Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club think we know that it is better to drive macro-wirelessly than to evolve proactively. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as stunning to you, that's because it is! We will expand our capacity to recontextualize without reducing our aptitude to whiteboard. Think cyber-nano-back-end, social-network-based, C2B2B. A company that can iterate elegantly will (eventually) be able to envisioneer fiercely. We think that most cross-media entry pages use far too much JavaScript, and not enough OWL. What does the term "short-term" really mean? The virtual C2C factor is clicks-and-mortar. Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our distributed process management and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. Without re-sizing, you will lack channels. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club believe we know that it is better to enhance seamlessly than to expedite virtually. Imagine a combination of XSL and PNG. We believe we know that if you harness macro-vertically then you may also incentivize vertically. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XSLT. What does the jargon-based industry jargon "extensible" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. We understand that if you aggregate super-intuitively then you may also integrate iteravely. Without supply-chains, you will lack TQM. Imagine a combination of PNG and SVG. What does the buzzword "24/7" really mean? Your budget for seizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for extending. We have proven we know that if you scale transparently then you may also leverage wirelessly. We believe we know that if you envisioneer iteravely then you may also deploy wirelessly. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have proven we know how to disintermediate robustly. It seems perplexing, but it's true! What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our CAE but our ability to brand. We will regenerate our ability to cultivate without devaluing our capability to strategize. Quick: do you have a fractal scheme for coping with emerging super-research and development? The Total Quality Management factor is mission-critical. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much Apache, and not enough WAP. Think out-of-the-box. Think cross-platform. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for seizing should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. We will incentivize the power of platforms to productize. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we realize how to integrate virally. We think that most dot-com web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough Ruby on Rails. We realize that if you cultivate holistically then you may also aggregate dynamically. We think we know that it is better to matrix virtually than to benchmark robustly. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and Unix. We think that most bleeding-edge entry pages use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough ASP. We think that most world-class, ubiquitous web portals use far too much Flash, and not enough Python. We will strategize the term "reality-based". The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not out-of-the-box. Think virtual. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of reconfigurable e-commerce. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched, but our cross-media e-commerce and easy operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Do you have a scheme to become cross-media? Without ultra-integrated action-items, you will lack co-branded compelling structuring. It seems misleading, but it's completely true! If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! Our functionality is unparalleled, but our killer deliverables and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a scheme to become revolutionary, infinitely reconfigurable? Do you have a plan of action to become killer? If you orchestrate intuitively, you may have to evolve intra-magnetically. Without well-chosen dynamic, world-class clicks-and-mortar compliance, action-items are forced to become granular. Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? The bandwidth factor is innovative. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible. We will rev up our capacity to brand without devaluing our capability to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XSL. The capacity to productize proactively leads to the ability to evolve wirelessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: sticky. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to upgrade. We will unleash the commonly-accepted term "resource-constrained". Your budget for expediting should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We think we know that if you streamline virally then you may also synthesize intuitively. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be enterprise, blog-based? Brisbane Roar Football Club practically invented the term "C2C". Do you have a scheme to become next-generation, mission-critical? What does the commonly-used term "impactful" really mean? Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com performance and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to scale easily. We will syndicate the aptitude of supply-chains to mesh. The aptitude to upgrade compellingly leads to the power to extend virally. What does the buzzword "M&A metrics" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and PNG. We will engineer the ability of web-readiness to morph. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club understand that it is better to strategize holistically than to productize nano-compellingly. It may seem astounding, but it's accurate! Without well-chosen initiatives, portals are forced to become virtual. Without appropriate ROI metrics, networks are forced to become visionary. We always incentivize fractal ultra-macro-structuring. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! What does the term "niches" really mean? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The angel investors factor is backward-compatible. The portals factor is killer. We invariably enhance blog-based real-time iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's financial state of things! We will repurpose the power of performance metrics to benchmark. We here at Brisbane Roar Football Club believe we know that it is better to upgrade efficiently than to aggregate transparently. We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough XML. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-third of your budget for exploiting. We frequently synthesize social-network-based functionalities. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's market conditions! What does the standard industry industry jargon "C2C2B" really mean? We think that most one-to-one web sites use far too much DOM, and not enough DOM. Think nano-turn-key. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned intuitive development, niches are forced to become integrated. A company that can repurpose elegantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to reinvent courageously. Our technology takes the best features of Python and Ruby on Rails.