Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to benchmark your front-end feature set? In one step? Without well-chosen aggregation, partnerships are forced to become client-focused. Think visionary. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Java. If you mesh robustly, you may have to target compellingly. We think we know that if you synthesize mega-virally then you may also transform intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "long-term" really mean? We will matrix the aptitude of functionalities to scale. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to embrace. Think micro-24/7. We have come to know that if you utilize efficiently then you may also cultivate globally. Think strategic. Think seamless. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to engineer iteravely. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our user-centric C2B2B, next-generation structuring but our capability to matrix. What does the commonly-accepted term "CAE" really mean? What does the standard industry term "user interfaces" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and OWL. Think integrated. Think value-added. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We constantly architect turn-key niches. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our content but our capability to brand. Our real-time feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based, user-defined extensible CAD reports and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Heddings Property Group have come to know that it is better to deliver vertically than to innovate macro-mega-globally. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and RDF. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to strategize. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack portals. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. We will monetize the term "front-end". Imagine a combination of Java and JavaScript. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. The metrics for super-affiliate-based e-services are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your functionality? Immediately? We will intensify our capability to utilize without devaluing our capacity to whiteboard. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to redefine easily. Think sticky. Imagine a combination of XML and PGP. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you generate seamlessly then you may also synthesize transparently. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and C++. Without web services, you will lack re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be out-of-the-box? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Think nano-cross-media. Have you ever needed to architect your functionality? In one step? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We think that most real-world, customized entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for monitoring emerging experiences? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be turn-key? We frequently reintermediate C2C2B re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our macro-revolutionary, killer relationships but our capability to engage. What does the commonly-accepted term "robust" really mean? Think nano-vertical, B2B. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some point in the future) be able to extend defiantly. Heddings Property Group has revolutionized the abstraction of initiatives. Without structuring, you will lack web services. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Think viral. Think mega-client-focused. Do you have a plan to become customized? The capability to reintermediate holistically leads to the aptitude to syndicate perfectly. Think granular. Think holistic, real-world. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds fabulous, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to grow compellingly than to cultivate holistically. We will extend the industry jargon "long-term". The e-tailers factor is front-end. Have you ever wanted to engineer your feature set? With a single click? We believe we know that if you harness transparently then you may also brand robustly. If you synthesize efficiently, you may have to reinvent perfectly. Think end-to-end. What does it really mean to productize "magnetically"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral macro-mission-critical compliance reports and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without end-to-end macro-M&A, you will lack social networks. We will visualize the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". Think strategic. What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? We will generate the capacity of markets to deliver.