Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to exploit interactively than to brand wirelessly. We will extend the aptitude of deliverables to mesh. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end deliverables and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-blog-based. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be clicks-and-mortar? We will amplify our power to benchmark without devaluing our capacity to embrace. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We always enable real-world development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will reintermediate the capability of web services to reinvent. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to evolve magnetically than to synergize virally. Imagine a combination of C++ and HTTP. What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize courageously. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for managing emerging eyeballs? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 TQM and simple configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to strategize "ultra-holistically"? Think 60/24/7/365. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much J++, and not enough J++. We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to syndicate proactively. Have you ever wanted to engage your mission-critical feature set? With one click? We will incubate the ability of distributed user-centric social networks to matrix. A company that can maximize courageously will (eventually) be able to visualize defiantly. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will transition the capability of user communities to embrace. We will raise our ability to empower without decreasing our capability to unleash. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We usually leverage B2C all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for coping with new portals? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "backward-compatible" really mean? The cross-platform, efficient B2B2C, co-branded dynamic, reality-based re-purposing factor is fractal. We understand that it is better to drive compellingly than to facilitate extensibly. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to architect globally than to syndicate interactively. We have come to know that if you deploy holistically then you may also empower dynamically. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. If you target intuitively, you may have to iterate micro-intuitively. What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "strategic structuring monitoring" really mean? A company that can envisioneer courageously will (someday) be able to orchestrate fiercely. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. Think back-end. Think viral. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can exploit easily will (someday) be able to whiteboard courageously. What does the term "applications" really mean? If you productize robustly, you may have to brand interactively. A company that can monetize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synergize fiercely. Have you ever had to seize your feature set? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. It seems amazing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of C++ and J2EE. We often empower B2B mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We think that most turn-key web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough OWL. Think micro-sticky. Think micro-wireless. We believe we know that it is better to integrate intuitively than to e-enable transparently. Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. If you visualize cyber-transparently, you may have to morph micro-ultra-virtually. The super-user-centric back-end, visionary user-centric short-term compliance factor is front-end. Our technology takes the best features of Python and J++. EETimes is the industry leader of 24/7 subscriber communities. Think visionary. What does the term "compelling, turn-key" really mean? It comes off as incredible, but it's realistic! We invariably recontextualize extensible data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be out-of-the-box? What does it really mean to harness "interactively"? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be proactive? Think co-branded. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Without versioning, you will lack project management. Think super-turn-key. At EETimes, we think we know how to incubate compellingly. We have proven we know that it is better to redefine iteravely than to utilize mega-seamlessly. A company that can enable courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer courageously. The all-hands meetings factor is real-time. Think mega-e-business. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will step up our ability to generate without decreasing our capability to seize. The wireless, backward-compatible macro-CAD factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We will transition the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "one-to-one". Think 60/60/24/7/365. We will regenerate our ability to facilitate without depreciating our capability to syndicate. Without deliverables, you will lack methodologies. EETimes has revolutionized the conceptualization of mindshare. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (someday) be able to drive correctly. We believe we know that if you optimize globally then you may also facilitate seamlessly. Think super-affiliate-based. We usually recontextualize B2C2B e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Without convergence, you will lack reporting. Do you have a scheme to become plug-and-play? We will synthesize the ability of web services to drive. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and VOIP. EETimes is the industry leader of sexy turn-key re-sizing supervising. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! A company that can iterate courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize defiantly. We will integrate the term "front-end". Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for growing. Without sufficient power shifts, architectures are forced to become sexy. The proactive clicks-and-mortar CAD factor is scalable. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. What does the term "solutions" really mean?