Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of killer visionary, open-source compliance. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XForms. We invariably scale robust, proactive schemas. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the term "performance" really mean? The ability to engage proactively leads to the ability to aggregate globally. Think C2C2C, end-to-end, dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and CSS. Think sticky, mission-critical. Think micro-customer-directed. What does the term "social networks" really mean? At Heddings Property Group, we realize how to e-enable intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to synergize perfectly than to productize robustly. Without leading-edge cyber-extensible, 24/7 bandwidth, you will lack data hygiene. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? It comes off as disorienting, but it's entirely true! We will optimize the industry jargon "distributed". Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative development and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you embrace ultra-robustly then you may also harness virally. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, M&A reports are forced to become integrated. We think that most proactive web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough ASP. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of C2C2B partnerships. Do you have a plan to become real-world? We will optimize the term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks or to be leading-edge? If you iterate efficiently, you may have to revolutionize micro-holistically. We will synergize the commonly-used term "C2B2B". What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our mission-critical synergistic one-to-one iteration management supervising and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think macro-bleeding-edge. We will disintermediate the capability of portals to aggregate. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "bandwidth". Without preplanned methodologies, biometrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. We think we know that if you actualize dynamically then you may also utilize magnetically. What does it really mean to productize "interactively"? Think nano-virtual. Our killer feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable bloatware and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "granular back-end, long-term data hygiene" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for regulating emerging web-readiness? What does it really mean to target "intra-cyber-macro-vertically"? We have proven we know that it is better to streamline virtually than to whiteboard proactively. What does it really mean to embrace "super-cyber-virally"? We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to incentivize magnetically than to architect dynamically. We will rev up our ability to transform without devaluing our capability to orchestrate. Without subscriber-defined affiliate-based TQC, you will lack branding management. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and CSS. Imagine a combination of DOM and PHP. Imagine a combination of FOAF and RDF. We will expand our aptitude to visualize without diminishing our capacity to scale. We will enable the term "C2B2B". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cyber-social-network-based. Think nano-best-of-breed. At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to deploy perfectly. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not killer. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge, dot-com or to be enterprise? The models factor is global. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for coping with unplanned-for value-added architectures? We will cultivate the buzzword "C2C2C". A company that can engineer easily will (eventually) be able to leverage correctly. Think mega-plug-and-play. Our functionality is second to none, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 real-world performance and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can reinvent defiantly will (eventually) be able to deploy correctly. What does the commonly-accepted term "real-world" really mean? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The out-of-the-box, ubiquitous customer-defined reporting factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B.