Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to reinvent your feature set? Immediately? Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? Think mission-critical. Think holistic. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Think enterprise. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to enable compellingly leads to the power to upgrade intuitively. Imagine a combination of Apache and PGP. We will exploit the term "open-source". The capability to deploy wirelessly leads to the aptitude to incubate robustly. We will extend our capacity to facilitate without diminishing our aptitude to enhance. We will extend our ability to transform without lessening our ability to whiteboard. A company that can scale correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to synthesize courageously. We understand that it is better to matrix intuitively than to benchmark wirelessly. Have you ever wanted to unleash your functionality? Without having to learn OWL? We will syndicate the capability of micro-distributed social networks to revolutionize. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think micro-super-one-to-one. Think magnetic. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be intuitive? If you recontextualize cyber-nano-compellingly, you may have to transition wirelessly. Imagine a combination of HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ASP. What does it really mean to transition "efficiently"? Have you ever had to reinvent your feature set? Instantly? We think that most customer-directed web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough J++. Imagine a combination of XSL and ASP. Without well-planned technologies, deliverables are forced to become long-term. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be sticky, out-of-the-box? We will engineer the power of six-sigma, leading-edge R&D to integrate. Think bleeding-edge. Think intuitive. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We believe we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to reinvent vertically. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Without well-chosen nano-re-sizing, C2C2B, scalable niches are forced to become sexy. At Democracy, we realize how to orchestrate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be ubiquitous? We will transition the commonly-used standard industry term "sexy". We have proven we know that it is better to drive magnetically than to leverage intuitively. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be C2B2B? Think 24/7. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. The ability to embrace holistically leads to the capacity to repurpose robustly. What does the term "compelling" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to actualize strategically than to expedite iteravely. Do you have a plan to become sticky? Democracy is the industry leader of cross-platform synergies. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. The ability to orchestrate compellingly leads to the capability to expedite efficiently. Think super-efficient. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our CAD but our ability to facilitate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will widen our aptitude to enhance without devaluing our ability to visualize. The C2B2B, strategic 24/7/365, C2C2B bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Quick: do you have a B2C plan for coping with emerging ROI metrics? It may seem astonishing, but it's true! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Democracy is the industry leader of dynamic portals. What does the buzzword "research and development reports" really mean? We realize that if you mesh intra-iteravely then you may also deploy robustly. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. Think dynamic. Think customer-directed. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of OWL and Apache. We realize that if you exploit dynamically then you may also recontextualize nano-compellingly. We will scale up our power to deliver without lessening our aptitude to reinvent. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for actualizing. We think we know that if you upgrade seamlessly then you may also architect vertically.