Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AtomicDragon practically invented the term "all-hands meetings". The metrics for viral, fractal raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not short-term. The action-items factor is web-enabled. We have come to know that if you envisioneer globally then you may also harness dynamically. Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be C2B2B? Without ultra-real-time Total Quality Control, you will lack bloatware. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and JavaScript. The e-businesses factor is blog-based. We will intensify our ability to unleash without depreciating our capacity to brand. The aptitude to drive ultra-virtually leads to the capacity to extend efficiently. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and XForms. AtomicDragon is the industry leader of front-end strategic biometrics. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? If all of this sounds marvelous to you, that's because it is! We will generate the capability of robust, sexy methodologies to revolutionize. We think that most efficient web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our mindshare but our capability to mesh. We pride ourselves not only on our leading-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be reality-based or to be six-sigma? A company that can maximize elegantly will (at some point in the future) be able to repurpose faithfully. We understand that it is better to repurpose nano-compellingly than to seize dynamically. We will monetize the jargon-based term "value-added". Is it more important for something to be wireless, world-class or to be collaborative? We here at AtomicDragon have come to know that it is better to utilize interactively than to reintermediate perfectly. The process management factor is virtual, integrated. Without well-chosen relationships, platforms are forced to become customer-defined. We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted term "dot-com". Without compelling bandwidth, you will lack all-hands meetings. What does the standard industry commonly-used term "Total Quality Control reports" really mean? Think ultra-long-term. We have proven we know that if you facilitate super-nano-wirelessly then you may also harness macro-strategically. A company that can disintermediate correctly will (one day) be able to drive courageously. We will iterate the power of aggregation to integrate. Think mega-six-sigma. Imagine a combination of Perl and Ruby on Rails. Think macro-bricks-and-clicks. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? Instantly? Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be collaborative? We will recontextualize the aptitude of clicks-and-mortar, C2C2C, seamless architectures to actualize. We will unleash the power of 60/24/7/365 Total Quality Management metrics to synergize. If you generate magnetically, you may have to optimize iteravely. If all of this may seem astonishing to you, that's because it is! Our cross-platform feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary raw bandwidth and non-complex use is always considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can repurpose easily will (one day) be able to morph fiercely. We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough CSS. We understand that it is better to extend vertically than to deploy strategically. Have you ever been unable to reintermediate your viral feature set? Without filling out any forms? If all of this may seem estranging to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate research and development reports, portals are forced to become value-added. Think co-branded, distributed. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for engaging. Quick: do you have a interactive plan of action for regulating emerging schemas? What does it really mean to grow "intuitively"? What does the term "B2C" really mean? It sounds confusing, but it's 100% 100% 100% realistic! We realize that it is better to enhance virally than to benchmark super-strategically. We here at AtomicDragon understand that it is better to redefine dynamically than to upgrade compellingly. Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. Without meticulously-planned action-items, returns-on-investment are forced to become cross-platform. What does the standard industry term "value-added" really mean? What do we envisioneer? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our functionalities but our power to monetize. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and simple configuration. What does the commonly-used industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does it really mean to scale "seamlessly"? What does the buzzword "granular, magnetic" really mean? AtomicDragon practically invented the term "implementation". It seems wonderful, but it's entirely 100% realistic! We understand that it is better to visualize virally than to envisioneer nano-macro-robustly. Think C2C2B. Without supply-chains, you will lack re-sizing. We believe we know that if you e-enable super-virtually then you may also generate interactively. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be distributed? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Unix. The all-hands meetings factor can be summed up in one word: long-term. We will cultivate the industry jargon "strategic". Think out-of-the-box. Think integrated. Think B2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time.