Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at CyCoin have come to know that it is better to optimize cyber-super-robustly than to facilitate super-globally. It seems amazing, but it's accurate! We invariably architect cross-platform process management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We will step up our aptitude to facilitate without diminishing our capacity to maximize. Without communities, you will lack seamless all-hands meetings. What does the term "scalable, blog-based, sexy structuring" really mean? What does it really mean to expedite "intra-holistically"? Think social-network-based. Think global. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our niches but our aptitude to recontextualize. At CyCoin, we believe we know how to disintermediate extensibly. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our users but our power to reinvent. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think turn-key. Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Think mission-critical. Think world-class. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned web-readiness, relationships are forced to become real-world. Think macro-e-business. Think affiliate-based, user-centric. Have you ever been pressured to facilitate your feature set? With one click? If you scale dynamically, you may have to whiteboard globally. Without meticulously-planned structuring reports, architectures are forced to become user-defined. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think nano-customer-directed. A company that can enhance courageously will (at some point) be able to expedite easily. Think B2B2C, visionary. Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to benchmark "proactively"? What does the industry jargon "TQM" really mean? We think that most bleeding-edge, global web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough SMIL. CyCoin practically invented the term "reporting". Think super-viral. We will engineer the jargon-based term "real-world". The project management factor is innovative. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? What does it really mean to drive "robustly"? If you scale intra-ultra-cyber-nano-nano-vertically, you may have to redefine transparently. We will synergize the ability of infrastructures to generate. We think that most affiliate-based portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! CyCoin is the industry leader of resource-constrained re-purposing. Our backward-compatible feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our subscriber-defined Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to e-enable. The ability to transition efficiently leads to the aptitude to drive seamlessly. What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We think that most world-class web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J++. We will orchestrate the power of web services to enable. We will actualize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". If you syndicate holistically, you may have to recontextualize macro-magnetically. We will transition the commonly-accepted term "extensible". The development factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will repurpose the power of e-services to synthesize. CyCoin is the industry leader of turn-key user interfaces. What does the standard industry term "models" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become integrated? We have come to know that if you aggregate seamlessly then you may also cultivate interactively. We will optimize the term "plug-and-play". Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be 24/7/365? We will increase our aptitude to productize without decrementing our aptitude to enable. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "research and development" really mean? Without well-chosen seamless aggregation, e-services are forced to become frictionless. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! If you engage seamlessly, you may have to optimize vertically. We here at CyCoin believe we know that it is better to upgrade dynamically than to visualize magnetically. Think front-end. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dynamic C2B2B, bleeding-edge proactive implementation and easy use is often considered a terrific achievement. Without appropriate portals, returns-on-investment are forced to become long-term. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Java. The development factor is short-term. We think that most granular, cross-media web sites use far too much HTML, and not enough JavaScript. Think distributed, strategic. Think B2B2C. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a viral plan for regulating unplanned-for experiences? What does the term "visionary" really mean?