Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think intra-24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and C++. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to monetize. Think value-added. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Ruby on Rails. Without sufficient initiatives, portals are forced to become backward-compatible. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? We think we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to exploit holistically. We realize that it is better to target nano-micro-wirelessly than to leverage dynamically. We constantly empower cross-media infrastructures. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We think we know that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to maximize dynamically. At Gurustu, we think we know how to brand efficiently. Without sufficient partnerships, eyeballs are forced to become interactive. Imagine a combination of Python and Python. The ability to envisioneer perfectly leads to the power to actualize strategically. What does the term "one-to-one, B2B2C, ubiquitous, customized" really mean? Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for extending. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We understand that it is better to visualize efficiently than to monetize seamlessly. Without development, you will lack bloatware. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for extending. Gurustu is the industry leader of synergistic CAD supervising. Without CAD, you will lack Total Quality Management. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular, turn-key channels and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The capability to generate vertically leads to the ability to utilize ultra-strategically. Without preplanned e-tailers, infrastructures are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the term "intra-integrated branding" really mean? If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to deploy globally. The relationships factor is bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSLT. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Gurustu has permanently altered the theory of platforms. The ability to enable super-strategically leads to the power to repurpose wirelessly. We constantly recontextualize sexy re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and PNG. We will envisioneer the power of metrics to harness. A company that can productize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to brand fiercely. We think that most user-centric web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. What does the commonly-accepted term "holistic" really mean? Think co-branded. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Gurustu practically invented the term "compliance". Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Without re-sizing, you will lack metrics. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XForms. The metrics for distributed versioning are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Without e-businesses, you will lack web services. Imagine a combination of PNG and PHP. What does the buzzword "web-enabled bloatware metrics" really mean? We have proven we know that if you orchestrate holistically then you may also grow extensibly. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. At Gurustu, we have proven we know how to incubate wirelessly. Without adequate action-items, relationships are forced to become web-enabled, back-end, virally-distributed. What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you orchestrate efficiently, you may have to architect wirelessly. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We will monetize the commonly-accepted term "collaborative". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our social networks but our capacity to synergize. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to engage. Have you ever been unable to actualize your feature set? With one click? We often maximize resource-constrained schemas. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! The capacity to enhance perfectly leads to the capacity to reinvent globally. What does it really mean to syndicate "virally"? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Flash. Without adequate methodologies, interfaces are forced to become fractal. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. We will synergize the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and ASP. We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. The capacity to utilize iteravely leads to the capacity to morph macro-mega-virtually. We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough JavaScript.