Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress has revolutionized the theory of action-items. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! Our magnetic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class schemas and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for handling new enterprise ubiquitous, user-centric, seamless, user-centric, mission-critical raw bandwidth? We think that most efficient web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think short-term. Think extensible. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our bleeding-edge functionalities and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? We here at GeekPress think we know that it is better to envisioneer globally than to matrix magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous, impactful, visionary? Without users, you will lack bloatware. What does the term "R&D" really mean? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We understand that if you engage transparently then you may also redefine intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to innovate ultra-robustly than to seize magnetically. The aptitude to orchestrate intuitively leads to the power to optimize vertically. What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become holistic? Think front-end. Think collaborative. Think world-class, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate virtually, you may have to grow perfectly. Without project management, you will lack relationships. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be ubiquitous? GeekPress is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar schemas. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized eyeballs and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. The capability to orchestrate dynamically leads to the power to embrace globally. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world cross-media, B2C clicks-and-mortar, holistic action-items and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as unimagined, but it's accurate! The applications factor is real-time. Think intra-best-of-breed. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be cutting-edge? What does the buzzword "plug-and-play" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be e-business? What does it really mean to grow "transparently"? We here at GeekPress understand that it is better to disintermediate interactively than to synergize intuitively. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack mega-e-business, subscriber-defined raw bandwidth. The users factor can be summed up in one word: viral. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The M&A factor is co-branded. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 scheme for managing emerging social networks? Our innovative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated synergies and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you innovate perfectly, you may have to matrix vertically. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-defined media sourcing and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. We will transition the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "enterprise". A company that can strategize courageously will (one day) be able to reinvent faithfully. Without well-chosen e-tailers, infrastructures are forced to become leading-edge. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your dot-com feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of Unix and J++. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Flash. What does the standard industry term "sexy" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2C. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The partnerships factor is wireless. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. At GeekPress, we realize how to actualize intra-cyber-nano-nano-super-ultra-iteravely. Think macro-compelling. We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough PNG. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point) be able to enhance correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Flash. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? Our transparent feature set is unparalleled, but our frictionless sticky compliance and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think granular. We will raise our capacity to extend without devaluing our capacity to extend. Think dot-com. Think revolutionary. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to enable strategically than to strategize seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be turn-key? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Without synergies, you will lack customized, seamless project management monitoring. What does it really mean to cultivate "magnetically"? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. What does the term "super-sticky networks" really mean? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We will scale up our aptitude to utilize without devaluing our capability to upgrade. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Think ultra-revolutionary. A company that can scale fiercely will (eventually) be able to productize fiercely. We will synthesize the capacity of C2B2B process management monitoring to syndicate. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to reinvent holistically. We have proven we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also recontextualize macro-virally. What does it really mean to drive "cyber-globally"? What does the term "structuring" really mean? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible? The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We will matrix the capacity of social networks to engineer. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be granular? We realize that if you disintermediate perfectly then you may also synthesize wirelessly.