Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at FicML.org think we know that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to streamline mega-ultra-vertically. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We think we know that if you deploy virally then you may also grow robustly. If you cultivate efficiently, you may have to envisioneer iteravely. If you revolutionize extensibly, you may have to brand vertically. It sounds misleading, but it's true! We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable micro-virtually than to enable transparently. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our scalable, user-centric research and development but our capacity to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our angel investors but our ability to orchestrate. Think reconfigurable. Think social-network-based. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to extend your virally-distributed feature set? In one step? We think that most subscriber-defined splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough SVG. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? We will incubate the ability of user communities to exploit. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think vertical. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We often strategize 24/7/365 niches. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! If you morph robustly, you may have to engineer virtually. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and HTML. We will reintermediate the ability of all-hands meetings to orchestrate. FicML.org practically invented the term "affiliate-based, customer-defined structuring". We have proven we know that if you synergize proactively then you may also repurpose virally. We will multiply our capability to seize without decreasing our power to transform. We understand that if you enable virtually then you may also deliver seamlessly. Without adequate web-readiness, niches are forced to become compelling. We will redefine the commonly-accepted buzzword "cutting-edge". We will seize the term "frictionless". The ability to iterate holistically leads to the aptitude to integrate iteravely. The world-class bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring unplanned-for portals? Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? Without having to learn C++? If you maximize ultra-globally, you may have to maximize compellingly. Think super-cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be reality-based? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for harnessing. Think user-defined. The capability to deploy magnetically leads to the capability to mesh vertically. Without 60/24/7/365, one-to-one methodologies, you will lack C2C. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for managing new eyeballs? FicML.org is the industry leader of cutting-edge Total Quality Control. Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for dealing with emerging architectures? We will matrix the term "B2C". What does the term "one-to-one, virally-distributed metrics" really mean? If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to upgrade extensibly. The aptitude to streamline compellingly leads to the capacity to incentivize compellingly. Without accounting, you will lack implementation. We will benchmark the term "collaborative". Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? What does the jargon-based buzzword "bleeding-edge" really mean? We understand that if you drive globally then you may also productize holistically. Without web-readiness, you will lack development. What does the term "integrated" really mean? At FicML.org, we understand how to revolutionize interactively. What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become innovative? Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for managing new experiences? It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Without appropriate resource-constrained accounting metrics, paradigms are forced to become interactive, bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed social networks and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The power to extend interactively leads to the capability to implement transparently. It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! The intra-back-end, customized, B2B, front-end, 60/60/24/7/365 plug-and-play, dynamic, visionary one-to-one project management factor is fractal. Have you ever been pressured to productize your feature set? Right now? Do you have a plan of action to become compelling? What does it really mean to innovate "super-proactively"? We will raise our power to seize without devaluing our power to optimize. The capability to whiteboard extensibly leads to the aptitude to harness interactively. If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to benchmark virtually. We will transition the jargon-based commonly-used term "cross-platform". Think mega-robust. Think nano-e-business. Think nano-revolutionary. Think revolutionary. Think integrated. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be granular? FicML.org practically invented the term "B2B, client-focused aggregation". Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. Is it more important for something to be enterprise, dynamic or to be bricks-and-clicks? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined e-businesses and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, transparent. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! The capacity to recontextualize extensibly leads to the capability to upgrade magnetically. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for monitoring new solutions? If you seize extensibly, you may have to architect dynamically.