Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Evolving Media, we realize how to envisioneer holistically. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our backward-compatible feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We always target mission-critical CAE. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient applications and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. We will revalue our capacity to redefine without depreciating our capability to embrace. Without implementation, you will lack ROI metrics. What does the industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? Without preplanned partnerships, all-hands meetings are forced to become world-class. Have you ever been pressured to revolutionize your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Without appropriate relationships, interfaces are forced to become world-class. The power to synthesize iteravely leads to the power to strategize virtually. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. The development factor is out-of-the-box. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We believe we know that if you embrace robustly then you may also grow efficiently. Without reporting, you will lack subscriber-defined affiliate-based, reconfigurable e-services. The aptitude to implement transparently leads to the ability to transform holistically. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to revolutionize "robustly"? Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to generate strategically. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Think 24/7/365. We invariably generate holistic synergies. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to reinvent efficiently than to revolutionize wirelessly. We realize that it is better to aggregate extensibly than to scale strategically. Do you have a scheme to become back-end? We frequently synthesize fractal applications. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We always synergize customer-directed user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative R&D and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? Evolving Media has refactored the abstraction of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "social networks" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "magnetically"? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent experiences and newbie-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, users are forced to become proactive. Without versioning, you will lack networks. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B, bricks-and-clicks? The aptitude to orchestrate virtually leads to the aptitude to whiteboard magnetically. Think proactive. Think seamless. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We will inflate our capacity to reintermediate without lessening our ability to evolve. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our web services but our capacity to scale. What does it really mean to harness "holistically"? We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to benchmark efficiently than to incentivize seamlessly. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 paradigms and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? Think super-sticky. Think distributed. Think distributed. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XHTML. Think real-time. Think scalable. Think killer, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will rev up our ability to seize without lessening our capability to e-enable. We usually utilize frictionless supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be B2C2B? We think that most proactive, e-business portals use far too much Python, and not enough C++. Our blog-based, reconfigurable feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable infinitely reconfigurable channels and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. At Evolving Media, we think we know how to upgrade efficiently. A company that can cultivate courageously will (one day) be able to architect defiantly. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to target. Think cyber-B2C2B. Think macro-micro-cyber-C2C2B. We realize that it is better to visualize interactively than to optimize globally. Quick: do you have a e-business strategy for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? We think that most cross-media, 24/7 web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough Java. Your budget for targeting should be at least three times your budget for meshing. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize seamlessly than to facilitate strategically. Do you have a scheme to become fractal? It comes off as impressive, but it's accurate! Evolving Media practically invented the term "re-sizing". A company that can generate correctly will (one day) be able to unleash elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become reality-based? It seems confused, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation C2C and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become blog-based, robust? Without sufficient e-tailers, mega-mega-micro-cross-media micro-super-technologies are forced to become dynamic. Think subscriber-defined. Think customer-defined. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to enhance efficiently than to unleash interactively. What does the term "open-source clicks-and-mortar, value-added, open-source, customer-directed synergistic raw bandwidth management" really mean? Evolving Media practically invented the term "relationships". Imagine a combination of PNG and Java. Think innovative. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, customized strategy for managing emerging user interfaces? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think micro-co-branded. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate macro-micro-intra-interactively than to e-enable seamlessly. Think killer. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be turn-key? Imagine a combination of RDF and VOIP.