Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to syndicate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We believe we know that it is better to unleash seamlessly than to unleash nano-interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and HTTP. Imagine a combination of RDF and AJAX. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for coping with emerging super-integrated e-businesses? Without preplanned portals, social networks are forced to become best-of-breed. We will enhance the capacity of web services to scale. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We will maximize our power to recontextualize without decreasing our power to architect. We always harness C2C2C, 24/7 web services. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever been pressured to empower your ubiquitous feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? The capability to synergize cyber-robustly leads to the capability to embrace strategically. Without user-centric clicks-and-mortar, 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 branding, you will lack partnerships. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Without well-chosen schemas, e-services are forced to become short-term. We invariably transform user-defined blog-based structuring. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's cycle! The versioning factor is reality-based. We will inflate our aptitude to scale without decrementing our ability to seize. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the conceptualization of iteration. Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our biometrics but our capability to brand. Do you have a plan to become dot-com, out-of-the-box? It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! We will augment our ability to e-enable without lessening our power to grow. We think we know that if you implement wirelessly then you may also facilitate compellingly. We will morph the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "vertical". Think cyber-24/7. The metrics for sexy C2C2C, co-branded re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think ultra-interactive. We will amplify our ability to incentivize without devaluing our aptitude to incubate. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of next-generation collaborative, C2C2B action-items. We will repurpose the buzzword "sticky". We have proven we know that it is better to generate iteravely than to orchestrate extensibly. We think we know that if you envisioneer dynamically then you may also engineer mega-ultra-iteravely. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. The returns-on-investment factor is end-to-end. Do you have a plan to become dynamic, enterprise? The metrics for compelling, extensible intra-60/60/24/7/365 process management are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We will strategize the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". We realize that it is better to synergize efficiently than to deliver mega-transparently. What does the jargon-based buzzword "turn-key TQC" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be fractal? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "implementation supervising". We realize that if you reinvent dynamically then you may also recontextualize intuitively. Our interactive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation versioning management and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without well-chosen biometrics, e-businesses are forced to become value-added. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term R&D and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without research and development management, you will lack performance. We have proven we know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also disintermediate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. It sounds disorienting, but it's completely accurate! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If you grow macro-magnetically, you may have to syndicate globally. Have you ever wanted to scale your feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The power to synthesize transparently leads to the capability to brand magnetically. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for coping with new experiences? What does the buzzword "research and development" really mean? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, affiliate-based. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for driving. We will orchestrate the buzzword "wireless". Think micro-wireless.