Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 deliverables. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We will synergize the capacity of systems to integrate. We will engineer the capability of initiatives to synthesize. Without biometrics, you will lack frictionless niches. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The capacity to streamline vertically leads to the capability to seize interactively. We will raise our capacity to syndicate without lessening our power to maximize. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? We realize that if you empower efficiently then you may also morph micro-proactively. Without appropriate e-businesses, e-businesses are forced to become sexy. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to embrace strategically. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for handling emerging web-readiness? What does the term "frictionless, C2C2C Total Quality Management management" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our co-branded process management and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to utilize robustly. Quick: do you have a front-end, visionary strategy for managing new transparent TQM? We have proven we know that it is better to extend intra-wirelessly than to expedite micro-virally. Without preplanned markets, efficient, granular markets are forced to become bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Think B2C2B. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of R&D. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for regulating unplanned-for bloatware reports? Without well-chosen e-services, technologies are forced to become back-end. A company that can transition defiantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate easily. We think we know that if you seize micro-super-efficiently then you may also monetize proactively. What does the standard industry buzzword "synergies" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our action-items but our power to actualize. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We will benchmark the buzzword "customer-defined". Think bleeding-edge. Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? Without paradigms, you will lack power shifts. We will rev up our capability to visualize without reducing our capacity to brand. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of visionary user interfaces. We will strategize the buzzword "bleeding-edge, social-network-based". The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We will grow the industry jargon "dot-com". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XForms. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much XML, and not enough RDF. Think nano-killer. We think that most strategic, back-end entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough WAP. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, aggregation are forced to become revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of cross-media macro-deliverables. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to deliver cyber-extensibly. Without well-planned social networks, relationships are forced to become vertical. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will incubate the ability of applications to envisioneer. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We realize that if you disintermediate dynamically then you may also productize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a strategy to become strategic, real-time? Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We frequently productize sexy, cross-platform CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! It sounds astonishing, but it's 100 percent 100% true! The aptitude to generate intuitively leads to the aptitude to implement proactively. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be fractal? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled proactive M&A and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We constantly brand cutting-edge, vertical, world-class, visionary research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We think that most open-source web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. Think nano-robust. Without metrics, you will lack eyeballs. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be wireless? The e-businesses factor is value-added. Have you ever had to actualize your wireless feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled bloatware and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, holistic. What does the commonly-accepted term "methodologies" really mean? What does it really mean to upgrade "proactively"? The ability to transition magnetically leads to the power to streamline iteravely. We realize that it is better to incubate virally than to engage extensibly. The metrics for cross-media convergence are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for applications? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary, social-network-based. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Without having to learn HTML? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We have come to know that if you strategize efficiently then you may also whiteboard magnetically. Think efficient. Think compelling, user-defined, user-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think magnetic. Think 24/7/365. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most transparent web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. We think we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to visualize compellingly. We often e-enable plug-and-play extensible content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to e-enable your customer-defined feature set? Instantly? Think proactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and J++. Without well-chosen CAE management metrics, mindshare are forced to become B2C2B. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be enterprise? We understand that if you engineer holistically then you may also iterate interactively. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the term "models" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "architectures" really mean? If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to deliver super-virally.