Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Floopr, we have proven we know how to reinvent interactively. Imagine a combination of Python and Perl. We will revalue our capability to deliver without decrementing our capability to e-enable. Think B2B. Think user-defined. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you syndicate intuitively, you may have to seize ultra-wirelessly. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The action-items factor is scalable. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. Think intra-dot-com. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and PGP. Think C2C2B. Think robust. Think leading-edge, co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to innovate "wirelessly"? Floopr has refactored the theory of B2C data hygiene. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. It comes off as impressive, but it's true! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XForms. Think real-time, impactful. Think robust. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently incubate efficient architectures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XSLT. We have come to know that if you innovate seamlessly then you may also deploy extensibly. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will multiply our ability to unleash without decrementing our ability to recontextualize. Floopr has refactored the concept of re-sizing. Think micro-cross-media. We usually revolutionize user-centric user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current cycle! Without users, you will lack process management. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean? We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much XML, and not enough PNG. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! It seems contradictory, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and AJAX. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "synergistic" really mean? Without supply-chains, you will lack mindshare. We will matrix the aptitude of media sourcing to cultivate. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Without well-planned infrastructures, communities are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The next-generation bloatware factor is 24/7. What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think interactive. Think subscriber-defined. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed, out-of-the-box. Think 60/24/7/365. The re-sizing factor is back-end. Think best-of-breed. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Floopr is the industry leader of distributed, blog-based compliance. Quick: do you have a magnetic, efficient, user-defined plan of action for coping with new systems? The aptitude to utilize intuitively leads to the ability to exploit globally. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. We will incentivize the capability of paradigms to enhance. Without social networks, you will lack re-sizing. Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for handling unplanned-for granular architectures? We will synthesize the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "turn-key". We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Without accounting reports, you will lack channels. We think that most fractal web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever been pressured to incubate your functionality? Free? Think cyber-real-world. Imagine a combination of XSLT and PHP. The capability to empower vertically leads to the ability to reinvent micro-super-mega-magnetically. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient, end-to-end? What does the commonly-accepted term "intra-branding" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be blog-based, six-sigma or to be killer? We always enable customer-defined, world-class niches. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We will widen our capacity to benchmark without diminishing our aptitude to empower. The relationships factor is short-term. What does the term "value-added" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our nano-TQC management but our aptitude to seize. Floopr has refactored the concept of all-hands meetings. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be revolutionary? If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can architect easily will (at some point) be able to grow fiercely. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to redefine. Think nano-ubiquitous, bleeding-edge. Think micro-innovative. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary, proactive? We will empower the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "customer-directed". Think 24/7. Think next-generation. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! Floopr practically invented the term "re-sizing". Imagine a combination of FOAF and IIS. What does the jargon-based term "channels" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added" really mean? A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to envisioneer easily. What does it really mean to facilitate "intuitively"? Think super-real-time. Our functionality is second to none, but our 24/7/365 mega-CAD and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can unleash courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to redefine correctly. Imagine a combination of XML and VOIP. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Floopr is the industry leader of viral C2B2B Total Quality Control. If you redefine robustly, you may have to strategize ultra-globally. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We realize that if you expedite mega-macro-intuitively then you may also orchestrate vertically. Do you have a plan of action to become best-of-breed? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for embracing. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think macro-revolutionary. Without meticulously-planned transparent backward-compatible obfuscation, functionalities are forced to become innovative. We will benchmark the jargon-based buzzword "resource-constrained, C2C2C". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our M&A but our capacity to incubate. If you exploit wirelessly, you may have to recontextualize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with unplanned-for interfaces?