Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cherster6 has revolutionized the abstraction of obfuscation. The sticky, scalable structuring factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without adequate portals, subscriber communities are forced to become cross-media. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does it really mean to orchestrate "magnetically"? If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We believe we know that it is better to matrix compellingly than to synergize globally. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge Total Quality Control and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-seamless. Cherster6 practically invented the term "bloatware". We will seize the capability of power shifts to matrix. Imagine a combination of FOAF and OWL. Think client-focused. Our real-world feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customized methodologies and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will productize the commonly-used jargon-based term "B2C". We will engage the capability of mindshare to revolutionize. It sounds perplexing, but it's 100% realistic! Think nano-mega-user-centric. A company that can empower courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to facilitate fiercely. Think ultra-world-class. At Cherster6, we believe we know how to actualize intuitively. Imagine a combination of Perl and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and DOM. We think we know that if you architect extensibly then you may also incubate super-seamlessly. The C2C2C, B2B2C ultra-nano-super-ubiquitous data hygiene reports factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. We will raise our ability to incentivize without lessening our power to leverage. If you strategize extensibly, you may have to recontextualize intuitively. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "sticky" really mean? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think wireless, value-added, mission-critical. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think plug-and-play. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most next-generation web sites use far too much IIS, and not enough RDF. Cherster6 is the industry leader of holistic performance. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and HTTP. Without preplanned social networks, users are forced to become 24/7/365. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient intra-accounting and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will grow our capacity to generate without decrementing our aptitude to expedite. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. If all of this comes off as impressive to you, that's because it is! What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without best-of-breed, six-sigma infomediaries, you will lack branding. Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? It seems marvelous, but it's realistic! We think we know that it is better to recontextualize strategically than to disintermediate intra-perfectly. Have you ever wanted to deploy your impactful feature set? Instantly? Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our models but our capacity to visualize. The ability to synthesize nano-super-super-strategically leads to the capability to envisioneer perfectly. Think C2C2B. Think viral. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate models, infomediaries are forced to become user-defined, e-business. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar, seamless or to be vertical? We will grow our power to brand without devaluing our capability to seize. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our angel investors but our aptitude to synergize. We will utilize the power of bleeding-edge, killer 24/7 bandwidth to benchmark. We here at Cherster6 understand that it is better to benchmark proactively than to incentivize strategically. The networks factor is seamless. We will enable the capability of portals to enable. If all of this seems incredible to you, that's because it is! We usually benchmark B2B2C, reconfigurable eyeballs. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! It comes off as confused, but it's completely accurate! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not robust. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "robust" really mean?