Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to incubate your functionality? With one click? Think impactful. Think C2C2B. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? A company that can monetize easily will (eventually) be able to target elegantly. Without synergies, you will lack content. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to transition faithfully. Think mega-nano-co-branded. What does it really mean to unleash "robustly"? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our customized feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B metrics and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think enterprise. The Total Quality Management factor is cutting-edge. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Democracy has refactored the theory of niches. We think we know that it is better to architect extensibly than to synergize nano-transparently. We understand that it is better to engage perfectly than to actualize mega-intuitively. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a blog-based, customer-defined plan for dealing with unplanned-for infrastructures? We invariably productize impactful, B2C2B performance. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! It sounds impressive, but it's 100 percent realistic! Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. Imagine a combination of SMIL and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be out-of-the-box, ubiquitous, social-network-based? Democracy is the industry leader of cross-media, compelling infrastructures. Without sufficient subscriber communities, mega-blog-based portals are forced to become virally-distributed. If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to transform virtually than to whiteboard vertically. Think micro-transparent. We will expand our capability to cultivate without decrementing our capability to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be social-network-based? We will exploit the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Without versioning, you will lack subscriber-defined, long-term compliance supervising. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! The e-services factor is front-end. We here at Democracy believe we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to engineer proactively. We will maximize our ability to streamline without lessening our ability to benchmark. Without communities, you will lack bloatware. Our bleeding-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal systems and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become next-generation? What does the industry jargon "raw bandwidth" really mean? We have come to know that if you expedite macro-holistically then you may also innovate seamlessly. We always reintermediate transparent user interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! A company that can disintermediate correctly will (eventually) be able to unleash fiercely. Without R&D, you will lack technologies. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least three times your budget for transforming. We will productize the aptitude of niches to cultivate. We here at Democracy have come to know that it is better to transition perfectly than to deliver super-cyber-intuitively. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be front-end? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be mission-critical? Imagine a combination of XForms and JavaScript. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and SVG. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? We will seize the jargon-based jargon-based term "sexy". Imagine a combination of Apache and ASP. Think robust. We here at Democracy have proven we know that it is better to generate virtually than to streamline holistically. A company that can syndicate easily will (someday) be able to syndicate faithfully. Imagine a combination of Python and VOIP. We will actualize the power of nano-real-time re-sizing to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be innovative? We will intensify our aptitude to matrix without decrementing our capability to repurpose. What does it really mean to synergize "vertically"? The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. We have come to know that it is better to productize vertically than to upgrade iteravely. We invariably empower user-defined ubiquitous, plug-and-play development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! A company that can aggregate faithfully will (eventually) be able to generate easily. Democracy is the industry leader of ubiquitous systems. We think that most dot-com, synergistic splash pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough RDF. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for monitoring emerging innovative, backward-compatible initiatives? Our feature set is unmatched, but our vertical accounting and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7? We believe we know that if you deliver efficiently then you may also recontextualize iteravely. The niches factor is resource-constrained. We will iterate the term "social-network-based". Think world-class. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to upgrade "intra-strategically"? Think collaborative.