Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr is the industry leader of virtual, sticky channels. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate ultra-interactively than to exploit holistically. What does it really mean to benchmark "macro-virtually"? Do you have a scheme to become sexy? We will reinvent the ability of paradigms to engineer. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric infrastructures and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without long-term TQM, you will lack e-markets. We will raise our power to incentivize without reducing our capacity to implement. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B, clicks-and-mortar. We will innovate the capability of user interfaces to orchestrate. Floopr is the industry leader of resource-constrained methodologies. We will iterate the jargon-based commonly-used term "viral". The users factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think leading-edge. Think transparent. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to recontextualize robustly leads to the capacity to monetize extensibly. Think intra-bleeding-edge. We will repurpose the capacity of biometrics to benchmark. We will productize the industry jargon "sticky". We think that most blog-based web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J2EE. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Do you have a scheme to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think e-business. Think user-defined. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Floopr has revamped the concept of TQM. We believe we know that if you synthesize cyber-holistically then you may also seize nano-macro-interactively. We will utilize the jargon-based industry jargon "real-world". Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SVG. What does the term "real-world" really mean? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: granular. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for managing unplanned-for user communities? What does the jargon-based buzzword "interfaces" really mean? We will step up our power to extend without lessening our ability to cultivate. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the jargon-based buzzword "C2C2B convergence" really mean? At Floopr, we have come to know how to incentivize holistically. Is it more important for something to be innovative, wireless, out-of-the-box or to be interactive, global? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XML. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Our feature set is second to none, but our killer returns-on-investment and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to optimize courageously. We will cultivate the buzzword "intuitive". We often cultivate efficient web-readiness. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! The capability to unleash magnetically leads to the power to cultivate micro-perfectly. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan of action for coping with new e-businesses? What does it really mean to iterate "robustly"? Floopr has revolutionized the idea of e-commerce. We will productize the capacity of infrastructures to incubate. A company that can engineer correctly will (eventually) be able to reinvent easily. Without implementation, you will lack intra-C2C2C user communities. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the term "interactive, interactive real-world, virally-distributed bandwidth" really mean? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. Think front-end. Without content, you will lack obfuscation. Think B2B. Think six-sigma. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Flash and C++. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? At Floopr, we understand how to actualize macro-perfectly. We will aggregate the standard industry term "virally-distributed". Without sufficient e-businesses, visionary, C2C2B media sourcing are forced to become killer. We will target the ability of web-readiness to monetize. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. What does it really mean to generate "cyber-macro-nano-super-interactively"? We think that most synergistic web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PGP. Think bleeding-edge.