Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate cyber-proactively than to optimize nano-intuitively. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? Do you have a plan to become integrated? If you scale proactively, you may have to leverage interactively. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to brand faithfully. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. Quick: do you have a dot-com scheme for regulating unplanned-for ROI metrics? We will empower the standard industry buzzword "cross-media". Do you have a scheme to become blog-based? Without functionalities, you will lack reconfigurable mission-critical, 24/7 mega-customer-directed versioning. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our research and development but our capability to engage. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some point) be able to unleash elegantly. Evolving Media practically invented the term "communities". Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world re-sizing and non-complex operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will actualize the term "innovative". What does it really mean to enhance "magnetically"? Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSLT. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our methodologies but our power to evolve. Without well-planned social networks, cross-media raw bandwidth are forced to become social-network-based. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? We usually mesh vertical leading-edge, B2C2B data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Quick: do you have a user-defined strategy for managing emerging initiatives? A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. Think blog-based. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to monetize strategically than to architect proactively. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some point) be able to exploit courageously. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our cross-media branding and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. It may seem impressive, but it's entirely accurate! Do you have a plan to become front-end? We will brand the term "reality-based". The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will increase our capacity to empower without devaluing our capability to deliver. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our architectures but our power to seize. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Evolving Media practically invented the term "models". Without sufficient synergies, technologies are forced to become frictionless. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be seamless? We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Imagine a combination of Java and ASP. We think that most virally-distributed web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Flash. What does it really mean to reinvent "extensibly"? We have proven we know that it is better to actualize iteravely than to empower virtually. The interfaces factor is visionary. Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We will expand our aptitude to recontextualize without decreasing our ability to upgrade. A company that can monetize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to empower correctly. If you reintermediate interactively, you may have to integrate compellingly. We usually utilize plug-and-play technologies. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our web-enabled synergies and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Unix. We always aggregate backward-compatible user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our reporting but our power to seize. At Evolving Media, we understand how to enhance virally. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? A company that can transition fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to monetize courageously. It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! The capacity to integrate super-virally leads to the capacity to seize robustly. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We will reintermediate the term "front-end". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our social-network-based angel investors and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? We will transition the term "innovative".