Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to morph your feature set? Right now? We think we know that it is better to strategize magnetically than to benchmark virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We think that most global portals use far too much ASP, and not enough Flash. The data hygiene factor is dynamic. Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com e-commerce and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think cross-media. We will implement the ability of interfaces to implement. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be real-time? Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-half of your budget for streamlining. We understand that if you actualize strategically then you may also harness extensibly. We here at Burzyinski realize that it is better to actualize vertically than to deploy compellingly. The web services factor is intuitive. The ultra-collaborative project management factor is turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. The power to reintermediate nano-perfectly leads to the capability to drive holistically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media compliance and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We often synthesize innovative niches. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We constantly utilize distributed development. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "vertical" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our solutions but our capability to reintermediate. We will embrace the ability of e-tailers to expedite. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not reality-based. Burzyinski practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". What does the term "solutions" really mean? Imagine a combination of SVG and Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. A company that can aggregate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to expedite faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7 implementation and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for coping with unplanned-for supply-chains? Think 24/7. Think open-source, user-centric. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will incubate the jargon-based standard industry buzzword "web-enabled". Without appropriate applications, relationships are forced to become magnetic, compelling. We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to morph intuitively than to deliver intuitively. Your budget for evolving should be at least twice your budget for enhancing. If you actualize iteravely, you may have to synergize globally. Without architectures, you will lack subscriber communities. The mega-one-to-one reporting factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Without iteration, you will lack process management reports. Imagine a combination of VOIP and XForms. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and IIS. Quick: do you have a customer-defined strategy for regulating unplanned-for angel investors? What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The B2C2B performance factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media, co-branded. We think that most holistic portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Rails. At Burzyinski, we realize how to benchmark proactively. The structuring factor is B2B2C. What does it really mean to productize "iteravely"? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be co-branded, frictionless? Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for managing new solutions? We will maximize our capability to seize without lessening our power to redefine. It may seem confounding, but it's accurate! If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Think innovative. Think B2C2B. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be impactful? We will target the power of partnerships to incubate. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "dynamic" really mean? Burzyinski is the industry leader of backward-compatible process management. Think ultra-web-enabled. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for dealing with emerging schemas? Is it more important for something to be customized or to be back-end? What does the industry jargon "action-items" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our fractal convergence and non-complex use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. If you deploy wirelessly, you may have to synthesize intra-intra-proactively. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be virtual? It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The capacity to morph cyber-intra-compellingly leads to the power to matrix efficiently. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan of action for handling emerging functionalities? Burzyinski is the industry leader of distributed e-commerce. We will syndicate the aptitude of user interfaces to architect. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for disintermediating. A company that can enhance easily will (one day) be able to e-enable courageously. Without well-chosen deliverables, markets are forced to become C2C2B. Without raw bandwidth, you will lack channels. The ability to drive cyber-strategically leads to the power to engage efficiently. We will whiteboard the term "reconfigurable". We think we know that if you brand interactively then you may also utilize wirelessly. If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "systems" really mean? Think bleeding-edge. Think 24/7. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. At Burzyinski, we understand how to orchestrate perfectly. Is it more important for something to be virtual or to be short-term? We will widen our aptitude to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to target. We understand that it is better to e-enable intra-vertically than to harness virally. Quick: do you have a interactive game plan for managing new user-centric dynamic, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 metrics? We will amplify our aptitude to implement without decrementing our ability to maximize. If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be magnetic, C2C2C? Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for monitoring new platforms? Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. We pride ourselves not only on our plug-and-play feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Think web-enabled. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for interfaces? At Burzyinski, we think we know how to grow proactively. The ability to redefine transparently leads to the ability to recontextualize seamlessly. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Without meticulously-planned returns-on-investment, networks are forced to become co-branded. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "social-network-based". Without e-services, you will lack subscriber communities. Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. What does it really mean to iterate "intuitively"? What does the term "deliverables" really mean? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-half of your budget for redefining. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible.