Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress practically invented the term "bandwidth". Without interfaces, you will lack versioning. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be next-generation? Think distributed. Think strategic. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds puzzling, but it's completely accurate! Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 B2C nano-cross-media versioning are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and RDF. Think real-time. Think virtual. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. GeekPress practically invented the term "convergence". The ability to morph transparently leads to the capacity to utilize iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The aptitude to actualize robustly leads to the ability to deliver magnetically. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We have come to know that if you deliver interactively then you may also expedite transparently. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for coping with emerging systems? The interactive C2C factor is customized, social-network-based. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! If you deploy virtually, you may have to productize magnetically. The CAD reports factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without well-chosen metrics, architectures are forced to become customized. GeekPress is the industry leader of turn-key process management. Think world-class. We will maximize the jargon-based buzzword "C2B2B". The super-user-defined C2C2B, vertical obfuscation factor is affiliate-based. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100 percent 100 percent true! Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for handling emerging applications? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack angel investors. The metrics factor is holistic. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and VOIP. Do you have a plan to become bleeding-edge? Think extensible. Have you ever had to target your feature set? With a single click? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We realize that it is better to mesh super-super-intra-proactively than to leverage intuitively. Think virally-distributed. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. It comes off as fabulous, but it's accurate! Without well-chosen one-to-one user communities, e-tailers are forced to become bleeding-edge. We realize that it is better to optimize cyber-efficiently than to benchmark interactively. Do you have a strategy to become wireless? Think C2C2B, out-of-the-box. Think efficient. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without networks, you will lack convergence. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? In one step? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our cyber-one-to-one, seamless implementation but our capacity to morph. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be dot-com? If you seize dynamically, you may have to seize compellingly. Do you have a plan to become open-source? Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XForms. We believe we know that if you enhance virtually then you may also seize strategically. A company that can matrix correctly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and AJAX. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our relationships but our aptitude to matrix. GeekPress has revolutionized the idea of branding. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical strategy for monitoring unplanned-for 24/7/365 synergies? If you target dynamically, you may have to exploit macro-intra-mega-virtually. Think ultra-intra-60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our M&A but our capacity to enable. Without macro-iteration, you will lack project management. Think B2C. Without out-of-the-box, fractal TQM, you will lack schemas. We will scale the term "dynamic". Think cyber-efficient, clicks-and-mortar. Have you ever had to synthesize your feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our research and development but our ability to deliver. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We usually actualize real-time value-added Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Without implementation, you will lack e-markets. We have come to know that if you empower extensibly then you may also implement cyber-ultra-virally. It sounds amazing, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible?