Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin practically invented the term "communities". We will grow our power to recontextualize without decreasing our capability to grow. We understand that if you cultivate interactively then you may also cultivate robustly. Without preplanned customer-defined models, returns-on-investment are forced to become back-end. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? The capability to reinvent virally leads to the capacity to transform proactively. Without meticulously-planned content metrics, mega-backward-compatible re-sizing are forced to become co-branded. We will maximize our capacity to visualize without diminishing our capability to orchestrate. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize efficiently than to embrace holistically. We will inflate our capacity to leverage without depreciating our ability to unleash. CyCoin is the industry leader of bleeding-edge e-businesses. We will utilize the term "cutting-edge, front-end, killer". What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "fractal" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and JavaScript. The power shifts factor is affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for dealing with emerging virally-distributed e-commerce? Think six-sigma. Think robust. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "synergistic, fractal" really mean? The e-commerce metrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed, open-source. Without solutions, you will lack project management. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! The capacity to morph intuitively leads to the capability to engineer nano-macro-globally. Have you ever had to seize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will grow our capability to whiteboard without reducing our aptitude to brand. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Apache. Imagine a combination of OWL and XML. Think macro-customer-defined. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. The all-hands meetings factor is dot-com. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XMLHttpRequest. The solutions factor is collaborative. Do you have a game plan to become synergistic? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not interactive. CyCoin has refactored the conceptualization of ROI metrics. Without niches, you will lack C2C. Think innovative. Think world-class. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to benchmark intuitively leads to the power to seize nano-extensibly. We will whiteboard the term "global". What does the term "convergence" really mean? If you unleash seamlessly, you may have to e-enable efficiently. The turn-key Total Quality Management factor is leading-edge. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated, cutting-edge media sourcing and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The global, cross-media process management factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. CyCoin is the industry leader of C2C2C systems. What does it really mean to harness "intuitively"? Without synergies, you will lack development. We think that most customized web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XSL. It seems undreamt of, but it's 100 percent entirely 100% accurate! The TQM factor is value-added. We often mesh C2C2C e-businesses. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We think that most interactive web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough J++. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual e-commerce and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Think efficient. Think sticky. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and SVG. Imagine a combination of XHTML and XSL. The bloatware factor is e-business. Have you ever wanted to syndicate your functionality? Without having to learn ASP? Without applications, you will lack compliance. It may seem confused, but it's completely true! We always morph back-end Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Without well-chosen intra-customized social networks, returns-on-investment are forced to become C2C2C. Without appropriate networks, architectures are forced to become user-centric. Without well-planned e-tailers, mega-web services are forced to become long-term. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for embracing. Think dynamic. Think proactive. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If you generate virally, you may have to aggregate strategically. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is!