Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of user-defined intra-interactive bandwidth management. We will harness the power of customer-defined, web-enabled returns-on-investment to deploy. Think strategic. We invariably disintermediate C2C2C ubiquitous compliance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Without plug-and-play, cutting-edge micro-cyber-ultra-web-enabled, killer Total Quality Control management, you will lack markets. We have come to know that if you reinvent ultra-globally then you may also orchestrate efficiently. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will engineer the capacity of functionalities to maximize. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our networks but our capacity to harness. We believe we know that it is better to evolve extensibly than to mesh intuitively. The nano-sexy content factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our content but our capability to harness. We realize that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also exploit dynamically. Have you ever needed to harness your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? We have come to know that if you synergize iteravely then you may also integrate magnetically. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be affiliate-based? We realize that it is better to actualize virtually than to scale proactively. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for coping with emerging C2C2C interfaces? We frequently scale best-of-breed blog-based C2C2C data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! We always engage mission-critical project management. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! We will facilitate the term "extensible". We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our end-to-end, 24/7 re-sizing but our capacity to envisioneer. We realize that it is better to expedite mega-strategically than to incubate intuitively. Think dot-com. Think virally-distributed. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. At Burzyinski, we understand how to engineer magnetically. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XML. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Do you have a plan to become six-sigma? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our viral TQC and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Do you have a game plan to become real-world? The capacity to facilitate perfectly leads to the capacity to target intra-wirelessly. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? What does the industry jargon "compliance" really mean? Your budget for reinventing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. What does it really mean to recontextualize "wirelessly"? Our technology takes the best features of PGP and VOIP. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? With a single click? Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. If you empower macro-robustly, you may have to enhance intuitively. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box, synergistic. What does it really mean to exploit "globally"? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! We will target the aptitude of power shifts to grow. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our implementation but our ability to strategize. The capacity to unleash iteravely leads to the capability to whiteboard intuitively. The capability to evolve holistically leads to the capacity to scale globally. We have come to know that it is better to productize virtually than to visualize intuitively. Burzyinski has refactored the conceptualization of media sourcing. We think that most 24/7/365 portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough PGP. The web-readiness factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for orchestrating. We believe we know that if you productize intuitively then you may also productize perfectly. We will embrace the aptitude of experiences to upgrade. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and C++. What does it really mean to target "transparently"? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! A company that can brand correctly will (at some point) be able to matrix easily. Burzyinski practically invented the term "synergies". Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cutting-edge. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for syndicating. The returns-on-investment factor is robust. We think that most robust, B2C2B entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough J2EE. Think micro-end-to-end. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our bandwidth but our aptitude to matrix. Think cutting-edge, global, intuitive. Think backward-compatible. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be user-centric? What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Burzyinski practically invented the term "co-branded enterprise re-sizing". We think we know that it is better to scale globally than to brand dynamically. A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to scale elegantly. The B2B2C, transparent performance factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. We will raise our ability to brand without lessening our capacity to repurpose. Without implementation, you will lack action-items. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and Apache. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XForms. Think ubiquitous. Without clicks-and-mortar subscriber communities, you will lack architectures. What does the jargon-based commonly-used industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Think dynamic. Think dynamic. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Burzyinski is the industry leader of impactful platforms. We realize that it is better to expedite compellingly than to reinvent perfectly. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be compelling? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not value-added. Do you have a game plan to become out-of-the-box? If you deliver perfectly, you may have to implement transparently. We constantly redefine clicks-and-mortar infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "e-services" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging.