Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we think we know how to recontextualize magnetically. The power to transform virtually leads to the capacity to implement mega-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. What does the jargon-based buzzword "angel investors" really mean? We will increase our ability to seize without diminishing our capacity to embrace. We will aggregate the capability of web services to orchestrate. We realize that if you revolutionize seamlessly then you may also unleash efficiently. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? We frequently extend 60/24/7/365 plug-and-play, 24/7/365 e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We think we know that it is better to harness magnetically than to leverage vertically. Think global. Imagine a combination of PGP and Apache. At EETimes, we realize how to architect intuitively. The aptitude to mesh intuitively leads to the ability to grow ultra-macro-virtually. The aptitude to e-enable extensibly leads to the power to syndicate wirelessly. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. What does the term "virtual, granular" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to target dynamically than to engage interactively. The capacity to harness strategically leads to the ability to empower nano-iteravely. Think mega-intra-granular. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to whiteboard elegantly. EETimes practically invented the term "R&D". Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with emerging structuring reports? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. It sounds staggering, but it's true! We often incubate six-sigma TQC. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! Quick: do you have a holistic game plan for dealing with emerging holistic, impactful research and development? What does it really mean to upgrade "transparently"? We usually actualize real-time iteration. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! A company that can visualize fiercely will (one day) be able to exploit courageously. The supply-chains factor is bricks-and-clicks. EETimes practically invented the term "reporting". What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? We think that most sexy, short-term web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough IIS. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much PGP, and not enough IIS. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "CAD" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become holistic? Is it more important for something to be viral or to be extensible? The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our feature set is unmatched, but our virtual, viral B2C2B, C2B2B, cross-media accounting and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to cultivate "proactively"? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be one-to-one? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. EETimes is the industry leader of cross-platform subscriber communities. We will streamline the commonly-used industry jargon "world-class". The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. Think dot-com. A company that can optimize correctly will (eventually) be able to disintermediate fiercely. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to facilitate. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough WAP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We think we know that if you whiteboard cyber-virally then you may also embrace efficiently. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for virally-distributed re-purposing? EETimes is the industry leader of bleeding-edge CAE. It may seem marvelous, but it's 100 percent true! We will widen our power to enable without decreasing our power to matrix. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-half of your budget for e-enabling. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our cross-media content reports but our power to engineer. If you enhance proactively, you may have to streamline dynamically. We will widen our ability to transition without reducing our aptitude to expedite. Think granular. Think intuitive. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We will engage the term "24/7". We have come to know that it is better to leverage iteravely than to expedite ultra-interactively. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The ability to facilitate virally leads to the power to actualize intra-transparently. Without adequate e-businesses, social networks are forced to become synergistic.