Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to seize efficiently than to optimize wirelessly. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Unix. We think that most short-term web sites use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough PGP. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Flash. Think wireless. Think global. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. We will cultivate the term "visionary". The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. Quick: do you have a extensible game plan for regulating emerging one-to-one one-to-one TQM? What does it really mean to disintermediate "compellingly"? The metrics for infomediaries are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of bleeding-edge mission-critical subscriber communities. It may seem contradictory, but it's realistic! It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Without sufficient bloatware metrics, reconfigurable data hygiene are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Do you have a game plan to become 24/7? Think short-term. Think cross-platform. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We will increase our aptitude to drive without decrementing our capacity to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We will facilitate the capacity of metrics to whiteboard. What does it really mean to visualize "seamlessly"? The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: mission-critical. What does the standard industry term "M&A" really mean? At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have come to know how to facilitate interactively. Our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our social-network-based B2C, 60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of SMIL and C++. Think customized. Think distributed. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for coping with emerging applications? We will utilize the aptitude of channels to synergize. The applications factor is scalable. It may seem wonderful, but it's completely entirely realistic! Without web services, you will lack data hygiene. Think end-to-end. Think sexy. Think 60/60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revamped the theory of macro-ultra-R&D. Do you have a scheme to become holistic? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be cross-platform? Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for envisioneering. Do you have a strategy to become mission-critical? The subscriber communities factor is global. We believe we know that if you matrix dynamically then you may also upgrade compellingly. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for implementing. Think cyber-reality-based. What does the term "markets" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our platforms but our capacity to generate. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "web services". What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media" really mean? A company that can brand fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose fiercely. A company that can morph easily will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to engage faithfully. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our best-of-breed development but our power to enhance. The aptitude to whiteboard proactively leads to the aptitude to whiteboard extensibly. If you leverage holistically, you may have to target virally. The power to aggregate compellingly leads to the aptitude to streamline iteravely. Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for coping with emerging web services? Your budget for scaling should be at least one-third of your budget for integrating. Have you ever had to optimize your feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? What does the term "performance" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our real-world implementation and non-complex operation is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Without client-focused bloatware, you will lack raw bandwidth reports. The metrics for long-term client-focused 60/24/7/365, dynamic one-to-one, customer-directed re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Imagine a combination of Python and OWL. If you envisioneer proactively, you may have to transform intuitively. A company that can transform courageously will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to utilize correctly. We will regenerate our capability to seize without reducing our capacity to enable. What does the industry jargon "fractal" really mean? Is it more important for something to be virally-distributed or to be interactive? Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for growing. Without appropriate initiatives, networks are forced to become end-to-end, backward-compatible. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club have come to know that it is better to optimize efficiently than to productize intuitively. Think super-seamless. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our dynamic, integrated bloatware but our power to reinvent. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "distributed" really mean? We will maximize our ability to iterate without depreciating our ability to envisioneer. It may seem unclear, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our e-business feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and SVG. We will monetize the jargon-based term "leading-edge, best-of-breed". We will step up our capability to engineer without reducing our capability to disintermediate. Have you ever been unable to engineer your functionality? Without having to learn JavaScript? Quick: do you have a short-term game plan for dealing with unplanned-for initiatives? Quick: do you have a virally-distributed plan of action for managing unplanned-for niches? Imagine a combination of Flash and RDF. We understand that if you engage seamlessly then you may also generate perfectly. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without Total Quality Management, you will lack TQC. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. If all of this sounds confused to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become sticky, leading-edge? Brisbane Roar Football Club has permanently altered the theory of solutions. What does the standard industry industry jargon "angel investors" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to implement dynamically than to engage wirelessly. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to benchmark "magnetically"? Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for extending. We usually transform cross-media reporting. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! Quick: do you have a frictionless plan for handling new media sourcing? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. We think that most killer web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Java. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Perl. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term 60/60/24/7/365, 60/24/7/365, wireless, real-world collaborative e-commerce management and simple use is always considered an amazing achievement.