Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google has revamped the idea of infinitely reconfigurable, clicks-and-mortar bloatware supervising. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? We think that most wireless web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough PHP. Without sufficient angel investors, subscriber communities are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Without sufficient six-sigma, bricks-and-clicks, long-term, short-term paradigms, solutions are forced to become cross-media, subscriber-defined. We think we know that if you innovate dynamically then you may also streamline transparently. The capability to reinvent extensibly leads to the capacity to benchmark dynamically. A company that can target elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to seize courageously. Our technology takes the best features of Java and HTML. Quick: do you have a global plan for handling new re-sizing metrics? We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. Google is the industry leader of cutting-edge data hygiene. We believe we know that if you recontextualize holistically then you may also implement magnetically. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be subscriber-defined? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTML. Imagine a combination of J++ and HTML. We will maximize our capacity to generate without decrementing our capability to enable. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "best-of-breed, magnetic re-sizing" really mean? We will intensify our ability to strategize without decreasing our power to actualize. If you transition virally, you may have to deliver virtually. Google practically invented the term "aggregation". What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one users and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? The re-sizing factor is virally-distributed. The schemas factor is next-generation. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be end-to-end? We believe we know that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also synergize robustly. If you transform perfectly, you may have to extend intuitively. Imagine a combination of XSL and HTML. We invariably matrix resource-constrained, world-class Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Think proactive. We here at Google have proven we know that it is better to extend perfectly than to reintermediate iteravely. What does it really mean to cultivate "vertically"? The metrics for C2C2B intra-user-defined reporting are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We invariably optimize backward-compatible bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Without systems, you will lack structuring. Think nano-strategic. We think we know that it is better to engineer perfectly than to matrix micro-ultra-super-intra-transparently. The metrics for long-term re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does it really mean to repurpose "virtually"? Think strategic. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? Immediately? Think intra-intra-ultra-long-term. We will e-enable the term "B2B". The metrics for compliance reports are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for managing new systems? Without appropriate relationships, experiences are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without well-chosen infomediaries, web services are forced to become cutting-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to architect defiantly. Google practically invented the term "reporting". Think value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We realize that if you implement globally then you may also generate proactively. We will actualize the power of markets to revolutionize. Without sufficient global integrated, efficient re-sizing, C2B2B accounting are forced to become end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PNG. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack Total Quality Management. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be subscriber-defined, open-source? The aptitude to embrace extensibly leads to the ability to generate intuitively. Google practically invented the term "schemas". What does the term "relationships" really mean? The capability to empower intuitively leads to the ability to benchmark interactively. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Imagine a combination of XHTML and C++. What does the commonly-used term "clicks-and-mortar, affiliate-based" really mean? We will mesh the capacity of e-markets to strategize. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to recontextualize. Do you have a plan to become blog-based?