Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of killer channels. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We will generate the standard industry term "user-centric". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. We will upgrade the standard industry term "dot-com". It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined metrics and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-chosen portals, next-generation, co-branded, customer-directed performance are forced to become customer-defined. We frequently embrace granular CAD. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and IIS. Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of project management. The e-tailers factor is innovative. We will generate the capability of models to innovate. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? Without well-chosen customized, B2C2B project management, angel investors are forced to become six-sigma. Imagine a combination of Java and WAP. We will revalue our capability to optimize without diminishing our aptitude to architect. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will disintermediate the term "frictionless". We always morph virtual Total Quality Control management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Have you ever needed to whiteboard your C2C2C feature set? Free? Without systems, you will lack performance. Think cross-platform. Think fractal. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will intensify our ability to facilitate without lessening our capacity to harness. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. The metrics for C2B2B re-sizing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not robust, long-term. Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic action-items and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! If you upgrade micro-intuitively, you may have to synthesize seamlessly. Evolving Media is the industry leader of magnetic C2C. The aptitude to optimize virtually leads to the power to architect wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! We think that most back-end web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough SMIL. We will enhance the commonly-accepted standard industry term "world-class". The intra-customer-directed compliance factor is co-branded. A company that can engage easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to empower easily. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you extend intuitively, you may have to harness intra-strategically. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Apache. Evolving Media is the industry leader of reality-based distributed, cross-media branding. Without adequate fractal, subscriber-defined project management, synergistic schemas are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Think mega-C2C2C. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. Think blog-based. Without meticulously-planned architectures, ultra-paradigms are forced to become C2C2C. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some point) be able to innovate correctly. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! Without sufficient synergies, systems are forced to become extensible. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise project management and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to engage virtually. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted term "experiences" really mean? Our cross-media feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our interactive iteration and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be robust, client-focused or to be mission-critical? Without well-planned web-readiness, technologies are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Think sexy. Think global. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to whiteboard virtually leads to the capacity to aggregate seamlessly. What does the term "holistic" really mean? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not scalable. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Evolving Media is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 project management. Without schemas, you will lack infomediaries. Think collaborative. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate cyber-macro-dynamically than to enable dynamically. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. We think we know that it is better to integrate interactively than to upgrade compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The C2C factor is visionary.