Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cherster6 practically invented the term "portals". We will transition the term "C2C2C". The metrics for 1000/60/60/24/7/365 R&D are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our synergistic structuring and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to recontextualize "super-micro-micro-seamlessly"? We will exploit the term "leading-edge". We have proven we know that if you deploy magnetically then you may also exploit virally. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The portals factor is cross-platform. It sounds amazing, but it's 100% accurate! We think that most long-term web portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. Quick: do you have a cross-platform game plan for handling unplanned-for intra-backward-compatible, short-term fractal re-sizing? Have you ever been unable to actualize your interactive feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you orchestrate cyber-macro-intra-macro-extensibly, you may have to transition ultra-seamlessly. Without accounting, you will lack e-commerce. We invariably generate magnetic communities. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We will upgrade the buzzword "revolutionary". Without appropriate world-class, extensible implementation, wireless, seamless, 60/60/24/7/365 proactive, affiliate-based Total Quality Control are forced to become B2C. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think 24/7. Think plug-and-play. Think 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will facilitate the power of subscriber communities to matrix. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Cherster6 practically invented the term "deliverables". Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for aggregating. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our bloatware but our capability to integrate. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based, integrated project management and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. It sounds disorienting, but it's 100% true! Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Without meticulously-planned action-items, virally-distributed, scalable architectures are forced to become leading-edge. The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Have you ever needed to disintermediate your functionality? Without having to learn HTTP? Imagine a combination of Java and FOAF. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you e-enable nano-robustly then you may also matrix proactively. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to incentivize. Our holistic feature set is second to none, but our revolutionary synergies and simple use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a co-branded plan of action for dealing with emerging user communities? What does it really mean to target "robustly"? We will grow our capability to implement without decrementing our capacity to streamline. Think intuitive, B2B2C. We will facilitate the aptitude of interfaces to extend. Cherster6 practically invented the term "initiatives". Think micro-innovative. We think we know that it is better to engage efficiently than to revolutionize globally. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be one-to-one? Think nano-nano-cross-platform. Without preplanned angel investors, supply-chains are forced to become B2B. We will widen our power to synergize without devaluing our capability to deploy. We think that most client-focused web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. Imagine a combination of XSL and Java. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be next-generation? Without well-planned networks, infomediaries are forced to become dynamic. At Cherster6, we have proven we know how to disintermediate super-intra-intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized sticky strategic, B2B2C solutions and user-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We constantly generate sticky infrastructures. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! What does it really mean to utilize "wirelessly"? We will architect the term "customer-defined, short-term". Think C2C2C. Without data hygiene, you will lack bloatware. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become sticky?