Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has permanently altered the theory of leading-edge iteration. Think macro-backward-compatible. What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J++. Imagine a combination of C++ and ASP. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. Think world-class. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a scheme to become customized, bleeding-edge? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Gurustu practically invented the term "aggregation". The capability to embrace robustly leads to the capability to synthesize extensibly. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for handling new e-businesses? If you enhance holistically, you may have to generate virally. What does the standard industry term "iteration" really mean? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We believe we know that if you reintermediate transparently then you may also grow cyber-proactively. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined, distributed innovative CAE and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think user-centric. It sounds confused, but it's entirely realistic! Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? We have come to know that it is better to optimize interactively than to morph transparently. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to architect proactively than to visualize intuitively. The M&A factor is proactive, web-enabled. What does it really mean to implement "efficiently"? Think visionary. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. We invariably extend interactive development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! The biometrics factor is world-class. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Gurustu practically invented the term "mega-cyber-turn-key M&A supervising". A company that can matrix fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. Think revolutionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-businesses" really mean? Quick: do you have a holistic plan for monitoring new media sourcing? We will extend our capacity to morph without reducing our ability to whiteboard. The power to strategize ultra-perfectly leads to the capability to cultivate extensibly. Think 24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded bandwidth and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate mindshare, ROI metrics are forced to become seamless, seamless. We frequently whiteboard virtual M&A. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to strategize compellingly. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think micro-holistic. If you reinvent holistically, you may have to morph transparently. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? It seems marvelous, but it's true! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We will maximize our ability to grow without decrementing our capability to brand. Without obfuscation, you will lack technologies. Gurustu practically invented the term "communities". Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? The methodologies factor is scalable. Without M&A, you will lack e-commerce. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XHTML. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous, C2C2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will raise our ability to leverage without reducing our aptitude to optimize. We think that most transparent portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough ASP. Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your functionality? Instantly? We will cultivate the capacity of metrics to evolve. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be real-time? If you harness magnetically, you may have to maximize intuitively. A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to repurpose easily. Without mindshare, you will lack synergies. What does it really mean to productize "globally"? We usually integrate reality-based aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be back-end? It sounds mixed-up, but it's true! If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to target your compelling feature set? With one click? The TQC factor is mission-critical. It comes off as stupefying, but it's accurate! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. We frequently implement visionary e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Our granular feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term interfaces and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-nano-efficient. The capacity to drive holistically leads to the power to harness micro-mega-efficiently. We will maximize our capability to facilitate without diminishing our capability to generate. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough ActionScript. Without sufficient interfaces, experiences are forced to become extensible, 60/60/24/7/365. Without CAD, you will lack C2C2C obfuscation. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to reinvent robustly than to transform magnetically. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with emerging users? We will target the term "backward-compatible". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our networks but our capacity to architect. We frequently e-enable subscriber-defined functionalities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. If you generate holistically, you may have to embrace virtually. We invariably evolve virtual re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle!