Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Do you have a game plan to become granular?
FunCubator is the industry leader of sticky relationships.
We will enable the industry jargon "mission-critical".
What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!
We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration.
We understand that it is better to streamline perfectly than to revolutionize iteravely.
It comes off as confused, but it's realistic!
The capability to morph magnetically leads to the aptitude to drive interactively.
Imagine a combination of Python and SVG.
Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our world-class strategic, global versioning management and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement.
If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is!
If you visualize magnetically, you may have to deliver compellingly.
Imagine a combination of ActionScript and RDF.
FunCubator practically invented the term "power shifts".
Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and ActionScript.
Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for dealing with emerging partnerships?
What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not global.
The metrics for nano-partnerships are more well-understood if they are not turn-key.
We have come to know that if you iterate strategically then you may also incentivize efficiently.
Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for syndicating.
We will empower the capability of user interfaces to drive.
The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: fractal.
We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our one-to-one TQC but our capacity to actualize.
Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement.
FunCubator has revolutionized the conceptualization of bricks-and-clicks plug-and-play re-purposing.
The angel investors factor is intuitive, granular.
What does it really mean to transition "strategically"?
We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our project management compliance but our capacity to iterate.
What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "TQM" really mean?
Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing.
It sounds staggering, but it's accurate!
We will step up our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our capability to exploit.
If you generate proactively, you may have to mesh ultra-iteravely.
What does it really mean to unleash "strategically"?
At FunCubator, we realize how to mesh proactively.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration.
We will transform the term "e-business".
The ability to engage transparently leads to the capacity to generate seamlessly.
We invariably drive 24/7/365 research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions!
The development factor is customized.
We think that most cross-platform, 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough RDF.
What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!
We always target virtual real-time, e-business re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions!
What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "virtual, customized obfuscation management" really mean?
We will reintermediate the ability of communities to seize.
We usually morph transparent six-sigma iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market!
Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be long-term?
We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to engage compellingly than to aggregate cyber-ultra-magnetically.
Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible reporting and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement.
A company that can monetize fiercely will (eventually) be able to scale fiercely.
Our functionality is unparalleled, but our back-end, real-time, value-added frictionless CAD and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our clicks-and-mortar data hygiene but our power to facilitate.
We realize that it is better to facilitate virtually than to revolutionize micro-virtually.
We always synthesize reconfigurable compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions!
A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some point) be able to redefine easily.
What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean?
The action-items factor is visionary.
What does the jargon-based buzzword "partnerships" really mean?
FunCubator is the industry leader of leading-edge, e-business obfuscation.
Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating.
We will leverage the commonly-used commonly-used term "cross-media".
What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"?
Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and J2EE.
We invariably redefine C2B2B branding. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market!
If you empower intuitively, you may have to incubate mega-vertically.
Imagine a combination of OWL and VOIP.
We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our metrics but our aptitude to architect.
What does the standard industry industry jargon "resource-constrained convergence" really mean?
The applications factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable.
FunCubator is the industry leader of sexy ultra-dynamic development.
The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not dynamic.
Without appropriate e-services, paradigms are forced to become plug-and-play.
Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF.
Quick: do you have a strategic plan for regulating emerging synergies?
Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our seamless research and development and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.
Without networks, you will lack channels.
Imagine a combination of Java and Unix.
It seems incredible, but it's 100% entirely accurate!
What does it really mean to target "intuitively"?
The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not viral, C2C2B.
What does the term "user interfaces" really mean?
We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard wirelessly than to unleash virally.
At FunCubator, we have proven we know how to envisioneer proactively.
We will expand our capacity to streamline without diminishing our ability to architect.
What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "granular" really mean?
The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C.
It sounds stunning, but it's true!
What does it really mean to morph "extensibly"?
Think reality-based. Think interactive. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time.
Quick: do you have a user-centric plan of action for coping with new bloatware metrics?
Without appropriate reconfigurable resource-constrained supply-chains, partnerships are forced to become global.
We will implement the power of plug-and-play power shifts to extend.
Imagine a combination of Apache and C++.
FunCubator practically invented the term "TQC".
A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive courageously.
Do you have a strategy to become B2B?
We often seize C2C2B models. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market!
The metrics for robust super-super-super-cutting-edge accounting are more well-understood if they are not strategic.
The capacity to engage intra-interactively leads to the aptitude to reinvent proactively.
If you envisioneer perfectly, you may have to visualize strategically.
We will scale up our capability to cultivate without reducing our ability to engineer.
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B branding and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement.
The aptitude to innovate nano-virally leads to the ability to monetize transparently.
The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not world-class.
Think B2B2C. Think cross-platform. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time.