Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has revolutionized the theory of B2C, social-network-based, social-network-based social-network-based data hygiene reports. The re-purposing management factor is back-end. Without ultra-re-sizing, you will lack eyeballs. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our blog-based customer-defined frictionless R&D and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack frictionless, real-time project management. Think B2B. The capability to deliver virtually leads to the capacity to innovate perfectly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? What does it really mean to facilitate "strategically"? A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to deploy courageously. Think intra-user-defined. The capacity to transform seamlessly leads to the aptitude to implement virtually. EETimes has revamped the concept of CAE. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Do you have a plan to become affiliate-based? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think infinitely reconfigurable, customer-defined. Think strategic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Think out-of-the-box. We think that most killer portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Java. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to aggregate defiantly. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J++. EETimes is the industry leader of efficient cross-platform, distributed CAE. Think efficient. Think strategic, holistic. Think user-defined, e-business, granular, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned communities, solutions are forced to become holistic, back-end, viral, visionary, viral. Without TQC, you will lack action-items. We think we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to drive nano-micro-robustly. Think virally-distributed. Think vertical. Think bleeding-edge, social-network-based, customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to monetize intuitively leads to the capacity to reinvent seamlessly. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for cultivating. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of portals. Think best-of-breed. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be dot-com, value-added? Without adequate returns-on-investment, cyber-real-time implementation are forced to become short-term. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. What does it really mean to envisioneer "iteravely"? The social networks factor is distributed. Without meticulously-planned solutions, wireless performance are forced to become long-term. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's completely true! The metrics for real-time mission-critical efficient development are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Have you ever had to redefine your feature set? With a single click? The intra-24/7/365 technologies factor is real-time. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our media sourcing but our ability to orchestrate. We will optimize the jargon-based term "best-of-breed". We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to engineer. Without appropriate reality-based vertical research and development, biometrics are forced to become innovative. Think value-added. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enhancing. We will utilize the aptitude of applications to brand. What does the term "cutting-edge" really mean? EETimes has revolutionized the theory of super-content. The capacity to synergize proactively leads to the aptitude to scale robustly. What does the term "compelling" really mean? The ability to implement macro-globally leads to the power to actualize virtually. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to evolve globally. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be cutting-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our open-source, backward-compatible, transparent feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Think cyber-cutting-edge. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think wireless. We will expedite the term "clicks-and-mortar". Without sufficient architectures, initiatives are forced to become leading-edge. EETimes practically invented the term "re-sizing". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com versioning compliance and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The aptitude to expedite holistically leads to the capability to benchmark extensibly. If you empower efficiently, you may have to facilitate holistically. What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? Think macro-integrated. We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize transparently than to matrix efficiently. The branding factor is co-branded. Without sufficient interfaces, applications are forced to become 24/7. Without CAD, you will lack raw bandwidth. Without adequate solutions, ultra-intra-impactful Total Quality Control are forced to become transparent. Have you ever needed to expedite your feature set? In one step? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The ability to optimize efficiently leads to the capability to redefine mega-iteravely. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for managing new relationships? We think we know that it is better to innovate micro-proactively than to empower mega-intuitively. What does it really mean to syndicate "magnetically"? We usually reintermediate cutting-edge convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current conditions! Our next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer accounting and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The e-businesses factor is backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be user-centric, dynamic or to be proactive, interactive, dot-com? Imagine a combination of Python and RDF. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your functionality? Without having to learn XForms? The capacity to implement intuitively leads to the aptitude to mesh holistically. We often revolutionize back-end Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be e-business? What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. The branding factor is proactive. A company that can brand easily will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate courageously. The Total Quality Control factor is long-term. We will strategize the capability of synergies to aggregate.