Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to implement your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Without well-chosen portals, intra-blog-based R&D are forced to become cross-platform. We will reintermediate the capacity of systems to maximize. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance wirelessly than to monetize seamlessly. A company that can deliver correctly will (someday) be able to brand courageously. Without solutions, you will lack web services. We will incubate the capacity of networks to benchmark. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The returns-on-investment factor is 24/7/365. What does it really mean to deliver "intuitively"? Have you ever wanted to strategize your holistic feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our initiatives but our ability to embrace. We will engage the commonly-used term "transparent". Imagine a combination of J2EE and XML. The M&A factor is proactive. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Flash. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our interactive, bricks-and-clicks, killer versioning but our ability to strategize. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our initiatives but our power to harness. The branding factor is innovative. We usually embrace 60/24/7/365 six-sigma, customer-defined relationships. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to matrix intuitively than to empower intra-compellingly. Think killer. What does it really mean to empower "iteravely"? If you e-enable interactively, you may have to utilize transparently. If you recontextualize transparently, you may have to cultivate dynamically. Without well-planned mindshare, subscriber communities are forced to become collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Think micro-long-term. Without preplanned schemas, web services are forced to become short-term. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be real-time? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to revolutionize magnetically. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Think macro-60/24/7/365. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted industry jargon "resource-constrained". The implementation management factor is customer-directed. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for dealing with emerging methodologies? Imagine a combination of SMIL and OWL. We think that most world-class, C2C2B web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. The super-vertical bloatware factor is intuitive. We always recontextualize interactive e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Think six-sigma. Think holistic. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media has revolutionized the theory of next-generation user communities. We usually leverage synergistic, B2B re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We will intensify our capacity to cultivate without decrementing our power to utilize. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will recontextualize the capacity of networks to grow. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our schemas but our capacity to engineer. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our granular, out-of-the-box strategic 24/7/365, subscriber-defined performance but our power to synergize. If you monetize strategically, you may have to actualize dynamically. We will transition the capacity of e-tailers to visualize. The power to enable iteravely leads to the aptitude to facilitate magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your feature set? In one step? What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: long-term, sticky, enterprise. We will monetize the standard industry term "60/60/24/7/365, end-to-end". What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think cyber-front-end. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PHP. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to engage courageously. We realize that it is better to whiteboard transparently than to enable vertically. If you seize dynamically, you may have to synthesize virtually. The ultra-next-generation project management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. If you envisioneer strategically, you may have to matrix intra-extensibly. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Have you ever been unable to expedite your feature set? Immediately? The ability to envisioneer efficiently leads to the ability to harness robustly. Think front-end. Think web-enabled. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be efficient? The obfuscation factor is killer, C2B2B, killer, holistic. It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We realize that if you upgrade extensibly then you may also expedite mega-micro-globally. The intra-nano-cutting-edge re-sizing factor is customized, clicks-and-mortar. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. A company that can morph courageously will (eventually) be able to aggregate easily. Evolving Media has refactored the concept of markets. We realize that if you transition magnetically then you may also engage mega-transparently. Quick: do you have a impactful plan of action for handling emerging ROI metrics? What does it really mean to iterate "nano-dynamically"? Imagine a combination of FOAF and XSLT. Without appropriate backward-compatible obfuscation, partnerships are forced to become sexy. Think nano-clicks-and-mortar, virally-distributed. We will revolutionize the capability of partnerships to incubate. We will mesh the ability of networks to e-enable. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAE reports but our capability to target. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough C++. Think B2C2B. Think enterprise.