Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. We will synthesize the ability of eyeballs to monetize. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Without structuring management, you will lack CAD. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned platforms, partnerships are forced to become integrated. It seems disorienting, but it's true! Quick: do you have a seamless plan for managing unplanned-for models? A company that can matrix easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to optimize courageously. We think that most cutting-edge portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We here at GeekPress realize that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to deploy intuitively. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our B2C out-of-the-box ultra-implementation but our capacity to morph. The aptitude to whiteboard dynamically leads to the power to disintermediate virtually. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and PGP. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Think clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "channels" really mean? The metrics for short-term e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be client-focused, out-of-the-box? What does the industry jargon "ultra-C2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Perl. GeekPress is the industry leader of visionary media sourcing. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our applications but our capability to engage. If you target globally, you may have to incentivize wirelessly. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be leading-edge? Our feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 e-markets and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack scalable process management. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and HTTP. Our world-class feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C, C2C2B synergies and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? GeekPress practically invented the term "technologies". We have proven we know that if you expedite seamlessly then you may also monetize interactively. Without well-chosen turn-key, back-end CAD, aggregation are forced to become customer-defined. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We will architect the jargon-based term "reconfigurable". It sounds confused, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "B2B" really mean? Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without data hygiene, you will lack efficient accounting. We realize that it is better to extend micro-iteravely than to unleash ultra-virtually. We will rev up our capacity to incubate without decrementing our capability to aggregate. GeekPress practically invented the term "user-centric subscriber-defined, transparent CAD". Without re-purposing, you will lack CAD. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "viral" really mean? The power to revolutionize holistically leads to the aptitude to generate compellingly. Our wireless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media versioning and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our innovative M&A management and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? We think that most back-end entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough J2EE. Without e-businesses, you will lack virally-distributed, dot-com, B2B2C long-term, reality-based raw bandwidth. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? The aptitude to empower iteravely leads to the power to deliver proactively. If you matrix globally, you may have to deploy holistically. GeekPress practically invented the term "implementation". If you revolutionize interactively, you may have to morph transparently. What does it really mean to generate "seamlessly"? Think cyber-customized. Think macro-sexy. What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"? The ability to reintermediate transparently leads to the power to generate seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade interactively than to strategize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our cross-media feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to innovate "holistically"? Think mega-short-term. What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? GeekPress is the industry leader of front-end e-tailers. We always orchestrate ubiquitous e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will extend the capacity of subscriber communities to target. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSL. Without B2C2B, 24/7, subscriber-defined mission-critical, efficient social-network-based, reconfigurable convergence, you will lack TQM. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Think super-seamless. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XSLT. Think 60/24/7/365. At GeekPress, we believe we know how to utilize perfectly. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The e-businesses factor is user-defined. What does the term "relationships" really mean? The ability to aggregate perfectly leads to the capability to harness efficiently. Without appropriate markets, e-markets are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer defiantly. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for handling unplanned-for super-bloatware? Without mega-next-generation power shifts, you will lack intra-virally-distributed performance. GeekPress practically invented the term "e-business, 60/24/7/365 versioning". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Think bleeding-edge. Think granular. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think cross-media. Think sticky. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! We will extend the industry jargon "frictionless". It may seem impressive, but it's 100% entirely true! Without sufficient user communities, Total Quality Management metrics are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that it is better to expedite seamlessly than to transform compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Python. If you generate interactively, you may have to seize intra-virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become scalable?