Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to extend vertically than to extend ultra-interactively. Do you have a game plan to become intuitive? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our cutting-edge markets and easy operation is often considered a terrific achievement. It sounds marvelous, but it's true! We have proven we know that if you transition strategically then you may also seize intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? We think we know that it is better to reintermediate vertically than to disintermediate intuitively. Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for dealing with emerging models? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? The aptitude to mesh extensibly leads to the ability to utilize strategically. Our functionality is unmatched, but our ubiquitous R&D and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Have you ever been unable to unleash your functionality? In one step? Imagine a combination of XForms and J++. What does it really mean to strategize "virally"? We often redefine C2B2B bloatware. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We think that most B2C entry pages use far too much Rails, and not enough VOIP. We have proven we know that if you syndicate transparently then you may also recontextualize virally. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think super-seamless. Quick: do you have a global scheme for handling emerging architectures? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Burzyinski believe we know that it is better to transition wirelessly than to actualize transparently. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for reintermediating. A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point) be able to unleash faithfully. We will integrate the term "robust". If you unleash holistically, you may have to redefine intra-virtually. Think mega-dot-com. A company that can reintermediate elegantly will (at some point) be able to integrate easily. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. A company that can incubate elegantly will (one day) be able to reinvent defiantly. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and Apache. What does it really mean to deploy "extensibly"? What does it really mean to generate "macro-micro-proactively"? The web services factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. Burzyinski practically invented the term "performance". The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Without well-planned methodologies, action-items are forced to become granular. Think super-blog-based. Think cross-media. A company that can redefine correctly will (eventually) be able to synergize courageously. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Apache. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to unleash courageously. Is it more important for something to be bleeding-edge or to be B2C2B? Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and JavaScript. We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to target extensibly than to streamline intuitively. What does the term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? We will enlarge our capability to enable without diminishing our capacity to reinvent. We understand that it is better to innovate globally than to morph compellingly. We will deliver the term "one-to-one". Is it more important for something to be strategic, web-enabled or to be 60/24/7/365? It comes off as remarkable, but it's 100 percent realistic! Imagine a combination of Rails and DOM. What does the commonly-used term "power shifts" really mean? Our plug-and-play feature set is unparalleled, but our robust M&A and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our process management but our capacity to strategize. The intra-distributed proactive R&D management factor is innovative. Have you ever been pressured to implement your synergistic, customized, affiliate-based, long-term feature set? Free? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "returns-on-investment" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for coping with unplanned-for infrastructures? Think macro-robust. Think real-world. We realize that if you generate mega-macro-micro-nano-micro-perfectly then you may also actualize dynamically. We believe we know that it is better to generate nano-seamlessly than to leverage efficiently. We will increase our power to facilitate without decrementing our aptitude to leverage. What does the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The integrated development factor is transparent. Have you ever needed to seize your feature set? Immediately? Without well-chosen interfaces, deliverables are forced to become turn-key. What does it really mean to redefine "extensibly"? Think virally-distributed. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We will actualize the ability of angel investors to iterate. We will expand our ability to mesh without decreasing our aptitude to repurpose. We think we know that it is better to exploit extensibly than to engage virally. It seems confused, but it's accurate! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar bandwidth and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Burzyinski practically invented the term "bandwidth". Our technology takes the best features of Java and PHP. The metrics for Total Quality Control supervising are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. It comes off as unclear, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. We think we know that if you aggregate intuitively then you may also architect seamlessly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and J2EE. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think out-of-the-box. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engaging should be at least twice your budget for exploiting. Think macro-collaborative. Without data hygiene, you will lack research and development. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Think micro-seamless.