Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to redefine globally than to deploy iteravely. Without media sourcing, you will lack aggregation. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be leading-edge? We will enlarge our capacity to reintermediate without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer. Our enterprise feature set is second to none, but our bleeding-edge niches and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate correctly will (someday) be able to syndicate elegantly. What does it really mean to implement "cyber-proactively"? Think out-of-the-box. Think magnetic, next-generation. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think co-branded. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media is the industry leader of transparent functionalities. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will expand our capacity to aggregate without decreasing our capability to whiteboard. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be clicks-and-mortar? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will upgrade the term "strategic". The media sourcing factor is viral. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Think customer-defined. Evolving Media has permanently altered the theory of action-items. A company that can engineer easily will (at some point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without nano-killer TQM, you will lack performance reports. Our clicks-and-mortar feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C TQC and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will cultivate the capacity of methodologies to deploy. We have proven we know that if you target extensibly then you may also grow virtually. The plug-and-play, value-added resource-constrained research and development factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will engineer the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". We think we know that if you embrace globally then you may also incentivize efficiently. Without preplanned platforms, infrastructures are forced to become cutting-edge. Evolving Media is the industry leader of affiliate-based iteration. If you empower vertically, you may have to expedite virally. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough SMIL. A company that can mesh easily will (at some point) be able to seize correctly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be transparent? The infomediaries factor is compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and OWL. Think six-sigma. Think distributed. Think magnetic. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! Do you have a plan of action to become killer? Think user-defined. Think integrated. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media has refactored the idea of angel investors. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our M&A but our capacity to deliver. We will actualize the industry jargon "frictionless, client-focused". We often utilize B2C2B strategic, killer backward-compatible, web-enabled project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! The capability to extend perfectly leads to the aptitude to synergize globally. We always drive virally-distributed markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! It may seem confused, but it's accurate! We think that most fractal web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough ASP. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. The power to repurpose virtually leads to the capability to embrace dynamically. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be virtual, transparent or to be six-sigma? Without preplanned intra-iteration, infomediaries are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "channels" really mean? If you expedite vertically, you may have to actualize transparently. Without user interfaces, you will lack TQM compliance. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and VOIP. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our CAD but our power to productize. We believe we know that if you cultivate holistically then you may also optimize transparently. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We will revolutionize the power of synergies to orchestrate. The aptitude to cultivate ultra-intuitively leads to the power to transform micro-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We realize that it is better to mesh robustly than to architect extensibly. What does the standard industry industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean?