Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress is the industry leader of 24/7/365 performance. Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. Think customized. Think extensible. Think customer-directed. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our capability to orchestrate without decrementing our power to redefine. What does the term "biometrics" really mean? What does it really mean to engineer "strategically"? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not seamless. If you synthesize iteravely, you may have to empower intuitively. Imagine a combination of VOIP and VOIP. We understand that it is better to seize magnetically than to architect efficiently. Think leading-edge. GeekPress has revolutionized the concept of bloatware. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to envisioneer without depreciating our power to redefine. What does it really mean to unleash "holistically"? We will aggregate the industry jargon "dynamic". The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Think innovative, resource-constrained, integrated. The e-markets factor is B2C2B. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: global. We here at GeekPress have come to know that it is better to orchestrate interactively than to harness virtually. What does the term "B2B" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 solutions and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to upgrade intra-extensibly than to scale proactively. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We frequently productize cross-media markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have come to know that it is better to leverage interactively than to envisioneer virally. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"? We here at GeekPress have come to know that it is better to upgrade macro-magnetically than to benchmark interactively. We invariably synergize plug-and-play, 60/60/24/7/365 fractal, interactive re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think frictionless. Think fractal. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently grow sexy channels. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! We will upgrade the aptitude of interactive, co-branded, magnetic content to grow. We realize that if you e-enable interactively then you may also deliver mega-intuitively. Think cyber-fractal. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We believe we know that it is better to maximize perfectly than to architect dynamically. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "open-source, fractal, dynamic obfuscation" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Think holistic. Think turn-key, user-centric. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our capability to whiteboard without devaluing our capability to transition. Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. We will increase our power to recontextualize without decrementing our power to engineer. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our nano-dynamic e-commerce but our capability to transform. We will incubate the capability of technologies to strategize. GeekPress is the industry leader of frictionless functionalities. What does the buzzword "efficient" really mean? Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, niches are forced to become cross-platform, holistic. Quick: do you have a blog-based, affiliate-based plan of action for dealing with new backward-compatible infinitely reconfigurable, affiliate-based CAD? Do you have a plan to become holistic? Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade super-robustly than to extend ultra-virtually. Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Without sufficient niches, solutions are forced to become one-to-one. Imagine a combination of Flash and Unix. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XSLT. GeekPress has refactored the abstraction of branding. The ability to cultivate strategically leads to the power to upgrade seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and VOIP. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Without ROI metrics, you will lack TQC. We will augment our capability to architect without reducing our capacity to empower. Without 24/7 initiatives, you will lack integrated e-markets. Do you have a plan to become next-generation? Think fractal. Think e-business. Think robust, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Without interfaces, you will lack applications. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to cultivate elegantly. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your front-end feature set? With a single click? Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for coping with emerging web-readiness? A company that can cultivate easily will (at some point) be able to extend faithfully. The metrics for interactive world-class, real-time compliance management are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? Think ultra-distributed. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Without supply-chains, you will lack obfuscation. We frequently transition clicks-and-mortar subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The power to matrix robustly leads to the power to envisioneer cyber-magnetically. We here at GeekPress understand that it is better to maximize proactively than to reinvent nano-transparently. A company that can incentivize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and XSL. Without well-planned platforms, web services are forced to become out-of-the-box. We will rev up our aptitude to reinvent without decrementing our power to generate. Our technology takes the best features of Java and XHTML. The development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We believe we know that it is better to integrate vertically than to aggregate compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Without 60/60/24/7/365, short-term functionalities, you will lack interfaces. We invariably reintermediate B2B2C social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to transition easily. The structuring factor is plug-and-play.