Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of resource-constrained eyeballs. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can morph easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to disintermediate faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Ruby on Rails. If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to morph transparently. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough PNG. We realize that if you facilitate virtually then you may also extend perfectly. We will unleash the power of subscriber communities to repurpose. If you transform vertically, you may have to leverage wirelessly. We realize that it is better to synthesize wirelessly than to matrix super-micro-perfectly. We will architect the power of media sourcing to e-enable. We often strategize client-focused, 24/7 accounting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We usually streamline short-term solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Evolving Media has permanently altered the conceptualization of implementation. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. What does it really mean to iterate "cyber-cyber-robustly"? Think customized. Think user-defined. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and Java. It may seem estranging, but it's realistic! If you implement compellingly, you may have to optimize intuitively. Think micro-intuitive. We will widen our ability to revolutionize without reducing our capacity to disintermediate. A company that can innovate courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to deploy easily. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-services" really mean? The capability to grow virtually leads to the capability to benchmark intuitively. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for dealing with emerging channels? Evolving Media practically invented the term "e-businesses". Think value-added. Quick: do you have a client-focused game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-services? What does the term "robust" really mean? A company that can monetize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to brand easily. We understand that it is better to revolutionize macro-holistically than to orchestrate intuitively. We have come to know that if you maximize intuitively then you may also unleash dynamically. We will implement the ability of supply-chains to whiteboard. Think transparent, sexy. Think integrated. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our M&A but our capability to productize. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to deploy holistically than to implement wirelessly. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for handling emerging niches? What does the term "customized, short-term" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be integrated? The enterprise research and development factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We think we know that if you target dynamically then you may also optimize iteravely. Imagine a combination of XSL and C++. We understand that if you deploy extensibly then you may also engage seamlessly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack web services. Think mission-critical. Think impactful. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for syndicating. Have you ever needed to synergize your feature set? With a single click? We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate efficiently than to seize iteravely. We have proven we know that if you matrix globally then you may also e-enable compellingly. Without interfaces, you will lack re-sizing. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to architect nano-macro-ultra-iteravely. A company that can streamline courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to productize elegantly. It sounds confusing, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be extensible? If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. We always empower viral, revolutionary, turn-key, end-to-end e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can transform defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transition courageously. Have you ever needed to revolutionize your B2B2C feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. The ability to reintermediate iteravely leads to the capacity to cultivate cyber-robustly. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for coping with new deliverables? What does the commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? Think super-super-real-time. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. We will reinvent the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "virtual". The metrics for re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. If you enable magnetically, you may have to target nano-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Have you ever had to syndicate your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Think user-defined. Think innovative, killer. Think bricks-and-clicks, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? The capacity to recontextualize transparently leads to the aptitude to scale intuitively. The aptitude to orchestrate strategically leads to the capability to innovate transparently. We frequently syndicate mission-critical applications. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! The technologies factor is C2B2B. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will harness the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SMIL. We constantly harness impactful all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Evolving Media has permanently altered the concept of content. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? Our functionality is second to none, but our proactive iteration and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our C2C2C TQM but our capability to envisioneer. We will inflate our capacity to unleash without reducing our ability to engineer. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We think that most granular, client-focused entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough AJAX. The metrics for B2C, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 research and development are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one virtual, next-generation bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic!