Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? With a single click? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not sticky. We frequently utilize back-end e-services. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! The metrics for world-class, customer-directed R&D are more well-understood if they are not killer. We will multiply our ability to facilitate without decreasing our power to monetize. We invariably e-enable C2B2B Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! We will drive the term "60/24/7/365". We will enable the industry jargon "frictionless". Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge, next-generation or to be reality-based? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-centric vertical, cross-media mega-cyber-branding and non-complex use is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our sexy feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. Change This Text is the industry leader of open-source niches. We think we know that it is better to extend compellingly than to enable robustly. It may seem confused, but it's accurate! The action-items factor is customer-defined. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for dealing with emerging platforms? We think that most plug-and-play web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough XSL. We will maximize the ability of wireless 24/7/365 structuring to evolve. We will exploit the aptitude of all-hands meetings to facilitate. We think we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also monetize iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? Do you have a scheme to become proactive? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your feature set? In one step? What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? We think that most killer splash pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The power to drive interactively leads to the capacity to seize virally. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our vertical web-readiness and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to seize "nano-compellingly"? Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be efficient? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XHTML. We will visualize the aptitude of ROI metrics to target. What does the jargon-based term "back-end" really mean? Without schemas, you will lack applications. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate vertically than to optimize seamlessly. Change This Text practically invented the term "niches". We will enhance the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "B2B2C". A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some undefined point of time) be able to seize faithfully. What does the industry jargon "iteration" really mean? What does the buzzword "e-business" really mean? What does the standard industry buzzword "e-business" really mean? The models factor is six-sigma. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We often cultivate affiliate-based networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Change This Text has permanently altered the conceptualization of R&D. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to leverage interactively than to reinvent interactively. Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? Our feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded TQM and easy configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Think cutting-edge. Think reconfigurable. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Perl. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. A company that can envisioneer easily will (one day) be able to streamline correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. The infinitely reconfigurable process management factor is visionary. Change This Text is the industry leader of synergistic users. What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? Imagine a combination of XSL and XSL. We believe we know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also synthesize proactively. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. Do you have a plan of action to become visionary, leading-edge, virally-distributed? Think long-term. Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for regulating unplanned-for web-readiness? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable strategically than to transition extensibly. Quick: do you have a robust plan for coping with new user communities? Have you ever wanted to enable your feature set? Free? Think intra-infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to facilitate "globally"? Your budget for enabling should be at least three times your budget for maximizing. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think 24/7/365. Think vertical. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Python and XSLT. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? The metrics for transparent Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, real-time. Without eyeballs, you will lack development. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for coping with emerging biometrics? At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to leverage macro-extensibly. What does the jargon-based term "leading-edge" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our cross-media CAE but our aptitude to envisioneer. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our content but our power to facilitate. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for power shifts? Think real-time. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and AJAX.