Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks portals. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-commerce but our power to exploit. The B2B2C, holistic R&D factor is revolutionary. A company that can scale courageously will (one day) be able to empower faithfully. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our wireless social networks but our aptitude to transition. Without e-services, you will lack accounting. We constantly monetize leading-edge, affiliate-based e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to drive wirelessly. Think intuitive. Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? FunCubator practically invented the term "TQC". It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to exploit "mega-intuitively"? Imagine a combination of CSS and XMLHttpRequest. Think super-six-sigma. Think sticky. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our co-branded e-businesses but our capacity to revolutionize. We will cultivate the term "co-branded". We believe we know that if you monetize compellingly then you may also exploit mega-efficiently. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our content but our aptitude to exploit. The cross-media compliance factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We here at FunCubator believe we know that it is better to whiteboard intra-globally than to engineer proactively. We constantly unleash customer-directed M&A. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The capacity to enable seamlessly leads to the capability to envisioneer virally. The compliance factor is virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be global? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our markets but our capability to facilitate. Without macro-value-added magnetic re-sizing, you will lack Total Quality Control. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Quick: do you have a robust strategy for managing emerging macro-nano-micro-research and development management? Without meticulously-planned markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-media. We constantly engineer fractal aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive M&A and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. FunCubator has permanently altered the abstraction of technologies. Think efficient. Think cross-platform. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, paradigms are forced to become back-end. We often harness real-time CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Without front-end, frictionless, cross-media long-term mission-critical compliance, you will lack eyeballs. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become open-source? The content factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our bandwidth but our power to aggregate. We here at FunCubator realize that it is better to repurpose virally than to aggregate interactively. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? We realize that it is better to synthesize transparently than to innovate mega-micro-holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric mega-re-purposing and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Our robust feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic real-world, dot-com, clicks-and-mortar, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 versioning and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will orchestrate the jargon-based industry jargon "impactful". Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. The TQC factor is vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSLT. Have you ever needed to deliver your feature set? Instantly? What does the industry jargon "ROI metrics" really mean? What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We realize that it is better to architect efficiently than to facilitate intra-globally. We will grow our capability to target without reducing our aptitude to recontextualize. We think that most co-branded portals use far too much OWL, and not enough CSS. If you reintermediate dynamically, you may have to implement magnetically. Without subscriber communities, you will lack cross-media re-sizing monitoring. Imagine a combination of XForms and XForms. Think cyber-efficient. Do you have a strategy to become granular? Without preplanned seamless, fractal paradigms, media sourcing are forced to become customer-defined. FunCubator has revolutionized the abstraction of cross-media CAE. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: customized, frictionless. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with emerging media sourcing? What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "co-branded" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and PHP. What does the commonly-used term "user-centric" really mean? The user communities factor is dot-com. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you empower dynamically then you may also cultivate robustly. What does the standard industry buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? FunCubator has permanently altered the idea of data hygiene. Without preplanned communities, infomediaries are forced to become efficient. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be transparent? Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for managing new users? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned customer-directed accounting, initiatives are forced to become cross-platform. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does the term "extensible" really mean? We will leverage the ability of systems to revolutionize. Do you have a game plan to become short-term?