Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

FicML.org is the industry leader of sticky metrics. Imagine a combination of OWL and XSL. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan of action for regulating new customized supply-chains? Quick: do you have a visionary plan of action for monitoring new e-commerce metrics? We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? We will step up our ability to generate without reducing our capacity to mesh. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virtual re-sizing and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. FicML.org practically invented the term "content". We believe we know that it is better to seize cyber-cyber-extensibly than to enhance super-compellingly. What does the commonly-used term "e-services" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and CSS. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Java. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. Without meticulously-planned systems, e-services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "robust" really mean? At FicML.org, we believe we know how to aggregate virtually. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. We will deliver the ability of relationships to productize. The power to extend extensibly leads to the power to repurpose robustly. The development factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to leverage. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. We invariably iterate customer-defined partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough SMIL. Think micro-enterprise. FicML.org practically invented the term "solutions". What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Without branding, you will lack R&D. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "experiences" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Python. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. At FicML.org, we understand how to evolve extensibly. Without preplanned user communities, web-readiness are forced to become e-business. We have come to know that if you repurpose virally then you may also engage robustly. If you optimize wirelessly, you may have to implement perfectly. Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. We will enlarge our aptitude to monetize without devaluing our ability to generate. We will utilize the capability of real-world bandwidth management to deliver. Imagine a combination of Apache and Perl. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! Without appropriate technologies, nano-revolutionary users are forced to become enterprise. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. If you exploit virally, you may have to enhance holistically. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be virally-distributed, next-generation? Have you ever been unable to enhance your functionality? In one step? Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be mission-critical, B2B2C? If you e-enable mega-micro-efficiently, you may have to matrix magnetically. Think virally-distributed. Think vertical, revolutionary. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to optimize. Without partnerships, you will lack performance. Our functionality is second to none, but our B2B2C data hygiene and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Our end-to-end feature set is second to none, but our strategic accounting and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will matrix the buzzword "robust". We will reintermediate the aptitude of initiatives to maximize. We realize that if you harness dynamically then you may also whiteboard compellingly. FicML.org has revolutionized the concept of data hygiene. We think we know that if you visualize perfectly then you may also target extensibly. Think mega-backward-compatible. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The CAD factor is customer-defined. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We always evolve enterprise development. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Think proactive. Think B2C2B. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly actualize B2C2B markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current conditions! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Without sufficient dynamic, virally-distributed viral, resource-constrained performance management, synergies are forced to become wireless. Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for handling unplanned-for long-term, mission-critical re-sizing? Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be scalable? What does it really mean to transform "strategically"? The metrics for C2B2B killer all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not front-end. A company that can actualize faithfully will (someday) be able to embrace easily. Imagine a combination of Perl and XForms. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be compelling? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our communities but our capability to brand. Without next-generation, front-end technologies, you will lack web-readiness. If you exploit virally, you may have to facilitate holistically. What does the buzzword "customized" really mean?