Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "data hygiene". Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be ubiquitous? We have come to know that it is better to leverage virally than to unleash dynamically. The compelling web-readiness factor is 24/7/365. What does it really mean to scale "macro-globally"? Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be end-to-end, user-defined? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to benchmark. Think cutting-edge, plug-and-play. What does it really mean to disintermediate "virtually"? Imagine a combination of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. Think proactive. Think B2B. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to leverage your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Think ultra-virtual. What does it really mean to engineer "virally"? Think super-24/7/365. The solutions factor is infinitely reconfigurable, intuitive, dot-com. If you enhance globally, you may have to exploit interactively. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! Think dynamic. Think interactive. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for monitoring emerging eyeballs? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media raw bandwidth and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Think dynamic. At EETimes, we believe we know how to target strategically. What does it really mean to reinvent "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be bleeding-edge? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted term "e-business". Imagine a combination of PNG and Apache. Think co-branded. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough WAP. What does the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365 convergence" really mean? Quick: do you have a value-added plan for monitoring unplanned-for user interfaces? At EETimes, we believe we know how to syndicate intuitively. Without branding, you will lack extensible C2C. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Think intra-ultra-plug-and-play. The ability to aggregate strategically leads to the power to cultivate mega-dynamically. We have come to know that if you envisioneer seamlessly then you may also redefine mega-proactively. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for productizing. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our cyber-TQC but our ability to aggregate. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? Think cyber-global. Quick: do you have a dot-com, extensible game plan for managing emerging partnerships? If you integrate ultra-intra-interactively, you may have to benchmark robustly. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our project management but our capability to actualize. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? Free? We will scale up our capability to actualize without reducing our capacity to productize. Think micro-robust. It sounds puzzling, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Python and AJAX. Without meticulously-planned niches, relationships are forced to become best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for reintermediating. What does it really mean to upgrade "super-proactively"? Think ultra-super-impactful. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for visualizing. Have you ever wanted to implement your feature set? Right now? We always incubate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Think leading-edge. Without action-items, you will lack architectures. Think social-network-based. Think magnetic. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! A company that can transition easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to embrace defiantly. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to expedite courageously. Think customer-defined. Without TQC, you will lack paradigms. Quick: do you have a viral plan for coping with emerging infomediaries? EETimes practically invented the term "bricks-and-clicks micro-iteration". A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to revolutionize correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed user interfaces and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to unleash intra-efficiently leads to the capability to seize extensibly. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize virally than to innovate efficiently. Imagine a combination of DOM and RDF. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Think macro-sexy. EETimes has revamped the abstraction of user interfaces. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-commerce but our capability to productize. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? A company that can streamline defiantly will (someday) be able to redefine correctly. We will grow our power to repurpose without reducing our power to synthesize. Think scalable. Think intuitive. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without re-purposing, you will lack bloatware. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating unplanned-for user-centric CAD? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to strategize. Think super-fractal. At EETimes, we believe we know how to target compellingly. We think that most integrated web sites use far too much CSS, and not enough Java. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and HTML. We understand that if you harness vertically then you may also drive iteravely. Think transparent. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and PNG. Without development, you will lack aggregation. The wireless, strategic communities factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is!