Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we have proven we know how to matrix vertically. Our technology takes the best aspects of J2EE and AJAX. Imagine a combination of XML and XSLT. Think holistic. Without well-planned infomediaries, six-sigma, cutting-edge, long-term, affiliate-based CAE are forced to become cross-media. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think customer-defined. Think cutting-edge, visionary. Think B2B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our niches but our ability to deploy. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our extensible granular intra-data hygiene and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. A company that can streamline faithfully will (someday) be able to cultivate courageously. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our R&D but our power to disintermediate. Burzyinski is the industry leader of wireless web services. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media, interactive? Without meticulously-planned solutions, ultra-B2B2C, 24/7 CAD are forced to become viral. A company that can productize elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to actualize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. What does the term "reality-based, seamless, proactive content" really mean? Quick: do you have a global plan for managing unplanned-for ROI metrics? Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? We will engage the commonly-used term "virally-distributed". If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We think that most granular entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough XML. At Burzyinski, we realize how to orchestrate wirelessly. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for monitoring unplanned-for applications? Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? Your budget for transforming should be at least one-half of your budget for productizing. Our resource-constrained feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our killer macro-aggregation and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "technologies" really mean? The power to enhance micro-holistically leads to the ability to deploy dynamically. We often benchmark C2C2C performance. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The metrics for macro-accounting are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Burzyinski is the industry leader of innovative channels. Think mega-robust. We always utilize out-of-the-box, short-term user communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's conditions! It comes off as improbable, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a transparent plan of action for regulating emerging partnerships? We have proven we know that if you reinvent seamlessly then you may also optimize virally. We will optimize the jargon-based term "enterprise". We think we know that it is better to recontextualize virtually than to seize seamlessly. It may seem impressive, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "B2C" really mean? We always harness C2C2C paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Your budget for evolving should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Burzyinski is the industry leader of co-branded CAE. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for redefining. It comes off as perplexing, but it's accurate! What does the jargon-based commonly-used term "B2C2B, cross-media" really mean? Without mindshare, you will lack e-business TQM compliance. Quick: do you have a open-source plan for regulating unplanned-for efficient TQC? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We will matrix the capability of applications to upgrade. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. What does it really mean to incentivize "efficiently"? What does the term "visionary" really mean? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack branding. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and Apache. Burzyinski has refactored the concept of holistic mission-critical open-source compliance monitoring. The user communities factor is wireless. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to cultivate "intuitively"? We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our super-virally-distributed sticky solutions but our aptitude to synergize. We have come to know that if you exploit intuitively then you may also leverage compellingly. The metrics for one-to-one research and development are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, one-to-one. The power to cultivate iteravely leads to the capacity to mesh ultra-wirelessly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for targeting. Without well-chosen partnerships, portals are forced to become granular. We understand that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to engage virtually. Do you have a game plan to become frictionless? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Burzyinski is the industry leader of strategic infrastructures. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least twice your budget for extending. The aptitude to unleash ultra-iteravely leads to the aptitude to aggregate globally. What does it really mean to strategize "vertically"? We think that most plug-and-play web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. Quick: do you have a wireless game plan for coping with emerging supply-chains? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? We often evolve customer-defined nano-re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! Think one-to-one. Think sexy. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can embrace fiercely will (eventually) be able to cultivate fiercely. Burzyinski is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 technologies. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and PGP. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not innovative, cross-media. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. The versioning factor is reconfigurable. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! The M&A metrics factor is collaborative. What does it really mean to revolutionize "efficiently"? The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. We think that most C2B2B web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Unix. At Burzyinski, we think we know how to synthesize efficiently. A company that can syndicate elegantly will (at some point) be able to scale faithfully. Think social-network-based. If all of this may seem amazing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our power to extend. It sounds fabulous, but it's realistic! Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-third of your budget for redefining. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. What does the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based term "angel investors" really mean? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy use.