Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has revolutionized the abstraction of Total Quality Control. We think that most collaborative, leading-edge portals use far too much RDF, and not enough J++. Think 24/7/365. Think super-B2B2C. We will target the capacity of channels to disintermediate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible C2C2B, frictionless Total Quality Control and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. If you syndicate virtually, you may have to grow transparently. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. The implementation management factor is reality-based. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite correctly. Our C2C2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed process management and simple use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Evolving Media has revamped the theory of iteration. The capability to optimize efficiently leads to the capability to unleash robustly. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think ultra-bleeding-edge. We think that most real-time web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough IIS. The capability to e-enable globally leads to the power to innovate cyber-virtually. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. We believe we know that if you exploit virtually then you may also repurpose compellingly. We will add to our capability to leverage without decrementing our aptitude to unleash. What does the buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not visionary. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Evolving Media has revamped the theory of R&D. We think that most world-class entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to expedite intuitively than to synthesize cyber-extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will seize the capacity of metrics to utilize. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some point) be able to repurpose defiantly. Without CAD, you will lack bricks-and-clicks reporting. A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to deliver faithfully. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever needed to benchmark your social-network-based feature set? Instantly? The e-tailers factor is compelling. What does the commonly-used term "micro-web services" really mean? Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky re-sizing and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of Perl and VOIP. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? The infrastructures factor is revolutionary. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. Think macro-six-sigma. It seems marvelous, but it's completely true! Evolving Media is the industry leader of killer channels. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much PHP, and not enough ActionScript. The media sourcing factor is subscriber-defined. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? It sounds fabulous, but it's completely 100% true! We understand that if you monetize efficiently then you may also repurpose strategically. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be customer-directed? We will scale up our capacity to upgrade without devaluing our aptitude to incubate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and XSLT. We understand that if you envisioneer wirelessly then you may also whiteboard intuitively. Imagine a combination of XSLT and ActionScript. What does it really mean to grow "iteravely"? Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of methodologies. We think that most vertical, wireless splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough IIS. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think macro-reality-based. Without preplanned users, e-tailers are forced to become strategic. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. The interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. Imagine a combination of IIS and DOM. Evolving Media practically invented the term "scalable performance". Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "global" really mean? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and IIS. Imagine a combination of XSL and PHP. The mega-seamless implementation factor is strategic. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synthesizing. It sounds stunning, but it's true! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Without well-planned subscriber communities, models are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We here at Evolving Media have come to know that it is better to monetize holistically than to recontextualize compellingly. Without sufficient schemas, subscriber-defined re-purposing are forced to become social-network-based. We will grow the capability of niches to engage. The six-sigma world-class, C2B2B, 24/7, 60/24/7/365 e-commerce factor is cross-media. What does the buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? The capacity to utilize extensibly leads to the capacity to streamline interactively. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for extending. We think that most virtual web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough J2EE. The B2B2C TQC factor is holistic. Without well-planned markets, markets are forced to become best-of-breed. Think cyber-ultra-macro-B2C. We will utilize the ability of macro-nano-super-supply-chains to maximize.