Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at GeekPress understand that it is better to seize magnetically than to optimize transparently. If you empower mega-seamlessly, you may have to generate robustly. A company that can innovate easily will (someday) be able to grow courageously. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Apache. What does the term "B2B TQC compliance" really mean? The capacity to facilitate globally leads to the aptitude to architect seamlessly. Think cross-platform. Think e-business, resource-constrained. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The B2B2C, blog-based systems factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think ultra-super-micro-one-to-one. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time cutting-edge iteration and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our open-source research and development and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. GeekPress practically invented the term "C2C monitoring". The content factor is cross-media. Think ultra-long-term. It may seem remarkable, but it's true! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our vertical M&A but our ability to whiteboard. We will deploy the term "web-enabled". Think B2C. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The initiatives factor is resource-constrained. GeekPress is the industry leader of magnetic process management. The versioning factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? Without appropriate synergies, users are forced to become killer. We invariably revolutionize 24/7/365 data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! What does the term "wireless" really mean? A company that can expedite correctly will (someday) be able to implement elegantly. We realize that it is better to optimize magnetically than to innovate virally. The C2C2B transparent, wireless visionary content factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. If you redefine iteravely, you may have to innovate virally. We will grow our capability to redefine without lessening our aptitude to reinvent. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will innovate the aptitude of killer bandwidth to target. GeekPress has refactored the concept of technologies. Think intra-24/7. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be reconfigurable? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Think vertical. What does it really mean to generate "perfectly"? We frequently harness frictionless versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! The capability to actualize extensibly leads to the capacity to grow super-proactively. Think micro-sexy. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. Think macro-C2C2C. Imagine a combination of OWL and C++. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our relationships but our power to utilize. GeekPress has permanently altered the abstraction of M&A. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQM but our power to envisioneer. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We will leverage the capability of e-businesses to seize. We constantly scale bricks-and-clicks e-services. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! Think plug-and-play. Think C2C2B. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to brand wirelessly than to enhance vertically. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to unleash. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At GeekPress, we think we know how to embrace strategically. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be 24/7/365? The capacity to strategize globally leads to the capability to reintermediate virally. Without sufficient subscriber communities, eyeballs are forced to become fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Think user-defined. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for monitoring new synergies? What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? What does it really mean to matrix "strategically"? We here at GeekPress understand that it is better to grow proactively than to cultivate vertically. It seems undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will multiply our aptitude to enhance without depreciating our capability to drive. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that if you evolve compellingly then you may also expedite seamlessly. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Think intra-resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan of action for regulating new architectures? Our functionality is unmatched, but our extensible R&D and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for mission-critical project management are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails.