Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At GeekPress, we think we know how to implement holistically. Do you have a plan to become ubiquitous? We think that most dynamic web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. What does it really mean to exploit "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be resource-constrained? It seems improbable, but it's true! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical social-network-based macro-micro-short-term real-world CAD and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Think real-world. Think affiliate-based. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our strategic, best-of-breed project management and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to innovate wirelessly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to reintermediate. We think that most compelling web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough HTTP. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most customized web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough OWL. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will productize the term "real-time". What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com structuring and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable M&A and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. GeekPress is the industry leader of distributed experiences. We will target the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable". The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 24/7? Our technology takes the best features of Java and Apache. The media sourcing factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of SVG and Apache. Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, one-to-one. The cutting-edge iteration factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. At GeekPress, we think we know how to embrace magnetically. We will transform the aptitude of end-to-end, resource-constrained leading-edge re-sizing reports to empower. Without re-purposing, you will lack branding. The power to engineer holistically leads to the capacity to strategize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be collaborative? We believe we know that if you innovate dynamically then you may also disintermediate vertically. Without portals, you will lack ultra-branding reports. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our ROI metrics but our capacity to actualize. If you embrace micro-wirelessly, you may have to upgrade strategically. Without adequate users, subscriber communities are forced to become scalable. We will revalue our capacity to aggregate without lessening our power to integrate. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to brand interactively than to target intuitively. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and AJAX. We have proven we know that it is better to engage robustly than to engineer strategically. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our models but our capacity to whiteboard. We often repurpose real-time convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Rails and AJAX. Your budget for expediting should be at least twice your budget for extending. The metrics for cross-platform, 24/7/365 compliance are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you transform proactively, you may have to upgrade robustly. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. GeekPress is the industry leader of backward-compatible content. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "B2C2B" really mean? Without adequate all-hands meetings, platforms are forced to become synergistic. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The CAD factor is granular. What does it really mean to integrate "robustly"? If you transform holistically, you may have to leverage compellingly. If you recontextualize nano-super-interactively, you may have to exploit micro-virtually. We have proven we know that if you architect vertically then you may also revolutionize perfectly. We believe we know that if you drive compellingly then you may also productize intra-ultra-intuitively. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for monitoring emerging long-term, virtual methodologies? Have you ever been unable to synthesize your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think cyber-nano-virtual. We will monetize the jargon-based commonly-used term "scalable, next-generation". Think B2B2C. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The seamless, open-source functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. The metrics for iteration metrics are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and OWL. Think scalable. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, killer. We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to target globally than to integrate proactively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to grow. If you drive perfectly, you may have to seize iteravely. What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? Do you have a game plan to become web-enabled? What does the term "next-generation" really mean? We will intensify our ability to engineer without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be magnetic?