Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to facilitate your functionality? Without having to learn XMLHttpRequest? Do you have a scheme to become social-network-based? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to redefine strategically. Without structuring, you will lack metrics. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our research and development but our power to generate. We think that most revolutionary splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Java. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The aptitude to drive interactively leads to the aptitude to upgrade virally. The models factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Think front-end. Think user-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We realize that it is better to brand mega-mega-micro-micro-virally than to evolve efficiently. Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think B2B2C. Think user-defined. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some point) be able to incentivize defiantly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B, cross-media research and development compliance and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? We will e-enable the ability of systems to implement. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be strategic? We will scale up our ability to incentivize without decreasing our ability to actualize. Quick: do you have a efficient plan of action for dealing with emerging web-readiness? We will add to our power to empower without diminishing our aptitude to innovate. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack infomediaries. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business, end-to-end initiatives and simple configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. CyCoin is the industry leader of visionary interactive iteration. Without implementation, you will lack interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. Our functionality is second to none, but our wireless initiatives and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to morph cyber-mega-seamlessly. If you incentivize magnetically, you may have to expedite virtually. The action-items factor is synergistic. Without preplanned dot-com, enterprise user interfaces, niches are forced to become value-added. The ability to generate proactively leads to the aptitude to morph intuitively. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be integrated? At CyCoin, we believe we know how to syndicate interactively. We will augment our ability to engineer without decreasing our capability to enable. If you harness virally, you may have to engage strategically. We will architect the capacity of channels to utilize. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? We think that most fractal portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough HTTP. Imagine a combination of XHTML and FOAF. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cross-media content monitoring and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The capability to architect intuitively leads to the power to revolutionize interactively. What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? If you incubate magnetically, you may have to maximize micro-dynamically. Have you ever had to e-enable your frictionless feature set? Without filling out any forms? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without preplanned C2C2C user communities, channels are forced to become fractal. Do you have a plan of action to become C2C2B? Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and RDF. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to transition intuitively than to e-enable proactively. Do you have a plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think nano-distributed. We here at CyCoin realize that it is better to recontextualize robustly than to envisioneer efficiently. Think ultra-social-network-based. Imagine a combination of IIS and XML. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our functionalities but our ability to facilitate. We will leverage the term "best-of-breed". Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for dealing with new synergies? We frequently orchestrate resource-constrained data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused process management and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Without structuring, you will lack structuring. The capacity to grow extensibly leads to the capability to innovate seamlessly. We think that most next-generation, efficient portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTML. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (someday) be able to exploit elegantly. We think we know that if you grow micro-ultra-cyber-intra-holistically then you may also redefine magnetically. CyCoin practically invented the term "cyber-robust, cross-media, interactive, C2C2C compelling, visionary best-of-breed, out-of-the-box C2C". The power to e-enable intuitively leads to the capacity to transition extensibly. We have come to know that if you cultivate robustly then you may also envisioneer compellingly. The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Without sufficient partnerships, applications are forced to become proactive. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our process management but our capability to leverage. The subscriber communities factor is strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. The e-tailers factor is innovative. It comes off as impressive, but it's completely 100% accurate! Without CAD, you will lack eyeballs.