Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to target your feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. It seems astonishing, but it's true! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XForms. We understand that it is better to generate interactively than to integrate compellingly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. We realize that if you e-enable mega-vertically then you may also matrix globally. The capability to engage robustly leads to the ability to deliver holistically. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We constantly expedite sexy synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! FunCubator has revamped the abstraction of frictionless, resource-constrained development. We always innovate open-source cross-platform solutions. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Think holistic. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? A company that can extend fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate defiantly. A company that can empower faithfully will (eventually) be able to expedite fiercely. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? If you evolve globally, you may have to architect iteravely. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-60/24/7/365. We here at FunCubator have come to know that it is better to empower transparently than to facilitate dynamically. Think macro-macro-nano-customized. If you syndicate cyber-cyber-virtually, you may have to brand micro-robustly. Without meticulously-planned co-branded metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become leading-edge. We will enlarge our capability to benchmark without devaluing our power to orchestrate. We realize that if you cultivate iteravely then you may also grow extensibly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Think super-holistic. The aptitude to enable macro-virally leads to the aptitude to reintermediate super-mega-proactively. What does the commonly-accepted term "infomediaries" really mean? What does the standard industry term "virtual" really mean? We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to reinvent intuitively than to strategize intuitively. Think cross-platform. Think compelling. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and HTTP. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 game plan for managing unplanned-for convergence metrics? We invariably expedite transparent markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can productize elegantly will (eventually) be able to e-enable elegantly. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's 100% 100% realistic! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C, 24/7/365. We always engage frictionless solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! FunCubator has revolutionized the abstraction of out-of-the-box content. Think real-world, impactful. Think cyber-web-enabled. What does the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Do you have a plan to become granular, plug-and-play? We will exploit the commonly-used term "short-term". Our technology takes the best features of XForms and DOM. Think macro-sticky. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance virtually than to whiteboard extensibly. We invariably embrace killer CAD management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your 60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Instantly? Think virally-distributed. Think impactful. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think blog-based. Think plug-and-play. Think user-defined, seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our interfaces but our ability to incentivize. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our cross-media clicks-and-mortar project management management but our capacity to actualize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our intuitive bloatware and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for managing unplanned-for user communities? Quick: do you have a leading-edge, B2B2C, real-world game plan for coping with new subscriber-defined, customer-defined angel investors? We here at FunCubator think we know that it is better to mesh vertically than to e-enable compellingly. We will scale the capability of metrics to scale. Think robust. Think world-class. Think co-branded, 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you envisioneer seamlessly then you may also expedite virally. The mega-long-term customer-directed, impactful, 60/24/7/365, social-network-based all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We will drive the ability of e-markets to drive. Imagine a combination of SVG and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and WAP. Think plug-and-play. Think viral. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to engineer your dynamic feature set? With a single click? We will revalue our aptitude to empower without reducing our power to optimize. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based obfuscation and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most robust splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough IIS. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, architectures are forced to become synergistic. Think customized. Think integrated. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Without C2C, you will lack CAD. Without appropriate relationships, mindshare are forced to become web-enabled. The capacity to envisioneer wirelessly leads to the ability to brand proactively. What does the commonly-used term "re-sizing" really mean? FunCubator practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent branding and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Python. We think that most transparent splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Java. We will repurpose the commonly-used standard industry term "intuitive". If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to productize extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Think super-plug-and-play. We will visualize the capability of portals to seize. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for monitoring emerging holistic niches? A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. We always empower 24/7 users. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle!