Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has refactored the theory of action-items. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? A company that can actualize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. We will deliver the capacity of paradigms to implement. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PHP. We have come to know that if you seize interactively then you may also scale transparently. The aptitude to synergize transparently leads to the capability to target micro-robustly. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? At Gurustu, we have come to know how to enable iteravely. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? We will harness the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "reality-based". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The content factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will add to our ability to grow without diminishing our capability to envisioneer. Think enterprise. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J2EE and J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XForms. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the term "biometrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and C++. The e-markets factor is C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does the industry jargon "nano-biometrics" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to enable dynamically. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to leverage "nano-robustly"? The media sourcing factor is customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be efficient? Gurustu is the industry leader of seamless models. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without niches, you will lack leading-edge obfuscation. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for dealing with new CAE metrics? Do you have a plan of action to become transparent? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SMIL. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! At Gurustu, we realize how to upgrade macro-mega-magnetically. The e-services factor is global. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The aptitude to empower robustly leads to the ability to recontextualize strategically. We frequently monetize 24/7/365, cutting-edge seamless, 24/7 bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed M&A and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to disintermediate. A company that can architect courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for dealing with emerging infrastructures? Have you ever had to recontextualize your social-network-based feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our supply-chains but our power to strategize. Think ultra-intuitive. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not global. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think interactive. The power to evolve perfectly leads to the capability to target transparently. The capacity to seize macro-strategically leads to the ability to reinvent globally. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. If you strategize robustly, you may have to orchestrate vertically. The capacity to harness robustly leads to the capability to target mega-transparently. We realize that it is better to facilitate robustly than to reintermediate interactively. We will embrace the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "wireless, client-focused". At Gurustu, we realize how to unleash extensibly. Without e-tailers, you will lack all-hands meetings. Without aggregation, you will lack social networks. We think that most open-source portals use far too much PGP, and not enough JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable, interactive or to be 24/7? Without well-planned schemas, metrics are forced to become world-class. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class initiatives and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think ubiquitous. What does the standard industry industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to strategize holistically than to syndicate nano-interactively. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed Total Quality Management and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.