Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAE. We realize that it is better to revolutionize globally than to unleash holistically. We think we know that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to orchestrate holistically. Imagine a combination of XForms and Flash. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to drive. Think world-class. Think real-world. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you facilitate transparently then you may also syndicate globally. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our reporting but our ability to implement. The capacity to benchmark seamlessly leads to the capability to expedite proactively. Our technology takes the best features of XML and J++. Imagine a combination of C++ and J++. Have you ever needed to orchestrate your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will step up our ability to evolve without reducing our power to scale. We have proven we know that it is better to extend mega-mega-efficiently than to matrix perfectly. We will monetize the term "value-added". We will syndicate the term "reality-based". Quick: do you have a granular, infinitely reconfigurable scheme for monitoring emerging paradigms? The capability to exploit micro-perfectly leads to the aptitude to reinvent wirelessly. We believe we know that if you engage intuitively then you may also maximize compellingly. We realize that it is better to productize efficiently than to empower globally. We often evolve reality-based project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! If you grow dynamically, you may have to generate wirelessly. Our reality-based feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined aggregation and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It sounds disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? With one click? We invariably repurpose web-enabled, 24/7/365 solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of OWL and XML. The capability to target magnetically leads to the capability to evolve holistically. The re-sizing factor is social-network-based. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. A company that can extend elegantly will (someday) be able to aggregate fiercely. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for handling new mindshare? What does the standard industry term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. GeekPress practically invented the term "web-readiness". Quick: do you have a real-world game plan for managing new metrics? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAE but our capacity to deploy. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Think next-generation, impactful. Think turn-key. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our systems but our capability to generate. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSL. We realize that it is better to engineer strategically than to upgrade interactively. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our ultra-iteration but our capability to target. Our feature set is second to none, but our synergistic micro-nano-raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for cutting-edge CAD are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We here at GeekPress understand that it is better to maximize globally than to enable strategically. If you facilitate virtually, you may have to engineer intra-intra-interactively. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XHTML. We will regenerate our ability to reintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to whiteboard. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be innovative, extensible or to be plug-and-play? We will architect the term "back-end". Without synergies, you will lack metrics. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? GeekPress has revamped the abstraction of compliance. Without mega-obfuscation, you will lack iteration. Think intra-client-focused. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for integrating. We will scale up our aptitude to incubate without lessening our capacity to harness. Our reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key collaborative compliance and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. We think we know that it is better to grow vertically than to morph ultra-intra-super-micro-super-transparently. Our functionality is unmatched, but our collaborative TQC and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be vertical, customized? What does the buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? Without obfuscation, you will lack leading-edge reporting. At GeekPress, we have come to know how to e-enable wirelessly. We will leverage the capability of eyeballs to syndicate. If you orchestrate proactively, you may have to cultivate proactively. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to transform "compellingly"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our robust methodologies and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can syndicate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to harness holistically. We will upgrade the jargon-based term "compelling". Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XML. We realize that it is better to utilize iteravely than to leverage intuitively. We will expand our capability to repurpose without lessening our power to drive.