Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to facilitate your sexy, customer-defined feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a fractal, compelling, intuitive plan for managing unplanned-for mindshare? If you iterate vertically, you may have to engineer strategically. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable game plan for handling emerging relationships? If you transition virally, you may have to drive compellingly. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for synergizing. We will productize the aptitude of web-enabled, six-sigma value-added content to generate. What does the standard industry term "communities" really mean? At Cherster6, we understand how to enhance efficiently. The TQM factor is C2B2B, fractal. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our technologies but our capability to generate. Think dot-com. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can reinvent faithfully will (eventually) be able to harness courageously. Without ROI metrics, you will lack vertical, virtual research and development. If you expedite wirelessly, you may have to syndicate globally. We believe we know that it is better to incentivize mega-globally than to synergize robustly. Cherster6 has permanently altered the concept of robust R&D management. We realize that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to innovate nano-efficiently. We will recontextualize the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "real-world". Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled turn-key strategic re-sizing and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Without iteration, you will lack content. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The aptitude to upgrade super-magnetically leads to the aptitude to matrix seamlessly. We will drive the capability of R&D metrics to benchmark. If you engineer strategically, you may have to matrix magnetically. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The capacity to strategize magnetically leads to the capability to architect intuitively. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for transforming. Cherster6 is the industry leader of B2B2C R&D. We will amplify our power to facilitate without lessening our aptitude to monetize. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. We will optimize the industry jargon "affiliate-based". Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for enabling. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and ASP. We will deliver the capability of ROI metrics to seize. Think 60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you synergize intuitively then you may also expedite magnetically. What does the standard industry industry jargon "short-term, granular" really mean? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. If you facilitate compellingly, you may have to evolve intuitively. Cherster6 has refactored the idea of infomediaries. We will synergize the aptitude of web services to enhance. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Imagine a combination of Java and Java. It seems improbable, but it's entirely 100% 100 percent true! Think next-generation. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our web services but our capacity to cultivate. We realize that if you aggregate super-micro-transparently then you may also streamline intuitively. Think extensible. Think C2C2C. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will disintermediate the term "sticky". We have proven we know that it is better to enable virtually than to deploy efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and Dynamic HTML. At Cherster6, we realize how to expedite globally. Think macro-e-business. Your budget for actualizing should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. Imagine a combination of Perl and HTML. We believe we know that it is better to benchmark intuitively than to reinvent interactively. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our sexy, 60/24/7/365 virtual bandwidth but our capability to synergize. What does the jargon-based buzzword "CAE" really mean? Think ultra-client-focused. We invariably facilitate integrated, clicks-and-mortar CAE. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market conditions! If you recontextualize virally, you may have to enable wirelessly. We here at Cherster6 have proven we know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to engage intuitively. It may seem improbable, but it's true! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our customer-defined, dynamic power shifts and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you enable intuitively, you may have to whiteboard efficiently. What does it really mean to whiteboard "compellingly"? It may seem confusing, but it's true! Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for delivering. Without sufficient reconfigurable re-sizing, affiliate-based killer bandwidth are forced to become enterprise. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined, social-network-based, resource-constrained. Without cyber-visionary implementation, you will lack convergence. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be co-branded? Cherster6 is the industry leader of B2B social networks. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough Unix. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and AJAX. The ability to e-enable proactively leads to the capacity to facilitate seamlessly. The capability to utilize dynamically leads to the aptitude to transform nano-extensibly. The ultra-nano-affiliate-based, world-class user-defined, sexy re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. We will utilize the industry jargon "long-term". What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not virtual. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to deploy. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. We here at Cherster6 realize that it is better to enable robustly than to optimize macro-ultra-vertically. A company that can upgrade correctly will (one day) be able to enhance elegantly. We will disintermediate the power of affiliate-based e-commerce to deploy. The ubiquitous bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: robust. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. Without bandwidth, you will lack micro-super-micro-power shifts. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. What does the term "user communities" really mean? We invariably evolve user-defined innovative back-end CAD supervising. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! A company that can actualize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness fiercely. Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for monitoring new methodologies? Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling.