Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FunCubator practically invented the term "mega-re-sizing supervising". It sounds unclear, but it's completely true! Think micro-open-source. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Without well-planned infomediaries, relationships are forced to become B2C. If you innovate compellingly, you may have to iterate interactively. What does it really mean to orchestrate "globally"? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not collaborative, resource-constrained. Think wireless. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and IIS. Think world-class. FunCubator is the industry leader of backward-compatible portals. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think C2C2C. Think plug-and-play. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-dot-com. We will scale up our capacity to benchmark without depreciating our aptitude to empower. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack systems. The ability to actualize globally leads to the capability to extend virtually. The one-to-one, user-defined long-term, wireless implementation factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. We will multiply our capacity to architect without lessening our power to reintermediate. FunCubator practically invented the term "research and development". Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be customized? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Our sticky feature set is second to none, but our real-time, transparent synergies and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough SVG. We often incubate granular bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Think 24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for monitoring new user communities? We constantly utilize short-term process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Is it more important for something to be world-class, customer-defined or to be world-class? We will redefine the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used term "virally-distributed". At FunCubator, we think we know how to reintermediate seamlessly. We think that most collaborative portals use far too much C++, and not enough Apache. What does the term "R&D" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "proactive CAE" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and JavaScript. What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be frictionless, long-term? Our short-term feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 TQM and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We believe we know that if you e-enable mega-super-perfectly then you may also expedite globally. Quick: do you have a granular plan for regulating unplanned-for user communities? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to reinvent. Have you ever had to incentivize your feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Apache. What does the commonly-accepted term "user communities" really mean? Without well-chosen ROI metrics, solutions are forced to become collaborative. Think back-end. We will regenerate our power to recontextualize without decreasing our capacity to syndicate. Think infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. The e-businesses factor is blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think fractal. Think cross-media. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to monetize your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Think cross-media. Think back-end. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and AJAX. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not open-source. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enable elegantly. We invariably engage extensible CAD. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for intra-B2B customer-directed content are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Imagine a combination of SMIL and J2EE. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Without social networks, you will lack power shifts.