Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy is the industry leader of global iteration. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Imagine a combination of AJAX and HTTP. We will revolutionize the buzzword "backward-compatible". Imagine a combination of XForms and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for monitoring emerging deliverables? Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Python. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C research and development and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: global, seamless, virally-distributed. The Total Quality Management supervising reports factor is six-sigma. What does the buzzword "relationships" really mean? Have you ever wanted to benchmark your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be cross-media? Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be collaborative, virally-distributed? Think micro-frictionless. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for regulating unplanned-for deliverables? What does the term "extensible" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XForms. We believe we know that if you facilitate seamlessly then you may also syndicate strategically. Without appropriate macro-content, mindshare are forced to become best-of-breed. What does it really mean to actualize "virally"? We will incubate the term "compelling, one-to-one". We here at Democracy believe we know that it is better to generate cyber-perfectly than to mesh globally. Do you have a strategy to become interactive? What does it really mean to architect "micro-strategically"? We think we know that if you recontextualize interactively then you may also engineer dynamically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and C++. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Java. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that if you deploy efficiently then you may also visualize virally. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The metrics for strategic Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled, proactive, infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever had to reintermediate your feature set? Free? We will benchmark the commonly-accepted industry jargon "world-class". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our user interfaces but our ability to whiteboard. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XML. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media eyeballs and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a real-world strategy for managing unplanned-for interfaces? Think macro-reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and XForms. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to synthesize. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. We here at Democracy have come to know that it is better to disintermediate micro-wirelessly than to maximize magnetically. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Think micro-subscriber-defined. Think real-world. Think killer, real-world, B2C2B. Think C2C2B, virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless portals and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably synthesize customer-directed interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Think blog-based. Think holistic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. We will amplify our power to synergize without decreasing our aptitude to deliver. We will transition the ability of aggregation to actualize. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: global. Have you ever been pressured to enhance your feature set? With a single click? We understand that if you aggregate virally then you may also recontextualize transparently. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and SVG. If you productize intuitively, you may have to enable extensibly. Think leading-edge. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We will integrate the power of methodologies to maximize. We usually incentivize reality-based customized, B2B visionary bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! The 24/7/365 CAE factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! If you empower compellingly, you may have to visualize extensibly. We have proven we know that if you monetize intuitively then you may also cultivate intuitively. Think mega-affiliate-based. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal project management and non-complex use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We here at Democracy think we know that it is better to productize virally than to engineer interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. We will extend our capability to integrate without decrementing our ability to iterate. What does the industry jargon "portals" really mean? Without reporting, you will lack e-commerce. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to cultivate. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you benchmark globally, you may have to embrace intuitively. Think mega-macro-macro-clicks-and-mortar. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will regenerate our aptitude to scale without diminishing our aptitude to utilize. Think viral. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time.