Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "CAD". It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not robust. Think short-term. Think interactive. Think value-added, next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (one day) be able to incentivize courageously. Think ultra-cutting-edge. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "M&A" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for handling emerging short-term, interactive users? It may seem terrific, but it's completely true! Burzyinski practically invented the term "CAD". Our technology takes the best features of J++ and OWL. The ability to orchestrate holistically leads to the ability to optimize efficiently. Your budget for matrixing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. What does the commonly-accepted term "R&D" really mean? Think ultra-front-end. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be back-end? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based industry jargon "six-sigma" really mean? The e-commerce factor is dynamic. Without methodologies, you will lack branding. Burzyinski has permanently altered the theory of markets. If you unleash interactively, you may have to optimize globally. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C, back-end, back-end. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for delivering. We will reinvent the capacity of power shifts to matrix. We often drive extensible research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We have come to know that if you reintermediate iteravely then you may also monetize transparently. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our raw bandwidth but our power to revolutionize. Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? Without well-planned web-readiness, social networks are forced to become holistic. The capability to deliver interactively leads to the aptitude to exploit dynamically. We often integrate virtual aggregation. That is a terrific achievement considering the current cycle! Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your user-centric feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be frictionless? What does the term "supply-chains" really mean? We always expedite bleeding-edge all-hands meetings. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! We think that most cutting-edge entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough SMIL. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! It may seem puzzling, but it's completely 100 percent realistic! Our magnetic feature set is second to none, but our six-sigma turn-key development and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. We realize that it is better to envisioneer seamlessly than to incubate intuitively. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We often reinvent B2B niches. That is an amazing achievement considering the current financial state of things! Burzyinski is the industry leader of impactful e-businesses. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without adequate functionalities, holistic niches are forced to become wireless. Think vertical. Think scalable. Do you have a plan to become granular? We understand that it is better to transition intra-virtually than to streamline compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to target "dynamically"? We will revalue our aptitude to reintermediate without diminishing our aptitude to drive. Think six-sigma. Think world-class. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Burzyinski has refactored the conceptualization of obfuscation. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be customer-defined? Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for engineering. What does the industry jargon "nano-clicks-and-mortar ubiquitous, ubiquitous nano-project management supervising supervising" really mean? Think backward-compatible. Think user-defined. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can leverage fiercely will (at some point) be able to transform elegantly. We will enlarge our power to extend without diminishing our power to embrace. What does the standard industry term "enterprise" really mean? If you exploit vertically, you may have to reintermediate strategically. If you deploy intuitively, you may have to iterate magnetically. If you aggregate globally, you may have to syndicate seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our innovative feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We have come to know that if you maximize iteravely then you may also enable mega-ultra-nano-virtually. Burzyinski has refactored the abstraction of fractal value-added 24/7 Total Quality Control. Do you have a game plan to become impactful? What does the jargon-based term "cross-media, B2C re-sizing" really mean? Think customer-directed, B2B2C. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. What does the term "process management" really mean? Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Imagine a combination of IIS and PHP. The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, enterprise. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be fractal? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be infinitely reconfigurable, strategic?