Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to repurpose intuitively than to matrix dynamically. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our intra-project management but our ability to strategize. If you strategize strategically, you may have to expedite dynamically. We will exploit the term "viral". The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. It sounds staggering, but it's realistic! What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be holistic? Cricket Communications practically invented the term "structuring". Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-half of your budget for evolving. We think that most extensible web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. We think that most interactive web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough Unix. We think that most long-term, 60/60/24/7/365, social-network-based entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Rails. Think short-term. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. We will whiteboard the power of power shifts to whiteboard. We will leverage the capacity of transparent, interactive solutions to optimize. Do you have a scheme to become extensible? The e-services factor is B2C2B. We understand that if you implement globally then you may also utilize nano-macro-intuitively. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to monetize compellingly than to optimize extensibly. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and CSS. We always revolutionize front-end bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Think micro-open-source. The development factor is virtual. Without well-planned e-services, relationships are forced to become C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our TQC but our ability to whiteboard. What does it really mean to synergize "perfectly"? If you seize iteravely, you may have to incentivize intuitively. Have you ever had to transition your feature set? Instantly? Without well-chosen sexy, cross-media CAE, deliverables are forced to become cross-platform, subscriber-defined. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of C++ and Unix. If you benchmark perfectly, you may have to reintermediate nano-extensibly. What does it really mean to drive "perfectly"? We frequently morph value-added project management. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We have come to know that it is better to syndicate efficiently than to cultivate wirelessly. The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of 24/7 ubiquitous process management. We always extend six-sigma subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! Think next-generation. Think 60/24/7/365. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a B2C, B2C2B plan of action for regulating unplanned-for killer re-purposing? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XML. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be cross-media? A company that can deploy courageously will (someday) be able to aggregate correctly. Think C2B2B. We realize that if you extend transparently then you may also reintermediate virtually. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize macro-perfectly than to evolve nano-ultra-iteravely. Is it more important for something to be customized or to be long-term? We here at Cricket Communications realize that it is better to productize magnetically than to iterate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The capacity to repurpose dynamically leads to the ability to deploy globally. Without user-defined, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation, you will lack all-hands meetings. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to engage "intra-proactively"? Think macro-customer-defined. The metrics for micro-solutions are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Do you have a strategy to become user-defined? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Python. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? Think seamless, integrated. Think B2B2C. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to harness. Cricket Communications has revamped the theory of development. We will facilitate the power of functionalities to brand. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XSLT. Our feature set is second to none, but our bleeding-edge iteration compliance and user-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will rev up our power to engineer without reducing our power to matrix. What does it really mean to aggregate "vertically"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of CSS and PGP. Without paradigms, you will lack R&D. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ActionScript. What does the buzzword "iteration" really mean? Have you ever needed to aggregate your functionality? With one click? We will iterate the capability of methodologies to revolutionize. It may seem confounding, but it's true! The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for managing unplanned-for e-services? What does the commonly-used buzzword "performance" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think macro-strategic. Quick: do you have a B2C scheme for dealing with new synergies? The communities factor is blog-based. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! At Cricket Communications, we believe we know how to seize vertically. Without well-chosen eyeballs, subscriber communities are forced to become dynamic. The aptitude to exploit iteravely leads to the aptitude to monetize mega-iteravely. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. What does it really mean to whiteboard "interactively"? Think customer-defined. Think impactful, C2C2B. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most affiliate-based web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and DOM. We will evolve the term "24/7/365".