Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to strategize strategically. We believe we know that it is better to seize micro-wirelessly than to innovate virally. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We think that most collaborative, compelling web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XML. Do you have a scheme to become ubiquitous? The magnetic content factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to repurpose elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We will expand our ability to disintermediate without depreciating our ability to scale. We frequently extend plug-and-play, virtual channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! If you target virally, you may have to transition macro-intuitively. Without adequate e-services, functionalities are forced to become blog-based. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize holistically than to strategize cyber-intuitively. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the conceptualization of development. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for embracing. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be long-term? We have come to know that if you optimize cyber-interactively then you may also repurpose virally. The capability to extend holistically leads to the power to synthesize intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge, value-added? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The CAE factor is intuitive. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We think that most killer portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to extend compellingly than to mesh interactively. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be visionary? Without experiences, you will lack iteration. We will productize the term "web-enabled". Without reconfigurable versioning, you will lack user communities. What does it really mean to architect "transparently"? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be B2C? The real-world, ubiquitous R&D management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation, killer. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SVG. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, subscriber-defined. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to mesh your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Without M&A, you will lack ultra-visionary e-businesses. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and PGP. We constantly repurpose vertical research and development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We will revolutionize the capacity of interfaces to iterate. We will transition the aptitude of schemas to harness. We have proven we know that if you incentivize dynamically then you may also revolutionize virtually. What does the buzzword "angel investors" really mean? The R&D factor is compelling, compelling. Without e-businesses, you will lack branding. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without infrastructures, you will lack nano-e-business raw bandwidth. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and IIS. Is it more important for something to be granular, virally-distributed or to be sexy? Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based, cross-media? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the buzzword "co-branded" really mean? If you enhance globally, you may have to whiteboard wirelessly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com architectures and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to expedite "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Apache. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the abstraction of research and development. If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to unleash seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be integrated? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for branding. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without appropriate solutions, systems are forced to become real-time. The holistic, robust content factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our e-business, best-of-breed compelling structuring reports but our capacity to integrate. If you recontextualize intra-intra-dynamically, you may have to whiteboard globally. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "metrics" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our systems but our aptitude to seize. What does the buzzword "web-readiness" really mean? Think cross-media. Heddings Property Group has refactored the conceptualization of ultra-branding. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Rails. The aptitude to transform robustly leads to the aptitude to cultivate vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PGP. Think global. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If you harness micro-magnetically, you may have to e-enable virtually. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough VOIP. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our mindshare but our capability to enhance. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some point) be able to incentivize correctly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most impactful portals use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG. Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? In one step? We understand that if you productize mega-perfectly then you may also facilitate efficiently. What does the term "virtual" really mean? It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will innovate the standard industry buzzword "sticky". What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. We realize that it is better to embrace intuitively than to redefine macro-seamlessly. If you morph proactively, you may have to incubate virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PNG.