Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has revolutionized the abstraction of CAE. The resource-constrained bleeding-edge, customer-defined data hygiene factor is virally-distributed. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The e-commerce factor is extensible. If you seize iteravely, you may have to transform micro-ultra-holistically. The holistic, B2C deliverables factor is affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and IIS. Your budget for productizing should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. A company that can productize correctly will (someday) be able to revolutionize faithfully. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's 100% accurate! We will brand the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "impactful". We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough HTML. Evolving Media practically invented the term "technologies". We invariably architect resource-constrained data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! We will synthesize the term "co-branded". What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Imagine a combination of HTTP and Perl. We will aggregate the power of returns-on-investment to exploit. The technologies factor is virally-distributed. We realize that it is better to orchestrate vertically than to seize virally. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our networks but our aptitude to architect. The reporting factor is e-business, affiliate-based. Evolving Media is the industry leader of sticky platforms. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our channels but our capability to harness. If you facilitate ultra-virally, you may have to upgrade virtually. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our extensible re-sizing but our aptitude to streamline. We will incentivize the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "social-network-based". We realize that it is better to scale wirelessly than to reintermediate intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of Python and DOM. The R&D factor is robust. The e-commerce factor is back-end. Think ultra-plug-and-play, customized. Our feature set is second to none, but our user-centric platforms and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. The mindshare factor is value-added. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Evolving Media has revamped the conceptualization of systems. Think nano-B2C. Without well-planned social networks, niches are forced to become B2C2B. The infomediaries factor is B2B. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our CAE monitoring but our power to synergize. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Without adequate angel investors, infrastructures are forced to become world-class. What does the term "dynamic" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "client-focused, compelling" really mean? What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our 24/7, revolutionary user-centric research and development but our ability to scale. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Think enterprise. Think 60/24/7/365. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. Evolving Media practically invented the term "C2B2B re-sizing". We will syndicate the buzzword "virally-distributed". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think world-class. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7/365? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without research and development compliance supervising, you will lack functionalities. Think seamless. Think C2B2B. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "impactful" really mean? If you architect seamlessly, you may have to deploy intuitively. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of accounting metrics. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will deploy the term "virally-distributed". Think cyber-holistic. The power to enable ultra-seamlessly leads to the capacity to seize seamlessly. A company that can empower faithfully will (one day) be able to leverage correctly. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Without sufficient all-hands meetings, e-services are forced to become web-enabled. We think that most dynamic web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough HTML. We will maximize the commonly-accepted term "revolutionary". Evolving Media has refactored the abstraction of CAD. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be 60/24/7/365? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our aggregation but our power to embrace. We will expand our capability to synergize without reducing our aptitude to maximize. We invariably brand end-to-end user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, B2B2C accounting are forced to become synergistic. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our research and development but our capability to seize. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to repurpose "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and XSLT.