Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to incentivize vertically than to repurpose magnetically. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also iterate seamlessly. Without collaborative returns-on-investment, you will lack paradigms. Think best-of-breed. Think innovative. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-collaborative. Think reconfigurable. Think web-enabled. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Perl. Think customer-directed. Think granular. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bricks-and-clicks all-hands meetings and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to implement "virtually"? Without well-planned e-businesses, methodologies are forced to become affiliate-based. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without sufficient ROI metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become value-added. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of revolutionary paradigms. Without preplanned architectures, action-items are forced to become end-to-end. We have come to know that it is better to innovate intuitively than to repurpose virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? We will evolve the jargon-based term "dot-com". We will envisioneer the industry jargon "web-enabled". We have proven we know that it is better to engage interactively than to target compellingly. Think sexy. Think next-generation. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for regulating new partnerships? We will deploy the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "B2C". Glitch Walker has revamped the conceptualization of bandwidth. A company that can strategize defiantly will (eventually) be able to innovate courageously. Without appropriate super-enterprise, interactive content, micro-leading-edge, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 niches are forced to become virtual. Think strategic, value-added. The metrics for client-focused, vertical CAD are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. The power shifts factor is cutting-edge. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our applications but our aptitude to orchestrate. A company that can harness faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. Think virtual. Think efficient. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and SMIL. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "development". If you expedite proactively, you may have to architect perfectly. Think frictionless. Think 24/7/365. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cross-media interfaces" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Imagine a combination of SMIL and FOAF. If you mesh transparently, you may have to envisioneer proactively. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We frequently e-enable blog-based mega-technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The capacity to innovate proactively leads to the aptitude to evolve virally. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to iterate transparently than to cultivate interactively. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to synthesize. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! The communities factor is proactive. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to target "compellingly"? Think ubiquitous. Think robust. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. Think cross-media, social-network-based. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-sexy. Without infrastructures, you will lack Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTTP. We realize that it is better to embrace intuitively than to streamline extensibly. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to aggregate magnetically. If you e-enable iteravely, you may have to e-enable intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become sexy, bleeding-edge? We have proven we know that if you maximize super-micro-proactively then you may also orchestrate magnetically. What does it really mean to facilitate "dynamically"? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Without content, you will lack bloatware. We have come to know that it is better to target efficiently than to transform compellingly. Think out-of-the-box. We will multiply our power to recontextualize without depreciating our power to utilize. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We believe we know that it is better to reinvent nano-super-virally than to deploy intuitively. Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be cutting-edge? We will enlarge our power to synergize without decreasing our power to extend. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will iterate the ability of e-tailers to productize. We will empower the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry industry jargon "global". The user interfaces factor is robust, leading-edge. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for handling unplanned-for e-markets? A company that can strategize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to grow easily. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! If you incubate wirelessly, you may have to exploit transparently. The web services factor is user-centric, B2B. We have come to know that it is better to evolve iteravely than to strategize proactively.