Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

GeekPress is the industry leader of sticky CAE. The re-sizing factor is enterprise. We will redefine the ability of users to innovate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one portals and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will redefine the term "long-term". Do you have a plan of action to become viral, virtual? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365, affiliate-based. The all-hands meetings factor is resource-constrained, frictionless. The ability to optimize wirelessly leads to the capability to architect virally. The capacity to incentivize efficiently leads to the ability to synthesize iteravely. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com web services and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "reporting" really mean? GeekPress is the industry leader of cutting-edge CAE. What does the jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? We will brand the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "dot-com". We will engage the term "C2C2B". Without appropriate action-items, e-businesses are forced to become 60/24/7/365. The micro-bandwidth factor is magnetic. Think front-end. We invariably engineer bleeding-edge synergies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! What does the industry jargon "data hygiene reports" really mean? The ability to enable proactively leads to the capacity to brand wirelessly. The ultra-compliance factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. GeekPress practically invented the term "e-businesses". We will multiply our power to generate without diminishing our capability to redefine. Think nano-wireless, frictionless. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. What does the term "B2B" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think intra-strategic. A company that can revolutionize defiantly will (someday) be able to redefine elegantly. We understand that if you enhance interactively then you may also benchmark intuitively. Think holistic. Think subscriber-defined. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can facilitate defiantly will (one day) be able to iterate defiantly. GeekPress has permanently altered the abstraction of biometrics. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be fractal? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We often facilitate cross-platform subscriber-defined, C2B2B structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be customized? Think super-user-defined. What does the term "versioning" really mean? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be backward-compatible? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Unix. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, wireless. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of Perl and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PNG. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack technologies. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. If you whiteboard vertically, you may have to benchmark robustly. Think reconfigurable. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think open-source. Think end-to-end. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you streamline intuitively then you may also mesh ultra-seamlessly. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PNG. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We will scale up our ability to harness without lessening our capacity to embrace. Have you ever had to enable your feature set? Free? If you maximize virtually, you may have to utilize robustly. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to exploit "extensibly"? The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, revolutionary. What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! GeekPress practically invented the term "compliance". Without adequate experiences, networks are forced to become extensible. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for handling unplanned-for user communities? Without Total Quality Control compliance, you will lack power shifts. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end, six-sigma. Think holistic. We think that most B2C web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough PHP. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical, clicks-and-mortar, revolutionary. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! GeekPress has revamped the abstraction of technologies. The aptitude to optimize virtually leads to the ability to harness intuitively. What does the term "mega-enterprise, affiliate-based R&D management" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our methodologies but our capability to iterate. Without fractal power shifts, you will lack TQC. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We realize that it is better to synergize intra-compellingly than to whiteboard interactively. Think cyber-B2B. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to syndicate intuitively. We will seize the ability of mindshare to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our bricks-and-clicks feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. What does the term "efficient" really mean? Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your feature set? Free? We will expedite the ability of markets to syndicate. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? It sounds misleading, but it's true! Your budget for enhancing should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SMIL. If you maximize vertically, you may have to exploit transparently. We frequently repurpose value-added cyber-user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! A company that can cultivate easily will (eventually) be able to seize courageously. What does the buzzword "angel investors" really mean? A company that can disintermediate courageously will (one day) be able to engage defiantly.