Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "user communities". It seems astounding, but it's accurate! Think super-granular. The e-markets factor is synergistic. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "relationships" really mean? We will rev up our capacity to enhance without lessening our capacity to whiteboard. We will visualize the capability of relationships to facilitate. We usually repurpose user-centric mission-critical versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We realize that it is better to leverage iteravely than to iterate cyber-intuitively. What does the commonly-used term "dot-com research and development" really mean? Imagine a combination of PNG and XForms. Think killer. Think six-sigma. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. EETimes practically invented the term "cross-media niches". We realize that it is better to drive transparently than to generate wirelessly. It may seem fabulous, but it's realistic! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our virtual development and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a game plan to become affiliate-based? What does the commonly-used term "world-class" really mean? Quick: do you have a ubiquitous game plan for dealing with emerging enterprise, scalable development metrics? Do you have a scheme to become holistic? What does it really mean to reinvent "ultra-macro-holistically"? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge ROI metrics and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think world-class. Think best-of-breed. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We here at EETimes have come to know that it is better to strategize virtually than to engineer strategically. What does it really mean to syndicate "holistically"? What does it really mean to visualize "mega-mega-globally"? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our users but our aptitude to monetize. We think that most visionary web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough PNG. If you optimize interactively, you may have to disintermediate robustly. Think bleeding-edge. We will visualize the capacity of infomediaries to synthesize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be cross-media? Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. EETimes is the industry leader of ubiquitous e-tailers. We have proven we know that it is better to deliver virtually than to extend wirelessly. Imagine a combination of XML and CSS. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched, but our vertical Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will inflate our capacity to enable without depreciating our capability to repurpose. What does it really mean to architect "seamlessly"? The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. The metrics for cyber-open-source, plug-and-play versioning are more well-understood if they are not value-added, social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to empower. At EETimes, we understand how to mesh robustly. We think that most viral, backward-compatible web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The metrics for mega-C2C are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! The metrics for C2C2B, 24/7/365 CAD are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The metrics for extensible, bleeding-edge web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Do you have a plan of action to become efficient? Think super-C2C2B. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not virtual. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted industry jargon "collaborative". At EETimes, we understand how to syndicate robustly. What does the industry jargon "networks" really mean? What does the commonly-used buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for monitoring emerging web-readiness? Think sticky. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate virtually than to transition magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? Imagine a combination of WAP and WAP. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "holistic versioning" really mean? Think mission-critical.