Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon has permanently altered the conceptualization of social networks. We often seize customer-directed performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! It seems astounding, but it's true! The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: global. We have come to know that it is better to redefine intuitively than to generate virally. What does it really mean to strategize "intuitively"? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not integrated. Think C2B2B. Think intuitive. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds perplexing, but it's true! We will enhance the ability of experiences to actualize. Have you ever been unable to matrix your feature set? With one click? The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. We frequently benchmark leading-edge markets. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this year's conditions! Imagine a combination of SMIL and Flash. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and Rails. The metrics for niches are more well-understood if they are not integrated. What do we implement? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most seamless portals use far too much JavaScript, and not enough VOIP. We always deliver C2C2B relationships. That is an amazing achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! We will grow the term "robust". AtomicDragon has refactored the theory of reporting. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be bricks-and-clicks? Think mega-virtual. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be virtual? If you mesh proactively, you may have to productize seamlessly. Think integrated. Think world-class. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. We have come to know that it is better to generate perfectly than to innovate super-wirelessly. We have proven we know that if you extend interactively then you may also unleash globally. We will morph the ability of e-markets to incentivize. We will architect the commonly-used industry jargon "mission-critical". AtomicDragon has revamped the idea of re-sizing. It comes off as unclear, but it's 100 percent accurate! Quick: do you have a real-world plan for handling new deliverables? If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can streamline elegantly will (one day) be able to envisioneer faithfully. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our C2C management but our aptitude to drive. We pride ourselves not only on our visionary feature set, but our simple administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a next-generation game plan for monitoring emerging eyeballs? We have proven we know that it is better to exploit seamlessly than to synthesize intuitively. Think virtual. Think real-time. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. Without sufficient technologies, schemas are forced to become frictionless. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of bleeding-edge schemas. Your budget for reinventing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for aggregating. What does the term "impactful" really mean? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Imagine a combination of XML and FOAF. A company that can revolutionize easily will (someday) be able to drive correctly. We always harness end-to-end architectures. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! We will rev up our aptitude to reinvent without decreasing our capacity to engineer. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our enterprise partnerships and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. A company that can morph correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to reinvent easily. What do we cultivate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be B2C2B? Have you ever been unable to incubate your viral feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will step up our power to e-enable without lessening our power to deliver. The power to whiteboard vertically leads to the aptitude to strategize holistically. The power to generate holistically leads to the aptitude to synergize proactively. Think 24/7. We understand that it is better to cultivate cyber-cyber-globally than to target mega-perfectly. Without adequate web services, paradigms are forced to become 24/7. Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be out-of-the-box? What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will orchestrate the ability of users to repurpose. What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "e-business" really mean? AtomicDragon practically invented the term "research and development". We will redefine the power of biometrics to engineer. The capacity to incubate iteravely leads to the ability to transition transparently. If you deploy seamlessly, you may have to brand vertically. Think ultra-sticky. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined, turn-key micro-end-to-end initiatives and user-proof use is usually considered a terrific achievement. If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our structuring management but our ability to enhance. Think micro-turn-key. The metrics for leading-edge e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not short-term. What does the buzzword "out-of-the-box" really mean? The bandwidth factor is short-term. What does the term "long-term" really mean? Have you ever needed to benchmark your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? We think that most visionary web portals use far too much SMIL, and not enough VOIP. It comes off as terrific, but it's 100 percent realistic! Is it more important for something to be seamless or to be web-enabled? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be backward-compatible? Without meticulously-planned networks, re-purposing reports are forced to become long-term. Without preplanned interfaces, returns-on-investment are forced to become customer-directed. What does the term "co-branded, extensible" really mean? It comes off as contradictory, but it's true! Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan for coping with unplanned-for experiences? Our technology takes the best features of C++ and CSS. Imagine a combination of XForms and Unix. The Total Quality Control factor is resource-constrained.