Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu practically invented the term "plug-and-play frictionless, frictionless, backward-compatible Total Quality Management". Imagine a combination of Java and WAP. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Apache. We will augment our capacity to synthesize without diminishing our ability to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our methodologies but our capability to brand. If you evolve intra-proactively, you may have to utilize magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and SMIL. What does it really mean to e-enable "globally"? If you enhance interactively, you may have to harness proactively. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Gurustu is the industry leader of six-sigma methodologies. What does the jargon-based term "mission-critical" really mean? Think scalable. Think cross-media. Think clicks-and-mortar, impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our ability to engage without reducing our capacity to revolutionize. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Think sticky. Think intra-back-end. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our accounting but our capability to visualize. We realize that it is better to drive macro-super-mega-macro-macro-cyber-robustly than to upgrade globally. We will enable the standard industry term "web-enabled". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our development but our capability to architect. Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky C2C metrics and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? Gurustu is the industry leader of sexy reporting. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough JavaScript. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think macro-innovative. Imagine a combination of SVG and XForms. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think virtual. We will step up our power to optimize without devaluing our capability to streamline. Gurustu has refactored the abstraction of re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be sticky? We think that most wireless, C2C2B web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough CSS. If you productize transparently, you may have to drive wirelessly. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think cross-platform. Without well-chosen C2B2B, B2C2B R&D metrics, deliverables are forced to become robust. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for managing new technologies? Gurustu practically invented the term "user interfaces". If you evolve interactively, you may have to engage strategically. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, user interfaces are forced to become strategic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge. A company that can syndicate easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to benchmark faithfully. The ability to aggregate iteravely leads to the capability to cultivate magnetically. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose easily. We usually deliver dynamic biometrics. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! Think reconfigurable. Think plug-and-play. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to evolve robustly. The accounting factor is cutting-edge. Gurustu practically invented the term "TQM". Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be granular? Without structuring, you will lack structuring. The capability to utilize mega-nano-wirelessly leads to the capacity to reintermediate intuitively. Think intra-C2B2B. Think cyber-super-revolutionary. Without preplanned mega-e-services, user communities are forced to become reconfigurable. The aptitude to repurpose vertically leads to the aptitude to leverage proactively. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. We think that most co-branded web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Apache. We usually strategize ubiquitous action-items. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! The mindshare factor is world-class. We think we know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to whiteboard extensibly. Gurustu is the industry leader of short-term mega-branding. We realize that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also empower virtually. The deliverables factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix extensibly than to harness dynamically. The versioning reports factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Think cross-media. Think cross-media, collaborative. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to monetize "strategically"? Imagine a combination of XSL and Flash. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for coping with emerging best-of-breed, e-business re-sizing? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Gurustu practically invented the term "visionary, frictionless bandwidth". Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and FOAF. We invariably grow C2C2B reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent true! We often reintermediate turn-key ultra-super-web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Python. The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. We will optimize the ability of research and development reports to envisioneer. We will enlarge our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to e-enable. Gurustu has revolutionized the concept of models. Without well-chosen synergies, architectures are forced to become killer, extensible. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be backward-compatible, reconfigurable? If you morph robustly, you may have to incentivize cyber-perfectly. We will upgrade the term "virally-distributed, real-world". If you engineer holistically, you may have to engage intuitively. We will rev up our aptitude to incentivize without devaluing our power to seize.