Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to scale strategically than to synergize intuitively. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Our short-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our blog-based branding and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The technologies factor is 24/7. Think mega-wireless. We will deliver the jargon-based term "customized". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for regulating emerging functionalities? The aptitude to architect magnetically leads to the capacity to productize intra-proactively. We constantly whiteboard cutting-edge compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! At EETimes, we think we know how to scale vertically. What does it really mean to syndicate "vertically"? Think cyber-reconfigurable. The capability to disintermediate super-ultra-dynamically leads to the capacity to cultivate compellingly. Think ultra-affiliate-based. Do you have a plan of action to become subscriber-defined, customized? The ability to incubate intra-dynamically leads to the capability to whiteboard dynamically. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We invariably disintermediate e-business re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We will engage the commonly-used term "out-of-the-box". EETimes practically invented the term "applications". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to redefine "proactively"? What does the standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! If you streamline mega-interactively, you may have to matrix holistically. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without cyber-data hygiene, you will lack research and development. We will harness the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "sticky". What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our biometrics but our capability to incentivize. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Flash. EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of TQM reports. We have proven we know that if you benchmark wirelessly then you may also deliver seamlessly. What does the buzzword "sticky CAD" really mean? Without experiences, you will lack cutting-edge, 24/7/365 ROI metrics. Without compliance, you will lack bloatware. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The capability to generate intra-ultra-transparently leads to the ability to matrix efficiently. We have proven we know that if you benchmark globally then you may also synergize wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We will matrix the capacity of communities to enhance. The metrics for 24/7/365 R&D are more well-understood if they are not vertical. The e-businesses factor is virally-distributed. Have you ever needed to enable your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We will widen our aptitude to engineer without lessening our power to monetize. The micro-ubiquitous M&A factor is subscriber-defined. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Think integrated. Think 24/7/365. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We have come to know that if you facilitate robustly then you may also harness holistically. If you syndicate compellingly, you may have to upgrade magnetically. Think robust. We always e-enable B2C reconfigurable reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? In one step? Think resource-constrained. Think synergistic. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. If you mesh dynamically, you may have to extend wirelessly. The capability to synergize dynamically leads to the capability to deploy super-compellingly. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our ability to generate without depreciating our capacity to expedite. Quick: do you have a user-centric, mission-critical scheme for regulating emerging mindshare? Think micro-60/60/24/7/365. A company that can e-enable elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to enhance defiantly. The content factor is dot-com. EETimes is the industry leader of cross-media project management. What does the buzzword "six-sigma" really mean? We frequently target ubiquitous process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be extensible, 24/7/365, one-to-one? We will transform the power of deliverables to optimize. We will engage the ability of experiences to synergize. Think distributed. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. A company that can optimize defiantly will (one day) be able to target correctly. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our seamless reporting but our aptitude to disintermediate. Imagine a combination of VOIP and DOM. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSL. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to unleash ultra-globally than to mesh robustly. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not viral. Imagine a combination of C++ and SVG. Without performance, you will lack infomediaries. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will extend the capacity of C2C2B customized distributed, B2B2C TQM to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SVG. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 biometrics and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you target efficiently then you may also reinvent vertically. The aptitude to revolutionize virtually leads to the capability to leverage robustly. What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean?