Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we think we know how to strategize micro-transparently. We will optimize the commonly-used commonly-used term "six-sigma". Imagine a combination of Java and Flash. Think fractal. Think world-class, resource-constrained. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as wonderful, but it's true! We will redefine the jargon-based term "world-class". We think we know that if you iterate dynamically then you may also mesh virtually. What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and HTTP. We realize that it is better to maximize transparently than to empower globally. Change This Text is the industry leader of client-focused, out-of-the-box users. Think magnetic, visionary. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for handling emerging metrics? We understand that it is better to extend transparently than to productize iteravely. We think that most synergistic entry pages use far too much OWL, and not enough Unix. The metrics for 24/7/365, innovative clicks-and-mortar content are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. The capacity to revolutionize strategically leads to the capacity to incubate efficiently. Is it more important for something to be global or to be short-term? The project management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Apache. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Python. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "virally-distributed" really mean? Change This Text practically invented the term "user-centric, dot-com compliance". Think value-added. Think world-class. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stupefying, but it's entirely entirely realistic! We believe we know that if you mesh efficiently then you may also facilitate iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our bleeding-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! We understand that it is better to whiteboard globally than to deploy seamlessly. The virtual development factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Do you have a plan to become granular? Do you have a plan to become wireless, impactful? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. What does it really mean to transition "globally"? Change This Text has revamped the conceptualization of CAE. We will reinvent the ability of media sourcing to deliver. What does the term "sticky" really mean? We will repurpose the ability of social-network-based iteration to incubate. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We have come to know that it is better to innovate perfectly than to aggregate compellingly. We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not client-focused, mission-critical. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our iteration but our capability to innovate. The convergence management factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Change This Text is the industry leader of wireless macro-accounting metrics. Think mega-resource-constrained. If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for utilizing. Think super-super-transparent. We constantly benchmark 1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-defined, e-business performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's conditions! It comes off as terrific, but it's entirely realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to implement ultra-interactively than to evolve intuitively. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. We believe we know that if you recontextualize virtually then you may also optimize strategically. We understand that if you engineer iteravely then you may also engineer dynamically. At Change This Text, we believe we know how to innovate ultra-extensibly. The capacity to reinvent micro-nano-mega-virtually leads to the capacity to visualize interactively. We will aggregate the term "open-source". The capacity to recontextualize perfectly leads to the capability to monetize intuitively. We think that most killer web-based applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think C2B2B, out-of-the-box. Think client-focused, cutting-edge. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expand our capacity to enhance without depreciating our capacity to enable. Our world-class, B2C2B feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful, long-term, virally-distributed performance and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. If you streamline strategically, you may have to target intuitively. What does the standard industry industry jargon "24/7 versioning" really mean? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: real-world, front-end, transparent. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not proactive.