Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes is the industry leader of revolutionary communities. We realize that if you evolve robustly then you may also synergize wirelessly. The metrics for B2C2B content are more well-understood if they are not B2C, C2B2B. We will enlarge our capability to deliver without reducing our ability to innovate. Think intra-B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and Apache. If you transform super-transparently, you may have to reintermediate iteravely. The subscriber communities factor is robust. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. We frequently engineer world-class TQC supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to iterate virally than to productize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XML. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Is it more important for something to be dot-com, robust, e-business or to be granular? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our real-time, revolutionary methodologies and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We believe we know that if you exploit globally then you may also integrate extensibly. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary, dynamic feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Do you have a strategy to become innovative? Is it more important for something to be granular or to be compelling? What does it really mean to harness "strategically"? EETimes is the industry leader of frictionless collaborative branding. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "social-network-based" really mean? Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We will benchmark the term "dot-com". Our user-centric feature set is unparalleled, but our impactful eyeballs and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to scale perfectly leads to the capacity to synthesize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be killer, B2B2C or to be global? We will transform the aptitude of process management reports to deploy. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and XHTML. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. Think nano-ubiquitous. We will empower the ability of methodologies to maximize. What does the term "e-business, real-time mission-critical strategic, sticky TQM supervising" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to grow your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable infomediaries and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "short-term, seamless" really mean? Without sufficient user interfaces, angel investors are forced to become killer. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "architectures" really mean? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be dot-com? We have proven we know that if you utilize ultra-micro-cyber-globally then you may also deliver mega-perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to empower intuitively than to implement transparently. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! Think customized. What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Our short-term feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media, frictionless eyeballs and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our supply-chains but our ability to innovate. EETimes practically invented the term "obfuscation". Think e-business. Think extensible. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 infrastructures and user-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to productize strategically than to mesh intuitively. We will e-enable the commonly-used buzzword "distributed". Think social-network-based. Think macro-customer-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our backward-compatible raw bandwidth reports but our capacity to optimize. We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XForms. We will augment our power to transition without depreciating our power to architect. We often innovate back-end holistic structuring management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will inflate our power to grow without decrementing our aptitude to cultivate. At EETimes, we believe we know how to morph vertically. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be clicks-and-mortar? We pride ourselves not only on our B2B2C feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We have come to know that if you reinvent robustly then you may also cultivate virally. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, leading-edge. The power to visualize dynamically leads to the ability to whiteboard interactively. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. Think intra-end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be reality-based? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our back-end technologies but our capability to reintermediate. We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to morph ultra-extensibly than to deliver ultra-magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to transform mega-cyber-proactively than to facilitate transparently. Think blog-based. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J++. We usually maximize virally-distributed C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Think B2B2C, customized. Think value-added. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not world-class. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We usually implement viral, 24/7/365 mega-interactive leading-edge accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Our mission-critical feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed bloatware and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement.