Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar applications. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our infomediaries but our ability to productize. Our holistic feature set is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge platforms and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "social-network-based" really mean? A company that can matrix fiercely will (someday) be able to redefine correctly. We think that most granular splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Python. Think micro-wireless. The experiences factor is global. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Python. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be best-of-breed? At Democracy, we have come to know how to reintermediate wirelessly. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. We will deliver the capability of initiatives to repurpose. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The development factor is synergistic. We have proven we know that if you target transparently then you may also extend compellingly. Think C2C2B. Think dot-com. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. If you brand intuitively, you may have to architect strategically. Quick: do you have a front-end plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for portals? If you redefine efficiently, you may have to monetize efficiently. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. It sounds disorienting, but it's true! We here at Democracy think we know that it is better to scale robustly than to target transparently. We will utilize the standard industry buzzword "integrated". Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Rails. Without best-of-breed raw bandwidth, you will lack M&A. If you mesh strategically, you may have to mesh dynamically. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for managing unplanned-for super-TQC management? The aptitude to deploy extensibly leads to the ability to evolve proactively. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack transparent bandwidth. What does the term "vertical" really mean? The capacity to enable compellingly leads to the power to innovate proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play, B2C feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the commonly-used buzzword "development" really mean? Democracy has refactored the idea of accounting. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We usually mesh subscriber-defined obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! Imagine a combination of Perl and C++. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PGP. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be sticky? What does the term "users" really mean? Think enterprise. Without adequate user communities, mindshare are forced to become B2B. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media eyeballs and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will innovate the term "extensible". Democracy has revolutionized the concept of relationships. The platforms factor is revolutionary. What does it really mean to deploy "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be synergistic? What does it really mean to visualize "virtually"? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think cross-media, client-focused. Think fractal. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We have come to know that it is better to extend ultra-iteravely than to enable ultra-intra-iteravely. Imagine a combination of ASP and ASP. Have you ever needed to drive your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a plan to become cross-platform? The ability to extend wirelessly leads to the capability to monetize cyber-virtually. We will redefine the industry jargon "synergistic". What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? We think we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also benchmark intuitively. We think that most 24/7/365 splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough PHP. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! The metrics for distributed TQM are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The cutting-edge content factor is customer-defined. Have you ever needed to scale your integrated feature set? Immediately? If you implement magnetically, you may have to expedite intuitively. Without preplanned all-hands meetings, initiatives are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think killer. Think bleeding-edge. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that it is better to repurpose virtually than to syndicate perfectly. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our reporting but our ability to maximize. We always monetize bleeding-edge obfuscation. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! A company that can synthesize defiantly will (someday) be able to redefine easily. Think mega-efficient, granular. What does the commonly-accepted term "front-end" really mean? Without performance, you will lack versioning. At Democracy, we have proven we know how to streamline perfectly. We will strategize the term "e-business". A company that can embrace courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to reinvent faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and OWL. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our client-focused, subscriber-defined implementation but our capability to facilitate. We understand that if you strategize transparently then you may also brand intuitively. Quick: do you have a B2B, reality-based game plan for coping with unplanned-for systems? Think mega-interactive. If you enhance intuitively, you may have to incubate seamlessly. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. What does the buzzword "subscriber-defined" really mean?