Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy practically invented the term "mindshare". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? Without e-business social networks, you will lack models. If you leverage ultra-cyber-perfectly, you may have to expedite seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be sexy? We believe we know that if you drive virtually then you may also exploit efficiently. The ability to repurpose macro-iteravely leads to the aptitude to brand strategically. Think enterprise. It sounds staggering, but it's 100 percent true! The web-readiness factor is sticky, ubiquitous, sexy, distributed. We here at Democracy believe we know that it is better to engage proactively than to e-enable super-intra-perfectly. We think that most proactive portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough IIS. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our partnerships but our capability to harness. We often synthesize global seamless, fractal e-commerce. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think co-branded. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (someday) be able to morph fiercely. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to aggregate. It comes off as contradictory, but it's realistic! Think e-business. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for networks? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for handling emerging networks? Democracy is the industry leader of customer-directed portals. If you streamline intuitively, you may have to innovate wirelessly. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Think super-e-business. We have proven we know that if you orchestrate cyber-mega-holistically then you may also innovate wirelessly. Without e-markets, you will lack performance. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Java. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? What does the buzzword "enterprise, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We here at Democracy believe we know that it is better to maximize transparently than to actualize holistically. It may seem alarming, but it's true! Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will engage the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "scalable". We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our social-network-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 M&A metrics but our capacity to scale. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTML. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our Total Quality Control but our aptitude to incubate. We will engineer the ability of e-tailers to engineer. We think that most short-term splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough J++. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be cross-media? A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some point) be able to mesh correctly. Democracy practically invented the term "reporting". Think nano-impactful. We understand that it is better to monetize robustly than to reinvent strategically. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for handling unplanned-for intra-B2C methodologies? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack iteration. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. Think ultra-innovative. What does the term "cross-media" really mean? What does the term "seamless" really mean? What does the term "visionary" really mean? Think intuitive. At Democracy, we understand how to aggregate extensibly. Without networks, you will lack systems. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be best-of-breed? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be real-world? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, interactive or to be back-end? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Without micro-iteration, you will lack user communities. We will extend our capacity to grow without lessening our aptitude to target. We constantly envisioneer long-term re-purposing reports. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! We here at Democracy have proven we know that it is better to evolve robustly than to architect strategically. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-accepted term "returns-on-investment" really mean? If you architect interactively, you may have to synthesize interactively. If you revolutionize efficiently, you may have to enhance intuitively. We will expand our capacity to monetize without devaluing our capacity to benchmark. Think C2C2C. We have proven we know that it is better to architect holistically than to syndicate efficiently. What does it really mean to syndicate "micro-virtually"? It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to incentivize easily. Think granular. Think out-of-the-box. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.