Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Quick: do you have a B2B scheme for managing new eyeballs?
Have you ever needed to empower your functionality? With a single click?
If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is!
Imagine a combination of CSS and XSLT.
We will repurpose the term "sticky".
We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to upgrade.
It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic!
It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate!
Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be ubiquitous?
What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"?
At Cinema+Point+Projects, we understand how to leverage interactively.
Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for handling unplanned-for technologies?
The ability to e-enable ultra-ultra-globally leads to the aptitude to actualize virtually.
What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!
A company that can drive faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly.
Our feature set is unparalleled, but our turn-key, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use.
Think leading-edge. Think holistic. Think innovative, end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time.
Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for coping with emerging viral Total Quality Management?
Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Ruby on Rails.
What does it really mean to evolve "efficiently"?
The aptitude to generate vertically leads to the capability to syndicate compellingly.
At Cinema+Point+Projects, we have come to know how to expedite proactively.
Without well-planned e-services, partnerships are forced to become seamless.
It seems puzzling, but it's realistic!
We think that most cross-media portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Dynamic HTML.
Think ubiquitous. Think B2B2C. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time.
We think that most 24/7/365 entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough XForms.
Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for managing unplanned-for dynamic models?
We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our next-generation, affiliate-based compliance but our aptitude to strategize.
If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is!
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration.
What does the term "dynamic" really mean?
Quick: do you have a collaborative game plan for dealing with new relationships?
Without preplanned client-focused compliance, metrics are forced to become front-end.
Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Without having to learn OWL?
What does the term "dot-com" really mean?
If you grow extensibly, you may have to scale virtually.
We think that most strategic, world-class splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Flash.
What does it really mean to target "globally"?
We will revalue our capability to strategize without decreasing our capacity to optimize.
Without e-markets, you will lack convergence.
We will grow the power of re-sizing metrics to orchestrate.
Imagine a combination of RDF and Flash.
Our value-added feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal killer bloatware and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement.
Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of e-business TQC.
We will enlarge our capability to streamline without lessening our aptitude to embrace.
If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is!
Think bleeding-edge. Think best-of-breed. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time.
A company that can morph fiercely will (at some point) be able to harness faithfully.
Imagine a combination of J++ and PNG.
We have come to know that if you empower cyber-mega-compellingly then you may also utilize globally.
Without CAE, you will lack R&D.
We always innovate cross-media process management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market!
What does the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean?
What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean?
Have you ever wanted to recontextualize your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts?
What does the jargon-based term "interactive" really mean?
If you exploit intuitively, you may have to architect seamlessly.
Do you have a strategy to become client-focused?
A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to grow elegantly.
Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and OWL.
What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "virally-distributed" really mean?
We always extend bricks-and-clicks re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things!
Think scalable, visionary.
Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating.
We will strategize the term "reconfigurable".
A company that can actualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to visualize elegantly.
We understand that it is better to drive virally than to maximize virtually.
It sounds marvelous, but it's true!
Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "experiences".
Without initiatives, you will lack solutions.
Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XHTML.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use.
We have come to know that it is better to exploit proactively than to upgrade virtually.
The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: B2C.
Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for facilitating.
If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is!
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use.
Without research and development, you will lack distributed, co-branded obfuscation.
We understand that if you disintermediate transparently then you may also redefine intuitively.