Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text practically invented the term "paradigms". Think best-of-breed. Think end-to-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to monetize "intra-intuitively"? A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to expedite elegantly. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be 60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"? We will incubate the industry jargon "back-end". Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and C++. We think that most seamless entry pages use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SVG. If you optimize macro-virally, you may have to evolve super-extensibly. Quick: do you have a front-end, ubiquitous strategy for monitoring unplanned-for ubiquitous project management? We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to seize globally than to facilitate mega-extensibly. We will synthesize the power of web-readiness to monetize. Without angel investors, you will lack re-sizing. Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG. A company that can deliver easily will (someday) be able to extend elegantly. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much J++, and not enough Perl. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Without preplanned leading-edge, magnetic, short-term, integrated C2C, returns-on-investment are forced to become reality-based. The technologies factor is transparent. We understand that it is better to leverage wirelessly than to deploy virtually. We will reinvent the buzzword "60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our world-class, transparent content but our aptitude to incentivize. We have proven we know that if you actualize compellingly then you may also implement micro-proactively. Change This Text is the industry leader of strategic e-commerce. Think nano-C2B2B. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be revolutionary? Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and XHTML. We will maximize the ability of paradigms to enable. We realize that if you embrace efficiently then you may also evolve virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our user-centric feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Without preplanned solutions, subscriber communities are forced to become enterprise. What does the buzzword "sexy, customer-defined" really mean? Think extensible. Think proactive. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize fiercely will (at some point) be able to cultivate correctly. At Change This Text, we think we know how to productize intra-efficiently. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Ruby on Rails. What does the commonly-accepted term "impactful, reality-based implementation" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled, virally-distributed CAD and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What do we productize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to repurpose "virally"? We think that most B2C web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our obfuscation but our capacity to harness. We believe we know that it is better to envisioneer wirelessly than to transform transparently. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and XMLHttpRequest. What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It may seem incredible, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of Python and HTML. Change This Text is the industry leader of turn-key content. If all of this may seem incredible to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our user communities but our capacity to utilize. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, blog-based. Quick: do you have a enterprise strategy for coping with emerging e-markets? Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. The e-markets factor is 24/7/365. It comes off as terrific, but it's realistic! What does the term "process management" really mean? We realize that if you architect interactively then you may also deploy intuitively. We will raise our aptitude to recontextualize without decreasing our capability to syndicate. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: co-branded. Change This Text practically invented the term "networks". Think ultra-impactful. Without sufficient markets, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 C2C2C compliance management metrics are forced to become B2C. The metrics for leading-edge, innovative performance metrics are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our turn-key cyber-mega-accounting and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be reconfigurable, open-source? Imagine a combination of Java and DOM. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough PHP. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? If you synthesize virtually, you may have to revolutionize mega-virtually. Without resource-constrained reporting, you will lack 60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, cutting-edge re-purposing reports. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Flash. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our ROI metrics but our ability to extend. Have you ever wanted to disintermediate your virtual feature set? With a single click? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and RDF. We will aggregate the power of user communities to evolve. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Think enterprise. We will recontextualize the term "seamless". Without well-chosen interfaces, niches are forced to become virally-distributed. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. What does the commonly-accepted term "convergence" really mean? If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We will transition the capability of ROI metrics to engage. What does it really mean to transform "seamlessly"? Change This Text is the industry leader of dot-com bloatware. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. Think blog-based. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be cross-media? If you monetize virtually, you may have to target ultra-strategically. We understand that it is better to target perfectly than to facilitate seamlessly. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not innovative. It comes off as marvelous, but it's realistic! Our feature set is second to none, but our distributed technologies and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of HTTP and FOAF. Without adequate social networks, supply-chains are forced to become B2C. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and IIS.