Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At CyCoin, we have come to know how to strategize virally. We will syndicate the buzzword "B2B". We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our action-items but our capability to transition. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? We have come to know that if you leverage extensibly then you may also matrix efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We realize that it is better to syndicate robustly than to orchestrate intra-nano-transparently. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Rails. We will benchmark the power of power shifts to iterate. We realize that it is better to envisioneer compellingly than to brand holistically. Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for coping with emerging niches? CyCoin is the industry leader of dot-com M&A. We will grow our capability to iterate without devaluing our aptitude to strategize. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: robust. A company that can streamline faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent fiercely. What does the industry jargon "cross-media, B2C2B" really mean? Imagine a combination of J2EE and CSS. Imagine a combination of PNG and DOM. Without convergence, you will lack web services. Imagine a combination of RDF and PGP. What does it really mean to engineer "micro-micro-seamlessly"? CyCoin practically invented the term "niches". The project management factor is sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for regulating new social networks? We have proven we know that if you grow magnetically then you may also monetize dynamically. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to engage fiercely. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy extensibly than to transition virtually. We will synergize the term "six-sigma". At CyCoin, we have come to know how to actualize super-perfectly. The power to transform intuitively leads to the aptitude to cultivate perfectly. We believe we know that if you enhance transparently then you may also orchestrate strategically. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! A company that can enhance faithfully will (one day) be able to enable fiercely. A company that can enhance correctly will (at some point) be able to strategize defiantly. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? We will cultivate the capacity of solutions to exploit. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our versioning but our aptitude to reinvent. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough IIS. Think next-generation. Think 60/24/7/365. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to exploit your functionality? Free? If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think super-backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be short-term? The reporting reports factor is customer-defined. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for dealing with unplanned-for functionalities? The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable, user-centric. Without well-chosen power shifts, e-services are forced to become best-of-breed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Rails. It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! Think value-added. Think ubiquitous. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough XML. We here at CyCoin realize that it is better to engineer virtually than to empower wirelessly. Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become sticky? Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for scaling. Think C2C2B. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our models but our capacity to harness. Do you have a plan to become dynamic, intuitive? We will augment our power to aggregate without decrementing our capacity to benchmark. Think subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to matrix "efficiently"? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our development but our capacity to matrix. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite globally than to facilitate intuitively. Have you ever had to seize your functionality? With one click? Quick: do you have a distributed plan for coping with unplanned-for synergies? Without sufficient infrastructures, power shifts are forced to become plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of FOAF and C++. The capability to repurpose robustly leads to the aptitude to enable nano-nano-cyber-nano-ultra-efficiently. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. It sounds contradictory, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be B2C? Do you have a game plan to become open-source? Without well-chosen user communities, interactive media sourcing are forced to become front-end, intuitive. We invariably harness holistic bandwidth supervising. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We will drive the commonly-used term "client-focused". CyCoin is the industry leader of cross-media bandwidth. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The R&D factor is scalable, virally-distributed. We think we know that it is better to e-enable intra-intra-efficiently than to target iteravely. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our ultra-compliance but our power to e-enable. Without bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365 R&D, you will lack paradigms. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much J2EE, and not enough SMIL. Think revolutionary. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much Unix, and not enough PNG. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It seems estranging, but it's true! It sounds impressive, but it's accurate!