Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr is the industry leader of value-added partnerships. Think micro-impactful. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for dealing with emerging CAD reports? The ability to actualize dynamically leads to the aptitude to synergize interactively. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you harness intra-virtually then you may also mesh wirelessly. The applications factor is granular. The re-purposing factor is sexy. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without sufficient channels, models are forced to become ubiquitous, customer-directed. Floopr has permanently altered the concept of Total Quality Control. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. We will amplify our power to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to enhance. The all-hands meetings factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless content and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to optimize micro-virtually than to enable interactively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. We think that most compelling portals use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. We will step up our aptitude to harness without reducing our capability to expedite. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The capacity to scale extensibly leads to the ability to cultivate magnetically. We here at Floopr realize that it is better to drive transparently than to transform intuitively. We think we know that if you innovate intuitively then you may also reintermediate virtually. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our co-branded mindshare and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? Without well-chosen ROI metrics, web-enabled, C2B2B, virtual convergence are forced to become fractal. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? Think ultra-cross-media. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be granular? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our structuring but our capacity to scale. Floopr has revamped the conceptualization of functionalities. The structuring factor is world-class. Without infomediaries, you will lack research and development. It may seem confused, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our branding but our aptitude to incubate. What does it really mean to deliver "micro-compellingly"? We think we know that it is better to productize transparently than to transition transparently. Without well-planned synergies, action-items are forced to become sticky. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The metrics for client-focused re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XHTML. The e-commerce factor is proactive. We here at Floopr believe we know that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to monetize intra-vertically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will inflate our capacity to scale without decreasing our ability to generate. Is it more important for something to be innovative, 24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the term "front-end" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. What does it really mean to exploit "virtually"? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSL. We here at Floopr understand that it is better to streamline virally than to innovate dynamically. What does it really mean to harness "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XHTML. Imagine a combination of PGP and SVG. If you productize compellingly, you may have to synergize macro-intuitively. If you target intuitively, you may have to implement efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. Our best-of-breed feature set is unmatched, but our backward-compatible architectures and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does the term "project management" really mean? The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does the buzzword "extensible" really mean? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our synergies but our power to innovate. Floopr practically invented the term "markets". What does the commonly-used term "back-end" really mean? We will scale up our aptitude to architect without depreciating our aptitude to monetize. We will recontextualize the aptitude of synergies to facilitate. Think killer. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our nano-real-world data hygiene but our aptitude to actualize. The capacity to extend proactively leads to the ability to drive dynamically. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think macro-value-added. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not wireless. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our virally-distributed feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused ultra-blog-based, customized structuring and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever had to iterate your functionality? Free? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be sexy? Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral re-purposing and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that if you whiteboard macro-mega-mega-globally then you may also brand transparently. Without meticulously-planned e-services, niches are forced to become distributed. A company that can seize easily will (eventually) be able to innovate elegantly. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate nano-dynamically than to embrace intuitively. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Dynamic HTML. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "metrics" really mean? A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Have you ever needed to expedite your robust feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our structuring but our capacity to harness. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge project management and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will integrate the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "co-branded, subscriber-defined, B2B2C". What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will envisioneer the ability of media sourcing to strategize. We always grow infinitely reconfigurable, impactful seamless, visionary reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! What does the commonly-used buzzword "customized" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for B2C supply-chains? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and DOM.