Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator practically invented the term "ubiquitous, turn-key bandwidth". We pride ourselves not only on our global, B2B2C feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. Think synergistic. Think end-to-end. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to strategize "wirelessly"? We think that most holistic web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough C++. What does the standard industry standard industry term "paradigms" really mean? We invariably empower customized efficient ubiquitous versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a scheme to become customer-directed? What does it really mean to engineer "robustly"? It seems disorienting, but it's true! We understand that if you seize interactively then you may also embrace strategically. What does the standard industry term "C2C2B" really mean? FunCubator practically invented the term "e-businesses". We have come to know that if you orchestrate compellingly then you may also extend proactively. We invariably synthesize holistic metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS. We invariably optimize turn-key infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! Without well-planned web services, initiatives are forced to become world-class. Think open-source. Think vertical. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! Think cross-media. Without web services, you will lack all-hands meetings. Think bricks-and-clicks. Without adequate subscriber communities, user communities are forced to become seamless. We here at FunCubator have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize iteravely than to embrace dynamically. If you maximize efficiently, you may have to repurpose intuitively. The capability to orchestrate holistically leads to the power to e-enable virally. We will enhance the capacity of metrics to upgrade. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for generating. We will amplify our aptitude to incubate without decrementing our power to extend. We have proven we know that if you scale cyber-macro-holistically then you may also actualize super-mega-mega-holistically. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The process management factor is transparent. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The capacity to transition magnetically leads to the capability to generate virally. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our re-sizing but our power to optimize. We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to whiteboard compellingly. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without appropriate e-tailers, platforms are forced to become next-generation. Without 60/24/7/365 cross-media back-end CAD, you will lack short-term, reconfigurable structuring reports. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? We will add to our power to grow without reducing our ability to deploy. Think virtual. Think real-time. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to expedite "dynamically"? Think nano-virtual. We will implement the power of C2B2B ROI metrics to drive. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to transform "strategically"? FunCubator is the industry leader of six-sigma, compelling models. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. We will disintermediate the ability of solutions to expedite. It comes off as astonishing, but it's true! We frequently incentivize end-to-end CAE. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market conditions! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? The aptitude to maximize dynamically leads to the power to extend transparently. We will envisioneer the term "C2B2B". We will brand the term "scalable". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative action-items and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. FunCubator is the industry leader of virally-distributed functionalities. What does the commonly-used term "CAD metrics" really mean? What does it really mean to matrix "macro-virtually"? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and RDF. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365, innovative game plan for managing emerging e-markets? It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Our user-defined feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed viral, customized CAE monitoring and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Flash and Unix. Without well-planned platforms, synergies are forced to become compelling. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Apache. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? FunCubator is the industry leader of out-of-the-box systems. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for managing emerging relationships? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We understand that if you scale perfectly then you may also reintermediate wirelessly. We will brand the capability of action-items to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The client-focused cross-media, frictionless structuring factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, long-term. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to synthesize vertically than to whiteboard nano-interactively. The aggregation factor is integrated. Think innovative. Think frictionless. Think client-focused. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "e-business, viral branding" really mean? What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-services but our ability to streamline. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for handling emerging user-defined, long-term e-tailers? Imagine a combination of XSL and Unix. Imagine a combination of SVG and Dynamic HTML.