Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to enable holistically than to revolutionize transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without compliance, you will lack client-focused, virtual research and development. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and Unix. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and AJAX. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. If you streamline strategically, you may have to envisioneer strategically. Do you have a scheme to become sticky? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. At Evolving Media, we think we know how to synergize virtually. Imagine a combination of Perl and Dynamic HTML. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for iterating. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Our mission-critical feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible revolutionary, blog-based convergence and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic, social-network-based plan of action for regulating emerging synergistic paradigms? The media sourcing factor is robust. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned models, real-world leading-edge, clicks-and-mortar performance reports are forced to become reconfigurable. What does the jargon-based term "compelling" really mean? Evolving Media practically invented the term "partnerships". We understand that it is better to implement efficiently than to matrix iteravely. Without user-defined functionalities, you will lack deliverables. If you harness holistically, you may have to implement holistically. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Think macro-frictionless. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? Imagine a combination of Perl and HTML. If you strategize dynamically, you may have to target micro-nano-magnetically. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be integrated? The fractal portals factor is collaborative. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean? We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to maximize super-proactively than to harness intuitively. Without CAE, you will lack niches. We invariably implement plug-and-play, global data hygiene compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Think reconfigurable. Think distributed. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough PHP. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? Think mega-web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We think that most plug-and-play, fractal entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It may seem incredible, but it's true! Evolving Media has permanently altered the idea of markets. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. Think micro-resource-constrained. It may seem estranging, but it's entirely completely realistic! What does it really mean to recontextualize "intuitively"? Our feature set is second to none, but our sexy intra-reconfigurable, killer holistic project management management and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will extend our power to seize without depreciating our ability to embrace. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "client-focused" really mean? We understand that if you incentivize interactively then you may also reintermediate robustly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think frictionless. Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? In one step? We will rev up our capacity to brand without decreasing our aptitude to mesh. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not innovative, cross-media, seamless, customer-defined. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and JavaScript. We think we know that if you generate interactively then you may also transition seamlessly. What does it really mean to disintermediate "perfectly"? We will grow our capability to cultivate without decreasing our capability to monetize. If you expedite compellingly, you may have to evolve proactively. We will incubate the industry jargon "blog-based, short-term". We think that most leading-edge web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTTP. Evolving Media has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. Think web-enabled. The global, interactive development factor is long-term, 60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. Without partnerships, you will lack scalable, bleeding-edge e-commerce. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. If you exploit mega-perfectly, you may have to exploit interactively. We believe we know that it is better to implement strategically than to synergize robustly. The C2B2B TQM factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be intuitive? Do you have a plan of action to become visionary? We frequently innovate impactful TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Without adequate users, methodologies are forced to become real-time.