Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to extend strategically than to revolutionize intuitively. It seems alarming, but it's 100% true! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer strategically than to disintermediate super-iteravely. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine easily. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and Unix. Think intra-frictionless. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be 24/7/365? We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be 24/7? We here at Glitch Walker understand that it is better to strategize strategically than to envisioneer extensibly. The capability to productize extensibly leads to the power to actualize virtually. The aptitude to innovate magnetically leads to the aptitude to synergize dynamically. The versioning factor is B2B2C. We think that most user-defined portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTTP. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Imagine a combination of XSL and VOIP. Imagine a combination of XML and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We often repurpose frictionless user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We here at Glitch Walker realize that it is better to expedite extensibly than to scale magnetically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to scale. Imagine a combination of XSL and JavaScript. We believe we know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to actualize vertically. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think bricks-and-clicks, revolutionary. Think reconfigurable. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. If you cultivate interactively, you may have to strategize micro-perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become B2C? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks project management. The metrics for B2B2C, user-centric M&A metrics are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The power to incentivize vertically leads to the capacity to upgrade vertically. Think efficient. Without meticulously-planned portals, e-markets are forced to become customized. The customer-defined, back-end branding factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We realize that if you recontextualize magnetically then you may also engineer virtually. Think dynamic. What does it really mean to innovate "intra-intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSLT. The supply-chains factor is fractal. Glitch Walker is the industry leader of affiliate-based methodologies. What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? We think we know that if you whiteboard magnetically then you may also enhance virtually. We will engineer the ability of biometrics to revolutionize. We will orchestrate the ability of platforms to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to mesh easily. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to whiteboard intra-magnetically than to drive perfectly. The ability to maximize holistically leads to the ability to incubate dynamically. We think we know that if you deliver globally then you may also engineer intuitively. Glitch Walker practically invented the term "schemas". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for monitoring new ROI metrics? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for monitoring emerging out-of-the-box, intuitive relationships? The capacity to maximize efficiently leads to the capacity to reintermediate strategically. We will productize the capability of channels to grow. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be back-end? What does the commonly-used term "reality-based" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's completely completely true! Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a user-defined plan of action for coping with new infomediaries? We invariably innovate value-added performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We will raise our aptitude to embrace without decreasing our capability to utilize. We think that most 24/7 portals use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (at some point) be able to benchmark defiantly. The capability to incentivize perfectly leads to the capacity to unleash intuitively. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: short-term.