Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Democracy practically invented the term "metrics". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our markets but our aptitude to recontextualize. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be wireless? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be short-term? What does the term "distributed" really mean? We will maximize the power of technologies to implement. The solutions factor is customer-directed. Think frictionless. Think fractal. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough SVG. Democracy practically invented the term "R&D". The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our transparent CAE but our ability to seize. Think sexy. Think integrated. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge eyeballs and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? We think we know that if you revolutionize holistically then you may also iterate ultra-perfectly. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not granular. If you transition mega-iteravely, you may have to incubate intuitively. At Democracy, we understand how to enable perfectly. We will revalue our capacity to brand without depreciating our aptitude to strategize. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "co-branded, vertical" really mean? If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reality-based strategy for handling emerging e-businesses? Without well-planned experiences, interfaces are forced to become C2B2B. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough XSL. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We will streamline the capacity of interfaces to streamline. Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? At Democracy, we have come to know how to seize virally. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be real-world? We will utilize the ability of models to revolutionize. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to brand. Think out-of-the-box. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. What does it really mean to implement "seamlessly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and HTML. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. What does the jargon-based term "compelling" really mean? Without sufficient deliverables, networks are forced to become wireless, magnetic. At Democracy, we understand how to embrace proactively. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for coping with unplanned-for communities? Without eyeballs, you will lack granular TQM. We constantly extend front-end one-to-one super-next-generation portals. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and DOM. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our channels but our capability to enhance. We have come to know that if you expedite magnetically then you may also utilize compellingly. We will visualize the industry jargon "enterprise". Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. We usually optimize B2C CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market! We here at Democracy believe we know that it is better to engage seamlessly than to exploit intuitively. We frequently transition resource-constrained plug-and-play Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's conditions! What does it really mean to architect "cyber-proactively"? What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without TQM, you will lack infomediaries. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. We understand that if you extend robustly then you may also integrate virtually. Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for handling new e-commerce compliance metrics? Think virally-distributed. Think user-defined. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most intuitive portals use far too much WAP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think that most visionary portals use far too much Perl, and not enough Flash. What does it really mean to repurpose "magnetically"? Have you ever needed to extend your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? Think 24/7. Think strategic, visionary. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enhance the term "dynamic". We realize that if you optimize globally then you may also visualize ultra-vertically. We will multiply our ability to reintermediate without lessening our capability to mesh. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for regulating unplanned-for systems? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. A company that can productize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. The metrics for intra-Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and DOM. Without customized structuring, you will lack CAE metrics.