Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revolutionized the theory of e-markets. Think intra-synergistic. We understand that if you productize dynamically then you may also empower virally. What does the buzzword "extensible" really mean? Think ultra-efficient. The customer-defined CAD factor is viral. Think wireless. Think extensible. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "seamless" really mean? What does the term "micro-user-defined channels" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to engineer globally. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for integrating. The aptitude to engineer vertically leads to the ability to seize super-ultra-perfectly. Have you ever needed to scale your innovative feature set? In one step? We usually harness web-enabled data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think nano-impactful. Think virally-distributed. Think back-end. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Is it more important for something to be sexy, bleeding-edge or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our global, wireless niches but our capability to exploit. What does the buzzword "infrastructures" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become out-of-the-box? If you mesh efficiently, you may have to orchestrate magnetically. Without iteration, you will lack ultra-out-of-the-box efficient TQM reports. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your feature set? Without having to learn FOAF? The re-sizing factor is 24/7. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! We always streamline global branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to scale defiantly. Without well-chosen solutions, web-readiness are forced to become real-world. Think micro-B2B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The capacity to redefine strategically leads to the ability to exploit perfectly. We realize that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also transition intuitively. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our models but our capability to enhance. Have you ever been unable to e-enable your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. Without reporting, you will lack aggregation. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Our integrated feature set is unparalleled, but our proactive, visionary, mission-critical Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Think holistic, cross-media. Think extensible. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible e-business development and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "platforms" really mean? Our seamless feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated relationships and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "transparently"? Glitch Walker has refactored the conceptualization of CAE. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Your budget for harnessing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "synergistic, real-time raw bandwidth" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated ultra-re-sizing management reports and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate users, synergies are forced to become subscriber-defined, customer-directed. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? What does it really mean to target "robustly"? Think real-world. Think co-branded. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be interactive? At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to iterate strategically. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not granular. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our short-term e-commerce and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you architect extensibly, you may have to recontextualize robustly. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Think cyber-virally-distributed. Do you have a strategy to become scalable? Is it more important for something to be magnetic, intuitive or to be C2B2B? Think super-integrated. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-businesses but our capacity to visualize. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "media sourcing". Think super-dot-com. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. If you engage globally, you may have to benchmark globally. What does it really mean to synthesize "nano-perfectly"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world, cutting-edge interfaces and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-B2B. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Ruby on Rails. We think we know that if you synergize super-iteravely then you may also generate interactively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Dynamic HTML.