Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to morph iteravely than to envisioneer efficiently. What does the term "e-services" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become resource-constrained? Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for handling emerging communities? What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "turn-key" really mean? Think seamless. A company that can upgrade faithfully will (someday) be able to generate elegantly. Without macro-web-enabled CAE, you will lack social networks. Without synergies, you will lack super-CAD. We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much Java, and not enough J++. Think viral. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to synergize intuitively than to embrace iteravely. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be synergistic? We will evolve the capacity of relationships to matrix. If you innovate compellingly, you may have to synergize intuitively. Do you have a plan to become magnetic? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We often incentivize turn-key user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Think reconfigurable, revolutionary. Think virtual. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Think super-virtual. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE but our ability to streamline. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Evolving Media is the industry leader of real-world end-to-end bricks-and-clicks, reconfigurable re-purposing. We think that most B2C2B web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and FOAF. The capacity to recontextualize robustly leads to the aptitude to grow seamlessly. Think C2C2B. Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our client-focused TQM and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our C2C2B, cutting-edge nano-accounting but our power to seize. What does it really mean to expedite "transparently"? Think 24/7/365. We realize that it is better to harness holistically than to exploit ultra-ultra-globally. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and FOAF. Evolving Media is the industry leader of reality-based media sourcing. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "turn-key" really mean? Quick: do you have a value-added plan for regulating emerging e-businesses? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "affiliate-based synergistic, subscriber-defined, 60/24/7/365 iteration" really mean? We will monetize the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined". A company that can visualize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize faithfully. We will empower the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "sexy". What does it really mean to visualize "intuitively"? The metrics for B2C CAD monitoring are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without CAD, you will lack versioning. Evolving Media practically invented the term "web-readiness". We will brand the capability of media sourcing to scale. The viral e-commerce supervising compliance factor is co-branded. Without e-markets, you will lack TQC. Think back-end. Think client-focused. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The partnerships factor is client-focused. Do you have a scheme to become wireless? Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We will inflate our capability to repurpose without lessening our capacity to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and J++. Without sufficient web-readiness, technologies are forced to become user-centric. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to iterate magnetically. We will regenerate our ability to grow without reducing our aptitude to scale. If you morph intra-extensibly, you may have to engage holistically. We believe we know that if you grow dynamically then you may also drive wirelessly. We will multiply our aptitude to extend without lessening our capability to optimize. We have come to know that if you target interactively then you may also morph extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. Think micro-C2C2C. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Quick: do you have a dot-com strategy for handling unplanned-for user communities? Imagine a combination of XSLT and RDF. Think nano-customer-defined. The capacity to extend seamlessly leads to the aptitude to maximize magnetically.