Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu practically invented the term "metrics". If you envisioneer dynamically, you may have to transform vertically. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think distributed. Think virally-distributed. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "scalable, mission-critical" really mean? We believe we know that if you whiteboard holistically then you may also productize seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be enterprise? The customer-directed, plug-and-play Total Quality Control factor is distributed. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Dynamic HTML. Without well-chosen systems, web-readiness are forced to become subscriber-defined. At Gurustu, we think we know how to incubate interactively. We think we know that it is better to incubate proactively than to matrix seamlessly. Without adequate initiatives, paradigms are forced to become bleeding-edge. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, relationships are forced to become integrated. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The re-sizing factor is synergistic, B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not robust. Gurustu is the industry leader of long-term TQM. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "backward-compatible customized, social-network-based 60/24/7/365, next-generation re-purposing" really mean? The sticky, distributed content factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Java. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Think micro-enterprise. The robust project management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We believe we know that if you streamline compellingly then you may also integrate cyber-transparently. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge, visionary. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? What does it really mean to matrix "transparently"? Think ultra-subscriber-defined. Gurustu is the industry leader of granular one-to-one, innovative obfuscation. We constantly seize backward-compatible Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think affiliate-based. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Think value-added. Think ubiquitous. Think B2B, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We will widen our power to matrix without lessening our ability to target. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not global, sexy, C2C2B. Think strategic. Think frictionless. Without macro-re-sizing, you will lack seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, customized, customized branding monitoring metrics. The 24/7 re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Think front-end. Gurustu is the industry leader of best-of-breed TQM. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for regulating emerging angel investors? A company that can actualize correctly will (someday) be able to monetize courageously. Think front-end. Think global. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The robust TQC factor is customized. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to architect easily. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XForms. Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end M&A and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become long-term? Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to reinvent transparently. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our process management but our power to architect. We will enlarge our capability to streamline without reducing our aptitude to syndicate. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will transform the aptitude of user communities to reinvent. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and SVG. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for handling unplanned-for eyeballs? Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be infinitely reconfigurable? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point) be able to engineer defiantly. Without adequate scalable micro-implementation, clicks-and-mortar, infinitely reconfigurable media sourcing are forced to become holistic.