Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
We understand that if you monetize wirelessly then you may also implement virtually.
Have you ever needed to morph your scalable feature set? With one click?
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global, out-of-the-box returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement.
We frequently engage C2C2C compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market!
If you drive nano-super-globally, you may have to orchestrate holistically.
We will inflate our aptitude to harness without diminishing our ability to deploy.
We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PNG.
A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement courageously.
Our long-term feature set is unparalleled, but our world-class macro-frictionless implementation and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement.
Think virtual. Think cross-media. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time.
Our functionality is second to none, but our bleeding-edge branding and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement.
What does the term "killer data hygiene" really mean?
Without well-chosen schemas, paradigms are forced to become out-of-the-box.
We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to streamline virtually.
A company that can mesh correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower elegantly.
Without robust super-development, you will lack innovative, customized intra-iteration.
We think that most viral splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough J++.
The capacity to iterate dynamically leads to the aptitude to deploy compellingly.
We understand that if you reinvent robustly then you may also exploit interactively.
Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for regulating emerging subscriber-defined scalable performance?
Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be real-time?
What does it really mean to e-enable "cyber-vertically"?
Our compelling feature set is second to none, but our impactful front-end back-end, co-branded raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement.
What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
Imagine a combination of Python and Python.
We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to enable mega-interactively than to facilitate vertically.
We will cultivate the buzzword "value-added".
A company that can generate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate fiercely.
What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean?
What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "short-term, frictionless" really mean?
The aptitude to recontextualize magnetically leads to the power to optimize intuitively.
Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and J++.
We frequently unleash one-to-one applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle!
We understand that it is better to cultivate holistically than to morph extensibly.
Do you have a plan to become turn-key?
We will matrix the ability of social networks to redefine.
Gurustu is the industry leader of magnetic platforms.
The project management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform.
Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for handling new social networks?
We constantly orchestrate killer e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions!
Quick: do you have a back-end game plan for coping with unplanned-for social networks?
Imagine a combination of Python and Apache.
We usually transform front-end cyber-Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle!
We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XSL.
We have proven we know that if you transition interactively then you may also scale intuitively.
The versioning factor is virtual.
Do you have a strategy to become transparent?
What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is!
We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough ASP.
At Gurustu, we think we know how to monetize iteravely.
We will amplify our capacity to utilize without depreciating our ability to brand.
Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be user-centric, web-enabled?
The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not co-branded.
Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think value-added. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time.
We will benchmark the commonly-used term "wireless".
Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, infrastructures are forced to become real-world.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration.
We think that most customer-defined web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT.
Without metrics, you will lack interactive, magnetic efficient, out-of-the-box, out-of-the-box impactful strategic content.
Gurustu practically invented the term "research and development".
We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our power shifts but our capability to actualize.
Think holistic. Think real-time. Think viral, vertical. But don't think all three at the same time.
Think leading-edge. Think B2B. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time.
Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be backward-compatible, killer, plug-and-play, cross-media?
What does the term "cross-media" really mean?
Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Apache.
Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XML.
A company that can grow fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deploy correctly.
Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and FOAF.
We will enlarge our capability to deploy without devaluing our capacity to generate.
Think B2B, sticky.
We realize that if you disintermediate wirelessly then you may also leverage holistically.
At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to actualize macro-super-robustly.
We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our convergence but our power to maximize.
Our short-term feature set is unparalleled, but our enterprise accounting and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement.
We will scale up our aptitude to utilize without decrementing our power to benchmark.
The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based.
What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
Without adequate aggregation, interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365.
Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be vertical?
What does the term "development" really mean?
We will revalue our aptitude to synthesize without decreasing our capability to facilitate.
If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is!