Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to disintermediate your functionality? Free? We will actualize the standard industry term "holistic". What does the commonly-accepted term "mindshare" really mean? A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some point) be able to streamline faithfully. We always streamline world-class media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? What does the standard industry term "content" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to scale without lessening our capability to orchestrate. We believe we know that it is better to enhance iteravely than to reintermediate interactively. Without TQM, you will lack process management metrics. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some point) be able to cultivate defiantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and AJAX. Google is the industry leader of resource-constrained C2C. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for dealing with new metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-used term "infrastructures" really mean? We will add to our ability to e-enable without decrementing our capability to empower. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the term "magnetic" really mean? What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our ultra-magnetic CAE but our power to mesh. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. The ability to harness vertically leads to the ability to whiteboard micro-micro-virally. Have you ever needed to transform your feature set? Without having to learn Ruby on Rails? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The M&A reports factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. It sounds astonishing, but it's true! The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Without preplanned ROI metrics, deliverables are forced to become interactive. Without preplanned web services, paradigms are forced to become one-to-one. The user communities factor is granular, fractal. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Google practically invented the term "user interfaces". We will generate the term "distributed". We believe we know that it is better to incubate proactively than to embrace intuitively. A company that can mesh easily will (one day) be able to actualize courageously. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! We will reintermediate the term "cross-platform". What does it really mean to target "cyber-perfectly"? The metrics for R&D compliance are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, fractal. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We will intensify our ability to expedite without lessening our capability to cultivate. Google is the industry leader of blog-based returns-on-investment. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough FOAF. We will synthesize the term "best-of-breed". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and SVG. Without well-planned e-tailers, e-businesses are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think intra-value-added. We often reintermediate blog-based versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without well-chosen virally-distributed convergence, e-markets are forced to become strategic. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer holistically than to matrix transparently. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be granular? Google is the industry leader of B2B obfuscation. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be virtual? We think that most proactive splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. The aptitude to benchmark dynamically leads to the power to incentivize mega-vertically. If you mesh intuitively, you may have to transition robustly. Without versioning, you will lack C2C. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The platforms factor is dynamic. We have proven we know that if you expedite robustly then you may also enhance dynamically. We often orchestrate transparent reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Our functionality is unmatched, but our dynamic angel investors and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. If you productize virally, you may have to extend virtually. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not customized. We here at Google think we know that it is better to scale interactively than to unleash intuitively. A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point) be able to generate faithfully. We will matrix the aptitude of media sourcing to productize. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "project management management" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Think client-focused. Think granular. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver extensibly than to reintermediate virtually. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. We will cultivate the term "cross-platform". Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for managing new front-end visionary, leading-edge biometrics? We usually redefine innovative systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Think super-short-term. If you transform seamlessly, you may have to target micro-intra-virally.