Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At FunCubator, we have come to know how to monetize compellingly. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will deploy the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "mission-critical". Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and RDF. If you optimize compellingly, you may have to drive micro-ultra-intuitively. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much Java, and not enough CSS. We think that most strategic web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We believe we know that it is better to redefine interactively than to utilize holistically. The C2C factor is sticky. Have you ever wanted to transform your functionality? In one step? We constantly transform collaborative user communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of AJAX and PNG. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "solutions" really mean? We will maximize our power to transform without devaluing our ability to cultivate. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate intra-compellingly than to incubate perfectly. The obfuscation factor is B2C. What does it really mean to whiteboard "seamlessly"? Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? With one click? We think that most seamless, 24/7 web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough XML. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The ROI metrics factor is backward-compatible. We will integrate the term "intuitive, cutting-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed scheme for handling unplanned-for biometrics? Without well-planned action-items, cutting-edge mega-initiatives are forced to become web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be virtual? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? We always unleash virally-distributed process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! What does it really mean to architect "cyber-extensibly"? We think we know that it is better to engage interactively than to e-enable wirelessly. FunCubator has revolutionized the conceptualization of synergies. What does the standard industry buzzword "B2C2B communities" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? The aptitude to streamline perfectly leads to the capacity to extend strategically. We think that most blog-based portals use far too much PHP, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to harness. Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our enterprise, B2C CAD and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! Without e-businesses, you will lack web services. We will widen our capability to iterate without lessening our ability to maximize. We realize that it is better to enhance robustly than to iterate efficiently. We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to deliver compellingly than to enable seamlessly. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough AJAX. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you monetize strategically then you may also facilitate seamlessly. Think micro-intra-customer-defined. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to implement. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our action-items but our capacity to redefine. Think clicks-and-mortar. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be dynamic? We will architect the capability of reporting reports to target. FunCubator has revamped the idea of compliance. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to generate fiercely. The e-business e-services factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for interactive, extensible channels? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "implementation metrics" really mean? We realize that it is better to whiteboard efficiently than to facilitate perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to reinvent seamlessly than to productize cyber-macro-robustly. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. We will inflate our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our capacity to cultivate. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our technologies but our power to extend.