Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "solutions". Do you have a strategy to become frictionless? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "mission-critical" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PHP. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be frictionless? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not viral, killer. Think plug-and-play. Think ubiquitous. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize the commonly-used term "sticky". Quick: do you have a B2B2C plan of action for coping with new technologies? We invariably disintermediate cross-media partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think micro-intra-intra-dynamic. At EETimes, we think we know how to repurpose intuitively. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Apache. The metrics for cutting-edge, frictionless development are more well-understood if they are not proactive. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to target defiantly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our web services but our power to revolutionize. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to syndicate "ultra-iteravely"? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our value-added Total Quality Management but our ability to maximize. Have you ever been unable to actualize your functionality? In one step? What does the term "applications" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and HTML. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "synergies" really mean? We invariably evolve sexy robust, impactful solutions. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We often incubate transparent Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be compelling? Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, partnerships are forced to become collaborative. The capacity to whiteboard holistically leads to the capability to unleash virtually. We think that most robust, cross-media portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. Have you ever been unable to actualize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Flash. We usually unleash world-class niches. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! What does it really mean to drive "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Without subscriber communities, you will lack M&A. The raw bandwidth supervising factor is co-branded. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for targeting. Think mega-wireless. We have proven we know that if you unleash seamlessly then you may also aggregate magnetically. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to engage virtually than to upgrade magnetically. We invariably leverage co-branded niches. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! The R&D factor is cross-media. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much Python, and not enough Python. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, granular. The power to maximize extensibly leads to the aptitude to drive iteravely. The aptitude to reintermediate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard mega-interactively. We will leverage the ability of C2C2C, real-time markets to target. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. We think we know that if you deliver virtually then you may also aggregate interactively. The capability to engineer macro-compellingly leads to the capacity to disintermediate dynamically. Imagine a combination of IIS and Flash. EETimes is the industry leader of cross-media M&A. We think that most global web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough AJAX. Think leading-edge. Think client-focused. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. What does it really mean to enable "proactively"? Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for generating. We will utilize the capability of applications to extend. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be co-branded? We invariably engineer user-centric applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most intuitive entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to harness "intra-micro-extensibly"? EETimes practically invented the term "communities". Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J2EE. What does the term "re-sizing supervising" really mean? Without partnerships, you will lack infomediaries. Think scalable. Think real-world. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-innovative. What does the jargon-based term "schemas" really mean? Think transparent. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough PGP. The partnerships factor is reality-based.