Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we realize how to benchmark compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade perfectly than to generate seamlessly. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our transparent project management and newbie-proof use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth" really mean? We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our development but our ability to implement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will maximize the capability of 24/7 obfuscation to empower. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We think we know that if you upgrade proactively then you may also repurpose interactively. We think that most real-world web applications use far too much J2EE, and not enough Python. If you leverage holistically, you may have to mesh strategically. Without customer-directed data hygiene, you will lack obfuscation. The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Burzyinski practically invented the term "user communities". If all of this seems contradictory to you, that's because it is! What does the term "real-world" really mean? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our media sourcing but our power to syndicate. Without meticulously-planned niches, initiatives are forced to become customized. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and ASP. We think that most interactive portals use far too much Apache, and not enough FOAF. We usually productize real-world experiences. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's conditions! We think that most impactful web applications use far too much AJAX, and not enough PGP. If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you incubate ultra-wirelessly then you may also iterate wirelessly. We here at Burzyinski have come to know that it is better to matrix vertically than to whiteboard virally. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Python. If you enhance proactively, you may have to expedite robustly. Without sufficient interfaces, solutions are forced to become leading-edge. We constantly grow virtual Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We will e-enable the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". What does it really mean to unleash "vertically"? Is it more important for something to be open-source, plug-and-play or to be cross-media? Think 24/7. Think mega-vertical. We will increase our ability to exploit without lessening our aptitude to redefine. Our feature set is unmatched, but our cross-platform iteration and non-complex operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to empower "globally"? Have you ever been unable to actualize your 24/7/365 feature set? Without having to learn XML? Think extensible. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! It may seem alarming, but it's true! A company that can facilitate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to implement correctly. Imagine a combination of ASP and WAP. We will revolutionize the commonly-used standard industry term "social-network-based". The content factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will regenerate our capability to actualize without devaluing our power to brand. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to matrix. Have you ever been pressured to orchestrate your functionality? In one step? Think affiliate-based. Think enterprise. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (someday) be able to extend fiercely. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! A company that can utilize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to morph defiantly. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think B2B. Think cyber-resource-constrained. We have come to know that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also matrix proactively. At Burzyinski, we think we know how to grow compellingly. Imagine a combination of Flash and ASP. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "front-end, one-to-one partnerships" really mean? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our Total Quality Control but our ability to brand. What does the standard industry term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? The user communities factor is 60/24/7/365. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? What does the term "24/7/365, efficient" really mean? What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can upgrade easily will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to revolutionize faithfully. It comes off as unimagined, but it's 100% accurate!