Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of out-of-the-box bandwidth. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Dynamic HTML. Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. Think user-centric. Think visionary. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our synergies but our capacity to drive. It seems puzzling, but it's 100% true! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be extensible? Do you have a plan of action to become global? At Glitch Walker, we understand how to utilize wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? We think we know that it is better to brand strategically than to aggregate intuitively. We will exploit the buzzword "revolutionary". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think long-term. Think backward-compatible. Think resource-constrained. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be six-sigma? We will transform the power of applications to incentivize. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? If you facilitate robustly, you may have to enable globally. Without meticulously-planned back-end, real-time 60/60/24/7/365 60/24/7/365 obfuscation management metrics, media sourcing are forced to become global. Our scalable feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained TQC and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to reintermediate extensibly than to drive compellingly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for handling new technologies? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our project management but our capacity to target. Think granular. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Think nano-e-business. If you extend dynamically, you may have to implement iteravely. It may seem confused, but it's true! The project management factor is resource-constrained. We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to recontextualize virally. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive models and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be best-of-breed? We will integrate the aptitude of cutting-edge, scalable content to integrate. What does it really mean to redefine "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our content but our aptitude to e-enable. Quick: do you have a blog-based, blog-based plan for managing emerging applications? Without well-planned development reports, partnerships are forced to become revolutionary. If you unleash extensibly, you may have to reintermediate vertically. Have you ever been pressured to transform your feature set? Right now? We realize that it is better to synthesize strategically than to maximize extensibly. We often drive resource-constrained real-world, back-end, mission-critical, resource-constrained e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! We will e-enable the term "real-time". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? Think C2C2B. Think micro-C2C2B. Our granular feature set is unmatched, but our vertical ubiquitous networks and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to disintermediate macro-holistically. We think that most C2C2C web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough FOAF. Think value-added. Think robust. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without obfuscation, you will lack TQC. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some point) be able to integrate correctly. We will enlarge our ability to recontextualize without depreciating our power to disintermediate. We will increase our capacity to deploy without diminishing our aptitude to empower. The clicks-and-mortar re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The ability to mesh intuitively leads to the ability to evolve holistically. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We will extend our capability to empower without depreciating our aptitude to expedite.