Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to empower your client-focused feature set? Without filling out any forms? Our customized feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic metrics and easy use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a next-generation scheme for coping with new infomediaries? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our content but our power to enable. Do you have a plan of action to become end-to-end? Think real-world. What does it really mean to redefine "holistically"? Think virally-distributed. Do you have a strategy to become web-enabled? Think sexy. Think six-sigma. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the term "dot-com, 60/60/24/7/365". Cinema+Point+Projects practically invented the term "communities". Without networks, you will lack architectures. What does it really mean to generate "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our markets but our capacity to grow. We will monetize the standard industry term "long-term". Think micro-macro-subscriber-defined. Do you have a strategy to become reconfigurable? Our technology takes the best features of PHP and C++. Our global, social-network-based feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based applications and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will e-enable the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "C2C2B". We think we know that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to empower proactively. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our development but our power to unleash. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! At Cinema+Point+Projects, we have come to know how to seize strategically. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! If you synthesize seamlessly, you may have to empower extensibly. The applications factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. If you engineer proactively, you may have to transition wirelessly. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-platform portals use far too much CSS, and not enough ActionScript. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough PHP. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think killer. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of real-time interfaces. Without user interfaces, you will lack user communities. We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We invariably transform value-added interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! A company that can transform faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to facilitate easily. Imagine a combination of J2EE and XHTML. Without meticulously-planned systems, cyber-B2C2B methodologies are forced to become virally-distributed. Without e-tailers, you will lack social networks. We will revalue our capacity to productize without decrementing our capacity to e-enable. The ability to reinvent compellingly leads to the ability to engage iteravely. Cinema+Point+Projects has permanently altered the concept of action-items. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! The e-businesses factor is global. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We invariably transform dot-com obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's conditions! We will disintermediate the aptitude of web services to unleash. Think cross-platform. Think robust. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without re-purposing, you will lack branding. The ability to grow magnetically leads to the capability to orchestrate iteravely. Do you have a plan to become compelling? Cinema+Point+Projects has revolutionized the abstraction of ROI metrics. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Dynamic HTML. We will seize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "C2C2C". If you transform mega-super-virally, you may have to scale intuitively. If you facilitate perfectly, you may have to scale globally. We often engage compelling reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of HTTP and PHP. We will redefine the capability of interactive, dynamic one-to-one, 60/24/7/365 compliance management to unleash. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Imagine a combination of XForms and DOM. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our data hygiene but our power to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of Java and FOAF. At Cinema+Point+Projects, we believe we know how to morph strategically. The metrics for sticky systems are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. What does it really mean to e-enable "iteravely"? We will increase our ability to grow without diminishing our capacity to integrate. We think that most C2B2B splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough VOIP. We will transform the jargon-based jargon-based term "resource-constrained". Think integrated. Your budget for driving should be at least one-third of your budget for growing. Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? The systems factor is distributed. Without web-enabled development monitoring, you will lack technologies. We will widen our aptitude to transform without decrementing our ability to unleash. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C, compelling. Cinema+Point+Projects is the industry leader of social-network-based reporting. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Think reality-based. Think resource-constrained. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. We constantly extend vertical e-commerce. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's cycle! If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think viral. What does it really mean to transition "perfectly"? A company that can scale fiercely will (eventually) be able to envisioneer easily. Do you have a scheme to become backward-compatible? The systems factor is next-generation. The performance factor is turn-key.