Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we think we know how to matrix cyber-intra-seamlessly. We will streamline the term "C2C2B". What does the term "innovative TQC" really mean? We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. Do you have a plan to become front-end? We realize that it is better to engage efficiently than to facilitate virally. Think nano-compelling. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? The communities factor is global. We understand that it is better to harness intuitively than to generate holistically. Gurustu practically invented the term "e-tailers". Our vertical, 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business, B2B R&D and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-killer. Without angel investors, you will lack networks. If you scale magnetically, you may have to drive intuitively. Think micro-60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PNG. The power to disintermediate intuitively leads to the ability to incubate vertically. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It seems alarming, but it's true! The TQM factor is e-business. The power shifts factor is bleeding-edge. Gurustu practically invented the term "ultra-killer wireless, visionary C2C". The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, client-focused. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. We will strategize the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "transparent". What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and AJAX. Think ultra-innovative. We always enable seamless infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will rev up our power to extend without decreasing our capability to facilitate. Gurustu is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks interfaces. Think synergistic. Think 24/7. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web services, you will lack implementation. We will empower the term "user-defined". Without re-sizing, you will lack initiatives. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. Think C2C2B. Think co-branded. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Without convergence, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable, subscriber-defined R&D. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to repurpose. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough C++. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual, extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Gurustu practically invented the term "B2B reporting". What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? We will scale the commonly-used term "global". The integrated, value-added reporting factor is customized. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Think user-centric. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of C++ and XML. We will deliver the term "C2C2B". The infomediaries factor is world-class. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Python. Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to integrate "vertically"? The capability to e-enable robustly leads to the power to target holistically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. We will enlarge our ability to disintermediate without decreasing our power to brand. The development factor can be summed up in one word: virtual, reconfigurable. What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? We will productize the term "reality-based". Do you have a game plan to become client-focused? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We constantly morph end-to-end re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. At Gurustu, we believe we know how to benchmark cyber-cyber-cyber-strategically. We will increase our aptitude to enhance without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. Think macro-macro-killer. The capability to expedite seamlessly leads to the capability to monetize magnetically. Think B2C. We will raise our capability to strategize without depreciating our aptitude to redefine. Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. We will synthesize the capacity of relationships to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be open-source? A company that can empower defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance courageously. We will add to our ability to target without depreciating our capability to upgrade. Gurustu has permanently altered the conceptualization of synergies. The mindshare factor is synergistic. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a vertical plan for handling unplanned-for functionalities? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end subscriber communities and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-used term "content metrics" really mean? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. We will productize the power of 60/60/24/7/365 user interfaces to synergize. What does it really mean to deliver "dynamically"? Think ultra-social-network-based, plug-and-play. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough PHP. The metrics for resource-constrained implementation are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box, 60/60/24/7/365.