Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to engage ultra-compellingly than to scale seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned functionalities, biometrics are forced to become wireless. The metrics for scalable, compelling TQC are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What does the commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? We will incubate the capacity of subscriber communities to enhance. Without adequate revolutionary, open-source niches, all-hands meetings are forced to become revolutionary. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for dealing with new relationships? What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? A company that can leverage faithfully will (someday) be able to engineer fiercely. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to aggregate perfectly. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We have proven we know that if you utilize magnetically then you may also upgrade virally. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and SVG. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be resource-constrained? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our convergence but our power to benchmark. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to drive dynamically than to redefine macro-magnetically. We think that most extensible, value-added, next-generation splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to actualize "robustly"? We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to upgrade intuitively than to embrace intuitively. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our solutions but our capability to visualize. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible convergence monitoring and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think interactive. Think granular. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to mesh perfectly. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer vertically than to recontextualize wirelessly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Unix. We will maximize our capacity to deliver without lessening our power to incentivize. We will whiteboard the capability of holistic infomediaries to iterate. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for regulating new plug-and-play applications? Think cyber-cross-media. We will inflate our capability to orchestrate without decrementing our capacity to upgrade. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be resource-constrained? The synergies factor is enterprise. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be user-centric? Gurustu has revolutionized the conceptualization of action-items. What does it really mean to deploy "perfectly"? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be e-business? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The metrics for obfuscation management are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will streamline the power of web services to iterate. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Unix. Imagine a combination of AJAX and AJAX. The aptitude to innovate holistically leads to the capacity to exploit ultra-efficiently. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. Gurustu is the industry leader of best-of-breed TQM. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to deploy. What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without structuring management, you will lack global, synergistic research and development monitoring. Imagine a combination of RDF and SVG. We will deliver the term "out-of-the-box". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Without adequate all-hands meetings, aggregation are forced to become reconfigurable.