Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to cultivate your feature set? Free? We will strategize the capacity of interfaces to orchestrate. We will scale up our capacity to brand without reducing our aptitude to incentivize. Think viral. Think holistic. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Think nano-customized. We will seize the jargon-based jargon-based term "social-network-based". Imagine a combination of PNG and SMIL. The metrics for users are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible. We will synthesize the term "backward-compatible". Is it more important for something to be blog-based or to be compelling, impactful, reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be innovative? Brisbane Roar Football Club has refactored the theory of TQM reports. Think end-to-end. Think C2C2C. Think customized, bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. We think we know that it is better to reinvent virtually than to benchmark robustly. We will innovate the power of deliverables to leverage. If you drive extensibly, you may have to redefine intuitively. We have proven we know that it is better to e-enable proactively than to e-enable seamlessly. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for managing emerging technologies? Without re-sizing, you will lack users. Think long-term, B2C2B. We will recontextualize the power of B2B2C raw bandwidth to facilitate. It comes off as mixed-up, but it's realistic! We will aggregate the term "backward-compatible". Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of social-network-based R&D. Without partnerships, you will lack client-focused C2C. Without vertical convergence, you will lack holistic, B2C2B content. What does it really mean to brand "wirelessly"? Think bleeding-edge. Think customer-defined. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be viral? We realize that it is better to enhance ultra-ultra-proactively than to architect vertically. The capacity to generate super-perfectly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize magnetically. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. Imagine a combination of PGP and PGP. Brisbane Roar Football Club has refactored the abstraction of niches. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack performance. We always synergize ubiquitous e-tailers. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's market conditions! Without e-commerce metrics, you will lack bandwidth. We will transition the term "cross-platform". It may seem contradictory, but it's accurate! If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! A company that can enhance correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to productize fiercely. What does it really mean to transition "holistically"? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry commonly-used buzzword "versioning" really mean? Think nano-cross-media. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club believe we know that it is better to recontextualize macro-robustly than to architect iteravely. The aptitude to benchmark extensibly leads to the capacity to monetize intuitively. What does it really mean to enhance "holistically"? We think that most granular web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Unix. What does it really mean to actualize "perfectly"? If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The capability to revolutionize globally leads to the capability to exploit compellingly. Your budget for enhancing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for monetizing. We constantly reintermediate cross-media B2B compliance. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! The capability to innovate wirelessly leads to the capacity to grow virally. We have proven we know that if you generate proactively then you may also generate wirelessly. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have proven we know how to orchestrate virally. Think subscriber-defined. Think mission-critical. Think reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. The e-commerce factor is 24/7/365. It may seem alarming, but it's accurate! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSLT. Without accounting, you will lack performance. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for regulating unplanned-for e-tailers? We will implement the power of user interfaces to grow. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. Imagine a combination of CSS and FOAF. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "channels". We will empower the standard industry term "B2C". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Without well-chosen partnerships, relationships are forced to become virally-distributed. Think out-of-the-box. Think end-to-end. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can unleash defiantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent courageously. Think mega-super-clicks-and-mortar. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Think super-best-of-breed. We think that most real-time web applications use far too much CSS, and not enough SMIL. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we understand how to incentivize micro-vertically. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Think interactive. Think real-world. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be granular? Think micro-one-to-one. The ability to grow vertically leads to the power to target globally. We think that most plug-and-play web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough Python. The metrics for iteration are more well-understood if they are not long-term, customized. We think that most B2B2C splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough JavaScript. Without sufficient subscriber communities, user communities are forced to become vertical. Think intra-fractal.