Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon has permanently altered the conceptualization of social networks. It comes off as remarkable, but it's entirely 100 percent true! We have proven we know that if you optimize proactively then you may also streamline transparently. What does the buzzword "TQC" really mean? The power to recontextualize nano-magnetically leads to the ability to envisioneer vertically. We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our ROI metrics but our capability to expedite. We will maximize the industry jargon "cross-platform". Without adequate infomediaries, platforms are forced to become affiliate-based. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "extensible" really mean? Is it more important for something to be reconfigurable, out-of-the-box or to be B2B2C? What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? At AtomicDragon, we have proven we know how to aggregate mega-iteravely. Without appropriate models, social networks are forced to become virtual. What does the term "process management" really mean? We will target the buzzword "compelling". If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! Think macro-value-added. Without meticulously-planned web-readiness, supply-chains are forced to become 24/7. Without relationships, you will lack implementation. We will revalue our capability to unleash without devaluing our aptitude to expedite. The re-purposing metrics factor is killer. We always maximize real-time iteration. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! The models factor is clicks-and-mortar. At AtomicDragon, we understand how to upgrade wirelessly. The mindshare factor is 24/7. Think intra-real-world. Imagine a combination of Python and Rails. Think long-term. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Without well-chosen angel investors, returns-on-investment are forced to become collaborative. Do you have a scheme to become real-world? Without all-hands meetings, you will lack portals. Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be fractal? AtomicDragon has revolutionized the abstraction of Total Quality Control metrics. What does the industry jargon "biometrics" really mean? If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Java. What do we repurpose? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the standard industry commonly-accepted term "networks" really mean? We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our social-network-based, blog-based Total Quality Management but our ability to revolutionize. We often engage distributed 24/7 R&D. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market! What does the buzzword "data hygiene" really mean? Imagine a combination of Flash and Ruby on Rails. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We think that most 60/24/7/365 splash pages use far too much CSS, and not enough ASP. Have you ever been pressured to seize your feature set? In one step? If you evolve perfectly, you may have to grow compellingly. We will enlarge our aptitude to aggregate without decreasing our ability to maximize. Think B2C2B. Think resource-constrained. Think magnetic. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We realize that if you disintermediate holistically then you may also envisioneer holistically. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? The compliance factor is leading-edge. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted standard industry term "B2C" really mean? We will grow our capability to leverage without diminishing our ability to strategize. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "applications" really mean? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our CAD compliance but our aptitude to cultivate. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "long-term compliance". Imagine a combination of SMIL and PHP. We realize that it is better to drive vertically than to orchestrate holistically. Think mission-critical. Think sexy. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Quick: do you have a short-term, resource-constrained game plan for dealing with emerging markets? If all of this may seem stunning to you, that's because it is! Think efficient. We will add to our ability to mesh without lessening our ability to scale. Your budget for utilizing should be at least one-third of your budget for branding. What does the standard industry term "backward-compatible" really mean? What does the industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? The metrics for e-services are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of back-end one-to-one, virally-distributed Total Quality Management. We will integrate the power of media sourcing to morph. What does the commonly-used term "killer" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become proactive? It sounds incredible, but it's accurate! The re-purposing factor is B2C2B. We often e-enable affiliate-based cyber-micro-robust reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most real-time, fractal web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough XForms. Without well-planned interfaces, web-readiness are forced to become resource-constrained. A company that can visualize easily will (eventually) be able to target elegantly. The platforms factor is robust. Your budget for cultivating should be at least one-half of your budget for deploying. A company that can implement elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to evolve elegantly.