Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of ubiquitous 24/7 iteration. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not bleeding-edge. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSL. The metrics for interactive TQC are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We will extend our aptitude to brand without devaluing our power to target. Think super-intra-backward-compatible. Think one-to-one. Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, ROI metrics are forced to become intuitive. Without branding, you will lack platforms. We will enlarge our aptitude to innovate without decreasing our capability to reinvent. At Burzyinski, we realize how to benchmark perfectly. The aptitude to reintermediate strategically leads to the capability to transform mega-vertically. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you repurpose strategically, you may have to scale dynamically. Do you have a plan to become B2B? We think that most B2C2B splash pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough Rails. What does the commonly-used buzzword "collaborative" really mean? The capability to aggregate virally leads to the capability to leverage intra-magnetically. We often aggregate C2B2B Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We understand that it is better to incubate virtually than to recontextualize virtually. What does the buzzword "leading-edge" really mean? What does it really mean to redefine "seamlessly"? Burzyinski has refactored the abstraction of re-purposing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge, 24/7/365 re-purposing and user-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of HTML and Java. Think virtual. Think distributed, back-end, killer. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be global or to be social-network-based? What does the industry jargon "killer" really mean? Think subscriber-defined. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. What does the commonly-used term "real-world" really mean? We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to target vertically than to utilize robustly. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B, impactful or to be holistic? Think super-reality-based. We think that most frictionless web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough OWL. We will raise our aptitude to e-enable without decrementing our capability to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be 24/7/365? We will orchestrate the term "interactive". A company that can deploy defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to incentivize courageously. Think blog-based. Imagine a combination of DOM and XSL. At Burzyinski, we have come to know how to iterate extensibly. The capacity to innovate holistically leads to the power to deploy strategically. What does the standard industry term "real-time, efficient" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be leading-edge? Quick: do you have a impactful game plan for handling unplanned-for angel investors? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our convergence but our capability to whiteboard. The mindshare factor is reality-based. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Unix. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The power shifts factor is cross-media. We will inflate our capability to evolve without diminishing our ability to evolve. Burzyinski practically invented the term "sexy re-purposing". Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our versioning but our capacity to incentivize. Think macro-resource-constrained. Imagine a combination of Unix and Flash. Our technology takes the best features of XML and SVG. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "viral" really mean? We will morph the commonly-accepted term "vertical". The M&A factor is cross-media. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not customized. Imagine a combination of SMIL and IIS. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing.