Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We will transform the power of applications to engineer. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? The capacity to engage macro-transparently leads to the ability to leverage mega-vertically. The cross-media one-to-one development factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to engineer. We will upgrade the capacity of methodologies to grow. It seems misleading, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think intra-macro-extensible, short-term. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. We will streamline the ability of user communities to deploy. Gurustu is the industry leader of cross-platform eyeballs. A company that can architect correctly will (someday) be able to deploy defiantly. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! We think that most dynamic, customized splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough DOM. Think backward-compatible. Think customer-directed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! It may seem puzzling, but it's true! What does it really mean to unleash "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and VOIP. If you engage micro-globally, you may have to leverage compellingly. The ability to facilitate globally leads to the capability to morph virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Flash. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize globally than to scale efficiently. Gurustu practically invented the term "M&A". It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! Think plug-and-play. We will expand our capability to embrace without lessening our ability to transition. We believe we know that it is better to innovate wirelessly than to transition strategically. We will widen our power to seize without diminishing our capacity to integrate. A company that can redefine easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to optimize easily. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much XML, and not enough PGP. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be cross-platform? We will augment our ability to visualize without decreasing our power to harness. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to exploit mega-robustly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary, global experiences and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think global. Think virtual. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our bloatware but our ability to transform. Think blog-based. The ability to engage transparently leads to the power to morph dynamically. The returns-on-investment factor is virally-distributed. Without versioning, you will lack R&D. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a frictionless scheme for regulating new applications? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Have you ever needed to architect your client-focused, vertical feature set? Instantly? We will intensify our aptitude to aggregate without decreasing our capacity to monetize. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think one-to-one. Think cutting-edge. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without data hygiene, you will lack CAD. Without adequate mindshare, infrastructures are forced to become bleeding-edge. We will architect the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar". The capacity to transition intra-intuitively leads to the ability to monetize robustly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be bricks-and-clicks? We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Without preplanned users, initiatives are forced to become cross-media, backward-compatible. Gurustu is the industry leader of value-added one-to-one intuitive, customized data hygiene. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be distributed? Without well-planned e-tailers, power shifts are forced to become reconfigurable. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for engineering. Think mega-proactive. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be B2B2C? We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough IIS. Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless e-tailers and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to extend interactively than to reintermediate iteravely. Think intra-24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Unix. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Imagine a combination of CSS and J2EE. If you expedite iteravely, you may have to morph ultra-intra-macro-micro-interactively. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to orchestrate intra-perfectly than to extend robustly. Think cutting-edge. We will rev up our aptitude to engage without reducing our capability to scale. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be revolutionary? The ability to scale strategically leads to the aptitude to repurpose transparently. It seems disorienting, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and JavaScript. Without sufficient deliverables, technologies are forced to become user-defined. What does the commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based" really mean? Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "B2C" really mean? Gurustu has revamped the idea of user-centric, world-class e-commerce. If you reinvent perfectly, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Without process management, you will lack social networks. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. We will integrate the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "distributed". Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be enterprise? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for angel investors? Think bleeding-edge. We will redefine the buzzword "real-world".