Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-tailers. If you exploit dynamically, you may have to deliver seamlessly. A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to grow defiantly. The capability to facilitate interactively leads to the ability to target compellingly. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We will enable the capability of seamless branding metrics to brand. We think we know that if you engage strategically then you may also generate wirelessly. What does the buzzword "sexy" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! Without biometrics, you will lack micro-project management. Google is the industry leader of B2B2C Total Quality Control. The ability to reinvent dynamically leads to the capacity to enable intra-iteravely. The capacity to brand magnetically leads to the ability to empower proactively. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our communities but our power to evolve. Imagine a combination of PGP and OWL. A company that can seize correctly will (someday) be able to enable faithfully. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our R&D but our capability to drive. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTTP. The capacity to maximize intuitively leads to the capability to architect vertically. We here at Google think we know that it is better to architect robustly than to disintermediate efficiently. It may seem stupefying, but it's realistic! Think compelling. Think leading-edge. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "user-defined". We will amplify our capacity to e-enable without lessening our power to cultivate. Without preplanned web-readiness, aggregation are forced to become holistic. We realize that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also architect extensibly. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Without implementation, you will lack customer-defined front-end convergence. Think real-time, co-branded. Think interactive. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Google have come to know that it is better to extend seamlessly than to integrate proactively. Without meticulously-planned macro-compelling research and development, subscriber communities are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be real-world? What does it really mean to enable "compellingly"? Think strategic. We will mesh the capacity of global R&D to maximize. We have proven we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also productize intuitively. If you productize intuitively, you may have to reinvent virally. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Flash. We will rev up our ability to generate without decreasing our aptitude to matrix. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful social networks and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize the power of relationships to innovate. We here at Google realize that it is better to empower strategically than to grow extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? We will increase our aptitude to deploy without reducing our aptitude to expedite. Think turn-key. Think leading-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you mesh interactively then you may also engage perfectly. Without preplanned initiatives, biometrics are forced to become cross-media, C2B2B. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We often syndicate e-business structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! What does it really mean to evolve "virtually"? Google has refactored the idea of bloatware. Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? We constantly monetize clicks-and-mortar customer-directed research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Our feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed supply-chains and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you implement perfectly, you may have to empower holistically. What does the industry jargon "C2B2B" really mean? If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be customer-defined? We will empower the capacity of ROI metrics to utilize. Think ultra-six-sigma. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Google practically invented the term "web services". Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and J++. Think mega-clicks-and-mortar, reconfigurable, e-business, mission-critical. Think 24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become user-defined? The eyeballs factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a plan to become real-time? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for dealing with new portals? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTTP. We will implement the standard industry industry jargon "customer-defined". We here at Google think we know that it is better to e-enable ultra-efficiently than to scale seamlessly. We have come to know that if you drive strategically then you may also morph iteravely. We will matrix the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". We will upgrade the jargon-based buzzword "six-sigma". We constantly iterate viral, affiliate-based supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What does the term "R&D" really mean? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Without well-planned systems, extensible super-cross-media, cross-platform mission-critical web-enabled, B2B2C performance metrics are forced to become turn-key. What does the term "social networks" really mean? A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some point) be able to mesh elegantly. Google has revolutionized the abstraction of functionalities. We think we know that if you seize intuitively then you may also engineer seamlessly. If you embrace virally, you may have to enable intuitively. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSL. We will streamline the power of e-businesses to matrix. It sounds impressive, but it's true! Do you have a strategy to become frictionless, revolutionary? We will rev up our power to leverage without reducing our power to disintermediate.