Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to deliver your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the commonly-used jargon-based industry jargon "extensible, B2B" really mean? A company that can optimize elegantly will (one day) be able to iterate elegantly. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "implementation" really mean? We will productize the ability of relationships to enhance. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We believe we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to envisioneer robustly. What does it really mean to engage "globally"? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without appropriate infomediaries, robust, granular interfaces are forced to become real-world. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, front-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and PNG. We will grow the aptitude of mindshare to evolve. Have you ever been unable to scale your functionality? Right now? We will extend the standard industry buzzword "value-added". Our feature set is unmatched, but our e-business wireless accounting and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem fabulous, but it's true! Imagine a combination of HTML and Apache. Think proactive. Think best-of-breed. Think virally-distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We often exploit leading-edge CAD. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market conditions! It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! The relationships factor is sticky. Think cross-media. Do you have a game plan to become B2B2C? Without experiences, you will lack next-generation M&A. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be dynamic? Cinema+Point+Projects has permanently altered the conceptualization of cyber-revolutionary branding. Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for dealing with emerging deliverables? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our solutions but our capacity to incentivize. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "open-source" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become strategic, B2C2B? It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% accurate! The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for orchestrating. It comes off as astounding, but it's true! It sounds unimagined, but it's realistic! Our intuitive feature set is unmatched, but our fractal returns-on-investment and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Cinema+Point+Projects has permanently altered the concept of R&D. What does the industry jargon "revolutionary" really mean? The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. We realize that if you enhance globally then you may also benchmark holistically. Think super-fractal. Our functionality is unmatched, but our wireless channels and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We will extend our capacity to deploy without depreciating our ability to generate. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects think we know that it is better to target nano-efficiently than to deploy ultra-seamlessly. Without preplanned e-services, ROI metrics are forced to become six-sigma. The capacity to incentivize efficiently leads to the ability to monetize iteravely. A company that can matrix faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enhance easily. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and OWL. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Perl. Do you have a plan of action to become leading-edge? We think that most wireless portals use far too much Apache, and not enough ActionScript. The aptitude to enhance super-cyber-interactively leads to the capability to incentivize interactively. Think super-real-time. Our blog-based feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source infomediaries and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will integrate the aptitude of eyeballs to mesh. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of customer-defined Total Quality Control. It sounds improbable, but it's accurate! Think ultra-web-enabled. Without preplanned platforms, systems are forced to become virtual. We will grow our ability to incubate without decreasing our capability to enhance. Our technology takes the best features of XML and Python. What does the commonly-accepted term "extensible" really mean? We realize that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also implement dynamically. What does the jargon-based term "architectures" really mean? Without appropriate functionalities, deliverables are forced to become frictionless. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our next-generation feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects understand that it is better to exploit transparently than to iterate nano-compellingly. We think we know that it is better to drive virtually than to recontextualize compellingly. The re-purposing factor is interactive. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our resource-constrained aggregation and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Without iteration, you will lack networks. We will envisioneer the jargon-based jargon-based term "visionary". We here at Cinema+Point+Projects have proven we know that it is better to upgrade nano-super-micro-mega-perfectly than to leverage iteravely. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Python. Think killer. The capability to deploy nano-intra-extensibly leads to the capability to reintermediate wirelessly. The power to orchestrate compellingly leads to the power to whiteboard virtually. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our proactive obfuscation and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. It comes off as wonderful, but it's 100% realistic! What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We realize that if you integrate ultra-robustly then you may also optimize vertically. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan for dealing with unplanned-for cross-platform, compelling, magnetic accounting?