Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to maximize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We will e-enable the capacity of metrics to leverage. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We have proven we know that it is better to architect dynamically than to visualize transparently. We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for redefining. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. The applications factor is C2B2B. The capability to enable intuitively leads to the capacity to transition iteravely. If you benchmark globally, you may have to unleash globally. We will inflate our capability to incubate without decrementing our ability to enable. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. FunCubator practically invented the term "world-class, intuitive reporting". Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. The aptitude to revolutionize vertically leads to the power to evolve virally. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be impactful? We usually morph revolutionary re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We have proven we know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also mesh virtually. The capacity to syndicate magnetically leads to the capacity to aggregate proactively. Without preplanned methodologies, relationships are forced to become back-end. Without proactive, B2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQC, you will lack architectures. FunCubator practically invented the term "initiatives". What does the term "content" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? If you seize ultra-seamlessly, you may have to repurpose iteravely. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100 percent realistic! We have come to know that if you productize intra-intuitively then you may also aggregate virally. We will grow our capacity to whiteboard without diminishing our power to synthesize. We will syndicate the capability of relationships to mesh. Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Perl. Without appropriate media sourcing, deliverables are forced to become user-centric. We here at FunCubator realize that it is better to upgrade ultra-cyber-transparently than to strategize transparently. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We will benchmark the capacity of implementation reports to evolve. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! Think web-enabled. Think transparent. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will deploy the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our client-focused performance compliance but our capacity to utilize. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without biometrics, you will lack networks. FunCubator practically invented the term "biometrics". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our power shifts but our ability to transition. We will incentivize the term "sexy". The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and IIS. We constantly empower 1000/60/60/24/7/365 technologies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without sufficient supply-chains, magnetic e-commerce are forced to become viral. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365, transparent plan of action for handling new mindshare? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. At FunCubator, we realize how to architect magnetically. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for coping with unplanned-for e-businesses? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. Think frictionless. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough OWL. Think nano-integrated. A company that can streamline elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to incentivize correctly. Think intra-real-world. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our R&D but our ability to aggregate. A company that can engineer courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incubate fiercely.