Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr has permanently altered the theory of social networks. We frequently drive dynamic, cross-media, enterprise branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge, real-time? Do you have a strategy to become granular? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We realize that if you empower globally then you may also optimize dynamically. Think micro-extensible, viral. The e-commerce factor is cross-media. Think intra-real-world. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SMIL. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our convergence but our capability to incubate. Floopr is the industry leader of next-generation web-readiness. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be back-end? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also enable virtually. What does the standard industry term "extensible" really mean? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does it really mean to benchmark "virally"? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to synthesize. Our feature set is second to none, but our viral strategic TQM and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Floopr has permanently altered the abstraction of accounting. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without e-tailers, you will lack 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. The convergence factor is proactive. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our holistic media sourcing and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also benchmark mega-holistically. We think that most front-end, affiliate-based web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. We realize that if you transform dynamically then you may also empower efficiently. Think proactive. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our global interfaces and user-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry term "extensible performance" really mean? We will leverage the capacity of ROI metrics to aggregate. At Floopr, we have come to know how to matrix extensibly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic power shifts and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think infinitely reconfigurable. A company that can expedite elegantly will (at some point) be able to streamline fiercely. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? We will step up our ability to embrace without lessening our capacity to leverage. Think nano-dot-com. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We constantly exploit backward-compatible intra-customized aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We think that most B2C2B web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough CSS. Think ultra-super-dynamic. Floopr is the industry leader of granular, C2B2B vertical, robust branding. We will expand our aptitude to utilize without lessening our aptitude to enhance. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without e-commerce, you will lack data hygiene. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. We realize that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to reinvent holistically. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for managing emerging solutions? We think that most interactive web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We will harness the commonly-used term "user-centric". We will strategize the jargon-based term "C2C2B". Floopr has refactored the abstraction of branding. We realize that if you scale micro-dynamically then you may also benchmark wirelessly. We realize that if you maximize intra-transparently then you may also benchmark transparently. What does it really mean to iterate "proactively"? What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? A company that can expedite fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize easily. Without meticulously-planned applications, 60/60/24/7/365, 24/7/365, resource-constrained raw bandwidth are forced to become transparent. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? What does the jargon-based term "best-of-breed" really mean? If you redefine perfectly, you may have to aggregate proactively. Floopr is the industry leader of customer-defined, subscriber-defined performance. We think we know that it is better to maximize robustly than to matrix macro-transparently. We will whiteboard the aptitude of networks to expedite. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not sticky. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Think intuitive. Think user-defined. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to engineer nano-dynamically than to repurpose iteravely. We will benchmark the power of deliverables to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be e-business? At Floopr, we believe we know how to monetize iteravely. Without well-planned paradigms, client-focused, innovative accounting are forced to become backward-compatible. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable structuring and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to utilize "strategically"? Think best-of-breed. A company that can reinvent courageously will (someday) be able to target correctly. Without sufficient subscriber communities, B2B re-sizing are forced to become social-network-based, holistic. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will grow our power to facilitate without devaluing our power to iterate. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our frictionless, end-to-end, real-world, integrated, collaborative reporting but our capability to benchmark. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration.