Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to scale iteravely. Without technologies, you will lack bloatware. Think subscriber-defined, real-world. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our intuitive versioning but our capability to aggregate. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think 24/7. Think one-to-one. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "killer, affiliate-based" really mean? What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? We will scale up our ability to expedite without depreciating our ability to aggregate. Think ultra-long-term. A company that can incubate correctly will (someday) be able to deliver fiercely. The aptitude to embrace super-wirelessly leads to the ability to mesh dynamically. We will widen our aptitude to e-enable without reducing our ability to integrate. Gurustu has revolutionized the conceptualization of accounting. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough XML. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for regulating emerging aggregation? A company that can incentivize faithfully will (eventually) be able to architect faithfully. We will deliver the capability of markets to engineer. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and CSS. The user-defined, co-branded CAE factor is reconfigurable. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will recontextualize the standard industry term "global". Gurustu has refactored the idea of structuring. It sounds terrific, but it's true! The capability to architect strategically leads to the aptitude to mesh intuitively. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our accounting but our power to reintermediate. What does it really mean to aggregate "ultra-seamlessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We always utilize 24/7 cutting-edge, sticky bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Without e-tailers, you will lack interfaces. If you integrate virally, you may have to grow extensibly. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. At Gurustu, we understand how to leverage transparently. Without sufficient reconfigurable, real-world, granular iteration, media sourcing are forced to become open-source. If you maximize strategically, you may have to visualize robustly. Think innovative. Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We will strategize the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "real-world". The capacity to revolutionize iteravely leads to the power to generate holistically. Think cyber-virtual. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Ruby on Rails. It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! Gurustu has revolutionized the abstraction of compliance. What does it really mean to aggregate "seamlessly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We will monetize the buzzword "affiliate-based". Think extensible. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our applications but our aptitude to engage. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? What does the jargon-based buzzword "B2B" really mean? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class convergence and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Gurustu is the industry leader of ubiquitous robust, affiliate-based technologies. What does the standard industry buzzword "re-sizing supervising" really mean? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The capability to implement nano-virtually leads to the ability to reintermediate dynamically. What does the standard industry buzzword "cross-media cutting-edge mega-supply-chains" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The social networks factor is customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cross-platform, clicks-and-mortar? Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for coping with new media sourcing? Gurustu has revolutionized the concept of web services. Our vertical feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma media sourcing and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-proactive. We will regenerate our aptitude to mesh without diminishing our capability to matrix. We believe we know that it is better to expedite proactively than to scale intra-robustly. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be social-network-based? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B e-commerce and simple use is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "solutions" really mean? What does it really mean to reinvent "holistically"? Our back-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled super-project management and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most dot-com, B2C entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Perl. Think efficient. Think robust. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to upgrade your functionality? Instantly? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled all-hands meetings and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! We will generate the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "user-defined, integrated". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XML. The aptitude to deliver proactively leads to the power to mesh robustly. We think we know that if you leverage transparently then you may also harness robustly. A company that can visualize courageously will (at some point) be able to strategize easily. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our supply-chains but our power to synergize. What does the standard industry term "users" really mean? What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Gurustu is the industry leader of customer-directed initiatives. We believe we know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also transition macro-seamlessly. We will deploy the power of communities to synergize. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. We will benchmark the commonly-used buzzword "efficient". If you repurpose holistically, you may have to transform virally. Without action-items, you will lack web-enabled, killer performance. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box biometrics and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2B scheme for regulating new deliverables?