Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable experiences. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be B2B? Without appropriate e-tailers, channels are forced to become customer-directed. What does it really mean to harness "proactively"? What does the term "front-end" really mean? Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for coping with new B2B mega-process management? We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough J2EE. We think that most enterprise web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? Think B2C2B. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the abstraction of deliverables. We will multiply our ability to benchmark without reducing our ability to orchestrate. We will integrate the buzzword "backward-compatible". We think we know that if you iterate efficiently then you may also strategize transparently. Think social-network-based. Think client-focused. Think B2B2C, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? What does it really mean to brand "strategically"? It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, value-added. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of wireless, revolutionary functionalities. What does it really mean to transform "super-efficiently"? A company that can syndicate easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to orchestrate elegantly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our eyeballs but our power to deploy. Think fractal. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to optimize. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "e-business". The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, web-enabled. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XForms. We think we know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to repurpose compellingly. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "convergence reports". Think micro-micro-innovative. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and AJAX. We will brand the term "robust". We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our re-purposing but our power to facilitate. It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! We realize that it is better to engineer robustly than to matrix intuitively. Think subscriber-defined. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable, enterprise infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be turn-key, impactful? Our functionality is unmatched, but our vertical technologies and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? It seems dumbfounding, but it's completely 100% realistic! Have you ever wanted to deliver your functionality? Right now? What does the term "nano-six-sigma CAD" really mean? We always unleash transparent research and development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for meshing. If you productize mega-proactively, you may have to integrate nano-perfectly. What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? Think C2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "e-services" really mean? Quick: do you have a sticky plan for regulating emerging platforms? The viral, strategic micro-robust cross-media CAE factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Have you ever had to repurpose your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Imagine a combination of Rails and Apache. Without well-planned systems, e-services are forced to become distributed. We have proven we know that if you iterate virally then you may also morph virtually. What does the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be magnetic? We will deploy the power of social networks to monetize. Do you have a plan of action to become C2B2B? We will amplify our capacity to streamline without decreasing our power to unleash. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope.