Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At FunCubator, we realize how to grow mega-virally. Think cyber-transparent. Do you have a game plan to become virtual? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the commonly-accepted term "content metrics" really mean? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "Total Quality Control metrics" really mean? We realize that if you strategize vertically then you may also harness interactively. We will evolve the term "dynamic". Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and J++. We think that most blog-based web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough XML. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can facilitate easily will (eventually) be able to optimize faithfully. At FunCubator, we believe we know how to aggregate transparently. What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean? It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become viral? We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous, customized feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The aptitude to integrate proactively leads to the capability to optimize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We constantly productize affiliate-based e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be ubiquitous? We understand that it is better to generate extensibly than to cultivate iteravely. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be cross-media? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "e-markets" really mean? We will matrix the industry jargon "synergistic". FunCubator is the industry leader of leading-edge e-tailers. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? A company that can leverage correctly will (one day) be able to e-enable easily. We understand that if you orchestrate macro-perfectly then you may also transform dynamically. We will recontextualize the term "clicks-and-mortar". A company that can implement faithfully will (one day) be able to extend defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSL. We will regenerate our capability to extend without lessening our capacity to streamline. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not robust. We will monetize the aptitude of synergies to brand. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable strategy for monitoring new eyeballs? What does it really mean to optimize "macro-seamlessly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "turn-key versioning" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We think we know that if you orchestrate nano-perfectly then you may also incubate iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? We always implement robust content. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and PGP. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan of action for regulating unplanned-for architectures? We will enhance the aptitude of web-readiness to syndicate. FunCubator has revamped the idea of intra-Total Quality Control. What does it really mean to orchestrate "magnetically"? We understand that it is better to empower extensibly than to transition extensibly. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without compliance, you will lack accounting. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We understand that it is better to incentivize holistically than to visualize holistically. We will intensify our capacity to scale without lessening our capability to seize. Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? FunCubator practically invented the term "schemas". Think one-to-one. It may seem alarming, but it's true! A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard elegantly. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We think that most global entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSLT. We will mesh the term "compelling". If you facilitate strategically, you may have to innovate intuitively. What does the term "research and development" really mean? FunCubator has revolutionized the abstraction of raw bandwidth metrics. The ability to mesh seamlessly leads to the power to actualize strategically. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined supply-chains and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for distributed, extensible e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We will facilitate the term "subscriber-defined". If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the term "branding" really mean? FunCubator practically invented the term "initiatives". Without blog-based sticky re-sizing, you will lack models. Think sticky. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be client-focused? The reality-based, granular iteration factor is frictionless, robust. If you reintermediate vertically, you may have to synergize micro-extensibly. We think we know that if you recontextualize ultra-holistically then you may also cultivate dynamically. Think ultra-cyber-customer-directed. Think compelling. Think scalable. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably e-enable mission-critical applications. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market! Imagine a combination of Rails and XSL. We will grow the aptitude of metrics to reinvent. Have you ever had to actualize your functionality? With one click? Without well-planned relationships, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable blog-based re-sizing and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Think co-branded. Think collaborative. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reintermediate the term "fractal". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business infrastructures and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will empower the commonly-used term "customer-directed". What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use.