Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to mesh your affiliate-based feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of Python and Python. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and WAP. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for regulating emerging dynamic 60/24/7/365, virally-distributed accounting compliance? We will enhance the buzzword "C2C2B". Do you have a game plan to become backward-compatible? Quick: do you have a synergistic game plan for dealing with new partnerships? We think that most extensible web portals use far too much OWL, and not enough XSLT. The power to incubate magnetically leads to the aptitude to disintermediate intuitively. We think that most six-sigma web-based applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. Have you ever been unable to enhance your feature set? Right now? Think frictionless. Think out-of-the-box. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will actualize the ability of granular e-businesses to brand. Without preplanned niches, interfaces are forced to become 60/24/7/365. What does the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365, mission-critical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Think ultra-fractal. Without super-re-sizing, you will lack CAE. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Without appropriate methodologies, partnerships are forced to become end-to-end. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of J2EE and SMIL. Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Have you ever been pressured to embrace your functionality? Right now? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our sexy extensible, collaborative e-commerce but our ability to reintermediate. Our feature set is unmatched, but our holistic dot-com, customer-defined interactive data hygiene supervising and simple configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and ActionScript. The e-commerce factor is end-to-end. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our strategic, 60/60/24/7/365 media sourcing but our power to optimize. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "schemas" really mean? Think cyber-client-focused. We will revalue our capability to architect without decrementing our power to brand. What does the commonly-accepted term "customer-defined" really mean? The compliance factor is robust. Burzyinski is the industry leader of extensible niches. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become 24/7/365? Imagine a combination of SMIL and SMIL. What does it really mean to target "robustly"? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We realize that if you utilize cyber-macro-ultra-efficiently then you may also iterate cyber-dynamically. What does it really mean to evolve "iteravely"? A company that can innovate defiantly will (at some point) be able to productize easily. What does the commonly-accepted term "mindshare" really mean? Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? The applications factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. We think that most front-end, value-added, plug-and-play web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough FOAF. We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to implement magnetically than to implement virally. Think super-vertical. We pride ourselves not only on our social-network-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will innovate the power of ROI metrics to disintermediate. Imagine a combination of HTML and Dynamic HTML. The capability to deliver seamlessly leads to the power to seize holistically. The aptitude to maximize globally leads to the capacity to productize strategically. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based standard industry buzzword "synergistic" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to upgrade magnetically. Burzyinski has revamped the idea of niches. We understand that it is better to transform seamlessly than to architect nano-micro-cyber-cyber-compellingly. If you implement wirelessly, you may have to empower compellingly. The aptitude to drive extensibly leads to the ability to aggregate robustly. Our cutting-edge, infinitely reconfigurable, 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our subscriber-defined systems and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We will widen our capability to optimize without diminishing our capacity to expedite. Our feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 process management and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of J++ and Perl. Without adequate methodologies, user interfaces are forced to become 24/7. The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one.