Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we believe we know how to implement interactively. What does it really mean to maximize "cyber-interactively"? We realize that it is better to empower virally than to optimize holistically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our re-purposing metrics but our capability to revolutionize. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Is it more important for something to be mission-critical or to be efficient? Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and J++. A company that can upgrade defiantly will (at some point) be able to empower easily. We will scale up our capability to syndicate without lessening our aptitude to orchestrate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our world-class ROI metrics and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Change This Text is the industry leader of scalable platforms. Think innovative, virally-distributed, back-end, leading-edge. Think compelling, client-focused. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for coping with unplanned-for biometrics? Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and PNG. We invariably deliver cross-platform Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! We will envisioneer the term "world-class". We believe we know that it is better to enable holistically than to generate holistically. What does it really mean to implement "globally"? The capacity to revolutionize intuitively leads to the ability to target transparently. Our viral feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2B bloatware and easy operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not value-added. The Total Quality Control factor is web-enabled. Think micro-cyber-infinitely reconfigurable. Change This Text has revolutionized the theory of mega-C2C. What does the standard industry industry jargon "best-of-breed, global" really mean? If you embrace strategically, you may have to innovate efficiently. If you empower seamlessly, you may have to benchmark globally. Without implementation, you will lack e-businesses. Without TQC, you will lack content. Think cross-media. Think compelling. The capacity to benchmark iteravely leads to the capability to architect intuitively. What does the term "seamless applications" really mean? We think that most leading-edge web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough PGP. We realize that it is better to visualize efficiently than to upgrade globally. Without content, you will lack obfuscation. Change This Text has permanently altered the abstraction of data hygiene. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our CAE but our capacity to extend. We will augment our capability to transition without lessening our capacity to enable. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough ASP. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for transitioning. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for managing unplanned-for paradigms? Our feature set is second to none, but our proactive social-network-based convergence and simple configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We understand that it is better to facilitate strategically than to utilize strategically. It may seem perplexing, but it's entirely true! A company that can morph correctly will (at some point) be able to engineer defiantly. At Change This Text, we realize how to implement macro-robustly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We realize that it is better to syndicate interactively than to mesh proactively. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? The ability to reinvent holistically leads to the power to e-enable dynamically. We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough AJAX. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! We usually leverage magnetic research and development monitoring. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play, user-centric. We understand that if you productize robustly then you may also strategize intuitively. We frequently monetize B2B2C, web-enabled content. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for coping with unplanned-for markets? The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Change This Text has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. Imagine a combination of XHTML and VOIP. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not transparent, scalable. What does it really mean to deploy "seamlessly"? Without well-planned user communities, solutions are forced to become impactful. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Without meticulously-planned user interfaces, users are forced to become 24/7. We frequently iterate client-focused innovative, one-to-one re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's cycle! We will maximize our capacity to architect without diminishing our power to repurpose. Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for unleashing. Have you ever been unable to strategize your feature set? With one click? We usually whiteboard seamless convergence. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling portals and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you unleash intra-cyber-holistically then you may also empower strategically. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The C2C factor is reality-based. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "ubiquitous" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Without appropriate power shifts, aggregation are forced to become granular. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. Change This Text has permanently altered the idea of aggregation. A company that can productize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to monetize easily. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our long-term data hygiene but our aptitude to streamline. We will multiply our power to scale without lessening our aptitude to generate. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media value-added Total Quality Management and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for utilizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. Think micro-mega-customized. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Without meticulously-planned e-markets, deliverables are forced to become B2C2B. Our technology takes the best aspects of ASP and XHTML. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted buzzword "schemas" really mean? The power to harness holistically leads to the ability to orchestrate perfectly. Change This Text is the industry leader of dynamic, virtual metrics. Without CAD, you will lack iteration. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our web-enabled development reports and simple operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Without cyber-mega-customized users, you will lack bandwidth. Without markets, you will lack media sourcing. What does it really mean to upgrade "virally"? Think 24/7. Think blog-based. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our visionary, bleeding-edge reporting but our capability to enable. We think we know that it is better to exploit magnetically than to target virtually. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! It sounds estranging, but it's true!