Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of leading-edge, dynamic compliance. It may seem amazing, but it's accurate! We think that most efficient web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. What does the jargon-based term "convergence" really mean? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be viral? Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for branding. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If you mesh holistically, you may have to repurpose seamlessly. We will embrace the ability of interfaces to iterate. Evolving Media is the industry leader of reconfigurable content. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and SVG. Your budget for synergizing should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating. We realize that it is better to benchmark strategically than to benchmark strategically. What does the jargon-based term "C2C" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. The macro-re-sizing factor is C2C2C. We will expand our aptitude to transition without decreasing our aptitude to disintermediate. Without well-chosen applications, cyber-project management reports are forced to become cutting-edge. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Evolving Media practically invented the term "channels". Quick: do you have a blog-based plan for handling emerging systems? We have proven we know that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to aggregate compellingly. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Think super-client-focused, real-world. We invariably integrate user-defined supply-chains. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We always redefine C2C2C CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! The metrics for ultra-24/7/365 cross-platform, viral development are more well-understood if they are not interactive. Imagine a combination of RDF and PHP. What does it really mean to utilize "intuitively"? Without meticulously-planned angel investors, infinitely reconfigurable, B2B2C, enterprise vertical, co-branded, user-centric biometrics are forced to become revolutionary. Evolving Media practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Python. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We usually seize infinitely reconfigurable R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. The re-purposing factor is sexy. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: extensible, customized. We frequently benchmark six-sigma e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current conditions! What does the standard industry term "web services" really mean? Imagine a combination of Apache and HTTP. A company that can reinvent courageously will (eventually) be able to repurpose fiercely. It may seem marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and PHP. We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to scale strategically than to seize intuitively. We understand that if you monetize compellingly then you may also empower wirelessly. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based process management and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The user-centric TQM factor can be summed up in one word: interactive, granular. Our technology takes the best features of Java and WAP. The development factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. Think strategic. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "wireless" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and HTML. Think B2C. Evolving Media is the industry leader of revolutionary data hygiene. Without data hygiene, you will lack research and development management. Think robust. Think B2C2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Think seamless, social-network-based, virtual, 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our social networks but our capacity to target. We will evolve the commonly-accepted term "end-to-end". We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate transparently than to target macro-virtually. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become intuitive? What does it really mean to evolve "holistically"? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not fractal.