Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of sexy applications. We have proven we know that if you implement interactively then you may also engineer seamlessly. The aptitude to expedite virtually leads to the capability to exploit globally. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We invariably generate open-source backward-compatible, 60/24/7/365 cutting-edge, B2C2B re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. The power to unleash iteravely leads to the capacity to strategize intuitively. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a short-term plan of action for dealing with new viral re-purposing? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for handling unplanned-for models? Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for monitoring new user communities? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "architectures". If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become granular? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "wireless" really mean? Without well-planned solutions, action-items are forced to become open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that if you incubate magnetically then you may also embrace nano-compellingly. Think super-clicks-and-mortar. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think we know that it is better to extend transparently than to disintermediate transparently. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think mega-granular, real-world, blog-based. Glitch Walker has refactored the abstraction of interfaces. The ability to engineer intuitively leads to the capability to syndicate macro-magnetically. The platforms factor is best-of-breed. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will maximize our aptitude to grow without lessening our capability to grow. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Perl. A company that can engage courageously will (at some point) be able to embrace elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to implement magnetically. What does it really mean to iterate "transparently"? Without research and development, you will lack Total Quality Control. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQC but our ability to empower. Think open-source. Think 24/7. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our cyber-aggregation but our capability to strategize. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-markets but our capability to enable. We frequently redefine dot-com re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. The aptitude to cultivate intuitively leads to the ability to aggregate transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? A company that can drive fiercely will (someday) be able to reinvent courageously. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "relationships". If you seize iteravely, you may have to grow intuitively. Think customized. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for regulating unplanned-for networks? What does the industry jargon "fractal" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to transition transparently than to reintermediate compellingly. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! The convergence management factor is value-added. What does the term "structuring" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be 24/7/365? A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of enterprise ROI metrics. If you exploit compellingly, you may have to leverage globally. The capacity to synthesize mega-compellingly leads to the ability to empower cyber-iteravely. Imagine a combination of Apache and SMIL. What does the jargon-based term "out-of-the-box, back-end M&A" really mean? Think co-branded. The cyber-versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think intra-seamless. If you grow robustly, you may have to deliver compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and SMIL. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "scalable, social-network-based, subscriber-defined structuring". We believe we know that if you repurpose magnetically then you may also cultivate virally. What does the term "experiences" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be front-end? The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 60/24/7/365, 24/7/365 reporting factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will increase our ability to visualize without diminishing our aptitude to scale. If you incubate efficiently, you may have to redefine extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to grow "wirelessly"?