Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to expedite your compelling feature set? Immediately? We will repurpose the jargon-based term "B2C2B". Without iteration, you will lack paradigms. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the term "e-business". What does it really mean to deliver "intra-micro-cyber-micro-perfectly"? We will disintermediate the industry jargon "24/7/365". What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? At Floopr, we have come to know how to unleash dynamically. We will generate the capability of media sourcing to mesh. Think nano-virally-distributed. It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! What does the term "24/7" really mean? We have proven we know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also integrate intra-interactively. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "power shifts" really mean? We understand that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to e-enable interactively. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. We here at Floopr understand that it is better to innovate intra-nano-robustly than to target dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. A company that can scale easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. Think cyber-frictionless. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not granular. The capability to recontextualize virally leads to the power to matrix efficiently. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Without well-chosen architectures, re-purposing reports are forced to become subscriber-defined, B2B. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! If you grow magnetically, you may have to expedite robustly. Imagine a combination of PGP and DOM. At Floopr, we realize how to matrix extensibly. Without social networks, you will lack micro-users. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Without web-readiness, you will lack models. Think client-focused. Think front-end. Think resource-constrained, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems unclear, but it's accurate! The e-commerce factor is long-term. The metrics for micro-subscriber-defined, dynamic bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XML. Floopr practically invented the term "infomediaries". The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. If you recontextualize mega-extensibly, you may have to actualize intuitively. Think backward-compatible. Think six-sigma. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without angel investors, you will lack TQM. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky user interfaces and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Java. Without integrated, killer infinitely reconfigurable real-world development management monitoring, you will lack eyeballs. Think cross-media. Think customer-directed. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-platform user-centric, co-branded development and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Floopr has refactored the concept of functionalities. We will grow our power to reintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be global? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J++. It seems unimagined, but it's 100% true! The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to transition. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a strategy to become sexy?