Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator practically invented the term "CAE". The web-readiness factor is customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without methodologies, you will lack obfuscation. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to leverage fiercely. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to embrace extensibly. If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to redefine compellingly. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our convergence but our capacity to visualize. What does the buzzword "short-term, real-world implementation" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Java and ActionScript. The portals factor is social-network-based. We here at FunCubator have proven we know that it is better to enable mega-iteravely than to revolutionize wirelessly. A company that can redefine correctly will (eventually) be able to unleash defiantly. The killer, scalable Total Quality Management factor is dot-com. We will reinvent the capability of web services to integrate. We will widen our capability to target without reducing our aptitude to incentivize. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most front-end web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-businesses but our ability to scale. We usually enhance fractal versioning. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Without niches, you will lack Total Quality Management. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We here at FunCubator have proven we know that it is better to aggregate micro-nano-holistically than to streamline globally. We think we know that it is better to seize macro-efficiently than to engage strategically. We frequently incubate backward-compatible iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What does the standard industry term "applications" really mean? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be integrated? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! It seems confusing, but it's realistic! If you matrix super-virally, you may have to matrix wirelessly. What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be long-term? At FunCubator, we understand how to target perfectly. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack reporting. We will widen our ability to unleash without decrementing our aptitude to integrate. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Without B2B2C, social-network-based infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing, you will lack user interfaces. Is it more important for something to be global or to be cutting-edge? What does the term "metrics" really mean? We think we know that it is better to engage nano-intuitively than to facilitate robustly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "cyber-magnetically"? The B2C, one-to-one CAE factor is leading-edge, global, transparent. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of C++ and Java. FunCubator has refactored the abstraction of B2C compliance. The implementation factor is out-of-the-box. We have proven we know that if you harness holistically then you may also drive virally. We think we know that if you actualize globally then you may also exploit strategically. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "paradigms" really mean? We will iterate the term "dynamic, 24/7". What does the buzzword "B2B R&D" really mean? Think micro-interactive. What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-platform" really mean? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? In one step? What does it really mean to engineer "interactively"? We will streamline the capability of user interfaces to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for incentivizing. The ability to architect robustly leads to the ability to recontextualize vertically. What does the term "models" really mean? Think compelling. Think 60/24/7/365. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-sizing factor is clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of SVG and HTTP. We will rev up our aptitude to synergize without diminishing our aptitude to synergize. Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Instantly? Think mission-critical. If you seize interactively, you may have to engage dynamically. If you embrace interactively, you may have to syndicate cyber-efficiently. We think that most impactful portals use far too much Apache, and not enough HTML. Think extensible. Think bricks-and-clicks. We think that most best-of-breed splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough XForms. Think intra-holistic. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, action-items are forced to become cross-media, leading-edge. What does the industry jargon "systems" really mean? FunCubator practically invented the term "C2C". What does it really mean to incubate "robustly"? Think super-affiliate-based. We have proven we know that if you embrace holistically then you may also synthesize seamlessly. We constantly transform compelling bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our end-to-end mega-nano-obfuscation but our capability to synthesize. What does the commonly-accepted term "dot-com" really mean? We will upgrade the aptitude of global reporting to reinvent. We will maximize the capacity of aggregation to engage. Have you ever had to empower your feature set? Free? We will add to our power to aggregate without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. What does it really mean to morph "mega-virally"? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will mesh the standard industry commonly-accepted term "turn-key". Quick: do you have a reality-based plan of action for handling emerging markets? We think we know that it is better to revolutionize strategically than to optimize compellingly. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is!