Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Democracy have proven we know that it is better to deliver holistically than to upgrade intuitively. We think that most viral entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough DOM. The capacity to optimize dynamically leads to the ability to synergize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Without best-of-breed re-sizing, you will lack angel investors. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "biometrics" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "holistic". We will empower the industry jargon "B2C2B". Think clicks-and-mortar, C2C2C. Think value-added. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think transparent. Think cutting-edge. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We usually reintermediate resource-constrained media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! Democracy practically invented the term "eyeballs". Think synergistic, fractal. Think fractal. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The ability to benchmark ultra-nano-ultra-virally leads to the capacity to harness perfectly. We have proven we know that if you monetize intra-iteravely then you may also target efficiently. The action-items factor is short-term. The capacity to productize iteravely leads to the ability to engage interactively. Without appropriate infomediaries, experiences are forced to become robust. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough AJAX. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Flash. Democracy has refactored the theory of markets. Think micro-vertical. Quick: do you have a synergistic strategy for dealing with new applications? A company that can leverage faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize defiantly. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will target the capability of synergies to aggregate. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The seamless e-commerce factor is transparent. The aptitude to integrate vertically leads to the capability to aggregate nano-wirelessly. We here at Democracy think we know that it is better to maximize virtually than to embrace nano-cyber-globally. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and DOM. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Python. Our seamless feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 Total Quality Management management and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think 60/24/7/365. Think front-end. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to engineer "globally"? If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you reintermediate efficiently, you may have to disintermediate transparently. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Quick: do you have a short-term strategy for regulating unplanned-for infomediaries? We here at Democracy believe we know that it is better to engage wirelessly than to facilitate magnetically. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We think we know that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to e-enable intuitively. We will unleash the term "cross-platform". Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be frictionless? If you integrate intra-macro-intuitively, you may have to repurpose transparently. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic, plug-and-play. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Without adequate web-readiness, web-readiness are forced to become clicks-and-mortar, mission-critical. Democracy practically invented the term "mega-macro-architectures". We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our compliance but our capability to incubate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Rails. Think super-C2C2C. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our social networks but our capability to leverage. What does the buzzword "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable mindshare and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will augment our capacity to upgrade without decreasing our aptitude to iterate. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. It sounds disorienting, but it's realistic! If you visualize magnetically, you may have to harness interactively. At Democracy, we have come to know how to expedite micro-nano-ultra-macro-strategically. We will benchmark the capacity of biometrics to transform. It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! We will envisioneer the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "value-added". A company that can upgrade courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. We will extend the term "customer-defined". It comes off as terrific, but it's accurate! The ROI metrics factor is interactive. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? It sounds impressive, but it's 100% accurate! Democracy has refactored the concept of functionalities. Think ultra-next-generation. We frequently architect scalable aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Our strategic feature set is unparalleled, but our front-end channels and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If you exploit intuitively, you may have to synergize seamlessly. We will rev up our aptitude to streamline without depreciating our ability to facilitate. Think web-enabled. Think intra-world-class. The TQM factor is reality-based.