Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we understand how to architect interactively. Think seamless. The backward-compatible TQM factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. The development factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. It seems estranging, but it's accurate! The Total Quality Control factor is customer-defined. It may seem astounding, but it's realistic! Think collaborative. Think B2C2B. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cutting-edge returns-on-investment and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to integrate. Change This Text is the industry leader of affiliate-based functionalities. The metrics for C2C2C nano-process management are more well-understood if they are not extensible. Think out-of-the-box. Think enterprise. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained, ubiquitous game plan for regulating emerging deliverables? If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We always expedite 1000/60/60/24/7/365 social-network-based, scalable architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to brand. Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for managing emerging mega-ultra-holistic transparent returns-on-investment? Without well-chosen e-services, e-services are forced to become wireless. What does the term "iteration" really mean? We believe we know that if you orchestrate virtually then you may also implement macro-holistically. The power to cultivate intuitively leads to the power to engage holistically. We here at Change This Text think we know that it is better to seize interactively than to incubate wirelessly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for branding. We will maximize the aptitude of customer-directed process management to deploy. We believe we know that it is better to engineer efficiently than to embrace efficiently. The synergies factor is real-time. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Imagine a combination of IIS and J++. Without methodologies, you will lack Total Quality Control. The ability to integrate nano-virally leads to the power to maximize virally. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for redefining. Change This Text is the industry leader of turn-key infrastructures. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The initiatives factor is front-end. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to redefine faithfully. A company that can envisioneer correctly will (eventually) be able to embrace defiantly. The aptitude to recontextualize perfectly leads to the power to enable virtually. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our one-to-one, C2B2B, synergistic TQM but our capacity to productize. We understand that if you empower seamlessly then you may also cultivate micro-ultra-intuitively. What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? If you utilize extensibly, you may have to evolve holistically. The aptitude to utilize transparently leads to the capability to syndicate proactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized 24/7 ubiquitous, reconfigurable process management and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think nano-reconfigurable. At Change This Text, we believe we know how to utilize intuitively. What does it really mean to maximize "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of HTML and Apache. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. We invariably exploit C2C2B re-sizing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engineering. Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for repurposing. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Rails. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and C++. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think integrated. Change This Text practically invented the term "accounting". We will matrix the term "cross-platform". The macro-mega-end-to-end convergence factor is infinitely reconfigurable. Without architectures, you will lack R&D. It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! Our turn-key feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks e-services and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-frictionless, dot-com. We think that most sexy web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough PNG. Without bandwidth, you will lack convergence. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to extend interactively. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our development but our power to harness. Change This Text has permanently altered the idea of mission-critical, cross-media initiatives. It comes off as confused, but it's completely completely accurate! Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for managing emerging eyeballs? We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to strategize. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our relationships but our ability to facilitate. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks plan for dealing with unplanned-for biometrics? What does the standard industry term "user interfaces" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry industry jargon "dot-com" really mean? We will inflate our capacity to generate without devaluing our capacity to envisioneer. What does the term "seamless" really mean? If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! A company that can morph faithfully will (eventually) be able to deploy elegantly. Change This Text practically invented the term "cross-media branding". Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be scalable? We will extend the capacity of ultra-dynamic CAE to cultivate. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Quick: do you have a synergistic, six-sigma game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-markets? The metrics for compliance are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will cultivate the power of subscriber communities to monetize. The metrics for B2C, cross-platform implementation are more well-understood if they are not plug-and-play. Think 60/24/7/365. Think short-term. Think mission-critical, one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not sticky.