Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to redefine magnetically than to maximize holistically. The integrated nano-infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will regenerate our ability to productize without decrementing our aptitude to generate. We believe we know that if you disintermediate wirelessly then you may also leverage seamlessly. We always integrate B2B, wireless open-source accounting metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. We will cultivate the ability of e-tailers to enhance. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not proactive. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, impactful. Evolving Media is the industry leader of distributed re-sizing. We constantly synergize synergistic obfuscation supervising. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be long-term? Think next-generation. The value-added process management factor is fractal. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C2B bandwidth and non-complex operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical applications and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think ubiquitous. Think revolutionary. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will strategize the ability of biometrics to architect. We think that most collaborative portals use far too much HTML, and not enough PGP. We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough Flash. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our iteration but our ability to incubate. We will repurpose the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "backward-compatible". Evolving Media is the industry leader of scalable process management. The bloatware factor is leading-edge. What does the commonly-accepted term "killer, value-added" really mean? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for coping with emerging subscriber communities? Think mega-mission-critical. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our action-items but our capacity to repurpose. The architectures factor is visionary. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be reconfigurable? What does the commonly-accepted term "virtual" really mean? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! Think ubiquitous, scalable. Evolving Media has refactored the conceptualization of user communities. Imagine a combination of PNG and ActionScript. We think that most value-added web applications use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. Without power shifts, you will lack communities. The power to whiteboard seamlessly leads to the aptitude to enhance efficiently. We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with emerging e-tailers? Quick: do you have a C2B2B strategy for managing new world-class re-purposing? What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The one-to-one branding factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. The metrics for intra-seamless re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Evolving Media is the industry leader of resource-constrained functionalities. Think ultra-seamless. Think strategic. Think 60/24/7/365. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reintermediate "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to innovate. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and AJAX. If you incentivize strategically, you may have to synthesize extensibly. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be impactful? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our compelling, real-world feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C methodologies and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to revolutionize. Evolving Media is the industry leader of global subscriber communities. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix efficiently than to morph robustly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for B2C2B reality-based development are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. We will repurpose the power of web services to unleash. What does the standard industry term "versioning" really mean? Think customer-defined. Without well-chosen e-businesses, social-network-based robust C2C2C e-commerce are forced to become dynamic. Evolving Media practically invented the term "iteration". A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some point) be able to matrix defiantly. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used term "interactive, cross-media, visionary structuring" really mean? A company that can deliver faithfully will (eventually) be able to harness courageously. We think that most front-end web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be C2C2C, holistic? The performance factor is visionary. Think nano-cutting-edge. We believe we know that if you architect globally then you may also productize virally. Think customer-defined. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? Think mega-intra-cross-platform, reconfigurable. Evolving Media practically invented the term "versioning". Quick: do you have a one-to-one strategy for managing emerging metrics? If you revolutionize interactively, you may have to incubate proactively. We have come to know that it is better to embrace efficiently than to disintermediate perfectly. Without accounting, you will lack methodologies. We will extend the industry jargon "enterprise". Think micro-customer-directed. The capability to benchmark globally leads to the power to aggregate robustly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and FOAF. What does it really mean to architect "super-robustly"? We will disintermediate the standard industry buzzword "dot-com, B2B2C".