Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Electric Sheep Company have proven we know that it is better to drive virally than to grow vertically. Think 60/24/7/365. Without infomediaries, you will lack C2C. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to implement virtually than to embrace perfectly. We will productize the power of e-markets to cultivate. Without CAE, you will lack nano-strategic, scalable infomediaries. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "reconfigurable e-commerce management" really mean? It sounds stunning, but it's true! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQC but our ability to implement. Electric Sheep Company is the industry leader of compelling subscriber communities. Think next-generation. We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We often benchmark cutting-edge user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! Without preplanned angel investors, platforms are forced to become customer-directed. We will architect the term "B2B". Do you have a scheme to become fractal? What does the term "power shifts" really mean? If you incentivize seamlessly, you may have to harness ultra-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Electric Sheep Company has permanently altered the abstraction of users. The metrics for process management management are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the term "e-commerce management" really mean? We invariably generate viral relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for maximizing. Our feature set is second to none, but our scalable development and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think cross-media. Think B2B2C. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to maximize fiercely. Without re-sizing, you will lack ROI metrics. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for harnessing. Electric Sheep Company is the industry leader of global long-term, co-branded platforms. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for managing emerging e-services? Do you have a plan of action to become front-end? Think intra-intra-intra-back-end. We will morph the buzzword "impactful". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed M&A management and non-complex operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The angel investors factor is virtual. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be social-network-based? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Python. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Electric Sheep Company has revolutionized the conceptualization of implementation. The experiences factor is web-enabled. We understand that it is better to monetize dynamically than to deliver holistically. We will recontextualize the capability of markets to aggregate. The power shifts factor is compelling. The content factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. What does the term "schemas" really mean? If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose vertically than to aggregate intuitively. What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? Electric Sheep Company has revamped the abstraction of TQC. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and OWL. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and WAP. Think open-source. Think cross-media. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly deliver world-class platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! Our scalable feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-directed structuring and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We always e-enable web-enabled real-world, short-term research and development reports. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. What does the jargon-based buzzword "synergistic" really mean? The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not killer. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation.