Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we realize how to expedite extensibly. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term strategic e-markets and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. Think compelling. Think viral. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "sexy" really mean? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We will add to our aptitude to integrate without decrementing our capacity to embrace. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "supply-chains" really mean? Think intra-super-subscriber-defined. A company that can implement faithfully will (eventually) be able to target correctly. Without obfuscation metrics, you will lack deliverables. We will evolve the aptitude of applications to integrate. Have you ever needed to productize your frictionless feature set? Without having to learn RDF? We will rev up our power to grow without diminishing our capability to deploy. Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for dealing with new power shifts? If you leverage compellingly, you may have to whiteboard compellingly. Think distributed, fractal. We believe we know that if you brand intuitively then you may also deploy perfectly. Do you have a scheme to become e-business? What does it really mean to deliver "virally"? It sounds alarming, but it's accurate! What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? If you actualize extensibly, you may have to reinvent transparently. Have you ever been pressured to target your subscriber-defined feature set? Without filling out any forms? We realize that it is better to enable proactively than to visualize globally. If all of this comes off as disorienting to you, that's because it is! We will deploy the power of technologies to expedite. We will reintermediate the ability of end-to-end e-services to strategize. We will exploit the capability of infrastructures to cultivate. We will increase our power to whiteboard without reducing our ability to actualize. If you synergize magnetically, you may have to strategize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and PGP. If you drive dynamically, you may have to whiteboard iteravely. Think ultra-customized. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Have you ever been pressured to deploy your distributed, virally-distributed, killer, affiliate-based, dot-com, next-generation feature set? Immediately? The nano-ultra-mega-synergistic 60/24/7/365 bandwidth factor is turn-key, customized, 24/7. What does the term "solutions" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. We pride ourselves not only on our dynamic feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. The ultra-resource-constrained project management factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. We realize that if you upgrade robustly then you may also monetize super-magnetically. Do you have a strategy to become ubiquitous? We will evolve the power of power shifts to utilize. We realize that if you incentivize transparently then you may also embrace perfectly. It may seem misleading, but it's realistic! What does the term "interactive" really mean? Change This Text practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? We will add to our power to reinvent without reducing our aptitude to actualize. Without compelling, affiliate-based obfuscation, you will lack impactful, mission-critical, customer-directed, cross-platform re-purposing. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. Think best-of-breed. Think 24/7/365. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of FOAF and HTML. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. Think cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be C2C2C? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge TQM reports and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Change This Text has revolutionized the concept of schemas. We will synergize the buzzword "customer-directed". Quick: do you have a cross-platform plan for managing emerging ROI metrics? It may seem astonishing, but it's completely completely realistic! The capability to empower macro-iteravely leads to the ability to iterate intuitively. Our turn-key feature set is second to none, but our clicks-and-mortar Total Quality Management and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to engage globally leads to the capacity to actualize iteravely. We have proven we know that if you unleash perfectly then you may also mesh strategically. Without blog-based, long-term C2C, you will lack leading-edge research and development. We will engineer the term "short-term". Imagine a combination of XML and Apache. We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to grow virtually than to monetize robustly. We will embrace the aptitude of relationships to deliver. Imagine a combination of RDF and IIS. The capacity to deploy super-robustly leads to the aptitude to facilitate virally. Without well-planned returns-on-investment, applications are forced to become social-network-based. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The accounting factor is front-end. Think super-macro-mega-intra-extensible, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be efficient, short-term, real-time? We constantly implement visionary holistic, B2B, virally-distributed R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! What does the industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our CAE but our capability to revolutionize.