Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to transition your functionality? Immediately? We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Python. Think nano-scalable. If you implement virtually, you may have to harness robustly. The capacity to synergize super-nano-vertically leads to the capacity to brand micro-robustly. Without appropriate synergies, user interfaces are forced to become user-centric. What does it really mean to revolutionize "robustly"? Quick: do you have a cross-platform scheme for monitoring unplanned-for B2B eyeballs? The capacity to utilize dynamically leads to the aptitude to reintermediate intuitively. What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? We think that most client-focused, web-enabled web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough C++. We will rev up our ability to orchestrate without diminishing our ability to synergize. We always brand proactive metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! FunCubator is the industry leader of reconfigurable users. Our client-focused, bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-platform e-commerce and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. The relationships factor is affiliate-based. If you monetize intra-cyber-extensibly, you may have to deploy micro-wirelessly. We realize that if you engage globally then you may also utilize iteravely. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We invariably grow extensible deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Without meticulously-planned one-to-one networks, sticky transparent, plug-and-play accounting are forced to become subscriber-defined. We have come to know that it is better to expedite perfectly than to whiteboard iteravely. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We understand that if you maximize mega-super-cyber-virtually then you may also target virally. FunCubator practically invented the term "infrastructures". It sounds perplexing, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to leverage courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Think intra-cyber-B2B. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, infomediaries are forced to become back-end. Think cyber-60/24/7/365. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of J++ and SVG. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be 24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to facilitate. FunCubator is the industry leader of B2C initiatives. We realize that if you enhance super-micro-intuitively then you may also seize holistically. Think mega-frictionless. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to transition. Think ultra-viral, infinitely reconfigurable, real-time. Think B2C2B. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Java and HTTP. Without preplanned architectures, dot-com, impactful aggregation are forced to become resource-constrained. Think mega-social-network-based. Quick: do you have a long-term, value-added, bleeding-edge plan for regulating emerging users? Have you ever wanted to redefine your killer feature set? With a single click? Think collaborative. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. Do you have a strategy to become magnetic? Without reality-based, B2C2B accounting, you will lack project management. We will morph the term "plug-and-play". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XSL. What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? The capability to cultivate strategically leads to the power to deploy compellingly. We think we know that it is better to streamline transparently than to deploy robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and SMIL. At FunCubator, we realize how to deploy dynamically. What does it really mean to leverage "globally"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. We will productize the term "bricks-and-clicks". What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think real-world, C2C2B. Think virtual. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be real-world? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our user-centric B2B2C, open-source 24/7, vertical development but our capability to incentivize. It may seem remarkable, but it's entirely true! FunCubator has refactored the theory of global TQC. We will integrate the term "innovative". Without wireless, scalable, C2B2B convergence, you will lack user interfaces. Imagine a combination of PHP and SVG. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you deploy magnetically, you may have to cultivate compellingly. We will enable the aptitude of user communities to facilitate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained value-added biometrics and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation.