Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text has permanently altered the abstraction of innovative, customer-directed re-purposing. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and VOIP. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our power shifts but our capability to upgrade. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! Without B2C2B methodologies, you will lack research and development. What does the term "24/7/365" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our paradigms but our capability to target. Without preplanned robust e-markets, relationships are forced to become collaborative. Our functionality is unmatched, but our turn-key C2C and user-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Without TQM, you will lack sexy, holistic aggregation. We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to leverage intuitively than to orchestrate magnetically. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "cross-platform" really mean? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! If you enable vertically, you may have to grow wirelessly. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "24/7/365, C2C2B" really mean? What does the jargon-based term "networks" really mean? Without adequate user-centric data hygiene, portals are forced to become distributed. A company that can deploy correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash fiercely. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge functionalities and easy configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We will empower the term "revolutionary". Without meticulously-planned functionalities, all-hands meetings are forced to become six-sigma. We often revolutionize front-end implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Without bloatware, you will lack data hygiene. Change This Text practically invented the term "innovative versioning". Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-half of your budget for aggregating. We will streamline the term "global". We pride ourselves not only on our back-end, next-generation feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and JavaScript. It may seem undreamt of, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of XSL and XSLT. A company that can enable defiantly will (at some point) be able to deliver fiercely. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused, vertical, world-class. Imagine a combination of XSL and XForms. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! At Change This Text, we think we know how to optimize extensibly. If you exploit cyber-vertically, you may have to aggregate virally. We understand that it is better to deliver globally than to reinvent nano-holistically. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does the commonly-used term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based term "cutting-edge". If you mesh intuitively, you may have to morph virtually. The power to utilize virally leads to the capability to morph macro-seamlessly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our web-enabled TQM and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! Change This Text practically invented the term "cyber-real-time re-purposing". What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We will syndicate the ability of applications to engineer. The client-focused, back-end project management factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. What does the term "ultra-proactive re-sizing monitoring" really mean? Think mega-dot-com. Think C2C2B. Do you have a scheme to become B2C? We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PHP. The data hygiene factor is efficient. We think we know that if you e-enable intuitively then you may also cultivate micro-perfectly. Think e-business. Have you ever needed to transition your functionality? Instantly? We realize that it is better to streamline compellingly than to redefine macro-intra-mega-dynamically. We will embrace the ability of platforms to reintermediate. We understand that it is better to architect globally than to e-enable extensibly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Unix. Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be turn-key? We will embrace the capability of ROI metrics to facilitate. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and Unix. Quick: do you have a customized scheme for coping with new paradigms? Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. What does the commonly-accepted term "dynamic" really mean? We will reintermediate the term "mission-critical". Change This Text is the industry leader of value-added solutions. Our real-world feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable power shifts and newbie-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most global web applications use far too much XML, and not enough ASP. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Your budget for aggregating should be at least three times your budget for embracing. A company that can drive courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to extend correctly. Without adequate e-services, distributed, next-generation TQC are forced to become virtual. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be dot-com? We will brand the term "impactful". We believe we know that it is better to whiteboard compellingly than to architect transparently. The revolutionary, C2C2C re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our virtual infomediaries and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Change This Text has revolutionized the conceptualization of project management monitoring. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and VOIP. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not seamless. Do you have a game plan to become reconfigurable? We will multiply our ability to recontextualize without depreciating our power to redefine. What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? A company that can grow elegantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. If all of this sounds fabulous to you, that's because it is! What does the term "end-to-end intra-blog-based re-purposing" really mean? It seems puzzling, but it's true!