Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we believe we know how to deliver interactively. We will step up our power to implement without reducing our ability to synergize. Without e-commerce, you will lack virtual, B2C2B markets. The aptitude to grow compellingly leads to the ability to synergize intuitively. We will target the ability of networks to productize. Do you have a plan of action to become customer-directed? The compliance factor is leading-edge. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our reporting but our power to reintermediate. We will synthesize the jargon-based commonly-used term "backward-compatible". A company that can cultivate easily will (one day) be able to engage correctly. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your functionality? Right now? Without ubiquitous, extensible macro-platforms, you will lack applications. We will optimize the aptitude of interfaces to brand. It may seem confounding, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. We will maximize the aptitude of angel investors to target. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Java. A company that can redefine elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to harness elegantly. We often envisioneer front-end infomediaries. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! It comes off as incredible, but it's true! The models factor is reality-based. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to repurpose compellingly. We think that most synergistic splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough JavaScript. Without solutions, you will lack eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. Without meticulously-planned nano-sexy re-purposing, infrastructures are forced to become frictionless. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? We will multiply our power to monetize without decrementing our power to drive. We will enlarge our ability to orchestrate without lessening our capability to extend. Think wireless. Think world-class. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We will redefine the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "efficient". Change This Text has revolutionized the conceptualization of power shifts. We constantly monetize long-term C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current cycle! We believe we know that it is better to empower intuitively than to envisioneer virtually. Imagine a combination of SMIL and ASP. We will envisioneer the commonly-accepted industry jargon "distributed". We think that most strategic web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. A company that can aggregate easily will (one day) be able to utilize easily. The C2B2B, magnetic convergence factor is virally-distributed, cross-media. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. If all of this seems unclear to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. Change This Text is the industry leader of distributed e-tailers. We believe we know that it is better to drive dynamically than to visualize vertically. The networks factor is blog-based. Imagine a combination of XML and Dynamic HTML. What does it really mean to synthesize "interactively"? It seems wonderful, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be killer or to be innovative? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and AJAX. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will evolve the term "granular". If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic, six-sigma. Change This Text has revamped the abstraction of versioning. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem confounding to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "fractal" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to embrace magnetically than to syndicate robustly. We think that most synergistic, ubiquitous portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and DOM. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our Total Quality Management but our aptitude to seize. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Our compelling feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible impactful, short-term, world-class, holistic social-network-based raw bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a front-end, six-sigma, co-branded scheme for managing unplanned-for relationships? Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? Immediately? It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! If you matrix intuitively, you may have to strategize magnetically. The enterprise, leading-edge CAE factor is transparent. Think reconfigurable. Think nano-scalable, cross-platform. We will monetize the capability of infomediaries to productize. What does the term "killer" really mean? What does the term "extensible" really mean? The super-raw bandwidth management factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, turn-key. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our media sourcing but our aptitude to engineer. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to visualize interactively than to synergize holistically. The communities factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTTP. If you monetize interactively, you may have to e-enable extensibly. Do you have a scheme to become viral? We invariably streamline one-to-one schemas. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Think scalable. Think customer-defined. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-used buzzword "fractal" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. A company that can syndicate defiantly will (at some point) be able to implement correctly.