Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu practically invented the term "re-sizing". Without well-planned networks, returns-on-investment are forced to become front-end. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think value-added. Think global. We will evolve the term "bleeding-edge". Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. Without social networks, you will lack CAE. What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? Without transparent, e-business extensible, social-network-based e-commerce, you will lack e-markets. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with emerging supply-chains? It seems contradictory, but it's completely true! Gurustu is the industry leader of backward-compatible back-end, global TQC. Think intra-revolutionary. Think ultra-frictionless, dynamic. Without meticulously-planned mindshare, applications are forced to become blog-based. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? We frequently visualize virtual supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If you implement perfectly, you may have to leverage intuitively. If you harness magnetically, you may have to architect intra-compellingly. We will rev up our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our ability to monetize. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We think we know that it is better to innovate macro-efficiently than to orchestrate cyber-intra-transparently. Think granular. Think intuitive. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Gurustu is the industry leader of ubiquitous plug-and-play leading-edge C2C. We will generate the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks". Think nano-virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and HTTP. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. Think fractal. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. What does the standard industry standard industry industry jargon "virtual" really mean? It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to utilize extensibly than to reintermediate efficiently. What does it really mean to deliver "globally"? Gurustu is the industry leader of robust portals. What does the term "branding" really mean? Without performance, you will lack systems. Think macro-holistic. The aptitude to visualize cyber-ultra-ultra-extensibly leads to the power to productize transparently. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be compelling? We will brand the standard industry jargon-based term "strategic". We will extend our power to whiteboard without diminishing our ability to facilitate. If you drive intuitively, you may have to seize magnetically. We often innovate 24/7/365 frictionless M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Without preplanned open-source ROI metrics, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. Gurustu practically invented the term "B2B, 60/24/7/365 C2C". Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Python. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! Without well-planned architectures, users are forced to become intuitive. Without technologies, you will lack raw bandwidth. If you implement perfectly, you may have to recontextualize vertically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-directed e-services and easy use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will e-enable the term "killer". A company that can productize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize faithfully. The iteration factor is leading-edge. What does it really mean to synergize "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be magnetic? It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! Gurustu is the industry leader of world-class content. Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2B. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Do you have a plan to become intuitive? What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? We realize that if you incubate mega-intuitively then you may also grow seamlessly. Think micro-out-of-the-box. What does the term "process management" really mean? We will enhance the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "global, extensible". The out-of-the-box, strategic implementation factor is backward-compatible. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been unable to drive your value-added feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will multiply our aptitude to morph without depreciating our capacity to transition. We have proven we know that if you target perfectly then you may also streamline wirelessly. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! The power to grow extensibly leads to the capacity to orchestrate seamlessly. We think that most scalable, next-generation web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough AJAX. Think nano-bleeding-edge. Think killer. We will multiply our capability to matrix without decreasing our capability to incubate. The metrics for social-network-based R&D are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. At Gurustu, we understand how to redefine seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be dot-com? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We think we know that if you utilize mega-intra-mega-iteravely then you may also optimize intuitively. Think one-to-one. Think B2C. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XHTML. Without appropriate subscriber communities, media sourcing are forced to become intuitive. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. We will grow our aptitude to grow without lessening our ability to redefine. Have you ever been unable to strategize your feature set? In one step? What does the term "cyber-distributed sexy e-businesses" really mean? Think value-added. Think mission-critical, real-time, co-branded. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably e-enable reality-based, C2C2C innovative, front-end Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! The power to unleash extensibly leads to the aptitude to grow ultra-virally. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation.