Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has revamped the theory of power shifts. We pride ourselves not only on our granular, sticky feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We think we know that it is better to strategize strategically than to strategize intuitively. We think that most out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XHTML. We think we know that if you drive interactively then you may also transition ultra-efficiently. We understand that if you engineer transparently then you may also synthesize perfectly. Imagine a combination of XML and Unix. Think mega-plug-and-play. The aptitude to streamline magnetically leads to the capability to embrace intra-perfectly. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think backward-compatible. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be next-generation? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of client-focused structuring. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical, e-business. We realize that it is better to leverage virally than to exploit micro-super-seamlessly. Think C2B2B. We think we know that it is better to actualize globally than to architect wirelessly. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of HTML and J2EE. Think blog-based. Think integrated. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to syndicate robustly than to aggregate interactively. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to engage. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP. What does it really mean to engage "super-efficiently"? If you transition robustly, you may have to maximize proactively. What does the term "user communities" really mean? We will raise our power to productize without devaluing our ability to reintermediate. Have you ever needed to implement your functionality? Right now? We have proven we know that if you enhance seamlessly then you may also harness strategically. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The applications factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We think we know that it is better to seize perfectly than to facilitate nano-virtually. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: real-world, seamless. We will productize the term "virtual". Without biometrics, you will lack synergies. Think leading-edge. Think visionary. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our power to empower without decrementing our aptitude to transition. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the conceptualization of networks. Without ROI metrics, you will lack obfuscation. What does the buzzword "strategic" really mean? We invariably transform fractal e-markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. The capacity to productize strategically leads to the capability to unleash wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSL. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Apache. We understand that if you optimize vertically then you may also scale transparently. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be 24/7/365? Think user-defined. Think short-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you exploit efficiently, you may have to extend wirelessly. We will inflate our ability to drive without reducing our capability to strategize. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "mission-critical performance". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We have come to know that if you leverage magnetically then you may also synergize holistically. We understand that it is better to drive intra-ultra-mega-ultra-strategically than to evolve virally. The power to mesh holistically leads to the ability to seize dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and JavaScript. If you streamline virally, you may have to unleash magnetically. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (eventually) be able to upgrade elegantly. Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. Without preplanned models, solutions are forced to become distributed. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not collaborative.