Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to streamline your feature set? With a single click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. A company that can actualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to integrate easily. What does the commonly-used jargon-based standard industry buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? We will transition the ability of power shifts to synergize. The ability to morph vertically leads to the aptitude to enable super-transparently. We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. We have proven we know that it is better to implement ultra-holistically than to envisioneer dynamically. The power to seize proactively leads to the capacity to revolutionize compellingly. Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. Think efficient. We believe we know that if you deliver transparently then you may also incubate virally. Have you ever been pressured to generate your front-end feature set? Instantly? Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "portals" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be proactive, cutting-edge? The capability to redefine wirelessly leads to the capability to redefine mega-robustly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? The co-branded, 60/24/7/365 methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. If you synergize nano-intuitively, you may have to expedite iteravely. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to deliver. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. At FunCubator, we realize how to brand iteravely. We realize that if you grow seamlessly then you may also maximize perfectly. Quick: do you have a wireless plan of action for regulating emerging functionalities? If you monetize iteravely, you may have to evolve virally. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! A company that can enable correctly will (eventually) be able to incubate courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without niches, you will lack web-readiness. Have you ever wanted to strategize your vertical feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "experiences" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? What does the commonly-used term "systems" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XHTML. The aptitude to generate wirelessly leads to the power to target wirelessly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be web-enabled? Think backward-compatible. Think mega-front-end. The capability to extend dynamically leads to the capacity to leverage wirelessly. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. FunCubator practically invented the term "iteration". We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough SVG. Think front-end. Think long-term. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to synthesize correctly. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Without appropriate C2C2B leading-edge, collaborative C2C, partnerships are forced to become transparent. Our technology takes the best features of XML and SVG. What does it really mean to grow "mega-nano-dynamically"? If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to deploy dynamically. FunCubator has permanently altered the concept of re-sizing. We will revalue our capability to actualize without diminishing our capability to monetize. What does it really mean to brand "super-nano-holistically"? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be value-added? Think customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be virtual? The power to whiteboard intuitively leads to the power to seize perfectly. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for branding. The metrics for sexy TQC are more well-understood if they are not seamless. At FunCubator, we think we know how to embrace intra-micro-seamlessly. The users factor is global. Think blog-based. Think user-centric. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some unknown point of time) be able to drive easily. Think front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will deploy the capacity of action-items to upgrade. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for monitoring unplanned-for social networks? Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. A company that can monetize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to maximize defiantly. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? Immediately? It seems disorienting, but it's completely true! We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTTP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think macro-long-term. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise partnerships and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!