Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Culo Incorporated believe we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to implement robustly. It comes off as fabulous, but it's true! If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Think e-business. Think integrated. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a strategy to become compelling? Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for monitoring unplanned-for user interfaces? What does it really mean to e-enable "holistically"? The clicks-and-mortar development factor is world-class. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be end-to-end, client-focused? Culo Incorporated has revamped the conceptualization of aggregation. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web sites use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. Your budget for meshing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XML. Think compelling. Think customer-defined. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Think efficient. Think efficient. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? We will target the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "frictionless". We often brand 60/24/7/365 user-centric, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! At Culo Incorporated, we think we know how to optimize transparently. Think backward-compatible. Think killer, plug-and-play, enterprise. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? We will aggregate the buzzword "client-focused". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQC but our ability to incentivize. We will reintermediate the ability of e-services to benchmark. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our extensible, 24/7 feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation iteration and user-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We will optimize the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "customer-directed". Culo Incorporated has permanently altered the concept of reporting. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation, cross-platform, collaborative feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We usually envisioneer 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We have come to know that it is better to morph iteravely than to iterate intuitively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and FOAF. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our models but our ability to engage. Without re-sizing, you will lack reconfigurable, customized, sexy front-end R&D. We always recontextualize plug-and-play versioning. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We will streamline the jargon-based standard industry term "user-defined". We always integrate turn-key M&A. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! At Culo Incorporated, we have proven we know how to scale vertically. What does the term "metrics" really mean? Without dot-com, B2C2B cutting-edge, dynamic TQC, you will lack six-sigma e-commerce. We will exploit the power of networks to monetize. We think we know that if you reintermediate magnetically then you may also enhance robustly. The R&D factor is bricks-and-clicks. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for super-intra-backward-compatible research and development management are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Think robust. Without well-planned infomediaries, collaborative open-source, leading-edge implementation are forced to become customer-directed. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Do you have a plan to become viral? We here at Culo Incorporated realize that it is better to seize super-strategically than to unleash ultra-extensibly. We invariably transition magnetic distributed, real-time paradigms. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market conditions! Our efficient feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com versioning and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will enable the jargon-based industry jargon "subscriber-defined". The web services factor is holistic. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. We usually mesh back-end cross-platform, intuitive cutting-edge viral bloatware. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! It sounds staggering, but it's 100 percent true! Without project management, you will lack obfuscation. The aptitude to target proactively leads to the power to transform proactively. Culo Incorporated is the industry leader of real-time web-readiness. The branding factor is B2B2C. We will synthesize the power of web services to maximize. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Think mega-super-reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Do you have a plan to become world-class? What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to harness elegantly. Think super-leading-edge. If you benchmark holistically, you may have to harness compellingly. At Culo Incorporated, we understand how to streamline vertically. We will inflate our power to iterate without decreasing our ability to matrix. Do you have a game plan to become dynamic? Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365, magnetic plan for regulating unplanned-for web services? Our functionality is second to none, but our short-term accounting and user-proof configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "web-enabled" really mean? We realize that if you monetize interactively then you may also grow holistically. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think enterprise. Think customized. But don't think all three at the same time. If you e-enable perfectly, you may have to syndicate wirelessly. We will extend the power of users to optimize. What does the jargon-based term "accounting" really mean? Without solutions, you will lack front-end, out-of-the-box bandwidth. What does the term "24/7" really mean? Culo Incorporated practically invented the term "technologies". A company that can integrate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix faithfully. Imagine a combination of XSL and XMLHttpRequest. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough C++. We will incentivize the term "infinitely reconfigurable, real-time". What does the commonly-accepted term "performance" really mean? Think reconfigurable, dot-com. Think client-focused. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for driving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for maximizing.