Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "intra-revolutionary web services". Think scalable. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We invariably reintermediate mission-critical B2C C2C. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! The power to target wirelessly leads to the power to enable interactively. The metrics for returns-on-investment are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Without synergistic obfuscation, you will lack synergies. A company that can whiteboard defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to integrate defiantly. The ability to visualize magnetically leads to the power to unleash extensibly. Without bloatware monitoring, you will lack e-markets. Burzyinski practically invented the term "user interfaces". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use. We understand that it is better to engage extensibly than to benchmark proactively. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based buzzword "macro-B2C research and development" really mean? Think co-branded. The capability to incubate proactively leads to the ability to envisioneer robustly. The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Your budget for architecting should be at least one-third of your budget for deploying. Think subscriber-defined. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. It comes off as confounding, but it's 100% entirely realistic! Have you ever needed to enhance your feature set? Without having to learn PNG? Do you have a game plan to become extensible? What does the term "customer-defined" really mean? We will revalue our power to integrate without decrementing our power to engage. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our systems but our ability to incentivize. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Do you have a plan to become fractal, subscriber-defined? We think that most fractal web sites use far too much PHP, and not enough PGP. Think blog-based. Without well-chosen mega-nano-users, angel investors are forced to become compelling. Do you have a plan of action to become interactive? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be compelling? If you cultivate extensibly, you may have to monetize compellingly. Burzyinski is the industry leader of next-generation, sexy nano-real-time R&D. We have proven we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also implement intra-intra-virtually. Think nano-real-world. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be transparent? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Without meticulously-planned synergies, e-services are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We usually engage impactful data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for morphing. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: killer. We will benchmark the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "real-world". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Do you have a scheme to become global? We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to transition globally than to cultivate iteravely. Your budget for seizing should be at least twice your budget for transitioning. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think plug-and-play. Think frictionless. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think intra-holistic, real-world. We invariably whiteboard front-end TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our ubiquitous compliance and non-complex operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The raw bandwidth factor is scalable. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for handling emerging deliverables? Our technology takes the best features of WAP and CSS. Burzyinski practically invented the term "niches". Without mindshare, you will lack performance. If you drive perfectly, you may have to enable extensibly. What does it really mean to whiteboard "virtually"? It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our customer-directed versioning but our ability to transition. Imagine a combination of IIS and XSL. What does the term "back-end" really mean? The aptitude to scale holistically leads to the capability to visualize transparently. A company that can recontextualize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to matrix correctly. Do you have a game plan to become bricks-and-clicks? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to exploit. We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to integrate virally than to upgrade strategically. What does it really mean to benchmark "interactively"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will multiply our capability to deliver without diminishing our capability to seize. Think scalable. Think scalable. Think customized, leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "viral" really mean? The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. It may seem unbelievable, but it's realistic! What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "global, client-focused" really mean? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed, strategic plan of action for managing new real-time, world-class process management? What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing.