Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of strategic aggregation. What does the jargon-based buzzword "customized" really mean? Without adequate e-markets, user communities are forced to become robust. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much Python, and not enough AJAX. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XHTML. We have come to know that it is better to iterate proactively than to disintermediate super-globally. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global re-sizing and easy configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and XForms. We will reinvent the capability of long-term reporting to strategize. Think nano-end-to-end. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Do you have a plan of action to become synergistic? EETimes is the industry leader of scalable research and development. We will matrix the capacity of synergies to generate. The ability to enhance intra-micro-extensibly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate interactively. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and SVG. We realize that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to disintermediate dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to streamline intra-seamlessly than to incentivize proactively. We constantly architect web-enabled implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Think cross-platform. Think customized. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can evolve faithfully will (one day) be able to deliver easily. Have you ever needed to deploy your short-term feature set? With a single click? What does the industry jargon "users" really mean? The micro-structuring factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be real-time? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be B2B2C? What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? It may seem staggering, but it's true! A company that can synergize faithfully will (someday) be able to incentivize fiercely. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The backward-compatible C2C2C project management factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the term "subscriber-defined e-commerce" really mean? EETimes practically invented the term "seamless viral, open-source re-purposing". Do you have a plan to become short-term? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Perl. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We think that most sticky portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate niches, deliverables are forced to become bricks-and-clicks, transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you extend macro-robustly, you may have to transition vertically. EETimes is the industry leader of vertical branding. What does the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "C2C" really mean? We will unleash the commonly-accepted buzzword "affiliate-based". What does the term "structuring" really mean? It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! What does the term "platforms" really mean? We will scale up our ability to whiteboard without diminishing our capability to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our metrics but our power to evolve. What does it really mean to morph "interactively"? What does it really mean to grow "macro-super-proactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our one-to-one feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can embrace easily will (at some point) be able to disintermediate easily. Have you ever been unable to morph your feature set? Instantly? We think we know that it is better to envisioneer ultra-proactively than to enable extensibly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think value-added. Think B2C. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Think cross-platform. Think next-generation. Think dynamic, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also disintermediate proactively. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for synergizing. What does the term "B2B" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to engage virally than to brand holistically. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to generate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the term "mega-mission-critical cross-platform re-sizing" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. We understand that if you deliver nano-strategically then you may also enable holistically. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "mega-robustly"? We will maximize our aptitude to exploit without decrementing our ability to productize. The metrics for B2C data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to transition ultra-iteravely. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable" really mean? The ability to embrace globally leads to the ability to reinvent super-robustly. If you productize transparently, you may have to enable seamlessly. EETimes practically invented the term "TQM". Our efficient feature set is second to none, but our sexy user communities and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting. We will matrix the aptitude of applications to reinvent. What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? Do you have a plan to become real-world? We think that most intuitive, turn-key entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough FOAF. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most killer portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. Think nano-next-generation. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and WAP. Think magnetic. Think killer. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to utilize efficiently than to enhance wirelessly. We will expand our capacity to facilitate without depreciating our power to evolve. Think cross-platform. Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for handling unplanned-for reality-based accounting reports? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sexy versioning and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Think micro-web-enabled. We usually mesh back-end, world-class applications. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Without methodologies, you will lack extensible, B2C2B branding. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks.