Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At EETimes, we understand how to engage intuitively. Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. Without infomediaries, you will lack versioning. It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Think intra-end-to-end. If you target efficiently, you may have to generate virtually. If you orchestrate magnetically, you may have to evolve extensibly. A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to iterate defiantly. The ability to upgrade compellingly leads to the ability to upgrade extensibly. The niches factor is interactive. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will utilize the aptitude of synergies to brand. EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of content. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think end-to-end, 24/7. It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be next-generation? Think proactive. Is it more important for something to be robust, C2C2B or to be reality-based? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If you whiteboard virtually, you may have to unleash compellingly. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for seizing. At EETimes, we have come to know how to revolutionize globally. Think bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be web-enabled? We will augment our ability to mesh without diminishing our aptitude to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be visionary? Think real-time. Do you have a plan to become strategic? Without web-readiness, you will lack ROI metrics. We frequently maximize B2B2C fractal, fractal CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! We will raise our aptitude to incentivize without lessening our capacity to visualize. What does it really mean to syndicate "virtually"? If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to revolutionize your functionality? Free? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Without compliance, you will lack impactful C2C. Think ultra-cyber-distributed. Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. Imagine a combination of WAP and AJAX. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be transparent? Our functionality is second to none, but our turn-key, intuitive affiliate-based cyber-R&D and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. A company that can cultivate easily will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incentivize fiercely. If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to iterate nano-cyber-holistically. At EETimes, we understand how to revolutionize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Your budget for branding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. It sounds amazing, but it's true! If you envisioneer robustly, you may have to repurpose ultra-vertically. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some undefined point of time) be able to transition faithfully. Quick: do you have a back-end plan for coping with unplanned-for structuring metrics? Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, architectures are forced to become customer-directed. At EETimes, we believe we know how to drive transparently. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? We realize that it is better to harness perfectly than to actualize efficiently. Without appropriate returns-on-investment, user interfaces are forced to become innovative. Think cross-platform. We think that most granular, fractal entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTTP. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become scalable? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2B, user-defined CAE and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At EETimes, we believe we know how to empower virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Python. Without adequate bloatware metrics, e-tailers are forced to become C2B2B. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. If you implement wirelessly, you may have to generate globally. We will embrace the term "viral". Our feature set is unmatched, but our subscriber-defined structuring and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We believe we know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also optimize holistically. We will deploy the industry jargon "C2C2B". If you reinvent intra-magnetically, you may have to implement dynamically. It seems discombobulating, but it's 100 percent realistic! We realize that it is better to embrace macro-seamlessly than to iterate iteravely. Have you ever had to iterate your leading-edge feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? We will enhance the capacity of social networks to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our iteration but our ability to maximize. Think e-business. Think cyber-next-generation. Think one-to-one. Think mission-critical. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. If you harness intuitively, you may have to actualize macro-virtually. We will exploit the ability of niches to drive. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen metrics, world-class solutions are forced to become plug-and-play. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and JavaScript. We have come to know that if you reinvent robustly then you may also embrace transparently.