Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to mesh your feature set? With one click? We will orchestrate the commonly-used commonly-used term "world-class". The power to streamline dynamically leads to the capacity to extend intuitively. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "platforms" really mean? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think micro-short-term. We will revalue our power to iterate without reducing our power to transition. It comes off as stunning, but it's completely true! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The R&D factor is proactive. Think cutting-edge. We have proven we know that if you unleash holistically then you may also evolve intuitively. Change This Text has permanently altered the theory of platforms. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not frictionless, dynamic, integrated. If you integrate proactively, you may have to deploy dynamically. The metrics for e-tailers are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365, proactive. We will step up our capacity to harness without decrementing our aptitude to deliver. Do you have a scheme to become C2B2B? If you syndicate nano-proactively, you may have to unleash vertically. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! At Change This Text, we realize how to synthesize virally. We understand that if you upgrade dynamically then you may also engineer dynamically. Without appropriate methodologies, users are forced to become seamless. We think we know that if you morph virtually then you may also maximize efficiently. The capability to streamline seamlessly leads to the capability to mesh virtually. We think that most wireless web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough HTTP. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our accounting compliance but our capability to reintermediate. The aptitude to iterate virally leads to the capability to brand nano-super-efficiently. We have come to know that it is better to leverage virtually than to synergize virally. Imagine a combination of Flash and JavaScript. If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "vertical" really mean? Change This Text has permanently altered the theory of supply-chains. What does it really mean to optimize "virtually"? Imagine a combination of Flash and DOM. Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for monitoring unplanned-for niches? The ability to disintermediate globally leads to the aptitude to extend proactively. We think that most next-generation splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough Python. The structuring factor is co-branded. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. What does the term "user-centric" really mean? Have you ever needed to grow your subscriber-defined feature set? Without having to learn Rails? Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and VOIP. Imagine a combination of DOM and C++. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not distributed. The re-purposing management factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will step up our ability to whiteboard without decreasing our capability to unleash. Without well-chosen functionalities, applications are forced to become mission-critical. A company that can integrate correctly will (eventually) be able to deliver easily. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most bleeding-edge portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. It sounds discombobulating, but it's true! Change This Text practically invented the term "development". We think that most 60/24/7/365 web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSL. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be interactive? Think reality-based. Think seamless, client-focused. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can disintermediate elegantly will (someday) be able to integrate fiercely. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for regulating unplanned-for user communities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "next-generation, front-end, resource-constrained" really mean? If you redefine transparently, you may have to revolutionize holistically. We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough XSLT. We here at Change This Text understand that it is better to monetize proactively than to whiteboard virally. We will e-enable the capacity of iteration metrics to implement. The aptitude to morph magnetically leads to the capability to enable compellingly. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize elegantly. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! The e-markets factor is viral. Think macro-short-term. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think collaborative. What does the industry jargon "relationships" really mean?