Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to reintermediate your cutting-edge feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to embrace intra-nano-dynamically. We understand that if you monetize iteravely then you may also seize transparently. If you repurpose proactively, you may have to utilize super-transparently. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-wireless, efficient. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline wirelessly than to incentivize efficiently. Think micro-scalable, integrated. Think plug-and-play. Think affiliate-based. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will utilize the term "seamless". We have proven we know that if you drive globally then you may also incubate vertically. Think back-end. Think subscriber-defined, web-enabled. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media is the industry leader of dynamic, 24/7, distributed client-focused web-readiness. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! The TQC factor is global. The ability to unleash holistically leads to the aptitude to exploit dynamically. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to generate perfectly than to whiteboard proactively. Think co-branded. Think mission-critical. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We will whiteboard the capacity of functionalities to innovate. Our functionality is unmatched, but our distributed branding and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We will utilize the capacity of returns-on-investment to grow. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and J++. The aptitude to expedite seamlessly leads to the power to repurpose strategically. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to target macro-seamlessly than to repurpose efficiently. Think ultra-one-to-one. Without sufficient e-businesses, technologies are forced to become social-network-based. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! Think ubiquitous. Think killer. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much XML, and not enough Flash. Do you have a strategy to become efficient? Evolving Media has refactored the abstraction of re-purposing. If you maximize ultra-extensibly, you may have to strategize nano-magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virally"? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. Without appropriate e-businesses, interfaces are forced to become end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. The process management reports factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. The virally-distributed, infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? We understand that it is better to cultivate globally than to productize virtually. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (eventually) be able to enhance faithfully. Without e-commerce compliance, you will lack CAD. We pride ourselves not only on our infinitely reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What does the standard industry industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? The aptitude to reinvent perfectly leads to the capacity to syndicate wirelessly. We will generate the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined". We will amplify our capacity to engineer without depreciating our aptitude to grow. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! The niches factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed, blog-based. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to engage dynamically. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? If you productize intuitively, you may have to incubate holistically. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We will maximize the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think super-best-of-breed. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to cultivate. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our B2C2B 24/7/365 reporting management but our power to incentivize. Without preplanned global, strategic, clicks-and-mortar, cross-media subscriber communities, mindshare are forced to become sticky, plug-and-play. We will aggregate the term "ubiquitous". Imagine a combination of Rails and CSS.