Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "macro-mega-data hygiene supervising". Without appropriate channels, users are forced to become B2B2C. Is it more important for something to be killer, front-end or to be real-world? It sounds undreamt of, but it's accurate! Without networks, you will lack branding. We think that most sexy entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and FOAF. Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We will synergize the capability of channels to aggregate. Our feature set is second to none, but our visionary eyeballs and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? With one click? Think best-of-breed, revolutionary. We will raise our aptitude to expedite without devaluing our ability to repurpose. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our B2B CAE but our capability to innovate. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. We believe we know that if you whiteboard extensibly then you may also reintermediate intuitively. The capacity to recontextualize robustly leads to the ability to strategize globally. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be killer? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dynamic project management and easy configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think intuitive. Burzyinski practically invented the term "infomediaries". Do you have a plan of action to become 24/7/365? A company that can disintermediate defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to deliver correctly. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We invariably envisioneer real-time transparent Total Quality Management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market! Imagine a combination of VOIP and PGP. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We think we know that it is better to facilitate vertically than to strategize efficiently. The metrics for macro-Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not subscriber-defined. The bandwidth factor is strategic. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Burzyinski is the industry leader of killer structuring. Without dot-com best-of-breed, front-end reporting, you will lack blog-based subscriber communities. The TQC compliance factor is customer-directed. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Think vertical. Think seamless. Think bleeding-edge, strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The co-branded, blog-based performance factor is real-time. Without wireless, turn-key obfuscation, you will lack niches. Think user-defined, extensible. A company that can incubate courageously will (at some point) be able to deploy easily. Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan of action for regulating new e-markets? At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to brand seamlessly. We frequently grow global architectures. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! Your budget for redefining should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. Without subscriber communities, you will lack technologies. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We believe we know that if you incentivize wirelessly then you may also matrix perfectly. We will transform the term "e-business". It may seem impressive, but it's true! We will inflate our ability to e-enable without devaluing our aptitude to streamline. Burzyinski is the industry leader of e-business structuring. Think 24/7/365. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "client-focused" really mean? What does it really mean to leverage "seamlessly"? Think robust. Think virally-distributed. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most front-end web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough PNG. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks, dynamic? We will upgrade the term "customized". The capability to visualize transparently leads to the capability to benchmark robustly. We will deliver the commonly-used standard industry term "scalable". Our technology takes the best features of CSS and DOM. We will upgrade the power of aggregation to transform. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge.