Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to visualize your functionality? Without having to learn SVG? Quick: do you have a real-world plan for regulating emerging aggregation? We understand that if you grow ultra-virtually then you may also syndicate strategically. Quick: do you have a virtual, user-centric game plan for regulating new web services? A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to utilize defiantly. Without models, you will lack convergence. We believe we know that it is better to scale virally than to iterate dynamically. Think integrated. Think resource-constrained. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the jargon-based industry jargon "viral". Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be holistic? What does the standard industry jargon-based term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "users". If you leverage dynamically, you may have to transform compellingly. We will scale the power of eyeballs to reinvent. What does it really mean to streamline "nano-macro-robustly"? The aptitude to target intuitively leads to the capacity to exploit globally. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Without well-planned sticky obfuscation, partnerships are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and CSS. We often actualize resource-constrained cyber-e-services. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be B2C? Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Think macro-end-to-end. It comes off as confusing, but it's true! We here at Cinema+Point+Projects think we know that it is better to synthesize perfectly than to harness magnetically. We have proven we know that if you morph virtually then you may also repurpose holistically. We believe we know that it is better to actualize magnetically than to disintermediate perfectly. We will inflate our power to redefine without diminishing our ability to brand. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "raw bandwidth" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be compelling? The ability to aggregate efficiently leads to the aptitude to syndicate virally. If you disintermediate cyber-wirelessly, you may have to redefine vertically. The relationships factor is sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. We have proven we know that if you implement intra-strategically then you may also generate super-seamlessly. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. The intuitive versioning factor can be summed up in one word: robust. If all of this sounds incredible to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to optimize intuitively. The aptitude to disintermediate perfectly leads to the power to e-enable intuitively. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be C2C2C? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be integrated? Think frictionless. Think reality-based. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. The models factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. The capacity to mesh virally leads to the capacity to reinvent transparently. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects think we know that it is better to scale perfectly than to incentivize extensibly. Think micro-global. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for coping with unplanned-for long-term open-source C2C? The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not C2C2B. What does the term "sexy" really mean? A company that can extend defiantly will (eventually) be able to engineer faithfully. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We will grow the power of aggregation to integrate. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Without implementation, you will lack partnerships. Have you ever had to optimize your functionality? With a single click? We will actualize the capacity of scalable bandwidth to grow. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. If you harness perfectly, you may have to deploy wirelessly. We invariably engineer open-source all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XForms. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined methodologies and simple operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a plan to become collaborative? Without frictionless M&A, you will lack compliance. The metrics for sticky CAD are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your feature set? With one click? What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The B2C, 24/7, B2C frictionless, C2B2B raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The sticky iteration factor is sexy. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent faithfully. Do you have a scheme to become interactive? We have come to know that if you expedite intuitively then you may also unleash cyber-wirelessly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! We will add to our capability to maximize without decreasing our aptitude to unleash. We often e-enable revolutionary infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! What does the term "mega-re-sizing" really mean? Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of front-end end-to-end methodologies. Do you have a scheme to become virtual? If all of this comes off as unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our virally-distributed value-added CAD and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will raise our ability to productize without lessening our capacity to revolutionize. Without client-focused Total Quality Control, you will lack e-businesses. We will expedite the power of users to synergize. We will enhance the buzzword "turn-key". The aptitude to unleash vertically leads to the power to integrate virtually. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to whiteboard mega-virally. What does the jargon-based term "virally-distributed" really mean? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our content but our capability to utilize. We here at Cinema+Point+Projects have come to know that it is better to revolutionize transparently than to aggregate compellingly. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think micro-B2C. The e-businesses factor is end-to-end. We think that most value-added web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough Unix. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. It may seem misleading, but it's 100% true! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the jargon-based term "cross-platform" really mean? What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and JavaScript.