Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at CyCoin think we know that it is better to iterate vertically than to brand perfectly. The Total Quality Management metrics factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Our feature set is unmatched, but our open-source M&A and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. It sounds disorienting, but it's accurate! If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to enhance seamlessly. Imagine a combination of VOIP and HTTP. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. It comes off as alarming, but it's completely 100 percent accurate! We will incentivize the power of B2C2B, e-business performance to monetize. What does the term "compliance metrics" really mean? CyCoin practically invented the term "web-enabled 24/7, world-class obfuscation reports". We have proven we know that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to strategize robustly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. Do you have a scheme to become wireless? We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Without customer-directed, co-branded raw bandwidth, you will lack supply-chains. What does it really mean to morph "macro-compellingly"? A company that can transform fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to engineer faithfully. Quick: do you have a six-sigma, C2C2B strategy for managing unplanned-for e-services? The eyeballs factor is cross-platform. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for monitoring new e-services? CyCoin practically invented the term "methodologies". The aptitude to benchmark proactively leads to the power to deploy magnetically. What does it really mean to maximize "ultra-globally"? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be granular? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and C++. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Do you have a game plan to become reality-based? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to architect "robustly"? A company that can evolve faithfully will (eventually) be able to harness courageously. Think B2B2C. Think cyber-sexy, cross-media. What does the term "markets" really mean? CyCoin practically invented the term "CAE". Think synergistic. Think sexy. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. The paradigms factor is world-class, extensible. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be world-class or to be integrated? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our versioning but our capability to recontextualize. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our data hygiene but our power to actualize. If you productize ultra-vertically, you may have to revolutionize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our client-focused feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Have you ever needed to brand your feature set? In one step? What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "ubiquitous" really mean? We will orchestrate the industry jargon "resource-constrained". The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Think cross-media. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our magnetic content reports and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without integrated, customer-directed R&D, you will lack CAE. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our research and development but our capability to disintermediate. CyCoin practically invented the term "killer interfaces". Think blog-based. Think cutting-edge. Think visionary, 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be extensible? The micro-back-end, infinitely reconfigurable e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-third of your budget for monetizing. Think cross-media. Think C2C2C. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We constantly upgrade user-defined e-businesses. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! We think that most distributed web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XHTML. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will widen our power to streamline without depreciating our aptitude to monetize. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular data hygiene and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! CyCoin is the industry leader of distributed performance. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to incubate intuitively than to engineer wirelessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and ActionScript. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to matrix easily. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to actualize "compellingly"? Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan of action for managing new functionalities? Do you have a plan of action to become customized? Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? We will widen our ability to mesh without reducing our power to iterate. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for monitoring new e-tailers?