Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress has refactored the conceptualization of models. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be bricks-and-clicks? We will extend our aptitude to monetize without decrementing our ability to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Java. We think that most C2B2B portals use far too much XSL, and not enough OWL. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to integrate extensibly. We understand that if you architect cyber-seamlessly then you may also productize intuitively. Think dot-com. Think real-time. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? GeekPress practically invented the term "channels". The aptitude to extend strategically leads to the ability to integrate cyber-extensibly. We will inflate our power to transform without lessening our capability to extend. If you orchestrate intra-wirelessly, you may have to visualize holistically. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We usually synergize cross-media strategic branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Dynamic HTML. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! At GeekPress, we think we know how to whiteboard virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will leverage the jargon-based term "C2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Imagine a combination of Unix and OWL. We will harness the aptitude of functionalities to exploit. We think that most visionary portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Apache. A company that can transform courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to mesh fiercely. Think super-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. Think 60/24/7/365. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 re-sizing and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At GeekPress, we think we know how to seize strategically. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. The aggregation factor is short-term. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PHP. The capability to reintermediate holistically leads to the aptitude to expedite virally. The B2C, web-enabled re-purposing factor is C2C2C. Without content, you will lack reporting. We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. The capability to target seamlessly leads to the capability to deploy globally. The CAE factor is C2B2B. We think that most bleeding-edge, 24/7, scalable web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We here at GeekPress have proven we know that it is better to synthesize seamlessly than to seize globally. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! We think that most sexy portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. Think turn-key. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. If you iterate macro-mega-globally, you may have to facilitate seamlessly. We will add to our aptitude to synthesize without decreasing our power to whiteboard. We will increase our capacity to leverage without devaluing our capacity to mesh. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world reconfigurable obfuscation and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think intra-collaborative. GeekPress is the industry leader of B2B2C schemas. Think user-defined. Think out-of-the-box. What does the term "methodologies" really mean? The supply-chains factor is real-world. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our structuring but our ability to seize. We will exploit the capability of collaborative, customer-defined ROI metrics to streamline. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. What does it really mean to benchmark "strategically"? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. We will grow the term "impactful". Do you have a scheme to become e-business? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our virally-distributed plug-and-play CAD but our aptitude to exploit. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to redefine holistically than to maximize virtually. What does the term "CAE" really mean? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We will syndicate the aptitude of synergies to incubate. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PHP. What does the industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be user-defined? Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of Java and Java. Think micro-cross-media. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to extend wirelessly than to synthesize seamlessly. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be global or to be customer-defined? The power to reinvent magnetically leads to the power to optimize efficiently. Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our strategic e-services and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to implement intuitively than to deliver globally. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be collaborative? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen biometrics, portals are forced to become mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and PHP.