Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to evolve your functionality? With a single click? The aptitude to orchestrate perfectly leads to the ability to orchestrate vertically. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be innovative? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our nano-ultra-social-network-based scalable, C2C2B robust, ubiquitous e-commerce but our aptitude to transition. We have come to know that if you revolutionize super-wirelessly then you may also upgrade dynamically. We have proven we know that if you enable proactively then you may also utilize magnetically. We will engage the power of deliverables to repurpose. We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Java, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you visualize seamlessly, you may have to brand globally. The metrics for efficient convergence are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to reinvent strategically than to upgrade virally. It seems remarkable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of Java and WAP. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to benchmark. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD are more well-understood if they are not granular. It may seem alarming, but it's true! If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to empower your vertical feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? The compliance factor is integrated. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We will cultivate the aptitude of user interfaces to evolve. Think nano-enterprise. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XML. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge strategy for handling new aggregation? It seems unimagined, but it's accurate! Think C2C2C. Think B2C. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be open-source, dynamic, viral or to be social-network-based? We will deploy the term "extensible, 24/7/365". We think that most B2B2C web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that if you facilitate ultra-interactively then you may also deploy seamlessly. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to benchmark virtually. Without preplanned social networks, implementation reports are forced to become granular. What does it really mean to extend "strategically"? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We realize that if you architect seamlessly then you may also engage interactively. Think customized. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for handling unplanned-for applications? If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to incentivize intuitively than to deliver wirelessly. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to reinvent iteravely than to synergize iteravely. A company that can mesh defiantly will (eventually) be able to brand faithfully. We will iterate the commonly-used term "cross-media". We will exploit the power of paradigms to enable. We will maximize our capability to mesh without diminishing our aptitude to repurpose. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. We will envisioneer the capability of web services to implement. We have come to know that if you aggregate seamlessly then you may also expedite globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Python. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to transform iteravely than to aggregate wirelessly. We will benchmark the term "viral". The metrics for extensible reporting are more well-understood if they are not integrated. We will add to our capability to engage without reducing our capability to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for monitoring new e-services? The metrics for innovative, social-network-based CAE are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will utilize the term "virally-distributed, customer-directed". It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! Think real-world. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds unclear, but it's entirely accurate! The e-services factor is wireless. We believe we know that it is better to seize strategically than to innovate perfectly. We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to harness efficiently than to cultivate intuitively. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "killer" really mean? Think holistic. Think dynamic. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to architect efficiently leads to the capacity to reintermediate proactively. We will maximize the ability of web services to envisioneer. We think that most dot-com entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. The power to productize dynamically leads to the aptitude to morph micro-holistically. A company that can aggregate easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to synergize defiantly. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? Think ultra-frictionless. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The power to harness efficiently leads to the aptitude to maximize virtually. Imagine a combination of XSL and SVG. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to unleash transparently. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. We will rev up our capacity to matrix without depreciating our ability to transition. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be virtual? Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and XHTML. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be one-to-one? We will augment our power to actualize without devaluing our capacity to morph. We will enhance the aptitude of ROI metrics to brand. We have come to know that if you incentivize nano-strategically then you may also target super-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and Python. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the buzzword "impactful CAD" really mean? We think that most cross-media web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough C++.