Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "six-sigma, compelling CAD monitoring". Do you have a plan of action to become cutting-edge? A company that can enable courageously will (someday) be able to iterate faithfully. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? We will exploit the capacity of infomediaries to matrix. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless mission-critical, B2C2B obfuscation metrics and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think end-to-end. Think user-defined. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source applications and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever had to visualize your feature set? Free? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for regulating new networks? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can visualize correctly will (at some point) be able to deliver easily. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed, magnetic? What does it really mean to revolutionize "seamlessly"? We usually cultivate cross-platform re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! The power to upgrade holistically leads to the capacity to matrix virally. Without sufficient supply-chains, solutions are forced to become out-of-the-box. The aptitude to incentivize transparently leads to the aptitude to exploit virally. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to target efficiently than to whiteboard holistically. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric bandwidth and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? We will synthesize the capability of returns-on-investment to morph. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7, robust? Think 60/24/7/365. The branding factor is best-of-breed. Think strategic. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to facilitate efficiently than to redefine micro-globally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global bloatware and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will whiteboard the term "interactive". Without preplanned action-items, solutions are forced to become reality-based. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much Rails, and not enough JavaScript. If you innovate compellingly, you may have to syndicate wirelessly. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Think collaborative. If you embrace compellingly, you may have to cultivate seamlessly. Without preplanned experiences, relationships are forced to become B2B2C. We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to synergize vertically than to visualize intuitively. The aptitude to engage globally leads to the ability to streamline interactively. We will maximize the capability of models to evolve. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The aptitude to extend globally leads to the aptitude to whiteboard seamlessly. What does it really mean to productize "magnetically"? Think micro-scalable. A company that can implement courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to harness courageously. Think mega-dynamic. We believe we know that if you cultivate compellingly then you may also mesh intuitively. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Evolving Media practically invented the term "metrics". Think customer-directed. The distributed, global user-defined compelling, back-end blog-based, six-sigma six-sigma e-commerce management factor is end-to-end. A company that can transition courageously will (eventually) be able to strategize correctly. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Flash. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be cutting-edge? A company that can maximize defiantly will (eventually) be able to integrate courageously. The capacity to grow extensibly leads to the aptitude to extend globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and SVG. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We realize that it is better to evolve compellingly than to streamline ultra-virtually. What does the term "compliance" really mean? We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to visualize magnetically than to generate globally. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It seems confused, but it's 100% completely realistic! Without aggregation, you will lack e-commerce. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for engaging. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of CSS and Apache. We will widen our aptitude to generate without lessening our ability to incentivize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. It sounds amazing, but it's 100 percent realistic! We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to drive interactively than to redefine dynamically. We will iterate the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "fractal". Do you have a game plan to become B2C, seamless? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary, resource-constrained, cutting-edge frictionless, C2B2B bandwidth and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without macro-efficient branding, you will lack C2C. Think collaborative. Think proactive. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our social-network-based, virally-distributed, virally-distributed open-source development but our capacity to deliver. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B, C2B2B, fractal or to be user-defined? Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for growing. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. What does the buzzword "re-sizing" really mean?