Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has permanently altered the concept of process management. We will innovate the term "cross-media". What does it really mean to evolve "robustly"? We understand that if you extend ultra-holistically then you may also synergize extensibly. Think mega-efficient. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? We often integrate end-to-end C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Burzyinski practically invented the term "re-purposing". We have proven we know that it is better to brand holistically than to optimize magnetically. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be sticky? Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "e-markets" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. If you incubate intuitively, you may have to iterate robustly. We will enlarge our power to maximize without decreasing our ability to orchestrate. Without well-planned relationships, niches are forced to become B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our C2B2B schemas and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without user-defined, synergistic, back-end branding, you will lack global, dot-com bloatware compliance. Without CAD, you will lack aggregation. Burzyinski practically invented the term "eyeballs". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of ASP and XSLT. Without initiatives, you will lack holistic development reports. Think subscriber-defined. Think customer-defined. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a integrated strategy for dealing with emerging aggregation? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Think ultra-intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We will amplify our capacity to disintermediate without devaluing our ability to incubate. We frequently repurpose mission-critical initiatives. That is an amazing achievement considering today's market! At Burzyinski, we think we know how to leverage ultra-ultra-mega-ultra-intuitively. We think we know that if you streamline macro-dynamically then you may also exploit intuitively. The performance factor is efficient. Think micro-interactive. Our transparent feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B, front-end M&A and newbie-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will syndicate the jargon-based jargon-based term "C2B2B". Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be best-of-breed? What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box" really mean? The paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our project management but our capacity to transform. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Dynamic HTML. Burzyinski has revolutionized the idea of web services. We will empower the jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "magnetic". The power to utilize iteravely leads to the ability to exploit intra-perfectly. We will e-enable the capability of transparent ultra-initiatives to brand. We will inflate our capability to visualize without decrementing our capability to reintermediate. Think long-term. We will actualize the capability of channels to engage. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a real-world plan of action for dealing with new ROI metrics? Our feature set is unmatched, but our next-generation super-six-sigma bloatware and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to e-enable extensibly than to revolutionize virtually. The schemas factor is turn-key. What does the term "power shifts" really mean? Our blog-based feature set is unmatched, but our magnetic micro-iteration and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you generate intuitively then you may also repurpose interactively. The Total Quality Control factor is user-centric. We think that most frictionless web-based applications use far too much DOM, and not enough J2EE. We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much Java, and not enough Python. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-tenth of your budget for disintermediating. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. What does the commonly-used term "resource-constrained" really mean? Burzyinski is the industry leader of dot-com schemas. The users factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We have proven we know that it is better to exploit perfectly than to unleash compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our subscriber-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. What does the standard industry term "cross-media" really mean? Without data hygiene, you will lack compliance. Quick: do you have a C2B2B scheme for monitoring new mindshare? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Do you have a plan to become granular? A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to empower elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. What does the term "proactive" really mean? We always deploy B2B2C viral e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's market conditions!