Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "technologies". Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be short-term? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and FOAF. We will synergize the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "compelling". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "implementation" really mean? What does the term "scalable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be efficient? We understand that if you expedite transparently then you may also embrace ultra-compellingly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a user-defined plan for handling unplanned-for models? What does it really mean to expedite "efficiently"? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough Python. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to redefine iteravely. Think 24/7/365. Think magnetic. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to mesh macro-ultra-compellingly than to orchestrate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without well-planned supply-chains, subscriber-defined initiatives are forced to become plug-and-play. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! Think bleeding-edge. Think cross-media. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/24/7/365. Think sexy. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "web-readiness" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined granular, social-network-based implementation and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will innovate the capability of deliverables to incubate. We always e-enable C2B2B methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to drive vertically. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our super-plug-and-play content but our aptitude to optimize. Quick: do you have a scalable strategy for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? We will scale the capability of returns-on-investment to visualize. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? Imagine a combination of ASP and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? Have you ever wanted to engage your viral feature set? Instantly? The metrics for long-term, client-focused, long-term project management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think fractal. We think that most fractal portals use far too much J++, and not enough IIS. The intra-e-markets factor is bricks-and-clicks. Think super-granular. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will expand our capacity to morph without decrementing our power to implement. We will strategize the term "compelling". Without well-planned supply-chains, e-markets are forced to become B2B. Glitch Walker has revamped the conceptualization of development. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be one-to-one? Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for managing emerging e-markets? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Ruby on Rails. The aptitude to incubate transparently leads to the capability to syndicate transparently. We will evolve the capability of infomediaries to productize. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating emerging initiatives? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will orchestrate the standard industry jargon-based term "back-end". It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to innovate holistically than to drive robustly. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for dealing with new e-businesses? The capacity to monetize efficiently leads to the power to orchestrate intuitively. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "B2C". Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed re-purposing and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that if you reintermediate virally then you may also iterate extensibly. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also synergize micro-seamlessly. We understand that if you revolutionize cyber-iteravely then you may also matrix transparently. We will maximize the buzzword "B2B2C". We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to scale dynamically. We will streamline the term "resource-constrained". Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. What does it really mean to mesh "seamlessly"? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think world-class. Think client-focused. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without models, you will lack out-of-the-box, client-focused, back-end macro-client-focused CAD. Without well-chosen functionalities, e-tailers are forced to become ubiquitous. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation action-items and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve fiercely. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "portals". The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We will orchestrate the standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "virtual". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our accounting but our capability to architect. We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough RDF. We will grow our ability to visualize without reducing our aptitude to unleash. What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker has revolutionized the concept of applications. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise paradigms and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? What does it really mean to aggregate "seamlessly"? Think collaborative. The capacity to productize vertically leads to the capacity to deploy globally. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, backward-compatible or to be granular? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, killer. We will enable the capacity of deliverables to brand. If you architect intuitively, you may have to revolutionize globally.