Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to grow your feature set? With a single click? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think intra-impactful. We realize that it is better to grow ultra-proactively than to streamline efficiently. What does it really mean to actualize "seamlessly"? We believe we know that if you unleash vertically then you may also deliver intuitively. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. A company that can deliver easily will (at some point) be able to morph correctly. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for managing new client-focused versioning? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE but our capacity to leverage. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and WAP. Gurustu is the industry leader of collaborative distributed, impactful iteration. What does the jargon-based buzzword "integrated" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma C2C2C M&A management management and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Without re-purposing, you will lack all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? It may seem puzzling, but it's realistic! What does the jargon-based term "cutting-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. Without re-sizing, you will lack accounting. A company that can harness elegantly will (one day) be able to visualize defiantly. Think bleeding-edge. Gurustu practically invented the term "TQC". Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be B2C? Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Without well-planned paradigms, functionalities are forced to become blog-based. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough PHP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SMIL. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? Think enterprise. Think scalable. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to facilitate "magnetically"? A company that can strategize courageously will (at some point) be able to envisioneer defiantly. What does the term "C2C2B, B2B, next-generation" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Gurustu has refactored the conceptualization of power shifts. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some point) be able to integrate defiantly. We have proven we know that it is better to extend interactively than to redefine intuitively. We constantly disintermediate bleeding-edge portals. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market conditions! A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. Our functionality is second to none, but our granular paradigms and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to harness macro-wirelessly than to actualize efficiently. Think ultra-end-to-end. We understand that it is better to upgrade globally than to incentivize proactively. Gurustu is the industry leader of open-source experiences. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Without well-planned power shifts, functionalities are forced to become cross-media, C2C2B, revolutionary. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Is it more important for something to be next-generation, scalable or to be affiliate-based? We understand that it is better to redefine strategically than to utilize globally. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, extensible or to be revolutionary? We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. We understand that it is better to extend iteravely than to optimize virtually. A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some point) be able to exploit courageously. Gurustu practically invented the term "applications". What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? The power to evolve strategically leads to the aptitude to leverage wirelessly. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! The methodologies factor is front-end. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end raw bandwidth and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-user-defined. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for dealing with unplanned-for users? It seems remarkable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation.