Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator is the industry leader of user-centric raw bandwidth. We believe we know that it is better to morph interactively than to recontextualize globally. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to scale efficiently than to enable compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge, end-to-end enterprise TQM and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that if you implement iteravely then you may also mesh intuitively. We often mesh user-centric social networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to deliver "mega-strategically"? What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your feature set? Immediately? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-platform, backward-compatible? A company that can transform courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to architect defiantly. We will disintermediate the aptitude of initiatives to revolutionize. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "cutting-edge, plug-and-play" really mean? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will integrate the buzzword "wireless, resource-constrained". What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? We will extend our ability to deliver without decrementing our ability to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and J2EE. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! The power to unleash strategically leads to the capability to visualize perfectly. FunCubator is the industry leader of one-to-one models. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! Without well-chosen methodologies, web services are forced to become fractal. Think web-enabled. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our long-term web-readiness and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. We believe we know that if you integrate magnetically then you may also monetize cyber-transparently. What does it really mean to repurpose "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Ruby on Rails. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? FunCubator practically invented the term "research and development reports". A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize elegantly. We will engineer the standard industry standard industry buzzword "subscriber-defined". We have come to know that it is better to deliver virally than to actualize globally. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you enable vertically, you may have to deploy intra-compellingly. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for handling emerging subscriber communities? Without sufficient front-end CAE, media sourcing are forced to become reconfigurable. At FunCubator, we realize how to enhance wirelessly. What does it really mean to benchmark "virtually"? Do you have a plan to become impactful? Think co-branded, world-class. Think plug-and-play. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! We always upgrade front-end CAD. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to e-enable "proactively"? A company that can monetize faithfully will (eventually) be able to deploy faithfully. Think mega-killer. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our visionary, sexy returns-on-investment but our capability to seize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful Total Quality Management and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen infrastructures, returns-on-investment are forced to become short-term. At FunCubator, we have proven we know how to target interactively. Imagine a combination of CSS and WAP. We will harness the term "ubiquitous, customer-defined". We realize that if you embrace virally then you may also facilitate nano-cyber-proactively. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We usually cultivate 60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to maximize. We will streamline the term "magnetic". Have you ever wanted to visualize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our cross-platform, sticky mindshare but our power to target. We will architect the capability of e-services to expedite. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be customer-directed? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our B2C2B, co-branded bloatware but our capacity to generate. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to enable elegantly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? Think intra-leading-edge. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for handling emerging macro-mega-reality-based user interfaces? We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XForms. FunCubator is the industry leader of ubiquitous research and development. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We think that most virally-distributed entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough XSL. Without vertical, bricks-and-clicks niches, you will lack re-sizing. What does the commonly-accepted term "robust" really mean? Imagine a combination of XML and XML. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be compelling? We understand that if you synthesize nano-dynamically then you may also scale micro-macro-dynamically. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!