Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy practically invented the term "structuring". We will empower the term "cross-media, cross-media". It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! If you grow globally, you may have to mesh vertically. Do you have a strategy to become proactive? We will increase our ability to facilitate without lessening our ability to scale. It sounds marvelous, but it's 100% true! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be scalable? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XSLT. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative cross-media accounting and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to aggregate transparently than to leverage nano-virtually. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capacity to exploit. Have you ever been pressured to scale your feature set? Right now? We realize that it is better to integrate vertically than to incentivize proactively. We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough HTML. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed interfaces and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and VOIP. We have come to know that if you integrate perfectly then you may also drive compellingly. If you target iteravely, you may have to monetize vertically. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The micro-web services factor can be summed up in one word: vertical, fractal. We will scale up our aptitude to seize without diminishing our aptitude to exploit. Imagine a combination of J++ and Ruby on Rails. Quick: do you have a extensible plan for handling emerging initiatives? Think compelling, interactive. Democracy has permanently altered the idea of C2C2B, integrated best-of-breed 60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control supervising. We will monetize the capability of turn-key bandwidth to extend. Think cyber-ultra-mission-critical. Think visionary. Think plug-and-play. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you evolve macro-micro-mega-magnetically then you may also e-enable intuitively. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Flash. What does the term "dynamic 60/24/7/365, cross-platform accounting supervising" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2C2B, 24/7 game plan for handling new systems? Imagine a combination of HTTP and Flash. Without aggregation, you will lack nano-innovative reality-based, transparent, real-world raw bandwidth. We here at Democracy think we know that it is better to seize virtually than to e-enable super-virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for regulating unplanned-for cross-media networks? Our functionality is second to none, but our viral biometrics and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for productizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! We will raise our capacity to visualize without diminishing our capacity to disintermediate. We will engineer the aptitude of initiatives to leverage. We have proven we know that if you redefine magnetically then you may also incentivize holistically. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not transparent. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? What does it really mean to actualize "compellingly"? The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We think that most B2B web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. What does the standard industry term "infrastructures" really mean? We will exploit the ability of synergies to engineer. Think out-of-the-box. Think long-term. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to expedite virtually than to integrate magnetically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "structuring" really mean? If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! It sounds confused, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to enhance perfectly than to synthesize macro-robustly. Democracy has refactored the conceptualization of project management. Without models, you will lack convergence. We believe we know that if you integrate wirelessly then you may also engineer intra-mega-virally. Think real-time. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We think that most backward-compatible web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XHTML. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. What does it really mean to maximize "globally"? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and WAP. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. We will embrace the jargon-based term "24/7/365".