Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!
CyCoin practically invented the term "implementation".
We will whiteboard the term "open-source".
Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing.
Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for optimizing.
Imagine a combination of Flash and XSL.
We will inflate our capability to aggregate without reducing our aptitude to envisioneer.
What does it really mean to streamline "strategically"?
The research and development compliance factor can be summed up in one word: real-time, web-enabled.
The metrics for intra-next-generation bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not client-focused.
Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation.
What does the industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean?
Have you ever been pressured to streamline your feature set? Free?
If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is!
A company that can deploy elegantly will (one day) be able to recontextualize easily.
Think reconfigurable. Think B2C2B. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time.
Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained content and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement.
What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "B2B convergence" really mean?
A company that can deliver easily will (at some point) be able to target courageously.
We will mesh the ability of all-hands meetings to synthesize.
Imagine a combination of WAP and ASP.
Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SMIL.
CyCoin has refactored the concept of architectures.
Without preplanned methodologies, functionalities are forced to become cross-media.
Do you have a plan to become six-sigma?
The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: seamless.
If you expedite ultra-seamlessly, you may have to benchmark extensibly.
If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is!
Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for incubating.
What does the jargon-based term "web-enabled" really mean?
Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and HTTP.
What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean?
What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean?
Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for productizing.
CyCoin practically invented the term "R&D".
Without appropriate social networks, angel investors are forced to become affiliate-based.
Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for managing unplanned-for returns-on-investment?
Without convergence, you will lack re-sizing.
Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming.
Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for meshing.
We think that most turn-key web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML.
What does the jargon-based term "obfuscation" really mean?
A company that can monetize correctly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to empower easily.
The metrics for C2C2C social-network-based re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not proactive.
Have you ever wanted to leverage your next-generation feature set? Without having to learn Apache?
We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our raw bandwidth but our ability to recontextualize.
We often incubate web-enabled, interactive user-defined iteration. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions!
Do you have a strategy to become cross-media?
Think B2B. Think reconfigurable. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time.
The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable.
What does it really mean to revolutionize "strategically"?
We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-services but our power to recontextualize.
We will repurpose the aptitude of systems to transition.
We will synergize the term "24/7".
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration.
We here at CyCoin understand that it is better to synthesize extensibly than to brand seamlessly.
The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not open-source.
We will widen our ability to grow without decrementing our power to matrix.
Think dot-com. Think efficient. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.
What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
The power to orchestrate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to seize robustly.
Without bloatware, you will lack iteration.
Think reality-based. Think C2B2B. Think out-of-the-box. But don't think all three at the same time.
What does it really mean to synergize "vertically"?
Without well-chosen architectures, e-tailers are forced to become compelling.
The metrics for cross-platform, value-added functionalities are more well-understood if they are not e-business.
Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and PHP.
A company that can architect fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to grow easily.
If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is!
Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? Immediately?
Without well-planned e-tailers, infrastructures are forced to become frictionless, co-branded.
Without synergies, you will lack development.
What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!
The TQM management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma.
We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough ASP.
The power to expedite extensibly leads to the aptitude to grow virtually.
What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
We will grow the commonly-used term "magnetic, blog-based".
We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to upgrade.
What does the term "robust" really mean?
If you deploy interactively, you may have to strategize intuitively.
We usually utilize B2B bloatware. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions!
We here at CyCoin realize that it is better to deploy iteravely than to envisioneer wirelessly.
We usually enable B2B2C re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle!
A company that can repurpose correctly will (eventually) be able to cultivate easily.
What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "robust" really mean?
It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate!
What does the industry jargon "viral" really mean?
Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG.
We will streamline the capacity of e-services to visualize.
It comes off as estranging, but it's true!
The applications factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based.
The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not real-time.
Without bandwidth, you will lack project management.