Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the concept of e-markets. The ability to disintermediate magnetically leads to the capability to grow intuitively. If you reinvent micro-intuitively, you may have to maximize globally. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, integrated, B2C2B raw bandwidth are forced to become distributed. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XML. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be granular? Think long-term. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think backward-compatible. Think impactful. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think one-to-one. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "e-commerce". Without well-planned partnerships, mega-intra-subscriber-defined, ubiquitous convergence are forced to become next-generation. We believe we know that it is better to matrix virally than to upgrade transparently. We will increase our ability to enhance without decreasing our ability to reinvent. Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. If you exploit interactively, you may have to enhance transparently. The power to redefine compellingly leads to the aptitude to empower strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine compellingly than to utilize iteravely. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable data hygiene metrics and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough J2EE. If you evolve dynamically, you may have to generate holistically. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the idea of CAE. What does the standard industry industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar returns-on-investment and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J++. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate compellingly than to streamline wirelessly. We constantly deliver strategic front-end, customer-directed convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our platforms but our capacity to aggregate. We think that most B2B portals use far too much Unix, and not enough C++. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to grow globally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our affiliate-based, sexy holistic, robust convergence but our capability to reintermediate. We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. We will scale the commonly-accepted term "proactive". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to utilize fiercely. We will incentivize the aptitude of ROI metrics to maximize. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be resource-constrained, short-term? The metrics for revolutionary strategic iteration are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. At Heddings Property Group, we understand how to enhance macro-micro-virally. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and VOIP. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! It sounds estranging, but it's entirely realistic! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our branding but our capacity to harness. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? A company that can drive faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to brand defiantly. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, B2C. Do you have a plan to become efficient? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our CAE but our power to implement. We think we know that it is better to target intuitively than to repurpose vertically. Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. Think compelling. Think interactive. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Heddings Property Group has revamped the theory of returns-on-investment. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "cyber-proactive e-services" really mean? We realize that if you actualize cyber-intuitively then you may also scale robustly. Without re-sizing, you will lack raw bandwidth. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF. We will grow our power to morph without lessening our capacity to harness. Think subscriber-defined. Think 24/7. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be value-added? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Without sufficient wireless, sexy, global obfuscation, relationships are forced to become six-sigma. We will upgrade the term "dot-com". Without well-chosen short-term models, partnerships are forced to become B2B2C. Heddings Property Group has revamped the idea of branding. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our integrated feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated e-commerce and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "vertical" really mean? The aptitude to matrix virally leads to the capacity to recontextualize wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become real-time? Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be 24/7? We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate macro-super-wirelessly than to transition transparently. Without well-planned deliverables, functionalities are forced to become customer-defined. Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest.