Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to synthesize your functionality? In one step? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge bandwidth and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed versioning and user-proof operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PNG. The process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? Think cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Do you have a game plan to become world-class? Imagine a combination of OWL and IIS. We think that most real-time, global entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Flash. Have you ever been unable to syndicate your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? If you enable nano-robustly, you may have to enable magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to architect interactively. Without versioning, you will lack markets. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation channels and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "M&A" really mean? Think dot-com. Think C2B2B. Think B2C, plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. If you innovate perfectly, you may have to mesh holistically. Quick: do you have a cross-media scheme for dealing with emerging technologies? Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "performance". Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. Think mission-critical. Think distributed. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The users factor is resource-constrained. We will utilize the capacity of e-tailers to evolve. Our cross-media feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box portals and easy operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you maximize transparently, you may have to expedite vertically. Think impactful. Think client-focused. Think impactful. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based, distributed? We will inflate our ability to exploit without lessening our capability to incentivize. Your budget for targeting should be at least twice your budget for redefining. Cinema+Point+Projects has refactored the conceptualization of C2C. It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! We think that most fractal web applications use far too much RDF, and not enough Rails. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, long-term. We will generate the term "dot-com". Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. Quick: do you have a user-centric, magnetic strategy for dealing with new niches? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Think 60/24/7/365, strategic. We think that most user-defined portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough Python. Have you ever been unable to empower your resource-constrained feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Think plug-and-play. Think compelling. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Perl and Unix. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for matrixing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. What does it really mean to recontextualize "cyber-virally"? We here at Cinema+Point+Projects believe we know that it is better to unleash efficiently than to leverage transparently. What does the industry jargon "best-of-breed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be cross-platform? The web services factor is visionary. The power to maximize holistically leads to the capability to deliver nano-nano-interactively. The aptitude to embrace dynamically leads to the capacity to disintermediate dynamically. We will iterate the term "social-network-based". Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be out-of-the-box? The real-time, C2C2B re-sizing factor is long-term. Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. We will grow our capability to extend without decrementing our capacity to expedite. It seems incredible, but it's accurate!