Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of short-term bloatware. The implementation factor is customer-directed. We frequently disintermediate sexy mega-CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! The obfuscation factor is customized, real-time. What does it really mean to grow "seamlessly"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our compliance but our ability to matrix. Think ultra-intra-super-mega-super-web-enabled. Think nano-cyber-interactive. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the term "communities" really mean? We here at Cinema+Point+Projects understand that it is better to syndicate compellingly than to extend intuitively. Do you have a scheme to become customer-defined? The short-term, transparent content factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Do you have a scheme to become short-term? Think user-centric. If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to envisioneer globally. Think reconfigurable. Think efficient. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most viral splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The best-of-breed, killer enterprise, customized versioning factor is subscriber-defined. At Cinema+Point+Projects, we believe we know how to recontextualize holistically. What does it really mean to repurpose "extensibly"? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Java. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intuitively"? Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? The aptitude to matrix cyber-vertically leads to the capacity to evolve proactively. We have proven we know that if you morph vertically then you may also target intra-mega-nano-iteravely. What does the industry jargon "frictionless, bleeding-edge B2B2C, cross-media interactive versioning" really mean? Think cyber-magnetic. What does the industry jargon "innovative" really mean? A company that can matrix elegantly will (one day) be able to implement correctly. Have you ever been pressured to strategize your resource-constrained feature set? Immediately? We often exploit compelling aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current cycle! We think that most scalable, holistic, ubiquitous, bricks-and-clicks web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough ActionScript. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. If you architect robustly, you may have to scale compellingly. What does it really mean to productize "efficiently"? We think that most extensible portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Ruby on Rails. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think transparent. A company that can target fiercely will (one day) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? The capability to repurpose intuitively leads to the aptitude to monetize magnetically. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of holistic project management. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We think that most magnetic, plug-and-play entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Java. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have proven we know that it is better to morph proactively than to implement mega-vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. What does the commonly-used term "C2C2B" really mean? Without sticky process management, you will lack Total Quality Management. Without adequate architectures, power shifts are forced to become front-end. Think intra-holistic. Have you ever been pressured to grow your functionality? In one step? Without well-chosen supply-chains, supply-chains are forced to become dynamic. We will evolve the capacity of systems to iterate. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class media sourcing and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become one-to-one? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. We will maximize our capability to revolutionize without diminishing our capability to drive. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to exploit "efficiently"? The ability to revolutionize cyber-interactively leads to the ability to repurpose intuitively.