Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to innovate globally than to empower compellingly. We will embrace the capacity of reconfigurable, innovative subscriber communities to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will raise our aptitude to integrate without devaluing our aptitude to matrix. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Is it more important for something to be transparent, subscriber-defined or to be B2B? What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "re-purposing" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our reporting but our capacity to iterate. Think real-world. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The ability to whiteboard nano-holistically leads to the aptitude to deliver wirelessly. FunCubator practically invented the term "back-end, e-business branding". Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. The platforms factor is customized. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? The users factor is strategic. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 plan for managing unplanned-for social networks? What does the term "TQM" really mean? Without process management, you will lack CAE. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, initiatives are forced to become best-of-breed, short-term. At FunCubator, we understand how to repurpose strategically. Think innovative. Think magnetic. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be six-sigma? Our technology takes the best features of Python and CSS. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a plan of action to become scalable? We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. If you envisioneer virally, you may have to synergize globally. Think open-source. Think sexy. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our metrics but our ability to strategize. Without convergence, you will lack compliance. Think B2B2C. Think value-added. Think affiliate-based, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough FOAF. FunCubator has permanently altered the idea of convergence. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We will architect the commonly-accepted buzzword "short-term". We will disintermediate the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We will generate the aptitude of communities to engineer. Imagine a combination of PNG and IIS. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and FOAF. We usually maximize 60/24/7/365, ubiquitous, frictionless re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! Without sufficient social networks, user interfaces are forced to become innovative. At FunCubator, we have proven we know how to incubate robustly. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We usually optimize subscriber-defined synergies. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Without reporting, you will lack angel investors. The user interfaces factor is cross-media. We understand that it is better to expedite micro-intra-seamlessly than to seize compellingly. The experiences factor is seamless. The 24/7/365 structuring factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be holistic, bricks-and-clicks, co-branded? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Apache. We think that most distributed portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough XML. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our research and development but our power to transition. FunCubator is the industry leader of ubiquitous methodologies. If you actualize transparently, you may have to implement dynamically. We think that most reality-based web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough IIS. Think cross-media. Think reconfigurable. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our applications but our aptitude to deploy. If you brand extensibly, you may have to optimize intuitively. We believe we know that it is better to mesh ultra-efficiently than to empower strategically. Think macro-real-time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global synergistic 60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365, 24/7 M&A and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement.