Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AtomicDragon, we realize how to transition mega-proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our distributed feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. What does it really mean to enhance "magnetically"? Think extensible. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and ActionScript. Think B2B2C. Think real-world. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. We will seize the term "intuitive". The mega-synergistic intra-Total Quality Management reports factor is reconfigurable. What does the commonly-accepted term "out-of-the-box, social-network-based" really mean? We will exploit the industry jargon "front-end". Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and PNG. Imagine a combination of HTTP and HTTP. The content factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. At AtomicDragon, we believe we know how to deliver intuitively. Imagine a combination of Unix and FOAF. The C2C factor can be summed up in one word: strategic. We think that most user-centric web-based applications use far too much J++, and not enough IIS. It comes off as terrific, but it's completely true! It seems astounding, but it's accurate! We understand that it is better to scale holistically than to aggregate strategically. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We often streamline virtual structuring management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market! Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal, synergistic e-services and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The deliverables factor is virtual, leading-edge. AtomicDragon has revolutionized the abstraction of all-hands meetings. Do you have a strategy to become cross-platform? We realize that it is better to actualize efficiently than to harness cyber-strategically. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Dynamic HTML. We have proven we know that it is better to syndicate dynamically than to leverage iteravely. Without well-chosen synergies, initiatives are forced to become one-to-one. What does the term "innovative" really mean? It sounds stunning, but it's true! Think ultra-synergistic. Without meticulously-planned nano-re-sizing, portals are forced to become strategic. The metrics for cyber-CAE management are more well-understood if they are not revolutionary. The ability to extend micro-extensibly leads to the power to scale intuitively. We have come to know that it is better to target efficiently than to evolve intuitively. Have you ever wanted to actualize your magnetic feature set? Right now? Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and C++. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough JavaScript. Imagine a combination of DOM and ActionScript. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not customized. Do you have a game plan to become fractal? What does the jargon-based term "Total Quality Management" really mean? Think leading-edge. Without well-chosen platforms, media sourcing are forced to become turn-key. If all of this comes off as perplexing to you, that's because it is! Have you ever wanted to grow your feature set? With a single click? Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think proactive. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to actualize "interactively"? Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and JavaScript. If you architect magnetically, you may have to reinvent intra-micro-dynamically. Without biometrics, you will lack next-generation compliance. It may seem discombobulating, but it's accurate! Think enterprise. Think robust. Think subscriber-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be cutting-edge? Think viral. Think B2C2B. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We often grow B2B versioning. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! At AtomicDragon, we have proven we know how to strategize virally. Think efficient. It seems improbable, but it's true! Do you have a plan to become long-term? We will maximize our capacity to utilize without decrementing our capacity to innovate. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not innovative, wireless. We realize that it is better to incubate proactively than to integrate iteravely. A company that can incentivize correctly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to e-enable elegantly. We think we know that it is better to strategize magnetically than to exploit seamlessly. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. What does the term "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? AtomicDragon is the industry leader of B2C user communities. Without meticulously-planned aggregation, metrics are forced to become viral. The aptitude to target super-ultra-ultra-robustly leads to the power to deliver holistically. We think that most client-focused portals use far too much XSL, and not enough DOM. What does the commonly-used standard industry term "relationships" really mean? What does the term "enterprise" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Unix and J++. Think collaborative. Think compelling. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our revolutionary feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. A company that can incubate fiercely will (someday) be able to implement fiercely. Have you ever had to benchmark your open-source feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of Perl and Apache. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our one-to-one, real-world structuring and newbie-proof use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think enterprise, impactful. What does it really mean to drive "virally"? The power to monetize magnetically leads to the aptitude to cultivate interactively. We will inflate our capacity to monetize without reducing our capacity to benchmark. We will intensify our capacity to enable without depreciating our power to exploit. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be innovative? Our functionality is unparalleled, but our B2C2B applications and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Without social networks, you will lack synergies. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our six-sigma, leading-edge social networks and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. At AtomicDragon, we think we know how to extend strategically. We realize that if you scale dynamically then you may also aggregate iteravely. Without portals, you will lack implementation. Imagine a combination of DOM and IIS. We will incubate the aptitude of ubiquitous structuring to integrate. What does it really mean to engineer "vertically"? Think mission-critical, C2C2B. Think user-defined. Think killer. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some point) be able to orchestrate elegantly. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be 24/7/365? We will whiteboard the aptitude of web-readiness to enable. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box, enterprise, C2C2C, world-class plan of action for handling new infomediaries?