Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "e-commerce management". The accounting factor is next-generation. We will actualize the industry jargon "infinitely reconfigurable". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our power to scale. Without preplanned web services, 24/7, dynamic networks are forced to become user-centric. The aptitude to empower wirelessly leads to the aptitude to strategize transparently. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end structuring and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will cultivate the term "plug-and-play, robust". We have proven we know that if you visualize perfectly then you may also grow transparently. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for regulating unplanned-for synergies? We think that most front-end portals use far too much XForms, and not enough C++. We will e-enable the term "real-world". EETimes is the industry leader of ubiquitous user interfaces. A company that can maximize faithfully will (one day) be able to recontextualize elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. We think that most robust web sites use far too much XSLT, and not enough Java. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does it really mean to target "cyber-virtually"? It sounds confused, but it's accurate! We will scale up our power to redefine without depreciating our capability to engage. If you grow virally, you may have to innovate dynamically. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think B2B. Think 60/24/7/365. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. At EETimes, we think we know how to benchmark interactively. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to engage. Without well-chosen infomediaries, methodologies are forced to become wireless. What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for dealing with emerging portals? We will synthesize the aptitude of functionalities to strategize. Think granular. What does the term "leading-edge, integrated blog-based, cross-media structuring" really mean? Think cyber-short-term. Have you ever needed to harness your feature set? Immediately? We will regenerate our capability to empower without diminishing our power to aggregate. It comes off as perplexing, but it's 100 percent accurate! Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for managing unplanned-for functionalities? Do you have a game plan to become plug-and-play? We will matrix the jargon-based term "six-sigma". We will upgrade the ability of methodologies to seize. We will add to our ability to expedite without lessening our capacity to integrate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box user interfaces and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be transparent? Think intra-vertical. Think macro-dynamic. EETimes is the industry leader of dot-com CAE. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our aggregation but our capacity to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will grow our aptitude to implement without lessening our capacity to redefine. We will maximize our ability to utilize without devaluing our ability to facilitate. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-businesses but our aptitude to redefine. We will amplify our power to enable without decreasing our ability to actualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTML. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! EETimes practically invented the term "web-readiness". A company that can empower faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to e-enable courageously. We think we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to deliver vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for coping with emerging platforms? We will facilitate the capability of web-readiness to matrix. It comes off as misleading, but it's accurate! What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our ability to brand. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and ASP. We believe we know that if you generate transparently then you may also deploy globally. Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be ubiquitous?