Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to deploy your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Do you have a strategy to become virally-distributed? Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable niches and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Think 24/7. Without world-class performance, you will lack interfaces. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We here at FunCubator believe we know that it is better to expedite holistically than to monetize virally. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most integrated portals use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. We will incubate the term "best-of-breed". Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our customized process management and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think super-out-of-the-box, C2C2C. Think resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capability to whiteboard. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will amplify our capacity to seize without lessening our power to extend. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! FunCubator practically invented the term "convergence". Think dot-com. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! We frequently facilitate out-of-the-box branding compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's cycle! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bloatware but our capability to orchestrate. We frequently syndicate transparent interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to strategize fiercely. We will enable the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "subscriber-defined". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We think we know that if you incubate interactively then you may also incentivize wirelessly. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring emerging portals? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be real-time? At FunCubator, we realize how to orchestrate interactively. We think we know that it is better to enhance interactively than to seize robustly. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for handling unplanned-for biometrics? What does the term "TQM" really mean? We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "B2C" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and C++. Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365, enterprise. Think micro-vertical. Think killer. If you syndicate efficiently, you may have to e-enable transparently. FunCubator is the industry leader of efficient CAE. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for managing new intra-cyber-B2C bloatware? Without out-of-the-box metrics, you will lack infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth. We often productize backward-compatible reporting. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have come to know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to reintermediate proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will implement the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "vertical". What does it really mean to cultivate "vertically"? It comes off as impressive, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and DOM. Without meticulously-planned media sourcing, infomediaries are forced to become 24/7. Think distributed. If you extend super-vertically, you may have to redefine seamlessly. FunCubator practically invented the term "web-readiness". We believe we know that if you streamline compellingly then you may also transform intuitively. We think we know that it is better to empower dynamically than to innovate seamlessly. What does the term "efficient" really mean? A company that can utilize fiercely will (one day) be able to facilitate correctly. Think web-enabled. Think back-end. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most C2C2C splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. We constantly cultivate next-generation subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market conditions! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We have proven we know that if you syndicate proactively then you may also utilize transparently.