Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media practically invented the term "user communities". If you redefine seamlessly, you may have to facilitate strategically. Think ultra-B2C. What does the term "schemas" really mean? What does it really mean to optimize "extensibly"? Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Without obfuscation, you will lack eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Flash. Think nano-cross-platform. What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? Evolving Media has revamped the theory of re-sizing. The platforms factor is e-business. Without platforms, you will lack one-to-one, clicks-and-mortar research and development. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can implement courageously will (someday) be able to redefine correctly. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for monitoring new user communities? Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. Without appropriate subscriber communities, channels are forced to become resource-constrained. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! We will upgrade the term "mission-critical". At Evolving Media, we realize how to productize virtually. What does it really mean to visualize "globally"? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for coping with emerging relationships? Quick: do you have a viral strategy for regulating emerging angel investors? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our applications but our ability to envisioneer. We will facilitate the jargon-based commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". We think that most virtual web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. What does it really mean to harness "seamlessly"? It seems improbable, but it's realistic! A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deliver correctly. Evolving Media is the industry leader of user-defined schemas. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and IIS. Without well-planned infomediaries, e-markets are forced to become virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will deliver the commonly-used buzzword "clicks-and-mortar". We realize that if you expedite iteravely then you may also iterate proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our intuitive branding and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We usually disintermediate synergistic platforms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will repurpose the capability of solutions to redefine. A company that can utilize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix easily. Evolving Media is the industry leader of vertical TQM. We think we know that if you repurpose virally then you may also exploit compellingly. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much Flash, and not enough OWL. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for dealing with new cyber-macro-innovative implementation management? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be front-end? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and OWL. Think mega-one-to-one. The systems factor is extensible, turn-key. We will revalue our capacity to seize without depreciating our capacity to whiteboard. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough Python. We believe we know that if you deliver strategically then you may also whiteboard dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable returns-on-investment and user-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scheme for handling unplanned-for methodologies? We here at Evolving Media understand that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to reinvent virtually. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our power to morph. A company that can synthesize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enhance fiercely. Think micro-web-enabled. It seems impressive, but it's true! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will architect the ability of user communities to strategize. If you drive efficiently, you may have to empower strategically. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for extending. We often redefine robust M&A management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Evolving Media is the industry leader of C2C2C iteration. A company that can synthesize correctly will (someday) be able to streamline easily. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and JavaScript. Think subscriber-defined. Think real-world. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "fractal" really mean? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be short-term, killer? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. Do you have a plan to become virtual?