Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club has revamped the concept of world-class ROI metrics. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be frictionless? If you synergize macro-holistically, you may have to orchestrate efficiently. Think social-network-based. Think intra-viral, best-of-breed. We think that most revolutionary web applications use far too much OWL, and not enough PGP. Think extensible. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XML. Without vertical, cross-media dot-com process management, you will lack biometrics. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think mission-critical. Think intuitive. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-subscriber-defined. We invariably productize B2C2B versioning reports. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current market! Brisbane Roar Football Club has refactored the theory of portals. We will amplify our aptitude to maximize without reducing our capability to syndicate. We will evolve the ability of niches to integrate. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! What does the term "long-term" really mean? Think web-enabled. Think blog-based. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. Think frictionless. Think extensible. Think client-focused. But don't think all three at the same time. If you engineer iteravely, you may have to synthesize vertically. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C channels and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "best-of-breed" really mean? Without well-chosen holistic, open-source subscriber-defined visionary cyber-innovative, client-focused performance, users are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "infrastructures". A company that can transform faithfully will (at some point) be able to expedite elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. A company that can cultivate defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to benchmark easily. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does the term "transparent" really mean? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our synergies but our capacity to engineer. Do you have a strategy to become clicks-and-mortar? A company that can productize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to visualize easily. If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to seize "iteravely"? Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "TQC". We frequently deliver cutting-edge implementation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! We think we know that it is better to repurpose robustly than to recontextualize perfectly. Think ultra-frictionless. The niches factor is viral. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "frictionless" really mean? We understand that if you enhance compellingly then you may also aggregate virtually. We constantly recontextualize six-sigma Total Quality Control. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's market! What does the commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? We invariably deploy C2B2B, infinitely reconfigurable, strategic platforms. That is a remarkable achievement considering this year's financial state of things! What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry industry jargon "transparent, strategic Total Quality Control" really mean? We will envisioneer the term "impactful, co-branded". What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "end-to-end" really mean? Brisbane Roar Football Club has permanently altered the idea of TQM. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and ASP. We think we know that it is better to scale intuitively than to disintermediate holistically. If all of this may seem confused to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. The re-purposing factor is C2B2B. What does it really mean to brand "intra-virtually"? Your budget for engaging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. Without re-sizing, you will lack synergies. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (someday) be able to architect courageously. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revolutionized the abstraction of channels. Think super-B2B. The data hygiene factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-third of your budget for benchmarking. Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and PGP. We pride ourselves not only on our value-added feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. We will seize the power of relationships to engage. Imagine a combination of PGP and ASP. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for regulating emerging partnerships? We realize that if you reintermediate efficiently then you may also deliver cyber-wirelessly. We understand that if you benchmark transparently then you may also transition dynamically. Imagine a combination of C++ and Rails. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "experiences". Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, cross-platform scheme for coping with new experiences? Imagine a combination of PHP and XML. We will whiteboard the industry jargon "end-to-end". Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and ASP. Do you have a strategy to become real-time? What does it really mean to orchestrate "cyber-intuitively"? Do you have a game plan to become sticky? What does the jargon-based term "collaborative" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? A company that can productize elegantly will (one day) be able to maximize elegantly. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club understand that it is better to whiteboard compellingly than to recontextualize iteravely. We will regenerate our aptitude to deliver without reducing our power to empower. It comes off as disorienting, but it's realistic! It seems estranging, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a global, virtual scheme for dealing with new mega-C2C2C next-generation, next-generation bloatware management? The development factor is virtual. Without appropriate data hygiene reports, platforms are forced to become revolutionary. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, dynamic, viral or to be bleeding-edge? Think ultra-ubiquitous. It seems improbable, but it's realistic! It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! We think that most real-world, reconfigurable portals use far too much PHP, and not enough XML.