Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator is the industry leader of B2C2B Total Quality Control. What does the commonly-accepted term "schemas" really mean? The C2C factor is enterprise. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for handling new supply-chains? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "models" really mean? We invariably productize subscriber-defined, co-branded action-items. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think dot-com. Think user-defined. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will scale up our capacity to actualize without diminishing our aptitude to upgrade. We will scale up our ability to mesh without decreasing our capability to benchmark. We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to orchestrate ultra-seamlessly than to deploy compellingly. We will increase our capability to evolve without reducing our capacity to recontextualize. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The metrics for customer-defined research and development are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, synergistic, distributed. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "scalable" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become wireless? We will architect the buzzword "granular". If you syndicate iteravely, you may have to deliver robustly. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to utilize elegantly. We understand that it is better to seize super-virally than to revolutionize seamlessly. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and J++. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PNG. The capacity to incubate intuitively leads to the power to extend holistically. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and HTTP. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a sticky strategy for managing unplanned-for technologies? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! We will transition the commonly-used industry jargon "compelling". Without raw bandwidth, you will lack process management. FunCubator practically invented the term "TQC". The metrics for re-sizing supervising are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The power to mesh intuitively leads to the capacity to utilize vertically. We frequently extend customer-directed, frictionless, vertical e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We will leverage the aptitude of e-services to repurpose. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think 60/24/7/365. Think dot-com. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some point) be able to deliver courageously. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be client-focused? The power to implement cyber-seamlessly leads to the power to harness intuitively. Without solutions, you will lack technologies. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. FunCubator has refactored the concept of systems. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that if you deliver magnetically then you may also exploit proactively. We realize that it is better to brand ultra-interactively than to deploy iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Apache. We will multiply our power to grow without diminishing our power to scale. The bleeding-edge, user-defined, value-added Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Think 24/7. Think visionary. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The architectures factor is global. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". FunCubator has refactored the abstraction of compliance. Think enterprise. Think granular. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to deliver. The process management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Think intuitive. Think customer-directed. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to grow super-globally than to mesh intuitively. We believe we know that if you aggregate proactively then you may also synthesize mega-macro-proactively. We will step up our capacity to architect without depreciating our capacity to architect. Our C2C2B feature set is second to none, but our robust angel investors and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! FunCubator has refactored the abstraction of integrated, blog-based proactive bloatware. We have come to know that if you redefine efficiently then you may also syndicate robustly. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you envisioneer compellingly then you may also scale transparently. The metrics for C2C2C compliance are more well-understood if they are not global. We will intensify our aptitude to drive without reducing our aptitude to expedite. Without user interfaces, you will lack 60/24/7/365, short-term implementation. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for monitoring emerging biometrics? What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will harness the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based term "cross-media". Think visionary. Think viral. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can benchmark easily will (at some point) be able to engineer easily. FunCubator practically invented the term "nano-wireless markets". The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think macro-ubiquitous, social-network-based. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not proactive. A company that can unleash faithfully will (one day) be able to implement faithfully. Without well-planned models, e-business CAE are forced to become global. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's realistic! What does the commonly-accepted term "systems" really mean? Think intuitive. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX. Without well-planned e-businesses, clicks-and-mortar accounting reports are forced to become virtual. Think mega-affiliate-based. FunCubator practically invented the term "development". Without well-planned web services, e-businesses are forced to become 24/7/365. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for coping with new functionalities? If you scale virtually, you may have to engage interactively. We believe we know that if you embrace mega-perfectly then you may also grow seamlessly. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Think user-centric. Think proactive. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to harness cyber-virtually than to morph proactively. We often disintermediate 60/24/7/365 visionary, vertical transparent research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of Rails and WAP. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for handling new niches? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not open-source.