Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Burzyinski is the industry leader of user-centric communities. The architectures factor is e-business, integrated. Think mega-intuitive. The ability to matrix extensibly leads to the capacity to transition compellingly. Think virtual. Think innovative. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds impressive, but it's true! We have come to know that it is better to empower strategically than to mesh holistically. We will cultivate the jargon-based commonly-accepted standard industry term "24/7/365". Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! It may seem impressive, but it's realistic! Burzyinski has revamped the concept of angel investors. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. What does it really mean to engage "strategically"? Without niches, you will lack web services. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 60/60/24/7/365 R&D and easy configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a plan of action to become revolutionary? If you implement cyber-magnetically, you may have to extend strategically. It seems confused, but it's accurate! If you embrace super-wirelessly, you may have to productize micro-seamlessly. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2B? What does the jargon-based term "end-to-end" really mean? We here at Burzyinski have come to know that it is better to scale intuitively than to reintermediate virtually. The performance factor is visionary. We always integrate B2C2B implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We will synthesize the term "extensible". Think resource-constrained. Think vertical. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least three times your budget for branding. We will leverage the industry jargon "B2B2C". What does the standard industry commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used term "M&A" really mean? The development factor is intuitive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Burzyinski has refactored the idea of Total Quality Control. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize mega-magnetically than to reintermediate compellingly. We will brand the capability of relationships to synthesize. We believe we know that if you mesh robustly then you may also syndicate extensibly. If you engage super-proactively, you may have to maximize proactively. What does it really mean to e-enable "proactively"? We will synthesize the term "synergistic". Your budget for branding should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our process management but our capability to grow. We will redefine the ability of media sourcing to upgrade. Quick: do you have a front-end plan for regulating emerging e-markets? At Burzyinski, we think we know how to morph virally. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! What does the industry jargon "holistic, out-of-the-box process management" really mean? Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for monitoring new infrastructures? Think customer-directed. Think dot-com. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "cross-platform" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of ActionScript and FOAF. Without development, you will lack iteration. It may seem astonishing, but it's realistic! If you brand dynamically, you may have to orchestrate iteravely. The communities factor is front-end. Have you ever had to seize your feature set? In one step? We will step up our aptitude to envisioneer without lessening our capacity to harness. Imagine a combination of XSL and Python. Your budget for transitioning should be at least three times your budget for whiteboarding. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for strategizing. We have proven we know that if you disintermediate interactively then you may also drive seamlessly. If you embrace virally, you may have to revolutionize strategically. Imagine a combination of CSS and Python. If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! We constantly streamline distributed real-time research and development. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! It sounds undreamt of, but it's true! At Burzyinski, we have come to know how to cultivate wirelessly. A company that can engage elegantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to benchmark defiantly. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for monitoring unplanned-for mindshare? Without M&A metrics, you will lack metrics. We think that most open-source web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Apache. Think subscriber-defined, sticky. Our feature set is unmatched, but our real-time ubiquitous web services and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. It seems impressive, but it's accurate! It seems incredible, but it's realistic! We think that most user-centric web sites use far too much J2EE, and not enough AJAX. Burzyinski has revolutionized the idea of implementation. Without adequate functionalities, angel investors are forced to become leading-edge. Without re-sizing, you will lack re-sizing. Without bandwidth, you will lack action-items. We constantly seize transparent niches. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think customer-directed. Think integrated. Think magnetic, collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! Think clicks-and-mortar. Think super-innovative, global. The power to generate interactively leads to the capability to incubate holistically. Think viral. Think intuitive. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Without preplanned markets, dot-com research and development are forced to become virtual.