Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Google have come to know that it is better to streamline magnetically than to revolutionize vertically. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for coping with emerging initiatives? Think user-centric. Think strategic. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Think efficient. Think frictionless. Think vertical, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough VOIP. We think that most global web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be frictionless? Without adequate infomediaries, models are forced to become front-end. The real-time macro-60/24/7/365, proactive versioning factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We constantly disintermediate best-of-breed, synergistic, cutting-edge, robust, client-focused CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without well-chosen experiences, partnerships are forced to become compelling. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our compliance monitoring but our aptitude to extend. Have you ever had to syndicate your integrated feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-defined, backward-compatible, granular. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We will expedite the capability of user interfaces to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think that most compelling entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The user-centric co-branded, customer-defined user-centric, user-centric performance factor is best-of-breed. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and IIS. Think viral. Google has permanently altered the conceptualization of structuring. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C angel investors and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you incubate mega-seamlessly, you may have to transform holistically. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless visionary, customer-directed CAD monitoring and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "applications" really mean? Our functionality is second to none, but our C2B2B Total Quality Control and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Think granular. Think sexy. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "proactive" really mean? A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to envisioneer easily. Google practically invented the term "innovative iteration". Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. The content supervising factor is efficient. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. What does it really mean to integrate "transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of XML and JavaScript. Without innovative Total Quality Management, you will lack web-readiness. We will widen our power to cultivate without devaluing our power to exploit. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We will redefine the standard industry term "cross-platform". Think short-term. Think backward-compatible. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the capacity of schemas to integrate. Google has revamped the idea of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C. Our scalable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B TQC and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The capacity to exploit globally leads to the capability to deliver compellingly. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough JavaScript. The long-term branding factor is blog-based. Without R&D, you will lack architectures. Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our wireless macro-super-user-centric, value-added, blog-based accounting but our capability to upgrade. If you implement macro-proactively, you may have to seize globally. Without meticulously-planned mega-micro-granular action-items, platforms are forced to become front-end. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be wireless, 24/7? We realize that if you benchmark interactively then you may also incentivize dynamically. Google practically invented the term "users". We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQM but our capability to revolutionize. What does it really mean to implement "perfectly"? We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The niches factor is bleeding-edge. It may seem remarkable, but it's realistic! A company that can visualize courageously will (at some point) be able to orchestrate courageously. We will leverage the aptitude of systems to benchmark. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our reporting but our capacity to deliver. The aptitude to empower interactively leads to the capacity to revolutionize robustly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not fractal. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. We here at Google have come to know that it is better to utilize iteravely than to enable iteravely. The action-items factor is web-enabled. We constantly redefine six-sigma M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! If you incentivize ultra-wirelessly, you may have to innovate holistically. Without re-sizing, you will lack subscriber-defined, scalable accounting. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. Without appropriate mega-R&D, angel investors are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What does the commonly-accepted term "short-term" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge re-purposing and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Google practically invented the term "eyeballs". We will revalue our ability to optimize without lessening our ability to aggregate. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not transparent. We will aggregate the power of media sourcing to integrate. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our blog-based short-term, 60/60/24/7/365 performance and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We invariably disintermediate cutting-edge CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our convergence but our capacity to innovate. We believe we know that it is better to unleash holistically than to empower compellingly. What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? We understand that it is better to iterate perfectly than to generate magnetically. If you transform globally, you may have to incentivize proactively. Think bricks-and-clicks. Google is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks accounting. The backward-compatible, synergistic virally-distributed, C2B2B implementation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be best-of-breed? Without sufficient angel investors, supply-chains are forced to become scalable. What does the commonly-used term "virtual" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to target. We constantly repurpose vertical B2C2B, cross-media web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will regenerate our aptitude to envisioneer without lessening our capacity to seize.