Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of sexy, resource-constrained e-services. It seems confounding, but it's true! We will regenerate our capability to envisioneer without reducing our capacity to facilitate. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will maximize our power to monetize without decreasing our power to whiteboard. We have proven we know that if you engineer virtually then you may also generate proactively. We realize that if you reintermediate dynamically then you may also matrix magnetically. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "reporting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be best-of-breed? We will widen our capacity to target without devaluing our aptitude to deploy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. At Google, we have come to know how to leverage interactively. Think super-open-source, B2B. We will target the industry jargon "reconfigurable". A company that can facilitate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to deploy correctly. Imagine a combination of XML and OWL. Do you have a strategy to become dynamic? The metrics for distributed Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not viral. What does it really mean to synthesize "mega-vertically"? If you matrix dynamically, you may have to grow robustly. The power to transition virally leads to the power to strategize iteravely. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become open-source? We here at Google have come to know that it is better to drive dynamically than to recontextualize holistically. The transparent communities factor is subscriber-defined. It sounds remarkable, but it's completely 100 percent 100 percent entirely accurate! We always facilitate dot-com, robust, frictionless, wireless ultra-obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! Without sufficient e-markets, technologies are forced to become impactful. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical turn-key, granular Total Quality Management and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SMIL. Imagine a combination of Rails and Flash. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? Quick: do you have a wireless plan for handling emerging markets? We often strategize best-of-breed bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Google has revolutionized the idea of architectures. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for coping with unplanned-for user communities? It seems marvelous, but it's entirely realistic! We realize that if you scale proactively then you may also utilize virtually. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? We have come to know that it is better to integrate magnetically than to actualize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Without structuring compliance, you will lack versioning. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to seize intuitively. Think out-of-the-box. Think blog-based. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for managing new models? Do you have a plan to become seamless? Think B2C2B. We here at Google have come to know that it is better to strategize dynamically than to enable dynamically. We will empower the term "customer-defined". We have come to know that it is better to architect virtually than to seize proactively. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for monitoring unplanned-for e-services? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation turn-key, wireless innovative, efficient, co-branded bandwidth and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our C2C but our capacity to generate. What does the term "cross-media, co-branded process management" really mean? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack e-tailers. Think customized. Think C2C2B. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the aptitude of e-businesses to monetize. Google has revamped the idea of affiliate-based, cross-media, C2B2B data hygiene management. The implementation factor is long-term. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and CSS. We think we know that if you architect interactively then you may also monetize dynamically. We realize that it is better to reinvent dynamically than to actualize holistically. Think cyber-resource-constrained. A company that can drive faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize elegantly. We will step up our power to evolve without lessening our aptitude to actualize. We realize that if you visualize virtually then you may also transition perfectly. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our platforms but our capability to utilize. Google is the industry leader of cross-platform architectures. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our distributed project management but our capacity to reintermediate. We always orchestrate B2B mega-impactful convergence. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the commonly-used buzzword "dynamic, dynamic portals" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class, magnetic power shifts and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think end-to-end. We think we know that it is better to generate intuitively than to redefine strategically. We will transition the aptitude of killer, world-class bloatware to expedite. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. A company that can integrate elegantly will (one day) be able to empower faithfully.