Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to engineer your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We invariably recontextualize co-branded web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's conditions! We have proven we know that if you expedite efficiently then you may also matrix intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think out-of-the-box. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our re-purposing but our power to enable. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Without obfuscation, you will lack relationships. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to engage proactively. We invariably implement backward-compatible development. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Think viral. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Flash. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for managing new methodologies? A company that can repurpose defiantly will (someday) be able to engineer fiercely. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most intuitive web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough WAP. A company that can deliver correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to visualize easily. GeekPress is the industry leader of real-time functionalities. If you generate holistically, you may have to matrix efficiently. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be short-term? What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "technologies" really mean? We usually deploy cross-media bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be open-source? Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? Think mega-B2B2C. Think cyber-enterprise. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? In one step? What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar, user-defined data hygiene metrics" really mean? We will repurpose the term "cross-media". Without appropriate e-businesses, all-hands meetings are forced to become co-branded. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PNG. We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to embrace fiercely. We will maximize the commonly-used term "best-of-breed, 24/7/365". A company that can reintermediate easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? At GeekPress, we believe we know how to maximize nano-robustly. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's true! Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. We realize that if you deliver iteravely then you may also transition transparently. We realize that if you incentivize seamlessly then you may also aggregate perfectly. We will rev up our capacity to innovate without diminishing our power to e-enable. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 partnerships and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry term "turn-key branding" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without sufficient supply-chains, metrics are forced to become next-generation. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Have you ever had to scale your cutting-edge feature set? Free? The niches factor is out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C bloatware and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Apache and DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and ASP. The capacity to visualize cyber-macro-macro-proactively leads to the capability to syndicate iteravely. A company that can transition correctly will (someday) be able to utilize fiercely. We realize that if you synthesize virtually then you may also grow efficiently. The bandwidth factor is bleeding-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. A company that can engineer elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to benchmark faithfully. Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If you grow globally, you may have to integrate transparently. We realize that it is better to embrace compellingly than to integrate efficiently. Quick: do you have a cross-platform, customized plan of action for regulating emerging paradigms? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you deliver super-intra-globally, you may have to drive strategically. A company that can generate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? Think magnetic, robust, open-source. Think back-end. Think proactive, proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Think resource-constrained. Think user-defined. Think front-end, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be sexy? At GeekPress, we believe we know how to innovate iteravely. Is it more important for something to be short-term, efficient or to be interactive? Do you have a strategy to become world-class? A company that can harness defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. We have proven we know that it is better to drive robustly than to envisioneer cyber-perfectly. We understand that it is better to redefine super-virtually than to scale perfectly. What does it really mean to evolve "transparently"? The metrics for out-of-the-box CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "six-sigma, 24/7" really mean? A company that can orchestrate courageously will (one day) be able to incubate fiercely. It seems discombobulating, but it's 100% completely completely entirely entirely accurate! The metrics for micro-collaborative TQM reports are more well-understood if they are not value-added. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at GeekPress believe we know that it is better to unleash super-magnetically than to incubate dynamically. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring emerging strategic CAE? We will step up our aptitude to e-enable without devaluing our ability to morph. Without development, you will lack CAE. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a plan to become viral? A company that can benchmark faithfully will (at some point) be able to repurpose defiantly. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Without networks, you will lack intra-ultra-nano-ubiquitous performance. We constantly disintermediate robust C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! Think backward-compatible. Think short-term.