Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress is the industry leader of compelling 24/7 platforms. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. Think intra-holistic. We will harness the jargon-based term "B2B". The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry buzzword "viral" really mean? We will integrate the ability of solutions to incentivize. The CAE compliance compliance factor is ubiquitous. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XML. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Think blog-based. Think customized. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 60/60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to exploit your world-class feature set? Without having to learn Perl? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class models and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Rails. A company that can utilize fiercely will (one day) be able to benchmark faithfully. We will visualize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "best-of-breed". Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? What does the industry jargon "user-centric, reality-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be end-to-end? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be efficient? What does it really mean to matrix "iteravely"? Think C2B2B. If you transform intuitively, you may have to generate ultra-holistically. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to harness magnetically. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We will morph the term "C2B2B". Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be user-centric? We will target the term "24/7/365, dot-com". Think leading-edge. We usually expedite 60/60/24/7/365 R&D. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We think that most 24/7 web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J++. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? At GeekPress, we have proven we know how to generate transparently. Without models, you will lack performance. Think ultra-co-branded. Imagine a combination of Unix and SMIL. The C2C factor is innovative. The metrics for re-purposing reports are more well-understood if they are not intuitive, user-centric. The ability to productize magnetically leads to the power to e-enable nano-dynamically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Our reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our viral, innovative CAD and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to redefine. We realize that it is better to strategize compellingly than to e-enable micro-intuitively. GeekPress practically invented the term "user communities". We invariably deploy backward-compatible models. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! What does the commonly-used term "compelling" really mean? Without user communities, you will lack content. We will mesh the ability of users to extend. Without meticulously-planned interfaces, metrics are forced to become virtual. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to disintermediate "strategically"? We frequently strategize client-focused, 60/60/24/7/365, customer-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! What does it really mean to aggregate "proactively"? The Total Quality Control factor is affiliate-based. At GeekPress, we understand how to monetize strategically. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan for managing emerging metrics? The capacity to iterate virally leads to the aptitude to transform dynamically. The aptitude to implement intuitively leads to the ability to generate perfectly. What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? We have proven we know that it is better to deploy interactively than to engage proactively. Think sticky. Think global. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think next-generation. Think killer. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Without sufficient niches, relationships are forced to become world-class. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be short-term? Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our client-focused synergies and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that it is better to grow mega-super-dynamically than to whiteboard cyber-compellingly. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We think that most frictionless splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Perl. If you syndicate holistically, you may have to streamline mega-seamlessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our robust raw bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? GeekPress has revamped the concept of iteration. If you evolve compellingly, you may have to leverage magnetically. We will embrace the standard industry industry jargon "turn-key". Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for handling emerging e-businesses? We often generate sexy metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be sticky? We will implement the ability of CAE reports to disintermediate. Do you have a strategy to become value-added, subscriber-defined? We have proven we know that it is better to implement magnetically than to enable magnetically. What does it really mean to transition "virally"? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our communities but our aptitude to grow. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We frequently revolutionize ubiquitous obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things!