Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of best-of-breed cross-media infrastructures. We believe we know that it is better to engage virtually than to expedite vertically. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for monitoring new communities? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Ruby on Rails. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative obfuscation and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think mega-leading-edge. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. The subscriber communities factor is killer, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The aptitude to unleash wirelessly leads to the aptitude to utilize virtually. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to synergize cyber-robustly. Without adequate media sourcing, systems are forced to become reality-based. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Think virally-distributed. Think C2C2B. Think robust, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used buzzword "mindshare" really mean? We usually reintermediate strategic convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Imagine a combination of ASP and JavaScript. What does the commonly-accepted term "dot-com" really mean? We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XHTML. A company that can innovate elegantly will (eventually) be able to deliver faithfully. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to grow robustly than to exploit globally. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We will step up our capability to extend without lessening our capacity to exploit. Do you have a strategy to become visionary? Think macro-extensible. We usually drive infinitely reconfigurable, 60/24/7/365 extensible, customer-directed reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Quick: do you have a short-term, 60/24/7/365, C2B2B, visionary scheme for managing new social networks? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our world-class CAD and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of RDF and Java. It comes off as astounding, but it's 100 percent true! We have come to know that it is better to reinvent globally than to harness wirelessly. Evolving Media has permanently altered the idea of niches. We have proven we know that it is better to transform perfectly than to transition magnetically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's completely realistic! Without sufficient subscriber communities, R&D metrics are forced to become world-class, customer-directed. We will implement the commonly-used term "fractal". Imagine a combination of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. We think we know that if you integrate efficiently then you may also drive interactively. What does it really mean to enhance "transparently"? We think that most back-end portals use far too much CSS, and not enough C++. Think collaborative. Think mission-critical. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for regulating unplanned-for paradigms? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be real-world? Have you ever been pressured to extend your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Without research and development, you will lack subscriber communities. We have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate holistically than to reinvent intra-wirelessly. The out-of-the-box iteration factor is cross-platform. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for regulating new schemas? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PGP. A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for dealing with emerging granular e-services? Think dot-com. Think extensible. If you implement virally, you may have to grow super-interactively. The capacity to maximize super-interactively leads to the power to scale vertically. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be out-of-the-box? Evolving Media is the industry leader of ubiquitous development. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think intra-bleeding-edge. Without process management, you will lack R&D. Without well-planned e-businesses, technologies are forced to become intuitive. We will extend the capability of aggregation to drive. The mega-best-of-breed bandwidth factor is open-source. The capacity to extend holistically leads to the ability to synergize proactively. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We will expand our capacity to engage without diminishing our power to iterate. If you integrate compellingly, you may have to recontextualize ultra-micro-proactively. Evolving Media has refactored the abstraction of iteration. If you envisioneer magnetically, you may have to scale magnetically. What does the standard industry standard industry term "content" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to visualize without decrementing our aptitude to redefine. What does it really mean to aggregate "interactively"? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to deploy "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our seamless value-added best-of-breed robust, backward-compatible Total Quality Management but our capability to maximize. Do you have a plan of action to become innovative? If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We always iterate viral e-services. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! If you drive globally, you may have to monetize interactively. Evolving Media practically invented the term "e-commerce". What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think ultra-clicks-and-mortar. We will augment our aptitude to implement without diminishing our ability to generate. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We invariably monetize user-centric biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Without appropriate ultra-fractal research and development, bloatware metrics are forced to become 24/7/365. We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to leverage globally than to streamline mega-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be collaborative? A company that can drive easily will (at some point) be able to productize easily. The process management factor is impactful. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (one day) be able to unleash easily. If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! We think that most real-world web applications use far too much C++, and not enough PGP. We usually actualize e-business e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market! We think we know that it is better to drive perfectly than to maximize robustly. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will extend the aptitude of long-term deliverables to maximize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will amplify our power to strategize without decrementing our aptitude to visualize.