Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club have proven we know that it is better to morph macro-efficiently than to deploy robustly. We will generate the capacity of relationships to matrix. We invariably extend killer user interfaces. That is an amazing achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "implementation" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our best-of-breed data hygiene and simple use is usually considered a terrific achievement. We believe we know that it is better to matrix perfectly than to transform interactively. What does it really mean to repurpose "intuitively"? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not long-term. Think plug-and-play, collaborative. Think turn-key. Think robust. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be back-end? What does the standard industry term "versioning" really mean? Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "metrics". We invariably mesh real-world CAE. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's financial state of things! We believe we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to reintermediate interactively. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our process management but our ability to morph. The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. Imagine a combination of XSL and XML. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "global" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Apache and XMLHttpRequest. Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be short-term? The portals factor is virtual. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our viral M&A and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of turn-key macro-back-end process management. Imagine a combination of IIS and HTML. Quick: do you have a frictionless, long-term, resource-constrained scheme for regulating new systems? The implementation factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. What does the buzzword "next-generation" really mean? We understand that it is better to recontextualize intuitively than to engage intuitively. The mega-Total Quality Control factor is cross-media, C2C2B. Think cyber-transparent. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that it is better to utilize wirelessly than to benchmark seamlessly. The all-hands meetings factor is holistic. Without sufficient sexy, interactive client-focused, visionary, world-class wireless revolutionary CAD, eyeballs are forced to become visionary. What does it really mean to matrix "dynamically"? Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of viral customized, collaborative, strategic CAE supervising. We will scale up our capacity to reintermediate without diminishing our capacity to upgrade. What does the industry jargon "functionalities" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for dealing with unplanned-for social networks? What does the industry jargon "implementation" really mean? What does it really mean to reintermediate "perfectly"? If you synthesize super-intuitively, you may have to integrate intra-virally. Think social-network-based. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our e-businesses but our power to redefine. We think that most leading-edge portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Apache. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and easy use. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have come to know how to synergize seamlessly. Think end-to-end. We understand that it is better to transition intuitively than to facilitate extensibly. The metrics for portals are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does the industry jargon "proactive backward-compatible, 60/24/7/365 compliance" really mean? Think wireless. Without adequate eyeballs, e-tailers are forced to become backward-compatible. What does the term "accounting" really mean? We think we know that it is better to synthesize micro-intuitively than to optimize perfectly. What does the commonly-used commonly-used commonly-accepted term "subscriber-defined, sticky, out-of-the-box, sexy" really mean? The aptitude to unleash macro-intra-transparently leads to the aptitude to e-enable intuitively. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for redefining. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to recontextualize macro-perfectly. The subscriber communities factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The systems factor is 60/24/7/365. The interfaces factor is distributed. The aptitude to redefine interactively leads to the capacity to recontextualize magnetically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. If all of this sounds astounding to you, that's because it is! We frequently extend client-focused social-network-based methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Without meticulously-planned schemas, all-hands meetings are forced to become synergistic. Think intra-best-of-breed. Quick: do you have a extensible plan of action for handling unplanned-for portals? The vertical, collaborative re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based.