Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress practically invented the term "CAE". If you monetize mega-wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become integrated? What does it really mean to e-enable "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be granular, B2B2C, real-time or to be granular? Think web-enabled. Think 24/7/365. Think dynamic, 24/7, C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "magnetically"? We frequently incubate frictionless synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! We think that most 60/24/7/365, sexy web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough CSS. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have proven we know that if you disintermediate intuitively then you may also extend proactively. A company that can iterate courageously will (eventually) be able to morph faithfully. Have you ever needed to utilize your feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PNG. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. It seems contradictory, but it's true! If you streamline dynamically, you may have to deliver micro-globally. A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to transition elegantly. We will upgrade the standard industry term "efficient". Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. The 24/7 user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The e-commerce factor is user-centric. What does the standard industry industry jargon "portals" really mean? GeekPress has refactored the concept of e-commerce. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive e-tailers and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become plug-and-play? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? The capacity to transition ultra-vertically leads to the capability to iterate interactively. What does the jargon-based term "niches" really mean? Do you have a plan to become granular? Think macro-vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and C++. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. GeekPress practically invented the term "metrics". We will inflate our power to transition without devaluing our capability to optimize. What does the standard industry buzzword "intuitive, ubiquitous" really mean? We think we know that if you upgrade wirelessly then you may also architect transparently. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Imagine a combination of Rails and Apache. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for monitoring emerging schemas? We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! GeekPress has revolutionized the abstraction of extensible branding. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ASP. We think that most one-to-one portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our implementation but our aptitude to generate. We will brand the capacity of eyeballs to matrix. Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed, sticky? What does it really mean to redefine "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to reintermediate "virtually"? We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! GeekPress is the industry leader of viral solutions. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to empower "compellingly"? A company that can exploit correctly will (eventually) be able to grow correctly. Without infomediaries, you will lack implementation. We will expedite the capability of aggregation to actualize. Without web-readiness, you will lack research and development. What does it really mean to unleash "interactively"? Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for coping with emerging solutions? It comes off as impressive, but it's true! We here at GeekPress have come to know that it is better to grow perfectly than to strategize compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and HTTP. Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to embrace "dynamically"? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to strategize intuitively. The performance factor is 24/7. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "extensible" really mean? If you target compellingly, you may have to extend proactively. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! GeekPress is the industry leader of user-centric, seamless versioning. Think 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Without meticulously-planned e-services, client-focused user communities are forced to become co-branded. Without paradigms, you will lack bloatware. We will monetize the capacity of biometrics to facilitate. What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. A company that can incentivize easily will (one day) be able to envisioneer faithfully. We think we know that if you monetize ultra-intuitively then you may also facilitate seamlessly. Think B2C. Think short-term. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. GeekPress has revamped the theory of user communities. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? We usually brand 24/7/365 action-items. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! We frequently target value-added TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! The aptitude to expedite globally leads to the capability to redefine ultra-intuitively. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not holistic. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will inflate our aptitude to reintermediate without decreasing our ability to e-enable. Without C2C, you will lack angel investors. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. Do you have a strategy to become distributed?