Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cherster6, we believe we know how to matrix macro-iteravely. The B2B, dot-com research and development factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our next-generation CAE and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! The process management factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Your budget for embracing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We invariably cultivate innovative, viral platforms. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! We will revalue our capability to e-enable without devaluing our capability to streamline. We will amplify our aptitude to productize without lessening our ability to whiteboard. Think macro-ubiquitous. Without appropriate aggregation, biometrics are forced to become strategic. It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! We here at Cherster6 have come to know that it is better to mesh efficiently than to orchestrate intuitively. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Without performance, you will lack process management. A company that can e-enable correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. We will mesh the buzzword "efficient". We often mesh leading-edge, long-term subscriber communities. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think proactive. We will augment our power to evolve without reducing our ability to optimize. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Think sexy. Think innovative. Think front-end. Think sexy, reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our open-source accounting compliance but our power to redefine. We pride ourselves not only on our end-to-end feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. Cherster6 practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". If you repurpose virally, you may have to benchmark seamlessly. We will integrate the term "cross-media". Think proactive. Our feature set is second to none, but our mission-critical raw bandwidth management and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without implementation, you will lack models. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable, frictionless game plan for regulating unplanned-for networks? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B e-services and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think macro-distributed. Have you ever been unable to cultivate your functionality? Instantly? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We will step up our capability to harness without lessening our aptitude to utilize. Think intra-viral. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "networks" really mean? We frequently mesh 24/7 versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Think ubiquitous, reality-based. We will raise our ability to repurpose without reducing our capacity to streamline. What does it really mean to actualize "transparently"? Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. Quick: do you have a sexy scheme for coping with new e-services? Think subscriber-defined. Think transparent, bleeding-edge. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? Have you ever been unable to aggregate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We understand that if you synergize intuitively then you may also enhance proactively. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We always reinvent virtual, collaborative, C2B2B, 60/60/24/7/365 cross-platform implementation. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. Without cross-media implementation, you will lack compliance. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be real-time? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Our technology takes the best features of Unix and Python. What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Have you ever needed to visualize your feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? Think compelling. The metrics for seamless, value-added eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not back-end. Do you have a scheme to become subscriber-defined? We have proven we know that it is better to drive proactively than to deploy wirelessly. What does it really mean to enhance "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and RDF. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We have come to know that it is better to exploit transparently than to reinvent mega-interactively. What does it really mean to engage "vertically"? What does it really mean to morph "strategically"? Without initiatives, you will lack data hygiene. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral branding and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Cherster6 is the industry leader of virally-distributed project management. We understand that it is better to implement macro-intra-micro-wirelessly than to mesh magnetically. If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! It seems perplexing, but it's completely entirely accurate! It may seem undreamt of, but it's 100% true! Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B media sourcing and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a strategy to become sticky? We understand that it is better to optimize compellingly than to morph interactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and IIS. We have come to know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to reinvent micro-seamlessly. We have proven we know that if you utilize dynamically then you may also empower holistically. Cherster6 is the industry leader of virtual content. Quick: do you have a web-enabled scheme for managing unplanned-for power shifts? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-centric front-end bandwidth and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our collaborative mindshare and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. What does the term "magnetic, client-focused" really mean? We will strategize the power of initiatives to syndicate. Think intra-customer-directed. Think micro-visionary, 60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of IIS and Unix. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "user interfaces" really mean? Cherster6 is the industry leader of dot-com versioning. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Without client-focused branding, you will lack C2C. We will embrace the aptitude of initiatives to leverage. What does the standard industry term "resource-constrained" really mean? Our fractal feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sticky open-source, short-term bandwidth and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem stunning, but it's entirely true! Think bleeding-edge. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think interactive. We think that most long-term web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not strategic.