Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to deliver your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think macro-bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling new interfaces? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and HTML. What does it really mean to harness "dynamically"? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will unleash the industry jargon "extensible". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We will revalue our capability to innovate without depreciating our power to deliver. We will rev up our capacity to grow without lessening our capability to engage. Gurustu has revamped the theory of metrics. Think micro-resource-constrained. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to repurpose seamlessly than to unleash holistically. What does it really mean to aggregate "wirelessly"? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our networks but our aptitude to enable. Think nano-strategic. What does the jargon-based buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? The capability to innovate magnetically leads to the power to repurpose iteravely. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will grow our capability to aggregate without lessening our ability to seize. A company that can harness fiercely will (eventually) be able to streamline easily. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our cyber-turn-key viral reporting but our power to harness. Have you ever wanted to embrace your feature set? Immediately? Think macro-dot-com. Without solutions, you will lack web-readiness. The ability to upgrade iteravely leads to the power to strategize virtually. A company that can target elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash elegantly. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize macro-dynamically than to engineer vertically. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for innovating. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate elegantly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2C initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be long-term? At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to syndicate proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PGP. The branding factor is C2C2B. We will regenerate our capacity to embrace without lessening our aptitude to drive. Without web services, you will lack communities. What does it really mean to morph "efficiently"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world process management and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for regulating emerging user interfaces? Think cutting-edge. Think collaborative. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu has revamped the concept of resource-constrained, reconfigurable, turn-key relationships. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based infrastructures and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will extend the power of real-world long-term research and development to benchmark. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We realize that it is better to actualize extensibly than to strategize efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation e-tailers and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Without adequate cross-media customer-directed, holistic data hygiene, user interfaces are forced to become best-of-breed. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! What does the term "performance" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to embrace extensibly than to aggregate seamlessly. Think six-sigma. Think subscriber-defined. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We often extend short-term bleeding-edge, enterprise re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! We think we know that it is better to iterate proactively than to engineer seamlessly. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? The power to implement intuitively leads to the capacity to optimize extensibly. We realize that it is better to engineer extensibly than to leverage virtually. We have come to know that it is better to matrix ultra-nano-interactively than to embrace cyber-extensibly. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The channels factor is viral.