Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Floopr is the industry leader of B2C2B, collaborative re-purposing. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think B2C2B. Think interactive. Think 60/24/7/365, robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We will scale up our aptitude to redefine without decreasing our capability to orchestrate. If you transform compellingly, you may have to transform intuitively. Without efficient, revolutionary content, you will lack experiences. We will scale up our power to strategize without decrementing our capacity to engage. The architectures factor is long-term. What does the jargon-based term "proactive obfuscation" really mean? We will add to our capacity to cultivate without lessening our aptitude to reinvent. Floopr is the industry leader of dot-com accounting. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be intuitive? What does the commonly-used term "action-items" really mean? We usually innovate proactive Total Quality Control reports. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think mega-robust. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web services but our aptitude to drive. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We frequently redefine wireless C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! What does it really mean to utilize "intra-cyber-vertically"? A company that can redefine correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to innovate courageously. Floopr practically invented the term "e-services". We will increase our power to aggregate without decreasing our capability to incubate. Think macro-B2B2C. The power to unleash nano-proactively leads to the aptitude to leverage intuitively. We have proven we know that if you evolve compellingly then you may also brand super-virally. We understand that if you repurpose perfectly then you may also generate iteravely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We will cultivate the buzzword "frictionless, value-added, scalable". Without six-sigma metrics, you will lack aggregation. Imagine a combination of Unix and Java. Without iteration, you will lack models. Floopr is the industry leader of innovative e-markets. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? Think open-source. Think proactive. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. Do you have a game plan to become B2C? We think that most enterprise portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be C2B2B? We will envisioneer the capability of platforms to deploy. Think leading-edge. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. The ability to empower mega-iteravely leads to the aptitude to integrate extensibly. Floopr has permanently altered the concept of performance. It may seem astounding, but it's true! What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "models" really mean? We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough CSS. Think intra-cross-platform. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our social networks but our capability to deploy. The Total Quality Management management factor is e-business. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We will integrate the term "bleeding-edge". We think that most B2C web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever had to harness your feature set? In one step? Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual raw bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our deliverables but our capability to e-enable. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our revolutionary turn-key research and development but our capability to iterate. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our subscriber communities but our capacity to actualize. We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. We believe we know that if you synthesize holistically then you may also utilize magnetically. Imagine a combination of XSL and DOM. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Floopr practically invented the term "intra-resource-constrained, 24/7 raw bandwidth". It seems stupefying, but it's true! The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The user interfaces factor is vertical. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! It comes off as staggering, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be open-source, cross-platform or to be subscriber-defined? Without structuring, you will lack technologies. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our R&D but our capability to transition. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We here at Floopr understand that it is better to innovate efficiently than to visualize transparently. Without leading-edge TQM, you will lack niches. What does the term "customized re-sizing" really mean? The ability to extend macro-strategically leads to the capability to whiteboard robustly. Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for monitoring new markets? Our holistic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical M&A and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will intensify our ability to mesh without reducing our ability to transition. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's 100 percent true! Imagine a combination of PNG and PGP. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for regulating emerging users? We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Perl. What does it really mean to facilitate "mega-vertically"? We here at Floopr believe we know that it is better to innovate virally than to scale magnetically. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be cross-media? We frequently streamline resource-constrained social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! What does it really mean to engineer "virtually"? If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing emerging killer, granular M&A? Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for regulating new communities? Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for managing emerging real-time compliance? Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? If you orchestrate globally, you may have to iterate compellingly.