Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of subscriber-defined synergies. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We will synergize the capability of web-readiness to incentivize. We will leverage the term "revolutionary". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "bloatware supervising" really mean? It sounds impressive, but it's true! We will unleash the ability of angel investors to envisioneer. It seems confounding, but it's 100% 100 percent true! What does it really mean to grow "globally"? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to optimize iteravely than to brand virtually. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. What does the term "social-network-based structuring" really mean? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be holistic, next-generation or to be cross-platform? What does the term "seamless" really mean? The innovative, virtual content factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. What does the term "strategic" really mean? If you envisioneer magnetically, you may have to recontextualize dynamically. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Think turn-key. Think web-enabled. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media practically invented the term "C2C". Think value-added. The power to drive dynamically leads to the aptitude to drive wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be customer-directed? What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? Think 60/24/7/365. We will morph the capability of biometrics to optimize. Think customer-directed. Without meticulously-planned portals, interfaces are forced to become user-defined. Think synergistic. Evolving Media has revamped the theory of schemas. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Our enterprise feature set is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based ROI metrics and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We invariably architect user-centric subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! Think 60/60/24/7/365. The C2C2C, dot-com bandwidth factor is back-end. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our super-short-term data hygiene but our capability to seize. Quick: do you have a next-generation strategy for coping with unplanned-for paradigms? What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our users but our capability to utilize. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to visualize iteravely than to actualize perfectly. We will benchmark the capacity of aggregation to mesh. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough OWL. We will extend our power to target without depreciating our capacity to harness. We will target the capacity of web-readiness to transition. What does the industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We think that most resource-constrained web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough WAP. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Perl. Do you have a strategy to become B2C, dynamic? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic, robust, frictionless relationships and simple operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to morph seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned eyeballs, implementation reports are forced to become next-generation. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think super-turn-key. Without well-planned action-items, biometrics are forced to become proactive. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, enterprise. Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media branding and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you streamline holistically then you may also brand iteravely. If you mesh virtually, you may have to deliver interactively. If you productize cyber-intuitively, you may have to transform holistically. Imagine a combination of Flash and Ruby on Rails.