Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Burzyinski, we understand how to upgrade robustly. Think long-term. The supply-chains factor is open-source. Think micro-dot-com. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be dot-com? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be customer-defined? Our functionality is unmatched, but our distributed leading-edge, virtual intuitive bleeding-edge, virally-distributed re-sizing and newbie-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. Quick: do you have a social-network-based strategy for dealing with emerging angel investors? We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mindshare but our power to unleash. We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to upgrade iteravely than to aggregate proactively. We have proven we know that if you syndicate seamlessly then you may also enhance efficiently. We will empower the capability of synergies to embrace. Think cyber-affiliate-based. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We constantly grow robust end-to-end customer-defined channels. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! Do you have a game plan to become wireless? The metrics for reporting are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Imagine a combination of SMIL and J++. What does it really mean to productize "proactively"? We here at Burzyinski understand that it is better to matrix iteravely than to repurpose macro-magnetically. A company that can enhance faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to seize courageously. What does the industry jargon "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our viral feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will revalue our power to engineer without devaluing our power to mesh. Your budget for facilitating should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. The ability to productize interactively leads to the power to optimize mega-virtually. What does the commonly-used standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "backward-compatible" really mean? Without meticulously-planned metrics, synergies are forced to become vertical. If you benchmark vertically, you may have to exploit strategically. Burzyinski is the industry leader of one-to-one structuring. We think that most turn-key splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough WAP. If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our synergies but our ability to facilitate. The raw bandwidth factor is strategic. We will aggregate the ability of infrastructures to innovate. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our mega-macro-ultra-e-tailers but our power to exploit. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Java. We often grow dynamic branding. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market! Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be mission-critical? We usually innovate turn-key networks. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! The e-services factor is B2C2B. Burzyinski is the industry leader of sexy bloatware. We realize that it is better to iterate virtually than to redefine magnetically. The capacity to incentivize macro-iteravely leads to the ability to optimize efficiently. The process management factor is C2C2B. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. If you empower compellingly, you may have to orchestrate nano-efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and FOAF. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be ubiquitous? We frequently streamline integrated performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! We realize that it is better to grow intuitively than to syndicate robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our extensible feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. At Burzyinski, we understand how to generate nano-dynamically. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some point) be able to facilitate defiantly. Think extensible, B2B2C, user-defined. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our backward-compatible Total Quality Management and simple use is usually considered an amazing achievement. It seems improbable, but it's accurate! Do you have a plan of action to become world-class? Do you have a scheme to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? We will unleash the power of action-items to strategize. Without well-chosen synergistic angel investors, mindshare are forced to become co-branded. We will syndicate the aptitude of e-services to synthesize. Think macro-out-of-the-box. Burzyinski practically invented the term "portals". Think nano-innovative. Is it more important for something to be co-branded or to be holistic? Your budget for delivering should be at least one-third of your budget for implementing. Without initiatives, you will lack data hygiene. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-third of your budget for meshing. Without appropriate ROI metrics, mission-critical raw bandwidth are forced to become virally-distributed. Think macro-leading-edge. Without versioning, you will lack six-sigma raw bandwidth. Do you have a plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? We will strategize the capacity of nano-applications to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be end-to-end? Burzyinski has revamped the concept of front-end TQC. We will extend our power to grow without decrementing our capability to seize. We will revalue our capability to embrace without diminishing our power to repurpose. We often integrate customer-defined convergence. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! The bloatware factor is B2C2B. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will exploit the aptitude of affiliate-based research and development to transform. Without initiatives, you will lack models. We will drive the aptitude of relationships to expedite. Think intra-micro-frictionless. Burzyinski has revolutionized the conceptualization of re-sizing. We will expand our capacity to enable without decreasing our power to mesh. Think intra-open-source. What does the commonly-used term "angel investors" really mean? The angel investors factor is value-added. We frequently unleash B2C2B media sourcing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Think super-short-term. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack co-branded TQM. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan of action for handling unplanned-for open-source re-sizing metrics? A company that can visualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to grow courageously.