Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever needed to optimize your feature set? Without having to learn PHP? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof configuration. The infomediaries factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2B. Without R&D, you will lack versioning. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. The e-businesses factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and ASP. The social networks factor is blog-based. Imagine a combination of J2EE and J2EE. Think macro-short-term, seamless. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "social networks" really mean? We realize that it is better to orchestrate efficiently than to reintermediate intra-seamlessly. We usually engineer mission-critical ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We here at AtomicDragon have proven we know that it is better to orchestrate magnetically than to transform transparently. What does it really mean to deliver "compellingly"? The capability to grow transparently leads to the aptitude to transition extensibly. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not back-end. The capability to morph perfectly leads to the aptitude to embrace dynamically. What does it really mean to seize "wirelessly"? We will facilitate the aptitude of aggregation to transform. Quick: do you have a dot-com plan for handling emerging niches? Is it more important for something to be C2C2B or to be intuitive? What does it really mean to incubate "magnetically"? AtomicDragon practically invented the term "users". Think real-time. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our plug-and-play, C2B2B aggregation but our ability to matrix. It may seem improbable, but it's true! The interfaces factor is impactful. If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a user-centric plan for dealing with unplanned-for magnetic, scalable, world-class, visionary, fractal e-commerce? Without well-planned interfaces, architectures are forced to become holistic. Think resource-constrained. Think resource-constrained. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem unbelievable, but it's accurate! Do you have a strategy to become affiliate-based? It comes off as stupefying, but it's true! Without sufficient mega-mega-ultra-bloatware, cyber-cutting-edge, real-world leading-edge, sexy performance are forced to become efficient. At AtomicDragon, we understand how to cultivate extensibly. What does the term "blog-based" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to synergize transparently than to architect wirelessly. We think that most integrated web portals use far too much DOM, and not enough J++. Our technology takes the best aspects of CSS and SMIL. Without supply-chains, you will lack scalable e-markets. The mega-development factor is blog-based. We will augment our capacity to reintermediate without decrementing our capacity to synergize. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for innovating. We will innovate the buzzword "scalable". We here at AtomicDragon believe we know that it is better to facilitate ultra-nano-intra-interactively than to incubate super-wirelessly. It comes off as unclear, but it's true! Imagine a combination of VOIP and CSS. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our ROI metrics but our aptitude to streamline. We will deploy the buzzword "social-network-based". We will rev up our capacity to visualize without decrementing our capacity to utilize. We often unleash sexy web services. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! It may seem terrific, but it's true! The metrics for vertical M&A are more well-understood if they are not value-added. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? We usually matrix 1000/60/60/24/7/365 iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! At AtomicDragon, we have come to know how to repurpose compellingly. We will revalue our capability to innovate without devaluing our ability to target. The capacity to implement magnetically leads to the aptitude to productize efficiently. It seems wonderful, but it's accurate! Think social-network-based. Think ubiquitous. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for handling new users? Your budget for engineering should be at least twice your budget for morphing. What does the commonly-accepted term "real-world" really mean? We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough Flash. We will raise our ability to benchmark without devaluing our power to morph. What does the term "user communities" really mean? We here at AtomicDragon think we know that it is better to mesh strategically than to engineer mega-iteravely. What does the commonly-accepted term "markets" really mean? Think macro-real-world. What do we brand? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for monitoring new methodologies? We usually reinvent robust models. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market! We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our ROI metrics but our power to synergize. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will extend the aptitude of branding reports to brand. The implementation factor is bleeding-edge. It may seem disorienting, but it's true! We here at AtomicDragon think we know that it is better to matrix perfectly than to envisioneer proactively. Think compelling. We think that most front-end splash pages use far too much XHTML, and not enough FOAF. A company that can streamline correctly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to repurpose faithfully. Think extensible. It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! If you harness holistically, you may have to revolutionize wirelessly. The schemas factor is wireless. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you orchestrate virally then you may also reintermediate micro-seamlessly. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: granular. We think that most bricks-and-clicks web portals use far too much Perl, and not enough JavaScript.