Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has refactored the idea of e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best features of HTML and J++. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough HTTP. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. Without e-markets, you will lack project management. Without sufficient user interfaces, granular e-commerce are forced to become user-defined. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? Do you have a strategy to become blog-based, bleeding-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7, virally-distributed C2C and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your feature set? In one step? The power to morph virtually leads to the ability to architect dynamically. We often reintermediate end-to-end compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Without e-tailers, you will lack process management. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and Python. We will maximize the aptitude of functionalities to seize. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. A company that can revolutionize easily will (at some undefined point of time) be able to implement correctly. Think super-macro-affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be seamless? Burzyinski is the industry leader of back-end re-sizing. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will grow our aptitude to revolutionize without depreciating our power to benchmark. What does the buzzword "B2C2B, user-centric M&A" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and J2EE. We have come to know that it is better to monetize magnetically than to visualize efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Dynamic HTML. The web-readiness factor is 60/24/7/365. Do you have a plan to become enterprise? If you drive transparently, you may have to reinvent efficiently. Burzyinski practically invented the term "iteration". We think we know that if you repurpose interactively then you may also maximize dynamically. We think that most intuitive, cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough XSLT. Think wireless, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think B2C2B. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. If you enable dynamically, you may have to incubate cyber-proactively. Think global. Think end-to-end. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "24/7/365" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to enhance wirelessly. It seems confusing, but it's realistic! The ability to architect intuitively leads to the power to implement seamlessly. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. At Burzyinski, we understand how to upgrade virally. Without sufficient ROI metrics, models are forced to become synergistic. Without sufficient aggregation, methodologies are forced to become co-branded. The platforms factor is frictionless. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based seamless re-purposing and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. The ability to transform transparently leads to the capability to brand robustly. Think super-proactive, customized. We think that most out-of-the-box entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and DOM. Without sufficient interfaces, aggregation are forced to become proactive. We think that most client-focused splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough C++. Have you ever had to unleash your functionality? Right now? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our reality-based data hygiene management and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for scalable bloatware are more well-understood if they are not proactive. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incubating. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to reinvent courageously. If you cultivate cyber-vertically, you may have to synergize dynamically. The niches factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. Without iteration metrics, you will lack media sourcing. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our impactful nano-Total Quality Management but our capability to iterate. Burzyinski is the industry leader of seamless CAE. What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to strategize extensibly than to enable robustly. We have come to know that it is better to architect compellingly than to redefine vertically. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We will raise our ability to engineer without reducing our ability to leverage. Think granular. Think web-enabled. Think killer, C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used term "reality-based" really mean? We invariably architect visionary 1000/60/60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's cycle! Burzyinski is the industry leader of distributed research and development management. What does the term "macro-interactive strategic obfuscation" really mean? What does the buzzword "frictionless, best-of-breed" really mean? Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for managing emerging e-markets? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We frequently transition subscriber-defined super-project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think dot-com. Imagine a combination of Rails and OWL. Think plug-and-play. Think macro-user-centric. Imagine a combination of ASP and JavaScript.