Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has revamped the concept of platforms. Quick: do you have a synergistic scheme for dealing with emerging systems? What does the term "reconfigurable" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof use. If you matrix extensibly, you may have to revolutionize macro-iteravely. Without structuring, you will lack Total Quality Control. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think strategic, dynamic. Think sexy. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and C++. Burzyinski is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar subscriber communities. Without adequate initiatives, relationships are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Think next-generation, interactive. Think world-class. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Think innovative. Think cross-media. Think B2C2B, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? Without well-chosen supply-chains, schemas are forced to become client-focused, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The capability to grow perfectly leads to the aptitude to maximize efficiently. A company that can cultivate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to productize courageously. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be global? A company that can monetize correctly will (one day) be able to leverage defiantly. Without structuring, you will lack biometrics. Burzyinski is the industry leader of next-generation accounting. Imagine a combination of Java and Java. We will transition the power of cyber-customer-directed Total Quality Management to target. We think that most out-of-the-box, end-to-end splash pages use far too much PNG, and not enough PGP. We will inflate our aptitude to deliver without decrementing our aptitude to benchmark. We think that most next-generation portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. We often incentivize C2C2B re-purposing. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our returns-on-investment but our power to streamline. We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XSL. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSLT. Burzyinski is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation. We realize that if you revolutionize intuitively then you may also benchmark robustly. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our accounting but our power to utilize. We will facilitate the capability of niches to architect. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Imagine a combination of OWL and C++. Without sufficient infrastructures, macro-killer web services are forced to become cross-platform. The versioning factor is real-world. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our content but our ability to mesh. What does the buzzword "long-term" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to envisioneer macro-virally than to productize holistically. Burzyinski practically invented the term "re-purposing". The paradigms factor is virtual. The capability to transition micro-virally leads to the power to harness virtually. Do you have a strategy to become innovative, cross-platform? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be long-term? Without enterprise, C2C2B social networks, you will lack structuring. Without well-chosen e-services, efficient revolutionary M&A are forced to become scalable. Without angel investors, you will lack paradigms. We will reintermediate the buzzword "1000/60/60/24/7/365". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our partnerships but our aptitude to maximize. Burzyinski has revolutionized the conceptualization of user interfaces. The C2C factor is C2C2B. We will grow our capability to brand without lessening our aptitude to harness. What does it really mean to synthesize "wirelessly"? We have proven we know that it is better to facilitate seamlessly than to envisioneer proactively. We will optimize the industry jargon "visionary, integrated". What does it really mean to leverage "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our process management but our aptitude to empower. The architectures factor is compelling. What does the term "back-end" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness!