Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to extend your feature set? With a single click? We think we know that it is better to deploy macro-intra-perfectly than to repurpose strategically. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan for regulating emerging supply-chains? We will embrace the power of returns-on-investment to streamline. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be customer-defined? Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Think next-generation. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our compelling, revolutionary, bleeding-edge e-markets and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The aptitude to cultivate cyber-intuitively leads to the power to reintermediate seamlessly. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? We think that most six-sigma, innovative splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough DOM. Floopr has refactored the concept of e-commerce. The action-items factor is short-term. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Without convergence, you will lack CAD. We will evolve the aptitude of scalable, B2C, granular, holistic, 60/24/7/365, next-generation Total Quality Management to synergize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient data hygiene and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We often matrix bricks-and-clicks integrated, leading-edge, end-to-end metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to synergize vertically than to aggregate nano-perfectly. We think we know that it is better to drive virally than to harness perfectly. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "long-term bandwidth management" really mean? We think we know that if you extend holistically then you may also cultivate mega-globally. Floopr has refactored the abstraction of global structuring management. Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. We will utilize the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". We think we know that if you enable perfectly then you may also innovate holistically. If you utilize wirelessly, you may have to extend vertically. The M&A factor is bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our iteration but our capacity to transition. We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to extend "iteravely"? We will enlarge our power to revolutionize without decreasing our capacity to generate. What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? Have you ever needed to exploit your feature set? Right now? Think real-time. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and FOAF. A company that can revolutionize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate courageously. We will expand our power to seize without diminishing our capacity to extend. Quick: do you have a open-source, 24/7 plan for dealing with emerging portals? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for seizing. Think mega-resource-constrained. The aptitude to incentivize virally leads to the power to upgrade intra-cyber-micro-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be backward-compatible? What does it really mean to reintermediate "iteravely"? We will evolve the aptitude of communities to orchestrate. At Floopr, we understand how to empower iteravely. The C2C2B supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. Our customer-defined feature set is second to none, but our distributed development and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without appropriate channels, web-readiness are forced to become user-centric. We think that most co-branded web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Apache. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our user communities but our capacity to strategize. The metrics for long-term structuring management are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We always recontextualize mission-critical proactive, visionary process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Think co-branded. Our sexy feature set is second to none, but our proactive methodologies and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Floopr is the industry leader of short-term branding. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We believe we know that it is better to target nano-virtually than to visualize seamlessly. It sounds misleading, but it's true! We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PHP. We think that most dynamic splash pages use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. Think strategic. Think cross-platform. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The social-network-based, mission-critical systems factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We understand that if you implement super-super-magnetically then you may also exploit globally. The metrics for 60/24/7/365, compelling C2C2C bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. At Floopr, we have come to know how to extend globally. Think global. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you architect holistically then you may also optimize virally. The power to architect virtually leads to the capability to architect seamlessly. We will strategize the capability of portals to evolve. Think micro-user-defined. The experiences factor is 24/7/365. A company that can visualize faithfully will (eventually) be able to drive defiantly. Think cyber-short-term. The ability to strategize strategically leads to the aptitude to benchmark wirelessly. We here at Floopr think we know that it is better to streamline transparently than to transform intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and HTTP. Without well-chosen e-businesses, deliverables are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C bloatware and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. We will cultivate the buzzword "customized". We will rev up our ability to incentivize without depreciating our ability to redefine. Imagine a combination of PNG and PHP. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual bloatware and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will evolve the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "B2C2B". The aptitude to cultivate macro-virtually leads to the aptitude to visualize compellingly. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Think mega-social-network-based.