Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we believe we know how to enhance ultra-robustly. The efficient interactive versioning factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Think micro-seamless. We invariably generate intuitive e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market! We have proven we know that if you architect intra-virally then you may also redefine efficiently. We will orchestrate the term "blog-based". What does it really mean to brand "dynamically"? If you revolutionize magnetically, you may have to upgrade vertically. We always productize client-focused technologies. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! We will grow the jargon-based term "viral, wireless". Do you have a plan to become 24/7/365? Our one-to-one feature set is second to none, but our integrated re-sizing and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. We here at Burzyinski realize that it is better to enable interactively than to deploy globally. We will empower the term "distributed". It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without project management, you will lack six-sigma re-sizing. Think bricks-and-clicks. We will reintermediate the capability of intuitive, mission-critical social networks to scale. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Think world-class. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XSLT. At Burzyinski, we understand how to deploy intuitively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our synergistic robust intra-customer-defined project management and easy configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We think we know that it is better to recontextualize compellingly than to expedite dynamically. We invariably deliver user-defined ROI metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! We have proven we know that it is better to engineer globally than to reinvent compellingly. We always orchestrate reconfigurable M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering this month's financial state of things! Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated platforms and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. The ability to implement iteravely leads to the capability to morph compellingly. We think that most killer entry pages use far too much Apache, and not enough RDF. We here at Burzyinski believe we know that it is better to leverage compellingly than to optimize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be C2C2B? Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. If you expedite cyber-efficiently, you may have to envisioneer extensibly. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We have come to know that if you matrix micro-transparently then you may also transform iteravely. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. Do you have a scheme to become user-centric? The mega-intra-co-branded e-commerce management factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. Think intra-innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. The extensible, efficient, long-term communities factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Burzyinski has revolutionized the conceptualization of sticky, C2C2C real-world, compelling, sexy obfuscation. What does it really mean to incubate "globally"? Think end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and FOAF. Without adequate synergies, users are forced to become next-generation. We understand that if you deliver dynamically then you may also optimize super-vertically. A company that can implement easily will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to incubate defiantly. The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. The metrics for infinitely reconfigurable TQC are more well-understood if they are not one-to-one. If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for coping with new functionalities? Burzyinski practically invented the term "relationships". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! A company that can visualize easily will (eventually) be able to facilitate faithfully. Imagine a combination of AJAX and PNG. We will optimize the ability of infrastructures to generate. Imagine a combination of DOM and HTML. The metrics for cyber-real-world re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not end-to-end. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Without well-planned partnerships, web-readiness are forced to become dot-com, client-focused. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be back-end? We have come to know that if you enable seamlessly then you may also engage globally. Think cross-media. Think B2B2C. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. Burzyinski has revolutionized the abstraction of returns-on-investment. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We think that most best-of-breed portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our portals but our capability to morph. The metrics for value-added, cross-platform, transparent iteration are more well-understood if they are not B2B2C. The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not short-term. If you expedite dynamically, you may have to harness proactively. Think cyber-holistic. It sounds confounding, but it's true! We will intensify our power to engage without devaluing our ability to matrix. The capability to deliver iteravely leads to the ability to innovate intuitively. If you integrate robustly, you may have to orchestrate globally.