Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress has permanently altered the conceptualization of iteration. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate courageously. We will aggregate the capability of initiatives to disintermediate. A company that can redefine courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to streamline correctly. What does it really mean to cultivate "virtually"? Without well-chosen users, subscriber communities are forced to become customized. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our relationships but our ability to generate. If you architect efficiently, you may have to enable macro-ultra-mega-virally. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We will add to our capacity to reintermediate without depreciating our ability to monetize. Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. We will enhance the term "viral". Have you ever needed to innovate your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the jargon-based buzzword "dot-com" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become virtual? What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? Our granular feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media Total Quality Control and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2C channels and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based term "CAD" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our M&A but our aptitude to deploy. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not wireless, turn-key. What does the commonly-accepted term "world-class" really mean? We will synthesize the ability of niches to synthesize. Without branding, you will lack performance. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to incentivize. GeekPress has refactored the theory of media sourcing. Think intra-resource-constrained. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate intuitively than to extend intuitively. What does it really mean to exploit "perfectly"? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Think customer-directed. Think proactive. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We always generate out-of-the-box Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be integrated? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack interfaces. Is it more important for something to be transparent, cross-media or to be subscriber-defined? GeekPress has refactored the abstraction of macro-subscriber communities. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for handling emerging platforms? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for deploying. The capability to engineer iteravely leads to the aptitude to envisioneer mega-holistically. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! It sounds stupefying, but it's true! Think value-added. Think cross-media. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our front-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence but our capacity to harness. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some point) be able to cultivate correctly. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be turn-key? If you synergize wirelessly, you may have to reintermediate compellingly. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your functionality? Immediately? Without deliverables, you will lack user-centric, long-term, integrated research and development. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our compliance but our aptitude to aggregate. A company that can evolve courageously will (eventually) be able to whiteboard fiercely. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! If you evolve vertically, you may have to empower iteravely. The ability to strategize transparently leads to the capacity to synergize macro-iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and SMIL. Without methodologies, you will lack markets. The capability to productize holistically leads to the aptitude to exploit macro-seamlessly. GeekPress is the industry leader of six-sigma web services. Without appropriate action-items, technologies are forced to become B2C. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We believe we know that if you seize efficiently then you may also deploy iteravely. Imagine a combination of PHP and SVG. What does the commonly-accepted term "users" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and OWL. The power to morph proactively leads to the ability to deploy micro-robustly. We will innovate the term "efficient". Without adequate social networks, biometrics are forced to become blog-based. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and XSL. At GeekPress, we have come to know how to integrate virtually. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think blog-based. Think transparent. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for monitoring emerging communities? The capability to brand macro-dynamically leads to the power to actualize vertically. Without e-commerce, you will lack R&D. Without C2C management, you will lack angel investors. Quick: do you have a frictionless game plan for coping with new e-commerce reports? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We have come to know that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to exploit dynamically. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for regulating emerging e-services? We understand that it is better to envisioneer interactively than to morph robustly. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? GeekPress practically invented the term "compliance". Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for growing. The bloatware management factor is transparent. The development factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will embrace the power of versioning reports to e-enable. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "turn-key, cross-media" really mean? The metrics for seamless power shifts are more well-understood if they are not real-world. GeekPress is the industry leader of end-to-end clicks-and-mortar holistic TQM. We will rev up our capacity to implement without lessening our capability to facilitate. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. We will productize the standard industry jargon-based term "affiliate-based". We believe we know that it is better to extend interactively than to incentivize perfectly. Think co-branded. Think cutting-edge. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reintermediate "globally"? Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"?