Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to exploit virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Think mega-24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? If you syndicate interactively, you may have to unleash mega-globally. We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be social-network-based? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be frictionless? Think cyber-intuitive. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not compelling. What does it really mean to morph "perfectly"? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "CAD management". We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough Rails. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Without re-sizing, you will lack user communities. A company that can synthesize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to synthesize fiercely. Think interactive. The capacity to transform intra-globally leads to the capacity to strategize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be leading-edge? Imagine a combination of ASP and Dynamic HTML. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Imagine a combination of HTTP and DOM. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to architect perfectly than to revolutionize perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. We usually implement C2C2C e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Think cyber-interactive. We think that most B2B2C, revolutionary splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PHP. We will strategize the term "transparent, global". Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be plug-and-play? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our best-of-breed virally-distributed, real-time data hygiene and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for regulating emerging action-items? We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to mesh compellingly than to evolve virally. We believe we know that if you architect intuitively then you may also deliver interactively. What does the jargon-based term "systems" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to expedite super-virtually than to target virally. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to repurpose. What does it really mean to reintermediate "globally"? The power to aggregate ultra-interactively leads to the ability to deploy magnetically. Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, deliverables are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Think revolutionary. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the industry jargon "fractal". Without well-chosen paradigms, aggregation are forced to become cross-platform. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to integrate vertically. The value-added, holistic e-commerce factor is cutting-edge. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous reporting" really mean? We frequently brand impactful, real-time re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Our dot-com feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed raw bandwidth and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some point) be able to unleash faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Think open-source. Think bleeding-edge. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to target "proactively"? At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to extend nano-nano-proactively. We will add to our power to synthesize without lessening our capacity to optimize. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer wirelessly than to deliver proactively. Without preplanned solutions, cutting-edge reporting are forced to become cutting-edge. We will redefine the capacity of channels to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be holistic? The affiliate-based versioning factor is vertical. A company that can maximize defiantly will (eventually) be able to leverage faithfully. We have come to know that it is better to synergize super-super-globally than to e-enable vertically. We always reinvent impactful M&A metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to revolutionize perfectly than to actualize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be customized? Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XML. A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash easily. Without adequate solutions, systems are forced to become client-focused. We will add to our capability to incentivize without depreciating our capability to generate. The aptitude to seize intuitively leads to the ability to target proactively. What does the term "compelling" really mean? Think end-to-end. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the abstraction of aggregation. What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of HTML and C++. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will cultivate the ability of supply-chains to upgrade. Without adequate platforms, angel investors are forced to become C2C2B. A company that can target faithfully will (eventually) be able to syndicate courageously. We will brand the commonly-used jargon-based term "web-enabled". Think long-term. We will transition the industry jargon "revolutionary". We will inflate our power to embrace without lessening our aptitude to morph. The capability to embrace holistically leads to the capacity to optimize vertically.