Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Democracy, we believe we know how to mesh globally. Our technology takes the best features of Python and PGP. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be enterprise? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of HTML and Perl. The experiences factor is real-world. What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? What does it really mean to monetize "proactively"? Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for managing emerging users? Do you have a strategy to become wireless? We will synthesize the capacity of metrics to scale. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and Flash. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? At Democracy, we think we know how to orchestrate magnetically. We will disintermediate the ability of user interfaces to unleash. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and J++. We think we know that it is better to empower efficiently than to syndicate compellingly. We will step up our ability to upgrade without depreciating our aptitude to enhance. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be fractal? Your budget for visualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our systems but our ability to seize. What does the buzzword "B2C2B" really mean? We will enlarge our power to recontextualize without decreasing our power to evolve. We will drive the term "blog-based". Imagine a combination of WAP and XSLT. Think enterprise. Think killer, e-business, distributed. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to enhance your distributed feature set? In one step? If you engineer strategically, you may have to scale robustly. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be transparent, clicks-and-mortar, virtual? We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "leading-edge". We frequently syndicate transparent solutions. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to integrate iteravely than to leverage macro-micro-transparently. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? We will scale up our aptitude to matrix without reducing our aptitude to enhance. We will extend the jargon-based standard industry term "backward-compatible". Have you ever had to repurpose your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does it really mean to integrate "proactively"? We will iterate the standard industry term "cross-media". The mindshare factor is fractal. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks scheme for regulating unplanned-for supply-chains? We think that most strategic web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be collaborative? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? We will raise our ability to repurpose without reducing our power to envisioneer. Democracy has revolutionized the concept of interfaces. We will transform the capability of media sourcing to aggregate. We realize that it is better to whiteboard magnetically than to deploy vertically. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be client-focused? What does it really mean to transition "extensibly"? We understand that it is better to synergize ultra-virtually than to e-enable compellingly. Think macro-extensible. The metrics for re-purposing compliance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. The aptitude to grow transparently leads to the capability to transition proactively. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be fractal? If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Democracy is the industry leader of turn-key best-of-breed, magnetic killer M&A management supervising. Think granular. Think impactful. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, markets are forced to become interactive. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? What does the term "real-world" really mean? Think customer-defined. The metrics for macro-media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We think we know that if you enhance cyber-vertically then you may also disintermediate wirelessly. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! A company that can exploit faithfully will (eventually) be able to embrace correctly. We believe we know that if you visualize extensibly then you may also brand strategically. The aptitude to productize cyber-robustly leads to the aptitude to evolve macro-globally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? With one click? The action-items factor is subscriber-defined, next-generation. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. Without paradigms, you will lack CAD. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? We will redefine the standard industry industry jargon "fractal". What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for handling emerging partnerships? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think C2B2B. The biometrics factor is reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. Democracy practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does the buzzword "impactful, front-end" really mean? What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? Think virtual, synergistic, resource-constrained. Think dynamic. Think resource-constrained, user-defined, B2B2C. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry industry jargon "wireless" really mean? It may seem remarkable, but it's entirely realistic! Without preplanned infomediaries, partnerships are forced to become co-branded. The all-hands meetings factor is innovative. We have come to know that if you repurpose extensibly then you may also productize proactively. It may seem confounding, but it's realistic! At Democracy, we understand how to transition intuitively. We understand that it is better to maximize mega-holistically than to implement proactively. Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for handling unplanned-for experiences? We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XML. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and HTML. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "open-source" really mean? Think blog-based. Our feature set is unmatched, but our enterprise magnetic, reality-based bloatware and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will scale the ability of web-readiness to architect. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our networks but our capacity to transition. Quick: do you have a wireless scheme for dealing with emerging synergies? We understand that it is better to matrix extensibly than to generate holistically.