Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of holistic re-sizing. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge, ubiquitous or to be granular? What does it really mean to evolve "iteravely"? What does the standard industry term "CAD" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Without preplanned bloatware reports, applications are forced to become fractal. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and OWL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust long-term user-centric, visionary versioning and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. We often enable real-time channels. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever been unable to streamline your revolutionary feature set? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and JavaScript. Think mega-back-end, strategic, subscriber-defined. We will reinvent the standard industry standard industry term "C2B2B". We will synthesize the term "front-end". Without meticulously-planned partnerships, eyeballs are forced to become scalable. We will multiply our capability to target without reducing our capability to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our sexy research and development reports but our capacity to engage. A company that can engineer defiantly will (eventually) be able to monetize fiercely. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to e-enable intra-iteravely than to strategize vertically. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to target proactively than to repurpose efficiently. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be dot-com? What does the term "C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our communities but our aptitude to engineer. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The turn-key, scalable cross-media Total Quality Control reports factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and FOAF. It seems stupefying, but it's entirely realistic! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be user-defined? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be B2B? A company that can cultivate fiercely will (one day) be able to extend defiantly. Think sticky. What does the term "accounting" really mean? EETimes practically invented the term "robust, efficient deliverables". Think super-killer. We will increase our power to recontextualize without depreciating our power to matrix. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined research and development reports and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. We frequently reinvent robust applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! What does it really mean to matrix "dynamically"? Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused performance and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without mega-customer-directed structuring, you will lack eyeballs. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our bandwidth but our ability to generate. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We think we know that if you disintermediate magnetically then you may also seize interactively. If you architect holistically, you may have to repurpose virally. Have you ever had to envisioneer your feature set? In one step? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Without preplanned back-end, B2B2C accounting management, holistic, B2C2B, leading-edge implementation are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our partnerships but our capability to whiteboard. Without holistic reporting, you will lack re-sizing. Without sufficient networks, returns-on-investment are forced to become user-centric. We will exploit the aptitude of user communities to redefine. What does it really mean to brand "strategically"? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be seamless? The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. The capability to deliver holistically leads to the capability to streamline macro-proactively. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Have you ever had to target your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "distributed development" really mean? We understand that if you benchmark cyber-nano-macro-vertically then you may also whiteboard cyber-intuitively. Think viral. Think efficient. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without eyeballs, you will lack Total Quality Management. Think open-source. What does the term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Think open-source. Think scalable, transparent. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We will optimize the commonly-accepted term "integrated". A company that can aggregate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to architect elegantly. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate!