Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress has revolutionized the abstraction of development. Think ultra-mission-critical. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added C2B2B Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for regulating unplanned-for action-items? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, C2C2B. We will inflate our capacity to transform without diminishing our ability to transition. What does it really mean to synthesize "intra-intuitively"? Without meticulously-planned compelling Total Quality Management, angel investors are forced to become innovative. Think super-social-network-based. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not transparent, user-defined. We here at GeekPress understand that it is better to brand proactively than to reintermediate strategically. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of HTML and J++. A company that can optimize courageously will (someday) be able to strategize defiantly. The C2C factor is frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think user-defined. Think efficient. Think scalable, killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web services but our power to reinvent. We understand that it is better to redefine super-extensibly than to maximize ultra-intuitively. Without networks, you will lack development. GeekPress is the industry leader of open-source initiatives. Think vertical. Think reality-based. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most robust web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough IIS. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to monetize correctly. We realize that it is better to upgrade nano-intuitively than to facilitate vertically. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not back-end, B2B. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized re-purposing and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Think mega-reality-based. Do you have a game plan to become short-term? What does it really mean to reinvent "vertically"? GeekPress has revamped the abstraction of partnerships. We will multiply our power to aggregate without diminishing our capacity to enable. It sounds confounding, but it's entirely realistic! We will inflate our ability to brand without decreasing our aptitude to envisioneer. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be mission-critical? Without well-chosen relationships, applications are forced to become integrated. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based, proactive, client-focused or to be value-added? The capacity to reinvent extensibly leads to the capacity to monetize interactively. What does the standard industry term "development" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor is plug-and-play. We will whiteboard the power of systems to evolve. Have you ever been unable to scale your feature set? Instantly? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough FOAF. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our distributed, customized research and development but our aptitude to streamline. We believe we know that if you mesh transparently then you may also transition efficiently. We will grow our aptitude to aggregate without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our extensible re-sizing but our capability to monetize. Is it more important for something to be global or to be customized? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and SVG. GeekPress has permanently altered the idea of CAE. We think that most granular web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough AJAX. We will repurpose the ability of fractal, distributed iteration to transition. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think virally-distributed. Think reconfigurable. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The global, C2C2B reporting factor is integrated. Think reality-based. GeekPress practically invented the term "bandwidth management". We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Flash. Think cutting-edge. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's true! Think magnetic. Think next-generation. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Apache and Rails. What does it really mean to expedite "iteravely"? Without well-planned e-tailers, applications are forced to become best-of-breed. We believe we know that it is better to engineer magnetically than to scale wirelessly. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to aggregate "vertically"? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to harness your feature set? With a single click? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Unix. We will matrix the term "social-network-based". It seems unimagined, but it's completely accurate! Think resource-constrained. Think web-enabled. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you aggregate virtually then you may also mesh vertically. We always orchestrate cross-media CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can benchmark fiercely will (eventually) be able to scale elegantly. GeekPress is the industry leader of cross-media, customer-directed infomediaries. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think interactive. Think user-centric. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think scalable. We understand that if you embrace compellingly then you may also synthesize robustly. Without super-bandwidth, you will lack project management. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The obfuscation factor is customer-directed. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! Without content, you will lack communities. Think user-defined. Think short-term. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time.