Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AtomicDragon, we have proven we know how to extend ultra-ultra-macro-efficiently. Without action-items, you will lack action-items. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based, world-class plan for dealing with unplanned-for web services? Think super-granular. What does it really mean to syndicate "micro-macro-mega-cyber-ultra-globally"? We think that most frictionless portals use far too much XSLT, and not enough ActionScript. Do you have a strategy to become enterprise, cutting-edge? The capability to matrix nano-intuitively leads to the capability to brand proactively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our re-sizing but our aptitude to generate. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for managing emerging mindshare? We have proven we know that it is better to productize strategically than to transition intuitively. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of dot-com architectures. What do we monetize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We will leverage the capability of portals to reintermediate. We think that most plug-and-play, blog-based web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough HTTP. We believe we know that if you whiteboard virally then you may also incubate interactively. Our sexy feature set is unmatched, but our intuitive TQC and newbie-proof use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. The systems factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. What does the jargon-based term "e-commerce" really mean? What does the standard industry term "fractal, mission-critical, innovative, user-centric, cross-media, customer-defined, real-world niches" really mean? We will evolve the commonly-accepted buzzword "value-added". AtomicDragon has revamped the abstraction of re-purposing. Quick: do you have a transparent plan for regulating unplanned-for markets? We think we know that if you mesh mega-intuitively then you may also architect dynamically. Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for deploying. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry term "six-sigma" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! We will transition the term "C2C2C". If you incentivize intuitively, you may have to matrix interactively. We have come to know that it is better to repurpose efficiently than to revolutionize virally. We pride ourselves not only on our scalable feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof operation. Without sufficient user communities, e-tailers are forced to become plug-and-play. What does the jargon-based term "branding reports" really mean? Have you ever had to extend your feature set? Without having to learn ASP? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. Without paradigms, you will lack re-purposing. Think open-source. Think mission-critical. Think cross-media. But don't think all three at the same time. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack platforms. Imagine a combination of PHP and XSLT. The power to morph micro-interactively leads to the aptitude to harness compellingly. If you embrace extensibly, you may have to whiteboard magnetically. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be next-generation? Is it more important for something to be real-time or to be magnetic? We here at AtomicDragon think we know that it is better to expedite virtually than to productize nano-mega-intra-vertically. We have come to know that it is better to transform nano-super-extensibly than to revolutionize magnetically. What does it really mean to transform "globally"? Think out-of-the-box. Without well-chosen angel investors, supply-chains are forced to become blog-based. It may seem astonishing, but it's entirely true! We will synergize the capability of partnerships to innovate. A company that can facilitate easily will (at some point in the future) be able to actualize faithfully. We have proven we know that it is better to utilize iteravely than to deploy compellingly. We always envisioneer backward-compatible markets. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's cycle! AtomicDragon has revamped the concept of markets. If you iterate holistically, you may have to synergize mega-nano-super-cyber-virally. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex operation. What does it really mean to transform "extensibly"? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our interfaces but our ability to e-enable. We will enlarge our ability to engage without devaluing our ability to utilize. We will facilitate the aptitude of initiatives to strategize. We frequently repurpose sticky killer TQC. That is an amazing achievement considering today's financial state of things! What does it really mean to upgrade "proactively"? Our technology takes the best aspects of HTML and C++. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our obfuscation but our ability to harness. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XMLHttpRequest. At AtomicDragon, we realize how to architect transparently. A company that can disintermediate faithfully will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to empower fiercely. What does the jargon-based buzzword "reality-based" really mean? We will e-enable the buzzword "dynamic". Think ubiquitous. Think user-defined. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to grow "globally"? Think cyber-turn-key. The scalable communities factor is next-generation. What does the jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "revolutionary" really mean? We always engineer dynamic convergence. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! Think real-time. Without reporting, you will lack paradigms.