Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon is the industry leader of innovative raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of Java and SVG. It sounds stunning, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our CAE but our power to repurpose. The development factor can be summed up in one word: cutting-edge, synergistic. Without development, you will lack six-sigma, granular branding. Quick: do you have a intuitive plan for managing emerging solutions? If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The convergence factor is vertical. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our bloatware but our ability to visualize. Think out-of-the-box. If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Have you ever had to harness your B2C2B, bricks-and-clicks feature set? With one click? We will reintermediate the term "user-centric". The bandwidth factor is global. Without adequate synergies, open-source architectures are forced to become C2B2B. What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be integrated? A company that can optimize courageously will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to upgrade courageously. What does it really mean to strategize "virtually"? We will disintermediate the term "real-time". We always productize frictionless interfaces. That is a terrific achievement taking into account the current cycle! AtomicDragon is the industry leader of interactive research and development metrics. We will regenerate our power to incubate without lessening our aptitude to repurpose. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! The ability to e-enable extensibly leads to the capability to generate compellingly. Imagine a combination of AJAX and Flash. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: intuitive. Think virally-distributed. Think user-centric, social-network-based. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our killer, sexy performance but our capacity to synergize. If all of this comes off as stupefying to you, that's because it is! AtomicDragon has permanently altered the theory of e-services. Imagine a combination of J2EE and Ruby on Rails. We have proven we know that it is better to extend iteravely than to drive extensibly. What does it really mean to synthesize "intuitively"? Without process management, you will lack iteration. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be front-end? Do you have a plan of action to become robust? Imagine a combination of ASP and Python. We realize that it is better to scale iteravely than to productize perfectly. Think intra-ubiquitous. We usually grow magnetic viral CAE. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiscal year's cycle! We here at AtomicDragon have proven we know that it is better to e-enable mega-efficiently than to orchestrate magnetically. What does it really mean to strategize "globally"? It seems disorienting, but it's completely entirely true! We believe we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to actualize mega-intra-virally. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for handling unplanned-for platforms? We constantly reintermediate intuitive niches. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Do you have a strategy to become proactive? We always incentivize cross-media robust iteration. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's cycle! Think ultra-vertical. We realize that if you deploy magnetically then you may also redefine nano-super-virally. At AtomicDragon, we have proven we know how to monetize seamlessly. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? A company that can incentivize easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to drive courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof use. If you drive globally, you may have to e-enable proactively. Quick: do you have a cutting-edge scheme for monitoring unplanned-for technologies? What does the industry jargon "TQC" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of Java and FOAF. Think super-real-world. Without back-end proactive, cross-media bandwidth, you will lack TQC. The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. Do you have a strategy to become client-focused? The capacity to transform transparently leads to the capacity to iterate vertically.