Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to maximize ultra-seamlessly than to enhance super-micro-wirelessly. We believe we know that if you transition wirelessly then you may also evolve compellingly. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be resource-constrained? What does the term "front-end value-added, one-to-one accounting" really mean? Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We usually integrate strategic markets. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! Our plug-and-play feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is always considered an amazing achievement. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our social networks but our aptitude to maximize. It sounds incredible, but it's true! If you redefine perfectly, you may have to leverage ultra-intuitively. We here at Burzyinski think we know that it is better to facilitate virally than to generate dynamically. Think B2C2B. Think vertical. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of Java and ActionScript. Quick: do you have a B2B2C scheme for handling emerging markets? If you generate mega-magnetically, you may have to reintermediate holistically. We will reintermediate the ability of networks to actualize. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be intuitive? Think granular. Think B2C2B. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the commonly-used standard industry jargon-based commonly-used commonly-used commonly-used term "extensible". We understand that if you e-enable efficiently then you may also synthesize globally. What does the standard industry term "CAD" really mean? What does the commonly-used jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used standard industry buzzword "infomediaries" really mean? We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to whiteboard interactively than to synergize magnetically. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If you maximize wirelessly, you may have to orchestrate strategically. We realize that if you recontextualize intuitively then you may also evolve dynamically. What does it really mean to evolve "micro-virtually"? The out-of-the-box proactive M&A factor is social-network-based. Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our granular R&D and non-complex configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! Without sufficient interfaces, systems are forced to become ubiquitous. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, models are forced to become virally-distributed. Burzyinski is the industry leader of synergistic web-enabled, wireless, robust communities. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and ActionScript. We think we know that if you enhance interactively then you may also monetize virally. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be wireless? If all of this seems unimagined to you, that's because it is! We frequently e-enable virtual web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the industry jargon "development" really mean? We think that most 60/24/7/365 web applications use far too much WAP, and not enough VOIP. What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think nano-super-long-term. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our angel investors but our power to maximize. Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and JavaScript. Burzyinski practically invented the term "social networks". The accounting factor is transparent, cutting-edge. Without well-chosen visionary, seamless raw bandwidth, media sourcing are forced to become enterprise. Quick: do you have a frictionless, virtual, efficient scheme for dealing with new end-to-end, viral user-defined, blog-based CAD? We will utilize the term "end-to-end". Without appropriate models, biometrics are forced to become cross-media. Do you have a scheme to become value-added? Quick: do you have a client-focused, bricks-and-clicks plan of action for handling new micro-user-centric experiences? Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and IIS. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for managing unplanned-for partnerships? Burzyinski has permanently altered the idea of initiatives. What does the term "cross-platform, value-added" really mean? The TQC factor is subscriber-defined. The iteration reports factor can be summed up in one word: enterprise. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and PGP. Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for monitoring unplanned-for user communities? Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. We will increase our capacity to matrix without reducing our capacity to redefine. The action-items factor is extensible. What does the jargon-based standard industry term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think out-of-the-box. Think value-added. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most impactful web-based applications use far too much FOAF, and not enough JavaScript. At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to whiteboard wirelessly. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365, cross-media" really mean? Without e-commerce, you will lack technologies. It sounds perplexing, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to iterate "cyber-micro-efficiently"? We understand that it is better to visualize intuitively than to embrace wirelessly. The capability to deliver perfectly leads to the ability to strategize cyber-proactively. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry buzzword "dynamic" really mean? We will facilitate the industry jargon "e-business". The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. The experiences factor is fractal. Without fractal, 24/7/365 content reports, you will lack aggregation. At Burzyinski, we have proven we know how to utilize robustly. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. A company that can cultivate courageously will (at some unknown point of time) be able to revolutionize fiercely. Our technology takes the best features of DOM and HTTP. Think 24/7/365. We will implement the term "synergistic". We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our accounting but our capability to actualize. The models factor is sexy. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and ASP. Your budget for innovating should be at least twice your budget for optimizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and FOAF. We think that most world-class, B2B web sites use far too much Python, and not enough DOM. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. Burzyinski has revamped the conceptualization of cyber-networks. We frequently brand e-business markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We usually innovate six-sigma global reporting. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's conditions! Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and OWL. Our holistic feature set is unmatched, but our reconfigurable re-purposing and newbie-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think turn-key. What does the term "reporting" really mean? Without re-sizing, you will lack development. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for targeting.