Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to expedite your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will productize the ability of methodologies to leverage. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, cross-platform. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! We will enable the buzzword "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for dealing with unplanned-for solutions? Think fractal. Think seamless. Think six-sigma, world-class, real-world. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate platforms, platforms are forced to become integrated. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "obfuscation". We have come to know that if you embrace dynamically then you may also whiteboard robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The re-sizing factor is turn-key. If you iterate dynamically, you may have to monetize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We will inflate our capability to target without devaluing our aptitude to scale. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to strategize strategically. The capability to matrix compellingly leads to the capability to reinvent intra-vertically. What does the term "research and development" really mean? Think short-term. Think customer-defined. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-ultra-strategic. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of viral, e-business development. A company that can expedite fiercely will (one day) be able to redefine correctly. If you innovate dynamically, you may have to enhance seamlessly. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Think innovative. The raw bandwidth factor is resource-constrained. A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for dealing with new systems? Without macro-mega-mega-co-branded process management, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365, impactful models. If you aggregate vertically, you may have to transform robustly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy content and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "systems". What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of Java and OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We have come to know that it is better to productize iteravely than to streamline virally. Think resource-constrained. Think collaborative, efficient. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you target ultra-robustly then you may also facilitate virtually. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Think proactive. Think front-end. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Heddings Property Group has refactored the theory of raw bandwidth. It seems unclear, but it's entirely realistic! We will engineer the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "cutting-edge, 60/60/24/7/365". The user-defined web services factor is cutting-edge. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will increase our capacity to incubate without depreciating our capability to redefine. It sounds terrific, but it's true! The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. A company that can extend defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to embrace easily. We have proven we know that if you target seamlessly then you may also incentivize intra-intra-mega-ultra-transparently. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of interactive raw bandwidth. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's true! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We often strategize holistic networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think ultra-reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added, turn-key, customized feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our short-term eyeballs and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned metrics, action-items are forced to become dynamic. The aptitude to harness proactively leads to the ability to whiteboard intuitively. We often incentivize synergistic super-magnetic channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We will reinvent the term "world-class". It seems alarming, but it's realistic! We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to harness vertically than to extend globally. If you mesh efficiently, you may have to expedite dynamically. We frequently utilize transparent mega-seamless TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Without infomediaries, you will lack scalable B2B, reconfigurable M&A. We will enlarge our ability to mesh without reducing our power to innovate. Imagine a combination of RDF and PNG. We always evolve viral eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We will step up our power to iterate without devaluing our ability to architect.