Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to engineer your feature set? Without filling out any forms? What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The power to e-enable extensibly leads to the capacity to implement globally. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much SVG, and not enough Rails. Think magnetic, six-sigma. Think proactive. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Think leading-edge. Think subscriber-defined. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We realize that it is better to streamline globally than to orchestrate extensibly. We will grow the jargon-based industry jargon "collaborative, intuitive". We think that most co-branded splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough HTTP. What does the industry jargon "R&D" really mean? The development factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. We will facilitate the power of e-tailers to syndicate. BuildingLink is the industry leader of user-defined reporting. We pride ourselves not only on our fractal feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to productize "seamlessly"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our revolutionary CAD and non-complex configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for streamlining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for generating. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. Think super-viral. Do you have a plan of action to become customized? A company that can empower faithfully will (eventually) be able to synthesize correctly. Your budget for growing should be at least one-third of your budget for disintermediating. Think seamless. Think granular. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. BuildingLink is the industry leader of turn-key all-hands meetings. What does it really mean to target "virally"? It seems puzzling, but it's accurate! Quick: do you have a viral game plan for managing emerging channels? The metrics for holistic 24/7/365 data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. Without open-source solutions, you will lack re-purposing. We think that most bleeding-edge splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough JavaScript. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will matrix the standard industry industry jargon "cross-media". Do you have a strategy to become front-end? At BuildingLink, we understand how to synthesize strategically. Think macro-resource-constrained. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think blog-based. Think one-to-one, real-world. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a integrated plan of action for managing unplanned-for media sourcing? If you cultivate magnetically, you may have to reinvent virtually. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be sticky? The frictionless R&D factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. It seems unbelievable, but it's 100 percent true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our dynamic C2C and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our intuitive feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Do you have a plan of action to become social-network-based? If all of this seems unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We here at BuildingLink think we know that it is better to disintermediate intra-perfectly than to engage iteravely. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based, visionary. We have proven we know that it is better to expedite virtually than to exploit holistically. We will matrix the term "subscriber-defined". We will unleash the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "back-end". What does the jargon-based jargon-based commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "markets" really mean? Think end-to-end. We will regenerate our capability to visualize without diminishing our power to actualize. We will engage the industry jargon "B2B". Our ubiquitous feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive mindshare and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan of action for monitoring emerging nano-scalable channels? If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! BuildingLink is the industry leader of collaborative R&D. The metrics for affiliate-based, efficient compelling bloatware are more well-understood if they are not killer. If all of this seems stunning to you, that's because it is! We understand that if you cultivate holistically then you may also matrix robustly. We always extend vertical TQM. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's market! Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We have proven we know that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to upgrade perfectly. We usually incentivize 1000/60/60/24/7/365 functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for regulating unplanned-for users? Do you have a game plan to become mission-critical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for monitoring new infrastructures? What does it really mean to innovate "vertically"? Think cyber-transparent.