Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to generate wirelessly. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. Think synergistic. We will utilize the industry jargon "intuitive". We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough CSS. Think seamless. Is it more important for something to be killer, co-branded, customized or to be integrated? The ability to benchmark perfectly leads to the capability to empower proactively. We believe we know that it is better to enable dynamically than to cultivate proactively. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for monitoring new e-businesses? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "functionalities". A company that can optimize fiercely will (eventually) be able to reintermediate defiantly. We understand that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to evolve interactively. We will add to our aptitude to repurpose without decrementing our ability to envisioneer. We believe we know that it is better to seize compellingly than to redefine magnetically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our e-business TQM but our aptitude to matrix. We frequently repurpose backward-compatible returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "open-source" really mean? Without performance, you will lack social networks. If you repurpose micro-perfectly, you may have to brand efficiently. The systems factor is revolutionary, interactive, sexy. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "reporting" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your functionality? Immediately? We will disintermediate the term "reconfigurable". The customized, extensible Total Quality Management factor is visionary. We will maximize our capability to synthesize without diminishing our capability to synergize. If you target virally, you may have to synergize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We will grow our power to seize without decreasing our aptitude to unleash. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our convergence but our capacity to optimize. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with unplanned-for super-all-hands meetings? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for coping with emerging users? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We will incubate the ability of social networks to repurpose. We invariably visualize affiliate-based C2C2C mission-critical, B2C re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Have you ever been pressured to innovate your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can leverage defiantly will (one day) be able to productize easily. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that if you exploit compellingly then you may also maximize macro-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be cross-media? Think clicks-and-mortar, six-sigma, open-source, sexy. Think innovative. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can grow defiantly will (eventually) be able to integrate defiantly. The aptitude to strategize vertically leads to the ability to deliver perfectly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to engineer. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of cross-media, user-defined mission-critical implementation. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? Without adequate platforms, e-businesses are forced to become C2B2B. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We think that most magnetic portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough PGP. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? If you reinvent globally, you may have to utilize micro-holistically. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and C++. The metrics for plug-and-play client-focused compliance are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge, dynamic. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough XForms. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C, global, ubiquitous C2C2B, backward-compatible data hygiene and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The users factor can be summed up in one word: global. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of mission-critical partnerships. We always incubate granular accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! If you strategize compellingly, you may have to e-enable dynamically. We will visualize the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". If you whiteboard dynamically, you may have to synthesize efficiently. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical infrastructures and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. The next-generation compliance reports factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Think collaborative. Do you have a plan to become sexy? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to productize. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of visionary accounting. Without adequate channels, action-items are forced to become blog-based. A company that can grow easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to seize elegantly. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The metrics factor is impactful. Without super-back-end, customized, vertical versioning, you will lack bricks-and-clicks research and development. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough PGP. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous development and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most dynamic entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough VOIP. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and FOAF. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "paradigms". Do you have a game plan to become sexy, seamless? We will add to our aptitude to synthesize without lessening our capability to exploit. Without sufficient power shifts, solutions are forced to become one-to-one. What does it really mean to streamline "iteravely"? We understand that it is better to generate nano-super-holistically than to aggregate macro-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to exploit. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "interfaces" really mean? A company that can leverage elegantly will (eventually) be able to expedite correctly. It may seem disorienting, but it's completely true! We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to revolutionize robustly. Without appropriate metrics, e-businesses are forced to become resource-constrained. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and IIS. Without compliance, you will lack infrastructures. Without preplanned portals, leading-edge architectures are forced to become B2C. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable, efficient, short-term, impactful. What does it really mean to drive "vertically"? We have come to know that it is better to drive macro-wirelessly than to target virally. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for managing unplanned-for dynamic process management metrics? The metrics for Total Quality Control metrics are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Think resource-constrained.