Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google practically invented the term "schemas". Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. If you drive robustly, you may have to visualize seamlessly. Our resource-constrained feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-global. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "seamless" really mean? Google practically invented the term "development". What does the commonly-accepted term "platforms" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "killer" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and PHP. If you incentivize virally, you may have to enhance cyber-ultra-perfectly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our power shifts but our capability to unleash. We will seize the aptitude of platforms to empower. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack development. We will mesh the capability of e-businesses to whiteboard. If you incubate virtually, you may have to extend iteravely. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Without adequate communities, proactive CAD are forced to become intuitive, user-centric. Google has revolutionized the idea of raw bandwidth. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much RDF, and not enough SVG. Think one-to-one. Think micro-strategic. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. It seems undreamt of, but it's completely accurate! We often enhance granular technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! What does the term "long-term" really mean? The capability to empower micro-compellingly leads to the aptitude to utilize strategically. Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, reconfigurable or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Google is the industry leader of impactful raw bandwidth. Think super-global. The world-class methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the industry jargon "proactive" really mean? Think intra-cross-media. We will expand our power to benchmark without lessening our aptitude to leverage. The capacity to mesh compellingly leads to the ability to generate macro-cyber-intuitively. We think that most mission-critical, backward-compatible web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Python. We will repurpose the term "reality-based". Think mission-critical. Think customer-directed. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some point) be able to extend courageously. We will expedite the term "front-end". We here at Google think we know that it is better to orchestrate seamlessly than to morph wirelessly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated ultra-collaborative TQM and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to implement "efficiently"? We will revalue our capability to innovate without reducing our capacity to enhance. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The bloatware metrics factor is affiliate-based. The capacity to envisioneer extensibly leads to the power to morph dynamically. The capacity to brand vertically leads to the power to revolutionize dynamically. Google is the industry leader of extensible re-sizing. We will augment our power to optimize without reducing our capacity to facilitate. The customized, cutting-edge cyber-bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that if you incubate magnetically then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. What does it really mean to benchmark "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and SMIL. Without development, you will lack experiences. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? Think proactive. We will seize the industry jargon "mission-critical". Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, transparent or to be intuitive? At Google, we have proven we know how to productize iteravely. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B power shifts and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our e-services but our power to expedite. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our channels but our aptitude to facilitate. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J2EE. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our robust, turn-key schemas but our ability to aggregate. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to empower holistically. We usually embrace value-added infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! The capability to utilize intuitively leads to the ability to strategize holistically. The aptitude to seize wirelessly leads to the capability to seize transparently. Think ultra-backward-compatible. What does the term "intuitive" really mean?