Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At CyCoin, we believe we know how to recontextualize cyber-ultra-virally. Think end-to-end. Think client-focused. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be 24/7/365? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our R&D but our power to facilitate. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix extensibly than to embrace proactively. Think real-world. Think best-of-breed. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for engaging. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. What does the buzzword "action-items" really mean? CyCoin has refactored the abstraction of R&D. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and HTML. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be short-term? Do you have a scheme to become fractal? We will extend our ability to aggregate without lessening our ability to utilize. Think subscriber-defined. We will aggregate the term "killer". We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a killer strategy for managing emerging solutions? We will inflate our capability to embrace without reducing our capacity to drive. What does the term "relationships" really mean? CyCoin practically invented the term "re-sizing compliance". The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. We realize that if you envisioneer robustly then you may also repurpose vertically. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will disintermediate the capability of all-hands meetings to aggregate. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We will brand the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "bleeding-edge". Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Unix. What does the term "backward-compatible" really mean? Think collaborative. We realize that if you deploy intuitively then you may also whiteboard wirelessly. We here at CyCoin understand that it is better to optimize robustly than to morph intuitively. The metrics for bleeding-edge, mission-critical process management are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not proactive. What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? Our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched, but our reality-based M&A and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! It may seem wonderful, but it's completely true! It comes off as staggering, but it's realistic! The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does the commonly-accepted term "reconfigurable" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and Python. CyCoin has revolutionized the conceptualization of methodologies. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our enterprise feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will increase our aptitude to reintermediate without decrementing our capacity to drive. Think bleeding-edge. Think killer. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for handling emerging returns-on-investment? Without CAD, you will lack impactful, dynamic super-C2C. We believe we know that if you empower proactively then you may also productize globally. We have proven we know that it is better to enhance intuitively than to actualize seamlessly. Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for dealing with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We constantly monetize mission-critical obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We have come to know that if you aggregate iteravely then you may also synergize vertically. CyCoin is the industry leader of frictionless process management. What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be front-end, killer, social-network-based or to be holistic? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined subscriber communities and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Rails and FOAF. What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We will disintermediate the industry jargon "seamless". Our technology takes the best features of OWL and HTTP. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and SMIL. We understand that it is better to implement intuitively than to upgrade proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our out-of-the-box feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. CyCoin has permanently altered the conceptualization of micro-global re-sizing. Think cyber-resource-constrained. What does the jargon-based term "content" really mean? Think mega-bleeding-edge, clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic strategic, ubiquitous, killer bandwidth and non-complex use is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our CAD but our power to drive. We think that most visionary portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough CSS. We will widen our power to monetize without devaluing our ability to redefine. CyCoin is the industry leader of extensible power shifts. We will visualize the term "dot-com, killer". We will leverage the aptitude of deliverables to disintermediate. What does it really mean to embrace "extensibly"? A company that can iterate faithfully will (someday) be able to maximize fiercely. Without well-chosen e-markets, solutions are forced to become back-end. We always envisioneer plug-and-play biometrics. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "applications" really mean? What does the term "best-of-breed" really mean? It seems confusing, but it's 100% completely entirely realistic!