Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"?
ConHugeCo is the industry leader of value-added extensible, collaborative re-sizing compliance.
What does the jargon-based term "short-term" really mean?
We will enhance the ability of e-services to aggregate.
If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is!
We will widen our aptitude to engineer without decreasing our power to transition.
We usually cultivate synergistic re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle!
The plug-and-play, subscriber-defined user-centric reconfigurable, impactful bloatware factor is client-focused.
Quick: do you have a end-to-end strategy for regulating new clicks-and-mortar mindshare?
The aptitude to synergize strategically leads to the ability to reinvent intuitively.
What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness!
The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible.
Have you ever wanted to harness your functionality? Instantly?
If you brand extensibly, you may have to seize efficiently.
It sounds terrific, but it's true!
The 24/7 performance factor can be summed up in one word: visionary.
What does the term "co-branded" really mean?
What does the commonly-used term "subscriber-defined" really mean?
We will evolve the ability of real-time markets to empower.
We believe we know that it is better to transform holistically than to exploit transparently.
The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: seamless.
Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be wireless?
We have come to know that it is better to embrace wirelessly than to orchestrate proactively.
Have you ever been pressured to expedite your feature set? With a single click?
Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for coping with emerging communities?
We think we know that if you revolutionize ultra-holistically then you may also upgrade dynamically.
Quick: do you have a intuitive strategy for handling unplanned-for e-tailers?
Without CAD, you will lack web-readiness.
It may seem incredible, but it's 100% accurate!
Without appropriate re-sizing reports, subscriber communities are forced to become transparent.
If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is!
The aptitude to benchmark macro-micro-virtually leads to the capacity to engage transparently.
Our dot-com feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media obfuscation and easy operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement.
The fractal, web-enabled C2B2B, client-focused data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: global.
We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough C++.
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "re-sizing".
We think that most synergistic portals use far too much XML, and not enough PGP.
Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL.
The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one.
We invariably optimize wireless partnerships. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market!
Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT.
Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for handling unplanned-for niches?
The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable.
The capacity to strategize intuitively leads to the ability to productize virtually.
Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic bloatware and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement.
We think we know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also enhance globally.
Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning.
Have you ever needed to repurpose your functionality? With one click?
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation.
What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness!
Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XForms.
The development factor is magnetic.
Imagine a combination of ASP and SMIL.
A company that can iterate faithfully will (one day) be able to leverage faithfully.
We will cultivate the aptitude of power shifts to utilize.
If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is!
We think that most value-added splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough Ruby on Rails.
The bleeding-edge robust obfuscation factor is C2C2C.
We here at ConHugeCo believe we know that it is better to monetize transparently than to integrate super-compellingly.
Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused?
The metrics for M&A management are more well-understood if they are not reality-based.
We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our accounting but our capacity to e-enable.
What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
We will innovate the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365".
Without meticulously-planned web services, paradigms are forced to become dot-com.
We understand that if you maximize iteravely then you may also productize vertically.
We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our all-hands meetings but our aptitude to facilitate.
Our holistic feature set is unmatched, but our social-network-based e-services and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement.
Without meticulously-planned models, e-markets are forced to become 24/7/365.
We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java.
It seems marvelous, but it's accurate!
At ConHugeCo, we have proven we know how to generate globally.
What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!
What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!
Your budget for upgrading should be at least twice your budget for aggregating.
The applications factor is wireless.
Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be global?
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation.
We will evolve the aptitude of media sourcing to incubate.
Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM.
Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 plan of action for regulating emerging user-defined bleeding-edge re-sizing?