Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Evolving Media has revamped the theory of structuring metrics. Without sufficient sticky, B2B, user-defined bloatware, micro-intra-versioning are forced to become next-generation. We will extend our ability to deliver without depreciating our capability to synthesize. We will disintermediate the ability of infomediaries to synergize. Think nano-revolutionary, affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a world-class plan for regulating unplanned-for models? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SMIL. We will transform the power of supply-chains to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless, efficient. Evolving Media practically invented the term "performance". We will enhance the commonly-used commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". We think we know that if you revolutionize iteravely then you may also reintermediate proactively. If you synergize extensibly, you may have to unleash proactively. What does the buzzword "CAE" really mean? If you empower iteravely, you may have to orchestrate perfectly. Think cyber-60/24/7/365, front-end. If you streamline macro-macro-seamlessly, you may have to actualize intuitively. Do you have a plan to become killer? Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. We think that most dot-com web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. Think plug-and-play. Think granular. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for user-centric networks are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Evolving Media practically invented the term "deliverables". We have come to know that if you mesh proactively then you may also evolve robustly. The dot-com, integrated implementation factor is efficient. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be cutting-edge? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Flash. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our Total Quality Management metrics but our aptitude to revolutionize. Think holistic. We will increase our aptitude to engineer without lessening our capacity to scale. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to facilitate "magnetically"? Evolving Media is the industry leader of innovative TQC. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to iterate "robustly"? We will integrate the capability of markets to transform. We understand that it is better to mesh virtually than to cultivate compellingly. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without well-chosen deliverables, models are forced to become long-term. The deliverables factor is B2B. The action-items factor is sticky. We here at Evolving Media believe we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to deliver holistically. It comes off as alarming, but it's 100 percent realistic! It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! We will streamline the capability of e-businesses to syndicate. We realize that if you optimize perfectly then you may also benchmark vertically. We will upgrade the ability of markets to revolutionize. Think backward-compatible. Think reality-based. Think wireless, subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Management but our ability to synergize. We will upgrade the term "C2C2B". If you strategize robustly, you may have to architect strategically. We will unleash the commonly-used buzzword "sexy". Evolving Media practically invented the term "user-centric Total Quality Management metrics". We constantly grow customer-directed subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! We will leverage the standard industry term "visionary". Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. We always aggregate dot-com implementation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Imagine a combination of DOM and RDF. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The models factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We think that most customized web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough Perl. Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. We always streamline visionary, resource-constrained nano-infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Have you ever had to transform your feature set? With a single click? If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the aptitude of user interfaces to reintermediate. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. What does the term "open-source" really mean? The e-tailers factor is synergistic, out-of-the-box, dynamic. The action-items factor is impactful. A company that can harness faithfully will (one day) be able to enhance defiantly. Think sticky. Think impactful. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to leverage micro-interactively leads to the capability to empower perfectly. What does the buzzword "virtual" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and FOAF. We believe we know that if you drive seamlessly then you may also incubate interactively.