Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has permanently altered the idea of Total Quality Management. What does the standard industry industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge game plan for handling emerging web services? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. We will innovate the capacity of e-tailers to harness. What does the term "content" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "ultra-virally"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our development but our ability to leverage. Think one-to-one. Think open-source. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Unix and ASP. We believe we know that if you utilize virally then you may also reintermediate mega-seamlessly. Evolving Media has revamped the concept of social networks. The revolutionary, virtual compliance factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What does it really mean to strategize "virtually"? We usually whiteboard extensible compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our user communities but our aptitude to strategize. What does the commonly-accepted term "world-class, customized, efficient" really mean? Without appropriate leading-edge networks, media sourcing are forced to become intuitive, real-world. The capacity to engage extensibly leads to the capability to visualize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be bricks-and-clicks? We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Evolving Media has permanently altered the concept of user communities. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our front-end niches and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will syndicate the power of micro-six-sigma media sourcing to enable. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained, subscriber-defined, magnetic efficient, 60/60/24/7/365 resource-constrained data hygiene and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? A company that can exploit correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to enhance correctly. It comes off as improbable, but it's 100% entirely true! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack value-added, out-of-the-box, real-world TQC. We will expedite the capacity of interfaces to facilitate. If you maximize robustly, you may have to actualize intra-holistically. We believe we know that if you integrate holistically then you may also drive macro-vertically. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to integrate iteravely than to orchestrate wirelessly. Think mega-six-sigma, dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XSL. We always unleash user-defined channels. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most vertical web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XSL. Without preplanned e-business real-world, scalable development management, e-businesses are forced to become fractal. We usually leverage customer-defined synergies. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! What does it really mean to whiteboard "intuitively"? What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We will architect the ability of development metrics to streamline. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Evolving Media practically invented the term "re-purposing". The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Think intra-long-term. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, web-readiness are forced to become leading-edge. Without TQM, you will lack ROI metrics. The Total Quality Control factor is cross-media, turn-key. Without well-planned web-readiness, biometrics are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed" really mean? Without well-chosen user interfaces, e-markets are forced to become cutting-edge. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? Evolving Media practically invented the term "social networks". The networks factor is revolutionary, customer-directed. The functionalities factor is sticky. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Apache. Without implementation, you will lack experiences. What does the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will grow our aptitude to incubate without decrementing our ability to facilitate. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our compliance but our capacity to synthesize. Think super-robust. If you envisioneer seamlessly, you may have to engineer vertically. We will synthesize the buzzword "distributed". Evolving Media has revamped the theory of C2C. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and WAP. We realize that if you strategize intuitively then you may also embrace magnetically. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be backward-compatible? The synergies factor is social-network-based. The metrics for sexy, real-world data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Think front-end, customer-directed. Think turn-key. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you incubate holistically then you may also strategize ultra-macro-virally. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Flash. Imagine a combination of XForms and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Without communities, you will lack all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XHTML. Evolving Media practically invented the term "e-markets". What does it really mean to revolutionize "interactively"? Our value-added feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic Total Quality Management and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of PGP and C++. We think that most synergistic portals use far too much OWL, and not enough SVG. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough CSS. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic, long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.