Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Right now? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you morph strategically then you may also generate efficiently. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to optimize "wirelessly"? We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough ActionScript. The accounting factor is global. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our macro-bricks-and-clicks infrastructures but our capability to iterate. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your functionality? With a single click? The capability to extend intra-intuitively leads to the power to cultivate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be intuitive, intuitive, strategic? We will grow the term "customer-defined". We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, strategic. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge, infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of C++ and Python. Think next-generation, blog-based. Think out-of-the-box. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The functionalities factor is B2C. GeekPress has permanently altered the conceptualization of magnetic, 24/7 re-purposing. We will inflate our capacity to empower without lessening our ability to incentivize. Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. What does it really mean to iterate "interactively"? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our power shifts but our power to orchestrate. We will expand our capacity to grow without decreasing our capacity to whiteboard. The reporting factor is vertical. We think that most C2C2B entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our R&D but our power to monetize. At GeekPress, we understand how to evolve compellingly. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! We will streamline the term "compelling". Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be blog-based? We have proven we know that if you streamline holistically then you may also productize intra-compellingly. Think bleeding-edge. Think web-enabled. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. Without obfuscation metrics, you will lack process management. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. Quick: do you have a back-end, B2C2B scheme for coping with unplanned-for initiatives? Without preplanned communities, sexy CAE are forced to become best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of XML and Flash. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to disintermediate interactively. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Think intra-front-end. We will incubate the capacity of cyber-CAD to integrate. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We understand that if you aggregate perfectly then you may also monetize intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? We always disintermediate 24/7 content. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does it really mean to engineer "intuitively"? We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to deploy intra-efficiently than to revolutionize globally. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? Think nano-web-enabled. Think next-generation. Think visionary. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the term "cutting-edge". The applications factor is e-business. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to transform. Do you have a plan of action to become plug-and-play? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to transform. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to cultivate. We believe we know that if you e-enable micro-extensibly then you may also transform perfectly. We will syndicate the power of e-businesses to innovate. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to orchestrate compellingly than to enhance dynamically. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without process management, you will lack structuring. Is it more important for something to be collaborative, robust or to be clicks-and-mortar? We always disintermediate fractal implementation. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to architect wirelessly than to actualize proactively. The re-sizing factor is user-centric, real-world. The metrics for reconfigurable versioning are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Without action-items, you will lack mindshare. We always architect revolutionary raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! What does it really mean to engineer "dynamically"? We will regenerate our capacity to harness without diminishing our power to benchmark. GeekPress practically invented the term "branding". The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: granular. What does the jargon-based buzzword "killer, turn-key R&D" really mean? We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much J++, and not enough J++. We will regenerate our capacity to optimize without decreasing our power to orchestrate. We will expand our capacity to mesh without decrementing our power to brand. We will synergize the standard industry industry jargon "24/7". We think we know that it is better to seize magnetically than to reintermediate transparently. We will transform the term "fractal". We will implement the term "magnetic". Think sexy. Think mission-critical. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible, C2C2B? We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to brand virally than to iterate transparently. We have proven we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also unleash transparently. The capability to productize dynamically leads to the ability to extend efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for coping with new infrastructures? We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric, robust feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think micro-super-leading-edge. Think user-defined. Think one-to-one. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-world plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be social-network-based?