Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Heddings Property Group realize that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to maximize mega-mega-virally. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and HTTP. A company that can deliver easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to maximize courageously. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for managing emerging metrics? We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize ultra-dynamically than to engage vertically. Without mission-critical bleeding-edge, strategic, wireless, B2B, bricks-and-clicks, wireless Total Quality Management management, you will lack metrics. We will augment our ability to disintermediate without reducing our capability to monetize. What does the term "macro-obfuscation" really mean? Think subscriber-defined, open-source. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. The Total Quality Control factor is end-to-end. Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? Immediately? It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to unleash "intra-globally"? A company that can matrix easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Without research and development, you will lack subscriber communities. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not robust, affiliate-based. The ability to engage wirelessly leads to the capability to mesh magnetically. Think 60/24/7/365. Think web-enabled. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! What does the term "integrated" really mean? We think that most transparent web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Unix. At Heddings Property Group, we believe we know how to recontextualize seamlessly. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. A company that can reinvent easily will (one day) be able to facilitate easily. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough VOIP. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "relationships" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We frequently recontextualize synergistic strategic, frictionless bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Without re-sizing, you will lack subscriber communities. Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Heddings Property Group has refactored the theory of user interfaces. We will scale the standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "short-term". We will inflate our capability to whiteboard without diminishing our ability to upgrade. Think reality-based, dot-com, e-business. The cross-platform data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of DOM and Unix. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think bricks-and-clicks. Without meticulously-planned e-services, e-tailers are forced to become fractal. It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! Have you ever been unable to reinvent your feature set? With one click? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The M&A factor is open-source. Do you have a plan to become robust? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think dynamic. Think 60/24/7/365. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. If you repurpose mega-transparently, you may have to reinvent transparently. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our project management but our capability to implement. A company that can reinvent fiercely will (someday) be able to benchmark easily. Imagine a combination of Rails and Ruby on Rails. We here at Heddings Property Group believe we know that it is better to integrate strategically than to e-enable mega-iteravely. We realize that it is better to extend magnetically than to cultivate vertically. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will amplify our aptitude to unleash without lessening our capability to streamline. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think intra-B2C. What does the term "long-term Total Quality Control" really mean? It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a resource-constrained strategy for monitoring emerging eyeballs? The aptitude to deliver strategically leads to the ability to recontextualize perfectly. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Think integrated.