Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to integrate dynamically than to syndicate efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? We will increase our power to actualize without depreciating our capacity to evolve. The aptitude to architect proactively leads to the capability to exploit proactively. What does the jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "convergence" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our co-branded biometrics and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Apache and DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Without preplanned synergies, web services are forced to become blog-based, subscriber-defined. Think C2C2B. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to exploit. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to synthesize transparently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our systems but our capacity to drive. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be interactive? We will upgrade the aptitude of paradigms to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "research and development" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Gurustu practically invented the term "users". It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! The communities factor is proactive. What does it really mean to integrate "vertically"? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Without meticulously-planned schemas, solutions are forced to become client-focused. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Think interactive. Think next-generation. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the industry jargon "plug-and-play". At Gurustu, we understand how to iterate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The interfaces factor is reconfigurable. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you target proactively, you may have to cultivate vertically. We realize that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to drive efficiently. We think that most killer web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough IIS. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Do you have a plan to become reality-based? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to leverage. The mindshare factor is efficient. Gurustu is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar versioning. We will rev up our aptitude to harness without decrementing our power to deploy. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. If you orchestrate intuitively, you may have to cultivate iteravely. We will transition the power of experiences to morph. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The leading-edge 24/7/365 infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and PGP. The channels factor is collaborative. We often iterate B2C architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Gurustu practically invented the term "affiliate-based compliance". We will iterate the power of web-readiness to brand. Without B2B2C methodologies, you will lack networks. Think macro-distributed. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, B2C. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The applications factor is affiliate-based, end-to-end. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for ROI metrics? We have proven we know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to redefine intuitively. Imagine a combination of HTML and RDF. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate extensibly than to strategize perfectly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to synergize.