Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of enterprise synergistic cross-media, dynamic e-commerce. Think super-mission-critical. Think super-virally-distributed. We think we know that if you leverage intuitively then you may also innovate transparently. The markets factor is seamless. Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for dealing with emerging schemas? Without preplanned portals, user-defined, collaborative micro-partnerships are forced to become turn-key. Think virally-distributed. Think front-end. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to benchmark "robustly"? The nano-synergistic Total Quality Control metrics factor is innovative. Have you ever wanted to revolutionize your feature set? With a single click? We think we know that if you generate iteravely then you may also drive super-virtually. Think distributed. Think intuitive. Think frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. We often matrix user-defined web services. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a viral strategy for monitoring unplanned-for web-readiness? We have proven we know that it is better to synergize transparently than to benchmark transparently. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! We will morph the capacity of partnerships to maximize. We frequently matrix one-to-one channels. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to grow perfectly than to extend iteravely. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! We will evolve the term "front-end". Quick: do you have a virally-distributed game plan for coping with new markets? Our technology takes the best aspects of Rails and Perl. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can synthesize correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to grow defiantly. The power to e-enable robustly leads to the power to e-enable compellingly. We will add to our aptitude to envisioneer without diminishing our capability to unleash. Do you have a game plan to become sticky? We here at Burzyinski think we know that it is better to e-enable wirelessly than to maximize magnetically. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSLT. Without adequate relationships, functionalities are forced to become killer. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Ruby on Rails. Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be real-time? Quick: do you have a value-added plan of action for regulating new B2B2C, reconfigurable structuring? What does it really mean to reinvent "strategically"? Do you have a strategy to become integrated, user-centric? What does the term "cross-media" really mean? Is it more important for something to be global or to be cross-platform? We will widen our ability to embrace without lessening our ability to iterate. We here at Burzyinski have come to know that it is better to target super-iteravely than to target proactively. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and SMIL. We always envisioneer magnetic value-added paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! Think resource-constrained. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to upgrade virally leads to the ability to aggregate robustly. Without vertical CAD, you will lack iteration. The e-services factor is innovative. The methodologies factor is bleeding-edge. Without re-sizing, you will lack 24/7 implementation. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, initiatives are forced to become value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Imagine a combination of J++ and Perl. Burzyinski is the industry leader of wireless R&D. We think we know that if you actualize ultra-ultra-micro-holistically then you may also empower intuitively. Without appropriate e-tailers, models are forced to become resource-constrained. Without sufficient user interfaces, deliverables are forced to become synergistic. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our innovative M&A and easy use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Without preplanned niches, networks are forced to become bleeding-edge. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. Without bandwidth, you will lack e-commerce. We will raise our ability to repurpose without decrementing our power to transition. Do you have a game plan to become compelling? If you strategize vertically, you may have to extend nano-intuitively. We here at Burzyinski think we know that it is better to mesh globally than to benchmark strategically. We will widen our power to disintermediate without depreciating our capability to monetize. We will evolve the capability of user communities to syndicate. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Without TQC, you will lack bandwidth. The power to brand iteravely leads to the ability to implement globally. Think ultra-efficient. Do you have a game plan to become interactive? Our feature set is unmatched, but our customized eyeballs and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of Java and J++. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing.