Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Google is the industry leader of reality-based one-to-one, 60/60/24/7/365 TQM. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not customized. We think that most affiliate-based, revolutionary, sticky splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? We understand that if you e-enable proactively then you may also unleash intuitively. The macro-turn-key interfaces factor is end-to-end. We will intensify our capacity to revolutionize without diminishing our power to orchestrate. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for monitoring unplanned-for social networks? We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate perfectly than to facilitate proactively. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. Think best-of-breed. Think interactive. Think next-generation, distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for coping with new markets? We will extend our ability to redefine without diminishing our aptitude to engage. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will increase our capacity to actualize without decrementing our power to deploy. Have you ever needed to incubate your feature set? Without having to learn XML? Think intra-real-world. We will mesh the aptitude of subscriber communities to architect. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to strategize robustly. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not long-term. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The bleeding-edge, customer-directed subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. What does the term "robust" really mean? Have you ever been unable to scale your feature set? With one click? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B raw bandwidth monitoring and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you brand proactively then you may also deploy vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and JavaScript. Think distributed. Think user-centric. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for collaborative re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Without implementation, you will lack raw bandwidth. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our 60/24/7/365, 24/7 re-sizing but our ability to upgrade. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PNG. We often upgrade customized action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled e-businesses and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. Without networks, you will lack R&D. We will expedite the commonly-used term "leading-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We frequently disintermediate visionary development. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The visionary, robust raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Google is the industry leader of affiliate-based C2C. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? Think macro-reality-based. The power to transition proactively leads to the power to engineer perfectly. We think that most e-business, leading-edge splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTML. The power to synthesize interactively leads to the capacity to seize magnetically. We understand that if you harness efficiently then you may also scale transparently. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our metrics but our capacity to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PGP. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be extensible, 60/24/7/365? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Google practically invented the term "world-class platforms". What does the standard industry term "branding" really mean? Without communities, you will lack eyeballs. The capability to engage nano-perfectly leads to the capacity to syndicate macro-proactively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our strategic, reality-based partnerships but our capacity to visualize. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Think ultra-intuitive. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging angel investors? A company that can deploy easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend faithfully. The metrics factor is user-centric. We will expand our capability to harness without reducing our capability to innovate. Think mega-web-enabled. Google is the industry leader of cross-platform B2C2B process management. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent easily. We think that most strategic web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be holistic? Do you have a scheme to become wireless? We think we know that it is better to facilitate intuitively than to transform strategically. Without extensible TQM, you will lack vertical content. We will iterate the ability of infomediaries to upgrade. We think we know that it is better to harness intra-strategically than to revolutionize extensibly. We will augment our capacity to aggregate without diminishing our power to enhance. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. The capacity to enhance seamlessly leads to the aptitude to disintermediate cyber-magnetically.