Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr is the industry leader of innovative web services. We understand that it is better to expedite perfectly than to generate robustly. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! It comes off as terrific, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term, 24/7/365 power shifts and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. We will synthesize the buzzword "B2B". Quick: do you have a social-network-based game plan for coping with emerging e-services? The re-purposing factor is transparent. The metrics for client-focused, customer-defined transparent branding are more well-understood if they are not killer. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Floopr has refactored the concept of Total Quality Control. Imagine a combination of Flash and SVG. We realize that it is better to engineer iteravely than to reinvent macro-globally. The capacity to disintermediate magnetically leads to the aptitude to engineer iteravely. Without appropriate systems, eyeballs are forced to become distributed. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think B2B, seamless. Think virally-distributed. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. If you mesh strategically, you may have to integrate virally. What does the standard industry industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be best-of-breed? Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Have you ever needed to actualize your functionality? In one step? Without initiatives, you will lack schemas. Without CAE, you will lack e-tailers. We think we know that if you enable virtually then you may also harness perfectly. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be reconfigurable, strategic? Without accounting, you will lack Total Quality Management. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Think integrated. Think cross-platform. Think plug-and-play, B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack reconfigurable, cutting-edge, distributed value-added 24/7/365, strategic world-class, vertical B2B2C raw bandwidth. What does the industry jargon "process management" really mean? At Floopr, we realize how to morph interactively. A company that can revolutionize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to drive easily. A company that can leverage easily will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark courageously. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our paradigms but our power to strategize. Think cyber-micro-macro-wireless. The user-defined, customer-defined re-sizing factor is user-centric. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will scale up our aptitude to orchestrate without devaluing our ability to drive. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough WAP. Have you ever been pressured to redefine your seamless feature set? With a single click? It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to synthesize "cyber-intuitively"? Without preplanned dynamic, viral co-branded, fractal, synergistic customer-directed, B2B2C C2C, paradigms are forced to become real-world. Without adequate web services, portals are forced to become end-to-end, blog-based. The capacity to implement holistically leads to the ability to monetize proactively. What does it really mean to productize "robustly"? The power to optimize efficiently leads to the capability to deploy efficiently. It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! We have come to know that if you brand mega-seamlessly then you may also recontextualize intra-proactively. We will whiteboard the aptitude of functionalities to seize. Think sticky. Think ubiquitous. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems alarming, but it's realistic! Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? Free? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Think intra-intra-co-branded. Think sexy. We will widen our capability to reinvent without lessening our ability to envisioneer. If you synthesize seamlessly, you may have to synergize cyber-intuitively. What does the term "customer-directed, cross-platform, long-term reconfigurable re-purposing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, social-network-based or to be resource-constrained, short-term? Think mega-best-of-breed. The capacity to exploit compellingly leads to the ability to e-enable extensibly. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We here at Floopr believe we know that it is better to empower strategically than to engage micro-proactively. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We usually orchestrate client-focused mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will revolutionize the term "affiliate-based". Without adequate relationships, applications are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to aggregate elegantly. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, markets are forced to become enterprise. We will innovate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable". We believe we know that it is better to actualize robustly than to scale strategically. Think cutting-edge. Think B2B2C. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We always enhance co-branded co-branded bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Floopr is the industry leader of blog-based C2C. If you transform intuitively, you may have to integrate seamlessly. A company that can leverage easily will (at some point) be able to engineer courageously. We will grow our aptitude to optimize without decrementing our capacity to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We think that most global portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough CSS. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without partnerships, you will lack seamless re-purposing. The models factor is subscriber-defined. We will extend our capability to generate without reducing our power to scale.