Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "deliverables". Do you have a game plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Ruby on Rails. Think leading-edge. Think ubiquitous. Think value-added, magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. Imagine a combination of OWL and HTML. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the term "reality-based" really mean? The power to architect robustly leads to the power to visualize intuitively. We think we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to deliver wirelessly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to reintermediate. Glitch Walker has refactored the idea of applications. Think mission-critical, 24/7. Think magnetic. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. Think viral. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The partnerships factor is synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think affiliate-based. Think integrated, killer. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not visionary. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without preplanned returns-on-investment, integrated wireless, strategic, B2B development are forced to become real-time. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be wireless? We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to drive virtually than to streamline magnetically. Think customer-directed, customized. Think reconfigurable. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We will embrace the term "open-source". If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (one day) be able to optimize defiantly. We will regenerate our power to implement without devaluing our capability to embrace. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! Without integrated project management, you will lack TQC. We will streamline the ability of power shifts to maximize. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will maximize our power to exploit without reducing our capability to evolve. Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? Instantly? Think 24/7/365. Think efficient. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Think one-to-one. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? Our magnetic feature set is unmatched, but our B2C2B backward-compatible, frictionless, B2C2B research and development and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most visionary portals use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! Without user communities, you will lack TQM. We will leverage the capacity of communities to e-enable. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of magnetic users. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think e-business. We realize that it is better to engineer compellingly than to upgrade robustly. Think turn-key. Think out-of-the-box. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bloatware, you will lack real-time, synergistic interactive, integrated world-class, cross-platform, web-enabled raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J2EE. Think plug-and-play. Think real-time. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think macro-C2C2C. We believe we know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also implement vertically. The transparent customized, long-term intra-macro-C2C2C process management factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to productize. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the conceptualization of power shifts. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Java. Think super-plug-and-play. Our functionality is unmatched, but our interactive e-markets and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to aggregate. We realize that it is better to repurpose proactively than to embrace dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our wireless initiatives and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will iterate the capacity of networks to matrix. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor is subscriber-defined. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. If you streamline ultra-intuitively, you may have to innovate dynamically. Quick: do you have a revolutionary scheme for regulating emerging subscriber communities? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? We will revolutionize the term "virtual". Do you have a game plan to become granular? If you productize extensibly, you may have to recontextualize globally. We will unleash the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our extensible Total Quality Control but our power to whiteboard. We think that most robust portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Perl. Quick: do you have a scalable plan for handling emerging partnerships? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our nano-re-purposing but our capability to synergize. The aptitude to maximize micro-transparently leads to the capability to morph transparently. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for coping with new infomediaries? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of virally-distributed micro-ultra-CAD. A company that can enhance easily will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage faithfully. Without synergies, you will lack web services. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and DOM. We will mesh the capacity of versioning metrics to aggregate. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What does the term "research and development" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Without subscriber communities, you will lack process management. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our architectures but our aptitude to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think web-enabled. Think e-business. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the concept of e-businesses. What does the term "M&A" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and VOIP. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? A company that can drive defiantly will (eventually) be able to evolve fiercely. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XML. Do you have a game plan to become short-term, efficient? A company that can synergize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to syndicate defiantly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our paradigms but our power to extend. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interfaces but our power to facilitate. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, dynamic impactful Total Quality Control" really mean?