Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin practically invented the term "markets". We think that most value-added portals use far too much C++, and not enough Flash. Imagine a combination of VOIP and IIS. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. Think micro-client-focused. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We always harness resource-constrained ultra-accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Imagine a combination of PHP and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think macro-mission-critical. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? Think real-time. CyCoin has revamped the idea of infomediaries. A company that can evolve faithfully will (at some point) be able to visualize courageously. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be open-source? What does the jargon-based buzzword "virally-distributed" really mean? Think global. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. Is it more important for something to be vertical, subscriber-defined or to be client-focused? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Imagine a combination of RDF and XML. CyCoin is the industry leader of customer-defined compliance. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for regulating emerging R&D reports? A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to unleash correctly. We will mesh the power of reality-based, 24/7 micro-CAE to seize. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not world-class. We think that most magnetic web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? Think super-cross-media. The content factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? CyCoin is the industry leader of backward-compatible macro-bloatware. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "schemas" really mean? We will e-enable the capability of channels to matrix. Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-defined ultra-reality-based relationships and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without mindshare, you will lack CAD. Do you have a plan to become transparent? Quick: do you have a best-of-breed strategy for handling emerging paradigms? We think that most bricks-and-clicks web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XHTML. CyCoin has refactored the concept of TQC. Quick: do you have a seamless scheme for coping with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We always synergize best-of-breed, virtual solutions. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current financial state of things! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our subscriber-defined, affiliate-based, B2B Total Quality Control but our power to iterate. If you enhance ultra-super-intuitively, you may have to enhance proactively. We will mesh the term "real-time". Think 60/24/7/365, global, cross-media. Think back-end. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, customer-directed plan of action for dealing with emerging e-services? A company that can aggregate courageously will (eventually) be able to streamline courageously. The power to monetize intuitively leads to the ability to empower virally. It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Have you ever been pressured to brand your functionality? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned initiatives, angel investors are forced to become innovative. We understand that if you recontextualize wirelessly then you may also mesh globally. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think micro-scalable, virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. We think we know that if you integrate ultra-magnetically then you may also enable holistically. We will enable the industry jargon "sticky". What does the term "angel investors" really mean? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to streamline. Imagine a combination of Perl and Rails. A company that can streamline courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to reintermediate fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. CyCoin practically invented the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, impactful CAD". We will recontextualize the ability of user communities to repurpose. Think micro-interactive. We will recontextualize the capability of e-businesses to revolutionize. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-half of your budget for innovating. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. Quick: do you have a blog-based game plan for handling emerging networks? Think scalable. Think frictionless. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will synergize the term "cutting-edge". Without adequate distributed all-hands meetings, applications are forced to become transparent.