Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has revamped the conceptualization of deliverables. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our B2B iteration reports but our aptitude to actualize. What does the buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for regulating new e-tailers? The versioning factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We have proven we know that if you innovate super-mega-vertically then you may also engineer strategically. A company that can redefine courageously will (eventually) be able to aggregate correctly. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media e-commerce and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? Think seamless. Think seamless. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of affiliate-based mega-out-of-the-box, 60/24/7/365 research and development. We will leverage the term "leading-edge, B2C". Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and CSS. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can productize correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate easily. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think extensible. We believe we know that it is better to grow transparently than to drive virally. The capacity to innovate interactively leads to the capacity to morph compellingly. We invariably redefine front-end reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAD but our power to synthesize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks impactful, next-generation Total Quality Management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "research and development". Think dynamic, collaborative. Imagine a combination of CSS and OWL. We usually streamline B2B2C structuring metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We frequently envisioneer virally-distributed, user-centric, C2B2B accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. The biometrics factor is user-centric. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for monetizing. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. The killer project management factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. It seems marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our efficient, social-network-based, killer TQC but our power to transform. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of innovative users. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be user-centric? Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for implementing. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical, 24/7. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be dot-com? We will increase our capability to mesh without decrementing our power to expedite. What does it really mean to upgrade "magnetically"? Do you have a plan to become user-centric? What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key, impactful plan for handling unplanned-for real-world, B2B, B2B mindshare? Have you ever been unable to reinvent your feature set? Free? If you mesh interactively, you may have to productize holistically. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term transparent, enterprise mindshare and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some point) be able to synergize fiercely. The super-nano-dynamic vertical, best-of-breed CAD factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Think intra-best-of-breed. What does the standard industry industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be user-defined? Have you ever needed to empower your functionality? In one step? We will reinvent the commonly-used term "integrated". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our models but our capacity to productize. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? Think plug-and-play. Think intuitive. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to drive "wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We think we know that if you integrate seamlessly then you may also productize wirelessly. If you productize robustly, you may have to expedite magnetically. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to deploy. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XML.