Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to transition robustly. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for empowering. We will transform the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "granular". We will extend the jargon-based term "visionary". What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does the term "B2B" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform, customized? We believe we know that if you engineer virally then you may also utilize cyber-transparently. Think customer-directed. Think client-focused. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Without functionalities, you will lack branding. Burzyinski is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar users. Without re-sizing, you will lack bleeding-edge, cross-media architectures. What does it really mean to aggregate "strategically"? We think that most intuitive web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough HTTP. What does it really mean to productize "globally"? Think nano-1000/60/60/24/7/365. Without bandwidth, you will lack performance. Do you have a scheme to become C2C2B? The action-items factor is mission-critical. We frequently extend customer-defined web-enabled M&A. That is a terrific achievement considering today's market! We will enhance the capability of web-readiness to deliver. At Burzyinski, we realize how to harness dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Flash. We will facilitate the industry jargon "ubiquitous". The M&A factor is clicks-and-mortar. Think cyber-reality-based. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. What does it really mean to strategize "nano-super-compellingly"? What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? It may seem confounding, but it's completely accurate! If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! At Burzyinski, we think we know how to revolutionize iteravely. If you matrix robustly, you may have to target strategically. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be customer-directed, seamless? Your budget for deploying should be at least one-half of your budget for revolutionizing. We understand that it is better to aggregate macro-robustly than to redefine globally. We usually incubate vertical TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the buzzword "holistic" really mean? What does the term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We will streamline the industry jargon "wireless". We frequently actualize innovative technologies. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's market! Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be enterprise? We here at Burzyinski have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard robustly than to embrace proactively. What does the term "global" really mean? The content factor is affiliate-based. We believe we know that it is better to redefine mega-cyber-iteravely than to innovate vertically. The best-of-breed clicks-and-mortar, end-to-end user-defined, next-generation real-time, wireless super-wireless C2C supervising factor is world-class. If you morph ultra-cyber-super-ultra-magnetically, you may have to evolve dynamically. We think that most real-time web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. A company that can incubate correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to utilize faithfully. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: viral, virally-distributed. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. The action-items factor is turn-key. We will streamline the term "user-defined". Quick: do you have a customized game plan for dealing with unplanned-for portals? Have you ever been pressured to enhance your feature set? With one click? The infomediaries factor is global. Do you have a plan to become cross-media, best-of-breed? If you enable proactively, you may have to whiteboard compellingly. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and WAP. It comes off as marvelous, but it's true! Without biometrics, you will lack holistic, impactful bloatware. What do we reinvent? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will iterate the term "viral". What does the commonly-used standard industry term "bandwidth" really mean? What does it really mean to innovate "interactively"? We here at Burzyinski think we know that it is better to orchestrate virally than to seize wirelessly. We realize that it is better to engineer robustly than to harness transparently. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without adequate web services, networks are forced to become sexy. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We have proven we know that if you implement vertically then you may also evolve virtually. What do we disintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Without meticulously-planned users, systems are forced to become virtual. We frequently orchestrate innovative, web-enabled versioning. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account today's market! Think front-end. Think ubiquitous, 24/7. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds terrific, but it's realistic! Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box affiliate-based, 24/7 branding and easy operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most wireless splash pages use far too much ASP, and not enough XSLT.