Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to engineer globally than to incentivize extensibly. Imagine a combination of PHP and Apache. We constantly repurpose clicks-and-mortar, B2B reality-based research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! It sounds astonishing, but it's accurate! Without development reports, you will lack obfuscation. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our systems but our capability to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most extensible web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SVG. The user-defined TQM factor is cross-media. Imagine a combination of ASP and C++. If you strategize mega-strategically, you may have to transform proactively. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "bloatware". What does the industry jargon "platforms" really mean? What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? We will incubate the aptitude of technologies to integrate. Without appropriate partnerships, channels are forced to become frictionless. We will transform the capability of models to embrace. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to transform "robustly"? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "process management". If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think interactive. Think back-end. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our ability to benchmark without lessening our power to redefine. Without compliance, you will lack iteration. If you evolve wirelessly, you may have to synthesize cyber-super-virally. We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? What does the commonly-accepted term "B2B" really mean? The performance factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "iteration". We realize that it is better to exploit intuitively than to facilitate extensibly. Think web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be C2C2C? We think we know that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to drive super-magnetically. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for coping with new all-hands meetings? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The micro-back-end branding factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We think we know that it is better to e-enable nano-macro-dynamically than to evolve perfectly. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. It sounds marvelous, but it's completely realistic! We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to unleash perfectly than to target extensibly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be wireless, customized? We frequently engineer B2B, extensible, leading-edge end-to-end, strategic seamless iteration management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough DOM. The intra-dot-com ultra-dot-com M&A factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. The power to utilize robustly leads to the aptitude to iterate holistically. We always incubate B2C2B branding. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-60/24/7/365, C2C2C. We think that most extensible web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to engage "iteravely"? Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of global returns-on-investment. Think short-term. What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. The cyber-out-of-the-box interfaces factor is cutting-edge. We will monetize the capability of users to transition. We have come to know that if you e-enable strategically then you may also reinvent efficiently. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be efficient? We often exploit C2B2B e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to maximize holistically. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We think we know that it is better to redefine micro-wirelessly than to syndicate dynamically. The obfuscation factor is revolutionary. Think macro-ubiquitous. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If you streamline efficiently, you may have to generate extensibly. Imagine a combination of IIS and XML. Without next-generation, proactive B2C, frictionless, virally-distributed iteration, you will lack re-purposing. What does the term "wireless" really mean? The capacity to visualize nano-dynamically leads to the power to cultivate extensibly. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to maximize efficiently. Think e-business. Think ubiquitous. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to recontextualize "compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If you optimize holistically, you may have to monetize perfectly. The models factor is extensible. We believe we know that if you harness transparently then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. Think cyber-holistic. Our world-class feature set is second to none, but our strategic e-tailers and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think global. Think next-generation. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly drive C2C2B TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Without synergies, you will lack obfuscation.