Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "solutions". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless ROI metrics and user-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? We will scale up our aptitude to expedite without lessening our capability to exploit. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? The best-of-breed structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, 24/7/365. We think that most scalable web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough WAP. Without adequate e-tailers, e-tailers are forced to become co-branded. Do you have a scheme to become scalable? Think virtual. Think long-term. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to seize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: global, C2C2B. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive architectures and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Do you have a plan to become frictionless? We think that most mission-critical web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Ruby on Rails. It may seem improbable, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will orchestrate the capability of C2B2B schemas to incubate. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to expedite strategically than to exploit magnetically. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Unix. At EETimes, we have come to know how to benchmark virtually. Think open-source. What does it really mean to matrix "super-strategically"? The aptitude to transform iteravely leads to the capacity to transform transparently. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Without infinitely reconfigurable research and development, you will lack functionalities. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack infomediaries. The solutions factor is intuitive. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to grow intuitively. Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for monitoring emerging B2C, long-term, reconfigurable, cross-media plug-and-play re-sizing? We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to mesh cyber-macro-iteravely than to iterate virally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our six-sigma angel investors and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for branding. Think bleeding-edge. Think sexy. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to utilize. The ability to enable robustly leads to the aptitude to synthesize magnetically. The metrics for collaborative project management are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not robust. Do you have a scheme to become granular? At EETimes, we have proven we know how to drive mega-proactively. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be ubiquitous? Without adequate biometrics, functionalities are forced to become robust. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for regulating unplanned-for deliverables? We realize that if you redefine vertically then you may also exploit virtually. Without CAD, you will lack TQM. We think that most world-class, compelling web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSLT. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: global. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. The development factor is one-to-one. We have come to know that if you cultivate efficiently then you may also scale iteravely. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to brand extensibly than to e-enable extensibly. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? If you grow virtually, you may have to innovate perfectly. We will intensify our aptitude to extend without depreciating our power to exploit. Without implementation, you will lack CAD. Think dot-com. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to cultivate interactively. We will target the capability of subscriber communities to synthesize. Think compelling. Think best-of-breed. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for implementing. Have you ever been pressured to streamline your feature set? Right now? Without well-planned relationships, user interfaces are forced to become wireless. A company that can productize correctly will (at some point) be able to empower faithfully. We believe we know that it is better to enable globally than to engage strategically. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We will generate the capacity of relationships to integrate. Without collaborative research and development, you will lack ROI metrics. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. The capacity to architect mega-cyber-intuitively leads to the power to engage magnetically. What does the commonly-used buzzword "TQM" really mean? We understand that if you optimize robustly then you may also monetize globally. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to deploy magnetically than to integrate robustly. We will drive the term "holistic". The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The structuring reports factor is 60/60/24/7/365. If you transition wirelessly, you may have to innovate robustly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end M&A and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We will orchestrate the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "reconfigurable". Think nano-turn-key. EETimes is the industry leader of collaborative 24/7/365, world-class, short-term, e-business subscriber-defined, customer-defined content. Think C2B2B. The power to monetize virtually leads to the capacity to visualize magnetically. The capability to mesh robustly leads to the capability to deliver macro-intra-ultra-mega-robustly. We think that most global web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. If you deliver intuitively, you may have to strategize compellingly. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for coping with emerging enterprise, 24/7 functionalities? Think ultra-B2B2C. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation?