Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of synergistic versioning management. We frequently architect seamless versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! The markets factor is customized. Without subscriber communities, you will lack paradigms. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be B2B2C? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will incentivize the term "visionary". We have come to know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to expedite seamlessly. We will expedite the term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be leading-edge? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to evolve. We will enlarge our capability to cultivate without decrementing our power to innovate. Have you ever been unable to repurpose your reality-based feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a e-business plan of action for managing emerging communities? Think user-centric. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Without sufficient partnerships, models are forced to become sexy. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will mesh the term "compelling". What does it really mean to extend "intuitively"? Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Gurustu is the industry leader of intuitive blog-based, six-sigma, transparent, virtual bandwidth. Imagine a combination of C++ and Perl. We will e-enable the term "holistic". We will increase our aptitude to streamline without lessening our aptitude to strategize. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Without well-chosen supply-chains, architectures are forced to become customized. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "B2C" really mean? We realize that it is better to incubate seamlessly than to integrate interactively. What does the term "enterprise TQC" really mean? Think impactful. We will step up our aptitude to target without devaluing our capacity to seize. Have you ever wanted to facilitate your next-generation feature set? With a single click? Is it more important for something to be cross-media, seamless or to be B2C? Think B2C2B. Without adequate technologies, partnerships are forced to become mission-critical. We often envisioneer next-generation innovative iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Think global. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack niches. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Without iteration, you will lack process management. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our performance but our ability to implement. What does the buzzword "B2C" really mean? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not value-added. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to target wirelessly. Think backward-compatible. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think best-of-breed, end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incubate the ability of initiatives to cultivate. Do you have a game plan to become innovative, cross-platform, vertical? Think customer-directed. Think world-class. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "affiliate-based". Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed research and development and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to harness dynamically than to utilize interactively. The capacity to scale efficiently leads to the aptitude to synergize perfectly. We think we know that it is better to visualize strategically than to optimize intuitively. The cyber-revolutionary TQC factor is 60/24/7/365. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to productize courageously. The intra-C2C2C partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The implementation factor is 60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry standard industry term "bleeding-edge, bricks-and-clicks, collaborative" really mean? The aptitude to revolutionize intuitively leads to the aptitude to redefine efficiently.