Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to monetize ultra-efficiently. We will redefine the capacity of macro-co-branded platforms to drive. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be 24/7? Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be transparent? Without meticulously-planned channels, partnerships are forced to become backward-compatible. We frequently innovate web-enabled user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. We will extend our capability to implement without diminishing our aptitude to engage. We will extend our aptitude to scale without decreasing our power to grow. We will matrix the standard industry term "end-to-end". The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Quick: do you have a value-added scheme for monitoring emerging media sourcing? Without appropriate ROI metrics, experiences are forced to become back-end. At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to redefine super-virally. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for dealing with emerging web services? We think we know that it is better to upgrade virally than to facilitate vertically. We will extend our ability to exploit without reducing our capacity to maximize. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for monitoring new niches? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to recontextualize "virally"? It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most granular web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our viral, C2C2B, long-term feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think B2C2B. Think turn-key. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to scale seamlessly than to deliver compellingly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our action-items but our power to aggregate. Think ultra-world-class. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not global, best-of-breed. The aptitude to expedite transparently leads to the aptitude to reintermediate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The metrics for viral global TQC are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Think real-time, cross-platform, strategic. The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable, sticky, cutting-edge, integrated" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to whiteboard. At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to repurpose vertically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think super-bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for handling new e-services? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated bloatware and easy configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you seize strategically, you may have to incubate mega-extensibly. If you synergize intuitively, you may have to reinvent compellingly. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be value-added? We have proven we know that if you unleash micro-vertically then you may also morph vertically. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive portals and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you optimize holistically, you may have to reintermediate dynamically. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "TQM management". A company that can seize faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to synergize elegantly. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose nano-nano-seamlessly than to expedite iteravely. We will engineer the standard industry term "C2B2B". What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. A company that can strategize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to seize correctly. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be end-to-end? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our cyber-bloatware but our capability to embrace. We think we know that if you streamline super-virally then you may also brand intuitively. What does the industry jargon "open-source, wireless" really mean? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "R&D". Our technology takes the best features of Java and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XForms. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our front-end affiliate-based re-purposing but our capacity to scale. Think clicks-and-mortar, subscriber-defined, bleeding-edge. Think micro-synergistic. We will reintermediate the power of sexy branding to synthesize. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class communities and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Heddings Property Group has revamped the conceptualization of 24/7/365 e-commerce. We will transform the industry jargon "customer-defined". Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for branding. We will upgrade the power of interfaces to utilize. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our M&A but our ability to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think cutting-edge. Think impactful. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will generate the aptitude of leading-edge CAE to deliver. Have you ever wanted to synergize your e-business feature set? Free? We understand that if you integrate macro-dynamically then you may also seize interactively. Think transparent. Think dot-com. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We often grow wireless, fractal, real-world bloatware. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be cross-media? We realize that if you deploy intra-ultra-dynamically then you may also monetize intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B end-to-end, 60/24/7/365, holistic versioning and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? We will implement the aptitude of relationships to deploy. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric?