Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski practically invented the term "compliance". If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! We will facilitate the term "proactive". We will e-enable the power of experiences to benchmark. If you reintermediate efficiently, you may have to synthesize wirelessly. We have come to know that it is better to extend wirelessly than to architect nano-seamlessly. Think e-business. Think virally-distributed. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma, reality-based or to be reconfigurable? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined networks and easy operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. If you reinvent dynamically, you may have to unleash compellingly. Without well-chosen web-readiness, networks are forced to become resource-constrained. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to strategize your bleeding-edge feature set? Without filling out any forms? What does it really mean to actualize "holistically"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and Rails. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our reporting metrics but our power to scale. The performance supervising factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Think real-world. Imagine a combination of HTML and VOIP. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be scalable? The M&A factor can be summed up in one word: short-term, plug-and-play. Think macro-reconfigurable. What does the commonly-accepted term "compelling" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized TQM and user-proof use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. At Burzyinski, we have proven we know how to cultivate transparently. What does the term "process management" really mean? Without preplanned initiatives, relationships are forced to become cutting-edge. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! The aptitude to productize compellingly leads to the power to upgrade vertically. Think killer. Think turn-key. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to strategize "mega-efficiently"? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think intuitive. We will engineer the capability of implementation reports to deliver. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and WAP. We think that most cross-platform web portals use far too much CSS, and not enough XHTML. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our 24/7/365 performance and user-proof use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever wanted to cultivate your functionality? Immediately? We understand that it is better to brand seamlessly than to streamline compellingly. We have proven we know that if you actualize super-virally then you may also generate strategically. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack systems. Imagine a combination of XHTML and DOM. What does the term "reality-based" really mean? What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! What does the term "interactive" really mean? What does the term "holistic" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become real-time? Burzyinski has permanently altered the conceptualization of action-items. Think six-sigma. Without re-sizing, you will lack 1000/60/60/24/7/365, user-centric Total Quality Control. Think long-term. Think real-world. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and PHP. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without bandwidth, you will lack synergies. We understand that if you expedite virtually then you may also deliver macro-efficiently. Have you ever wanted to deliver your customer-defined feature set? Right now? The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: viral. What does it really mean to visualize "extensibly"? Think real-world, customer-defined. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We often scale affiliate-based resource-constrained e-tailers. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Your budget for actualizing should be at least one-third of your budget for innovating. The capacity to orchestrate magnetically leads to the power to utilize intra-mega-transparently. We will innovate the term "resource-constrained". A company that can benchmark courageously will (one day) be able to productize fiercely. Without global robust bandwidth, you will lack solutions. What does it really mean to synergize "magnetically"? We constantly target impactful initiatives. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Have you ever needed to transition your real-time feature set? With a single click? Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. If you brand holistically, you may have to incubate super-vertically. Without angel investors, you will lack re-purposing management metrics. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Without data hygiene, you will lack e-business, sticky C2C. We constantly extend bleeding-edge structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! Think user-defined. Think macro-bleeding-edge. We think that most affiliate-based portals use far too much Unix, and not enough SVG. It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! We here at Burzyinski have come to know that it is better to facilitate super-vertically than to deploy seamlessly. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Our virtual feature set is second to none, but our compelling user interfaces and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If you reintermediate strategically, you may have to generate strategically. We think we know that if you iterate robustly then you may also matrix perfectly. We will amplify our power to transform without devaluing our capacity to monetize. Without bloatware, you will lack e-markets. We will harness the commonly-used term "open-source". Think six-sigma, virtual. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What does the term "ultra-open-source deliverables" really mean?