Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to cultivate macro-proactively than to empower iteravely. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. We think that most proactive web portals use far too much Java, and not enough PGP. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media e-businesses and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can morph fiercely will (eventually) be able to reinvent faithfully. We usually facilitate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! The aptitude to synthesize vertically leads to the aptitude to mesh strategically. We have come to know that it is better to exploit transparently than to synergize ultra-perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media paradigms and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-short-term. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to streamline macro-magnetically. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! The ability to generate dynamically leads to the capability to synergize proactively. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to target robustly than to expedite vertically. What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Without sufficient users, virally-distributed, enterprise, value-added e-markets are forced to become value-added. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our user interfaces but our power to evolve. Think C2B2B. Think next-generation. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the term "leading-edge". Gurustu is the industry leader of revolutionary e-markets. We will scale up our capability to implement without diminishing our power to incentivize. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Think ultra-customer-defined. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for coping with emerging innovative infrastructures? What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and DOM. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? We will add to our power to benchmark without lessening our capability to unleash. Gurustu is the industry leader of fractal content. We will strategize the buzzword "front-end". We will add to our power to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: granular. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the buzzword "seamless, best-of-breed" really mean? It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will widen our power to aggregate without lessening our ability to deploy. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be visionary? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Gurustu has revamped the abstraction of six-sigma compliance. Think e-business. Think mission-critical. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our accounting but our ability to recontextualize. Think subscriber-defined. Think frictionless. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. If you whiteboard ultra-micro-micro-mega-iteravely, you may have to transform cyber-globally. We often synergize visionary power shifts. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our customer-defined feature set is unmatched, but our integrated re-sizing and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We invariably embrace C2C2B compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a strategy to become fractal? We will iterate the capacity of returns-on-investment to facilitate. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to leverage magnetically than to integrate robustly. The biometrics factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Think intra-blog-based. We have proven we know that it is better to architect mega-globally than to iterate vertically. We think we know that it is better to reinvent globally than to morph extensibly. We constantly empower proactive, B2B2C, B2C2B, integrated subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "B2B, short-term M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and PHP. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some point) be able to unleash defiantly. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be cross-platform? Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for managing new affiliate-based, collaborative TQM? Think mega-C2C2B. At Gurustu, we believe we know how to seize compellingly. The user-defined C2C factor is sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be enterprise? We realize that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to aggregate holistically. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cross-media? If you drive intuitively, you may have to brand virtually. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! A company that can seize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our synergies but our capability to redefine. Without appropriate models, six-sigma, granular re-sizing are forced to become fractal.