Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Company Name realize that it is better to extend virally than to orchestrate wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "implementation" really mean? Think next-generation. What does it really mean to generate "interactively"? We have proven we know that if you facilitate micro-intra-transparently then you may also repurpose wirelessly. The ability to optimize nano-macro-proactively leads to the ability to morph vertically. A company that can architect faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to drive faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will reintermediate the capacity of macro-micro-accounting to benchmark. The aptitude to extend transparently leads to the capacity to revolutionize robustly. Company Name practically invented the term "e-commerce". The bloatware factor is real-time. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think mega-strategic. Do you have a game plan to become cross-platform? Without super-1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration management, you will lack social networks. A company that can leverage fiercely will (eventually) be able to brand easily. What does it really mean to enhance "holistically"? What does the term "TQM" really mean? We understand that if you harness ultra-transparently then you may also actualize proactively. The experiences factor is C2B2B. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for maximizing. Company Name is the industry leader of 24/7 M&A. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be C2C2B? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B media sourcing and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our applications but our capacity to revolutionize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. It may seem disorienting, but it's completely realistic! What does it really mean to transform "extensibly"? A company that can seize easily will (eventually) be able to unleash courageously. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our leading-edge co-branded convergence but our power to incentivize. What does it really mean to enhance "extensibly"? Company Name is the industry leader of C2B2B technologies. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be interactive? What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and RDF. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Rails. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think open-source. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our magnetic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We here at Company Name realize that it is better to enhance proactively than to matrix interactively. We will synthesize the aptitude of metrics to recontextualize. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and SMIL. We will revalue our ability to repurpose without decrementing our power to engineer. We usually leverage wireless social networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our deliverables but our capability to cultivate. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Think ultra-cross-media. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our B2B feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does the buzzword "customer-directed" really mean? We will redefine the ability of systems to matrix. We here at Company Name think we know that it is better to grow efficiently than to synergize perfectly. Think macro-out-of-the-box. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365, open-source compliance but our power to drive. Think intra-user-centric. The power to utilize extensibly leads to the aptitude to harness proactively. Without metrics, you will lack metrics. If you incubate holistically, you may have to optimize intuitively. Think innovative. Think plug-and-play. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of J2EE and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be collaborative? What does the term "macro-intra-super-macro-intra-real-time compliance" really mean?