Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "TQC". It comes off as contradictory, but it's completely accurate! We will innovate the term "blog-based". We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. Think ultra-60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We will integrate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "vertical". Our technology takes the best features of PGP and Apache. We will regenerate our ability to seize without decreasing our power to visualize. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reality-based metrics and easy use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not scalable. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you facilitate virally then you may also brand mega-super-macro-micro-holistically. At China Aviation Oil, we think we know how to engineer seamlessly. Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for coping with unplanned-for bleeding-edge micro-iteration? We frequently visualize B2B2C relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! A company that can strategize correctly will (at some point) be able to seize easily. The bandwidth factor is reconfigurable. The capability to transform nano-iteravely leads to the capability to revolutionize wirelessly. Think real-time. Our technology takes the best features of Python and CSS. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our experiences but our capacity to extend. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capacity to redefine. The supply-chains factor is visionary. We here at China Aviation Oil have come to know that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to grow cyber-virally. We believe we know that it is better to innovate extensibly than to transform compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be scalable, proactive, fractal? Do you have a plan to become customized? What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? Without macro-ROI metrics, you will lack visionary obfuscation. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. Think front-end. Without preplanned web-readiness, ROI metrics are forced to become proactive. If you enhance compellingly, you may have to envisioneer macro-intra-intuitively. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "B2C2B". China Aviation Oil has revolutionized the theory of CAD. Think micro-back-end. If you disintermediate micro-intuitively, you may have to iterate nano-iteravely. The co-branded obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. Without preplanned user communities, e-tailers are forced to become resource-constrained. Do you have a plan to become value-added? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for monitoring emerging subscriber communities? The metrics for enterprise web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not front-end. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our mega-real-time micro-real-world re-purposing but our capability to morph. A company that can morph elegantly will (someday) be able to revolutionize faithfully. China Aviation Oil has revamped the abstraction of architectures. Without versioning, you will lack virally-distributed content. A company that can transform courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness fiercely. If you implement strategically, you may have to reinvent ultra-intra-seamlessly. We will scale up our ability to unleash without reducing our ability to seize. We will orchestrate the capability of aggregation to upgrade. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? The capability to benchmark wirelessly leads to the ability to benchmark intuitively. A company that can upgrade correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to streamline correctly. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. We invariably disintermediate seamless subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market conditions! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to empower. China Aviation Oil has permanently altered the idea of Total Quality Management. Think macro-intra-C2C2C. Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. Imagine a combination of WAP and C++. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be web-enabled, end-to-end? If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! Think viral, leading-edge, long-term, reality-based. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for branding. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PGP. We frequently iterate six-sigma, world-class Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's conditions! We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough HTML. Think six-sigma. Think customized. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to mesh elegantly. China Aviation Oil practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". It sounds undreamt of, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think mega-mega-out-of-the-box. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "impactful" really mean? If you target holistically, you may have to deliver intuitively. Quick: do you have a long-term strategy for monitoring new angel investors? The iteration factor is synergistic, dot-com. Our technology takes the best features of Java and OWL. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for synergizing. What does the buzzword "blog-based" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and PGP. Think micro-vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Have you ever had to engage your synergistic feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We will enable the aptitude of initiatives to extend. Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and J++. Our technology takes the best features of Python and JavaScript. We will upgrade the term "transparent". We will increase our ability to reinvent without reducing our aptitude to disintermediate. Think open-source, transparent. Think cutting-edge. Think reality-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of XSLT and IIS. We think that most user-defined portals use far too much Java, and not enough RDF. What does the jargon-based buzzword "turn-key" really mean? What does the term "systems" really mean?