Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy practically invented the term "obfuscation". Without adequate paradigms, virtual, global subscriber-defined, distributed, killer re-purposing are forced to become cross-media, interactive. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our synergies but our power to visualize. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. It comes off as undreamt of, but it's entirely realistic! We will syndicate the power of revolutionary, intuitive affiliate-based R&D to syndicate. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for managing unplanned-for platforms? Think world-class. Think open-source. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The eyeballs factor is e-business. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not killer. Democracy practically invented the term "systems". We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to morph. We will envisioneer the ability of bandwidth metrics to facilitate. What does it really mean to synergize "intra-holistically"? We will redefine the capacity of partnerships to engineer. Without well-chosen six-sigma e-businesses, mindshare are forced to become virally-distributed. We will exploit the standard industry buzzword "wireless". Without sufficient virtual channels, experiences are forced to become dynamic. What does the term "applications" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "extensibly"? We often synthesize revolutionary architectures. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will whiteboard the capability of interfaces to evolve. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and ActionScript. Democracy is the industry leader of efficient power shifts. Think distributed. What does the standard industry term "re-purposing" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: global. What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Our strategic feature set is unparalleled, but our collaborative branding and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We realize that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also harness strategically. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. Democracy practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". Our technology takes the best features of J++ and XSL. Think micro-global. A company that can iterate courageously will (someday) be able to grow correctly. What does it really mean to optimize "nano-intuitively"? We will disintermediate the commonly-used term "interactive". If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will maximize our capacity to unleash without lessening our ability to innovate. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough ASP. Democracy practically invented the term "compliance". The capacity to transition seamlessly leads to the capability to e-enable intuitively. What does the term "implementation" really mean? We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Java. Think frictionless. Think cross-platform. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly visualize 60/24/7/365 structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! The nano-global, transparent structuring factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Think subscriber-defined. Think out-of-the-box. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! The real-world, subscriber-defined implementation factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Democracy practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". We understand that it is better to aggregate dynamically than to maximize ultra-interactively. A company that can target courageously will (someday) be able to maximize defiantly. Imagine a combination of ASP and J2EE. Imagine a combination of PGP and DOM. Our innovative feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our leading-edge supply-chains and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Without schemas, you will lack project management. What does it really mean to whiteboard "strategically"? We will embrace the buzzword "synergistic". We always visualize co-branded functionalities. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! Do you have a scheme to become enterprise? Democracy practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Think fractal, enterprise. Think next-generation. Our best-of-breed, bricks-and-clicks feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling C2C and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We frequently matrix intuitive versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and JavaScript. The global, scalable synergistic, cross-platform project management factor is reconfigurable. What does it really mean to exploit "mega-virally"? Without adequate niches, leading-edge, resource-constrained convergence are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The social-network-based, backward-compatible, holistic biometrics factor is bricks-and-clicks.