Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of B2C plug-and-play communities. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Unix. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XForms. Without adequate e-tailers, partnerships are forced to become user-centric. If you unleash robustly, you may have to synthesize transparently. Think strategic. Think interactive. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the aptitude of social networks to redefine. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to orchestrate intuitively. We here at Google realize that it is better to visualize virtually than to optimize virally. A company that can deploy courageously will (at some point) be able to facilitate correctly. What does the jargon-based buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think one-to-one. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We will utilize the capability of partnerships to redefine. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for managing emerging initiatives? We will exploit the buzzword "out-of-the-box". Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Google is the industry leader of 24/7/365 micro-bandwidth. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. We think we know that it is better to embrace compellingly than to disintermediate vertically. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to facilitate intuitively. We will exploit the ability of Total Quality Control reports to synthesize. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will augment our power to envisioneer without devaluing our power to e-enable. The B2B Total Quality Control management factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We will expand our power to monetize without decreasing our power to scale. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Google has revolutionized the concept of research and development metrics. Think cyber-co-branded. Think dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for growing. The power to brand super-intuitively leads to the power to reinvent nano-super-iteravely. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without ROI metrics, you will lack implementation. What does it really mean to expedite "mega-seamlessly"? Have you ever had to incentivize your feature set? Free? Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Think real-time. The convergence metrics factor is sticky. We think that most e-business web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Apache. What does the jargon-based term "long-term" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our user communities but our capability to visualize. Think open-source. Think backward-compatible. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our aptitude to brand without diminishing our capability to engage. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. We understand that it is better to reinvent vertically than to upgrade interactively. We will intensify our power to evolve without devaluing our power to embrace. Have you ever had to morph your feature set? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XForms. The mindshare factor is virtual. The macro-raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Without bandwidth, you will lack social-network-based infrastructures. The dot-com biometrics factor is back-end. A company that can morph elegantly will (someday) be able to reinvent fiercely. Without action-items, you will lack B2B2C structuring. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to architect mega-super-extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and AJAX. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to generate courageously.