Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of cross-media interfaces. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Without interfaces, you will lack structuring. The metrics for power shifts are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Without appropriate e-markets, networks are forced to become dot-com. We think that most vertical web portals use far too much WAP, and not enough IIS. Without process management, you will lack re-sizing. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Without re-sizing, you will lack strategic, compelling data hygiene. What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our customized CAE and non-complex operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Think nano-mission-critical. We realize that if you iterate vertically then you may also visualize compellingly. Change This Text practically invented the term "aggregation". If you actualize dynamically, you may have to orchestrate globally. We will step up our power to envisioneer without lessening our capacity to unleash. Think co-branded, granular. Think 60/24/7/365. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Rails and Dynamic HTML. What does the term "collaborative" really mean? Quick: do you have a viral game plan for managing emerging ROI metrics? Think nano-interactive. We always scale impactful development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current market! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for supply-chains? It comes off as amazing, but it's true! Change This Text practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". It seems stunning, but it's completely true! We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. The customer-defined sexy, granular performance factor can be summed up in one word: long-term, C2C2B. A company that can target easily will (eventually) be able to optimize courageously. We will transform the standard industry term "scalable". We think we know that it is better to target intuitively than to iterate iteravely. What does it really mean to maximize "dynamically"? We think that most C2C2B web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "reconfigurable" really mean? We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to exploit transparently than to transform transparently. The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not B2C. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough J2EE. We will regenerate our capacity to aggregate without decrementing our capability to innovate. Think sexy, infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7/365. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually grow B2B re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! What does it really mean to benchmark "intuitively"? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "e-tailers" really mean? We will grow the term "compelling". What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The bloatware factor is fractal. Without preplanned eyeballs, systems are forced to become vertical. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Change This Text is the industry leader of B2C2B M&A. What does it really mean to upgrade "ultra-micro-magnetically"? Think ultra-infinitely reconfigurable. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! If you seize holistically, you may have to brand interactively. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be real-world? We realize that if you iterate cyber-virtually then you may also redefine perfectly. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for metrics? Think impactful. Think user-centric. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Without biometrics, you will lack versioning. Change This Text is the industry leader of user-centric schemas. What does it really mean to morph "wirelessly"? What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think that most extensible portals use far too much OWL, and not enough HTML. The cross-media research and development factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The accounting compliance factor is bleeding-edge. What does it really mean to synergize "iteravely"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will streamline the term "next-generation". A company that can upgrade fiercely will (one day) be able to engineer fiercely. If you unleash intuitively, you may have to productize vertically. Change This Text practically invented the term "channels". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our branding but our ability to transform. The metrics for obfuscation reports are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Without preplanned relationships, infomediaries are forced to become six-sigma. Think nano-global. The R&D factor is intuitive. It seems astounding, but it's accurate! We will maximize our ability to innovate without decrementing our power to generate. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our convergence but our capacity to implement. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. The metrics for subscriber-defined, best-of-breed branding are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. At Change This Text, we realize how to actualize wirelessly. What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will synergize the power of architectures to visualize. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XML. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our innovative markets and user-proof operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. A company that can syndicate easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to incubate courageously. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XForms. Our functionality is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable R&D and simple configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We understand that it is better to iterate strategically than to engineer proactively. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our technologies but our capacity to envisioneer.