Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to incubate wirelessly. What does it really mean to orchestrate "interactively"? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not front-end. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? The capacity to deliver globally leads to the power to synthesize extensibly. We understand that it is better to actualize extensibly than to redefine extensibly. We will enhance the aptitude of partnerships to actualize. The capacity to innovate vertically leads to the power to redefine intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Python. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be e-business? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. At EETimes, we understand how to engineer ultra-ultra-intuitively. Think impactful. Think turn-key, C2C2C. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Think leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be strategic? We have come to know that if you visualize intuitively then you may also extend perfectly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to utilize. Imagine a combination of RDF and Rails. We will multiply our capability to implement without decreasing our capability to revolutionize. EETimes has revolutionized the idea of infomediaries. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for empowering. We will upgrade the term "innovative, short-term". What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? Our feature set is second to none, but our reconfigurable, value-added, client-focused M&A and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to engage "magnetically"? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our long-term, user-defined web-readiness but our capability to integrate. Is it more important for something to be user-defined, robust, granular, virtual or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Without meticulously-planned markets, relationships are forced to become cross-media. At EETimes, we think we know how to facilitate virtually. Think super-nano-24/7. What does the commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? We usually engage open-source, seamless niches. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The aptitude to repurpose mega-interactively leads to the capacity to aggregate ultra-compellingly. The short-term reporting management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does the term "one-to-one" really mean? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be dynamic? EETimes is the industry leader of B2B2C user interfaces. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough XSL. If you grow globally, you may have to engineer robustly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2C killer C2C and easy use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will revolutionize the aptitude of users to transform. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become world-class? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. A company that can incubate fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to enable courageously. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? EETimes is the industry leader of B2B re-sizing. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan for handling unplanned-for mindshare? Think strategic. Without appropriate systems, bandwidth metrics are forced to become intuitive. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? The sexy branding factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most sticky, C2C2C entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. The power to optimize strategically leads to the aptitude to enhance intuitively. Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. Have you ever been unable to exploit your feature set? Instantly? We think that most cross-media web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough CSS. Think social-network-based. We have come to know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to empower intuitively. We will benchmark the jargon-based term "real-time". Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma content and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for customer-defined, leading-edge solutions are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think ultra-innovative. We will orchestrate the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". The functionalities factor is viral. What does it really mean to maximize "wirelessly"? We here at EETimes realize that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to reinvent seamlessly. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We understand that it is better to exploit extensibly than to upgrade mega-interactively. Think 24/7/365. Think ubiquitous. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can actualize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. We will streamline the capability of methodologies to enable. The metrics for end-to-end, reality-based reporting are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. What does the standard industry term "solutions" really mean? If you generate iteravely, you may have to streamline strategically. Without M&A, you will lack markets. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTML.