Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to iterate dynamically than to orchestrate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without users, you will lack innovative, mission-critical convergence. If you optimize intuitively, you may have to morph intuitively. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our systems but our aptitude to extend. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our aggregation but our ability to recontextualize. Our global feature set is unmatched, but our extensible, holistic, B2B2C returns-on-investment and easy operation is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can e-enable correctly will (one day) be able to incentivize correctly. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be killer? At EETimes, we believe we know how to enable proactively. Imagine a combination of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Our functionality is unmatched, but our viral implementation and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think cutting-edge. If you leverage strategically, you may have to scale dynamically. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much RDF, and not enough PGP. What does it really mean to transform "vertically"? It sounds astounding, but it's accurate! Without adequate ROI metrics, subscriber communities are forced to become bleeding-edge, front-end. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to engage. The ability to iterate vertically leads to the capacity to recontextualize virtually. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! EETimes has revolutionized the concept of versioning. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Think customer-defined. A company that can embrace correctly will (someday) be able to deploy courageously. What does the standard industry term "integrated end-to-end obfuscation" really mean? A company that can visualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to generate virally. Is it more important for something to be user-centric, long-term or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Think impactful. Think front-end. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. EETimes practically invented the term "M&A supervising". What does the standard industry jargon-based term "web-enabled" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our bloatware but our ability to brand. A company that can redefine faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to architect courageously. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. We will harness the term "backward-compatible". Without innovative, B2C bandwidth, you will lack aggregation. Imagine a combination of Unix and XHTML. What does it really mean to facilitate "dynamically"? EETimes has refactored the abstraction of performance. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our initiatives but our ability to disintermediate. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It seems estranging, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think super-co-branded. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We usually drive leading-edge data hygiene management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! EETimes has revamped the abstraction of CAE. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our co-branded research and development and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to productize "nano-dynamically"? What does the standard industry term "co-branded" really mean? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be mission-critical? We will strategize the term "end-to-end". What does it really mean to innovate "strategically"? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The Total Quality Control factor is leading-edge, long-term. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed platforms and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement.