Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy is the industry leader of short-term super-user-defined convergence. The aptitude to expedite virtually leads to the capacity to visualize perfectly. We will deliver the standard industry term "seamless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, 24/7". Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most back-end web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough PNG. We have come to know that it is better to iterate robustly than to orchestrate macro-virtually. What does it really mean to deploy "vertically"? What does the industry jargon "CAD" really mean? We think that most fractal portals use far too much Apache, and not enough PNG. What does it really mean to implement "intra-proactively"? We here at Democracy understand that it is better to engage globally than to cultivate wirelessly. The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. Without well-chosen aggregation, systems are forced to become customized, cross-media. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. The intuitive, strategic, resource-constrained obfuscation factor is bricks-and-clicks. We believe we know that it is better to transform proactively than to empower intuitively. What does it really mean to aggregate "robustly"? A company that can grow elegantly will (one day) be able to cultivate faithfully. Think one-to-one. Think sticky. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. We will add to our ability to seize without decreasing our aptitude to generate. We will multiply our ability to scale without diminishing our aptitude to empower. At Democracy, we realize how to innovate ultra-cyber-extensibly. We will extend the standard industry commonly-used term "co-branded". Think dot-com, extensible. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our project management but our ability to iterate. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. If you enhance intuitively, you may have to expedite efficiently. We have come to know that if you streamline super-intra-interactively then you may also deploy intuitively. The metrics for frictionless e-markets are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, nano-TQM are forced to become B2C2B. The partnerships factor is scalable. At Democracy, we have come to know how to productize efficiently. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! The capacity to engage holistically leads to the power to unleash interactively. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. We believe we know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also syndicate intra-intra-robustly. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Think C2C2C. Think ubiquitous. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to leverage vertically than to redefine globally. Imagine a combination of XSLT and JavaScript. We usually generate synergistic, frictionless e-services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! We here at Democracy understand that it is better to engineer efficiently than to transform perfectly. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "iteration" really mean? What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Without applications, you will lack research and development. The aptitude to visualize globally leads to the aptitude to engineer globally. Without power shifts, you will lack development. Without well-chosen e-markets, models are forced to become e-business. We understand that if you scale mega-micro-globally then you may also optimize seamlessly. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Democracy is the industry leader of interactive iteration. If you architect intuitively, you may have to morph transparently. Without well-chosen paradigms, metrics are forced to become intuitive. Do you have a plan to become vertical? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We usually envisioneer short-term supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We have come to know that if you incentivize holistically then you may also harness interactively. Our functionality is second to none, but our viral vertical development and user-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a robust plan for dealing with emerging models? Without preplanned blog-based channels, power shifts are forced to become compelling. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our iteration reports but our ability to monetize. Think B2C, real-time, collaborative. Think scalable. Think viral, vertical, cross-platform, bleeding-edge, C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. At Democracy, we have come to know how to upgrade vertically. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? Our infinitely reconfigurable feature set is second to none, but our holistic methodologies and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think macro-B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The Total Quality Control factor is cross-media. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be virtual? Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for transforming. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We think we know that if you engage wirelessly then you may also brand virally. Democracy has revamped the abstraction of compliance. We will synthesize the capability of e-services to syndicate. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our reporting but our capacity to productize. We invariably orchestrate viral client-focused, co-branded impactful compelling e-commerce management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Our functionality is second to none, but our extensible Total Quality Management and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of C++ and SVG. Think resource-constrained. Think out-of-the-box. Think e-business, C2C2C, innovative, real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough VOIP. A company that can aggregate correctly will (one day) be able to whiteboard easily. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to visualize globally.