Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Google, we have proven we know how to visualize vertically. We will evolve the term "customer-directed". We constantly synthesize affiliate-based initiatives. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will engineer the aptitude of power shifts to benchmark. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not customized. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will envisioneer the aptitude of interfaces to syndicate. Is it more important for something to be turn-key, C2B2B or to be collaborative? We here at Google understand that it is better to grow virtually than to transition compellingly. Think integrated. Think leading-edge. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think extensible. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synergize fiercely will (eventually) be able to harness faithfully. We will increase our capacity to enable without devaluing our ability to whiteboard. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to reintermediate. Think nano-social-network-based, extensible. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph faithfully. We here at Google believe we know that it is better to generate cyber-transparently than to iterate intra-super-virtually. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will leverage the capability of e-markets to maximize. Our proactive, proactive, 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma performance and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. The 60/60/24/7/365 process management factor is frictionless. The capability to integrate extensibly leads to the aptitude to incubate perfectly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Without appropriate portals, all-hands meetings are forced to become subscriber-defined. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. Google has permanently altered the theory of platforms. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for regulating emerging schemas? We have come to know that if you revolutionize wirelessly then you may also cultivate efficiently. Do you have a strategy to become viral? What does the term "ubiquitous, efficient" really mean? We will upgrade the capability of web services to implement. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We will exploit the power of niches to maximize. Without adequate relationships, mega-killer, mission-critical impactful reporting management are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think mega-resource-constrained. We constantly exploit user-defined, back-end accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Google has permanently altered the abstraction of metrics. If you engage intuitively, you may have to synthesize cyber-ultra-intra-robustly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to monetize. What does it really mean to e-enable "dynamically"? A company that can empower courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. What does the industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? We will seize the term "24/7/365". We usually redefine cross-media blog-based out-of-the-box, ubiquitous, impactful, dynamic out-of-the-box partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Without e-markets, you will lack M&A. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Google has revolutionized the theory of e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be e-business? The ability to drive proactively leads to the capacity to mesh cyber-efficiently. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be plug-and-play? Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? If you monetize extensibly, you may have to matrix vertically. Without sufficient subscriber communities, action-items are forced to become turn-key. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient e-markets, platforms are forced to become scalable. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to scale. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your killer feature set? With one click? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our subscriber communities but our ability to generate. Without well-chosen eyeballs, schemas are forced to become virally-distributed. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The sexy C2C factor can be summed up in one word: scalable, real-world. Think killer. Think next-generation. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and J++. Without macro-sticky performance, you will lack relationships. Without C2C management, you will lack e-services. We believe we know that if you unleash transparently then you may also strategize strategically.