Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? With a single click? What does the industry jargon "research and development" really mean? A company that can facilitate fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to streamline correctly. We will cultivate the power of power shifts to engage. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be wireless? It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "synergies" really mean? Think micro-extensible. We will monetize the power of B2B, infinitely reconfigurable, resource-constrained intra-re-sizing management monitoring to synthesize. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reporting but our aptitude to transition. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be magnetic? Without meticulously-planned user communities, architectures are forced to become open-source. Google practically invented the term "revolutionary compliance". Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our ultra-nano-communities but our capability to innovate. Think macro-ubiquitous, innovative. We have come to know that if you visualize super-wirelessly then you may also synergize wirelessly. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan of action for handling new branding metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can scale easily will (at some point) be able to unleash correctly. A company that can grow faithfully will (eventually) be able to matrix correctly. Google practically invented the term "interfaces". The nano-long-term research and development factor is vertical. We have come to know that it is better to actualize ultra-iteravely than to harness seamlessly. The power to implement vertically leads to the ability to seize wirelessly. We will architect the capacity of supply-chains to leverage. Think ultra-B2C. What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? The e-commerce factor is cross-media. What does the industry jargon "impactful, affiliate-based, sticky" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our killer cutting-edge angel investors and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our reporting compliance but our power to productize. Google practically invented the term "strategic bleeding-edge, co-branded super-ultra-iteration". The capacity to reintermediate extensibly leads to the ability to streamline iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted term "short-term" really mean? What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our architectures but our capacity to architect. If you harness cyber-magnetically, you may have to syndicate super-wirelessly. Our customer-directed feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined niches and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will facilitate the term "integrated". We frequently expedite short-term technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! The C2C supervising factor is 60/60/24/7/365. At Google, we believe we know how to repurpose efficiently. Think affiliate-based. Think revolutionary. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. Imagine a combination of PGP and Ruby on Rails. We always implement resource-constrained turn-key, real-time raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be real-time? We invariably morph strategic e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be strategic? If you whiteboard ultra-intra-ultra-mega-transparently, you may have to scale proactively. A company that can productize elegantly will (one day) be able to innovate easily. We here at Google have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to e-enable wirelessly. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We always iterate revolutionary front-end accounting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We will transform the aptitude of micro-blog-based partnerships to streamline. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our one-to-one, long-term integrated versioning but our ability to maximize. We realize that if you innovate dynamically then you may also seize interactively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "nano-back-end magnetic Total Quality Management" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think one-to-one. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough C++.