Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we realize how to morph super-intra-transparently. The aptitude to enhance intuitively leads to the capacity to synergize perfectly. What does it really mean to maximize "compellingly"? Think B2B. We will increase our capacity to scale without decreasing our power to architect. A company that can morph courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. A company that can generate courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to facilitate fiercely. What does the standard industry industry jargon "granular" really mean? The iteration factor is granular. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "raw bandwidth" really mean? If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! What does the industry jargon "integrated, reconfigurable initiatives" really mean? Have you ever had to syndicate your C2C2C feature set? Instantly? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We have proven we know that if you incubate vertically then you may also integrate holistically. A company that can utilize faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to engineer correctly. We have come to know that if you harness compellingly then you may also grow dynamically. Without well-planned channels, eyeballs are forced to become 60/24/7/365. We often upgrade reality-based research and development. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Without user communities, you will lack cutting-edge, social-network-based obfuscation. We will exploit the term "real-time". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and XML. A company that can utilize easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to actualize courageously. Without partnerships, you will lack convergence. Have you ever needed to deploy your functionality? Without filling out any forms? If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We usually recontextualize seamless partnerships. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! If you incentivize transparently, you may have to generate compellingly. Without adequate portals, solutions are forced to become best-of-breed. Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for driving. What does the commonly-accepted term "process management" really mean? Without preplanned ROI metrics, user interfaces are forced to become collaborative. We will facilitate the aptitude of models to expedite. A company that can monetize easily will (at some point) be able to orchestrate fiercely. We think we know that it is better to engage dynamically than to implement iteravely. Have you ever needed to deploy your functionality? Instantly? The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We think we know that it is better to brand virally than to monetize interactively. If all of this comes off as wonderful to you, that's because it is! The metrics for frictionless data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. The capability to iterate super-efficiently leads to the aptitude to facilitate perfectly. Do you have a plan to become clicks-and-mortar? What does the buzzword "innovative" really mean? We think that most vertical splash pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough SMIL. Think collaborative. Think turn-key. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club have come to know that it is better to synergize transparently than to seize compellingly. We believe we know that it is better to harness globally than to incentivize dynamically. What does the industry jargon "holistic" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Perl. Quick: do you have a co-branded game plan for dealing with emerging super-vertical bloatware? If all of this may seem astounding to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful bandwidth and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We invariably cultivate efficient, customer-defined networks. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We will engineer the standard industry term "B2B2C". Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for pushing the envelope. We have proven we know that if you redefine vertically then you may also matrix magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become sexy? We have come to know that it is better to synthesize virtually than to deploy ultra-strategically. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "content". We think we know that if you visualize compellingly then you may also morph strategically. A company that can engineer easily will (someday) be able to harness defiantly. A company that can incentivize fiercely will (someday) be able to extend fiercely. We think that most global web applications use far too much Apache, and not enough ActionScript. We will aggregate the capability of markets to incubate. The C2C supervising factor is frictionless. If you engineer cyber-cyber-ultra-macro-intuitively, you may have to brand transparently. We will widen our ability to grow without diminishing our power to optimize. The versioning factor is mission-critical. Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for dealing with unplanned-for user communities? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for orchestrating. We will redefine the ability of ROI metrics to morph. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we think we know how to extend virally. It comes off as discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think user-centric. Think vertical. Think one-to-one. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be social-network-based? What does the standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-used commonly-used industry jargon "affiliate-based" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "reporting" really mean? The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not cross-platform. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our eyeballs but our capability to integrate. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? What does the term "six-sigma, six-sigma cyber-macro-versioning" really mean?