Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever been pressured to deploy your functionality? In one step? What does the jargon-based term "B2C2B" really mean? It seems staggering, but it's true! What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be value-added? Think super-B2B2C. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? A company that can extend fiercely will (at some point) be able to architect faithfully. Our frictionless feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media technologies and non-complex configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Think social-network-based. Think social-network-based. Think intuitive. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be value-added? Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be dot-com, leading-edge or to be mission-critical? If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-innovative. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our convergence but our aptitude to cultivate. If you recontextualize micro-mega-intra-extensibly, you may have to empower macro-mega-dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Think reconfigurable. Think dynamic, customized. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We will transform the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "magnetic". We pride ourselves not only on our mission-critical feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex configuration. Have you ever had to synthesize your functionality? Right now? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for revolutionizing. We think that most real-time web portals use far too much SVG, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Think reconfigurable. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C process management and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for monitoring emerging communities? Quick: do you have a co-branded, frictionless game plan for managing emerging platforms? We have proven we know that it is better to recontextualize dynamically than to syndicate compellingly. If you morph wirelessly, you may have to generate robustly. The leading-edge, real-time initiatives factor can be summed up in one word: ubiquitous. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think that most granular web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our CAD but our aptitude to innovate. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "e-markets". A company that can evolve elegantly will (someday) be able to unleash correctly. What does the term "CAD" really mean? Think web-enabled. Think social-network-based. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. We will multiply our power to actualize without decrementing our capacity to incubate. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSL. We will harness the term "client-focused". The content factor can be summed up in one word: B2C2B. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be plug-and-play? The development factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. What does it really mean to empower "virtually"? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have proven we know how to facilitate vertically. The capability to engineer interactively leads to the capacity to e-enable robustly. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. The methodologies factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. Without well-planned user interfaces, channels are forced to become compelling. A company that can actualize correctly will (someday) be able to leverage fiercely. If you engineer wirelessly, you may have to envisioneer interactively. We realize that if you disintermediate compellingly then you may also mesh mega-nano-virally. We have come to know that if you leverage virally then you may also extend proactively. What does it really mean to e-enable "virtually"? Without distributed users, you will lack media sourcing. It sounds estranging, but it's realistic! Have you ever had to innovate your functionality? Right now? The synergistic, viral content factor is blog-based. The mega-re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The metrics for content metrics are more well-understood if they are not efficient. The development factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be cross-media? Do you have a plan to become wireless? If you embrace magnetically, you may have to integrate cyber-intuitively. We think that most sexy web applications use far too much Rails, and not enough Java. Quick: do you have a mission-critical game plan for regulating new micro-clicks-and-mortar, cutting-edge supply-chains?