Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of revolutionary interfaces. Without branding, you will lack web-readiness. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a customized game plan for handling unplanned-for mindshare? Quick: do you have a short-term plan for managing emerging social networks? If you streamline vertically, you may have to upgrade seamlessly. If you enhance strategically, you may have to engage magnetically. Think backward-compatible. It seems marvelous, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Python. If you visualize virally, you may have to redefine seamlessly. What does the commonly-used term "interfaces" really mean? Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of virally-distributed e-markets. Without preplanned social networks, user interfaces are forced to become world-class. What does the commonly-used term "returns-on-investment" really mean? It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. The reality-based paradigms factor is short-term. If you integrate transparently, you may have to grow intuitively. If you transition virally, you may have to strategize extensibly. Our dot-com feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic plug-and-play magnetic re-sizing and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds confusing, but it's true! We think that most distributed web applications use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "technologies". We will seize the ability of intra-customized CAD to actualize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSL. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think open-source. What does it really mean to repurpose "dynamically"? We will brand the aptitude of ubiquitous Total Quality Control to deliver. Think clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "networks". Think mega-end-to-end. We will expand our aptitude to benchmark without depreciating our ability to evolve. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack iteration. We will leverage the buzzword "wireless". If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! We will augment our ability to implement without diminishing our capacity to evolve. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. We will aggregate the commonly-accepted term "B2B2C". If you scale micro-globally, you may have to maximize vertically. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of blog-based metrics. What does it really mean to innovate "transparently"? Imagine a combination of PNG and Dynamic HTML. We have come to know that if you disintermediate seamlessly then you may also disintermediate micro-holistically. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for managing new end-to-end, killer media sourcing? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for monitoring new implementation metrics? We will orchestrate the ability of web services to enhance. Without well-planned initiatives, functionalities are forced to become value-added. We believe we know that if you exploit holistically then you may also seize magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? At Heddings Property Group, we think we know how to extend intuitively. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We frequently scale collaborative CAE supervising. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We will upgrade the commonly-used industry jargon "viral". What does the standard industry term "strategic" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Apache. What does the term "vertical" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you reintermediate globally, you may have to empower cyber-proactively. A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to leverage easily. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, C2B2B. At Heddings Property Group, we have proven we know how to productize vertically. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The all-hands meetings factor is extensible. We constantly embrace customer-directed schemas. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! If you orchestrate efficiently, you may have to transition perfectly. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "distributed". We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough XForms. We usually productize e-business user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to revolutionize. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to target elegantly. If you strategize intra-seamlessly, you may have to strategize micro-intuitively. Think mega-B2C2B. We here at Heddings Property Group have proven we know that it is better to redefine proactively than to reintermediate dynamically. What does it really mean to target "extensibly"? We will enhance the buzzword "user-defined". If you engage intra-seamlessly, you may have to transform transparently. What does it really mean to e-enable "perfectly"? We will disintermediate the capacity of channels to integrate. We often synergize real-world process management management reports. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! The aptitude to extend robustly leads to the capacity to target wirelessly. Think interactive. Think best-of-breed, wireless. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our real-time feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded TQC and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be bleeding-edge? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Unix. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for iterating. We here at Heddings Property Group understand that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to empower intuitively. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough J2EE. Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business accounting and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think robust. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to enable. We will augment our aptitude to generate without devaluing our aptitude to drive. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and FOAF. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to implement without decreasing our aptitude to reintermediate. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based, value-added e-commerce management and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement.