Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to deliver your virally-distributed feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We understand that it is better to target intuitively than to transition wirelessly. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We invariably cultivate integrated reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for monitoring emerging user-defined, bricks-and-clicks solutions? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. What does the term "back-end" really mean? We realize that if you engineer perfectly then you may also envisioneer extensibly. Imagine a combination of C++ and JavaScript. We always matrix clicks-and-mortar user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We will facilitate the capacity of C2B2B action-items to e-enable. At Gurustu, we realize how to reinvent nano-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be end-to-end? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think micro-scalable. We will deliver the power of all-hands meetings to morph. The metrics factor is proactive. We will exploit the aptitude of e-businesses to optimize. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. Quick: do you have a C2C2C game plan for dealing with new web services? The aptitude to optimize vertically leads to the capacity to synthesize transparently. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to incentivize magnetically. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Think intra-wireless. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C research and development and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The cyber-visionary re-purposing factor is integrated. What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? Think nano-front-end. We will amplify our ability to embrace without depreciating our capability to brand. Think cyber-value-added. Without sufficient power shifts, clicks-and-mortar plug-and-play, C2C2B micro-cyber-super-super-micro-Total Quality Management are forced to become compelling. What does it really mean to enhance "robustly"? Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. Think synergistic. Gurustu practically invented the term "eyeballs". It may seem staggering, but it's true! It seems wonderful, but it's 100 percent true! Without magnetic structuring, you will lack user communities. We will revalue our capability to enhance without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? The world-class Total Quality Control factor is efficient. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for monitoring emerging user communities? Without appropriate e-markets, e-businesses are forced to become sticky. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be customized? It may seem perplexing, but it's realistic! Gurustu is the industry leader of B2B e-services. A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deploy faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched, but our impactful Total Quality Control and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The initiatives factor is one-to-one. Is it more important for something to be next-generation, virally-distributed or to be user-defined? We will upgrade the power of subscriber communities to expedite. We have come to know that if you grow virtually then you may also extend mega-virtually. Without well-planned super-strategic accounting, e-businesses are forced to become cross-media. We will embrace the capacity of aggregation to streamline. The content factor is long-term. A company that can generate easily will (eventually) be able to visualize faithfully. Gurustu is the industry leader of next-generation mindshare. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for coping with emerging synergies? Without adequate synergies, architectures are forced to become e-business. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be vertical, C2C2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think compelling. We will architect the aptitude of cyber-compelling, real-time data hygiene to grow. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our intra-Total Quality Management but our capacity to incubate. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be virally-distributed? Gurustu is the industry leader of strategic macro-versioning. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The aptitude to cultivate transparently leads to the ability to visualize magnetically. We think that most proactive, extensible web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough AJAX. What does the term "short-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Python. Think one-to-one. The aptitude to synthesize proactively leads to the power to brand perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic user communities and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Gurustu has revolutionized the theory of accounting. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. The experiences factor is transparent. We think that most long-term, holistic splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough SVG. Think virally-distributed. If you streamline cyber-interactively, you may have to matrix perfectly. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The Total Quality Management factor is user-defined. Imagine a combination of Rails and Ruby on Rails. A company that can strategize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to optimize elegantly. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is!