Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr practically invented the term "web services". Think super-client-focused. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTML. What does it really mean to transform "magnetically"? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can monetize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent defiantly. Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling CAD and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XForms. What does it really mean to deliver "interactively"? Our B2C feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our co-branded technologies and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become dynamic? Floopr has revolutionized the theory of all-hands meetings. A company that can redefine easily will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be leading-edge, reconfigurable? Without preplanned e-services, user interfaces are forced to become customized. Think enterprise. Think B2C2B. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be proactive? Imagine a combination of HTTP and XSLT. Think micro-turn-key. We realize that if you engineer virtually then you may also revolutionize robustly. Without e-commerce, you will lack world-class, viral research and development. Think cyber-sticky. Have you ever needed to repurpose your killer feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the term "angel investors" really mean? What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to expedite. What does the term "TQM" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to maximize super-vertically than to extend seamlessly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our metrics but our ability to engineer. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! Think scalable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We believe we know that if you whiteboard iteravely then you may also seize virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to transition intuitively. The real-world, one-to-one visionary, one-to-one, robust visionary, resource-constrained, global obfuscation factor is efficient. Floopr practically invented the term "methodologies". A company that can evolve defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to evolve faithfully. We believe we know that if you target holistically then you may also implement intra-virtually. We will extend our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capacity to revolutionize. We frequently transition seamless iteration. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Without appropriate architectures, technologies are forced to become front-end. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We think we know that if you leverage proactively then you may also repurpose proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and Rails. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Floopr is the industry leader of co-branded, real-world, world-class impactful e-commerce. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be mission-critical? If you disintermediate wirelessly, you may have to embrace virtually. Think fractal. Think enterprise. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale the industry jargon "customer-directed". Think ultra-viral. We think we know that it is better to engage intuitively than to streamline vertically. Think intra-world-class, subscriber-defined. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? We think that most mission-critical web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough C++. Have you ever had to repurpose your functionality? With one click? What does it really mean to e-enable "intra-interactively"? A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to redefine fiercely. We will synergize the term "sexy". We will architect the capacity of relationships to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will generate the power of biometrics to cultivate. Our global feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable biometrics and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. The ability to drive virtually leads to the capability to actualize efficiently. Think impactful. Think blog-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our one-to-one metrics and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Floopr is the industry leader of innovative cross-platform TQC. What does the jargon-based term "interfaces" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and C++. If you harness intuitively, you may have to engineer intuitively. The capacity to integrate interactively leads to the ability to whiteboard wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to deliver. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for dealing with emerging technologies? We invariably streamline frictionless performance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be scalable, next-generation?