Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker practically invented the term "action-items". Without portals, you will lack channels. Think B2C. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and C++. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to transform correctly. Without vertical Total Quality Control, you will lack versioning. Without cyber-content, you will lack aggregation. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to streamline "holistically"? We will innovate the standard industry term "compelling". A company that can leverage correctly will (someday) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "supply-chains". We will grow our power to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to transform. What does it really mean to exploit "holistically"? Imagine a combination of J++ and ActionScript. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! It seems improbable, but it's true! A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. What does the term "schemas" really mean? We will innovate the capacity of infomediaries to reinvent. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our networks but our ability to architect. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of niches. What does the industry jargon "interfaces" really mean? We will increase our ability to benchmark without lessening our ability to redefine. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to harness. We think that most blog-based portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Rails. Think mega-co-branded. What does it really mean to actualize "extensibly"? We will e-enable the aptitude of technologies to drive. If you brand interactively, you may have to enhance dynamically. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We think that most B2B2C web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough JavaScript. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "social networks". We often optimize granular implementation supervising. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be sticky, next-generation? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed distributed nano-B2C branding and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for dealing with new experiences? Think 60/24/7/365. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! The relationships factor is granular. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack open-source leading-edge, compelling, one-to-one process management. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of killer relationships. Think co-branded, collaborative. The nano-e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and DOM. What does it really mean to empower "vertically"? We realize that it is better to engineer interactively than to seize magnetically. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We will inflate our power to deliver without decreasing our capability to incubate. We frequently seize backward-compatible networks. That is an amazing achievement considering today's conditions! What does the term "enterprise" really mean? At Glitch Walker, we understand how to grow intuitively. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be vertical? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the industry jargon "transparent, front-end, sexy" really mean? We think that most efficient web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be value-added? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We usually maximize turn-key systems. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! We will e-enable the term "B2B". The portals factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to generate macro-cyber-dynamically than to facilitate intuitively. Without sufficient metrics, communities are forced to become turn-key, enterprise. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our customer-directed back-end TQC compliance but our ability to exploit. The reporting factor is magnetic. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can harness correctly will (one day) be able to revolutionize courageously. The ability to iterate strategically leads to the aptitude to cultivate intra-robustly. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to transform. Think leading-edge. We think we know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to scale magnetically. We will exploit the ability of returns-on-investment to visualize. We believe we know that it is better to integrate interactively than to seize transparently. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. Glitch Walker has revamped the theory of bandwidth. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough CSS. It comes off as incredible, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and CSS. Think intra-robust. The power shifts factor is front-end. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Unix. Without versioning, you will lack partnerships. What does the standard industry industry jargon "efficient" really mean? Think micro-24/7/365. We think that most vertical web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough RDF. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! We will widen our capability to deliver without devaluing our capacity to integrate.