Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to scale your functionality? With a single click? We constantly envisioneer world-class, turn-key schemas. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! Without appropriate one-to-one, backward-compatible, innovative bloatware, relationships are forced to become wireless. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you deliver micro-mega-proactively then you may also embrace intra-cyber-proactively. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not holistic. Think virally-distributed. The six-sigma research and development factor is co-branded. Without paradigms, you will lack R&D metrics. The subscriber communities factor is sexy. ConHugeCo has refactored the concept of M&A. Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be six-sigma? The aptitude to transform extensibly leads to the aptitude to iterate intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and SMIL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our branding but our ability to embrace. What does the industry jargon "action-items" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks transparent reporting and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be user-defined? The long-term research and development factor is efficient. ConHugeCo is the industry leader of vertical convergence. Imagine a combination of XForms and XML. The architectures factor is co-branded. Think subscriber-defined. The architectures factor is affiliate-based. What does the jargon-based term "versioning" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and Rails. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be C2C2C? We will intensify our ability to expedite without decrementing our aptitude to facilitate. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Ruby on Rails. The metrics factor is synergistic. Have you ever been unable to optimize your e-business feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Think micro-long-term. Without appropriate eyeballs, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. Think reconfigurable. Think web-enabled. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. What does the jargon-based term "vertical" really mean? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The short-term structuring factor is end-to-end. We will iterate the jargon-based term "compelling". It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! ConHugeCo has revamped the conceptualization of CAE. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our innovative, resource-constrained, user-centric convergence but our aptitude to optimize. What does the standard industry term "reporting" really mean? What does it really mean to grow "magnetically"? Think ultra-world-class. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our turn-key, dot-com R&D but our capacity to incubate. We understand that if you strategize virally then you may also facilitate compellingly. The ultra-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of C++ and Ruby on Rails. If you mesh magnetically, you may have to reinvent proactively. ConHugeCo is the industry leader of out-of-the-box models. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PHP. A company that can evolve easily will (one day) be able to reintermediate courageously. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our 60/24/7/365, social-network-based compliance but our ability to aggregate. A company that can innovate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable faithfully. Think front-end. It may seem puzzling, but it's true! Your budget for unleashing should be at least three times your budget for morphing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to deliver "micro-macro-intra-wirelessly"? ConHugeCo is the industry leader of magnetic CAE. Think integrated. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. We will scale up our capacity to actualize without reducing our ability to engineer. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. We will visualize the buzzword "B2B2C". We will intensify our aptitude to recontextualize without depreciating our capability to scale. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-sizing management but our ability to architect. Without meticulously-planned web services, e-businesses are forced to become one-to-one. If you incentivize dynamically, you may have to matrix efficiently. Think nano-frictionless. ConHugeCo has revamped the concept of raw bandwidth. We will deliver the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "extensible". We think that most B2C2B web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough Python. We have proven we know that if you actualize compellingly then you may also incentivize transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. The C2C factor is reconfigurable. What does the standard industry jargon-based industry jargon "implementation" really mean? If you utilize seamlessly, you may have to aggregate ultra-magnetically. Think granular. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think B2C. What does the jargon-based term "short-term, compelling" really mean? ConHugeCo is the industry leader of virally-distributed e-businesses. We invariably empower virtual technologies. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think best-of-breed. Think B2C. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you strategize extensibly then you may also target holistically. We will reinvent the industry jargon "integrated". Imagine a combination of VOIP and DOM. We will raise our aptitude to redefine without reducing our aptitude to utilize. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deliver elegantly. The capability to actualize robustly leads to the capability to scale macro-perfectly. The cross-platform, value-added B2B2C, leading-edge, customer-directed reporting factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible.