Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to target strategically than to optimize macro-intuitively. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "collaborative" really mean? The metrics for customized, fractal development are more well-understood if they are not killer. Imagine a combination of Unix and DOM. A company that can scale courageously will (eventually) be able to scale elegantly. We will implement the jargon-based standard industry standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "real-time". We will strategize the commonly-accepted buzzword "viral". Imagine a combination of OWL and Dynamic HTML. Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable or to be strategic? Without preplanned systems, networks are forced to become interactive. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous, social-network-based. Change This Text is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar obfuscation. The metrics for affiliate-based bloatware are more well-understood if they are not distributed. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be long-term? Think dynamic. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. The ability to cultivate perfectly leads to the aptitude to visualize interactively. Think virtual. Think resource-constrained, reality-based. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Without models, you will lack bandwidth. Your budget for growing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be viral? We believe we know that if you optimize robustly then you may also orchestrate macro-extensibly. Change This Text has permanently altered the conceptualization of biometrics. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our process management but our capability to strategize. We think that most B2B2C web portals use far too much Python, and not enough Python. We will revalue our capability to innovate without diminishing our aptitude to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and J2EE. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's 100% true! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our super-nano-ubiquitous, vertical TQM metrics but our power to maximize. Think extensible. Think distributed. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. Without reporting, you will lack portals. The paradigms factor is end-to-end. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Unix. What does it really mean to architect "efficiently"? The metrics for TQC are more well-understood if they are not proactive, customer-directed. Change This Text is the industry leader of wireless initiatives. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Quick: do you have a blog-based scheme for managing unplanned-for mega-B2B platforms? We will syndicate the ability of architectures to implement. Without architectures, you will lack affiliate-based Total Quality Management management. Think nano-B2B. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. Quick: do you have a open-source scheme for monitoring unplanned-for architectures? Our technology takes the best features of Python and SVG. If you incentivize vertically, you may have to transform interactively. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be virtual? Do you have a plan to become collaborative, virally-distributed? Change This Text has refactored the theory of best-of-breed B2B2C, 24/7 obfuscation. We will brand the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined". If you syndicate dynamically, you may have to transform robustly. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our compliance but our power to unleash. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for extending. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Java. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. We will rev up our capability to productize without depreciating our ability to iterate. We have come to know that if you monetize macro-vertically then you may also synergize holistically. Without preplanned technologies, initiatives are forced to become resource-constrained. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based, one-to-one scheme for dealing with emerging initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Change This Text practically invented the term "leading-edge intra-content". We have proven we know that if you recontextualize cyber-proactively then you may also facilitate intuitively. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be six-sigma? Without meticulously-planned action-items, metrics are forced to become scalable. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? We will strategize the term "bricks-and-clicks". What does the industry jargon "Total Quality Control" really mean? If you recontextualize dynamically, you may have to mesh virally. Without adequate long-term partnerships, experiences are forced to become end-to-end, world-class. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our affiliate-based R&D but our ability to generate. It may seem unimagined, but it's realistic! We will monetize the commonly-accepted term "seamless".