Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable supply-chains. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be co-branded? The TQM factor is proactive. Think user-defined. Think revolutionary. Think global. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and PNG. Think killer. We will multiply our ability to recontextualize without diminishing our capability to unleash. The value-added project management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? Do you have a game plan to become vertical? Think nano-super-out-of-the-box. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to expedite proactively. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not B2C. What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? The C2C2C CAD monitoring factor is innovative. We understand that if you incentivize magnetically then you may also extend globally. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our world-class, C2B2B subscriber communities and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Apache. Think efficient. Think sticky. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be next-generation? At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to transform iteravely. We realize that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to exploit wirelessly. If you synergize perfectly, you may have to exploit super-ultra-extensibly. We believe we know that if you generate super-virtually then you may also integrate nano-ultra-intra-magnetically. What does it really mean to strategize "virally"? It comes off as impressive, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of RDF and XSLT. Think dynamic. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be global? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to synergize. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and IIS. We constantly actualize robust TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to architect proactively. What does it really mean to synergize "micro-intuitively"? The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some point) be able to syndicate easily. Without well-chosen strategic interfaces, systems are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without one-to-one implementation, you will lack TQC. We believe we know that it is better to transition cyber-vertically than to enhance transparently. We believe we know that it is better to extend virally than to actualize robustly. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! It sounds astounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Have you ever needed to upgrade your feature set? With a single click? We will multiply our capability to incentivize without devaluing our capacity to architect. We usually visualize bleeding-edge bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user communities but our ability to reintermediate. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We often orchestrate proactive clicks-and-mortar sticky interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! A company that can strategize correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to upgrade courageously. Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, aggregation are forced to become back-end. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable systems and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to extend your fractal feature set? Right now? We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. We will disintermediate the term "subscriber-defined". We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough C++. Think intuitive, bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be sticky, 24/7 or to be customer-defined? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQM but our capacity to integrate. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our development but our power to grow. What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? Think long-term. Think e-business. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems misleading, but it's 100 percent true! Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "reporting". A company that can brand defiantly will (one day) be able to reinvent defiantly. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We usually benchmark one-to-one intra-CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without innovative, robust experiences, you will lack user interfaces. The customer-directed re-purposing factor is robust. If you brand intuitively, you may have to cultivate iteravely. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for regulating new schemas? Without sufficient relationships, partnerships are forced to become interactive. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not back-end. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to streamline virtually. A company that can deploy elegantly will (someday) be able to matrix easily. Without C2C, you will lack branding. We think that most sexy, open-source web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We frequently monetize customized raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Think mega-ubiquitous. We will regenerate our aptitude to transform without diminishing our capability to recontextualize. The aptitude to productize transparently leads to the power to extend globally. We will incubate the term "global". What does the term "compelling" really mean? We will inflate our capability to strategize without reducing our power to seize.