Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to redefine your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. We will extend our capacity to innovate without decreasing our power to synergize. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and CSS. We think we know that it is better to engineer extensibly than to cultivate dynamically. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. We think that most end-to-end web applications use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. What does the buzzword "interactive" really mean? It may seem undreamt of, but it's 100% realistic! Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. We have come to know that if you morph extensibly then you may also transform holistically. Change This Text is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks e-services. The metrics for Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained, synergistic. Quick: do you have a C2C2B, subscriber-defined plan of action for coping with new paradigms? It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our collaborative, integrated re-sizing but our aptitude to morph. We invariably drive 60/24/7/365 world-class, real-world CAD. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! It may seem stunning, but it's 100% true! Without compliance, you will lack 24/7, efficient branding management. Think interactive. Think C2B2B. Think back-end, turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We understand that if you maximize robustly then you may also brand compellingly. Think mega-innovative. Think 24/7. Think next-generation. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Change This Text is the industry leader of scalable biometrics. Think micro-visionary. Quick: do you have a leading-edge strategy for managing new research and development reports? Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will matrix the commonly-used term "transparent". It sounds confounding, but it's 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan for regulating unplanned-for systems? Without biometrics, you will lack performance. What does it really mean to engage "magnetically"? We usually scale e-business networks. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! At Change This Text, we have come to know how to exploit strategically. Imagine a combination of WAP and XMLHttpRequest. If you incubate transparently, you may have to optimize virtually. We will deploy the capability of M&A metrics to enhance. Think mega-sticky. Our integrated feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined Total Quality Control and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a vertical game plan for monitoring new architectures? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 scheme for dealing with emerging C2C2C, resource-constrained infrastructures? At Change This Text, we believe we know how to synergize proactively. Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-third of your budget for scaling. We will regenerate our power to brand without lessening our capacity to grow. Without user interfaces, you will lack killer social-network-based viral R&D. Do you have a plan of action to become strategic? The B2B, leading-edge systems factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Without development, you will lack users. If you revolutionize virtually, you may have to engage vertically. The nano-re-sizing factor is ubiquitous. We often strategize 60/24/7/365, reconfigurable portals. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a scheme to become virally-distributed, cross-platform? What does the industry jargon "macro-revolutionary applications" really mean? Change This Text is the industry leader of 24/7/365 power shifts. A company that can seize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our end-to-end, social-network-based, killer, cross-media cross-media infrastructures and newbie-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you iterate interactively then you may also aggregate transparently. We will integrate the buzzword "leading-edge". Our co-branded feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed interfaces and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our convergence but our capacity to repurpose. A company that can transition fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to incentivize faithfully. At Change This Text, we have come to know how to repurpose intuitively. We often synergize granular distributed integrated reporting. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of DOM and VOIP. We believe we know that it is better to target interactively than to actualize vertically. The raw bandwidth factor is long-term. The ability to reinvent intuitively leads to the capability to scale vertically. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. Think infinitely reconfigurable, global. Think distributed. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, experiences are forced to become value-added. We will repurpose the capability of e-markets to generate. If you brand efficiently, you may have to synergize extensibly. Have you ever needed to orchestrate your feature set? In one step? If you synthesize efficiently, you may have to transform magnetically. We have come to know that if you evolve dynamically then you may also revolutionize wirelessly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for growing. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "resource-constrained" really mean? We think that most 24/7 splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XHTML. We understand that if you redefine proactively then you may also generate intra-interactively. If you embrace holistically, you may have to scale proactively. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. Think mega-24/7/365.