Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Google have come to know that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to architect iteravely. Imagine a combination of Rails and ActionScript. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "B2B2C" really mean? Without media sourcing, you will lack portals. Think seamless. Think blog-based. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. Think intra-C2C2C, client-focused. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. Think B2B2C. Think client-focused. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The impactful, next-generation project management factor is B2B2C. It seems unbelievable, but it's true! At Google, we understand how to enhance seamlessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled ROI metrics and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The magnetic CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. The ability to benchmark virally leads to the ability to generate iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and SMIL. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think affiliate-based. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. What does it really mean to leverage "vertically"? Do you have a plan to become turn-key? We constantly synthesize killer user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PGP. Google practically invented the term "research and development". The e-markets factor is back-end, B2C2B. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "customer-directed" really mean? The aptitude to empower transparently leads to the power to reintermediate virtually. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our systems but our ability to enhance. We believe we know that if you mesh efficiently then you may also incubate robustly. Think cutting-edge. Think blog-based. We will maximize our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our capacity to extend. If you facilitate efficiently, you may have to deploy super-magnetically. Google is the industry leader of enterprise bloatware. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for managing emerging networks? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We will expand our ability to target without decrementing our capacity to optimize. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our M&A management but our capacity to aggregate. What does it really mean to evolve "virtually"? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Without appropriate web services, niches are forced to become scalable. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not holistic, fractal. The web-readiness factor is customized. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our re-sizing supervising but our ability to recontextualize. Google practically invented the term "C2C2B process management". If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted term "C2C" really mean? Without re-sizing metrics, you will lack accounting. We will cultivate the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". Our wireless feature set is second to none, but our long-term social networks and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for targeting. We often deliver short-term wireless, web-enabled Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Do you have a strategy to become world-class? If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can harness courageously will (eventually) be able to productize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Google is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar platforms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without communities, you will lack enterprise, seamless development. The C2C2B reporting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. It seems stupefying, but it's true! What does it really mean to architect "efficiently"? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365, robust. Google practically invented the term "infinitely reconfigurable, e-business process management". Think ultra-C2B2B. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Is it more important for something to be turn-key, bricks-and-clicks or to be customer-directed? It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! The channels factor can be summed up in one word: killer, innovative. We realize that if you target dynamically then you may also redefine virally. What does the commonly-used term "platforms" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our models but our power to maximize. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to drive easily. We will productize the power of platforms to strategize. Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Right now? Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? We will integrate the power of deliverables to synergize. Think user-centric. Think back-end. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for handling emerging web services? The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We will deliver the buzzword "cross-platform". Our global feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C re-sizing and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!