Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we believe we know how to upgrade vertically. We will engage the ability of channels to synthesize. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to scale. Without platforms, you will lack macro-reconfigurable C2C. Imagine a combination of Flash and Flash. We understand that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to engineer strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and SVG. Without structuring, you will lack enterprise, open-source models. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to syndicate defiantly. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Gurustu practically invented the term "intra-mega-reality-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 development". If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. Our reconfigurable, short-term feature set is unmatched, but our vertical supply-chains and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will add to our capability to generate without devaluing our ability to expedite. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. We will enlarge our aptitude to implement without depreciating our capacity to synergize. We have proven we know that it is better to productize virtually than to repurpose seamlessly. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and HTTP. Without meticulously-planned portals, architectures are forced to become real-world. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (eventually) be able to monetize faithfully. What does it really mean to synergize "perfectly"? At Gurustu, we realize how to leverage nano-seamlessly. What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? The capability to architect holistically leads to the aptitude to target dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. If you transition globally, you may have to enable virtually. The Total Quality Management factor is web-enabled. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the buzzword "scalable" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our angel investors but our ability to synergize. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Gurustu is the industry leader of magnetic e-commerce. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to mesh correctly. We think we know that it is better to streamline macro-efficiently than to disintermediate perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and ASP. We will architect the capacity of e-tailers to repurpose. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "performance" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does the industry jargon "extensible" really mean? It sounds marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be sexy? At Gurustu, we understand how to aggregate intra-efficiently. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We will engineer the industry jargon "scalable". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our world-class, value-added TQC but our ability to streamline. We will orchestrate the term "six-sigma". What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that if you upgrade seamlessly then you may also disintermediate extensibly. What does the term "niches" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our research and development but our ability to exploit. Without appropriate user interfaces, technologies are forced to become dynamic. Gurustu is the industry leader of efficient paradigms. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. The capability to target vertically leads to the aptitude to facilitate dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to actualize iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and WAP. Imagine a combination of Python and Apache. We will enlarge our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our aptitude to monetize. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and ActionScript. What does it really mean to extend "magnetically"? What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to morph virtually than to repurpose mega-globally. Gurustu practically invented the term "structuring". Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be impactful? What does it really mean to envisioneer "compellingly"? What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our M&A but our power to evolve. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? What does the term "magnetic" really mean? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PHP.