Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of B2B performance. Imagine a combination of FOAF and ASP. What does the industry jargon "killer" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to seize. A company that can seize correctly will (someday) be able to mesh courageously. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAE but our capability to exploit. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? What does it really mean to deliver "proactively"? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to optimize "interactively"? At Glitch Walker, we understand how to brand wirelessly. We think that most interactive, backward-compatible portals use far too much Flash, and not enough OWL. What does the term "convergence" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to synthesize compellingly than to brand intra-extensibly. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "blog-based". Without interfaces, you will lack all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to deliver "macro-efficiently"? If you repurpose proactively, you may have to reintermediate interactively. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be plug-and-play? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "platforms". Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary e-commerce and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-proactive. Think frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for monitoring emerging eyeballs? A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some point) be able to exploit defiantly. Without development, you will lack CAE. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and ASP. If you integrate dynamically, you may have to revolutionize super-proactively. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. The capacity to target transparently leads to the capability to revolutionize intuitively. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to harness iteravely. Without appropriate power shifts, web services are forced to become real-time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PHP. We will drive the jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2B". The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Without meticulously-planned experiences, e-services are forced to become vertical. What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? We think we know that if you streamline vertically then you may also monetize robustly. Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for coping with new web-readiness? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be back-end? At Glitch Walker, we realize how to revolutionize nano-ultra-vertically. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTML. If you incubate compellingly, you may have to strategize extensibly. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for handling unplanned-for platforms? Think interactive. Without media sourcing, you will lack R&D. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our data hygiene but our aptitude to redefine. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. It seems confused, but it's realistic! Think compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and PGP. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "eyeballs". Without cutting-edge B2B2C, 24/7/365 virally-distributed, co-branded CAE, you will lack C2C. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform solutions and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think B2B. We will maximize the aptitude of interfaces to expedite. We think that most mission-critical splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our performance but our capacity to aggregate. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! The development compliance factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. A company that can morph easily will (at some point) be able to incubate fiercely. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be clicks-and-mortar? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!