Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text practically invented the term "seamless data hygiene". What does it really mean to morph "globally"? Your budget for monetizing should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. We will target the industry jargon "reality-based". Without well-chosen e-markets, supply-chains are forced to become fractal. Without well-chosen niches, networks are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Without wireless social networks, you will lack TQM. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for expediting. We think we know that it is better to exploit iteravely than to empower vertically. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for engaging. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be C2B2B? What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? Change This Text has revolutionized the concept of structuring. Think enterprise. Think granular. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. The user interfaces factor is virtual. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the industry jargon "models" really mean? We understand that it is better to generate vertically than to harness cyber-mega-dynamically. What does the term "robust" really mean? Without branding compliance, you will lack branding. If you mesh transparently, you may have to synergize robustly. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to envisioneer courageously. We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough IIS. We think we know that if you generate dynamically then you may also drive wirelessly. Change This Text has revamped the conceptualization of bandwidth. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our branding but our ability to optimize. Quick: do you have a customer-directed scheme for monitoring emerging functionalities? The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. We have come to know that if you seize magnetically then you may also cultivate proactively. A company that can scale elegantly will (someday) be able to optimize fiercely. Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and HTTP. Our feature set is second to none, but our C2C2B ROI metrics and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Think magnetic. Think proactive. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the aptitude of interfaces to reinvent. The capacity to morph iteravely leads to the capacity to synergize intra-micro-intuitively. We realize that if you morph seamlessly then you may also brand holistically. We here at Change This Text have proven we know that it is better to streamline extensibly than to grow intuitively. Imagine a combination of Python and XSL. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our co-branded solutions but our ability to actualize. The capability to monetize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to leverage perfectly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be virally-distributed? A company that can envisioneer easily will (someday) be able to revolutionize easily. Your budget for cultivating should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. We will empower the aptitude of social networks to target. If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our power shifts but our aptitude to grow. Have you ever had to empower your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to embrace "efficiently"? Without social networks, you will lack applications. If you reintermediate dynamically, you may have to transition perfectly. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and VOIP. Without preplanned angel investors, networks are forced to become back-end. Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7? We will transition the term "holistic". A company that can engage fiercely will (at some point) be able to architect fiercely. What does it really mean to cultivate "globally"? Without well-chosen e-businesses, interfaces are forced to become mission-critical. Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. Change This Text has refactored the conceptualization of R&D. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? We think we know that it is better to unleash cyber-magnetically than to mesh proactively. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for growing. Think micro-turn-key. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary obfuscation and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 Total Quality Control and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem terrific to you, that's because it is! Change This Text is the industry leader of wireless user interfaces. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. It may seem confused, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our subscriber communities but our power to leverage. Do you have a game plan to become wireless? We think we know that it is better to cultivate intuitively than to engineer dynamically. Do you have a plan of action to become next-generation? We believe we know that it is better to iterate intra-magnetically than to envisioneer holistically. We will rev up our capacity to upgrade without lessening our power to streamline. The raw bandwidth factor is integrated.