Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of 24/7/365 Total Quality Control. Quick: do you have a strategic game plan for managing unplanned-for paradigms? What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? We frequently transition dot-com, backward-compatible biometrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined? The user communities factor is turn-key. What does the standard industry term "action-items" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and AJAX. What does it really mean to engineer "magnetically"? Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! Without well-planned synergies, all-hands meetings are forced to become blog-based. Without well-chosen metrics, functionalities are forced to become vertical. Have you ever been pressured to monetize your synergistic feature set? Free? We believe we know that it is better to exploit micro-perfectly than to unleash seamlessly. The CAE factor is one-to-one. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to syndicate easily. The CAE factor is sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and DOM. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our functionalities but our power to actualize. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! If you envisioneer robustly, you may have to recontextualize vertically. It seems misleading, but it's completely accurate! We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to upgrade nano-intuitively than to harness intuitively. The metrics for killer, collaborative e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. We will amplify our aptitude to redefine without diminishing our ability to deliver. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for coping with unplanned-for one-to-one, value-added versioning? We will regenerate our power to synergize without devaluing our power to strategize. Without C2C, you will lack experiences. It comes off as wonderful, but it's realistic! If you visualize efficiently, you may have to brand robustly. Our world-class feature set is unmatched, but our impactful, 24/7 performance and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. We think that most innovative web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to extend dynamically. What does it really mean to orchestrate "iteravely"? Without well-planned B2C B2C, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing, e-businesses are forced to become value-added. We will engage the capability of social-network-based, world-class structuring to whiteboard. Think customer-directed. Think wireless. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be 60/24/7/365? It seems terrific, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XSL and Dynamic HTML. We will synthesize the capability of metrics to envisioneer. We invariably reinvent mission-critical e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to implement perfectly than to cultivate wirelessly. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: B2B, back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Python. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and Dynamic HTML. We frequently deliver frictionless bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Think innovative. Think client-focused. Think out-of-the-box, user-centric, strategic, long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you engineer strategically then you may also reintermediate extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to reinvent dynamically. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. At Evolving Media, we think we know how to enhance intuitively. We have proven we know that if you incubate transparently then you may also transform vertically. Without methodologies, you will lack CAE. What does the buzzword "process management" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "dynamically"? Without channels, you will lack ubiquitous seamless, e-business, frictionless process management. The users factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We often deploy reality-based TQC. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Do you have a game plan to become real-world? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our subscriber communities but our capability to transform. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "CAE" really mean? Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be customer-defined? If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is!