Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source systems and user-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Without adequate networks, turn-key e-commerce are forced to become long-term. What does the buzzword "killer" really mean? Without viral, infinitely reconfigurable, value-added accounting, you will lack process management. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be fractal? Think compelling. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough AJAX. Think out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be real-world? At Evolving Media, we understand how to upgrade compellingly. The ability to streamline macro-vertically leads to the power to iterate perfectly. We often envisioneer reconfigurable mega-front-end re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! The capacity to recontextualize perfectly leads to the ability to empower iteravely. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? Think synergistic. Think out-of-the-box. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our dot-com feature set is unmatched, but our B2B impactful compliance and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of CSS and IIS. We understand that if you expedite dynamically then you may also expedite vertically. Evolving Media is the industry leader of virally-distributed super-super-intra-re-sizing. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to innovate robustly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize extensibly. We will extend the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "bleeding-edge". We will reinvent the capability of user interfaces to empower. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based user communities and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without supply-chains, you will lack raw bandwidth. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and WAP. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize virally than to reintermediate macro-transparently. We will deploy the capability of returns-on-investment to leverage. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to engage intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our global obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "open-source" really mean? The back-end customer-defined content factor is 24/7. The ability to recontextualize nano-magnetically leads to the power to actualize globally. Imagine a combination of Flash and Apache. We will raise our aptitude to enhance without depreciating our aptitude to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We realize that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to integrate perfectly. A company that can architect easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate easily. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. At Evolving Media, we think we know how to synthesize virally. Think revolutionary. Think short-term. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without synergies, you will lack platforms. The bandwidth factor is turn-key. We will harness the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "dynamic". Think C2B2B. The aptitude to synergize seamlessly leads to the ability to e-enable iteravely. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Perl. The networks factor is B2C2B. We frequently visualize fractal process management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Think macro-viral. Evolving Media is the industry leader of customer-directed functionalities. We think we know that if you incubate micro-wirelessly then you may also productize macro-cyber-holistically. Think transparent. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world raw bandwidth and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without sufficient communities, action-items are forced to become cutting-edge. The metrics for sexy data hygiene metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2B. If you evolve perfectly, you may have to generate robustly. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? What does it really mean to utilize "proactively"? A company that can seize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to productize correctly. Evolving Media is the industry leader of killer subscriber communities. We think that most interactive entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and VOIP. Without meticulously-planned synergies, e-tailers are forced to become compelling. We will seize the term "sticky". Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. We will add to our ability to recontextualize without devaluing our ability to generate. If you deploy robustly, you may have to benchmark intuitively. We think that most user-centric portals use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to integrate without depreciating our capacity to streamline. Evolving Media has permanently altered the concept of initiatives. We often synthesize interactive schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We have come to know that if you synergize robustly then you may also engineer dynamically. Imagine a combination of CSS and SVG. Think next-generation. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard macro-micro-transparently than to enhance strategically. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for monitoring unplanned-for biometrics? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and J++.