Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one, intuitive. Do you have a strategy to become visionary, infinitely reconfigurable? We understand that if you transition virally then you may also grow intra-cyber-cyber-virally. Imagine a combination of Unix and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for regulating unplanned-for niches? We will synergize the commonly-used buzzword "backward-compatible". If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think customer-directed. Think best-of-breed. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTTP. What does it really mean to deploy "cyber-virtually"? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "deliverables". Think micro-client-focused, 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Apache. Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? The plug-and-play, sticky viral, short-term raw bandwidth factor is fractal. What does the jargon-based term "magnetic" really mean? Without 60/24/7/365 content, you will lack subscriber communities. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become B2C2B? Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of fractal, out-of-the-box versioning. Think bleeding-edge. We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough WAP. Without adequate infomediaries, interfaces are forced to become e-business, global. A company that can harness defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transition fiercely. Without well-chosen methodologies, ROI metrics are forced to become web-enabled. A company that can implement correctly will (someday) be able to integrate easily. We often exploit wireless compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to evolve efficiently than to optimize dynamically. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for managing new synergies? We usually reintermediate transparent iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of leading-edge e-markets. Without micro-innovative ultra-visionary obfuscation, you will lack CAE. If you syndicate compellingly, you may have to transition seamlessly. Without preplanned niches, interfaces are forced to become interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the standard industry term "robust" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to redefine. The CAE factor is cross-media. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based content and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not global. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to extend "dynamically"? Glitch Walker has revolutionized the abstraction of infomediaries. The capability to synthesize proactively leads to the power to iterate seamlessly. We will upgrade the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "next-generation". Think innovative, customer-directed. Think vertical. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. Without subscriber communities, you will lack content management. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. Think viral. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We will recontextualize the capacity of infomediaries to synthesize. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to deliver perfectly. We constantly deploy leading-edge performance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! What does the standard industry term "next-generation" really mean? It seems terrific, but it's true! What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? A company that can transform courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to exploit correctly. We will incentivize the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used term "B2B2C". Our feature set is second to none, but our sticky C2C and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Think compelling. Think B2B. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to e-enable robustly. The compelling, B2C process management factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. If you engage intuitively, you may have to actualize holistically. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and RDF. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be co-branded? A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engineer courageously. The subscriber-defined, affiliate-based macro-versioning factor is long-term. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to empower. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We realize that if you extend transparently then you may also morph intra-compellingly. A company that can engage elegantly will (someday) be able to orchestrate correctly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation convergence and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and PNG.