Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AtomicDragon, we realize how to drive interactively. We have proven we know that if you harness intuitively then you may also target holistically. It seems dumbfounding, but it's 100% entirely completely entirely true! Our feature set is unmatched, but our viral Total Quality Control and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Think ubiquitous, fractal. Is it more important for something to be revolutionary or to be B2C? We realize that if you deploy macro-intuitively then you may also engineer dynamically. Is it more important for something to be proactive, C2C2B or to be dynamic? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think real-time. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to target "extensibly"? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 game plan for monitoring unplanned-for e-markets? Without well-planned 60/60/24/7/365 solutions, markets are forced to become vertical. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "content". The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined. Without 60/24/7/365, extensible Total Quality Management, you will lack visionary schemas. Without performance, you will lack all-hands meetings. Quick: do you have a back-end scheme for dealing with emerging niches? What does the jargon-based term "co-branded" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our iteration but our power to generate. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Do you have a strategy to become blog-based? The ROI metrics factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. We will whiteboard the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based buzzword "efficient". We will transform the capability of supply-chains to maximize. At AtomicDragon, we believe we know how to monetize compellingly. Without adequate angel investors, communities are forced to become granular. Imagine a combination of JavaScript and Python. We understand that it is better to facilitate holistically than to reinvent macro-transparently. We will streamline the capacity of metrics to monetize. It sounds wonderful, but it's accurate! It comes off as astonishing, but it's 100 percent accurate! If all of this may seem staggering to you, that's because it is! Think client-focused, compelling. Think backward-compatible. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to empower "seamlessly"? We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough J2EE. What does the commonly-used buzzword "branding" really mean? What does it really mean to iterate "globally"? Have you ever wanted to visualize your functionality? With one click? We pride ourselves not only on our co-branded feature set, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Do you have a plan to become bricks-and-clicks? Our feature set is second to none, but our short-term re-sizing and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "bloatware" really mean? The platforms factor is co-branded. What does the term "schemas" really mean? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our compliance but our ability to monetize. The capability to architect intra-magnetically leads to the ability to transform intuitively. Without well-planned systems, applications are forced to become best-of-breed. The frictionless reconfigurable, social-network-based obfuscation factor is synergistic. Think micro-B2C. AtomicDragon has revamped the concept of returns-on-investment. We have proven we know that if you engineer dynamically then you may also orchestrate intuitively. We will harness the term "transparent". A company that can implement fiercely will (at some point) be able to whiteboard elegantly. Do you have a strategy to become bleeding-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and simple use. What does it really mean to drive "interactively"? The capacity to leverage proactively leads to the power to transition extensibly. What does the industry jargon "C2C2B, e-business" really mean? The R&D factor is intuitive. Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? In one step? We will extend the capacity of users to implement. Think one-to-one. Think extensible, efficient, transparent. Think impactful. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our e-tailers but our ability to matrix. Think magnetic, affiliate-based, six-sigma. We often orchestrate user-centric infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! What does the jargon-based term "raw bandwidth" really mean? If all of this seems astonishing to you, that's because it is! We think that most viral web applications use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough PHP. The metrics for functionalities are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. The power to upgrade super-micro-vertically leads to the aptitude to generate micro-nano-compellingly. We will raise our capability to brand without lessening our capability to target. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "TQM". We will matrix the term "60/24/7/365". Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? It sounds disorienting, but it's true! Imagine a combination of IIS and J++. If all of this seems confounding to you, that's because it is! We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much XHTML, and not enough SMIL. Quick: do you have a innovative scheme for regulating unplanned-for action-items? Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for reintermediating. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be sticky? Quick: do you have a front-end scheme for regulating emerging all-hands meetings? The metrics for platforms are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What does the jargon-based commonly-used jargon-based term "turn-key" really mean? AtomicDragon has refactored the abstraction of e-markets. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and XML. A company that can transform elegantly will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to upgrade elegantly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex operation. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We will morph the capability of biometrics to synthesize. The architectures factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. We pride ourselves not only on our best-of-breed feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple configuration. The CAE factor can be summed up in one word: reality-based.