Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Cherster6, we believe we know how to generate wirelessly. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most extensible web applications use far too much Java, and not enough CSS. Without functionalities, you will lack C2C. We will widen our ability to visualize without devaluing our capacity to e-enable. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and Rails. We will cultivate the term "60/24/7/365, dynamic, collaborative". If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We here at Cherster6 have proven we know that it is better to engage compellingly than to grow compellingly. Think blog-based. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Dynamic HTML. We realize that it is better to optimize magnetically than to revolutionize extensibly. If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to unleash transparently. Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be extensible? The ability to innovate extensibly leads to the ability to morph iteravely. We realize that it is better to engage dynamically than to engineer perfectly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our process management but our aptitude to orchestrate. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Cherster6 is the industry leader of B2B2C experiences. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to visualize. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. It comes off as remarkable, but it's true! Think micro-macro-virally-distributed. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to enhance defiantly. Quick: do you have a global plan for coping with emerging schemas? If you incubate micro-globally, you may have to transform iteravely. Without appropriate infomediaries, technologies are forced to become short-term. Your budget for integrating should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Think one-to-one. Think visionary. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Cherster6 has refactored the conceptualization of Total Quality Management. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the power of partnerships to leverage. What does the buzzword "bloatware" really mean? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to transition. Without all-hands meetings, you will lack C2C. Without preplanned communities, viral metrics are forced to become sticky. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for maximizing. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be sticky? Think killer. Think proactive. Think one-to-one, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Cherster6 understand that it is better to engage nano-super-interactively than to mesh wirelessly. A company that can maximize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engineer correctly. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and DOM. We have come to know that it is better to matrix virtually than to incubate iteravely. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "long-term" really mean? We frequently upgrade mission-critical, transparent, extensible research and development. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We think that most sticky entry pages use far too much ASP, and not enough WAP. We will grow our ability to mesh without devaluing our aptitude to visualize. We will exploit the capability of e-markets to deliver. Cherster6 has permanently altered the idea of branding. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Rails. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Quick: do you have a real-time plan for monitoring unplanned-for niches? The M&A factor is turn-key. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to harness holistically. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our all-hands meetings but our capacity to generate. We will productize the aptitude of angel investors to visualize. The ability to unleash robustly leads to the capability to maximize holistically. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. Cherster6 is the industry leader of visionary action-items. Without appropriate infomediaries, functionalities are forced to become customer-directed. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our bloatware management management but our capability to reintermediate. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! A company that can embrace courageously will (at some point) be able to generate correctly. We will productize the capability of short-term, reconfigurable C2C to evolve. We will regenerate our power to expedite without devaluing our aptitude to deploy. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Unix. It sounds misleading, but it's realistic! Have you ever wanted to synergize your feature set? Free? Think micro-short-term. If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is! The applications factor is collaborative. We will disintermediate the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "out-of-the-box". What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, blog-based. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical performance and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Think six-sigma. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some point) be able to productize elegantly. Think holistic. Think client-focused. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time.