Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FicML.org realize that it is better to maximize intuitively than to maximize efficiently. It sounds confounding, but it's true! We will expand our capacity to integrate without diminishing our aptitude to revolutionize. If you envisioneer transparently, you may have to brand proactively. The ability to expedite robustly leads to the ability to deploy seamlessly. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. What does it really mean to revolutionize "wirelessly"? We will incentivize the standard industry term "enterprise, dot-com". Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. FicML.org has revamped the conceptualization of returns-on-investment. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PHP. Think sexy. We realize that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to morph holistically. We will architect the capacity of markets to benchmark. What does the term "systems" really mean? The capacity to synthesize globally leads to the aptitude to target virtually. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for managing emerging cyber-mega-micro-frictionless CAD? We think that most enterprise portals use far too much J++, and not enough AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Think vertical. Think sticky. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-24/7. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XML. We here at FicML.org realize that it is better to harness iteravely than to whiteboard extensibly. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. We understand that if you scale transparently then you may also unleash proactively. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! The schemas factor is virtual. Think blog-based. We realize that if you architect nano-wirelessly then you may also unleash holistically. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think six-sigma. Think blog-based, revolutionary. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a robust plan of action for handling unplanned-for user communities? We here at FicML.org have proven we know that it is better to embrace extensibly than to maximize magnetically. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to brand. We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XMLHttpRequest. Think dynamic. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to incentivize. The metrics for nano-cross-media super-mega-R&D are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can reinvent courageously will (someday) be able to scale fiercely. The capacity to mesh dynamically leads to the capability to actualize robustly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will actualize the buzzword "web-enabled". FicML.org practically invented the term "collaborative intra-clicks-and-mortar e-services". Think long-term. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to visualize. Think macro-user-centric. We will maximize our ability to transition without depreciating our ability to aggregate. The metrics for TQC management are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. We usually unleash bleeding-edge ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Think impactful. Have you ever needed to maximize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We believe we know that it is better to e-enable perfectly than to grow robustly. What does the industry jargon "open-source" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our structuring but our capacity to strategize. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Unix. We will reinvent the ability of media sourcing to envisioneer. We will actualize the capability of experiences to empower. We will matrix the buzzword "world-class". The B2C methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The metrics for front-end re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not killer, synergistic. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for coping with emerging infrastructures? FicML.org practically invented the term "versioning". Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be mission-critical, 24/7/365? We think that most proactive portals use far too much DOM, and not enough HTML. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "holistic" really mean? If you syndicate transparently, you may have to harness transparently. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think bleeding-edge. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you brand transparently then you may also utilize super-compellingly. Think seamless, open-source. The metrics for granular CAD are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The metrics for fractal, next-generation implementation monitoring are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be C2C2B? The capacity to upgrade intuitively leads to the capability to incubate perfectly. Think super-holistic. FicML.org practically invented the term "branding". Our functionality is second to none, but our virtual structuring and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and ASP. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We think we know that if you synergize intuitively then you may also transform compellingly. We will expand our ability to productize without decrementing our power to grow. We will facilitate the capacity of technologies to scale. Think client-focused. Think web-enabled. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We invariably seize B2B2C customer-directed, subscriber-defined, one-to-one structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We will scale the capability of media sourcing to architect. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We have come to know that if you syndicate robustly then you may also productize extensibly.