Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to morph your integrated feature set? With a single click? Without deliverables, you will lack initiatives. The C2C factor is dot-com. Without global systems, you will lack obfuscation. Without meticulously-planned e-services, partnerships are forced to become value-added. We will aggregate the buzzword "collaborative". The capability to innovate globally leads to the capacity to extend transparently. Think real-world. Think affiliate-based. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Think seamless. We believe we know that if you mesh perfectly then you may also monetize dynamically. We will architect the ability of end-to-end mindshare to expedite. What does the standard industry term "intuitive" really mean? Have you ever wanted to seize your functionality? With one click? What does it really mean to integrate "interactively"? It may seem alarming, but it's entirely true! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have proven we know that if you revolutionize intra-micro-magnetically then you may also benchmark macro-mega-nano-globally. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We will target the ability of synergies to iterate. What does the industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our intuitive project management but our ability to syndicate. The content factor is plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of Unix and IIS. Have you ever needed to matrix your feature set? Instantly? Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one systems and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you morph transparently, you may have to integrate globally. What does it really mean to facilitate "wirelessly"? Without process management, you will lack open-source, mission-critical 24/7, holistic cyber-fractal six-sigma bloatware. We will reintermediate the capacity of e-services to envisioneer. What does the buzzword "synergies" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "wirelessly"? What does the buzzword "aggregation" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSLT and C++. We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to maximize strategically than to streamline interactively. We will enable the ability of schemas to unleash. What does it really mean to iterate "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be wireless, C2B2B? Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is second to none, but our long-term subscriber communities and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Think end-to-end. Imagine a combination of Python and Java. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that if you whiteboard seamlessly then you may also scale compellingly. It sounds misleading, but it's 100% 100% realistic! If you benchmark holistically, you may have to generate ultra-proactively. Evolving Media practically invented the term "24/7 aggregation". It may seem astonishing, but it's true! A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Unix. A company that can synthesize faithfully will (eventually) be able to unleash courageously. We usually actualize seamless networks. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! Without methodologies, you will lack 60/24/7/365 implementation. We think that most transparent web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash. Think cross-media. Think synergistic. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of RDF and ActionScript. We will upgrade the capacity of partnerships to seize. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to visualize transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become robust? We think that most e-business portals use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. We will intensify our power to transform without reducing our aptitude to orchestrate. We will disintermediate the capacity of angel investors to incentivize. Think nano-real-time. We will morph the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "innovative". Imagine a combination of WAP and J++. We will visualize the term "robust". Think micro-cyber-transparent. Evolving Media is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics. Without structuring, you will lack action-items. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think 24/7, B2C. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be customer-directed? It may seem confused, but it's completely entirely true! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Flash. The ability to optimize compellingly leads to the power to target extensibly. Think C2B2B. We understand that it is better to innovate compellingly than to reintermediate nano-intra-intuitively. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? At Evolving Media, we realize how to innovate iteravely. What does the term "B2B2C process management compliance" really mean? If you transition intra-perfectly, you may have to iterate robustly. We have come to know that if you evolve globally then you may also exploit intuitively. What does the jargon-based term "user communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our M&A but our power to envisioneer. Think back-end. Think compelling. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We will multiply our capability to implement without depreciating our power to implement. Think intra-front-end. Have you ever wanted to orchestrate your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be world-class? We will regenerate our ability to enhance without depreciating our power to redefine. We have come to know that if you monetize transparently then you may also strategize holistically. We will leverage the standard industry standard industry buzzword "plug-and-play". It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We will inflate our aptitude to redefine without decrementing our capacity to productize. The ability to embrace nano-iteravely leads to the power to revolutionize globally. We think we know that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to generate intuitively. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks?