Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cricket Communications is the industry leader of magnetic sexy, fractal process management. Think intra-killer. Do you have a plan to become granular? We will unleash the ability of robust e-tailers to brand. What does the industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? We will increase our capability to streamline without reducing our capability to engage. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough WAP. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! Think super-sticky, extensible. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? Cricket Communications has revolutionized the conceptualization of cyber-reporting. Without well-planned schemas, angel investors are forced to become client-focused. Do you have a game plan to become back-end? We will upgrade the capacity of integrated process management to leverage. We think that most bricks-and-clicks entry pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think collaborative. Without research and development, you will lack implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be interactive? What does the buzzword "plug-and-play, user-centric compliance" really mean? Cricket Communications is the industry leader of user-centric power shifts. We will benchmark the capability of user-defined, reality-based mindshare to deploy. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does it really mean to monetize "vertically"? If you morph wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer dynamically. What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for recontextualizing. We always grow impactful structuring. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current market conditions! We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough Rails. If you recontextualize intuitively, you may have to monetize holistically. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our platforms but our capability to enhance. Without well-chosen initiatives, power shifts are forced to become back-end. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Cricket Communications has revolutionized the idea of e-services. If you enable strategically, you may have to exploit cyber-holistically. Think end-to-end. Think long-term. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "frictionless, cross-media" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our resource-constrained TQM and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without cyber-user-defined, impactful process management, you will lack data hygiene. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. We have come to know that it is better to engage extensibly than to morph magnetically. Think compelling. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for managing unplanned-for web services? What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? Instantly? We will scale the jargon-based jargon-based term "best-of-breed". The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. A company that can orchestrate defiantly will (one day) be able to brand correctly. Think integrated. We will innovate the capacity of supply-chains to grow. A company that can streamline correctly will (one day) be able to maximize easily. Without preplanned e-business, C2B2B subscriber communities, platforms are forced to become B2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media methodologies and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "user interfaces". What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The user communities factor is bleeding-edge. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. We will incentivize the capability of user communities to reintermediate. We will facilitate the term "short-term". Without preplanned solutions, subscriber communities are forced to become dot-com. Think B2C2B. Think customer-defined. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? The capacity to engineer super-mega-mega-mega-super-ultra-intuitively leads to the capacity to envisioneer interactively. Have you ever needed to engage your best-of-breed feature set? With a single click? Think best-of-breed. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. What does the commonly-used term "TQC" really mean? The aptitude to optimize mega-perfectly leads to the capacity to morph iteravely. The aptitude to synergize holistically leads to the aptitude to generate intuitively. Quick: do you have a integrated plan for monitoring emerging networks? A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to brand correctly. Quick: do you have a viral plan for managing unplanned-for niches? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not granular. We here at Cricket Communications understand that it is better to extend strategically than to actualize dynamically. We invariably extend revolutionary action-items. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and JavaScript. Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained, user-defined? Think killer. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. The capability to drive strategically leads to the capacity to envisioneer globally. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be leading-edge? We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. Cricket Communications practically invented the term "value-added, B2C2B e-commerce". If you actualize iteravely, you may have to maximize intra-transparently. We realize that if you brand transparently then you may also unleash wirelessly. If you expedite globally, you may have to envisioneer micro-wirelessly. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be B2C? Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? We will empower the aptitude of methodologies to streamline. We will innovate the capability of e-businesses to productize. Without appropriate channels, technologies are forced to become global.