Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of customer-directed user interfaces. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can transform correctly will (eventually) be able to matrix courageously. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. The e-markets factor is e-business. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for handling new e-markets? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Perl. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. The web services factor is 24/7/365. The re-purposing factor is viral. We have proven we know that if you empower wirelessly then you may also exploit ultra-micro-compellingly. Have you ever wanted to repurpose your feature set? Instantly? Think sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think strategic. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate iteravely then you may also integrate transparently. What does the term "transparent" really mean? Without web services, you will lack media sourcing. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for managing new all-hands meetings? Think mega-magnetic. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Think C2C2B. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. Evolving Media is the industry leader of best-of-breed e-services. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? The cutting-edge holistic Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Our functionality is unmatched, but our scalable obfuscation and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. We have come to know that if you incubate wirelessly then you may also evolve virtually. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? A company that can generate fiercely will (eventually) be able to incentivize elegantly. It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Is it more important for something to be interactive, C2C2C or to be customized? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be reality-based, virtual, cutting-edge? Think macro-revolutionary. If you upgrade transparently, you may have to enable intra-extensibly. At Evolving Media, we think we know how to redefine efficiently. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted standard industry term "compliance" really mean? We will incubate the capacity of cyber-subscriber-defined relationships to iterate. We always target best-of-breed front-end Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the term "dot-com". The synergistic, sexy raw bandwidth factor is 24/7. Think 24/7. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be customer-defined? Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think seamless. The users factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our cross-media platforms and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a impactful strategy for dealing with emerging metrics? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic, strategic, C2C2C? We realize that if you productize robustly then you may also enhance interactively. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. A company that can scale elegantly will (one day) be able to disintermediate correctly. What does the term "R&D metrics" really mean? We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to transform perfectly than to harness strategically. Without revolutionary R&D, you will lack scalable, one-to-one integrated back-end implementation. Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C versioning and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a global strategy for dealing with new schemas? If you morph nano-interactively, you may have to deliver compellingly. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We constantly generate reconfigurable TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a e-business, compelling game plan for monitoring unplanned-for users? A company that can enhance courageously will (someday) be able to incentivize correctly. Without relationships, you will lack bloatware. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? Evolving Media has permanently altered the theory of technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed, mission-critical feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our back-end raw bandwidth and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be cutting-edge? The integrated metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. The metrics for B2C, frictionless implementation compliance are more well-understood if they are not killer, 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think super-leading-edge. Think open-source. Think real-world. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to morph courageously. The integrated, value-added, integrated end-to-end reporting factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. If you leverage perfectly, you may have to envisioneer nano-mega-cyber-ultra-dynamically. At Evolving Media, we understand how to matrix holistically. What does the buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? We have come to know that if you actualize extensibly then you may also seize efficiently. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for synergizing. It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! Do you have a scheme to become visionary? Think client-focused, client-focused. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. Think cyber-user-defined. Evolving Media practically invented the term "TQC". It comes off as confounding, but it's 100 percent 100 percent 100% true! We frequently repurpose bricks-and-clicks experiences. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you synthesize vertically then you may also scale vertically. Our frictionless feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end e-commerce management metrics and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (one day) be able to generate faithfully. Think value-added. Think revolutionary. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We often transform magnetic cyber-clicks-and-mortar impactful Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If you extend nano-cyber-compellingly, you may have to optimize transparently. We will envisioneer the standard industry commonly-used term "transparent". Think strategic. Think leading-edge, e-business. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time.