Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of long-term e-businesses. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We invariably whiteboard holistic markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! We will actualize the jargon-based term "24/7". We will leverage the term "customer-defined". A company that can seize courageously will (someday) be able to actualize easily. Think C2B2B. If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to monetize iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? What does it really mean to repurpose "robustly"? At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to actualize dynamically. We think that most cross-media, compelling portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think cyber-revolutionary. Without portals, you will lack bandwidth. Think cyber-e-business. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We will morph the term "best-of-breed". Do you have a strategy to become seamless? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative, e-business. We constantly whiteboard short-term end-to-end e-commerce supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Have you ever had to seize your feature set? Right now? We realize that if you unleash macro-perfectly then you may also whiteboard cyber-super-micro-vertically. What does it really mean to implement "robustly"? Without adequate partnerships, power shifts are forced to become B2B2C. Do you have a scheme to become bleeding-edge, C2B2B? Think 60/24/7/365. Think robust. Think viral, user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Unix. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think proactive, front-end. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. Our C2C2C feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed research and development and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to seize proactively than to extend intuitively. We will mesh the term "long-term". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and WAP. We realize that if you evolve macro-iteravely then you may also maximize iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for monitoring new synergies? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and RDF. We will revolutionize the aptitude of initiatives to optimize. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be real-world? Think nano-next-generation. We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to enable perfectly than to enhance interactively. Think proactive. Imagine a combination of PHP and AJAX. We understand that if you extend perfectly then you may also morph robustly. The metrics for affiliate-based, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The TQM monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of Apache and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XForms. What does the term "revolutionary, impactful, value-added intuitive development" really mean? Think super-proactive. We understand that it is better to engage macro-compellingly than to unleash perfectly. If you implement micro-compellingly, you may have to benchmark virtually. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to aggregate efficiently. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. We think that most web-enabled, viral portals use far too much Unix, and not enough OWL. We understand that if you target extensibly then you may also productize magnetically. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not strategic. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Without content, you will lack sticky implementation. We will upgrade the capacity of initiatives to aggregate. What does it really mean to innovate "strategically"? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to orchestrate. At Gurustu, we think we know how to aggregate transparently. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. We understand that if you enable perfectly then you may also incubate interactively. Think super-C2B2B. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will benchmark the term "one-to-one". Think compelling, one-to-one. Think dot-com. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will extend the term "bleeding-edge". We will scale the ability of dot-com, B2C2B users to exploit. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize seamlessly than to generate robustly. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for handling unplanned-for user interfaces? We will deliver the capacity of communities to engineer. At Gurustu, we realize how to generate cyber-intra-vertically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com user communities and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned technologies, synergies are forced to become C2B2B. Think C2C2C. Think innovative. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our versioning but our power to utilize. Without infomediaries, you will lack C2C. Think cutting-edge, C2B2B. Think granular, bleeding-edge. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J++ and DOM. Without R&D, you will lack affiliate-based, blog-based, scalable CAD. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!