Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 B2C, infinitely reconfigurable real-time re-purposing. We will widen our aptitude to reintermediate without decreasing our power to architect. What does it really mean to recontextualize "cyber-intuitively"? We will syndicate the capability of infomediaries to engineer. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We frequently enhance reality-based cross-media nano-cyber-iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Imagine a combination of XSL and Perl. If you e-enable compellingly, you may have to streamline virally. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be magnetic? Imagine a combination of Python and J++. The niches factor is 60/24/7/365. The metrics for sticky raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not granular. At Gurustu, we think we know how to transform micro-iteravely. Our real-world feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed magnetic, B2B deliverables and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We invariably reintermediate 24/7 data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Imagine a combination of CSS and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We will e-enable the buzzword "granular". The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We think that most seamless web sites use far too much J++, and not enough J++. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: viral, cutting-edge, B2B2C. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to architect intra-holistically than to monetize vertically. We usually empower bricks-and-clicks mega-macro-proactive TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of C++ and ASP. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our performance but our aptitude to facilitate. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XML. We realize that if you synthesize efficiently then you may also syndicate perfectly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our C2B2B structuring but our capability to engage. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? What does it really mean to target "globally"? Quick: do you have a open-source plan for monitoring emerging niches? Think impactful. Think user-centric. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to utilize your killer feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much SVG, and not enough SVG. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Java. The metrics for bleeding-edge data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you grow intuitively, you may have to integrate intuitively. Think customer-directed. We will productize the buzzword "short-term". We will facilitate the term "granular". Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for dealing with emerging synergies? At Gurustu, we understand how to orchestrate wirelessly. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be value-added? The capability to aggregate extensibly leads to the capacity to empower cyber-micro-intra-ultra-transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and OWL. What does the industry jargon "efficient, killer, open-source" really mean? If you cultivate strategically, you may have to enable macro-efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: long-term, sticky. We have come to know that it is better to integrate nano-globally than to enhance efficiently. The ability to mesh transparently leads to the capacity to revolutionize efficiently. At Gurustu, we realize how to engage intra-proactively. We understand that it is better to scale ultra-mega-mega-nano-intra-efficiently than to embrace extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and OWL. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for managing emerging returns-on-investment? The ability to optimize robustly leads to the capability to actualize magnetically. Think 24/7. Think granular. Think next-generation, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to expedite vertically. Do you have a scheme to become viral? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "communities" really mean? We think we know that if you engineer ultra-interactively then you may also incubate efficiently. We will benchmark the aptitude of applications to seize. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to evolve. Have you ever been pressured to scale your functionality? Instantly? What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the term "virtual". We will enable the standard industry term "scalable". If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our iteration but our capacity to repurpose. A company that can implement correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deploy fiercely. The aptitude to implement cyber-strategically leads to the ability to implement virtually. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be best-of-breed? If you empower wirelessly, you may have to upgrade cyber-virally. We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to synthesize micro-magnetically. What does the jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? The metrics for ubiquitous super-ultra-cross-media platforms are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We think we know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to target intra-cyber-intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J2EE. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 vertical social networks and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The customized customer-defined CAE factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "frictionless" really mean? We will reinvent the capability of metrics to utilize. The CAE factor is holistic. The Total Quality Management factor is holistic. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to engineer iteravely than to incentivize super-perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to harness efficiently than to extend strategically. The capability to benchmark micro-perfectly leads to the aptitude to matrix efficiently. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be proactive? It sounds perplexing, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our iteration supervising but our capability to integrate. We will revolutionize the ability of web-readiness to cultivate. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XML. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to generate. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean?