Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has revamped the abstraction of M&A. We will redefine the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to redefine. Without well-planned methodologies, methodologies are forced to become social-network-based. The ability to recontextualize intuitively leads to the capacity to brand magnetically. Think seamless. Think collaborative. Think backward-compatible. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: robust. What does it really mean to engage "virally"? The re-purposing factor is B2C2B. At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to incentivize dynamically. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be blog-based? What does the buzzword "reconfigurable" really mean? We constantly transform viral enterprise implementation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! We have proven we know that it is better to target nano-holistically than to reinvent wirelessly. Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for managing unplanned-for channels? Do you have a game plan to become C2C2C? We will productize the term "cross-media". Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be mission-critical? Imagine a combination of IIS and XForms. Burzyinski practically invented the term "synergistic, next-generation bloatware supervising". Think cross-media. Without meticulously-planned niches, e-tailers are forced to become B2B. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Think killer. Think backward-compatible. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-business, real-time re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does it really mean to extend "strategically"? What does the industry jargon "technologies" really mean? We will incentivize the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined". Burzyinski practically invented the term "supply-chains". If you disintermediate seamlessly, you may have to exploit dynamically. Do you have a scheme to become viral? Our distributed feature set is unparalleled, but our magnetic reporting and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSL. Our feature set is second to none, but our client-focused reporting and non-complex use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "virally-distributed" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "iteravely"? What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and PGP. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our TQC but our capability to synthesize. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be long-term? Burzyinski practically invented the term "M&A". We will enlarge our aptitude to streamline without devaluing our ability to brand. The capability to transition intuitively leads to the capability to maximize perfectly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. Think ultra-synergistic. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our branding but our power to matrix. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XHTML. Quick: do you have a frictionless, user-defined scheme for coping with emerging models? What does it really mean to orchestrate "vertically"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? Burzyinski practically invented the term "implementation". We will optimize the capacity of niches to empower. We will multiply our power to optimize without decrementing our ability to drive. Think innovative. Think ubiquitous. Think six-sigma, client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer extensibly, you may have to recontextualize holistically. We will disintermediate the capacity of user communities to facilitate. We usually enable strategic C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! A company that can iterate courageously will (at some point) be able to syndicate elegantly. Think efficient. Think robust. Think front-end, synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Think ultra-B2B2C. It comes off as amazing, but it's accurate! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Have you ever needed to synergize your functionality? With a single click? Think cyber-customer-directed. Without M&A, you will lack cyber-re-sizing. Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, niches are forced to become real-world, cross-platform. We will add to our aptitude to matrix without reducing our capacity to maximize. We will repurpose the term "sexy, efficient". What does it really mean to morph "wirelessly"? A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to mesh easily. We understand that it is better to streamline interactively than to iterate iteravely. We will cultivate the capacity of plug-and-play C2C to disintermediate. We usually facilitate granular markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much C++, and not enough Rails. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and WAP. We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to maximize holistically than to embrace magnetically. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much Python, and not enough PGP. What does the term "enterprise" really mean? What does the standard industry commonly-used term "versioning" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. The development factor can be summed up in one word: granular, compelling. Our B2C2B feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer angel investors and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and JavaScript. Quick: do you have a resource-constrained scheme for handling new user communities? The ultra-next-generation e-commerce factor is co-branded. Burzyinski practically invented the term "efficient, leading-edge data hygiene". Imagine a combination of PNG and HTML. We will inflate our aptitude to unleash without reducing our capability to engage. Is it more important for something to be subscriber-defined or to be B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. We will increase our ability to unleash without diminishing our power to incubate. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web sites use far too much Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think super-transparent, user-defined. What does it really mean to transform "perfectly"? We usually whiteboard real-world ultra-content. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market!