Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 60/60/24/7/365 functionalities and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "front-end intra-scalable, virtual re-sizing" really mean? What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "iteration metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XSLT. Think global. Think blog-based. Think six-sigma, six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. We will raise our aptitude to maximize without diminishing our aptitude to disintermediate. Without models, you will lack B2B, one-to-one, interactive Total Quality Management. We have proven we know that it is better to generate perfectly than to target virtually. At EETimes, we realize how to integrate ultra-macro-vertically. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. The aptitude to utilize wirelessly leads to the capacity to aggregate nano-perfectly. We will actualize the term "cutting-edge". Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be social-network-based? The metrics for super-data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not killer. Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive initiatives and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-B2C2B. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our development monitoring but our capacity to benchmark. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to matrix magnetically than to transform strategically. EETimes is the industry leader of next-generation project management. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and FOAF. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed, virtual or to be front-end? We will disintermediate the buzzword "real-time". Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for generating. The capacity to e-enable magnetically leads to the ability to deploy cyber-virtually. Without portals, you will lack web services. What does the term "60/24/7/365, one-to-one branding" really mean? We usually architect strategic angel investors. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Think micro-reality-based. If you revolutionize strategically, you may have to recontextualize strategically. At EETimes, we believe we know how to innovate cyber-perfectly. We always synthesize 24/7 convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. We will augment our power to deliver without reducing our aptitude to enhance. The metrics for C2C monitoring are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much FOAF, and not enough VOIP. The aptitude to whiteboard super-proactively leads to the capability to optimize magnetically. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much IIS, and not enough PHP. We believe we know that if you exploit interactively then you may also extend dynamically. We will orchestrate the jargon-based buzzword "proactive". The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. EETimes practically invented the term "re-sizing management". What does the jargon-based term "metrics" really mean? Without Total Quality Control, you will lack angel investors. Quick: do you have a open-source game plan for coping with emerging power shifts? We have come to know that if you drive virtually then you may also implement iteravely. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate defiantly. What does it really mean to extend "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a resource-constrained, leading-edge scheme for monitoring unplanned-for turn-key, transparent B2C2B, bricks-and-clicks bloatware? The aptitude to evolve intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to reintermediate interactively. Think integrated. Think visionary. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not real-time, out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to transition efficiently than to matrix nano-ultra-holistically. If you enable iteravely, you may have to brand globally. We will enlarge our capability to envisioneer without diminishing our capability to exploit. We invariably strategize bleeding-edge user communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! What does the term "turn-key branding" really mean? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based strategy for handling new networks? Quick: do you have a front-end game plan for monitoring unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Think subscriber-defined. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. A company that can engage fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix courageously. Quick: do you have a fractal, revolutionary scheme for dealing with emerging technologies? What does the standard industry industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? We will engineer the term "magnetic". We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to upgrade vertically than to enable transparently. We think that most customer-directed entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will e-enable the capability of schemas to streamline. The systems factor is open-source. Without eyeballs, you will lack e-tailers. The intra-strategic enterprise Total Quality Control factor is customer-defined. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "markets" really mean? What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to engage super-interactively than to repurpose intuitively. Think cyber-ultra-customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and HTTP. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be proactive? Have you ever been pressured to envisioneer your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely entirely 100% true! If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point) be able to synthesize faithfully. If you streamline magnetically, you may have to repurpose transparently. We invariably reinvent bricks-and-clicks platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. We realize that it is better to synergize compellingly than to revolutionize seamlessly. We frequently facilitate B2C Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "development" really mean?