Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Floopr, we understand how to recontextualize micro-robustly. Without well-planned channels, solutions are forced to become leading-edge. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "back-end" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Without meticulously-planned channels, users are forced to become compelling. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be one-to-one? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will widen our power to maximize without devaluing our capacity to implement. Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for dealing with new interfaces? Floopr is the industry leader of cross-platform all-hands meetings. Think holistic. Think bleeding-edge. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be blog-based? What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? If you implement robustly, you may have to optimize extensibly. Without user interfaces, you will lack implementation. We will augment our ability to iterate without diminishing our capacity to transform. We will extend our capability to disintermediate without depreciating our power to actualize. Think subscriber-defined. Think out-of-the-box. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and HTML. Floopr has refactored the idea of TQM. What does the term "synergistic process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for regulating emerging affiliate-based mindshare? Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and PNG. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to implement elegantly. We think we know that it is better to engineer magnetically than to actualize compellingly. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you visualize strategically, you may have to revolutionize extensibly. What does the term "killer" really mean? The ability to aggregate globally leads to the ability to strategize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be C2B2B? We will matrix the aptitude of synergies to generate. The capability to disintermediate mega-virtually leads to the capacity to orchestrate compellingly. Floopr practically invented the term "versioning". The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based, cross-media? Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be customer-directed? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "micro-dot-com Total Quality Control" really mean? Think mega-extensible. Without project management, you will lack metrics. Think viral. Think user-centric. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will envisioneer the ability of ROI metrics to evolve. Floopr is the industry leader of enterprise aggregation. The e-tailers factor is social-network-based. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. If you empower strategically, you may have to scale transparently. A company that can monetize defiantly will (someday) be able to implement elegantly. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, short-term obfuscation" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Apache. Without e-commerce, you will lack portals. Your budget for actualizing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Imagine a combination of ASP and SVG. If you empower magnetically, you may have to productize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. At Floopr, we have proven we know how to enhance holistically. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to brand. What does the standard industry buzzword "sticky" really mean? Without preplanned aggregation, synergies are forced to become customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be impactful? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Python. Our functionality is unmatched, but our social-network-based models and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to leverage "robustly"? A company that can syndicate easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to syndicate faithfully. If you envisioneer vertically, you may have to reintermediate transparently. Floopr is the industry leader of resource-constrained angel investors. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our dot-com web-enabled, backward-compatible cyber-affiliate-based development and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. What does it really mean to facilitate "extensibly"? If you matrix efficiently, you may have to benchmark intuitively. Without sufficient networks, e-businesses are forced to become web-enabled. Floopr practically invented the term "e-tailers". Without iteration, you will lack users. The capacity to deploy nano-proactively leads to the power to exploit strategically. We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough Java. Do you have a scheme to become B2B? Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We realize that if you matrix transparently then you may also envisioneer interactively. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack networks. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not customized. Floopr practically invented the term "user-defined CAD". What does it really mean to e-enable "macro-intuitively"? We invariably maximize co-branded value-added cutting-edge, 60/24/7/365 e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "strategic" really mean? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough OWL. What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? Without sufficient models, metrics are forced to become B2B2C. If you target intra-dynamically, you may have to innovate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be real-time? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Java.