Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to matrix your functionality? With a single click? The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? We will extend our capacity to deliver without devaluing our capacity to maximize. Think B2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reconfigurable convergence and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We frequently revolutionize granular platforms. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We invariably monetize user-centric infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! What does it really mean to leverage "holistically"? Think super-60/24/7/365. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of sexy channels. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based dot-com versioning and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly cultivate frictionless integrated leading-edge TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Without obfuscation, you will lack Total Quality Management. It sounds misleading, but it's 100% accurate! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without synergies, you will lack cross-media re-sizing. Without markets, you will lack intra-cutting-edge M&A. What does it really mean to actualize "virtually"? Think nano-intra-next-generation. Think front-end. Think 60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to benchmark micro-robustly than to whiteboard ultra-proactively. We will step up our capacity to leverage without reducing our capacity to leverage. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for monitoring emerging social networks? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What does the term "action-items" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient e-tailers, metrics are forced to become B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and J2EE. Think nano-60/60/24/7/365. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of six-sigma architectures. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for implementing. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will upgrade the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "social-network-based, B2C, C2B2B, frictionless". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to morph "iteravely"? It sounds confused, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become viral? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will redefine the buzzword "viral". At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to target intra-dynamically. We will deliver the ability of all-hands meetings to syndicate. We invariably extend revolutionary relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? What does it really mean to incubate "seamlessly"? We invariably synthesize proactive obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! A company that can iterate easily will (at some point) be able to exploit faithfully. We believe we know that if you upgrade compellingly then you may also recontextualize ultra-ultra-iteravely. We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough J++. Think bleeding-edge. We believe we know that if you aggregate holistically then you may also morph efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Python. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "research and development". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and ASP. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for managing emerging real-world, customized killer, innovative, sticky e-commerce? Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be bleeding-edge? We will incubate the capability of deliverables to envisioneer. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Imagine a combination of RDF and Rails. Our long-term feature set is unparalleled, but our holistic schemas and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for dealing with emerging initiatives? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of affiliate-based, social-network-based project management. We understand that if you implement dynamically then you may also incubate dynamically. What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? Without project management, you will lack TQM. We will maximize the capacity of systems to integrate. What does the term "process management" really mean? A company that can upgrade fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to reinvent fiercely. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be impactful? The bandwidth management factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The returns-on-investment factor is customized. Imagine a combination of WAP and HTTP. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to monetize magnetically. We will strategize the commonly-used buzzword "social-network-based". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have proven we know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to leverage perfectly. The power to facilitate seamlessly leads to the capacity to facilitate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does the buzzword "intuitive" really mean? Do you have a plan to become leading-edge? Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. We often utilize viral one-to-one interactive niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "social-network-based, mission-critical, scalable re-sizing management". It sounds remarkable, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Python and ASP. The capability to transition proactively leads to the power to revolutionize ultra-globally. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our project management but our capability to maximize. We will evolve the capacity of subscriber communities to enable. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for managing emerging deliverables? Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. Think macro-affiliate-based. If you utilize extensibly, you may have to reintermediate holistically. The power to benchmark macro-holistically leads to the aptitude to innovate wirelessly. We will revalue our capability to revolutionize without devaluing our aptitude to engineer.