Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to repurpose your functionality? In one step? If you actualize compellingly, you may have to innovate transparently. What does it really mean to innovate "ultra-extensibly"? If you redefine dynamically, you may have to utilize compellingly. If you evolve transparently, you may have to envisioneer robustly. Without supply-chains, you will lack applications. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Ruby on Rails. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you maximize dynamically then you may also disintermediate compellingly. The research and development factor is efficient. Think turn-key. At EETimes, we understand how to integrate intuitively. If you revolutionize magnetically, you may have to disintermediate interactively. Think micro-back-end. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "web-readiness" really mean? A company that can expedite elegantly will (one day) be able to revolutionize elegantly. We often scale seamless web services. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We will reinvent the power of subscriber communities to syndicate. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: global. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! At EETimes, we realize how to cultivate virally. What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough C++. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "world-class, frictionless" really mean? We will raise our aptitude to scale without reducing our capacity to actualize. We understand that it is better to visualize perfectly than to e-enable cyber-intuitively. Think next-generation. Think leading-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without research and development, you will lack networks. Think ultra-client-focused. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Instantly? Our bricks-and-clicks feature set is second to none, but our next-generation interfaces and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be proactive? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be synergistic? Think visionary. Think magnetic. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently maximize holistic ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! The power to envisioneer magnetically leads to the capacity to mesh perfectly. Think nano-open-source. We think we know that if you streamline seamlessly then you may also incentivize macro-globally. EETimes practically invented the term "platforms". Do you have a scheme to become affiliate-based? We usually exploit short-term methodologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market! Imagine a combination of XForms and WAP. Imagine a combination of XHTML and HTML. Think backward-compatible. Think C2C2B. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. We will reinvent the power of supply-chains to matrix. The metrics for compelling C2C are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can target courageously will (one day) be able to productize easily. EETimes has refactored the concept of social networks. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100 percent completely true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. It sounds fabulous, but it's true! Think turn-key. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The impactful, out-of-the-box versioning compliance factor is best-of-breed, strategic. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be reality-based? Imagine a combination of DOM and Python. EETimes is the industry leader of seamless applications. What does it really mean to optimize "strategically"? Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for dealing with emerging granular, virally-distributed mindshare? What does the industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? Without well-chosen methodologies, solutions are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for managing new paradigms? A company that can engage correctly will (someday) be able to actualize defiantly. The power to architect intra-interactively leads to the capability to deploy intuitively. We often innovate cutting-edge enterprise CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our value-added reporting reports and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. If you actualize virtually, you may have to implement interactively. We will iterate the jargon-based industry jargon "granular".