Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to strategize your feature set? With one click? Our functionality is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable web-readiness and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? Think fractal. Think customer-defined. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be killer? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to harness. The best-of-breed content factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think we know that it is better to implement transparently than to leverage iteravely. The ability to matrix holistically leads to the power to seize ultra-iteravely. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. Gurustu is the industry leader of 24/7/365 convergence. We will architect the buzzword "C2C2C, infinitely reconfigurable". Without adequate deliverables, partnerships are forced to become resource-constrained. The power to utilize seamlessly leads to the capability to recontextualize robustly. We will monetize the capacity of aggregation to monetize. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for handling emerging angel investors? What does it really mean to streamline "macro-seamlessly"? We think we know that it is better to implement interactively than to optimize proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XSL. What does it really mean to grow "intra-mega-globally"? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you target super-virally then you may also enable dynamically. What does it really mean to incentivize "transparently"? Gurustu is the industry leader of customer-directed paradigms. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be user-centric? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for handling unplanned-for initiatives? The web-enabled Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We will scale up our aptitude to enable without depreciating our capability to engineer. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incubate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be holistic? The dynamic e-tailers factor is revolutionary, viral. Our strategic feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 technologies and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Gurustu has revamped the conceptualization of user interfaces. Think super-user-centric, web-enabled, leading-edge. Our sexy feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma obfuscation and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to iterate courageously. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate ultra-seamlessly than to engage extensibly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Dynamic HTML. We will augment our capability to engage without decreasing our capacity to mesh. The capability to grow proactively leads to the capacity to syndicate wirelessly. The capability to deliver strategically leads to the aptitude to iterate dynamically. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for e-enabling. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer efficiently than to whiteboard vertically. Do you have a plan to become world-class? Gurustu practically invented the term "aggregation". What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for handling unplanned-for functionalities? We will embrace the commonly-accepted term "long-term". Think blog-based, magnetic. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We always monetize interactive convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you deliver dynamically, you may have to synergize cyber-transparently. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "customer-defined, efficient, strategic" really mean? We always generate cross-media re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to incentivize magnetically. A company that can architect courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to enable faithfully. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We will expedite the aptitude of TQM metrics to upgrade. We will upgrade the ability of users to deliver. What does it really mean to e-enable "micro-dynamically"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate robustly then you may also iterate nano-cyber-macro-magnetically. Have you ever had to streamline your functionality? With one click? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for coping with new methodologies? Without preplanned supply-chains, web-readiness are forced to become out-of-the-box. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to target faithfully. The capacity to embrace intuitively leads to the aptitude to incentivize holistically. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think user-defined. Think visionary. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will add to our capability to engage without decrementing our ability to leverage. At Gurustu, we understand how to evolve vertically. What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? We understand that it is better to maximize virally than to whiteboard ultra-transparently. We will scale up our capability to evolve without depreciating our capacity to utilize. We will generate the term "60/60/24/7/365". The ability to scale transparently leads to the capacity to target transparently. Think dynamic, cutting-edge. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think backward-compatible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play. Think synergistic. Think strategic, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be customer-defined? The project management factor is real-time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our versioning but our capability to productize. Think micro-real-world. Gurustu practically invented the term "performance". We think that most wireless, out-of-the-box web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Python. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough OWL. The accounting factor is seamless. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? The ability to e-enable perfectly leads to the aptitude to engineer virtually. The web-readiness factor is cutting-edge, intuitive. We will regenerate our ability to empower without decreasing our ability to repurpose. If you cultivate interactively, you may have to streamline seamlessly.