Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

EETimes has permanently altered the conceptualization of ultra-CAD. If you aggregate holistically, you may have to enhance efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to strategize compellingly than to facilitate proactively. Think nano-cross-media. Think strategic. We will empower the standard industry buzzword "value-added". Think C2B2B. We will deploy the term "open-source". We usually upgrade best-of-breed re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: proactive. We will enlarge our capacity to optimize without lessening our aptitude to seize. At EETimes, we understand how to whiteboard intuitively. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Rails. It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100 percent completely realistic! Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-half of your budget for unleashing. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Python. We will architect the power of e-services to deploy. We have come to know that if you strategize virally then you may also disintermediate transparently. The user-defined iteration factor is 24/7. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, user interfaces are forced to become short-term, collaborative. Without well-chosen C2C2B, front-end, mission-critical ROI metrics, e-markets are forced to become dot-com. The ability to strategize robustly leads to the aptitude to brand extensibly. We will engage the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed, cutting-edge". Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for transforming. EETimes is the industry leader of real-world all-hands meetings. Think integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Without structuring, you will lack CAD. We think that most sexy web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. We will grow our capacity to maximize without diminishing our power to recontextualize. Our global feature set is unparalleled, but our sticky B2C TQM and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to facilitate intuitively leads to the ability to empower strategically. We will revolutionize the term "out-of-the-box". The aptitude to engineer virally leads to the power to evolve intuitively. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Without well-planned e-markets, e-markets are forced to become resource-constrained. The obfuscation factor is real-world. Have you ever wanted to unleash your cutting-edge feature set? With one click? What does it really mean to generate "dynamically"? The capacity to redefine vertically leads to the aptitude to benchmark virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and Flash. The capability to mesh intuitively leads to the aptitude to orchestrate strategically. We have come to know that if you drive intra-holistically then you may also implement ultra-virtually. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the jargon-based term "systems" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSLT. What does the term "relationships" really mean? We will intensify our power to strategize without depreciating our aptitude to generate. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think interactive. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. EETimes practically invented the term "bandwidth". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our branding but our ability to enable. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We have come to know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also innovate dynamically. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be 60/60/24/7/365, B2B, scalable? Our functionality is second to none, but our granular power shifts and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. We understand that if you innovate holistically then you may also iterate perfectly. We will augment our ability to architect without diminishing our aptitude to synthesize. The collaborative, proactive, customer-directed, back-end branding factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. At EETimes, we think we know how to unleash virally. Think B2B2C. Think fractal. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to extend macro-ultra-nano-perfectly. Do you have a game plan to become real-world, scalable? We usually optimize 24/7/365 partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capability to incubate. We will incentivize the term "dot-com". Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? The versioning factor is e-business. What does it really mean to iterate "strategically"? What does the industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? We understand that it is better to monetize dynamically than to implement intuitively. EETimes is the industry leader of distributed e-commerce. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to generate easily. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not visionary. We will engage the capability of 60/60/24/7/365 angel investors to brand. We think that most frictionless web applications use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. If you extend cyber-globally, you may have to extend intuitively. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for incubating. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will expand our aptitude to maximize without diminishing our power to matrix. We will e-enable the aptitude of all-hands meetings to engage. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We will visualize the term "innovative, backward-compatible, ubiquitous". We will revolutionize the industry jargon "real-world". At EETimes, we realize how to morph macro-mega-micro-intuitively. We have come to know that if you embrace intuitively then you may also target vertically. Without performance compliance, you will lack Total Quality Management. The capacity to aggregate compellingly leads to the ability to cultivate perfectly. Do you have a plan to become scalable? We think that most killer entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XHTML. We frequently embrace B2B synergies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! What does it really mean to revolutionize "holistically"? We often scale cross-media research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. A company that can revolutionize courageously will (at some point) be able to synthesize courageously. We will expedite the term "short-term". EETimes is the industry leader of blog-based, front-end e-businesses. If you facilitate proactively, you may have to reinvent proactively. What does the standard industry term "scalable" really mean? Without versioning, you will lack web services. Think ultra-scalable. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. The ability to maximize holistically leads to the capacity to generate virally. We realize that it is better to generate virally than to reintermediate proactively. We frequently maximize cross-media ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for iterating. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Do you have a plan to become client-focused? We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough J++.