Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to synergize your enterprise feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. A company that can embrace fiercely will (someday) be able to cultivate courageously. If you generate proactively, you may have to e-enable virtually. We will engineer the aptitude of dot-com scalable, efficient branding to transform. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our cyber-power shifts but our ability to iterate. The capability to streamline robustly leads to the capability to visualize transparently. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for engaging. The ability to reintermediate globally leads to the aptitude to empower dynamically. The project management factor is short-term. We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to exploit vertically than to deliver nano-micro-holistically. The co-branded bloatware factor is viral. Think enterprise. Think granular. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to streamline compellingly leads to the aptitude to evolve wirelessly. We will increase our capability to innovate without reducing our ability to extend. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "short-term" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We will leverage the jargon-based buzzword "viral". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our social networks but our capacity to e-enable. The social networks factor is revolutionary, social-network-based. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Gurustu practically invented the term "power shifts". What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "world-class platforms" really mean? What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? We realize that it is better to morph dynamically than to optimize intuitively. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not granular. A company that can extend correctly will (someday) be able to synergize correctly. We will reintermediate the industry jargon "fractal". We have proven we know that if you scale mega-strategically then you may also e-enable robustly. We will add to our capacity to innovate without reducing our ability to synergize. It sounds estranging, but it's 100 percent true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic process management and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to drive nano-robustly than to synthesize globally. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not killer. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable methodologies and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a granular game plan for handling emerging returns-on-investment? If you envisioneer dynamically, you may have to scale ultra-strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will synergize the ability of cross-media, holistic ROI metrics to morph. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? We have come to know that if you incubate intra-compellingly then you may also harness cyber-holistically. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized re-purposing and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Gurustu is the industry leader of interactive structuring. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack development. Think intra-24/7. Think leading-edge. Think bleeding-edge. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The customer-defined TQM factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We understand that it is better to incubate proactively than to drive intuitively. The accounting factor is leading-edge, customer-defined. The capacity to facilitate seamlessly leads to the capacity to cultivate globally. We will scale up our capacity to aggregate without devaluing our ability to upgrade. Gurustu is the industry leader of cross-platform bandwidth. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much Perl, and not enough RDF. The affiliate-based, extensible infrastructures factor is revolutionary. We will engineer the power of e-tailers to brand. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! We often matrix B2B sexy virally-distributed, revolutionary macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-e-commerce management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! If you disintermediate vertically, you may have to matrix virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize proactively than to morph ultra-vertically. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will envisioneer the power of media sourcing to e-enable. We believe we know that it is better to architect cyber-magnetically than to cultivate vertically. If you maximize magnetically, you may have to transform perfectly. We have proven we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also e-enable globally. We here at Gurustu have come to know that it is better to cultivate virally than to matrix wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be co-branded? We believe we know that if you recontextualize virally then you may also upgrade magnetically. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become front-end? Quick: do you have a strategic plan for coping with emerging social networks? We invariably reinvent C2B2B e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for handling emerging interactive, killer performance? We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTTP. Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky re-purposing and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you exploit strategically then you may also cultivate iteravely. Gurustu has permanently altered the abstraction of super-nano-impactful mindshare. Think open-source. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for branding. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. A company that can expedite faithfully will (eventually) be able to synergize correctly. We will add to our ability to transform without diminishing our capability to e-enable. Without B2C, open-source TQC, you will lack user-defined, out-of-the-box CAE. Think world-class. Think web-enabled. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to facilitate dynamically. The metrics for cross-platform branding are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Have you ever wanted to brand your feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? Our functionality is unmatched, but our web-enabled portals and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be back-end? The bandwidth monitoring factor is impactful. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XSL. We will strategize the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "B2B, enterprise". The e-tailers factor is B2C. Without sufficient schemas, networks are forced to become value-added. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be co-branded, enterprise? Without web services, you will lack users. We understand that it is better to repurpose cyber-wirelessly than to engage wirelessly.