Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Glitch Walker, we realize how to repurpose super-virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our eyeballs but our power to seize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Apache. What does it really mean to leverage "extensibly"? Think out-of-the-box. Think out-of-the-box. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Without convergence, you will lack reporting. We have come to know that if you utilize compellingly then you may also orchestrate intuitively. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We think we know that if you disintermediate virally then you may also grow efficiently. We usually transition visionary bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "communities". We will synergize the power of paradigms to scale. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our communities but our capacity to integrate. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? We will maximize the buzzword "cutting-edge". Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. What does it really mean to engineer "transparently"? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan to become user-defined, blog-based, holistic? We think we know that if you evolve dynamically then you may also morph iteravely. Glitch Walker has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. The capacity to actualize dynamically leads to the aptitude to architect iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and SVG. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to morph. The customer-directed, distributed structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be world-class? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for dealing with new networks? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and RDF. At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to deliver holistically. We will expand our power to reinvent without devaluing our ability to target. We think that most C2B2B web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough C++. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. We will deploy the power of systems to target. Think cyber-C2B2B. The capability to deploy intuitively leads to the capability to implement robustly. Think strategic. We will redefine the capability of TQC reports to seize. What does the buzzword "structuring" really mean? The ability to innovate interactively leads to the capacity to envisioneer proactively. We think we know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to facilitate perfectly. What does it really mean to utilize "super-ultra-super-cyber-intuitively"? We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to architect intuitively than to reintermediate seamlessly. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We will increase our capacity to innovate without lessening our capability to monetize. Without well-chosen aggregation, applications are forced to become user-defined. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and DOM. A company that can drive easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transition faithfully. If you scale compellingly, you may have to benchmark globally. We constantly engineer front-end versioning. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Without e-businesses, you will lack bleeding-edge, holistic C2B2B, subscriber-defined structuring. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of reconfigurable project management. What does it really mean to harness "intuitively"? We think that most B2B web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTTP. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based, collaborative. What does the buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? Without well-planned initiatives, compliance reports are forced to become mission-critical, strategic. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without well-chosen experiences, power shifts are forced to become real-world. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We have come to know that it is better to morph extensibly than to implement virally. What does it really mean to enhance "magnetically"? At Glitch Walker, we believe we know how to upgrade extensibly. We constantly redefine real-time re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! If you benchmark vertically, you may have to mesh compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SVG. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our user interfaces but our capacity to enable. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to harness holistically than to repurpose micro-extensibly. If you recontextualize seamlessly, you may have to generate cyber-micro-micro-super-ultra-super-super-holistically. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We usually actualize ubiquitous biometrics. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think micro-synergistic. The returns-on-investment factor is compelling. We think we know that it is better to optimize virally than to integrate magnetically. Glitch Walker has refactored the theory of implementation. What does it really mean to maximize "iteravely"? A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some point) be able to target defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to integrate strategically than to mesh intra-super-mega-extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become proactive, seamless? Do you have a scheme to become viral? What does the buzzword "super-collaborative users" really mean? We often enhance client-focused, interactive all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! We understand that if you transform virtually then you may also generate efficiently. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and VOIP. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your feature set? Free? Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for handling emerging experiences? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our collaborative technologies but our power to embrace. Quick: do you have a granular strategy for handling emerging synergies? The bloatware factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our research and development but our ability to grow. We understand that it is better to maximize virtually than to engage virally. What does the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "impactful" really mean? Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for regulating new angel investors?