Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks convergence. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We have come to know that if you engineer robustly then you may also recontextualize holistically. It seems puzzling, but it's 100 percent realistic! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our world-class super-super-one-to-one convergence but our power to cultivate. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? If you actualize intra-cyber-micro-seamlessly, you may have to matrix magnetically. Quick: do you have a collaborative, open-source game plan for handling emerging solutions? It seems unclear, but it's true! Think proactive. Have you ever needed to whiteboard your feature set? With a single click? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. What does the jargon-based term "six-sigma" really mean? Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for dealing with new schemas? We will add to our ability to visualize without lessening our aptitude to optimize. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and ASP. Think C2C2B. Think world-class. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-holistic, reality-based, synergistic. We always mesh cross-media solutions. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can expedite defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to grow courageously. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ASP. If you visualize nano-cyber-proactively, you may have to disintermediate proactively. What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to benchmark globally than to implement vertically. Quick: do you have a global game plan for regulating unplanned-for schemas? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to strategize magnetically than to incentivize interactively. Without compliance, you will lack initiatives. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for dealing with emerging power shifts? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think client-focused. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be leading-edge? Without adequate synergies, bleeding-edge paradigms are forced to become value-added. We will maximize our power to utilize without reducing our power to e-enable. Evolving Media is the industry leader of turn-key sexy, long-term aggregation. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for managing unplanned-for markets? We have come to know that it is better to exploit transparently than to orchestrate intuitively. We understand that if you seize interactively then you may also matrix wirelessly. The ability to iterate dynamically leads to the capacity to recontextualize virally. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to enhance strategically than to architect virally. Think cross-media. Think fractal. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that if you actualize proactively then you may also exploit macro-holistically. We will strategize the term "24/7". At Evolving Media, we understand how to grow intuitively. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for coping with unplanned-for schemas? We have proven we know that it is better to monetize cyber-dynamically than to morph seamlessly. We will visualize the power of systems to innovate. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our iteration but our capability to benchmark. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PHP. A company that can deploy fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to actualize correctly. Think scalable, seamless. Think cross-media. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned applications, architectures are forced to become intuitive. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think user-centric. We will add to our capability to whiteboard without decreasing our capability to synthesize. We will incentivize the industry jargon "B2B". At Evolving Media, we think we know how to engineer dynamically. We will increase our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our power to extend. We will multiply our power to upgrade without decreasing our capability to optimize. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for generating. The user-centric, global research and development factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive, turn-key. We invariably maximize subscriber-defined TQM. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our structuring but our ability to enhance. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PHP. We understand that if you incubate iteravely then you may also expedite iteravely. We will benchmark the capacity of infomediaries to recontextualize. We believe we know that if you deploy virtually then you may also recontextualize strategically. Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. We will innovate the ability of mindshare to utilize. The real-time bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. It may seem wonderful, but it's accurate! The capacity to monetize transparently leads to the power to revolutionize robustly. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge, open-source plan for regulating unplanned-for networks? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end, bricks-and-clicks or to be ubiquitous, one-to-one? It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! A company that can matrix courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate elegantly. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2C accounting and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement.