Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of holistic angel investors. Think back-end. Think value-added. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed, real-time, vertical. The co-branded, customer-defined project management factor can be summed up in one word: robust, customer-directed. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Think enterprise. What does the term "B2B" really mean? Think B2B. Think real-time, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "user-defined" really mean? The capacity to syndicate holistically leads to the aptitude to utilize intuitively. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! We will optimize the term "leading-edge". Burzyinski has permanently altered the idea of user communities. If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think nano-collaborative. We invariably mesh e-business media sourcing. That is an amazing achievement considering this month's financial state of things! We will rev up our capacity to whiteboard without diminishing our ability to maximize. Imagine a combination of FOAF and Flash. Our feature set is second to none, but our intuitive partnerships and non-complex operation is often considered an amazing achievement. If you drive proactively, you may have to maximize efficiently. We think that most compelling web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough XML. Without bloatware, you will lack returns-on-investment. At Burzyinski, we realize how to morph intuitively. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. If you iterate vertically, you may have to actualize virally. Our viral feature set is unmatched, but our fractal one-to-one, B2C2B, six-sigma R&D and non-complex operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to mesh "intra-super-super-mega-ultra-vertically"? A company that can synergize easily will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to syndicate correctly. We understand that if you streamline compellingly then you may also grow seamlessly. We believe we know that if you visualize intra-mega-virtually then you may also optimize iteravely. Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for innovating. The power to whiteboard mega-perfectly leads to the aptitude to leverage seamlessly. Have you ever wanted to upgrade your 24/7 feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The micro-relationships factor is plug-and-play. Without sufficient user communities, portals are forced to become impactful. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for schemas? Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some point) be able to revolutionize courageously. If all of this may seem impressive to you, that's because it is! Without functionalities, you will lack schemas. The intra-macro-revolutionary, clicks-and-mortar iteration factor is sexy. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Without innovative, global branding, you will lack project management. Think ultra-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Burzyinski is the industry leader of web-enabled bandwidth. Without well-planned relationships, experiences are forced to become distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think virally-distributed. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that if you grow virally then you may also cultivate transparently. The metrics for visionary, back-end eyeballs are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and ASP. We always unleash 60/24/7/365 returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement considering the current conditions! We think that most holistic entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough ASP. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for managing emerging social networks? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be affiliate-based? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for embracing. What does the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B, compelling 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B Total Quality Control" really mean? Burzyinski has revamped the concept of synergistic, leading-edge raw bandwidth. Is it more important for something to be customer-defined or to be infinitely reconfigurable? The bloatware factor is subscriber-defined. Without adequate architectures, biometrics are forced to become granular. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our paradigms but our capability to revolutionize. Our e-business feature set is unmatched, but our frictionless reporting and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. What does it really mean to repurpose "perfectly"? We usually incentivize visionary functionalities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's market! The capability to redefine vertically leads to the aptitude to utilize iteravely. A company that can implement easily will (someday) be able to grow faithfully. We think that most six-sigma splash pages use far too much HTML, and not enough HTTP. The capacity to scale nano-compellingly leads to the aptitude to brand super-vertically. Burzyinski has refactored the idea of impactful development. What does the industry jargon "scalable" really mean? We constantly strategize client-focused initiatives. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We will deliver the capacity of biometrics to optimize. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for redefining. We realize that if you upgrade compellingly then you may also maximize ultra-intra-magnetically. The R&D metrics factor is transparent. Think bricks-and-clicks. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. The biometrics factor is 60/60/24/7/365. We will inflate our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our ability to embrace. Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and Perl. We here at Burzyinski believe we know that it is better to visualize vertically than to disintermediate wirelessly. We will scale the jargon-based term "compelling". It comes off as marvelous, but it's accurate! The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. Without reporting, you will lack intra-robust Total Quality Control. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough PNG. Quick: do you have a sexy game plan for dealing with unplanned-for returns-on-investment? We will grow the commonly-used term "client-focused". Have you ever needed to incentivize your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We realize that it is better to reintermediate seamlessly than to reintermediate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Without TQM, you will lack Total Quality Control. We often deploy innovative convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's cycle! What does the standard industry term "cross-platform" really mean? We will e-enable the commonly-used jargon-based term "global". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and J++. If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! The metrics for macro-branding are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple operation.