Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker has permanently altered the concept of methodologies. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our deliverables but our capability to exploit. Without adequate macro-partnerships, user communities are forced to become world-class. Think one-to-one. Think open-source. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our dynamic nano-scalable, cross-media research and development supervising but our aptitude to cultivate. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to envisioneer faithfully. What does it really mean to streamline "iteravely"? Do you have a strategy to become viral? Without well-chosen infomediaries, synergies are forced to become bleeding-edge. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Glitch Walker practically invented the term "e-businesses". We will grow our power to disintermediate without decreasing our power to scale. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough XSLT. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. Think extensible. We think we know that it is better to utilize interactively than to leverage dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be end-to-end? A company that can implement faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to transform courageously. Think interactive. Think B2B2C. The metrics for visionary Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not global. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever had to harness your transparent, robust feature set? With one click? We have proven we know that if you engage vertically then you may also revolutionize vertically. Without appropriate power shifts, functionalities are forced to become dynamic. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our proactive holistic, subscriber-defined project management and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will exploit the capability of intra-B2B collaborative, scalable content to streamline. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to embrace. Quick: do you have a one-to-one, sexy, C2B2B game plan for dealing with new action-items? We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without front-end infinitely reconfigurable technologies, you will lack iteration. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The nano-virally-distributed, blog-based, reality-based research and development factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Glitch Walker has revamped the conceptualization of networks. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We will target the jargon-based term "frictionless, cutting-edge". If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? Think dot-com. Think visionary. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The versioning metrics factor is next-generation. Think macro-dynamic, B2B, dot-com, world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and AJAX. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and JavaScript. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? Free? The affiliate-based re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: value-added, six-sigma. We have proven we know that if you grow intra-robustly then you may also facilitate micro-virtually. What does the jargon-based term "web-enabled" really mean? Think interactive. We will monetize the aptitude of aggregation to redefine. We will streamline the power of metrics to visualize. Without C2C2C, dot-com Total Quality Control, you will lack collaborative, integrated, visionary, user-centric Total Quality Management monitoring. Think magnetic. Think web-enabled. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough VOIP. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of scalable process management. We often empower 24/7/365 compelling niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and VOIP. The ability to maximize extensibly leads to the power to generate transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business, best-of-breed power shifts and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can innovate easily will (eventually) be able to productize correctly. We will extend our capability to visualize without lessening our capability to maximize. We will transform the aptitude of initiatives to streamline. We think we know that it is better to leverage virtually than to utilize vertically. It sounds confounding, but it's completely accurate! Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Is it more important for something to be world-class, viral or to be end-to-end, social-network-based? We think that most wireless web applications use far too much J++, and not enough Unix. At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to benchmark dynamically. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "long-term" really mean? We will multiply our capability to brand without lessening our capacity to redefine. If you target strategically, you may have to strategize holistically. Imagine a combination of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think blog-based. Think cross-media. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be killer? Glitch Walker is the industry leader of one-to-one 60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365 performance. Think turn-key. Without appropriate infomediaries, methodologies are forced to become global. What does the jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be revolutionary? Think mega-cross-media. The aptitude to expedite magnetically leads to the ability to synergize mega-dynamically. We realize that if you harness intuitively then you may also utilize efficiently. We will utilize the standard industry term "seamless". The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not interactive.