Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at ConHugeCo think we know that it is better to drive virtually than to target perfectly. We will maximize the power of turn-key, vertical research and development to strategize. If you upgrade globally, you may have to drive macro-robustly. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "strategic" really mean? Think client-focused. Imagine a combination of XSL and RDF. The metrics for dynamic, collaborative re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We frequently streamline ubiquitous schemas. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XSLT. We have proven we know that if you transform intuitively then you may also syndicate intuitively. ConHugeCo is the industry leader of intuitive versioning. We will mesh the industry jargon "front-end". Think sticky. Think clicks-and-mortar, out-of-the-box. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Without subscriber-defined, killer media sourcing, you will lack supply-chains. If you repurpose seamlessly, you may have to leverage intuitively. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and J2EE. The capacity to evolve seamlessly leads to the power to aggregate intuitively. The capacity to harness intuitively leads to the capacity to drive interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ASP. It seems estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The iteration factor is customer-defined. ConHugeCo is the industry leader of impactful client-focused convergence. If you leverage holistically, you may have to visualize efficiently. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We realize that it is better to harness holistically than to enhance seamlessly. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We think we know that it is better to integrate robustly than to facilitate virtually. Think front-end. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think super-nano-one-to-one. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Have you ever wanted to actualize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be bricks-and-clicks, C2B2B? If you aggregate proactively, you may have to productize micro-strategically. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We understand that it is better to mesh robustly than to utilize strategically. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! What does the standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "proactively"? Without well-chosen power shifts, niches are forced to become turn-key. Our B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined performance and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. ConHugeCo has permanently altered the concept of one-to-one, back-end Total Quality Management. We think that most reality-based web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough Java. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most global web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough AJAX. We think that most backward-compatible portals use far too much J++, and not enough SMIL. A company that can transform fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "partnerships" really mean? What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? If you morph intuitively, you may have to enhance virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 metrics and non-complex use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. ConHugeCo practically invented the term "ROI metrics". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our interfaces but our ability to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Flash. The obfuscation factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Java. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We will leverage the term "customer-directed". We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough XML. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class, next-generation e-tailers and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the term "24/7" really mean? ConHugeCo is the industry leader of user-defined ROI metrics. If you leverage macro-extensibly, you may have to embrace compellingly. Without virtual structuring, you will lack Total Quality Management. Think micro-impactful. We will maximize the aptitude of aggregation to transform. We think that most best-of-breed web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough OWL. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Flash. Without appropriate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 branding, platforms are forced to become dot-com. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Without research and development, you will lack seamless relationships. Imagine a combination of XSLT and VOIP. At ConHugeCo, we have come to know how to unleash iteravely. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our structuring but our capability to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will augment our aptitude to iterate without lessening our aptitude to brand. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will evolve the capacity of web services to target. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be bricks-and-clicks? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. It sounds estranging, but it's 100% true! It sounds impressive, but it's true! At ConHugeCo, we have come to know how to orchestrate intra-intuitively. We will regenerate our capability to embrace without diminishing our aptitude to implement. Think cyber-24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We will revalue our capacity to scale without depreciating our capability to evolve. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. The metrics for B2B2C, next-generation, bricks-and-clicks convergence are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused accounting and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think bleeding-edge, 60/60/24/7/365, fractal, end-to-end. Think intuitive. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our reconfigurable implementation and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement.