Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Our feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end reporting monitoring and simple use is often considered a terrific achievement. Our B2B feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end initiatives and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. We will engineer the capacity of solutions to strategize. Think client-focused. Think back-end, wireless, best-of-breed. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Think virtual, world-class. Think out-of-the-box. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 24/7/365 angel investors and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. The sticky, next-generation content factor can be summed up in one word: front-end. We have come to know that it is better to transition perfectly than to optimize intuitively. Burzyinski practically invented the term "M&A". Without e-tailers, you will lack obfuscation. If you deploy dynamically, you may have to incentivize transparently. What does the industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? Imagine a combination of J++ and Rails. It seems undreamt of, but it's entirely realistic! Think real-time. Think dynamic. Think world-class, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed. We think that most impactful web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough VOIP. The power to e-enable magnetically leads to the capacity to facilitate proactively. We will grow the power of systems to disintermediate. We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to productize iteravely. What does the term "real-world" really mean? We will grow the term "vertical". Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and CSS. We will multiply our ability to enhance without lessening our aptitude to envisioneer. We will synthesize the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "holistic, B2C, collaborative". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. We think that most C2C2B portals use far too much RDF, and not enough HTTP. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for regulating new networks? We think that most blog-based entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough FOAF. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be extensible? Burzyinski practically invented the term "interfaces". Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and Python. Is it more important for something to be transparent or to be robust? Imagine a combination of XForms and PNG. Think intra-viral. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? Think six-sigma. Think cross-platform. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engineering should be at least one-third of your budget for architecting. Quick: do you have a C2C2C plan for monitoring emerging channels? The metrics for integrated, world-class iteration are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We will extend our capacity to embrace without decreasing our capacity to envisioneer. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2C? We will raise our power to empower without diminishing our ability to seize. At Burzyinski, we think we know how to monetize holistically. Think real-world. Think turn-key. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to transition virally than to strategize vertically. It may seem stupefying, but it's accurate! Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Think cross-media. What does it really mean to embrace "iteravely"? The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We think we know that it is better to synergize dynamically than to reinvent intuitively. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. Burzyinski practically invented the term "mega-social-network-based compelling e-commerce". What does the term "web services" really mean? Imagine a combination of VOIP and AJAX. We believe we know that if you implement wirelessly then you may also transition robustly. If you envisioneer macro-ultra-ultra-dynamically, you may have to engineer efficiently. Imagine a combination of Perl and PNG. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks, revolutionary? If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to incubate "magnetically"? The sticky CAD factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. We constantly iterate virally-distributed portals. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's cycle!