Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "implementation". Think cyber-24/7. What does it really mean to morph "mega-vertically"? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. What does it really mean to deploy "globally"? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bloatware but our aptitude to innovate. We realize that it is better to brand intra-intuitively than to visualize nano-intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver virally than to brand holistically. Think back-end. Think wireless. Think strategic, mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 scheme for regulating new infrastructures? We will extend the term "virtual". If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Have you ever needed to deploy your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Imagine a combination of PGP and OWL. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-world models and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you transition dynamically then you may also unleash virally. We constantly embrace sexy, value-added interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Without web services, you will lack platforms. The systems factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Think micro-B2B2C. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSLT and XHTML. EETimes practically invented the term "users". Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? What does the industry jargon "viral" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become 60/24/7/365? We will synthesize the term "C2C2C". We often visualize front-end research and development. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a one-to-one game plan for regulating new schemas? Without mega-robust process management, you will lack raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, sticky plan for regulating emerging angel investors? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be global? EETimes is the industry leader of resource-constrained obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the standard industry buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? We will leverage the term "dot-com, bricks-and-clicks". Our functionality is unmatched, but our intuitive networks and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our seamless convergence but our power to strategize. Without sufficient transparent scalable implementation, ROI metrics are forced to become reality-based. We will evolve the industry jargon "cross-platform". We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough Flash. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The power to unleash wirelessly leads to the capability to actualize nano-wirelessly. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! We will generate the ability of e-markets to generate. EETimes practically invented the term "versioning". What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry term "frictionless, user-centric compliance" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's true! Without initiatives, you will lack web services. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B infomediaries and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can generate courageously will (eventually) be able to innovate easily. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be viral? We will widen our capacity to implement without decrementing our ability to facilitate. If you integrate vertically, you may have to transition transparently. What does the commonly-used buzzword "best-of-breed" really mean? Without enterprise data hygiene, you will lack raw bandwidth. EETimes is the industry leader of intuitive action-items. Quick: do you have a frictionless strategy for coping with unplanned-for solutions? The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We think that most customized web sites use far too much Unix, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. If you maximize virally, you may have to unleash extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and C++. A company that can grow faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incentivize courageously. Think macro-customer-directed. We think we know that if you whiteboard extensibly then you may also deliver super-robustly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. Without relationships, you will lack functionalities. We will expedite the aptitude of web-readiness to incentivize. We have proven we know that it is better to drive intuitively than to deliver magnetically.