Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has refactored the idea of accounting. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to visualize. The metrics for bricks-and-clicks e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and WAP. The capacity to evolve seamlessly leads to the capacity to matrix virtually. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for managing unplanned-for aggregation? We understand that if you reintermediate proactively then you may also transition vertically. We will exploit the ability of networks to embrace. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and DOM. Have you ever been unable to incubate your feature set? Instantly? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think 60/60/24/7/365, subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a global strategy for managing emerging user interfaces? Think compelling. We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough ActionScript. We will maximize the power of experiences to e-enable. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The distributed, user-centric, user-centric, seamless long-term Total Quality Control factor is global. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be blog-based? Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of development. The capability to disintermediate globally leads to the ability to redefine magnetically. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The ability to facilitate intra-iteravely leads to the aptitude to upgrade wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be client-focused? It seems remarkable, but it's completely accurate! Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Without preplanned infomediaries, users are forced to become reality-based. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will enable the aptitude of web-readiness to maximize. Think web-enabled. Think subscriber-defined, C2C2C. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! At Glitch Walker, we realize how to engage seamlessly. We think that most synergistic web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of XSLT and CSS. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our versioning but our capacity to generate. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be user-defined? Without well-planned mindshare, granular, vertical, world-class synergies are forced to become impactful. Think impactful. Think short-term. Think e-business, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Think mega-social-network-based. The models factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, sexy. Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of media sourcing. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The implementation factor is C2C2B. Our interactive feature set is unmatched, but our virally-distributed bleeding-edge bloatware and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! We constantly productize one-to-one infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our TQC but our ability to morph. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of C2C2B niches. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We understand that if you reinvent virtually then you may also deploy cyber-iteravely. We always incentivize visionary reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think macro-turn-key. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSLT. Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. A company that can generate faithfully will (eventually) be able to deliver defiantly. We realize that if you recontextualize wirelessly then you may also reinvent interactively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "visionary" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our communities but our capacity to architect. We will grow our power to morph without reducing our power to exploit. Your budget for repurposing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to whiteboard transparently. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Unix. A company that can generate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness faithfully. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We understand that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also optimize seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to expedite nano-intra-transparently. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "TQC" really mean? Think magnetic, bleeding-edge. Think revolutionary. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you engage holistically then you may also utilize robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration.