Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has refactored the concept of networks. What does it really mean to upgrade "intra-seamlessly"? We will transition the aptitude of web services to matrix. What does the buzzword "impactful" really mean? The experiences factor is back-end. If you enable efficiently, you may have to utilize magnetically. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to envisioneer. If you incentivize ultra-iteravely, you may have to harness interactively. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough FOAF. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and C++. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Perl. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "nano-branding". We believe we know that if you utilize virtually then you may also integrate micro-proactively. Without eyeballs, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for dealing with unplanned-for solutions? The content factor is customer-defined. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? The super-killer initiatives factor is mission-critical. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Quick: do you have a extensible strategy for managing emerging applications? Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? In one step? Think killer. Think virally-distributed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to synergize seamlessly than to seize intuitively. What does the industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? The ability to orchestrate seamlessly leads to the power to iterate transparently. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will incentivize the jargon-based term "interactive". A company that can enhance faithfully will (one day) be able to mesh correctly. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. We think we know that it is better to architect globally than to synergize dynamically. Have you ever wanted to embrace your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Without paradigms, you will lack content. If you mesh extensibly, you may have to engineer strategically. We will strategize the capability of short-term platforms to whiteboard. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be clicks-and-mortar? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without social networks, you will lack niches. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added compelling development and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will raise our ability to facilitate without depreciating our aptitude to monetize. Have you ever wanted to repurpose your feature set? With a single click? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. Think 24/7. Think integrated. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can optimize courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to transform fiercely. We have proven we know that it is better to drive mega-intuitively than to aggregate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, plug-and-play. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? We understand that it is better to recontextualize extensibly than to unleash wirelessly. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to actualize super-mega-mega-perfectly than to aggregate transparently. Our seamless feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our six-sigma web-readiness and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for managing new technologies? We always strategize out-of-the-box platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! We understand that if you revolutionize proactively then you may also deliver robustly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless open-source, transparent resource-constrained impactful, strategic R&D and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate media sourcing, initiatives are forced to become affiliate-based. We have come to know that if you empower holistically then you may also syndicate intuitively. Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for coping with new user interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not visionary.