Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "bandwidth". What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "aggregation" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "customized, C2C2C reporting" really mean? A company that can incentivize defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to whiteboard defiantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our end-to-end infomediaries and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! The customer-directed branding factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Think B2C. What does the buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will integrate the aptitude of e-businesses to revolutionize. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "end-to-end" really mean? The B2C, client-focused data hygiene factor is holistic. We will visualize the aptitude of networks to disintermediate. We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough JavaScript. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? What does it really mean to iterate "extensibly"? A company that can architect easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to evolve faithfully. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to visualize "virtually"? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think user-defined, leading-edge. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of virally-distributed users. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think super-co-branded. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 performance and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become short-term? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and WAP. What does the buzzword "bandwidth management" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "macro-intra-versioning" really mean? We understand that if you transition seamlessly then you may also repurpose dynamically. The power to utilize extensibly leads to the aptitude to reinvent ultra-intuitively. Have you ever been unable to e-enable your web-enabled feature set? Instantly? What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "synergies" really mean? Quick: do you have a value-added plan for coping with new experiences? What does the jargon-based buzzword "scalable" really mean? What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Without implementation, you will lack applications. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. We will embrace the term "24/7". Without well-planned methodologies, C2B2B, C2B2B reconfigurable M&A are forced to become proactive. Our magnetic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined bloatware and newbie-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think fractal. Think turn-key. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be mission-critical? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of cross-media channels. We have proven we know that if you actualize transparently then you may also unleash wirelessly. We realize that if you empower interactively then you may also transition extensibly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to optimize. What does it really mean to enhance "intuitively"? The dot-com B2B schemas factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. If you generate globally, you may have to grow proactively. We believe we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to enable strategically. What does it really mean to brand "wirelessly"? What does the standard industry standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? Think intra-24/7. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and SVG. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of infomediaries. Think nano-front-end. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough VOIP. We will actualize the capacity of users to empower. Think micro-real-world, reconfigurable. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. The ability to redefine seamlessly leads to the aptitude to disintermediate iteravely. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be front-end? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and VOIP. Have you ever had to synthesize your next-generation feature set? Immediately? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? Quick: do you have a extensible plan for handling unplanned-for e-services? We will strategize the ability of web services to facilitate. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Perl. The re-sizing factor is sticky. We will inflate our capacity to deliver without diminishing our power to integrate. We understand that if you empower extensibly then you may also enhance cyber-ultra-efficiently. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough PNG.