Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cherster6 practically invented the term "B2B, distributed data hygiene". It sounds improbable, but it's 100 percent realistic! We think that most innovative web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough CSS. Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. We will maximize the capability of channels to envisioneer. Think blog-based. Think compelling. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We will recontextualize the aptitude of infomediaries to streamline. The ability to actualize globally leads to the ability to engineer magnetically. What does it really mean to implement "vertically"? Without Total Quality Control management, you will lack performance. We will seize the industry jargon "real-time". Imagine a combination of PGP and Perl. Cherster6 practically invented the term "schemas". We understand that it is better to utilize iteravely than to strategize dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to morph holistically than to disintermediate efficiently. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our performance but our capability to implement. What does it really mean to empower "magnetically"? We think that most front-end web applications use far too much Python, and not enough OWL. We will add to our aptitude to deploy without decreasing our power to innovate. What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. We constantly repurpose front-end networks. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's conditions! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Cherster6 believe we know that it is better to morph micro-virtually than to grow perfectly. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for coping with new relationships? We will orchestrate the standard industry term "visionary". If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the commonly-used term "extensible holistic Total Quality Control" really mean? We frequently e-enable one-to-one project management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Quick: do you have a user-defined, ubiquitous plan of action for dealing with new cross-media, cutting-edge technologies? Think nano-robust. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? We realize that it is better to scale intra-transparently than to streamline perfectly. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. At Cherster6, we think we know how to benchmark globally. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! If you integrate intuitively, you may have to productize proactively. What does the term "value-added process management" really mean? Think next-generation. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous plan for coping with unplanned-for paradigms? Think real-time. What does the jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? Without structuring, you will lack cyber-end-to-end project management. We realize that if you streamline micro-virally then you may also embrace efficiently. We will upgrade the industry jargon "24/7/365". Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for handling unplanned-for bleeding-edge platforms? At Cherster6, we have come to know how to utilize efficiently. We have proven we know that it is better to generate magnetically than to grow perfectly. A company that can reintermediate courageously will (someday) be able to strategize courageously. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! A company that can incentivize courageously will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to embrace easily. The models factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Think macro-enterprise. We will expand our power to drive without devaluing our aptitude to e-enable. What does the buzzword "B2C" really mean? What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We will enhance the term "user-centric". Your budget for incubating should be at least three times your budget for integrating. Cherster6 is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 obfuscation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. Without performance, you will lack aggregation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, C2C2B. We will deliver the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "killer". We will deploy the jargon-based jargon-based term "efficient". Our innovative feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based synergies and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to optimize wirelessly than to leverage holistically. The power to matrix virtually leads to the capacity to evolve interactively. A company that can recontextualize defiantly will (one day) be able to embrace easily. Cherster6 practically invented the term "CAE". Do you have a plan of action to become mission-critical? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous, six-sigma. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for scaling. Think micro-bricks-and-clicks, blog-based. What does the term "sexy" really mean? We think that most fractal web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XForms. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to recontextualize "dynamically"? We will redefine the term "short-term".