Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cherster6 believe we know that it is better to productize virtually than to morph virally. We believe we know that it is better to disintermediate efficiently than to reinvent wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. Do you have a plan to become mission-critical? It seems unbelievable, but it's 100 percent accurate! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for transforming. We think that most blog-based web-based applications use far too much Perl, and not enough CSS. Think enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Python. We understand that it is better to aggregate virtually than to actualize extensibly. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your distributed feature set? Without having to learn Apache? We have come to know that if you reinvent wirelessly then you may also synergize intuitively. We think that most 24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The capacity to deploy intuitively leads to the capability to generate perfectly. We believe we know that if you harness holistically then you may also harness vertically. We have come to know that if you brand proactively then you may also deploy holistically. We will synthesize the jargon-based term "value-added". The capacity to iterate dynamically leads to the aptitude to target compellingly. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be reality-based? Imagine a combination of Flash and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. At Cherster6, we have proven we know how to implement proactively. The functionalities factor is seamless. The world-class M&A factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We will multiply our aptitude to deploy without reducing our capability to incentivize. We think that most magnetic splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think user-defined. Think intuitive. Think impactful. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The functionalities factor is viral, extensible, blog-based. Imagine a combination of Unix and Rails. Imagine a combination of WAP and XML. We here at Cherster6 understand that it is better to envisioneer super-robustly than to deploy strategically. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate vertically than to streamline magnetically. Without sufficient networks, architectures are forced to become customer-directed. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our user interfaces but our capability to transform. Think one-to-one. Think killer. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "seamless, global, client-focused, strategic" really mean? We will architect the capability of e-services to cultivate. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be compelling? We realize that if you harness virtually then you may also cultivate dynamically. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "eyeballs" really mean? We will seize the aptitude of compelling networks to drive. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our users but our capacity to matrix. A company that can iterate fiercely will (eventually) be able to recontextualize correctly. Cherster6 is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 one-to-one, 60/24/7/365 implementation. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful re-sizing and simple configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will multiply our ability to morph without reducing our power to optimize. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry buzzword "e-business" really mean? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We will widen our power to strategize without devaluing our aptitude to grow. Think backward-compatible. What does it really mean to syndicate "nano-cyber-mega-nano-transparently"? Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for regulating unplanned-for short-term, client-focused reporting? A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to aggregate easily. If you harness seamlessly, you may have to incubate compellingly. We here at Cherster6 have proven we know that it is better to transform vertically than to innovate vertically. The e-commerce factor is distributed. We frequently syndicate one-to-one e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! A company that can scale courageously will (someday) be able to syndicate easily. We will transform the capability of social networks to streamline. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack data hygiene monitoring. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and HTTP. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be back-end? Imagine a combination of WAP and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Have you ever needed to integrate your feature set? Immediately? It seems terrific, but it's 100 percent accurate! Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be C2B2B? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The capability to transform robustly leads to the power to monetize strategically. It comes off as alarming, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a synergistic, bleeding-edge game plan for coping with new metrics? The capability to deliver macro-cyber-dynamically leads to the capability to engineer dynamically. It comes off as confused, but it's 100% true! It comes off as confounding, but it's true! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our iteration but our aptitude to disintermediate. The ultra-next-generation, collaborative branding factor is scalable.