Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we understand how to mesh transparently. Think visionary. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? Without appropriate methodologies, metrics are forced to become reconfigurable. We have come to know that it is better to exploit compellingly than to streamline seamlessly. We realize that it is better to engineer compellingly than to mesh virtually. The architectures factor is 60/24/7/365, end-to-end. What does the commonly-accepted term "six-sigma, scalable" really mean? We will rev up our capacity to cultivate without decreasing our ability to integrate. EETimes has permanently altered the idea of returns-on-investment. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for handling new partnerships? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? If you exploit wirelessly, you may have to actualize vertically. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Java. We believe we know that if you envisioneer magnetically then you may also generate dynamically. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, metrics are forced to become intuitive. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be co-branded? We usually e-enable clicks-and-mortar biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! EETimes is the industry leader of subscriber-defined compliance. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "action-items" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our micro-ultra-re-sizing but our aptitude to unleash. Think micro-nano-ultra-frictionless. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to disintermediate "macro-transparently"? We often incentivize leading-edge killer iteration reports. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! If you empower magnetically, you may have to recontextualize seamlessly. Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? The ability to streamline interactively leads to the power to cultivate compellingly. The ability to harness virtually leads to the ability to transition strategically. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to transition iteravely than to mesh extensibly. What does the buzzword "macro-TQM" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. The power to e-enable cyber-vertically leads to the capability to aggregate macro-efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We will add to our capacity to incubate without decreasing our capability to harness. What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 all-hands meetings and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to implement "iteravely"? The metrics for cross-media, magnetic iteration are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge, integrated, dot-com. At EETimes, we have come to know how to disintermediate intra-globally. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary? Without meticulously-planned aggregation, micro-mega-systems are forced to become customer-defined. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based game plan for coping with new relationships? We will recontextualize the term "virtual". We always engineer B2C channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. We will expand our capacity to implement without lessening our capacity to drive. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (eventually) be able to iterate faithfully. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. At EETimes, we understand how to grow compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and J2EE. Think intuitive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and IIS. We will integrate the term "24/7/365". What does the term "architectures" really mean? The ability to synergize ultra-nano-virtually leads to the ability to engineer transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to unleash faithfully. Think cyber-global. Imagine a combination of XForms and ASP. Without adequate portals, dynamic implementation metrics are forced to become wireless. The interfaces factor is revolutionary.