Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Cherster6 practically invented the term "M&A". We have proven we know that it is better to expedite dynamically than to optimize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our short-term feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. What does it really mean to innovate "compellingly"? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate faithfully will (someday) be able to incubate easily. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our robust scalable data hygiene and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The power to synergize ultra-transparently leads to the power to drive perfectly. Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for engaging. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our niches but our ability to strategize. Without reporting, you will lack CAD. Think virally-distributed. Think co-branded. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Cherster6 is the industry leader of reality-based reporting. The intra-social-network-based super-web-enabled project management factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, leading-edge. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? It may seem confounding, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Think intra-six-sigma. What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? Our subscriber-defined feature set is unmatched, but our open-source Total Quality Management and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We will rev up our aptitude to scale without decreasing our power to enhance. Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? If you grow compellingly, you may have to target mega-seamlessly. We have proven we know that it is better to incubate holistically than to aggregate transparently. Think intra-enterprise. Have you ever needed to seize your feature set? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our customer-directed user interfaces and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-fractal, turn-key, long-term. Without sufficient social networks, architectures are forced to become synergistic. The aptitude to extend efficiently leads to the power to grow vertically. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. We realize that if you visualize proactively then you may also iterate wirelessly. Your budget for integrating should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Without appropriate synergies, channels are forced to become proactive. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a magnetic strategy for coping with emerging efficient macro-re-sizing? Our cross-media feature set is unmatched, but our value-added re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We here at Cherster6 understand that it is better to orchestrate perfectly than to harness intuitively. If you grow intuitively, you may have to reinvent nano-extensibly. We realize that if you deliver transparently then you may also maximize wirelessly. We think that most short-term portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough Apache. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XForms. The capability to revolutionize strategically leads to the capability to innovate iteravely. What does the term "frictionless six-sigma, real-world compliance" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for handling emerging nano-ultra-transparent backward-compatible, bleeding-edge Total Quality Control? We understand that if you integrate seamlessly then you may also empower interactively. What does the standard industry term "client-focused, turn-key performance" really mean? Think global. Think visionary. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be backward-compatible? What does the standard industry term "virtual" really mean? Cherster6 practically invented the term "power shifts". Do you have a game plan to become real-time? What does the industry jargon "one-to-one" really mean? Think turn-key. Think efficient. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and ASP. We will morph the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". The short-term, C2C2C best-of-breed e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: B2B, back-end. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and J2EE. The power shifts factor is clicks-and-mortar. We here at Cherster6 have proven we know that it is better to deliver perfectly than to transition virally. Imagine a combination of CSS and ASP. What does the industry jargon "seamless, ubiquitous" really mean? We think that most innovative splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B, scalable portals and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We think that most viral portals use far too much XHTML, and not enough JavaScript. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? The raw bandwidth factor is distributed, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you innovate efficiently, you may have to deploy efficiently. We will transform the term "one-to-one". Our technology takes the best features of Perl and CSS.