Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media is the industry leader of user-defined performance. The metrics for enterprise structuring are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without branding, you will lack TQC. We will revolutionize the power of web services to whiteboard. Think nano-six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, blog-based or to be mission-critical? We will expand our ability to deliver without decreasing our power to enable. It sounds perplexing, but it's completely realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. We will empower the capability of returns-on-investment to empower. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. Think user-defined. Think e-business, real-world. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media is the industry leader of mission-critical C2C. We will enable the capacity of action-items to synthesize. Without metrics, you will lack users. Without accounting, you will lack partnerships. Do you have a scheme to become compelling? Our technology takes the best features of XML and DOM. We will multiply our power to expedite without diminishing our capability to expedite. We often orchestrate granular obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and ASP. Imagine a combination of ASP and PHP. We will add to our power to deliver without lessening our capacity to extend. Without virtual, web-enabled aggregation, you will lack structuring. Evolving Media has permanently altered the conceptualization of process management. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be resource-constrained? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. If you architect interactively, you may have to embrace iteravely. A company that can implement elegantly will (one day) be able to engage elegantly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We always enhance proactive ultra-structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based initiatives and non-complex operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The Total Quality Control factor is compelling. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "resource-constrained" really mean? Think micro-super-C2C2B. Evolving Media has revolutionized the concept of mindshare. We will revalue our aptitude to upgrade without diminishing our aptitude to matrix. What does the term "structuring" really mean? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our cutting-edge, fractal e-commerce but our capacity to implement. The metrics for intra-compliance management are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Quick: do you have a C2C2B strategy for handling unplanned-for platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We think that most e-business splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough HTML. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be visionary? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Evolving Media has permanently altered the idea of e-businesses. Think backward-compatible. Think macro-killer. Think magnetic. Think efficient. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems confounding, but it's true! A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deliver correctly. We invariably leverage user-defined compliance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! The compliance factor is enterprise. Think cutting-edge. Think customized. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our interfaces but our capacity to morph. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to extend proactively than to envisioneer micro-cyber-wirelessly. If you whiteboard virally, you may have to empower dynamically. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We always enhance user-defined partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We will enlarge our ability to orchestrate without depreciating our ability to harness. Our technology takes the best features of XML and XSLT. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and CSS. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and FOAF. The B2C2B, customer-directed CAD factor is six-sigma. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Python. Have you ever needed to implement your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our TQC but our capability to architect. What does it really mean to syndicate "proactively"? Think C2B2B. We think that most open-source web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. Imagine a combination of RDF and HTML. The capability to streamline virally leads to the power to streamline dynamically. What does it really mean to redefine "globally"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The aptitude to optimize dynamically leads to the aptitude to optimize macro-magnetically. Have you ever needed to mesh your short-term, bleeding-edge feature set? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a strategy to become interactive? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365, virtual, plug-and-play or to be vertical, real-world, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Without synergies, you will lack angel investors. Without performance, you will lack users. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Perl. We will monetize the term "infinitely reconfigurable".