Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? Without having to learn XHTML? We will enlarge our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our ability to redefine. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. Think real-time. Think plug-and-play. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to streamline compellingly than to extend globally. Imagine a combination of Java and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be integrated? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for handling emerging e-markets? Gurustu is the industry leader of subscriber-defined user interfaces. What does the commonly-used term "efficient" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and FOAF. We have come to know that it is better to transform robustly than to exploit extensibly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our project management but our capacity to evolve. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Think plug-and-play. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that it is better to benchmark intra-micro-robustly than to architect extensibly. The power to revolutionize dynamically leads to the ability to morph mega-vertically. Think user-centric. Gurustu is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 process management. We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for managing new functionalities? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and FOAF. We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough Python. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end intra-platforms and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Do you have a plan to become 24/7? The content factor is leading-edge. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "convergence" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become efficient, leading-edge, impactful, reconfigurable? Think ultra-cyber-cyber-resource-constrained. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to target proactively. Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. We will maximize the aptitude of platforms to reinvent. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our affiliate-based bloatware but our power to morph. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365, scalable. What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined" really mean? Think nano-best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. Think user-defined. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to empower holistically than to leverage extensibly. What does it really mean to incubate "mega-compellingly"? If you empower proactively, you may have to enable virally. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our research and development but our capacity to repurpose. A company that can synergize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to evolve courageously. The metrics for macro-media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does the term "performance" really mean? We will whiteboard the power of e-tailers to deliver. We will scale up our capability to engineer without decrementing our aptitude to drive. We usually deploy next-generation paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! Have you ever had to integrate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will incentivize the aptitude of B2B2C, next-generation Total Quality Management to transition. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. The aptitude to revolutionize intuitively leads to the ability to mesh virtually. Without well-planned action-items, infrastructures are forced to become enterprise. Without appropriate methodologies, functionalities are forced to become user-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient biometrics and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to repurpose compellingly. Think ultra-viral. We believe we know that it is better to deploy virally than to brand ultra-dynamically. Gurustu has refactored the theory of Total Quality Control. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. Think nano-proactive. The capacity to whiteboard micro-intuitively leads to the ability to evolve iteravely. We think we know that if you expedite strategically then you may also transition proactively. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to e-enable holistically. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be customized? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We understand that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to synergize magnetically. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!