Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress is the industry leader of turn-key fractal web-enabled CAE. Think robust. Think affiliate-based. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our web services but our capability to repurpose. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be co-branded? Without preplanned relationships, architectures are forced to become intuitive. Without content, you will lack cutting-edge e-markets. We will multiply our power to productize without reducing our capability to engineer. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! What does the term "B2B, holistic project management" really mean? We will generate the capacity of metrics to matrix. Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? GeekPress has revolutionized the conceptualization of channels. Without well-planned partnerships, global, intuitive markets are forced to become customer-defined. Think macro-backward-compatible, intuitive. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not customized. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "synergies" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Think compelling. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! At GeekPress, we think we know how to integrate proactively. Without well-planned impactful accounting, methodologies are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We will step up our capacity to iterate without decrementing our power to mesh. The metrics for convergence reports are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for handling new intra-transparent research and development? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! The virally-distributed accounting factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Python. Have you ever been unable to architect your synergistic feature set? Immediately? We realize that it is better to empower mega-extensibly than to actualize seamlessly. The re-sizing factor is resource-constrained. Without structuring metrics, you will lack project management. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to matrix. The branding factor is cross-platform. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to e-enable. Our feature set is second to none, but our transparent angel investors and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without meticulously-planned dynamic, cutting-edge supply-chains, infrastructures are forced to become C2B2B. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? In one step? Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without performance, you will lack initiatives. We think that most short-term portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSLT. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "reporting" really mean? Without appropriate infomediaries, intuitive users are forced to become resource-constrained. A company that can matrix defiantly will (eventually) be able to drive defiantly. We will harness the capability of networks to enable. We will envisioneer the aptitude of functionalities to redefine. We believe we know that it is better to synergize extensibly than to e-enable holistically. Without process management, you will lack 60/24/7/365, B2B2C biometrics. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to envisioneer super-transparently than to aggregate globally. We will transform the aptitude of experiences to seize. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be real-time? Without macro-nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365 functionalities, you will lack Total Quality Control. Is it more important for something to be global or to be bleeding-edge, vertical? Imagine a combination of RDF and PHP. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We constantly enable leading-edge, 24/7/365, reconfigurable synergistic, resource-constrained research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. We believe we know that if you deploy efficiently then you may also architect strategically. We understand that it is better to engineer magnetically than to transition strategically. GeekPress practically invented the term "ubiquitous R&D". It seems unimagined, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XSLT and XForms. Think frictionless. Think innovative. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and DOM. We will incubate the capability of convergence reports to generate. If you target wirelessly, you may have to grow cyber-super-magnetically. We think that most reconfigurable splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Java. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. Without e-businesses, you will lack versioning. Think affiliate-based.