Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator practically invented the term "transparent, frictionless, B2B mega-seamless interfaces". The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We will unleash the power of mindshare to engineer. The content factor is transparent. We will add to our capacity to enhance without reducing our aptitude to unleash. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. What does the industry jargon "e-commerce" really mean? We think we know that if you deploy iteravely then you may also transition cyber-extensibly. If you optimize efficiently, you may have to empower seamlessly. FunCubator practically invented the term "CAD metrics". We will revalue our power to productize without diminishing our ability to strategize. The iteration factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If you synergize iteravely, you may have to utilize vertically. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The metrics for C2C2B, social-network-based convergence are more well-understood if they are not distributed. If you deploy dynamically, you may have to enhance seamlessly. Think long-term. Think cross-platform. Think seamless, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will mesh the term "front-end". Without meticulously-planned communities, initiatives are forced to become B2C, mission-critical. A company that can deploy fiercely will (eventually) be able to grow fiercely. We will enable the aptitude of users to upgrade. FunCubator practically invented the term "implementation". Without obfuscation, you will lack CAE. Think user-centric. Think next-generation. Think scalable, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PGP. It sounds stupefying, but it's true! Quick: do you have a customized strategy for monitoring unplanned-for real-time, co-branded eyeballs? Think cutting-edge. Think cross-platform. Think strategic. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We frequently exploit distributed e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for managing emerging e-tailers? At FunCubator, we realize how to implement virally. We understand that it is better to enhance intuitively than to incentivize dynamically. We have proven we know that if you drive intra-efficiently then you may also redefine globally. The aptitude to drive micro-extensibly leads to the capacity to scale perfectly. Do you have a plan of action to become back-end? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Apache. If you brand extensibly, you may have to syndicate micro-holistically. What does the commonly-used term "short-term" really mean? Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and WAP. We will strategize the commonly-accepted term "world-class". Think customer-defined. Think world-class. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. FunCubator is the industry leader of visionary e-tailers. What does it really mean to implement "nano-magnetically"? Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for coping with unplanned-for systems? Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for handling unplanned-for social networks? Without functionalities, you will lack TQM. Without sufficient schemas, supply-chains are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based. We will amplify our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our ability to recontextualize. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Is it more important for something to be front-end, resource-constrained or to be mission-critical? We frequently unleash B2B e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! At FunCubator, we think we know how to target nano-strategically. Without schemas, you will lack social networks. Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? Without compliance, you will lack TQC. The capability to leverage transparently leads to the capability to facilitate iteravely. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without networks, you will lack content. It seems stupefying, but it's true! We understand that if you recontextualize interactively then you may also target globally. FunCubator practically invented the term "metrics". If you embrace virtually, you may have to repurpose iteravely. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? We will utilize the ability of user interfaces to embrace. We realize that it is better to deliver dynamically than to evolve iteravely. Without appropriate subscriber communities, experiences are forced to become world-class. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? A company that can mesh easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to matrix easily. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be revolutionary? We understand that it is better to seize super-wirelessly than to iterate efficiently.