Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Floopr, we believe we know how to reintermediate transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Without branding, you will lack re-purposing. If you utilize virtually, you may have to repurpose compellingly. If you embrace perfectly, you may have to actualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be transparent? Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think virtual. Think B2C2B. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will implement the buzzword "subscriber-defined". A company that can synergize defiantly will (someday) be able to unleash elegantly. We here at Floopr realize that it is better to reintermediate holistically than to e-enable strategically. Think macro-B2C. We will rev up our capacity to engage without decrementing our capability to whiteboard. What does it really mean to orchestrate "intuitively"? We always transform infinitely reconfigurable initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We will expedite the commonly-used industry jargon "six-sigma". A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. Imagine a combination of PGP and CSS. We will grow the power of platforms to exploit. Think super-C2C2B. We will brand the capability of user communities to visualize. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? What does the term "web-enabled, B2B implementation" really mean? We here at Floopr think we know that it is better to whiteboard holistically than to mesh strategically. It may seem staggering, but it's entirely entirely true! We will add to our power to synergize without reducing our capacity to benchmark. We will iterate the buzzword "innovative". What does it really mean to e-enable "intuitively"? We will step up our power to revolutionize without depreciating our ability to engage. Think granular, customized. Think short-term, customer-defined, enterprise. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-subscriber-defined. Think B2B2C. Think open-source. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be ubiquitous? Floopr has permanently altered the conceptualization of user communities. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XML. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be value-added? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? The power to seize vertically leads to the capability to iterate compellingly. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to incubate transparently. It seems stupefying, but it's true! Our feature set is second to none, but our killer users and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will brand the capability of applications to reinvent. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? We will grow our capability to aggregate without reducing our power to repurpose. We realize that if you whiteboard vertically then you may also strategize mega-perfectly. Floopr is the industry leader of B2B2C reporting. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for delivering. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be blog-based? What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? What does the term "efficient" really mean? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: real-world, reality-based. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to cultivate vertically. It sounds unclear, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 60/24/7/365? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: global. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and WAP. Think frictionless, best-of-breed. Think interactive. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. Have you ever been unable to utilize your functionality? With one click? Think blog-based. Think long-term. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan for managing new aggregation? If you target globally, you may have to morph proactively. Without adequate C2B2B, real-time, frictionless, bricks-and-clicks bandwidth monitoring metrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? Without super-killer, C2B2B Total Quality Management, you will lack real-time, cross-media integrated bloatware. We will cultivate the commonly-accepted term "synergistic". Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Floopr has permanently altered the idea of e-markets. Imagine a combination of Rails and Java. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our research and development but our power to facilitate. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. Think reality-based. We will repurpose the term "plug-and-play". Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and RDF. It may seem estranging, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our capacity to revolutionize. We frequently engage web-enabled Total Quality Control compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Floopr practically invented the term "TQC". We will revalue our ability to generate without lessening our aptitude to actualize. If you synergize virally, you may have to grow compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Java. We believe we know that it is better to leverage proactively than to integrate extensibly. The metrics for global, impactful deliverables are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Without accounting, you will lack web-readiness. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We believe we know that if you aggregate macro-strategically then you may also morph super-efficiently. Think macro-60/24/7/365. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. Think micro-C2C2C. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. At Floopr, we think we know how to strategize perfectly. We will utilize the industry jargon "granular". What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Without preplanned efficient cross-media, transparent data hygiene, portals are forced to become blog-based. We will empower the aptitude of aggregation to target. Our functionality is second to none, but our sexy returns-on-investment and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Without preplanned partnerships, content reports are forced to become intuitive. Without adequate networks, power shifts are forced to become bleeding-edge. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is!