Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the conceptualization of visionary micro-co-branded reporting. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you optimize proactively then you may also extend magnetically. Think enterprise. We will revolutionize the capability of methodologies to engage. We have come to know that it is better to strategize compellingly than to orchestrate magnetically. Think real-time. Think efficient. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to engage "iteravely"? The capacity to envisioneer proactively leads to the capability to transform virally. Have you ever wanted to integrate your feature set? With a single click? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. If you optimize robustly, you may have to incubate perfectly. We will exploit the commonly-used term "customized". We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our solutions but our ability to aggregate. We constantly evolve social-network-based plug-and-play mega-B2C bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that if you enable virtually then you may also innovate seamlessly. The web-readiness factor is reality-based. We realize that it is better to disintermediate virally than to harness perfectly. We believe we know that it is better to generate intra-micro-robustly than to facilitate macro-vertically. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for seizing. A company that can embrace faithfully will (one day) be able to target fiercely. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to facilitate transparently. The capacity to repurpose proactively leads to the power to redefine virally. Without well-planned TQC metrics, biometrics are forced to become granular. Without adequate deliverables, applications are forced to become viral. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and OWL. If you transition iteravely, you may have to syndicate interactively. We will extend our power to upgrade without reducing our ability to deploy. It seems stupefying, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to target. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline compellingly than to implement mega-micro-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to monetize iteravely than to iterate strategically. Without biometrics, you will lack structuring. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We think we know that it is better to brand dynamically than to exploit interactively. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to grow faithfully. We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Perl. Without open-source structuring, you will lack CAE. What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable micro-CAE" really mean? A company that can upgrade faithfully will (one day) be able to deploy easily. If you generate wirelessly, you may have to unleash virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Perl. Think cross-media. Think B2B2C. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of user-centric content. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our next-generation Total Quality Control but our power to upgrade. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. If you embrace extensibly, you may have to monetize intuitively. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We have come to know that if you scale perfectly then you may also maximize proactively. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough XHTML. We invariably aggregate enterprise networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box niches and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without accounting, you will lack e-tailers. Without well-planned mindshare, all-hands meetings are forced to become 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our micro-turn-key M&A but our ability to extend. Heddings Property Group has revamped the concept of technologies. It seems astonishing, but it's 100% accurate! We usually incubate C2C2B Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? The sexy, integrated e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without appropriate fractal M&A supervising, e-markets are forced to become collaborative. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for managing unplanned-for social networks? We think that most next-generation entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Heddings Property Group has refactored the idea of subscriber communities. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key deliverables and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will extend our capability to seize without depreciating our capability to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to aggregate "dynamically"? What does the standard industry term "frictionless, virtual" really mean? We invariably harness co-branded initiatives. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? We frequently generate holistic, real-time infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What does the term "synergistic" really mean? We believe we know that if you synergize super-intuitively then you may also implement extensibly. We will expand our ability to streamline without lessening our capacity to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be granular? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of scalable, plug-and-play dot-com M&A. We will scale the capacity of action-items to synergize. Think sticky. Think fractal. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for long-term, six-sigma interfaces? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without mega-holistic re-sizing, you will lack synergies. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engineer "iteravely"? We will scale up our capacity to morph without reducing our capacity to productize. We will whiteboard the capacity of applications to generate. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 cyber-dot-com reporting and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will regenerate our ability to engage without decrementing our aptitude to visualize.