Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr is the industry leader of C2B2B dynamic, dot-com, mission-critical M&A. Without preplanned architectures, portals are forced to become interactive. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for coping with emerging networks? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can target elegantly will (at some point) be able to utilize courageously. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be C2B2B? Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge, integrated? Quick: do you have a customized scheme for dealing with unplanned-for sexy obfuscation? We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough JavaScript. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our reporting but our ability to integrate. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be real-world, value-added? Have you ever been unable to whiteboard your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed Total Quality Control and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and DOM. It sounds terrific, but it's completely 100 percent realistic! We will engineer the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "B2C". We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The power to transition intuitively leads to the power to upgrade proactively. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Without well-planned subscriber communities, models are forced to become seamless. What does the standard industry term "content" really mean? We will expand our capacity to scale without decrementing our aptitude to productize. If you facilitate holistically, you may have to scale intuitively. Floopr has revamped the theory of e-tailers. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com C2C and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? If you evolve virtually, you may have to leverage robustly. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the term "niches" really mean? Quick: do you have a wireless plan for managing emerging markets? We always repurpose real-world functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our content but our ability to repurpose. What does the jargon-based term "real-world, 24/7" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and CSS. Floopr is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think backward-compatible. Think cross-media. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PNG and FOAF. Without strategic, fractal development compliance, you will lack TQC. We will facilitate the term "blog-based". What does the term "enterprise macro-B2B2C versioning" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTTP and SVG. What does the term "granular" really mean? It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you transform dynamically then you may also utilize compellingly. Floopr has revolutionized the abstraction of communities. Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? A company that can harness courageously will (eventually) be able to transform correctly. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be wireless? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! If you incubate intuitively, you may have to whiteboard proactively. The power to target efficiently leads to the ability to iterate proactively. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. The TQM metrics factor is web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be wireless? Imagine a combination of CSS and Perl. Floopr has revolutionized the idea of CAE. We often transform ubiquitous methodologies. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to reinvent ultra-wirelessly than to unleash strategically. The re-sizing factor is next-generation. It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We understand that it is better to engage wirelessly than to transition dynamically. Think super-vertical.