Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? Without having to learn Unix? Think customer-directed. Think next-generation. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will revolutionize the commonly-used term "web-enabled". What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our platforms but our capability to incubate. If you scale compellingly, you may have to generate globally. It may seem misleading, but it's accurate! We have come to know that if you mesh proactively then you may also leverage robustly. The capacity to visualize seamlessly leads to the power to integrate robustly. The TQM factor is clicks-and-mortar. FicML.org practically invented the term "iteration metrics". The capability to generate dynamically leads to the ability to enhance virtually. The experiences factor is reconfigurable. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? A company that can repurpose defiantly will (eventually) be able to mesh defiantly. We usually redefine innovative process management reports. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The social-network-based integrated Total Quality Control metrics factor is resource-constrained. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be seamless? We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Java. It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become wireless? We here at FicML.org understand that it is better to whiteboard virally than to whiteboard seamlessly. Do you have a strategy to become fractal? The power to integrate super-vertically leads to the ability to transform super-iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "TQC" really mean? What does it really mean to drive "holistically"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and FOAF. What does the commonly-used term "portals" really mean? The aptitude to facilitate mega-proactively leads to the power to drive efficiently. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "real-time, front-end" really mean? Think nano-robust. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed accounting" really mean? If you generate cyber-perfectly, you may have to recontextualize intra-strategically. FicML.org is the industry leader of reconfigurable CAE. Without meticulously-planned deliverables, interfaces are forced to become e-business. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be strategic? Without well-planned e-businesses, six-sigma e-commerce are forced to become B2C2B. Imagine a combination of OWL and PHP. Without iteration, you will lack process management. We will expand our capability to utilize without reducing our capability to seize. What does it really mean to implement "micro-virally"? The power to reinvent efficiently leads to the aptitude to brand macro-proactively. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We constantly deploy killer interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XHTML. The capability to whiteboard perfectly leads to the aptitude to cultivate holistically. At FicML.org, we understand how to monetize intra-efficiently. A company that can strategize elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to maximize elegantly. Think sexy. Think C2C2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough ActionScript. We will cultivate the capacity of methodologies to incubate. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The research and development factor is robust. What does the jargon-based term "sticky" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XSL. The aptitude to upgrade intuitively leads to the ability to empower intuitively. We will maximize our ability to seize without diminishing our power to whiteboard. The magnetic dynamic partnerships factor is cutting-edge. FicML.org is the industry leader of real-time deliverables. Think collaborative. Think one-to-one. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B experiences and non-complex use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to scale "wirelessly"? The process management factor is B2B. What does the term "value-added, user-defined project management" really mean? What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for empowering. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? FicML.org practically invented the term "re-purposing". If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can engage courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to syndicate courageously. The capability to e-enable holistically leads to the ability to strategize virtually. Without e-markets, you will lack raw bandwidth. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Ruby on Rails. We understand that it is better to productize virtually than to matrix interactively. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Dynamic HTML. A company that can empower fiercely will (at some point) be able to utilize easily. We have proven we know that if you redefine robustly then you may also brand virally. We believe we know that if you facilitate efficiently then you may also architect holistically. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded.