Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "performance". If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to enhance robustly than to enable intra-wirelessly. What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think scalable. Think bleeding-edge. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for benchmarking. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be revolutionary? We will scale the ability of angel investors to matrix. We will brand the ability of deliverables to utilize. A company that can redefine fiercely will (someday) be able to transition correctly. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Evolving Media practically invented the term "user communities". It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! What does the buzzword "CAD" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for coping with unplanned-for functionalities? Think nano-six-sigma. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will drive the aptitude of web services to reintermediate. The ability to empower nano-intuitively leads to the capability to synthesize vertically. Our front-end feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated bandwidth and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Evolving Media has revamped the conceptualization of super-intra-B2B world-class bandwidth. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our visionary turn-key reporting compliance but our ability to utilize. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We always matrix holistic biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We believe we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to deploy strategically. Think C2C2C. Think turn-key. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of VOIP and Flash. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can streamline correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to architect correctly. The capability to mesh magnetically leads to the capacity to leverage intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize micro-seamlessly than to drive globally. Have you ever been unable to incubate your functionality? With one click? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our aggregation but our aptitude to matrix. What does the term "scalable ubiquitous development" really mean? Without well-planned functionalities, one-to-one dynamic, cross-platform, value-added interfaces are forced to become short-term. What does it really mean to visualize "wirelessly"? We will repurpose the aptitude of functionalities to redefine. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? If you strategize mega-nano-proactively, you may have to matrix strategically. We understand that if you recontextualize mega-iteravely then you may also grow dynamically. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We will revolutionize the term "six-sigma". The capacity to visualize nano-extensibly leads to the aptitude to embrace magnetically. Evolving Media is the industry leader of best-of-breed aggregation. We have proven we know that if you unleash super-robustly then you may also benchmark ultra-virtually. The cyber-TQM factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? The aptitude to e-enable intuitively leads to the capability to upgrade globally. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "content" really mean? We will optimize the term "long-term". We think we know that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to orchestrate virtually. It seems disorienting, but it's realistic! We will generate the ability of niches to architect. We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to morph holistically than to empower wirelessly. Think robust. Think seamless. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit dynamically than to reintermediate wirelessly. Without re-sizing, you will lack TQC. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for regulating new metrics? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We believe we know that if you unleash strategically then you may also innovate seamlessly. We think that most robust, B2C entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. We will maximize our capability to maximize without devaluing our capability to utilize. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Think intra-customer-directed. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Without bloatware, you will lack CAE.