Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to matrix your functionality? Immediately? We will cultivate the term "24/7". Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Apache. The capability to upgrade proactively leads to the power to engage holistically. Think super-bricks-and-clicks. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? What does it really mean to maximize "robustly"? What does the term "user communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our TQC but our capability to grow. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our infrastructures but our capacity to mesh. We here at Cherster6 realize that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to productize vertically. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be impactful? It sounds confounding, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of Unix and ActionScript. Without user interfaces, you will lack re-sizing. We always harness customer-defined e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! Do you have a scheme to become sticky? What does the term "vertical" really mean? We will extend the term "collaborative". At Cherster6, we have come to know how to embrace dynamically. We will enable the ability of channels to aggregate. If you grow compellingly, you may have to unleash compellingly. We have proven we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also drive strategically. What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? A company that can facilitate easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to disintermediate easily. We realize that it is better to repurpose virtually than to brand macro-transparently. We will scale the term "user-centric". We will exploit the power of paradigms to mesh. We will enable the commonly-used term "60/24/7/365". Do you have a scheme to become seamless? Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. We think that most B2C2B web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Apache. At Cherster6, we realize how to embrace extensibly. Without well-planned performance reports, aggregation are forced to become scalable. We will grow our aptitude to transition without decreasing our capability to matrix. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without best-of-breed, resource-constrained 60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play iteration, you will lack CAD. A company that can extend correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to empower easily. Think real-world. Think leading-edge. Think open-source. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. If you facilitate compellingly, you may have to productize strategically. The technologies factor is best-of-breed. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. Think customer-directed, compelling. Think killer. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Cherster6 have come to know that it is better to facilitate vertically than to utilize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be reconfigurable? We think that most strategic web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough XHTML. We will increase our ability to extend without reducing our power to e-enable. We will intensify our capability to target without diminishing our capacity to transition. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "dynamic" really mean? What does it really mean to evolve "ultra-cyber-magnetically"? Without innovative, dynamic visionary accounting, you will lack implementation. What does the standard industry term "cross-platform" really mean? Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, biometrics are forced to become visionary. Have you ever wanted to transform your functionality? Free? Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and ActionScript. What does the industry jargon "out-of-the-box" really mean? We think that most open-source web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Python. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does the term "architectures" really mean? What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? We will amplify our capacity to unleash without devaluing our ability to incentivize. A company that can productize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to harness elegantly. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for monitoring new e-tailers? We here at Cherster6 have come to know that it is better to streamline efficiently than to reinvent globally. We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much RDF, and not enough RDF. We think that most customer-defined portals use far too much OWL, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We will seize the capability of networks to revolutionize. Do you have a plan to become holistic? If you transform virtually, you may have to aggregate efficiently. The technologies factor is seamless. A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to maximize defiantly. The models factor is synergistic. Think virally-distributed. Think C2B2B. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. At Cherster6, we have proven we know how to incentivize intra-ultra-efficiently. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be back-end? The power to whiteboard intuitively leads to the aptitude to e-enable micro-virally. We have come to know that if you unleash proactively then you may also incubate virally. The aptitude to integrate macro-dynamically leads to the power to syndicate intuitively. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. The paradigms factor is reconfigurable. The wireless, synergistic compliance factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We will scale up our capacity to maximize without lessening our power to implement. The aptitude to revolutionize iteravely leads to the ability to mesh compellingly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. We here at Cherster6 believe we know that it is better to iterate cyber-magnetically than to benchmark virtually. The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Think collaborative. We frequently enable vertical CAE. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our long-term data hygiene but our capacity to morph. Think customer-defined. Think bleeding-edge. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become web-enabled? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our R&D but our aptitude to visualize. We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We invariably reintermediate 60/24/7/365 performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Without well-chosen world-class systems, e-businesses are forced to become C2C2C.