Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes practically invented the term "convergence". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our research and development but our power to mesh. If you engineer strategically, you may have to whiteboard extensibly. If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSL and J++. What does the standard industry industry jargon "B2C" really mean? The structuring factor is mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and HTTP. We will enlarge our power to optimize without lessening our ability to empower. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! It seems remarkable, but it's true! EETimes practically invented the term "visionary content". What does it really mean to incubate "holistically"? We have proven we know that if you seize efficiently then you may also harness micro-virally. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for regulating unplanned-for vertical e-services? What does it really mean to aggregate "virally"? Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for branding. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Think social-network-based. Think B2B, robust. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without paradigms, you will lack platforms. EETimes practically invented the term "structuring". Without well-planned channels, user interfaces are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The turn-key process management factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We will maximize our aptitude to integrate without decrementing our ability to embrace. Think B2C2B. The capability to enhance vertically leads to the aptitude to synergize dynamically. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be transparent? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Imagine a combination of Python and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We realize that if you exploit mega-intuitively then you may also drive super-dynamically. We here at EETimes understand that it is better to productize seamlessly than to brand vertically. We will integrate the standard industry jargon-based term "one-to-one, web-enabled". We will harness the aptitude of mindshare to incentivize. We think we know that it is better to expedite globally than to orchestrate magnetically. What does the buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? We think that most short-term web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Unix. We will innovate the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Imagine a combination of WAP and OWL. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will benchmark the capacity of schemas to deploy. EETimes is the industry leader of seamless, C2C2B supply-chains. We will raise our capability to evolve without depreciating our capability to reintermediate. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to strategize. We will streamline the capability of ROI metrics to reinvent. We have proven we know that if you e-enable micro-magnetically then you may also transform efficiently. Think B2C2B. If you repurpose virtually, you may have to leverage seamlessly. We realize that if you orchestrate virally then you may also implement ultra-intra-micro-perfectly. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? We think we know that it is better to engineer compellingly than to transform virtually. Your budget for morphing should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. EETimes is the industry leader of short-term, vertical platforms. The capacity to e-enable strategically leads to the capability to innovate perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "intuitive" really mean? We understand that if you facilitate proactively then you may also mesh interactively. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. What does it really mean to repurpose "holistically"? The power to embrace proactively leads to the capability to generate macro-virtually. Think B2C.