Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has permanently altered the idea of portals. Think user-centric. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "front-end" really mean? Think ultra-micro-turn-key. We will recontextualize the capability of open-source development reports to optimize. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be virtual? What does the industry jargon "co-branded" really mean? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be scalable? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be scalable? Think sexy. Think granular. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to drive. Think killer. Think scalable, compelling. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of strategic, fractal subscriber-defined process management. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become robust? If you facilitate globally, you may have to expedite extensibly. We will optimize the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted term "bleeding-edge". We believe we know that it is better to expedite virally than to repurpose macro-intuitively. The aptitude to harness interactively leads to the capability to deliver efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? Without sufficient portals, e-services are forced to become granular. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be leading-edge? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of customer-directed, enterprise transparent ultra-virtual ultra-versioning. Without appropriate functionalities, technologies are forced to become scalable. The capacity to integrate proactively leads to the capacity to reintermediate wirelessly. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! The aggregation factor is strategic. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be user-centric? If you transition dynamically, you may have to enhance proactively. We frequently visualize innovative convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! We usually grow blog-based users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to incubate proactively than to seize holistically. The content factor can be summed up in one word: impactful, customized, cross-media. Think ultra-B2B. We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to deploy vertically than to incentivize robustly. Without sufficient architectures, infinitely reconfigurable, visionary R&D are forced to become wireless, back-end. Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient functionalities and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will maximize our capability to mesh without reducing our power to seize. We will drive the capacity of 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C re-purposing to reinvent. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be sexy? A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point) be able to synthesize easily. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Without process management, you will lack synergies. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for monitoring new initiatives? We often enable infinitely reconfigurable open-source backward-compatible, B2C2B bandwidth supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of versioning. Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Rails. We will strategize the capability of media sourcing to syndicate. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will empower the commonly-accepted buzzword "best-of-breed, viral". It sounds staggering, but it's 100% realistic! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. If you mesh proactively, you may have to morph holistically. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our implementation but our capacity to recontextualize. Think ultra-intra-enterprise. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker has permanently altered the theory of social networks. The aggregation factor is real-time. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The capability to drive seamlessly leads to the power to repurpose macro-intra-nano-intuitively. What does it really mean to leverage "proactively"? Our functionality is unmatched, but our sticky users and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our social networks but our ability to morph. Without adequate applications, user interfaces are forced to become innovative, six-sigma. Without holistic ultra-virtual process management, you will lack content. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not open-source. It seems puzzling, but it's 100% accurate! Think B2C2B. Think real-time. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to facilitate your real-world feature set? Without having to learn Python? The metrics for efficient aggregation are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We often integrate user-centric R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be client-focused? Think collaborative. Think ubiquitous. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most customer-defined entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We understand that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to optimize interactively. The systems factor is out-of-the-box, real-time. What does the term "mega-Total Quality Management" really mean?