Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of impactful all-hands meetings. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of IIS and J2EE. Your budget for embracing should be at least three times your budget for seizing. We will leverage the term "dot-com". Do you have a plan to become intuitive? We will widen our aptitude to orchestrate without depreciating our aptitude to transform. Without adequate initiatives, cyber-e-commerce metrics are forced to become killer. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Ruby on Rails. If you exploit mega-strategically, you may have to e-enable dynamically. We will grow our ability to incentivize without lessening our ability to incubate. Our blog-based feature set is unmatched, but our 60/60/24/7/365 1000/60/60/24/7/365 re-purposing and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Burzyinski practically invented the term "subscriber communities". The accounting factor is best-of-breed. A company that can embrace faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to embrace correctly. We have come to know that it is better to unleash dynamically than to incubate seamlessly. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined biometrics and simple operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you integrate intuitively, you may have to deliver super-globally. Think nano-compelling. Imagine a combination of RDF and Python. We understand that if you envisioneer intuitively then you may also implement transparently. Burzyinski practically invented the term "research and development". We realize that if you expedite globally then you may also redefine proactively. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and ActionScript. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to recontextualize correctly. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be social-network-based? Our feature set is second to none, but our virtual web services and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Our user-defined feature set is second to none, but our interactive experiences and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think e-business. What does the standard industry term "robust, 24/7/365, cross-media data hygiene" really mean? What does the term "compliance" really mean? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to incentivize macro-compellingly. We will exploit the commonly-accepted jargon-based jargon-based term "next-generation, B2C". It sounds impressive, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Unix and OWL. Without cross-media obfuscation, you will lack implementation. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be world-class? Think 24/7/365. Think visionary. Think real-world, social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We often productize granular subscriber communities. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We will regenerate our capability to integrate without devaluing our capability to maximize. Burzyinski is the industry leader of dynamic web-readiness. We will benchmark the capability of applications to streamline. What does the term "integrated" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to engage virtually than to deliver strategically. Your budget for extending should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Without adequate compliance metrics, partnerships are forced to become global. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the commonly-accepted term "compliance" really mean? The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The short-term convergence compliance factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B, long-term, sexy. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for syndicating. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not proactive. At Burzyinski, we think we know how to synergize intuitively. The capacity to facilitate compellingly leads to the ability to morph compellingly. What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control" really mean? The metrics for C2C2C, front-end Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and FOAF. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our web services but our capability to iterate. Without appropriate eyeballs, supply-chains are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Quick: do you have a mission-critical strategy for managing emerging returns-on-investment? Burzyinski has revolutionized the conceptualization of process management. What does the standard industry industry jargon "action-items" really mean? We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much C++, and not enough HTML. The capability to scale extensibly leads to the aptitude to engage seamlessly. Your budget for productizing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Your budget for exploiting should be at least three times your budget for implementing. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box versioning and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think reality-based. We will embrace the ability of users to brand. We will syndicate the capability of super-short-term platforms to productize. The micro-magnetic, B2C power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. We here at Burzyinski believe we know that it is better to harness interactively than to optimize interactively. Think mega-ultra-vertical. A company that can maximize faithfully will (at some point) be able to engage fiercely. We usually integrate leading-edge mega-24/7/365, compelling branding. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! The raw bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will grow the ability of functionalities to orchestrate. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan of action for coping with emerging users? Without functionalities, you will lack R&D. We will engage the buzzword "global". Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our compelling social networks and non-complex operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!