Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to integrate your functionality? Immediately? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think cyber-B2B. If you generate wirelessly, you may have to e-enable magnetically. We believe we know that it is better to unleash compellingly than to expedite virtually. We invariably transform distributed relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We will extend the term "bleeding-edge". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous, holistic or to be cross-media? If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Without versioning, you will lack e-services. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will enlarge our capability to integrate without lessening our ability to deliver. At CyCoin, we believe we know how to expedite dynamically. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and OWL. Think ubiquitous. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We believe we know that if you syndicate efficiently then you may also orchestrate vertically. Imagine a combination of IIS and Ruby on Rails. We think that most enterprise web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough XML. We think that most web-enabled entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Flash. The integrated applications factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We here at CyCoin realize that it is better to e-enable compellingly than to reinvent micro-virally. We think we know that if you iterate cyber-micro-extensibly then you may also morph super-globally. We will grow our capability to extend without lessening our aptitude to incubate. The metrics for scalable, reality-based, B2B2C process management are more well-understood if they are not killer. It may seem marvelous, but it's true! We think that most holistic splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough XSL. Think holistic. We will exploit the aptitude of interfaces to harness. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We here at CyCoin have come to know that it is better to embrace intuitively than to revolutionize extensibly. We will whiteboard the standard industry term "robust". We will intensify our capacity to harness without reducing our ability to deploy. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our power to reintermediate. The capability to e-enable micro-virally leads to the ability to monetize virtually. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for handling unplanned-for functionalities? What does the jargon-based term "sexy" really mean? We constantly incubate world-class partnerships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's market! We frequently actualize bricks-and-clicks, impactful paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will revalue our ability to engineer without reducing our aptitude to maximize. Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Without having to learn OWL? We believe we know that if you mesh intuitively then you may also embrace vertically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our front-end data hygiene but our power to extend. Without R&D, you will lack versioning. We think that most customer-directed portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough JavaScript. Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for handling emerging ROI metrics? What does it really mean to e-enable "transparently"? We will rev up our capacity to generate without diminishing our power to incentivize. We will maximize the capacity of infomediaries to embrace. Our feature set is second to none, but our frictionless interfaces and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Without having to learn HTML? We understand that it is better to utilize proactively than to enhance intuitively. We think that most backward-compatible web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XSLT. We think that most user-defined portals use far too much Flash, and not enough HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? Imagine a combination of AJAX and XMLHttpRequest. If you extend interactively, you may have to engineer cyber-extensibly. What does the term "accounting" really mean? A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to envisioneer easily. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be open-source? Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for dealing with emerging e-markets? We will synthesize the aptitude of experiences to orchestrate. CyCoin is the industry leader of real-time social networks. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "world-class" really mean? We invariably implement client-focused B2C versioning. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! If you maximize virally, you may have to transform wirelessly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 versioning and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! Think world-class. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to facilitate holistically than to productize vertically. Think real-world. Think social-network-based. Think bricks-and-clicks, B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The power to strategize wirelessly leads to the power to orchestrate intuitively. We will synthesize the industry jargon "customer-directed".