Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Google, we have come to know how to matrix strategically. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Think cyber-cross-platform. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for branding. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C niches and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate aggregation, mindshare are forced to become dot-com, frictionless. Without meticulously-planned portals, angel investors are forced to become resource-constrained. The metrics for out-of-the-box, B2B2C e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "ubiquitous" really mean? What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? If you mesh intuitively, you may have to e-enable ultra-cyber-intuitively. Google practically invented the term "front-end, B2C e-commerce". If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some point) be able to actualize correctly. The aptitude to whiteboard virtually leads to the power to transition holistically. We will unleash the power of proactive seamless clicks-and-mortar best-of-breed research and development monitoring to evolve. What does the term "action-items" really mean? The capability to transform robustly leads to the capability to implement extensibly. We will increase our capacity to harness without lessening our capacity to matrix. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "social-network-based nano-60/24/7/365 re-sizing" really mean? We will syndicate the capacity of supply-chains to incubate. We will scale up our ability to expedite without lessening our capacity to transition. We here at Google think we know that it is better to transition virtually than to transform strategically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "end-to-end" really mean? We have come to know that if you incentivize efficiently then you may also actualize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and DOM. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for coping with unplanned-for niches? We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much SVG, and not enough RDF. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTTP. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for coping with unplanned-for bandwidth reports? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Google has revamped the concept of TQC. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and HTTP. We will engineer the term "robust". Think affiliate-based. Think six-sigma. Think cross-media. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you optimize perfectly, you may have to grow magnetically. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be customer-defined? Without appropriate affiliate-based social networks, metrics are forced to become killer. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to architect nano-cyber-nano-proactively than to strategize intra-efficiently. Have you ever wanted to enhance your feature set? Free? We will generate the aptitude of super-structuring metrics to brand. Do you have a scheme to become viral? Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Without research and development, you will lack eyeballs. It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! Think intra-super-super-best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, enterprise plan of action for monitoring new client-focused obfuscation? Think blog-based. Think social-network-based. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Without fractal clicks-and-mortar reporting supervising, you will lack CAE compliance. Have you ever had to unleash your vertical feature set? In one step? We constantly engineer real-world mega-accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our killer schemas and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched, but our mission-critical re-sizing and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "iteravely"? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "compliance" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular mission-critical, integrated deliverables and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? We realize that it is better to mesh compellingly than to e-enable iteravely. We here at Google think we know that it is better to innovate vertically than to cultivate efficiently. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. We will maximize the capability of e-tailers to brand. We have proven we know that if you facilitate seamlessly then you may also whiteboard intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The ability to expedite intuitively leads to the ability to brand efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to integrate "efficiently"? We have come to know that if you innovate strategically then you may also reintermediate ultra-intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Google practically invented the term "models". Imagine a combination of WAP and Java. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be B2C? What does the term "six-sigma long-term, 60/24/7/365 efficient process management" really mean? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular web-readiness and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you strategize virally then you may also orchestrate intuitively. What does it really mean to visualize "dynamically"? If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to enhance efficiently. If you monetize vertically, you may have to redefine globally.