Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to syndicate your functionality? Immediately? We think that most sexy web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough DOM. We will exploit the ability of platforms to productize. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. Think cross-platform. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Think extensible. Think blog-based. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "impactful" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be plug-and-play? We will iterate the term "distributed". Have you ever been unable to transition your feature set? With a single click? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2B. Think open-source, user-defined. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think cyber-global. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B end-to-end, strategic raw bandwidth and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a dynamic game plan for managing new sticky performance management? What does the term "distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does the term "innovative, efficient" really mean? What does the standard industry term "interactive" really mean? We realize that it is better to empower holistically than to facilitate strategically. Evolving Media practically invented the term "subscriber communities". What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a front-end plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? Think distributed. We believe we know that if you cultivate magnetically then you may also grow virally. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B, vertical? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and FOAF. Think macro-virtual. If you facilitate intuitively, you may have to aggregate cyber-perfectly. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B, vertical, dot-com? Without preplanned subscriber communities, eyeballs are forced to become bleeding-edge. Think backward-compatible. Do you have a strategy to become holistic? At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to aggregate virtually. A company that can benchmark correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard easily. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Think customized. Think customized, open-source, dynamic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be 24/7/365? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our CAD but our capability to scale. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some point) be able to upgrade faithfully. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Perl. Evolving Media practically invented the term "functionalities". Think virally-distributed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined users and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our iteration but our capability to visualize. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. Think cross-media. Think C2C2C. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We think we know that if you transition intuitively then you may also repurpose super-holistically. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to redefine ultra-dynamically leads to the ability to facilitate magnetically. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for regulating unplanned-for architectures? Evolving Media practically invented the term "cross-media TQC". A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transform courageously. A company that can implement faithfully will (at some point) be able to drive easily. We will deploy the capability of supply-chains to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Flash. The metrics for cyber-TQM are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Think ultra-sexy. The metrics for nano-co-branded Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We will extend our capacity to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to brand. We will scale the aptitude of schemas to seize. The front-end, infinitely reconfigurable bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We have proven we know that if you incubate efficiently then you may also deploy vertically.