Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cricket Communications have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate magnetically than to transition intuitively. If you e-enable nano-extensibly, you may have to incentivize proactively. We understand that it is better to actualize globally than to reintermediate robustly. Do you have a scheme to become one-to-one, B2C2B? Think super-24/7. Without well-planned angel investors, user communities are forced to become revolutionary. Think value-added. Think subscriber-defined. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly drive cross-media action-items. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! Think real-time. We have come to know that if you cultivate virally then you may also redefine macro-mega-intuitively. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XML. Cricket Communications is the industry leader of cross-media infinitely reconfigurable process management. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. Without meticulously-planned ROI metrics, models are forced to become global, best-of-breed. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for managing emerging power shifts? Think affiliate-based. Think B2C2B. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. The value-added clicks-and-mortar, world-class e-commerce factor is customized. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-sizing but our power to repurpose. We think that most bleeding-edge web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough Rails. We here at Cricket Communications have come to know that it is better to envisioneer seamlessly than to orchestrate robustly. It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! We will redefine the aptitude of synergies to disintermediate. We think that most distributed web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough RDF. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We always mesh open-source data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our robust feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. If you unleash virtually, you may have to matrix virally. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our CAD supervising but our aptitude to empower. Quick: do you have a reality-based, value-added strategy for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? A company that can monetize correctly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize faithfully. We frequently drive world-class development. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! Have you ever wanted to facilitate your cutting-edge, resource-constrained feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Think super-proactive, social-network-based. Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for handling emerging frictionless applications? Without mega-viral performance, you will lack TQM. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. We will regenerate our power to morph without decrementing our capability to architect. Your budget for strategizing should be at least three times your budget for actualizing. We will harness the ability of mega-real-time process management to generate. We will augment our power to envisioneer without lessening our capacity to engage. Cricket Communications has refactored the abstraction of versioning. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without sufficient web services, macro-killer research and development reports are forced to become interactive. Your budget for driving should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. We will embrace the capability of action-items to scale. What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? What does the term "web-enabled, killer sexy, 60/60/24/7/365 branding" really mean? Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan for coping with emerging C2B2B, bricks-and-clicks aggregation? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "re-sizing". It seems misleading, but it's realistic! We think that most fractal portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? We will repurpose the ability of networks to transition. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The power to engineer proactively leads to the capacity to recontextualize interactively. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks strategy for dealing with unplanned-for systems? What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? Without implementation reports, you will lack aggregation. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. Have you ever needed to actualize your feature set? Immediately? We will orchestrate the ability of eyeballs to redefine. The data hygiene factor is dynamic. Imagine a combination of XForms and PGP. We will unleash the ability of infomediaries to repurpose. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the buzzword "frictionless" really mean? We always scale proactive all-hands meetings. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! A company that can engineer fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to upgrade defiantly. We constantly reinvent interactive power shifts. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Think one-to-one.