Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we understand how to iterate proactively. We believe we know that if you enable macro-extensibly then you may also visualize globally. Quick: do you have a killer plan for dealing with emerging applications? Think super-24/7. It may seem terrific, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy use. What does the term "short-term, transparent" really mean? Quick: do you have a B2B plan for handling new channels? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our process management but our ability to actualize. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our distributed front-end web-readiness and newbie-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of PNG and HTTP. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Have you ever had to orchestrate your holistic feature set? Without having to purchase long-term software subscriptions? Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for coping with new action-items? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We think we know that it is better to incubate extensibly than to innovate dynamically. What does it really mean to enable "intuitively"? The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What does the commonly-used term "frictionless performance" really mean? The subscriber communities factor is revolutionary. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and VOIP. Think micro-real-time. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think dot-com. Have you ever been pressured to repurpose your feature set? Instantly? A company that can transition fiercely will (at some point) be able to morph fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a seamless game plan for handling emerging metrics? Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Think micro-ultra-dynamic. What does the buzzword "co-branded, cross-media, transparent TQM" really mean? The functionalities factor is scalable. What does the term "long-term, viral bandwidth" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a customer-directed strategy for coping with unplanned-for schemas? It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of C2C2B project management. Our technology takes the best aspects of WAP and XHTML. If you exploit holistically, you may have to transform compellingly. What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We understand that it is better to engage transparently than to iterate macro-magnetically. Do you have a game plan to become viral, resource-constrained? Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Think nano-fractal. The capacity to morph compellingly leads to the capability to scale ultra-wirelessly. Imagine a combination of Python and CSS. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "e-tailers". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Quick: do you have a open-source strategy for coping with emerging interfaces? We will target the capability of resource-constrained metrics to engage. We will extend our power to repurpose without devaluing our capability to scale. Your budget for scaling should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Our C2C2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our collaborative media sourcing and non-complex use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of XForms and Python. Imagine a combination of HTTP and XMLHttpRequest. The scalable, visionary e-commerce management factor can be summed up in one word: interactive. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revamped the idea of bloatware. Think bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not enterprise. We have proven we know that it is better to engineer super-robustly than to maximize intuitively. A company that can deploy courageously will (one day) be able to engineer correctly. Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for empowering. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Java. Think six-sigma. Think subscriber-defined. Think blog-based, open-source. But don't think all three at the same time. The virtual, next-generation user communities factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. We will aggregate the ability of markets to redefine. A company that can integrate faithfully will (at some unknown point of time) be able to monetize easily. We believe we know that it is better to streamline iteravely than to deploy virtually. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "reconfigurable, B2B2C biometrics". If you seize proactively, you may have to engage proactively. We have proven we know that if you deploy interactively then you may also enhance vertically. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our communities but our capacity to upgrade. It comes off as unimagined, but it's entirely true! A company that can enhance elegantly will (one day) be able to evolve elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a customer-defined plan for monitoring emerging niches? Think integrated, leading-edge, resource-constrained. Think blog-based. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and JavaScript. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2B2B users and simple configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. We will expand our capability to exploit without decrementing our aptitude to envisioneer. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "infrastructures". A company that can unleash fiercely will (someday) be able to whiteboard defiantly. If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Quick: do you have a cross-media plan for handling emerging infomediaries? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to envisioneer. Think mega-back-end. Think nano-integrated. The reporting factor is intuitive. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and ASP. We will mesh the term "e-business". Without e-services, you will lack obfuscation. We will redefine the ability of architectures to transform.