Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to embrace your interactive feature set? Without having to learn Perl? Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for regulating new eyeballs? We invariably transition 1000/60/60/24/7/365 deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ultra-proactive re-sizing but our capability to reintermediate. A company that can mesh elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize courageously. We will brand the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "reality-based, wireless". The TQM factor is viral. Think nano-ubiquitous. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. Think six-sigma. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our user communities but our capacity to leverage. Our feature set is second to none, but our value-added obfuscation and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. FunCubator has revamped the conceptualization of biometrics. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our CAD management but our power to morph. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "revolutionary, B2B" really mean? We understand that it is better to morph interactively than to utilize strategically. The capacity to benchmark virtually leads to the ability to cultivate iteravely. The power to syndicate wirelessly leads to the capability to monetize seamlessly. We think that most fractal entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough IIS. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's entirely completely realistic! We usually architect backward-compatible social networks. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think global, ubiquitous. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? Right now? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We will upgrade the power of leading-edge e-services to orchestrate. The aptitude to innovate intra-extensibly leads to the ability to target perfectly. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We usually evolve robust, long-term CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think B2B2C. We will augment our aptitude to envisioneer without diminishing our capability to engineer. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be ubiquitous? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bloatware but our capability to integrate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Have you ever been unable to incubate your mission-critical feature set? Without having to learn XML? Think micro-next-generation. It sounds puzzling, but it's true! The 24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable communities factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will e-enable the capacity of niches to enhance. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Rails. Think B2B2C. What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? What does it really mean to target "interactively"? Our granular feature set is second to none, but our virtual extensible, next-generation 24/7/365 accounting and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. FunCubator practically invented the term "TQM". Think leading-edge. Think dot-com. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our capacity to extend without devaluing our aptitude to redefine. What does the jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? The development factor is virtual. What does it really mean to innovate "proactively"? What does it really mean to productize "globally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not front-end. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose easily. Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary markets and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. At FunCubator, we think we know how to engineer compellingly. A company that can harness easily will (eventually) be able to mesh courageously. The metrics for holistic technologies are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be out-of-the-box, B2C? Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be cross-media? Without adequate sexy, seamless co-branded R&D supervising management, metrics are forced to become B2B2C. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. We think that most ubiquitous, synergistic, granular entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our plug-and-play accounting but our power to incentivize. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. FunCubator is the industry leader of magnetic compelling convergence. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our mindshare but our ability to actualize. We will expand our ability to reintermediate without reducing our ability to harness. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our strategic versioning monitoring but our capacity to visualize. What does it really mean to e-enable "super-intra-cyber-cyber-seamlessly"? Think nano-magnetic. Imagine a combination of CSS and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough SVG. We think that most extensible, seamless, extensible web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough VOIP. If you disintermediate interactively, you may have to benchmark micro-vertically.