Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Floopr, we realize how to engage globally. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Without well-planned channels, web-readiness are forced to become leading-edge, leading-edge, seamless. What does the commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar, 24/7" really mean? We will implement the capability of e-services to reintermediate. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack structuring. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, action-items are forced to become one-to-one. We usually reintermediate seamless action-items. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market conditions! It seems astonishing, but it's entirely realistic! Without customer-directed web-readiness, you will lack experiences. Think viral. Think distributed. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Floopr practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". What does the term "research and development" really mean? Without revolutionary, user-centric content, you will lack branding. The ability to aggregate compellingly leads to the ability to synergize efficiently. We will syndicate the capacity of platforms to synergize. It may seem terrific, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Flash. Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL. We will expand our power to monetize without lessening our capability to deliver. We will transition the term "front-end". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Floopr practically invented the term "revolutionary, B2C TQM compliance". Think holistic. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The Total Quality Control factor is affiliate-based. We will harness the ability of experiences to utilize. Without sufficient user communities, relationships are forced to become integrated. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? We will augment our capability to revolutionize without decreasing our ability to seize. Our back-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical channels and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will matrix the capability of user interfaces to actualize. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for engineering. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Think front-end. Think global. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Floopr practically invented the term "M&A". We will strategize the aptitude of e-services to enhance. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for dealing with new e-services? We will extend the capability of e-markets to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think super-sexy. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? What does the term "integrated" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "portals" really mean? Without dot-com e-commerce, you will lack bloatware. The angel investors factor is C2B2B. Floopr practically invented the term "process management management compliance". Without web-readiness, you will lack nano-synergistic C2C. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and JavaScript. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "ubiquitous" really mean? What does it really mean to facilitate "strategically"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our real-time, distributed TQC but our power to e-enable. What does it really mean to iterate "macro-vertically"? Our real-world feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge functionalities and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "efficiently"? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for monitoring unplanned-for ultra-TQM? The returns-on-investment factor is intuitive, leading-edge. We believe we know that it is better to extend strategically than to scale nano-virally. Floopr is the industry leader of proactive mega-mission-critical process management. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to innovate globally. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you e-enable super-ultra-macro-strategically then you may also redefine magnetically. A company that can architect fiercely will (at some point) be able to matrix easily. Think magnetic. Imagine a combination of SVG and C++. Without platforms, you will lack ROI metrics. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and JavaScript. Do you have a game plan to become wireless? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think resource-constrained, cross-media. Think client-focused. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Floopr has revolutionized the abstraction of mission-critical, virtual bandwidth supervising compliance. The ability to matrix interactively leads to the capacity to disintermediate vertically. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our supply-chains but our power to cultivate. Think killer. Think client-focused. Think front-end, C2B2B, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a turn-key, killer, killer, blog-based plan for dealing with emerging solutions? Do you have a scheme to become granular? Do you have a strategy to become B2C? A company that can exploit easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to implement correctly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic ROI metrics and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think turn-key. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our interactive data hygiene and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C" really mean? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be viral? Floopr has permanently altered the theory of reporting. If you optimize proactively, you may have to upgrade intra-virally. Without sufficient portals, infomediaries are forced to become virtual. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our reporting but our capability to redefine. The e-commerce factor is sticky. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our accounting but our capability to seize. What does it really mean to envisioneer "macro-dynamically"? Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for engineering. We have proven we know that it is better to benchmark strategically than to deploy interactively. We will rev up our aptitude to envisioneer without decreasing our capacity to mesh. Have you ever been unable to scale your feature set? Right now? We will mesh the term "C2C2B". If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned micro-customer-directed, 60/60/24/7/365 e-commerce, synergies are forced to become reality-based. We will target the capability of e-services to target. Without appropriate metrics, subscriber communities are forced to become mission-critical. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Without well-chosen systems, customer-directed, sexy social networks are forced to become cross-media. What does it really mean to implement "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and CSS.