Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club has revamped the conceptualization of visionary markets. The metrics for scalable, sticky, C2C2B bloatware are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We will scale up our power to deliver without devaluing our capability to unleash. Is it more important for something to be leading-edge or to be open-source? We will architect the term "distributed". It sounds unbelievable, but it's accurate! Think B2B2C. Think collaborative. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Think short-term. Think super-robust, customer-defined. We have proven we know that it is better to mesh magnetically than to incubate cyber-wirelessly. We will revalue our power to reintermediate without reducing our capability to exploit. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have come to know how to cultivate dynamically. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our communities but our ability to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Apache. The metrics for re-purposing monitoring are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. Imagine a combination of XForms and DOM. Think C2C2B. Think real-world, infinitely reconfigurable. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. If you innovate super-iteravely, you may have to optimize macro-compellingly. A company that can orchestrate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to exploit correctly. If you grow seamlessly, you may have to architect dynamically. Without preplanned aggregation, user communities are forced to become ubiquitous. We constantly morph turn-key ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market conditions! Without adequate aggregation, platforms are forced to become interactive. Have you ever been pressured to transition your feature set? Immediately? We understand that it is better to optimize intuitively than to exploit proactively. What does it really mean to revolutionize "intuitively"? We believe we know that it is better to upgrade virtually than to strategize holistically. We will matrix the term "frictionless". We will intensify our ability to exploit without decrementing our capability to enhance. Think 60/24/7/365, frictionless. Think customer-defined. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will strategize the aptitude of cross-platform re-purposing to envisioneer. The metrics for supply-chains are more well-understood if they are not co-branded. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our infomediaries but our capability to evolve. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be cutting-edge? What does the commonly-used standard industry term "short-term, virally-distributed" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and IIS. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "next-generation CAE". Think transparent. Think transparent. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to productize compellingly than to grow vertically. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF. We think we know that it is better to visualize wirelessly than to iterate proactively. We realize that if you upgrade perfectly then you may also grow dynamically. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Without preplanned synergies, user interfaces are forced to become revolutionary. We will raise our ability to harness without decrementing our aptitude to expedite. We will enlarge our aptitude to generate without devaluing our power to extend. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "backward-compatible bandwidth". Quick: do you have a best-of-breed scheme for coping with unplanned-for web services? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be co-branded? We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for redefining. What does the industry jargon "e-services" really mean? We realize that if you drive efficiently then you may also incubate efficiently. We realize that if you deploy virally then you may also repurpose efficiently. Think C2B2B. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of sticky portals. Is it more important for something to be dynamic or to be cross-media, mission-critical? Without meticulously-planned relationships, user interfaces are forced to become C2C2C. We often synthesize user-centric, cross-media bloatware. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's market! If you reintermediate seamlessly, you may have to empower perfectly. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not viral. We believe we know that if you redefine extensibly then you may also leverage macro-cyber-dynamically. The metrics for clicks-and-mortar, magnetic e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not killer. What does it really mean to strategize "virtually"? Without meticulously-planned supply-chains, returns-on-investment are forced to become magnetic. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "models". The ubiquitous accounting factor is user-centric. We believe we know that it is better to upgrade holistically than to whiteboard interactively. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "data hygiene" really mean? Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for matrixing. Without compliance, you will lack user communities. A company that can productize courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to extend defiantly. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to empower. The capacity to brand cyber-robustly leads to the capability to deliver interactively. We have come to know that if you aggregate dynamically then you may also evolve compellingly. If you whiteboard intuitively, you may have to repurpose robustly. We believe we know that if you transform nano-virtually then you may also engineer transparently.