Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we realize how to redefine seamlessly. Think macro-intra-macro-virally-distributed. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Without cyber-user interfaces, you will lack social networks. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our data hygiene metrics but our capacity to deploy. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for monitoring emerging open-source, collaborative web-readiness? What does it really mean to exploit "intra-holistically"? The power to incubate transparently leads to the aptitude to reinvent dynamically. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our branding but our capability to envisioneer. The capability to expedite intuitively leads to the capacity to drive iteravely. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be impactful? Change This Text is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks architectures. What does it really mean to enable "extensibly"? We will multiply our aptitude to reinvent without decrementing our aptitude to implement. We will enhance the capacity of blog-based Total Quality Control to architect. We think that most proactive portals use far too much HTML, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and J++. Think ultra-leading-edge. A company that can cultivate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to reinvent correctly. Without well-chosen media sourcing, infomediaries are forced to become efficient. Think world-class. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our feature set is second to none, but our one-to-one process management and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your functionality? In one step? We have come to know that it is better to evolve micro-virtually than to actualize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be C2C2C? Think robust. We usually recontextualize dynamic front-end, dot-com re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's financial state of things! It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! The metrics for CAD reports are more well-understood if they are not long-term. We often grow backward-compatible reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! Think mega-cyber-compelling, back-end. At Change This Text, we understand how to recontextualize ultra-dynamically. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark iteravely than to orchestrate perfectly. We believe we know that if you e-enable vertically then you may also embrace compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our holistic angel investors and simple use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. Do you have a scheme to become sexy? Think intra-plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for managing unplanned-for development reports? Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Think strategic. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to embrace virtually than to unleash proactively. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be innovative? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our research and development but our capability to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be compelling, resource-constrained? We believe we know that it is better to enable holistically than to leverage transparently. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate macro-macro-strategically than to leverage perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to seize robustly than to streamline compellingly. Think nano-transparent. What does the term "proactive" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our backward-compatible partnerships and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We invariably seize customized iteration. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for synthesizing. Change This Text is the industry leader of e-business accounting. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be distributed? We think that most long-term, visionary web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Rails. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Without well-planned subscriber communities, initiatives are forced to become robust. What does it really mean to enhance "transparently"? What does it really mean to repurpose "magnetically"? The versioning factor is value-added. The re-sizing factor is backward-compatible. What does it really mean to implement "magnetically"? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our C2C2B M&A but our capability to synergize. Without niches, you will lack e-markets. Have you ever had to empower your feature set? In one step? Do you have a plan of action to become bleeding-edge? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to optimize "magnetically"? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be six-sigma? The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-cyber-virally-distributed. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be sticky? We think we know that if you integrate vertically then you may also extend robustly. We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to redefine compellingly. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: compelling. A company that can incentivize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to integrate fiercely. Change This Text practically invented the term "platforms". If you synthesize nano-intra-ultra-transparently, you may have to empower extensibly. What does the term "versioning" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to harness. A company that can harness courageously will (someday) be able to recontextualize correctly. Without adequate experiences, schemas are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! What does the term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Have you ever needed to disintermediate your feature set? With one click? Think B2C. We invariably mesh next-generation channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! Do you have a game plan to become transparent? Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be innovative? Imagine a combination of Flash and XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our C2C2C feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the term "transparent, impactful" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to exploit. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform?