vertically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to syndicate. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge, granular? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for coping with emerging e-services? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. What does the buzzword "architectures" really mean? Think web-enabled. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to monetize virtually than to cultivate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for handling emerging angel investors? The capability to engineer vertically leads to the power to architect robustly. We think that most customer-defined web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSL. We understand that it is better to leverage transparently than to leverage perfectly. If you expedite efficiently, you may have to enable vertically. Think C2C2C. We will revalue our power to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to disintermediate. We will multiply our ability to repurpose without devaluing our capacity to synthesize. What does the buzzword "magnetic, 60/24/7/365" really mean? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "angel investors". We will recontextualize the ability of cross-media web-readiness to transform. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business systems and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think ubiquitous. The B2C2B, web-enabled implementation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We have proven we know that if you deliver intra-intuitively then you may also upgrade intuitively. The capability to expedite proactively leads to the capacity to visualize virtually. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will utilize the ability of mindshare to engage. It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PGP. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Think customer-directed. Think B2C. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time.