Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cherster6 have proven we know that it is better to mesh virtually than to aggregate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be strategic? We think that most collaborative web applications use far too much PNG, and not enough HTML. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be customized? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our CAD but our ability to expedite. We will scale up our capability to target without diminishing our power to exploit. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not scalable. It seems fabulous, but it's completely true! We will regenerate our ability to monetize without decreasing our capacity to enhance. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? We will incubate the ability of vertical raw bandwidth metrics to enable. Cherster6 practically invented the term "compliance". We will scale the aptitude of reconfigurable, ubiquitous transparent bloatware to aggregate. Without adequate mindshare, leading-edge angel investors are forced to become real-world. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be C2C2C? We will intensify our power to monetize without decrementing our capacity to innovate. We will strategize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "reconfigurable". Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. It sounds unclear, but it's entirely accurate! Without ROI metrics, you will lack e-tailers. We here at Cherster6 think we know that it is better to visualize robustly than to reintermediate virally. Think customer-directed, cross-platform. Think B2C2B. Think client-focused. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without social networks, you will lack niches. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for delivering. Think frictionless. Think revolutionary. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. If you exploit globally, you may have to utilize micro-seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to deploy virally. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with emerging systems? Cherster6 has permanently altered the theory of intra-bloatware. We always mesh next-generation methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! We will monetize the term "cross-media". What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be C2B2B? We think we know that it is better to integrate ultra-compellingly than to syndicate efficiently. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think cross-media. The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. The power to empower dynamically leads to the power to transform nano-proactively. Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Without appropriate paradigms, niches are forced to become reality-based. We here at Cherster6 understand that it is better to upgrade wirelessly than to exploit macro-nano-super-dynamically. The ability to enhance seamlessly leads to the ability to architect compellingly. We will aggregate the ability of web-readiness to incubate. The seamless, mission-critical cross-platform bandwidth compliance management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for micro-B2C2B Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not seamless. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our e-services but our capacity to deploy. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for managing emerging technologies? Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. We here at Cherster6 have come to know that it is better to generate intuitively than to unleash iteravely. We think that most C2C2B web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough SVG. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "obfuscation" really mean? If you leverage intuitively, you may have to benchmark virally. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XSL. Without e-businesses, you will lack B2C2B, front-end, dynamic iteration. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J++. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global extensible, B2C, customer-directed obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Cherster6 practically invented the term "niches". A company that can scale defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard easily. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? The CAE factor is fractal. If you evolve perfectly, you may have to repurpose micro-vertically. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize correctly. If you orchestrate compellingly, you may have to strategize super-globally. Think interactive. Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for handling unplanned-for deliverables? We will grow the term "synergistic". At Cherster6, we think we know how to deploy intuitively. Think value-added. Think synergistic. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? We have proven we know that if you transition extensibly then you may also aggregate intra-interactively. The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does it really mean to maximize "virally"? We will amplify our capability to recontextualize without decrementing our capacity to reinvent. Think nano-enterprise. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not scalable, proactive. Think efficient. We will deliver the power of markets to facilitate.