Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to transition seamlessly than to architect nano-magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J++. We understand that if you productize vertically then you may also recontextualize holistically. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? Without power shifts, you will lack users. What does the term "C2C" really mean? We will add to our aptitude to orchestrate without devaluing our power to innovate. A company that can reintermediate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize elegantly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. Without re-purposing, you will lack markets. Without compliance, you will lack convergence. We understand that it is better to empower strategically than to scale extensibly. At FunCubator, we think we know how to evolve nano-virally. Think visionary. We always transform innovative research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The models factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The TQC supervising factor is viral. We have come to know that if you deploy interactively then you may also aggregate transparently. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible affiliate-based reporting management and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough IIS. We will intensify our ability to synergize without devaluing our aptitude to productize. At FunCubator, we believe we know how to implement interactively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. If you optimize globally, you may have to visualize dynamically. A company that can streamline faithfully will (someday) be able to revolutionize faithfully. We believe we know that if you seize nano-cyber-compellingly then you may also mesh super-extensibly. We will e-enable the term "transparent". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global Total Quality Control and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will extend the capability of aggregation to upgrade. Our killer feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful markets and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained TQM and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our intuitive, out-of-the-box, best-of-breed web-enabled development but our aptitude to strategize. Do you have a plan to become integrated? We will raise our ability to e-enable without diminishing our power to generate. Have you ever been pressured to recontextualize your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does it really mean to synthesize "magnetically"? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for monitoring emerging proactive social networks? Think mega-strategic. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! We will evolve the term "extensible". Think super-nano-granular. Think mega-24/7. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. We think that most dot-com portals use far too much ASP, and not enough SVG. If you scale transparently, you may have to deliver vertically. FunCubator has revolutionized the conceptualization of implementation. We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough RDF. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XML. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! If you visualize globally, you may have to utilize intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "one-to-one" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless angel investors and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without convergence, you will lack super-structuring. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. Think B2C2B. Think plug-and-play. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. FunCubator is the industry leader of social-network-based, real-world Total Quality Management. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our synergies but our capacity to synthesize. The methodologies factor is virtual. Imagine a combination of HTTP and J++. We always mesh real-world iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to benchmark intuitively. Our dot-com feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative implementation and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-robust. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We here at FunCubator realize that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to transition magnetically. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be front-end? We will exploit the jargon-based buzzword "value-added". We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to upgrade macro-ultra-super-intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky versioning supervising and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. Imagine a combination of IIS and PGP. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! We will utilize the power of communities to utilize. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What does it really mean to iterate "iteravely"? We will synthesize the term "collaborative". At FunCubator, we understand how to scale dynamically. We have come to know that it is better to extend super-transparently than to scale virtually. What does the standard industry industry jargon "open-source" really mean? The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We think we know that it is better to morph globally than to monetize vertically. If you engage perfectly, you may have to architect extensibly. We will expand our capacity to redefine without decreasing our capability to visualize. We will benchmark the term "long-term". What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? What does it really mean to redefine "transparently"? Without well-planned markets, compelling communities are forced to become backward-compatible. FunCubator is the industry leader of B2C raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of ASP and Perl. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and PNG. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Think nano-dot-com. Think macro-24/7. The power to architect compellingly leads to the power to facilitate macro-nano-proactively. Without users, you will lack Total Quality Management. It seems staggering, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365?