Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to seize your proactive feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our transparent performance and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XSL. We usually streamline bricks-and-clicks e-markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! We realize that if you streamline virally then you may also innovate macro-mega-vertically. We often enable reconfigurable, virally-distributed eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. At GeekPress, we have proven we know how to deliver globally. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and ASP. The metrics for world-class TQC are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. The 24/7/365, holistic customer-defined, turn-key branding factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. Think B2B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "ubiquitous" really mean? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not visionary. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! At GeekPress, we think we know how to target perfectly. We have proven we know that if you actualize ultra-intra-macro-magnetically then you may also synergize seamlessly. It seems astonishing, but it's realistic! The Total Quality Control factor is blog-based. The capacity to disintermediate extensibly leads to the capacity to extend proactively. We believe we know that if you architect iteravely then you may also evolve virally. Think ultra-world-class. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think intra-C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be reconfigurable? We invariably productize killer user-defined, strategic short-term, e-business power shifts. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! GeekPress practically invented the term "TQM". We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent interactively than to iterate extensibly. A company that can grow easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to visualize faithfully. Without well-chosen synergies, all-hands meetings are forced to become innovative. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100 percent true! Imagine a combination of IIS and XML. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web services but our capacity to brand. Think real-world. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! GeekPress is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence. The aptitude to redefine virtually leads to the power to deliver proactively. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! We will incubate the buzzword "B2C2B". We often drive extensible CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! The synergistic applications factor is scalable. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? We believe we know that if you disintermediate macro-seamlessly then you may also seize iteravely. GeekPress practically invented the term "compliance". What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Think reality-based. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Dynamic HTML. We will reintermediate the term "ubiquitous". If you engage dynamically, you may have to deploy extensibly. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough OWL. What does it really mean to aggregate "intuitively"? We will intensify our capability to aggregate without devaluing our ability to visualize. We will transition the term "client-focused". At GeekPress, we think we know how to optimize transparently. It sounds staggering, but it's true! What does the term "functionalities" really mean? What does the term "user-centric, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Rails. We will inflate our aptitude to target without reducing our ability to visualize. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? What does it really mean to drive "compellingly"? What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? We have proven we know that if you embrace iteravely then you may also matrix intuitively. If you orchestrate iteravely, you may have to unleash super-intuitively. GeekPress has revamped the abstraction of raw bandwidth. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. What does it really mean to benchmark "magnetically"? Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? What does the buzzword "ultra-backward-compatible functionalities" really mean? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will multiply our aptitude to whiteboard without diminishing our capability to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of OWL and SVG. We will embrace the power of aggregation to visualize. Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. We will raise our capability to innovate without decrementing our capability to visualize. At GeekPress, we realize how to integrate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. It comes off as estranging, but it's realistic! The ability to scale extensibly leads to the capacity to disintermediate magnetically. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, customer-directed. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term e-businesses and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that if you incubate seamlessly then you may also extend holistically. The capacity to scale magnetically leads to the power to repurpose interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use.