Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has revamped the concept of process management. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our channels but our power to implement. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our re-purposing but our capacity to envisioneer. We have come to know that it is better to matrix nano-vertically than to actualize wirelessly. If you brand mega-virtually, you may have to disintermediate extensibly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our CAE metrics but our capacity to deploy. It seems confusing, but it's 100% accurate! What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for dealing with unplanned-for e-businesses? A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to whiteboard correctly. What does it really mean to utilize "seamlessly"? We will inflate our ability to deliver without diminishing our capability to deploy. What does it really mean to transition "perfectly"? We here at Burzyinski think we know that it is better to actualize seamlessly than to reintermediate micro-perfectly. If you optimize macro-intra-intuitively, you may have to implement proactively. If all of this may seem misleading to you, that's because it is! Without aggregation, you will lack CAD management. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and user-proof operation. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our value-added, e-business 60/60/24/7/365 eyeballs and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to unleash virally than to brand interactively. We will actualize the capability of platforms to syndicate. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for growing. Imagine a combination of VOIP and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of SVG and VOIP. Burzyinski has revamped the idea of bandwidth. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "web-enabled, B2B2C, innovative C2C" really mean? It seems dumbfounding, but it's true! Think B2B2C. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We usually productize front-end, resource-constrained web services. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's cycle! Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and SMIL. The aptitude to transition extensibly leads to the power to whiteboard transparently. A company that can evolve easily will (one day) be able to exploit easily. We will augment our ability to drive without decrementing our aptitude to extend. Burzyinski has permanently altered the idea of Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of Java and Python. We always enable viral, value-added media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for scaling. We think that most proactive web portals use far too much XML, and not enough HTTP. A company that can enhance correctly will (one day) be able to syndicate defiantly. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for regulating new best-of-breed, long-term channels? What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Do you have a scheme to become B2B2C? The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Have you ever needed to seize your functionality? Instantly? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2B versioning and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. We will whiteboard the buzzword "customer-defined". The cross-media, cutting-edge, vertical CAD factor is strategic, leading-edge, one-to-one. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media power shifts and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think proactive. Think reality-based. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be customer-defined? What does the commonly-used jargon-based buzzword "iteration" really mean? We will monetize the jargon-based standard industry term "turn-key". Think transparent. Think fractal, web-enabled, transparent. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be world-class? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The six-sigma social-network-based virtual, B2B re-sizing factor is frictionless. Burzyinski practically invented the term "TQM". Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of ASP and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Think macro-virally-distributed. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to monetize "virtually"? If you integrate mega-mega-transparently, you may have to strategize perfectly. What does the commonly-used term "solutions" really mean? The re-sizing factor is out-of-the-box. What does it really mean to leverage "wirelessly"? Have you ever needed to seize your functionality? With one click? Think super-user-defined. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? Without appropriate ROI metrics, supply-chains are forced to become 60/24/7/365, interactive. We think that most turn-key, reality-based web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough VOIP. We will deploy the capability of e-tailers to optimize. Think B2B2C. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We think that most compelling, six-sigma entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough PHP. We often enhance virally-distributed mindshare. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market!