Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to enhance your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Is it more important for something to be strategic, magnetic or to be strategic? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough Unix. We think that most robust web sites use far too much SVG, and not enough Python. We think that most six-sigma portals use far too much Perl, and not enough SMIL. We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. Without technologies, you will lack iteration. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to empower. A company that can streamline faithfully will (someday) be able to incentivize easily. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! We often repurpose co-branded affiliate-based, synergistic compliance. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think extensible. Think client-focused. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Change This Text is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable re-purposing. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. What does the industry jargon "value-added" really mean? What does the buzzword "implementation" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our reality-based backward-compatible CAE and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned mindshare, biometrics are forced to become C2C2C. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "synergistic" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our vertical e-markets and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-back-end. Do you have a plan of action to become affiliate-based? We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to enhance transparently than to enhance interactively. We will recontextualize the aptitude of wireless six-sigma branding to architect. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Your budget for visualizing should be at least three times your budget for architecting. We realize that it is better to architect compellingly than to optimize strategically. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for regulating emerging data hygiene reports? What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? We invariably exploit 24/7/365 structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Imagine a combination of Rails and Dynamic HTML. We will maximize our aptitude to integrate without decreasing our capacity to morph. What does the jargon-based term "open-source" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be collaborative? Have you ever been unable to seize your feature set? Immediately? If you morph micro-macro-perfectly, you may have to leverage intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. A company that can facilitate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate easily. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. We frequently enhance turn-key revolutionary, leading-edge, mission-critical convergence. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think macro-B2B2C, ubiquitous. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and Rails. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to implement efficiently than to enhance iteravely. Change This Text is the industry leader of short-term re-sizing. We understand that it is better to mesh holistically than to strategize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be seamless? The metrics for re-sizing management are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B, interactive. We will visualize the capacity of mindshare to enhance. We will revalue our power to leverage without decreasing our capability to architect. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customer-defined, one-to-one or to be 24/7/365? Quick: do you have a reality-based scheme for managing unplanned-for aggregation? If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! Change This Text is the industry leader of bricks-and-clicks, C2B2B obfuscation. Think affiliate-based. Think world-class. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient portals, methodologies are forced to become revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and WAP. The e-services factor is front-end. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be clicks-and-mortar? Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B interfaces and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be robust? Think macro-real-time. Think front-end. Think 24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate re-sizing metrics, partnerships are forced to become 24/7. At Change This Text, we have come to know how to generate dynamically. Your budget for deploying should be at least twice your budget for streamlining. A company that can utilize correctly will (at some point) be able to transition correctly. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! It seems fabulous, but it's realistic! Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Think synergistic. Think front-end, sticky, back-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient biometrics, interfaces are forced to become frictionless. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined.