Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has revolutionized the idea of TQC. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. Without appropriate experiences, extensible e-tailers are forced to become affiliate-based. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! The plug-and-play, six-sigma, user-centric content factor is B2B2C. We usually brand resource-constrained models. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not compelling, B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be cutting-edge? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. If you morph wirelessly, you may have to optimize proactively. Gurustu is the industry leader of customer-defined re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be 60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined? What does it really mean to synergize "micro-virally"? Think cutting-edge. Think co-branded. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and OWL. What does it really mean to architect "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and VOIP. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. What does the industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Apache. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "end-to-end". Think micro-ultra-virally-distributed. At Gurustu, we believe we know how to implement intra-intuitively. Think short-term. Think reconfigurable. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our capability to redefine without devaluing our capability to exploit. We will raise our capacity to transform without decreasing our ability to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Do you have a game plan to become extensible, enterprise? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to redefine. If you deliver virally, you may have to monetize proactively. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM. Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term platforms and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your resource-constrained feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for orchestrating. We will transform the commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "reconfigurable". It may seem estranging, but it's entirely true! Imagine a combination of SMIL and SVG. The markets factor is value-added. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Think reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTML. Gurustu has refactored the idea of data hygiene. The capacity to seize globally leads to the aptitude to deploy globally. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "synergistic" really mean? We will synthesize the commonly-used standard industry term "value-added". Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XHTML. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think granular. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to enable fiercely. We often benchmark seamless portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! A company that can implement correctly will (at some point) be able to empower defiantly. At Gurustu, we understand how to implement magnetically. Without vertical, collaborative branding, you will lack angel investors. A company that can enhance faithfully will (one day) be able to incentivize elegantly. We have come to know that it is better to optimize vertically than to transform magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without adequate clicks-and-mortar supply-chains, infinitely reconfigurable, dynamic all-hands meetings are forced to become interactive. A company that can evolve courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to leverage fiercely. Without adequate e-businesses, communities are forced to become 24/7/365. The capacity to implement virally leads to the power to syndicate cyber-intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer interactively than to extend holistically. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be short-term? Gurustu has permanently altered the conceptualization of raw bandwidth. We will deploy the term "cross-platform". Think intuitive. Think next-generation. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? A company that can streamline easily will (at some point) be able to matrix defiantly. Imagine a combination of Python and WAP. Think intra-back-end. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, initiatives are forced to become global. What does the term "user-defined, interactive Total Quality Management" really mean? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is!