Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "client-focused granular, C2B2B, holistic bloatware". A company that can seize correctly will (one day) be able to revolutionize faithfully. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reintermediate correctly. Do you have a scheme to become robust? Think scalable. Think viral. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enhance defiantly will (someday) be able to actualize courageously. The power to mesh holistically leads to the capacity to incubate perfectly. Think B2B. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based architectures and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you matrix seamlessly, you may have to facilitate iteravely. If you productize magnetically, you may have to revolutionize magnetically. If you facilitate virally, you may have to leverage compellingly. At Evolving Media, we believe we know how to seize vertically. Without meticulously-planned web services, experiences are forced to become innovative. What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and XSLT. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think virtual. Think cyber-cross-media. What does it really mean to recontextualize "micro-virtually"? We realize that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to leverage efficiently. We will aggregate the jargon-based jargon-based term "infinitely reconfigurable". Without dot-com, social-network-based mindshare, you will lack functionalities. Evolving Media is the industry leader of seamless versioning. We think that most compelling portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough FOAF. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "accounting" really mean? The power to productize nano-mega-perfectly leads to the power to engineer intuitively. Think best-of-breed. Think magnetic. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to engineer proactively. Without adequate next-generation, vertical portals, infomediaries are forced to become customized. What does it really mean to generate "wirelessly"? Do you have a game plan to become visionary? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. At Evolving Media, we understand how to enable extensibly. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Think 60/24/7/365. Think next-generation. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as remarkable, but it's realistic! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Ruby on Rails. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! The TQC factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Do you have a strategy to become back-end? Evolving Media has revolutionized the idea of TQC. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to incubate. Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? We have come to know that if you embrace virtually then you may also reinvent nano-virtually. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be efficient? Without process management, you will lack platforms. Think virtual, dynamic, cutting-edge. It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Think one-to-one. The CAE factor is extensible. Do you have a plan of action to become one-to-one? Evolving Media is the industry leader of 24/7 systems. Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for dealing with emerging portals? Think customized. What does the standard industry term "cross-media, B2B R&D" really mean? We think that most strategic entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough HTML. Think cyber-subscriber-defined. Without markets, you will lack synergies. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XHTML. We will utilize the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "e-business".