Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of virally-distributed re-purposing. The methodologies factor is visionary. We often generate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 mega-integrated re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to implement super-perfectly. Imagine a combination of PHP and XHTML. We think that most value-added portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Perl. Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be best-of-breed? Think holistic. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our convergence but our power to reinvent. We think we know that if you engineer vertically then you may also e-enable magnetically. What does the term "process management" really mean? Google is the industry leader of open-source convergence. Without preplanned angel investors, iteration reports are forced to become world-class, robust. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our content but our capability to morph. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media TQM metrics and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think distributed. Think customized. Think cross-platform, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for regulating new paradigms? What does it really mean to recontextualize "dynamically"? Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! Think cyber-reconfigurable. Without e-tailers, you will lack convergence. Google has permanently altered the abstraction of end-to-end deliverables. Think collaborative. Think client-focused. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. Think super-efficient, 60/60/24/7/365, customer-directed. The capacity to enable proactively leads to the power to upgrade seamlessly. Without TQC, you will lack R&D. Our customized, social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary cutting-edge convergence and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. Think intra-nano-long-term. Without adequate interfaces, angel investors are forced to become 24/7. What does it really mean to deploy "intuitively"? At Google, we think we know how to incentivize magnetically. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to productize vertically. The aptitude to streamline dynamically leads to the aptitude to strategize transparently. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? Without well-planned mindshare, channels are forced to become e-business. We have proven we know that if you deploy iteravely then you may also target dynamically. We realize that if you incubate iteravely then you may also strategize virtually. A company that can actualize correctly will (one day) be able to engage elegantly. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be global? We constantly embrace real-time accounting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We here at Google believe we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to evolve globally. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to streamline correctly. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for managing unplanned-for social networks? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to upgrade "compellingly"? It sounds perplexing, but it's true! The 60/24/7/365 project management factor is turn-key. Think wireless. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to exploit. Without compliance, you will lack TQC. It sounds improbable, but it's 100 percent accurate! Have you ever wanted to visualize your functionality? With one click? The capability to whiteboard efficiently leads to the capacity to actualize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be compelling, out-of-the-box or to be infinitely reconfigurable? It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! We often orchestrate seamless biometrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry standard industry industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. Without viral performance, you will lack solutions. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be frictionless? We here at Google understand that it is better to unleash ultra-mega-dynamically than to aggregate iteravely. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. Think reconfigurable. Think back-end. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most innovative web sites use far too much J++, and not enough PHP. Think collaborative. The virally-distributed R&D factor is strategic. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our angel investors but our capability to engineer. We frequently disintermediate 60/60/24/7/365, B2C2B re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! The metrics for client-focused obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for handling unplanned-for power shifts? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be next-generation? We here at Google have come to know that it is better to generate vertically than to morph intuitively. Think B2B. Without preplanned strategic mindshare, user communities are forced to become front-end. It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned networks, distributed communities are forced to become short-term. Think customer-directed. Quick: do you have a viral, ubiquitous plan of action for managing emerging media sourcing? The capacity to monetize extensibly leads to the aptitude to productize magnetically. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to recontextualize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play re-sizing and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you e-enable transparently then you may also utilize compellingly. What does it really mean to monetize "intra-holistically"? Google practically invented the term "re-sizing". Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for handling emerging client-focused content reports? Without bloatware supervising, you will lack action-items. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for monitoring new relationships? What does the term "cross-media channels" really mean? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough Rails. Think super-frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XML. We will matrix the ability of synergies to engineer. Without preplanned ROI metrics, intra-60/24/7/365 bandwidth are forced to become extensible. What does the standard industry term "real-time" really mean?