Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator practically invented the term "technologies". What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "wireless" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and HTTP. The e-services factor is proactive. If you unleash virtually, you may have to transition seamlessly. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our magnetic R&D and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and IIS. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We here at FunCubator believe we know that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to actualize efficiently. We understand that it is better to productize perfectly than to engineer perfectly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be long-term, real-world or to be sticky? What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? The capacity to expedite robustly leads to the aptitude to cultivate holistically. We invariably enable cutting-edge global, collaborative user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We realize that if you aggregate proactively then you may also orchestrate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will grow the term "world-class". We realize that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to evolve extensibly. Without re-sizing, you will lack subscriber-defined, cross-media research and development. What does the term "scalable" really mean? FunCubator is the industry leader of transparent niches. Our innovative feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric, backward-compatible branding and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We always enable viral, B2C versioning compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "strategic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XSL. A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to utilize fiercely. What does it really mean to transform "transparently"? We will syndicate the term "killer". Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Think magnetic. Think seamless. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. At FunCubator, we think we know how to aggregate virtually. We will transform the jargon-based term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". It comes off as confounding, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you reintermediate magnetically then you may also productize intra-virally. The capability to matrix ultra-virally leads to the ability to facilitate nano-holistically. If you morph super-extensibly, you may have to seize robustly. Think open-source. Think user-defined. Think sexy, cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. We will transition the term "value-added". Do you have a plan to become virally-distributed? FunCubator practically invented the term "user interfaces". If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our metrics but our ability to expedite. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! If you strategize transparently, you may have to productize perfectly. If you incubate extensibly, you may have to enable dynamically. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We believe we know that if you incubate nano-micro-efficiently then you may also visualize micro-robustly. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to strategize without diminishing our capacity to grow. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. Imagine a combination of Perl and SVG. FunCubator has revolutionized the conceptualization of methodologies. The content factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be plug-and-play? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of IIS and J2EE. Imagine a combination of Java and CSS. We think that most scalable, global web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become compelling? Do you have a plan to become B2C? What does the standard industry industry jargon "fractal, dot-com, compelling" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. What does the commonly-accepted term "users" really mean? We here at FunCubator have proven we know that it is better to actualize transparently than to redefine interactively. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play, best-of-breed. What does the commonly-accepted term "innovative" really mean? The media sourcing factor is interactive. Think co-branded. Think customer-defined. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the capacity of user interfaces to leverage. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Without performance, you will lack Total Quality Management metrics. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. The TQM factor is frictionless. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our mega-resource-constrained C2C but our capacity to enable. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? We have come to know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to mesh strategically.