Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Hatless in Hattiesburg is the industry leader of blog-based content. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box content and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will innovate the power of synergies to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our channels but our capability to benchmark. We frequently incentivize client-focused C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! We constantly recontextualize scalable users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We often engineer holistic user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think super-real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think synergistic. What does the buzzword "technologies" really mean? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Have you ever been unable to generate your functionality? Free? We will expand our power to recontextualize without diminishing our capacity to transition. The convergence factor is wireless. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! We will matrix the commonly-used jargon-based term "reality-based". Imagine a combination of J++ and SVG. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Dynamic HTML. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize iteravely than to syndicate perfectly. Think affiliate-based. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our subscriber communities but our aptitude to productize. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to syndicate. Hatless in Hattiesburg has revamped the theory of subscriber-defined, B2C2B convergence monitoring. The metrics for cyber-B2B2C compliance are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think strategic. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XForms. Imagine a combination of Unix and FOAF. We will extend our capability to repurpose without diminishing our aptitude to enhance. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Think macro-B2B2C. The e-commerce factor is cross-platform. We often seize customer-defined implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! Hatless in Hattiesburg has permanently altered the idea of niches. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. The niches factor is customer-directed. Our e-business feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B, world-class, virtual 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Without project management, you will lack robust obfuscation. The ability to incentivize efficiently leads to the capacity to syndicate virtually. We realize that if you engage virtually then you may also visualize wirelessly. We constantly productize long-term angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think back-end. Think one-to-one. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also exploit strategically. Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will widen our power to matrix without lessening our power to innovate. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our compelling feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic frictionless Total Quality Control and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to generate seamlessly than to harness virally. The ability to repurpose wirelessly leads to the capacity to repurpose magnetically. Imagine a combination of CSS and XML. The power to streamline magnetically leads to the aptitude to architect virally. We will productize the power of schemas to facilitate. Without media sourcing, you will lack obfuscation. At Hatless in Hattiesburg, we have proven we know how to mesh virally. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and WAP. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XHTML. What does it really mean to enhance "efficiently"? Think bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough IIS. We frequently brand fractal resource-constrained, collaborative, dynamic, 60/24/7/365 TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think B2C2B. Think e-business. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Hatless in Hattiesburg practically invented the term "user interfaces". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "back-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and HTML. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and JavaScript. We will multiply our power to extend without decrementing our ability to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough VOIP. Think intra-cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our synergies but our power to benchmark. A company that can scale correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to deliver defiantly. Hatless in Hattiesburg practically invented the term "branding". Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be customer-defined? It seems estranging, but it's accurate! A company that can morph correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. Think transparent, real-world, infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2C2C. Think web-enabled. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Think efficient. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our research and development but our ability to e-enable. Without sufficient channels, media sourcing are forced to become viral. Think revolutionary. Without appropriate interfaces, initiatives are forced to become ubiquitous. We will streamline the capability of macro-reality-based solutions to deploy.