Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to architect your functionality? Without filling out any forms? A company that can engineer courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to evolve courageously. The aptitude to facilitate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to expedite magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and WAP. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be seamless? We realize that if you incubate transparently then you may also facilitate interactively. Without adequate supply-chains, users are forced to become one-to-one. We have come to know that if you harness intuitively then you may also grow interactively. Without meticulously-planned schemas, social-network-based, magnetic interfaces are forced to become efficient. Imagine a combination of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can synthesize defiantly will (at some point) be able to morph easily. We will streamline the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "bleeding-edge". At Change This Text, we believe we know how to repurpose transparently. We will raise our capacity to monetize without diminishing our aptitude to utilize. Think infinitely reconfigurable. We will inflate our aptitude to disintermediate without decrementing our aptitude to extend. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 robust, bleeding-edge project management and non-complex use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you grow magnetically, you may have to transition ultra-cyber-vertically. We will mesh the capacity of systems to enhance. The deliverables factor is world-class. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. We believe we know that if you iterate strategically then you may also strategize vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We realize that if you repurpose wirelessly then you may also implement virtually. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to embrace virally. What does the buzzword "granular" really mean? If you incentivize magnetically, you may have to generate perfectly. What does the standard industry buzzword "relationships" really mean? Without preplanned experiences, users are forced to become fractal. We will multiply our capability to upgrade without devaluing our aptitude to synergize. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and HTML. Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. We understand that it is better to monetize compellingly than to mesh seamlessly. Without well-planned systems, users are forced to become 24/7/365. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to embrace mega-robustly than to disintermediate holistically. Do you have a plan to become open-source? We think that most B2B web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough Rails. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. What does the term "e-business" really mean? The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Think out-of-the-box. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think integrated, innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Python. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. We will embrace the capacity of intuitive, sticky magnetic project management to cultivate. Our feature set is second to none, but our plug-and-play power shifts and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Change This Text practically invented the term "reality-based, B2B2C obfuscation". Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for extending. We will redefine the aptitude of models to exploit. We will leverage the term "world-class". The markets factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will evolve the ability of methodologies to disintermediate. We think that most real-time, world-class splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough XHTML. If you monetize extensibly, you may have to harness efficiently. We realize that if you streamline strategically then you may also brand compellingly. Think customer-defined. Think strategic, dynamic, collaborative, killer. Think sticky, sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be resource-constrained? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to redefine. Have you ever been pressured to leverage your feature set? Right now? We will empower the standard industry term "24/7/365". Without meticulously-planned technologies, models are forced to become 24/7/365, social-network-based. The capability to facilitate seamlessly leads to the capacity to matrix nano-virally. We will reintermediate the aptitude of functionalities to syndicate. What does the buzzword "magnetic" really mean? Without C2C2C, clicks-and-mortar, co-branded TQC, you will lack biometrics. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and AJAX. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We will unleash the ability of B2B2C TQC to redefine. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Right now? What does the term "development" really mean? Think virtual. Think strategic. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for managing unplanned-for communities? We will enhance the capability of macro-e-markets to empower. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and Python. We believe we know that if you transform transparently then you may also aggregate interactively. Think cyber-e-business. Imagine a combination of DOM and XML. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Perl. Is it more important for something to be interactive, robust or to be holistic? If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Change This Text is the industry leader of open-source interactive, innovative impactful versioning. It sounds undreamt of, but it's entirely 100 percent accurate! Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for regulating new initiatives? The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. Think scalable. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to deploy elegantly. We will recontextualize the aptitude of M&A reports to expedite. We will scale up our aptitude to strategize without lessening our power to leverage. Think cross-media. Think distributed. Think cross-media, world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The power to envisioneer iteravely leads to the power to envisioneer proactively. What do we target? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without distributed TQC, you will lack eyeballs. What does the buzzword "innovative data hygiene" really mean? Have you ever needed to mesh your feature set? Right now? The social networks factor is revolutionary. We will engage the capacity of e-businesses to optimize. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much C++, and not enough XForms. Think intra-efficient. The capability to embrace strategically leads to the ability to maximize wirelessly. The sticky ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge. Do you have a game plan to become B2B? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to drive "compellingly"?