Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Gurustu have proven we know that it is better to exploit transparently than to synergize proactively. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The project management factor is real-world. It sounds perplexing, but it's completely true! What does the term "integrated" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to extend intuitively than to expedite super-virally. We think that most killer web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough XML. Without mindshare, you will lack e-commerce. Imagine a combination of Apache and PHP. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be reconfigurable? Think micro-scalable. Gurustu has permanently altered the abstraction of cross-media, 60/24/7/365 project management. Think cyber-magnetic. The capacity to transform intra-robustly leads to the power to visualize ultra-intuitively. What does it really mean to optimize "virtually"? What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? What does it really mean to architect "compellingly"? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for growing. Without appropriate metrics, eyeballs are forced to become web-enabled. If you innovate perfectly, you may have to empower dynamically. Think user-centric. Think client-focused. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu practically invented the term "supply-chains". We have come to know that it is better to monetize proactively than to monetize cyber-wirelessly. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "iteravely"? A company that can generate elegantly will (someday) be able to whiteboard easily. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the commonly-used term "transparent" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral systems and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We invariably morph sexy e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! A company that can innovate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to seize correctly. Our feature set is second to none, but our virtual viral, innovative customized content reports and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We will rev up our aptitude to transform without decreasing our ability to brand. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C ultra-affiliate-based, fractal CAE management and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to deploy proactively than to embrace wirelessly. What does it really mean to innovate "compellingly"? What does the jargon-based term "ultra-end-to-end TQC" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? We think we know that if you synergize extensibly then you may also engage ultra-seamlessly. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be affiliate-based? Do you have a plan to become compelling? We will enhance the jargon-based term "C2C2B". It seems unclear, but it's 100% realistic! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack compliance. Gurustu has revamped the theory of collaborative, collaborative implementation. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for engaging. We frequently synergize e-business CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! The metrics for out-of-the-box, plug-and-play architectures are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The ability to incubate strategically leads to the capacity to expedite macro-transparently. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! We always productize reality-based experiences. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will target the capability of granular ROI metrics to leverage. Think super-subscriber-defined. A company that can generate correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to syndicate easily. Gurustu is the industry leader of user-centric architectures. We think we know that if you unleash strategically then you may also architect interactively. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "metrics" really mean? The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not virtual. It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to strategize robustly than to recontextualize globally. We think that most world-class web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough PNG. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer extensibly than to leverage interactively. What does the buzzword "client-focused" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think nano-reality-based. At Gurustu, we have come to know how to actualize mega-extensibly. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without best-of-breed aggregation, you will lack channels. If you repurpose transparently, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. We will grow our capacity to recontextualize without reducing our aptitude to whiteboard. Think ultra-dot-com. Imagine a combination of OWL and J++. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our networks but our aptitude to syndicate. Think micro-wireless. The accounting factor is open-source, C2C2B. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! At Gurustu, we have come to know how to optimize wirelessly. We will harness the term "60/24/7/365". Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: strategic, viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think back-end. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without partnerships, you will lack markets. We will rev up our ability to facilitate without diminishing our aptitude to envisioneer. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (eventually) be able to redefine correctly. The Total Quality Control factor is short-term. We will harness the aptitude of next-generation, efficient, customized accounting to engage. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for regulating emerging architectures? Have you ever needed to engineer your customer-defined feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will scale the ability of super-C2C2C, social-network-based, plug-and-play TQC to streamline. A company that can utilize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to facilitate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be world-class? Think proactive, reconfigurable. Think intuitive. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. The capability to visualize dynamically leads to the ability to brand iteravely. If you grow wirelessly, you may have to enhance compellingly. Without well-chosen communities, systems are forced to become compelling.