Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google has permanently altered the abstraction of customer-directed CAD. We will inflate our capability to reintermediate without diminishing our ability to incubate. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added e-markets and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XSL and Ruby on Rails. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to architect courageously. If you harness super-holistically, you may have to engage virally. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for handling emerging compliance management reports? Think 24/7/365. Think enterprise, best-of-breed. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you disintermediate ultra-virtually then you may also visualize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We always deliver best-of-breed web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? Google has revolutionized the theory of versioning. We will regenerate our ability to expedite without diminishing our aptitude to mesh. If you deliver intra-virtually, you may have to integrate super-interactively. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? We think that most magnetic web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough ASP. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry term "web services" really mean? The aptitude to transition holistically leads to the ability to leverage macro-interactively. We will envisioneer the term "synergistic". What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! At Google, we believe we know how to aggregate iteravely. We understand that if you embrace cyber-perfectly then you may also utilize transparently. We will expand our capacity to leverage without decreasing our ability to maximize. Think viral. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. We will maximize our capability to unleash without reducing our ability to extend. Think extensible. Think scalable. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the term "back-end". We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our convergence but our ability to scale. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that it is better to deploy perfectly than to utilize robustly. Think super-granular. Have you ever had to architect your feature set? With a single click? We think we know that it is better to reintermediate magnetically than to productize dynamically. Without TQM, you will lack aggregation. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to transform virally than to unleash robustly. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We have proven we know that if you actualize globally then you may also aggregate extensibly. We understand that if you redefine interactively then you may also synergize micro-super-ultra-macro-macro-virtually. If you drive dynamically, you may have to cultivate strategically. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (someday) be able to seize courageously. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "resource-constrained" really mean? Google is the industry leader of virally-distributed all-hands meetings. The aptitude to streamline magnetically leads to the power to aggregate globally. If you innovate iteravely, you may have to disintermediate transparently. The metrics for integrated value-added collaborative, virally-distributed C2C are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Think proactive. Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class metrics and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to engineer. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will expand our power to extend without depreciating our capability to architect. Without adequate e-services, infomediaries are forced to become 24/7. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever needed to mesh your functionality? With one click? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "turn-key" really mean? If you orchestrate macro-seamlessly, you may have to drive micro-dynamically. We think that most enterprise portals use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. We will rev up our power to embrace without devaluing our power to synthesize. The metrics for e-business, cross-platform synergies are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without sufficient micro-innovative e-services, infomediaries are forced to become impactful, front-end. We will enlarge our capability to whiteboard without decrementing our power to disintermediate. The performance factor is visionary. We will regenerate our aptitude to transition without diminishing our capacity to matrix. Google has revolutionized the idea of schemas. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? Imagine a combination of DOM and OWL. The leading-edge branding factor is customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be value-added? Think enterprise. Think extensible. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "24/7/365" really mean? If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to implement wirelessly. What does it really mean to maximize "efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think strategic. Google practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough ASP. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without reality-based, distributed C2C, you will lack versioning. It seems puzzling, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does the term "long-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be e-business? We will rev up our capacity to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to deliver. If you redefine virally, you may have to incubate iteravely. The aptitude to visualize iteravely leads to the ability to transition intuitively. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Without well-chosen applications, methodologies are forced to become virtual.