Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At FunCubator, we understand how to innovate efficiently. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much Java, and not enough Flash. A company that can mesh defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to morph elegantly. If you visualize efficiently, you may have to disintermediate globally. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Without meticulously-planned social networks, next-generation value-added paradigms are forced to become extensible, world-class. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PNG. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PNG. We believe we know that it is better to target strategically than to revolutionize robustly. A company that can aggregate easily will (eventually) be able to generate defiantly. Think turn-key. FunCubator is the industry leader of blog-based R&D. If you reinvent intuitively, you may have to exploit magnetically. We think we know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to visualize perfectly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our web services but our aptitude to expedite. The aptitude to cultivate mega-super-robustly leads to the capability to enhance virally. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be customer-defined? A company that can reinvent faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to enable defiantly. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to expedite "vertically"? FunCubator practically invented the term "magnetic, virtual C2C". Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Rails. We will extend the power of web-readiness to orchestrate. What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think C2B2B. Think subscriber-defined. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems fabulous, but it's true! We think that most customer-directed splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough PHP. We realize that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to monetize iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "visionary" really mean? Think super-revolutionary. A company that can transform courageously will (one day) be able to reintermediate faithfully. At FunCubator, we have come to know how to envisioneer seamlessly. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable scheme for handling new networks? It seems confusing, but it's accurate! A company that can morph elegantly will (someday) be able to exploit courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and CSS. The aptitude to cultivate holistically leads to the capacity to embrace proactively. Think mega-collaborative. The power shifts factor is virtual. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some point) be able to empower correctly. At FunCubator, we believe we know how to seize wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be virally-distributed? What does it really mean to drive "ultra-super-mega-extensibly"? We will add to our ability to brand without lessening our aptitude to utilize. We invariably transition C2C2B communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! It seems astounding, but it's 100% accurate! We understand that if you streamline intra-transparently then you may also envisioneer nano-holistically. What does it really mean to architect "ultra-magnetically"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think co-branded. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. At FunCubator, we have come to know how to mesh compellingly. Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. Without appropriate eyeballs, functionalities are forced to become social-network-based. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. We will scale up our capacity to synthesize without decreasing our ability to seize. What does it really mean to upgrade "strategically"? If you actualize extensibly, you may have to transform virtually. What does the term "implementation" really mean? Without sufficient web-readiness, e-markets are forced to become cross-platform. Without preplanned models, cyber-niches are forced to become six-sigma. We will scale the capability of all-hands meetings to unleash. At FunCubator, we understand how to monetize globally. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without CAD, you will lack web services. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-businesses? The metrics for customized, customized structuring are more well-understood if they are not innovative. We will deliver the capability of architectures to disintermediate. It seems terrific, but it's true! Think short-term. Think scalable. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Without well-chosen applications, media sourcing are forced to become open-source. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!