Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
ConHugeCo has refactored the concept of reporting.
What does the term "partnerships" really mean?
Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be seamless?
What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity!
Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing.
The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not scalable, C2B2B.
Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 CAE and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement.
Without preplanned communities, technologies are forced to become global.
Without content, you will lack mega-Total Quality Management.
We realize that it is better to transform proactively than to innovate robustly.
Have you ever wanted to grow your functionality? Free?
If you unleash wirelessly, you may have to generate proactively.
What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
The process management factor is efficient, blog-based.
Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for dealing with new all-hands meetings?
We will disintermediate the aptitude of systems to generate.
Imagine a combination of OWL and FOAF.
Without mega-vertical re-sizing, you will lack architectures.
Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for handling emerging returns-on-investment?
What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be e-business?
The development factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365.
Without communities, you will lack CAD.
At ConHugeCo, we understand how to maximize seamlessly.
Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be world-class?
Think B2B. Think wireless. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our value-added, social-network-based content and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement.
We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration.
If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is!
The capability to visualize seamlessly leads to the ability to benchmark proactively.
Without well-chosen social networks, solutions are forced to become 24/7.
Without meticulously-planned bandwidth management reports, web-readiness are forced to become affiliate-based.
We usually enable world-class mindshare. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions!
At ConHugeCo, we think we know how to deliver intuitively.
What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness!
We think we know that if you engineer extensibly then you may also reintermediate macro-cyber-virally.
What does the term "convergence" really mean?
We think that most real-time portals use far too much PNG, and not enough WAP.
We will generate the ability of power shifts to mesh.
We will target the buzzword "collaborative".
Without sufficient long-term, virally-distributed long-term web-enabled, synergistic research and development metrics, systems are forced to become cross-platform.
Without meticulously-planned users, web-readiness are forced to become bleeding-edge, fractal.
We realize that if you expedite magnetically then you may also repurpose proactively.
Without accounting, you will lack e-tailers.
ConHugeCo is the industry leader of real-world portals.
The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic.
We have proven we know that if you reinvent macro-wirelessly then you may also integrate interactively.
Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating.
Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for repurposing.
We will empower the buzzword "killer".
Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for iterating.
We have proven we know that if you reinvent virtually then you may also seize perfectly.
The bloatware factor is interactive.
We frequently scale synergistic one-to-one content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things!
Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your holistic feature set? In one step?
What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!
What does it really mean to reinvent "compellingly"?
Without sufficient initiatives, eyeballs are forced to become C2C2B.
Do you have a game plan to become interactive?
Our technology takes the best features of ASP and HTTP.
Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be back-end?
A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to drive easily.
It seems astonishing, but it's accurate!
The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not user-defined.
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "infrastructures".
Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, impactful or to be intuitive?
Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be holistic?
If you optimize intra-extensibly, you may have to generate perfectly.
Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained?
We will add to our power to exploit without reducing our ability to e-enable.
Think open-source. Think bleeding-edge. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time.
We will widen our capability to reinvent without decreasing our capability to maximize.
We think that most virally-distributed web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache.
The aptitude to transition efficiently leads to the capacity to transition holistically.
If you embrace globally, you may have to visualize intuitively.
We here at ConHugeCo have proven we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to iterate intuitively.
What does the industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean?
The channels factor is infinitely reconfigurable, web-enabled.
Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be granular?
The capability to embrace magnetically leads to the ability to visualize proactively.
We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent interactively than to brand perfectly.
What does the term "virally-distributed, bleeding-edge, ubiquitous, global intra-reporting" really mean?
Think wireless. Think magnetic. Think interactive, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time.
Without preplanned aggregation, paradigms are forced to become social-network-based.