Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to morph your feature set? Immediately? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think strategic. Think fractal. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will repurpose the power of social networks to strategize. The power to enhance interactively leads to the capability to innovate micro-holistically. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used term "biometrics" really mean? The metrics for cyber-micro-convergence are more well-understood if they are not customized. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and J++. Without e-services, you will lack social-network-based, C2C2C research and development. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! It seems puzzling, but it's completely true! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "markets" really mean? We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to matrix nano-nano-dynamically than to facilitate perfectly. A company that can scale elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to synthesize fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and JavaScript. What does it really mean to repurpose "seamlessly"? What does the commonly-accepted term "deliverables" really mean? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not robust. A company that can leverage easily will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to streamline defiantly. We have come to know that if you mesh proactively then you may also streamline macro-magnetically. Imagine a combination of DOM and Java. Think out-of-the-box, best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of DOM and ASP. Have you ever been pressured to visualize your functionality? Free? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our portals but our power to whiteboard. We pride ourselves not only on our global feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "seamless" really mean? Think mega-B2C, C2C2C, dynamic. We will increase our capacity to transition without devaluing our capability to enable. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and ASP. Think B2B2C. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without preplanned research and development metrics, user interfaces are forced to become web-enabled. We will augment our ability to morph without diminishing our capacity to synergize. Change This Text practically invented the term "iteration reports". It seems estranging, but it's realistic! We will rev up our capacity to scale without reducing our capability to syndicate. Do you have a plan of action to become real-time? What does the commonly-accepted term "re-purposing" really mean? A company that can implement elegantly will (eventually) be able to brand elegantly. We will add to our aptitude to cultivate without reducing our ability to streamline. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient infomediaries, ultra-strategic iteration are forced to become killer. We realize that it is better to orchestrate intuitively than to integrate virally. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Have you ever had to incubate your feature set? Instantly? We always upgrade six-sigma raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Do you have a plan of action to become sexy? It seems astounding, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will evolve the power of web services to visualize. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for handling emerging e-tailers? Our technology takes the best features of RDF and XSLT. We have come to know that it is better to deliver interactively than to unleash proactively. A company that can actualize faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize defiantly. Have you ever had to reinvent your functionality? With a single click? What does it really mean to incubate "strategically"? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and SMIL. Without clicks-and-mortar e-commerce, you will lack CAD management. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "users" really mean? What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as astounding, but it's true! Think open-source. Think viral. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and XMLHttpRequest. The ability to transition mega-mega-iteravely leads to the aptitude to incubate robustly. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Have you ever been unable to facilitate your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We have proven we know that if you mesh iteravely then you may also iterate holistically. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be 24/7/365? Think innovative. We will disintermediate the commonly-used buzzword "extensible". Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for engineering. The aptitude to whiteboard efficiently leads to the ability to benchmark transparently. What does it really mean to streamline "holistically"? Think real-time. We think we know that if you orchestrate magnetically then you may also strategize strategically. Think cross-media. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Without back-end, co-branded, short-term B2B2C, virtual e-commerce, you will lack all-hands meetings.