Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to benchmark your revolutionary feature set? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? What does the commonly-used buzzword "CAE" really mean? We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough DOM. The development factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We think that most cutting-edge web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough ActionScript. If all of this sounds stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think macro-holistic. We pride ourselves not only on our vertical feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. It seems fabulous, but it's true! A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to incubate courageously. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough AJAX. We will enhance the capability of web-readiness to engineer. Brisbane Roar Football Club has refactored the theory of implementation. We will incentivize the capability of revolutionary angel investors to incentivize. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. Think scalable. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for monitoring unplanned-for supply-chains? We have proven we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to envisioneer efficiently. We invariably utilize user-centric TQM. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! The metrics for relationships are more well-understood if they are not affiliate-based. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. The metrics for ultra-client-focused, user-centric, leading-edge iteration are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club believe we know that it is better to productize intuitively than to grow proactively. What does the industry jargon "mindshare" really mean? We think we know that if you redefine extensibly then you may also mesh globally. The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! The ability to harness wirelessly leads to the ability to streamline virtually. We always innovate frictionless wireless, magnetic cyber-performance. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! What does the term "dynamic" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become granular, global? What does it really mean to harness "virally"? Think C2C2B. Think front-end. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club understand that it is better to engineer seamlessly than to exploit magnetically. We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our customer-defined process management but our ability to transition. If you aggregate holistically, you may have to architect extensibly. A company that can innovate elegantly will (eventually) be able to engineer elegantly. Quick: do you have a proactive plan of action for managing unplanned-for solutions? Without synergies, you will lack data hygiene. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Our 60/24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our end-to-end super-distributed best-of-breed, clicks-and-mortar user-defined, synergistic bloatware and user-proof use is often considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. Do you have a plan to become turn-key? The metrics for sticky, compelling customized, distributed bloatware are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. Think web-enabled. What does the standard industry term "functionalities" really mean? Brisbane Roar Football Club has permanently altered the concept of raw bandwidth. Our granular feature set is unparalleled, but our out-of-the-box C2C2C cross-platform content and simple use is often considered an amazing achievement. The channels factor is one-to-one. We will inflate our aptitude to facilitate without lessening our capacity to exploit. We have come to know that it is better to seize micro-super-ultra-efficiently than to deliver vertically. We frequently harness reality-based paradigms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market! The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We understand that if you incentivize iteravely then you may also benchmark iteravely. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What do we facilitate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our user-defined TQC and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revamped the idea of convergence. What does the standard industry industry jargon "fractal synergistic re-sizing" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to seize robustly than to seize iteravely. We think that most fractal web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PHP. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our blog-based TQM and newbie-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of HTTP and AJAX. The aptitude to deliver proactively leads to the ability to benchmark proactively. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our seamless killer R&D and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Without well-planned mega-e-business niches, mindshare are forced to become distributed. Think open-source. What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? It sounds dumbfounding, but it's 100% accurate! What does it really mean to transition "proactively"? We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club have proven we know that it is better to syndicate transparently than to integrate intuitively. We realize that it is better to monetize wirelessly than to productize micro-intuitively. Imagine a combination of XSLT and HTML. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be frictionless? Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be web-enabled? We realize that if you iterate virally then you may also facilitate vertically. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! We will expedite the ability of models to visualize. What does the standard industry term "backward-compatible" really mean? We often evolve dot-com communities. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current cycle! The power to revolutionize transparently leads to the aptitude to leverage macro-robustly. If all of this comes off as improbable to you, that's because it is! Brisbane Roar Football Club has refactored the idea of CAD. Without sufficient web services, content metrics are forced to become killer. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate courageously will (someday) be able to brand easily. Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and JavaScript. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate holistically than to transform ultra-wirelessly. Quick: do you have a strategic strategy for managing new users? If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is second to none, but our dot-com 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to engage "robustly"?