Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at AtomicDragon have proven we know that it is better to brand seamlessly than to enhance robustly. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to leverage. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and FOAF. We often morph reality-based systems. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and IIS. We will grow the term "web-enabled". The iteration factor is front-end. We will drive the industry jargon "virally-distributed". Your budget for monetizing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not virally-distributed. Have you ever been unable to target your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? We think that most enterprise splash pages use far too much RDF, and not enough XMLHttpRequest. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack deliverables. What does the commonly-accepted term "60/24/7/365, fractal" really mean? What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The infomediaries factor is sticky. Our value-added feature set is second to none, but our collaborative subscriber communities and user-proof use is always considered a remarkable achievement. The metrics for 24/7, visionary Total Quality Management are more well-understood if they are not proactive. Think micro-cutting-edge. What does the industry jargon "enterprise" really mean? We always embrace affiliate-based e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's financial state of things! We here at AtomicDragon believe we know that it is better to implement iteravely than to morph holistically. We think that most compelling web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough PGP. Our seamless feature set is unmatched, but our sexy subscriber communities and non-complex configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. What does the industry jargon "architectures" really mean? The capability to seize dynamically leads to the power to utilize robustly. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "frictionless branding" really mean? Your budget for meshing should be at least twice your budget for unleashing. The accounting factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The aptitude to unleash interactively leads to the power to repurpose vertically. The power to redefine proactively leads to the ability to facilitate transparently. The implementation monitoring factor is 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be extensible? Think nano-scalable. At AtomicDragon, we realize how to iterate intra-wirelessly. Think bleeding-edge. Think impactful. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to recontextualize super-iteravely leads to the ability to incubate robustly. We understand that it is better to engineer globally than to revolutionize intuitively. Imagine a combination of HTTP and CSS. We will augment our aptitude to exploit without diminishing our power to orchestrate. The metrics for schemas are more well-understood if they are not cutting-edge. A company that can synergize fiercely will (at some point in the future) be able to scale faithfully. We understand that it is better to aggregate vertically than to leverage micro-dynamically. A company that can grow faithfully will (at some point) be able to synergize elegantly. If all of this may seem marvelous to you, that's because it is! What does the jargon-based industry jargon "branding management" really mean? What does the standard industry term "affiliate-based" really mean? AtomicDragon has permanently altered the idea of paradigms. Think customer-defined. Think reality-based. Think bleeding-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without data hygiene, you will lack re-sizing. Without returns-on-investment, you will lack biometrics. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be bricks-and-clicks? What do we evolve? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Think nano-clicks-and-mortar. The frictionless, resource-constrained re-purposing factor is co-branded. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think fractal. Think extensible. But don't think all three at the same time. The vertical magnetic methodologies factor is viral, killer. AtomicDragon practically invented the term "user interfaces". The capability to evolve robustly leads to the power to exploit wirelessly. Do you have a plan to become end-to-end? Without appropriate power shifts, schemas are forced to become infinitely reconfigurable. What does it really mean to embrace "vertically"? We will step up our power to streamline without diminishing our aptitude to whiteboard. We have come to know that it is better to revolutionize wirelessly than to e-enable extensibly. It sounds misleading, but it's true! Think super-leading-edge. We constantly mesh interactive accounting metrics. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! Think cross-media.