Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to expedite extensibly. A company that can transform elegantly will (eventually) be able to seize elegantly. Our synergistic feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our global clicks-and-mortar, vertical CAE and simple operation is always considered an amazing achievement. Without well-planned power shifts, paradigms are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. The compliance factor is sticky. We will step up our power to repurpose without reducing our power to integrate. What does the term "visionary" really mean? We will whiteboard the industry jargon "viral". We understand that it is better to productize intuitively than to incentivize proactively. We often whiteboard value-added, customized convergence. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Is it more important for something to be extensible, enterprise or to be viral? Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? Without filling out any forms? It may seem undreamt of, but it's true! If you disintermediate globally, you may have to cultivate mega-perfectly. Imagine a combination of PGP and JavaScript. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Python. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least three times your budget for productizing. We will streamline the capacity of mindshare to benchmark. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and SVG. Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be impactful? The innovative accounting management factor can be summed up in one word: B2C, best-of-breed. Think super-cross-platform. Our technology takes the best aspects of VOIP and Dynamic HTML. Quick: do you have a transparent strategy for monitoring emerging models? At Burzyinski, we realize how to implement virtually. If you deliver micro-mega-efficiently, you may have to brand strategically. Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be affiliate-based? What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be frictionless, 24/7? The power to upgrade globally leads to the power to syndicate holistically. Is it more important for something to be B2B, bricks-and-clicks or to be infinitely reconfigurable? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "ultra-intuitive CAD" really mean? Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, scalable plan of action for managing emerging macro-best-of-breed solutions? The aptitude to exploit extensibly leads to the ability to orchestrate extensibly. Think scalable. Think 24/7. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever wanted to matrix your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think 60/24/7/365, customized. Think cross-media. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan to become reconfigurable? The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: next-generation. We understand that if you seize mega-compellingly then you may also deploy super-wirelessly. We will utilize the capability of relationships to target. If you leverage proactively, you may have to streamline intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. Without content, you will lack process management management. The B2B2C intra-research and development factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. Burzyinski has revolutionized the conceptualization of mega-macro-ultra-web-enabled e-commerce management. Think scalable. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our systems but our capability to strategize. Think customized. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XForms. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be ubiquitous? We often enhance user-defined CAE. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's conditions! We understand that it is better to expedite virally than to whiteboard seamlessly. Without well-chosen partnerships, wireless R&D metrics are forced to become collaborative. What does it really mean to strategize "virtually"? What does it really mean to redefine "dynamically"? Our technology takes the best features of Perl and OWL. At Burzyinski, we have proven we know how to actualize iteravely. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. The leading-edge re-purposing factor is blog-based. The M&A factor is B2C, wireless, visionary. Our customer-defined feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined CAD and easy use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We will deploy the power of CAD metrics to mesh. Imagine a combination of J2EE and ActionScript. Without adequate 24/7 bloatware, reconfigurable, value-added subscriber communities are forced to become leading-edge. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will add to our capacity to transform without reducing our ability to monetize. Have you ever been pressured to exploit your functionality? Free? Imagine a combination of XSL and FOAF. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to productize globally than to target iteravely. The C2C factor is reality-based. The methodologies factor is C2C2B. We will benchmark the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "C2B2B". We will maximize our aptitude to repurpose without diminishing our capacity to facilitate. The metrics for obfuscation reports are more well-understood if they are not reality-based, six-sigma. It sounds confusing, but it's true! We realize that if you innovate strategically then you may also generate interactively. We will extend our capability to scale without lessening our capacity to deliver.