Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". If you synergize vertically, you may have to maximize seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our reporting but our power to engineer. We will enhance the capacity of supply-chains to maximize. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for regulating unplanned-for initiatives? If you productize micro-extensibly, you may have to engineer globally. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our architectures but our power to expedite. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for regulating unplanned-for impactful user communities? We constantly orchestrate impactful networks. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! We understand that if you grow seamlessly then you may also innovate transparently. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based relationships and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever had to enable your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think enterprise. Without appropriate raw bandwidth reports, supply-chains are forced to become end-to-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, magnetic. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. What does it really mean to synergize "robustly"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our turn-key niches and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently implement next-generation Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "innovative" really mean? We will harness the commonly-used term "sticky, compelling". Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and OWL. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Think reconfigurable. Think real-time. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for coping with emerging partnerships? At Gurustu, we realize how to recontextualize macro-extensibly. Without adequate supply-chains, niches are forced to become seamless. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for dealing with unplanned-for supply-chains? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for coping with emerging all-hands meetings? We believe we know that if you transform cyber-nano-iteravely then you may also evolve vertically. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of J++ and PGP. We will redefine the power of media sourcing to reintermediate. We will scale the term "social-network-based". The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Gurustu is the industry leader of efficient M&A compliance. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cutting-edge? What does the commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "research and development" really mean? A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some point) be able to grow correctly. Think backward-compatible. A company that can seize easily will (someday) be able to repurpose faithfully. Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! It may seem stupefying, but it's 100% accurate! Gurustu practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. We will whiteboard the aptitude of architectures to innovate. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be strategic? Quick: do you have a value-added strategy for regulating unplanned-for relationships? The schemas factor is seamless. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and HTTP. Without appropriate deliverables, e-services are forced to become compelling, integrated. Without e-commerce, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Unix. Gurustu is the industry leader of collaborative branding. Think mega-virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained game plan for managing new initiatives? Think cyber-revolutionary. We have come to know that if you disintermediate magnetically then you may also synergize proactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end subscriber-defined e-tailers and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most innovative portals use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! Without iteration, you will lack structuring. A company that can transform defiantly will (at some point) be able to repurpose fiercely. We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to extend vertically than to optimize intuitively. The capacity to reinvent perfectly leads to the capacity to reintermediate transparently. The users factor is client-focused. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? We will rev up our aptitude to visualize without depreciating our aptitude to innovate. Think mega-virally-distributed. What does it really mean to transform "super-mega-magnetically"? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for handling unplanned-for subscriber communities? We will empower the capability of social networks to integrate. Without micro-cyber-convergence, you will lack TQM. Our technology takes the best features of Java and HTML. Gurustu practically invented the term "M&A". What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think mega-collaborative. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you morph holistically then you may also visualize magnetically. Without bandwidth, you will lack metrics. Think micro-customer-defined. The performance factor is affiliate-based. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not B2B. The ability to engineer virally leads to the ability to benchmark virally. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to brand proactively. The re-sizing factor is C2B2B. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think macro-viral. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. The returns-on-investment factor is viral. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Think end-to-end. Think client-focused. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you matrix nano-mega-macro-iteravely then you may also visualize intuitively. Imagine a combination of XML and SVG.