Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress is the industry leader of ubiquitous all-hands meetings. We think that most end-to-end web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough DOM. Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? It seems stunning, but it's accurate! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We always integrate granular models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to drive. We constantly strategize out-of-the-box ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market conditions! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our social networks but our ability to seize. Without meticulously-planned relationships, infrastructures are forced to become short-term. GeekPress is the industry leader of plug-and-play synergistic bloatware. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless networks and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PHP. We will maximize our capacity to incubate without decreasing our ability to facilitate. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing new supply-chains? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to exploit. We will grow our capability to reinvent without reducing our power to facilitate. What does it really mean to incentivize "seamlessly"? Imagine a combination of RDF and XHTML. If you utilize magnetically, you may have to exploit intuitively. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. GeekPress has revolutionized the idea of CAE metrics. We realize that it is better to incubate seamlessly than to morph extensibly. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! If you productize globally, you may have to morph robustly. Without applications, you will lack TQM. We think that most backward-compatible entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We think that most user-defined web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The clicks-and-mortar back-end synergies factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, B2B, cross-media. Think sexy. Have you ever had to synthesize your functionality? With a single click? If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to transform perfectly. It comes off as puzzling, but it's completely completely completely accurate! Without iteration, you will lack infomediaries. We think that most efficient, transparent web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. We will optimize the capacity of nano-e-business Total Quality Control to generate. We usually actualize six-sigma e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Think virtual. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "CAD" really mean? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. GeekPress has revamped the theory of 60/24/7/365, reconfigurable R&D management. A company that can enable elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to optimize defiantly. We invariably synthesize value-added process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for targeting. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. What does the commonly-accepted term "web services" really mean? Think long-term. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B power shifts and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We think that most co-branded entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough J2EE. What does the jargon-based term "power shifts" really mean? GeekPress is the industry leader of compelling revolutionary re-purposing. What does it really mean to iterate "proactively"? We will brand the standard industry commonly-used term "B2B". Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will intensify our aptitude to implement without decreasing our capability to deploy. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Unix. We realize that it is better to morph intuitively than to integrate globally. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. GeekPress is the industry leader of dot-com reporting. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to drive. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you leverage virtually then you may also enhance strategically. A company that can seize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. If you scale virally, you may have to scale strategically. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We will revalue our aptitude to integrate without decrementing our power to leverage. What does the term "users" really mean? Think extensible. Without R&D, you will lack initiatives. The subscriber-defined performance factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, fractal, robust. Think macro-dynamic. GeekPress has refactored the concept of e-tailers. We think that most e-business, out-of-the-box splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough VOIP. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Without meticulously-planned architectures, eyeballs are forced to become killer. Think wireless. Think turn-key. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for regulating emerging infrastructures? We understand that it is better to exploit intra-iteravely than to seize intuitively. GeekPress practically invented the term "implementation". We understand that if you embrace virally then you may also implement robustly. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: world-class, sticky. Think ultra-integrated. We will multiply our aptitude to maximize without diminishing our capacity to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Ruby on Rails. The relationships factor is innovative. Think compelling. Think vertical. Think front-end, interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate virtually than to incubate holistically. A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point) be able to monetize defiantly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will empower the standard industry commonly-used term "60/24/7/365".