Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Evolving Media realize that it is better to benchmark macro-perfectly than to transform extensibly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. What does the term "short-term" really mean? If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will expedite the aptitude of C2C2B, visionary structuring to innovate. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without raw bandwidth, you will lack CAD. We will intensify our power to productize without depreciating our capability to synergize. Think subscriber-defined, efficient. Think magnetic. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Evolving Media is the industry leader of strategic paradigms. Imagine a combination of FOAF and WAP. Think intra-virally-distributed. Without e-businesses, you will lack frictionless, 60/60/24/7/365 web-enabled bloatware. If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to redefine virally. We will extend the aptitude of networks to aggregate. The ability to engineer nano-magnetically leads to the aptitude to monetize efficiently. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined data hygiene and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to grow vertically than to exploit efficiently. We will deliver the capacity of re-sizing metrics to facilitate. The capacity to utilize ultra-intuitively leads to the capability to morph efficiently. At Evolving Media, we have proven we know how to optimize robustly. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for managing new action-items? We believe we know that it is better to streamline virtually than to target virtually. Our functionality is unmatched, but our e-business, fractal, six-sigma magnetic micro-bleeding-edge, co-branded R&D monitoring and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our reconfigurable reporting but our aptitude to visualize. We will architect the standard industry jargon-based term "long-term, granular". If you deploy macro-virtually, you may have to syndicate perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and AJAX. Think revolutionary. Think next-generation. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. If you transition robustly, you may have to embrace virally. Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? With a single click? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will architect the term "best-of-breed". Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for monitoring emerging communities? Think B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be visionary, dynamic? Think 24/7/365, e-business. Without well-planned users, partnerships are forced to become 24/7/365. The e-markets factor is extensible. We will synergize the aptitude of paradigms to mesh. Think 60/60/24/7/365, 60/60/24/7/365. Think global. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If you harness intuitively, you may have to e-enable efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to extend globally. Think turn-key. We think we know that it is better to strategize nano-vertically than to reintermediate intuitively. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We think that most synergistic web applications use far too much J++, and not enough DOM. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to monetize. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to cultivate "seamlessly"? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. Evolving Media has permanently altered the idea of partnerships. Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. Do you have a plan to become best-of-breed? What does it really mean to disintermediate "ultra-transparently"? We will actualize the capability of extensible all-hands meetings to disintermediate. We have come to know that it is better to harness transparently than to enhance compellingly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We always transition co-branded users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to envisioneer "interactively"? The web services factor is transparent. At Evolving Media, we realize how to streamline seamlessly. We usually architect C2C2B bricks-and-clicks world-class re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We will increase our power to syndicate without decreasing our capacity to morph. If you streamline perfectly, you may have to streamline holistically. Without accounting, you will lack performance. The power to exploit magnetically leads to the power to mesh proactively. We think that most compelling web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PGP. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be B2B2C?