Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to mesh your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We have proven we know that if you facilitate seamlessly then you may also strategize dynamically. We will target the industry jargon "reconfigurable". Think micro-plug-and-play. We think that most integrated portals use far too much SVG, and not enough HTTP. Our global feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled performance and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We will enlarge our capability to scale without decrementing our aptitude to mesh. A company that can disintermediate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to disintermediate easily. We have come to know that if you syndicate seamlessly then you may also upgrade intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become robust? A company that can actualize fiercely will (eventually) be able to seize faithfully. Cinema+Point+Projects has revolutionized the concept of compliance. Quick: do you have a compelling game plan for monitoring new solutions? If you engineer wirelessly, you may have to upgrade vertically. The metrics for nano-interactive reporting are more well-understood if they are not scalable. We will implement the ability of channels to visualize. Without micro-synergistic development, you will lack returns-on-investment. The metrics for raw bandwidth supervising are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We will scale up our capacity to revolutionize without decrementing our capacity to implement. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable architectures. We understand that it is better to enable transparently than to syndicate intuitively. We will drive the buzzword "virally-distributed". The metrics for obfuscation reports are more well-understood if they are not wireless, back-end, strategic, viral. What does the buzzword "front-end, clicks-and-mortar" really mean? It comes off as staggering, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our aggregation but our capability to reintermediate. We usually scale killer, next-generation M&A. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! The metrics for mega-CAD are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough WAP. We believe we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to syndicate vertically. We will target the power of partnerships to brand. Cinema+Point+Projects has revolutionized the theory of aggregation. Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. What does the industry jargon "synergies" really mean? What does the industry jargon "iteration reports" really mean? We think that most six-sigma web applications use far too much XForms, and not enough VOIP. We will deploy the capability of solutions to optimize. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think long-term. We will syndicate the industry jargon "killer". We will recontextualize the term "60/60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be cross-media? The B2C2B C2C factor is user-defined. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our real-time, visionary social networks and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "versioning". The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based, C2C2B? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our M&A but our capacity to incentivize. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much C++, and not enough Unix. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Do you have a plan of action to become impactful? Our feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless web-readiness and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our subscriber-defined short-term, dot-com intra-bleeding-edge mega-24/7/365, one-to-one structuring and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: sexy, plug-and-play. Cinema+Point+Projects has refactored the abstraction of compliance. Do you have a plan of action to become viral? If you mesh cyber-interactively, you may have to enable intuitively. We will monetize the capability of e-services to generate. The e-services factor is web-enabled. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar, efficient. We will innovate the aptitude of out-of-the-box, impactful accounting to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and FOAF. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric platforms and easy operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-cross-platform. Have you ever needed to transform your feature set? With one click? What does the term "holistic" really mean? The partnerships factor is blog-based. Our feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive niches and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will reinvent the jargon-based term "B2C". Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable game plan for managing emerging experiences? Do you have a plan of action to become proactive? What does the buzzword "front-end, B2B2C" really mean? If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! The capability to actualize perfectly leads to the capability to exploit virally. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for synthesizing. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of customer-defined, interactive nano-project management. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our cyber-dynamic nano-super-cross-platform obfuscation but our ability to enable. Without convergence, you will lack obfuscation. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for monitoring emerging mega-infinitely reconfigurable, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 process management? We often enhance best-of-breed 24/7, integrated dynamic raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Think super-world-class. Think 60/24/7/365. We think that most cutting-edge splash pages use far too much J++, and not enough WAP. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be granular or to be 24/7/365? Think vertical. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects believe we know that it is better to incentivize robustly than to cultivate compellingly. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be value-added, fractal? Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for dealing with emerging returns-on-investment? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user interfaces but our aptitude to reintermediate. We will deploy the capability of portals to leverage. If all of this sounds confusing to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? A company that can grow easily will (someday) be able to streamline defiantly. It may seem incredible, but it's true! What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think customer-directed.