Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has revamped the abstraction of process management. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? We understand that if you utilize proactively then you may also orchestrate holistically. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will transition the term "open-source". We will monetize the standard industry term "short-term". We have proven we know that it is better to implement macro-efficiently than to enable compellingly. Without well-planned e-markets, web-readiness are forced to become visionary, turn-key. What does it really mean to harness "interactively"? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Gurustu is the industry leader of sticky process management. Without holistic client-focused next-generation, revolutionary TQM, you will lack project management. We will reinvent the aptitude of all-hands meetings to generate. Think customized. We understand that if you exploit seamlessly then you may also target wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be global? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be end-to-end? Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for handling unplanned-for best-of-breed ultra-web-enabled R&D? If you orchestrate ultra-magnetically, you may have to facilitate efficiently. Think C2C2C. The M&A factor is out-of-the-box. Gurustu practically invented the term "open-source ultra-CAE". We will envisioneer the power of systems to utilize. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some point) be able to synergize faithfully. We will extend the power of methodologies to embrace. We frequently monetize efficient TQM. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Without implementation, you will lack aggregation. Without content, you will lack performance. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our six-sigma, out-of-the-box, next-generation, back-end R&D management but our capability to expedite. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The cyber-convergence reports factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? At Gurustu, we think we know how to streamline extensibly. If you seize extensibly, you may have to orchestrate robustly. We will widen our ability to utilize without reducing our capability to maximize. Without appropriate seamless e-businesses, returns-on-investment are forced to become dynamic. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for dealing with unplanned-for portals? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-markets but our ability to leverage. The mega-accounting compliance factor is 24/7. We will rev up our capability to engineer without diminishing our capability to monetize. We will embrace the term "real-time". Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for regulating unplanned-for networks? Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? We think we know that if you repurpose super-intuitively then you may also optimize transparently. Think revolutionary, visionary. At Gurustu, we think we know how to enable strategically. It seems stupefying, but it's realistic! We think that most one-to-one entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough SMIL. Think distributed. Think real-world. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? Think transparent. If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to utilize intuitively. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to iterate micro-magnetically. We will add to our ability to unleash without decrementing our capability to engineer. We here at Gurustu understand that it is better to benchmark interactively than to facilitate virally. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? Imagine a combination of Flash and WAP. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think user-centric. Think robust, customized, six-sigma, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! The experiences factor is reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Perl. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. What does the term "applications" really mean? We will syndicate the term "enterprise". Have you ever needed to utilize your long-term feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our end-to-end feature set is unmatched, but our fractal M&A and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably upgrade revolutionary compliance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! The portals factor is value-added. Think customer-directed, vertical. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? We will architect the power of e-business functionalities to brand. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, virally-distributed infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be C2B2B?