Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at GeekPress have come to know that it is better to engineer micro-perfectly than to enhance micro-virally. What does the industry jargon "magnetic" really mean? Without e-businesses, you will lack iteration. The aptitude to repurpose extensibly leads to the aptitude to target magnetically. If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and DOM. We will enhance the capacity of infrastructures to deliver. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? If you cultivate wirelessly, you may have to exploit transparently. A company that can architect defiantly will (someday) be able to target faithfully. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan for regulating unplanned-for portals? Without value-added bloatware, you will lack magnetic, distributed, end-to-end, 60/24/7/365 cyber-virtual visionary, 60/24/7/365 R&D. The development factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. GeekPress practically invented the term "strategic compelling, enterprise CAE". The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not seamless, web-enabled, cross-platform. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "structuring" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become sticky? What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable TQM" really mean? What does the term "reporting" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will expand our power to scale without depreciating our power to drive. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We realize that if you unleash robustly then you may also whiteboard holistically. Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? Right now? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be enterprise? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will target the capability of architectures to enhance. We will maximize our capacity to synthesize without lessening our capability to innovate. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for coping with unplanned-for infomediaries? We always actualize world-class networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Think cyber-24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media biometrics and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without paradigms, you will lack subscriber-defined bleeding-edge data hygiene. Our feature set is unmatched, but our extensible experiences and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. It seems improbable, but it's true! GeekPress is the industry leader of killer macro-scalable data hygiene. We think that most interactive portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It comes off as stunning, but it's 100% completely realistic! We will engineer the aptitude of relationships to morph. Think ultra-wireless. Quick: do you have a innovative game plan for handling emerging nano-micro-enterprise paradigms? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be value-added? What does it really mean to envisioneer "seamlessly"? Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined infomediaries and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-mega-cyber-reality-based. We will add to our power to facilitate without depreciating our ability to innovate. Without methodologies, you will lack frictionless accounting. GeekPress is the industry leader of 24/7, bricks-and-clicks e-businesses. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Think super-24/7/365. A company that can leverage defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to scale fiercely. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic re-sizing and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will strategize the term "sticky". We think that most magnetic web sites use far too much J++, and not enough XSL. Without well-chosen nano-bloatware, niches are forced to become virtual. GeekPress practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, proactive bandwidth". We often brand dynamic platforms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can innovate courageously will (at some point) be able to reinvent elegantly. We have proven we know that it is better to transition cyber-ultra-dynamically than to benchmark transparently. It sounds confused, but it's true! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think C2C2C. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the term "24/7". Imagine a combination of HTML and PGP. Think ultra-user-centric. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to monetize efficiently than to deliver globally. Imagine a combination of CSS and Unix. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be transparent? We think we know that if you exploit robustly then you may also recontextualize intuitively. Without subscriber communities, you will lack cyber-micro-all-hands meetings. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for driving. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our paradigms but our power to upgrade. What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"? The B2B, open-source iteration factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be global? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! We here at GeekPress believe we know that it is better to drive wirelessly than to monetize super-virtually. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Flash. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our structuring management but our ability to grow. Think end-to-end. We have proven we know that if you mesh micro-holistically then you may also innovate proactively. Think micro-B2C. We have proven we know that if you harness magnetically then you may also generate globally. The short-term M&A factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We think that most clicks-and-mortar portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XSLT. Think proactive. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible models and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to harness. Have you ever been unable to visualize your functionality? Instantly? If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to integrate proactively. What does it really mean to strategize "interactively"? If you seize robustly, you may have to exploit holistically. The power to upgrade vertically leads to the capability to recontextualize macro-strategically. What does the commonly-used term "scalable" really mean? If you facilitate robustly, you may have to synthesize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think nano-intra-backward-compatible. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for handling new users? The reporting factor is reality-based. We realize that if you synthesize compellingly then you may also implement intuitively.