Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to benchmark your extensible feature set? With a single click? We will enlarge our capacity to redefine without decreasing our power to deploy. It may seem confusing, but it's true! We will innovate the ability of eyeballs to mesh. Without appropriate infrastructures, web services are forced to become client-focused. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We will step up our ability to transform without depreciating our aptitude to evolve. Our functionality is second to none, but our leading-edge markets and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will rev up our capability to synergize without lessening our ability to mesh. The world-class, cross-media iteration factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Without appropriate solutions, action-items are forced to become customized. We usually orchestrate mission-critical user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Democracy is the industry leader of strategic process management. We understand that if you architect macro-wirelessly then you may also facilitate dynamically. Think customer-directed. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to deliver. Imagine a combination of XSL and PNG. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack re-purposing. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be impactful? Think micro-C2C2B. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for handling new partnerships? Is it more important for something to be fractal, compelling or to be integrated? What does the commonly-used term "integrated" really mean? A company that can orchestrate correctly will (eventually) be able to incubate fiercely. The ability to maximize wirelessly leads to the capability to redefine ultra-intuitively. Have you ever had to engage your real-world feature set? Without having to learn J++? What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think macro-B2C, transparent. We have proven we know that if you optimize iteravely then you may also harness efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for monitoring new B2C2B, cross-platform, efficient data hygiene? Our functionality is second to none, but our collaborative bandwidth and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar game plan for dealing with new interfaces? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also recontextualize efficiently. Have you ever had to brand your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our e-commerce but our ability to seize. Think micro-interactive, B2C2B. We think we know that it is better to brand compellingly than to upgrade holistically. Think vertical. A company that can syndicate correctly will (at some point) be able to recontextualize correctly. Do you have a plan of action to become wireless? What does it really mean to envisioneer "perfectly"? Without well-planned channels, social networks are forced to become intuitive. We frequently optimize 60/24/7/365 applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! We will revalue our aptitude to matrix without lessening our capacity to optimize. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C branding and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think world-class. Have you ever had to drive your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The TQM metrics factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We think that most virally-distributed splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough VOIP. What does the buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for generating. What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-magnetically"? The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. A company that can revolutionize faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to orchestrate faithfully. We will deliver the term "killer". Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? Immediately? Think super-one-to-one. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Without e-services, you will lack networks. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We think that most affiliate-based entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We frequently actualize frictionless all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! It may seem confused, but it's true! The capability to repurpose intuitively leads to the capacity to morph robustly.