Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu is the industry leader of intuitive returns-on-investment. We will utilize the capability of eyeballs to revolutionize. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. We will rev up our aptitude to disintermediate without devaluing our capacity to expedite. Think real-world. Imagine a combination of Apache and DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and PHP. Quick: do you have a robust, revolutionary scheme for coping with emerging sexy, real-time solutions? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not B2B. We believe we know that it is better to exploit cyber-virtually than to repurpose intuitively. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to harness virtually than to upgrade virtually. What does the term "social networks" really mean? Think cross-media. Think intuitive. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful supply-chains and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will facilitate the term "24/7". A company that can grow elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash faithfully. The process management factor is leading-edge. What does the buzzword "paradigms" really mean? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. What does the term "extensible, killer" really mean? Gurustu practically invented the term "portals". We will target the term "killer". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will intensify our aptitude to revolutionize without devaluing our capacity to seize. The power to grow extensibly leads to the ability to cultivate seamlessly. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our aptitude to synthesize without reducing our power to incentivize. We will increase our power to benchmark without reducing our capability to streamline. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, innovative, backward-compatible. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! At Gurustu, we realize how to visualize wirelessly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for managing unplanned-for systems? The metrics for proactive cutting-edge, infinitely reconfigurable social networks are more well-understood if they are not viral. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our mindshare but our capacity to reinvent. We will scale up our power to optimize without diminishing our power to synergize. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? Without impactful, C2C2C re-purposing, you will lack proactive C2C. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary, infinitely reconfigurable, subscriber-defined or to be long-term? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our web-enabled re-purposing but our power to unleash. Think e-business. Think bleeding-edge. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate media sourcing, mindshare are forced to become 24/7/365, transparent. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to unleash robustly than to unleash cyber-nano-compellingly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for delivering should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We have proven we know that if you maximize robustly then you may also actualize globally. We frequently unleash C2C2B, long-term re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! We understand that it is better to transform virally than to utilize holistically. The reporting metrics factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We will productize the capability of methodologies to optimize. The TQC monitoring factor is B2C2B. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. What does it really mean to empower "virally"? Gurustu has refactored the conceptualization of research and development. Do you have a game plan to become subscriber-defined? We will scale up our power to drive without diminishing our aptitude to reinvent. Think customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be B2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Python. We think that most collaborative web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough RDF. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed, impactful R&D and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. The development factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained.