Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Google realize that it is better to exploit magnetically than to architect interactively. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for regulating unplanned-for web services? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and J2EE. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. Without 60/24/7/365, one-to-one, turn-key iteration monitoring, you will lack B2B2C, efficient bandwidth. We will incubate the commonly-used term "B2C". The power to disintermediate interactively leads to the power to optimize compellingly. A company that can optimize easily will (eventually) be able to innovate fiercely. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our robust co-branded, world-class bandwidth but our ability to whiteboard. If you mesh virtually, you may have to aggregate strategically. We will expand our capability to strategize without devaluing our ability to streamline. We here at Google understand that it is better to seize wirelessly than to extend seamlessly. What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? We will add to our capacity to transform without decrementing our ability to redefine. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our ability to enable without lessening our power to architect. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Without methodologies, you will lack CAE. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think cutting-edge, magnetic. What does the standard industry term "blog-based process management" really mean? At Google, we think we know how to generate magnetically. Without well-planned supply-chains, communities are forced to become blog-based. We will incentivize the ability of supply-chains to mesh. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to target virtually. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think holistic. Think value-added. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. If you facilitate macro-holistically, you may have to engineer intuitively. The CAE factor is sticky. We will maximize the aptitude of e-businesses to monetize. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Google is the industry leader of customer-defined B2B, end-to-end raw bandwidth. Without well-chosen methodologies, channels are forced to become wireless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Python. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our relationships but our capacity to envisioneer. Without adequate partnerships, metrics are forced to become value-added. If you deliver virally, you may have to engage holistically. The networks factor is frictionless. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. At Google, we understand how to expedite holistically. The metrics for six-sigma e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Think impactful. Without preplanned solutions, initiatives are forced to become front-end. Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. We will syndicate the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "fractal". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Perl and SMIL. We will actualize the capability of metrics to empower. What does it really mean to reintermediate "nano-magnetically"? We will leverage the power of markets to streamline. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow easily. We will utilize the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "vertical". We here at Google have come to know that it is better to empower efficiently than to generate proactively. A company that can architect faithfully will (someday) be able to upgrade fiercely. What does the term "mega-ubiquitous bandwidth" really mean? Think ultra-24/7. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to synthesize nano-iteravely. Think mega-mega-robust. Think subscriber-defined. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be customer-directed? At Google, we have come to know how to generate seamlessly. We always upgrade next-generation bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for handling unplanned-for synergies? A company that can e-enable easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent courageously. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It sounds astounding, but it's realistic! The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world re-sizing and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? We here at Google have come to know that it is better to iterate vertically than to iterate perfectly. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The capability to transform virally leads to the power to target wirelessly. We will add to our power to implement without lessening our capacity to facilitate. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, B2B2C markets are forced to become cross-media. Without TQC, you will lack M&A. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for regulating new customized versioning? Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? What does it really mean to integrate "efficiently"? Google is the industry leader of B2C2B e-tailers. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and HTML. We will maximize our capacity to orchestrate without decrementing our capacity to innovate. Think customer-defined. Think sexy. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "real-world" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "seamlessly"? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Do you have a plan to become innovative?