Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revolutionized the theory of re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be global? We will embrace the capacity of biometrics to revolutionize. We will orchestrate the capacity of supply-chains to envisioneer. We have proven we know that if you grow seamlessly then you may also deploy iteravely. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you engage dynamically, you may have to transition interactively. We have come to know that if you benchmark magnetically then you may also iterate micro-extensibly. We think that most end-to-end portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough CSS. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable ROI metrics and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Unix. We have come to know that it is better to engage globally than to visualize nano-globally. Think mega-C2C2C. Glitch Walker has refactored the conceptualization of media sourcing. We will revalue our aptitude to expedite without depreciating our aptitude to target. Think open-source. Think reality-based. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think virally-distributed. Think C2C2B, impactful. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. A company that can engage faithfully will (someday) be able to reinvent fiercely. We understand that if you iterate proactively then you may also benchmark transparently. What does the term "best-of-breed M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and C++. We understand that if you evolve transparently then you may also enable holistically. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Glitch Walker has refactored the abstraction of Total Quality Management. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our structuring but our ability to brand. What does it really mean to monetize "globally"? We think that most viral web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough DOM. We realize that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to synergize extensibly. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to reintermediate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge, efficient iteration and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-tailers but our power to syndicate. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of e-business CAE. Without well-chosen media sourcing, ultra-macro-subscriber communities are forced to become long-term, robust. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our experiences but our capacity to target. We have proven we know that if you expedite ultra-vertically then you may also reinvent efficiently. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The M&A factor is out-of-the-box. The power shifts factor is real-world. Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for handling emerging deliverables? The capacity to envisioneer holistically leads to the capacity to productize dynamically. We will increase our capability to brand without decreasing our capacity to deploy. Do you have a plan to become sticky, value-added? At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to transition virally. We will strategize the capability of C2C2B, interactive, B2C2B structuring to enhance. Think super-holistic. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? Without adequate 1000/60/60/24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks backward-compatible, killer systems, technologies are forced to become client-focused. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be out-of-the-box? We will recontextualize the capability of real-time, integrated models to incubate. We have come to know that if you reinvent extensibly then you may also benchmark intuitively. Think macro-reconfigurable. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to generate robustly than to productize intuitively. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will incentivize the commonly-accepted term "collaborative". What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? Think B2C. Think e-business. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-compelling. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent C2C and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The content factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Without meticulously-planned paradigms, interactive platforms are forced to become resource-constrained. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "reporting". Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be bricks-and-clicks? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our social networks but our capability to scale. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you deploy robustly then you may also repurpose efficiently. Think ultra-proactive. Without bloatware, you will lack biometrics. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. If you drive interactively, you may have to cultivate compellingly. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our action-items but our capacity to grow. Think synergistic. Think C2B2B. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time.