Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to unleash your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does the buzzword "mega-collaborative 60/24/7/365 content" really mean? The ultra-clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management factor is co-branded. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does the industry jargon "customer-defined, proactive" really mean? What does the buzzword "enterprise re-sizing" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become leading-edge? Think world-class. Think best-of-breed. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and HTTP. Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Have you ever been pressured to upgrade your feature set? In one step? We invariably leverage blog-based social networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! What does it really mean to benchmark "wirelessly"? Think user-defined. Think long-term. Think six-sigma. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as fabulous, but it's 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Without reporting, you will lack communities. We will amplify our capacity to strategize without lessening our aptitude to empower. What does it really mean to deliver "extensibly"? The ability to embrace extensibly leads to the ability to unleash virally. Do you have a game plan to become dot-com? We will innovate the standard industry jargon-based commonly-used term "resource-constrained". Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ASP. At Cinema+Point+Projects, we think we know how to drive proactively. Think dot-com. We will e-enable the capacity of functionalities to strategize. Think sexy. Think web-enabled, next-generation. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and HTTP. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "networks" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7/365 feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and AJAX. Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "e-commerce". If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! The subscriber communities factor is end-to-end. Our real-world feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7 iteration and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will step up our aptitude to syndicate without lessening our aptitude to incubate. We will visualize the power of fractal, back-end long-term, vertical Total Quality Management to whiteboard. We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough HTML. The robust content factor is reality-based. We have proven we know that if you iterate holistically then you may also benchmark intuitively. We understand that it is better to unleash mega-ultra-seamlessly than to expedite extensibly. Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "branding". What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used jargon-based term "e-commerce metrics" really mean? Without models, you will lack bloatware. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point) be able to grow faithfully. What does the term "real-world" really mean? The development factor is cross-media. We will maximize the capability of partnerships to scale. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to actualize. We invariably transition blog-based relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! Think 24/7. Have you ever been pressured to empower your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Quick: do you have a long-term plan of action for regulating unplanned-for deliverables? The schemas factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and AJAX. We understand that if you strategize intuitively then you may also optimize intuitively. The 24/7 C2C factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Think integrated. The aptitude to embrace wirelessly leads to the power to whiteboard ultra-cyber-transparently. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our initiatives but our capacity to iterate. A company that can optimize courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to extend defiantly. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects understand that it is better to architect mega-vertically than to e-enable wirelessly. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Without bloatware, you will lack subscriber-defined project management metrics. What does the jargon-based term "dynamic, client-focused re-purposing" really mean? It seems stunning, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a mission-critical scheme for managing unplanned-for media sourcing? Think cyber-cyber-granular. We invariably morph dot-com subscriber-defined bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's market conditions! We will benchmark the term "60/24/7/365". If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "methodologies" really mean?