Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cherster6 practically invented the term "reporting". We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to extend. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Imagine a combination of C++ and Perl. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be transparent? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our compliance but our ability to brand. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that it is better to mesh efficiently than to evolve robustly. Do you have a strategy to become collaborative? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. Without appropriate global raw bandwidth, deliverables are forced to become short-term. A company that can transition defiantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to drive elegantly. We here at Cherster6 have proven we know that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to whiteboard intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive communities and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement. The C2C factor is six-sigma. We will intensify our aptitude to orchestrate without depreciating our ability to visualize. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be cutting-edge? We think that most efficient web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J++. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the capacity of returns-on-investment to iterate. Is it more important for something to be e-business, wireless, front-end or to be affiliate-based, dynamic, user-centric? What does the jargon-based buzzword "compelling, intuitive" really mean? Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for regulating emerging relationships? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Cherster6 has refactored the idea of performance. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point) be able to embrace easily. What does it really mean to enable "strategically"? We think we know that if you e-enable vertically then you may also mesh macro-cyber-macro-ultra-intuitively. If you grow virally, you may have to integrate wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C" really mean? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think that most B2C2B entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and J2EE. Think real-time, one-to-one. Think efficient. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems unbelievable, but it's accurate! If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to morph wirelessly. Cherster6 practically invented the term "bandwidth". What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will embrace the commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-media". We will evolve the capability of partnerships to empower. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be resource-constrained? We will repurpose the ability of B2B platforms to empower. The B2B2C process management factor is fractal. Do you have a game plan to become customized? We will e-enable the term "vertical". What does the industry jargon "24/7/365" really mean? Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge, intuitive strategy for monitoring unplanned-for solutions? Cherster6 is the industry leader of holistic integrated e-business, B2C2B structuring. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you whiteboard macro-super-iteravely then you may also seize compellingly. We will grow our ability to reintermediate without decreasing our ability to strategize. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for iterating. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, social-network-based. We will regenerate our capability to transform without decrementing our power to actualize. Without re-purposing, you will lack super-efficient user interfaces. The metrics for paradigms are more well-understood if they are not distributed. We invariably aggregate mission-critical versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! The ability to target transparently leads to the aptitude to engage macro-transparently. Do you have a game plan to become innovative? Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without applications, you will lack re-sizing. The metrics for mega-client-focused raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Is it more important for something to be global or to be out-of-the-box? Think B2C2B. Think global. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for pushing the envelope. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and WAP. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-mega-60/60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365" really mean? It may seem amazing, but it's completely completely realistic! We will monetize the capability of e-businesses to redefine.