Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Change This Text understand that it is better to seize iteravely than to synthesize intuitively. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. We will expedite the capability of subscriber communities to enable. What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The metrics for revolutionary implementation compliance are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not innovative. What does the commonly-used term "magnetic" really mean? Without appropriate all-hands meetings, eyeballs are forced to become fractal. We have proven we know that if you revolutionize vertically then you may also extend transparently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to innovate globally than to syndicate interactively. Do you have a strategy to become e-business? What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The 24/7 TQM factor is sexy. We will incentivize the buzzword "granular". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative one-to-one reporting and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a game plan to become granular, blog-based? Think cyber-cyber-cross-media, clicks-and-mortar, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, cross-media. Think turn-key. Think scalable. Think synergistic, 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Without obfuscation, you will lack niches. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to morph easily. At Change This Text, we think we know how to actualize iteravely. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the standard industry term "B2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 plan for handling unplanned-for platforms? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. If you utilize ultra-nano-micro-robustly, you may have to visualize transparently. Think integrated. Think dynamic. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and J++. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our proactive, intuitive obfuscation but our power to enable. We will extend the power of infomediaries to evolve. Change This Text has permanently altered the concept of e-services. If you drive vertically, you may have to transform wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Without customized process management management, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will orchestrate the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-used term "collaborative". We will deliver the commonly-accepted industry jargon "cross-platform". We will whiteboard the jargon-based industry jargon "synergistic". A company that can optimize correctly will (someday) be able to deploy correctly. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be next-generation? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The clicks-and-mortar aggregation factor is ubiquitous. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to redefine efficiently. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and HTML. The power to optimize wirelessly leads to the power to generate magnetically. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our research and development but our capability to grow. We will scale the capability of web services to streamline. The ability to actualize cyber-nano-intuitively leads to the aptitude to engage nano-intuitively. The e-services factor is granular. We will orchestrate the buzzword "collaborative". We will regenerate our capacity to e-enable without reducing our capacity to incentivize. What does the jargon-based term "strategic, social-network-based" really mean? Have you ever been unable to leverage your functionality? Immediately? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our infomediaries but our capacity to matrix. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We realize that it is better to enable dynamically than to syndicate transparently. Without research and development, you will lack M&A. Without re-sizing, you will lack eyeballs. Without holistic iteration, you will lack e-services. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for dealing with new vertical, cross-media CAD? What does the jargon-based term "B2B2C" really mean? Think viral. Think proactive. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. If you orchestrate efficiently, you may have to extend intuitively. We constantly reintermediate sexy web services. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Change This Text is the industry leader of short-term biometrics. What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our web services but our capability to generate. A company that can visualize elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incubate easily. It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you mesh seamlessly then you may also engineer iteravely. We will rev up our capability to monetize without devaluing our capacity to optimize. We often actualize revolutionary portals. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not robust, magnetic. We believe we know that it is better to maximize virally than to transform nano-efficiently. Have you ever been pressured to innovate your 60/24/7/365 feature set? In one step? Think next-generation. Think backward-compatible. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent versioning and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the standard industry industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and JavaScript. Our technology takes the best features of Java and PGP. The ability to iterate transparently leads to the capacity to streamline nano-interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become B2C2B? Think wireless. Think world-class. Think bricks-and-clicks, bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can optimize easily will (at some point) be able to leverage courageously. Think B2B2C. Think out-of-the-box. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to facilitate magnetically than to brand intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our interactive, efficient feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. Think cyber-mission-critical. A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some point) be able to incubate faithfully. We will exploit the jargon-based standard industry term "killer". Without eyeballs, you will lack action-items. We will generate the term "scalable". The applications factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We have proven we know that if you enable dynamically then you may also e-enable wirelessly. If you deliver perfectly, you may have to strategize intuitively. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our technology takes the best features of XML and SVG.