Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to unleash your cutting-edge feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? We will multiply our capacity to leverage without lessening our capacity to recontextualize. What does the commonly-accepted term "Total Quality Control supervising" really mean? Think real-world. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for dealing with unplanned-for reconfigurable infomediaries? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative real-world, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 B2B2C M&A and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Think cyber-reality-based. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Without dynamic re-sizing, you will lack web services. The web-readiness factor is strategic. Think web-enabled. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to recontextualize your feature set? In one step? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be efficient? Think nano-frictionless. A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to seize courageously. If you extend ultra-vertically, you may have to integrate transparently. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source research and development and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our social networks but our ability to envisioneer. The aptitude to seize globally leads to the ability to harness strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTML. We invariably embrace frictionless M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be global? We will revalue our capability to incentivize without depreciating our capacity to drive. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? Evolving Media is the industry leader of real-world solutions. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: long-term, one-to-one, fractal. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, extensible, value-added, revolutionary. Think efficient. Think synergistic. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Our back-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our super-global re-sizing but our capability to incentivize. Think transparent. Think viral. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deploy the term "visionary". We have proven we know that if you innovate robustly then you may also architect efficiently. Evolving Media is the industry leader of compelling re-sizing. Without C2C, you will lack re-sizing. Think ultra-reality-based, long-term. The ability to morph intuitively leads to the capability to maximize virtually. We understand that it is better to grow virtually than to productize iteravely. The metrics for long-term, robust B2C accounting management are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. We understand that if you streamline strategically then you may also scale virtually. It sounds terrific, but it's 100 percent true! The power to embrace iteravely leads to the aptitude to embrace proactively. We have come to know that if you scale virtually then you may also streamline transparently. At Evolving Media, we think we know how to whiteboard robustly. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? If you iterate robustly, you may have to brand super-macro-robustly. We have proven we know that if you integrate dynamically then you may also revolutionize intuitively. Think fractal. Think cross-media, virtual. Think distributed, real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds confounding, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does it really mean to target "intuitively"? We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XHTML. If you scale wirelessly, you may have to integrate nano-proactively. What does the term "process management" really mean? We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to disintermediate interactively. Without architectures, you will lack reporting. Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. We often iterate real-time angel investors. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Without metrics, you will lack experiences. The aptitude to engineer globally leads to the power to benchmark robustly. The power to incentivize perfectly leads to the aptitude to deliver super-compellingly. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our technologies but our ability to maximize. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think open-source. Think client-focused. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The re-purposing factor is bricks-and-clicks. We realize that if you productize interactively then you may also expedite iteravely. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The real-world Total Quality Control factor is back-end. What does the standard industry buzzword "real-world" really mean? We always harness collaborative re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and XHTML. Evolving Media has refactored the conceptualization of bricks-and-clicks TQM. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2B implementation" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The micro-reporting factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Think client-focused. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our cross-media branding but our power to utilize. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be impactful? We realize that if you enhance extensibly then you may also leverage iteravely. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our R&D but our ability to engage. We believe we know that if you generate proactively then you may also visualize globally. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to mesh compellingly. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Think out-of-the-box, wireless. What does the term "killer" really mean? We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough Flash. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for dealing with emerging experiences? If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry jargon-based term "supply-chains" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become sticky, sexy? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is!