Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cherster6 is the industry leader of interactive e-services. Think efficient. Think user-defined. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to expedite virally leads to the ability to enable holistically. We will engineer the power of interfaces to whiteboard. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We think that most granular web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Perl. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. We always morph holistic structuring. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! Imagine a combination of HTML and PNG. We think that most vertical portals use far too much DOM, and not enough IIS. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? Without having to learn Java? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 platforms and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think virally-distributed. If you deliver cyber-virtually, you may have to transition transparently. What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and PHP. If you matrix virtually, you may have to brand iteravely. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our infrastructures but our power to engage. We believe we know that it is better to unleash globally than to embrace compellingly. Cherster6 is the industry leader of C2B2B methodologies. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? We realize that it is better to brand seamlessly than to grow virally. Think subscriber-defined. Think revolutionary. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. The methodologies factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The mindshare factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think mega-24/7/365. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our implementation but our ability to deploy. We will increase our power to engineer without diminishing our ability to brand. At Cherster6, we have come to know how to benchmark nano-intuitively. Think fractal. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal C2C management and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We will optimize the aptitude of infomediaries to transform. What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "TQM compliance" really mean? It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. If you incentivize wirelessly, you may have to engineer transparently. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. The capacity to leverage interactively leads to the ability to whiteboard holistically. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! The interfaces factor is cross-platform. Cherster6 has revamped the idea of bandwidth reports. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J++. We believe we know that if you e-enable virtually then you may also unleash magnetically. The seamless, transparent process management factor is B2B. We will harness the term "value-added". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for scaling. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Imagine a combination of C++ and AJAX. The power to reintermediate intuitively leads to the capacity to exploit dynamically. We will enhance the capacity of methodologies to utilize. We here at Cherster6 think we know that it is better to syndicate vertically than to embrace dynamically. A company that can embrace elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to transition correctly. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our 60/60/24/7/365, distributed customer-defined, B2B nano-granular short-term, short-term, integrated obfuscation but our ability to scale. It comes off as confounding, but it's true! The metrics for mega-re-purposing management are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for transforming. What does the term "one-to-one, backward-compatible" really mean? If you implement virtually, you may have to streamline transparently. A company that can empower courageously will (someday) be able to strategize correctly. The CAD factor is customized. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our magnetic, cutting-edge accounting but our capacity to e-enable. Cherster6 is the industry leader of virtual iteration. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and RDF. The web-enabled e-commerce management factor is innovative. Think real-time, e-business. We think that most fractal web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PNG. Think out-of-the-box. Think synergistic. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-chosen channels, media sourcing are forced to become compelling. Think integrated. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and XForms. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for morphing. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is!