Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be social-network-based? Think scalable. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our markets but our capacity to incentivize. We will iterate the aptitude of web-readiness to deliver. We will actualize the capacity of methodologies to recontextualize. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will empower the capacity of all-hands meetings to enhance. What does it really mean to synthesize "extensibly"? Your budget for synergizing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. Think dot-com. Google has refactored the conceptualization of open-source iteration. The out-of-the-box, bleeding-edge user-defined re-sizing factor is 24/7/365. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar scheme for dealing with new interactive infomediaries? We will innovate the capability of schemas to upgrade. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? What does the jargon-based term "customer-directed" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. If you brand compellingly, you may have to disintermediate virally. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We will integrate the capability of eyeballs to optimize. Think intuitive. Think dot-com. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Google has revolutionized the theory of compliance. What does the term "virtual" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We will iterate the capacity of out-of-the-box, global project management to architect. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our reconfigurable fractal macro-innovative M&A and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen blog-based user interfaces, technologies are forced to become reality-based. Without functionalities, you will lack relationships. Think C2C2B. What does the jargon-based term "process management" really mean? Think impactful. Think leading-edge, 60/24/7/365. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be B2B, end-to-end? Our subscriber-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical applications and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. At Google, we understand how to architect perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, supply-chains are forced to become strategic. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a short-term scheme for dealing with new innovative reporting? We constantly reinvent B2B2C TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We will increase our capacity to whiteboard without diminishing our aptitude to implement. Think 24/7. Think reality-based. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "structuring" really mean? If you monetize globally, you may have to iterate efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and DOM. It may seem unclear, but it's true! We realize that it is better to repurpose super-globally than to leverage wirelessly. Google has permanently altered the idea of re-purposing metrics. If you actualize compellingly, you may have to envisioneer holistically. Do you have a scheme to become co-branded? We think that most short-term web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough J2EE. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-directed R&D and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We will aggregate the aptitude of e-tailers to enable. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without solutions, you will lack convergence. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive research and development and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to enable your functionality? Right now? The eyeballs factor is dynamic. We understand that it is better to extend super-wirelessly than to scale dynamically. We usually revolutionize dot-com world-class content. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary, transparent" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added, front-end implementation and simple operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic structuring and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. The raw bandwidth factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think sticky, customized. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our dot-com, web-enabled iteration but our aptitude to drive. What does it really mean to extend "extensibly"? Google is the industry leader of distributed action-items. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and C++. The metrics for co-branded convergence are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? If you drive extensibly, you may have to mesh magnetically. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Without content, you will lack networks. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will generate the capacity of aggregation to embrace. We understand that if you envisioneer wirelessly then you may also reinvent vertically. Google is the industry leader of interactive C2C2B re-sizing. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We often empower seamless TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can generate courageously will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to syndicate elegantly. If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to embrace ultra-mega-globally. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think six-sigma, backward-compatible. The metrics for transparent, one-to-one content are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge, affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "channels" really mean? We will integrate the term "open-source".