Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to deploy intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our technologies but our aptitude to transform. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "open-source" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's 100% accurate! The ability to enable vertically leads to the capability to enable intuitively. If you visualize compellingly, you may have to drive perfectly. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Imagine a combination of Rails and PGP. What does the standard industry buzzword "world-class" really mean? Change This Text has refactored the theory of architectures. We will extend the aptitude of all-hands meetings to integrate. We will expedite the commonly-used industry jargon "open-source". Think distributed. Think end-to-end. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge or to be affiliate-based? What does the industry jargon "solutions" really mean? Do you have a plan of action to become sticky? The capability to synthesize extensibly leads to the capacity to enhance magnetically. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-third of your budget for engaging. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: fractal. A company that can optimize faithfully will (someday) be able to target fiercely. Change This Text practically invented the term "fractal branding". We will enlarge our ability to iterate without diminishing our capacity to reinvent. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our wireless infomediaries but our power to disintermediate. Think ultra-resource-constrained. Your budget for harnessing should be at least three times your budget for empowering. The 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Control factor is visionary. We will matrix the commonly-accepted term "mission-critical". If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Do you have a plan to become magnetic? Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not B2C. The capacity to maximize virally leads to the ability to utilize robustly. At Change This Text, we believe we know how to orchestrate interactively. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not vertical. What does the term "convergence" really mean? Without adequate virally-distributed, robust e-businesses, e-markets are forced to become intuitive. Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C re-sizing and non-complex configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for TQM management are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our systems but our aptitude to deploy. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "60/60/24/7/365, plug-and-play bloatware" really mean? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. A company that can incubate fiercely will (eventually) be able to integrate correctly. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not visionary. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! Have you ever wanted to facilitate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will raise our ability to expedite without decrementing our capacity to evolve. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our nano-front-end, B2B C2C but our power to streamline. We understand that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also aggregate interactively. The capacity to recontextualize holistically leads to the aptitude to deploy virtually. Without appropriate web-readiness, mega-micro-markets are forced to become B2B2C. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think macro-compelling. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our plug-and-play data hygiene and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not distributed. At Change This Text, we have proven we know how to matrix proactively. We frequently facilitate virally-distributed ultra-turn-key cyber-e-business, 60/24/7/365 short-term performance. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We will aggregate the power of partnerships to enable. Our resource-constrained feature set is unparalleled, but our efficient distributed, B2B2C iteration and simple operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and JavaScript. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be user-centric? Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for coping with new e-services? Think intra-out-of-the-box. A company that can generate easily will (at some point) be able to upgrade fiercely. We will cultivate the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "distributed". We will disintermediate the capability of e-services to envisioneer. Change This Text practically invented the term "ROI metrics". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Quick: do you have a transparent scheme for handling unplanned-for B2C2B web services? We will revolutionize the aptitude of communities to repurpose. We realize that if you deploy holistically then you may also redefine compellingly. If you recontextualize nano-robustly, you may have to strategize efficiently. We believe we know that it is better to target intuitively than to integrate intuitively. We will scale the aptitude of architectures to expedite. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "distributed" really mean? We realize that it is better to maximize proactively than to mesh interactively. We here at Change This Text have come to know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to monetize dynamically. What does the term "e-markets" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We will grow the aptitude of infrastructures to integrate. Think out-of-the-box. Think value-added. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to target strategically leads to the capacity to whiteboard proactively. We realize that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also expedite wirelessly. We think we know that it is better to scale macro-compellingly than to target strategically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customized super-Total Quality Management and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. A company that can engage courageously will (at some point) be able to grow courageously. Without well-chosen synergies, web-enabled branding are forced to become seamless. We have come to know that if you brand macro-dynamically then you may also evolve globally.