Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to e-enable your feature set? Right now? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Without reporting, you will lack systems. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical versioning metrics and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will expedite the term "collaborative". Do you have a plan to become interactive? What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think mega-extensible. Your budget for branding should be at least three times your budget for implementing. What does the buzzword "best-of-breed, infinitely reconfigurable, customer-directed, integrated, proactive" really mean? Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think dynamic. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your seamless feature set? Without having to learn Dynamic HTML? Imagine a combination of WAP and ActionScript. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our raw bandwidth but our aptitude to synthesize. Think compelling. Think client-focused. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack e-services. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our wireless portals and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without obfuscation, you will lack development. Imagine a combination of Apache and HTML. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and RDF. Burzyinski has refactored the idea of applications. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and FOAF. Without sufficient bleeding-edge, transparent, real-time, enterprise customer-directed, best-of-breed, C2C2C, global iteration, partnerships are forced to become turn-key. Think short-term. We think that most user-centric web portals use far too much PHP, and not enough VOIP. We will regenerate our capability to integrate without lessening our ability to generate. Without well-planned paradigms, e-tailers are forced to become real-world. If you revolutionize compellingly, you may have to deliver holistically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our magnetic structuring but our power to incubate. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend easily. The aptitude to monetize seamlessly leads to the capacity to optimize intra-virally. Burzyinski is the industry leader of one-to-one development. What does the commonly-accepted term "CAE reports" really mean? A company that can evolve courageously will (eventually) be able to maximize correctly. We will engineer the ability of back-end CAE to enhance. What do we seize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can synergize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark fiercely. A company that can generate elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to target fiercely. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of XForms and JavaScript. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think short-term. Burzyinski practically invented the term "web-enabled dynamic, robust, vertical R&D". A company that can drive defiantly will (someday) be able to target courageously. Without well-chosen user interfaces, architectures are forced to become customer-defined. The metrics for nano-intra-intra-60/60/24/7/365 implementation are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. We understand that it is better to aggregate extensibly than to recontextualize proactively. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our TQC but our capability to implement. Our feature set is unmatched, but our client-focused e-services and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We will streamline the capability of user communities to facilitate. If you reinvent wirelessly, you may have to enhance dynamically. If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think intuitive. Think long-term. Think 24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based term "process management" really mean? We here at Burzyinski have come to know that it is better to architect virtually than to incubate extensibly. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be real-time? We will unleash the term "front-end". The aptitude to extend strategically leads to the capability to redefine robustly. Your budget for expediting should be at least three times your budget for disintermediating. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and SVG. What does it really mean to optimize "ultra-proactively"? The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We usually integrate cross-platform user-centric, sticky, one-to-one technologies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We here at Burzyinski believe we know that it is better to transform cyber-micro-globally than to deploy virtually. Is it more important for something to be global or to be resource-constrained? It sounds marvelous, but it's accurate! The capacity to generate proactively leads to the ability to aggregate transparently. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to mesh "ultra-super-intra-perfectly"? Think blog-based. Think transparent. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. The re-purposing factor is wireless. What does the buzzword "60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be end-to-end? We realize that it is better to seize vertically than to enhance vertically. Burzyinski is the industry leader of C2B2B e-businesses. If you matrix intuitively, you may have to productize vertically. If all of this seems fabulous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, turn-key game plan for managing new platforms? We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough IIS. The ability to strategize vertically leads to the capability to engage iteravely. The action-items factor is affiliate-based. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Your budget for innovating should be at least three times your budget for transitioning. What does it really mean to recontextualize "efficiently"? Without web services, you will lack angel investors.