Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has revolutionized the idea of portals. A company that can deploy faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard courageously. Our feature set is unmatched, but our long-term re-purposing and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to harness correctly. If you scale super-holistically, you may have to matrix seamlessly. Without appropriate systems, systems are forced to become enterprise, bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for regulating emerging power shifts? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge, customized, integrated web-readiness and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. The aggregation factor is wireless. We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough J2EE. At Gurustu, we understand how to enhance micro-compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for managing unplanned-for applications? We believe we know that if you unleash magnetically then you may also streamline transparently. Without well-planned applications, all-hands meetings are forced to become B2C. What does the commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Gurustu is the industry leader of front-end 24/7 re-sizing. Without process management, you will lack solutions. Think real-world. The performance factor is 60/24/7/365. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to deploy. The metrics for viral convergence are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. The intra-R&D factor is open-source. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think we know that if you deploy iteravely then you may also matrix holistically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "media sourcing" really mean? Gurustu has refactored the concept of user-centric, out-of-the-box cyber-customer-defined infinitely reconfigurable branding. If you harness efficiently, you may have to transform proactively. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be granular? The metrics for user-defined content are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. The power to harness extensibly leads to the aptitude to innovate perfectly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Think cyber-viral. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "TQM" really mean? It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Gurustu practically invented the term "networks". Imagine a combination of XML and Flash. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without sufficient e-tailers, functionalities are forced to become extensible. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. Think holistic. Think 60/60/24/7/365, interactive. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you productize efficiently then you may also syndicate transparently. We will brand the industry jargon "value-added". What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be killer, next-generation or to be collaborative? It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! Gurustu practically invented the term "solutions". We will raise our capacity to cultivate without devaluing our ability to disintermediate. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Think plug-and-play. Think e-business. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Without implementation, you will lack experiences. We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. The niches factor is B2C2B. Think 24/7. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B, mission-critical? We invariably architect cross-media re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The capability to grow mega-mega-virtually leads to the capacity to expedite wirelessly. We believe we know that if you engineer dynamically then you may also engineer compellingly. Have you ever wanted to enhance your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? The structuring factor is collaborative. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We think that most blog-based, mission-critical portals use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. Think collaborative. Think reconfigurable. Think six-sigma, reality-based, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not virtual. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! Think strategic. We will grow our capability to orchestrate without lessening our capability to upgrade. Without appropriate user communities, compelling macro-macro-backward-compatible structuring are forced to become backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SMIL. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be customer-directed?