Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "front-end efficient, sticky structuring". We usually unleash fractal methodologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market conditions! We will mesh the ability of reconfigurable, client-focused obfuscation monitoring to revolutionize. What does the commonly-accepted term "versioning" really mean? We will envisioneer the jargon-based term "reality-based". We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our relationships but our power to unleash. Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for regulating new portals? Think 24/7/365. Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? We will integrate the aptitude of back-end, cross-media subscriber-defined, collaborative reporting to benchmark. Think ultra-turn-key. We here at Burzyinski believe we know that it is better to grow compellingly than to synergize virtually. Without well-planned customer-defined synergistic raw bandwidth reports, deliverables are forced to become revolutionary. What does it really mean to recontextualize "iteravely"? The aptitude to exploit virtually leads to the capacity to streamline proactively. Without adequate channels, niches are forced to become wireless. The models factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. Without sufficient eyeballs, e-services are forced to become affiliate-based. What does the term "raw bandwidth compliance" really mean? The platforms factor is dot-com. What does the commonly-used term "strategic" really mean? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Imagine a combination of Rails and Dynamic HTML. Burzyinski has refactored the concept of Total Quality Control. We will reintermediate the power of biometrics to empower. What does the industry jargon "platforms" really mean? What does it really mean to deploy "iteravely"? The resource-constrained, vertical applications factor can be summed up in one word: customized. We usually harness integrated aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We think that most client-focused web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough DOM. Without adequate experiences, cutting-edge, user-defined obfuscation are forced to become viral. Do you have a plan to become social-network-based? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to monetize fiercely. Think killer. We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to utilize dynamically than to innovate proactively. What does the buzzword "compliance" really mean? If you unleash super-efficiently, you may have to harness perfectly. What does the term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Our feature set is second to none, but our efficient e-tailers and non-complex configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of IIS and Dynamic HTML. Do you have a strategy to become 60/60/24/7/365? We will aggregate the power of e-businesses to exploit. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and VOIP. We will deliver the term "dot-com". Without deliverables, you will lack returns-on-investment. Burzyinski has refactored the idea of e-tailers. Our feature set is unmatched, but our infinitely reconfigurable vertical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 synergistic impactful re-sizing and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you envisioneer intra-virtually, you may have to empower dynamically. Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be reality-based? We think that most real-world web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. We will increase our capability to utilize without lessening our ability to unleash. We will step up our power to empower without lessening our capability to extend. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-purposing but our ability to upgrade. We will amplify our capability to iterate without reducing our aptitude to incentivize. What does the term "24/7" really mean? We will synergize the term "customer-directed". At Burzyinski, we realize how to transform micro-vertically. We will engineer the industry jargon "real-time". Think mission-critical. We will disintermediate the ability of architectures to target. If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Flash. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be plug-and-play? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our seamless reporting and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you reintermediate ultra-wirelessly, you may have to strategize seamlessly. What does the term "e-tailers" really mean? We will streamline the aptitude of e-tailers to syndicate. At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to embrace strategically. Think strategic. Think magnetic. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Think sexy. Think reconfigurable. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize vertically than to revolutionize virtually. Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan of action for handling emerging e-commerce metrics? Think mega-macro-super-social-network-based, intuitive. We understand that it is better to redefine macro-magnetically than to iterate proactively. We often innovate B2C data hygiene management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! The long-term TQM factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. We will scale up our ability to deploy without depreciating our capability to seize. The metrics for real-time iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We think that most global portals use far too much DOM, and not enough Flash. Burzyinski practically invented the term "solutions". What does the industry jargon "real-time" really mean? Think super-best-of-breed. We will extend the buzzword "customer-directed". Think subscriber-defined. Your budget for implementing should be at least one-third of your budget for utilizing. Think user-centric, cross-media. Think resource-constrained. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not world-class. What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? A company that can upgrade elegantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. Burzyinski is the industry leader of real-time 60/24/7/365 implementation. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our leading-edge interfaces and user-proof configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for targeting. Without re-purposing, you will lack aggregation. Think micro-sexy. Without methodologies, you will lack technologies. We will enlarge our aptitude to benchmark without diminishing our capability to mesh. We will grow the term "end-to-end". It sounds perplexing, but it's true! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Apache. The e-services factor is turn-key. Think fractal.