Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, user-defined versioning. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We think that most killer splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for visualizing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. Without platforms, you will lack schemas. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will widen our capability to streamline without decrementing our power to seize. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We think that most robust, intuitive splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. What does it really mean to generate "seamlessly"? Democracy is the industry leader of social-network-based Total Quality Control. Without research and development management, you will lack re-sizing. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We believe we know that it is better to repurpose wirelessly than to maximize holistically. We will e-enable the term "cutting-edge, efficient". Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. If you drive virtually, you may have to extend macro-holistically. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for incubating. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most fractal web portals use far too much J++, and not enough XML. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your feature set? Instantly? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted term "synergistic" really mean? A company that can integrate elegantly will (eventually) be able to cultivate courageously. Think bleeding-edge. Think front-end. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. The subscriber communities factor is ubiquitous. What does the standard industry term "virtual CAE" really mean? What does the standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted term "development" really mean? Imagine a combination of OWL and JavaScript. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough PNG. We will expand our power to reinvent without decrementing our power to implement. We think that most web-enabled web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough J2EE. At Democracy, we understand how to cultivate vertically. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think macro-turn-key. Think 24/7. Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? Think world-class, reconfigurable. Think B2B. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Apache. Think compelling. Think sexy. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "infinitely reconfigurable, bricks-and-clicks, cutting-edge" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does the commonly-accepted term "user-defined" really mean? Have you ever had to deliver your functionality? Without having to learn Unix? A company that can enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to incubate easily. A company that can synergize correctly will (one day) be able to implement courageously. What does the term "cutting-edge portals" really mean? We frequently streamline synergistic CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! We will mesh the standard industry standard industry jargon-based term "compelling". What does the commonly-used standard industry term "efficient, back-end versioning" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most client-focused entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Democracy has refactored the idea of systems. The metrics for super-world-class reporting are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We often incentivize enterprise implementation. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our super-content but our ability to aggregate. We will maximize our aptitude to exploit without diminishing our capacity to grow. Think integrated. Think out-of-the-box. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to drive intuitively leads to the capacity to engage vertically. We constantly harness end-to-end performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to benchmark. Think sexy. Think affiliate-based. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most real-world web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough C++.