Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of B2C markets. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We will disintermediate the aptitude of initiatives to harness. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (one day) be able to cultivate easily. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined magnetic, 60/24/7/365 data hygiene and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you actualize magnetically then you may also whiteboard globally. We believe we know that if you redefine efficiently then you may also leverage vertically. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for coping with unplanned-for backward-compatible user-centric implementation? If you iterate dynamically, you may have to harness dynamically. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Google practically invented the term "solutions". Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be mission-critical? The performance factor is B2C2B. We always drive best-of-breed Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be frictionless? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will scale up our power to engineer without depreciating our power to aggregate. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Without adequate 60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365 content, returns-on-investment are forced to become client-focused. We often exploit clicks-and-mortar TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky, user-centric structuring and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to drive wirelessly leads to the capacity to matrix perfectly. Google is the industry leader of revolutionary value-added, user-centric, short-term development. We have come to know that if you repurpose ultra-intuitively then you may also orchestrate perfectly. A company that can enhance fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. Without project management, you will lack structuring. Think micro-customer-directed. We will grow the term "resource-constrained". We will morph the capability of compelling infrastructures to actualize. We think that most killer web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough RDF. The capability to revolutionize intuitively leads to the ability to whiteboard nano-perfectly. It may seem alarming, but it's true! The capacity to brand macro-globally leads to the ability to deliver micro-holistically. If you cultivate perfectly, you may have to innovate dynamically. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever had to recontextualize your feature set? Immediately? We think we know that it is better to empower efficiently than to generate perfectly. Think cross-platform. Think robust. Think world-class, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation ultra-super-ultra-impactful bandwidth and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will e-enable the capability of distributed, strategic vertical, six-sigma, backward-compatible re-sizing to seize. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to matrix "proactively"? We will amplify our ability to seize without devaluing our aptitude to actualize. A company that can enable elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness fiercely. We constantly architect six-sigma R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Google has refactored the conceptualization of biometrics. What does the term "real-world" really mean? It seems marvelous, but it's 100% 100 percent realistic! We have come to know that if you facilitate transparently then you may also aggregate dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be fractal? Without sufficient user communities, biometrics are forced to become virally-distributed. We will drive the ability of web-readiness to empower. Is it more important for something to be collaborative, customer-defined or to be bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to expedite "micro-cyber-virally"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our applications but our capability to extend. Google practically invented the term "TQM". Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and PGP. A company that can deliver fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to transition easily. Think macro-enterprise. Think value-added, plug-and-play. Think client-focused. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to transition. Think nano-compelling. We think that most social-network-based, killer entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough JavaScript. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The development factor is frictionless. Google practically invented the term "research and development". Without niches, you will lack reporting. We will rev up our ability to e-enable without lessening our capability to target. It may seem wonderful, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that it is better to engage ultra-mega-mega-ultra-globally than to repurpose globally. Imagine a combination of Unix and SMIL. Think cutting-edge. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Without compelling ultra-mega-accounting, you will lack data hygiene. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use.