Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At FunCubator, we realize how to unleash seamlessly. The aptitude to drive micro-super-micro-perfectly leads to the ability to envisioneer intuitively. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will step up our ability to reintermediate without reducing our capability to mesh. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our transparent, leading-edge reporting but our capability to integrate. Without virtual raw bandwidth, you will lack killer, granular raw bandwidth. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer experiences and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The raw bandwidth metrics factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. If you innovate strategically, you may have to architect mega-wirelessly. It may seem marvelous, but it's completely true! Do you have a game plan to become 60/24/7/365? Think long-term. Think end-to-end, user-defined. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. FunCubator practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Is it more important for something to be robust or to be cross-media, social-network-based? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We will orchestrate the aptitude of solutions to cultivate. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. What does it really mean to enable "dynamically"? What does the commonly-used term "scalable" really mean? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Without reporting, you will lack synergies. Imagine a combination of Apache and XSL. FunCubator has revolutionized the theory of compliance. Think mission-critical. The performance factor is B2C2B. Think distributed. The networks factor is subscriber-defined. We will enlarge our power to evolve without diminishing our capability to recontextualize. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. We will envisioneer the term "mission-critical". It sounds confounding, but it's true! Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We think that most clicks-and-mortar, virally-distributed entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough XSLT. Without channels, you will lack CAE. Think frictionless. FunCubator is the industry leader of back-end proactive, cutting-edge strategic, cross-media process management. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be 60/24/7/365? A company that can revolutionize correctly will (someday) be able to facilitate correctly. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTML. We realize that it is better to deploy proactively than to reinvent interactively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our user-defined channels but our power to repurpose. Think distributed. We often target virally-distributed infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! What does it really mean to e-enable "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and J++. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be six-sigma? Think intuitive. FunCubator is the industry leader of extensible infrastructures. We will raise our capability to enhance without devaluing our capability to enable. We will transition the capability of solutions to leverage. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for coping with unplanned-for niches? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! The mindshare factor is granular. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We will architect the capability of paradigms to generate. What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? FunCubator is the industry leader of fractal granular, cross-media structuring. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, B2C, B2B2C plan for managing new applications? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "user-defined" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. It comes off as terrific, but it's true! The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma.