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Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Company Name: 

Your Randomly-Generated Corporate Gibberish:


We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use.
We here at ConHugeCo have proven we know that it is better to strategize magnetically than to innovate nano-iteravely. Without cutting-edge bandwidth, you will lack resource-constrained development. The iteration factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is second to none, but our best-of-breed, real-time structuring and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack extensible research and development. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and IIS. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Think granular. Think social-network-based, robust. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "sexy, next-generation" really mean? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without well-planned blog-based, clicks-and-mortar development, implementation metrics are forced to become cross-media.
Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for monitoring unplanned-for frictionless, 24/7/365 customer-directed B2B2C 60/24/7/365 re-purposing?
ConHugeCo has permanently altered the conceptualization of users. We pride ourselves not only on our virally-distributed feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to enhance perfectly. Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for extending. Without CAE, you will lack partnerships. What does the buzzword "front-end" really mean? Think intra-C2C2C. We will productize the ability of user interfaces to streamline. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does it really mean to matrix "intuitively"? Think granular. Think long-term. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time.
If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is!
ConHugeCo has revolutionized the idea of aggregation. Quick: do you have a clicks-and-mortar plan of action for monitoring new infrastructures? Think mega-revolutionary. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "e-businesses" really mean? Without sticky, B2C2B fractal accounting, you will lack returns-on-investment. Without resource-constrained, bricks-and-clicks applications, you will lack models. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XSL. What does it really mean to transition "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for coping with new interfaces? Our best-of-breed feature set is second to none, but our end-to-end, frictionless architectures and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? We have come to know that if you aggregate iteravely then you may also deploy strategically.
Do you have a plan of action to become scalable?
ConHugeCo is the industry leader of back-end sexy short-term, short-term, end-to-end content supervising. We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard strategically than to utilize super-holistically. Do you have a plan of action to become vertical? Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Quick: do you have a short-term, bleeding-edge game plan for regulating emerging systems? What does it really mean to matrix "wirelessly"? Think B2C2B. Think real-time. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Without accounting, you will lack niches. The compliance factor is strategic. Think short-term.
Without sufficient returns-on-investment, biometrics are forced to become subscriber-defined.
ConHugeCo practically invented the term "applications". What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will rev up our capacity to drive without devaluing our ability to integrate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling back-end branding and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for coping with emerging infomediaries? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our initiatives but our capability to e-enable. Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Without meticulously-planned user communities, technologies are forced to become B2B2C. A company that can strategize elegantly will (someday) be able to generate faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our clicks-and-mortar feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. A company that can implement fiercely will (one day) be able to engage correctly.
Our open-source feature set is unmatched, but our wireless, end-to-end process management and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.
We here at ConHugeCo think we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to incubate dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and VOIP. A company that can optimize elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to exploit correctly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will widen our ability to deliver without decreasing our capability to disintermediate. If you deploy cyber-robustly, you may have to maximize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be enterprise, 60/24/7/365, best-of-breed, dot-com? We think we know that it is better to disintermediate virally than to syndicate mega-vertically. We will cultivate the term "bleeding-edge".

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