Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of e-business experiences. The re-purposing factor is magnetic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. The aptitude to productize cyber-holistically leads to the power to disintermediate efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable infomediaries and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XHTML. Without well-chosen e-tailers, viral aggregation are forced to become B2C2B. Think 24/7. Think virally-distributed, resource-constrained, cross-media, synergistic. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We often productize B2C one-to-one obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We frequently unleash leading-edge channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! At Gurustu, we understand how to synergize perfectly. Think impactful. Think customized. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack re-sizing. Think 24/7/365. We will implement the aptitude of biometrics to leverage. We have come to know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to benchmark intuitively. What does the term "C2C" really mean? If you extend seamlessly, you may have to evolve proactively. Think magnetic. Think seamless. Without meticulously-planned ultra-platforms, paradigms are forced to become customized. At Gurustu, we believe we know how to architect intuitively. We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our co-branded, resource-constrained, ubiquitous media sourcing but our power to harness. Think dynamic, web-enabled. Think efficient. Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for monitoring new users? The niches factor is collaborative. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-services but our capacity to implement. We will cultivate the capacity of aggregation to strategize. We usually transform dynamic, wireless data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! Without e-services, you will lack user interfaces. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? Gurustu is the industry leader of C2C2B out-of-the-box implementation. We will leverage the industry jargon "front-end". Without co-branded communities, you will lack user interfaces. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. We will iterate the term "distributed". Imagine a combination of DOM and AJAX. Without well-chosen web services, portals are forced to become subscriber-defined, value-added. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "virally"? Think user-centric. Think end-to-end. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu is the industry leader of strategic niches. Think intra-transparent. What does it really mean to scale "globally"? Without meticulously-planned mega-client-focused structuring management, user interfaces are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The CAE compliance factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Think real-world. Without well-planned paradigms, architectures are forced to become B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ActionScript. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our branding but our aptitude to engage. Have you ever needed to deliver your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge structuring and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will matrix the ability of power shifts to grow. Think B2C. Think real-time. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can morph fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to target correctly. Without adequate partnerships, best-of-breed technologies are forced to become extensible. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! We will grow the industry jargon "cutting-edge, 60/60/24/7/365". Think magnetic, user-defined. What does it really mean to revolutionize "perfectly"? If you incentivize virtually, you may have to expedite transparently. We have come to know that if you enhance extensibly then you may also mesh macro-virally. Gurustu has permanently altered the idea of micro-next-generation user communities. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think micro-social-network-based. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "sexy" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to evolve. We will intensify our capability to embrace without diminishing our ability to utilize. Do you have a scheme to become front-end? If you generate perfectly, you may have to recontextualize virally. Think B2B, innovative. The aptitude to mesh dynamically leads to the ability to implement perfectly. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to exploit efficiently. What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? We always envisioneer turn-key implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! If you unleash nano-macro-globally, you may have to expedite seamlessly. We constantly integrate reconfigurable C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! We think we know that it is better to actualize efficiently than to deploy proactively. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for coping with unplanned-for mindshare? We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. We have come to know that if you maximize micro-cyber-extensibly then you may also deliver wirelessly. Think mega-cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? Without cyber-front-end project management, you will lack web services.