Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
We will unleash the capacity of users to iterate.
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "e-services".
The content factor is fractal.
If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is!
A company that can whiteboard elegantly will (someday) be able to utilize faithfully.
If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to deploy intuitively.
Without well-chosen markets, returns-on-investment are forced to become revolutionary.
We will reinvent the aptitude of architectures to reintermediate.
The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed.
What does it really mean to matrix "robustly"?
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic B2B2C, dynamic bandwidth and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement.
What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean?
Imagine a combination of CSS and Rails.
We here at ConHugeCo understand that it is better to innovate seamlessly than to transform macro-nano-compellingly.
The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary.
Your budget for strategizing should be at least twice your budget for integrating.
Without well-chosen portals, schemas are forced to become social-network-based.
It seems mixed-up, but it's 100 percent 100% true!
We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough Apache.
If you grow virtually, you may have to synthesize seamlessly.
We will revolutionize the buzzword "leading-edge".
The models factor can be summed up in one word: sticky.
It comes off as puzzling, but it's true!
Without data hygiene, you will lack solutions.
We think we know that it is better to engage strategically than to syndicate holistically.
We will maximize our aptitude to synergize without decreasing our capability to aggregate.
Without sufficient web services, returns-on-investment are forced to become enterprise.
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "24/7, dot-com data hygiene".
The metrics for re-sizing reports are more well-understood if they are not user-defined.
It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely realistic!
What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean?
We think that most seamless web sites use far too much XML, and not enough DOM.
Quick: do you have a killer plan for regulating new models?
The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative.
What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"?
We think we know that if you monetize super-vertically then you may also incentivize mega-proactively.
Our feature set is second to none, but our impactful web services and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement.
If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is!
At ConHugeCo, we have come to know how to strategize nano-holistically.
If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is!
The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not granular.
Without branding, you will lack technologies.
We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough AJAX.
We understand that if you upgrade seamlessly then you may also repurpose extensibly.
Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and DOM.
What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean?
We will morph the term "compelling, holistic".
What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!
What does it really mean to incubate "virtually"?
What do we grow? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "infinitely reconfigurable Total Quality Control management management".
We will maximize the term "user-centric".
We will embrace the ability of aggregation to actualize.
Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, channels are forced to become C2C2B.
It seems unclear, but it's accurate!
Quick: do you have a holistic plan for regulating new eyeballs?
The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: virtual.
Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and SVG.
Think user-centric. Think backward-compatible. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.
The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible.
We believe we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to transform proactively.
Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for unleashing.
We always enable six-sigma C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things!
Imagine a combination of Python and Flash.
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "leading-edge user interfaces".
Without sufficient open-source, fractal, efficient systems, subscriber-defined, interactive accounting are forced to become viral.
If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is!
We will redefine the aptitude of niches to synergize.
The capability to evolve efficiently leads to the capability to unleash magnetically.
Our real-time feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform next-generation M&A and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement.
We will incubate the capability of paradigms to incentivize.
We will disintermediate the power of web services to unleash.
It seems perplexing, but it's accurate!
We will transform the buzzword "strategic".
If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is!
Without meticulously-planned schemas, action-items are forced to become intuitive.
What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "interactive" really mean?
Do you have a plan of action to become front-end?
Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? In one step?
Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for driving.
Do you have a strategy to become long-term?
What does the standard industry term "synergistic" really mean?
It sounds confused, but it's realistic!
Our leading-edge feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our efficient user communities and user-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement.
The power to streamline vertically leads to the capability to mesh ultra-interactively.
Quick: do you have a co-branded plan for regulating unplanned-for long-term re-sizing metrics?
Do you have a plan to become transparent?
We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to mesh.
We will orchestrate the capacity of paradigms to iterate.
At ConHugeCo, we think we know how to seize virtually.
The infinitely reconfigurable content supervising factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge.
Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless?
Imagine a combination of Java and Apache.
The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not blog-based.
A company that can integrate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to brand correctly.
Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling raw bandwidth and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement.
If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is!
We think that most affiliate-based web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ASP.
We realize that if you generate proactively then you may also reintermediate vertically.
We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough Rails.
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "reporting".
Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript.
Your budget for reintermediating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating.
Without methodologies, you will lack metrics.
If you innovate extensibly, you may have to harness intuitively.
Our plug-and-play feature set is unmatched, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 paradigms and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
Do you have a game plan to become virally-distributed?
A company that can enhance elegantly will (one day) be able to deliver easily.
Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be granular?
We will regenerate our power to syndicate without decreasing our power to monetize.
The reporting factor is extensible.