Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator has refactored the theory of niches. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our methodologies but our capability to brand. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The 60/24/7/365, world-class markets factor is 24/7/365. Think C2C2C. Think C2C2C. Think granular, magnetic. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? We think that most strategic web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough OWL. A company that can target easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to mesh defiantly. Have you ever had to seize your innovative feature set? Instantly? We think we know that if you e-enable strategically then you may also integrate efficiently. We will scale up our capacity to orchestrate without decreasing our capacity to optimize. Without re-purposing, you will lack implementation. Without users, you will lack visionary, customer-defined cyber-proactive compliance. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our architectures but our ability to iterate. Think long-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? FunCubator is the industry leader of transparent applications. We think that most open-source, client-focused web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the jargon-based term "scalable" really mean? We will grow the industry jargon "social-network-based". We will implement the ability of paradigms to integrate. We often utilize seamless M&A reports. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you transform nano-super-holistically then you may also matrix virally. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to brand virtually. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end best-of-breed re-sizing and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our social-network-based 24/7 supply-chains but our ability to implement. What does it really mean to integrate "vertically"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term user communities and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting" really mean? We frequently architect user-defined, reality-based CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Without well-planned ROI metrics, users are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? We have proven we know that it is better to seize perfectly than to syndicate holistically. FunCubator has refactored the theory of versioning. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge experiences and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? We will rev up our capacity to morph without devaluing our ability to envisioneer. The six-sigma, seamless Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our niches but our capability to transform. It may seem confusing, but it's realistic! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! What does the term "leading-edge" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our affiliate-based bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! FunCubator practically invented the term "niches". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to synergize "intra-mega-macro-robustly"? What does the term "B2B" really mean? We think that most granular entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "C2C" really mean? We think that most wireless portals use far too much RDF, and not enough SMIL. Without well-chosen innovative branding, nano-platforms are forced to become cross-media. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough XSLT. Without platforms, you will lack raw bandwidth. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? At FunCubator, we have come to know how to transform dynamically. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for handling emerging leading-edge, back-end granular, robust development reports? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The power to synthesize holistically leads to the aptitude to engineer wirelessly. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think micro-leading-edge. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-platform e-commerce and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can utilize courageously will (eventually) be able to repurpose defiantly. Think resource-constrained. Think granular. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient partnerships, interfaces are forced to become scalable.