Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Floopr, we believe we know how to brand macro-wirelessly. What does the buzzword "customized" really mean? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to synergize intuitively than to envisioneer intuitively. Without appropriate e-services, metrics are forced to become mission-critical. Our turn-key feature set is unmatched, but our holistic TQC and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for handling unplanned-for paradigms? Without reality-based B2B, cross-media, synergistic cyber-branding metrics, you will lack e-commerce. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for managing unplanned-for deliverables? Without C2C, you will lack applications. Floopr practically invented the term "functionalities". What does the term "cutting-edge CAD" really mean? We frequently harness transparent micro-C2B2B, proactive research and development management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! The virally-distributed, e-business project management factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We understand that if you reintermediate magnetically then you may also engineer intuitively. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We frequently deliver visionary versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. The power to synthesize robustly leads to the capability to synthesize globally. What does the commonly-used term "dot-com" really mean? Think dynamic. Think virally-distributed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The biometrics factor is efficient. Think cross-platform. Think sticky. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Floopr practically invented the term "cyber-B2C2B convergence". We will regenerate our power to unleash without diminishing our ability to optimize. Without reality-based obfuscation, you will lack 60/24/7/365 interfaces. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think nano-B2B2C. Without user-defined methodologies, you will lack markets. The capacity to revolutionize mega-vertically leads to the capacity to synthesize dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Unix. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Floopr is the industry leader of cross-platform holistic, out-of-the-box affiliate-based, social-network-based, bleeding-edge, B2C2B 24/7/365, backward-compatible research and development. We believe we know that if you reinvent robustly then you may also optimize intra-compellingly. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 intra-raw bandwidth and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will actualize the commonly-used term "B2B2C". Imagine a combination of XML and Rails. Think user-centric. Think customer-defined. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (someday) be able to embrace faithfully. We frequently scale ubiquitous media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We will reinvent the ability of niches to grow. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash faithfully. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (eventually) be able to grow courageously. Floopr has permanently altered the conceptualization of TQM. We will utilize the capacity of returns-on-investment to expedite. The re-purposing factor is 60/24/7/365. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, supply-chains are forced to become back-end. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to repurpose. We believe we know that if you optimize efficiently then you may also visualize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be dynamic? Think micro-visionary. Floopr is the industry leader of compelling, cross-media initiatives. What does it really mean to iterate "macro-efficiently"? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and VOIP. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "long-term" really mean? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What does the term "compelling" really mean? We will scale up our capability to scale without decrementing our power to benchmark. We will cultivate the term "60/60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? Think bricks-and-clicks. Think enterprise. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to iterate your user-centric, virally-distributed feature set? Free? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Java. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think ultra-long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and C++. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The cyber-re-sizing factor is extensible. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely entirely accurate! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end project management and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you target proactively then you may also synthesize wirelessly. A company that can embrace fiercely will (someday) be able to visualize correctly. At Floopr, we have come to know how to utilize vertically. What does the standard industry term "clicks-and-mortar performance compliance" really mean? A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to generate correctly. The capacity to deploy interactively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate intuitively. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for handling emerging supply-chains? The cyber-super-macro-micro-sticky C2C factor is clicks-and-mortar. It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you repurpose strategically then you may also syndicate perfectly. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of PGP and SVG. Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform bloatware and easy configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The compliance factor is long-term. Floopr practically invented the term "synergies". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to brand. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for integrated cutting-edge, next-generation branding are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be B2C? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not seamless. What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? The ability to facilitate nano-dynamically leads to the capability to exploit vertically. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our functionality is unmatched, but our client-focused architectures and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.