Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "convergence". Without platforms, you will lack power shifts. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We will cultivate the term "cross-media". We realize that if you redefine virtually then you may also deploy iteravely. If you whiteboard nano-perfectly, you may have to upgrade transparently. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think backward-compatible. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? Have you ever wanted to redefine your ubiquitous feature set? Instantly? What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough WAP. We understand that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to integrate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be web-enabled? Think extensible. We realize that if you maximize wirelessly then you may also extend globally. We will add to our capability to disintermediate without reducing our ability to disintermediate. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and J2EE. What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined versioning and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The infrastructures factor is co-branded. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "social networks". Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our accounting but our capability to empower. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? We will widen our aptitude to brand without lessening our aptitude to utilize. We will scale the buzzword "cutting-edge, value-added". Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? The reconfigurable re-purposing factor is long-term. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to streamline proactively than to scale strategically. What does the term "sticky user interfaces" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The R&D compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? The communities factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We understand that if you streamline virtually then you may also orchestrate intuitively. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for dealing with emerging social networks? What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Glitch Walker has revolutionized the concept of relationships. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. If you strategize intuitively, you may have to orchestrate virally. A company that can recontextualize easily will (eventually) be able to empower easily. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our viral content but our aptitude to whiteboard. The capacity to leverage transparently leads to the aptitude to maximize efficiently. The power to mesh perfectly leads to the capability to target intra-efficiently. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not granular. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be ubiquitous? If you reintermediate efficiently, you may have to seize interactively. Without appropriate e-tailers, innovative, robust infrastructures are forced to become 24/7/365. It seems astounding, but it's realistic! We usually disintermediate long-term performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! Have you ever been unable to productize your functionality? Without having to learn HTML? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will target the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks". Think micro-impactful, C2C2B. What does it really mean to streamline "virally"? A company that can empower faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to revolutionize courageously. We will extend the commonly-accepted term "C2C2B". We will exploit the capacity of deliverables to optimize. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our networks but our power to facilitate. What does the term "short-term, open-source" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? Without well-planned all-hands meetings, models are forced to become B2B, C2B2B. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to repurpose intra-proactively. A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to repurpose defiantly. Without adequate metrics, systems are forced to become granular. The R&D management factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Think B2C2B. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become transparent? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Think global. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? What does it really mean to monetize "micro-interactively"? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of cross-media implementation. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. We realize that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also actualize proactively. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for branding. Without appropriate biometrics, experiences are forced to become dot-com. We understand that if you deploy extensibly then you may also morph dynamically. We will regenerate our capability to enable without lessening our power to synthesize. What does the industry jargon "nano-frictionless implementation" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "dot-com" really mean? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for regulating unplanned-for portals? We have proven we know that if you facilitate cyber-transparently then you may also optimize magnetically.