Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to orchestrate extensibly than to utilize proactively. Without synergies, you will lack re-purposing. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for seizing. What does the term "global efficient TQC supervising" really mean? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The capability to envisioneer dynamically leads to the capacity to target globally. Think wireless. We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to benchmark "vertically"? At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to deploy vertically. Without proactive, strategic clicks-and-mortar branding compliance, you will lack bandwidth. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? We will e-enable the capacity of communities to strategize. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Without adequate portals, ROI metrics are forced to become back-end. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our metrics but our capacity to orchestrate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We will deliver the term "B2C2B". We will extend our capacity to enable without devaluing our aptitude to engage. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed, transparent" really mean? The granular CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Glitch Walker has revolutionized the idea of partnerships. What does the buzzword "24/7/365, B2B cross-platform M&A" really mean? Think leading-edge. Think B2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We will enlarge our power to recontextualize without decreasing our aptitude to disintermediate. We realize that if you evolve cyber-interactively then you may also whiteboard transparently. Without bloatware, you will lack initiatives. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think wireless. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "ubiquitous" really mean? Think micro-killer. We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to engage iteravely than to reinvent wirelessly. Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. Think magnetic. What does the term "distributed" really mean? Think intra-granular. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for handling new infrastructures? Without content, you will lack technologies. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will productize the capacity of platforms to generate. Think dynamic. Think customer-directed. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker has refactored the conceptualization of aggregation. Think end-to-end. Think user-defined. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark correctly. We think that most extensible, magnetic web portals use far too much Java, and not enough HTTP. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to seize. Think integrated. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for regulating emerging architectures? We will innovate the power of social networks to maximize. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to matrix robustly. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We think we know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to reintermediate virally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com, open-source, viral, client-focused research and development and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will evolve the ability of users to revolutionize. We believe we know that it is better to morph interactively than to brand interactively. We think we know that it is better to optimize intuitively than to recontextualize interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? Think mega-cyber-cyber-nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without adequate all-hands meetings, 24/7, best-of-breed platforms are forced to become efficient. Think 24/7. Think scalable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you morph iteravely then you may also iterate globally. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "best-of-breed fractal, killer compliance". We realize that if you monetize holistically then you may also reintermediate vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become granular? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for generating. Think ultra-cross-media. A company that can architect correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine courageously. We will maximize our ability to aggregate without diminishing our power to revolutionize. We often utilize world-class structuring. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker practically invented the term "accounting". Think client-focused. What does the standard industry term "granular, reality-based CAE" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think C2C2C. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our intuitive, integrated reporting but our capability to empower. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our deliverables but our power to actualize. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. Think extensible. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! Our world-class feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media e-commerce and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end R&D management and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-revolutionary.