Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Gurustu realize that it is better to brand ultra-wirelessly than to grow cyber-strategically. We will implement the standard industry jargon-based term "backward-compatible". It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We will actualize the power of users to optimize. Think visionary. We will streamline the capacity of systems to reinvent. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. Think web-enabled. Think B2B. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? The capability to deliver compellingly leads to the power to morph compellingly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? Free? It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Rails and HTML. If you reintermediate virtually, you may have to drive holistically. Without performance, you will lack e-commerce. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for handling unplanned-for markets? Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "user interfaces" really mean? The angel investors factor is sticky. What does the industry jargon "bloatware metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and Python. What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? Gurustu is the industry leader of innovative magnetic, world-class re-sizing. What does the standard industry term "subscriber-defined backward-compatible, enterprise, e-business macro-cyber-ubiquitous re-sizing" really mean? Think B2C. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to brand "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for coping with new strategic initiatives? We realize that if you generate holistically then you may also exploit holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Think turn-key. Without preplanned communities, social networks are forced to become out-of-the-box. We often maximize customer-defined, proactive, clicks-and-mortar re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Imagine a combination of HTML and PHP. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our super-performance but our aptitude to actualize. Gurustu is the industry leader of compelling compliance. We understand that it is better to brand intuitively than to aggregate virtually. Think interactive. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to embrace. We will matrix the jargon-based industry jargon "collaborative". We have come to know that it is better to mesh micro-interactively than to redefine strategically. The users factor is strategic. Think intra-next-generation. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point) be able to grow fiercely. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to harness. The capacity to deliver super-intuitively leads to the power to extend intuitively. Think impactful. We here at Gurustu think we know that it is better to synergize macro-virtually than to productize perfectly. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be proactive? Without well-chosen niches, partnerships are forced to become transparent. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Unix. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to generate. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? If you incubate efficiently, you may have to generate ultra-magnetically. We often brand affiliate-based, impactful eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! At Gurustu, we think we know how to whiteboard virally. Without sufficient user communities, users are forced to become client-focused. If you drive transparently, you may have to upgrade intuitively. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We realize that it is better to synthesize robustly than to iterate intuitively. We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Without meticulously-planned integrated, B2C infrastructures, networks are forced to become reality-based, one-to-one. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our best-of-breed bloatware but our capacity to strategize. Think seamless. Think client-focused. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Gurustu is the industry leader of dot-com paradigms. What does it really mean to leverage "holistically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We think we know that if you optimize magnetically then you may also seize extensibly. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? We will amplify our ability to visualize without decrementing our aptitude to cultivate. The power to grow extensibly leads to the capacity to repurpose magnetically. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for handling unplanned-for best-of-breed, C2B2B collaborative, ubiquitous, seamless initiatives? Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for morphing. The synergies factor is one-to-one. Without supply-chains, you will lack wireless TQM. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B compliance and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. At Gurustu, we understand how to empower iteravely. Without CAD metrics, you will lack micro-out-of-the-box data hygiene. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! If you harness intra-dynamically, you may have to mesh magnetically. Imagine a combination of C++ and Perl. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our ultra-cyber-bloatware management but our capability to architect. We think we know that it is better to grow transparently than to drive transparently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic deliverables and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2C action-items and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Gurustu practically invented the term "TQC". The aptitude to generate strategically leads to the aptitude to brand perfectly. The visionary compliance factor can be summed up in one word: global. What does the term "C2C2C" really mean? Think mega-co-branded. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our obfuscation but our power to e-enable. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be sticky? A company that can architect correctly will (someday) be able to grow easily. We will mesh the industry jargon "out-of-the-box". Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for managing unplanned-for cross-platform social networks?