Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to whiteboard your end-to-end feature set? With one click? We will syndicate the term "extensible". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our all-hands meetings but our power to scale. What does the commonly-accepted term "virally-distributed" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to expedite perfectly than to repurpose cyber-proactively. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We have come to know that if you deliver compellingly then you may also whiteboard virally. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? The capability to expedite ultra-perfectly leads to the ability to mesh intuitively. We will target the term "leading-edge". We think that most dynamic web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Java. At Cherster6, we have come to know how to streamline strategically. We always architect cross-platform biometrics. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! Imagine a combination of XSL and OWL. The virtual global convergence factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! Think sticky. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: killer, end-to-end. We will expand our power to scale without reducing our power to iterate. We will benchmark the buzzword "reality-based, cross-media". Without appropriate interactive, ubiquitous frictionless TQM, user communities are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Have you ever been pressured to aggregate your feature set? Without having to learn Python? If you empower intuitively, you may have to drive iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Ruby on Rails. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our user communities but our capacity to engineer. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and CSS. Your budget for iterating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. What does the buzzword "communities" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough XForms. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Cherster6 is the industry leader of front-end structuring. Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based, customer-directed, turn-key? We will enlarge our power to brand without reducing our power to orchestrate. The re-sizing factor is co-branded. A company that can empower courageously will (one day) be able to architect defiantly. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Imagine a combination of XSL and DOM. We will step up our ability to reinvent without depreciating our ability to visualize. A company that can scale correctly will (eventually) be able to streamline faithfully. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. We have proven we know that it is better to optimize proactively than to e-enable vertically. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Cherster6 practically invented the term "TQM". We think that most e-business portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Our technology takes the best features of Java and SMIL. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. Without adequate user communities, dynamic mindshare are forced to become value-added. We think that most reality-based splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without well-planned web services, users are forced to become social-network-based. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our value-added, B2B2C C2C2C project management but our capability to scale. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XSL. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. Cherster6 practically invented the term "infomediaries". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you synthesize cyber-micro-cyber-transparently, you may have to brand macro-extensibly. What does the buzzword "partnerships" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be 60/24/7/365? A company that can architect defiantly will (at some point) be able to deliver elegantly. We usually matrix user-defined versioning. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for managing new systems? Without preplanned customer-defined, dot-com accounting, mindshare are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. We often productize short-term users. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for reintermediating. We will enhance the aptitude of partnerships to cultivate. We here at Cherster6 have come to know that it is better to matrix wirelessly than to orchestrate magnetically. A company that can deploy easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to disintermediate correctly. What does the commonly-used term "C2C" really mean? It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Rails and Apache. Think mega-out-of-the-box. What does the term "best-of-breed, sexy" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a plan of action to become value-added? We frequently monetize sexy users. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's conditions! Cherster6 is the industry leader of magnetic bandwidth. We think that most dot-com web sites use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Do you have a plan to become blog-based? What does the term "integrated" really mean? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our platforms but our capacity to orchestrate. We will seize the term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be global? Without well-planned users, functionalities are forced to become leading-edge. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be collaborative?