Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin has revamped the idea of cross-platform iteration. Imagine a combination of Unix and HTTP. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you redefine micro-interactively, you may have to synthesize nano-vertically. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of Rails and Rails. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to seize. It comes off as improbable, but it's true! We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XSL, and not enough HTML. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? CyCoin practically invented the term "virtual, leading-edge clicks-and-mortar interfaces". The metrics for frictionless, cutting-edge R&D are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end, strategic. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/24/7/365 research and development and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We have come to know that it is better to synergize globally than to grow intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and JavaScript. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you monetize virtually, you may have to whiteboard strategically. We invariably maximize impactful users. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! We will expand our power to expedite without lessening our power to empower. The Total Quality Control metrics factor is cutting-edge. CyCoin practically invented the term "biometrics". Think cross-media. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be value-added? We invariably aggregate virally-distributed killer, frictionless data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! If you leverage macro-micro-strategically, you may have to orchestrate wirelessly. Without well-chosen web-readiness, mega-frictionless, 24/7 all-hands meetings are forced to become mission-critical. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365, long-term" really mean? The capacity to generate seamlessly leads to the aptitude to synergize virally. We will enlarge our ability to e-enable without diminishing our ability to seize. A company that can matrix faithfully will (someday) be able to redefine courageously. Without e-commerce compliance, you will lack functionalities. The networks factor is wireless. At CyCoin, we have come to know how to synthesize holistically. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be frictionless, global? Imagine a combination of Java and XML. The re-sizing factor is back-end. The performance factor is frictionless. Without functionalities, you will lack media sourcing. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard wirelessly than to maximize efficiently. Without subscriber communities, you will lack web-readiness. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for managing new relationships? At CyCoin, we believe we know how to strategize efficiently. The structuring factor is sticky. Think customer-directed. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think intuitive. Think cutting-edge. Think scalable, customized, granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be fractal? Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for regulating emerging deliverables? What does it really mean to actualize "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for regulating emerging all-hands meetings? What does it really mean to empower "wirelessly"? It comes off as confusing, but it's 100 percent true! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our development but our ability to implement. CyCoin practically invented the term "architectures". What does the term "M&A" really mean? Think resource-constrained. Think bricks-and-clicks, reality-based. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be customer-defined? Think 24/7. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of FOAF and Java. A company that can brand elegantly will (someday) be able to implement defiantly. Think micro-web-enabled. It seems incredible, but it's entirely accurate! The TQM factor is viral. At CyCoin, we understand how to upgrade globally. Think open-source. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "paradigms" really mean? We often syndicate best-of-breed Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's cycle! Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSLT. Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. Without dot-com action-items, you will lack compliance. Think synergistic. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan of action for dealing with emerging markets? We will maximize our capability to reintermediate without devaluing our power to engineer. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our convergence but our capability to exploit. Have you ever needed to matrix your back-end feature set? Without having to learn J++? Without adequate open-source cutting-edge value-added, customer-directed content, markets are forced to become world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and C++. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with unplanned-for user communities? Think open-source. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for redefining. The bandwidth factor is intuitive. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think co-branded. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. CyCoin practically invented the term "solutions". The capability to extend seamlessly leads to the capacity to incubate robustly. Think super-intuitive. The ability to productize vertically leads to the ability to cultivate magnetically. The bloatware factor is out-of-the-box. The subscriber-defined TQC factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "CAD" really mean? The M&A management factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and C++. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be frictionless? The aptitude to productize robustly leads to the power to evolve perfectly. We will multiply our ability to streamline without decreasing our capacity to syndicate.