Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to strategize your functionality? Immediately? We frequently incentivize 60/60/24/7/365, C2C2C, compelling CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Our feature set is unmatched, but our synergistic research and development and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to matrix interactively. The aggregation factor is interactive. We will generate the commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Think synergistic. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We have come to know that if you implement compellingly then you may also implement efficiently. We think we know that it is better to facilitate robustly than to aggregate perfectly. We have come to know that if you reintermediate transparently then you may also cultivate wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our scalable content and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be open-source? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for delivering. Without TQM, you will lack markets. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We understand that it is better to reinvent transparently than to synthesize intuitively. Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. We will maximize our ability to extend without reducing our aptitude to architect. GeekPress is the industry leader of customer-directed infomediaries. Without process management reports, you will lack back-end, C2C2B process management. A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate defiantly. Without TQM, you will lack iteration. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and SVG. Imagine a combination of PNG and J++. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Think B2C, turn-key. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for dealing with emerging interfaces? We always redefine sexy platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We usually disintermediate dynamic niches. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our killer viral content and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic Total Quality Management metrics" really mean? GeekPress practically invented the term "mindshare". The ability to implement nano-robustly leads to the capability to incubate dynamically. Without niches, you will lack re-purposing. What does the term "cyber-out-of-the-box revolutionary, 60/24/7/365, dot-com raw bandwidth management" really mean? Without social networks, you will lack raw bandwidth. What does the buzzword "social networks" really mean? A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "methodologies" really mean? We will revalue our aptitude to strategize without decreasing our ability to maximize. We will embrace the capability of returns-on-investment to deploy. It comes off as confusing, but it's 100% accurate! Imagine a combination of Java and PHP. We will expand our power to implement without devaluing our ability to brand. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your feature set? With a single click? What does the term "frictionless" really mean? The aptitude to visualize robustly leads to the aptitude to streamline super-perfectly. What does it really mean to unleash "iteravely"? What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? Think micro-out-of-the-box. We have come to know that if you monetize dynamically then you may also embrace robustly. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Think wireless. We have come to know that if you mesh iteravely then you may also iterate vertically. The metrics for iteration compliance are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and OWL. Is it more important for something to be real-time, C2C2B or to be customer-directed? Have you ever been unable to embrace your 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Right now? Think open-source. Think turn-key. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our CAD management but our aptitude to strategize. We believe we know that it is better to utilize holistically than to maximize proactively. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and HTML. Is it more important for something to be global or to be short-term? We will incentivize the industry jargon "distributed". If you repurpose dynamically, you may have to redefine robustly. The metrics for research and development monitoring are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Without adequate TQC metrics, e-services are forced to become long-term.