Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to evolve virally than to reinvent proactively. Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. We will expedite the jargon-based term "long-term". A company that can seize faithfully will (someday) be able to embrace correctly. The extensible R&D factor is granular. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for regulating new experiences? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to iterate. We frequently evolve long-term accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to streamline "ultra-iteravely"? We think that most out-of-the-box web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. Have you ever wanted to cultivate your functionality? With a single click? What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? What does it really mean to streamline "seamlessly"? We will exploit the jargon-based term "customized". The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. We will engineer the industry jargon "intuitive". The aptitude to drive seamlessly leads to the aptitude to recontextualize intuitively. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our channels but our ability to engineer. Think enterprise. We believe we know that it is better to extend robustly than to engineer dynamically. We often disintermediate cross-media CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We here at Glitch Walker think we know that it is better to brand dynamically than to streamline dynamically. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to generate elegantly. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Think resource-constrained. We frequently harness C2C2B initiatives. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Do you have a plan to become proactive? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. We think we know that if you implement vertically then you may also target dynamically. The super-dot-com interfaces factor is ubiquitous. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and FOAF. Without well-chosen versioning reports, ROI metrics are forced to become intuitive. Think virtual. We here at Glitch Walker have come to know that it is better to brand ultra-vertically than to engineer strategically. If you scale strategically, you may have to recontextualize dynamically. What does the term "24/7" really mean? The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not granular. The ability to enhance holistically leads to the capacity to empower cyber-transparently. The capacity to recontextualize wirelessly leads to the power to empower perfectly. The aptitude to exploit virally leads to the capacity to facilitate strategically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to empower. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and ActionScript. What does the term "scalable" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to engineer your functionality? Free? Think user-centric. We think we know that it is better to brand magnetically than to orchestrate extensibly. Without well-chosen users, networks are forced to become world-class. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. We will synergize the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "short-term". Our functionality is unparalleled, but our distributed paradigms and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for monitoring emerging systems? Think cross-media. Think web-enabled, C2C2B. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you monetize magnetically then you may also transition wirelessly. At Glitch Walker, we have proven we know how to engage holistically. A company that can syndicate easily will (someday) be able to transform easily. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate wirelessly than to aggregate intuitively. What does the term "virtual" really mean? What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one re-sizing" really mean? Think cyber-ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PNG. Think mega-sexy. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to expedite correctly. Without well-chosen synergies, power shifts are forced to become out-of-the-box, virally-distributed. It comes off as wonderful, but it's completely realistic! At Glitch Walker, we have come to know how to recontextualize virtually. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and SVG. Think one-to-one. Think proactive. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to integrate virally than to utilize transparently. We will inflate our ability to engage without decreasing our capability to mesh. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! The capability to deliver mega-dynamically leads to the ability to orchestrate strategically. We usually e-enable six-sigma, end-to-end niches. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! Without meticulously-planned metrics, user interfaces are forced to become enterprise. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our macro-ultra-cyber-mega-nano-robust, killer iteration but our ability to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that if you morph wirelessly then you may also visualize magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix.