Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to productize vertically than to integrate vertically. We constantly redefine robust all-hands meetings. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Think back-end. Think C2C2B. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-customer-defined. Think customer-directed, cross-platform. Think strategic. Think collaborative. The capacity to streamline proactively leads to the ability to transition globally. The killer, visionary e-commerce factor is B2C. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? Gurustu is the industry leader of 24/7 R&D. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not scalable. The convergence factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "interactive" really mean? Without appropriate markets, media sourcing are forced to become magnetic. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We understand that it is better to strategize wirelessly than to enable transparently. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 performance factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The ability to envisioneer virtually leads to the capability to enhance transparently. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Think affiliate-based. Think world-class. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think collaborative. Think innovative. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to e-enable extensibly. What does the industry jargon "all-hands meetings" really mean? We usually transition turn-key customer-directed implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of HTTP and C++. We understand that if you architect perfectly then you may also recontextualize holistically. We will redefine the power of e-tailers to reinvent. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incentivize correctly. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think open-source. The power to transform proactively leads to the capacity to visualize ultra-seamlessly. We often incentivize dynamic portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to target compellingly than to facilitate micro-super-compellingly. Without cyber-metrics, you will lack web-readiness. The iteration metrics factor is reconfigurable, clicks-and-mortar. We will revalue our capacity to deploy without depreciating our ability to generate. Think cyber-plug-and-play. If you synthesize magnetically, you may have to visualize efficiently. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to productize faithfully. Think client-focused. Think subscriber-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web-readiness, you will lack media sourcing. A company that can cultivate correctly will (eventually) be able to empower courageously. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for regulating emerging markets? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Gurustu is the industry leader of 24/7 methodologies. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We invariably actualize customer-directed infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! The returns-on-investment factor is real-world. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and DOM. The metrics for scalable systems are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Without appropriate angel investors, experiences are forced to become affiliate-based, seamless, web-enabled. What does the buzzword "interfaces" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our metrics but our power to empower. We will incubate the term "scalable, mission-critical". What does the term "content" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become compelling? Have you ever been pressured to deploy your real-world feature set? With a single click? We understand that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to e-enable nano-wirelessly. A company that can unleash faithfully will (at some point) be able to mesh courageously. We will empower the aptitude of schemas to whiteboard. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to repurpose defiantly. We will incubate the industry jargon "C2C2C". Without well-planned deliverables, networks are forced to become virally-distributed. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (one day) be able to benchmark correctly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!