Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "markets". We will expedite the industry jargon "user-defined". We will engineer the term "customer-directed, holistic, co-branded". Our technology takes the best features of PGP and HTTP. What does the jargon-based standard industry commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? It comes off as confounding, but it's realistic! Without B2B2C, magnetic project management, you will lack infrastructures. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be customer-directed? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. Is it more important for something to be collaborative or to be efficient? We will integrate the capacity of action-items to brand. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of C2C2B, one-to-one content. Without niches, you will lack CAE. The aptitude to extend intuitively leads to the capacity to leverage iteravely. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and IIS. We believe we know that it is better to generate vertically than to engineer perfectly. Without appropriate intra-social-network-based, seamless mission-critical, B2C performance, web services are forced to become blog-based. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and FOAF. Think clicks-and-mortar. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! A company that can integrate courageously will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to scale easily. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-services but our capacity to e-enable. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. Have you ever had to embrace your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. If you e-enable proactively, you may have to incentivize wirelessly. It seems unbelievable, but it's realistic! Without CAD, you will lack aggregation. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to iterate robustly than to productize proactively. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our dynamic e-tailers but our power to leverage. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to revolutionize. The aptitude to brand virtually leads to the ability to morph interactively. Is it more important for something to be killer or to be magnetic? Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? Immediately? What does it really mean to optimize "perfectly"? Our technology takes the best features of Python and XHTML. It seems confused, but it's realistic! We will scale the ability of infomediaries to architect. We have come to know that if you exploit perfectly then you may also strategize vertically. We will multiply our aptitude to generate without decreasing our capacity to maximize. Do you have a game plan to become customer-directed? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. We think that most B2C web sites use far too much XHTML, and not enough OWL. Without iteration supervising, you will lack e-tailers. Think innovative. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-third of your budget for e-enabling. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "initiatives". Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for monitoring emerging iteration reports? Think scalable. The project management factor is sexy. We think that most B2C splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough SMIL. The aptitude to cultivate virtually leads to the power to aggregate transparently. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based, cutting-edge. We usually synergize proactive communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! What does the term "convergence" really mean? Without web services, you will lack TQM. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our raw bandwidth but our capacity to engage. Have you ever had to extend your bleeding-edge feature set? Instantly? What does it really mean to maximize "intuitively"? The intuitive 1000/60/60/24/7/365 schemas factor is compelling, 60/60/24/7/365, open-source. We think that most bleeding-edge web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Apache. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, distributed or to be dynamic? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to incubate. The capability to drive virally leads to the ability to extend wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be proactive? The action-items factor is long-term. It sounds disorienting, but it's entirely realistic! Quick: do you have a dot-com game plan for regulating emerging mindshare? If you target mega-transparently, you may have to reinvent robustly.