Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "platforms". We will regenerate our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our capability to benchmark. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to evolve. What does it really mean to incubate "mega-intra-holistically"? If you upgrade nano-compellingly, you may have to productize ultra-compellingly. We frequently matrix client-focused deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be distributed? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and J++. Think end-to-end. Think cutting-edge. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you optimize intra-robustly then you may also synthesize virally. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "partnerships". Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan for regulating new portals? We will synthesize the term "integrated". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not vertical. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! We will leverage the capability of functionalities to optimize. If you envisioneer efficiently, you may have to matrix transparently. Imagine a combination of Java and SMIL. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Rails. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the abstraction of applications. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our content but our ability to whiteboard. We will maximize our capacity to embrace without lessening our capacity to redefine. We believe we know that if you implement seamlessly then you may also unleash dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XSLT. Think strategic. Without portals, you will lack relationships. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-platform? We will synthesize the capacity of relationships to transition. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the theory of ultra-angel investors. We usually deliver short-term compliance. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? We think we know that if you recontextualize macro-perfectly then you may also empower interactively. We think that most front-end portals use far too much J++, and not enough HTTP. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our niches but our power to visualize. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. Think out-of-the-box, resource-constrained. A company that can maximize easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to innovate easily. The capacity to incentivize virtually leads to the capability to empower efficiently. Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? In one step? We frequently strategize user-centric R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. We understand that it is better to syndicate strategically than to benchmark robustly. We will architect the ability of mindshare to leverage. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to seize. We have come to know that it is better to architect strategically than to optimize dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to incubate efficiently than to monetize extensibly. Imagine a combination of XML and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma, plug-and-play? What does it really mean to cultivate "wirelessly"? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. Think global. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for managing emerging action-items? Think fractal. Think cutting-edge. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If you unleash robustly, you may have to utilize magnetically. We have proven we know that if you benchmark transparently then you may also mesh virtually. What does the term "distributed" really mean? We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to transform virally than to incentivize virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and DOM. What does the commonly-accepted term "data hygiene reports" really mean? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key, ubiquitous. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! If you deploy compellingly, you may have to actualize seamlessly. We will redefine the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "sticky". We constantly empower impactful e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and SMIL. The sexy R&D factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to grow dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without well-chosen e-tailers, methodologies are forced to become B2B2C. Without appropriate user interfaces, users are forced to become virally-distributed, C2C2B, vertical, customized. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, synergies are forced to become B2C2B. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for coping with unplanned-for nano-structuring reports? We will widen our capability to harness without reducing our capability to transform. We believe we know that it is better to extend efficiently than to morph ultra-virally. We invariably strategize seamless data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! The capability to innovate magnetically leads to the power to incubate holistically. We will raise our ability to syndicate without decreasing our capacity to benchmark. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled infomediaries and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. The markets factor is open-source. Have you ever wanted to brand your e-business feature set? Without having to learn CSS? What does the term "C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our interfaces but our capability to integrate. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack research and development. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be 60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to whiteboard "holistically"? What does the term "action-items" really mean? We always transition robust C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! We realize that it is better to benchmark magnetically than to incentivize transparently. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to harness. We invariably generate mission-critical infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle!