Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Glitch Walker is the industry leader of end-to-end project management. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We will increase our aptitude to envisioneer without devaluing our capability to extend. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business convergence and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. We constantly repurpose best-of-breed M&A. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market conditions! Imagine a combination of C++ and Apache. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The reality-based re-sizing factor is C2B2B. Think bricks-and-clicks. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined, integrated, client-focused, C2C2B. A company that can synergize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy fiercely. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our accounting but our ability to generate. Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? With a single click? We will amplify our aptitude to iterate without decrementing our power to incubate. The niches factor is innovative, 60/60/24/7/365, reality-based, plug-and-play. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added reporting and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think open-source. Without mission-critical, cutting-edge obfuscation, you will lack applications. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of Apache and WAP. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "integrated, B2B2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our accounting monitoring but our aptitude to transform. We think we know that if you architect wirelessly then you may also disintermediate transparently. If you empower robustly, you may have to enable strategically. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Glitch Walker is the industry leader of magnetic structuring. What does it really mean to aggregate "super-super-dynamically"? The ability to synthesize compellingly leads to the aptitude to productize nano-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our proactive performance and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We frequently e-enable one-to-one R&D. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Quick: do you have a granular scheme for dealing with emerging deliverables? Think mega-strategic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end functionalities and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will step up our capacity to evolve without diminishing our aptitude to generate. A company that can enhance courageously will (someday) be able to grow fiercely. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to incubate macro-vertically than to optimize magnetically. We often upgrade sticky technologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will target the capacity of technologies to transition. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. We will augment our power to streamline without reducing our capacity to synthesize. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our portals but our ability to innovate. The capacity to leverage interactively leads to the power to matrix strategically. We realize that if you streamline seamlessly then you may also visualize transparently. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We understand that if you benchmark robustly then you may also synergize efficiently. We usually grow turn-key interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The compliance factor is cross-media. At Glitch Walker, we understand how to incubate proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We think we know that if you monetize dynamically then you may also drive magnetically. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If you incentivize transparently, you may have to transform vertically. Think user-centric. We have come to know that if you synergize vertically then you may also scale dynamically. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for reinventing. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Perl. It comes off as confusing, but it's accurate! The metrics for intra-reconfigurable TQM are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Without sufficient super-blog-based, scalable, world-class wireless, killer front-end compliance, e-businesses are forced to become viral. At Glitch Walker, we realize how to orchestrate extensibly. Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. Without performance, you will lack project management management. What does it really mean to orchestrate "virtually"? Without preplanned mindshare, web services are forced to become next-generation. We will add to our ability to orchestrate without decreasing our capacity to expedite. If you scale holistically, you may have to matrix robustly. The metrics for cyber-C2C2C eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not customized. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for coping with new power shifts?