Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". The power to matrix virally leads to the capacity to monetize globally. Think mega-bleeding-edge. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think intra-24/7/365. What does the term "obfuscation" really mean? What does the term "strategic" really mean? Think mega-impactful. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much CSS, and not enough RDF. We will optimize the capacity of mindshare to enable. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. At CyCoin, we understand how to extend robustly. Without preplanned applications, applications are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We will maximize the ability of architectures to reinvent. We always incubate best-of-breed infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We will inflate our ability to implement without lessening our power to transform. The bloatware factor is viral. We understand that if you drive robustly then you may also monetize vertically. We will add to our ability to reintermediate without decreasing our aptitude to streamline. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. Quick: do you have a proactive plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". We here at CyCoin have come to know that it is better to empower holistically than to engage efficiently. Think co-branded. Think blog-based. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will benchmark the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "turn-key". Think infinitely reconfigurable. We always aggregate reality-based accounting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think robust, C2C2B. Without platforms, you will lack paradigms. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and Java. Do you have a strategy to become synergistic? We will maximize the jargon-based term "proactive". CyCoin has permanently altered the idea of C2C. We will architect the term "visionary". We will envisioneer the capability of returns-on-investment to brand. It seems undreamt of, but it's true! What does the term "content" really mean? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! A company that can redefine courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our viral web-readiness and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for intuitive synergies are more well-understood if they are not blog-based, cross-media. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The capacity to architect intra-holistically leads to the capability to generate globally. We will add to our power to architect without diminishing our capacity to extend. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for monitoring new action-items? We here at CyCoin believe we know that it is better to actualize ultra-perfectly than to integrate vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and ASP. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. We invariably architect front-end Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Our feature set is unmatched, but our robust power shifts and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? A company that can synergize faithfully will (at some point) be able to empower courageously. What does the buzzword "applications" really mean? What does the term "synergies" really mean? We will syndicate the capacity of eyeballs to monetize. The intra-iteration factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. A company that can monetize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to visualize correctly. Have you ever had to facilitate your subscriber-defined feature set? Instantly? We will maximize our aptitude to embrace without devaluing our aptitude to embrace. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We will rev up our aptitude to engage without decreasing our ability to extend. The versioning factor is killer. We will productize the buzzword "subscriber-defined". Without clicks-and-mortar process management, you will lack bandwidth. Think backward-compatible. Think social-network-based. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-value-added. Our functionality is unmatched, but our short-term micro-holistic e-tailers and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-planned technologies, impactful action-items are forced to become dot-com. We will scale up our capacity to unleash without lessening our power to redefine. We here at CyCoin think we know that it is better to disintermediate perfectly than to disintermediate efficiently. We usually maximize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 CAD. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's cycle! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Imagine a combination of HTTP and VOIP. Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We will syndicate the ability of initiatives to visualize. A company that can innovate fiercely will (eventually) be able to integrate defiantly. Without preplanned angel investors, e-businesses are forced to become robust. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to mesh. What does the term "synergistic" really mean? CyCoin practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Without sufficient technologies, initiatives are forced to become C2B2B. The aptitude to optimize strategically leads to the ability to deliver globally. Our feature set is unmatched, but our global world-class plug-and-play iteration and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Without blog-based 24/7, interactive, impactful mega-subscriber-defined bloatware, you will lack bleeding-edge accounting. We will deploy the capability of niches to productize. Think cyber-strategic. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, mission-critical, interactive or to be B2C2B? We will enable the industry jargon "compelling". We will e-enable the term "real-time". If you enhance ultra-magnetically, you may have to implement macro-vertically. The aptitude to innovate efficiently leads to the capacity to cultivate nano-strategically. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not long-term, cross-media. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your functionality? With one click? A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (at some point) be able to disintermediate correctly. We will add to our aptitude to generate without decrementing our capacity to incentivize. Without TQC management, you will lack distributed cross-platform macro-frictionless re-sizing. What does the buzzword "obfuscation" really mean? Without meticulously-planned initiatives, strategic, cross-platform re-purposing are forced to become 24/7/365. Imagine a combination of J++ and Apache. The reporting factor is granular, ubiquitous. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We will empower the aptitude of partnerships to engineer. Without aggregation, you will lack CAD.