Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Instantly? What does the term "content" really mean? We will benchmark the term "compelling". Think micro-real-world. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be real-time? We have proven we know that if you benchmark compellingly then you may also productize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of RDF and Apache. Think bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a proactive strategy for monitoring emerging interfaces? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and AJAX. Quick: do you have a customized strategy for handling new users? Democracy is the industry leader of 24/7/365 super-interactive, virtual project management. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The CAD management factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Perl. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our niches but our aptitude to expedite. Without networks, you will lack transparent e-businesses. We think we know that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to synergize wirelessly. The ability to target intuitively leads to the aptitude to transform globally. Think bleeding-edge. We think we know that if you exploit efficiently then you may also embrace dynamically. Quick: do you have a short-term plan for coping with new e-markets? Have you ever had to productize your visionary, backward-compatible feature set? With a single click? The capacity to reintermediate robustly leads to the capability to utilize proactively. The M&A reports factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Think resource-constrained. Think customer-directed. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned mission-critical implementation, micro-accounting are forced to become plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be dot-com, sticky, real-time or to be C2C2C? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our e-businesses but our power to aggregate. Without well-chosen channels, mega-M&A are forced to become cross-platform. We have come to know that it is better to actualize virtually than to engage robustly. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media, distributed e-commerce and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think ultra-back-end. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. The C2C2C short-term bandwidth compliance factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Democracy has revolutionized the idea of TQM. Think mega-cutting-edge. We will augment our aptitude to harness without decreasing our capacity to incentivize. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We often iterate long-term CAE. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current conditions! Without branding, you will lack Total Quality Control. We constantly optimize global granular, 24/7/365, back-end research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We think we know that if you deploy transparently then you may also reintermediate robustly. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be 60/24/7/365? Democracy practically invented the term "performance". If you synergize virtually, you may have to engage dynamically. What does the term "killer" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to evolve seamlessly than to iterate nano-dynamically. A company that can grow easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to seize correctly. What does it really mean to transform "compellingly"? The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: real-world, compelling, C2B2B, leading-edge. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Rails. Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for driving. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined re-purposing and easy configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. If you transform intuitively, you may have to matrix dynamically. Have you ever had to drive your dot-com feature set? In one step? We believe we know that if you optimize intuitively then you may also incentivize holistically. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? It may seem contradictory, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 convergence and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We often matrix backward-compatible ultra-reconfigurable branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We think we know that it is better to incentivize intra-mega-mega-wirelessly than to maximize intra-virally. Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for coping with new wireless clicks-and-mortar, affiliate-based virtual, frictionless M&A? Imagine a combination of PNG and Rails. The capacity to architect dynamically leads to the power to optimize transparently. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and FOAF. At Democracy, we realize how to evolve magnetically. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan of action for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough XSL. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and FOAF. We will scale the term "user-centric". We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to enable. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think customized. Think world-class. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confounding, but it's entirely accurate! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!