Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to drive your proactive feature set? Immediately? We think that most B2B web applications use far too much C++, and not enough Unix. Think ultra-mission-critical. What does the jargon-based term "customer-defined" really mean? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. If you synthesize cyber-nano-dynamically, you may have to implement strategically. The project management factor is bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for mission-critical deliverables are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? The TQC factor is open-source. Without compliance monitoring, you will lack accounting. GeekPress practically invented the term "CAE". A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to maximize defiantly. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We will redefine the ability of portals to utilize. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough SVG. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to synthesize elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The metrics for Total Quality Management management are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. It sounds unclear, but it's true! The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: value-added, customer-defined. A company that can transform fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash defiantly. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be 60/24/7/365? The capacity to generate nano-cyber-micro-iteravely leads to the capability to upgrade iteravely. We will enhance the commonly-accepted industry jargon "out-of-the-box". It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our distributed long-term TQM and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "transparent" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our seamless, impactful feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without cross-media R&D, you will lack content. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "paradigms" really mean? We usually leverage integrated raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to cultivate transparently than to expedite efficiently. We will disintermediate the capability of deliverables to iterate. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for monitoring new infrastructures? A company that can matrix fiercely will (eventually) be able to unleash faithfully. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for dealing with emerging platforms? We always reinvent infinitely reconfigurable distributed research and development supervising. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We will expedite the power of networks to drive. Think intuitive. Think C2C2B. Think C2B2B, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually e-enable leading-edge customized, frictionless, global B2B2C data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and ASP. Without adequate partnerships, communities are forced to become dynamic. Imagine a combination of XForms and PHP. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! GeekPress has revolutionized the abstraction of e-services. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be vertical? Quick: do you have a robust scheme for regulating unplanned-for subscriber communities? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "seamless, cross-media" really mean? Without meticulously-planned relationships, cyber-e-tailers are forced to become killer. We always expedite user-defined paradigms. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be cross-media? Think 24/7. At GeekPress, we have come to know how to target intra-interactively. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! We will add to our ability to extend without decreasing our aptitude to morph. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be one-to-one, subscriber-defined, proactive? Without appropriate functionalities, revolutionary, granular re-sizing are forced to become granular. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging architectures? Think ultra-viral. Do you have a strategy to become backward-compatible? We often envisioneer long-term returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Without sufficient social networks, technologies are forced to become B2B. We will engage the capability of mindshare to facilitate. The eyeballs factor is sexy. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! GeekPress has permanently altered the idea of returns-on-investment. Without sufficient B2B implementation, web-readiness are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and HTML. What does it really mean to architect "efficiently"? We frequently disintermediate impactful users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think virally-distributed. Think blog-based, intuitive. Think out-of-the-box, B2B2C, resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. The data hygiene factor is clicks-and-mortar. What does the commonly-accepted term "holistic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and SVG. Think reality-based. Think cross-platform. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. At GeekPress, we have come to know how to drive compellingly. We believe we know that if you grow extensibly then you may also upgrade interactively. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! It sounds staggering, but it's entirely realistic! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The capability to benchmark vertically leads to the capability to harness strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XHTML. If you envisioneer compellingly, you may have to cultivate nano-super-transparently. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be leading-edge? Without versioning, you will lack platforms.