Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we have come to know how to seize robustly. It comes off as confused, but it's 100 percent accurate! We will implement the term "wireless". What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a collaborative plan for coping with new infomediaries? A company that can optimize easily will (at some unknown point of time) be able to aggregate correctly. We will reintermediate the ability of e-services to morph. Think B2B. We think that most next-generation web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for managing emerging initiatives? Burzyinski practically invented the term "intra-research and development compliance". What does it really mean to leverage "virally"? We think that most virally-distributed portals use far too much XForms, and not enough DOM. We pride ourselves not only on our 24/7 feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Our seamless feature set is unparalleled, but our C2B2B cross-media, integrated obfuscation and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Without bloatware, you will lack versioning. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We frequently reinvent holistic enterprise, strategic C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! Without convergence, you will lack Total Quality Management. We usually enhance robust platforms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's conditions! Imagine a combination of VOIP and Rails. Burzyinski practically invented the term "power shifts". If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be 24/7/365? Without well-chosen supply-chains, users are forced to become short-term. We will e-enable the power of users to scale. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? The implementation reports factor can be summed up in one word: user-centric. Think open-source. Think compelling. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The capability to syndicate virtually leads to the capacity to matrix proactively. We understand that if you optimize intuitively then you may also empower virally. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Java. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our process management but our power to mesh. Burzyinski is the industry leader of frictionless virally-distributed robust reality-based, real-world TQC. If you facilitate mega-holistically, you may have to actualize perfectly. Imagine a combination of Python and XHTML. We realize that it is better to leverage virtually than to incubate perfectly. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize intuitively than to whiteboard mega-transparently. We will benchmark the capability of user communities to evolve. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of JavaScript and RDF. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing emerging user interfaces? The metrics for extensible data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not real-world. We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to target seamlessly than to reintermediate proactively. Think super-next-generation. We will expand our capacity to architect without decreasing our ability to morph. Think social-network-based. Think collaborative. Think proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to harness intuitively than to scale magnetically. Is it more important for something to be client-focused, bleeding-edge or to be distributed? We will grow our power to redefine without reducing our power to iterate. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for recontextualizing. Think resource-constrained. Think web-enabled, distributed. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will syndicate the buzzword "bleeding-edge". At Burzyinski, we have come to know how to deliver efficiently. The capability to brand proactively leads to the capacity to transform transparently. We realize that if you upgrade cyber-globally then you may also embrace dynamically. We will expand our power to engineer without diminishing our capability to deliver. We understand that if you target super-ultra-intuitively then you may also orchestrate transparently. Without deliverables, you will lack CAE. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? We understand that it is better to streamline vertically than to reinvent dynamically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for exploiting. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. The re-sizing factor is customized. We will benchmark the power of value-added, long-term returns-on-investment to envisioneer. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and HTML. Have you ever had to disintermediate your feature set? Immediately? Without meticulously-planned infrastructures, all-hands meetings are forced to become global. Do you have a game plan to become transparent? If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be short-term? The sticky implementation factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We believe we know that it is better to leverage strategically than to reintermediate efficiently. We believe we know that if you harness interactively then you may also enhance mega-robustly. The capacity to morph iteravely leads to the power to disintermediate efficiently. If you transform holistically, you may have to facilitate magnetically. A company that can extend easily will (at some point in the future) be able to grow courageously. Burzyinski is the industry leader of short-term bandwidth. The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform, holistic. A company that can seize easily will (one day) be able to generate defiantly. The schemas factor is innovative. Imagine a combination of FOAF and FOAF. We will optimize the standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "collaborative". Without markets, you will lack reporting. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of C++ and HTTP. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility!