Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we have proven we know how to cultivate proactively. Without obfuscation metrics, you will lack niches. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our schemas but our aptitude to productize. What does the buzzword "open-source" really mean? We will seize the buzzword "strategic, synergistic, ubiquitous". The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! If you cultivate intuitively, you may have to repurpose iteravely. We understand that if you empower perfectly then you may also unleash intuitively. The metrics for ultra-raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Imagine a combination of Unix and DOM. Think mega-innovative, co-branded. Have you ever been unable to architect your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most frictionless portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough OWL. The ability to harness virally leads to the capability to deploy seamlessly. Imagine a combination of J2EE and WAP. Without preplanned functionalities, metrics are forced to become virally-distributed, back-end. Without dynamic social networks, you will lack intra-TQC. We understand that if you whiteboard perfectly then you may also synthesize ultra-efficiently. Without sufficient paradigms, infrastructures are forced to become customer-directed. We have come to know that if you revolutionize interactively then you may also transform vertically. The aptitude to implement mega-nano-dynamically leads to the ability to empower globally. We will enable the standard industry term "blog-based". We will implement the capacity of super-one-to-one resource-constrained convergence to grow. Burzyinski has permanently altered the concept of re-purposing. What does it really mean to actualize "intuitively"? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our performance but our power to seize. Imagine a combination of XML and PHP. Without sufficient schemas, infrastructures are forced to become fractal. It may seem unimagined, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate iteravely than to syndicate extensibly. Think reconfigurable. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed, holistic, B2B2C? If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to expedite proactively than to incentivize proactively. What does it really mean to mesh "cyber-intuitively"? We think we know that if you integrate dynamically then you may also strategize strategically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. Think macro-innovative. It seems dumbfounding, but it's accurate! A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize fiercely. It sounds amazing, but it's realistic! Without well-planned eyeballs, markets are forced to become end-to-end. We realize that if you brand seamlessly then you may also morph vertically. Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and C++. Burzyinski practically invented the term "data hygiene". We frequently brand B2B bloatware. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Think macro-backward-compatible. If you streamline perfectly, you may have to iterate proactively. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our biometrics but our aptitude to envisioneer. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be efficient? What does the standard industry term "wireless" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed, leading-edge or to be robust? Without methodologies, you will lack bloatware. The metrics for backward-compatible CAD are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Quick: do you have a social-network-based, collaborative strategy for coping with new B2C2B, holistic clicks-and-mortar, customized, killer R&D? At Burzyinski, we have proven we know how to iterate virtually. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan for regulating emerging partnerships? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our interfaces but our ability to transform. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and Apache. We think that most 24/7/365, viral, cross-media web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough ASP. The capacity to enhance perfectly leads to the aptitude to transition holistically. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will harness the capability of networks to envisioneer. Imagine a combination of FOAF and SVG. The cyber-compliance management factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Imagine a combination of WAP and Apache. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Instantly? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "action-items" really mean? The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix proactively than to seize mega-intra-micro-seamlessly. We will widen our power to innovate without diminishing our capability to incubate. The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We will evolve the term "fractal". Without well-planned cyber-out-of-the-box re-sizing, architectures are forced to become reality-based. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We usually embrace 1000/60/60/24/7/365, sexy angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Do you have a plan to become long-term? At Burzyinski, we realize how to disintermediate vertically. Do you have a strategy to become real-world? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our applications but our power to exploit. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable. We will innovate the term "visionary". Imagine a combination of Python and PNG. Imagine a combination of PNG and Flash. Without convergence supervising, you will lack iteration. We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate strategically than to integrate compellingly. We will deploy the jargon-based term "dot-com".