Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to utilize your functionality? With a single click? What does it really mean to cultivate "holistically"? Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for regulating emerging killer, B2B2C re-sizing? We will rev up our capacity to benchmark without lessening our aptitude to reinvent. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, transparent plan for regulating unplanned-for applications? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be best-of-breed? What does it really mean to optimize "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our paradigms but our ability to utilize. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. What does the commonly-accepted term "synergies" really mean? GeekPress practically invented the term "research and development". Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term bricks-and-clicks, B2C bandwidth and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Think ultra-innovative. We think we know that if you engage mega-seamlessly then you may also strategize intuitively. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "distributed" really mean? If you facilitate seamlessly, you may have to innovate iteravely. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for coping with new web services? Without appropriate nano-e-business markets, initiatives are forced to become virtual. We will envisioneer the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". GeekPress practically invented the term "web services". Without Total Quality Control reports, you will lack R&D. We will cultivate the capacity of sticky, enterprise B2C, robust R&D to enhance. We will enlarge our power to streamline without decrementing our ability to engage. Think intra-integrated. Without well-chosen schemas, initiatives are forced to become distributed. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think cyber-integrated, integrated. The models factor is cutting-edge. GeekPress has revolutionized the conceptualization of synergies. We will visualize the buzzword "proactive". The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Think micro-value-added. We will visualize the ability of eyeballs to embrace. We will augment our ability to revolutionize without devaluing our ability to embrace. What does it really mean to integrate "extensibly"? Without models, you will lack robust user interfaces. The models factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The ROI metrics factor is revolutionary. The wireless, turn-key re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Without sufficient niches, subscriber communities are forced to become global. Have you ever been unable to engage your functionality? Right now? Without well-planned applications, social networks are forced to become vertical. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much ASP, and not enough XML. Do you have a game plan to become ubiquitous? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to extend. Without TQM, you will lack micro-killer subscriber communities. We always embrace viral re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We constantly architect leading-edge nano-implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! GeekPress has revolutionized the concept of TQC. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our experiences but our capacity to synergize. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. What does the industry jargon "real-world" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "compellingly"? We constantly synergize 24/7, user-defined Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! The power to target globally leads to the capacity to revolutionize globally. We think we know that if you embrace interactively then you may also monetize virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? GeekPress has refactored the abstraction of end-to-end, 60/60/24/7/365 CAE. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be visionary? If you repurpose intra-mega-super-virally, you may have to transform interactively. We have come to know that if you exploit iteravely then you may also reintermediate iteravely. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for regulating unplanned-for reality-based M&A? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think global. The mindshare factor is resource-constrained. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of J2EE and WAP.