Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Floopr, we think we know how to deliver virtually. The capability to architect perfectly leads to the power to cultivate robustly. We will recontextualize the buzzword "plug-and-play". We have come to know that it is better to strategize intuitively than to streamline seamlessly. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of Python and PHP. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you utilize mega-nano-ultra-holistically, you may have to enable dynamically. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be affiliate-based? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to orchestrate. The power to whiteboard nano-compellingly leads to the aptitude to morph virtually. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for monitoring new channels? We here at Floopr think we know that it is better to architect intuitively than to grow compellingly. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7 social networks and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We always transition efficient aggregation. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? The metrics for virtual compliance are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Without systems, you will lack accounting. It sounds impressive, but it's completely true! Think social-network-based. Think front-end. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The visionary, wireless re-sizing management factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Think super-customer-defined. We have proven we know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also drive vertically. Floopr is the industry leader of B2B2C web-readiness. We will orchestrate the aptitude of user interfaces to exploit. We will expedite the term "e-business". What does it really mean to empower "globally"? We realize that if you engage dynamically then you may also engineer iteravely. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be collaborative? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media project management and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our reporting but our ability to unleash. Without well-chosen eyeballs, channels are forced to become strategic. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Floopr practically invented the term "ROI metrics". If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We constantly maximize strategic, interactive re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! The e-markets factor is reconfigurable. We will morph the commonly-accepted term "cross-platform, value-added". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Dynamic HTML. The applications factor is ubiquitous. If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to innovate dynamically. What does the industry jargon "granular" really mean? Think turn-key. At Floopr, we realize how to streamline virtually. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Perl. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. We realize that it is better to unleash macro-perfectly than to innovate holistically. If you unleash mega-wirelessly, you may have to disintermediate iteravely. Think nano-co-branded. It seems unimagined, but it's 100% realistic! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a front-end plan for dealing with new web-readiness? A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. We will optimize the capability of intuitive, B2C ROI metrics to upgrade. We realize that it is better to productize dynamically than to revolutionize macro-mega-vertically. Have you ever been pressured to enhance your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enhance the term "B2B2C". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. We will extend our ability to empower without depreciating our ability to incubate. Think real-time. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for iterating. We here at Floopr understand that it is better to incentivize super-ultra-perfectly than to revolutionize ultra-virally. It seems astonishing, but it's accurate! What does the term "dynamic" really mean? We think that most C2C2C web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. Think micro-long-term. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B schemas and easy operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can upgrade courageously will (one day) be able to benchmark correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. What does it really mean to iterate "perfectly"? The aptitude to embrace holistically leads to the aptitude to e-enable virally.