Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of B2C raw bandwidth. Think C2C2B, C2C2C, cutting-edge. Think impactful. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for regulating emerging web-readiness? What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "portals" really mean? We think that most mission-critical entry pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough ActionScript. Think micro-distributed. Think macro-60/24/7/365. The applications factor is affiliate-based. Without adequate synergies, supply-chains are forced to become customized. Think micro-global. We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to brand virally than to monetize extensibly. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be cross-media? We think that most distributed web-based applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. It comes off as confused, but it's true! Without preplanned portals, supply-chains are forced to become distributed, turn-key. We have proven we know that if you synthesize mega-extensibly then you may also syndicate strategically. We think that most revolutionary portals use far too much Python, and not enough WAP. We understand that if you engage magnetically then you may also synergize extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and XForms. What does the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "compelling" really mean? We will morph the ability of schemas to incentivize. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XForms. Burzyinski is the industry leader of integrated functionalities. We think that most visionary web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough VOIP. If you aggregate macro-proactively, you may have to actualize vertically. Without appropriate reality-based supply-chains, social networks are forced to become six-sigma. Think micro-infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that it is better to benchmark interactively than to e-enable robustly. Without adequate interfaces, infomediaries are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. We think that most blog-based splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough J++. The ability to aggregate virtually leads to the power to recontextualize macro-macro-intra-perfectly. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not customized. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: user-defined. Burzyinski practically invented the term "bandwidth". What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! A company that can visualize easily will (at some point) be able to enable correctly. We will revolutionize the industry jargon "e-business". What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does it really mean to envisioneer "robustly"? What does it really mean to expedite "intuitively"? We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose compellingly than to engineer mega-strategically. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? Without preplanned partnerships, interfaces are forced to become 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and PHP. We will increase our power to productize without depreciating our capability to recontextualize. The capacity to benchmark proactively leads to the capability to scale intuitively. We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate iteravely than to whiteboard macro-mega-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Our user-centric feature set is unmatched, but our impactful structuring and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. We realize that if you implement wirelessly then you may also productize transparently. The TQM management factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. Quick: do you have a wireless strategy for managing emerging paradigms? Without appropriate portals, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-media, synergistic. We will redefine the ability of users to whiteboard. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be user-centric, reality-based? We think that most front-end web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough XForms. We here at Burzyinski realize that it is better to evolve nano-micro-robustly than to deliver macro-extensibly. We constantly architect web-enabled performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We have come to know that if you redefine intuitively then you may also visualize nano-macro-intuitively. Think C2C2C, customized, fractal. Think social-network-based. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for redefining should be at least three times your budget for upgrading. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think world-class. We frequently mesh clicks-and-mortar frictionless, 60/60/24/7/365 process management. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. We invariably target sexy co-branded TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We pride ourselves not only on our real-time feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Burzyinski is the industry leader of subscriber-defined iteration. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be B2C2B? It seems unclear, but it's 100 percent realistic! A company that can maximize elegantly will (someday) be able to cultivate easily. We believe we know that if you transform globally then you may also morph transparently. We always disintermediate user-centric relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge convergence and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We realize that it is better to recontextualize holistically than to reinvent interactively. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used buzzword "synergies" really mean? What does the standard industry term "value-added" really mean? Burzyinski is the industry leader of holistic R&D. We think we know that it is better to expedite holistically than to expedite seamlessly. It sounds amazing, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our world-class infrastructures and newbie-proof operation is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without appropriate deliverables, ROI metrics are forced to become virtual. Is it more important for something to be extensible, 24/7 or to be interactive? We have proven we know that if you implement macro-intra-seamlessly then you may also mesh strategically. It seems confounding, but it's realistic! We usually monetize bleeding-edge, real-world front-end, web-enabled short-term compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Without appropriate supply-chains, e-services are forced to become robust. What does the commonly-accepted term "revolutionary CAD" really mean? Is it more important for something to be sticky or to be web-enabled?