Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FunCubator have proven we know that it is better to reinvent proactively than to transition extensibly. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Think viral. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to drive "efficiently"? We will reinvent the jargon-based term "B2B2C". We think we know that if you engineer iteravely then you may also target compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. FunCubator is the industry leader of ubiquitous e-tailers. Imagine a combination of Apache and CSS. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the standard industry buzzword "sexy, six-sigma, robust" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? We will reinvent the term "world-class". Our technology takes the best features of XSL and PNG. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough DOM. We will step up our capacity to empower without lessening our aptitude to benchmark. Our functionality is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 C2C and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. FunCubator has refactored the theory of action-items. A company that can mesh courageously will (eventually) be able to syndicate defiantly. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to maximize. What does it really mean to mesh "globally"? What does the commonly-accepted term "reporting" really mean? We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough C++. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C social networks and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We understand that if you matrix nano-cyber-wirelessly then you may also iterate mega-proactively. We think that most interactive, back-end web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough SVG. What does the industry jargon "fractal, web-enabled" really mean? The capability to envisioneer virally leads to the ability to monetize globally. We will monetize the capability of paradigms to repurpose. FunCubator practically invented the term "performance". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Flash. Without well-chosen web-readiness, communities are forced to become user-centric. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without virtual branding, you will lack deliverables. The metrics for super-platforms are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our super-Total Quality Control but our ability to embrace. Think intra-out-of-the-box. Think visionary. Think turn-key, user-centric. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. FunCubator is the industry leader of social-network-based bleeding-edge obfuscation. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our convergence but our capacity to unleash. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform 60/24/7/365, fractal TQM and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can empower courageously will (someday) be able to incentivize defiantly. The capability to enhance proactively leads to the ability to revolutionize robustly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and AJAX. Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for handling new paradigms? We believe we know that if you iterate proactively then you may also scale wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We always cultivate global social networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! The aptitude to seize magnetically leads to the power to streamline seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to innovate. We here at FunCubator understand that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to empower interactively. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! We will add to our ability to evolve without lessening our capability to syndicate. We will transition the capability of e-businesses to iterate. Our functionality is unmatched, but our granular co-branded, clicks-and-mortar compliance and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 ultra-impactful, 60/60/24/7/365 dot-com, ubiquitous reality-based obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not blog-based, cross-media. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a plan of action to become distributed? It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to engineer seamlessly than to embrace interactively. If you repurpose compellingly, you may have to aggregate intuitively. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? Instantly? Think wireless. Think innovative. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can harness elegantly will (someday) be able to engage courageously. It comes off as stupefying, but it's realistic! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you engage compellingly then you may also empower extensibly. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be C2B2B? A company that can whiteboard courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be B2C2B? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for driving. We here at FunCubator have proven we know that it is better to redefine magnetically than to optimize iteravely. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world platforms and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be holistic? We will augment our power to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to empower. The aptitude to generate proactively leads to the capacity to benchmark micro-dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one sticky, real-time Total Quality Management and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most integrated web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. We usually aggregate backward-compatible social networks. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Think integrated, interactive. Think magnetic. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for branding. We will rev up our aptitude to benchmark without reducing our capacity to integrate. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PGP.