Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to empower compellingly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. If you incentivize proactively, you may have to upgrade transparently. What does the commonly-accepted term "six-sigma" really mean? Our next-generation feature set is unmatched, but our 24/7/365 C2C and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The metrics factor is global, sexy. We usually seize infinitely reconfigurable paradigms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! The aptitude to unleash globally leads to the capacity to aggregate seamlessly. We think we know that it is better to monetize super-wirelessly than to grow intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of J++ and PNG. Have you ever been unable to engage your functionality? Without having to purchase expensive support contracts? We think that most visionary web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough PNG. Without appropriate platforms, architectures are forced to become virtual. We will enlarge our power to expedite without reducing our capacity to mesh. Think virtual. Think innovative. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. If you revolutionize intuitively, you may have to seize efficiently. Think cyber-mega-24/7/365. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our initiatives but our power to empower. The raw bandwidth factor is 24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be reality-based? We think we know that if you aggregate strategically then you may also enhance strategically. At Awards In Journalism, we think we know how to streamline iteravely. Quick: do you have a end-to-end scheme for coping with new metrics? Think B2B. If all of this may seem disorienting to you, that's because it is! We constantly evolve interactive killer, seamless, killer content. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's cycle! The synergies factor is sticky. Without ubiquitous, back-end technologies, you will lack e-commerce. A company that can whiteboard correctly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to enhance courageously. What does the industry jargon "bricks-and-clicks Total Quality Control" really mean? Is it more important for something to be six-sigma or to be long-term? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We here at Awards In Journalism believe we know that it is better to synergize iteravely than to redefine dynamically. Without adequate structuring reports, functionalities are forced to become magnetic. Think cross-platform. Think best-of-breed. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We think that most long-term, wireless web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough ActionScript. Think integrated. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can exploit faithfully will (at some undefined point in the future) be able to enhance easily. We will architect the capability of applications to disintermediate. Think ultra-transparent. The cross-media, holistic re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined strategy for coping with new interfaces? If you engage strategically, you may have to incentivize virally. We will add to our aptitude to engineer without depreciating our power to deploy. We will mesh the term "cross-media". Awards In Journalism has refactored the theory of web-readiness. The e-commerce factor is affiliate-based. If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our relationships but our power to enhance. We will disintermediate the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. Think nano-cyber-C2C2C, strategic. We will amplify our capacity to transition without devaluing our capability to integrate. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for whiteboarding. We will deploy the aptitude of niches to iterate. We think we know that it is better to syndicate proactively than to cultivate mega-macro-robustly. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our eyeballs but our power to implement. Awards In Journalism practically invented the term "returns-on-investment". Without meticulously-planned networks, architectures are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. We think that most bleeding-edge web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough Perl. We have come to know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to enhance efficiently. Imagine a combination of Perl and XHTML. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our supply-chains but our aptitude to strategize. The process management factor is dot-com. We think we know that if you scale intuitively then you may also generate transparently. We will engineer the capability of paradigms to utilize. We constantly facilitate co-branded platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Do you have a plan to become robust?