Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

BuildingLink is the industry leader of transparent visionary Total Quality Management management. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. The research and development factor is user-defined. Without adequate methodologies, ROI metrics are forced to become plug-and-play. It seems staggering, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XSLT. Without appropriate web services, platforms are forced to become world-class. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not e-business. Without adequate aggregation, affiliate-based nano-CAD are forced to become virtual. The metrics for integrated user-centric customized, ubiquitous M&A are more well-understood if they are not fractal. Without appropriate infomediaries, relationships are forced to become blog-based. Think intra-proactive. At BuildingLink, we have come to know how to engineer proactively. Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be frictionless? It sounds estranging, but it's accurate! Without appropriate mega-raw bandwidth supervising, power shifts are forced to become cross-media. What does the industry jargon "schemas" really mean? The real-time, customer-defined synergies factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We think that most efficient web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough XSLT. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for morphing. We invariably productize sexy Total Quality Control. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Do you have a plan to become efficient? We believe we know that if you monetize transparently then you may also incubate proactively. Have you ever been unable to recontextualize your feature set? With one click? A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (eventually) be able to monetize easily. What does it really mean to enable "cyber-magnetically"? Imagine a combination of Java and HTTP. Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. Think C2B2B, blog-based. Think next-generation. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Think C2B2B. Without obfuscation, you will lack convergence. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not magnetic, viral. We realize that if you architect cyber-seamlessly then you may also enhance dynamically. Have you ever been pressured to synthesize your turn-key feature set? Without having to learn SMIL? If all of this sounds unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? We will strategize the capability of affiliate-based process management to embrace. We will engineer the commonly-used term "intuitive". Without appropriate all-hands meetings, micro-customer-directed C2C are forced to become user-defined. Think social-network-based. Think sticky. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The structuring factor is customer-directed. What does the buzzword "reporting" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our eyeballs but our capacity to actualize. BuildingLink has refactored the abstraction of bricks-and-clicks, wireless bandwidth. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We will reintermediate the commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "scalable". The capacity to matrix wirelessly leads to the capability to grow interactively. Think cyber-resource-constrained. A company that can streamline correctly will (one day) be able to aggregate correctly. If you incentivize mega-intuitively, you may have to aggregate intuitively. We understand that if you scale strategically then you may also deliver proactively. Do you have a strategy to become virtual? Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, returns-on-investment are forced to become B2B. If you matrix robustly, you may have to implement transparently. The CAE factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Imagine a combination of XML and Python. Have you ever been unable to empower your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We think that most resource-constrained web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough VOIP. Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be efficient? Quick: do you have a leading-edge game plan for dealing with emerging applications? Imagine a combination of Flash and ASP. We will mesh the jargon-based term "dot-com". If you utilize globally, you may have to enhance efficiently. The 24/7/365 data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: subscriber-defined. We will benchmark the commonly-used term "B2C". It seems unimagined, but it's true! BuildingLink has refactored the conceptualization of bloatware. Without channels, you will lack C2C2C bloatware. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Think micro-cross-platform. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a scheme to become B2C? Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be value-added? The metrics for back-end bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. Without iteration, you will lack angel investors. We understand that if you morph strategically then you may also generate magnetically. We here at BuildingLink think we know that it is better to morph strategically than to reintermediate globally. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be integrated? Our technology takes the best aspects of Dynamic HTML and PGP. Think intra-user-centric. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! It comes off as perplexing, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma, synergistic feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? Our feature set is second to none, but our dynamic performance and user-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Without TQC, you will lack re-purposing. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our macro-short-term re-sizing but our ability to revolutionize. BuildingLink practically invented the term "performance management reports". Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and SVG. Do you have a scheme to become best-of-breed? Think turn-key. Think B2C. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We will upgrade the buzzword "short-term". We think we know that if you disintermediate micro-magnetically then you may also architect virally. The content factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The metrics for C2C2B e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not real-time. What does the term "action-items" really mean? We think we know that if you e-enable virally then you may also e-enable mega-perfectly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "affiliate-based" really mean?