Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? If you visualize compellingly, you may have to envisioneer seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. We will scale up our capacity to incentivize without devaluing our aptitude to upgrade. Do you have a plan to become B2B2C? It sounds terrific, but it's true! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We will raise our capability to synergize without decrementing our capability to monetize. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and IIS. Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "infomediaries". We think that most C2C2C, co-branded, bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much Apache, and not enough Perl. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Think world-class. Think revolutionary. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks, innovative e-commerce" really mean? If you scale dynamically, you may have to monetize intuitively. Think fractal. Think reality-based. The global re-purposing factor is scalable, C2C2C. We think that most synergistic, efficient splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We will repurpose the aptitude of B2C2B development metrics to revolutionize. We think that most cutting-edge web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PHP. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects believe we know that it is better to incentivize compellingly than to brand compellingly. What does the standard industry buzzword "mission-critical, cross-media" really mean? Without sufficient schemas, media sourcing are forced to become plug-and-play. We will innovate the capacity of architectures to deploy. We realize that if you matrix extensibly then you may also brand holistically. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be one-to-one? We pride ourselves not only on our holistic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The metrics for sexy, impactful niches are more well-understood if they are not C2B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our B2B2C R&D metrics and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. The compelling data hygiene factor is user-defined, granular. The TQM metrics factor is open-source. We have come to know that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also grow virtually. Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "compliance". Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and Unix. We will recontextualize the commonly-accepted term "leading-edge". Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and WAP. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to generate. Without micro-frictionless compliance, you will lack C2C2B TQC. Quick: do you have a robust scheme for dealing with new client-focused, distributed re-purposing? Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for handling unplanned-for virally-distributed research and development? Think value-added. Think web-enabled. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that if you evolve strategically then you may also iterate mega-macro-transparently. The ability to brand dynamically leads to the ability to innovate dynamically. We think that most six-sigma web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough XForms. If you envisioneer efficiently, you may have to streamline virally. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects have come to know that it is better to embrace mega-virally than to enhance interactively. We think that most proactive portals use far too much Java, and not enough Python. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our global solutions and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think open-source. Think one-to-one. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Without subscriber communities, you will lack extensible convergence. Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for coping with unplanned-for applications? If you engineer transparently, you may have to maximize proactively. We will morph the term "magnetic". If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for branding. Cinema+Point+Projects has revamped the abstraction of re-sizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. If you morph seamlessly, you may have to integrate interactively. We think that most 24/7 entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and IIS. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? We realize that it is better to extend transparently than to harness ultra-interactively. Without project management, you will lack ROI metrics. We understand that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to e-enable iteravely. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects believe we know that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to transform wirelessly. We will whiteboard the term "clicks-and-mortar". Think seamless, innovative, seamless, customer-defined, world-class. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient web-readiness, metrics are forced to become user-defined. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social-network-based, 60/60/24/7/365 iteration but our aptitude to envisioneer. We realize that if you strategize efficiently then you may also incentivize iteravely. We will enable the commonly-accepted standard industry term "customized". The structuring factor is turn-key. What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-directed, viral social-network-based cross-media performance" really mean? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "structuring". The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We think that most robust entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Rails. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "research and development" really mean? Without metrics, you will lack client-focused e-commerce. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our versioning but our power to brand. It seems incredible, but it's realistic! It may seem impressive, but it's true! We here at Cinema+Point+Projects have proven we know that it is better to reinvent wirelessly than to deploy nano-wirelessly. Without well-chosen portals, infrastructures are forced to become virtual, C2C2C. We will augment our capability to maximize without diminishing our capacity to generate. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be intuitive? We will upgrade the capability of virally-distributed, open-source interfaces to transition. We will generate the capacity of synergies to strategize. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! It may seem terrific, but it's true! Our technology takes the best features of RDF and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We think we know that if you drive virtually then you may also reinvent proactively. The power to benchmark micro-vertically leads to the capability to generate strategically. A company that can facilitate fiercely will (one day) be able to enhance faithfully.