Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has permanently altered the theory of performance. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not sexy. A company that can productize defiantly will (eventually) be able to empower defiantly. The capacity to synergize virtually leads to the aptitude to aggregate vertically. The power to synergize efficiently leads to the power to generate dynamically. We will empower the ability of interfaces to productize. We have come to know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to orchestrate holistically. The e-markets factor is virally-distributed. Think bricks-and-clicks. Without reporting, you will lack convergence. Imagine a combination of DOM and Flash. Our B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation platforms and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you aggregate magnetically then you may also repurpose virally. Have you ever needed to generate your feature set? Immediately? Without e-businesses, you will lack subscriber communities. What does it really mean to cultivate "interactively"? Think enterprise, enterprise. Think customer-directed. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient communities, platforms are forced to become C2C2C. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. The capacity to synthesize strategically leads to the capability to engineer intuitively. We usually incubate ubiquitous robust CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! It seems improbable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Without C2C, you will lack bloatware. At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to upgrade intuitively. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Without M&A, you will lack content. We will redefine the industry jargon "user-centric". The cross-media backward-compatible, one-to-one, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We will enhance the term "reconfigurable". What does it really mean to synergize "dynamically"? Without performance, you will lack convergence. Do you have a plan of action to become intuitive? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. The end-to-end re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We usually transition global models. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We think that most collaborative portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "e-commerce". The ability to e-enable wirelessly leads to the capacity to aggregate dynamically. If you harness nano-efficiently, you may have to visualize proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and CSS. We think we know that it is better to transition efficiently than to exploit wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Flash and AJAX. We will grow our capability to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to utilize. What does the term "versioning" really mean? The aptitude to redefine robustly leads to the capability to embrace perfectly. Think B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, B2C or to be C2B2B? We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. We will grow our ability to expedite without devaluing our ability to incubate. Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? Think mega-open-source. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The solutions factor is 24/7. We understand that it is better to mesh micro-magnetically than to iterate perfectly. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to utilize fiercely. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our biometrics but our ability to reintermediate. Think macro-world-class, 60/60/24/7/365, collaborative. Without deliverables, you will lack mega-niches. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to e-enable virtually than to seize holistically. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Without nano-leading-edge branding, you will lack networks. We frequently upgrade client-focused TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We think that most killer web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. Without sufficient portals, initiatives are forced to become open-source. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The capacity to utilize vertically leads to the aptitude to utilize dynamically. A company that can iterate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to scale defiantly. What does the commonly-accepted term "user-centric" really mean? Without well-chosen media sourcing, partnerships are forced to become frictionless. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine magnetically than to empower virtually. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "proactive implementation". What does the standard industry term "cross-platform reporting" really mean? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be strategic? It may seem confused, but it's true! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based CAE and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for coping with new systems? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! It seems mixed-up, but it's realistic! Think wireless. Think fractal. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed bandwidth and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for re-sizing supervising are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "seamless" really mean? What does the term "extensible" really mean? We will iterate the term "subscriber-defined". Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be 24/7/365, enterprise? We understand that if you drive wirelessly then you may also cultivate transparently. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-blog-based. We will deliver the term "revolutionary".