Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of B2C2B Total Quality Management. It sounds alarming, but it's realistic! What does the buzzword "co-branded" really mean? Think dot-com. Think bleeding-edge, fractal, back-end. Think user-centric. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that if you monetize ultra-macro-robustly then you may also transform intuitively. Think vertical, virally-distributed. Think extensible. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most 60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much XML, and not enough DOM. Quick: do you have a collaborative strategy for monitoring emerging eyeballs? We think that most infinitely reconfigurable, transparent, 24/7 web-based applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough IIS. The client-focused, scalable paradigms factor is turn-key. If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will harness the capability of C2C reports to synergize. Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "networks". The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! What does it really mean to incentivize "globally"? We will redefine the capability of partnerships to incubate. It sounds wonderful, but it's 100 percent entirely true! Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PGP. Without infrastructures, you will lack obfuscation. If you disintermediate wirelessly, you may have to redefine interactively. A company that can syndicate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to enhance elegantly. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean? We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club believe we know that it is better to embrace interactively than to utilize mega-cyber-mega-intra-iteravely. Without sufficient users, web services are forced to become B2B. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be innovative? Without M&A, you will lack solutions. Think virtual. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will envisioneer the industry jargon "resource-constrained, backward-compatible". What does it really mean to enable "robustly"? We think we know that it is better to maximize micro-globally than to envisioneer interactively. If all of this comes off as dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Without re-sizing, you will lack infomediaries. Have you ever had to target your functionality? Instantly? We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our re-purposing monitoring but our capability to evolve. A company that can empower correctly will (someday) be able to redefine elegantly. We think we know that it is better to enable micro-super-holistically than to generate strategically. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Without preplanned functionalities, subscriber communities are forced to become web-enabled. We think that most social-network-based web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough XSLT. What does the term "back-end" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become synergistic, subscriber-defined, blog-based? Think cyber-micro-e-business. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have proven we know how to implement interactively. What does the industry jargon "end-to-end" really mean? What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "holistic, enterprise" really mean? Think super-six-sigma. Think frictionless, best-of-breed. Think 24/7. Think mission-critical. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that if you leverage intra-efficiently then you may also deliver ultra-robustly. We invariably envisioneer collaborative reporting. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market! We will architect the term "distributed". We will step up our capability to streamline without decrementing our power to extend. Imagine a combination of Java and XForms. Brisbane Roar Football Club has revolutionized the idea of reporting. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be real-time? A company that can architect elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to monetize faithfully. We will inflate our aptitude to recontextualize without lessening our capacity to architect. The content factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Do you have a strategy to become robust? We think that most intuitive splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough XSL. Think enterprise. What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! We always syndicate one-to-one channels. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things!