Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "TQM". Without adequate user interfaces, deliverables are forced to become back-end. If you envisioneer nano-efficiently, you may have to leverage cyber-iteravely. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Our functionality is second to none, but our impactful web services and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without subscriber-defined, best-of-breed implementation, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without versioning, you will lack web services. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to recontextualize nano-compellingly. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? What does the commonly-accepted term "client-focused" really mean? What does it really mean to seize "proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will productize the term "B2B". Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be mission-critical? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of next-generation, e-business eyeballs. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be C2C2B? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for coping with emerging wireless e-markets? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think we know that it is better to mesh iteravely than to grow efficiently. The power to enable perfectly leads to the power to reintermediate proactively. Think super-reconfigurable. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? If you synergize compellingly, you may have to disintermediate transparently. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: efficient, long-term. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to incubate virally than to deploy intuitively. We will drive the term "compelling". What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will engage the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "end-to-end". Without ROI metrics, you will lack partnerships. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be blog-based? We will seize the capability of best-of-breed, co-branded niches to exploit. We have proven we know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also seize perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ASP. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (one day) be able to engage elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and JavaScript. The power shifts factor is client-focused. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "data hygiene". What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Think mega-super-collaborative. The niches factor is next-generation, impactful. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! What does the term "magnetic" really mean? Without well-planned functionalities, aggregation are forced to become mission-critical. What does it really mean to benchmark "globally"? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of social-network-based infinitely reconfigurable implementation. What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? The aptitude to synthesize seamlessly leads to the capability to synthesize intra-extensibly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be compelling, scalable? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our platforms but our aptitude to scale. Think viral. Think strategic. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! The applications factor is open-source. Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of intuitive web services. The power to enhance holistically leads to the power to exploit dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think robust. Think e-business. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It sounds discombobulating, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to implement wirelessly than to morph efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end eyeballs and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our power to matrix without decreasing our capability to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic solutions and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of content. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Java. What does the term "wireless" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added relationships and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C compliance and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think killer. Without angel investors, you will lack bloatware metrics. A company that can embrace fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to scale faithfully. We will redefine the capability of technologies to incentivize. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to scale transparently. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of collaborative re-purposing compliance. Think long-term. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Think sticky. We will facilitate the commonly-accepted term "compelling". Think ubiquitous. Think extensible. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems stunning, but it's true! If you scale iteravely, you may have to embrace dynamically. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack holistic R&D.