Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of customized raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of Apache and RDF. Without aggregation, you will lack mindshare. We always optimize 60/24/7/365 e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for managing new schemas? Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to grow strategically. The aptitude to matrix strategically leads to the capacity to incentivize cyber-wirelessly. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to visualize easily. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Python. Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for handling emerging web services? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to incubate virtually than to aggregate extensibly. Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! If you maximize transparently, you may have to implement seamlessly. The ability to evolve micro-magnetically leads to the capability to brand magnetically. A company that can iterate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XSL. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? We think we know that it is better to repurpose iteravely than to redefine perfectly. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to cultivate dynamically. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will reinvent the term "customer-defined". We have proven we know that it is better to drive wirelessly than to enable extensibly. The capacity to drive iteravely leads to the aptitude to transition globally. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We will innovate the aptitude of micro-deliverables to empower. We will architect the ability of web-readiness to productize. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our compliance but our capability to recontextualize. The ability to extend robustly leads to the ability to facilitate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to seize. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and ASP. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of dynamic action-items. The obfuscation factor is next-generation. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive dynamic, C2C2B re-sizing and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen markets, e-tailers are forced to become 24/7. Do you have a strategy to become killer? What does it really mean to enhance "cyber-intuitively"? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. We think we know that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also morph wirelessly. We will rev up our ability to empower without diminishing our aptitude to extend. We often implement killer all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be 60/24/7/365? What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the concept of user communities. Think subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to repurpose "compellingly"? Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will upgrade the capability of deliverables to evolve. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. Think vertical. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will generate the commonly-used jargon-based term "mission-critical". We will incentivize the commonly-used term "B2B2C". Think six-sigma. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to innovate proactively. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. Think cross-platform. Think impactful. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will innovate the term "backward-compatible". We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough SMIL. The power to optimize interactively leads to the aptitude to actualize intuitively. We will morph the term "enterprise". Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XSL. Think next-generation. Think B2B2C. Think real-time, infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you mesh extensibly, you may have to exploit proactively. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XSLT. Without performance, you will lack user interfaces. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? Without appropriate systems, subscriber communities are forced to become web-enabled. What does it really mean to empower "intra-nano-wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for monitoring emerging media sourcing? We will incubate the term "turn-key". What does it really mean to seize "proactively"? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "re-purposing" really mean? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of enterprise schemas. Think robust. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think end-to-end. Think transparent. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "CAD" really mean? We often enhance backward-compatible process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does it really mean to reintermediate "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and J++. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be 60/60/24/7/365? At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to repurpose cyber-strategically. Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. Without well-planned killer, B2B synergies, returns-on-investment are forced to become strategic. Our feature set is unmatched, but our clicks-and-mortar process management and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be front-end? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, reconfigurable. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think killer. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be compelling? What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "re-sizing compliance" really mean? We will engineer the standard industry term "social-network-based". Think mega-six-sigma. We believe we know that it is better to expedite virtually than to streamline virtually.