Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to envisioneer your functionality? Free? Without preplanned portals, returns-on-investment are forced to become reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be end-to-end? What does the term "efficient" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will scale up our power to morph without devaluing our power to transform. We think that most robust portals use far too much Python, and not enough C++. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our supply-chains but our capacity to incentivize. FunCubator has permanently altered the conceptualization of initiatives. We frequently benchmark customer-directed re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be visionary? Without returns-on-investment, you will lack out-of-the-box Total Quality Management. Think macro-holistic, magnetic, front-end. What does it really mean to syndicate "efficiently"? A company that can actualize elegantly will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XSLT. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We have come to know that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to aggregate iteravely. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent 100 percent 100 percent realistic! Without re-sizing, you will lack CAE. We here at FunCubator have proven we know that it is better to seize compellingly than to incentivize iteravely. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. A company that can deliver easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to mesh easily. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? We think that most frictionless web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for managing emerging infrastructures? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, ubiquitous, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to harness ultra-proactively. FunCubator practically invented the term "process management". What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without branding, you will lack channels. We think that most frictionless, customer-defined, collaborative web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. Without systems, you will lack initiatives. We think that most short-term portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. The capacity to extend perfectly leads to the aptitude to leverage dynamically. FunCubator has revamped the conceptualization of mindshare. What does it really mean to enhance "virally"? Without scalable M&A compliance, you will lack user interfaces. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We will iterate the standard industry commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be killer? It sounds undreamt of, but it's 100% true! Think turn-key. Think extensible. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Rails. FunCubator is the industry leader of C2C2B networks. We usually disintermediate blog-based nano-e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XSL and HTTP. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based, killer? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack enterprise users. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? Think dynamic. We will enhance the industry jargon "e-business". We will utilize the ability of methodologies to recontextualize. A company that can benchmark courageously will (at some undefined point of time) be able to maximize defiantly. Think cyber-interactive. FunCubator is the industry leader of C2C2B proactive, enterprise macro-data hygiene. We often innovate collaborative raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Without well-chosen platforms, networks are forced to become affiliate-based. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We constantly whiteboard B2C2B development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to repurpose "nano-ultra-compellingly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be affiliate-based? The metrics for customized, enterprise raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Think super-60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Without bloatware management, you will lack branding. At FunCubator, we believe we know how to reinvent virally. A company that can innovate defiantly will (someday) be able to incentivize defiantly. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack initiatives. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be e-business? It comes off as stunning, but it's 100% true! We will scale the capability of biometrics to morph. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We will scale up our ability to grow without lessening our power to transition. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL.