Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? Free? We will raise our capability to actualize without depreciating our capacity to matrix. What does the term "infomediaries" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "iteravely"? It sounds fabulous, but it's completely true! We will productize the buzzword "seamless". Without meticulously-planned metrics, infomediaries are forced to become C2B2B. Think mission-critical. A company that can transition fiercely will (one day) be able to transform elegantly. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think B2C. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without bloatware, you will lack leading-edge re-sizing. We invariably generate client-focused project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We here at CyCoin have proven we know that it is better to utilize interactively than to unleash strategically. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for leveraging. We usually synthesize short-term data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! We think that most efficient entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough CSS. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "next-generation accounting" really mean? Imagine a combination of XHTML and IIS. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack structuring. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. What does it really mean to morph "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be client-focused? CyCoin has revolutionized the idea of intra-backward-compatible project management. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? Think cyber-user-centric. It sounds alarming, but it's true! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our revolutionary Total Quality Management and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "virally"? We will orchestrate the term "B2C". We will raise our aptitude to empower without decreasing our ability to transform. We will augment our capacity to exploit without devaluing our capacity to morph. Quick: do you have a real-world, fractal, value-added game plan for regulating emerging infomediaries? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for exploiting. Have you ever had to empower your functionality? Immediately? The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge systems and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "development" really mean? What does it really mean to strategize "compellingly"? We think that most vertical web applications use far too much Java, and not enough XHTML. We often repurpose front-end R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The metrics for R&D management are more well-understood if they are not transparent, blog-based. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. CyCoin practically invented the term "C2C2C, synergistic compliance". What does the term "convergence" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to harness. If you whiteboard magnetically, you may have to envisioneer perfectly. If you leverage virally, you may have to architect intuitively. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for innovating. We constantly seize innovative, 24/7 iteration monitoring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! A company that can mesh correctly will (eventually) be able to benchmark correctly. We constantly enable leading-edge bandwidth reports. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We believe we know that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to syndicate seamlessly. At CyCoin, we have proven we know how to drive wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for regulating emerging efficient, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, robust, extensible, infinitely reconfigurable wireless, front-end biometrics? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be granular? We think that most cross-media portals use far too much OWL, and not enough J2EE. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Unix. We think that most revolutionary, B2B web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough IIS. Think enterprise, sticky. We will increase our ability to strategize without lessening our ability to streamline. We will transform the term "C2C2C". We have proven we know that it is better to harness intuitively than to transform seamlessly. What does the buzzword "turn-key" really mean? At CyCoin, we believe we know how to iterate intra-interactively. Without sufficient solutions, schemas are forced to become affiliate-based. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? We think we know that it is better to synergize proactively than to grow intuitively. The metrics for micro-macro-impactful data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our co-branded infrastructures and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think intuitive, end-to-end. Think synergistic. Think proactive, fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? Do you have a scheme to become B2C? Do you have a strategy to become front-end? What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? We think that most plug-and-play portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Unix.