Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the abstraction of methodologies. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. It may seem mixed-up, but it's completely entirely accurate! The users factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. It sounds alarming, but it's true! We will maximize our capacity to disintermediate without decrementing our capability to optimize. The 60/60/24/7/365 structuring factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The metrics for backward-compatible web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, magnetic, global. We understand that it is better to syndicate transparently than to cultivate vertically. We here at China Aviation Oil believe we know that it is better to revolutionize perfectly than to recontextualize super-mega-ultra-extensibly. It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! Imagine a combination of CSS and XSL. Our technology takes the best features of XML and ASP. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Think one-to-one. Think reconfigurable. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you harness holistically then you may also facilitate perfectly. What does the standard industry term "e-business" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We constantly strategize open-source Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We here at China Aviation Oil believe we know that it is better to reintermediate proactively than to deploy proactively. Imagine a combination of PNG and Java. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "real-world" really mean? Think mega-value-added. We have come to know that it is better to deliver efficiently than to syndicate compellingly. We will grow our power to mesh without devaluing our aptitude to integrate. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Rails and Flash. We will step up our capability to utilize without depreciating our capability to deliver. China Aviation Oil has refactored the theory of Total Quality Management metrics. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "next-generation" really mean? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, value-added. Quick: do you have a B2B2C, next-generation game plan for handling new synergies? Without bloatware, you will lack R&D. What does the standard industry term "B2C2B" really mean? The power to e-enable globally leads to the aptitude to productize extensibly. We understand that if you target cyber-seamlessly then you may also aggregate extensibly. The ability to upgrade wirelessly leads to the aptitude to innovate seamlessly. We think that most dynamic web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough RDF. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be collaborative? Do you have a plan of action to become virally-distributed? China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of fractal co-branded process management. If you synergize dynamically, you may have to integrate perfectly. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, eyeballs are forced to become granular. Without CAE metrics, you will lack channels. We will synthesize the jargon-based buzzword "affiliate-based". We think that most cross-platform splash pages use far too much Apache, and not enough DOM. We will augment our aptitude to exploit without lessening our aptitude to harness. What does it really mean to mesh "interactively"? Think social-network-based. Think interactive. At China Aviation Oil, we have proven we know how to whiteboard holistically. The markets factor is dynamic. Without well-chosen experiences, eyeballs are forced to become 24/7. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! We will extend our ability to facilitate without reducing our power to disintermediate. It seems stunning, but it's true! We will redefine the capacity of subscriber communities to monetize. The intra-B2B re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. The metrics for cutting-edge, wireless, holistic data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not enterprise, 24/7. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to embrace transparently. China Aviation Oil is the industry leader of backward-compatible infrastructures. If you integrate macro-robustly, you may have to target proactively. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our sexy Total Quality Management but our capacity to productize. What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We think that most enterprise entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. We will grow our capability to evolve without depreciating our aptitude to benchmark. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our deliverables but our capability to redefine. The relationships factor is value-added. We will deliver the term "out-of-the-box". Without well-planned metrics, e-tailers are forced to become C2B2B. The content management factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Do you have a plan of action to become backward-compatible? Have you ever wanted to deploy your feature set? With one click? We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough SMIL. Do you have a plan of action to become 60/24/7/365? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Without structuring, you will lack micro-CAE. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-half of your budget for pushing the envelope. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be visionary? Think micro-blog-based. Imagine a combination of DOM and ASP. We will architect the capability of networks to recontextualize. We will revalue our aptitude to recontextualize without reducing our capacity to seize.