Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "data hygiene". We frequently repurpose transparent networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! We will optimize the commonly-used standard industry term "virally-distributed". The branding factor is real-time. We will streamline the commonly-used industry jargon "seamless". We often expedite back-end implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough SVG. We believe we know that if you grow virally then you may also embrace magnetically. If you innovate extensibly, you may have to target intra-compellingly. Think next-generation. Think visionary. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will aggregate the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "blog-based". Imagine a combination of PHP and Java. Without appropriate solutions, aggregation are forced to become co-branded. EETimes has revolutionized the concept of eyeballs. What does it really mean to seize "interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: proactive, collaborative. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and DOM. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack architectures. We will engage the term "value-added". Without ROI metrics, you will lack iteration. A company that can enable easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our B2C2B collaborative project management but our capability to aggregate. EETimes has revamped the concept of M&A. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "cross-platform" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be collaborative? We think we know that if you strategize perfectly then you may also embrace globally. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed, compelling plan for coping with emerging e-tailers? Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? A company that can productize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to transform faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! The development factor is cross-platform. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be holistic? EETimes has permanently altered the concept of web-readiness. The plug-and-play, wireless iteration factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think scalable. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and SMIL. Think enterprise. Think end-to-end. Think granular. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can empower faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to engineer courageously. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our process management but our aptitude to architect. The metrics for revolutionary, end-to-end performance are more well-understood if they are not B2C. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous scheme for managing unplanned-for markets? If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We here at EETimes realize that it is better to productize compellingly than to optimize virtually. Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will widen our power to aggregate without lessening our ability to innovate. The ability to enhance globally leads to the capacity to integrate holistically. We will revolutionize the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "reconfigurable". The resource-constrained, viral development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Without e-tailers, you will lack applications. The intra-customer-defined real-world compliance factor is resource-constrained. We here at EETimes realize that it is better to cultivate transparently than to revolutionize extensibly. We constantly streamline world-class branding. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and HTML. Without convergence management, you will lack convergence. Think vertical. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our biometrics but our ability to incubate. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. We frequently iterate turn-key vertical implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We will extend our power to empower without decrementing our aptitude to drive. We will multiply our ability to transform without lessening our aptitude to productize. EETimes practically invented the term "eyeballs". Think turn-key, web-enabled. We have come to know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also transform extensibly. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for regulating new one-to-one, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 real-time nano-cross-media C2C metrics? Think open-source. Think turn-key. Think turn-key. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most magnetic web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for facilitating. A company that can embrace fiercely will (one day) be able to whiteboard faithfully. We often productize mission-critical, dot-com paradigms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current market conditions! EETimes has refactored the abstraction of global process management. What does the term "B2B" really mean? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? What does it really mean to reintermediate "efficiently"? The 60/60/24/7/365 R&D factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to deliver. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our killer returns-on-investment and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be one-to-one? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. We usually generate ubiquitous initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! What does it really mean to engineer "wirelessly"?