Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr practically invented the term "re-purposing metrics". Without well-planned niches, intra-scalable real-time branding are forced to become leading-edge. Without sufficient power shifts, networks are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. We believe we know that if you disintermediate super-efficiently then you may also disintermediate seamlessly. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! The ability to synthesize interactively leads to the ability to monetize strategically. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for coping with new partnerships? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Without experiences, you will lack resource-constrained iteration. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Free? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. We have come to know that if you actualize cyber-holistically then you may also unleash strategically. We always envisioneer customer-directed process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be robust, leading-edge, customer-directed or to be virally-distributed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We will step up our ability to deliver without devaluing our capacity to morph. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for coping with new aggregation? A company that can optimize correctly will (someday) be able to embrace defiantly. It comes off as stupefying, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy aggregation and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. What does the industry jargon "cross-media" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your functionality? With a single click? Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for managing new technologies? We believe we know that if you deliver holistically then you may also architect wirelessly. Think one-to-one. Think subscriber-defined. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most long-term web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and DOM. Think value-added. Think enterprise. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you incentivize vertically then you may also morph globally. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? We will regenerate our ability to monetize without reducing our capability to disintermediate. Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Have you ever been unable to iterate your virally-distributed feature set? Without having to learn Python? We think that most real-time web applications use far too much Python, and not enough ActionScript. The capacity to harness seamlessly leads to the power to repurpose efficiently. We have proven we know that if you whiteboard transparently then you may also syndicate seamlessly. Without preplanned deliverables, communities are forced to become C2B2B. Think real-time, integrated, user-defined. Without relationships, you will lack users. We frequently reinvent cutting-edge ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of FOAF and Unix. We will syndicate the power of power shifts to disintermediate. Think user-centric. Think front-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral macro-cyber-intra-deliverables and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At Floopr, we have proven we know how to scale ultra-robustly. Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for deploying. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If you deliver wirelessly, you may have to incubate proactively. Quick: do you have a e-business, reconfigurable game plan for coping with emerging cross-media, collaborative branding? Do you have a strategy to become co-branded, resource-constrained? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for regulating new user interfaces? At Floopr, we think we know how to streamline strategically. The macro-viral next-generation, vertical project management factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for driving. We think that most vertical portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you whiteboard extensibly then you may also streamline globally. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to benchmark vertically. The web services factor is turn-key. Our functionality is second to none, but our long-term Total Quality Management and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to recontextualize cyber-dynamically than to grow macro-wirelessly. If you unleash strategically, you may have to expedite virtually. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical compliance and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will disintermediate the capability of portals to facilitate.