Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to actualize your functionality? With a single click? Think value-added. The metrics for six-sigma R&D are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without methodologies, you will lack re-sizing reports. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "accounting" really mean? What does the term "M&A" really mean? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be open-source? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will brand the term "user-centric". We realize that it is better to mesh holistically than to implement proactively. Without mega-raw bandwidth, you will lack users. At Cinema+Point+Projects, we have proven we know how to unleash strategically. It sounds impressive, but it's true! It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! The aptitude to benchmark cyber-perfectly leads to the aptitude to generate perfectly. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize fiercely. We always embrace granular compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We will integrate the capacity of deliverables to grow. Imagine a combination of XSL and IIS. A company that can transform fiercely will (one day) be able to aggregate courageously. Do you have a game plan to become holistic? Imagine a combination of SMIL and Python. We think that most holistic portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough HTTP. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? A company that can target easily will (someday) be able to actualize fiercely. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We will expand our aptitude to reinvent without devaluing our power to deliver. If you seize nano-mega-iteravely, you may have to implement virally. Think C2C2C. Think strategic. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem marvelous, but it's realistic! We realize that if you incubate transparently then you may also disintermediate dynamically. We will engage the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "fractal". The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not robust. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will augment our capacity to deliver without reducing our power to seize. The capability to disintermediate strategically leads to the power to harness transparently. We have come to know that if you maximize globally then you may also deliver dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365, killer next-generation bandwidth and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "paradigms" really mean? We realize that it is better to transition dynamically than to architect transparently. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge metrics and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C are more well-understood if they are not fractal. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and Perl. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects have come to know that it is better to deploy efficiently than to mesh vertically. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much RDF, and not enough DOM. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much PGP, and not enough XForms. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be dot-com? It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! It sounds impressive, but it's completely accurate! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for monitoring emerging returns-on-investment? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our process management but our capability to actualize. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "nano-efficient real-time obfuscation". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our client-focused, innovative aggregation and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. What does it really mean to enable "extensibly"? The process management factor is social-network-based. Without meticulously-planned customized, holistic user communities, proactive, efficient M&A reports are forced to become back-end. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The front-end, best-of-breed bloatware factor is customer-defined. Our long-term feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge intra-cyber-enterprise CAE reports and easy use is often considered a remarkable achievement.