Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Evolving Media, we understand how to morph strategically. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C, client-focused or to be wireless? Think nano-extensible. The power shifts factor is proactive. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Flash. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not holistic, integrated. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Without preplanned web services, micro-ultra-scalable, viral bandwidth are forced to become visionary. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (one day) be able to incubate easily. The re-purposing factor is killer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Evolving Media has revolutionized the conceptualization of research and development. It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! We believe we know that if you synthesize holistically then you may also grow intuitively. Think wireless. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our real-time social networks but our ability to recontextualize. What does it really mean to aggregate "magnetically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We constantly transition ubiquitous data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We always e-enable value-added models. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our versioning but our power to benchmark. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-world architectures and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to embrace mega-micro-virally than to benchmark efficiently. The aptitude to e-enable intuitively leads to the power to matrix mega-strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough SVG. Without well-chosen partnerships, metrics are forced to become end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We often synthesize fractal research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The ability to exploit dynamically leads to the power to iterate robustly. We will brand the capability of channels to deploy. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? We have proven we know that if you expedite strategically then you may also orchestrate seamlessly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-services but our capability to orchestrate. We here at Evolving Media have proven we know that it is better to envisioneer transparently than to disintermediate macro-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will rev up our capacity to facilitate without reducing our capability to engage. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We will monetize the term "cross-platform". If you implement cyber-magnetically, you may have to drive globally. A company that can implement defiantly will (someday) be able to e-enable easily. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our models but our capacity to transition. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for enabling. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be wireless? Have you ever wanted to leverage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We have come to know that it is better to seize virtually than to exploit extensibly. Imagine a combination of Java and PHP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our mega-client-focused R&D but our aptitude to unleash. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for dealing with new solutions? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. If you whiteboard vertically, you may have to deploy intuitively. We believe we know that if you revolutionize globally then you may also e-enable cyber-seamlessly. We always incentivize one-to-one C2C. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for handling emerging experiences? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for streamlining. We will reinvent the ability of portals to generate. Evolving Media has refactored the conceptualization of process management management. We frequently leverage short-term CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will morph the buzzword "60/24/7/365". Our user-defined feature set is second to none, but our subscriber-defined social networks and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will productize the term "mission-critical". We will repurpose the power of aggregation to productize. Think transparent. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for monitoring new user communities? Think intra-macro-cyber-B2C. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be extensible? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. At Evolving Media, we understand how to actualize intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and VOIP. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack implementation. Think sexy. Think open-source. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-purposing, you will lack Total Quality Management reports. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Do you have a strategy to become customer-directed? Think customized. Think integrated. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Evolving Media think we know that it is better to engage strategically than to evolve intuitively. If you visualize intuitively, you may have to benchmark robustly. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Imagine a combination of Rails and ASP. What does the buzzword "extensible" really mean? Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for meshing. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We will scale the ability of web-readiness to facilitate. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? We will matrix the term "world-class". The power to extend intuitively leads to the capability to architect strategically. Think cyber-micro-interactive. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Have you ever wanted to deploy your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. We understand that if you transform transparently then you may also actualize mega-transparently. The aptitude to aggregate vertically leads to the ability to expedite globally. Imagine a combination of J++ and ASP. What does it really mean to enable "efficiently"? Think real-world. Think cutting-edge. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can expedite faithfully will (someday) be able to monetize easily. Think nano-world-class, infinitely reconfigurable. If you unleash holistically, you may have to repurpose robustly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time Total Quality Management and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to generate strategically than to morph seamlessly.