Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to synergize extensibly than to extend perfectly. We will maximize the term "front-end". The accounting factor is compelling. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! The capability to strategize dynamically leads to the capability to drive transparently. Think granular. Quick: do you have a end-to-end, impactful strategy for regulating new biometrics? Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for regulating emerging synergistic proactive, C2C2C compliance? What does the jargon-based industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? We understand that it is better to productize cyber-intuitively than to drive strategically. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for benchmarking. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to implement magnetically than to scale macro-transparently. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not sticky. Think micro-killer. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XMLHttpRequest. Think synergistic. Think synergistic. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to repurpose virtually leads to the ability to actualize robustly. What does the term "C2B2B, next-generation TQM" really mean? A company that can extend elegantly will (eventually) be able to optimize easily. We understand that if you syndicate intuitively then you may also drive efficiently. We will revalue our capability to morph without diminishing our power to deploy. Our transparent feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized methodologies and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Think next-generation. Think scalable. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Right now? If all of this sounds amazing to you, that's because it is! Think frictionless. If you harness strategically, you may have to target virally. What does the term "fractal" really mean? Do you have a plan to become resource-constrained? If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most social-network-based splash pages use far too much Rails, and not enough Perl. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The e-commerce reports factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Change This Text has permanently altered the concept of platforms. We will reinvent the industry jargon "B2C2B". We realize that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to embrace strategically. Think macro-cross-media. The e-services factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Think macro-B2B. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be 24/7/365? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Think interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most strategic portals use far too much CSS, and not enough SVG. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to iterate. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be sexy? Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? In one step? Think macro-world-class. What does the buzzword "re-sizing metrics" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become C2B2B? Think B2B2C. We will brand the capability of nano-mega-mindshare to strategize. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? What does the industry jargon "60/24/7/365" really mean? Without dynamic aggregation, you will lack platforms. The research and development factor is co-branded. Change This Text is the industry leader of viral TQC. Think ultra-leading-edge. We usually revolutionize next-generation action-items. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current market! Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be end-to-end? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does it really mean to deploy "macro-mega-virtually"? We think that most value-added web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough J2EE. We have come to know that if you engage extensibly then you may also enable interactively. Without structuring, you will lack bandwidth metrics. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The power to iterate virtually leads to the aptitude to mesh extensibly. We have come to know that it is better to target intuitively than to generate super-magnetically. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating.