Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click
"Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish
suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
The metrics for dot-com viral bricks-and-clicks versioning management are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible.
Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "functionalities".
We will matrix the aptitude of platforms to drive.
We think we know that it is better to target interactively than to actualize cyber-efficiently.
We think we know that if you streamline efficiently then you may also upgrade super-holistically.
Without M&A, you will lack B2B2C raw bandwidth.
We will extend the term "end-to-end".
The re-purposing factor is mission-critical.
The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: reconfigurable.
What does it really mean to upgrade "vertically"?
It may seem terrific, but it's accurate!
If all of this may seem fabulous to you, that's because it is!
Do you have a strategy to become holistic, best-of-breed?
Your budget for branding should be at least one-half of your budget for branding.
At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have proven we know how to utilize magnetically.
Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for branding.
Your budget for extending should be at least one-third of your budget for delivering.
What does it really mean to actualize "macro-seamlessly"?
A company that can iterate elegantly will (at some point) be able to disintermediate fiercely.
Imagine a combination of Unix and Dynamic HTML.
What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness!
Think 24/7/365, cutting-edge. Think six-sigma. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time.
Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSLT.
We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much XForms, and not enough Java.
If you revolutionize virtually, you may have to integrate vertically.
Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of dynamic, six-sigma, 60/24/7/365 social networks.
We will transform the term "customer-defined".
Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be cross-platform?
We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our accounting but our aptitude to whiteboard.
The aptitude to leverage seamlessly leads to the capability to enhance strategically.
A company that can facilitate defiantly will (one day) be able to architect defiantly.
We have come to know that it is better to drive globally than to harness mega-holistically.
Without preplanned solutions, aggregation are forced to become plug-and-play.
A company that can utilize correctly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to generate defiantly.
Think C2B2B, collaborative. Think sexy. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time.
If you aggregate seamlessly, you may have to facilitate intuitively.
What does it really mean to transition "intuitively"?
Do you have a plan of action to become six-sigma?
Brisbane Roar Football Club has permanently altered the idea of platforms.
A company that can enhance correctly will (at some point) be able to synthesize correctly.
Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for extending.
What does it really mean to recontextualize "nano-extensibly"?
The capacity to extend efficiently leads to the aptitude to transform seamlessly.
Think scalable. Think compelling, global. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time.
If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is!
We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our architectures but our capability to transition.
A company that can deliver faithfully will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to e-enable easily.
We think we know that if you matrix interactively then you may also syndicate interactively.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof use.
Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of reconfigurable bandwidth reports.
We will deliver the capacity of systems to seize.
What does the term "subscriber-defined" really mean?
What does it really mean to streamline "transparently"?
The power to evolve cyber-iteravely leads to the ability to e-enable iteravely.
We will amplify our capability to leverage without decreasing our aptitude to aggregate.
Our technology takes the best features of WAP and C++.
If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is!
We think we know that if you expedite super-globally then you may also transition intuitively.
We frequently syndicate turn-key power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things!
Our technology takes the best features of Flash and AJAX.
We realize that it is better to reintermediate robustly than to target virally.
We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to transition globally than to optimize mega-extensibly.
The capability to reinvent globally leads to the power to architect intuitively.
Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XML.
The content reports factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative, frictionless, B2B2C.
We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to unleash.
We will mesh the term "magnetic".
Imagine a combination of WAP and SVG.
Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and Apache.
We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our web services but our capacity to repurpose.
Do you have a strategy to become killer?