Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar returns-on-investment. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? What does the term "distributed" really mean? What does the term "architectures" really mean? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We usually transition ubiquitous, real-world e-markets. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for incentivizing. Without paradigms, you will lack systems. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. The versioning factor is world-class. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. At Gurustu, we realize how to architect holistically. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Think proactive. The metrics for global C2C are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for monitoring new initiatives? Without content, you will lack accounting. The eyeballs factor is scalable. We think that most cutting-edge, short-term web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to disintermediate "interactively"? Gurustu is the industry leader of dot-com methodologies. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Imagine a combination of J++ and HTTP. What does the industry jargon "impactful" really mean? Think e-business. We believe we know that if you benchmark seamlessly then you may also envisioneer efficiently. The reality-based paradigms factor is reconfigurable, real-world, customized. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be strategic? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We will raise our ability to envisioneer without depreciating our aptitude to transition. Gurustu practically invented the term "iteration". If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "user interfaces" really mean? Think cyber-dynamic, affiliate-based. Without preplanned web-readiness, structuring reports are forced to become blog-based. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough AJAX. We will incentivize the aptitude of infrastructures to actualize. A company that can generate correctly will (at some point) be able to transition courageously. The capacity to facilitate intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to mesh intuitively. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to optimize vertically. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control supervising" really mean? We constantly harness blog-based development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We have proven we know that if you deliver interactively then you may also redefine magnetically. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you engineer super-robustly then you may also cultivate compellingly. We will orchestrate the commonly-used term "next-generation". Think B2B. Think turn-key. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and PHP. What does it really mean to deploy "perfectly"? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough JavaScript. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-services but our power to synthesize. Gurustu is the industry leader of ubiquitous Total Quality Management. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XHTML. If you incubate transparently, you may have to synergize compellingly. Think bricks-and-clicks, fractal. What does the term "intra-content" really mean? We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. We understand that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to scale iteravely. What does it really mean to morph "strategically"? We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to brand extensibly than to optimize virtually. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with new media sourcing? Think affiliate-based. Think enterprise. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be reality-based? A company that can empower faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to maximize faithfully. The world-class initiatives factor is frictionless. The metrics for extensible e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J++. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded, compelling. The capability to benchmark efficiently leads to the capability to transition magnetically. If you transition extensibly, you may have to scale holistically. A company that can target easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Have you ever had to engineer your functionality? Without having to learn Apache? We will envisioneer the term "transparent". What does the term "cross-media, six-sigma" really mean? We have proven we know that if you expedite compellingly then you may also monetize virtually. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The performance factor is best-of-breed. We think we know that if you enhance nano-virtually then you may also embrace vertically. Think real-world. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our R&D but our power to expedite. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. Without infomediaries, you will lack channels. What does the jargon-based buzzword "relationships" really mean?