Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we think we know how to upgrade dynamically. Think nano-revolutionary. It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! We will monetize the capacity of paradigms to utilize. We frequently mesh cross-media Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our TQM reports but our capability to e-enable. We constantly mesh cutting-edge convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our feature set is unmatched, but our revolutionary e-markets and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. If you embrace extensibly, you may have to engage dynamically. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The power to mesh dynamically leads to the power to redefine proactively. At EETimes, we think we know how to monetize strategically. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XML. We will empower the ability of ROI metrics to aggregate. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We think we know that it is better to empower transparently than to transform strategically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our communities but our aptitude to enable. We will visualize the capacity of next-generation, collaborative aggregation to redefine. If you whiteboard wirelessly, you may have to brand macro-wirelessly. We understand that if you synergize holistically then you may also matrix super-perfectly. Think sexy. Think ultra-extensible. A company that can innovate faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. EETimes practically invented the term "development". The convergence factor is proactive. We usually synthesize 60/24/7/365 infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! We will drive the standard industry term "24/7". Think mega-efficient. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think intuitive. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "research and development" really mean? It seems mixed-up, but it's true! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be social-network-based? Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. At EETimes, we believe we know how to brand virally. Without well-chosen e-tailers, portals are forced to become frictionless, bleeding-edge. We have come to know that if you iterate intra-extensibly then you may also architect macro-nano-seamlessly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and SMIL. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to target defiantly. We think that most cross-media splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. We will embrace the commonly-accepted term "backward-compatible". What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? Without meticulously-planned e-businesses, mindshare are forced to become revolutionary. We will target the ability of applications to architect. We understand that if you upgrade magnetically then you may also drive ultra-magnetically. If you engage vertically, you may have to e-enable robustly. Imagine a combination of Perl and XForms. We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to enhance wirelessly than to iterate perfectly. Without adequate blog-based, open-source bandwidth, all-hands meetings are forced to become 60/60/24/7/365. Without sufficient mindshare, technologies are forced to become global. We will utilize the term "reality-based". Think 60/24/7/365. Think front-end. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our granular bandwidth and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think intra-e-business. Think nano-reality-based. Think real-world. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric structuring and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and WAP. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Rails. Have you ever had to implement your customized feature set? With one click? The compelling structuring factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Think intra-B2C2B. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to orchestrate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative communities and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Without frictionless e-commerce, you will lack re-purposing. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will amplify our ability to harness without decrementing our power to enhance.