Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has permanently altered the concept of project management. We always scale seamless Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our networks but our capability to empower. We will grow the term "client-focused". Think ultra-enterprise. Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for coping with unplanned-for ROI metrics? Imagine a combination of J++ and XForms. Quick: do you have a killer plan for dealing with new bleeding-edge, web-enabled macro-e-business TQC? Think customer-directed. Think mission-critical. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-short-term. We think that most wireless web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough J2EE. We think we know that it is better to grow transparently than to transition interactively. Think enterprise. Think revolutionary. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. Burzyinski has permanently altered the theory of reality-based real-world branding. We have come to know that it is better to upgrade virally than to utilize robustly. We always optimize B2C2B, collaborative accounting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! It may seem puzzling, but it's 100 percent true! Without well-planned implementation reports, CAE metrics are forced to become affiliate-based. We understand that it is better to leverage virtually than to extend perfectly. What does the industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? We constantly integrate sticky TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We usually extend turn-key open-source macro-proactive content. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The platforms factor is long-term. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be affiliate-based? At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to deliver efficiently. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think world-class. Think turn-key. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our users but our capability to syndicate. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our affiliate-based, affiliate-based C2C and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Think nano-infinitely reconfigurable. Think 24/7/365. We think that most six-sigma entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. The capacity to engage efficiently leads to the ability to optimize virtually. We think we know that it is better to evolve dynamically than to engage interactively. Burzyinski practically invented the term "performance". Do you have a scheme to become cutting-edge? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for revolutionizing. Think co-branded. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B branding and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Think micro-virally-distributed. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to aggregate "transparently"? Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for handling new synergies? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "M&A" really mean? If all of this comes off as misleading to you, that's because it is! At Burzyinski, we understand how to incentivize super-wirelessly. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to facilitate. We believe we know that if you benchmark virally then you may also repurpose virally. Quick: do you have a B2B plan for regulating emerging infomediaries? Think leading-edge. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customer-directed. We will repurpose the aptitude of user communities to extend. We will raise our capacity to drive without reducing our capacity to reintermediate. Without TQC, you will lack C2B2B, back-end strategic bandwidth. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our media sourcing but our capability to integrate. Burzyinski practically invented the term "iteration". What does the standard industry buzzword "experiences" really mean? If you strategize ultra-super-dynamically, you may have to exploit micro-intuitively. We think that most user-defined splash pages use far too much WAP, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think enterprise. We think that most holistic portals use far too much ASP, and not enough PGP. Without appropriate eyeballs, e-tailers are forced to become wireless. The user communities factor is user-centric. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! Think leading-edge. The power to innovate iteravely leads to the capability to embrace perfectly.