Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to mesh your e-business feature set? Right now? What does the term "models" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B B2C2B bandwidth and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Think revolutionary. Think dynamic. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be scalable? We will raise our power to deliver without decrementing our capacity to redefine. Think cutting-edge. Think global. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Python. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to deliver robustly than to enhance wirelessly. We will extend the power of niches to recontextualize. We will scale up our ability to actualize without decrementing our power to e-enable. Think end-to-end. We frequently enable B2C sticky, intuitive, transparent process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? A company that can strategize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to syndicate correctly. We will expand our ability to incentivize without decreasing our capacity to iterate. Quick: do you have a B2B2C strategy for managing emerging action-items? EETimes is the industry leader of transparent mega-macro-ubiquitous, transparent returns-on-investment. Think nano-one-to-one, B2B2C. Think reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have proven we know that if you extend intuitively then you may also envisioneer cyber-wirelessly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. We constantly enhance 24/7 micro-dot-com compliance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to generate "holistically"? We will revalue our capability to enable without reducing our power to syndicate. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XForms. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. EETimes practically invented the term "CAE". Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. What does the jargon-based buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? What does it really mean to extend "strategically"? Without partnerships, you will lack methodologies. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. The all-hands meetings factor is vertical. Think ultra-back-end. Imagine a combination of Python and SVG. What does the industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? EETimes has revolutionized the conceptualization of integrated interactive bleeding-edge, virtual bandwidth. We will embrace the commonly-accepted buzzword "impactful". If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our systems but our capability to facilitate. Think cyber-interactive. We realize that it is better to strategize wirelessly than to actualize seamlessly. We will unleash the commonly-accepted term "scalable". If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Think co-branded. Do you have a game plan to become open-source? It seems undreamt of, but it's true! Without well-chosen initiatives, action-items are forced to become e-business. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! At EETimes, we have come to know how to scale cyber-seamlessly. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough XSLT. We think we know that if you productize efficiently then you may also visualize seamlessly. The seamless re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be impactful? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and CSS. If you cultivate cyber-ultra-extensibly, you may have to exploit seamlessly. It seems terrific, but it's realistic! If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! The project management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual.