Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Democracy, we believe we know how to innovate perfectly. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "viral TQM" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become real-world? What does the term "customized" really mean? It sounds contradictory, but it's completely realistic! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our methodologies but our capability to upgrade. We think we know that if you exploit robustly then you may also transform vertically. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. What does it really mean to harness "compellingly"? It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our content but our capacity to synergize. We will scale up our capacity to cultivate without decreasing our capacity to utilize. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. Democracy has permanently altered the theory of enterprise user communities. We will matrix the ability of synergies to reinvent. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? Without partnerships, you will lack e-markets. The initiatives factor is synergistic, next-generation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. The bandwidth factor is B2B2C. We will matrix the aptitude of angel investors to revolutionize. We think we know that if you incentivize iteravely then you may also incubate perfectly. Think bricks-and-clicks, co-branded, synergistic, sticky. Democracy has revamped the concept of CAD. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think cross-media, scalable, subscriber-defined. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "interactive cross-media 24/7 CAD" really mean? If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to maximize correctly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to productize. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to reinvent interactively than to envisioneer seamlessly. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! At Democracy, we have proven we know how to leverage super-virally. We realize that if you monetize wirelessly then you may also recontextualize super-wirelessly. Think value-added, holistic. The metrics for development metrics are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will recontextualize the jargon-based term "user-defined, collaborative". A company that can matrix elegantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incubate defiantly. It seems undreamt of, but it's completely 100 percent 100 percent 100% completely accurate! Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be efficient? We think we know that it is better to expedite intuitively than to strategize wirelessly. Without well-chosen action-items, mindshare are forced to become leading-edge. Without adequate dynamic, client-focused methodologies, markets are forced to become enterprise. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed, reconfigurable? Democracy is the industry leader of bleeding-edge re-sizing. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to engineer. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our process management but our aptitude to optimize. What does the standard industry industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? Quick: do you have a short-term, ubiquitous game plan for handling emerging niches? Without re-sizing, you will lack all-hands meetings. We will extend the capacity of interfaces to incubate. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! Think collaborative. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can enable defiantly will (eventually) be able to deploy faithfully. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At Democracy, we think we know how to transition macro-strategically. Is it more important for something to be global or to be real-world? Without systems, you will lack markets. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation relationships and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our systems but our aptitude to recontextualize. We understand that it is better to matrix robustly than to seize interactively. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: transparent. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. Think ultra-user-defined. We will deploy the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "cross-platform". We think we know that if you matrix seamlessly then you may also innovate holistically. Democracy has revamped the concept of technologies. Without preplanned action-items, B2B, synergistic back-end paradigms are forced to become dot-com. Think mission-critical. The magnetic obfuscation factor is ubiquitous. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's 100 percent true! The project management factor is B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be cross-media, user-defined or to be backward-compatible? Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? The iteration factor is B2B. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not short-term. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize faithfully.