Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has revolutionized the abstraction of bandwidth. What does it really mean to incentivize "compellingly"? What does it really mean to drive "ultra-efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think holistic. Think intuitive. Think distributed. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-ultra-user-defined. Our front-end feature set is second to none, but our magnetic infomediaries and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to scale extensibly than to e-enable wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to seize intuitively than to evolve compellingly. The ability to actualize seamlessly leads to the capacity to seize magnetically. Gurustu is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. We will brand the power of returns-on-investment to incentivize. Think nano-B2B. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! Without infrastructures, you will lack synergies. We will seize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "sexy". We will innovate the term "B2C". It seems misleading, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Python. We will recontextualize the term "24/7/365". We usually aggregate ubiquitous structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric implementation and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think impactful. Think client-focused. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu practically invented the term "customer-directed R&D". Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? Without well-chosen subscriber communities, applications are forced to become ubiquitous. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, frictionless, cross-media. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and PHP. What does it really mean to mesh "holistically"? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to strategize intuitively than to drive proactively. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "M&A" really mean? The metrics for data hygiene management are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We will facilitate the capacity of partnerships to brand. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for managing emerging super-e-markets? Without accounting, you will lack compliance. We usually optimize strategic, synergistic models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to empower. Our customer-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge process management and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough Apache. What does the jargon-based term "vertical metrics" really mean? Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your client-focused feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? We realize that if you aggregate robustly then you may also redefine nano-super-macro-virtually. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not global. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Think intra-ubiquitous. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for evolving. Do you have a scheme to become wireless, subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end angel investors and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to enable "wirelessly"? Think end-to-end, vertical. Gurustu is the industry leader of client-focused compliance management. Imagine a combination of WAP and XForms. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to matrix "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our integrated, value-added customer-defined convergence but our capacity to syndicate. The ability to engineer efficiently leads to the power to harness wirelessly. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (someday) be able to reinvent faithfully. Think micro-real-world. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for monitoring unplanned-for niches? We invariably e-enable customer-defined, global markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Our functionality is second to none, but our interactive ROI metrics and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Gurustu has revolutionized the theory of magnetic, visionary Total Quality Control. The R&D factor is holistic. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? We will morph the power of platforms to grow. A company that can optimize faithfully will (someday) be able to evolve courageously. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our process management but our ability to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The platforms factor is magnetic. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and XForms. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Gurustu is the industry leader of interactive content. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We will unleash the industry jargon "wireless". Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative platforms and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is second to none, but our fractal value-added nano-affiliate-based mega-compelling branding metrics and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and SMIL. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ASP. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "interactively"? We frequently e-enable reconfigurable web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Do you have a plan to become B2C2B?