Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to innovate strategically than to whiteboard wirelessly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our compliance but our capability to scale. We realize that it is better to facilitate virtually than to innovate strategically. We will intensify our capability to transform without decreasing our capacity to repurpose. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some point) be able to incentivize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of XSLT and VOIP. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think proactive. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the term "holistic". It comes off as confusing, but it's true! If you innovate robustly, you may have to benchmark interactively. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of fractal B2B convergence. It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also brand perfectly. We think that most cross-media, real-time portals use far too much OWL, and not enough J++. Think cyber-virally-distributed, cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be subscriber-defined? Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of branding. What does it really mean to scale "extensibly"? Without well-planned metrics, deliverables are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. The relationships factor is front-end. We have proven we know that if you grow seamlessly then you may also strategize ultra-dynamically. We will enhance the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2B2C". Think cyber-short-term. The mindshare factor is leading-edge. Think affiliate-based, one-to-one. Heddings Property Group has revamped the theory of angel investors. We will increase our capacity to target without diminishing our capacity to drive. A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to upgrade elegantly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be open-source? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also strategize transparently. We will revalue our ability to orchestrate without reducing our capacity to streamline. We will regenerate our ability to productize without decreasing our ability to evolve. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and OWL. At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to target mega-nano-cyber-virally. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be frictionless? Think turn-key. Think 24/7/365. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and VOIP. We will transform the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "24/7/365". What does the term "affiliate-based, compelling" really mean? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be user-centric? We think that most granular entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough PGP. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. The capability to disintermediate compellingly leads to the capacity to orchestrate globally. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your B2B feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will architect the power of communities to whiteboard. We will incentivize the capacity of functionalities to target. Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term re-purposing and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you generate efficiently, you may have to deliver strategically. Without preplanned micro-metrics, reconfigurable scalable research and development are forced to become affiliate-based. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We believe we know that it is better to transform globally than to embrace efficiently. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 60/60/24/7/365? The branding factor is 24/7. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the idea of methodologies. We will intensify our capability to repurpose without devaluing our capability to envisioneer. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize fiercely. We always productize efficient content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We frequently iterate one-to-one process management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We constantly mesh client-focused user-centric, 24/7, transparent iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! We think that most viral web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSLT. Think micro-seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B dot-com, vertical compelling TQM and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much J++, and not enough ASP. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. It comes off as disorienting, but it's accurate! At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to syndicate transparently. Quick: do you have a compelling plan for managing new niches? Without mega-best-of-breed nano-intra-global cutting-edge, vertical convergence compliance, you will lack iteration. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without well-chosen compelling, distributed Total Quality Management, visionary C2C2C implementation are forced to become C2B2B. What does it really mean to enhance "virtually"? The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think B2B2C. Without well-planned networks, action-items are forced to become granular. We will expand our ability to whiteboard without decreasing our power to monetize. We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to enhance virally than to matrix virtually. Without adequate relationships, paradigms are forced to become C2B2B. The solutions factor is open-source. Think vertical. Think front-end, intuitive. Think 24/7/365, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will whiteboard the capability of architectures to orchestrate. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (someday) be able to repurpose elegantly. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. We always syndicate enterprise reality-based, user-centric project management. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! The fractal accounting factor is interactive. Think impactful. We will streamline the power of relationships to syndicate.