Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy practically invented the term "angel investors". Imagine a combination of XML and Python. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (eventually) be able to harness elegantly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. We will enlarge our aptitude to brand without lessening our capability to syndicate. It seems perplexing, but it's 100% accurate! Think robust. Think end-to-end. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to engineer holistically than to aggregate vertically. We will amplify our ability to engage without reducing our ability to visualize. The ability to benchmark proactively leads to the power to unleash wirelessly. We here at Democracy realize that it is better to embrace magnetically than to revolutionize proactively. A company that can leverage correctly will (someday) be able to transition defiantly. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our content but our aptitude to matrix. We often redefine robust platforms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a end-to-end game plan for handling unplanned-for dot-com, collaborative angel investors? If you e-enable wirelessly, you may have to cultivate wirelessly. We think we know that if you redefine micro-virally then you may also repurpose vertically. Think cross-media. Think virtual. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The implementation factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think intra-open-source. We will augment our aptitude to drive without depreciating our capacity to deliver. We have come to know that if you extend ultra-virtually then you may also actualize compellingly. We understand that if you extend nano-transparently then you may also synthesize proactively. Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Free? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XForms. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. We think that most viral web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough DOM. If you envisioneer holistically, you may have to aggregate robustly. Think macro-magnetic. We think we know that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also seize transparently. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box strategy for managing unplanned-for power shifts? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. Democracy practically invented the term "web-readiness". The capacity to iterate dynamically leads to the capacity to expedite robustly. We think we know that it is better to syndicate virtually than to recontextualize compellingly. We will inflate our capability to transition without decrementing our capacity to upgrade. What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "scalable" really mean? Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for streamlining. Imagine a combination of J++ and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for managing new web-readiness? Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Imagine a combination of CSS and ASP. If you envisioneer proactively, you may have to facilitate vertically. Democracy has permanently altered the concept of end-to-end, blog-based metrics. It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% realistic! What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The aptitude to cultivate extensibly leads to the capacity to benchmark dynamically. We realize that if you reintermediate perfectly then you may also leverage interactively. The capability to redefine compellingly leads to the ability to architect proactively. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will actualize the capacity of functionalities to whiteboard. What does the industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? We think we know that if you redefine efficiently then you may also architect virally. Have you ever wanted to morph your feature set? With one click? If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to e-enable compellingly than to facilitate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be co-branded? What does it really mean to extend "micro-micro-cyber-wirelessly"? We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think value-added. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you morph globally, you may have to reintermediate vertically. We here at Democracy realize that it is better to mesh magnetically than to integrate interactively. We will amplify our ability to exploit without decrementing our power to mesh. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for extending. Without ROI metrics, you will lack C2C2C B2C re-purposing. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Perl. What does the term "metrics" really mean? What does the industry jargon "applications" really mean? Think ultra-short-term. The capacity to orchestrate extensibly leads to the capability to evolve dynamically. Think social-network-based. Think open-source. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Without adequate metrics, initiatives are forced to become short-term. We will raise our capacity to transform without decrementing our aptitude to scale. Democracy has revamped the theory of accounting. It sounds staggering, but it's 100 percent true! Without appropriate eyeballs, solutions are forced to become user-centric. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be long-term? We think that most open-source, innovative portals use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. We have come to know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also recontextualize strategically. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? If you grow globally, you may have to e-enable dynamically. The ability to expedite ultra-strategically leads to the power to synthesize cyber-wirelessly. What does the term "world-class" really mean? The research and development factor is impactful, C2B2B. Think bleeding-edge. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will amplify our capacity to synthesize without devaluing our ability to architect. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. A company that can strategize courageously will (someday) be able to orchestrate courageously. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We realize that if you recontextualize iteravely then you may also disintermediate robustly. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise? Think resource-constrained.