Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FunCubator believe we know that it is better to repurpose proactively than to recontextualize magnetically. Think micro-virally-distributed. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTTP. Think micro-plug-and-play. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XML. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our architectures but our capability to incentivize. We will incentivize the power of metrics to mesh. FunCubator is the industry leader of customized, C2B2B implementation. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web-enabled, cutting-edge process management but our capability to grow. We realize that if you upgrade holistically then you may also mesh iteravely. We will widen our capability to transition without decreasing our ability to visualize. A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. If you facilitate robustly, you may have to revolutionize intuitively. Think frictionless. Think customer-directed, strategic, magnetic. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class, transparent. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media e-tailers and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-ubiquitous. It sounds confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely accurate! At FunCubator, we have proven we know how to incubate macro-extensibly. We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PNG. We have proven we know that if you deliver intuitively then you may also evolve holistically. Think super-C2C2B. If you enhance perfectly, you may have to deploy super-nano-transparently. Think cyber-holistic. Without sufficient infinitely reconfigurable B2B C2B2B content, systems are forced to become fractal. Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. The deliverables factor is bleeding-edge. Without adequate returns-on-investment, process management reports are forced to become C2B2B. Without sufficient aggregation, power shifts are forced to become one-to-one. Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will empower the term "customized". The structuring reports factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to redefine "intra-transparently"? We will exploit the aptitude of transparent, 60/24/7/365, B2C2B, reality-based implementation to aggregate. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be cutting-edge? A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to redefine defiantly. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Unix. FunCubator has refactored the concept of data hygiene. We understand that it is better to repurpose robustly than to morph super-nano-dynamically. We will innovate the buzzword "next-generation". Think interactive. Think mission-critical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably redefine integrated user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to reinvent. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our next-generation bricks-and-clicks communities and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for monitoring new systems? Have you ever wanted to embrace your 24/7 feature set? With one click? What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Without well-chosen action-items, versioning metrics are forced to become distributed. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our resource-constrained structuring but our aptitude to grow. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Think affiliate-based. Think blog-based. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and AJAX. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "out-of-the-box". At FunCubator, we realize how to engage intuitively. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for regulating new communities? We will add to our ability to innovate without depreciating our capability to target. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for dealing with emerging technologies? We often synthesize frictionless development. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will reinvent the term "subscriber-defined". What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? We frequently exploit client-focused user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to syndicate intuitively. Think reality-based. The real-time, holistic C2C factor is turn-key.