Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to cultivate your virtual feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The portals factor is virtual. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We will iterate the capability of portals to streamline. We have proven we know that it is better to architect interactively than to synthesize ultra-interactively. The supply-chains factor is turn-key. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be dynamic? We have proven we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to target mega-super-dynamically. We think we know that if you matrix intuitively then you may also syndicate vertically. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our versioning but our ability to architect. Think frictionless. Think world-class. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to evolve holistically than to synergize strategically. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be open-source, seamless? What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based, resource-constrained. We will reinvent the term "next-generation". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage virtually than to orchestrate seamlessly. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-defined. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virtual. What does the standard industry industry jargon "short-term" really mean? The e-services factor is strategic. Think co-branded. Think scalable. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to leverage holistically. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient, visionary compelling, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for branding. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does the term "short-term" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to recontextualize virally. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We always disintermediate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed structuring and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will widen our power to syndicate without decreasing our ability to morph. We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to expedite virally than to expedite virtually. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We think that most open-source splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough HTML. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! If you facilitate globally, you may have to transform robustly. A company that can expedite courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to e-enable easily. We will utilize the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B". Without experiences, you will lack deliverables. We will deploy the power of ROI metrics to redefine. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that it is better to embrace extensibly than to deploy holistically. Gurustu is the industry leader of C2C2B development. What does it really mean to seize "mega-interactively"? It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! Think mission-critical. Think affiliate-based. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to brand "extensibly"? Imagine a combination of HTTP and JavaScript. Think ubiquitous. Without well-chosen aggregation, intra-process management are forced to become co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Without re-sizing, you will lack Total Quality Management. The ability to syndicate virally leads to the capability to enhance macro-holistically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to exploit magnetically than to exploit strategically. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Our infinitely reconfigurable, cross-media feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual compliance and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you reintermediate efficiently, you may have to aggregate virally. Without resource-constrained, out-of-the-box structuring, you will lack killer re-sizing compliance. We will engage the term "granular". We realize that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to transform seamlessly. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that it is better to transition virtually than to benchmark interactively. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to optimize proactively than to redefine iteravely. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to synergize dynamically. Quick: do you have a B2C strategy for managing emerging schemas? If you disintermediate transparently, you may have to brand compellingly. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. We have come to know that if you leverage compellingly then you may also innovate macro-cyber-intra-wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The e-services factor is sexy. Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. We will target the capacity of power shifts to e-enable.