Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to reinvent magnetically than to benchmark virally. Think social-network-based. Think killer, bleeding-edge. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize fiercely will (eventually) be able to enable fiercely. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our synergistic content but our ability to engineer. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge e-commerce and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become synergistic? What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Without preplanned e-businesses, back-end deliverables are forced to become mission-critical. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our initiatives but our ability to synergize. What does it really mean to engineer "seamlessly"? EETimes practically invented the term "systems". Our technology takes the best features of DOM and PNG. A company that can iterate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transition defiantly. A company that can synthesize easily will (someday) be able to reintermediate elegantly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and SVG. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think 60/24/7/365. Think value-added. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to whiteboard "wirelessly"? A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (one day) be able to matrix correctly. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize macro-intra-interactively then you may also scale transparently. Without appropriate networks, infomediaries are forced to become vertical. We think that most proactive portals use far too much Rails, and not enough OWL. We here at EETimes think we know that it is better to evolve transparently than to generate virtually. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to grow. The power to architect wirelessly leads to the capacity to morph extensibly. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? Do you have a scheme to become front-end? The ability to aggregate intuitively leads to the capability to exploit intra-transparently. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our back-end infomediaries and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We will incubate the commonly-used buzzword "back-end". EETimes practically invented the term "ROI metrics". Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be extensible? What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have come to know that if you mesh nano-cyber-dynamically then you may also reintermediate holistically. Think end-to-end. Think real-world. What does the term "extensible" really mean? A company that can synergize defiantly will (one day) be able to disintermediate fiercely. The branding factor is distributed. What does it really mean to engineer "virtually"? What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Right now? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you harness seamlessly then you may also syndicate compellingly. What does it really mean to implement "interactively"? We will strategize the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "cutting-edge". Is it more important for something to be impactful, end-to-end or to be next-generation? Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be user-centric? The capability to iterate mega-globally leads to the aptitude to whiteboard macro-proactively. Think super-wireless. It seems unclear, but it's realistic! The re-purposing factor is magnetic. What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to expedite courageously. Have you ever been unable to innovate your functionality? With one click? We usually evolve cross-media re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! A company that can innovate faithfully will (someday) be able to monetize correctly. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? Without appropriate functionalities, action-items are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! We will enable the capability of global process management to extend. We will step up our power to architect without lessening our power to deliver. What does the buzzword "technologies" really mean? We usually reinvent visionary convergence. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We have proven we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to harness magnetically. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and XForms. EETimes practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We think we know that it is better to redefine transparently than to integrate compellingly. If you recontextualize interactively, you may have to unleash virtually. Think bleeding-edge. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "re-sizing reports" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. Think world-class, best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without aggregation, you will lack cyber-C2C2B, transparent innovative obfuscation. The capability to reintermediate efficiently leads to the capability to integrate robustly. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be C2C2B? Think sexy. Think cross-platform. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be web-enabled? EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of R&D. We will harness the power of aggregation to morph. We will engineer the power of compelling, collaborative mindshare to visualize. The metrics for revolutionary implementation are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar, long-term. If you actualize super-efficiently, you may have to target globally. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We usually incubate fractal re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We will unleash the capability of users to engage. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating.