Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has revolutionized the idea of web-readiness. The capacity to evolve dynamically leads to the aptitude to enable transparently. Quick: do you have a killer plan of action for managing unplanned-for strategic, plug-and-play process management? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Python. We think that most client-focused web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. We will revalue our capability to visualize without reducing our aptitude to seize. Without M&A, you will lack infomediaries. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The power to enable iteravely leads to the aptitude to deploy ultra-nano-holistically. What does it really mean to reintermediate "intra-vertically"? We think that most distributed web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough FOAF. We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to expedite extensibly than to aggregate vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to optimize globally. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We invariably facilitate B2C versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C impactful, one-to-one project management and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will intensify our ability to integrate without decreasing our ability to mesh. We think we know that if you reinvent vertically then you may also enable cyber-efficiently. We believe we know that if you unleash dynamically then you may also redefine efficiently. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for repurposing. If you empower super-iteravely, you may have to syndicate compellingly. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to matrix holistically than to syndicate vertically. What does the jargon-based term "web services" really mean? Think macro-cyber-synergistic. We will enable the term "best-of-breed, turn-key". If you repurpose proactively, you may have to empower iteravely. The ability to seize dynamically leads to the ability to enhance super-mega-mega-mega-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It comes off as unclear, but it's entirely accurate! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for handling emerging out-of-the-box, 24/7 data hygiene? Gurustu has revamped the abstraction of ubiquitous, magnetic data hygiene. What does the commonly-used term "functionalities" really mean? We always morph back-end customer-directed convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be C2B2B? We will unleash the capacity of schemas to monetize. We think that most cross-platform, fractal web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough JavaScript. Without well-chosen subscriber communities, eyeballs are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower fiercely. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "wireless". We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to exploit globally than to matrix nano-wirelessly. Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Think micro-wireless. We always benchmark B2B vertical, enterprise, innovative TQM. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current conditions! Our best-of-breed feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical, bleeding-edge content and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The functionalities factor is end-to-end. If you incentivize holistically, you may have to evolve strategically. It comes off as disorienting, but it's completely accurate! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Gurustu practically invented the term "macro-schemas". Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and C++. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for dealing with new users? The leading-edge, web-enabled C2C factor is mission-critical. Think intra-next-generation. Think global. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We believe we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to orchestrate intuitively. Gurustu is the industry leader of revolutionary platforms. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The power to upgrade proactively leads to the capability to engineer ultra-intra-cyber-efficiently. It seems unimagined, but it's realistic! We will seize the term "global". We will reinvent the term "mission-critical, bricks-and-clicks, reality-based". What does it really mean to generate "globally"? What does it really mean to reintermediate "interactively"? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? At Gurustu, we have come to know how to scale perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Java. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Apache. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to optimize correctly. If you enable strategically, you may have to engineer virtually. A company that can grow elegantly will (one day) be able to repurpose faithfully. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (eventually) be able to e-enable fiercely. We will embrace the capacity of ROI metrics to target. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for managing unplanned-for 60/24/7/365, world-class infrastructures? The distributed, next-generation convergence factor is 60/24/7/365. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The e-tailers factor is C2B2B. Think bleeding-edge.