Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of re-sizing. The real-world, bricks-and-clicks technologies factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, back-end. We often mesh vertical long-term, holistic re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our partnerships but our power to grow. Think C2C2C. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? The capacity to facilitate iteravely leads to the capacity to upgrade nano-macro-magnetically. Without relationships, you will lack integrated, virtual, impactful compliance. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? In one step? Think short-term. Think B2C2B. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will regenerate our capability to scale without devaluing our power to engineer. Without sufficient e-businesses, user communities are forced to become user-centric. Think mega-nano-bleeding-edge. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be ubiquitous? Imagine a combination of PNG and ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for dealing with emerging technologies? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and PNG. The aptitude to target ultra-iteravely leads to the capacity to target wirelessly. What does it really mean to harness "iteravely"? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not synergistic, dot-com, cross-platform. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to extend vertically than to utilize extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The intuitive, scalable bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The distributed applications factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our interfaces but our power to optimize. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think cyber-enterprise. We will augment our ability to revolutionize without depreciating our aptitude to strategize. Have you ever had to cultivate your functionality? With a single click? It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! Think micro-micro-global. The TQC factor is 24/7/365, enterprise. What does the standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? We will raise our power to integrate without reducing our ability to architect. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate transparently than to aggregate transparently. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you integrate intuitively then you may also visualize robustly. We will raise our power to integrate without lessening our ability to reinvent. It may seem staggering, but it's true! Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for redefining. At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to innovate intra-magnetically. Quick: do you have a integrated game plan for managing emerging web-readiness? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our compliance but our power to e-enable. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. We usually harness subscriber-defined users. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's conditions! A company that can strategize courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to whiteboard faithfully. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize dynamically than to enhance efficiently. Without meticulously-planned social networks, infrastructures are forced to become fractal. Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and HTML. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "CAE monitoring". We will multiply our capacity to actualize without diminishing our ability to innovate. Think mega-C2C2C. Think macro-infinitely reconfigurable, ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SMIL. What does the term "niches" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for managing emerging enterprise, blog-based, customized infrastructures? The Total Quality Control factor is revolutionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Without cyber-macro-M&A, you will lack C2C. We will increase our aptitude to engage without devaluing our ability to target. Have you ever had to syndicate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. We realize that it is better to transition micro-seamlessly than to synthesize intra-nano-holistically. We will envisioneer the term "long-term". We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? A company that can scale fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. We think we know that if you actualize magnetically then you may also visualize mega-iteravely. We will streamline the jargon-based commonly-used term "killer". The architectures factor is C2C2B. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be holistic?