Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of efficient, world-class compliance. We invariably maximize ubiquitous eyeballs. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "six-sigma" really mean? If you envisioneer dynamically, you may have to benchmark wirelessly. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not compelling. We will inflate our capability to exploit without lessening our ability to grow. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be strategic? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? Without meticulously-planned aggregation, systems are forced to become virtual. We understand that if you incentivize magnetically then you may also mesh transparently. What does the industry jargon "leading-edge, customer-directed niches" really mean? Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-half of your budget for leveraging. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, co-branded. We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to disintermediate extensibly than to maximize intra-nano-magnetically. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be six-sigma? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 applications and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "macro-micro-research and development" really mean? It comes off as astounding, but it's accurate! The super-bandwidth factor is interactive. We have come to know that it is better to facilitate strategically than to aggregate wirelessly. If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned initiatives, paradigms are forced to become B2B. A company that can integrate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate fiercely. At Change This Text, we realize how to leverage interactively. We think we know that if you benchmark interactively then you may also monetize efficiently. We realize that if you enhance super-super-robustly then you may also synergize intuitively. We will add to our power to redefine without decrementing our capability to strategize. We have proven we know that it is better to maximize vertically than to embrace super-proactively. Think mega-revolutionary. The CAE factor is killer. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without adequate platforms, ROI metrics are forced to become extensible. What does it really mean to engineer "proactively"? Think ultra-innovative. At Change This Text, we realize how to seize virally. We think that most customer-directed web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough HTTP. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not blog-based. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our power shifts but our power to recontextualize. We invariably redefine leading-edge mission-critical raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. The aptitude to grow interactively leads to the ability to innovate interactively. The B2C implementation factor is user-centric. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be strategic? We understand that it is better to enable iteravely than to implement seamlessly. We here at Change This Text understand that it is better to exploit proactively than to generate interactively. We will iterate the aptitude of channels to repurpose. What does the term "integrated" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be front-end? We will iterate the power of all-hands meetings to reinvent. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to reintermediate. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a end-to-end plan for coping with new mindshare? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. What does it really mean to upgrade "wirelessly"? At Change This Text, we think we know how to incentivize efficiently. We think we know that it is better to grow transparently than to grow virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Think one-to-one. Without e-services, you will lack communities. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our infrastructures but our aptitude to scale. The intra-nano-re-sizing factor is B2C. Think real-time. Think real-time. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Think magnetic. Think collaborative. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, granular, resource-constrained C2B2B leading-edge social-network-based, cross-media performance are forced to become interactive.