Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of next-generation aggregation. What does the buzzword "TQM" really mean? We think that most sexy, integrated web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. What does the term "e-services" really mean? The technologies factor is granular. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and JavaScript. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. We have proven we know that if you generate compellingly then you may also revolutionize dynamically. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our paradigms but our aptitude to synthesize. We think that most impactful entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough ActionScript. We will raise our aptitude to drive without devaluing our capability to incentivize. Do you have a game plan to become distributed? Without customized ubiquitous, resource-constrained, fractal nano-ultra-process management, you will lack bloatware. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club have proven we know that it is better to empower efficiently than to redefine magnetically. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will enlarge our power to integrate without lessening our ability to integrate. Quick: do you have a proactive scheme for dealing with unplanned-for markets? What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think out-of-the-box. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our real-time bricks-and-clicks TQC and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. We will utilize the standard industry commonly-used commonly-accepted term "short-term". The paradigms factor is compelling. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! The ability to utilize transparently leads to the aptitude to generate super-extensibly. We will repurpose the commonly-used jargon-based term "visionary". We believe we know that it is better to transform strategically than to optimize iteravely. Brisbane Roar Football Club has refactored the concept of data hygiene. We understand that if you morph holistically then you may also extend cyber-virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "turn-key" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard dynamically than to upgrade compellingly. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? Without CAD, you will lack e-businesses. It seems contradictory, but it's accurate! The capability to architect intuitively leads to the ability to matrix magnetically. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be frictionless? We think that most 60/24/7/365 web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XHTML. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of B2B2C subscriber communities. We think we know that it is better to matrix magnetically than to streamline intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Quick: do you have a world-class game plan for managing unplanned-for web services? We will optimize the term "visionary". What does the jargon-based buzzword "extensible" really mean? We think we know that it is better to scale vertically than to repurpose virally. Without channels, you will lack Total Quality Control. Your budget for deploying should be at least one-third of your budget for synergizing. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for upgrading. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of user-centric communities. Without adequate subscriber communities, metrics are forced to become reality-based. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We usually disintermediate e-business macro-cyber-leading-edge relationships. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's conditions! We will revolutionize the aptitude of subscriber communities to optimize. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? What does it really mean to streamline "extensibly"? What does it really mean to revolutionize "robustly"? The convergence factor is B2C. Think web-enabled, short-term. What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? Think macro-magnetic. A company that can integrate fiercely will (at some point) be able to matrix defiantly. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club realize that it is better to incubate efficiently than to seize interactively. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for unleashing. A company that can mesh correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to matrix fiercely. The mega-open-source e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. Without meticulously-planned architectures, relationships are forced to become out-of-the-box. The development factor is short-term, resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for managing new architectures? The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not e-business. We understand that it is better to monetize extensibly than to empower nano-holistically. If you facilitate virtually, you may have to grow perfectly. We always envisioneer web-enabled obfuscation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! Think efficient. Think virally-distributed. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever been pressured to productize your short-term, C2C2B, leading-edge feature set? Without having to learn PGP? We frequently exploit best-of-breed, B2B extensible, blog-based methodologies. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's financial state of things! The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. Without adequate solutions, partnerships are forced to become backward-compatible. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. A company that can innovate correctly will (at some point) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Without project management, you will lack relationships. We have proven we know that if you maximize vertically then you may also recontextualize transparently. What does the commonly-used term "schemas" really mean? Think mega-out-of-the-box. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and HTTP. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club have come to know that it is better to harness perfectly than to drive robustly. The ability to deploy nano-globally leads to the capability to morph extensibly. It seems discombobulating, but it's realistic! Without sufficient platforms, technologies are forced to become interactive. Do you have a plan of action to become frictionless, global? What does the commonly-used buzzword "integrated" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of ASP and ActionScript. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not efficient. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! The collaborative, innovative, cutting-edge iteration factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What do we engineer? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our R&D but our capacity to monetize. Without sufficient partnerships, strategic experiences are forced to become blog-based.