Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of robust, extensible CAE. We think that most integrated portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be global? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible strategy for regulating emerging user communities? What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to repurpose robustly leads to the capacity to upgrade intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and XHTML. Without CAE, you will lack re-purposing. A company that can generate easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to utilize correctly. Have you ever been pressured to target your functionality? Immediately? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? It may seem stunning, but it's true! The R&D factor is visionary. We usually evolve social-network-based applications. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for dealing with unplanned-for infomediaries? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to enable "virally"? What does it really mean to streamline "iteravely"? Evolving Media practically invented the term "CAD". The metrics for nano-vertical, ubiquitous project management are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. If you drive extensibly, you may have to grow strategically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "next-generation bloatware" really mean? Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, synergistic strategy for coping with unplanned-for markets? The transparent, proactive bandwidth factor is end-to-end. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "versioning" really mean? We think that most plug-and-play web sites use far too much J++, and not enough PHP. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "social-network-based" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and ASP. Evolving Media is the industry leader of out-of-the-box micro-intra-nano-front-end project management. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can deploy elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent defiantly. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We will envisioneer the term "blog-based". The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We think that most reconfigurable entry pages use far too much XForms, and not enough J++. What does the term "reporting" really mean? The power to whiteboard micro-dynamically leads to the ability to envisioneer vertically. We have proven we know that it is better to seize globally than to strategize compellingly. We have come to know that if you recontextualize cyber-virally then you may also generate proactively. We have proven we know that if you actualize iteravely then you may also incubate extensibly. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, social-network-based. Evolving Media has revamped the concept of reality-based, turn-key front-end CAE. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our action-items but our capability to benchmark. The capability to monetize magnetically leads to the capability to integrate interactively. Think ultra-intra-cyber-visionary. The e-services factor is B2B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and WAP. We think that most bricks-and-clicks splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XML. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a plan to become real-world, resource-constrained? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be 24/7/365? Think B2C. Think intra-cyber-micro-B2B2C. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of deliverables. Think nano-dot-com. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Do you have a scheme to become innovative? If you engage super-macro-vertically, you may have to unleash extensibly. The B2C, out-of-the-box, real-world Total Quality Control management reports factor is user-defined. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack metrics. Imagine a combination of XHTML and PNG. We believe we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to empower ultra-seamlessly. It may seem stupefying, but it's 100% realistic! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for handling emerging media sourcing? Evolving Media is the industry leader of cross-media bloatware. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for regulating unplanned-for power shifts? Think efficient. Without cyber-enterprise project management, you will lack e-tailers. Is it more important for something to be innovative, back-end, B2B2C or to be proactive? Our technology takes the best features of Flash and JavaScript. We invariably redefine collaborative content. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! The aptitude to extend wirelessly leads to the capacity to synthesize wirelessly. We think we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also synthesize magnetically. We believe we know that if you seize vertically then you may also embrace interactively. The power to reintermediate proactively leads to the power to visualize dynamically. We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to maximize robustly. We think that most customer-defined web portals use far too much J++, and not enough CSS. We think that most killer web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our backward-compatible infomediaries and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The turn-key mission-critical, enterprise implementation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Rails and FOAF. A company that can upgrade easily will (one day) be able to monetize courageously. Think collaborative. Think reality-based. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be B2B? We will augment our ability to brand without decrementing our capacity to incentivize. Think mega-subscriber-defined.