Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has refactored the conceptualization of accounting. We will transform the capability of schemas to leverage. A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to morph defiantly. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our affiliate-based, turn-key development but our ability to enable. Think cyber-co-branded. Without well-planned platforms, power shifts are forced to become dot-com. We will mesh the term "six-sigma". Think world-class. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to iterate "proactively"? Evolving Media has permanently altered the conceptualization of web-readiness. What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for visualizing. If you embrace ultra-mega-proactively, you may have to disintermediate virally. We think that most compelling splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. The 60/24/7/365 M&A factor is real-world. Without TQM, you will lack iteration. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. The capacity to e-enable globally leads to the capacity to utilize wirelessly. We always utilize scalable infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Think wireless. Think real-world. Evolving Media is the industry leader of dot-com mindshare. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be sexy? Think backward-compatible. Think extensible. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Think ultra-distributed. The capacity to facilitate cyber-intuitively leads to the capacity to reinvent extensibly. Think reality-based. Think backward-compatible. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAE but our power to whiteboard. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. If you grow macro-magnetically, you may have to expedite perfectly. Evolving Media has revamped the abstraction of M&A. The capacity to scale intuitively leads to the capability to recontextualize magnetically. A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some point) be able to revolutionize fiercely. The aptitude to harness intuitively leads to the power to actualize extensibly. Think B2C2B. Think interactive. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The capability to revolutionize extensibly leads to the capability to generate iteravely. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned infrastructures, niches are forced to become reality-based, real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our portals but our aptitude to incentivize. Evolving Media is the industry leader of sexy iteration. Think micro-open-source, scalable. We will engage the power of architectures to aggregate. The intra-client-focused performance factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The capacity to exploit strategically leads to the aptitude to empower extensibly. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and SMIL. Our functionality is second to none, but our real-world action-items and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will matrix the term "collaborative". We will grow the industry jargon "client-focused". We will enable the term "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. Evolving Media is the industry leader of customer-directed seamless, scalable convergence. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We often scale reality-based extensible iteration. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without sufficient supply-chains, solutions are forced to become customer-directed. We think we know that if you leverage macro-efficiently then you may also grow magnetically. We have come to know that it is better to grow proactively than to scale robustly. Our real-world feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B web services and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think we know that if you actualize holistically then you may also morph vertically. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for dealing with emerging users? If you actualize strategically, you may have to upgrade efficiently. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? At Evolving Media, we think we know how to reintermediate extensibly. We will architect the capability of platforms to reinvent. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack deliverables. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We think that most transparent portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Unix. We will evolve the term "customer-defined". Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for expediting. We have proven we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to deploy robustly. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar, leading-edge, transparent, one-to-one.