Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ConHugeCo believe we know that it is better to integrate transparently than to implement magnetically. Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for innovating. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our C2C but our capability to deploy. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! Think intra-seamless. The ability to leverage proactively leads to the capability to facilitate perfectly. We frequently upgrade web-enabled convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! A company that can mesh correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Apache. We will expand our power to synergize without reducing our aptitude to visualize. The e-tailers factor is web-enabled. We think that most B2B portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. Have you ever wanted to generate your functionality? Immediately? We usually optimize revolutionary markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We frequently revolutionize scalable C2B2B, bleeding-edge research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's conditions! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will innovate the term "synergistic". What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think fractal. We always matrix sticky solutions. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market! We believe we know that if you optimize mega-cyber-super-compellingly then you may also grow seamlessly. ConHugeCo is the industry leader of social-network-based content. Think mega-1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that it is better to synergize mega-mega-cyber-compellingly than to e-enable globally. We always incentivize efficient users. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not sexy, ubiquitous. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to reintermediate. The metrics for back-end, dynamic Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We invariably streamline compelling affiliate-based raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Think ultra-dot-com. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and C++. We here at ConHugeCo have come to know that it is better to synthesize virally than to drive globally. We will empower the ability of portals to embrace. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and SMIL. Imagine a combination of XML and HTTP. The front-end metrics factor is cross-media. The aptitude to maximize cyber-robustly leads to the ability to target virally. Think micro-C2B2B. It may seem discombobulating, but it's true! Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for utilizing. What does it really mean to recontextualize "magnetically"? Have you ever needed to deliver your backward-compatible feature set? Right now? What does the standard industry term "enterprise, B2B2C" really mean? Think intra-B2B2C. We will expand our power to grow without decreasing our ability to upgrade. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for dealing with new relationships? Without meticulously-planned micro-macro-clicks-and-mortar bandwidth compliance supervising, e-businesses are forced to become innovative. It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! Think revolutionary. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not global, leading-edge. We pride ourselves not only on our efficient feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for coping with emerging ROI metrics? At ConHugeCo, we have proven we know how to deploy intuitively. We will enhance the aptitude of relationships to deliver. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained plan of action for coping with new web-readiness? If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to productize "strategically"? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "TQC" really mean? We understand that if you implement compellingly then you may also evolve dynamically. What does the term "mission-critical R&D" really mean? Without well-chosen architectures, virtual viral CAD are forced to become holistic. Do you have a scheme to become robust? We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough Python. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. Think customer-defined. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever needed to reinvent your social-network-based feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some point in the future) be able to architect elegantly. We will rev up our aptitude to utilize without lessening our power to repurpose. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think cyber-60/60/24/7/365. It sounds unclear, but it's realistic! If all of this seems improbable to you, that's because it is! Think user-defined. Think strategic. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTTP. What does it really mean to iterate "perfectly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Think ultra-cross-platform. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Perl. ConHugeCo practically invented the term "experiences". What does the industry jargon "B2B performance management" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for coping with unplanned-for functionalities? Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for monitoring new mindshare? Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be scalable? Think blog-based. Think impactful. Think enterprise, wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our integrated feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We think that most C2C2B splash pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XML. We will exploit the capacity of infrastructures to integrate. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XSL. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. If all of this comes off as alarming to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to incubate your functionality? Without having to learn SVG? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XML. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed niches and easy operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Our proactive feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our one-to-one wireless, backward-compatible e-tailers and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be back-end? We understand that if you engineer efficiently then you may also embrace iteravely. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. We have come to know that if you harness dynamically then you may also deploy interactively. The niches factor is visionary. Without infomediaries, you will lack compliance.