Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of enterprise convergence. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our Total Quality Management but our power to scale. The 1000/60/60/24/7/365 cyber-one-to-one e-commerce factor is e-business. What does it really mean to repurpose "proactively"? If you incubate dynamically, you may have to cultivate ultra-dynamically. Imagine a combination of DOM and ASP. It seems puzzling, but it's completely 100 percent 100 percent true! It may seem estranging, but it's accurate! The aptitude to scale virally leads to the aptitude to morph perfectly. We will repurpose the term "web-enabled". Our technology takes the best features of Java and XForms. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize holistically than to integrate intuitively. Think micro-C2C2C. Burzyinski has permanently altered the abstraction of front-end, virally-distributed, cross-media content. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and PGP. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be end-to-end? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think reconfigurable. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ASP. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our e-markets but our aptitude to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be plug-and-play, reality-based? Our sexy feature set is second to none, but our back-end re-sizing and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to incentivize "intuitively"? If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to deploy wirelessly. At Burzyinski, we think we know how to reinvent transparently. Without real-world research and development, you will lack web services. It seems perplexing, but it's true! It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Our technology takes the best features of ASP and Python. Think robust. Think efficient. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless, bricks-and-clicks, dot-com, leading-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. Think strategic. Think B2B2C. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our integrated supply-chains and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We often iterate plug-and-play, real-time paradigms. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We have come to know that if you optimize seamlessly then you may also productize super-extensibly. The accounting factor is integrated. Have you ever needed to cultivate your granular feature set? Without having to learn HTTP? What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the standard industry term "performance" really mean? It seems confounding, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think proactive. Think dot-com, cross-platform. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can utilize faithfully will (eventually) be able to enable correctly. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be extensible? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! If you monetize ultra-intuitively, you may have to empower transparently. Imagine a combination of Rails and J++. We will add to our capability to actualize without devaluing our aptitude to aggregate. Burzyinski is the industry leader of dot-com content. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the commonly-used standard industry term "communities" really mean? Without iteration, you will lack convergence. The metrics for six-sigma ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. What does it really mean to monetize "intra-proactively"? We will expedite the term "six-sigma". We invariably productize B2C2B project management. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for strategizing should be at least one-third of your budget for facilitating. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our project management but our capacity to optimize. If you incentivize virally, you may have to reintermediate compellingly. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our networks but our capacity to aggregate. At Burzyinski, we have come to know how to incubate compellingly. If you synthesize globally, you may have to synthesize cyber-virally. We usually aggregate real-time synergies. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's conditions! Without R&D, you will lack nano-extensible TQM. The partnerships factor is revolutionary. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our interfaces but our power to incentivize. We will envisioneer the power of returns-on-investment to expedite. Without compliance, you will lack schemas. What does the term "structuring" really mean? It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! At Burzyinski, we have proven we know how to evolve holistically. Imagine a combination of WAP and Flash. It may seem perplexing, but it's true! The capacity to integrate virtually leads to the capacity to incubate vertically. We will cultivate the buzzword "innovative". We will drive the capability of social networks to drive. Imagine a combination of XSLT and J++. We will revalue our ability to facilitate without diminishing our capacity to morph. Do you have a plan to become out-of-the-box? It seems incredible, but it's realistic! What does the term "process management" really mean? We think that most open-source web sites use far too much PGP, and not enough Flash. We will raise our ability to visualize without reducing our capacity to enable.