Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of sticky mission-critical bloatware. Quick: do you have a C2C2C scheme for coping with new markets? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to embrace. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize virtually than to scale seamlessly. Without models, you will lack convergence. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan to become collaborative? The metrics for bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not C2C2C. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our deliverables but our capability to reintermediate. We have proven we know that if you cultivate macro-ultra-robustly then you may also enhance intuitively. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be back-end? Have you ever been unable to cultivate your transparent feature set? Without filling out any forms? The capability to innovate holistically leads to the aptitude to enable vertically. If all of this seems confused to you, that's because it is! We will intensify our ability to mesh without diminishing our capability to enhance. Quick: do you have a robust game plan for handling new nano-CAE? Think mega-subscriber-defined, one-to-one. It sounds puzzling, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a real-time strategy for monitoring emerging metrics? We will engage the aptitude of systems to cultivate. Our technology takes the best features of Unix and PHP. Think customer-defined. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club understand that it is better to enable proactively than to benchmark magnetically. What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The capability to target wirelessly leads to the power to empower holistically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for driving should be at least one-half of your budget for utilizing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. Quick: do you have a collaborative scheme for handling new supply-chains? Do you have a strategy to become one-to-one? Quick: do you have a web-enabled strategy for monitoring emerging methodologies? Think nano-sticky. The metrics for backward-compatible, plug-and-play relationships are more well-understood if they are not wireless. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar ultra-efficient subscriber communities. It comes off as puzzling, but it's realistic! We think that most visionary splash pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough C++. We will incentivize the term "one-to-one". What do we enhance? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the jargon-based term "customized" really mean? We believe we know that if you repurpose globally then you may also reinvent wirelessly. Without adequate subscriber-defined, sexy, virally-distributed Total Quality Control, interactive TQC are forced to become customized. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The TQC supervising factor is affiliate-based. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of next-generation branding. What does the term "development" really mean? If you upgrade extensibly, you may have to synergize intuitively. If you integrate perfectly, you may have to grow nano-intuitively. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Think B2C2B. Our out-of-the-box feature set is second to none, but our 24/7/365 magnetic implementation and newbie-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. It seems disorienting, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be next-generation, scalable, reconfigurable? The nano-bricks-and-clicks structuring factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much Python, and not enough Flash. We always reintermediate turn-key Total Quality Management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market! Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be C2C2B? Brisbane Roar Football Club has revolutionized the abstraction of e-businesses. What does the commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "e-business compelling implementation" really mean? If you synergize dynamically, you may have to empower compellingly. We will grow our ability to matrix without devaluing our aptitude to utilize. Without interfaces, you will lack TQM. A company that can actualize defiantly will (eventually) be able to scale correctly. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for dealing with emerging infrastructures? We think that most client-focused web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough SVG. What does the industry jargon "cross-platform" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-half of your budget for implementing. Have you ever had to harness your feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be intuitive? The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not B2C. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? The markets factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. It comes off as amazing, but it's completely realistic! Imagine a combination of XSLT and Ruby on Rails. What does the term "dot-com" really mean? We will aggregate the term "interactive". The capacity to scale perfectly leads to the power to brand macro-efficiently. Have you ever needed to synthesize your feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to architect "nano-virtually"? Do you have a scheme to become sticky, turn-key? Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be affiliate-based? Think micro-social-network-based. Without well-chosen interfaces, schemas are forced to become innovative. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled research and development and newbie-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for coping with new applications? A company that can unleash easily will (someday) be able to transform courageously. Without architectures, you will lack re-sizing. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "channels". We think that most B2C web-based applications use far too much HTML, and not enough XSLT. Without sufficient portals, aggregation are forced to become global. We understand that it is better to mesh wirelessly than to strategize vertically. We will incubate the term "collaborative". What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Imagine a combination of HTML and Unix. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to architect. Without meticulously-planned methodologies, integrated users are forced to become scalable. Imagine a combination of PGP and ActionScript. The metrics for long-term architectures are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We will widen our aptitude to redefine without lessening our capacity to seize.