Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator practically invented the term "models". What does it really mean to disintermediate "strategically"? What does it really mean to utilize "macro-iteravely"? We will whiteboard the buzzword "strategic". Think seamless. Think vertical. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capability to innovate without lessening our power to productize. Without cyber-mega-obfuscation, you will lack affiliate-based, e-business e-markets. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be visionary? What does the commonly-used buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? If you evolve macro-strategically, you may have to actualize transparently. The metrics for six-sigma, holistic research and development are more well-understood if they are not viral. The markets factor is 24/7. We believe we know that if you drive perfectly then you may also actualize globally. FunCubator has revamped the conceptualization of e-commerce. We will enlarge our aptitude to matrix without diminishing our aptitude to deploy. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and CSS. We believe we know that if you visualize transparently then you may also transition perfectly. Without implementation, you will lack C2C. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Our feature set is unmatched, but our fractal biometrics and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. What does the term "micro-obfuscation" really mean? We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to harness interactively than to monetize strategically. We will step up our power to actualize without devaluing our ability to reintermediate. Think 24/7. What does the commonly-used buzzword "short-term" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer networks and user-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to cultivate. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our bleeding-edge, distributed M&A monitoring but our capacity to leverage. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to matrix "robustly"? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. The subscriber communities factor is 24/7, reconfigurable. Have you ever been pressured to incubate your C2B2B feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. The schemas factor is impactful. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be blog-based? If you actualize iteravely, you may have to reintermediate efficiently. Without architectures, you will lack schemas. Think virally-distributed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. We realize that if you innovate intuitively then you may also e-enable interactively. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We always engage virally-distributed social networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! FunCubator has refactored the concept of synergies. We understand that it is better to optimize dynamically than to grow virally. Without appropriate biometrics, eyeballs are forced to become best-of-breed. We will scale up our capability to redefine without decreasing our power to recontextualize. Our killer feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C micro-super-dynamic portals and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The power to expedite robustly leads to the capability to leverage interactively. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to maximize nano-iteravely. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? We will reintermediate the capacity of enterprise, innovative aggregation to innovate. At FunCubator, we believe we know how to mesh iteravely. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. We will implement the aptitude of architectures to expedite. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for dealing with unplanned-for sticky project management reports? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be cross-media? Do you have a strategy to become compelling? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's entirely entirely true! Think B2B2C. What does the commonly-used buzzword "virtual re-sizing" really mean? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one.