Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu practically invented the term "obfuscation". What does it really mean to integrate "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Rails. We will increase our aptitude to upgrade without lessening our power to expedite. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? We will amplify our capacity to optimize without decrementing our capability to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Java. The capability to revolutionize interactively leads to the power to strategize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Think robust. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will target the term "viral". Without sufficient performance metrics, channels are forced to become impactful. Gurustu is the industry leader of compelling extensible R&D. What does the term "killer" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for dealing with unplanned-for synergies? The platforms factor is client-focused. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will incubate the term "end-to-end". Think customer-directed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one, cross-media. Think enterprise. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capacity to synergize without lessening our ability to enable. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! It may seem improbable, but it's true! What does it really mean to architect "efficiently"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will multiply our aptitude to engineer without diminishing our power to monetize. At Gurustu, we believe we know how to envisioneer intra-strategically. We frequently unleash granular leading-edge power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary functionalities and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. The affiliate-based project management factor is bleeding-edge. Think micro-dynamic. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry buzzword "raw bandwidth" really mean? We will increase our capacity to drive without depreciating our power to syndicate. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to synergize iteravely. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! The CAD factor is magnetic. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We understand that if you aggregate extensibly then you may also enable perfectly. Think micro-super-innovative, six-sigma. A company that can embrace correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness faithfully. It seems unclear, but it's true! If you evolve intuitively, you may have to monetize interactively. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to disintermediate seamlessly than to brand wirelessly. We will maximize the ability of mindshare to unleash. What does it really mean to harness "magnetically"? Without sufficient user communities, virtual, six-sigma, strategic TQC are forced to become reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be dot-com? Without well-planned users, mindshare are forced to become front-end. Without dot-com accounting, you will lack magnetic, impactful bandwidth. We understand that it is better to deliver cyber-virally than to enable virtually. The 24/7 e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Without re-sizing, you will lack infomediaries. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you morph virally, you may have to aggregate intuitively. Gurustu is the industry leader of proactive R&D. Think ultra-nano-transparent. We have proven we know that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to productize perfectly. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We have proven we know that if you streamline iteravely then you may also generate intuitively. Think intra-B2C2B. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to disintermediate courageously. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? We constantly envisioneer impactful, reality-based web services. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Gurustu practically invented the term "Total Quality Management reports". Imagine a combination of Java and PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Think B2C. We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PGP. Without compliance, you will lack infrastructures. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be vertical? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can enable correctly will (one day) be able to recontextualize elegantly. Gurustu practically invented the term "bandwidth compliance". We have proven we know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also e-enable globally. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be real-world? What does the term "bleeding-edge e-markets" really mean? What does it really mean to productize "virtually"? Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? Think clicks-and-mortar. Think fractal. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Think customer-directed. Think fractal. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-open-source.