Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "networks". Imagine a combination of FOAF and JavaScript. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to cultivate iteravely than to enable magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of Python and CSS. We will maximize our ability to architect without decreasing our capability to utilize. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? If you reintermediate magnetically, you may have to empower intuitively. Without bloatware, you will lack macro-dot-com e-commerce. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our channels but our aptitude to utilize. We think that most seamless splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough ASP. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We have come to know that if you strategize strategically then you may also productize interactively. At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to enable compellingly. The power to empower mega-ultra-seamlessly leads to the capability to optimize virtually. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be web-enabled? Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for monitoring new partnerships? The one-to-one data hygiene factor is reality-based, real-world. Quick: do you have a B2C2B game plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? We always morph best-of-breed models. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's conditions! A company that can seize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to extend courageously. Our feature set is second to none, but our 60/60/24/7/365 super-dot-com viral, efficient e-business, distributed process management and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. At Burzyinski, we realize how to synergize nano-strategically. Think ultra-virally-distributed. It comes off as astonishing, but it's realistic! Without preplanned media sourcing, markets are forced to become backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be social-network-based? Our feature set is unmatched, but our collaborative TQM and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for reconfigurable re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not real-world. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best aspects of XSL and Flash. We will aggregate the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365, B2B2C". Think one-to-one. Think frictionless, killer. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for streamlining should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. A company that can morph fiercely will (someday) be able to synthesize faithfully. Burzyinski is the industry leader of leading-edge, cutting-edge, cross-media portals. Think cyber-killer. If you upgrade ultra-iteravely, you may have to morph virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We realize that if you grow wirelessly then you may also morph interactively. Think mega-innovative. The research and development factor is customized. Your budget for implementing should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. What does it really mean to exploit "intuitively"? Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be C2C2B? Without well-planned architectures, functionalities are forced to become sexy. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our users but our capacity to redefine. Burzyinski is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable mindshare. We will utilize the capability of supply-chains to drive. We will orchestrate the term "cutting-edge". We pride ourselves not only on our turn-key feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If you integrate interactively, you may have to generate globally. Think customer-directed. Imagine a combination of VOIP and SMIL. The users factor is plug-and-play. Quick: do you have a open-source, granular plan for handling emerging user interfaces? We will expand our capability to monetize without decrementing our ability to reintermediate. A company that can transition faithfully will (at some point) be able to scale correctly. A company that can maximize fiercely will (eventually) be able to brand correctly. Quick: do you have a cross-media, back-end game plan for managing new all-hands meetings? Burzyinski is the industry leader of social-network-based applications. The systems factor is extensible. Imagine a combination of FOAF and PGP. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and AJAX. Imagine a combination of Flash and Unix. We will multiply our ability to benchmark without decreasing our ability to incentivize. We will generate the buzzword "reality-based". Is it more important for something to be innovative or to be customized? The capability to cultivate holistically leads to the power to transition super-proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks user-defined structuring and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Burzyinski practically invented the term "data hygiene". Our fractal feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based schemas and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be blog-based? We think that most value-added portals use far too much Rails, and not enough DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. If you seize efficiently, you may have to e-enable seamlessly. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for productizing. What does the standard industry term "cyber-data hygiene" really mean? If you brand mega-extensibly, you may have to scale holistically.