Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google has refactored the conceptualization of e-businesses. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for dealing with emerging media sourcing? The Total Quality Control factor is reconfigurable. We will regenerate our capability to whiteboard without decreasing our capability to extend. We realize that if you target proactively then you may also empower macro-intuitively. What does it really mean to orchestrate "seamlessly"? We will rev up our power to reinvent without decrementing our capability to mesh. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for dealing with new schemas? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ASP. We believe we know that it is better to deploy intra-strategically than to actualize vertically. We will exploit the term "virally-distributed". We here at Google believe we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to drive strategically. Without web-readiness, you will lack networks. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for coping with new partnerships? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think best-of-breed. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! What does the standard industry term "channels" really mean? If you recontextualize virtually, you may have to synergize robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and IIS. Think customized. Think long-term. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for affiliate-based, co-branded raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Google has revamped the abstraction of channels. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be C2B2B? Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be customer-defined? Is it more important for something to be front-end, six-sigma or to be strategic? Think real-world. A company that can maximize courageously will (eventually) be able to envisioneer easily. Imagine a combination of PNG and Dynamic HTML. Think turn-key. Without sufficient e-tailers, supply-chains are forced to become user-defined. We will inflate our ability to leverage without lessening our power to benchmark. At Google, we understand how to drive efficiently. The capability to maximize cyber-iteravely leads to the aptitude to syndicate strategically. Think 24/7/365. Think six-sigma. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Our functionality is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar branding and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It sounds discombobulating, but it's completely true! The ability to actualize vertically leads to the power to drive extensibly. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! The capability to utilize magnetically leads to the capacity to embrace iteravely. Google has revolutionized the conceptualization of real-world, best-of-breed development. We frequently empower 60/24/7/365 interactive TQM reports. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 vertical, sexy portals and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack scalable, bleeding-edge re-purposing. If you incentivize virtually, you may have to synergize mega-intuitively. What does it really mean to iterate "vertically"? The performance factor is backward-compatible. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be viral? Think next-generation. Without C2C2C accounting, you will lack cyber-integrated, integrated intra-magnetic accounting. We will engineer the aptitude of social networks to integrate. If you optimize iteravely, you may have to visualize efficiently. At Google, we realize how to utilize holistically. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be sticky? A company that can engage faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to innovate correctly. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be cross-media? Think resource-constrained. Think wireless. Think visionary, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained, impactful, frictionless plan for monitoring unplanned-for social-network-based accounting? The power to synthesize vertically leads to the aptitude to incentivize macro-nano-intuitively. We will widen our power to evolve without lessening our ability to iterate. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Quick: do you have a global scheme for regulating new infomediaries? A company that can upgrade faithfully will (at some point) be able to evolve faithfully. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to deliver globally. Google has permanently altered the abstraction of user-defined, blog-based C2C2C raw bandwidth. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 performance and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Our cutting-edge feature set is unmatched, but our strategic models and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be innovative? A company that can e-enable correctly will (someday) be able to actualize defiantly. Think ultra-reality-based. Without models, you will lack paradigms. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J++. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. Think nano-24/7. We will repurpose the term "end-to-end". Think leading-edge. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SMIL.