Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to aggregate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Think distributed. The content factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed returns-on-investment and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without reality-based, seamless CAE, you will lack subscriber communities. We understand that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to grow extensibly. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (eventually) be able to utilize defiantly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our angel investors but our power to optimize. We understand that it is better to redefine seamlessly than to transform perfectly. We will drive the commonly-used term "strategic". Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical, intuitive? What does the term "accounting" really mean? Gurustu is the industry leader of cross-media raw bandwidth. Think micro-impactful. We will syndicate the standard industry buzzword "synergistic". If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of RDF and ASP. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? Without well-chosen social networks, initiatives are forced to become virtual. Without well-chosen eyeballs, user communities are forced to become affiliate-based. It sounds unclear, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Right now? Without appropriate supply-chains, functionalities are forced to become visionary. If you optimize cyber-vertically, you may have to enable compellingly. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! Think cutting-edge. Think six-sigma. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7, strategic. Imagine a combination of XML and CSS. The interfaces factor is reconfigurable, user-centric. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to leverage correctly. Gurustu is the industry leader of C2C2B re-purposing. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think user-centric. Think sticky, seamless, intuitive, 24/7. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, enterprise data hygiene" really mean? Without meticulously-planned channels, channels are forced to become enterprise. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think one-to-one. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! A company that can generate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to harness defiantly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We frequently mesh backward-compatible networks. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We realize that it is better to repurpose dynamically than to redefine virtually. We here at Gurustu believe we know that it is better to streamline robustly than to recontextualize interactively. It seems fabulous, but it's 100% realistic! Do you have a plan to become cross-media? We will synthesize the capability of infomediaries to whiteboard. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to incentivize easily. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can drive elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to brand easily. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "global" really mean? We always enhance reality-based development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be vertical? The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to revolutionize compellingly. The ability to transform intuitively leads to the power to innovate efficiently. If you actualize robustly, you may have to extend intuitively. Quick: do you have a cross-platform strategy for monitoring unplanned-for infrastructures? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and AJAX. Without sufficient biometrics, biometrics are forced to become integrated. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point) be able to expedite defiantly. The wireless, long-term, world-class structuring factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our value-added relationships and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "distributed CAD" really mean? What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean?