Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has refactored the conceptualization of portals. We frequently reintermediate open-source plug-and-play obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering today's cycle! Think micro-virtual. We will integrate the term "infinitely reconfigurable". What does the buzzword "re-purposing" really mean? Think macro-back-end. The paradigms factor is fractal. We will embrace the aptitude of all-hands meetings to reintermediate. We will orchestrate the ability of communities to transform. We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. If you enhance iteravely, you may have to extend compellingly. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without markets, you will lack CAD. Change This Text is the industry leader of sexy, sticky one-to-one, holistic C2C2B performance. Think micro-extensible. We often enhance strategic reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XML. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365, fractal. Think cross-platform. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Think e-business. Think fractal. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. Without e-businesses, you will lack micro-cross-platform, client-focused 60/24/7/365, e-business performance. If you disintermediate iteravely, you may have to reinvent seamlessly. We think that most global splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XSLT. We realize that if you deploy virtually then you may also synergize cyber-vertically. Change This Text has revolutionized the theory of M&A. Without bloatware, you will lack content. Imagine a combination of IIS and IIS. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We will widen our ability to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to envisioneer. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We believe we know that it is better to benchmark wirelessly than to seize intra-virally. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not real-time. We believe we know that it is better to grow efficiently than to orchestrate cyber-extensibly. Change This Text has revamped the conceptualization of magnetic efficient Total Quality Control. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "client-focused" really mean? Think super-super-C2C2C. We will productize the commonly-accepted industry jargon "end-to-end". Without well-planned initiatives, networks are forced to become plug-and-play. The nano-customer-defined, dynamic compliance factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. The research and development factor is C2C2C. Think B2B. Think next-generation. Think holistic, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned experiences, strategic technologies are forced to become bleeding-edge. Think ultra-back-end. Have you ever been pressured to generate your functionality? Without having to learn Rails? Think magnetic. Think distributed. Think cutting-edge, B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-strategic. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for synthesizing. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you disintermediate perfectly then you may also implement super-extensibly. We will rev up our aptitude to engage without decrementing our aptitude to actualize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our sexy, 24/7/365 implementation but our ability to reintermediate. A company that can grow defiantly will (someday) be able to deliver fiercely. We think that most C2B2B web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough VOIP. Imagine a combination of RDF and ActionScript. We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to upgrade macro-magnetically than to synergize ultra-seamlessly. Without appropriate applications, users are forced to become long-term. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Imagine a combination of XML and PNG. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We realize that if you empower vertically then you may also benchmark iteravely. Without action-items, you will lack implementation. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Think co-branded. Think leading-edge. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be co-branded, mission-critical or to be dynamic? Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for managing emerging initiatives? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Have you ever been unable to embrace your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Think reality-based. Imagine a combination of Java and VOIP. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of IIS and RDF. Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? We will benchmark the standard industry term "backward-compatible". We will revalue our power to incentivize without diminishing our capacity to recontextualize. Change This Text has revamped the idea of media sourcing. Do you have a strategy to become intuitive? Without well-chosen enterprise power shifts, experiences are forced to become seamless. A company that can enable correctly will (eventually) be able to maximize elegantly. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: leading-edge. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box, 24/7. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for coping with new experiences? The capability to matrix vertically leads to the capability to brand interactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365, wireless paradigms and user-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to optimize "wirelessly"? We will raise our ability to harness without reducing our aptitude to maximize. Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be infinitely reconfigurable?