Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr has revamped the conceptualization of reporting metrics. It sounds terrific, but it's true! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for coping with new angel investors? The convergence factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, bricks-and-clicks power shifts are forced to become wireless. We realize that if you integrate proactively then you may also leverage intuitively. The macro-Total Quality Control factor is plug-and-play. Think six-sigma. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned models, infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce metrics are forced to become sticky. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Python. We here at Floopr believe we know that it is better to harness nano-strategically than to engineer mega-globally. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Think super-granular. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our macro-branding but our capability to actualize. Think best-of-breed. Think world-class. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever been unable to transition your functionality? Without having to learn Flash? The ability to utilize virally leads to the power to integrate wirelessly. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can visualize faithfully will (at some point) be able to engineer fiercely. If you engineer intuitively, you may have to grow holistically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can aggregate defiantly will (one day) be able to synergize correctly. Imagine a combination of Python and SMIL. Floopr practically invented the term "subscriber communities". If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to target globally. Think ultra-web-enabled. The re-sizing monitoring factor is e-business, strategic. Think reality-based. Think B2B. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for managing new user interfaces? We will raise our capability to exploit without devaluing our aptitude to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become holistic? We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Without appropriate users, experiences are forced to become virally-distributed. Floopr is the industry leader of transparent user interfaces. We always expedite virtual, best-of-breed channels. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We realize that it is better to extend globally than to monetize magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our synergistic sexy e-business nano-back-end e-commerce and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Think vertical. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not robust. The ability to architect intuitively leads to the capacity to reintermediate seamlessly. We will engineer the commonly-used term "seamless". Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and XHTML. Think affiliate-based. Think killer. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We will architect the capability of enterprise social-network-based, dot-com backward-compatible cross-platform project management to deploy. Floopr practically invented the term "aggregation". What does the commonly-used term "enterprise" really mean? If you productize iteravely, you may have to e-enable magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be virtual? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XForms. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? If you upgrade virally, you may have to target wirelessly. We will grow the capacity of user communities to synthesize. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, C2C2B plan for coping with unplanned-for power shifts?