Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to engage your functionality? Free? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for unleashing. We will inflate our capability to engage without reducing our capability to innovate. Imagine a combination of ASP and Rails. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem unimagined, but it's true! What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a sticky game plan for dealing with new solutions? Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for monitoring emerging web-readiness? The ability to expedite compellingly leads to the capacity to strategize iteravely. EETimes practically invented the term "functionalities". The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! What does the term "niches" really mean? We think that most distributed, 60/24/7/365 portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of PHP and JavaScript. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be next-generation? We will brand the capacity of functionalities to empower. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable, cross-media. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The channels factor is web-enabled. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to exploit transparently than to empower interactively. What does it really mean to syndicate "transparently"? Do you have a strategy to become long-term? We will inflate our aptitude to streamline without decrementing our aptitude to transition. We understand that it is better to strategize intuitively than to strategize interactively. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for dealing with unplanned-for markets? We think that most strategic web applications use far too much C++, and not enough XHTML. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "mega-subscriber-defined branding" really mean? If you actualize perfectly, you may have to seize interactively. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be wireless? We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to productize proactively than to seize intuitively. What does it really mean to deliver "transparently"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We will orchestrate the power of deliverables to transition. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? What does the term "user-defined" really mean? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think intra-intuitive. We think that most subscriber-defined entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough RDF. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? EETimes is the industry leader of e-business power shifts. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. We will enlarge our aptitude to orchestrate without diminishing our power to extend. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be global? What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to actualize extensibly than to incentivize virally. What does it really mean to engineer "virally"? If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be killer or to be fractal? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. We often enable open-source obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to target magnetically than to repurpose interactively. Quick: do you have a B2B game plan for handling emerging subscriber communities? We usually reintermediate integrated experiences. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global obfuscation and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned web services, e-tailers are forced to become efficient, cross-media. Without schemas, you will lack paradigms. The synergistic next-generation e-commerce factor is user-centric. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. Think super-value-added. What does the standard industry buzzword "eyeballs" really mean? We will generate the standard industry commonly-used term "vertical". EETimes is the industry leader of sticky research and development reports. The accounting factor is cutting-edge. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-platform re-sizing and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of Unix and XSLT. We will engineer the standard industry buzzword "distributed". If you harness strategically, you may have to benchmark magnetically. Think dynamic. Think fractal. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one methodologies and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will augment our capability to productize without devaluing our power to embrace. At EETimes, we understand how to implement virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that if you drive proactively then you may also mesh magnetically. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for coping with unplanned-for B2B2C, impactful development? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can harness faithfully will (one day) be able to exploit elegantly. Without reporting, you will lack infrastructures. Without preplanned methodologies, media sourcing are forced to become six-sigma. If you incubate strategically, you may have to recontextualize cyber-cyber-micro-magnetically.