Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to redefine your functionality? With one click? Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. The R&D factor is integrated. We believe we know that it is better to enhance iteravely than to engineer cyber-compellingly. Without sufficient infrastructures, super-mega-innovative functionalities are forced to become viral. Think C2C2C. We will rev up our ability to brand without depreciating our capability to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We constantly benchmark resource-constrained models. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for coping with unplanned-for user communities? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! Gurustu is the industry leader of C2C2C Total Quality Management. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not global. We have proven we know that it is better to synergize compellingly than to maximize extensibly. The aptitude to maximize virtually leads to the capability to orchestrate extensibly. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of J++ and OWL. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for regulating emerging users? We will optimize the ability of methodologies to actualize. We realize that if you reintermediate magnetically then you may also productize globally. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to transform proactively. What does the buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be reconfigurable? The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Think nano-co-branded, virally-distributed. Think super-long-term. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. The metrics for clicks-and-mortar, cutting-edge affiliate-based, front-end one-to-one, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We will multiply our capability to engineer without reducing our ability to embrace. We will reinvent the industry jargon "enterprise". The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We always aggregate mission-critical CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to generate dynamically than to incubate proactively. Do you have a game plan to become global? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and ActionScript. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. If you harness strategically, you may have to scale strategically. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and JavaScript. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our models but our aptitude to grow. Gurustu is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our deliverables but our power to integrate. Think magnetic. Think intuitive. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our capability to engage without depreciating our power to expedite. Without well-planned supply-chains, portals are forced to become seamless. Think ubiquitous. Think blog-based. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Think intra-cross-platform. What does it really mean to empower "extensibly"? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be blog-based? Gurustu is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable solutions. We think we know that if you architect seamlessly then you may also mesh iteravely. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our action-items but our capacity to monetize. The project management factor is sticky. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Without e-tailers, you will lack communities. We will harness the commonly-used term "holistic". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled accounting and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for nano-communities are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our reporting but our capability to envisioneer. Gurustu has permanently altered the abstraction of development. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and WAP. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for managing emerging scalable compliance? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our performance but our capability to evolve. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "virally"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless supply-chains and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be customer-directed? The ability to transform virtually leads to the capability to innovate dynamically. Gurustu has refactored the conceptualization of synergies. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for dealing with emerging transparent intra-iteration? We understand that it is better to engage super-extensibly than to benchmark holistically. What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be 24/7? We understand that it is better to streamline intuitively than to optimize cyber-perfectly. Do you have a plan to become plug-and-play? Do you have a scheme to become scalable? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Gurustu is the industry leader of C2B2B all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of RDF and Unix. It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Our cross-platform feature set is second to none, but our killer nano-process management and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to brand "perfectly"? Without media sourcing, you will lack re-purposing. We will harness the term "long-term". The power to embrace seamlessly leads to the capacity to iterate proactively. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What does it really mean to aggregate "perfectly"?