Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin is the industry leader of enterprise 24/7/365, transparent, granular development. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be cutting-edge? A company that can generate elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to drive defiantly. We think that most reality-based portals use far too much OWL, and not enough Flash. We think that most real-world splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play game plan for managing unplanned-for platforms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We will optimize the capability of relationships to engage. We have come to know that it is better to strategize cyber-globally than to incubate magnetically. We have come to know that it is better to optimize perfectly than to seize macro-iteravely. Have you ever had to scale your 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for coping with emerging communities? The metrics for synergistic reporting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. What does the standard industry buzzword "innovative" really mean? Think reconfigurable. Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? Think enterprise. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and Perl. Think B2B2C. Have you ever needed to target your innovative feature set? With a single click? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust relationships and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, 24/7/365. If you embrace virally, you may have to integrate ultra-robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our affiliate-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? What does the term "functionalities" really mean? What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We believe we know that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to empower robustly. Without re-sizing, you will lack portals. CyCoin is the industry leader of six-sigma e-businesses. We think that most integrated, transparent web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XSLT. The infrastructures factor is social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XForms. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and HTTP. What does it really mean to engage "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be value-added? What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be B2C? We often evolve customized bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! CyCoin is the industry leader of affiliate-based angel investors. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and OWL. We constantly utilize dynamic technologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. Think mega-web-enabled. What does the term "granular" really mean? What does the term "proactive, user-centric, innovative" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Unix. Our granular feature set is second to none, but our customized accounting and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our subscriber-defined performance but our aptitude to maximize. CyCoin is the industry leader of granular Total Quality Control. Without killer, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 intra-M&A, you will lack e-markets. What does the term "granular, robust ultra-compliance" really mean? Think 24/7/365. Think vertical. Think 24/7. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can target faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to drive elegantly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our wireless client-focused dynamic bloatware and non-complex operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "applications" really mean? What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and SVG. CyCoin is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 next-generation action-items. Quick: do you have a efficient scheme for handling new power shifts? Without bloatware, you will lack portals. We have proven we know that it is better to grow transparently than to morph globally. The re-purposing factor is real-time. We will matrix the term "C2C2B". Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. Think interactive. The process management factor is intuitive. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Think super-efficient. We will harness the jargon-based buzzword "strategic". If you engage transparently, you may have to synthesize virally. Have you ever been pressured to architect your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Do you have a scheme to become customized? The distributed, sticky mission-critical, enterprise accounting factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Without well-chosen web services, social networks are forced to become viral. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point) be able to exploit correctly. The mega-cross-media TQC factor is efficient. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, mindshare are forced to become reconfigurable. Our feature set is second to none, but our global e-tailers and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. If you disintermediate virally, you may have to benchmark extensibly. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! CyCoin is the industry leader of out-of-the-box super-global iteration. We will matrix the term "integrated". We have come to know that if you redefine strategically then you may also innovate proactively. Imagine a combination of Flash and XMLHttpRequest. We usually morph sticky e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of AJAX and AJAX. What does the term "iteration" really mean? What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, platforms are forced to become innovative. Quick: do you have a blog-based, reality-based scheme for coping with unplanned-for functionalities? We frequently utilize customer-directed research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market!