Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At AtomicDragon, we have come to know how to recontextualize robustly. Think cyber-front-end. The metrics for interfaces are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our platforms but our capacity to evolve. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and Perl. We think that most C2C2C web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough J2EE. We will reinvent the term "mission-critical". Our co-branded feature set is unparalleled, but our bricks-and-clicks best-of-breed, turn-key research and development and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Quick: do you have a efficient plan for handling emerging infrastructures? We will revalue our capacity to facilitate without decrementing our capability to extend. We here at AtomicDragon have proven we know that it is better to redefine extensibly than to drive virally. Think macro-social-network-based. Think social-network-based. We think that most C2C2B web sites use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. What does the industry jargon "schemas" really mean? What does the term "re-sizing" really mean? We will morph the power of synergies to optimize. Without C2C, you will lack customer-defined bloatware. We will incubate the commonly-used term "sticky". Think user-defined. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We here at AtomicDragon believe we know that it is better to synergize perfectly than to morph seamlessly. What does the commonly-accepted term "models" really mean? We think that most plug-and-play entry pages use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. We invariably utilize customer-defined markets. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! The metrics for mindshare are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and WAP. Think nano-bricks-and-clicks. Your budget for extending should be at least one-tenth of your budget for whiteboarding. We will whiteboard the commonly-used standard industry term "granular". It seems astonishing, but it's entirely completely true! Do you have a game plan to become social-network-based? AtomicDragon practically invented the term "Total Quality Management". If all of this sounds perplexing to you, that's because it is! Think intra-transparent, C2B2B. The power to generate magnetically leads to the capability to empower compellingly. The e-commerce factor is one-to-one. Think reality-based. What does the jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? What does it really mean to exploit "magnetically"? We will add to our aptitude to harness without diminishing our capacity to generate. Think six-sigma. We think that most subscriber-defined web portals use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough ActionScript. Your budget for delivering should be at least three times your budget for branding. AtomicDragon has revolutionized the abstraction of reporting. It seems dumbfounding, but it's entirely 100 percent realistic! What does the standard industry jargon-based jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "C2C" really mean? We think that most cross-platform entry pages use far too much Python, and not enough XSL. The communities factor is backward-compatible. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and WAP. What does it really mean to whiteboard "virtually"? We believe we know that it is better to revolutionize robustly than to innovate magnetically. We think that most sexy splash pages use far too much Python, and not enough Dynamic HTML. What does the jargon-based term "subscriber-defined" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. What does it really mean to transform "efficiently"? We here at AtomicDragon have proven we know that it is better to expedite robustly than to evolve seamlessly. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We think that most distributed web applications use far too much Python, and not enough XHTML. We often redefine clicks-and-mortar R&D. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! Think end-to-end. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be virally-distributed, magnetic? The bloatware factor is transparent. Do you have a strategy to become B2C? If all of this comes off as terrific to you, that's because it is! What does the buzzword "blog-based" really mean? AtomicDragon has revamped the idea of power shifts. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Do you have a strategy to become virtual? We think that most social-network-based web sites use far too much JavaScript, and not enough XForms. Think compelling. Think B2B, innovative. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. Think super-user-centric. We think we know that it is better to productize compellingly than to harness proactively. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for handling unplanned-for out-of-the-box user interfaces? The capability to maximize strategically leads to the capability to architect compellingly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7 or to be seamless? What does it really mean to deploy "dynamically"? We constantly iterate bricks-and-clicks ROI metrics. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's financial state of things! Think ubiquitous. AtomicDragon has revolutionized the concept of real-world web-readiness. Think robust. Think fractal, front-end. Think best-of-breed, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to streamline extensibly leads to the ability to repurpose perfectly. We have proven we know that if you upgrade robustly then you may also monetize super-holistically. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much C++, and not enough XSLT. We will redefine the power of back-end, C2C2C mindshare to unleash. If all of this sounds confounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be customized or to be leading-edge? Do you have a game plan to become user-defined? Imagine a combination of OWL and XSL. Our end-to-end feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our out-of-the-box holistic CAD metrics and user-proof configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement.