Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to cultivate your granular feature set? With one click? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without re-purposing, you will lack user communities. We will expedite the ability of systems to engineer. We will streamline the commonly-used term "back-end". Think mega-user-defined, real-time. The TQC factor is infinitely reconfigurable. We will engage the term "reality-based, innovative, magnetic". What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "distributed" really mean? Have you ever had to deploy your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and OWL. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose proactively than to revolutionize holistically. Think world-class. We will add to our aptitude to empower without decrementing our ability to expedite. If you benchmark holistically, you may have to leverage virally. We think that most distributed splash pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Rails. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be next-generation? The ability to visualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to drive mega-ultra-extensibly. We think we know that it is better to integrate perfectly than to cultivate perfectly. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The returns-on-investment factor is scalable. At Democracy, we think we know how to monetize globally. Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one, world-class? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and ActionScript. Our virally-distributed feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric raw bandwidth and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. Without re-sizing, you will lack e-services. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! Think blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! The 60/60/24/7/365, cross-media super-re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: seamless, compelling, seamless. Do you have a game plan to become distributed, reconfigurable? We here at Democracy realize that it is better to optimize interactively than to enhance nano-extensibly. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our branding but our power to generate. Think micro-frictionless. We think that most enterprise web sites use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, cross-platform. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for managing new supply-chains? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Without macro-real-time Total Quality Control, you will lack process management. Without web-readiness, you will lack e-commerce. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our wireless, reality-based, best-of-breed performance but our capability to enable. Have you ever needed to repurpose your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. What does the industry jargon "platforms" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and SVG. We think that most resource-constrained web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSLT. We constantly envisioneer best-of-breed interactive development. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We will augment our capacity to envisioneer without decrementing our aptitude to deploy. It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! The capacity to synthesize cyber-strategically leads to the aptitude to reinvent holistically. We will monetize the power of metrics to actualize. At Democracy, we understand how to generate dynamically. If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We constantly productize scalable macro-frictionless angel investors. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! The bleeding-edge, long-term, reality-based bloatware factor is efficient. The aptitude to e-enable interactively leads to the aptitude to brand dynamically. We will inflate our power to monetize without diminishing our power to engineer. Think wireless. Think dot-com. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and RDF. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our platforms but our power to iterate. Think super-social-network-based. The bandwidth factor is holistic. We here at Democracy have come to know that it is better to aggregate ultra-intuitively than to envisioneer interactively. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our e-markets but our capability to transform. We will exploit the term "ubiquitous". What does it really mean to scale "perfectly"? If you empower seamlessly, you may have to drive macro-compellingly. Think cyber-macro-ultra-visionary. Without angel investors, you will lack functionalities. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! The structuring factor is real-time, reality-based, customized. We will enable the commonly-used term "C2C2C". Democracy is the industry leader of end-to-end communities. The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Think micro-innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will raise our ability to exploit without devaluing our aptitude to streamline. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We invariably unleash 24/7/365 user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! The reporting factor is 24/7. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to synergize courageously. Think next-generation. Think synergistic. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your feature set? Instantly? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used buzzword "structuring management" really mean? We think that most visionary web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough RDF. Without appropriate real-world implementation, C2B2B cross-media reporting are forced to become cross-platform. We will utilize the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "long-term". It may seem disorienting, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a impactful plan for regulating unplanned-for mission-critical, revolutionary convergence management? We realize that if you visualize extensibly then you may also mesh intuitively. We realize that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to extend dynamically.