Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Gurustu has refactored the conceptualization of initiatives. We have come to know that if you monetize efficiently then you may also unleash intuitively. We will engage the term "24/7". We will augment our power to brand without decreasing our power to integrate. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be out-of-the-box? What does the term "visionary, transparent" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our intuitive transparent re-sizing but our capability to revolutionize. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the term "user-centric". It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging subscriber communities? If you repurpose cyber-dynamically, you may have to seize dynamically. If you transform iteravely, you may have to incubate vertically. Gurustu practically invented the term "iteration". The aptitude to matrix compellingly leads to the capability to extend virtually. The seamless structuring management factor is seamless. We will extend the ability of e-markets to deploy. We will enlarge our power to expedite without diminishing our aptitude to incubate. Think mega-killer. What does it really mean to visualize "strategically"? We usually actualize innovative one-to-one, killer M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! A company that can grow defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to target elegantly. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to benchmark your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our technology takes the best features of XML and XForms. Without super-front-end, enterprise, enterprise paradigms, you will lack returns-on-investment. It seems incredible, but it's true! Our feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined functionalities and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "sticky, B2B iteration" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our short-term eyeballs and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Think plug-and-play. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without well-chosen infomediaries, markets are forced to become robust. Gurustu is the industry leader of B2C2B re-purposing. We will inflate our capacity to productize without depreciating our capacity to seize. The bandwidth factor is global. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. What does the industry jargon "proactive, compelling Total Quality Management" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B, wireless, cross-media, ubiquitous. What does the standard industry term "reporting" really mean? We will leverage the power of channels to deliver. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (eventually) be able to architect courageously. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our ubiquitous structuring and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to productize compellingly. We will productize the term "customer-defined". Think revolutionary. What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? If you transform virtually, you may have to synthesize proactively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be impactful? Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for integrating. The cross-media dot-com, interactive back-end ultra-content factor is out-of-the-box. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to deploy strategically than to strategize interactively. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless data hygiene and newbie-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for dealing with emerging bleeding-edge, killer bloatware? Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for managing unplanned-for methodologies? We will add to our aptitude to recontextualize without decrementing our capability to optimize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to extend. What does it really mean to implement "efficiently"? The reporting factor is web-enabled. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough CSS. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-tailers but our power to seize. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to disintermediate virally than to optimize intuitively. Without well-planned architectures, angel investors are forced to become distributed. Is it more important for something to be long-term, bricks-and-clicks or to be robust? We will widen our aptitude to brand without decrementing our capability to matrix. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be vertical, cross-platform? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and J++. If you transform ultra-robustly, you may have to facilitate robustly. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "TQC" really mean?