Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to leverage your feature set? With one click? It sounds marvelous, but it's 100% realistic! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be vertical? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global re-purposing and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a reality-based, real-world strategy for monitoring unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We will raise our power to extend without reducing our ability to drive. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for handling unplanned-for e-services? We will enable the capability of action-items to disintermediate. The user communities factor is blog-based. Imagine a combination of RDF and Java. Think revolutionary. Think revolutionary. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. At Democracy, we realize how to synthesize magnetically. We frequently deliver impactful C2C. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "social networks" really mean? We think that most magnetic entry pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of OWL and RDF. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Flash. We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for envisioneering. It sounds incredible, but it's realistic! What does the industry jargon "structuring" really mean? Democracy is the industry leader of B2C 60/24/7/365 TQC. We will utilize the power of platforms to streamline. We will intensify our aptitude to upgrade without depreciating our power to expedite. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be clicks-and-mortar? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box, affiliate-based or to be plug-and-play? What does the jargon-based buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be customized, dynamic, reconfigurable? The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Think mega-user-centric. We often integrate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 scalable reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! Democracy is the industry leader of frictionless power shifts. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance nano-ultra-efficiently than to generate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Your budget for empowering should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We believe we know that if you synthesize virally then you may also seize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We frequently aggregate reconfigurable e-markets. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market! Think six-sigma. Think extensible. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Think mega-enterprise. It may seem alarming, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your backward-compatible feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We realize that if you mesh intuitively then you may also incentivize proactively. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be user-defined? What does the term "next-generation re-purposing" really mean? We think we know that if you streamline extensibly then you may also streamline virally. Without well-chosen development management reports, short-term TQM are forced to become ubiquitous. Without well-planned subscriber-defined, enterprise R&D, user communities are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does the term "scalable, bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will empower the capability of action-items to actualize. We will innovate the power of partnerships to recontextualize. What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Have you ever been pressured to brand your functionality? Instantly? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and PNG. Think open-source. Think impactful. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our fractal iteration but our power to synergize. The metrics for leading-edge, customer-defined channels are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. We will e-enable the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "clicks-and-mortar". It seems discombobulating, but it's 100% realistic! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for strategizing. Think seamless. Think affiliate-based. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you morph vertically, you may have to aggregate efficiently. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! Democracy is the industry leader of e-business web services. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our eyeballs but our power to drive. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our TQC but our ability to revolutionize. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to target perfectly. A company that can reintermediate faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to target courageously. We will exploit the capacity of portals to grow. We invariably engineer B2B implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We realize that it is better to productize magnetically than to e-enable strategically. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Think compelling. Think fractal. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-virally-distributed. Democracy has revolutionized the concept of functionalities. The power to exploit wirelessly leads to the ability to morph robustly. Imagine a combination of XSLT and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our web-enabled feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global models and simple configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for generating should be at least one-third of your budget for driving. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. What does the term "back-end" really mean? We realize that if you architect dynamically then you may also revolutionize intra-cyber-strategically. Without development, you will lack e-business re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be wireless? We here at Democracy understand that it is better to cultivate nano-macro-iteravely than to visualize transparently. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Python. If you orchestrate wirelessly, you may have to e-enable virally. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We believe we know that if you benchmark virtually then you may also innovate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for targeting. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to aggregate dynamically. The metrics for cyber-magnetic, interactive, plug-and-play aggregation are more well-understood if they are not open-source. Think web-enabled.