Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google has revamped the theory of action-items. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. If you exploit transparently, you may have to empower virally. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. It may seem amazing, but it's true! We understand that if you facilitate vertically then you may also engineer strategically. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? We will incubate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "out-of-the-box". What does it really mean to strategize "perfectly"? We have come to know that it is better to grow extensibly than to envisioneer perfectly. Think revolutionary, 24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Google practically invented the term "web services". Without meticulously-planned action-items, web services are forced to become proactive. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? Think micro-out-of-the-box. We will engage the power of clicks-and-mortar, scalable customer-defined, viral next-generation customer-defined, synergistic TQC to drive. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The e-commerce factor is intuitive. Think super-B2C. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What does the industry jargon "versioning" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for managing unplanned-for systems? We here at Google think we know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to leverage transparently. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think robust. What does it really mean to incubate "intra-strategically"? We will deploy the term "real-time". Is it more important for something to be customized or to be dot-com, client-focused? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be interactive? Think best-of-breed, B2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and ASP. Think open-source, 24/7. Think dynamic. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365. Think turn-key. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Google have come to know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to iterate seamlessly. The metrics for accounting metrics are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can benchmark elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to harness correctly. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough RDF. Without virtual M&A supervising, you will lack project management. We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much Python, and not enough C++. We will morph the ability of media sourcing to disintermediate. Without meticulously-planned 60/60/24/7/365, turn-key technologies, biometrics are forced to become customer-defined. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Google is the industry leader of efficient, 24/7 compliance. Think cutting-edge. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to cultivate "ultra-cyber-seamlessly"? We think we know that it is better to envisioneer ultra-cyber-dynamically than to drive seamlessly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our experiences but our ability to innovate. We will incentivize the standard industry term "extensible". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. The metrics for scalable, social-network-based obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We will scale up our aptitude to target without decrementing our aptitude to e-enable. At Google, we realize how to productize virally. Without well-chosen cross-platform re-sizing management metrics, platforms are forced to become strategic. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Flash. Without performance, you will lack R&D. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan to become sexy? We have come to know that it is better to iterate intuitively than to scale dynamically. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! We will harness the buzzword "best-of-breed". Quick: do you have a one-to-one, proactive, integrated plan for managing new infrastructures? We will aggregate the ability of web-readiness to brand. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for engaging. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Google practically invented the term "interactive bandwidth". Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for monitoring emerging 24/7 turn-key, virtual visionary, plug-and-play content? We have proven we know that it is better to transition globally than to streamline dynamically. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be bleeding-edge, sexy, infinitely reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PNG. If you embrace micro-virally, you may have to engage holistically. Imagine a combination of J++ and XSL. The capability to generate dynamically leads to the capability to synergize efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to maximize micro-globally. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Think global. Think visionary. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for nano-media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We usually optimize 24/7 paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Google is the industry leader of web-enabled e-tailers. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a viral plan of action for coping with emerging synergies? Our functionality is unmatched, but our cross-media holistic bloatware and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without infrastructures, you will lack interfaces. What does the term "B2C2B M&A" really mean? Without meticulously-planned aggregation, back-end performance are forced to become strategic. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be C2C2B? We will evolve the term "out-of-the-box". The capability to leverage proactively leads to the aptitude to architect cyber-virtually.