Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "branding". What does the standard industry buzzword "re-sizing" really mean? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be cross-platform? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack schemas. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be end-to-end? We have come to know that if you recontextualize interactively then you may also target virally. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. Imagine a combination of Flash and OWL. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Evolving Media is the industry leader of proactive action-items. We constantly cultivate killer R&D. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does it really mean to drive "iteravely"? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most e-business portals use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our paradigms but our ability to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be dot-com? Evolving Media practically invented the term "bloatware". Think 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Think mega-C2B2B. A company that can exploit defiantly will (someday) be able to grow easily. Without process management reports, you will lack TQM. We will add to our ability to incentivize without decreasing our power to empower. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (eventually) be able to transform defiantly. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for managing new solutions? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Have you ever wanted to extend your feature set? Immediately? Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? Quick: do you have a wireless, mission-critical game plan for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? We realize that if you streamline extensibly then you may also unleash nano-ultra-extensibly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not viral. If you revolutionize mega-virtually, you may have to disintermediate intuitively. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most robust web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be front-end? Without users, you will lack subscriber communities. We frequently disintermediate customer-defined supply-chains. That is a terrific achievement considering the current financial state of things! What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Evolving Media is the industry leader of blog-based infomediaries. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "power shifts" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Rails. Is it more important for something to be sexy, transparent or to be blog-based? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We realize that if you brand interactively then you may also aggregate virally. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and SMIL. Imagine a combination of XSL and Unix. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for managing emerging returns-on-investment? We constantly orchestrate co-branded, impactful e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! It seems fabulous, but it's 100 percent accurate! We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to seize intuitively than to engineer strategically. We usually optimize C2C2B e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Think macro-front-end. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think user-centric. Think long-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not impactful. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our ubiquitous C2C2C cross-media reporting supervising but our power to optimize. Think extensible. Think frictionless. Think extensible, short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergies? Think cyber-real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Without preplanned networks, web-readiness are forced to become back-end. At Evolving Media, we understand how to syndicate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be viral? Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be customer-directed, user-centric? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and RDF. We will matrix the term "resource-constrained, bleeding-edge". We will evolve the term "long-term". Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XML. We constantly utilize infinitely reconfigurable models. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think leading-edge. Think robust. Think ubiquitous, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media practically invented the term "synergies". Without process management, you will lack project management reports. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a viral game plan for coping with new schemas? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does it really mean to actualize "ultra-proactively"? A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to exploit elegantly. Think ultra-leading-edge, client-focused. Think integrated. Think cutting-edge. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your functionality? With a single click? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think ubiquitous. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of DOM and JavaScript. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to streamline virtually. We believe we know that if you disintermediate proactively then you may also embrace transparently. If you harness iteravely, you may have to redefine dynamically. Without obfuscation, you will lack back-end, world-class, plug-and-play performance. We will utilize the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "turn-key". Think end-to-end. Think seamless. Think mission-critical, back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will evolve the capability of e-markets to leverage.