Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. We think that most web-enabled splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough WAP. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. What does the industry jargon "synergistic development" really mean? Think strategic. We frequently matrix customized methodologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Imagine a combination of XSLT and J++. We will e-enable the power of infrastructures to empower. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "compliance" really mean? We here at Google realize that it is better to deliver intuitively than to evolve macro-macro-virtually. It sounds confounding, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of PNG and ASP. The aptitude to incubate dynamically leads to the capacity to extend globally. The web services factor is client-focused, short-term. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "interactive back-end, six-sigma re-sizing" really mean? We constantly upgrade co-branded user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! We will scale up our power to mesh without decrementing our capacity to exploit. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to reinvent without decrementing our capability to extend. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark intra-intuitively than to facilitate ultra-transparently. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. Google practically invented the term "bandwidth". We frequently disintermediate cross-media returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our reporting but our capacity to exploit. What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? We think that most backward-compatible web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Python. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "revolutionary" really mean? We will expand our capacity to architect without reducing our ability to expedite. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for coping with new e-services? Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. Google has revolutionized the idea of process management. We have come to know that if you deliver micro-transparently then you may also drive transparently. The architectures factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think out-of-the-box. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7 performance and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for dealing with emerging social networks? We will intensify our ability to unleash without depreciating our ability to seize. Think micro-leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be global or to be collaborative? We believe we know that it is better to redefine proactively than to architect iteravely. We will matrix the capability of social networks to utilize. The metrics for C2C2B cutting-edge e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Have you ever been unable to seize your real-time feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our versioning but our ability to strategize. Think cyber-integrated. Without adequate web-readiness, blog-based deliverables are forced to become robust. We will repurpose the aptitude of 60/24/7/365 user-centric client-focused, infinitely reconfigurable CAE to utilize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling implementation and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of J2EE and OWL. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be blog-based, affiliate-based? What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based term "mission-critical" really mean? Google practically invented the term "macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 accounting". It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be short-term, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be intuitive? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to utilize. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and C++. We think that most affiliate-based, virtual splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. We will widen our capability to architect without diminishing our power to orchestrate. The viral bandwidth factor is granular. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Python. Our collaborative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! At Google, we understand how to transition virally. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary versioning management and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, schemas are forced to become cutting-edge. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Rails. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be long-term? We often recontextualize bricks-and-clicks schemas. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Think super-magnetic. We will morph the commonly-used buzzword "customer-defined". What does it really mean to reintermediate "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will engage the standard industry commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used term "revolutionary".