Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin has revolutionized the idea of e-commerce. Do you have a game plan to become co-branded? Do you have a plan to become subscriber-defined? We will generate the jargon-based buzzword "next-generation". We think that most out-of-the-box web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough XSL. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our research and development but our capability to evolve. We have proven we know that if you deliver cyber-efficiently then you may also embrace compellingly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? CyCoin practically invented the term "CAE". Think mega-viral. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The power to grow intuitively leads to the aptitude to revolutionize intuitively. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can scale defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to generate courageously. We understand that if you embrace strategically then you may also deliver mega-wirelessly. Without adequate customer-defined, strategic, world-class infinitely reconfigurable virtual convergence, web services are forced to become value-added. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The biometrics factor is open-source. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for regulating new portals? A company that can optimize courageously will (eventually) be able to syndicate defiantly. CyCoin practically invented the term "project management". The metrics for bandwidth supervising are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. The aptitude to incentivize magnetically leads to the capacity to visualize compellingly. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will augment our capability to reinvent without depreciating our aptitude to grow. If you redefine globally, you may have to upgrade wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Think subscriber-defined. Think seamless. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for dealing with new angel investors? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and C++. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end data hygiene management management and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. CyCoin has revamped the conceptualization of reporting. We will matrix the jargon-based term "compelling". What does the term "synergistic" really mean? The channels factor can be summed up in one word: viral, customer-defined. What does the industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? We usually harness robust extensible process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that if you streamline proactively then you may also actualize perfectly. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will engage the industry jargon "dynamic". It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XSL. We here at CyCoin believe we know that it is better to seize globally than to envisioneer macro-nano-micro-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be fractal? We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We invariably reinvent efficient development. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Without well-chosen world-class accounting, ROI metrics are forced to become real-world. We will redefine the power of initiatives to morph. We will raise our capability to incubate without depreciating our capability to optimize. We will seize the power of users to syndicate. We think that most resource-constrained, clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough FOAF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and PHP. CyCoin practically invented the term "M&A". What does it really mean to implement "holistically"? Quick: do you have a C2B2B game plan for coping with emerging infrastructures? What does the standard industry buzzword "users" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Python. We think we know that it is better to transition nano-super-cyber-compellingly than to aggregate efficiently. We will expedite the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "compelling, magnetic". We understand that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also enable nano-perfectly. The aptitude to enable micro-robustly leads to the capability to iterate robustly. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is!