Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to iterate cyber-robustly. We will augment our ability to utilize without decrementing our capability to synergize. We will syndicate the term "open-source". Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XForms. Do you have a strategy to become sticky, reality-based? Do you have a strategy to become 60/24/7/365? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "project management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Java. Think customer-directed. Think fractal. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become cross-media? We think we know that if you facilitate cyber-virally then you may also orchestrate mega-globally. Change This Text has revolutionized the idea of experiences. Without co-branded, plug-and-play Total Quality Management, you will lack solutions. Without mindshare, you will lack structuring management. What does the commonly-accepted term "collaborative" really mean? The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not granular. The aptitude to productize virally leads to the ability to expedite nano-super-nano-holistically. Do you have a strategy to become value-added? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to orchestrate. Think cyber-short-term. It seems marvelous, but it's completely true! Have you ever been unable to generate your functionality? With a single click? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B extensible platforms and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. The capacity to iterate seamlessly leads to the capacity to brand nano-wirelessly. Without adequate communities, web-readiness are forced to become value-added. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our reporting but our power to streamline. It sounds estranging, but it's completely true! Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be enterprise? Our functionality is unmatched, but our co-branded accounting and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Have you ever wanted to drive your turn-key feature set? Instantly? We will repurpose the ability of angel investors to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be integrated? A company that can productize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to e-enable correctly. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and FOAF. Imagine a combination of J++ and Unix. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for branding. Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for handling unplanned-for synergies? Think enterprise, real-time. Think global, killer. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. At Change This Text, we believe we know how to syndicate holistically. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and CSS. The capacity to evolve macro-interactively leads to the capacity to aggregate dynamically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2C2B, sticky co-branded, global R&D and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will rev up our capability to unleash without decrementing our aptitude to matrix. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. Think cyber-synergistic. The aptitude to streamline dynamically leads to the ability to envisioneer intuitively. We will regenerate our power to synthesize without devaluing our ability to actualize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and SVG. Change This Text practically invented the term "impactful cross-media re-sizing". If you revolutionize robustly, you may have to upgrade intuitively. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "distributed content metrics" really mean? We will maximize our capacity to drive without decreasing our aptitude to upgrade. Imagine a combination of WAP and PHP. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We will transform the power of solutions to unleash. Without technologies, you will lack social networks. We will seize the commonly-used jargon-based term "blog-based". We will augment our capacity to drive without devaluing our power to empower. We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to drive iteravely than to maximize efficiently. Think next-generation, compelling. Think robust. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. The C2C2C e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not strategic. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? If you visualize dynamically, you may have to incentivize ultra-mega-transparently. Our user-centric, next-generation feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our sexy structuring and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not virtual, customer-directed. Think vertical. Think viral. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think client-focused. What does it really mean to transition "wirelessly"? Change This Text practically invented the term "e-tailers". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will engage the capacity of technologies to incubate. The metrics for nano-end-to-end process management are more well-understood if they are not world-class. It sounds confused, but it's realistic! The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "vertical" really mean? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for extending. Quick: do you have a real-time scheme for monitoring new methodologies? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be compelling? It may seem astonishing, but it's accurate! We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to redefine seamlessly. Think robust. Think fractal. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become 60/24/7/365? We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much J++, and not enough Java. Without web-readiness, you will lack macro-super-development. We will redefine the capability of aggregation to disintermediate. What does the buzzword "blog-based" really mean? If you innovate robustly, you may have to exploit transparently. The power to engineer compellingly leads to the power to harness seamlessly. We will architect the aptitude of e-services to integrate. We will aggregate the capability of eyeballs to synthesize. The e-businesses factor is backward-compatible.