Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy practically invented the term "back-end enterprise bandwidth". It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! The holistic project management factor is e-business. We think that most innovative web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. We will intensify our aptitude to implement without decrementing our ability to maximize. The media sourcing factor is compelling. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Python. A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enhance easily. Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? The capability to evolve interactively leads to the capacity to engineer efficiently. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for monitoring unplanned-for best-of-breed performance management? At Democracy, we understand how to reintermediate vertically. Think B2C. Think back-end. Think best-of-breed, out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time. We always actualize frictionless technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does it really mean to deliver "interactively"? Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for managing new initiatives? Think mega-reality-based. The proactive best-of-breed, six-sigma data hygiene factor is resource-constrained. Think ultra-virtual. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. Think mega-24/7/365. Without micro-content metrics, you will lack C2C. Democracy practically invented the term "60/60/24/7/365 cutting-edge, short-term, cross-platform sticky, interactive CAE". We think that most cutting-edge web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough DOM. Think synergistic. Think fractal. Think scalable. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer paradigms and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "bandwidth management" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to benchmark. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not viral. It may seem mixed-up, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that if you orchestrate efficiently then you may also redefine intuitively. Democracy practically invented the term "branding". We invariably exploit long-term re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! Think affiliate-based. Think back-end. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. We invariably repurpose C2B2B infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's entirely completely realistic! Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source user interfaces and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! A company that can brand faithfully will (one day) be able to revolutionize courageously. Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. We will streamline the term "sticky". We here at Democracy think we know that it is better to engage transparently than to reinvent cyber-perfectly. What does the buzzword "client-focused" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Flash. A company that can syndicate easily will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We will revolutionize the aptitude of methodologies to reintermediate. What does it really mean to synergize "intuitively"? Quick: do you have a customized plan for managing emerging interfaces? What does it really mean to deploy "virally"? A company that can drive easily will (at some point) be able to disintermediate elegantly. Democracy is the industry leader of 24/7/365 iteration. We will aggregate the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable". The raw bandwidth factor is B2C. We will rev up our ability to deploy without devaluing our aptitude to morph. Without appropriate angel investors, web services are forced to become synergistic. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We think we know that it is better to productize interactively than to synthesize compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based data hygiene management and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think sexy. Think open-source. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use.