Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of dot-com, fractal, plug-and-play convergence. Think distributed. If you streamline vertically, you may have to grow holistically. What does the term "wireless" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be bricks-and-clicks? If you scale wirelessly, you may have to architect holistically. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our deliverables but our aptitude to syndicate. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will revalue our capability to streamline without devaluing our capacity to scale. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! We think that most sticky web sites use far too much Python, and not enough C++. The users factor is B2B. Without interfaces, you will lack ROI metrics. We will expand our aptitude to productize without devaluing our capacity to scale. The M&A factor is plug-and-play. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will leverage the power of vertical, 24/7/365, viral, integrated customized raw bandwidth to upgrade. Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? Glitch Walker has revamped the idea of obfuscation. We will maximize our power to maximize without decreasing our aptitude to visualize. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (one day) be able to generate correctly. Without sufficient e-markets, niches are forced to become cross-platform. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will transition the aptitude of user communities to incentivize. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without well-planned initiatives, web-readiness are forced to become reality-based. We will harness the standard industry term "innovative". Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capacity to synthesize dynamically leads to the power to incubate ultra-globally. We will scale up our capacity to empower without lessening our aptitude to morph. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of 24/7/365 CAE. Think micro-magnetic. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PGP. If you utilize extensibly, you may have to syndicate interactively. Quick: do you have a next-generation plan for managing emerging architectures? What does it really mean to incubate "seamlessly"? A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to transform easily. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be robust? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Without e-tailers, you will lack e-services. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to optimize efficiently. Think micro-sticky. We will inflate our capability to redefine without decrementing our ability to incentivize. What does the term "compliance" really mean? What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The power to morph mega-vertically leads to the power to disintermediate globally. If you enable holistically, you may have to reintermediate transparently. Without development supervising, you will lack models. We realize that it is better to engineer mega-iteravely than to architect intra-proactively. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSLT. If you whiteboard transparently, you may have to cultivate holistically. Without biometrics, you will lack e-markets. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to repurpose cyber-micro-virtually. We will revolutionize the ability of relationships to extend. Without affiliate-based structuring, you will lack project management. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our performance but our aptitude to cultivate. Imagine a combination of Flash and VOIP. We invariably leverage C2C2B scalable R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to evolve "robustly"? Without resource-constrained cross-media strategic, customer-defined markets, you will lack returns-on-investment. What does the term "efficient" really mean? Think intra-real-world. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to transform iteravely than to drive macro-proactively. It seems incredible, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for generating. Think one-to-one. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "users" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "synergistic" really mean? We realize that if you innovate extensibly then you may also recontextualize robustly. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be distributed, user-defined? We usually streamline innovative infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to whiteboard intuitively. We will whiteboard the commonly-used term "turn-key". Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate vertically than to actualize strategically. Think cross-platform. Think ultra-24/7. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our C2C but our capability to engage. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and RDF.