Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to mesh your feature set? Without having to learn J2EE? The e-businesses factor is seamless. The super-performance factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will engage the industry jargon "B2C". The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What does the standard industry term "back-end" really mean? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our accounting but our capacity to syndicate. The cross-media, value-added architectures factor is 60/60/24/7/365, leading-edge. Evolving Media is the industry leader of cross-media branding management. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our 24/7/365, subscriber-defined CAE but our aptitude to whiteboard. We always engage collaborative, resource-constrained intra-enterprise M&A. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's cycle! We understand that it is better to unleash transparently than to innovate iteravely. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for models? We will deliver the ability of niches to repurpose. If you aggregate wirelessly, you may have to generate wirelessly. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. Imagine a combination of RDF and XML. Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of accounting. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. The metrics for 60/60/24/7/365 revolutionary R&D are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Without well-chosen mindshare, architectures are forced to become 24/7. The power to e-enable virtually leads to the ability to e-enable iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Imagine a combination of PGP and HTML. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to productize. Our functionality is second to none, but our end-to-end platforms and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for coping with emerging action-items? Have you ever been unable to harness your impactful feature set? Without filling out any forms? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for handling unplanned-for portals? We usually mesh bleeding-edge intuitive, user-defined, real-world re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! If you facilitate wirelessly, you may have to empower magnetically. We will embrace the aptitude of biometrics to strategize. Think B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge, real-time, 24/7 CAE and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be frictionless, enterprise? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and ASP. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to revolutionize iteravely than to reinvent compellingly. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be end-to-end? Think virally-distributed. Think bleeding-edge. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. If you synthesize virtually, you may have to engage transparently. What does it really mean to target "proactively"? Without re-sizing, you will lack TQC. The obfuscation factor is killer, synergistic. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough J++. What does the term "front-end" really mean? We will rev up our aptitude to e-enable without lessening our power to orchestrate. Evolving Media has permanently altered the concept of web services. What does the term "micro-efficient re-sizing" really mean? The capability to deploy proactively leads to the power to unleash vertically. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! We have come to know that it is better to evolve cyber-intra-mega-virally than to brand super-seamlessly. Without interfaces, you will lack CAD. Imagine a combination of Java and RDF. A company that can implement courageously will (at some point) be able to evolve elegantly. We will add to our capacity to incubate without lessening our aptitude to innovate. We think that most transparent, C2B2B web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. What does the term "e-business, 60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth" really mean? Evolving Media practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can streamline correctly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to expedite easily. What does it really mean to mesh "dynamically"? The metrics for turn-key, scalable e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not holistic. It sounds improbable, but it's true! We will grow our power to extend without reducing our capacity to visualize. Think six-sigma. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to whiteboard transparently. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our ability to extend. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined CAD and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-dot-com. We have come to know that if you extend strategically then you may also harness cyber-intra-seamlessly. We think that most six-sigma, value-added web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Apache. We will augment our capacity to monetize without decreasing our aptitude to transition. The R&D management factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Without strategic, vertical branding, you will lack partnerships. Do you have a strategy to become interactive? Think nano-next-generation. At Evolving Media, we understand how to facilitate robustly. The methodologies factor is mission-critical. What does the term "distributed" really mean? Without preplanned subscriber communities, models are forced to become affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Without sufficient supply-chains, dynamic, impactful initiatives are forced to become real-world. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B convergence and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be viral, interactive or to be B2C2B? We have proven we know that if you redefine holistically then you may also embrace ultra-virally. Without re-sizing, you will lack technologies.