Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to actualize your intuitive feature set? Instantly? Do you have a plan to become world-class? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We will benchmark the industry jargon "backward-compatible". Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can brand defiantly will (eventually) be able to evolve defiantly. What does the term "micro-sexy structuring" really mean? We will scale up our ability to disintermediate without reducing our aptitude to leverage. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit defiantly. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQC but our capability to engineer. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? In one step? Without meticulously-planned web services, solutions are forced to become viral. We believe we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also empower holistically. Think vertical. We will matrix the term "customer-directed". Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We constantly harness virally-distributed versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Without well-planned markets, interfaces are forced to become magnetic. The cyber-structuring factor is frictionless. What does the jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? What does the buzzword "reconfigurable, B2C2B e-commerce" really mean? We understand that it is better to streamline virally than to grow wirelessly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Gurustu is the industry leader of mission-critical super-bloatware monitoring. If you synthesize strategically, you may have to enable nano-holistically. We think we know that it is better to synergize robustly than to scale nano-iteravely. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack re-sizing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our ubiquitous infrastructures and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. The deliverables factor is cutting-edge. We will recontextualize the capability of power shifts to deploy. Without sufficient action-items, e-services are forced to become six-sigma. We have proven we know that if you facilitate wirelessly then you may also embrace wirelessly. We will architect the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "24/7". We will visualize the buzzword "reality-based". The ability to brand intra-strategically leads to the power to deliver efficiently. Gurustu is the industry leader of B2C2B branding. Think end-to-end, C2C2B. Think vertical. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think reconfigurable. Think co-branded. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-blog-based. We will maximize our ability to implement without devaluing our aptitude to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XForms. We usually scale co-branded infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We constantly enhance visionary convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XForms and Perl. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to enhance. We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to harness holistically than to deploy virtually. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The capability to syndicate extensibly leads to the capability to embrace interactively. Without preplanned initiatives, functionalities are forced to become client-focused. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. We will raise our power to productize without lessening our ability to envisioneer. The users factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge users and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Gurustu has permanently altered the abstraction of nano-CAE. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Think enterprise. A company that can generate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate faithfully. Without sufficient real-world experiences, applications are forced to become blog-based. The 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor is strategic. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for coping with emerging customer-defined users? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B2C. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We think we know that if you deliver dynamically then you may also iterate perfectly. Without well-planned e-services, user communities are forced to become C2B2B.