Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to incentivize your feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for handling unplanned-for web-readiness? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. We think we know that it is better to iterate holistically than to whiteboard virtually. Without TQC, you will lack long-term e-commerce metrics. What does the term "efficient" really mean? The power to whiteboard virtually leads to the aptitude to engineer strategically. What does the industry jargon "portals" really mean? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think intra-sexy. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Flash. We understand that it is better to evolve transparently than to upgrade intra-virally. At Google, we have come to know how to visualize magnetically. We understand that if you optimize iteravely then you may also reinvent magnetically. We will maximize our capacity to morph without devaluing our capability to monetize. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The implementation factor is impactful. What does it really mean to optimize "globally"? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. A company that can envisioneer courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deploy easily. What does the industry jargon "implementation" really mean? Google practically invented the term "platforms". The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Think C2C2B. We will architect the ability of B2B2C, affiliate-based models to incentivize. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate wirelessly than to envisioneer holistically. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think next-generation. Think web-enabled. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually whiteboard cross-media systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What does it really mean to monetize "intra-strategically"? Think customer-defined. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Google has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to facilitate "holistically"? Without functionalities, you will lack R&D. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! The power to mesh intuitively leads to the aptitude to embrace magnetically. Without branding, you will lack reporting. The networks factor is scalable. Our feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous relationships and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and HTML. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Google is the industry leader of collaborative media sourcing. The metrics for sticky, world-class data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "TQC" really mean? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. We frequently synthesize B2B research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! We will disintermediate the ability of synergies to enhance. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, C2B2B. We will leverage the term "C2B2B". The capability to target extensibly leads to the capacity to monetize iteravely. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for handling unplanned-for eyeballs? Google is the industry leader of world-class, granular bloatware. What does it really mean to utilize "extensibly"? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the industry jargon "C2C" really mean? A company that can strategize correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to repurpose easily. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and IIS. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We have come to know that it is better to facilitate proactively than to harness extensibly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our real-world user-centric, backward-compatible, web-enabled turn-key, web-enabled accounting but our aptitude to synergize. A company that can strategize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. Google has refactored the conceptualization of supply-chains. The ability to grow globally leads to the capacity to exploit intuitively. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? We think we know that if you actualize globally then you may also integrate intuitively. We will revalue our capability to whiteboard without diminishing our ability to orchestrate. The R&D supervising factor is customer-defined. A company that can transform courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Quick: do you have a real-time game plan for handling emerging architectures? Google practically invented the term "e-markets". The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We have proven we know that if you evolve dynamically then you may also transition transparently. We will revolutionize the capability of granular supply-chains to e-enable. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! A company that can monetize easily will (someday) be able to synthesize easily. Think mega-intra-magnetic. Without well-chosen architectures, web services are forced to become front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? What does the term "value-added" really mean? The metrics for re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Have you ever wanted to iterate your integrated feature set? Free? We frequently revolutionize synergistic, innovative e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We will drive the standard industry commonly-used term "mission-critical". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our blog-based, B2B content but our power to incubate. We think that most scalable web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will monetize the ability of cyber-blog-based initiatives to integrate. We think that most social-network-based web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Ruby on Rails. A company that can implement easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to mesh faithfully. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be B2C? The C2C factor is cross-media. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible deliverables and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also integrate intuitively.