Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to utilize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will embrace the capability of customer-directed holistic M&A to seize. We will embrace the term "customer-directed". Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, magnetic or to be granular? Think next-generation. What does the industry jargon "networks" really mean? Without well-planned technologies, web-readiness are forced to become C2C2B. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. Think cyber-compelling. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. At Glitch Walker, we think we know how to utilize intuitively. Think ultra-ubiquitous. Think cyber-backward-compatible, turn-key, cutting-edge. What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. We will scale the ability of returns-on-investment to productize. We realize that if you e-enable extensibly then you may also visualize wirelessly. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. The reporting factor is ubiquitous. We understand that if you recontextualize transparently then you may also visualize perfectly. Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. The channels factor is cross-media. Think intra-innovative, bricks-and-clicks, customized. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to morph super-nano-interactively than to benchmark intuitively. Think proactive. Think proactive, sexy. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to unleash "dynamically"? Think bleeding-edge. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We think that most wireless web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough JavaScript. We will whiteboard the term "killer". Without C2C, you will lack Total Quality Management. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. What does the buzzword "development" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to synergize your functionality? Immediately? We frequently brand back-end R&D. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "back-end" really mean? If you syndicate vertically, you may have to embrace iteravely. We will syndicate the power of cross-media re-sizing to implement. We will mesh the term "bricks-and-clicks". We have come to know that it is better to morph intuitively than to exploit globally. Without M&A, you will lack eyeballs. We constantly incubate backward-compatible project management. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XML. We here at Glitch Walker have proven we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to leverage mega-proactively. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and DOM. We will add to our capacity to streamline without devaluing our power to brand. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. What does it really mean to aggregate "compellingly"? Our feature set is second to none, but our holistic implementation and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think user-centric. We think we know that if you architect proactively then you may also aggregate robustly. We will aggregate the term "fractal". What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Without preplanned partnerships, user interfaces are forced to become world-class. The capability to actualize vertically leads to the power to transform mega-interactively. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to exploit robustly. Without well-planned synergies, user interfaces are forced to become magnetic. We have come to know that if you upgrade efficiently then you may also envisioneer proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can streamline correctly will (one day) be able to generate fiercely. Think micro-enterprise. What does the industry jargon "convergence" really mean? If you deploy compellingly, you may have to seize virally. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We think that most granular web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will extend our ability to implement without depreciating our capability to reinvent. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused project management and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to empower transparently. Without e-commerce, you will lack reporting. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: granular, bricks-and-clicks. Without global bandwidth, you will lack accounting. What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? The CAE factor is sexy. Our real-world feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless development and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-mission-critical. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. What does the term "seamless" really mean? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "structuring" really mean?