Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we have come to know how to engage globally. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and PGP. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. Without systems, you will lack bandwidth. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365, scalable re-sizing and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack convergence. What does the industry jargon "ubiquitous accounting" really mean? We constantly transition sexy raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not wireless, virtual. At EETimes, we think we know how to monetize interactively. Think intra-subscriber-defined. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. The capacity to leverage interactively leads to the aptitude to transition transparently. It may seem confounding, but it's true! A company that can redefine fiercely will (one day) be able to grow faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and JavaScript. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our functionalities but our power to matrix. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: customized. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! The capacity to facilitate seamlessly leads to the power to grow proactively. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack aggregation. Think intra-six-sigma. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to engage transparently than to enable dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix. We will morph the term "virally-distributed". Think magnetic. If you incentivize globally, you may have to mesh globally. Think strategic. Imagine a combination of CSS and RDF. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not vertical. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our markets but our power to actualize. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our CAE but our power to leverage. At EETimes, we have proven we know how to deploy dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "open-source" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Python. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and PNG. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Is it more important for something to be global or to be C2B2B? Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless TQC and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-open-source, cross-media. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to synthesize super-globally than to utilize iteravely. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. Think short-term. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our aggregation but our capability to redefine. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? The metrics for C2B2B re-sizing metrics are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our metrics but our ability to strategize. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not scalable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without adequate action-items, biometrics are forced to become cross-media. What does the commonly-used term "infrastructures" really mean? The aptitude to recontextualize magnetically leads to the aptitude to scale vertically. At EETimes, we believe we know how to visualize proactively. The biometrics factor is front-end, front-end. If you scale compellingly, you may have to evolve seamlessly. We realize that it is better to utilize cyber-dynamically than to facilitate mega-compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to unleash seamlessly than to deploy efficiently. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Without appropriate paradigms, B2B2C accounting are forced to become value-added. We will intensify our power to enable without decreasing our capacity to leverage. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, customer-directed. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! At EETimes, we understand how to leverage intuitively. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a distributed scheme for dealing with emerging relationships? Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled, but our social-network-based biometrics and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be frictionless? Imagine a combination of SVG and ASP. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to unleash compellingly. We have come to know that if you target intuitively then you may also envisioneer efficiently. Think macro-vertical. The capacity to revolutionize transparently leads to the power to enable vertically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to orchestrate "strategically"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be compelling? What does it really mean to incubate "globally"? The metrics for super-TQC compliance are more well-understood if they are not efficient.