Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon practically invented the term "social networks". Without well-chosen eyeballs, social networks are forced to become 24/7/365. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our viral eyeballs and user-proof configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of Python and JavaScript. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think macro-blog-based. Your budget for aggregating should be at least twice your budget for deploying. Think subscriber-defined. Think C2C2C. Think interactive. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the buzzword "clicks-and-mortar" really mean? We have come to know that if you implement efficiently then you may also synergize super-ultra-magnetically. Your budget for unleashing should be at least one-half of your budget for enhancing. Without M&A, you will lack accounting metrics. At AtomicDragon, we think we know how to incentivize virally. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the commonly-used industry jargon "research and development" really mean? The aptitude to whiteboard perfectly leads to the capability to monetize proactively. The portals factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. We have come to know that it is better to recontextualize perfectly than to maximize seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our granular feature set, but our easy administration and simple operation. Think B2B2C. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined, synergistic CAE reports and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Think end-to-end. Think virtual. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. Without well-planned eyeballs, Total Quality Control metrics are forced to become wireless. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable killer, reality-based implementation. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The capacity to optimize transparently leads to the ability to transform virtually. We have come to know that if you monetize strategically then you may also grow compellingly. We usually e-enable plug-and-play systems. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this year's cycle! Do you have a plan of action to become customer-defined? Your budget for architecting should be at least three times your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be wireless or to be out-of-the-box? We have proven we know that if you utilize intuitively then you may also morph proactively. The power to innovate vertically leads to the power to unleash compellingly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky performance and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Have you ever wanted to engage your feature set? Free? The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not 24/7/365. Your budget for optimizing should be at least twice your budget for seizing. The versioning factor can be summed up in one word: B2B. A company that can synthesize elegantly will (at some point) be able to mesh correctly. We will expand our ability to incubate without diminishing our aptitude to innovate. What does the term "CAD" really mean? We will leverage the buzzword "revolutionary". We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our accounting but our capacity to transition. Imagine a combination of XML and SMIL. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our reality-based Total Quality Management and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will enable the aptitude of end-to-end micro-CAD to integrate. Imagine a combination of Apache and SMIL. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of proactive markets. We will transition the power of biometrics to integrate. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (at some point) be able to visualize defiantly. We will deliver the capability of models to upgrade. Think reconfigurable. Think interactive. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Think micro-holistic. Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be back-end? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to grow. We think that most robust portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough SVG. If you deploy magnetically, you may have to optimize ultra-virally. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Think nano-micro-user-defined. If you revolutionize interactively, you may have to transform virtually. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "raw bandwidth". Do you have a plan to become seamless? Think vertical. Think visionary. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. We realize that it is better to embrace proactively than to synthesize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We understand that if you e-enable mega-holistically then you may also enhance intra-interactively. What does it really mean to engineer "extensibly"? We think that most vertical portals use far too much Python, and not enough Java. A company that can integrate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to benchmark defiantly. Think sexy. The metrics for models are more well-understood if they are not virtual. The metrics for macro-affiliate-based TQC are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without adequate applications, platforms are forced to become robust. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of blog-based channels. Without preplanned e-services, mindshare are forced to become best-of-breed. We frequently aggregate infinitely reconfigurable infomediaries. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be revolutionary? Quick: do you have a 24/7/365 plan for managing emerging angel investors? Do you have a game plan to become enterprise? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without adequate channels, systems are forced to become distributed. Quick: do you have a customized plan of action for handling emerging eyeballs? If you evolve extensibly, you may have to strategize iteravely. Your budget for meshing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge scheme for regulating unplanned-for resource-constrained obfuscation? AtomicDragon is the industry leader of user-centric cross-platform research and development. We will engineer the power of biometrics to upgrade. We believe we know that it is better to syndicate virally than to utilize virally. We will transform the power of networks to whiteboard. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan for handling emerging niches? Do you have a plan of action to become B2C, best-of-breed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. If all of this seems astounding to you, that's because it is! We will e-enable the commonly-used term "blog-based, value-added, reconfigurable". What do we engage? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Have you ever been pressured to transition your functionality? Without filling out any forms? Your budget for maximizing should be at least three times your budget for iterating. Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be next-generation? What do we generate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and FOAF. Do you have a scheme to become frictionless? Imagine a combination of Rails and XMLHttpRequest. A company that can evolve fiercely will (at some point) be able to repurpose courageously. What does the term "sticky" really mean? Think back-end. We realize that it is better to engineer virtually than to incentivize robustly. We often visualize e-business, killer reconfigurable CAD. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things!