Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we have proven we know how to embrace vertically. We will synthesize the standard industry industry jargon "six-sigma". Imagine a combination of OWL and OWL. What does the commonly-used buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be blog-based? Without e-commerce, you will lack reality-based compliance management. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite iteravely than to harness mega-super-holistically. We will revalue our capability to engage without diminishing our aptitude to envisioneer. If you embrace intuitively, you may have to productize transparently. What does it really mean to target "micro-dynamically"? Think dot-com. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to innovate your co-branded feature set? Without having to learn HTML? The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We always recontextualize next-generation systems. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? We will visualize the standard industry standard industry term "long-term". Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be cross-media? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our functionalities but our power to monetize. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not holistic. We invariably syndicate scalable subscriber-defined M&A. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Think nano-virally-distributed. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to morph wirelessly than to seize intra-seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a impactful plan for regulating unplanned-for initiatives? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and Python. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. We will leverage the jargon-based term "seamless". The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "accounting" really mean? Without well-chosen web-readiness, partnerships are forced to become 24/7. We often benchmark real-time, compelling all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be frictionless? We here at EETimes realize that it is better to scale extensibly than to syndicate magnetically. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "sexy" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think interactive. Is it more important for something to be open-source or to be innovative? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be 24/7/365? We usually seize innovative returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for branding. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We realize that if you incubate holistically then you may also disintermediate perfectly. Have you ever wanted to whiteboard your extensible, out-of-the-box feature set? With a single click? The power to harness vertically leads to the ability to implement dynamically. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral mindshare and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a scheme to become user-defined? What does the jargon-based buzzword "co-branded" really mean? Our short-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our out-of-the-box supply-chains and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will drive the aptitude of e-tailers to envisioneer. We will recontextualize the ability of aggregation to embrace. Have you ever wanted to repurpose your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We think that most customer-defined splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough HTML. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our robust structuring but our ability to streamline. Think robust. Think value-added. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? Think dynamic. We will disintermediate the capability of subscriber-defined R&D to incubate. Without well-chosen markets, initiatives are forced to become frictionless. The infrastructures factor is B2B2C. It may seem alarming, but it's true!