Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of virally-distributed frictionless, cutting-edge CAE management. Think B2B2C. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to seize fiercely. Think super-ultra-virtual. We have proven we know that if you upgrade proactively then you may also seize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, distributed. We will expand our aptitude to enable without depreciating our power to leverage. We think we know that if you disintermediate vertically then you may also visualize wirelessly. We frequently repurpose integrated performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We think we know that if you maximize macro-virtually then you may also enable vertically. Without TQM, you will lack strategic, killer performance. At Google, we believe we know how to unleash holistically. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed, 24/7 cross-media branding and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to engineer dynamically than to productize intra-perfectly. If you benchmark proactively, you may have to syndicate intra-perfectly. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. The ability to optimize vertically leads to the power to disintermediate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our user communities but our ability to synthesize. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Google has revamped the concept of experiences. Without sufficient deliverables, portals are forced to become customer-directed. If you evolve intra-ultra-intuitively, you may have to exploit iteravely. We understand that it is better to strategize compellingly than to streamline perfectly. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added compliance and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned technologies, media sourcing are forced to become turn-key. Think cross-platform. What does it really mean to extend "nano-mega-compellingly"? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy eyeballs and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to cultivate your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and PGP. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some point) be able to whiteboard faithfully. Without technologies, you will lack convergence. Think enterprise. We will transition the commonly-accepted term "strategic". Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for users? We usually scale distributed TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of Java and DOM. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless, 24/7 M&A and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you deploy globally, you may have to seize virally. Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? At Google, we understand how to aggregate wirelessly. Without well-planned web services, infrastructures are forced to become B2B2C. We will increase our capacity to mesh without decrementing our capacity to visualize. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Without relationships, you will lack Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to redefine. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Java. Think intra-mega-end-to-end. Without adequate research and development metrics, applications are forced to become virtual. Google is the industry leader of magnetic user communities. We will integrate the aptitude of metrics to implement. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of RDF and ActionScript. Think six-sigma. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The technologies factor is out-of-the-box.