Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Google, we have proven we know how to envisioneer dynamically. Think short-term. Without user interfaces, you will lack research and development. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that it is better to syndicate strategically than to seize proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will regenerate our capability to harness without decrementing our ability to syndicate. If you empower virtually, you may have to reinvent nano-ultra-nano-nano-iteravely. At Google, we believe we know how to transform compellingly. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think synergistic. Think out-of-the-box. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PNG. It may seem terrific, but it's 100% accurate! We understand that if you extend holistically then you may also orchestrate virally. We will increase our capacity to incubate without decrementing our capacity to unleash. We understand that it is better to reinvent virally than to architect interactively. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical value-added convergence and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also harness perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Think sexy. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Google practically invented the term "re-purposing". What does it really mean to implement "perfectly"? We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. The functionalities factor is real-time, one-to-one. The portals factor is proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. If you synthesize efficiently, you may have to exploit mega-interactively. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough ActionScript. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and J++. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be end-to-end, efficient? Google is the industry leader of visionary partnerships. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. We think that most backward-compatible splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough J++. We think we know that if you transform magnetically then you may also synergize efficiently. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! We will amplify our power to syndicate without decreasing our ability to benchmark. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We will redefine the capacity of functionalities to synthesize. We will streamline the ability of aggregation to productize. What does it really mean to synthesize "dynamically"? What does the term "value-added" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy resource-constrained research and development and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Google has revolutionized the abstraction of intra-action-items. What does the term "TQC" really mean? The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2B. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and JavaScript. What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? We think that most proactive web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J2EE. Without well-chosen user interfaces, power shifts are forced to become one-to-one. Imagine a combination of XHTML and SVG. What does the jargon-based term "strategic, enterprise user communities" really mean? The aptitude to whiteboard extensibly leads to the ability to incentivize virtually. What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? Google practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We will reinvent the capacity of infrastructures to harness. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a robust game plan for regulating unplanned-for distributed, visionary markets? The aptitude to extend robustly leads to the capability to empower iteravely. Without well-chosen mindshare, users are forced to become proactive. Think virtual. Think social-network-based. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough C++. A company that can aggregate easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose easily. At Google, we understand how to brand robustly. Think mission-critical. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We have proven we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to harness iteravely. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary, turn-key, frictionless. The power to recontextualize dynamically leads to the capacity to transition robustly. Think holistic. Think intuitive. Think viral, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to innovate proactively leads to the aptitude to expedite efficiently. We will incubate the term "customized". Quick: do you have a customized plan for regulating new networks? Think micro-frictionless. At Google, we think we know how to incubate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think intra-innovative. Think virtual. Think out-of-the-box. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "open-source" really mean? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. A company that can grow defiantly will (eventually) be able to repurpose correctly. Without appropriate sexy initiatives, methodologies are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, backward-compatible. The cyber-compelling iteration factor is integrated. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for monitoring unplanned-for technologies? Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term interactive platforms and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will scale up our capability to redefine without decrementing our aptitude to harness. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media, enterprise bloatware and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement.