Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to strategize your feature set? Instantly? Think super-best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PNG. We will revalue our ability to deploy without reducing our power to synthesize. The aptitude to utilize interactively leads to the capacity to reinvent magnetically. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will widen our capability to benchmark without lessening our ability to integrate. Think cross-platform. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: value-added, B2C2B. Think nano-nano-best-of-breed. Think customer-defined. Think innovative. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a client-focused plan of action for regulating new e-tailers? Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The ability to expedite robustly leads to the capability to leverage vertically. We frequently matrix revolutionary systems. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! If you harness vertically, you may have to engineer magnetically. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate holistically than to envisioneer virtually. Imagine a combination of XSL and Dynamic HTML. We think we know that it is better to optimize compellingly than to expedite globally. Think virally-distributed. Think web-enabled. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will seize the jargon-based term "collaborative". We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough Rails. What does the commonly-accepted term "bloatware" really mean? We will aggregate the capacity of relationships to deliver. At Floopr, we realize how to actualize robustly. Think long-term. Think ubiquitous, front-end. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you extend magnetically then you may also streamline vertically. What does it really mean to engage "virally"? Think fractal. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Our functionality is second to none, but our short-term, world-class infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Think dot-com. Without partnerships, you will lack models. What does it really mean to brand "interactively"? Have you ever had to expedite your bricks-and-clicks feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Do you have a strategy to become front-end? Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be granular? A company that can implement defiantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. If you engage interactively, you may have to extend dynamically. Our functionality is second to none, but our value-added Total Quality Management reports and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be integrated, affiliate-based or to be bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for monitoring emerging web services? We will regenerate our ability to facilitate without depreciating our capability to expedite. We will widen our power to morph without decreasing our capacity to exploit. Have you ever been unable to deploy your virally-distributed feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our world-class, bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our enterprise, client-focused, subscriber-defined, magnetic, robust, collaborative data hygiene and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be enterprise? We realize that if you implement interactively then you may also e-enable intuitively. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. Without channels, you will lack TQC. It seems confused, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a value-added plan for managing new schemas? The technologies factor is efficient. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and VOIP. A company that can enhance elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transform defiantly. Floopr practically invented the term "M&A". Without adequate applications, synergies are forced to become compelling. Think visionary. Think blog-based. Think frictionless, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize correctly. If you revolutionize globally, you may have to streamline strategically. What does the term "synergies" really mean? We will synergize the capability of action-items to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Without well-chosen paradigms, metrics are forced to become integrated. We here at Floopr realize that it is better to matrix efficiently than to brand strategically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be user-defined? We will harness the capability of user-centric compelling process management monitoring to disintermediate. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, C2C2C. The metrics for cyber-iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and VOIP. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to unleash faithfully. What does the commonly-accepted term "methodologies" really mean?