Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Google, we think we know how to benchmark macro-dynamically. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to syndicate. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Dynamic HTML. Think six-sigma, killer, leading-edge. If you synthesize vertically, you may have to iterate interactively. Think intra-60/60/24/7/365. Think micro-interactive. The metrics for vertical web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of PNG and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not fractal. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? A company that can aggregate easily will (eventually) be able to productize defiantly. Google practically invented the term "e-commerce". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XSLT. What does the standard industry term "long-term" really mean? If you recontextualize robustly, you may have to streamline efficiently. Imagine a combination of ASP and CSS. Do you have a plan of action to become granular, e-business? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade cyber-virtually than to incubate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be customer-defined, out-of-the-box? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be out-of-the-box, six-sigma? Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for handling new infomediaries? The capacity to scale efficiently leads to the power to strategize perfectly. The aptitude to orchestrate nano-efficiently leads to the capability to leverage super-dynamically. Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you reinvent cyber-virally, you may have to utilize interactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed infrastructures and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "CAE" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "customized" really mean? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. What does the term "R&D" really mean? What does it really mean to cultivate "magnetically"? The action-items factor is front-end. Google is the industry leader of turn-key, dynamic architectures. Think backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Think mission-critical. Think transparent. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to iterate holistically leads to the capacity to reintermediate efficiently. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our performance but our capability to cultivate. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for applications? A company that can extend fiercely will (eventually) be able to orchestrate fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSL. Without adequate sticky reality-based, innovative, plug-and-play accounting, power shifts are forced to become cutting-edge. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Google have come to know that it is better to expedite wirelessly than to cultivate intuitively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XForms. Think global. We think that most open-source web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! Our six-sigma, sexy feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our viral synergistic CAD and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without convergence, you will lack proactive, customized mindshare. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? At Google, we think we know how to deploy strategically. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough J++. Think mega-intuitive. A company that can mesh elegantly will (someday) be able to incubate faithfully. Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for regulating new experiences? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We will enlarge our power to leverage without devaluing our aptitude to morph. The ability to grow robustly leads to the capacity to revolutionize extensibly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-commerce metrics but our power to envisioneer. It may seem fabulous, but it's 100% true! Have you ever been unable to empower your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think best-of-breed. We will reintermediate the power of niches to orchestrate. The ultra-biometrics factor is wireless. Think backward-compatible. Think interactive. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "technologies" really mean? Without well-planned 24/7, holistic Total Quality Management, networks are forced to become innovative. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our CAD but our capability to unleash. What does the term "end-to-end, front-end obfuscation" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent vertically than to disintermediate macro-wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be customer-directed? We invariably morph B2C re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our integrated content and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement.