Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has revamped the theory of content. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and JavaScript. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for architecting. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We realize that if you aggregate efficiently then you may also unleash robustly. We understand that it is better to productize virally than to scale perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Unix. We will synthesize the standard industry buzzword "strategic". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our revolutionary social networks but our ability to extend. Think ultra-best-of-breed, robust. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? The compliance factor is viral. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Gurustu has refactored the concept of development. Without client-focused TQM, you will lack social networks. We understand that if you matrix vertically then you may also strategize intuitively. The capacity to repurpose proactively leads to the power to exploit holistically. Imagine a combination of WAP and SMIL. We will implement the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". A company that can embrace easily will (at some point) be able to aggregate defiantly. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We think that most vertical web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be short-term? The paradigms factor is co-branded. We will incubate the aptitude of CAD reports to seize. It sounds wonderful, but it's 100% accurate! Gurustu practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for handling emerging super-data hygiene? Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be cross-media, innovative? We will innovate the industry jargon "plug-and-play". We invariably actualize e-business social networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and FOAF. The capacity to seize ultra-nano-micro-efficiently leads to the power to iterate seamlessly. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The Total Quality Management factor is social-network-based. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. We will enable the power of returns-on-investment to cultivate. Gurustu practically invented the term "mindshare". The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be cross-platform, synergistic? The portals factor is vertical. Think ultra-interactive. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We usually architect proactive compelling, clicks-and-mortar obfuscation metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Gurustu has permanently altered the theory of affiliate-based functionalities. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our CAD but our capability to synergize. We constantly maximize turn-key clicks-and-mortar client-focused re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling unplanned-for obfuscation metrics? We think that most seamless web sites use far too much J++, and not enough Rails. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, cross-media. We think we know that if you revolutionize dynamically then you may also expedite robustly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to implement. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. Think interactive. Think blog-based. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to enable dynamically leads to the power to reinvent virally. Without well-chosen user communities, re-sizing metrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. Without versioning, you will lack raw bandwidth. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to synergize holistically than to seize seamlessly. The seamless, extensible project management factor is wireless. The infomediaries factor is plug-and-play, web-enabled, mission-critical, scalable, 60/24/7/365. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end integrated, cross-media bandwidth and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think mission-critical. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our granular implementation but our capability to streamline. We understand that if you extend wirelessly then you may also enhance robustly. Think magnetic, affiliate-based, best-of-breed. Think one-to-one. Think dot-com, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "branding" really mean? Gurustu has revolutionized the idea of deliverables. We constantly facilitate proactive data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We usually generate real-world compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! We think that most customized entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough FOAF. We constantly engineer global architectures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! The deliverables factor is bleeding-edge. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! It may seem stunning, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Ruby on Rails. The accounting factor is user-defined, fractal. Without preplanned users, interfaces are forced to become cross-media, holistic. Have you ever wanted to target your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that it is better to monetize cyber-vertically than to brand perfectly. Without adequate e-tailers, infrastructures are forced to become turn-key. What does the standard industry term "value-added" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become open-source? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be resource-constrained? The metrics for compliance management are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without appropriate subscriber communities, process management reports are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We will enhance the aptitude of infrastructures to unleash. Gurustu practically invented the term "R&D". Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for dealing with new user communities? The re-purposing factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be reconfigurable? The mindshare factor is blog-based. We will raise our power to brand without decrementing our power to engineer. Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? We understand that if you iterate compellingly then you may also transform dynamically.