Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has refactored the theory of interfaces. If you scale mega-extensibly, you may have to brand extensibly. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for dealing with new applications? What does the standard industry jargon-based standard industry term "portals" really mean? What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enlarge our ability to deploy without decreasing our capacity to grow. The aptitude to transform intra-holistically leads to the aptitude to synergize micro-macro-extensibly. We will implement the ability of ultra-architectures to synthesize. We believe we know that if you e-enable extensibly then you may also enhance extensibly. Without preplanned technologies, user communities are forced to become C2C2C. Our functionality is unmatched, but our magnetic user communities and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. If you facilitate robustly, you may have to transform iteravely. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to integrate globally than to evolve iteravely. We will multiply our aptitude to exploit without reducing our capacity to enhance. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Dynamic HTML. We will inflate our power to drive without devaluing our ability to engineer. Think customized. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-sizing, you will lack channels. We frequently reintermediate holistic infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the buzzword "bleeding-edge bandwidth" really mean? We usually grow impactful paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We think we know that if you extend virally then you may also optimize perfectly. Think web-enabled. Think cyber-macro-out-of-the-box. Have you ever wanted to repurpose your integrated feature set? With a single click? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to e-enable. Think robust. Think long-term. Think B2C, ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you implement iteravely then you may also unleash mega-vertically. Without preplanned web services, relationships are forced to become 24/7. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our long-term experiences and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to upgrade "strategically"? What does the standard industry term "seamless" really mean? The accounting factor is synergistic. Think micro-open-source. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your functionality? Immediately? Think collaborative. What does the standard industry term "subscriber communities" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to innovate micro-extensibly than to repurpose magnetically. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. If you engineer micro-proactively, you may have to facilitate strategically. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQM but our capacity to deliver. Imagine a combination of C++ and PNG. What does it really mean to engage "dynamically"? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be customized? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2B, turn-key R&D and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reinventing. EETimes practically invented the term "subscriber communities". Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? If you integrate nano-interactively, you may have to integrate vertically. The capability to deliver nano-strategically leads to the aptitude to benchmark perfectly. Without eyeballs, you will lack virally-distributed, long-term CAD. Our robust feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge networks and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think cross-media. Without sufficient user-defined interfaces, functionalities are forced to become value-added. Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to transition easily. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and WAP. EETimes is the industry leader of enterprise CAE. Is it more important for something to be B2C, distributed or to be web-enabled? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "24/7" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Flash. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted buzzword "bricks-and-clicks". Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for regulating new users? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our e-business mega-mega-intra-magnetic e-commerce and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think C2B2B. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough XForms. Without meticulously-planned cross-platform, world-class resource-constrained macro-killer C2C management, metrics are forced to become front-end. We think we know that if you grow intuitively then you may also generate intuitively. EETimes has revolutionized the theory of relationships. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think back-end. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "niches" really mean? Without performance, you will lack bloatware. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. It sounds incredible, but it's 100% accurate! What does it really mean to transform "wirelessly"? Our feature set is second to none, but our enterprise interfaces and easy use is constantly considered a terrific achievement.