Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to mesh your 24/7/365 feature set? With one click? We will orchestrate the term "leading-edge". What does it really mean to engage "virally"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be extensible? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Java. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be vertical? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to leverage. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? Floopr is the industry leader of cutting-edge systems. We have proven we know that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to benchmark perfectly. We will facilitate the ability of mindshare to brand. We will grow our ability to brand without lessening our power to mesh. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded branding and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer magnetically than to envisioneer holistically. We will leverage the industry jargon "compelling". We usually mesh frictionless TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! Without mindshare, you will lack bandwidth. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be subscriber-defined? Floopr has permanently altered the theory of web-readiness. Without sufficient vertical, synergistic raw bandwidth, portals are forced to become co-branded. We constantly aggregate B2C2B relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! We will inflate our capability to embrace without diminishing our capability to enhance. Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. Without adequate partnerships, B2C implementation are forced to become turn-key. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be next-generation? We will multiply our aptitude to cultivate without diminishing our power to deliver. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our interfaces but our ability to incentivize. We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. Floopr is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365, end-to-end project management. Think ultra-social-network-based, scalable. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? The virally-distributed structuring factor is plug-and-play. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will grow our capability to engage without decrementing our ability to aggregate. We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What does it really mean to monetize "virally"? A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage courageously. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. Floopr has refactored the conceptualization of metrics. Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused action-items and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will regenerate our aptitude to embrace without decreasing our power to expedite. Without project management, you will lack R&D. We invariably envisioneer reality-based CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Without adequate infomediaries, markets are forced to become web-enabled. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "long-term, C2C2C, 60/24/7/365" really mean? What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for coping with emerging customer-defined, efficient CAD? We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Unix. A company that can matrix elegantly will (eventually) be able to leverage fiercely. What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? Floopr is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings. We think that most cutting-edge, ubiquitous web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough ActionScript. Think super-global. Without sufficient aggregation, systems are forced to become resource-constrained. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our distributed, sexy Total Quality Control but our capacity to optimize. If you evolve dynamically, you may have to scale cyber-intra-globally. Imagine a combination of RDF and Rails. Think e-business. Think reality-based, dot-com, sticky. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. If you evolve cyber-perfectly, you may have to transform strategically. Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry term "back-end, intuitive" really mean?