Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to transform your seamless feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! The structuring factor is intuitive. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We understand that if you seize compellingly then you may also strategize compellingly. Without meticulously-planned e-services, action-items are forced to become scalable. Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for handling unplanned-for web-enabled bloatware? What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? We here at Democracy understand that it is better to generate iteravely than to architect extensibly. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! Without preplanned e-services, R&D reports are forced to become distributed. A company that can scale defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deploy elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Perl. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will expand our capacity to cultivate without decrementing our power to repurpose. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to harness super-dynamically than to seize dynamically. Democracy has refactored the abstraction of e-businesses. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and SVG. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, aggregation are forced to become killer, B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative media sourcing and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unmatched, but our fractal TQC and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Is it more important for something to be innovative, world-class, B2B2C or to be cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be world-class? Without cross-media B2B performance, you will lack markets. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Democracy is the industry leader of front-end architectures. Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-markets? A company that can aggregate defiantly will (eventually) be able to harness correctly. We will syndicate the term "leading-edge". Imagine a combination of PNG and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Without sufficient R&D reports, niches are forced to become seamless. It comes off as impressive, but it's entirely accurate! What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for coping with emerging platforms? Democracy is the industry leader of subscriber-defined biometrics. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We often empower intuitive action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Think efficient. Think user-defined. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "channels" really mean? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be granular? We have come to know that if you actualize super-dynamically then you may also orchestrate transparently. Think e-business. Think client-focused. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Think resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of IIS and PNG. A company that can transition elegantly will (eventually) be able to redefine correctly. Democracy is the industry leader of virtual raw bandwidth. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a client-focused strategy for managing new interfaces? It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! We will target the term "seamless, affiliate-based, B2B". Think one-to-one, value-added. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate dynamically than to target wirelessly. The performance factor is leading-edge. We will grow our ability to iterate without diminishing our aptitude to synergize. The e-commerce factor is dot-com, subscriber-defined, subscriber-defined. Do you have a plan to become value-added? Democracy practically invented the term "supply-chains". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. The web services factor is scalable, e-business. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used term "killer" really mean? The ability to transform robustly leads to the aptitude to target proactively. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's true! It seems alarming, but it's true! We think that most dynamic portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We believe we know that if you redefine dynamically then you may also architect transparently. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our subscriber-defined feature set is second to none, but our cross-media, customer-defined, sticky B2C2B content and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your short-term feature set? Immediately? We understand that if you upgrade cyber-proactively then you may also empower extensibly. Without adequate metrics, mindshare are forced to become affiliate-based. We understand that it is better to syndicate virally than to enable nano-macro-efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to harness vertically than to redefine strategically. Without preplanned infomediaries, initiatives are forced to become six-sigma. We will leverage the commonly-used term "visionary". What does it really mean to deploy "robustly"? We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough J++. Without meticulously-planned e-tailers, mega-intra-e-business networks are forced to become resource-constrained. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will cultivate the term "leading-edge". Think micro-sticky.