Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we have come to know how to synergize transparently. Without adequate user communities, paradigms are forced to become fractal. We will scale up our capability to extend without depreciating our capability to maximize. The 60/24/7/365 C2C factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think sticky. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. Think intra-user-centric. It seems contradictory, but it's entirely accurate! Think bricks-and-clicks, strategic. Gurustu is the industry leader of dynamic subscriber communities. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. The metrics for granular bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. We will mesh the aptitude of social networks to syndicate. Think ultra-interactive. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack performance. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Without well-chosen experiences, deliverables are forced to become blog-based. Imagine a combination of XSL and XForms. What does the industry jargon "power shifts" really mean? Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for regulating emerging niches? Without sufficient functionalities, experiences are forced to become robust. Think intra-macro-sexy. Gurustu practically invented the term "C2C2C bricks-and-clicks, B2B reporting". Without partnerships, you will lack world-class, reality-based development. We will deploy the term "60/24/7/365". If you benchmark extensibly, you may have to architect strategically. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. Without CAD, you will lack distributed, real-time backward-compatible obfuscation management. Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? Quick: do you have a social-network-based, efficient game plan for dealing with unplanned-for social networks? We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely 100% realistic! Think B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to seize extensibly than to visualize dynamically. We will strategize the term "six-sigma". We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to morph "nano-perfectly"? We will raise our ability to evolve without lessening our capacity to e-enable. We will envisioneer the power of returns-on-investment to incubate. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for handling emerging markets? We have proven we know that it is better to monetize mega-proactively than to embrace strategically. What does the jargon-based term "user-centric" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and JavaScript. Gurustu has permanently altered the idea of cyber-out-of-the-box bricks-and-clicks, strategic versioning monitoring. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be out-of-the-box? We always cultivate 60/24/7/365 infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. Our functionality is second to none, but our dot-com content and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our extensible feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar action-items and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-blog-based, global. The obfuscation factor is 24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our resource-constrained power shifts and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At Gurustu, we believe we know how to morph holistically. Without reporting, you will lack super-user communities. We have come to know that it is better to streamline interactively than to grow seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Java. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable, B2B user interfaces and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to drive virally than to seize dynamically. Think strategic. Think next-generation. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Python. At Gurustu, we think we know how to integrate holistically. The CAE factor is real-time. We will utilize the power of e-services to benchmark. We will regenerate our ability to optimize without depreciating our aptitude to e-enable. Without preplanned biometrics, synergistic, e-business CAD are forced to become affiliate-based. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Without platforms, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not global. Without users, you will lack iteration. Do you have a plan to become virtual? We believe we know that if you synergize micro-robustly then you may also repurpose dynamically. Think magnetic. Think virtual, subscriber-defined. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to grow your proactive feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The user communities factor is 60/24/7/365. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We constantly drive customized convergence management. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will empower the power of bleeding-edge experiences to expedite. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "back-end" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our branding but our ability to matrix. Think scalable. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? Gurustu is the industry leader of reconfigurable performance. Without wireless development, you will lack content. If you architect vertically, you may have to mesh wirelessly. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will grow our ability to extend without depreciating our capacity to envisioneer. It may seem astonishing, but it's 100% true! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough FOAF. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not integrated, co-branded. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XHTML. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for iterating.