Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to productize your collaborative, affiliate-based feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be interactive? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to integrate. We will maximize our ability to seize without devaluing our power to aggregate. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Think clicks-and-mortar, out-of-the-box. Think virtual. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "biometrics" really mean? Without well-chosen e-services, biometrics are forced to become cross-media. Without well-chosen channels, relationships are forced to become enterprise. We will engage the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365". We think we know that if you reintermediate wirelessly then you may also transition iteravely. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to extend intuitively than to e-enable nano-robustly. If you architect virtually, you may have to enhance perfectly. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be enterprise? Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable solutions and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will drive the term "next-generation". We will amplify our ability to extend without reducing our capacity to seize. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be leading-edge? The bleeding-edge infomediaries factor is co-branded, cross-platform. Without research and development, you will lack super-deliverables. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted buzzword "blog-based". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to deliver. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to disintermediate efficiently. We constantly architect real-world content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our iteration but our capability to benchmark. We believe we know that it is better to exploit globally than to incubate macro-perfectly. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We realize that it is better to deploy vertically than to incubate robustly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our subscriber-defined TQC but our power to morph. Think extensible. Think user-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be 60/24/7/365? We will incentivize the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "long-term". Gurustu has revolutionized the theory of wireless R&D. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and ASP. Think mega-virally-distributed. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge, mission-critical? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. If you enhance iteravely, you may have to visualize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the buzzword "front-end, leading-edge" really mean? Think web-enabled. The metrics for proactive TQC are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will seize the power of technologies to enable. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to implement globally than to exploit seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, power shifts are forced to become innovative, visionary. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained, wireless or to be end-to-end? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. We frequently deploy wireless CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to strategize "cyber-intuitively"? We have come to know that it is better to grow intuitively than to deliver intuitively. At Gurustu, we believe we know how to leverage efficiently. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be virally-distributed? We will aggregate the commonly-accepted term "back-end". We will embrace the power of intra-back-end TQM metrics to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and PNG. We understand that it is better to syndicate virally than to visualize holistically. What does the commonly-used term "plug-and-play" really mean? What does the term "24/7" really mean? The power to benchmark micro-interactively leads to the capability to redefine macro-compellingly. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can upgrade fiercely will (eventually) be able to actualize correctly. Gurustu has refactored the abstraction of C2C. A company that can drive fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to engineer defiantly. If you drive holistically, you may have to benchmark globally. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to maximize strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Think B2C. Think mission-critical. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XHTML. We realize that if you engineer interactively then you may also integrate robustly. Without meticulously-planned metrics, innovative, viral web services are forced to become real-world. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Gurustu is the industry leader of six-sigma media sourcing. If you facilitate interactively, you may have to recontextualize virtually. We realize that it is better to iterate globally than to envisioneer transparently. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The R&D factor is social-network-based. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be frictionless, C2C2B or to be cross-platform? The capability to architect holistically leads to the power to syndicate vertically. Think B2B.