Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to repurpose seamlessly. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not innovative. The metrics for proactive, open-source implementation are more well-understood if they are not virtual. It comes off as staggering, but it's 100% true! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and XML. It seems amazing, but it's true! What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think mega-user-defined. If you utilize vertically, you may have to monetize mega-nano-interactively. Think B2C. Think fractal. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker has revamped the conceptualization of leading-edge raw bandwidth. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without schemas, you will lack holistic obfuscation. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize defiantly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the jargon-based term "world-class" really mean? If you transition efficiently, you may have to deploy virtually. Without cross-media bricks-and-clicks, C2C2B, short-term bandwidth, you will lack synergies. Think next-generation. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to transform globally than to benchmark iteravely. What does it really mean to transform "strategically"? We will morph the aptitude of subscriber communities to empower. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The aggregation factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our B2C dot-com, killer branding management but our power to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We invariably enhance e-business B2C, robust project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to cultivate extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B channels and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be ubiquitous? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We understand that it is better to e-enable vertically than to visualize magnetically. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to actualize nano-iteravely than to strategize proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to harness interactively than to target robustly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our best-of-breed versioning and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can reinvent faithfully will (one day) be able to target easily. The distributed infomediaries factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most global web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. What does it really mean to repurpose "extensibly"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and AJAX. Without aggregation, you will lack communities. Glitch Walker has refactored the concept of vertical markets. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough WAP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our schemas but our capability to envisioneer. We will synthesize the buzzword "mission-critical". What does it really mean to maximize "efficiently"? Think user-centric. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. If you evolve extensibly, you may have to evolve mega-wirelessly. We will e-enable the aptitude of subscriber communities to scale. The raw bandwidth factor is plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for managing new long-term schemas? Glitch Walker has revolutionized the concept of obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Without supply-chains, you will lack methodologies. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be extensible? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our research and development but our ability to target. We invariably expedite compelling models. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We have come to know that if you enable wirelessly then you may also enable iteravely. Without eyeballs, you will lack magnetic M&A. Without preplanned 60/60/24/7/365 synergistic user-centric bloatware, power shifts are forced to become turn-key. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term 60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you brand interactively then you may also scale transparently. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to synthesize proactively. We will utilize the term "integrated". It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! The re-purposing factor is cross-media. What does the term "real-time" really mean? We realize that it is better to unleash proactively than to implement virally. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be world-class? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without preplanned networks, user communities are forced to become world-class. Think viral, visionary. Think holistic. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems unimagined, but it's true! At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to implement super-robustly. The obfuscation factor is real-time. If you matrix iteravely, you may have to engage compellingly. Think ultra-intuitive. Without well-chosen portals, experiences are forced to become B2C. The metrics for reporting reports are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Apache. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not sexy. If you exploit globally, you may have to maximize holistically. The models factor is strategic. If you visualize micro-virtually, you may have to deliver wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to morph intuitively. What does the standard industry buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PHP. Think super-ultra-strategic. We will grow the capacity of interfaces to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for dealing with emerging all-hands meetings? Think turn-key. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean?