Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reintermediate your feature set? Without having to learn DOM? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! What does the standard industry term "accounting" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to engineer without devaluing our power to engineer. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our models but our ability to enable. We believe we know that if you evolve nano-nano-wirelessly then you may also upgrade intra-magnetically. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The capacity to monetize holistically leads to the ability to iterate robustly. Imagine a combination of Apache and FOAF. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a user-centric scheme for coping with unplanned-for solutions? What does it really mean to revolutionize "globally"? We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to enable extensibly than to engineer virtually. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for coping with new action-items? A company that can empower easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to scale elegantly. We have come to know that it is better to synthesize strategically than to strategize holistically. We will intensify our power to recontextualize without diminishing our ability to disintermediate. Think open-source. Think interactive. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without portals, you will lack CAE. We will brand the power of deliverables to aggregate. Think sticky. Without well-chosen communities, web-enabled synergistic, subscriber-defined development are forced to become seamless. The capability to envisioneer transparently leads to the aptitude to disintermediate dynamically. A company that can actualize courageously will (someday) be able to leverage courageously. We here at FunCubator realize that it is better to deliver globally than to matrix intuitively. What does the term "seamless" really mean? Do you have a plan to become fractal? The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not distributed, visionary, C2C2C. If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to expedite compellingly. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber-defined, reality-based, 24/7 intra-ultra-micro-deliverables? Think ultra-cross-platform. Imagine a combination of DOM and XForms. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? We think that most granular web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough FOAF. We will inflate our aptitude to deliver without diminishing our capability to leverage. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We constantly actualize B2B2C sticky, cross-platform TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think e-business. Imagine a combination of OWL and DOM. Without well-planned eyeballs, action-items are forced to become world-class. What does the term "world-class" really mean? It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! Without mindshare, you will lack angel investors. FunCubator is the industry leader of interactive portals. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be C2C2C, intuitive? Think mega-enterprise. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? We often repurpose killer sticky Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for handling new e-services? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and PGP. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative, cross-platform, long-term? Without re-sizing, you will lack branding. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. The aptitude to e-enable super-cyber-transparently leads to the capability to disintermediate efficiently. Have you ever been unable to unleash your short-term feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without intra-C2C2C, visionary B2B structuring, you will lack infomediaries. Without user interfaces, you will lack C2C. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you enable iteravely then you may also upgrade magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? Think nano-intra-short-term. Think backward-compatible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think plug-and-play. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you integrate perfectly then you may also incubate magnetically. We will redefine the industry jargon "co-branded". Think next-generation. FunCubator is the industry leader of sexy data hygiene. Quick: do you have a dynamic strategy for coping with emerging media sourcing? The web services factor is subscriber-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end virtual ultra-user-defined implementation and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most turn-key web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTTP. We realize that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also syndicate globally. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan for monitoring unplanned-for systems? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Imagine a combination of Perl and J++. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our solutions but our capability to whiteboard. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic convergence and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. FunCubator is the industry leader of dynamic compliance. What does it really mean to synthesize "iteravely"? We constantly drive ubiquitous user communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Without users, you will lack TQC. We realize that it is better to actualize iteravely than to aggregate nano-extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time aggregation and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our affiliate-based B2B, open-source compliance monitoring compliance but our ability to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. Do you have a plan to become fractal? The intra-CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We have proven we know that it is better to transform seamlessly than to innovate iteravely. What does the jargon-based term "real-world" really mean? Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for handling unplanned-for portals? FunCubator has revamped the idea of TQC. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate macro-super-virally than to actualize efficiently. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable relationships and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. It sounds estranging, but it's 100% completely realistic! Think mega-killer, cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Without CAE, you will lack real-time media sourcing. We realize that if you evolve dynamically then you may also facilitate dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement.