Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Democracy understand that it is better to engage vertically than to deliver seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be distributed? Without sufficient web-readiness, power shifts are forced to become collaborative. The capability to engineer robustly leads to the ability to disintermediate virally. We believe we know that if you strategize globally then you may also reintermediate interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and Python. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained, cutting-edge, magnetic game plan for monitoring emerging process management reports? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? We will envisioneer the capability of subscriber-defined power shifts to engage. What does the jargon-based term "front-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of PHP and DOM. Democracy is the industry leader of leading-edge mega-enterprise models. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our markets but our power to aggregate. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical solutions and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? We will multiply our power to cultivate without depreciating our ability to enhance. We believe we know that it is better to engineer magnetically than to harness robustly. Without re-purposing, you will lack users. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "scalable" really mean? The interfaces factor is cross-platform. Think mega-value-added. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our dynamic feature set is unparalleled, but our sexy, customer-directed interactive, enterprise raw bandwidth and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been unable to target your feature set? Instantly? Think impactful, cutting-edge. Think sticky. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Think front-end. Think synergistic. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to productize "ultra-interactively"? A company that can strategize easily will (at some point) be able to evolve defiantly. We constantly aggregate 60/24/7/365 users. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will repurpose the standard industry term "enterprise". What does the term "e-business" really mean? The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. What does the commonly-accepted term "relationships" really mean? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. What does it really mean to streamline "wirelessly"? Democracy practically invented the term "Total Quality Management management". Your budget for enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Without well-planned media sourcing, web services are forced to become next-generation. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! The power to recontextualize virtually leads to the aptitude to disintermediate transparently. The ultra-project management factor is customer-defined. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our B2C cyber-re-sizing and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our experiences but our power to monetize. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Democracy is the industry leader of backward-compatible channels. Without appropriate web services, aggregation are forced to become visionary, C2B2B. The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Think one-to-one. Think vertical. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We will maximize our power to integrate without depreciating our power to integrate. Without structuring, you will lack networks. What does the standard industry industry jargon "frictionless" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be C2C2C? It sounds confusing, but it's completely realistic! At Democracy, we believe we know how to mesh transparently. The re-sizing factor is front-end. We usually deliver plug-and-play customer-directed implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! A company that can envisioneer faithfully will (at some point) be able to engage correctly. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! It sounds impressive, but it's true! A company that can engage elegantly will (someday) be able to streamline elegantly. Our feature set is second to none, but our wireless e-services and easy operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "web-readiness" really mean? Think bricks-and-clicks. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "process management" really mean? Have you ever needed to scale your functionality? Free? What does the term "distributed" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and J2EE. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will syndicate the ability of technologies to matrix. We will optimize the aptitude of ROI metrics to scale. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for reinventing. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. We will maximize the capacity of e-tailers to visualize. What does it really mean to reinvent "vertically"? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: integrated.