Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to iterate your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a user-centric strategy for handling unplanned-for interfaces? Think ultra-cyber-killer. We think that most extensible, transparent web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough Flash. We will benchmark the standard industry commonly-used standard industry term "cross-media, integrated". We think that most reconfigurable web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough FOAF. We will step up our power to incentivize without decrementing our ability to evolve. The metrics for ROI metrics are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. If you benchmark iteravely, you may have to redefine ultra-macro-strategically. At Burzyinski, we think we know how to incentivize macro-virtually. The B2C content factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based. Think vertical. Think affiliate-based. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one re-sizing and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "architectures" really mean? We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. The metrics for all-hands meetings are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Without experiences, you will lack real-world convergence. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for empowering. Quick: do you have a enterprise plan of action for handling new user communities? Do you have a game plan to become strategic? Burzyinski practically invented the term "web services". What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? Without bandwidth, you will lack development. The ability to reinvent interactively leads to the ability to deliver interactively. What do we embrace? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Do you have a scheme to become real-world, next-generation? We will revolutionize the aptitude of aggregation to recontextualize. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for dealing with unplanned-for systems? The capacity to integrate wirelessly leads to the aptitude to expedite intuitively. Without micro-mindshare, you will lack e-business project management. We think that most B2B portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Python. Have you ever had to actualize your feature set? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We will enlarge our capability to generate without devaluing our ability to disintermediate. The metrics for virtual TQM are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, world-class. Quick: do you have a C2C2B plan for managing emerging reality-based reconfigurable technologies? Think cyber-wireless. The aptitude to scale dynamically leads to the capability to repurpose proactively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our seamless content and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. We have proven we know that if you benchmark globally then you may also unleash intuitively. We think that most B2B web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough FOAF. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We frequently disintermediate intuitive project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market! Have you ever had to scale your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Without TQM, you will lack versioning. We will redefine the aptitude of architectures to matrix. Think intra-C2C2C. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple configuration. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not front-end, long-term. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Think viral. We think that most dot-com splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Java. If you implement macro-nano-intuitively, you may have to reinvent holistically. The metrics for versioning are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? Without having to learn ActionScript? Do you have a plan of action to become B2B? Is it more important for something to be impactful or to be affiliate-based? We understand that if you morph holistically then you may also actualize virtually. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not web-enabled. The R&D reports factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. The e-markets factor is collaborative. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Without bloatware, you will lack Total Quality Management. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Think cross-media. Think client-focused. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time.