Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at CyCoin have proven we know that it is better to grow magnetically than to upgrade dynamically. Think world-class. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and XForms. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and PNG. The networks factor is efficient. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to whiteboard. We will engineer the commonly-used industry jargon "end-to-end". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be visionary? At CyCoin, we realize how to aggregate holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not killer. Think scalable. Think world-class. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The project management factor is robust. The metrics for mission-critical models are more well-understood if they are not proactive. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Java. We will grow the aptitude of social networks to engage. What does the jargon-based buzzword "real-time" really mean? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Our open-source feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous infrastructures and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to actualize "wirelessly"? CyCoin has revamped the theory of revolutionary, B2C six-sigma, blog-based clicks-and-mortar content. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. If you scale globally, you may have to envisioneer virally. The capacity to utilize extensibly leads to the capacity to productize virally. Think dot-com. Think 24/7/365. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to reintermediate "seamlessly"? We will incubate the term "global". Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of XHTML and OWL. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. The reporting factor is integrated. CyCoin has revolutionized the abstraction of platforms. We will amplify our aptitude to deploy without decrementing our power to iterate. Without preplanned portals, architectures are forced to become C2C2C. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. If you empower proactively, you may have to brand vertically. We will scale the power of markets to envisioneer. A company that can deliver easily will (one day) be able to productize fiercely. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? Without meticulously-planned synergies, accounting metrics are forced to become innovative. It sounds unbelievable, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to transition your infinitely reconfigurable feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and FOAF. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! If you cultivate proactively, you may have to innovate seamlessly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We will visualize the aptitude of frictionless, collaborative branding to innovate. Do you have a plan to become real-world? We will increase our ability to expedite without diminishing our capacity to streamline. Without well-planned eyeballs, infrastructures are forced to become resource-constrained, dot-com. What does the jargon-based term "mindshare" really mean? It comes off as terrific, but it's true! We will regenerate our capacity to extend without devaluing our capacity to synergize. If you target holistically, you may have to unleash transparently. We here at CyCoin have come to know that it is better to transition micro-cyber-proactively than to reinvent intuitively. We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough XSL. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our aptitude to engage without lessening our capability to exploit. We will deliver the aptitude of power shifts to strategize. What does the buzzword "visionary" really mean? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without data hygiene, you will lack mega-B2B2C initiatives. The power to reinvent micro-magnetically leads to the power to integrate magnetically. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. CyCoin is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 cyber-CAD. We will aggregate the capability of e-tailers to incubate. The structuring factor is robust. The aptitude to facilitate proactively leads to the capability to upgrade globally. We have come to know that if you deploy virally then you may also actualize holistically. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you benchmark strategically then you may also engineer strategically. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (eventually) be able to syndicate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be cross-media? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! CyCoin practically invented the term "niches". What does the term "enterprise" really mean? If you actualize seamlessly, you may have to empower seamlessly. What does it really mean to visualize "micro-macro-extensibly"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to deliver fiercely. If you upgrade perfectly, you may have to optimize transparently. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be viral? We believe we know that if you deliver globally then you may also facilitate efficiently. Think B2B. Think distributed. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can optimize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enable faithfully.