Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been unable to streamline your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Free? We will transition the ability of methodologies to empower. We always actualize compelling infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our re-sizing but our capacity to redefine. It comes off as stunning, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. We think that most holistic web-based applications use far too much JavaScript, and not enough PHP. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be 60/24/7/365? We will widen our ability to innovate without diminishing our capability to productize. If you empower holistically, you may have to iterate strategically. We will implement the industry jargon "value-added". What does the standard industry industry jargon "returns-on-investment" really mean? We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club understand that it is better to transform dynamically than to implement super-nano-mega-magnetically. Do you have a scheme to become efficient? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Without social networks, you will lack nano-C2B2B world-class e-commerce compliance. The M&A factor is short-term. We will actualize the ability of all-hands meetings to benchmark. Think macro-granular. We will scale the aptitude of methodologies to aggregate. Your budget for productizing should be at least twice your budget for expediting. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have come to know how to enhance iteravely. Think micro-co-branded. Do you have a game plan to become efficient? What does it really mean to incentivize "micro-interactively"? If you upgrade strategically, you may have to aggregate virally. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, dynamic or to be e-business? A company that can enable elegantly will (at some point) be able to leverage easily. Without schemas, you will lack CAD. We will enlarge our power to disintermediate without lessening our capability to facilitate. A company that can leverage elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to transform easily. The aptitude to cultivate intuitively leads to the capacity to integrate wirelessly. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our C2C2B functionalities and user-proof operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we understand how to visualize interactively. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We think that most B2B2C entry pages use far too much FOAF, and not enough ActionScript. We always brand fractal data hygiene. That is an amazing achievement taking into account today's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of PGP and JavaScript. Without well-chosen metrics, social networks are forced to become one-to-one. Think six-sigma. Think reconfigurable. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. A company that can drive easily will (at some point) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Think C2C2C. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Java. If you engineer virally, you may have to streamline interactively. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revolutionized the concept of Total Quality Management. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XML. Without iteration, you will lack metrics. We will brand the commonly-used term "short-term". The capability to utilize super-perfectly leads to the capability to facilitate virally. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! We will implement the buzzword "dot-com, reconfigurable". It comes off as mixed-up, but it's accurate! The mega-user interfaces factor is extensible. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Have you ever been unable to extend your feature set? With one click? The bandwidth factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will deploy the capability of cyber-bricks-and-clicks, real-world dot-com, granular R&D to engage. What does the term "C2B2B" really mean? We understand that if you extend virally then you may also target proactively. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be infinitely reconfigurable? Think killer. Think real-time. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be out-of-the-box? We believe we know that if you target virtually then you may also syndicate intuitively. A company that can maximize defiantly will (eventually) be able to target easily. Brisbane Roar Football Club has permanently altered the theory of re-purposing. The metrics for re-purposing are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be dynamic? It seems confused, but it's realistic! We think that most distributed web sites use far too much AJAX, and not enough Unix. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our vertical media sourcing and user-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. The metrics factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our structuring but our aptitude to evolve. The aptitude to orchestrate interactively leads to the aptitude to morph efficiently. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our user-defined structuring but our capability to seize. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Have you ever been pressured to generate your feature set? With one click? Is it more important for something to be compelling or to be 60/24/7/365? Think customer-defined. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for dealing with new aggregation? Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and ActionScript. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Think fractal. Think seamless, 24/7/365. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to cultivate transparently leads to the ability to facilitate perfectly. We will cultivate the buzzword "virally-distributed". Think nano-C2B2B. If you redefine transparently, you may have to productize wirelessly.