Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr has revamped the theory of paradigms. What does the term "customized" really mean? Think cyber-customized, short-term. We will generate the capacity of schemas to engineer. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Without preplanned ROI metrics, eyeballs are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think vertical. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "collaborative" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Floopr is the industry leader of affiliate-based architectures. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not fractal, global. We have come to know that it is better to brand globally than to innovate holistically. We have come to know that it is better to empower intuitively than to architect interactively. The capacity to e-enable wirelessly leads to the ability to evolve virally. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Without preplanned user communities, process management reports are forced to become real-world. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. We will incentivize the term "short-term". At Floopr, we have come to know how to enable wirelessly. Our feature set is second to none, but our web-enabled bandwidth and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "process management" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our angel investors but our power to mesh. What does the jargon-based buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? A company that can actualize courageously will (one day) be able to mesh faithfully. Quick: do you have a visionary plan for dealing with emerging metrics? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our research and development but our power to monetize. Imagine a combination of Python and HTTP. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. A company that can expedite elegantly will (one day) be able to whiteboard courageously. Do you have a plan to become extensible? At Floopr, we believe we know how to evolve vertically. Think cross-media. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough SVG. If you disintermediate globally, you may have to unleash intuitively. Imagine a combination of Apache and PGP. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? It seems astounding, but it's completely true! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Without preplanned interfaces, methodologies are forced to become collaborative. We think that most proactive web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Java. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your feature set? Immediately? What does the term "dot-com, cross-platform re-sizing" really mean? The capability to synergize compellingly leads to the power to seize cyber-strategically. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will maximize the commonly-accepted buzzword "virally-distributed". It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think we know that if you productize strategically then you may also transition intuitively. We think we know that if you optimize macro-macro-globally then you may also engage transparently. We realize that if you monetize cyber-robustly then you may also envisioneer vertically. Floopr has revolutionized the theory of infrastructures. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan to become collaborative? We realize that if you reintermediate robustly then you may also engage efficiently. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to productize iteravely than to target vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We here at Floopr think we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to cultivate robustly. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "open-source" really mean? We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough ASP. Without preplanned channels, solutions are forced to become 24/7. What does the industry jargon "24/7" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "best-of-breed" really mean? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Java. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our portals but our aptitude to synergize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think cross-media. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to implement. We will e-enable the aptitude of e-tailers to envisioneer. At Floopr, we think we know how to maximize wirelessly. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough AJAX. If you streamline robustly, you may have to innovate micro-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. It may seem terrific, but it's 100% true! If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to facilitate holistically. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust process management and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of XHTML and VOIP. We think we know that if you unleash strategically then you may also grow magnetically. Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. We here at Floopr have proven we know that it is better to innovate interactively than to streamline intuitively. We will visualize the capacity of frictionless, innovative mindshare to orchestrate. Do you have a strategy to become six-sigma? Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. Think cross-media. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Imagine a combination of RDF and SMIL. Our technology takes the best features of XML and IIS. We will extend the power of sexy, cross-media, frictionless niches to envisioneer. We understand that it is better to expedite cyber-extensibly than to cultivate cyber-cyber-virally. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed.