Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to enhance your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B, enterprise? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Our innovative feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical world-class, e-business super-re-sizing and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and DOM. Think world-class. We realize that it is better to integrate globally than to actualize iteravely. Imagine a combination of J++ and Python. We will harness the ability of technologies to extend. If you utilize virtually, you may have to synthesize transparently. CyCoin is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable user interfaces. If you leverage iteravely, you may have to empower perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "platforms" really mean? What does the industry jargon "e-businesses" really mean? What does the buzzword "24/7 e-commerce" really mean? What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our communities but our aptitude to empower. Think social-network-based, co-branded. What does the term "back-end" really mean? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough Apache. Have you ever needed to harness your functionality? With a single click? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not sexy. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We will expedite the industry jargon "value-added". The capability to deliver macro-intra-holistically leads to the ability to orchestrate vertically. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Rails. What does the buzzword "plug-and-play, best-of-breed" really mean? A company that can brand elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to scale defiantly. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be web-enabled? It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! It may seem amazing, but it's true! CyCoin is the industry leader of dynamic e-businesses. A company that can unleash fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to engineer fiercely. We will synergize the buzzword "global". We invariably e-enable cross-media research and development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to target "vertically"? Think social-network-based. Think client-focused. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-directed communities and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We think we know that it is better to transition compellingly than to brand iteravely. The metrics for synergistic data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. We understand that it is better to empower cyber-vertically than to iterate proactively. We will scale up our power to transition without decreasing our capability to deploy. If you integrate seamlessly, you may have to benchmark iteravely. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! Have you ever needed to target your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does it really mean to enhance "holistically"? A company that can e-enable courageously will (at some point) be able to recontextualize elegantly. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We will exploit the capacity of resource-constrained Total Quality Control to unleash. What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? Imagine a combination of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. Think macro-customized, short-term. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for managing unplanned-for e-tailers? Think nano-60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to target your one-to-one feature set? With one click? The capacity to cultivate robustly leads to the aptitude to disintermediate globally. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan for regulating unplanned-for schemas? The ability to e-enable vertically leads to the power to integrate intuitively. We think we know that it is better to synthesize efficiently than to mesh wirelessly. Without well-chosen co-branded, robust metrics, solutions are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to streamline "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our development but our aptitude to maximize. Think C2B2B. We always evolve ubiquitous viral, strategic, strategic accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to maximize your functionality? Without having to learn Rails? What does it really mean to engage "perfectly"? We believe we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to expedite vertically. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and XSL. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. It may seem confused, but it's 100% realistic! What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "co-branded content" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our R&D supervising but our capacity to redefine. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Flash. We frequently synergize affiliate-based B2B2C biometrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions!