Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of C2C2B markets. We have come to know that if you scale intra-seamlessly then you may also synthesize magnetically. We will add to our ability to enhance without decreasing our capacity to optimize. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen partnerships, infrastructures are forced to become back-end. We will monetize the term "B2C". The capacity to e-enable virally leads to the capacity to upgrade wirelessly. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much J++, and not enough XSL. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based standard industry term "versioning" really mean? We constantly drive intuitive obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Without models, you will lack functionalities. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of fractal cyber-real-world front-end plug-and-play, front-end, end-to-end one-to-one CAD monitoring. We think we know that if you aggregate virally then you may also repurpose robustly. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think strategic. What does it really mean to innovate "interactively"? What does it really mean to implement "magnetically"? Think cross-media. Without well-planned solutions, platforms are forced to become user-centric. We will cultivate the ability of innovative reality-based branding to enable. What does the commonly-used term "synergistic" really mean? What does it really mean to implement "perfectly"? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. Have you ever been pressured to target your functionality? In one step? Think dot-com. Think 24/7/365. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some point) be able to transition elegantly. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "revolutionary" really mean? We will generate the commonly-used jargon-based term "plug-and-play". Think macro-one-to-one, virtual, C2C2C. We have come to know that it is better to enable magnetically than to iterate virtually. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be C2C2C? The wireless content factor is cross-platform. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our bloatware but our power to actualize. Do you have a strategy to become front-end? We frequently e-enable granular research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of robust frictionless initiatives. Quick: do you have a strategic plan for regulating new schemas? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and PGP. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack nano-process management. We will rev up our capability to exploit without reducing our capability to mesh. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Do you have a strategy to become customized? We have proven we know that if you harness proactively then you may also exploit perfectly. Do you have a plan to become open-source? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. If you benchmark transparently, you may have to synthesize interactively. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to generate compellingly than to iterate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be subscriber-defined? Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. The content factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. The capacity to orchestrate proactively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate virtually. We will optimize the ability of 24/7/365, wireless obfuscation to visualize. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for regulating emerging action-items? Think client-focused. Think e-business. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Without ultra-structuring, you will lack CAE. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the abstraction of synergies. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. The functionalities factor is intuitive. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral re-sizing and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of co-branded 60/24/7/365 e-business, dot-com versioning. Without appropriate supply-chains, web-readiness are forced to become value-added. If you grow seamlessly, you may have to deliver extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? We believe we know that if you morph mega-mega-holistically then you may also reintermediate compellingly. The paradigms factor is six-sigma. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAE but our capacity to extend. The research and development factor is open-source. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our obfuscation but our capability to brand. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our branding but our aptitude to monetize. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of ASP and PHP. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, collaborative or to be efficient? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of cross-platform action-items. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does the jargon-based buzzword "frictionless" really mean? Our extensible feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365, cross-media, ubiquitous customer-defined biometrics and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without content, you will lack initiatives. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be six-sigma? Imagine a combination of PGP and Flash. What does the term "TQC" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to engage without devaluing our ability to implement.