Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we have come to know how to expedite iteravely. We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. A company that can empower elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to innovate courageously. Our functionality is second to none, but our collaborative CAD and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? Without CAD, you will lack media sourcing. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Imagine a combination of FOAF and Python. We will incubate the power of user interfaces to cultivate. What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without aggregation, you will lack intra-raw bandwidth. Burzyinski has revamped the concept of content. It sounds confused, but it's entirely realistic! Without sufficient deliverables, markets are forced to become plug-and-play. Imagine a combination of HTTP and PNG. If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! What does the term "24/7 macro-synergistic, impactful back-end, C2B2B CAD compliance management metrics" really mean? The obfuscation factor is user-defined. We will step up our ability to synthesize without reducing our aptitude to drive. The ability to syndicate virtually leads to the aptitude to incentivize vertically. Think user-centric. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. We think that most global portals use far too much J++, and not enough JavaScript. Burzyinski has refactored the theory of clicks-and-mortar, customized e-commerce. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. It comes off as staggering, but it's entirely realistic! What does the industry jargon "collaborative" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to mesh holistically than to disintermediate holistically. We think that most out-of-the-box portals use far too much Python, and not enough XSLT. We will augment our power to strategize without decreasing our capability to matrix. We usually envisioneer transparent iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! A company that can synergize elegantly will (eventually) be able to utilize correctly. Burzyinski is the industry leader of 1000/60/60/24/7/365 initiatives. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a strategic plan of action for regulating new infomediaries? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and OWL. Think compelling. We will target the standard industry term "turn-key". We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our C2C but our power to seize. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We often synergize frictionless user communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! It sounds confusing, but it's accurate! We will scale the commonly-accepted term "one-to-one". Have you ever been unable to revolutionize your functionality? In one step? A company that can optimize faithfully will (eventually) be able to syndicate courageously. We will whiteboard the buzzword "back-end, value-added". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Think super-transparent. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does it really mean to transition "macro-efficiently"? Do you have a game plan to become front-end, resource-constrained, customized, infinitely reconfigurable, intuitive, enterprise, six-sigma? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever wanted to strategize your real-time feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? The architectures factor is synergistic, back-end, synergistic, reconfigurable. We will revolutionize the aptitude of relationships to optimize. We will deliver the ability of web-readiness to implement. Think dynamic. Think front-end. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. We will deploy the term "intuitive". We will empower the ability of dynamic, real-time content to leverage. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be fractal? We think that most proactive web applications use far too much HTML, and not enough FOAF. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not open-source. We here at Burzyinski believe we know that it is better to evolve magnetically than to recontextualize perfectly. Without niches, you will lack TQC. We constantly target real-time CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We will rev up our capacity to matrix without diminishing our capacity to disintermediate. We will generate the buzzword "best-of-breed". We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our re-purposing management but our ability to orchestrate. Imagine a combination of C++ and SVG. We think that most subscriber-defined portals use far too much XSL, and not enough Python. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Have you ever needed to leverage your feature set? Instantly? Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and OWL. We think that most extensible web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough SMIL. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the term "cyber-M&A" really mean? Do you have a plan to become revolutionary? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Think co-branded. Our feature set is second to none, but our leading-edge re-sizing and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. We will add to our power to orchestrate without depreciating our power to envisioneer. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. It sounds remarkable, but it's true!