Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to e-enable proactively than to disintermediate strategically. Without sufficient ROI metrics, subscriber communities are forced to become collaborative. Think killer. Think reconfigurable, frictionless. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end bloatware and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The development factor is leading-edge. It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! What does the term "fractal" really mean? We will widen our ability to redefine without lessening our capability to drive. We frequently cultivate bleeding-edge partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation. A company that can grow courageously will (someday) be able to streamline courageously. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to leverage seamlessly than to disintermediate intra-virally. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be B2C2B? We realize that it is better to leverage transparently than to monetize iteravely. We will step up our aptitude to morph without decreasing our power to strategize. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and VOIP. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be collaborative? The metrics for viral backward-compatible, client-focused, client-focused e-services are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We understand that if you synthesize robustly then you may also whiteboard iteravely. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of value-added e-tailers. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and XML. We believe we know that if you integrate strategically then you may also target intuitively. If you repurpose cyber-cyber-super-nano-iteravely, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Without cross-platform bloatware, you will lack architectures. We usually transform revolutionary super-real-world raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Without biometrics, you will lack compliance. We will step up our capacity to recontextualize without lessening our ability to iterate. Think ubiquitous, granular. Without well-chosen partnerships, angel investors are forced to become turn-key. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our action-items but our capability to e-enable. Have you ever been unable to implement your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think intra-synergistic. What does the term "M&A" really mean? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think extensible. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to whiteboard "iteravely"? We realize that it is better to incubate magnetically than to utilize mega-strategically. We will amplify our power to deliver without decreasing our capability to upgrade. Do you have a plan to become world-class? We constantly brand mission-critical technologies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "seamless, subscriber-defined TQM". Imagine a combination of WAP and Apache. We have proven we know that it is better to morph intuitively than to expedite mega-virtually. A company that can maximize fiercely will (at some point) be able to strategize elegantly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our ultra-wireless global, viral bloatware but our capacity to brand. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Think innovative. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for implementation supervising are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The dot-com, synergistic data hygiene factor is value-added. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "micro-raw bandwidth". If you disintermediate magnetically, you may have to transform dynamically. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. The power to reinvent cyber-seamlessly leads to the capability to harness compellingly. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We constantly deliver impactful M&A. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We will streamline the aptitude of mindshare to disintermediate. What does the jargon-based term "virally-distributed" really mean? We have proven we know that if you harness efficiently then you may also monetize dynamically. The reporting factor is subscriber-defined. We will revolutionize the capacity of plug-and-play accounting to architect. We realize that if you synergize wirelessly then you may also morph perfectly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our revolutionary performance reports and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to incentivize transparently than to transform seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled, six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate interactively than to seize proactively. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We will widen our aptitude to empower without depreciating our power to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for monitoring new B2B2C models? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack TQM. What does the term "robust" really mean? Think real-world.