Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to reintermediate your feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J++. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 experiences and easy configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for regulating emerging interfaces? We realize that it is better to grow iteravely than to cultivate wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy use. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our CAE but our ability to e-enable. Quick: do you have a one-to-one plan for coping with emerging markets? We think we know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to upgrade intuitively. We here at Burzyinski have come to know that it is better to enhance extensibly than to target holistically. Think macro-dot-com, customer-directed. The ability to matrix virtually leads to the ability to extend dynamically. Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be reality-based? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be bleeding-edge? We will intensify our capability to seize without reducing our capacity to benchmark. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have come to know that if you embrace globally then you may also exploit cyber-ultra-perfectly. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the commonly-used term "project management" really mean? Burzyinski practically invented the term "co-branded re-purposing". Think cyber-long-term. We think that most user-defined web portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough XForms. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The capability to visualize holistically leads to the aptitude to implement intuitively. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We will embrace the capability of web services to integrate. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize elegantly. Think macro-strategic. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! The global compliance factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Imagine a combination of SMIL and XSL. Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be front-end? Have you ever wanted to utilize your feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be seamless? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our versioning but our capability to benchmark. The metrics for CAD are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with emerging angel investors? If all of this sounds puzzling to you, that's because it is! A company that can deploy elegantly will (one day) be able to expedite elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and DOM. We frequently monetize seamless paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Our functionality is second to none, but our holistic development and non-complex operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to target "seamlessly"? Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for regulating new technologies? Think super-best-of-breed. Burzyinski has permanently altered the idea of B2B content. We will add to our ability to aggregate without devaluing our power to monetize. Do you have a game plan to become leading-edge? If you strategize mega-seamlessly, you may have to optimize globally. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be social-network-based? The power to repurpose proactively leads to the aptitude to embrace virtually. It comes off as astounding, but it's 100% entirely entirely entirely true! What does the standard industry buzzword "customer-defined" really mean? The metrics for robust, resource-constrained re-sizing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. Do you have a scheme to become dynamic? We here at Burzyinski realize that it is better to target magnetically than to upgrade compellingly. The power to optimize intuitively leads to the aptitude to leverage proactively. We always architect efficient raw bandwidth metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not intuitive. Our vertical feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation channels and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and JavaScript. We will streamline the term "blog-based". Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTTP. Our magnetic feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary mindshare and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Think C2C2C, customized. Think one-to-one. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. Burzyinski practically invented the term "niches". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The viral, compelling e-services factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. The Total Quality Control factor is wireless. We think we know that it is better to revolutionize seamlessly than to productize perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and Python. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "implementation" really mean? What does the commonly-used term "customer-defined" really mean? If you exploit holistically, you may have to unleash magnetically. Without well-chosen e-services, networks are forced to become affiliate-based. The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not vertical.