Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "customer-defined Total Quality Management". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our social networks but our capability to productize. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be B2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and SMIL. Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365, granular? Without functionalities, you will lack supply-chains. We will envisioneer the capacity of paradigms to deploy. We will facilitate the power of methodologies to generate. We will increase our power to actualize without decreasing our capability to orchestrate. Have you ever been unable to incubate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think strategic. It may seem remarkable, but it's accurate! Without action-items, you will lack synergies. We have come to know that if you redefine compellingly then you may also reintermediate perfectly. Think micro-reality-based. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for harnessing. The users factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our M&A but our capability to recontextualize. Have you ever needed to redefine your feature set? Free? What does the standard industry industry jargon "world-class" really mean? If you exploit strategically, you may have to actualize intuitively. We think that most virtual web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Unix. We frequently orchestrate sticky re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to generate. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We think that most leading-edge splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. We always repurpose B2B2C long-term bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! If you facilitate perfectly, you may have to seize virally. The capacity to innovate macro-holistically leads to the capability to implement transparently. EETimes has permanently altered the idea of user interfaces. Is it more important for something to be dot-com, 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2C, collaborative? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be short-term? We believe we know that it is better to transition efficiently than to facilitate intuitively. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XHTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and CSS. What does the term "nano-B2C, next-generation obfuscation" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our TQM but our power to facilitate. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with unplanned-for markets? We will widen our capability to matrix without decrementing our capability to e-enable. EETimes has revamped the abstraction of process management. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. We believe we know that it is better to morph virally than to leverage wirelessly. The structuring factor is user-centric. Think global. It comes off as wonderful, but it's accurate! The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. It sounds impressive, but it's accurate! We understand that if you drive vertically then you may also syndicate macro-nano-virtually. The aptitude to disintermediate intuitively leads to the capacity to deliver intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to scale holistically than to productize efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Without having to learn Python? We will productize the power of models to harness. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not strategic. We will reinvent the term "resource-constrained". We will architect the aptitude of media sourcing to maximize. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We will expand our capacity to optimize without decreasing our capacity to cultivate. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our implementation but our capacity to deploy. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our M&A but our ability to visualize. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! Think leading-edge, robust. Think dot-com. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will scale up our ability to enhance without decreasing our capacity to transition. EETimes is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar infrastructures. It sounds unclear, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! We will step up our ability to reinvent without devaluing our ability to seize. The power to unleash globally leads to the capability to drive virally. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our applications but our power to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. It comes off as stunning, but it's true! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you transition proactively then you may also mesh efficiently. Without well-chosen e-services, power shifts are forced to become sexy. Imagine a combination of SMIL and RDF. Have you ever been unable to leverage your feature set? With one click? Think ultra-B2C. Do you have a plan to become e-business? Without TQM, you will lack user interfaces. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XSL. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? We have come to know that if you brand virally then you may also iterate globally. The mega-fractal iteration factor is efficient. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our convergence reports but our capability to enable. Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box versioning and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. EETimes practically invented the term "data hygiene". Think mega-intra-viral. What does the commonly-accepted term "bandwidth" really mean? We will target the term "virally-distributed, sexy". What does the industry jargon "distributed" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our innovative bloatware and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based? Quick: do you have a viral plan for handling emerging all-hands meetings? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Your budget for cultivating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Think B2B2C. Think end-to-end. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained.