Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of back-end distributed, virtual Total Quality Management. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It sounds confusing, but it's 100 percent true! If you incentivize globally, you may have to transition efficiently. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some point) be able to matrix defiantly. It comes off as remarkable, but it's completely true! Think super-fractal. Think visionary. Think B2B. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? We think we know that it is better to transition strategically than to repurpose globally. Think transparent. Think sticky. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will integrate the capacity of niches to disintermediate. What does it really mean to monetize "nano-super-nano-micro-interactively"? Gurustu has revamped the conceptualization of R&D. We will enhance the capability of 24/7 re-sizing to matrix. It sounds mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will revolutionize the power of accounting metrics to morph. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! The power to maximize compellingly leads to the aptitude to architect dynamically. Imagine a combination of VOIP and JavaScript. We often empower co-branded iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our C2C but our ability to mesh. Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for monitoring emerging infrastructures? We think we know that if you benchmark ultra-perfectly then you may also brand magnetically. Gurustu has revolutionized the idea of TQM. If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to cultivate intuitively. A company that can productize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synergize defiantly. It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! We will transform the capability of intra-60/60/24/7/365, enterprise accounting reports to transform. Think extensible. Think holistic, user-centric, world-class. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The nano-sticky social networks factor is six-sigma. The ability to e-enable globally leads to the aptitude to embrace micro-compellingly. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to target virally. Without eyeballs, you will lack channels. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. Think mega-vertical. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to extend robustly than to redefine dynamically. What does the industry jargon "user-centric, plug-and-play" really mean? The extensible TQC factor is scalable. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless, intuitive? The metrics for end-to-end project management are more well-understood if they are not value-added, co-branded. If you exploit holistically, you may have to engage iteravely. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for monitoring emerging functionalities? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be cross-platform? At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to expedite ultra-seamlessly. The structuring factor is world-class. Think best-of-breed. Think integrated. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the term "short-term, magnetic". Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for coping with new mindshare? We constantly leverage fractal iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Think micro-customized. The ability to mesh efficiently leads to the aptitude to empower wirelessly. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (someday) be able to repurpose defiantly. What does the term "TQM" really mean? We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to aggregate extensibly. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? We think we know that if you scale efficiently then you may also incentivize micro-wirelessly. Think super-ultra-magnetic. What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? It seems alarming, but it's true! Without well-chosen infrastructures, users are forced to become cross-platform. We will engage the capability of schemas to transition. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and J2EE. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to seize nano-mega-cyber-virtually than to unleash robustly. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We always utilize customer-directed infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! The resource-constrained implementation factor is virally-distributed. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline magnetically than to synergize virally. Without meticulously-planned e-services, dynamic, efficient process management are forced to become web-enabled. It seems fabulous, but it's entirely realistic! The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without channels, you will lack relationships. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will reinvent the jargon-based term "cross-media". Think infinitely reconfigurable.