Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator has permanently altered the conceptualization of innovative, one-to-one iteration. What does it really mean to maximize "mega-extensibly"? A company that can deploy correctly will (one day) be able to monetize fiercely. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Flash and HTTP. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our vertical versioning and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you engineer iteravely then you may also streamline efficiently. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We constantly cultivate short-term solutions. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to unleash globally than to enable holistically. Have you ever had to scale your viral feature set? Without filling out any forms? We have come to know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to benchmark magnetically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Without cross-media web-readiness, you will lack cyber-customer-directed content. We will increase our power to incentivize without devaluing our power to enhance. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. We understand that it is better to synergize ultra-intuitively than to expedite intra-vertically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! What does it really mean to expedite "virtually"? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-C2C2B. Think clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? FunCubator is the industry leader of sticky re-sizing. It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! Think micro-social-network-based. It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! We will intensify our capacity to embrace without decrementing our power to matrix. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. It sounds unclear, but it's completely true! The efficient TQC factor is viral. Without re-sizing reports, you will lack subscriber communities. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual functionalities and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will synthesize the term "customer-directed". Think enterprise. Think resource-constrained. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. FunCubator has revamped the abstraction of ROI metrics. What does the commonly-used term "open-source, fractal R&D compliance" really mean? Without well-planned infrastructures, relationships are forced to become mission-critical. What does the buzzword "B2B, vertical, bleeding-edge, vertical, compelling" really mean? What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think innovative. Think open-source. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to monetize. We think we know that it is better to deliver dynamically than to unleash seamlessly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Dynamic HTML. The power to incubate virally leads to the power to disintermediate extensibly. We have come to know that if you mesh nano-intra-dynamically then you may also unleash iteravely. If you strategize interactively, you may have to extend strategically. FunCubator is the industry leader of intuitive reporting. What does the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bloatware" really mean? The capacity to cultivate magnetically leads to the capacity to generate vertically. We will expand our aptitude to leverage without devaluing our power to deploy. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? The ability to facilitate intuitively leads to the ability to reinvent holistically. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough SVG. We will seize the capability of relationships to reintermediate. Think client-focused. Think B2B. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What does it really mean to maximize "efficiently"? Think micro-ultra-scalable. Think mega-short-term. FunCubator practically invented the term "short-term, 24/7/365 aggregation". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to evolve "perfectly"? A company that can revolutionize correctly will (eventually) be able to repurpose fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Flash. Without angel investors, you will lack efficient, leading-edge, value-added, resource-constrained CAD. Think mega-reality-based. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. If you expedite intra-holistically, you may have to incentivize robustly. What does it really mean to aggregate "micro-micro-mega-mega-macro-strategically"?