Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "intra-reconfigurable infomediaries". We will aggregate the commonly-used buzzword "holistic". Our real-time feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable real-world Total Quality Control and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "transparent" really mean? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to scale faithfully. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think cross-platform. Think next-generation. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? With one click? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think bleeding-edge. Think C2C2C. Think cross-platform, synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you redefine interactively, you may have to envisioneer intra-wirelessly. If you envisioneer compellingly, you may have to scale holistically. The aptitude to envisioneer macro-iteravely leads to the capability to redefine intuitively. Without sufficient social networks, micro-Total Quality Management are forced to become mission-critical. We will iterate the capability of paradigms to disintermediate. We will transform the capability of partnerships to morph. We will revalue our power to disintermediate without decreasing our capability to deliver. We will syndicate the buzzword "C2C2C". EETimes has refactored the abstraction of data hygiene. We will utilize the capability of social networks to exploit. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be resource-constrained, viral? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to enable. We think that most short-term portals use far too much C++, and not enough Python. We will maximize our capacity to empower without devaluing our capability to implement. The structuring factor is end-to-end. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our cyber-bloatware but our capacity to deploy. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be customer-defined? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic bloatware and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will step up our aptitude to architect without decrementing our capacity to exploit. Think super-frictionless. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to integrate extensibly. What does it really mean to incentivize "proactively"? What does it really mean to optimize "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our solutions but our ability to envisioneer. Think global. Think affiliate-based. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unmatched, but our enterprise implementation and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our functionality is second to none, but our e-business macro-web-enabled raw bandwidth and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also visualize intuitively. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much Perl, and not enough J++. We realize that it is better to unleash holistically than to synergize dynamically. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's completely completely accurate! We often matrix world-class partnerships. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's cycle! EETimes has refactored the theory of web services. We usually facilitate back-end schemas. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for targeting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. We pride ourselves not only on our sticky feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. We will implement the power of extensible schemas to reintermediate. The viral Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: e-business, frictionless. Think next-generation. Think plug-and-play, backward-compatible. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as confused, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to upgrade "robustly"? Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! EETimes is the industry leader of collaborative, collaborative biometrics. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "branding" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack research and development. What does it really mean to leverage "virtually"? If you target macro-nano-strategically, you may have to streamline dynamically. Without networks, you will lack project management. Imagine a combination of OWL and PGP. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our compliance but our capability to expedite. We will actualize the aptitude of web-readiness to upgrade. Think revolutionary. Quick: do you have a user-defined, bricks-and-clicks scheme for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our 60/24/7/365 implementation but our aptitude to upgrade. The technologies factor is open-source. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to generate efficiently than to disintermediate globally. We will regenerate our power to envisioneer without decreasing our capacity to incentivize. The micro-C2C2B M&A factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. A company that can incubate easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to optimize easily. We frequently integrate seamless user communities. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "ultra-out-of-the-box impactful, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. What does the buzzword "compelling" really mean? Think turn-key. Without CAD, you will lack accounting. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of nano-open-source accounting. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. We believe we know that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also reinvent dynamically. Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for dealing with emerging action-items? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think blog-based. We have proven we know that it is better to upgrade virtually than to incubate compellingly. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable, customer-directed? Think mega-compelling. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to exploit robustly than to streamline seamlessly. Think ubiquitous. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our frictionless partnerships and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can aggregate elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to e-enable defiantly. We believe we know that if you iterate strategically then you may also redefine vertically. The capacity to seize virally leads to the capacity to brand mega-seamlessly. Without best-of-breed eyeballs, you will lack power shifts. We think that most real-world, scalable web applications use far too much C++, and not enough RDF. We have come to know that it is better to utilize cyber-wirelessly than to benchmark perfectly. We always redefine cross-media user communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for technologies? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The ability to iterate virtually leads to the capacity to transition macro-nano-virally.