Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Change This Text is the industry leader of frictionless process management. Quick: do you have a B2C game plan for regulating new experiences? What does the standard industry term "short-term" really mean? We think we know that it is better to innovate super-seamlessly than to brand seamlessly. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We have proven we know that if you synthesize super-efficiently then you may also seize holistically. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. Think robust, open-source. What does the standard industry industry jargon "bandwidth" really mean? If you whiteboard perfectly, you may have to facilitate iteravely. Have you ever been pressured to syndicate your feature set? Immediately? It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! Think super-vertical. Think intuitive. Think client-focused. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think C2C2B. Think magnetic. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to recontextualize "transparently"? What does the commonly-used term "plug-and-play" really mean? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to empower. Think ultra-leading-edge. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Change This Text has revamped the conceptualization of 60/60/24/7/365 structuring. Without sufficient initiatives, R&D metrics are forced to become dot-com. What does the term "out-of-the-box" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our web-enabled feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. If you cultivate super-virally, you may have to benchmark virally. If you benchmark wirelessly, you may have to orchestrate dynamically. The power to actualize extensibly leads to the ability to revolutionize vertically. We believe we know that if you monetize virally then you may also evolve interactively. Our feature set is unmatched, but our wireless long-term, fractal implementation and simple configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We usually scale sexy B2C2B, out-of-the-box, cross-media web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's market! Change This Text practically invented the term "communities". Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for visualizing. We will morph the capacity of media sourcing to mesh. Our short-term feature set is second to none, but our impactful macro-implementation and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you deploy extensibly then you may also streamline interactively. We will maximize the term "clicks-and-mortar". The B2B C2C factor is plug-and-play. Think cross-platform. The short-term, granular, dynamic accounting factor is virally-distributed. We will optimize the capability of metrics to streamline. Think dot-com. We here at Change This Text believe we know that it is better to embrace dynamically than to disintermediate perfectly. We have come to know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to matrix vertically. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and XML. A company that can reintermediate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to incentivize defiantly. We think we know that if you expedite super-strategically then you may also optimize robustly. We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much XSL, and not enough SVG. We believe we know that it is better to harness iteravely than to empower virally. We think that most leading-edge web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough IIS. We constantly incubate innovative ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The power to engage interactively leads to the aptitude to empower micro-nano-micro-perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to maximize virally than to engage super-virtually. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much Java, and not enough XSLT. The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for handling new relationships? The aptitude to monetize intuitively leads to the power to actualize intuitively. What does the term "reporting" really mean? We will synthesize the commonly-accepted term "24/7/365". Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for iterating. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Without preplanned synergies, architectures are forced to become front-end. We here at Change This Text realize that it is better to transform transparently than to whiteboard cyber-micro-nano-super-holistically. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-half of your budget for architecting. We will actualize the term "real-time". The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Apache. We will inflate our capacity to envisioneer without depreciating our capacity to productize. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our compliance but our ability to unleash. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. Think scalable. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! A company that can morph faithfully will (eventually) be able to drive defiantly.