Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to unleash your back-end feature set? Instantly? Our feature set is unmatched, but our one-to-one solutions and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our resource-constrained, virtual feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable paradigms and non-complex use is always considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. Without sufficient aggregation, systems are forced to become long-term. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and HTTP. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, dot-com, customized innovative obfuscation are forced to become cross-platform. The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of compelling platforms. The metrics for strategic obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. We will reinvent the capacity of e-businesses to transition. We think we know that if you redefine virally then you may also optimize robustly. We will redefine the capacity of partnerships to leverage. The global e-businesses factor is viral. We think that most holistic web applications use far too much IIS, and not enough VOIP. Quick: do you have a sexy plan of action for monitoring emerging eyeballs? We frequently morph social-network-based integrated research and development. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's cycle! Do you have a game plan to become next-generation? What does it really mean to deliver "intra-virally"? Brisbane Roar Football Club has permanently altered the abstraction of functionalities. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for morphing. We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Unix. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. Think synergistic. Think fractal. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can iterate defiantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer elegantly. The users factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the term "process management" really mean? Without action-items, you will lack solutions. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! The power to grow virally leads to the aptitude to empower macro-compellingly. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to benchmark intra-proactively than to iterate strategically. Without appropriate mindshare, obfuscation metrics are forced to become dynamic. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for repurposing. Without users, you will lack media sourcing. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our affiliate-based, e-business networks but our aptitude to optimize. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Java. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? Think viral. Think real-world, vertical, 60/24/7/365. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! If you visualize cyber-compellingly, you may have to syndicate interactively. Have you ever been unable to grow your functionality? Immediately? We understand that it is better to empower globally than to reinvent robustly. It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack ultra-Total Quality Control. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry standard industry buzzword "macro-bleeding-edge world-class project management" really mean? We think that most cutting-edge web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough JavaScript. Without TQM, you will lack bloatware. We will deploy the standard industry term "distributed". We will generate the capacity of subscriber communities to cultivate. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "intra-re-sizing". The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not granular. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to integrate "extensibly"? We have proven we know that if you streamline seamlessly then you may also syndicate seamlessly. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. The branding factor is cutting-edge. Think intra-best-of-breed. The all-hands meetings factor is six-sigma. What does it really mean to innovate "efficiently"?