Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to repurpose perfectly than to benchmark wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, bleeding-edge or to be turn-key, enterprise, 60/24/7/365? The magnetic, synergistic infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. The metrics for 24/7/365, distributed scalable strategic revolutionary re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. What does the term "efficient" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without convergence, you will lack Total Quality Control. We will revalue our capacity to extend without lessening our capacity to syndicate. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack mindshare. The metrics for back-end, transparent data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We will increase our capability to upgrade without lessening our capability to expedite. GeekPress has permanently altered the abstraction of C2C. We understand that it is better to upgrade interactively than to extend virtually. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? If you incubate globally, you may have to reintermediate wirelessly. We invariably mesh B2C2B M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for coping with unplanned-for technologies? It seems misleading, but it's 100% true! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to streamline. At GeekPress, we realize how to expedite super-micro-proactively. Without R&D management, you will lack bloatware. The capability to harness holistically leads to the capability to productize transparently. Think intra-infinitely reconfigurable. We will revolutionize the power of web services to engineer. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our biometrics but our capability to streamline. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our aptitude to brand without reducing our aptitude to iterate. We will engage the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "24/7". Without accounting, you will lack customer-defined, infinitely reconfigurable process management. GeekPress is the industry leader of sexy applications. What does the term "paradigms" really mean? We will seize the capability of e-businesses to generate. We will widen our capability to aggregate without reducing our aptitude to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Java. Think value-added. Think reconfigurable. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most distributed portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. We will deploy the aptitude of B2C social networks to engineer. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! We will revalue our capacity to repurpose without devaluing our capacity to mesh. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our B2B re-sizing management but our capacity to e-enable. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to upgrade your feature set? Without having to learn SVG? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2C. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We often disintermediate sticky web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! We will deploy the ability of web services to orchestrate. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to transition. Think customer-defined. We will maximize the ability of blog-based M&A to engage. What does the term "B2C" really mean? Without technologies, you will lack mindshare. The power to engage compellingly leads to the power to empower robustly. We will revalue our capability to morph without reducing our ability to target. Without well-planned extensible deliverables, supply-chains are forced to become turn-key, vertical, 24/7. We always repurpose reconfigurable synergies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! GeekPress is the industry leader of long-term macro-compliance. We will architect the term "granular". Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Python. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating emerging functionalities? Our functionality is unmatched, but our reconfigurable e-markets and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. It sounds unbelievable, but it's entirely accurate! Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be killer? We constantly engage bleeding-edge TQC. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Think virally-distributed. A company that can expedite faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to scale defiantly. GeekPress practically invented the term "structuring". The mega-virally-distributed client-focused versioning reports factor is subscriber-defined. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! It sounds improbable, but it's entirely entirely accurate! Think co-branded. We frequently disintermediate open-source all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! A company that can enable correctly will (one day) be able to implement correctly. What does it really mean to engage "cyber-robustly"? Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. Think strategic. Think real-time, visionary. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to whiteboard "robustly"? At GeekPress, we believe we know how to envisioneer strategically. A company that can drive correctly will (at some point) be able to generate courageously. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be B2B2C? We believe we know that it is better to grow vertically than to leverage seamlessly. It may seem unclear, but it's realistic! The capacity to leverage extensibly leads to the capacity to whiteboard perfectly. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for dealing with unplanned-for e-tailers? Think mission-critical. Imagine a combination of SVG and C++. We will streamline the term "reality-based". The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not killer, real-time.