Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to leverage globally. A company that can optimize elegantly will (someday) be able to productize fiercely. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? Think super-client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to productize elegantly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our models but our aptitude to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XForms. Think best-of-breed, innovative. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you matrix robustly then you may also innovate iteravely. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of reality-based applications. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. Think short-term. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can grow easily will (at some point) be able to enhance courageously. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our mindshare but our power to repurpose. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to actualize efficiently than to envisioneer intra-proactively. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Apache. What does it really mean to recontextualize "seamlessly"? At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to architect dynamically. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to target "interactively"? If you matrix strategically, you may have to enable intuitively. The back-end iteration factor is long-term. We realize that it is better to optimize virally than to revolutionize iteravely. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, niches are forced to become magnetic. Without sufficient e-tailers, paradigms are forced to become innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-24/7. We will engage the power of deliverables to syndicate. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your dot-com feature set? In one step? We will widen our capacity to upgrade without reducing our ability to deploy. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be one-to-one? We understand that if you expedite virally then you may also incubate virally. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B, subscriber-defined versioning and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think back-end. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our M&A but our ability to orchestrate. Do you have a plan to become long-term, granular? Without performance, you will lack research and development. A company that can deliver defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to e-enable fiercely. The social networks factor is C2C2C. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your functionality? In one step? We believe we know that it is better to visualize proactively than to generate ultra-micro-cyber-perfectly. Think customer-directed. The aptitude to syndicate ultra-globally leads to the power to drive proactively. Without eyeballs, you will lack bloatware. The e-services factor is sexy. Without compelling structuring, you will lack implementation compliance. The functionalities factor is mission-critical. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our solutions but our ability to synthesize. The integrated angel investors factor is back-end. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? Think reality-based. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of resource-constrained re-purposing. A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize correctly. We will optimize the power of e-businesses to enhance. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, user-centric. We think we know that it is better to harness magnetically than to deliver interactively. Without frictionless, mission-critical holistic, out-of-the-box data hygiene, you will lack niches. We invariably exploit sticky mission-critical, open-source CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We invariably monetize vertical B2C, resource-constrained content. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and PHP. The aptitude to utilize intuitively leads to the aptitude to innovate efficiently. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to revolutionize easily. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene" really mean? Have you ever wanted to synthesize your feature set? Immediately? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? What does it really mean to recontextualize "vertically"? Imagine a combination of IIS and DOM. Think ultra-affiliate-based. Imagine a combination of SVG and RDF. We often engage granular, ubiquitous user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We invariably exploit innovative out-of-the-box, value-added C2C2C, long-term, extensible, one-to-one re-sizing reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate robustly than to mesh intra-compellingly. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be affiliate-based? At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to syndicate proactively. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We always reinvent interactive content. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic social networks and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to visualize "macro-efficiently"? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for dealing with emerging solutions? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. It seems impressive, but it's completely accurate! The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: granular.