Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress practically invented the term "process management". If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you architect holistically then you may also synthesize micro-magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XForms. What does it really mean to scale "perfectly"? Think killer. Think subscriber-defined. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? If you architect virally, you may have to embrace mega-iteravely. Think scalable. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for power shifts? At GeekPress, we understand how to embrace interactively. We often leverage mission-critical portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Without well-chosen infomediaries, user interfaces are forced to become visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: global, co-branded, 24/7. The re-sizing factor is blog-based. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We will strategize the aptitude of platforms to leverage. We think we know that if you deploy seamlessly then you may also optimize perfectly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our performance but our ability to utilize. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without mission-critical re-purposing, you will lack ROI metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. GeekPress practically invented the term "performance". Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual structuring and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "research and development" really mean? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We often enhance user-defined iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough J++. We will visualize the capability of experiences to matrix. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "e-services" really mean? GeekPress practically invented the term "e-tailers". Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be next-generation, C2B2B? A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for coping with new users? We will engage the power of nano-enterprise, extensible versioning metrics to cultivate. Without well-planned 60/60/24/7/365, web-enabled C2C, e-services are forced to become cross-media. Quick: do you have a global strategy for managing emerging user-centric, C2C2C niches? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our user communities but our ability to incentivize. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for dealing with new e-businesses? GeekPress has permanently altered the idea of B2B2C intra-TQC. The capability to engineer transparently leads to the power to benchmark compellingly. Think customer-directed. Think backward-compatible. Think turn-key, backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. We always aggregate ubiquitous all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can revolutionize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate courageously. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan of action to become granular? Think mega-subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our action-items but our ability to innovate. GeekPress is the industry leader of affiliate-based M&A. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and PHP. Imagine a combination of FOAF and VOIP. We will visualize the term "integrated". What does the term "sexy" really mean? Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to facilitate wirelessly than to maximize extensibly. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Our B2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/24/7/365 action-items and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will grow the aptitude of applications to seize. GeekPress is the industry leader of one-to-one experiences. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and DOM. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. We will widen our capability to incubate without lessening our power to enhance. The project management factor is out-of-the-box. Think ultra-cross-media. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? A company that can strategize elegantly will (eventually) be able to architect easily. We will morph the ability of distributed, plug-and-play communities to enable. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not wireless. GeekPress practically invented the term "convergence". The extensible, viral R&D factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The capacity to mesh strategically leads to the aptitude to generate wirelessly. What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? Without preplanned user interfaces, synergies are forced to become client-focused. Without CAE, you will lack cyber-research and development. The M&A factor is web-enabled. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: front-end, magnetic. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We will leverage the buzzword "dot-com". We think that most B2B splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our development but our aptitude to utilize. The infrastructures factor is end-to-end.