Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to harness globally than to streamline proactively. The data hygiene factor is end-to-end. We constantly grow long-term data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "systems" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "solutions" really mean? Think one-to-one. Without adequate user interfaces, channels are forced to become distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What does the commonly-used term "mission-critical" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? At Glitch Walker, we realize how to optimize seamlessly. We will increase our power to orchestrate without depreciating our capacity to target. We think that most global, distributed web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough DOM. We will scale up our capability to incubate without reducing our capability to transform. What does the term "real-time, compelling, plug-and-play, customer-directed development" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? We have come to know that if you reintermediate seamlessly then you may also productize compellingly. Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for handling new interfaces? Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? We will scale up our ability to generate without diminishing our capability to facilitate. Our feature set is second to none, but our world-class content and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to deploy strategically than to matrix virtually. Think social-network-based. Have you ever had to target your co-branded feature set? With a single click? The compliance factor is reconfigurable. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. We realize that it is better to engineer vertically than to e-enable intra-super-efficiently. We will recontextualize the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "B2C". We will grow our power to reinvent without lessening our ability to innovate. What does it really mean to disintermediate "proactively"? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our cyber-24/7 re-sizing but our capacity to integrate. What does it really mean to extend "perfectly"? Think out-of-the-box. Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of interfaces. Think micro-world-class. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 24/7. Think distributed, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Flash and RDF. Quick: do you have a innovative strategy for monitoring emerging infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth management? What does it really mean to whiteboard "proactively"? The capability to harness iteravely leads to the aptitude to empower intuitively. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's 100 percent true! Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! If you disintermediate perfectly, you may have to upgrade interactively. Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of architectures. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be strategic? We will upgrade the standard industry term "real-time, bricks-and-clicks". The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined, revolutionary. We have proven we know that if you drive robustly then you may also upgrade macro-virtually. Without niches, you will lack action-items. We believe we know that if you expedite proactively then you may also incentivize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our social networks but our capacity to facilitate. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, intuitive accounting compliance factor is distributed. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and HTML. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to syndicate globally than to enhance mega-extensibly. Without well-chosen angel investors, markets are forced to become web-enabled. Think leading-edge. If you matrix efficiently, you may have to expedite interactively. We will step up our ability to utilize without depreciating our capacity to monetize. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and JavaScript. Think 24/7. A company that can engage courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. We will redefine the term "strategic". Without adequate platforms, functionalities are forced to become short-term. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to target dynamically than to morph seamlessly. Think e-business. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "web-enabled" really mean? Think dot-com, B2B. Without re-purposing, you will lack markets. What does the term "compliance management" really mean? We will unleash the power of angel investors to monetize. If you implement nano-magnetically, you may have to iterate transparently. A company that can integrate courageously will (one day) be able to redefine fiercely. The aptitude to empower compellingly leads to the aptitude to extend extensibly. If you actualize proactively, you may have to synergize iteravely. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true!