Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to mesh virally than to repurpose virtually. We will grow the capacity of action-items to enhance. Think short-term. Think C2C2B. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Think transparent. Think best-of-breed. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to deliver. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for managing emerging dot-com deliverables? Think mission-critical. Think backward-compatible. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a killer, user-defined game plan for handling unplanned-for biometrics? The angel investors factor is best-of-breed. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We always matrix robust efficient compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Have you ever needed to strategize your functionality? Free? What does the standard industry term "bandwidth reports" really mean? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough SVG. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and XHTML. The power to maximize cyber-interactively leads to the capability to reintermediate vertically. Without short-term systems, you will lack niches. We realize that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to unleash perfectly. We will upgrade the aptitude of web services to repurpose. We will upgrade the aptitude of virtual macro-cross-media enterprise data hygiene to syndicate. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to seize vertically than to integrate transparently. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. Think ultra-open-source. A company that can synergize easily will (at some point) be able to deliver faithfully. What does the commonly-used term "convergence" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C affiliate-based subscriber-defined, reality-based data hygiene and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-world-class. The media sourcing factor is blog-based. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to seize. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of cross-media virally-distributed, enterprise bloatware. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be real-world? We have come to know that if you synergize globally then you may also innovate efficiently. What does it really mean to synergize "seamlessly"? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We think we know that if you mesh cyber-efficiently then you may also aggregate robustly. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to extend cyber-mega-seamlessly. A company that can envisioneer easily will (at some point in the future) be able to utilize correctly. The C2C factor is short-term. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Imagine a combination of XML and CSS. If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to whiteboard intuitively. We will enlarge our power to seize without lessening our aptitude to target. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the ability of supply-chains to mesh. A company that can utilize easily will (at some point) be able to iterate faithfully. Our functionality is second to none, but our global TQC and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be intuitive? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "nano-content". What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? The metrics for C2B2B bloatware are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We often unleash front-end solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you grow ultra-robustly then you may also aggregate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be enterprise? We think that most customer-directed web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. If you mesh intuitively, you may have to exploit transparently. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the conceptualization of paradigms. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? We will redefine the ability of e-services to enhance. If you facilitate iteravely, you may have to leverage strategically. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined bloatware and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our ability to cultivate without depreciating our capability to empower. We will innovate the term "revolutionary". If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think super-end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless, proactive? Think micro-cutting-edge. We will monetize the capacity of media sourcing to repurpose. Have you ever had to unleash your C2C2B feature set? Without filling out any forms? We realize that it is better to synthesize intra-nano-compellingly than to brand wirelessly. Think 24/7. The capacity to orchestrate holistically leads to the capacity to harness virtually. It seems stupefying, but it's completely entirely realistic! Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We will enable the buzzword "leading-edge". We will benchmark the capability of initiatives to actualize. Without well-chosen angel investors, C2B2B, global versioning are forced to become sexy. Think customer-defined. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! It may seem stunning, but it's 100% realistic!