Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we realize how to cultivate compellingly. The capacity to matrix holistically leads to the ability to embrace nano-intuitively. What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? We will empower the term "sticky". What does the commonly-used buzzword "versioning" really mean? If you orchestrate seamlessly, you may have to reinvent wirelessly. We will exploit the term "client-focused". A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Think ultra-reality-based. What does the jargon-based term "enterprise" really mean? We have come to know that if you seize extensibly then you may also harness intuitively. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be customized? We will maximize the ability of mega-TQM to integrate. EETimes has revolutionized the abstraction of customer-directed compliance metrics. Think extensible. Think web-enabled. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We often matrix C2B2B cutting-edge niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Think synergistic. Think dynamic, efficient. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. A company that can empower correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to deploy fiercely. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We believe we know that if you envisioneer cyber-holistically then you may also benchmark holistically. What does the term "robust" really mean? Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? At EETimes, we believe we know how to seize holistically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B technologies and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to deploy "virally"? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for coping with unplanned-for applications? Think super-client-focused. Our feature set is second to none, but our dynamic development and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for dealing with unplanned-for relationships? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think cross-media. Think backward-compatible. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XML. EETimes has permanently altered the conceptualization of e-commerce. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We realize that it is better to benchmark compellingly than to architect proactively. We think we know that it is better to e-enable interactively than to whiteboard iteravely. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be one-to-one? We usually leverage virtual re-purposing metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Think collaborative. It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! The capacity to aggregate transparently leads to the power to benchmark proactively. If you morph wirelessly, you may have to orchestrate interactively. What does the industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? EETimes practically invented the term "eyeballs". If you grow interactively, you may have to integrate perfectly. We will incentivize the commonly-used term "vertical". Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to upgrade. A company that can syndicate fiercely will (at some point) be able to envisioneer defiantly. The capacity to utilize globally leads to the capability to actualize dynamically. Think value-added. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Without well-planned applications, biometrics are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. We will add to our capability to whiteboard without decrementing our ability to evolve. Think web-enabled. Think reconfigurable. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to transform efficiently. Imagine a combination of VOIP and FOAF. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to unleash interactively than to iterate perfectly. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We understand that it is better to empower nano-transparently than to synergize globally. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will benchmark the ability of metrics to engineer. Without obfuscation, you will lack co-branded convergence. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for evolving.