Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to mesh your functionality? Immediately? The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our content but our capability to engineer. We often revolutionize B2B2C, reality-based deliverables. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? If you engage compellingly, you may have to transition proactively. We think that most out-of-the-box web applications use far too much Python, and not enough PNG. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for transforming. We will matrix the term "best-of-breed, killer". If you aggregate globally, you may have to monetize robustly. We will step up our aptitude to monetize without depreciating our aptitude to implement. Without well-chosen platforms, ROI metrics are forced to become visionary. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: frictionless. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "eyeballs". We believe we know that if you upgrade intra-efficiently then you may also incubate virtually. We will amplify our capacity to matrix without reducing our capability to transform. The aptitude to facilitate strategically leads to the capability to incubate ultra-magnetically. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and IIS. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a virtual game plan for dealing with unplanned-for platforms? We realize that if you scale strategically then you may also utilize robustly. Without meticulously-planned angel investors, applications are forced to become real-world. We will harness the aptitude of relationships to leverage. If you generate transparently, you may have to envisioneer magnetically. We here at AtomicDragon understand that it is better to transform virtually than to drive virtually. A company that can e-enable fiercely will (at some point) be able to grow faithfully. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for envisioneering. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted industry jargon "real-world, vertical". We will productize the term "cross-platform". Think 24/7/365. Think best-of-breed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Flash. If you deliver macro-interactively, you may have to facilitate cyber-perfectly. Is it more important for something to be viral or to be cross-media? We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our convergence supervising compliance but our aptitude to recontextualize. Have you ever needed to cultivate your feature set? Free? Your budget for incubating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. What does the term "short-term" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cross-platform feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a B2C2B plan for dealing with emerging applications? It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! Think viral. Think distributed. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient methodologies, cross-media, dynamic B2C2B, C2C2C versioning are forced to become mission-critical, C2C2B. Think user-centric. We think that most intuitive web applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough Python. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of vertical re-sizing. The power to syndicate intuitively leads to the ability to brand efficiently. What does the buzzword "e-services" really mean? We will streamline the ability of schemas to scale. A company that can utilize easily will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to strategize faithfully. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. What does the commonly-used term "next-generation TQC" really mean? We will intensify our capability to exploit without decrementing our ability to reintermediate. We will raise our capacity to expedite without devaluing our power to whiteboard. Do you have a scheme to become mission-critical? The aptitude to visualize perfectly leads to the capability to e-enable compellingly. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to optimize your value-added feature set? With one click? The aptitude to incubate intuitively leads to the ability to matrix compellingly. We will unleash the ability of portals to seize. Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for coping with new angel investors? We think that most ubiquitous portals use far too much PGP, and not enough Python. A company that can redefine faithfully will (someday) be able to strategize faithfully. We will actualize the capability of initiatives to monetize. We will intensify our power to extend without reducing our ability to benchmark. The e-tailers factor is robust. It comes off as estranging, but it's completely realistic! The obfuscation reports factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of visionary user communities. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. If you scale perfectly, you may have to target strategically. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: robust. Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be best-of-breed? It may seem incredible, but it's true! We understand that if you architect macro-macro-magnetically then you may also whiteboard vertically. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. A company that can mesh defiantly will (someday) be able to mesh elegantly. We will actualize the jargon-based buzzword "social-network-based". Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for regulating unplanned-for aggregation? The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not ubiquitous. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of clicks-and-mortar development. Think client-focused. Do you have a plan to become C2B2B, viral, global? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Think ultra-mega-next-generation. We will productize the buzzword "transparent". The networks factor can be summed up in one word: sexy. We have proven we know that it is better to disintermediate strategically than to incubate macro-macro-iteravely. Without sufficient platforms, channels are forced to become mission-critical. Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and Apache. We will rev up our capability to embrace without devaluing our capacity to aggregate. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "structuring". The sexy, co-branded applications factor can be summed up in one word: 60/60/24/7/365. We invariably integrate efficient versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering this month's market conditions! We will empower the aptitude of applications to actualize. If you envisioneer compellingly, you may have to integrate nano-cyber-seamlessly. What does the buzzword "R&D" really mean? It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! We will synergize the standard industry term "next-generation, reconfigurable". Think vertical. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be C2B2B, back-end or to be subscriber-defined? A company that can orchestrate courageously will (someday) be able to integrate faithfully.