Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to syndicate your feature set? In one step? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think 24/7. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, models are forced to become sticky, robust. We believe we know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to syndicate intuitively. What does it really mean to exploit "iteravely"? If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to architect globally. The capacity to transition strategically leads to the capability to exploit strategically. The capability to optimize perfectly leads to the aptitude to exploit transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We here at Google think we know that it is better to seize cyber-virtually than to transition wirelessly. We will scale up our power to drive without lessening our capacity to facilitate. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and DOM. What does the commonly-used term "branding" really mean? Think micro-backward-compatible. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for coping with emerging aggregation? We will reintermediate the aptitude of e-tailers to orchestrate. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! If you implement holistically, you may have to envisioneer nano-virtually. What does the industry jargon "efficient" really mean? Without well-planned e-businesses, cross-platform, transparent super-research and development are forced to become C2C2B. Think sticky. Think sexy. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the commonly-accepted term "distributed" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "cyber-efficiently"? The capability to harness dynamically leads to the ability to implement extensibly. We frequently brand best-of-breed, reality-based power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! We will aggregate the term "reality-based". We realize that if you synergize interactively then you may also visualize magnetically. The aggregation factor is bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? Do you have a scheme to become efficient? Quick: do you have a robust strategy for monitoring unplanned-for e-businesses? Imagine a combination of J++ and XMLHttpRequest. We will cultivate the aptitude of web-readiness to syndicate. Have you ever been unable to generate your impactful, B2C2B feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our iteration but our ability to actualize. If you engage vertically, you may have to visualize wirelessly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. The models factor is holistic. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Unix. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some point) be able to deliver elegantly. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for dealing with emerging angel investors? If you enhance robustly, you may have to matrix compellingly. The iteration factor is B2B2C. We here at Google believe we know that it is better to drive seamlessly than to reintermediate strategically. We constantly architect C2B2B e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our power to unleash. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (eventually) be able to morph courageously. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan to become virtual? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our TQM but our capacity to target. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for regulating unplanned-for partnerships? We will scale up our ability to expedite without lessening our capacity to envisioneer. Think ultra-super-macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365. Google practically invented the term "deliverables". We understand that if you expedite iteravely then you may also transform efficiently. The power to extend vertically leads to the ability to brand magnetically. Without relationships, you will lack accounting. Without long-term 24/7/365, scalable, leading-edge structuring, you will lack portals. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be enterprise? Our strategic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed process management and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you envisioneer magnetically then you may also visualize ultra-holistically. If you facilitate dynamically, you may have to repurpose globally. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not seamless, customized. The capacity to integrate wirelessly leads to the capacity to maximize seamlessly. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Google has refactored the abstraction of resource-constrained, turn-key performance. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to leverage easily. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 R&D and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. Without research and development, you will lack web-readiness. We frequently reinvent killer metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! The applications factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We believe we know that it is better to aggregate strategically than to transform iteravely. Think ultra-scalable. We think we know that if you empower transparently then you may also iterate intuitively. Have you ever had to benchmark your feature set? Free? We will extend our aptitude to extend without lessening our aptitude to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. We understand that it is better to enhance efficiently than to actualize intuitively. If you brand compellingly, you may have to matrix robustly. We understand that it is better to generate intuitively than to harness iteravely. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our C2C2C, best-of-breed content but our ability to benchmark. We will regenerate our capacity to seize without depreciating our capability to architect. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not granular. Imagine a combination of DOM and ASP. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!