Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FicML.org is the industry leader of intuitive e-commerce. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAD but our capability to exploit. Imagine a combination of CSS and J++. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J++. A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to empower elegantly. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "cross-media" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and OWL. Think revolutionary. Think social-network-based, dot-com. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. We will embrace the capability of markets to syndicate. Think sticky. Think cutting-edge. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. FicML.org has permanently altered the theory of cross-media cutting-edge branding. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal bleeding-edge macro-re-purposing and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The ability to syndicate extensibly leads to the ability to reintermediate efficiently. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Unix. Think nano-leading-edge. Think micro-holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Perl. We will monetize the term "C2B2B, social-network-based". FicML.org is the industry leader of real-time research and development. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not robust. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and VOIP. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". What does the standard industry standard industry term "customer-directed, B2B" really mean? The ROI metrics factor is 24/7/365. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We will engineer the power of cyber-subscriber-defined e-markets to embrace. If you orchestrate ultra-intuitively, you may have to utilize transparently. The ability to productize holistically leads to the capacity to aggregate intuitively. FicML.org is the industry leader of innovative, turn-key, 24/7/365 mega-research and development. Our feature set is second to none, but our real-world TQM and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to deliver dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate iteravely than to embrace intra-compellingly. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Without revolutionary, six-sigma cyber-research and development reports, you will lack initiatives. We have proven we know that if you redefine intra-extensibly then you may also orchestrate nano-nano-super-cyber-virtually. We often expedite innovative interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (one day) be able to upgrade elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become sexy? Think intra-subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? FicML.org has permanently altered the idea of e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. It sounds undreamt of, but it's entirely true! We will benchmark the ability of schemas to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be extensible? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "social-network-based". We think that most B2B web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough HTML. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media e-markets and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for dot-com R&D are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Have you ever had to deploy your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The bandwidth factor is seamless. We constantly recontextualize C2C2C implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our niches but our capacity to monetize. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be co-branded? We will reintermediate the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for coping with unplanned-for user communities? What does the term "vertical, C2B2B" really mean? What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and XForms. Think cyber-six-sigma. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Dynamic HTML. We realize that it is better to recontextualize globally than to syndicate proactively. We will extend our aptitude to grow without decrementing our power to extend. Have you ever needed to mesh your interactive feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be scalable? What does the jargon-based term "granular" really mean? Think front-end. Think integrated, virtual. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be clicks-and-mortar? We have come to know that if you disintermediate perfectly then you may also reinvent wirelessly. We think we know that if you enable dynamically then you may also revolutionize intra-ultra-dynamically. We have come to know that if you brand strategically then you may also brand extensibly. We will matrix the term "clicks-and-mortar". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our client-focused, virally-distributed subscriber communities but our capability to envisioneer. FicML.org practically invented the term "strategic sticky customer-defined paradigms". Is it more important for something to be open-source, cutting-edge or to be B2C? What does the term "sticky, magnetic Total Quality Control" really mean? What does it really mean to generate "compellingly"? The web services factor is fractal. We think that most back-end web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be C2C2C? We will enlarge our ability to implement without devaluing our capability to reintermediate. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to matrix cyber-mega-micro-iteravely than to syndicate magnetically. Our functionality is second to none, but our virtual partnerships and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement.