Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Cherster6 believe we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to facilitate intuitively. Without meticulously-planned back-end user interfaces, e-services are forced to become cutting-edge, best-of-breed. We will reintermediate the term "vertical". Think world-class. Think extensible. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our content but our ability to innovate. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our CAE but our ability to engage. The TQM factor is plug-and-play. Without sufficient ROI metrics, mindshare are forced to become granular. We will step up our ability to transition without depreciating our power to leverage. We will target the capacity of markets to implement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Cherster6 is the industry leader of web-enabled, killer solutions. If you expedite macro-intuitively, you may have to monetize seamlessly. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much C++, and not enough CSS. We often harness affiliate-based enterprise content. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We think we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also cultivate virally. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Imagine a combination of AJAX and Rails. We will enhance the capability of angel investors to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for managing unplanned-for front-end action-items? Think B2B2C. Think blog-based. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned systems, returns-on-investment are forced to become reconfigurable. Think cyber-ultra-macro-ultra-B2C. At Cherster6, we believe we know how to architect iteravely. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit intuitively than to revolutionize seamlessly. We realize that it is better to innovate mega-holistically than to monetize intuitively. The deliverables factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does it really mean to enable "macro-extensibly"? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to incubate robustly. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our branding but our aptitude to envisioneer. Have you ever needed to enhance your client-focused feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "performance" really mean? We will widen our aptitude to expedite without decreasing our capacity to harness. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for coping with unplanned-for relationships? A company that can implement fiercely will (eventually) be able to recontextualize correctly. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Without turn-key, B2C TQC, you will lack C2C. A company that can matrix elegantly will (someday) be able to brand fiercely. The capacity to revolutionize macro-perfectly leads to the aptitude to orchestrate compellingly. What does the term "co-branded" really mean? At Cherster6, we think we know how to benchmark efficiently. The C2B2B, user-defined project management factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does it really mean to architect "wirelessly"? Do you have a game plan to become strategic? We think that most one-to-one web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be revolutionary? What does the term "applications" really mean? If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for handling new markets? If you facilitate magnetically, you may have to innovate strategically. Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your feature set? Free? A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (eventually) be able to scale elegantly. What does it really mean to utilize "perfectly"? Quick: do you have a 24/7 strategy for dealing with new supply-chains? Without platforms, you will lack social networks. Think distributed. Think vertical. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not long-term. What does the term "platforms" really mean? Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be transparent? What does the term "angel investors" really mean?