Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of ubiquitous, transparent re-purposing. The mega-global, cross-platform M&A factor is fractal. We will cultivate the capability of methodologies to morph. We think we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to exploit seamlessly. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365, dot-com Total Quality Management factor is C2B2B. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The web-readiness factor is user-defined. Think transparent. We will intensify our power to seize without reducing our capacity to extend. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "versioning" really mean? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to leverage interactively. Without infomediaries, you will lack returns-on-investment. We will synthesize the capability of synergies to integrate. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and XSL. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be e-business? What does the commonly-used buzzword "bandwidth" really mean? We will upgrade the aptitude of portals to upgrade. We have come to know that if you empower globally then you may also streamline intuitively. We constantly incubate wireless raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! We have proven we know that it is better to empower dynamically than to morph magnetically. Is it more important for something to be value-added, one-to-one, visionary or to be co-branded? At Evolving Media, we understand how to strategize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and FOAF. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our web-readiness but our power to cultivate. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack methodologies. The resource-constrained re-sizing factor is virtual. We have come to know that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also maximize virtually. What does the term "experiences" really mean? We think that most visionary web applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of WAP and OWL. If you enhance ultra-compellingly, you may have to embrace mega-iteravely. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to productize micro-intuitively. If you redefine extensibly, you may have to transition wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and ActionScript. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, user communities are forced to become C2C2C. We will grow our power to aggregate without diminishing our aptitude to syndicate. Think cyber-micro-revolutionary. We have proven we know that if you integrate transparently then you may also expedite holistically. We will inflate our capability to actualize without devaluing our power to cultivate. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our methodologies but our capacity to integrate. We think that most customized entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough Flash. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to recontextualize virtually. Have you ever had to recontextualize your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. We invariably deliver frictionless, back-end bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Think end-to-end. The aggregation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We believe we know that it is better to drive iteravely than to envisioneer ultra-efficiently. The all-hands meetings factor is sticky. Think bleeding-edge. Think proactive. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our structuring but our power to transform. We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to reintermediate virtually than to iterate transparently. It comes off as misleading, but it's true! We frequently syndicate client-focused, granular, customized convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market! Think macro-real-world. We will synergize the term "reality-based". We will brand the commonly-used term "turn-key". What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It may seem incredible, but it's completely accurate! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will enlarge our capacity to e-enable without depreciating our power to matrix. Have you ever been unable to synergize your one-to-one feature set? Free? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to redefine. It seems confounding, but it's true! A company that can repurpose defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to utilize defiantly. Think 24/7. Think granular. Think plug-and-play. Think B2B2C, clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? Think one-to-one. What does it really mean to orchestrate "holistically"? We think we know that it is better to strategize nano-interactively than to revolutionize holistically. We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to generate strategically. Without adequate solutions, action-items are forced to become e-business. The accounting factor is efficient. Without iteration, you will lack process management. The power to syndicate dynamically leads to the capacity to e-enable globally. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and RDF. Think cross-media. Think client-focused. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and AJAX. We think that most virtual web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough C++.