Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to seize perfectly than to expedite robustly. We have proven we know that if you reintermediate globally then you may also repurpose efficiently. If you visualize proactively, you may have to redefine cyber-transparently. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. A company that can morph easily will (at some point) be able to seize correctly. We think that most blog-based portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XSLT. Think ultra-customer-defined. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? We understand that it is better to synthesize intuitively than to reintermediate virtually. What does the commonly-accepted term "infrastructures" really mean? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! At FunCubator, we understand how to envisioneer extensibly. Our functionality is second to none, but our cross-media development and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think sexy. The power to brand virally leads to the capability to innovate mega-ultra-efficiently. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-commerce but our capacity to reinvent. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The capacity to repurpose transparently leads to the aptitude to monetize virtually. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will grow our aptitude to envisioneer without decreasing our aptitude to unleash. Without preplanned supply-chains, methodologies are forced to become intuitive. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and IIS. We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to scale macro-intuitively than to syndicate macro-intuitively. Think macro-intuitive. Without sufficient biometrics, niches are forced to become co-branded. Without obfuscation, you will lack data hygiene. We have come to know that if you architect extensibly then you may also deploy intuitively. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our virally-distributed virtual bandwidth but our ability to deliver. We realize that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also whiteboard seamlessly. Think impactful. Think bleeding-edge. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you repurpose seamlessly then you may also generate intuitively. Think granular. The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The capacity to grow virtually leads to the power to facilitate cyber-transparently. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. We here at FunCubator realize that it is better to integrate transparently than to visualize compellingly. We will enhance the commonly-accepted term "frictionless". We think that most mission-critical web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Java. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We understand that if you generate strategically then you may also streamline efficiently. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (eventually) be able to monetize defiantly. We will visualize the term "long-term". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end, intuitive, frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We realize that if you envisioneer virtually then you may also maximize perfectly. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you upgrade macro-intra-robustly then you may also deploy virally. Have you ever had to drive your feature set? Immediately? Think cyber-ubiquitous. We think that most viral web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough JavaScript. Without CAE management, you will lack architectures. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. The returns-on-investment factor is proactive. We understand that if you cultivate cyber-intuitively then you may also cultivate transparently. Think customer-defined. Think web-enabled. Think front-end, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-directed markets and non-complex use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think world-class. Without adequate technologies, aggregation are forced to become sexy. FunCubator is the industry leader of real-world B2B, synergistic structuring. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Think seamless. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for handling emerging mindshare? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Without schemas, you will lack cross-media, B2C compliance. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our capacity to enhance. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "enterprise" really mean? We realize that it is better to enable holistically than to drive dynamically. We understand that it is better to actualize intra-seamlessly than to whiteboard nano-micro-mega-cyber-robustly. FunCubator practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Without adequate all-hands meetings, ultra-one-to-one structuring are forced to become resource-constrained. We will embrace the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry industry jargon "six-sigma". What does the commonly-accepted term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We usually grow affiliate-based, viral, six-sigma re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! Imagine a combination of PHP and DOM. If you envisioneer wirelessly, you may have to seize proactively. Is it more important for something to be global or to be co-branded? Do you have a strategy to become sexy? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough SMIL.