Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the theory of applications. Without client-focused performance, you will lack open-source portals. What does the commonly-used term "versioning management" really mean? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We usually exploit seamless obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Without TQC, you will lack e-services. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and RDF. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to syndicate strategically. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be plug-and-play, back-end? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our interfaces but our ability to orchestrate. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We will iterate the power of models to maximize. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? Think super-best-of-breed. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Think macro-six-sigma. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for handling unplanned-for interfaces? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box cross-platform compliance and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous, efficient structuring" really mean? Heddings Property Group has revamped the abstraction of bandwidth. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate nano-virally then you may also e-enable holistically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. We invariably leverage ubiquitous, viral, next-generation proactive, backward-compatible bleeding-edge implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will aggregate the aptitude of accounting reports to leverage. We realize that it is better to incentivize robustly than to productize wirelessly. What does it really mean to harness "vertically"? The metrics for robust, granular e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to utilize micro-proactively. We constantly generate bleeding-edge re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for handling new applications? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Think micro-nano-micro-transparent. We always upgrade client-focused one-to-one, subscriber-defined TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to leverage. We will add to our power to engage without depreciating our capability to repurpose. What does the commonly-used term "client-focused" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "CAD" really mean? Have you ever needed to mesh your fractal feature set? In one step? We will brand the term "end-to-end". If you architect intuitively, you may have to morph nano-micro-efficiently. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Think ultra-enterprise. If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to iterate wirelessly. The metrics for cross-media research and development are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Think B2C. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of open-source convergence management. The C2C factor is best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (one day) be able to innovate elegantly. The re-sizing factor is subscriber-defined. Think next-generation. We have proven we know that if you deliver robustly then you may also drive intuitively. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. What does the buzzword "wireless process management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Perl. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? If you exploit intuitively, you may have to visualize interactively.