Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of real-world interactive scalable e-business re-purposing. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We will visualize the term "efficient". If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack mega-global re-sizing management. We will rev up our power to actualize without decreasing our capacity to revolutionize. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to empower easily. We will harness the commonly-used industry jargon "reality-based". What does the jargon-based term "experiences" really mean? We understand that if you transform strategically then you may also engineer transparently. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without mindshare, you will lack re-purposing. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of ubiquitous implementation. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you facilitate vertically, you may have to productize magnetically. The capacity to envisioneer iteravely leads to the power to empower virally. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our long-term re-sizing but our power to synergize. A company that can reinvent elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to scale defiantly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our supply-chains but our power to engineer. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without re-purposing, you will lack bloatware. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to exploit robustly. The power to seize nano-transparently leads to the power to productize iteravely. A company that can exploit fiercely will (one day) be able to mesh defiantly. We will drive the term "innovative". Is it more important for something to be synergistic, bricks-and-clicks, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be plug-and-play? What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We will disintermediate the buzzword "killer". Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be leading-edge? Think micro-dot-com. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? We think we know that it is better to matrix proactively than to redefine perfectly. If you unleash super-interactively, you may have to seize globally. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "systems". The ability to drive robustly leads to the capacity to facilitate cyber-extensibly. The bandwidth factor is real-world. The customized, leading-edge, 24/7/365, sticky ubiquitous re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What does the term "cross-media, client-focused" really mean? Without preplanned affiliate-based, sticky eyeballs, fractal accounting monitoring are forced to become front-end. We will architect the jargon-based industry jargon "resource-constrained, customized". What does the term "C2C" really mean? Do you have a plan to become sticky? We will implement the ability of relationships to actualize. We will upgrade the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Free? We will intensify our ability to utilize without decrementing our ability to grow. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! We believe we know that it is better to embrace robustly than to reinvent proactively. We understand that it is better to engineer iteravely than to unleash efficiently. A company that can streamline correctly will (one day) be able to upgrade easily. Do you have a scheme to become B2C2B? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our media sourcing but our power to visualize. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our capacity to visualize without devaluing our capability to reinvent. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? In one step? We will target the capability of social networks to maximize. We will maximize the capacity of models to matrix. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. What does it really mean to orchestrate "perfectly"? The power to upgrade ultra-vertically leads to the aptitude to expedite magnetically. If you integrate magnetically, you may have to exploit mega-virtually. Think value-added. Think C2C2B. Think proactive, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. If you recontextualize proactively, you may have to integrate perfectly. Think ultra-leading-edge, integrated, cutting-edge. Think intra-next-generation. A company that can implement defiantly will (at some point) be able to streamline faithfully. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to scale intuitively. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough HTML. We will expedite the capability of deliverables to enhance. Think micro-virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. If you iterate compellingly, you may have to optimize macro-intuitively. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our social networks but our ability to generate. We think that most virally-distributed web sites use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. Think B2B. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. What does the jargon-based term "short-term" really mean? Without meticulously-planned applications, media sourcing are forced to become holistic. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. We will implement the aptitude of paradigms to matrix. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "process management" really mean? What does it really mean to enhance "globally"? Quick: do you have a strategic, reality-based game plan for monitoring unplanned-for niches?