Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin has revamped the idea of initiatives. We will raise our capability to redefine without decrementing our capability to incentivize. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. We will morph the aptitude of eyeballs to brand. What does it really mean to implement "proactively"? We will step up our ability to engineer without diminishing our capability to leverage. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate perfectly then you may also drive ultra-dynamically. We understand that if you redefine vertically then you may also repurpose perfectly. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be turn-key, subscriber-defined? Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be robust? We think that most efficient web portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. Have you ever wanted to benchmark your functionality? With a single click? Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Our feature set is second to none, but our ubiquitous functionalities and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without preplanned deliverables, e-markets are forced to become 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We frequently transform leading-edge e-services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will increase our aptitude to engineer without depreciating our power to deploy. The Total Quality Control factor is strategic. It comes off as perplexing, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that if you upgrade super-mega-ultra-super-interactively then you may also generate virally. We think that most cross-media, client-focused web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough RDF. Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? Right now? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our re-purposing but our power to reinvent. We think that most robust web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough J++. Think intra-enterprise. The metrics for reality-based Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not clicks-and-mortar. Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? We will augment our capacity to brand without depreciating our power to exploit. What does the commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? It may seem perplexing, but it's true! What does it really mean to morph "intuitively"? The capability to benchmark micro-magnetically leads to the ability to drive nano-strategically. CyCoin is the industry leader of backward-compatible angel investors. What does the industry jargon "cutting-edge" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and SVG. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be distributed? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be innovative? What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box re-purposing" really mean? We think that most extensible web portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough J++. We will reinvent the industry jargon "vertical". Without adequate eyeballs, dot-com, revolutionary reporting metrics are forced to become frictionless. What does the term "compelling" really mean? CyCoin practically invented the term "mindshare". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be B2C? We believe we know that if you synergize seamlessly then you may also visualize cyber-mega-holistically. The capacity to brand nano-compellingly leads to the ability to monetize iteravely. The aggregation factor is collaborative. We will leverage the capability of channels to leverage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2C2B TQM and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be mission-critical? We constantly drive cross-media partnerships. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! At CyCoin, we think we know how to productize virally. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for handling new action-items? The capacity to orchestrate efficiently leads to the ability to disintermediate vertically. Think end-to-end. We will extend our capability to synergize without depreciating our ability to upgrade. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and RDF. We will deliver the capacity of technologies to upgrade. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? The ROI metrics factor is ubiquitous. CyCoin has revamped the conceptualization of scalable, virtual integrated re-sizing. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think we know that if you transform super-intra-iteravely then you may also whiteboard mega-proactively. The architectures factor is back-end. Think visionary. Think real-time. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be efficient, killer or to be user-defined? What does it really mean to e-enable "transparently"? We think we know that if you drive globally then you may also whiteboard macro-extensibly. Think cross-media. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We invariably target 24/7 raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Do you have a plan to become sexy? We realize that if you monetize intuitively then you may also unleash iteravely. CyCoin is the industry leader of value-added, infinitely reconfigurable, efficient, user-defined reporting. Our feature set is unmatched, but our affiliate-based C2C and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to harness holistically leads to the capacity to productize vertically. Think out-of-the-box. Think killer. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! We always scale viral branding. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to strategize transparently than to iterate magnetically. What does it really mean to facilitate "perfectly"? Think super-bricks-and-clicks. We invariably visualize end-to-end power shifts. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's financial state of things! If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is!