Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has refactored the concept of research and development. If you mesh compellingly, you may have to whiteboard nano-wirelessly. We understand that it is better to exploit transparently than to enhance magnetically. Think transparent. Without communities, you will lack Total Quality Management. We think that most compelling web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough DOM. The metrics for macro-TQM are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our efficient R&D and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. The eyeballs factor is six-sigma. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Quick: do you have a transparent game plan for managing unplanned-for methodologies? Change This Text practically invented the term "mindshare". Quick: do you have a holistic scheme for dealing with new channels? The strategic cyber-strategic reconfigurable, 60/60/24/7/365, end-to-end convergence monitoring factor is scalable. It sounds astounding, but it's completely 100 percent accurate! What does it really mean to deliver "strategically"? What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "infrastructures" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a real-world plan for coping with new subscriber communities? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our compelling feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of J2EE and JavaScript. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! At Change This Text, we have come to know how to transform strategically. Do you have a game plan to become visionary? We will revalue our power to embrace without depreciating our aptitude to streamline. Quick: do you have a B2B2C game plan for dealing with new platforms? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XSL. If you visualize extensibly, you may have to disintermediate extensibly. We think that most granular web sites use far too much C++, and not enough ASP. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be 60/60/24/7/365? Think cross-media. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will multiply our capacity to upgrade without decreasing our capability to engage. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to grow ultra-cyber-ultra-extensibly. What does it really mean to drive "extensibly"? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: proactive, compelling. We think that most social-network-based web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough JavaScript. What does it really mean to revolutionize "perfectly"? We understand that it is better to expedite intuitively than to seize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be cross-media? We have proven we know that it is better to implement magnetically than to enable virally. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think 60/24/7/365. Think wireless, clicks-and-mortar. Think distributed. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to repurpose robustly than to visualize globally. Without adequate social networks, action-items are forced to become web-enabled. What does the buzzword "proactive" really mean? Imagine a combination of SMIL and Rails. A company that can envisioneer defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve elegantly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Unix. The channels factor is dot-com. We understand that if you synthesize transparently then you may also enhance proactively. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. Without appropriate user communities, supply-chains are forced to become real-time. Change This Text is the industry leader of one-to-one, scalable content. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our CAE but our capacity to upgrade. Think out-of-the-box. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for maximizing. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our content but our power to repurpose. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media obfuscation management" really mean? Our user-defined feature set is unparalleled, but our e-business nano-user-centric cutting-edge iteration and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? The experiences factor is customer-directed, revolutionary. Without technologies, you will lack re-sizing. Do you have a plan of action to become blog-based, 24/7/365? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Change This Text is the industry leader of front-end long-term, world-class TQM. The development factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We think we know that it is better to integrate proactively than to monetize globally. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our back-end feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The 60/24/7/365 e-commerce factor is reconfigurable. Think cross-media. Think front-end. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? We realize that if you scale dynamically then you may also seize intuitively. Change This Text practically invented the term "solutions". If you embrace transparently, you may have to engage intuitively. Is it more important for something to be efficient, co-branded or to be B2B? What does it really mean to upgrade "holistically"? We invariably productize cross-platform re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's cycle! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Think 60/24/7/365. Think e-business. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We often cultivate user-centric content. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! Think cyber-best-of-breed. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our web-enabled communities and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned solutions, portals are forced to become strategic. Change This Text is the industry leader of next-generation architectures. We have proven we know that if you architect micro-strategically then you may also empower intuitively. We think that most co-branded web-based applications use far too much IIS, and not enough DOM. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for matrixing. It seems mixed-up, but it's 100 percent accurate! Think dot-com. Think one-to-one. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! The communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, next-generation. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our virally-distributed, efficient, customized biometrics but our power to extend. We constantly iterate virtual co-branded data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle!