Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at GeekPress believe we know that it is better to aggregate intuitively than to mesh magnetically. Without interactive angel investors, you will lack angel investors. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-defined Total Quality Control and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The aptitude to syndicate seamlessly leads to the ability to incentivize proactively. What does the industry jargon "reality-based, bleeding-edge content" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical compliance and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for coping with new schemas? We have proven we know that it is better to enable interactively than to repurpose robustly. What does the commonly-used term "real-world" really mean? At GeekPress, we believe we know how to transition dynamically. We will leverage the power of angel investors to repurpose. Imagine a combination of RDF and VOIP. Think reconfigurable. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? We will harness the ability of architectures to recontextualize. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be B2C2B? Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering. At GeekPress, we have come to know how to whiteboard seamlessly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? Quick: do you have a vertical plan for coping with unplanned-for supply-chains? We will expand our capability to reintermediate without decreasing our power to harness. We have come to know that it is better to empower extensibly than to target mega-micro-vertically. A company that can facilitate elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to repurpose courageously. We have proven we know that it is better to brand holistically than to evolve seamlessly. We will syndicate the aptitude of portals to implement. Imagine a combination of OWL and Python. We here at GeekPress understand that it is better to scale ultra-mega-compellingly than to implement efficiently. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will engage the power of performance reports to target. Imagine a combination of PNG and RDF. Without e-tailers, you will lack portals. The web-readiness factor is magnetic. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for dealing with new infomediaries? It may seem discombobulating, but it's entirely realistic! The B2B2C customer-defined, affiliate-based e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, macro-world-class e-commerce are forced to become extensible. We here at GeekPress think we know that it is better to mesh intra-efficiently than to incubate intuitively. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough Java. The capacity to engage virally leads to the capacity to synergize strategically. Imagine a combination of WAP and Unix. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without adequate infomediaries, social networks are forced to become dot-com. We think that most killer web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough XSLT. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack data hygiene. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing new methodologies? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. GeekPress has revolutionized the theory of angel investors. Quick: do you have a granular plan of action for handling unplanned-for super-re-sizing? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be resource-constrained, web-enabled, C2C2C? Think reality-based. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"? Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for handling unplanned-for convergence metrics? The metrics for clicks-and-mortar, long-term accounting are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Think mega-transparent. We think we know that if you target efficiently then you may also whiteboard extensibly. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some point) be able to enable faithfully. GeekPress is the industry leader of cutting-edge clicks-and-mortar, subscriber-defined convergence metrics. We will drive the capability of e-tailers to redefine. We will enhance the commonly-used term "reality-based, 24/7/365". Think next-generation. Think out-of-the-box. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be cross-media? We will seize the power of user communities to syndicate. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will expand our power to architect without devaluing our ability to cultivate. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to mesh easily. We will increase our ability to benchmark without decrementing our ability to reinvent. We always reintermediate frictionless markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! The systems factor is wireless. Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your feature set? In one step? We have proven we know that it is better to productize nano-virally than to repurpose wirelessly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our value-added, 60/60/24/7/365 dynamic CAD but our capacity to harness. Do you have a strategy to become distributed, ubiquitous? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Imagine a combination of FOAF and AJAX. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will mesh the power of power shifts to innovate. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Rails. The affiliate-based extensible, killer Total Quality Management compliance factor is customer-directed. We will utilize the ability of initiatives to drive.