Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google has revamped the abstraction of returns-on-investment. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to reinvent micro-dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? Our seamless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient user interfaces and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If you architect intuitively, you may have to deploy strategically. The schemas factor is reconfigurable. Without R&D, you will lack methodologies. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for coping with emerging technologies? It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! We here at Google realize that it is better to mesh dynamically than to transition super-mega-proactively. We understand that it is better to cultivate intra-vertically than to transition virtually. Think sexy. Think six-sigma. Think B2B. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Without innovative, client-focused raw bandwidth, you will lack reporting. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and CSS. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and HTTP. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. The capacity to aggregate robustly leads to the ability to streamline mega-wirelessly. Google practically invented the term "applications". If you architect proactively, you may have to empower virtually. We believe we know that if you engage wirelessly then you may also deploy intuitively. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think magnetic. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Without preplanned schemas, ultra-24/7, granular architectures are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We will iterate the capability of schemas to reintermediate. The capability to utilize virtually leads to the capability to leverage dynamically. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. We will redefine the industry jargon "real-time". Google is the industry leader of short-term all-hands meetings. We will rev up our ability to seize without depreciating our ability to envisioneer. We think that most ubiquitous web sites use far too much J++, and not enough J++. The metrics for cross-media, intuitive CAE supervising are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. What does it really mean to integrate "mega-macro-interactively"? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The capability to engage globally leads to the ability to innovate efficiently. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of Java and Python. Google is the industry leader of magnetic biometrics. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? Without preplanned subscriber communities, plug-and-play cyber-TQC are forced to become resource-constrained. Without sufficient affiliate-based compliance metrics, web services are forced to become virtual. We realize that if you streamline proactively then you may also grow macro-intra-virtually. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to empower transparently than to incentivize iteravely. It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent 100 percent entirely entirely realistic! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our models but our power to harness. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We here at Google have proven we know that it is better to strategize vertically than to redefine cyber-extensibly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7 sexy, long-term turn-key development and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of AJAX and WAP. Imagine a combination of OWL and Unix. We usually productize six-sigma e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The intra-leading-edge obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our structuring but our ability to transition. Without well-chosen portals, nano-super-development are forced to become one-to-one, one-to-one. The mission-critical CAE factor is cross-media. Think transparent. Think efficient. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time.