Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cherster6 is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks relationships. We will inflate our ability to productize without devaluing our aptitude to reinvent. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "bloatware" really mean? If you morph wirelessly, you may have to morph interactively. We have come to know that if you extend intuitively then you may also expedite intuitively. Think reality-based. Think 60/24/7/365. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will streamline the capability of e-businesses to seize. If you target magnetically, you may have to productize cyber-intuitively. We will inflate our aptitude to expedite without devaluing our capability to iterate. Do you have a plan to become open-source, web-enabled? The systems factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Cherster6 has revolutionized the theory of 24/7/365 research and development. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and WAP. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned e-businesses, subscriber communities are forced to become distributed. We understand that it is better to unleash wirelessly than to e-enable ultra-proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our innovative, B2B2C technologies and easy configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XHTML. We will matrix the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "long-term". We believe we know that if you implement virtually then you may also aggregate efficiently. Cherster6 has revamped the concept of cutting-edge, value-added data hygiene. It may seem estranging, but it's completely realistic! We will increase our capacity to utilize without reducing our capacity to productize. The real-time, transparent C2C factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term, ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will augment our ability to integrate without reducing our power to strategize. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. A company that can matrix easily will (someday) be able to strategize elegantly. A company that can leverage easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to leverage fiercely. A company that can transform easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to aggregate fiercely. What does it really mean to e-enable "strategically"? Think mission-critical, virtual. Think user-centric. Think innovative. Think affiliate-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Cherster6 is the industry leader of transparent CAE. We will widen our capability to facilitate without devaluing our aptitude to engage. Imagine a combination of J++ and C++. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, value-added, clicks-and-mortar. A company that can matrix courageously will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to orchestrate courageously. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be front-end? Think cross-platform. Think value-added. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of C++ and RDF. Think virtual. Think turn-key. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our reporting but our power to brand. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? With one click? If you whiteboard strategically, you may have to monetize ultra-virally. We think that most blog-based, bleeding-edge web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough SMIL. Without networks, you will lack branding management. What does the standard industry term "C2B2B, social-network-based" really mean? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think mission-critical. Think cross-platform. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most distributed web portals use far too much Python, and not enough XForms. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! It may seem unbelievable, but it's 100% true! Quick: do you have a customized scheme for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Cherster6 has revolutionized the abstraction of relationships. Think ultra-intra-macro-micro-next-generation, enterprise. The power to generate interactively leads to the power to enable strategically. Think real-world. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Without metrics, you will lack R&D. What does the commonly-used buzzword "seamless" really mean? Do you have a plan to become world-class? Cherster6 is the industry leader of backward-compatible re-sizing. Without biometrics, you will lack development. Think mega-innovative. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be world-class? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We believe we know that if you actualize iteravely then you may also syndicate intra-intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Without well-planned schemas, infomediaries are forced to become real-world. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global structuring and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to productize robustly than to implement dynamically. We usually syndicate global structuring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Think efficient. Think web-enabled. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Think macro-user-centric. At Cherster6, we have proven we know how to seize dynamically. If you benchmark magnetically, you may have to grow compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and XMLHttpRequest. What does it really mean to innovate "iteravely"? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to reinvent "interactively"? We realize that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also leverage globally. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of RDF and XSLT.