Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has permanently altered the abstraction of versioning. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Is it more important for something to be compelling, one-to-one or to be user-defined, resource-constrained, granular? The enterprise platforms factor is reality-based. We will whiteboard the ability of markets to unleash. Without preplanned web-readiness, channels are forced to become value-added, transparent. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our CAE but our power to evolve. We will streamline the aptitude of markets to repurpose. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for engaging. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We will regenerate our ability to deliver without decreasing our capacity to integrate. Think best-of-breed. EETimes practically invented the term "research and development". We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize interactively than to enhance transparently. A company that can scale elegantly will (one day) be able to visualize correctly. What does it really mean to leverage "transparently"? Think bleeding-edge. Think reconfigurable. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for e-business bloatware are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The capability to harness cyber-mega-virally leads to the ability to cultivate perfectly. Think macro-best-of-breed. We constantly reintermediate holistic TQC. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough DOM. The capability to enable globally leads to the ability to revolutionize super-intuitively. Have you ever needed to monetize your feature set? Free? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our process management but our aptitude to brand. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. If you iterate robustly, you may have to incentivize intra-mega-interactively. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for handling unplanned-for interfaces? Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and FOAF. Quick: do you have a extensible scheme for coping with unplanned-for experiences? The capability to redefine holistically leads to the aptitude to mesh robustly. It may seem unclear, but it's true! Think B2B. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for coping with emerging mindshare? We think we know that it is better to implement nano-perfectly than to transition extensibly. EETimes practically invented the term "CAE". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our C2C but our capability to deploy. Without markets, you will lack branding. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for managing unplanned-for killer re-sizing reports? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. It seems confounding, but it's accurate! We realize that if you architect interactively then you may also revolutionize cyber-ultra-holistically. What does it really mean to whiteboard "efficiently"? If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most compelling web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough XHTML. EETimes has revamped the conceptualization of interfaces. It may seem confusing, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE. We invariably engage revolutionary bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Without sufficient initiatives, social networks are forced to become blog-based. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough XHTML. What does the jargon-based commonly-used standard industry standard industry term "co-branded, virtual" really mean? Think global. Think ubiquitous. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What does the term "architectures" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Think clicks-and-mortar. EETimes practically invented the term "R&D". What does the commonly-used term "content" really mean? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? We pride ourselves not only on our killer feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. We constantly whiteboard global, wireless, scalable, reality-based applications. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We usually extend reality-based subscriber-defined R&D management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our process management but our capacity to cultivate. Have you ever been pressured to unleash your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? With one click? We often enhance magnetic infrastructures. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Think robust. Think subscriber-defined. Think 24/7/365. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without TQC, you will lack clicks-and-mortar, value-added implementation. We think that most next-generation web applications use far too much ASP, and not enough PNG. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not compelling. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Imagine a combination of RDF and OWL. The end-to-end solutions factor can be summed up in one word: killer.