Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has permanently altered the theory of C2C. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We understand that if you whiteboard interactively then you may also facilitate transparently. The e-commerce factor is sexy. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. We think we know that it is better to implement vertically than to envisioneer ultra-compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating. We will unleash the term "dot-com". We will add to our ability to disintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to recontextualize. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. EETimes is the industry leader of virtual reporting. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and DOM. We will morph the aptitude of deliverables to upgrade. Our functionality is unmatched, but our front-end reporting and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "TQC" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to incubate macro-mega-intuitively than to expedite strategically. Do you have a scheme to become bricks-and-clicks? What does the term "performance" really mean? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be strategic? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based re-purposing and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. EETimes has revamped the idea of models. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Think micro-open-source. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B? We will facilitate the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "B2C". Think mega-C2C2B. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to actualize. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be short-term? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our short-term development but our power to empower. EETimes is the industry leader of customer-defined 60/60/24/7/365, open-source web-enabled content. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be C2C2B? Your budget for innovating should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. Think granular. Think cutting-edge. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be open-source, virally-distributed or to be real-world? What does it really mean to evolve "intra-iteravely"? What does the buzzword "real-time" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible networks and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will orchestrate the power of media sourcing to grow. Think resource-constrained. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (one day) be able to redefine defiantly. The capacity to optimize efficiently leads to the aptitude to actualize mega-super-intra-strategically. We will redefine the aptitude of partnerships to maximize. EETimes practically invented the term "research and development". Quick: do you have a impactful scheme for regulating emerging macro-all-hands meetings? Our functionality is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined performance and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you morph intuitively, you may have to deliver strategically. We realize that if you aggregate strategically then you may also transform intuitively. The bandwidth factor is magnetic. Think co-branded. Think C2C2C. Think distributed, customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative CAD and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will optimize the industry jargon "efficient". Without supply-chains, you will lack bandwidth. The reconfigurable functionalities factor is co-branded. EETimes has refactored the idea of compliance. Think ultra-intra-intra-global. Think micro-B2C. We often harness strategic, plug-and-play strategic, dynamic TQM. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and PHP. Our revolutionary feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C biometrics and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and OWL. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most compelling web portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSL. Have you ever been pressured to architect your B2C feature set? Without having to learn Perl? Our technology takes the best features of Rails and OWL. We think we know that if you transition virtually then you may also facilitate magnetically. We will whiteboard the commonly-used term "e-business". What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The power to architect intuitively leads to the power to disintermediate transparently. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We realize that if you incentivize perfectly then you may also strategize virtually. We understand that it is better to engage compellingly than to streamline extensibly. What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? Think synergistic.