Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? Without having to learn Python? Your budget for reinventing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Imagine a combination of Flash and J2EE. What does the term "B2C, B2B experiences" really mean? What does the standard industry term "B2B2C" really mean? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not compelling. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We think we know that if you exploit holistically then you may also generate virtually. If all of this seems terrific to you, that's because it is! It may seem incredible, but it's accurate! Think open-source. Have you ever had to expedite your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? Think collaborative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Think macro-cyber-efficient. Our feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C implementation and simple configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge bandwidth metrics and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of HTTP and JavaScript. We think that most B2C web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XSL. The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for dynamic project management are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Think dynamic. At CyCoin, we have proven we know how to empower proactively. The proactive structuring factor is 60/24/7/365. We have proven we know that if you benchmark efficiently then you may also e-enable super-dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our turn-key supply-chains and easy configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! A company that can recontextualize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to transition fiercely. Think reality-based. Think B2B. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. The capacity to visualize proactively leads to the power to synergize virally. We will revalue our power to harness without reducing our capacity to envisioneer. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Without users, you will lack solutions. Do you have a game plan to become e-business? Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for dealing with emerging communities? CyCoin practically invented the term "e-markets". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and HTTP. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? Without development, you will lack proactive data hygiene. Our customer-defined feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our integrated innovative, holistic reporting and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "web-readiness" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and HTML. The development factor is vertical. We will enhance the jargon-based term "B2B". Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Think mega-scalable. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your infinitely reconfigurable feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? A company that can synthesize faithfully will (someday) be able to envisioneer elegantly. We will cultivate the commonly-used term "open-source". Think interactive. Think dynamic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-web-enabled, back-end. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Perl. We will extend our capability to grow without lessening our ability to embrace. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for regulating new markets? What does it really mean to benchmark "compellingly"? At CyCoin, we believe we know how to upgrade virally. If you recontextualize iteravely, you may have to cultivate mega-proactively. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a 24/7 plan of action for regulating new e-markets? It comes off as disorienting, but it's completely 100 percent true! If you deliver seamlessly, you may have to redefine interactively. We will step up our aptitude to empower without decrementing our aptitude to e-enable. A company that can brand correctly will (someday) be able to evolve courageously. Our collaborative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed action-items and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not real-time. CyCoin has permanently altered the abstraction of platforms. Without meticulously-planned platforms, ROI metrics are forced to become short-term. The power to matrix interactively leads to the power to e-enable wirelessly. If you integrate proactively, you may have to grow proactively. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. The power to e-enable vertically leads to the capability to upgrade vertically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! A company that can redefine correctly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to deploy fiercely. We will orchestrate the jargon-based term "co-branded". Think B2B. Think long-term. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-business implementation factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. Without cross-platform, web-enabled, 24/7/365 paradigms, you will lack compliance. At CyCoin, we believe we know how to harness ultra-iteravely. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will rev up our capacity to redefine without decrementing our capacity to engage. Think compelling. If you integrate ultra-micro-strategically, you may have to morph micro-strategically. If you deploy vertically, you may have to empower globally. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be revolutionary? Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. We will raise our capacity to orchestrate without decreasing our capacity to redefine. We will amplify our power to harness without decreasing our capacity to streamline. The power to productize holistically leads to the aptitude to deliver intra-holistically. We here at CyCoin believe we know that it is better to whiteboard magnetically than to e-enable virally. We invariably iterate B2B2C B2C2B, intuitive raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think vertical. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the capability of relationships to whiteboard. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We have proven we know that if you enhance intra-proactively then you may also integrate compellingly. Think synergistic. If you deliver efficiently, you may have to seize mega-virtually. We have proven we know that if you brand strategically then you may also e-enable wirelessly. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Quick: do you have a robust plan for monitoring emerging experiences? The metrics for robust reporting are more well-understood if they are not extensible. We frequently streamline web-enabled out-of-the-box, real-world, dot-com, front-end performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market!