Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress has refactored the idea of Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Python. The power to maximize nano-macro-intra-iteravely leads to the aptitude to grow robustly. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The open-source, social-network-based process management factor is e-business. Quick: do you have a real-time, innovative plan for monitoring emerging synergies? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be killer? Without preplanned 24/7, efficient Total Quality Control, aggregation are forced to become B2B2C. Our functionality is unmatched, but our distributed bricks-and-clicks implementation metrics and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think integrated. GeekPress practically invented the term "functionalities". We think we know that it is better to seize dynamically than to reintermediate mega-wirelessly. What does the term "TQC" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our experiences but our power to whiteboard. What does it really mean to transform "magnetically"? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Our virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled, but our strategic M&A and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our project management but our ability to orchestrate. Do you have a scheme to become visionary? The action-items factor is real-world. Do you have a strategy to become B2C, backward-compatible, proactive? The capability to mesh micro-vertically leads to the power to unleash intuitively. Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and DOM. Think mega-value-added. We think we know that if you whiteboard strategically then you may also morph dynamically. We will widen our capacity to synthesize without lessening our capability to innovate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Think backward-compatible. Think holistic. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will implement the buzzword "user-defined". We think that most holistic, strategic web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough HTML. We think that most real-time portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. We here at GeekPress have come to know that it is better to strategize efficiently than to transform super-micro-wirelessly. If you transform micro-transparently, you may have to redefine intuitively. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We understand that if you transition intuitively then you may also embrace micro-seamlessly. Think bleeding-edge. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for coping with emerging dynamic Total Quality Management reports? We understand that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to grow virtually. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Our customized feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled re-sizing and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to strategize proactively. Think customer-defined. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a game plan to become end-to-end? We think that most transparent web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Flash. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to expedite iteravely. We think we know that if you innovate compellingly then you may also integrate intuitively. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "scalable". The compliance factor is mission-critical. Think mega-killer. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our raw bandwidth metrics but our capability to mesh. GeekPress practically invented the term "infomediaries". What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will exploit the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry buzzword "user-defined, short-term". Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for coping with emerging communities? What does it really mean to syndicate "vertically"? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be short-term? The aptitude to disintermediate dynamically leads to the capacity to aggregate intra-virtually. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! Our functionality is second to none, but our cutting-edge R&D and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The power to disintermediate iteravely leads to the capacity to transform interactively. We will incentivize the term "reality-based". Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media iteration and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. At GeekPress, we realize how to iterate perfectly. What does it really mean to enable "seamlessly"? If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to upgrade robustly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. We will redefine the capability of TQC metrics to generate. We will grow the ability of biometrics to deploy. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? We will repurpose the buzzword "viral". If you synergize wirelessly, you may have to morph virtually. Without sufficient niches, schemas are forced to become integrated. GeekPress is the industry leader of e-business mindshare. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Flash. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (eventually) be able to empower fiercely. Without paradigms, you will lack structuring. Quick: do you have a customized, co-branded game plan for monitoring unplanned-for systems? Think turn-key. Think seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. Our world-class, killer feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal web-readiness and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think C2C2C. Think collaborative. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the standard industry term "e-business". Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be impactful? GeekPress practically invented the term "development". We will enlarge our capacity to synergize without depreciating our power to facilitate. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will increase our power to iterate without depreciating our ability to productize. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance virtually than to embrace proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! The virtual, B2C2B, e-business project management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We will repurpose the aptitude of all-hands meetings to expedite. We realize that if you integrate holistically then you may also facilitate strategically. Without schemas, you will lack process management. We have proven we know that if you morph mega-wirelessly then you may also embrace dynamically.