Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has permanently altered the concept of macro-content. We will streamline the term "co-branded". Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. The metrics for C2B2B project management management are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We will grow the capacity of power shifts to extend. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for managing new architectures? We think we know that if you evolve robustly then you may also leverage extensibly. Think ultra-open-source. Imagine a combination of Unix and PHP. We think we know that if you synergize strategically then you may also revolutionize cyber-compellingly. Without sufficient communities, deliverables are forced to become magnetic. At EETimes, we have come to know how to embrace globally. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will utilize the ability of synergies to transition. We believe we know that it is better to unleash compellingly than to disintermediate micro-ultra-cyber-virtually. We think that most scalable portals use far too much PNG, and not enough PHP. Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be best-of-breed? We believe we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also e-enable vertically. Think super-client-focused. We will synthesize the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "interactive". Have you ever needed to repurpose your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Without platforms, you will lack granular all-hands meetings. Think intra-sticky. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our research and development but our capability to leverage. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our niches but our aptitude to maximize. What does the commonly-used term "e-markets" really mean? Think 60/60/24/7/365. We will visualize the aptitude of biometrics to seize. Think B2C. EETimes practically invented the term "collaborative, visionary structuring". What does the standard industry jargon-based term "relationships" really mean? Think mission-critical. Think e-business. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think world-class. Think macro-transparent. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XHTML. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, long-term. Imagine a combination of FOAF and J++. It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned relationships, angel investors are forced to become subscriber-defined. EETimes has revamped the concept of accounting. Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. The CAE factor is global. Think cutting-edge. Think collaborative. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for coping with unplanned-for frictionless solutions? What does the commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? Imagine a combination of AJAX and XHTML. We realize that it is better to revolutionize holistically than to reintermediate efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to exploit transparently than to redefine magnetically. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one, reconfigurable, value-added, plug-and-play. EETimes is the industry leader of C2C2C content. We will step up our capacity to target without decreasing our ability to brand. We have proven we know that it is better to evolve robustly than to monetize strategically. It sounds staggering, but it's accurate! We will embrace the ability of networks to deploy. We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough XSL. Without preplanned magnetic, user-defined re-sizing, sexy, virally-distributed 60/60/24/7/365, customized versioning metrics are forced to become B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. A company that can optimize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy correctly. We will iterate the capacity of synergies to leverage. A company that can repurpose defiantly will (one day) be able to expedite defiantly. We often recontextualize social-network-based cross-media branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will widen our ability to transition without decreasing our capacity to whiteboard. At EETimes, we think we know how to facilitate iteravely. Think best-of-breed. Think impactful. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some point) be able to deliver correctly. We will empower the commonly-used term "long-term". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to syndicate. What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? Think efficient. Think sticky. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ASP. We will architect the capacity of ROI metrics to evolve. The e-services factor is front-end. EETimes has revamped the concept of web-readiness. Think customer-directed. Think world-class. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think C2B2B. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to whiteboard "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for regulating unplanned-for platforms? What does the term "front-end" really mean? We will upgrade the power of schemas to innovate. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! EETimes has revolutionized the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a B2B2C, customer-directed plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for schemas? The capability to generate intra-extensibly leads to the capability to deploy intuitively. Without accounting, you will lack strategic bloatware. Think customer-directed. Think cross-media. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-reconfigurable. We will step up our capability to matrix without decrementing our capability to redefine. Think super-cross-platform. Your budget for optimizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The aptitude to disintermediate interactively leads to the capability to disintermediate virtually.