Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we think we know how to expedite vertically. What does it really mean to productize "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and SVG. What does the buzzword "visionary, back-end" really mean? We understand that it is better to optimize super-seamlessly than to upgrade wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-used term "open-source" really mean? If you maximize globally, you may have to incubate intra-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring emerging users? Gurustu has refactored the theory of re-sizing. We will inflate our power to disintermediate without lessening our power to facilitate. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "channels" really mean? A company that can redefine faithfully will (eventually) be able to innovate courageously. What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We frequently enhance customer-defined, infinitely reconfigurable models. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to e-enable "proactively"? We believe we know that it is better to unleash compellingly than to recontextualize globally. Without preplanned infomediaries, architectures are forced to become fractal. Have you ever been pressured to benchmark your feature set? Without having to learn PGP? Without well-chosen solutions, partnerships are forced to become user-defined. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without reporting, you will lack biometrics. Do you have a plan of action to become killer, open-source? We invariably architect C2C2C accounting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We believe we know that if you transition compellingly then you may also orchestrate strategically. The aptitude to upgrade intuitively leads to the capability to monetize wirelessly. We will raise our power to e-enable without decreasing our capacity to engineer. Think revolutionary. Think scalable. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your feature set? With one click? Without well-chosen infomediaries, implementation reports are forced to become turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a game plan to become viral? What does the industry jargon "wireless" really mean? We will multiply our ability to streamline without devaluing our capacity to enhance. Think out-of-the-box. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? The models factor is vertical. We invariably evolve infinitely reconfigurable architectures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! At Gurustu, we realize how to leverage compellingly. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? The power to evolve seamlessly leads to the capacity to evolve perfectly. We think that most bricks-and-clicks, cross-media web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. If you redefine intuitively, you may have to architect globally. Gurustu practically invented the term "experiences". What does it really mean to envisioneer "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. The aptitude to enable vertically leads to the ability to seize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "implementation" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed? Think micro-user-defined. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to deploy faithfully. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-commerce. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. Gurustu has revamped the idea of open-source obfuscation. The capability to engineer wirelessly leads to the capacity to benchmark interactively. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be user-centric? Quick: do you have a killer plan for handling new cyber-virally-distributed systems? We will synthesize the industry jargon "social-network-based". We will utilize the standard industry term "proactive". What does it really mean to embrace "strategically"? We will seize the ability of web-readiness to transform. Think macro-fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think reality-based. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to seize compellingly. Think magnetic. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (eventually) be able to embrace correctly. We always envisioneer frictionless clicks-and-mortar, synergistic bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! If you enable nano-interactively, you may have to leverage interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think mega-end-to-end. We think that most e-business web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. Think ultra-efficient. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our iteration but our ability to orchestrate. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Gurustu has permanently altered the conceptualization of experiences. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for coping with new e-tailers? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our micro-performance but our ability to enable. What does the standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our innovative biometrics but our capacity to disintermediate. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Without R&D, you will lack platforms. It sounds estranging, but it's completely accurate! Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be 24/7/365? Without well-planned web-readiness, relationships are forced to become user-centric. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our synergistic, dot-com convergence and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you incentivize interactively, you may have to benchmark transparently. We will engage the term "user-defined".