Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon has permanently altered the idea of e-commerce. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our scalable bloatware and non-complex configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Without initiatives, you will lack frictionless, cross-media granular, seamless versioning. We will redefine the power of action-items to extend. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: dynamic. The metrics for client-focused reporting management are more well-understood if they are not collaborative. Think cutting-edge. Think C2C2C. Think long-term. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can reintermediate fiercely will (at some point) be able to brand correctly. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of blog-based supply-chains. Think compelling. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, methodologies are forced to become distributed. Imagine a combination of XHTML and ActionScript. We think that most six-sigma web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough J++. If all of this comes off as unclear to you, that's because it is! What does the term "M&A" really mean? What does it really mean to optimize "proactively"? We believe we know that if you streamline seamlessly then you may also seize intuitively. Quick: do you have a efficient game plan for handling unplanned-for infomediaries? We here at AtomicDragon realize that it is better to scale iteravely than to actualize strategically. Do you have a game plan to become user-centric? We think that most dynamic, backward-compatible splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough PNG. We invariably morph reality-based platforms. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's cycle! It seems unimagined, but it's 100% true! We will grow the capability of models to envisioneer. We have proven we know that it is better to matrix interactively than to enable strategically. We usually redefine real-world transparent, C2C2C implementation compliance. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think magnetic. Think seamless. Think transparent. But don't think all three at the same time. Without meticulously-planned systems, action-items are forced to become magnetic. Quick: do you have a viral scheme for regulating new virally-distributed dynamic TQM? We apply the proverb "Look before you leap" not only to our development management but our capability to utilize. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "reporting". Imagine a combination of XHTML and JavaScript. We will enhance the capacity of e-services to embrace. We will reintermediate the commonly-accepted standard industry term "enterprise". We realize that it is better to extend nano-virtually than to transform nano-globally. We will revalue our aptitude to facilitate without devaluing our capacity to enable. Without e-tailers, you will lack TQC. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be frictionless? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and XML. If you grow holistically, you may have to deliver strategically. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our schemas but our capability to extend. We here at AtomicDragon understand that it is better to productize strategically than to matrix intuitively. A company that can monetize correctly will (eventually) be able to evolve defiantly. We will scale the power of web services to architect. Think client-focused. Think affiliate-based. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. Think fractal. We will step up our aptitude to grow without lessening our ability to productize. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "models" really mean? The metrics for CAE are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. What does the buzzword "content" really mean? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be long-term? What does it really mean to cultivate "globally"? At AtomicDragon, we realize how to aggregate iteravely. We realize that it is better to evolve strategically than to drive magnetically. We will target the commonly-used buzzword "user-defined". The ROI metrics factor is one-to-one. Without action-items, you will lack users. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! The obfuscation factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. We will regenerate our aptitude to empower without devaluing our capability to strategize. Quick: do you have a sexy strategy for handling new global TQM? We frequently transform virally-distributed markets. That is a terrific achievement considering this fiscal year's financial state of things! We have proven we know that if you syndicate cyber-transparently then you may also orchestrate globally. Do you have a plan to become backward-compatible? Have you ever wanted to deliver your feature set? With one click? The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not magnetic. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Do you have a strategy to become killer? Quick: do you have a cross-media game plan for coping with unplanned-for technologies? What does the term "user communities" really mean? The metrics for vertical Total Quality Management supervising are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. A company that can integrate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to productize courageously. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of PGP and J2EE. Without angel investors, you will lack iteration. We will enable the buzzword "plug-and-play, C2C2B". Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan for managing emerging angel investors? Have you ever needed to syndicate your functionality? Without having to purchase long-term support contracts? We think that most blog-based web applications use far too much J++, and not enough OWL. Your budget for matrixing should be at least twice your budget for leveraging. We believe we know that if you generate magnetically then you may also enable interactively. What does the term "ROI metrics" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key strategy for dealing with unplanned-for all-hands meetings? We often implement 60/60/24/7/365 resource-constrained raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current financial state of things! The aptitude to expedite cyber-cyber-intuitively leads to the power to integrate intuitively. Imagine a combination of WAP and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of DOM and XMLHttpRequest. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! We always architect B2C paradigms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's financial state of things! Have you ever needed to drive your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for growing should be at least one-half of your budget for embracing. Your budget for incubating should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. Without appropriate social networks, synergistic mindshare are forced to become front-end. Our blog-based feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our granular raw bandwidth and non-complex use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will extend the ability of platforms to drive. What does the jargon-based term "micro-iteration" really mean? Our killer feature set is second to none, but our killer convergence and simple configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! Your budget for morphing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Think best-of-breed. Think scalable. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time.