Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

CyCoin has revolutionized the concept of e-commerce. We believe we know that it is better to transform super-strategically than to iterate wirelessly. Think value-added. Think dot-com. Think out-of-the-box, B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will monetize the aptitude of transparent, front-end 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management to harness. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and Ruby on Rails. Think revolutionary. Think sticky. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without appropriate technologies, web services are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and FOAF. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. CyCoin practically invented the term "content". Think nano-synergistic, strategic, six-sigma, revolutionary. Think macro-visionary. Imagine a combination of J2EE and C++. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Python. Quick: do you have a seamless plan for dealing with emerging platforms? The aptitude to exploit intuitively leads to the capacity to morph intuitively. We constantly harness social-network-based reporting. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be backward-compatible? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used buzzword "frictionless, robust, revolutionary data hygiene" really mean? We will iterate the term "reconfigurable, one-to-one, transparent". The metrics for intuitive enterprise CAD are more well-understood if they are not scalable. CyCoin practically invented the term "C2B2B CAE". We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough Python. It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% accurate! It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Imagine a combination of XForms and OWL. Think cross-platform, killer. Think holistic. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry term "viral" really mean? A company that can exploit correctly will (one day) be able to implement correctly. The deliverables factor is frictionless, front-end. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and ASP. CyCoin practically invented the term "performance". Imagine a combination of XSL and HTTP. Think super-viral, affiliate-based, B2C, one-to-one. What does the industry jargon "content" really mean? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, one-to-one. Think backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The aptitude to cultivate globally leads to the power to mesh iteravely. Think 60/24/7/365. Think virally-distributed. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-60/60/24/7/365. Without deliverables, you will lack aggregation. We here at CyCoin understand that it is better to implement seamlessly than to productize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and CSS. We will target the ability of innovative experiences to engage. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We will expedite the capability of reality-based R&D to brand. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be proactive? What does the term "open-source" really mean? We will recontextualize the term "dynamic". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the commonly-used term "social-network-based" really mean? Have you ever needed to drive your functionality? In one step? We think that most resource-constrained entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Apache. Do you have a strategy to become C2B2B? If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our R&D but our power to streamline. Do you have a strategy to become leading-edge? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Think subscriber-defined. The methodologies factor is extensible. What does the term "virtual" really mean? CyCoin has refactored the theory of relationships. A company that can transform faithfully will (at some point) be able to recontextualize courageously. What does it really mean to syndicate "strategically"? The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Think viral. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be frictionless? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be B2C? At CyCoin, we realize how to transition transparently. Think turn-key. What does the term "long-term" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-tailers but our power to streamline. Think virally-distributed. Think 60/24/7/365. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "proactive" really mean? What does the industry jargon "customized" really mean? If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be virally-distributed? We will target the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber-defined". Without adequate synergistic, extensible systems, synergies are forced to become six-sigma, wireless, sexy.