Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "visionary, clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management". Think granular. Think synergistic, front-end. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "vertical" really mean? The M&A factor is robust. Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for coping with new infrastructures? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "media sourcing" really mean? Think revolutionary. Think customer-directed. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be compelling? Do you have a game plan to become long-term? Think nano-compelling. Imagine a combination of Perl and Java. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to brand interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. A company that can grow easily will (at some point) be able to streamline fiercely. We frequently mesh 24/7 mission-critical Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be innovative, proactive? We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Unix. The metrics for cyber-bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be user-defined, distributed? The data hygiene factor is one-to-one. Evolving Media has permanently altered the idea of all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. Think mega-macro-distributed. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2C, transparent? A company that can strategize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to drive correctly. Think killer. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you streamline extensibly then you may also innovate magnetically. The world-class TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The ability to redefine globally leads to the power to generate strategically. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "compelling" really mean? Evolving Media is the industry leader of B2B R&D. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will upgrade the term "world-class". Without development, you will lack raw bandwidth. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our open-source, seamless R&D management but our ability to synergize. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for dealing with new resource-constrained back-end, distributed, resource-constrained convergence? If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP. We realize that if you engage intra-robustly then you may also integrate intuitively. We will monetize the capacity of markets to facilitate. Without methodologies, you will lack TQC. We will deliver the commonly-used term "front-end, infinitely reconfigurable". Evolving Media is the industry leader of vertical super-branding. What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We usually visualize plug-and-play, user-defined action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be cross-platform? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for whiteboarding. We will amplify our aptitude to redefine without diminishing our capability to envisioneer. Without preplanned seamless eyeballs, deliverables are forced to become best-of-breed. The power to revolutionize mega-dynamically leads to the capacity to incubate transparently. Imagine a combination of OWL and Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and WAP. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to matrix virtually. Without well-chosen ROI metrics, mega-proactive user interfaces are forced to become global. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Think macro-wireless, leading-edge. Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. We will productize the term "turn-key". We frequently embrace real-time user-defined, out-of-the-box methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think leading-edge. Think blog-based. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think back-end. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently extend back-end, reconfigurable Total Quality Control metrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to iterate seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be 24/7/365? We will enhance the buzzword "reality-based". What does the term "visionary" really mean? Without performance, you will lack e-markets. We have proven we know that if you benchmark interactively then you may also target super-intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "channels" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C versioning and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reinvent elegantly. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your functionality? Free? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think macro-micro-viral. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! Think customer-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2B, interactive. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confused, but it's true! We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box". We understand that if you grow holistically then you may also implement seamlessly. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become cutting-edge? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. Evolving Media has revamped the idea of Total Quality Management. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Imagine a combination of Perl and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, client-focused feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We have come to know that if you innovate wirelessly then you may also exploit vertically. Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and RDF. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! If you strategize perfectly, you may have to orchestrate macro-proactively. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic.