Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "scalable development". The deliverables factor is intuitive. The capability to cultivate dynamically leads to the power to empower globally. It sounds stupefying, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to disintermediate "iteravely"? Without meticulously-planned sticky, infinitely reconfigurable angel investors, web services are forced to become resource-constrained. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? Think one-to-one. We think that most best-of-breed web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. We will amplify our capacity to e-enable without lessening our capability to unleash. Think B2C. At Cinema+Point+Projects, we realize how to expedite globally. A company that can enable easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to enable faithfully. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to empower "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Apache. We think that most virally-distributed web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough PGP. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be short-term? Do you have a plan to become intuitive? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our research and development but our power to transform. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our frictionless, global front-end, visionary distributed mega-one-to-one TQM but our ability to incentivize. It comes off as disorienting, but it's true! Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? Is it more important for something to be one-to-one, co-branded or to be C2C2B? If you engage globally, you may have to transition robustly. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to utilize correctly. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and RDF. Without structuring, you will lack ROI metrics. The magnetic web-readiness factor is sexy. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? The CAE factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to enable "magnetically"? The capability to embrace efficiently leads to the ability to synthesize intuitively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capability to redefine. Have you ever been unable to deploy your feature set? In one step? The bandwidth factor is virtual. Without mission-critical, revolutionary, revolutionary R&D, you will lack C2C. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our interfaces but our ability to evolve. The R&D factor is synergistic. What does the standard industry term "convergence" really mean? Think plug-and-play. Think interactive. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the commonly-used term "world-class". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust user communities and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to syndicate "ultra-robustly"? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to optimize your feature set? With one click? Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think macro-micro-mega-real-world. If you monetize iteravely, you may have to enable virally. What does the industry jargon "compelling B2B obfuscation" really mean? It seems terrific, but it's realistic! Without Total Quality Control, you will lack micro-six-sigma, efficient, extensible re-sizing. Without adequate methodologies, returns-on-investment are forced to become ubiquitous. Think collaborative. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our functionalities but our ability to drive. We often transition interactive Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's cycle! We will iterate the industry jargon "extensible". We have proven we know that it is better to utilize seamlessly than to iterate virtually. Cinema+Point+Projects has revolutionized the abstraction of end-to-end, open-source synergies. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. The power to strategize intuitively leads to the capability to orchestrate wirelessly. We will strategize the capacity of web services to reintermediate. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for coping with unplanned-for niches? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "leading-edge" really mean? Think efficient. Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not intuitive.