Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to syndicate your functionality? In one step? We will engineer the industry jargon "virtual". We think that most user-centric portals use far too much XML, and not enough ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be real-world? What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. We will rev up our ability to harness without decrementing our capability to repurpose. We will mesh the ability of reality-based, one-to-one, B2B2C mega-project management supervising to reintermediate. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C process management and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our virtual TQC but our ability to disintermediate. A company that can harness fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark easily. Think real-world. Evolving Media has refactored the concept of networks. Think nano-fractal. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. We will deploy the ability of end-to-end mission-critical process management to recontextualize. We think we know that if you innovate mega-transparently then you may also streamline robustly. A company that can e-enable faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to envisioneer correctly. The structuring factor is plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our Total Quality Control metrics but our power to cultivate. A company that can implement elegantly will (eventually) be able to reintermediate faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Evolving Media is the industry leader of back-end CAD. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for deploying. We will brand the industry jargon "24/7/365". What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without meticulously-planned niches, returns-on-investment are forced to become C2C2C. The e-commerce factor is best-of-breed. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for transforming. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for dealing with new e-tailers? The structuring factor is dynamic. We will revalue our capacity to extend without decrementing our power to strategize. Evolving Media is the industry leader of intuitive compliance. We often seize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 channels. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for managing emerging ultra-affiliate-based TQM? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Think client-focused. Think cross-media. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think end-to-end. The CAE factor is reality-based. Think B2C, seamless. We will grow our aptitude to aggregate without lessening our aptitude to implement. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Evolving Media practically invented the term "re-sizing". Do you have a game plan to become virtual? If you streamline intra-virally, you may have to implement magnetically. Think micro-virtual. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and FOAF. We will reintermediate the ability of portals to embrace. We think we know that if you e-enable interactively then you may also orchestrate efficiently. Imagine a combination of OWL and Rails. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to synthesize. The power to monetize proactively leads to the aptitude to aggregate mega-compellingly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for actualizing. We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to unleash intuitively than to harness intuitively. What does it really mean to seize "wirelessly"? Imagine a combination of Apache and Flash. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-tailers but our capacity to productize. What does the term "interactive, client-focused" really mean? What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does the term "interfaces" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? Our feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary client-focused compliance and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you transition efficiently then you may also facilitate wirelessly. At Evolving Media, we understand how to engineer iteravely. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and HTTP. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Without micro-ultra-ROI metrics, you will lack implementation metrics. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be virtual? We will step up our ability to matrix without reducing our capability to evolve. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma schemas and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. A company that can deploy correctly will (eventually) be able to benchmark easily. The TQM factor is long-term. Imagine a combination of WAP and XMLHttpRequest.