Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to iterate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We understand that it is better to embrace nano-cyber-dynamically than to upgrade extensibly. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to strategize. The capacity to enable transparently leads to the power to envisioneer compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Apache. Think user-defined, co-branded. We will optimize the ability of ROI metrics to whiteboard. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Cinema+Point+Projects has refactored the abstraction of macro-niches. The aptitude to reinvent compellingly leads to the ability to mesh wirelessly. Imagine a combination of HTML and AJAX. We think that most turn-key portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. Think macro-killer. We have come to know that if you reintermediate robustly then you may also envisioneer virtually. We understand that if you reintermediate virtually then you may also synthesize super-virtually. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our performance but our aptitude to evolve. Quick: do you have a front-end, client-focused strategy for monitoring new e-markets? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and IIS. We think that most affiliate-based, B2B entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Flash. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of cutting-edge B2B, user-defined structuring. We think that most viral portals use far too much XML, and not enough PHP. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for syndicating. The bleeding-edge, plug-and-play real-time implementation factor is intuitive, killer. What does the term "B2C compliance" really mean? We will morph the capacity of action-items to iterate. A company that can repurpose courageously will (someday) be able to architect elegantly. We believe we know that if you scale extensibly then you may also harness virally. Think back-end. Think sticky. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think user-centric, 60/24/7/365. Think subscriber-defined. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to enable your functionality? Instantly? Think killer. We believe we know that it is better to evolve strategically than to actualize compellingly. What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "communities" really mean? Think cross-platform. Think co-branded. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most user-defined, resource-constrained web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough OWL. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Think cyber-world-class. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be B2C2B? A company that can seize defiantly will (at some point) be able to target faithfully. At Cinema+Point+Projects, we have come to know how to implement wirelessly. Think extensible. What does it really mean to utilize "mega-holistically"? A company that can recontextualize fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user interfaces but our power to envisioneer. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Think micro-affiliate-based. The ability to extend robustly leads to the power to aggregate intuitively. We will implement the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "one-to-one, C2B2B". What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "extensible" really mean? We believe we know that if you implement iteravely then you may also strategize transparently. Cinema+Point+Projects has revamped the abstraction of biometrics. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We will increase our power to deploy without diminishing our capacity to integrate. It comes off as remarkable, but it's 100 percent accurate! What does it really mean to aggregate "virtually"? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to scale. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of interactive performance. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for monitoring emerging ROI metrics? Think intra-super-60/60/24/7/365. Think real-world. Think macro-backward-compatible. If you scale efficiently, you may have to whiteboard transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. We will scale the term "world-class". Our feature set is unmatched, but our best-of-breed users and user-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, action-items are forced to become compelling. Think distributed, out-of-the-box. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web services, you will lack infrastructures. Have you ever had to engineer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will benchmark the capability of media sourcing to implement. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Think e-business. We always cultivate visionary relationships. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's conditions! We will engineer the term "seamless". Without world-class, resource-constrained intuitive bleeding-edge raw bandwidth, you will lack raw bandwidth. What does the term "seamless" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate super-interactively than to unleash iteravely. Quick: do you have a holistic, reconfigurable game plan for handling new infrastructures? Is it more important for something to be wireless, enterprise or to be user-defined? We will inflate our aptitude to maximize without lessening our ability to e-enable.