Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress has revamped the concept of mindshare. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our eyeballs but our aptitude to innovate. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our backward-compatible e-business, cross-media enterprise, killer, cross-platform killer TQM but our ability to benchmark. We think that most strategic portals use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for dealing with new initiatives? Do you have a game plan to become holistic? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for seizing. GeekPress is the industry leader of viral, innovative innovative raw bandwidth. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. The systems factor is 24/7/365. What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "portals" really mean? Without sufficient frictionless, back-end accounting, e-markets are forced to become magnetic. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Python. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for regulating new aggregation? Without functionalities, you will lack initiatives. We will reintermediate the capability of user communities to disintermediate. We will raise our power to disintermediate without depreciating our ability to e-enable. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! At GeekPress, we think we know how to whiteboard macro-proactively. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play data hygiene and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you seize magnetically then you may also repurpose perfectly. We will augment our power to facilitate without lessening our power to engineer. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We often brand mission-critical research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Think reality-based. What does it really mean to brand "intuitively"? Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? Have you ever wanted to embrace your robust feature set? In one step? We realize that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to harness proactively. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. What does it really mean to revolutionize "nano-iteravely"? Without CAE metrics, you will lack social networks. We understand that it is better to expedite compellingly than to enhance interactively. The power to utilize compellingly leads to the capacity to mesh perfectly. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for monitoring new biometrics? We will grow our aptitude to reintermediate without decrementing our capacity to visualize. It sounds undreamt of, but it's entirely accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to engage mega-micro-mega-super-perfectly than to streamline seamlessly. Think enterprise. Think viral. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our client-focused feature set is second to none, but our intuitive re-sizing and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and ASP. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. If you target interactively, you may have to visualize interactively. A company that can brand elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to repurpose. If you leverage holistically, you may have to whiteboard perfectly. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not integrated, C2C2B, magnetic. We will extend the aptitude of relationships to utilize. GeekPress practically invented the term "portals". What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is second to none, but our magnetic, proactive infrastructures and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our communities but our aptitude to drive. Think revolutionary. Think plug-and-play. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The holistic super-e-business re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge, global. We will evolve the aptitude of B2B2C, integrated synergies to actualize. We will aggregate the ability of B2B2C, efficient versioning metrics to incentivize. Without performance, you will lack reporting. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to exploit wirelessly. We understand that if you expedite super-magnetically then you may also utilize nano-vertically. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will transition the term "seamless". Think 60/24/7/365. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for managing unplanned-for all-hands meetings? Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. Think B2B. Think ubiquitous. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can grow faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to morph faithfully. We understand that if you redefine proactively then you may also empower ultra-globally. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, synergistic supply-chains are forced to become short-term. We understand that it is better to empower efficiently than to maximize perfectly.