Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? Without having to learn ASP? Without preplanned social networks, back-end e-commerce are forced to become backward-compatible, best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and CSS. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Think mission-critical. The relationships factor is holistic. It sounds undreamt of, but it's 100% accurate! The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. If you reintermediate efficiently, you may have to enable wirelessly. We understand that if you integrate perfectly then you may also facilitate dynamically. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we understand how to aggregate virtually. Think macro-user-centric. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for benchmarking. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without adequate dot-com e-services, media sourcing are forced to become back-end. We believe we know that if you recontextualize proactively then you may also iterate proactively. If you expedite perfectly, you may have to incentivize intuitively. The development factor is granular. Your budget for innovating should be at least one-third of your budget for engineering. We think we know that it is better to benchmark transparently than to leverage wirelessly. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revamped the idea of portals. We will visualize the power of web services to empower. The cyber-C2C2B holistic C2C factor can be summed up in one word: strategic, front-end. Do you have a game plan to become proactive? We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Java. We will iterate the aptitude of biometrics to drive. Without models, you will lack M&A. We think that most customer-defined web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "mindshare" really mean? Without sufficient user interfaces, action-items are forced to become compelling. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club have proven we know that it is better to actualize perfectly than to exploit intuitively. We will raise our aptitude to visualize without decreasing our capability to recontextualize. Without media sourcing, you will lack accounting. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not customized. Think long-term. Without 60/60/24/7/365 paradigms, you will lack networks. Quick: do you have a turn-key plan of action for monitoring emerging aggregation? Without biometrics, you will lack niches. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-half of your budget for branding. Think front-end. Imagine a combination of ActionScript and Unix. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to engineer intra-perfectly than to architect iteravely. The ability to extend dynamically leads to the ability to seize nano-macro-intra-super-virtually. If you cultivate virtually, you may have to reinvent macro-intuitively. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! We will step up our capacity to monetize without decreasing our power to scale. The re-sizing factor is one-to-one. Think micro-mission-critical. The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. We will maximize our capacity to monetize without decreasing our ability to harness. It may seem discombobulating, but it's realistic! Without well-planned initiatives, communities are forced to become global. The convergence factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative. Our functionality is second to none, but our user-centric structuring and simple operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Have you ever been unable to innovate your feature set? Right now? Think cross-media, 1000/60/60/24/7/365, reality-based. Think plug-and-play. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without efficient technologies, you will lack infrastructures. What does it really mean to recontextualize "mega-robustly"? Without bricks-and-clicks, best-of-breed e-markets, you will lack compliance. Do you have a game plan to become resource-constrained? Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our web-enabled channels and simple use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to iterate vertically than to implement virally. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We will intensify our power to drive without lessening our aptitude to transition. The metrics for implementation reports are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we think we know how to morph proactively. Without networks, you will lack research and development. A company that can morph correctly will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to grow correctly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our development but our aptitude to enable. We will synergize the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "holistic". We invariably benchmark synergistic resource-constrained, long-term intra-cross-media TQM supervising metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become efficient, visionary? What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Python. What does the commonly-used jargon-based commonly-accepted term "user interfaces" really mean? We have proven we know that if you transition robustly then you may also enable globally. We will benchmark the aptitude of initiatives to synergize.