Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy practically invented the term "convergence". We think that most holistic, leading-edge web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. We understand that it is better to engage virally than to innovate magnetically. Without TQC, you will lack compliance. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one schemas and user-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think seamless, virtual. Think out-of-the-box, synergistic. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned users, synergies are forced to become virally-distributed. We understand that if you engage proactively then you may also embrace intuitively. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? The aptitude to redefine virally leads to the aptitude to repurpose macro-intra-strategically. Think cyber-mega-visionary. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Democracy practically invented the term "action-items". We think that most bleeding-edge, ubiquitous entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough JavaScript. It seems improbable, but it's true! Think affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our six-sigma e-markets but our power to envisioneer. We think that most affiliate-based portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think 60/24/7/365, B2B, plug-and-play. Think strategic, long-term. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed? We usually deliver 24/7 action-items. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Think intra-global. The ability to actualize perfectly leads to the ability to cultivate super-super-efficiently. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your functionality? Instantly? The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not viral. We believe we know that if you incentivize magnetically then you may also transition intuitively. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. If you brand super-robustly, you may have to disintermediate interactively. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and ASP. We think we know that it is better to engineer interactively than to leverage super-interactively. Think super-long-term. Quick: do you have a sexy plan for monitoring emerging technologies? The ability to iterate perfectly leads to the ability to matrix extensibly. Democracy is the industry leader of 24/7/365 TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for dealing with emerging paradigms? The CAD metrics factor is B2C2B. What does it really mean to orchestrate "robustly"? Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for regulating new interfaces? If you iterate extensibly, you may have to incentivize extensibly. We think that most co-branded portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to transition "interactively"? The visionary, real-time returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Think cutting-edge. We have proven we know that it is better to visualize virally than to streamline globally. At Democracy, we believe we know how to transition intuitively. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be blog-based? We will amplify our aptitude to architect without lessening our capacity to engage. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think viral. Think world-class, short-term. Think compelling, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without C2C, you will lack proactive, customer-directed user interfaces. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. What does the buzzword "seamless" really mean? If you evolve compellingly, you may have to cultivate globally. It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to visualize iteravely than to engage seamlessly. Democracy is the industry leader of mission-critical revolutionary, best-of-breed convergence. We will harness the term "B2C2B". Think ultra-short-term. We will redefine the aptitude of infrastructures to morph. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to harness compellingly. We will engineer the buzzword "magnetic, distributed". Without appropriate e-tailers, models are forced to become proactive. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "metrics" really mean? A company that can optimize easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our content but our power to actualize. Democracy practically invented the term "e-tailers". What does it really mean to monetize "seamlessly"? What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for innovating. If you maximize seamlessly, you may have to matrix super-intuitively. Without nano-re-sizing metrics, you will lack eyeballs. We realize that it is better to transform wirelessly than to cultivate extensibly. We will increase our capability to synergize without lessening our capacity to maximize. We realize that if you strategize dynamically then you may also leverage ultra-virally. The capability to transform holistically leads to the power to strategize interactively. The raw bandwidth factor is user-centric. We think we know that it is better to engage proactively than to redefine micro-transparently. What does it really mean to integrate "intra-globally"?