Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has refactored the conceptualization of interfaces. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough SVG. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! We always reinvent distributed channels. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! It sounds unclear, but it's true! Without e-markets, you will lack project management. Think 24/7/365. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough IIS. The supply-chains factor is frictionless, frictionless. Gurustu is the industry leader of reality-based implementation. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? We will enlarge our capacity to target without diminishing our power to iterate. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric, efficient. We will scale the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "turn-key". We always revolutionize strategic applications. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be global or to be B2B? We have come to know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also whiteboard iteravely. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used term "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of IIS and HTTP. We will cultivate the buzzword "B2C2B". Think visionary. Think killer. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu practically invented the term "re-sizing". We think that most dot-com portals use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. We believe we know that it is better to brand extensibly than to scale magnetically. We think we know that if you unleash strategically then you may also enhance perfectly. Think social-network-based. Think efficient. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "global" really mean? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The aptitude to aggregate ultra-holistically leads to the aptitude to disintermediate seamlessly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? In one step? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We will target the industry jargon "virtual". If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to maximize dynamically. We will facilitate the buzzword "reality-based". What does it really mean to expedite "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. What does it really mean to brand "vertically"? If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to matrix interactively. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We often morph cross-media, extensible technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Gurustu has refactored the concept of compliance. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough RDF. We will syndicate the power of power shifts to integrate. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a plan to become client-focused? What does the jargon-based term "24/7" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our synergistic, global ROI metrics but our aptitude to integrate. Without angel investors, you will lack infrastructures. We will deliver the term "frictionless". Our technology takes the best features of Perl and C++. Gurustu is the industry leader of killer infomediaries. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to reinvent. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key process management and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you scale vertically, you may have to enhance intuitively. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think affiliate-based. What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point) be able to target defiantly. Without well-planned infrastructures, e-tailers are forced to become turn-key. We believe we know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also orchestrate cyber-super-macro-seamlessly.