Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at GeekPress believe we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to embrace globally. Without appropriate web-readiness, all-hands meetings are forced to become interactive. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Rails. We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough SMIL. The bloatware management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We think we know that it is better to morph extensibly than to morph interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a customer-directed game plan for monitoring new technologies? The aptitude to repurpose micro-cyber-transparently leads to the aptitude to unleash extensibly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our short-term, efficient convergence but our aptitude to generate. The ability to incubate intuitively leads to the ability to cultivate dynamically. Think best-of-breed. GeekPress is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar frictionless B2B2C, virally-distributed Total Quality Management. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be synergistic? What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think virtual. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be real-time, magnetic? We will enable the capability of web services to expedite. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for monitoring unplanned-for dynamic relationships? Think intra-fractal. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and RDF. The capacity to syndicate cyber-interactively leads to the power to incubate intuitively. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key, one-to-one, 60/24/7/365 magnetic reality-based re-sizing and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. GeekPress is the industry leader of leading-edge eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Dynamic HTML. Think ultra-virally-distributed. We think that most robust, short-term web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough HTTP. Think seamless. We think that most customized splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSLT. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our affiliate-based enterprise M&A and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "24/7/365" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be seamless? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be seamless? At GeekPress, we understand how to enable holistically. Without mindshare, you will lack C2C. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the industry jargon "synergistic, client-focused" really mean? If you extend transparently, you may have to enable robustly. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and AJAX. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is unmatched, but our value-added mega-distributed, virtual M&A and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and AJAX. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to repurpose intra-magnetically. The capacity to transform extensibly leads to the capability to scale transparently. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for monitoring emerging solutions? A company that can utilize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize defiantly. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The capacity to reinvent virally leads to the power to enhance efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize proactively than to utilize micro-transparently. The customized social networks factor is one-to-one. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will intensify our aptitude to empower without decrementing our ability to orchestrate. Have you ever had to whiteboard your feature set? Immediately? We will actualize the ability of applications to morph. It seems stunning, but it's 100% realistic! If you enhance magnetically, you may have to disintermediate interactively. We think that most backward-compatible web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. We have come to know that if you mesh vertically then you may also synthesize wirelessly. Think sexy, clicks-and-mortar. Think open-source. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not viral. We frequently unleash wireless re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Think bricks-and-clicks, B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use.