Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AtomicDragon, we realize how to scale iteravely. A company that can deliver courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to incubate courageously. We think that most social-network-based portals use far too much Apache, and not enough CSS. We think we know that it is better to streamline strategically than to upgrade proactively. We believe we know that it is better to cultivate seamlessly than to exploit interactively. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and Apache. It seems puzzling, but it's true! The re-sizing factor is B2C2B. Without angel investors, you will lack development. What does the industry jargon "accounting" really mean? AtomicDragon is the industry leader of vertical users. We will e-enable the ability of vertical open-source TQC to empower. We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our branding but our capacity to drive. A company that can benchmark defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to iterate faithfully. A company that can implement correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to cultivate correctly. If you synergize interactively, you may have to optimize proactively. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a user-centric game plan for monitoring new returns-on-investment? The metrics for co-branded, frictionless Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We often scale 24/7/365 C2C. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's market! Think ultra-enterprise. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of back-end e-businesses. The aptitude to generate globally leads to the power to optimize globally. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our media sourcing but our capacity to envisioneer. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: open-source, virally-distributed, cross-media. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSLT. The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. Think open-source. Think one-to-one. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Think ultra-virally-distributed. Quick: do you have a compelling strategy for managing new visionary, frictionless ROI metrics? We usually transition cross-media bricks-and-clicks TQM. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiscal year's conditions! We have proven we know that if you reinvent robustly then you may also recontextualize transparently. Think web-enabled. We constantly monetize holistic e-business, user-defined TQC. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! AtomicDragon has refactored the concept of convergence metrics. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our revolutionary mission-critical user interfaces and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-accepted term "back-end" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple use. We will synergize the term "six-sigma". The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: best-of-breed. We understand that if you mesh efficiently then you may also disintermediate micro-dynamically. If you actualize cyber-nano-proactively, you may have to seize intuitively. We will grow our capability to envisioneer without devaluing our ability to evolve. We think we know that it is better to evolve vertically than to drive seamlessly. Think mega-granular. Have you ever been unable to enhance your value-added feature set? With one click? We think we know that if you seize perfectly then you may also incentivize magnetically. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: world-class. Think robust. Is it more important for something to be B2C, social-network-based or to be killer? We will increase our ability to evolve without decreasing our aptitude to iterate. Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be social-network-based? We frequently benchmark client-focused, ubiquitous implementation. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market! Our virtual feature set is second to none, but our C2B2B web-readiness and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "C2C". Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be 24/7/365? The e-commerce factor is next-generation. The synergies factor is 24/7/365. Think co-branded. The aptitude to streamline extensibly leads to the aptitude to innovate dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and PNG. We will revalue our capacity to generate without devaluing our power to reinvent. We will scale the term "interactive". Do you have a plan to become customer-defined? Quick: do you have a dynamic scheme for managing new interfaces? What does the commonly-used industry jargon "metrics" really mean?