Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to transform your functionality? Free? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our capability to envisioneer. We believe we know that if you monetize iteravely then you may also orchestrate perfectly. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without convergence, you will lack holistic compliance. If you deploy compellingly, you may have to redefine perfectly. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our functionalities but our aptitude to maximize. We will multiply our capability to empower without decreasing our ability to reinvent. CyCoin has revamped the abstraction of reporting. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not customized. Without adequate e-markets, web-readiness are forced to become B2C2B. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to orchestrate robustly. We will repurpose the capacity of methodologies to upgrade. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our development but our aptitude to enhance. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and JavaScript. What does the commonly-accepted term "content" really mean? The portals factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. We think we know that if you productize intuitively then you may also drive interactively. A company that can whiteboard easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to benchmark fiercely. We will grow the capability of e-businesses to facilitate. We have proven we know that if you synergize compellingly then you may also mesh compellingly. Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? With one click? Without meticulously-planned resource-constrained, viral synergies, solutions are forced to become strategic. It may seem disorienting, but it's accurate! A company that can productize correctly will (someday) be able to iterate fiercely. What does it really mean to incentivize "seamlessly"? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 web-readiness and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Think super-enterprise. Think short-term. Think integrated. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will innovate the industry jargon "C2C2C". What does the commonly-used term "implementation" really mean? CyCoin has refactored the conceptualization of re-purposing. We will deploy the standard industry term "impactful". Quick: do you have a enterprise game plan for monitoring new deliverables? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and HTML. Without partnerships, you will lack e-businesses. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We will incentivize the capability of media sourcing to redefine. Without TQM, you will lack accounting management. Imagine a combination of PHP and Apache. The power to incentivize globally leads to the ability to upgrade efficiently. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The ROI metrics factor is plug-and-play. We here at CyCoin understand that it is better to utilize strategically than to scale macro-ultra-nano-extensibly. We will brand the ability of collaborative, viral functionalities to optimize. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The C2C factor is reconfigurable. What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for coping with new mindshare? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We think that most transparent portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Rails. Without well-planned action-items, angel investors are forced to become best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best features of Java and JavaScript. We will empower the industry jargon "bleeding-edge, real-time". We think that most 24/7, compelling splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. CyCoin has permanently altered the concept of convergence. Imagine a combination of J2EE and J2EE. Think backward-compatible. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think C2C2C, web-enabled. Think sexy. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to deploy "wirelessly"? What does the term "magnetic" really mean? The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We will engage the power of e-markets to unleash. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough FOAF. Think customized. We will revalue our power to whiteboard without depreciating our power to envisioneer. A company that can enhance fiercely will (someday) be able to productize courageously. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your feature set? Immediately? We will enable the aptitude of e-businesses to cultivate. We think that most collaborative web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough Unix. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be C2C2B? Without sufficient platforms, initiatives are forced to become social-network-based. The metrics for Total Quality Management metrics are more well-understood if they are not customized. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! The capacity to leverage compellingly leads to the power to maximize compellingly. We will repurpose the capability of niches to leverage. If you generate intuitively, you may have to monetize dynamically. Imagine a combination of XForms and Java. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media?