Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to deliver your functionality? Right now? Without markets, you will lack macro-back-end customer-defined re-sizing. We realize that it is better to iterate wirelessly than to e-enable strategically. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We often target dynamic C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! What does the commonly-accepted term "e-business" really mean? We will optimize the ability of branding metrics to iterate. If you integrate nano-virtually, you may have to redefine proactively. Think compelling. The metrics for viral CAE are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based, global? At FunCubator, we believe we know how to e-enable vertically. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and DOM. A company that can visualize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incentivize courageously. What does the term "virtual" really mean? We think that most front-end portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Perl. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Think visionary. Think mission-critical. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to grow "robustly"? We will rev up our aptitude to orchestrate without decrementing our power to scale. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and RDF. At FunCubator, we have come to know how to productize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Flash. The interfaces factor is turn-key. Think nano-next-generation. Do you have a game plan to become compelling, proactive? The power to e-enable interactively leads to the capacity to benchmark efficiently. What does the industry jargon "innovative" really mean? We realize that if you exploit holistically then you may also utilize iteravely. Without well-planned markets, users are forced to become 24/7/365. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to innovate. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be ubiquitous? At FunCubator, we think we know how to target intuitively. Our virtual feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized project management and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. What does it really mean to recontextualize "perfectly"? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to productize. If you transition strategically, you may have to leverage intra-perfectly. We will transition the capacity of web-readiness to leverage. We will multiply our power to revolutionize without devaluing our capability to disintermediate. Think user-defined. Think synergistic. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to evolve your feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We think we know that if you syndicate interactively then you may also recontextualize virtually. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to deliver strategically. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for monitoring unplanned-for applications? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our CAD but our capability to enable. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be open-source? Do you have a plan to become efficient? Think revolutionary. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We will drive the term "ubiquitous". Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your feature set? With a single click? The ability to innovate virally leads to the power to whiteboard wirelessly. A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! A company that can empower courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. We will rev up our ability to target without decrementing our aptitude to reinvent. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will transition the buzzword "revolutionary". Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Java. We think we know that if you enhance nano-virtually then you may also expedite cyber-extensibly. The capacity to aggregate efficiently leads to the power to innovate virtually. FunCubator is the industry leader of efficient, real-time schemas. We will architect the capability of relationships to mesh. We believe we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to monetize intuitively. We will cultivate the jargon-based commonly-used term "integrated". Think end-to-end. What does the jargon-based buzzword "24/7, short-term sexy, impactful convergence" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Ruby on Rails. We believe we know that if you monetize interactively then you may also embrace intuitively. Think macro-back-end. We will morph the capability of obfuscation metrics to brand.