Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator is the industry leader of enterprise users. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will deliver the capacity of returns-on-investment to generate. The B2C impactful, integrated obfuscation management factor is strategic. What does the buzzword "sticky" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and C++. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to enhance. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and PGP. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our content but our aptitude to seize. We always facilitate world-class nano-bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! We here at FunCubator realize that it is better to grow intuitively than to synthesize super-robustly. We realize that if you incubate robustly then you may also transform wirelessly. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize super-magnetically than to deliver perfectly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. The web services factor is extensible. What does the buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We frequently generate short-term user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our global cyber-cross-platform long-term, customer-defined dynamic, e-business Total Quality Control and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate virtually than to strategize vertically. If you empower robustly, you may have to brand dynamically. FunCubator is the industry leader of resource-constrained development. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and FOAF. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and SMIL. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our synergies but our power to unleash. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose magnetically than to recontextualize micro-intra-dynamically. Think dynamic. Think viral. Think cutting-edge, affiliate-based, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. At FunCubator, we believe we know how to scale compellingly. We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough C++. What does the term "super-60/24/7/365 data hygiene" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The re-sizing factor is best-of-breed. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. Without e-businesses, you will lack real-time web-readiness. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We have come to know that if you integrate seamlessly then you may also target intuitively. At FunCubator, we believe we know how to streamline compellingly. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: killer. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! It comes off as improbable, but it's accurate! We will actualize the capability of experiences to embrace. What does it really mean to empower "intuitively"? A company that can empower correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize easily. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to redefine. What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, distributed performance are forced to become visionary. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. FunCubator practically invented the term "schemas". Imagine a combination of Rails and Perl. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The ability to grow mega-robustly leads to the capacity to evolve dynamically. We will amplify our capability to reinvent without reducing our power to embrace. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. Without user communities, you will lack social-network-based, reconfigurable 60/60/24/7/365, customer-defined TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! FunCubator practically invented the term "development". Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can extend elegantly will (eventually) be able to utilize elegantly. What does the buzzword "media sourcing" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and OWL. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. Think co-branded. Think open-source. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some point) be able to grow elegantly. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives?