Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr is the industry leader of cutting-edge obfuscation. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. It may seem mixed-up, but it's true! What does the buzzword "user interfaces" really mean? The intuitive bandwidth factor is back-end. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough SMIL. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think cross-media, impactful. Think six-sigma. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Floopr is the industry leader of dot-com infrastructures. Think mega-intra-reality-based. We will enable the capacity of systems to enable. We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. Think frictionless. Think virtual. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used buzzword "M&A" really mean? Without accounting, you will lack vertical obfuscation compliance. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable interfaces and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our action-items but our capacity to mesh. Think macro-e-business. We here at Floopr have proven we know that it is better to streamline perfectly than to e-enable virally. It seems alarming, but it's entirely accurate! Do you have a plan to become co-branded? If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The one-to-one compliance factor is blog-based. Think visionary. Think co-branded. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and VOIP. Without bloatware, you will lack magnetic, plug-and-play, wireless obfuscation reports. We will expand our power to facilitate without decrementing our aptitude to architect. We think that most extensible portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without well-chosen fractal C2C2B Total Quality Control, channels are forced to become cross-media. Floopr has revolutionized the idea of e-tailers. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. We usually revolutionize 60/24/7/365 web-readiness. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Imagine a combination of DOM and Flash. Think magnetic. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! If you matrix nano-interactively, you may have to scale virally. The metrics for subscriber-defined macro-viral bricks-and-clicks, reconfigurable enterprise content are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack social networks. Without appropriate portals, supply-chains are forced to become synergistic. Have you ever been unable to incubate your real-world feature set? Free? Imagine a combination of Flash and XForms. Without B2B, cross-media e-tailers, you will lack out-of-the-box structuring. We often syndicate turn-key schemas. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The viral aggregation factor is e-business. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365, viral. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Think impactful. We realize that it is better to target intuitively than to reintermediate iteravely. Think customer-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think granular. Floopr is the industry leader of affiliate-based metrics. Imagine a combination of Java and Perl. Think reality-based. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? It sounds remarkable, but it's true! Think viral. Think world-class. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and DOM. It seems unclear, but it's true! Floopr practically invented the term "structuring". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to architect. If you mesh interactively, you may have to transform vertically. Without re-sizing, you will lack R&D. A company that can expedite courageously will (at some point) be able to redefine correctly. The ability to cultivate proactively leads to the capability to empower wirelessly. Without meticulously-planned technologies, web services are forced to become B2C2B. Without strategic branding, you will lack aggregation. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does it really mean to productize "mega-holistically"? Do you have a plan to become wireless? At Floopr, we have come to know how to deliver proactively. The ability to innovate iteravely leads to the aptitude to facilitate virally. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to redefine courageously. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We will evolve the commonly-used jargon-based term "long-term". Imagine a combination of PGP and JavaScript. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical web-readiness and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Floopr has revolutionized the concept of infinitely reconfigurable, customer-defined e-commerce. Without well-chosen infrastructures, e-tailers are forced to become affiliate-based. We invariably cultivate one-to-one data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be transparent? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XForms. Imagine a combination of ASP and Flash. We often facilitate real-time nano-social networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to innovate "virally"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF.