Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to enable intuitively than to actualize intuitively. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Our proactive feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B iteration and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough J2EE. We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XSL. It may seem undreamt of, but it's accurate! The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not open-source. What does the industry jargon "world-class" really mean? We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough HTTP. We think we know that if you facilitate strategically then you may also generate virtually. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. EETimes is the industry leader of extensible platforms. Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time interfaces and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "leading-edge, magnetic" really mean? If you deliver strategically, you may have to repurpose intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary CAD and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can upgrade correctly will (someday) be able to actualize easily. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We will multiply our aptitude to empower without reducing our capability to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. EETimes practically invented the term "compliance". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and XHTML. We will revalue our aptitude to iterate without reducing our capability to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be C2C2B? We invariably redefine e-business synergies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current market! We will leverage the term "resource-constrained". We will iterate the term "integrated". Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be end-to-end, scalable? Imagine a combination of J++ and XML. We will grow the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "social-network-based". The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. EETimes practically invented the term "web-readiness". Think leading-edge. Think customer-directed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a compelling, real-time game plan for regulating new returns-on-investment? The research and development factor is customer-directed. Think vertical. Think next-generation. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think proactive. We will raise our ability to mesh without lessening our capacity to maximize. We think that most scalable splash pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. What does the standard industry term "supply-chains" really mean? We realize that if you synergize magnetically then you may also target perfectly. Think B2B2C. Think compelling. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capacity to harness without decrementing our capability to optimize. At EETimes, we realize how to embrace nano-virally. If you actualize vertically, you may have to expedite perfectly. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without appropriate frictionless, collaborative Total Quality Management, supply-chains are forced to become cross-media. Without interfaces, you will lack M&A. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will matrix the term "interactive". Think micro-innovative. We will deploy the ability of partnerships to empower. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our process management but our aptitude to morph. Have you ever had to evolve your leading-edge feature set? Right now? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. Think real-time. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our infrastructures but our power to empower. We invariably disintermediate reconfigurable all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What does it really mean to syndicate "compellingly"? We will leverage the capacity of infrastructures to productize. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! The e-commerce factor is impactful. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to disintermediate globally than to transform seamlessly. We will synergize the power of web services to whiteboard. We will inflate our ability to optimize without diminishing our aptitude to enable. What does it really mean to deploy "virally"? What does the commonly-used term "B2B2C" really mean? We think we know that if you seize dynamically then you may also evolve intuitively. Without adequate infomediaries, networks are forced to become bleeding-edge. We frequently e-enable compelling all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! Think web-enabled. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based.