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Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Company Name: 

Your Randomly-Generated Corporate Gibberish:


We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our platforms but our ability to e-enable.
Have you ever needed to embrace your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! The experiences factor is cross-media. The capacity to seize vertically leads to the power to transition compellingly. The ability to unleash wirelessly leads to the capability to reintermediate vertically. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for handling emerging e-markets? We will expand our capacity to brand without diminishing our ability to integrate. We will expand our ability to extend without depreciating our capacity to strategize. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SVG. What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? If you engage micro-virally, you may have to expedite compellingly.
What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"?
We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to iterate extensibly than to redefine globally. Think sticky. We think that most social-network-based entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The accounting factor is user-centric, reconfigurable. Do you have a game plan to become world-class, B2B2C? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "nano-R&D" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. The ROI metrics factor is viral. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is!
Do you have a scheme to become impactful?
We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to utilize holistically than to evolve intuitively. Our frictionless feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based relationships and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without implementation, you will lack web-readiness. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Without re-purposing, you will lack content supervising. What does the commonly-accepted term "front-end" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Our value-added feature set is unmatched, but our cutting-edge cyber-subscriber communities and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned virtual paradigms, supply-chains are forced to become dot-com. If you strategize proactively, you may have to productize transparently. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not efficient, 24/7. A company that can e-enable easily will (eventually) be able to monetize courageously.
Think cross-platform. Think real-time, one-to-one. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time.
Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Instantly? We realize that if you aggregate mega-extensibly then you may also orchestrate proactively. Think end-to-end. Without well-chosen platforms, social networks are forced to become C2C2B. Think sticky. We will augment our power to revolutionize without depreciating our capacity to seize. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be B2B2C? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be best-of-breed? We believe we know that if you incubate extensibly then you may also revolutionize perfectly. Without well-chosen technologies, methodologies are forced to become affiliate-based.
What does the industry jargon "dot-com, customer-directed performance metrics" really mean?
GeekPress is the industry leader of subscriber-defined biometrics. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. The Total Quality Control factor is sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our seamless, real-time feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and ASP. Think killer. We believe we know that it is better to seize intuitively than to aggregate seamlessly.
Think customer-directed. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time.
GeekPress practically invented the term "schemas". The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the term "frictionless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be collaborative, 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of IIS and HTTP. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365, open-source? Think resource-constrained. We will grow our capacity to deploy without lessening our power to envisioneer. Think distributed. Think 24/7, cutting-edge. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and DOM.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation.
GeekPress has refactored the concept of eyeballs. The long-term e-business, open-source CAD factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTTP. Without appropriate eyeballs, metrics are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "next-generation" really mean? Think vertical. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize defiantly. Think collaborative. Think dot-com. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to streamline seamlessly leads to the capability to embrace ultra-strategically. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? What does it really mean to upgrade "cyber-virally"? We constantly synergize co-branded networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions!
We will increase our aptitude to matrix without decreasing our aptitude to synergize.
GeekPress has revolutionized the idea of partnerships. We will innovate the capability of e-tailers to reinvent. Without appropriate architectures, branding metrics are forced to become compelling. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our C2C but our capacity to grow. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and SVG. Without branding, you will lack convergence. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for managing emerging user interfaces? We will matrix the power of users to expedite. We have come to know that if you transition intuitively then you may also reinvent extensibly. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL.

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