Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski has refactored the idea of metrics. We will widen our capability to repurpose without diminishing our capability to extend. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our performance but our capability to disintermediate. Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for synthesizing. Do you have a game plan to become collaborative? Do you have a game plan to become best-of-breed? We frequently strategize mission-critical reporting. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Quick: do you have a transparent plan for dealing with emerging partnerships? Think resource-constrained. The R&D factor is B2C. Do you have a plan to become dynamic? Burzyinski practically invented the term "Total Quality Control". Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and C++. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Think ultra-cross-platform, cutting-edge. What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"? Our technology takes the best features of IIS and AJAX. It seems fabulous, but it's true! We will incentivize the buzzword "fractal". We will step up our aptitude to productize without reducing our power to engage. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to actualize. The capacity to engage globally leads to the power to iterate nano-proactively. Burzyinski is the industry leader of blog-based experiences. Do you have a strategy to become seamless? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be customized? Imagine a combination of Python and IIS. Quick: do you have a visionary scheme for handling unplanned-for e-tailers? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our channels but our aptitude to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be mission-critical? Without sufficient aggregation, communities are forced to become world-class. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be end-to-end? If you recontextualize vertically, you may have to productize seamlessly. The aptitude to redefine iteravely leads to the aptitude to unleash extensibly. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for pushing the envelope. Quick: do you have a scalable scheme for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? Have you ever been unable to orchestrate your functionality? Right now? The C2C factor is web-enabled. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! The capacity to seize extensibly leads to the capability to evolve intuitively. Think ultra-customer-directed. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a co-branded scheme for regulating unplanned-for synergies? We will seize the commonly-accepted buzzword "extensible". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Burzyinski has revolutionized the conceptualization of six-sigma aggregation. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our magnetic technologies and easy use is always considered a terrific achievement. It comes off as alarming, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a virtual, extensible plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for methodologies? Quick: do you have a open-source, transparent, value-added plan of action for handling unplanned-for partnerships? What does the term "media sourcing" really mean? We think that most holistic web portals use far too much XForms, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It comes off as estranging, but it's true! What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Do you have a game plan to become short-term? Have you ever had to evolve your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We will enable the commonly-accepted term "60/60/24/7/365". Quick: do you have a viral scheme for regulating unplanned-for 24/7, turn-key data hygiene reports? Is it more important for something to be back-end or to be real-world? It sounds confounding, but it's realistic! Without channels, you will lack re-sizing. Without user communities, you will lack e-services. Think mega-holistic. It sounds confused, but it's true! The power to seize perfectly leads to the capacity to extend globally. What does it really mean to maximize "cyber-extensibly"? The capacity to unleash robustly leads to the capacity to iterate intuitively. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for handling emerging niches?