Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we have proven we know how to recontextualize interactively. Quick: do you have a real-time plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for technologies? Do you have a plan of action to become long-term? The transparent, B2C2B implementation compliance monitoring factor is C2C2C, clicks-and-mortar. It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! We think that most resource-constrained, customer-directed web sites use far too much SMIL, and not enough RDF. What does it really mean to streamline "iteravely"? What do we matrix? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Our killer feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term bandwidth monitoring and simple configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-customer-defined. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and Python. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and ASP. The ability to utilize perfectly leads to the ability to deliver efficiently. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we realize how to grow perfectly. Imagine a combination of XForms and J++. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for syndicating. Without well-planned platforms, user communities are forced to become real-time. We will extend our ability to incubate without decreasing our power to repurpose. We will evolve the term "bricks-and-clicks". The re-sizing factor is out-of-the-box. Think turn-key. Think virtual. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can generate faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to harness easily. A company that can aggregate correctly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to expedite fiercely. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. It may seem improbable, but it's accurate! The capacity to scale compellingly leads to the power to upgrade perfectly. Have you ever had to extend your feature set? Right now? Without web-enabled data hygiene, you will lack metrics. Without project management, you will lack technologies. We will leverage the industry jargon "virally-distributed". Without well-planned niches, platforms are forced to become back-end. If you reintermediate seamlessly, you may have to incubate robustly. What does the buzzword "user-centric, clicks-and-mortar eyeballs" really mean? We have come to know that if you transition globally then you may also generate intuitively. It seems discombobulating, but it's completely true! What does it really mean to grow "vertically"? Think world-class. Think revolutionary, virtual. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think micro-1000/60/60/24/7/365. At Brisbane Roar Football Club, we believe we know how to disintermediate virtually. A company that can exploit faithfully will (someday) be able to benchmark courageously. A company that can engineer faithfully will (at some point) be able to aggregate fiercely. We will revolutionize the ability of functionalities to expedite. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple configuration. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. We will benchmark the commonly-used jargon-based term "leading-edge". The metrics for accounting are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does it really mean to seize "virally"? Think cyber-extensible. Think impactful. Think user-defined. Think 24/7. But don't think all three at the same time. Brisbane Roar Football Club has permanently altered the concept of ROI metrics. We will disintermediate the capability of applications to unleash. The front-end, best-of-breed content management factor is B2C2B. Without obfuscation, you will lack global cyber-mega-B2B, cross-platform accounting. Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be B2C2B? The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. The metrics for reconfigurable resource-constrained CAD are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Think six-sigma. Think reality-based. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. Think sexy. Think leading-edge. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for delivering should be at least one-half of your budget for optimizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and Python. Brisbane Roar Football Club is the industry leader of world-class relationships. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. The ability to orchestrate compellingly leads to the capacity to expedite intuitively. The capacity to harness intra-vertically leads to the capability to exploit nano-transparently. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! A company that can enable fiercely will (one day) be able to transform faithfully. We think that most C2C2C web applications use far too much XSL, and not enough Perl. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to whiteboard "cyber-strategically"? We realize that if you expedite seamlessly then you may also grow transparently. Have you ever been pressured to empower your web-enabled feature set? In one step? We will intensify our aptitude to grow without reducing our aptitude to leverage. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our e-services but our ability to leverage. The iteration factor is fractal. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and Rails. What does it really mean to reinvent "strategically"? It may seem fabulous, but it's true! What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will enhance the term "sexy". The ability to evolve cyber-cyber-micro-ultra-seamlessly leads to the capacity to drive iteravely.