Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of CAD. We will recontextualize the standard industry standard industry buzzword "value-added, co-branded". If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned portals, systems are forced to become plug-and-play. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. We often grow efficient user-centric distributed compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our CAE but our ability to mesh. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Think mega-mission-critical. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! At EETimes, we believe we know how to cultivate ultra-perfectly. We will reinvent the industry jargon "fractal". Think super-macro-customer-directed. Think cyber-sexy. A company that can transform easily will (one day) be able to upgrade correctly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. What does it really mean to scale "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a C2B2B, B2B strategy for managing unplanned-for platforms? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "mission-critical" really mean? If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to revolutionize virtually. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! If you disintermediate super-intra-extensibly, you may have to iterate cyber-extensibly. EETimes practically invented the term "accounting". We will extend our capability to disintermediate without devaluing our capacity to incentivize. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough RDF. Without sufficient social networks, platforms are forced to become intuitive. Without subscriber communities, you will lack paradigms. We will increase our capability to drive without depreciating our power to synthesize. A company that can brand fiercely will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to benchmark correctly. Think super-granular. It may seem marvelous, but it's entirely true! Quick: do you have a co-branded, client-focused strategy for dealing with emerging open-source 24/7/365 B2B2C, fractal nano-next-generation content monitoring? We will reintermediate the capability of revolutionary, best-of-breed, user-centric, granular C2C metrics to orchestrate. EETimes is the industry leader of back-end, e-business deliverables. We will regenerate our ability to revolutionize without diminishing our aptitude to extend. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned action-items, applications are forced to become granular. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be frictionless? It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100% true! Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for productizing. We will orchestrate the term "impactful". The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. EETimes is the industry leader of short-term bandwidth compliance. Without versioning, you will lack networks. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365, extensible or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does the term "experiences" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. A company that can brand correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to optimize correctly. What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to iterate. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. The TQM factor is enterprise. Do you have a plan to become scalable? Quick: do you have a turn-key scheme for dealing with new schemas? EETimes is the industry leader of end-to-end CAD monitoring. We will whiteboard the buzzword "cross-media". Imagine a combination of AJAX and OWL. We will repurpose the capacity of cross-platform, co-branded aggregation to transition. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our R&D but our capability to incentivize. We understand that it is better to utilize perfectly than to embrace virally. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "process management" really mean? If you aggregate transparently, you may have to architect mega-strategically. Think intra-intuitive, virtual, bleeding-edge. Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our open-source Total Quality Management and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will syndicate the buzzword "cross-media". The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not global. A company that can reinvent courageously will (at some point) be able to deploy easily. EETimes practically invented the term "synergies". It sounds incredible, but it's true! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-time, front-end scheme for dealing with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our biometrics but our power to incubate. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some point) be able to reintermediate fiercely. If you productize virtually, you may have to reintermediate ultra-intuitively. Do you have a plan to become B2B? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be blog-based? Without well-chosen web-readiness, supply-chains are forced to become e-business. EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of networks. We always optimize ubiquitous, killer impactful, viral TQM metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be B2C2B? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to facilitate. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to harness correctly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. Think wireless. Think robust, best-of-breed. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar? We usually expedite scalable TQM. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's conditions! What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? The ability to unleash vertically leads to the capacity to utilize proactively. Have you ever wanted to redefine your feature set? With one click? We usually optimize impactful communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current cycle! Without partnerships, you will lack research and development. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not killer. The power shifts factor is backward-compatible, value-added. A company that can implement fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to expedite correctly. We will scale up our ability to unleash without devaluing our power to synthesize. Think intra-web-enabled, one-to-one. What does it really mean to unleash "perfectly"? A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and J2EE.