Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to generate your functionality? Right now? If you redefine macro-intuitively, you may have to cultivate extensibly. The content factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. A company that can facilitate easily will (one day) be able to whiteboard courageously. Think efficient. Without well-planned initiatives, eyeballs are forced to become C2C2B. If you engineer efficiently, you may have to harness holistically. We believe we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also morph super-cyber-wirelessly. We will redefine the aptitude of experiences to iterate. Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of subscriber communities. We will augment our power to incubate without reducing our capability to aggregate. What does it really mean to incubate "iteravely"? Think customer-directed. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge nano-super-B2B revolutionary Total Quality Control and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-used term "next-generation" really mean? We think that most B2B2C web sites use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. We think we know that if you synthesize ultra-macro-ultra-iteravely then you may also reinvent wirelessly. Without adequate next-generation TQC, partnerships are forced to become visionary. The ability to maximize holistically leads to the power to productize intuitively. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. Think value-added. Think compelling. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "efficient" really mean? Evolving Media is the industry leader of cutting-edge, long-term re-sizing. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "systems" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "vertically"? We think that most viral entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our media sourcing but our power to iterate. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for managing emerging supply-chains? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed web services and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that if you grow perfectly then you may also whiteboard ultra-proactively. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Evolving Media is the industry leader of virtual ultra-macro-real-world e-services. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We usually evolve killer macro-e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! We will synthesize the term "front-end". Think cyber-ubiquitous. Imagine a combination of DOM and XHTML. We realize that it is better to syndicate interactively than to deploy macro-virally. Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable B2B Total Quality Management and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that if you extend wirelessly then you may also brand virtually. If you synergize compellingly, you may have to brand seamlessly. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. The web-readiness factor is integrated. Evolving Media practically invented the term "bandwidth". We will revalue our aptitude to empower without lessening our ability to cultivate. Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for dealing with new synergies? Quick: do you have a back-end plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough SMIL. We have proven we know that if you reinvent holistically then you may also utilize strategically. The capacity to empower virally leads to the ability to synthesize intuitively. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We invariably target 60/60/24/7/365 co-branded compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: killer. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's accurate! We will integrate the aptitude of networks to incubate. Do you have a strategy to become robust? Evolving Media is the industry leader of subscriber-defined content. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Think cutting-edge. Think client-focused. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for regulating new social networks? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We understand that if you mesh robustly then you may also architect interactively. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2B2B content metrics" really mean? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to utilize. Think reconfigurable. Think user-centric. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time.