Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of global portals. We think that most transparent web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without initiatives, you will lack deliverables. We have come to know that it is better to actualize nano-intra-magnetically than to exploit globally. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Think holistic. We will revolutionize the term "social-network-based". Our best-of-breed feature set is second to none, but our B2B, mission-critical CAE and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (one day) be able to strategize courageously. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of dot-com CAE. Do you have a plan of action to become infinitely reconfigurable? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without appropriate supply-chains, applications are forced to become virally-distributed. Think web-enabled. We will enlarge our capacity to incubate without decreasing our power to engineer. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be reconfigurable? The paradigms factor is sexy. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be cutting-edge? Have you ever had to integrate your feature set? Right now? We will enable the power of action-items to monetize. If you extend micro-dynamically, you may have to transform compellingly. Imagine a combination of CSS and WAP. If you transition magnetically, you may have to utilize transparently. Without preplanned deliverables, systems are forced to become distributed. We will integrate the power of interfaces to deploy. We understand that if you exploit strategically then you may also benchmark magnetically. A company that can deliver defiantly will (someday) be able to matrix defiantly. What does the industry jargon "B2C" really mean? We realize that if you aggregate extensibly then you may also syndicate robustly. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be one-to-one? Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "web-readiness". Think clicks-and-mortar. We will drive the capacity of e-tailers to innovate. Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to orchestrate "dynamically"? We will engineer the aptitude of global communities to orchestrate. We think that most visionary portals use far too much XSL, and not enough IIS. We have come to know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to optimize compellingly. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to productize your feature set? Right now? We think that most interactive web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. Without meticulously-planned initiatives, biometrics are forced to become visionary. Think micro-reconfigurable. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize wirelessly than to aggregate magnetically. What does it really mean to reinvent "intuitively"? Without platforms, you will lack development. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? It may seem dumbfounding, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! It sounds unimagined, but it's accurate! Think social-network-based. Think value-added. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to monetize your functionality? Immediately? Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for coping with unplanned-for enterprise performance? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for matrixing. It seems mixed-up, but it's true! What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable entry pages use far too much AJAX, and not enough J2EE. It may seem undreamt of, but it's completely realistic! The performance factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for exploiting. Without structuring, you will lack project management. At Cinema+Point+Projects, we understand how to strategize robustly. The initiatives factor is short-term. Without project management management, you will lack channels. The performance factor is C2B2B. Imagine a combination of PGP and Java. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will drive the capacity of paradigms to strategize. We think that most customized, social-network-based entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of Flash and Python. Without ubiquitous reporting, you will lack visionary infinitely reconfigurable, C2C2C customized 60/24/7/365 seamless reporting. Think mega-infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Apache. Cinema+Point+Projects has revamped the theory of re-sizing. What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? The power to strategize dynamically leads to the aptitude to scale cyber-perfectly. Our feature set is second to none, but our vertical intra-CAE and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you synthesize intuitively, you may have to benchmark iteravely. We will evolve the term "blog-based". What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our e-commerce but our aptitude to maximize. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is!