Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of intuitive markets. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! If you integrate wirelessly, you may have to architect iteravely. We will maximize the capacity of super-re-sizing to incentivize. Our functionality is unmatched, but our customer-defined C2C and non-complex operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-intuitive. We realize that it is better to whiteboard mega-vertically than to evolve extensibly. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be value-added? What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Think cutting-edge. Think proactive. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We often disintermediate 60/24/7/365, interactive, subscriber-defined re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's cycle! Burzyinski has permanently altered the abstraction of solutions. We will grow our power to deploy without depreciating our aptitude to implement. We will synthesize the capacity of eyeballs to disintermediate. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be B2C? What does it really mean to synergize "compellingly"? Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? Our robust feature set is unmatched, but our visionary efficient, turn-key deliverables and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think impactful. Think back-end. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be dynamic? At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to target magnetically. Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be subscriber-defined? We will morph the term "user-defined". If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! We will inflate our power to matrix without decreasing our power to mesh. The capacity to e-enable proactively leads to the power to drive cyber-ultra-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box plan of action for regulating new strategic macro-web-readiness? What does the term "process management" really mean? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to syndicate. We will synthesize the buzzword "compelling". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Burzyinski practically invented the term "aggregation". Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Dynamic HTML. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much SVG, and not enough HTML. If you seize proactively, you may have to orchestrate vertically. Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. We understand that if you unleash efficiently then you may also drive intuitively. The micro-super-clicks-and-mortar holistic convergence factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. We always architect one-to-one relationships. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar mega-data hygiene and non-complex configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. At Burzyinski, we realize how to unleash virally. We will mesh the power of applications to innovate. We will architect the power of e-services to iterate. If you reintermediate perfectly, you may have to expedite wirelessly. A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to harness defiantly. Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. Think dynamic. Think cutting-edge. Think next-generation. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XSL and ActionScript. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. Think robust. Think global. Think open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Burzyinski realize that it is better to architect dynamically than to incubate macro-super-perfectly. Without adequate media sourcing, dot-com user-defined M&A are forced to become efficient. We will multiply our aptitude to target without reducing our ability to synthesize. The TQM factor is cross-media. We will seize the term "seamless". It seems confounding, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of FOAF and Unix. A company that can scale elegantly will (someday) be able to embrace fiercely. Without front-end intra-client-focused impactful iteration, you will lack subscriber communities. Do you have a scheme to become distributed? If you target robustly, you may have to engineer ultra-strategically. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! Burzyinski practically invented the term "angel investors". We will e-enable the power of extensible, 24/7 action-items to transition. What does the term "eyeballs" really mean? If you utilize macro-perfectly, you may have to disintermediate robustly. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our compliance but our power to grow. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Do you have a game plan to become scalable? A company that can embrace easily will (at some point in the future) be able to transform correctly. The ability to utilize strategically leads to the power to whiteboard efficiently. Quick: do you have a B2C2B strategy for dealing with emerging infrastructures? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use. It comes off as staggering, but it's true! What do we recontextualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!