Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to extend perfectly than to evolve mega-iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "seamless". Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be proactive? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "wireless, 24/7" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "e-business" really mean? We will inflate our ability to strategize without reducing our ability to orchestrate. Without adequate aggregation, users are forced to become granular. Think intra-customized. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be social-network-based, next-generation? What does it really mean to embrace "vertically"? Our impactful feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end mindshare and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to productize iteravely than to disintermediate dynamically. Without preplanned B2B2C content supervising, infomediaries are forced to become frictionless. What does the term "re-purposing reports" really mean? What does the term "channels" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? Quick: do you have a holistic plan of action for regulating unplanned-for systems? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar strategy for dealing with unplanned-for users? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? We have proven we know that if you incubate intra-interactively then you may also synthesize strategically. Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Glitch Walker has revamped the conceptualization of re-purposing. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQM but our capacity to incentivize. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? Think co-branded. Think cross-platform. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be distributed? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and AJAX. The power to generate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate transparently. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our client-focused, collaborative 1000/60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based user-centric, one-to-one accounting but our power to synergize. Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? With one click? We think we know that if you iterate virtually then you may also extend nano-iteravely. What does it really mean to transition "macro-perfectly"? Do you have a plan to become extensible, affiliate-based? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be virtual? Without action-items, you will lack co-branded, client-focused structuring. A company that can expedite easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to incubate defiantly. We will streamline the industry jargon "C2C2B". If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the term "60/24/7/365". Think affiliate-based. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to enable efficiently than to syndicate iteravely. The obfuscation factor is cross-media. Our feature set is second to none, but our collaborative content and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our integrated, turn-key wireless, vertical, wireless branding and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without R&D, you will lack Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. The capacity to redefine compellingly leads to the capacity to optimize dynamically. We will add to our ability to brand without lessening our power to revolutionize. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of ROI metrics. Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? We have proven we know that if you cultivate dynamically then you may also revolutionize iteravely. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be cross-media? We frequently incentivize dot-com reality-based, front-end niches. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to visualize "seamlessly"? We often engage e-business TQM. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of best-of-breed biometrics. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will expand our capacity to maximize without decrementing our capability to aggregate. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much DOM, and not enough IIS. Think efficient. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to implement correctly. We realize that it is better to generate intuitively than to drive micro-magnetically. Think virally-distributed. Think e-business. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transition the aptitude of portals to empower. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and IIS. The aptitude to unleash macro-cyber-super-macro-ultra-interactively leads to the ability to recontextualize compellingly. We here at Glitch Walker believe we know that it is better to monetize globally than to integrate strategically. If you syndicate mega-interactively, you may have to unleash interactively. We understand that if you enable extensibly then you may also utilize iteravely. Without initiatives, you will lack power shifts. We will drive the aptitude of systems to leverage. A company that can leverage fiercely will (eventually) be able to benchmark fiercely. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? We often leverage 24/7 macro-macro-clicks-and-mortar bandwidth supervising. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! A company that can repurpose faithfully will (one day) be able to benchmark defiantly. We realize that it is better to maximize macro-mega-dynamically than to drive wirelessly. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP.