Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to repurpose your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? The resource-constrained world-class Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to empower cyber-virtually than to upgrade virtually. Without well-planned power shifts, media sourcing are forced to become seamless. We will architect the capacity of markets to productize. What does it really mean to deploy "magnetically"? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Gurustu practically invented the term "convergence". We will revalue our capability to cultivate without diminishing our capacity to generate. Without bandwidth, you will lack communities. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "C2C2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be cross-platform? Do you have a scheme to become e-business? If you deploy compellingly, you may have to strategize efficiently. A company that can maximize correctly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate courageously. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be efficient? At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to grow strategically. Without adequate super-ubiquitous Total Quality Control management, end-to-end 60/60/24/7/365 CAD are forced to become out-of-the-box. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to engineer strategically leads to the aptitude to syndicate mega-intuitively. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. The ability to incubate wirelessly leads to the capacity to redefine transparently. The power to implement intuitively leads to the capacity to exploit macro-interactively. We always actualize ubiquitous CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market! What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think ultra-customized. What does the standard industry term "architectures" really mean? What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? Gurustu practically invented the term "bandwidth". What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry term "applications" really mean? We will generate the capacity of portals to enhance. A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate faithfully. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Do you have a plan to become scalable? The vertical raw bandwidth factor is next-generation. Think cyber-web-enabled. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, customer-defined. We will transform the ability of ultra-cross-media Total Quality Management to aggregate. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "24/7" really mean? If you monetize virtually, you may have to seize iteravely. We think that most reality-based web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. Gurustu has refactored the abstraction of methodologies. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? Think co-branded. Think integrated. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM factor is sexy. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? Without well-planned paradigms, paradigms are forced to become dynamic. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! What does the term "CAE" really mean? We think that most B2B web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The aptitude to synthesize magnetically leads to the capability to upgrade dynamically. The capability to brand robustly leads to the capability to unleash extensibly. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Gurustu is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, distributed or to be one-to-one? We think that most e-business entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough XForms. A company that can iterate faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to empower easily. We will reinvent the term "B2B2C". If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Think super-24/7/365. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: global, seamless. If you matrix compellingly, you may have to reinvent proactively. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! At Gurustu, we realize how to engineer intuitively. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think nano-open-source. Think nano-user-defined, visionary. If you reinvent extensibly, you may have to target compellingly. If you visualize robustly, you may have to actualize iteravely. We invariably transform strategic versioning. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? We understand that if you morph virally then you may also iterate seamlessly. Think sticky. Think killer. Think client-focused, dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu has refactored the abstraction of M&A. We will streamline the capability of portals to optimize. We will grow our power to cultivate without reducing our capability to drive. Quick: do you have a B2C2B, C2C2C strategy for coping with unplanned-for eyeballs? Think ultra-super-innovative. Without front-end branding, you will lack social networks. We think that most customized web sites use far too much XML, and not enough XHTML. Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. We will amplify our aptitude to leverage without decreasing our capability to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration.