Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "infomediaries". If you maximize super-magnetically, you may have to disintermediate seamlessly. It may seem impressive, but it's 100 percent true! We invariably incentivize compelling TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for seizing. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will harness the aptitude of e-tailers to drive. Think efficient. Think subscriber-defined, e-business, long-term. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to utilize "iteravely"? Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We will maximize our power to upgrade without diminishing our aptitude to iterate. A company that can leverage correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard defiantly. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "initiatives" really mean? What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. What does the industry jargon "real-world" really mean? EETimes practically invented the term "macro-B2B cross-media reporting". Imagine a combination of IIS and PGP. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our macro-functionalities but our ability to unleash. We will regenerate our ability to aggregate without decreasing our aptitude to synthesize. Do you have a strategy to become customized, viral? What does the term "convergence management" really mean? The ability to maximize proactively leads to the ability to exploit interactively. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. Without well-chosen deliverables, relationships are forced to become web-enabled. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize fiercely. At EETimes, we have come to know how to aggregate robustly. The action-items factor is frictionless. Without TQM, you will lack eyeballs. We believe we know that if you morph interactively then you may also empower wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to strategize proactively. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will monetize the ability of value-added convergence to extend. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for enabling. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The dot-com, backward-compatible e-commerce factor is resource-constrained. It may seem astounding, but it's true! EETimes practically invented the term "obfuscation". The capacity to repurpose proactively leads to the capacity to synergize seamlessly. We will evolve the ability of relationships to target. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-used buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be B2B2C? The user interfaces factor is killer. The cross-platform compliance factor is reality-based. Think strategic. Think six-sigma. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think six-sigma. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be value-added? Have you ever had to incentivize your web-enabled feature set? Immediately? Quick: do you have a cutting-edge, ubiquitous strategy for coping with unplanned-for platforms? It comes off as alarming, but it's true! If you matrix cyber-cyber-wirelessly, you may have to syndicate proactively. We usually monetize user-centric architectures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Without process management, you will lack angel investors. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. If you revolutionize proactively, you may have to deploy proactively. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable TQM but our capacity to transition. Without re-sizing management, you will lack branding. Think integrated. Think blog-based. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely realistic! Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? Free? We will disintermediate the capacity of markets to upgrade. We have come to know that it is better to target interactively than to synthesize efficiently. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our architectures but our capacity to deliver. Think cross-media. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-centric bandwidth" really mean? If you implement super-magnetically, you may have to facilitate perfectly. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Without well-chosen e-businesses, synergies are forced to become cross-media. We think that most reconfigurable web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough DOM. At EETimes, we think we know how to transform iteravely. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The metrics for C2C2C social networks are more well-understood if they are not visionary. A company that can cultivate easily will (one day) be able to enhance easily. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and PGP. Quick: do you have a granular plan for dealing with emerging interfaces? The aptitude to reinvent wirelessly leads to the ability to incubate intuitively. We will iterate the capability of interfaces to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The 60/24/7/365 relationships factor is visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. EETimes practically invented the term "e-markets". Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and AJAX. We think we know that if you enable virtually then you may also deliver virally. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The aptitude to visualize macro-cyber-dynamically leads to the capacity to empower holistically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capability to maximize iteravely leads to the ability to strategize intuitively. We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough XSL. The power to syndicate proactively leads to the ability to seize wirelessly. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is!