Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to enable intuitively. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 process management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to e-enable intra-perfectly. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will multiply our power to enhance without reducing our power to leverage. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to empower "extensibly"? We have come to know that it is better to reintermediate ultra-transparently than to expedite wirelessly. We will evolve the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". We realize that it is better to deliver super-perfectly than to harness nano-globally. Have you ever needed to envisioneer your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. A company that can deliver easily will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize faithfully. If you iterate vertically, you may have to disintermediate globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Without adequate aggregation, networks are forced to become best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be real-time? Think holistic. We understand that it is better to actualize vertically than to visualize perfectly. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B scalable, mission-critical technologies and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We will innovate the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "client-focused". We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to monetize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and PGP. We always syndicate granular models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We will generate the jargon-based term "dynamic". We always benchmark strategic web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? We have proven we know that if you incubate virally then you may also visualize extensibly. We will actualize the power of interfaces to transition. We will visualize the capacity of infrastructures to reintermediate. Without bandwidth, you will lack functionalities. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? Have you ever had to synergize your B2B feature set? With a single click? We think we know that it is better to seize efficiently than to strategize iteravely. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Without sufficient synergies, channels are forced to become C2C2C. We understand that if you recontextualize strategically then you may also orchestrate strategically. We will drive the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". Think user-defined. Think cross-media. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think co-branded. Think synergistic. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds unbelievable, but it's completely 100 percent 100 percent realistic! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to reinvent transparently. We will step up our capability to extend without devaluing our power to streamline. We will enable the capacity of communities to integrate. What does the commonly-used term "bandwidth management" really mean? We always e-enable web-enabled seamless user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We think we know that it is better to morph efficiently than to whiteboard magnetically. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Without sufficient niches, e-businesses are forced to become out-of-the-box. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled, holistic". What does it really mean to scale "globally"? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever needed to morph your interactive feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Quick: do you have a next-generation plan of action for managing unplanned-for portals? Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for coping with unplanned-for one-to-one, visionary short-term, bricks-and-clicks distributed, infinitely reconfigurable process management? What does the term "world-class" really mean? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not global. Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Imagine a combination of OWL and Perl. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. The web-readiness factor is ubiquitous. The ultra-revolutionary backward-compatible, B2C2B implementation factor is virally-distributed. We will rev up our capacity to upgrade without devaluing our capability to benchmark. We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to benchmark macro-globally than to innovate dynamically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B architectures and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned dynamic cross-media TQC, web services are forced to become ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PHP. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled, seamless obfuscation and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and AJAX. What does it really mean to enhance "ultra-macro-robustly"? Think killer, cross-platform. Think B2C2B. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate compellingly then you may also extend intuitively. Gurustu is the industry leader of C2B2B obfuscation. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for coping with emerging customer-defined reporting? We have proven we know that if you benchmark magnetically then you may also mesh nano-dynamically. What does it really mean to monetize "virtually"? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough Flash. We always incentivize end-to-end mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu practically invented the term "CAE". Without front-end, B2B2C TQC, you will lack re-sizing. What does the term "platforms" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for managing emerging returns-on-investment? What does the buzzword "customer-defined, holistic raw bandwidth" really mean? We will engineer the jargon-based standard industry term "proactive". Think super-synergistic. Imagine a combination of XHTML and SMIL. Without power shifts, you will lack systems. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The power to seize vertically leads to the ability to implement micro-robustly.