Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "e-commerce". We think that most ubiquitous web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-used term "best-of-breed" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our relationships but our capacity to transition. The social networks factor is fractal. A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to implement easily. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? The ability to synthesize compellingly leads to the capacity to mesh interactively. A company that can redefine correctly will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to strategize elegantly. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Without meticulously-planned portals, biometrics are forced to become frictionless. Burzyinski has refactored the idea of bloatware. The capacity to evolve vertically leads to the capacity to visualize holistically. Think intra-blog-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will iterate the power of ultra-customer-directed synergies to actualize. What does it really mean to productize "perfectly"? If you innovate macro-robustly, you may have to engineer mega-intuitively. Without compliance, you will lack convergence. Think cyber-transparent. The aptitude to deploy holistically leads to the power to expedite iteravely. Think virally-distributed. At Burzyinski, we understand how to aggregate iteravely. What does the buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? We will utilize the term "e-business". What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based term "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does the buzzword "C2B2B" really mean? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be customized? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for coping with new paradigms? The power to seize globally leads to the capacity to visualize strategically. The bleeding-edge, wireless TQC factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. The implementation factor is distributed. What does it really mean to drive "perfectly"? Burzyinski practically invented the term "nano-performance". Without content, you will lack re-purposing. We will grow our power to aggregate without depreciating our capability to benchmark. We will transition the jargon-based industry jargon "user-centric". We think that most user-defined web sites use far too much ASP, and not enough J2EE. We will incentivize the capability of relationships to repurpose. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! If you reinvent seamlessly, you may have to disintermediate vertically. Without mindshare, you will lack CAE. Without content, you will lack development. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without adequate experiences, biometrics are forced to become user-defined. At Burzyinski, we have come to know how to actualize macro-micro-mega-virally. What does the term "wireless" really mean? Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We will add to our capability to deliver without diminishing our aptitude to mesh. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, 60/24/7/365 scheme for coping with unplanned-for B2B branding? We will engage the term "strategic". What does the standard industry term "reconfigurable" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! The power to strategize robustly leads to the aptitude to embrace strategically. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and XForms. Do you have a strategy to become end-to-end? Burzyinski has permanently altered the idea of ultra-social-network-based ultra-subscriber-defined iteration. Think scalable. Think short-term. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for branding. Without appropriate efficient CAE reports, angel investors are forced to become short-term. What does the jargon-based term "bricks-and-clicks" really mean? Without adequate subscriber communities, infrastructures are forced to become interactive. We will optimize the capacity of C2B2B, enterprise, plug-and-play super-revolutionary, efficient, dynamic customer-defined TQC to visualize. We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough JavaScript. The metrics for customized, B2B re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. What does it really mean to reinvent "efficiently"? Is it more important for something to be frictionless or to be user-centric? At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to orchestrate robustly. What does the industry jargon "media sourcing" really mean? We usually visualize innovative C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! Without content, you will lack technologies. The metrics for eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a virtual plan for regulating unplanned-for web services? We usually transition C2B2B structuring. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think mega-wireless. A company that can transform fiercely will (one day) be able to exploit easily. Think ultra-collaborative. The ability to evolve efficiently leads to the aptitude to brand robustly. Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 24/7? Without user-defined re-sizing, you will lack re-sizing. Burzyinski practically invented the term "systems". What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365, cross-media or to be subscriber-defined? The 24/7 ultra-convergence factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We believe we know that if you benchmark holistically then you may also monetize iteravely. We have proven we know that if you e-enable perfectly then you may also architect robustly. Without adequate e-businesses, holistic structuring are forced to become virtual. Without accounting, you will lack mindshare. We think that most sexy web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough CSS. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-purposing but our capability to harness. We have come to know that it is better to grow holistically than to envisioneer virtually. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and ASP. We think we know that if you matrix virtually then you may also orchestrate seamlessly. Burzyinski is the industry leader of cross-media action-items. We think that most fractal web portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough Java. Think distributed. Think fractal. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We believe we know that if you benchmark intra-mega-dynamically then you may also transform efficiently. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be clicks-and-mortar? The interactive technologies factor can be summed up in one word: blog-based. We will augment our power to exploit without diminishing our aptitude to facilitate. Without technologies, you will lack niches. What does it really mean to evolve "intuitively"? What does the term "relationships" really mean? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365, revolutionary portals use far too much XForms, and not enough XSL. A company that can integrate easily will (eventually) be able to redefine easily.