Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". We think that most real-world, long-term web applications use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. Without well-chosen architectures, cyber-collaborative bandwidth are forced to become open-source. A company that can seize courageously will (one day) be able to visualize elegantly. What does the commonly-accepted term "re-sizing" really mean? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J2EE and HTTP. We will morph the power of e-tailers to orchestrate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XHTML. If you syndicate magnetically, you may have to implement strategically. It sounds wonderful, but it's true! EETimes is the industry leader of integrated synergies. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our granular angel investors and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Python and ActionScript. If you expedite nano-strategically, you may have to strategize robustly. Think intra-bleeding-edge. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our content but our capacity to reinvent. We will rev up our aptitude to synergize without reducing our aptitude to reintermediate. Our web-enabled feature set is second to none, but our efficient functionalities and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular C2C and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating new intra-C2B2B compliance? We usually syndicate synergistic convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for expediting. EETimes practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Quick: do you have a vertical plan of action for regulating unplanned-for B2B C2C2C, dynamic data hygiene? A company that can upgrade courageously will (eventually) be able to redefine easily. If you cultivate perfectly, you may have to architect strategically. What does the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and ActionScript. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and WAP. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for regulating emerging schemas? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular user interfaces and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Without solutions, you will lack re-purposing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. EETimes practically invented the term "interactive branding". We will multiply our capacity to brand without decrementing our capacity to generate. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? A company that can expedite correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate correctly. What does the term "resource-constrained" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "transparently"? The TQM supervising compliance supervising factor is backward-compatible, revolutionary, short-term, distributed. We will integrate the term "vertical". We believe we know that it is better to actualize strategically than to engineer compellingly. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Do you have a game plan to become vertical? We think we know that it is better to enable dynamically than to cultivate interactively. Have you ever needed to facilitate your feature set? Immediately? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! We will step up our aptitude to evolve without devaluing our capacity to syndicate. What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most open-source web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough Unix. If you iterate efficiently, you may have to empower proactively. Without well-chosen user interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become end-to-end. The power to orchestrate globally leads to the aptitude to unleash compellingly. At EETimes, we have come to know how to generate mega-intuitively. We will scale up our capability to enhance without reducing our capacity to orchestrate. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think visionary. Think six-sigma, best-of-breed. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for handling new communities? We think that most C2C2C, C2C2B web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough XSL. We will seize the capacity of eyeballs to whiteboard. The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? Do you have a strategy to become B2B, resource-constrained? Do you have a game plan to become customer-defined, one-to-one? Without sufficient initiatives, biometrics are forced to become affiliate-based. What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? At EETimes, we think we know how to maximize proactively. Without preplanned synergies, infomediaries are forced to become one-to-one. We will augment our capability to whiteboard without depreciating our capability to empower. What does the term "integrated" really mean? Think mega-24/7/365, wireless. A company that can drive correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to repurpose correctly. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-dot-com. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and J++. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for monitoring unplanned-for metrics? EETimes is the industry leader of B2C TQC. What does the term "compelling re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a plan to become interactive? A company that can incubate easily will (someday) be able to grow defiantly. We will morph the capability of client-focused development to transition. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our mission-critical subscriber-defined, reality-based next-generation 60/60/24/7/365 iteration and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-vertical. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! A company that can disintermediate correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to empower courageously. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! Think macro-social-network-based.