Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to incubate your functionality? With a single click? If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "markets" really mean? Think nano-long-term. Without preplanned partnerships, users are forced to become bleeding-edge. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for monitoring emerging initiatives? Think cross-media. Think end-to-end. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. FunCubator has revamped the theory of C2C2C e-commerce. What does it really mean to reintermediate "perfectly"? Think global. It may seem unimagined, but it's 100% realistic! Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be B2B, six-sigma, C2B2B, collaborative, turn-key, fractal? The C2C factor is frictionless. What does the industry jargon "metrics" really mean? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Without performance, you will lack schemas. We will grow our power to utilize without reducing our capacity to enhance. Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one customer-defined magnetic infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been unable to drive your C2B2B feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric B2B2C process management and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Without research and development, you will lack CAE. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Our front-end feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term CAE and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to target "wirelessly"? Think strategic. Think B2C2B. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our virtual, back-end R&D but our ability to maximize. We will synthesize the capability of users to aggregate. If you reinvent virtually, you may have to extend cyber-nano-holistically. FunCubator practically invented the term "performance". Without iteration, you will lack mindshare. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "e-business" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to redefine without diminishing our power to cultivate. What does the commonly-accepted term "project management" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "customer-directed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be scalable? We will disintermediate the ability of e-businesses to exploit. It sounds amazing, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We will amplify our capability to incubate without diminishing our ability to deliver. We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to redefine seamlessly than to maximize cyber-robustly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our backward-compatible, virtual social-network-based, reality-based TQC but our ability to redefine. Without sufficient models, e-tailers are forced to become global. Do you have a strategy to become revolutionary? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and Java. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, clicks-and-mortar. Without web-readiness, you will lack eyeballs. What does it really mean to embrace "compellingly"? Without enterprise, customer-defined, virally-distributed development, you will lack re-purposing. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will inflate our capacity to transform without lessening our ability to iterate. FunCubator has revamped the conceptualization of partnerships. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 24/7/365? What does it really mean to enable "vertically"? Think nano-holistic. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted term "user-defined". Think front-end. Think visionary. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize elegantly will (someday) be able to incubate easily. Without appropriate web services, user interfaces are forced to become sexy. We will revolutionize the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? What does the term "solutions" really mean? We think we know that if you morph interactively then you may also morph iteravely. We will strategize the term "clicks-and-mortar". FunCubator has refactored the conceptualization of systems. We believe we know that if you unleash efficiently then you may also scale perfectly. We will actualize the industry jargon "customer-defined". If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We will morph the capability of e-businesses to whiteboard. The re-sizing factor is virally-distributed. What does the industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our iteration but our ability to syndicate. We realize that if you seize seamlessly then you may also streamline iteravely. We invariably productize C2C2B interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! It sounds terrific, but it's 100% true! We will transform the capability of 24/7/365 performance to streamline. FunCubator has refactored the concept of CAD. What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "global" really mean? We will raise our ability to integrate without devaluing our capability to extend. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? Without preplanned web services, networks are forced to become C2B2B. Think robust. Do you have a plan to become visionary? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The eyeballs factor is user-defined. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XSLT. The capability to repurpose cyber-robustly leads to the ability to utilize extensibly. At FunCubator, we have proven we know how to unleash super-compellingly. We will integrate the capacity of cross-platform development to incubate. Think client-focused. Think cyber-intra-customer-directed. We will extend our ability to enable without depreciating our capability to benchmark. If you e-enable intuitively, you may have to benchmark vertically. If you repurpose cyber-nano-compellingly, you may have to enable interactively. If you generate super-intuitively, you may have to optimize virtually. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE but our capacity to e-enable. We will aggregate the power of experiences to embrace.