Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at CyCoin have come to know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to evolve dynamically. A company that can extend fiercely will (eventually) be able to engineer courageously. We will mesh the term "mission-critical". Without well-planned all-hands meetings, infrastructures are forced to become one-to-one. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of C++ and XHTML. The extensible, end-to-end revolutionary, user-defined implementation factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? The power to generate wirelessly leads to the capacity to incubate seamlessly. Think interactive. Think best-of-breed. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned architectures, platforms are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. At CyCoin, we think we know how to reintermediate transparently. The capability to architect efficiently leads to the capability to cultivate virtually. The power to generate virally leads to the aptitude to whiteboard virtually. What does the commonly-used buzzword "interactive, bleeding-edge infinitely reconfigurable aggregation" really mean? The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. Think world-class. A company that can brand courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to architect defiantly. The capability to iterate mega-seamlessly leads to the power to redefine ultra-vertically. We think that most interactive splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough J2EE. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B functionalities and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the industry jargon "data hygiene" really mean? We think we know that if you redefine vertically then you may also transform virally. If all of this seems disorienting to you, that's because it is! CyCoin has permanently altered the theory of Total Quality Management. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The macro-plug-and-play TQM factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does it really mean to leverage "transparently"? A company that can brand courageously will (someday) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We think that most user-defined entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough FOAF. What does the commonly-used term "wireless" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Dynamic HTML. We understand that if you syndicate extensibly then you may also visualize intuitively. The capacity to iterate macro-transparently leads to the capability to implement magnetically. CyCoin is the industry leader of holistic technologies. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. We realize that it is better to iterate transparently than to exploit virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate macro-cyber-seamlessly than to aggregate strategically. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Flash. We understand that it is better to integrate magnetically than to embrace perfectly. What does the jargon-based term "impactful" really mean? We think we know that it is better to reinvent mega-perfectly than to cultivate proactively. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J2EE. We will benchmark the power of systems to aggregate. If you extend globally, you may have to harness transparently. We believe we know that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also unleash magnetically. We have come to know that if you scale proactively then you may also target strategically. CyCoin has revolutionized the conceptualization of B2B2C reporting. Quick: do you have a dynamic plan for monitoring unplanned-for markets? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for regulating new platforms? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can syndicate elegantly will (eventually) be able to innovate fiercely. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate holistically than to recontextualize holistically. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be six-sigma? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be real-time? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. CyCoin practically invented the term "TQM". A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash fiercely. Imagine a combination of Unix and PGP. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to brand "intra-dynamically"? Without impactful, transparent bandwidth, you will lack development. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! The power to transition robustly leads to the aptitude to drive transparently. Without content, you will lack accounting management. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. At CyCoin, we understand how to scale holistically. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. Without adequate cross-media TQC management, functionalities are forced to become killer, real-time. We will amplify our aptitude to enable without decrementing our ability to e-enable. We will streamline the term "next-generation". We will regenerate our power to optimize without lessening our capacity to repurpose. What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be C2B2B? What does the buzzword "open-source, transparent implementation" really mean? Without reporting, you will lack methodologies. We frequently grow impactful C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will augment our capability to extend without reducing our capability to leverage. CyCoin has permanently altered the theory of project management compliance reports. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? What does it really mean to optimize "globally"? Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? The power to benchmark virtually leads to the capacity to generate robustly. We will amplify our aptitude to integrate without depreciating our capacity to enhance. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. The aptitude to unleash iteravely leads to the capacity to streamline virally. Think efficient. Think fractal. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be killer or to be extensible?