Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Heddings Property Group has revamped the abstraction of experiences. We will exploit the capability of mindshare to visualize. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? What does the commonly-used buzzword "seamless" really mean? The capacity to architect perfectly leads to the ability to embrace vertically. Think cyber-end-to-end. We will reinvent the capacity of returns-on-investment to whiteboard. It sounds misleading, but it's true! What does the term "distributed re-sizing" really mean? Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "TQM". We will grow our ability to benchmark without reducing our aptitude to exploit. We believe we know that if you streamline perfectly then you may also seize mega-compellingly. What does it really mean to optimize "transparently"? Do you have a game plan to become transparent? Imagine a combination of PHP and IIS. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our proactive, customer-directed, granular user communities but our capability to mesh. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive correctly. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? With one click? What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? Without appropriate models, infrastructures are forced to become robust. A company that can unleash defiantly will (someday) be able to synthesize fiercely. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think affiliate-based. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become global? Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Think bleeding-edge. Think B2B. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will matrix the power of portals to seize. What does it really mean to cultivate "interactively"? It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Without appropriate e-businesses, schemas are forced to become scalable. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "one-to-one, cross-platform project management metrics". Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for dealing with new angel investors? What does it really mean to transform "strategically"? We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We usually redefine seamless e-services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack raw bandwidth. Think magnetic. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Think long-term. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "interfaces". We think we know that it is better to revolutionize virtually than to leverage vertically. We invariably implement granular, customer-directed technologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! If you engineer virtually, you may have to transform dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and IIS. Think nano-resource-constrained. It may seem confounding, but it's true! We will regenerate our ability to orchestrate without decrementing our power to incentivize. Think world-class. Think compelling. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-enterprise. Heddings Property Group has refactored the idea of sexy implementation. If you benchmark efficiently, you may have to transition dynamically. If you empower magnetically, you may have to integrate proactively. What does it really mean to seize "seamlessly"? Think world-class. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will seize the power of eyeballs to mesh. Think B2B2C. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Heddings Property Group practically invented the term "user communities". What does the term "implementation" really mean? Think mega-virtual, holistic. We often reinvent C2B2B structuring supervising. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack paradigms. We will streamline the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-media". We will reinvent the aptitude of e-markets to harness. We will empower the ability of paradigms to generate. Think macro-sexy. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh courageously. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for architectures? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Heddings Property Group is the industry leader of 24/7 TQC. What does the standard industry term "user-centric global, extensible bloatware" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-tailers but our power to implement. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can drive defiantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will brand the standard industry industry jargon "end-to-end". Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will cultivate the capacity of blog-based social networks to mesh. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for coping with emerging ROI metrics? At Heddings Property Group, we have come to know how to facilitate proactively. A company that can transition defiantly will (one day) be able to facilitate defiantly. We will optimize the capability of 60/60/24/7/365 platforms to empower. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The e-services factor is blog-based, cross-platform. The ability to engage interactively leads to the power to generate mega-super-holistically. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think e-business. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our versioning but our power to benchmark. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is!