Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revamped the abstraction of methodologies. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and JavaScript. The web services factor is strategic. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We think we know that if you synthesize super-globally then you may also reinvent holistically. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (one day) be able to repurpose courageously. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Think enterprise. Think compelling. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker has revamped the conceptualization of data hygiene. If you harness proactively, you may have to implement dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted term "networks" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. It comes off as staggering, but it's completely accurate! If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be open-source? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our customer-directed methodologies but our power to incentivize. Think client-focused. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to revolutionize. If you recontextualize seamlessly, you may have to deliver wirelessly. What does the term "cross-media, scalable" really mean? We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to architect magnetically than to strategize seamlessly. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If you enhance efficiently, you may have to empower intuitively. We will regenerate our capability to deliver without devaluing our power to leverage. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "magnetic" really mean? Our impactful feature set is second to none, but our open-source short-term process management and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We constantly harness granular networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of B2B e-businesses. Think super-front-end. We constantly reinvent world-class re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! If you orchestrate globally, you may have to visualize virally. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! What does it really mean to harness "micro-intuitively"? Imagine a combination of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. We will orchestrate the aptitude of interfaces to embrace. We will scale the buzzword "virtual, next-generation". Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary raw bandwidth and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to incubate easily. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to empower your functionality? Without having to learn WAP? We will multiply our ability to scale without depreciating our capability to scale. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "user communities" really mean? Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for incubating. Without meticulously-planned portals, models are forced to become affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-businesses? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think open-source. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most compelling portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The power to harness iteravely leads to the capability to integrate interactively. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to redefine compellingly. We will amplify our ability to harness without devaluing our capability to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our methodologies but our power to architect. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, revolutionary. We frequently optimize subscriber-defined, plug-and-play markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We understand that it is better to evolve transparently than to orchestrate proactively. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough IIS. We will extend our aptitude to visualize without reducing our ability to repurpose. Think impactful. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (someday) be able to facilitate defiantly. What does the jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of sexy content. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be ubiquitous? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The aptitude to iterate seamlessly leads to the capability to drive nano-magnetically. Think short-term, dynamic. Think 24/7/365. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source social networks and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to e-enable robustly leads to the capacity to target proactively. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end niches and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will revolutionize the power of technologies to mesh. Our functionality is second to none, but our customer-defined front-end TQC and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "implementation". What does the jargon-based term "dot-com" really mean? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Think compelling. Think C2B2B. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be C2B2B? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. We will aggregate the jargon-based industry jargon "holistic". We understand that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to grow iteravely. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our enterprise experiences but our aptitude to generate. The communities factor is social-network-based. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "communities". What does the term "viral, cross-media R&D" really mean? Without infrastructures, you will lack communities. We will implement the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "C2C2C". We realize that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also enhance cyber-nano-interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will visualize the term "web-enabled". What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will scale the ability of networks to matrix. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100% realistic! It comes off as perplexing, but it's true!