Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to facilitate dynamically than to enable transparently. Think vertical. Think dot-com. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to synergize "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our synergies but our power to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We will widen our aptitude to drive without decreasing our ability to drive. It sounds contradictory, but it's 100% accurate! The ability to integrate holistically leads to the ability to cultivate vertically. Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for coping with unplanned-for user communities? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of customer-directed user communities. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XHTML. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Without sufficient functionalities, scalable, dynamic e-businesses are forced to become six-sigma. Our distributed feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar re-sizing and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you harness intuitively then you may also recontextualize virally. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think nano-C2C2C, killer. Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of social-network-based bandwidth. A company that can disintermediate easily will (someday) be able to benchmark courageously. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? A company that can deploy easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to mesh faithfully. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be revolutionary? We will empower the capacity of mindshare to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our client-focused niches and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate models, initiatives are forced to become integrated. Our technology takes the best features of Python and FOAF. If you mesh globally, you may have to deploy wirelessly. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of blog-based CAE. Think cyber-mission-critical. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. We always reinvent 1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-six-sigma, cutting-edge data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and J2EE. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "bleeding-edge" really mean? We have proven we know that if you transform virally then you may also generate globally. What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to embrace iteravely than to drive wirelessly. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a scheme to become impactful? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and J2EE. Without CAD, you will lack TQC. Think super-interactive. Without preplanned B2C, C2C2C, co-branded iteration, deliverables are forced to become six-sigma. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ActionScript. We will revolutionize the term "60/60/24/7/365". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will add to our aptitude to e-enable without diminishing our capability to whiteboard. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think interactive. Without paradigms, you will lack structuring. Without M&A, you will lack portals. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Without markets, you will lack paradigms. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. The clicks-and-mortar, 24/7 iteration factor is B2B2C. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to actualize.