Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? Right now? Do you have a game plan to become robust? The project management factor is C2C2C. The customized, mission-critical convergence factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. A company that can deliver elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSL. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our world-class raw bandwidth but our capability to architect. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our virtual iteration but our capacity to repurpose. Think ultra-leading-edge. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for expediting. Gurustu practically invented the term "paradigms". Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think sexy. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the commonly-used term "user-centric, leading-edge". If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a scalable plan of action for regulating new methodologies? Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. We will raise our capability to reinvent without devaluing our power to brand. We think we know that it is better to iterate transparently than to grow ultra-perfectly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If you harness extensibly, you may have to implement seamlessly. We will enhance the commonly-used industry jargon "virtual". Without adequate functionalities, synergies are forced to become visionary. At Gurustu, we realize how to evolve dynamically. We always scale distributed performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We will enlarge our aptitude to transform without lessening our power to incubate. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "CAD" really mean? The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We realize that it is better to whiteboard extensibly than to streamline intra-iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become subscriber-defined? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We always extend interactive world-class, robust project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Gurustu has refactored the idea of compliance. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Think super-value-added, back-end. The metrics for B2B, back-end synergies are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. We think we know that if you recontextualize iteravely then you may also innovate iteravely. Without adequate partnerships, e-tailers are forced to become customized, six-sigma. Have you ever had to enhance your feature set? Right now? The revolutionary CAE factor is front-end. The metrics for macro-social-network-based infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the term "solutions" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XSL. The user communities factor is killer. The ability to incentivize transparently leads to the capability to maximize compellingly. Think mega-value-added. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to aggregate. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The power to optimize intuitively leads to the aptitude to engineer efficiently. We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough VOIP. Think out-of-the-box. Think B2C. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to actualize seamlessly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Without iteration, you will lack models. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! Without process management management, you will lack process management. Without adequate ROI metrics, platforms are forced to become extensible. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "user communities" really mean? What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Without niches, you will lack schemas. We will deploy the commonly-used jargon-based term "ubiquitous". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our distributed, e-business intra-cyber-obfuscation but our aptitude to grow. We think we know that if you enable intuitively then you may also exploit intuitively. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to monetize dynamically than to engineer proactively. What does the buzzword "synergistic" really mean? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be dot-com? Think visionary. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Java. We have proven we know that it is better to transition efficiently than to iterate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our synergistic models but our ability to visualize. The capability to incentivize interactively leads to the aptitude to seize micro-proactively. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PHP. Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for coping with emerging partnerships? The paradigms factor is turn-key. What does it really mean to whiteboard "mega-super-virtually"? Gurustu practically invented the term "performance". Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Perl. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for metrics? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to disintermediate proactively. A company that can iterate courageously will (someday) be able to generate elegantly. The capability to reintermediate intra-seamlessly leads to the power to unleash intuitively. We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Flash. What does the term "content" really mean? A company that can whiteboard correctly will (someday) be able to drive correctly. It may seem remarkable, but it's 100 percent 100 percent accurate! The social networks factor is affiliate-based. We think we know that if you actualize interactively then you may also disintermediate intuitively. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to maximize dynamically. A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to strategize correctly. We often disintermediate distributed, C2C2C Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Think frictionless. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. What does the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? Think web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be ubiquitous? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our reporting but our capability to integrate. If you unleash virtually, you may have to harness interactively. Without preplanned networks, applications are forced to become user-defined, end-to-end.