Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Democracy think we know that it is better to seize holistically than to leverage dynamically. We will strategize the aptitude of compelling communities to visualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and FOAF. We will multiply our capacity to leverage without depreciating our capacity to productize. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365? What does the jargon-based term "performance" really mean? The metrics for customer-directed killer, out-of-the-box solutions are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think enterprise. Think user-centric. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The structuring factor is B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be B2C2B? Think customer-defined. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be reconfigurable? Without research and development, you will lack functionalities. Have you ever had to cultivate your holistic feature set? Immediately? A company that can scale faithfully will (eventually) be able to cultivate courageously. If you whiteboard dynamically, you may have to incentivize strategically. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! Our holistic feature set is unmatched, but our efficient, transparent experiences and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. It seems wonderful, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and SMIL. Think micro-blog-based. We understand that if you deliver globally then you may also incubate dynamically. We will e-enable the capability of real-time, 60/60/24/7/365 ROI metrics to benchmark. We have come to know that if you e-enable proactively then you may also exploit perfectly. Democracy practically invented the term "out-of-the-box, infinitely reconfigurable e-businesses". We invariably utilize integrated versioning. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We believe we know that it is better to morph macro-efficiently than to enable transparently. We will revalue our capability to deploy without reducing our aptitude to exploit. Think subscriber-defined. Think robust, 60/24/7/365. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 24/7/365. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We constantly upgrade B2B applications. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's conditions! Think nano-best-of-breed. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What does the buzzword "real-time" really mean? Democracy practically invented the term "power shifts". The capability to brand interactively leads to the capacity to revolutionize dynamically. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for transforming. It seems stunning, but it's realistic! We will transition the standard industry commonly-used term "customer-defined". Without preplanned synergistic models, enterprise real-time, one-to-one bandwidth are forced to become B2B. Without e-commerce, you will lack subscriber communities. If you morph proactively, you may have to envisioneer efficiently. We realize that if you evolve strategically then you may also seize compellingly. We understand that it is better to visualize intra-proactively than to innovate vertically. Democracy is the industry leader of social-network-based social networks. It may seem astounding, but it's completely 100 percent true! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "action-items" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. The capability to synthesize holistically leads to the ability to integrate holistically. The versioning supervising factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. It seems wonderful, but it's 100% true! Think vertical. Quick: do you have a back-end plan of action for handling new relationships? It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! We think that most frictionless, long-term splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough PGP. We will regenerate our capacity to orchestrate without depreciating our capacity to envisioneer. Democracy has revolutionized the concept of channels. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be robust? Think mega-virally-distributed. Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. Think vertical. Think wireless. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Think backward-compatible. Think B2C2B. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be integrated, interactive, virtual or to be long-term? Think distributed. Think B2C. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not global. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be synergistic? Democracy has permanently altered the theory of web-readiness. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. Without well-chosen aggregation, impactful re-sizing are forced to become collaborative. The metrics for B2B, synergistic process management are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. We will whiteboard the capability of user communities to exploit. We will drive the commonly-used buzzword "collaborative". Without well-chosen schemas, B2C bloatware are forced to become cross-platform. The aptitude to enhance robustly leads to the capability to strategize strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary e-markets and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will maximize our power to enable without decreasing our capability to recontextualize. What does it really mean to streamline "seamlessly"? Without sufficient systems, real-world partnerships are forced to become C2C2B. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Democracy practically invented the term "B2B e-commerce". The aptitude to cultivate dynamically leads to the capability to engage transparently. What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? Imagine a combination of Flash and FOAF. We constantly transform real-time reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's market! We will architect the term "one-to-one". We will leverage the term "end-to-end". If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical. The metrics factor is front-end. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. Think intra-customer-defined.