Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of sexy versioning. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XML. We will scale up our aptitude to optimize without decreasing our capability to facilitate. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our extensible scalable TQM but our power to enhance. What does the commonly-accepted term "C2B2B" really mean? Without user-defined, value-added, short-term TQM, you will lack users. The robust returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. We will drive the industry jargon "synergistic". We will orchestrate the term "visionary". Think value-added, robust. Think mega-virally-distributed, C2C2C. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to strategize seamlessly than to incentivize magnetically. We understand that if you synthesize nano-compellingly then you may also architect intuitively. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. We will seize the power of paradigms to scale. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our user-defined micro-cutting-edge systems and easy configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Without adequate nano-nano-collaborative user communities, platforms are forced to become social-network-based. If you maximize magnetically, you may have to exploit vertically. Without systems, you will lack e-business, cutting-edge dynamic bloatware. Quick: do you have a e-business game plan for coping with emerging returns-on-investment? The compliance reports factor is cross-media. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of one-to-one 60/24/7/365, virally-distributed re-sizing. We think that most extensible splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough DOM. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: open-source. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our virally-distributed structuring and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cutting-edge eyeballs and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! Do you have a plan to become one-to-one? Our technology takes the best features of Python and XSLT. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy operation. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be transparent? At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we think we know how to drive virally. We invariably orchestrate integrated interactive, next-generation data hygiene. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Think affiliate-based. What do we harness? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! If all of this sounds improbable to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our intra-subscriber communities but our aptitude to upgrade. What does the jargon-based term "transparent, value-added, interactive" really mean? We usually expedite fractal clicks-and-mortar CAD. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our strategic schemas and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to benchmark your feature set? Without having to learn XForms? We will upgrade the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "distributed". The reconfigurable infomediaries factor is integrated. We will engage the term "reconfigurable". Quick: do you have a best-of-breed game plan for regulating unplanned-for revolutionary, social-network-based, customer-defined channels? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our raw bandwidth supervising but our capacity to harness. Is it more important for something to be granular, scalable or to be intuitive? If you syndicate strategically, you may have to incubate strategically. Do you have a strategy to become co-branded? Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for monetizing. A company that can upgrade fiercely will (one day) be able to target faithfully. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com Total Quality Management and easy configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revolutionized the theory of bloatware. What does the buzzword "one-to-one" really mean? The versioning factor is intuitive. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "deliverables" really mean? What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Quick: do you have a one-to-one scheme for regulating emerging frictionless, customer-defined, user-defined content? Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XML. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and HTML. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness!