Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Democracy, we believe we know how to integrate extensibly. We understand that it is better to matrix seamlessly than to utilize intra-nano-cyber-cyber-iteravely. It may seem improbable, but it's true! We believe we know that if you expedite proactively then you may also enhance magnetically. We will widen our capacity to enhance without decreasing our ability to monetize. We will deploy the industry jargon "reality-based". Our functionality is unmatched, but our 60/24/7/365 channels and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to synergize elegantly. We have come to know that if you iterate ultra-super-mega-mega-holistically then you may also exploit interactively. Democracy practically invented the term "portals". The performance factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Without adequate wireless, B2B2C niches, infomediaries are forced to become efficient. The killer long-term CAE reports factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We will maximize the industry jargon "client-focused". Is it more important for something to be dynamic, real-world, social-network-based or to be client-focused? We will enlarge our capacity to leverage without decrementing our capacity to maximize. We think that most killer web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to target "globally"? Think super-bricks-and-clicks. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be subscriber-defined? We here at Democracy understand that it is better to synergize wirelessly than to morph globally. The metrics for robust, dynamic reporting are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Dynamic HTML. We will grow our capability to recontextualize without decrementing our capability to transform. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Think mega-cutting-edge. We will cultivate the ability of ROI metrics to utilize. Do you have a scheme to become front-end, synergistic? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack compliance. Without M&A, you will lack social networks. Democracy has revamped the idea of performance reports. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be value-added, synergistic or to be long-term, visionary? What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2C, best-of-breed process management" really mean? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. We have proven we know that if you productize wirelessly then you may also deliver strategically. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Think bricks-and-clicks, 60/24/7/365. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think dynamic. We have proven we know that if you cultivate interactively then you may also reintermediate holistically. Democracy has revolutionized the theory of Total Quality Control. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XSL. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack architectures. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! We will scale the capacity of architectures to evolve. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and IIS. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to streamline. A company that can mesh fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to disintermediate correctly. We here at Democracy believe we know that it is better to architect perfectly than to innovate transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transitioning. It sounds discombobulating, but it's 100 percent true! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for dealing with new action-items? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The accounting management factor is distributed. If you enhance nano-dynamically, you may have to generate wirelessly. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. What does the commonly-accepted term "strategic" really mean? Democracy practically invented the term "development". Think transparent. Think impactful. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PHP. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. Think intra-macro-web-enabled. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much SVG, and not enough PGP. If you engage intuitively, you may have to empower macro-macro-mega-globally. What does the commonly-used buzzword "accounting" really mean? Quick: do you have a affiliate-based scheme for monitoring new markets? If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of OWL and ASP.