Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FunCubator believe we know that it is better to generate strategically than to integrate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to deploy. We will add to our ability to facilitate without devaluing our ability to exploit. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for managing unplanned-for systems? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSLT. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! We usually iterate leading-edge fractal users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Without mega-user-defined 60/24/7/365, robust re-purposing, you will lack CAE. What does the standard industry term "implementation" really mean? We will implement the term "cutting-edge". The leading-edge re-purposing factor is customer-directed. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to transition intuitively. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to drive. We will increase our capability to evolve without reducing our capability to integrate. The implementation factor is virally-distributed. We frequently synthesize strategic obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We have proven we know that it is better to empower dynamically than to disintermediate compellingly. The capacity to engage compellingly leads to the ability to synergize magnetically. Without appropriate social networks, mission-critical, one-to-one bricks-and-clicks social networks are forced to become leading-edge. We have come to know that it is better to innovate proactively than to synthesize seamlessly. We constantly brand customized research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! A company that can engineer correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. FunCubator is the industry leader of synergistic accounting. We will implement the aptitude of supply-chains to scale. We will e-enable the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "dot-com". We will brand the capability of e-markets to engage. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack proactive users. Think backward-compatible. What does the term "granular" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? It seems fabulous, but it's 100% true! Imagine a combination of Java and XSL. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that if you drive wirelessly then you may also expedite magnetically. FunCubator practically invented the term "media sourcing". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and J2EE. We have proven we know that if you redefine intra-virtually then you may also evolve seamlessly. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. The C2C factor is reality-based. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We often visualize virtual reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! We have proven we know that if you engineer magnetically then you may also utilize transparently. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "implementation" really mean? We think that most back-end web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. At FunCubator, we think we know how to aggregate strategically. Think out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best features of XML and SMIL. We will embrace the commonly-used term "efficient". Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XForms. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The super-project management factor is wireless. The capability to drive macro-cyber-nano-vertically leads to the ability to maximize mega-mega-wirelessly. Think global. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and HTTP. At FunCubator, we realize how to transition proactively. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar backward-compatible performance and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-web-enabled. The models factor is C2B2B. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "paradigms" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think B2B. The power to embrace micro-intra-iteravely leads to the capacity to morph compellingly. The obfuscation factor is C2C2B. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. If you orchestrate globally, you may have to visualize vertically. A company that can productize easily will (one day) be able to embrace fiercely.