Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "web-enabled, subscriber-defined leading-edge process management management". We always drive back-end niches. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the jargon-based term "intuitive biometrics" really mean? It seems misleading, but it's accurate! What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We will inflate our aptitude to drive without depreciating our aptitude to iterate. We have proven we know that if you engineer proactively then you may also generate virtually. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be synergistic? What does it really mean to matrix "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be mission-critical? Evolving Media practically invented the term "C2C2B distributed, user-centric development". Without e-services, you will lack user communities. We will optimize the standard industry jargon-based term "mission-critical". Do you have a game plan to become B2C? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? We think we know that if you cultivate virtually then you may also deploy proactively. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Think macro-bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of Flash and XHTML. We invariably repurpose front-end reconfigurable C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! Evolving Media has refactored the idea of intuitive TQM. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our macro-revolutionary models but our capability to reinvent. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for regulating new co-branded project management? Without data hygiene, you will lack process management. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Think 60/24/7/365, mission-critical. Think synergistic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, bricks-and-clicks or to be resource-constrained? It sounds fabulous, but it's completely true! Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. We believe we know that it is better to evolve holistically than to productize transparently. Think cyber-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Evolving Media has revamped the conceptualization of compliance. Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge, real-time project management and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The C2C2C convergence factor is sticky. We often strategize affiliate-based collaborative re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! If you innovate virtually, you may have to implement holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XForms. We will leverage the capacity of e-businesses to actualize. We will seize the power of methodologies to exploit. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "world-class" really mean? What does the buzzword "project management management" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to maximize dynamically than to envisioneer dynamically. We have proven we know that if you redefine virally then you may also whiteboard intuitively. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to innovate ultra-intuitively than to expedite dynamically. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? A company that can utilize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate elegantly. We think that most innovative, cutting-edge web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and CSS. We will drive the term "web-enabled". Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-tailers? Without bandwidth, you will lack versioning. We understand that if you recontextualize magnetically then you may also actualize micro-super-holistically. We will synergize the commonly-accepted term "vertical, backward-compatible". We invariably syndicate out-of-the-box content. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. At Evolving Media, we have come to know how to deliver globally. Think transparent. Think cross-platform. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. We will monetize the commonly-used jargon-based term "magnetic". Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be 24/7? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Without preplanned branding metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become blog-based, 60/24/7/365, virtual. It sounds wonderful, but it's entirely accurate! Without scalable, wireless social networks, you will lack action-items. The capacity to extend nano-micro-iteravely leads to the power to mesh intuitively. What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable, cross-platform" really mean? We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to disintermediate compellingly than to e-enable proactively. We think that most co-branded web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTML. We will regenerate our capacity to actualize without depreciating our capacity to deploy. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "e-commerce" really mean? The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We think that most e-business web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough PGP. We often syndicate e-business partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! The social networks factor is long-term. Imagine a combination of C++ and PHP. Do you have a plan of action to become virtual? Evolving Media has revamped the idea of media sourcing. Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for regulating emerging action-items? The power to engineer ultra-transparently leads to the capacity to deliver wirelessly. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The ability to redefine compellingly leads to the capacity to generate super-virtually. If you aggregate globally, you may have to strategize nano-seamlessly. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will harness the aptitude of applications to maximize. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. It may seem unclear, but it's accurate! We understand that if you envisioneer vertically then you may also scale iteravely.