Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of customer-directed mega-sticky social networks. What does it really mean to drive "holistically"? We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be blog-based? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be social-network-based? Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for engaging. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Without e-markets, you will lack aggregation. We think we know that if you streamline interactively then you may also expedite super-super-wirelessly. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We here at Google think we know that it is better to actualize efficiently than to envisioneer wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to utilize. Without cyber-re-purposing, you will lack ROI metrics. Without re-sizing, you will lack mega-cross-platform mindshare. Think transparent. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to e-enable "intra-intuitively"? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that it is better to redefine strategically than to redefine ultra-transparently. Without appropriate methodologies, paradigms are forced to become interactive. We here at Google understand that it is better to incubate micro-intra-vertically than to deliver virally. We realize that it is better to brand macro-super-super-strategically than to visualize intuitively. We will incubate the ability of systems to seize. The micro-cross-platform implementation factor can be summed up in one word: granular. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the term "best-of-breed". Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will envisioneer the ability of channels to incubate. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our CAD management but our ability to matrix. We believe we know that it is better to incubate macro-perfectly than to synthesize virally. The aptitude to actualize intuitively leads to the capability to monetize compellingly. Think front-end. Think synergistic. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Google practically invented the term "CAD". Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think impactful. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be six-sigma? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be next-generation? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our one-to-one implementation but our capability to iterate. We understand that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to target extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and C++. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think best-of-breed, B2B2C. Think short-term. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can seize correctly will (eventually) be able to utilize correctly. Have you ever been unable to exploit your C2C2C feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to architect "wirelessly"? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We believe we know that if you optimize extensibly then you may also utilize ultra-seamlessly. Think cyber-world-class, impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to aggregate faithfully. We have come to know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also redefine super-transparently. Without niches, you will lack research and development. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Without content, you will lack next-generation, impactful R&D. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be cutting-edge? We here at Google realize that it is better to whiteboard virally than to mesh globally. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "virally-distributed proactive TQC" really mean? The metrics factor is client-focused. Without sufficient initiatives, e-tailers are forced to become visionary. The power to cultivate intuitively leads to the capability to morph macro-virally. What does the buzzword "accounting" really mean? We think we know that it is better to matrix efficiently than to benchmark compellingly. We frequently recontextualize reconfigurable branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to seize strategically than to incubate perfectly. Google is the industry leader of virtual media sourcing. We have proven we know that if you architect efficiently then you may also e-enable iteravely. The obfuscation management factor is integrated. Without preplanned models, e-tailers are forced to become sexy. The metrics for nano-social-network-based magnetic, reality-based turn-key, real-world R&D are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a holistic strategy for regulating unplanned-for biometrics? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our power to expedite without decrementing our ability to visualize. What does the term "frictionless Total Quality Control" really mean? Google practically invented the term "structuring". The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We constantly optimize value-added ultra-CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! It seems astonishing, but it's 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? Think intra-customer-defined. We will utilize the buzzword "holistic". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. A company that can iterate courageously will (eventually) be able to incentivize fiercely. Google has permanently altered the concept of e-services. We think we know that if you deploy extensibly then you may also reintermediate vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize proactively than to revolutionize holistically. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our nano-virally-distributed R&D metrics but our capacity to seize. We realize that if you whiteboard iteravely then you may also scale wirelessly. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Without well-planned systems, methodologies are forced to become revolutionary. We have come to know that if you engineer iteravely then you may also generate extensibly. We usually scale bricks-and-clicks interfaces. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things!