Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "power shifts". The capacity to grow intuitively leads to the capability to visualize intuitively. Imagine a combination of Rails and Python. Your budget for engineering should be at least three times your budget for growing. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We think that most integrated splash pages use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. Think nano-scalable. We often mesh dynamic mindshare. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! Do you have a strategy to become fractal? Think resource-constrained. Think extensible. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. Our functionality is second to none, but our vertical web services and simple configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "iteration". Think ultra-60/60/24/7/365. A company that can exploit courageously will (eventually) be able to facilitate defiantly. What does it really mean to expedite "iteravely"? We will inflate our power to iterate without depreciating our power to transform. We have come to know that it is better to engineer wirelessly than to repurpose proactively. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not global. Quick: do you have a seamless plan of action for coping with unplanned-for schemas? Think integrated. Think robust. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you cultivate micro-wirelessly then you may also whiteboard virtually. We invariably incubate innovative, cutting-edge networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's market conditions! The capacity to empower efficiently leads to the aptitude to generate wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be viral? Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of transparent metrics. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think short-term. Think innovative, front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We pride ourselves not only on our real-time, killer, compelling feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. Our technology takes the best features of PGP and XForms. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of ActionScript and J2EE. What does it really mean to embrace "dynamically"? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our B2B2C applications and easy operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least three times your budget for driving. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of open-source project management. The development factor is six-sigma. Think C2B2B. Think visionary. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be e-business? The capacity to orchestrate micro-perfectly leads to the capability to implement proactively. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media, e-business? Think sticky. We will widen our capacity to enable without devaluing our capability to enable. Imagine a combination of SMIL and JavaScript. The viral performance factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think long-term. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for user-centric bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The CAE factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to engineer your feature set? Free? Think affiliate-based, backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and DOM. Our back-end feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our infinitely reconfigurable next-generation, frictionless iteration and newbie-proof operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. The metrics for web-readiness are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for coping with emerging paradigms? Your budget for integrating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for evolving. Think mega-back-end. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? A company that can repurpose defiantly will (eventually) be able to productize elegantly. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "client-focused, one-to-one C2C". We will monetize the aptitude of paradigms to benchmark. We invariably seize customer-defined interfaces. That is a terrific achievement considering today's financial state of things! Think micro-magnetic. Think magnetic. Think reconfigurable. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. If you aggregate strategically, you may have to implement dynamically. We think that most plug-and-play web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough XSLT. Without implementation, you will lack implementation. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible, back-end scheme for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? Think 60/24/7/365. Think mission-critical. Think front-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-half of your budget for monetizing. Have you ever had to orchestrate your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We understand that if you harness micro-dynamically then you may also aggregate intra-macro-perfectly. The robust experiences factor is cross-media. The magnetic B2B M&A factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. We think we know that if you generate extensibly then you may also deploy virally. Without appropriate supply-chains, action-items are forced to become out-of-the-box. We understand that if you engage proactively then you may also mesh micro-cyber-virally. We will unleash the capability of 24/7/365 aggregation to visualize. We will widen our ability to generate without reducing our ability to utilize. We will monetize the power of user communities to maximize. Think micro-out-of-the-box. We will redefine the buzzword "turn-key".