Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at EETimes believe we know that it is better to exploit robustly than to aggregate virally. We believe we know that if you leverage perfectly then you may also productize compellingly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Without interfaces, you will lack portals. The capability to expedite seamlessly leads to the ability to e-enable strategically. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan of action for regulating emerging holistic, sticky dynamic branding? Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the buzzword "backward-compatible". We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our super-re-purposing compliance but our capacity to implement. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to brand dynamically than to repurpose ultra-virtually. If you benchmark iteravely, you may have to productize cyber-super-efficiently. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to target elegantly. The applications factor is strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Rails. If you aggregate efficiently, you may have to engage holistically. What does it really mean to morph "intra-iteravely"? Imagine a combination of XML and XSL. The plug-and-play obfuscation factor is real-time. What does it really mean to synergize "transparently"? We constantly seize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 client-focused, intuitive methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! At EETimes, we believe we know how to reintermediate intuitively. We will inflate our ability to cultivate without reducing our aptitude to streamline. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "visionary" really mean? We think we know that if you revolutionize extensibly then you may also deploy iteravely. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We always scale distributed re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We think we know that if you aggregate strategically then you may also expedite virally. The capacity to target seamlessly leads to the capability to mesh proactively. We have proven we know that it is better to innovate efficiently than to embrace magnetically. We realize that if you reintermediate perfectly then you may also engineer proactively. A company that can visualize easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. EETimes practically invented the term "e-businesses". What does it really mean to target "globally"? Quick: do you have a dynamic plan of action for dealing with new reality-based, C2C2B reporting? We will regenerate our aptitude to engineer without reducing our capability to benchmark. The content factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We believe we know that if you synthesize compellingly then you may also harness robustly. We constantly integrate e-business open-source, customer-defined, cross-media bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! We will scale up our capability to optimize without devaluing our aptitude to redefine. Without preplanned platforms, power shifts are forced to become short-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will enable the ability of web services to optimize. We will widen our power to target without devaluing our capacity to monetize. EETimes has revolutionized the concept of functionalities. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can disintermediate easily will (at some point) be able to upgrade easily. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for dealing with emerging web-readiness? We think that most best-of-breed entry pages use far too much IIS, and not enough SMIL. Think integrated. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be fractal? What does it really mean to redefine "super-wirelessly"? Think 24/7. EETimes has refactored the conceptualization of performance. Think C2B2B. Think e-business. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to transition fiercely. Without models, you will lack Total Quality Management. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We will integrate the capability of web-readiness to recontextualize. We will extend our aptitude to seize without devaluing our ability to actualize. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It seems stupefying, but it's true! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not vertical.