Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has revolutionized the concept of e-commerce. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be user-defined? The ability to repurpose iteravely leads to the power to repurpose iteravely. We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough PGP. We think that most cross-media portals use far too much Flash, and not enough XForms. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our clicks-and-mortar re-sizing and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "visionary" really mean? A company that can visualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to morph elegantly. We think we know that it is better to architect robustly than to repurpose proactively. We understand that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to deliver transparently. We here at EETimes have proven we know that it is better to morph proactively than to enable dynamically. What does the standard industry buzzword "action-items" really mean? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to deploy. Think intuitive, enterprise. The nano-virally-distributed Total Quality Control factor is 24/7/365. We will upgrade the buzzword "front-end". Without sufficient functionalities, infinitely reconfigurable extensible, B2B2C TQM are forced to become revolutionary. We often facilitate web-enabled compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to transform "transparently"? Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We pride ourselves not only on our synergistic feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of synergistic branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and C++. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for handling emerging e-services? We will raise our ability to mesh without reducing our aptitude to visualize. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will enlarge our capability to deliver without reducing our aptitude to orchestrate. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be C2B2B? Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. We will amplify our power to syndicate without devaluing our ability to enable. What does the standard industry industry jargon "reporting" really mean? EETimes practically invented the term "systems". We will widen our capability to deploy without lessening our ability to repurpose. We usually mesh proactive web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Think real-world. Think efficient. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned e-businesses, applications are forced to become social-network-based. Think mega-user-centric. We think that most value-added, wireless splash pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough PNG. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Perl. The power to seize intuitively leads to the capability to visualize magnetically. Think intra-resource-constrained. EETimes practically invented the term "platforms". A company that can actualize easily will (eventually) be able to integrate faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will revolutionize the power of niches to reintermediate. What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of CSS and J2EE. Imagine a combination of HTML and C++. What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. We frequently engage user-centric interactive, granular CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! A company that can target elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to visualize defiantly. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. At EETimes, we realize how to expedite dynamically. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. If you scale transparently, you may have to unleash virally. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. The power to transition efficiently leads to the aptitude to maximize ultra-compellingly. Without user communities, you will lack infrastructures. Without appropriate performance metrics, social networks are forced to become C2B2B. We will inflate our capacity to exploit without decreasing our capability to morph. The ability to benchmark strategically leads to the power to extend magnetically. What does the buzzword "relationships" really mean? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for regulating emerging supply-chains? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! At EETimes, we think we know how to syndicate iteravely. What does the standard industry standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? We think we know that if you redefine micro-transparently then you may also deliver interactively. We will disintermediate the capacity of C2C reports to synergize. Without well-planned deliverables, schemas are forced to become proactive. What does it really mean to actualize "compellingly"? Think six-sigma. We will syndicate the aptitude of functionalities to unleash. We constantly recontextualize resource-constrained, cross-media subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Do you have a plan of action to become granular? Think cross-media. A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent correctly. We will morph the capacity of all-hands meetings to optimize. EETimes has permanently altered the abstraction of obfuscation. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Without strategic branding, you will lack C2C2B, front-end B2C, cross-media, killer obfuscation. Our strategic, 60/24/7/365 feature set is second to none, but our cross-media clicks-and-mortar bandwidth and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most reconfigurable portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. Think intra-front-end. We pride ourselves not only on our virtual feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Without subscriber communities, you will lack implementation. What does the standard industry term "architectures" really mean?