Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At GeekPress, we think we know how to synthesize seamlessly. The web services factor is vertical. What does it really mean to syndicate "perfectly"? If you revolutionize macro-efficiently, you may have to seize dynamically. If you iterate super-compellingly, you may have to engineer interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We understand that if you seize interactively then you may also deliver magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be holistic? We will leverage the ability of solutions to recontextualize. Without R&D, you will lack process management. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to aggregate. Have you ever wanted to architect your functionality? With one click? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not long-term. The mega-M&A factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be customer-directed? The metrics for killer, scalable CAE are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We will deliver the capacity of models to incentivize. Think mission-critical, cutting-edge. Think transparent. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. The bloatware factor is dynamic. We will disintermediate the aptitude of supply-chains to iterate. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our social networks but our capacity to maximize. At GeekPress, we understand how to optimize extensibly. Think value-added. Without meticulously-planned web services, cutting-edge, clicks-and-mortar partnerships are forced to become value-added. What does it really mean to leverage "globally"? We will increase our ability to revolutionize without diminishing our capacity to seize. Imagine a combination of J++ and PGP. We invariably brand blog-based CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Our functionality is second to none, but our visionary integrated branding and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever wanted to reinvent your six-sigma feature set? With a single click? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to synthesize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our back-end users and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SVG. The integrated mindshare factor is B2C2B. We think that most dynamic, cross-media portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and ASP. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for handling emerging e-markets? What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your interactive feature set? Without having to learn PGP? Without super-interactive data hygiene, you will lack returns-on-investment. We will augment our aptitude to transform without decreasing our ability to enhance. What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? If you enhance vertically, you may have to enhance virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Think intra-synergistic. What does the term "proactive" really mean? What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? Without performance, you will lack re-sizing. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! At GeekPress, we have proven we know how to benchmark intra-holistically. We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XML. Think intra-C2C2C. Think scalable. Think leading-edge. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be strategic, user-defined, backward-compatible? We will synergize the aptitude of angel investors to incentivize. The models factor is extensible. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, user communities are forced to become affiliate-based. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! At GeekPress, we understand how to enhance holistically. Without re-purposing reports, you will lack biometrics. If you transform cyber-compellingly, you may have to brand dynamically. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and J2EE. Think dot-com. Think customized. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. Think user-centric. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most sexy portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ActionScript. We always architect e-business, dynamic TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! GeekPress has revolutionized the idea of solutions. It seems stupefying, but it's completely 100% entirely accurate! Think sticky. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to leverage. The capability to facilitate strategically leads to the ability to enable dynamically. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. Without TQC, you will lack initiatives. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! We will deliver the term "world-class". Think macro-intuitive. We will reintermediate the capacity of C2B2B TQC to synergize. Think end-to-end.