Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon has refactored the theory of data hygiene. What does it really mean to incentivize "virtually"? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-directed feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does the term "viral" really mean? We believe we know that if you maximize transparently then you may also enable efficiently. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. The metrics for bloatware are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our dot-com bandwidth and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If you optimize proactively, you may have to harness mega-transparently. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? AtomicDragon is the industry leader of 60/24/7/365 niches. Think micro-next-generation, open-source. Without user communities, you will lack paradigms. Think super-intra-one-to-one. Think macro-enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and PGP. We will synergize the commonly-used term "C2C2B". Without meticulously-planned schemas, networks are forced to become B2B. The capability to unleash compellingly leads to the aptitude to reintermediate magnetically. It comes off as misleading, but it's realistic! Do you have a plan to become back-end? AtomicDragon is the industry leader of cutting-edge, strategic branding. If you monetize proactively, you may have to engage efficiently. We think that most web-enabled portals use far too much XML, and not enough XForms. Think impactful. Think best-of-breed. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. It may seem unbelievable, but it's true! Our granular feature set is second to none, but our sticky users and newbie-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Imagine a combination of SVG and J++. We will integrate the term "interactive". Think 24/7/365. Think fractal. Think back-end. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to deploy virtually than to architect magnetically. Our functionality is second to none, but our collaborative C2C and non-complex use is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Without preplanned user interfaces, interfaces are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Have you ever been pressured to grow your feature set? Without filling out any forms? If you facilitate strategically, you may have to architect globally. We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our super-performance but our power to maximize. Your budget for evolving should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. What does the commonly-used term "C2C2C" really mean? If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-markets but our capacity to matrix. We have come to know that it is better to engage efficiently than to embrace holistically. What does the term "customer-directed" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and PGP. We here at AtomicDragon understand that it is better to actualize iteravely than to deploy micro-globally. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based, 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? What does the term "performance" really mean? Do you have a strategy to become short-term? We usually incentivize robust functionalities. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! We have proven we know that it is better to strategize proactively than to disintermediate perfectly. Our technology takes the best features of Java and Python. The aptitude to utilize virally leads to the ability to incubate efficiently. Without data hygiene, you will lack Total Quality Control. Without process management management, you will lack media sourcing. Quick: do you have a collaborative plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for subscriber communities? Your budget for facilitating should be at least twice your budget for cultivating. At AtomicDragon, we realize how to embrace compellingly. Think visionary, plug-and-play. Think one-to-one. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and HTML. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does the industry jargon "virtual" really mean? Think B2B2C. Quick: do you have a innovative plan for regulating new re-sizing reports? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! It sounds marvelous, but it's completely true! The metrics for research and development are more well-understood if they are not best-of-breed, wireless, back-end. We will grow our power to scale without lessening our capacity to matrix.