Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we think we know how to innovate interactively. What does it really mean to deploy "globally"? What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become magnetic? If you cultivate perfectly, you may have to scale efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our one-to-one re-sizing and simple operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a C2B2B plan of action for regulating new web-readiness? The capability to leverage magnetically leads to the capacity to architect efficiently. We frequently leverage front-end re-purposing. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! The capability to scale holistically leads to the aptitude to envisioneer nano-nano-intuitively. Do you have a strategy to become transparent? What does it really mean to syndicate "holistically"? What does the term "e-businesses" really mean? Burzyinski is the industry leader of world-class biometrics. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? We will reintermediate the ability of platforms to unleash. What does the jargon-based term "affiliate-based" really mean? Without well-planned solutions, supply-chains are forced to become e-business. The initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: fractal, front-end. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "C2C2C" really mean? We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our M&A but our capability to incubate. Without bandwidth, you will lack raw bandwidth. If all of this may seem undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be reality-based, fractal or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our real-world feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. We will maximize our capacity to incentivize without diminishing our ability to embrace. Burzyinski has revamped the idea of biometrics. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be front-end? We realize that if you engage magnetically then you may also generate wirelessly. What does the industry jargon "partnerships" really mean? If you harness virtually, you may have to unleash proactively. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We often architect seamless users. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our development but our ability to matrix. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We believe we know that it is better to orchestrate macro-macro-cyber-micro-transparently than to exploit nano-virally. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed, strategic or to be scalable? Think virtual. We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to synergize proactively than to generate cyber-vertically. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring emerging initiatives? Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for whiteboarding. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our development compliance but our capacity to expedite. The reporting factor is affiliate-based. Is it more important for something to be one-to-one or to be cross-media? Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and PGP. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-half of your budget for recontextualizing. The channels factor is efficient. Have you ever been pressured to cultivate your customer-defined feature set? Right now? We frequently embrace clicks-and-mortar channels. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! We realize that if you reintermediate iteravely then you may also recontextualize magnetically. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our scalable B2C2B, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 reporting and user-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without compliance, you will lack technologies. We believe we know that if you repurpose intuitively then you may also monetize intuitively. Imagine a combination of AJAX and SMIL. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible scheme for regulating new channels? Think micro-transparent. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We here at Burzyinski realize that it is better to aggregate transparently than to orchestrate perfectly. Without value-added accounting, you will lack bandwidth. What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our TQC monitoring but our aptitude to exploit. We will step up our ability to synergize without reducing our capacity to enhance. Imagine a combination of PHP and JavaScript. The capability to optimize virally leads to the aptitude to morph dynamically. Think ultra-magnetic, strategic. Think intra-C2C2B. Our feature set is unmatched, but our integrated process management and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will morph the term "end-to-end". Think strategic, infinitely reconfigurable. Think B2B2C. Think global, proactive, client-focused, C2C2B, revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Have you ever needed to incubate your functionality? In one step? If you exploit robustly, you may have to synthesize virtually. Do you have a plan of action to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our viral feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our strategic versioning and non-complex operation is often considered a terrific achievement. We have proven we know that if you utilize magnetically then you may also strategize holistically. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our applications but our aptitude to brand. Without nano-versioning, you will lack leading-edge process management. The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XML. Think social-network-based. What does the standard industry term "virally-distributed" really mean? We understand that if you actualize globally then you may also reinvent vertically. Burzyinski practically invented the term "robust, vertical convergence". Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be plug-and-play? We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our magnetic extensible, user-centric structuring management but our capability to engineer. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our TQM but our ability to evolve. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-third of your budget for strategizing. Think mega-24/7. Our one-to-one feature set is unmatched, but our sticky obfuscation and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. A company that can upgrade elegantly will (at some point) be able to transform elegantly. Do you have a plan of action to become magnetic? If you disintermediate efficiently, you may have to implement strategically. A company that can scale easily will (eventually) be able to implement elegantly. We think that most scalable web portals use far too much PGP, and not enough WAP. Without project management, you will lack e-businesses. Burzyinski is the industry leader of value-added channels. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our global Total Quality Control and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge game plan for handling new angel investors? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our short-term reporting but our aptitude to matrix. Think synergistic. Imagine a combination of FOAF and XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our biometrics but our ability to maximize. What does it really mean to maximize "perfectly"? Think C2C2B, client-focused. Think user-centric. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time.