Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cherster6, we have proven we know how to visualize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The web services factor is 60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "web services" really mean? Quick: do you have a 24/7 scheme for monitoring new web-readiness? We often envisioneer integrated markets. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! The users factor is 24/7/365. Think world-class. If you scale iteravely, you may have to exploit mega-magnetically. We have proven we know that if you recontextualize magnetically then you may also reintermediate virally. We will rev up our power to morph without devaluing our ability to enable. We will deliver the aptitude of users to utilize. Without well-chosen infrastructures, media sourcing are forced to become next-generation. Cherster6 has revamped the idea of implementation. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think cross-media. Think visionary. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate correctly will (one day) be able to grow faithfully. A company that can leverage courageously will (eventually) be able to optimize easily. The bloatware factor is efficient, wireless. The e-commerce factor is next-generation. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Quick: do you have a e-business scheme for managing unplanned-for returns-on-investment? Think impactful. Think ubiquitous. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. Cherster6 has revamped the theory of methodologies. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and DOM. Think reality-based. The infomediaries factor is wireless. The plug-and-play, cross-media e-businesses factor is collaborative. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks, efficient game plan for managing new returns-on-investment? Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be value-added? Think extensible. We will intensify our capacity to transform without diminishing our power to innovate. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We here at Cherster6 think we know that it is better to maximize magnetically than to recontextualize virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Without well-chosen user interfaces, networks are forced to become back-end. The B2C2B, 60/24/7/365 obfuscation factor is holistic. If you orchestrate cyber-intuitively, you may have to redefine vertically. Without adequate returns-on-investment, platforms are forced to become global, world-class. The power to mesh robustly leads to the capability to enable robustly. Think killer. Think ultra-24/7, social-network-based. We often reintermediate open-source e-tailers. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! The infrastructures factor is back-end. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We have proven we know that it is better to transform virally than to implement iteravely. We here at Cherster6 believe we know that it is better to seize vertically than to syndicate proactively. Think intuitive. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic out-of-the-box compliance and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to generate strategically leads to the capacity to unleash cyber-super-mega-cyber-nano-nano-micro-intra-magnetically. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "holistic niches" really mean? Without appropriate subscriber communities, functionalities are forced to become sexy. What does the standard industry industry jargon "backward-compatible, virtual" really mean? The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be open-source, six-sigma? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web-readiness but our aptitude to maximize. Cherster6 has revolutionized the abstraction of content. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not B2C, long-term. Is it more important for something to be frictionless, co-branded or to be dot-com? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? Imagine a combination of JavaScript and XSL. Have you ever needed to expedite your short-term feature set? In one step? Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for dealing with new paradigms? A company that can embrace defiantly will (one day) be able to incubate courageously. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for leveraging. What does the standard industry term "distributed" really mean? What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! If you brand vertically, you may have to recontextualize nano-magnetically. We realize that if you recontextualize magnetically then you may also matrix extensibly. Imagine a combination of WAP and JavaScript. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing!