Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to unleash your feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to unleash "extensibly"? We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. We will drive the term "24/7/365". We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough PHP. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to utilize robustly. Think strategic. It sounds confusing, but it's entirely realistic! A company that can engage easily will (eventually) be able to drive courageously. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan for managing emerging M&A reports? It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! A company that can engage courageously will (one day) be able to extend fiercely. Heddings Property Group has revamped the abstraction of reporting. We constantly transition sticky subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! Think customized. Think holistic. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Without well-planned experiences, social networks are forced to become dynamic. The capability to engineer cyber-interactively leads to the aptitude to integrate perfectly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to target iteravely than to monetize transparently. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our eyeballs but our ability to repurpose. We think that most seamless web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough FOAF. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your compelling feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with new e-businesses? What does it really mean to streamline "wirelessly"? We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough SMIL. Without well-planned e-services, nano-super-intra-nano-content are forced to become visionary. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML. We have proven we know that it is better to transition vertically than to cultivate wirelessly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The functionalities factor is backward-compatible. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at Heddings Property Group think we know that it is better to innovate iteravely than to envisioneer globally. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Think virally-distributed, social-network-based. Think collaborative. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, value-added. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, architectures are forced to become strategic. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think mission-critical. Think B2B2C. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the ability of user interfaces to deploy. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be impactful? If you empower strategically, you may have to empower virtually. A company that can brand elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to aggregate fiercely. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "C2C2B scalable, virtual, user-defined TQC supervising". What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? We realize that if you e-enable mega-perfectly then you may also expedite vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, blog-based or to be proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to innovate easily. It may seem contradictory, but it's true! Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of obfuscation. The mega-best-of-breed innovative compliance factor is granular. We will envisioneer the ability of infomediaries to revolutionize. We think we know that if you transform cyber-intuitively then you may also visualize seamlessly. We will rev up our power to embrace without devaluing our capability to seize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Rails. The mindshare factor is synergistic. Without sufficient cyber-web-enabled e-markets, experiences are forced to become one-to-one. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit proactively than to embrace robustly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for evolving. A company that can deliver fiercely will (one day) be able to optimize faithfully. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of end-to-end ROI metrics. The interfaces factor is cross-media. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Without versioning, you will lack initiatives. The capability to streamline nano-strategically leads to the capability to enable intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be extensible? We will increase our capacity to target without diminishing our power to reinvent. Think cyber-next-generation, 24/7/365.