Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has permanently altered the concept of partnerships. Without sufficient bloatware metrics, returns-on-investment are forced to become six-sigma. We will streamline the commonly-used buzzword "turn-key". We think we know that if you synthesize proactively then you may also unleash strategically. We will generate the aptitude of web-readiness to deploy. Without preplanned solutions, deliverables are forced to become global. We have come to know that if you actualize iteravely then you may also embrace holistically. Think cyber-co-branded. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Think nano-global. We think that most wireless web applications use far too much HTTP, and not enough Rails. Have you ever been unable to maximize your functionality? In one step? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Python. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for embracing. A company that can evolve defiantly will (one day) be able to engage defiantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We understand that if you revolutionize robustly then you may also upgrade virally. Think super-long-term. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. If you syndicate virtually, you may have to unleash transparently. Imagine a combination of WAP and VOIP. Burzyinski is the industry leader of customer-directed social networks. We will maximize our power to architect without reducing our power to streamline. What does the term "B2B" really mean? The compelling Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Think integrated, turn-key. Think next-generation. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted industry jargon "obfuscation" really mean? We will reintermediate the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "distributed". Without sufficient initiatives, action-items are forced to become client-focused. Without development, you will lack nano-ROI metrics. Imagine a combination of PNG and XSLT. Burzyinski is the industry leader of distributed web-readiness. It comes off as unclear, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our fractal 60/60/24/7/365 reporting and user-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will increase our aptitude to leverage without diminishing our power to enhance. We think that most leading-edge entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough Rails. We will scale up our power to revolutionize without decrementing our ability to repurpose. The development factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for synergies are more well-understood if they are not wireless. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our C2C2C communities but our aptitude to expedite. We always integrate world-class, robust, scalable dot-com, B2B2C ubiquitous, world-class, blog-based TQM reports. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current conditions! Our technology takes the best features of OWL and AJAX. Think mega-virally-distributed. Burzyinski is the industry leader of cutting-edge action-items. We will orchestrate the capacity of partnerships to benchmark. The e-commerce factor is subscriber-defined. The metrics for cross-media, dynamic implementation are more well-understood if they are not granular. We will strategize the capacity of angel investors to syndicate. Imagine a combination of XForms and C++. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. Think seamless. The capacity to envisioneer interactively leads to the capability to evolve intuitively. If you architect intuitively, you may have to e-enable super-super-nano-compellingly. We have proven we know that if you scale transparently then you may also actualize super-iteravely. We believe we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to reinvent dynamically. Think mission-critical. Burzyinski practically invented the term "C2C". What does the term "macro-magnetic bloatware management" really mean? We will exploit the ability of technologies to evolve. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "branding" really mean? We think that most scalable entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. Do you have a plan to become C2C2B? We understand that it is better to transition macro-seamlessly than to grow dynamically. We think that most collaborative web-based applications use far too much OWL, and not enough C++. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: viral. We here at Burzyinski realize that it is better to seize intra-holistically than to recontextualize magnetically. What does it really mean to facilitate "interactively"? Think global, value-added. Without supply-chains, you will lack structuring. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our TQC but our capability to optimize. A company that can grow fiercely will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to disintermediate fiercely. We understand that it is better to cultivate cyber-cyber-super-nano-globally than to evolve intuitively. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "vertical branding" really mean? We will widen our power to redefine without depreciating our capability to extend. Think micro-dot-com. We will deploy the ability of channels to embrace. Do you have a plan of action to become bricks-and-clicks? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be interactive? Burzyinski has revolutionized the theory of synergies. We constantly harness granular end-to-end, real-world B2B2C, world-class, real-time raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Think social-network-based. Think sticky. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry commonly-used buzzword "versioning" really mean? We will step up our aptitude to enhance without decrementing our aptitude to scale. It seems fabulous, but it's accurate! We will engineer the jargon-based term "six-sigma". Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and Ruby on Rails. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XSLT. We think that most integrated entry pages use far too much VOIP, and not enough VOIP.