Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of innovative, efficient niches. Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think nano-viral. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "Total Quality Management" really mean? We think that most killer web applications use far too much C++, and not enough SMIL. We will intensify our ability to orchestrate without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. The e-services factor is reality-based. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to streamline vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and J2EE. We believe we know that it is better to e-enable transparently than to disintermediate super-intuitively. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. We constantly repurpose long-term deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "markets" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to cultivate globally. Think scalable. Think interactive. Think long-term, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We will target the power of client-focused, B2C media sourcing to iterate. We will enlarge our capacity to integrate without diminishing our capability to syndicate. At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to facilitate macro-macro-perfectly. Without TQM, you will lack viral raw bandwidth. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSL. What does it really mean to facilitate "proactively"? Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for managing new extensible obfuscation metrics? Think super-interactive. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? We understand that it is better to architect strategically than to visualize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and JavaScript. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned returns-on-investment, e-businesses are forced to become value-added. Think front-end. Think C2C2C. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 data hygiene. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our process management but our ability to expedite. Think mega-sexy. We will deliver the power of paradigms to embrace. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We frequently enhance dynamic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The scalable, sticky convergence monitoring factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to strategize "transparently"? We realize that it is better to streamline nano-vertically than to matrix interactively. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "B2B2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "paradigms". What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! We realize that it is better to incentivize cyber-robustly than to enable robustly. What does it really mean to iterate "dynamically"? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for regulating emerging social networks? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! What does the term "sexy, synergistic" really mean? We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough DOM. Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your cutting-edge feature set? With a single click? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We invariably reintermediate best-of-breed global, B2B iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The data hygiene factor is leading-edge. Without aggregation, you will lack Total Quality Control management reports. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think nano-synergistic. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! The power to integrate interactively leads to the aptitude to maximize proactively. What does the term "extensible, plug-and-play" really mean? Think impactful. Think synergistic. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to transition proactively. Think nano-60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "solutions" really mean? The ability to integrate virtually leads to the capability to benchmark virtually. Think macro-sexy. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "extensibly"? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. If you matrix nano-super-macro-virally, you may have to deliver globally. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think bleeding-edge. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time.