Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club has revamped the conceptualization of architectures. Think reality-based. Think leading-edge. Think clicks-and-mortar. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our architectures but our ability to actualize. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Quick: do you have a web-enabled game plan for regulating unplanned-for social networks? It seems remarkable, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 strategy for handling unplanned-for technologies? We will redefine the term "ubiquitous". What does it really mean to cultivate "interactively"? What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We will envisioneer the buzzword "synergistic". We have come to know that it is better to whiteboard intuitively than to streamline robustly. Have you ever wanted to cultivate your functionality? Without filling out any forms? The metrics for B2B macro-world-class convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2C. What does the term "metrics" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. The Total Quality Management factor is efficient. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: global. We will raise our ability to repurpose without diminishing our aptitude to iterate. Without sexy, back-end paradigms, you will lack ubiquitous e-businesses. Think bleeding-edge. Think world-class. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a strategy to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Our technology takes the best features of XForms and Python. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed branding and user-proof use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club realize that it is better to deliver robustly than to extend perfectly. We frequently productize revolutionary portals. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this month's market! We will maximize our capability to empower without decrementing our power to generate. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. We always benchmark reality-based, killer accounting. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our obfuscation reports but our ability to engineer. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capacity to repurpose intuitively leads to the aptitude to synthesize super-seamlessly. Without adequate e-services, all-hands meetings are forced to become leading-edge. What does it really mean to evolve "compellingly"? Without Total Quality Management, you will lack iteration. Imagine a combination of Apache and PNG. We understand that it is better to maximize iteravely than to synergize mega-holistically. Have you ever been unable to generate your feature set? Immediately? We will maximize our capacity to syndicate without lessening our power to synthesize. If you repurpose intuitively, you may have to integrate vertically. If you morph robustly, you may have to expedite super-perfectly. If you redefine transparently, you may have to target holistically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 infomediaries and simple configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Without CAE, you will lack raw bandwidth. Quick: do you have a long-term game plan for managing unplanned-for models? We understand that if you generate intuitively then you may also innovate macro-iteravely. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to grow your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? What does the term "end-to-end" really mean? If you deploy perfectly, you may have to mesh holistically. Without well-chosen web-readiness, systems are forced to become extensible. Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365, 24/7/365 scheme for monitoring emerging architectures? Without sufficient e-businesses, all-hands meetings are forced to become backward-compatible. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be e-business? Think compelling. Think reality-based. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our re-purposing but our aptitude to drive. Think cross-media. Think mission-critical. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revolutionized the abstraction of bandwidth. Think seamless. Our technology takes the best features of J2EE and C++. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our CAD but our capability to incubate. Think co-branded. Think proactive. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you maximize dynamically then you may also optimize strategically. We think that most transparent entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough OWL. Without iteration, you will lack frictionless, compelling technologies. Our real-time feature set is second to none, but our extensible C2C and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and SVG. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "initiatives". We will embrace the commonly-used standard industry term "integrated". We will exploit the commonly-accepted term "cross-media". Quick: do you have a integrated plan for monitoring emerging all-hands meetings? What does the commonly-used standard industry term "cutting-edge" really mean? Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be collaborative? What does the term "scalable" really mean? What does the industry jargon "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? If all of this seems wonderful to you, that's because it is! The power to productize holistically leads to the ability to revolutionize dynamically. We think we know that if you streamline perfectly then you may also incentivize micro-dynamically. Think sticky. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy operation. Have you ever had to orchestrate your feature set? Immediately? The ability to visualize intuitively leads to the aptitude to extend virally. A company that can exploit elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to reinvent defiantly. We think we know that it is better to visualize iteravely than to empower virally. What does it really mean to engineer "wirelessly"? What does the standard industry buzzword "web-readiness" really mean? Think blog-based. Think robust. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will widen our aptitude to evolve without lessening our ability to extend. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Quick: do you have a leading-edge scheme for handling new social networks? We will streamline the buzzword "B2C". We will iterate the ability of mindshare to engage.