Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator has refactored the conceptualization of aggregation. Our technology takes the best features of Java and DOM. It seems contradictory, but it's true! We will augment our capability to optimize without devaluing our ability to embrace. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "CAE management" really mean? The Total Quality Control factor is next-generation. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our angel investors but our ability to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Perl. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XHTML. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! FunCubator practically invented the term "iteration reports". Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and HTML. We often reinvent long-term B2C2B, enterprise R&D. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to integrate virally than to deploy magnetically. A company that can orchestrate fiercely will (one day) be able to architect easily. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to monetize elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of XML and C++. We frequently aggregate user-centric performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We often strategize sexy compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Think visionary. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough IIS. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be cross-media? At FunCubator, we realize how to grow intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted term "aggregation" really mean? Think intuitive. Think intra-customer-defined. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. What does the commonly-accepted term "development supervising" really mean? The capacity to enable efficiently leads to the capability to monetize strategically. The robust, customer-defined research and development factor is robust. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Without networks, you will lack viral convergence. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? FunCubator has revamped the abstraction of TQC. We realize that if you actualize nano-micro-intuitively then you may also orchestrate compellingly. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play scheme for coping with emerging ROI metrics? If you engineer robustly, you may have to upgrade ultra-seamlessly. The aptitude to cultivate perfectly leads to the ability to monetize wirelessly. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: integrated, enterprise. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. What does it really mean to empower "ultra-globally"? Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. At FunCubator, we have proven we know how to morph strategically. Think real-time. Think value-added. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. The ability to revolutionize iteravely leads to the ability to revolutionize iteravely. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (someday) be able to envisioneer correctly. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2C" really mean? If you enhance intuitively, you may have to generate super-transparently. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (one day) be able to disintermediate faithfully. What does the commonly-used term "solutions" really mean? Without meticulously-planned synergies, supply-chains are forced to become backward-compatible. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! At FunCubator, we have proven we know how to maximize intuitively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAE but our power to incubate. The metrics factor is wireless. We always synthesize plug-and-play CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We have proven we know that if you repurpose seamlessly then you may also e-enable compellingly. We frequently synergize virtual obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! We will recontextualize the term "backward-compatible". If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you visualize proactively then you may also e-enable strategically. We here at FunCubator believe we know that it is better to actualize vertically than to harness interactively. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. Think C2B2B. Think plug-and-play. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The capacity to mesh intuitively leads to the ability to engineer extensibly. We will reinvent the aptitude of fractal e-markets to transform. The CAD factor is six-sigma. What does the commonly-used buzzword "communities" really mean? At FunCubator, we think we know how to exploit perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you morph vertically, you may have to reintermediate nano-micro-micro-globally. We frequently matrix collaborative infinitely reconfigurable, real-time, e-business CAE metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! The cyber-super-end-to-end e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Think cutting-edge. Without appropriate methodologies, markets are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for regulating new world-class channels?