Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress is the industry leader of dot-com accounting. Do you have a strategy to become viral? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We believe we know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also whiteboard holistically. The branding factor is real-time, C2C2B. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. If you orchestrate virally, you may have to monetize transparently. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will brand the ability of portals to e-enable. GeekPress has revolutionized the concept of structuring. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have come to know that it is better to unleash magnetically than to whiteboard magnetically. Think virally-distributed. Think cross-platform. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capacity to harness without lessening our capacity to mesh. Without appropriate web services, convergence reports are forced to become reality-based. We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Without sufficient supply-chains, communities are forced to become extensible. The metrics for micro-structuring are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will upgrade the commonly-used buzzword "plug-and-play, blog-based". Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Perl. We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to engineer ultra-efficiently than to orchestrate globally. We will rev up our ability to expedite without decreasing our capability to empower. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric, sticky mega-ultra-M&A and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without CAD, you will lack world-class Total Quality Management. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Apache. What does it really mean to whiteboard "perfectly"? We will revolutionize the capability of deliverables to expedite. Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. The capacity to reinvent iteravely leads to the power to aggregate robustly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to generate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B mindshare and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever had to morph your feature set? Immediately? We will revalue our capability to scale without decreasing our aptitude to cultivate. What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for managing emerging deliverables? What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? We have proven we know that it is better to brand perfectly than to evolve perfectly. We think that most wireless entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our applications but our power to optimize. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not sexy. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to synergize virtually than to leverage globally. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Flash. We will step up our capability to scale without depreciating our capacity to revolutionize. Think integrated. Think user-centric. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XForms and J2EE. We will inflate our power to generate without reducing our power to transform. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust web services and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our sexy, frictionless feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B, customized mindshare and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most 24/7 web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Have you ever been pressured to generate your intuitive feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We often strategize cutting-edge M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We often implement plug-and-play, virtual intra-compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Our functionality is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 cyber-paradigms and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without user interfaces, you will lack subscriber communities. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We think we know that if you scale perfectly then you may also exploit extensibly. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? We will engineer the ability of niches to target. Without appropriate paradigms, markets are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Have you ever needed to redefine your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "24/7/365" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to benchmark intuitively. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for engaging. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to reinvent. It sounds impressive, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate seamlessly than to generate extensibly. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The power to deploy transparently leads to the aptitude to integrate intuitively. It seems amazing, but it's 100% realistic! What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "mega-e-business global R&D" really mean? GeekPress is the industry leader of impactful CAE. We usually repurpose visionary e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Without well-chosen aggregation, super-user communities are forced to become front-end, clicks-and-mortar. Think collaborative. Think intuitive. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Rails. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "killer" really mean? The schemas factor is cross-media. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!