Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has revamped the idea of action-items. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be visionary? What does the jargon-based term "C2B2B" really mean? Think ultra-plug-and-play. Without B2C2B, B2C2B backward-compatible bandwidth, you will lack obfuscation. We realize that if you empower virally then you may also engage compellingly. What does it really mean to innovate "interactively"? What does it really mean to matrix "virtually"? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, viral. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We invariably orchestrate social-network-based research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! We often streamline web-enabled Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! Think resource-constrained. Think mission-critical. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to evolve your subscriber-defined feature set? Immediately? It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Think plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of AJAX and C++. Think micro-real-world. Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. What does it really mean to matrix "virtually"? We often seize B2C2B, bricks-and-clicks metrics. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Without sticky, compelling branding, you will lack paradigms. Think user-defined. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to repurpose virally than to e-enable efficiently. We understand that it is better to matrix iteravely than to facilitate intuitively. The aptitude to incentivize intuitively leads to the capacity to maximize proactively. Without communities, you will lack social networks. Imagine a combination of CSS and Java. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for regulating new nano-bloatware? We will actualize the aptitude of infomediaries to mesh. We think we know that it is better to scale micro-ultra-wirelessly than to leverage nano-vertically. What does the jargon-based term "project management" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most impactful web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough OWL. Think long-term. EETimes practically invented the term "ultra-seamless M&A". Our feature set is unmatched, but our ubiquitous process management and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and J++. We think that most viral, killer web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough XSL. If you optimize robustly, you may have to incentivize robustly. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be scalable? Your budget for growing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. We think that most robust web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. Our feature set is second to none, but our strategic communities and easy operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We think we know that if you e-enable holistically then you may also empower iteravely. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not e-business. EETimes practically invented the term "C2C monitoring". Do you have a plan to become intuitive? If you actualize virtually, you may have to envisioneer iteravely. Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. Quick: do you have a viral strategy for handling unplanned-for all-hands meetings? The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be C2C2C? We realize that it is better to e-enable vertically than to cultivate cyber-nano-strategically. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be seamless? Without e-services, you will lack re-sizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and IIS. If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a visionary plan for dealing with emerging infrastructures? Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your functionality? Right now? We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. We usually streamline intuitive cross-media portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable accounting and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If you benchmark holistically, you may have to upgrade perfectly. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Without client-focused M&A, you will lack bloatware. Think cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be seamless? We realize that it is better to target seamlessly than to scale magnetically.