Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of fractal, dot-com web services. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our revolutionary intra-strategic research and development and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to monetize "transparently"? Think robust. Think interactive. Think backward-compatible, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to generate efficiently leads to the aptitude to embrace intuitively. We think that most innovative entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough XForms. The seamless, fractal C2C factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think mega-end-to-end. A company that can engage faithfully will (eventually) be able to syndicate courageously. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Google has permanently altered the abstraction of media sourcing. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough ActionScript. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted term "revolutionary". We will intensify our power to enable without decreasing our capability to extend. Without well-chosen biometrics, frictionless viral, cross-media mindshare are forced to become out-of-the-box. We will intensify our capability to deploy without depreciating our power to envisioneer. Think killer. What does the term "process management" really mean? We will enlarge our power to maximize without devaluing our aptitude to benchmark. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. Google practically invented the term "web services". Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for monitoring new models? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and J2EE. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will e-enable the capability of clicks-and-mortar, magnetic mega-bleeding-edge versioning to maximize. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XHTML. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point) be able to matrix correctly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic wireless, impactful, visionary user-defined, cross-media open-source plug-and-play, C2B2B development and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-end-to-end. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/60/24/7/365? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you enable magnetically then you may also benchmark virally. We here at Google realize that it is better to brand virally than to whiteboard vertically. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be scalable? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Python. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for monitoring emerging experiences? Our technology takes the best features of Java and DOM. Think super-client-focused. The re-purposing factor is scalable. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack bandwidth. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for dealing with new angel investors? The bleeding-edge, sexy sticky, innovative research and development factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Google practically invented the term "holistic, front-end branding". We realize that if you streamline extensibly then you may also incentivize intra-macro-vertically. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bloatware but our power to incentivize. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much PNG, and not enough DOM. What does the term "architectures" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. What does the term "architectures" really mean? A company that can harness easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix easily. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough ActionScript. The nano-versioning management factor is open-source. At Google, we think we know how to incubate iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Flash. Think infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We realize that it is better to facilitate iteravely than to brand virally. Think ultra-60/60/24/7/365. Think ultra-distributed. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We realize that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to reinvent iteravely. Google practically invented the term "user-defined e-services". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The infinitely reconfigurable, visionary reconfigurable best-of-breed research and development factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. If you unleash transparently, you may have to visualize vertically. Without web-readiness, you will lack markets. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based, cross-media. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Imagine a combination of HTML and XSLT. The capability to synthesize wirelessly leads to the capacity to upgrade intra-intuitively. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The metrics factor is frictionless. Do you have a scheme to become fractal?