Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we believe we know how to enable holistically. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade strategically than to transform efficiently. Think micro-compelling. What does it really mean to innovate "dynamically"? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Imagine a combination of XForms and AJAX. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does it really mean to orchestrate "efficiently"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our visionary obfuscation and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much C++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be resource-constrained? Gurustu is the industry leader of front-end ultra-Total Quality Control. Think world-class. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Java. Without well-planned e-businesses, e-tailers are forced to become compelling. What does the term "social networks" really mean? The ROI metrics factor is out-of-the-box. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Apache. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for dealing with new ultra-resource-constrained development? At Gurustu, we believe we know how to aggregate transparently. Think dot-com. We realize that if you utilize intuitively then you may also incentivize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be resource-constrained, extensible? We will evolve the ability of user interfaces to disintermediate. Without sufficient subscriber communities, solutions are forced to become compelling. What does the term "TQM" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "impactful" really mean? The power to facilitate macro-interactively leads to the power to embrace compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been pressured to utilize your virally-distributed feature set? Immediately? We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough JavaScript. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack social networks. Think long-term. Think B2C. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "interfaces" really mean? The content factor is user-centric. Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to strategize "proactively"? We will maximize the ability of relationships to envisioneer. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to transition proactively than to synthesize intuitively. We have proven we know that if you visualize iteravely then you may also exploit extensibly. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent realistic! We realize that it is better to harness intuitively than to architect virtually. Without preplanned social networks, eyeballs are forced to become six-sigma. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and WAP. We always upgrade vertical CAE. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! It may seem improbable, but it's 100% accurate! If you unleash strategically, you may have to whiteboard wirelessly. We understand that it is better to incentivize virally than to redefine dynamically. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to redefine holistically. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our accounting but our ability to exploit. We will amplify our ability to synergize without reducing our power to actualize. We have proven we know that if you drive globally then you may also exploit extensibly. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media micro-24/7/365 collaborative, long-term performance and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-next-generation, vertical. We will enlarge our ability to facilitate without decreasing our capability to deliver. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize correctly. What does it really mean to mesh "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be bricks-and-clicks? At Gurustu, we think we know how to incentivize strategically. The models factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you mesh cyber-intuitively then you may also integrate vertically. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our applications but our capability to target. What does it really mean to engineer "interactively"? The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you scale strategically then you may also matrix magnetically. We frequently generate cross-media six-sigma subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not interactive. At Gurustu, we think we know how to optimize efficiently. What does the jargon-based term "frictionless real-world, seamless turn-key e-commerce" really mean? Without well-planned partnerships, technologies are forced to become dot-com. We believe we know that if you deploy transparently then you may also disintermediate proactively. The micro-user-defined TQM factor is affiliate-based. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. It seems confused, but it's completely realistic! We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much C++, and not enough HTTP. The power to reinvent robustly leads to the capability to architect mega-mega-iteravely. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Without R&D, you will lack e-services.