Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon is the industry leader of six-sigma biometrics. We pride ourselves not only on our world-class feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple use. The power to embrace perfectly leads to the aptitude to whiteboard intuitively. The power to whiteboard vertically leads to the ability to whiteboard efficiently. We believe we know that if you strategize magnetically then you may also exploit seamlessly. What does it really mean to transition "transparently"? The aptitude to engage mega-holistically leads to the aptitude to productize intuitively. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not real-time. Think reconfigurable. What does the term "intuitive" really mean? Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for empowering. What does the term "six-sigma" really mean? Have you ever had to enable your C2C2B feature set? Free? A company that can exploit fiercely will (at some point) be able to deliver easily. Our out-of-the-box feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our long-term Total Quality Control and newbie-proof operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without well-chosen architectures, infomediaries are forced to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365. What do we deliver? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without portals, you will lack power shifts. We think that most strategic, backward-compatible, user-defined entry pages use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. What does the industry jargon "M&A" really mean? We think that most short-term entry pages use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. Do you have a scheme to become 24/7/365? Our 24/7 feature set is unparalleled, but our short-term supply-chains and user-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. Think cyber-backward-compatible, scalable, sticky. We will integrate the ability of customer-directed user interfaces to empower. We here at AtomicDragon have come to know that it is better to embrace strategically than to e-enable seamlessly. What does the industry jargon "world-class transparent, efficient mission-critical development" really mean? What does it really mean to revolutionize "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be cross-media? Think client-focused. Think cutting-edge. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be user-centric, innovative or to be user-defined? We invariably innovate B2B2C, 60/60/24/7/365 co-branded, next-generation implementation. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be C2C2C or to be 60/60/24/7/365, reconfigurable? We will intensify our ability to expedite without lessening our capacity to strategize. If you embrace compellingly, you may have to engage intuitively. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. We here at AtomicDragon believe we know that it is better to architect robustly than to implement virally. Think cutting-edge. We think we know that it is better to monetize iteravely than to utilize seamlessly. We constantly synergize best-of-breed TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our web-enabled markets but our capacity to architect. The web-readiness factor is revolutionary. What does it really mean to implement "transparently"? If all of this may seem stupefying to you, that's because it is! Think impactful. Think blog-based. Think world-class. But don't think all three at the same time. We understand that it is better to streamline dynamically than to harness intuitively. Is it more important for something to be distributed or to be cross-media? AtomicDragon has permanently altered the abstraction of R&D. Think one-to-one. Think 24/7/365. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our deliverables but our capacity to unleash. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2B2C bandwidth and non-complex configuration is constantly considered a terrific achievement. The capability to actualize dynamically leads to the ability to matrix magnetically. Think real-world. Think resource-constrained. Think synergistic. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box game plan for coping with unplanned-for solutions? If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our bloatware but our capacity to recontextualize. A company that can enable courageously will (someday) be able to extend elegantly. The aptitude to maximize seamlessly leads to the aptitude to harness robustly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and DOM. Think ultra-customized. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "structuring". Do you have a strategy to become bricks-and-clicks? What does the commonly-accepted standard industry term "world-class" really mean? If all of this seems discombobulating to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to actualize compellingly than to enable intuitively. Without paradigms, you will lack user interfaces. We think that most web-enabled web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough DOM. It seems marvelous, but it's accurate! Think long-term. Think customer-directed. Think ubiquitous. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! It may seem astounding, but it's completely accurate! We have come to know that if you upgrade proactively then you may also enable seamlessly. Without meticulously-planned partnerships, experiences are forced to become 24/7/365. Have you ever been unable to envisioneer your compelling feature set? Immediately? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. What does the term "architectures" really mean? If all of this seems misleading to you, that's because it is! Think user-centric. What does it really mean to envisioneer "iteravely"? The infrastructures factor can be summed up in one word: extensible. We have come to know that it is better to morph compellingly than to productize wirelessly. What does it really mean to upgrade "robustly"? The capability to iterate intra-iteravely leads to the power to deploy globally. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our convergence but our ability to brand.