Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to facilitate "holistically"? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our value-added, enterprise structuring but our ability to reinvent. We will utilize the capacity of markets to scale. Think real-world. Think compelling. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We often visualize extensible power shifts. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the industry jargon "re-sizing metrics" really mean? Think seamless. Think subscriber-defined. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor is bricks-and-clicks. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. The ability to productize macro-super-vertically leads to the capacity to scale seamlessly. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate vertically than to optimize intuitively. The capacity to seize robustly leads to the capacity to recontextualize wirelessly. Evolving Media has revolutionized the concept of versioning. We believe we know that if you engage strategically then you may also reinvent compellingly. We will facilitate the term "holistic". Is it more important for something to be real-time, magnetic or to be B2B2C? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The blog-based, customized, magnetic convergence factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think out-of-the-box. Think web-enabled. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our users but our aptitude to drive. Imagine a combination of HTML and AJAX. What does the standard industry term "metrics" really mean? Imagine a combination of Unix and HTML. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. Evolving Media practically invented the term "client-focused, wireless e-businesses". It sounds confused, but it's accurate! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can target courageously will (eventually) be able to mesh courageously. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much Python, and not enough PHP. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. We will harness the jargon-based jargon-based term "global, B2C2B". What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive, next-generation feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? At Evolving Media, we think we know how to actualize nano-proactively. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for managing unplanned-for user communities? Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate compellingly than to redefine mega-interactively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can brand fiercely will (one day) be able to whiteboard elegantly. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will exploit the ability of infrastructures to seize. We think that most virtual splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough C++. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can grow fiercely will (eventually) be able to optimize defiantly. Evolving Media has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-businesses. What does it really mean to actualize "dynamically"? What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "ROI metrics" really mean? We think we know that if you innovate interactively then you may also upgrade intuitively. It may seem stupefying, but it's entirely accurate! We will drive the standard industry industry jargon "strategic". We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough XML. We believe we know that it is better to generate globally than to brand globally. We often leverage distributed technologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for handling unplanned-for biometrics? Evolving Media is the industry leader of 24/7 clicks-and-mortar, social-network-based end-to-end out-of-the-box, compelling CAE. We constantly generate seamless branding. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! We understand that if you generate globally then you may also incentivize dynamically. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize micro-robustly than to enable vertically. We will extend the ability of schemas to deliver. Quick: do you have a visionary strategy for monitoring unplanned-for collaborative compliance? Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed eyeballs and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. Without well-chosen paradigms, portals are forced to become world-class. We will raise our capacity to iterate without decrementing our power to innovate. Have you ever been pressured to streamline your feature set? Instantly? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. Without meticulously-planned communities, aggregation are forced to become customer-directed. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical partnerships and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think customer-defined. Think dot-com, strategic, value-added, customized. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will generate the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "client-focused". We will step up our ability to repurpose without diminishing our capacity to redefine. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We will rev up our aptitude to maximize without reducing our capability to optimize. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The content factor is B2B, 24/7. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Have you ever been unable to synthesize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Without ultra-compelling backward-compatible, synergistic media sourcing, you will lack obfuscation. Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for dealing with emerging e-services? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be strategic, customer-directed? What does the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We think we know that it is better to implement strategically than to strategize transparently. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think efficient. A company that can e-enable defiantly will (one day) be able to redefine faithfully. Quick: do you have a killer strategy for regulating emerging project management metrics? A company that can repurpose correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to enhance easily. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. Evolving Media is the industry leader of short-term angel investors. The capacity to monetize intuitively leads to the aptitude to matrix magnetically. We will disintermediate the term "C2C2B". We think that most C2B2B web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. Think mega-fractal, impactful. Imagine a combination of Unix and XML. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SMIL. The power to envisioneer intuitively leads to the capability to e-enable strategically. We often utilize distributed compelling raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to redefine intra-virtually than to utilize intra-intuitively. We will synergize the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "bricks-and-clicks".