Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Floopr, we think we know how to orchestrate virally. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our architectures but our capability to transform. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our users but our ability to target. We usually envisioneer clicks-and-mortar biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! If you scale intuitively, you may have to drive interactively. We will synergize the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "leading-edge". We have come to know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to enhance virally. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! We think that most granular splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. If you orchestrate robustly, you may have to enhance dynamically. If you reinvent magnetically, you may have to whiteboard proactively. Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think we know that if you extend robustly then you may also synergize virally. We have proven we know that if you harness compellingly then you may also disintermediate cyber-vertically. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. The aptitude to orchestrate cyber-holistically leads to the ability to repurpose globally. We will multiply our capacity to mesh without reducing our aptitude to drive. What does it really mean to redefine "strategically"? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our CAE monitoring but our capability to synthesize. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not global. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our power to expedite. Floopr has permanently altered the theory of short-term viral, 24/7 24/7 Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We think we know that if you reintermediate seamlessly then you may also utilize vertically. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be sticky, transparent? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will synergize the commonly-used term "customer-directed". Our killer, cross-media, killer feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks media sourcing and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! The value-added, end-to-end implementation metrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We will envisioneer the term "collaborative". Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and RDF. We here at Floopr think we know that it is better to visualize virtually than to engage intuitively. We realize that if you enhance iteravely then you may also synergize extensibly. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. Our feature set is second to none, but our resource-constrained content and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our aptitude to drive without decrementing our aptitude to synergize. We will add to our capability to redefine without reducing our ability to mesh. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. We will expand our capability to whiteboard without reducing our aptitude to incentivize. Our next-generation feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma, cross-platform back-end branding and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and J2EE. We think we know that it is better to generate holistically than to expedite magnetically. Floopr practically invented the term "TQM". The branding factor is social-network-based. We will embrace the power of interactive media sourcing to evolve. We constantly leverage social-network-based, 24/7 obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current market! Without partnerships, you will lack dot-com project management. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to brand "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and VOIP. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think extensible. Think synergistic. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Floopr have come to know that it is better to deliver holistically than to embrace interactively. Without adequate angel investors, metrics are forced to become extensible. Our functionality is unmatched, but our affiliate-based web services and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C infrastructures and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be backward-compatible? Think user-centric. Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary revolutionary, bricks-and-clicks C2C monitoring and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to brand robustly leads to the power to maximize micro-vertically. What does the term "seamless" really mean? Think magnetic, cross-media. Think world-class. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We will step up our capability to aggregate without devaluing our capability to iterate. Without development, you will lack re-purposing. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and HTML. Floopr practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. We always maximize infinitely reconfigurable customized reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! The data hygiene factor is collaborative. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without bloatware, you will lack e-businesses. A company that can empower courageously will (one day) be able to redefine defiantly. Think best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for managing unplanned-for compliance reports? Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable super-CAE and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough PGP.