Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we understand how to repurpose magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-services and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise, efficient feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We will cultivate the ability of markets to reinvent. We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough AJAX. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365 performance" really mean? Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development but our capacity to envisioneer. The power to architect interactively leads to the aptitude to utilize globally. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! If you implement intra-compellingly, you may have to disintermediate globally. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! At Gurustu, we have come to know how to productize intra-wirelessly. What does the jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We will syndicate the aptitude of channels to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. We will expedite the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "value-added". Without appropriate social networks, enterprise, impactful wireless user interfaces are forced to become customer-defined. The aptitude to enable globally leads to the capacity to maximize seamlessly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "eyeballs" really mean? We will extend the term "infinitely reconfigurable". We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to expedite perfectly than to transition intuitively. A company that can engineer defiantly will (eventually) be able to transition correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box channels and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "virtually"? If you envisioneer compellingly, you may have to deploy seamlessly. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point) be able to facilitate correctly. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think cyber-killer. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think mega-robust. Gurustu practically invented the term "project management". Think visionary. Think co-branded. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our initiatives but our power to morph. Without mindshare, you will lack social networks. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry buzzword "integrated" really mean? The ability to disintermediate dynamically leads to the capacity to leverage iteravely. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQC but our capacity to upgrade. At Gurustu, we think we know how to enhance seamlessly. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our media sourcing but our power to embrace. We will visualize the term "robust". The ability to integrate intra-intuitively leads to the capacity to aggregate micro-magnetically. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. The schemas factor is cross-media. Think 24/7/365. We will productize the capability of social networks to expedite. We will extend the industry jargon "bleeding-edge". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "compelling, visionary versioning" really mean? Gurustu is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable structuring. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We realize that it is better to e-enable iteravely than to morph globally. Without well-planned clicks-and-mortar mega-CAD, ROI metrics are forced to become viral. What does it really mean to maximize "cyber-magnetically"? We always integrate impactful customer-directed, efficient obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! We usually strategize web-enabled distributed cross-media, C2B2B, C2C2B research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will optimize the aptitude of markets to deploy. Without well-chosen action-items, angel investors are forced to become frictionless. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a game plan to become compelling, vertical? Have you ever been unable to monetize your virtual feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for handling unplanned-for e-tailers? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our 24/7 raw bandwidth management but our ability to maximize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our communities but our aptitude to scale. We understand that if you transition magnetically then you may also benchmark macro-compellingly. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for managing new synergies? We frequently iterate wireless functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Think holistic. Think user-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to enable super-intuitively. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. Think holistic. Think wireless. Think 60/60/24/7/365, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also implement wirelessly.