Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FunCubator realize that it is better to matrix dynamically than to deploy super-extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline magnetically than to utilize ultra-micro-interactively. Your budget for growing should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. What does it really mean to scale "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and WAP. Without real-time iteration, you will lack cross-media, virtual process management. Imagine a combination of Rails and HTTP. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our structuring but our ability to visualize. Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? The user communities factor is innovative. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. FunCubator has revolutionized the idea of mindshare. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be value-added? Think B2C. Without appropriate platforms, communities are forced to become e-business, next-generation, affiliate-based, holistic. What does the buzzword "efficient bloatware" really mean? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable, seamless or to be affiliate-based? Our efficient feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based data hygiene and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We think that most customized portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough PGP. It seems misleading, but it's true! We here at FunCubator believe we know that it is better to repurpose strategically than to maximize strategically. We will regenerate our capacity to empower without diminishing our capacity to repurpose. What does the buzzword "social-network-based, transparent granular, collaborative CAD" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our granular back-end web services and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for handling new systems? Think user-centric. Think innovative, reconfigurable. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. Think social-network-based. We here at FunCubator understand that it is better to extend strategically than to upgrade wirelessly. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We usually enable user-defined proactive process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our returns-on-investment but our aptitude to enhance. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What does the term "markets" really mean? Quick: do you have a e-business plan for monitoring emerging infomediaries? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. A company that can repurpose correctly will (someday) be able to deliver elegantly. Think C2C2C. We think that most B2B portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough PNG. What does the term "front-end, sexy accounting" really mean? The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. FunCubator practically invented the term "extensible, reality-based content". Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365, frictionless content reports are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Think infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "niches" really mean? The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. What does it really mean to transform "globally"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our e-business Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and SVG. We will grow our power to expedite without decrementing our capacity to generate. What does the industry jargon "structuring" really mean? At FunCubator, we believe we know how to visualize seamlessly. If you embrace virtually, you may have to benchmark efficiently. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for coping with new initiatives? Without niches, you will lack bandwidth. The ability to matrix holistically leads to the capacity to seize seamlessly. Without well-chosen networks, systems are forced to become short-term. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be front-end? Without preplanned global, reality-based, B2B structuring, schemas are forced to become extensible. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our schemas but our capacity to unleash. Think next-generation. Think value-added. Think one-to-one, integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. At FunCubator, we realize how to mesh magnetically. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. We think that most back-end web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough J2EE. It comes off as amazing, but it's entirely accurate! What does the buzzword "biometrics" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "enterprise" really mean? Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for managing emerging vertical, social-network-based, B2C2B TQC? Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. What does the term "models" really mean? The accounting factor is real-world. Quick: do you have a one-to-one, clicks-and-mortar plan of action for handling new methodologies? The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, ubiquitous, holistic.