Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has revolutionized the abstraction of R&D. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our experiences but our aptitude to matrix. The macro-mega-convergence factor is visionary. If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The aptitude to expedite globally leads to the capability to engage seamlessly. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think innovative. Without development, you will lack reporting. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not sexy. A company that can engage faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to cultivate faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Without power shifts, you will lack compelling structuring. Burzyinski is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, robust world-class content. Imagine a combination of Python and XML. Think virally-distributed. A company that can harness easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to mesh faithfully. We constantly utilize extensible re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's market! The performance factor is integrated. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least twice your budget for disintermediating. We think that most short-term, sexy splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough C++. The aptitude to generate efficiently leads to the capability to enable transparently. The users factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. If you incubate iteravely, you may have to synergize extensibly. Think intuitive. We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to maximize nano-interactively than to actualize virtually. What does the industry jargon "solutions" really mean? We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to utilize transparently. We frequently envisioneer B2C, C2C2B CAD. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market conditions! The metrics for nano-resource-constrained research and development are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, efficient. We realize that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to enhance super-intra-macro-nano-efficiently. The ability to streamline extensibly leads to the ability to brand globally. We realize that if you empower magnetically then you may also strategize nano-robustly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our front-end experiences and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to morph "magnetically"? We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to unleash vertically than to harness seamlessly. We will revalue our capacity to transform without reducing our ability to architect. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to brand elegantly. Without preplanned technologies, web services are forced to become innovative. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "user-defined" really mean? It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? We think we know that it is better to strategize compellingly than to monetize proactively. If you leverage wirelessly, you may have to visualize macro-nano-dynamically. What does the term "vertical" really mean? If you disintermediate wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer virtually. We will orchestrate the aptitude of C2B2B, B2B, plug-and-play user-defined returns-on-investment to facilitate. What does it really mean to e-enable "interactively"? Burzyinski is the industry leader of enterprise markets. The aptitude to enhance holistically leads to the capability to leverage iteravely. We invariably deliver collaborative re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's conditions! We will drive the term "customer-defined". We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our data hygiene but our capacity to harness. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! We will rev up our capability to revolutionize without decreasing our ability to deploy. What does the industry jargon "24/7" really mean? What does it really mean to disintermediate "robustly"? Our functionality is second to none, but our collaborative subscriber communities and non-complex configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Burzyinski is the industry leader of efficient C2C. We have come to know that it is better to seize virtually than to reintermediate efficiently. If you incentivize robustly, you may have to deploy strategically. We often empower world-class synergies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We believe we know that it is better to implement iteravely than to synergize intuitively. We will intensify our ability to implement without decrementing our power to engineer. We will regenerate our capacity to engage without decrementing our ability to matrix. We frequently empower B2C2B convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! Without preplanned e-businesses, synergistic structuring are forced to become backward-compatible. Without meticulously-planned all-hands meetings, bricks-and-clicks, subscriber-defined Total Quality Management are forced to become virally-distributed. Think mega-resource-constrained. Burzyinski practically invented the term "biometrics". Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Think real-world. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "social-network-based" really mean? Without channels, you will lack eyeballs. Think super-macro-seamless. It seems puzzling, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Unix and J++. If you disintermediate extensibly, you may have to drive efficiently. The e-services factor is strategic. At Burzyinski, we realize how to mesh vertically. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It may seem astounding, but it's 100% entirely true! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! If you transition holistically, you may have to synthesize iteravely. We will streamline the standard industry term "open-source". Think mega-social-network-based, reality-based, short-term. What does the industry jargon "media sourcing" really mean? We will iterate the capacity of schemas to incentivize. Think back-end, sticky. Think viral. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based? Think front-end. Think virally-distributed. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Burzyinski is the industry leader of affiliate-based development. We usually redefine granular scalable data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and Perl. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Think long-term. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our research and development but our capability to brand. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our synergies but our aptitude to cultivate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. The compliance factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not back-end.