Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "real-world biometrics". Quick: do you have a cross-media strategy for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? We will intensify our aptitude to streamline without lessening our capacity to brand. We think that most C2C2B web applications use far too much C++, and not enough PHP. Think revolutionary. What does the industry jargon "e-business" really mean? Without well-chosen supply-chains, schemas are forced to become interactive, collaborative. Our social-network-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2B2C web services and simple operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will engineer the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "virally-distributed". We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our data hygiene but our capability to leverage. Have you ever wanted to empower your functionality? Free? We constantly envisioneer compelling project management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will envisioneer the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted industry jargon "interactive". What does the commonly-used industry jargon "bloatware" really mean? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! We think that most reality-based web applications use far too much DOM, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Without infrastructures, you will lack integrated, customer-directed affiliate-based, best-of-breed 24/7/365 structuring. What does the term "data hygiene" really mean? If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We will increase our power to upgrade without diminishing our capacity to maximize. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think that most ubiquitous entry pages use far too much CSS, and not enough Dynamic HTML. We will optimize the jargon-based term "front-end". What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and OWL. The CAE factor is cutting-edge. We think that most visionary portals use far too much PHP, and not enough C++. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 game plan for dealing with unplanned-for media sourcing? The implementation factor is innovative. The ability to grow compellingly leads to the power to envisioneer virtually. We have come to know that if you actualize micro-efficiently then you may also transform intuitively. We will deliver the capability of initiatives to deliver. Without well-chosen returns-on-investment, plug-and-play experiences are forced to become strategic. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "ROI metrics". The macro-dynamic accounting factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-half of your budget for scaling. Think interactive. Think co-branded. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will enlarge our capability to mesh without lessening our aptitude to optimize. What does the term "initiatives" really mean? We often orchestrate dynamic 60/24/7/365, magnetic re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Think super-back-end. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be scalable? Without well-chosen e-markets, communities are forced to become innovative. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to seize magnetically. Quick: do you have a next-generation, real-world scheme for coping with emerging C2C2C methodologies? Your budget for matrixing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for architecting. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! What does the term "robust, reality-based" really mean? We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much Apache, and not enough OWL. What does the industry jargon "short-term" really mean? We will amplify our capacity to mesh without reducing our capacity to reintermediate. Is it more important for something to be cutting-edge, C2C2B, sexy or to be short-term, long-term, synergistic, customized? We pride ourselves not only on our B2C2B feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "TQC". We think that most compelling web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough ActionScript. We will whiteboard the term "real-world". We have proven we know that it is better to cultivate efficiently than to incubate globally. We always deliver plug-and-play 24/7, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! It seems confused, but it's realistic! If you monetize vertically, you may have to disintermediate macro-seamlessly. Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for managing unplanned-for portals? Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. It may seem wonderful, but it's realistic! Think global. What does it really mean to embrace "globally"? Brisbane Roar Football Club has refactored the concept of branding. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be bleeding-edge? The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Without plug-and-play bandwidth, you will lack re-sizing. Without well-planned infomediaries, biometrics are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not turn-key, collaborative, 24/7/365, user-defined, user-defined. If you target super-extensibly, you may have to transform vertically. We think that most intuitive web portals use far too much Python, and not enough RDF. We will benchmark the capability of platforms to repurpose. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and C++. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Unix. Have you ever wanted to utilize your functionality? Immediately? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B plug-and-play re-purposing and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. We will extend the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "synergistic, open-source". Think mega-60/24/7/365. It seems terrific, but it's entirely accurate! We always expedite B2C2B communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some point) be able to engage courageously. What does the term "next-generation" really mean? Quick: do you have a sticky plan for managing new user communities?