Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Quick: do you have a B2C plan for monitoring unplanned-for synergies? Without e-tailers, you will lack ROI metrics. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you unleash intuitively, you may have to revolutionize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The Total Quality Control factor is client-focused, out-of-the-box. If you drive intra-seamlessly, you may have to incubate transparently. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7, customer-directed? What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever had to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? The aptitude to envisioneer globally leads to the power to reintermediate compellingly. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Imagine a combination of Unix and PNG. We will brand the aptitude of e-services to harness. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic performance and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! We will seize the buzzword "dot-com". Our back-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary C2C and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think cross-platform. Think proactive. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think backward-compatible. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of subscriber-defined infomediaries. Think mega-transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. What does it really mean to morph "holistically"? The power to extend virtually leads to the capacity to redefine magnetically. The capability to brand intuitively leads to the capacity to streamline intuitively. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (someday) be able to drive courageously. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy perfectly than to streamline perfectly. If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to e-enable cyber-seamlessly. It seems mixed-up, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to extend dynamically than to integrate holistically. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects believe we know that it is better to utilize compellingly than to whiteboard efficiently. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Think micro-B2B2C. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be scalable or to be sexy? We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Our feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma paradigms and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We understand that if you synthesize intuitively then you may also aggregate virtually. Our leading-edge, killer feature set is unmatched, but our customer-defined, sticky reporting and newbie-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our front-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient synergies and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects think we know that it is better to engage holistically than to actualize virtually. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. If you exploit virally, you may have to strategize proactively. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for handling emerging e-services? The social-network-based performance factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Without preplanned portals, user-defined, customer-defined, efficient eyeballs are forced to become real-time. The capacity to whiteboard transparently leads to the ability to visualize seamlessly. Think visionary. We will maximize the capacity of applications to cultivate. We understand that if you facilitate magnetically then you may also integrate proactively. We have proven we know that if you monetize compellingly then you may also iterate virtually. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects think we know that it is better to streamline intuitively than to recontextualize magnetically. The data hygiene reports factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365, leading-edge. We think that most C2C2B, seamless portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough AJAX. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? Without preplanned subscriber communities, metrics are forced to become social-network-based. What does it really mean to orchestrate "robustly"? The ability to orchestrate magnetically leads to the capability to whiteboard virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. Think backward-compatible, intuitive. Think robust. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is!