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Andrew Davidson.
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Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)
Company Name: 

Your Randomly-Generated Corporate Gibberish:


Your budget for leveraging should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling.
At Bifurcated Rivets, we think we know how to incubate intuitively. If you architect virtually, you may have to deliver robustly. Imagine a combination of XHTML and Java. The metrics for networks are more well-understood if they are not backward-compatible, value-added. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Without re-purposing, you will lack Total Quality Control. The power to expedite perfectly leads to the capability to productize micro-compellingly. A company that can disintermediate fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to optimize defiantly. We will drive the term "end-to-end". If all of this comes off as astonishing to you, that's because it is! What does the commonly-used term "intuitive" really mean? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think open-source.
The capability to engineer perfectly leads to the power to disintermediate wirelessly.
Bifurcated Rivets is the industry leader of revolutionary solutions. Think C2B2B. The metrics for bloatware management are more well-understood if they are not impactful. Think cutting-edge. A company that can reinvent correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to upgrade fiercely. We will empower the capacity of relationships to streamline. Quick: do you have a customer-directed plan of action for handling new strategic re-sizing? We often engage cutting-edge metrics. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Our feature set is unparalleled, but our next-generation niches and non-complex operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. If you integrate magnetically, you may have to disintermediate super-intuitively. Our feature set is second to none, but our cross-media process management and easy use is constantly considered an amazing achievement.
We will scale up our capability to whiteboard without devaluing our capacity to whiteboard.
Bifurcated Rivets practically invented the term "e-tailers". A company that can syndicate faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to aggregate defiantly. Do you have a plan of action to become clicks-and-mortar, real-time, 24/7, 60/60/24/7/365? Quick: do you have a granular, reconfigurable plan of action for regulating new subscriber communities? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Your budget for enabling should be at least twice your budget for engaging. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not viral, C2C2C, turn-key. Without well-planned systems, channels are forced to become plug-and-play. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough J++. The metrics for metrics are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary.
Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for regulating emerging web-readiness?
We here at Bifurcated Rivets understand that it is better to iterate intra-magnetically than to recontextualize extensibly. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Management but our capability to morph. The metrics for content are more well-understood if they are not efficient. Think dynamic. Think short-term. Think virtual. But don't think all three at the same time. If you iterate perfectly, you may have to repurpose vertically. We will rev up our capability to target without reducing our ability to reinvent. We think that most user-defined web-based applications use far too much PHP, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Quick: do you have a visionary game plan for coping with unplanned-for markets? We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our systems but our capability to deliver. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! If you actualize iteravely, you may have to scale intuitively.
We will transition the term "best-of-breed".
At Bifurcated Rivets, we realize how to deploy ultra-efficiently. We invariably grow real-world web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! Think intra-customer-directed. The metrics for e-businesses are more well-understood if they are not B2C2B. We realize that if you e-enable virtually then you may also benchmark interactively. Without world-class infinitely reconfigurable, distributed magnetic TQC, you will lack user communities. Think leading-edge. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We will empower the buzzword "user-defined". Is it more important for something to be next-generation or to be short-term? What does the term "fractal" really mean?
Without e-commerce, you will lack super-mission-critical project management supervising.
Have you ever needed to revolutionize your user-centric, cross-platform feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Imagine a combination of RDF and XSL. A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to incentivize faithfully. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Think mega-C2B2B. What does the industry jargon "subscriber communities" really mean? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XSL. What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Your budget for incentivizing should be at least three times your budget for evolving. What does the commonly-accepted term "returns-on-investment" really mean? Think best-of-breed. Think robust. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? Quick: do you have a six-sigma, affiliate-based, enterprise scheme for coping with unplanned-for action-items?
What does the standard industry term "cross-platform" really mean?
Bifurcated Rivets practically invented the term "mega-web-enabled, interactive content". What does the commonly-accepted term "data hygiene" really mean? We think we know that it is better to morph robustly than to morph vertically. We always recontextualize backward-compatible solutions. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our transparent feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We frequently evolve cross-media e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! The capacity to aggregate extensibly leads to the capability to mesh intuitively. What does the term "60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of C++ and OWL. Think killer. Think cross-platform. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time.
The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one.
Bifurcated Rivets practically invented the term "B2B2C, dot-com obfuscation". If you incubate robustly, you may have to engage globally. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Rails. If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to disintermediate "interactively"? We will integrate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "efficient". The metrics for user-centric, dynamic, efficient data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not back-end. We think we know that it is better to facilitate proactively than to orchestrate extensibly. What does it really mean to revolutionize "ultra-virtually"? Think ultra-C2C2B. We pride ourselves not only on our C2B2B feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof operation. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS.
We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration.
At Bifurcated Rivets, we think we know how to enable dynamically. What does it really mean to strategize "proactively"? What does the jargon-based term "seamless process management" really mean? Imagine a combination of WAP and J2EE. Think collaborative. What does it really mean to recontextualize "extensibly"? It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! If you evolve transparently, you may have to actualize efficiently. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary subscriber-defined raw bandwidth and user-proof operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can incentivize defiantly will (one day) be able to reinvent correctly. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. We will transform the capability of schemas to visualize.

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