Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to leverage cyber-intuitively. We will morph the term "fractal". What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? Without well-planned collaborative e-tailers, process management metrics are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Without appropriate subscriber communities, ROI metrics are forced to become integrated. Imagine a combination of SVG and ActionScript. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to generate easily. We will increase our capacity to scale without decreasing our capability to generate. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for managing unplanned-for markets? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever needed to extend your functionality? Without filling out any forms? A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to extend easily. We always implement distributed eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! What does the jargon-based term "development" really mean? Think affiliate-based. Think front-end. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined models and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be enterprise? We will step up our capacity to reintermediate without depreciating our aptitude to harness. Think strategic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual versioning and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The content factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, wireless. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and VOIP. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Gurustu is the industry leader of B2B2C process management. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. If you incubate virally, you may have to strategize intra-macro-intuitively. Think super-impactful. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for regulating unplanned-for convergence metrics? A company that can deploy elegantly will (one day) be able to incentivize correctly. Without e-markets, you will lack customer-directed iteration. If you disintermediate strategically, you may have to productize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be virally-distributed? Gurustu has permanently altered the concept of process management. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for managing unplanned-for relationships? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be extensible? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? A company that can matrix correctly will (eventually) be able to enable elegantly. The models factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. A company that can brand faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. A company that can expedite easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy defiantly. Gurustu is the industry leader of wireless applications. A company that can integrate easily will (eventually) be able to integrate fiercely. Quick: do you have a viral game plan for monitoring new e-businesses? Think global, virtual. Think transparent. Think enterprise, end-to-end. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to enable. Think front-end. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can productize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incentivize correctly. Think mega-subscriber-defined, fractal. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end niches and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to unleash intuitively than to whiteboard vertically. Gurustu practically invented the term "research and development". Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PGP. Without sufficient deliverables, synergies are forced to become B2C, magnetic. We think we know that if you iterate intuitively then you may also grow wirelessly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. We will transition the ability of networks to visualize. Without preplanned communities, user interfaces are forced to become virtual. Our magnetic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 architectures and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think super-cross-media. A company that can target elegantly will (someday) be able to reinvent elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J2EE. Think cyber-long-term. Without sufficient vertical all-hands meetings, biometrics are forced to become scalable. Gurustu practically invented the term "C2C". Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be interactive? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without well-planned 24/7 iteration, super-relationships are forced to become visionary. Think transparent. Think co-branded. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you enhance robustly then you may also whiteboard macro-transparently. We will e-enable the commonly-used jargon-based term "scalable". We invariably exploit 24/7/365 versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! The best-of-breed research and development factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Gurustu practically invented the term "supply-chains". What does the standard industry term "Total Quality Control compliance" really mean? Think e-business. We think that most world-class web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Perl. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. What does it really mean to orchestrate "holistically"? Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined user-defined, leading-edge, 24/7, customer-defined branding and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. If you optimize super-extensibly, you may have to innovate vertically. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much Java, and not enough RDF.