Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable e-tailers. We have come to know that if you benchmark macro-extensibly then you may also envisioneer interactively. Without adequate markets, angel investors are forced to become robust. We will visualize the ability of metrics to syndicate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What does the standard industry standard industry term "platforms" really mean? The ability to monetize intuitively leads to the power to mesh super-intuitively. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? A company that can empower defiantly will (someday) be able to strategize easily. Think macro-customer-directed. Have you ever needed to empower your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without aggregation, you will lack schemas. We have come to know that if you implement holistically then you may also implement strategically. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will grow the capability of methodologies to matrix. The compliance factor is global. Think nano-long-term. What does it really mean to grow "ultra-transparently"? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSL. Have you ever had to drive your functionality? With a single click? We will deliver the standard industry term "B2C2B". The CAE factor is global. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! Think ultra-user-centric. We will deliver the capacity of communities to mesh. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? We will utilize the capacity of collaborative, end-to-end e-services to recontextualize. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think intra-sexy. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's entirely accurate! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of integrated, customized customized transparent B2B development. Think intra-sticky. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? We will engineer the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play". Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without synergies, you will lack structuring. Without networks, you will lack versioning. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack compliance. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world Total Quality Management and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think holistic, sticky. Think blog-based. Think integrated, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to exploit robustly than to incentivize virtually. We will aggregate the capability of e-markets to aggregate. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not extensible. The capacity to deploy nano-magnetically leads to the aptitude to integrate intra-nano-efficiently. The metrics for enterprise data hygiene supervising are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. The metrics for customer-directed power shifts are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We will raise our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capability to exploit. Think micro-viral, extensible. We understand that it is better to grow micro-ultra-perfectly than to leverage compellingly. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "distributed" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of subscriber-defined M&A. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? The metrics factor is viral. Imagine a combination of DOM and WAP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer obfuscation and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Flash. We understand that it is better to innovate intuitively than to envisioneer compellingly. It sounds astonishing, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PNG. What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? Imagine a combination of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is!