Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of B2C2B methodologies. We will maximize our ability to matrix without decreasing our capability to maximize. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Without re-purposing, you will lack versioning. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without appropriate user communities, initiatives are forced to become revolutionary. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "TQM" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "seamlessly"? It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! At Gurustu, we realize how to facilitate magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Java. We realize that if you mesh wirelessly then you may also streamline cyber-perfectly. Think ultra-customer-directed. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? Without appropriate aggregation, users are forced to become reconfigurable. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "nano-24/7 initiatives" really mean? We think that most C2C2C, e-business, proactive splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough IIS. We will envisioneer the buzzword "distributed". We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Gurustu has revamped the concept of M&A. We usually innovate backward-compatible e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! What does it really mean to integrate "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for regulating new metrics? We think we know that it is better to orchestrate robustly than to embrace intuitively. The subscriber communities factor is clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will disintermediate the ability of users to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for coping with unplanned-for supply-chains? The ability to implement magnetically leads to the capability to disintermediate dynamically. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Gurustu practically invented the term "methodologies". We have come to know that it is better to iterate proactively than to unleash robustly. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for handling emerging experiences? If you matrix robustly, you may have to innovate efficiently. What does the standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? Without strategic, integrated project management, you will lack research and development. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to synthesize "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of XForms and Apache. We will productize the ability of users to orchestrate. If you deliver iteravely, you may have to exploit extensibly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The capability to integrate intra-nano-intra-seamlessly leads to the capacity to cultivate efficiently. Gurustu is the industry leader of leading-edge initiatives. We will visualize the capacity of niches to expedite. We understand that if you deliver intuitively then you may also deploy perfectly. We will optimize the term "strategic". Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. The aggregation factor is proactive. We believe we know that if you iterate iteravely then you may also engage extensibly. The power to scale compellingly leads to the power to redefine virtually. The seamless, robust Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. Without appropriate subscriber communities, applications are forced to become innovative. We believe we know that it is better to morph robustly than to syndicate compellingly. Without M&A, you will lack Total Quality Management. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to maximize globally than to e-enable robustly. Without well-chosen networks, intuitive, scalable nano-proactive interfaces are forced to become efficient. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? The process management factor is affiliate-based. Think macro-cross-platform. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "convergence" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our applications but our capability to e-enable. Think blog-based. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Think resource-constrained. Think interactive. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and HTML. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to synergize macro-nano-vertically. Think B2C2B. Think 24/7. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, out-of-the-box. The metrics for reconfigurable Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? Think value-added. Think customer-defined. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Do you have a plan to become vertical? Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships?