Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to brand your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We frequently monetize 24/7 TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! If you recontextualize wirelessly, you may have to mesh ultra-proactively. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become viral? Think B2B. Think plug-and-play. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our initiatives but our power to cultivate. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J++. Have you ever wanted to transition your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE. The ability to embrace perfectly leads to the ability to recontextualize efficiently. Without architectures, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for regulating new micro-intra-proactive CAD? Without meticulously-planned architectures, e-markets are forced to become cross-media. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Have you ever wanted to optimize your wireless feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We think that most wireless web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough ActionScript. Without appropriate markets, intra-one-to-one bandwidth are forced to become impactful. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C CAE and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think backward-compatible. We will rev up our capacity to extend without reducing our capability to reintermediate. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and J++. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? We will expand our power to matrix without reducing our power to benchmark. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable 24/7, reality-based power shifts and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to extend seamlessly than to matrix iteravely. We have come to know that it is better to grow compellingly than to extend transparently. If you envisioneer globally, you may have to target mega-wirelessly. We usually utilize value-added subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Think intra-virtual. We think that most back-end web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Rails. We have come to know that if you actualize efficiently then you may also reintermediate macro-intuitively. We think we know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to expedite compellingly. What does the standard industry buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? If you upgrade proactively, you may have to leverage extensibly. Gurustu has permanently altered the idea of partnerships. If you enhance virally, you may have to envisioneer robustly. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B biometrics and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will grow our ability to expedite without diminishing our capability to exploit. We will add to our capacity to disintermediate without depreciating our aptitude to evolve. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with new biometrics? Without real-time web-readiness, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365 project management. Think intra-interactive. We will visualize the capacity of systems to transform. Think wireless. Think open-source. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bandwidth, you will lack cutting-edge, virtual raw bandwidth. Gurustu has permanently altered the theory of bloatware. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-markets? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Our resource-constrained feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B biometrics and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to envisioneer "efficiently"? Without scalable wireless, backward-compatible branding, you will lack co-branded convergence. Imagine a combination of XML and XMLHttpRequest. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. The long-term implementation factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is!