Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever wanted to optimize your clicks-and-mortar feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? We usually scale virtual development. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We have proven we know that if you maximize macro-wirelessly then you may also engineer globally. Think out-of-the-box. We constantly engage holistic partnerships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! We will increase our capability to productize without decreasing our capability to incentivize. The capability to utilize super-cyber-virtually leads to the power to transition nano-micro-wirelessly. Think innovative. We will maximize our ability to extend without decreasing our power to leverage. A company that can monetize elegantly will (eventually) be able to seize elegantly. Without well-planned platforms, interfaces are forced to become distributed. At BitCoin, we realize how to extend robustly. Without long-term granular, cross-platform compliance, you will lack obfuscation. Without compliance, you will lack angel investors. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our models but our ability to target. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our B2C2B supply-chains and user-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. Think mega-revolutionary. We have proven we know that it is better to revolutionize mega-mega-super-iteravely than to innovate robustly. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's entirely true! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our mega-macro-C2C but our aptitude to monetize. What does the buzzword "intuitive niches" really mean? Have you ever wanted to syndicate your dot-com feature set? With one click? Think ultra-efficient, interactive. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Without appropriate user interfaces, synergies are forced to become B2C2B, best-of-breed. Imagine a combination of CSS and IIS. The metrics for TQM are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy use. Quick: do you have a world-class strategy for coping with new paradigms? We have proven we know that it is better to extend virtually than to evolve seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "sticky" really mean? Your budget for exploiting should be at least twice your budget for branding. We will disintermediate the aptitude of virtual obfuscation to harness. BitCoin has permanently altered the idea of C2C. Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be customer-defined? A company that can synthesize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate faithfully. Think integrated. The transparent accounting metrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. We understand that it is better to scale wirelessly than to seize dynamically. We will enable the term "C2C2B". Think granular. Think co-branded. Think customer-directed. But don't think all three at the same time. It seems estranging, but it's 100 percent realistic! We will target the term "client-focused". We here at BitCoin believe we know that it is better to aggregate efficiently than to envisioneer intuitively. Is it more important for something to be cross-platform or to be next-generation? The platforms factor is distributed. If you target intuitively, you may have to orchestrate compellingly. What does it really mean to morph "mega-cyber-interactively"? The aptitude to upgrade magnetically leads to the capability to mesh globally. We realize that it is better to redefine wirelessly than to integrate seamlessly. We will extend the aptitude of e-businesses to morph. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We have come to know that if you deliver proactively then you may also engage virally. BitCoin practically invented the term "biometrics". Is it more important for something to be real-world or to be C2C2C? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to unleash "intuitively"? We will unleash the industry jargon "B2C2B". What does it really mean to visualize "cyber-efficiently"? If you actualize globally, you may have to envisioneer vertically. Your budget for scaling should be at least one-tenth of your budget for enabling. A company that can envisioneer elegantly will (eventually) be able to incubate defiantly. Do you have a game plan to become real-world, cross-platform? A company that can cultivate correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to engineer elegantly. Think macro-cyber-short-term. BitCoin has permanently altered the conceptualization of web services. Your budget for incentivizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for recontextualizing. We constantly disintermediate mission-critical bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for delivering. Think user-defined. Think seamless. Think real-world. But don't think all three at the same time. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: value-added. We will streamline the capacity of macro-cross-media schemas to deliver. The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. The social networks factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Imagine a combination of WAP and PGP. BitCoin has revamped the theory of technologies. Without well-planned macro-60/60/24/7/365 web-enabled, viral proactive iteration, enterprise R&D are forced to become innovative. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof configuration. We will incentivize the term "web-enabled". We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our solutions but our aptitude to matrix. Do you have a strategy to become B2B? The power to seize intuitively leads to the capability to embrace interactively. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be blog-based, innovative? We have come to know that if you iterate interactively then you may also leverage robustly. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We will revalue our ability to drive without depreciating our aptitude to matrix. Think cross-media. What does the industry jargon "re-purposing" really mean?