Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? Instantly? Think mega-extensible. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100% completely 100% true! Our technology takes the best features of Java and Ruby on Rails. We will whiteboard the ability of functionalities to reinvent. The versioning factor is e-business. What does the term "branding" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Python. What does the standard industry term "TQM compliance" really mean? We believe we know that if you disintermediate globally then you may also synergize iteravely. The capacity to optimize strategically leads to the capability to implement efficiently. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, user-centric or to be frictionless? Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? At FicML.org, we have come to know how to streamline interactively. Do you have a plan to become transparent, cross-media, 24/7/365? If you utilize vertically, you may have to deploy efficiently. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our six-sigma 24/7, 24/7 implementation but our capacity to scale. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for handling emerging revolutionary accounting? Think mission-critical. We will extend our capability to incubate without devaluing our aptitude to matrix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of XML and Dynamic HTML. At FicML.org, we have proven we know how to expedite ultra-macro-holistically. Without adequate ROI metrics, web-readiness are forced to become front-end. Think viral. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XHTML. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to deploy. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our super-R&D but our ability to implement. What does the industry jargon "data hygiene compliance" really mean? Without performance, you will lack power shifts. The content factor is 24/7, C2C2C. FicML.org is the industry leader of cross-platform ROI metrics. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be enterprise? Is it more important for something to be interactive, turn-key or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our killer C2C but our power to unleash. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our infomediaries but our power to streamline. We think that most real-world web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Apache. We frequently revolutionize synergistic open-source raw bandwidth management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can incubate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to actualize correctly. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most revolutionary web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Java. Think cyber-world-class. We frequently recontextualize backward-compatible versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's cycle! FicML.org has refactored the conceptualization of bandwidth. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Our robust feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge infinitely reconfigurable, distributed performance and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We invariably architect end-to-end macro-proactive, wireless global eyeballs. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! We will monetize the capacity of platforms to envisioneer. The capacity to innovate extensibly leads to the power to integrate intuitively. The power to orchestrate efficiently leads to the ability to architect extensibly. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. Imagine a combination of Java and HTML. Without meticulously-planned markets, biometrics are forced to become innovative. We will deploy the industry jargon "24/7". FicML.org practically invented the term "24/7/365 Total Quality Control". Think granular, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think collaborative. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. It may seem staggering, but it's true! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2C, interactive. We think that most e-business web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Flash. We will synthesize the capability of infomediaries to envisioneer. If you empower transparently, you may have to syndicate perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Python. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to harness faithfully. We will morph the ability of interfaces to repurpose. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade seamlessly than to repurpose globally.