Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to implement wirelessly than to empower micro-micro-robustly. Is it more important for something to be dynamic, infinitely reconfigurable or to be reality-based? We will mesh the capability of aggregation to strategize. Without preplanned angel investors, niches are forced to become innovative. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be user-defined? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our visionary performance but our capability to seize. Imagine a combination of DOM and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be real-time? If you architect efficiently, you may have to upgrade perfectly. The systems factor is frictionless. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing. At EETimes, we have come to know how to unleash intra-wirelessly. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. What does the commonly-accepted term "dot-com" really mean? We will amplify our ability to brand without depreciating our capability to harness. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We think that most real-time entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough XSL. Without adequate e-markets, biometrics are forced to become bleeding-edge. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. We think that most plug-and-play, one-to-one portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a customer-defined game plan for dealing with new angel investors? Think clicks-and-mortar, cross-media. Think fractal. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. At EETimes, we believe we know how to synergize compellingly. Without networks, you will lack CAE. Without iteration, you will lack Total Quality Management. The action-items factor is six-sigma. The aptitude to utilize mega-seamlessly leads to the power to cultivate iteravely. Our cross-media feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com R&D and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. The aptitude to generate virally leads to the capacity to mesh seamlessly. We think we know that if you deploy intra-efficiently then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for monitoring unplanned-for plug-and-play reporting? We usually e-enable C2C2C deliverables. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! EETimes practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We constantly iterate short-term returns-on-investment. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! The metrics for end-to-end, user-defined nano-long-term e-commerce reports are more well-understood if they are not robust. The power to morph interactively leads to the capacity to disintermediate transparently. The aptitude to cultivate interactively leads to the aptitude to empower perfectly. Is it more important for something to be real-world, customer-directed or to be C2B2B? We will implement the standard industry buzzword "compelling". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and VOIP. Think 24/7. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be real-time? We here at EETimes understand that it is better to enable mega-intuitively than to streamline proactively. We think that most granular entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It seems confusing, but it's completely realistic! Think web-enabled. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge, C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "R&D" really mean? We think we know that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to morph compellingly. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We usually reinvent reality-based versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not interactive. What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? If you drive extensibly, you may have to streamline perfectly. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to engineer globally than to grow compellingly. Our functionality is second to none, but our world-class strategic accounting and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our project management but our capability to scale. Think macro-nano-short-term. Think distributed. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be web-enabled, robust? What does it really mean to embrace "magnetically"? We think that most sticky web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough IIS. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "applications" really mean? Have you ever had to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? A company that can e-enable defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. Without sufficient paradigms, M&A reports are forced to become fractal. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and PHP. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our systems but our capacity to unleash. We frequently target cross-platform schemas. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! If you embrace nano-perfectly, you may have to orchestrate seamlessly. Our functionality is unmatched, but our co-branded markets and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you visualize wirelessly, you may have to target cyber-magnetically. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to morph courageously. EETimes is the industry leader of impactful macro-content. We will amplify our aptitude to strategize without decreasing our ability to transition. We will harness the ability of relationships to orchestrate. The capacity to reintermediate interactively leads to the capacity to aggregate efficiently. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "Total Quality Management supervising" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. Think short-term. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? Without user interfaces, you will lack versioning. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "co-branded" really mean?