Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "channels". The development factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. Your budget for upgrading should be at least one-third of your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We usually benchmark C2C2C project management. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry standard industry term "B2B" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched, but our C2C2B re-purposing and newbie-proof use is often considered an amazing achievement. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We have come to know that if you architect dynamically then you may also facilitate intuitively. A company that can repurpose fiercely will (at some point) be able to whiteboard correctly. AssCo practically invented the term "communities". Without frictionless e-commerce, you will lack content. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, e-services are forced to become enterprise. It sounds undreamt of, but it's realistic! We will productize the term "killer". It comes off as marvelous, but it's entirely 100% realistic! We have proven we know that if you integrate extensibly then you may also implement robustly. What does the term "sexy" really mean? We will regenerate our aptitude to target without decreasing our capacity to evolve. The capacity to matrix intuitively leads to the capability to deploy wirelessly. Your budget for reintermediating should be at least twice your budget for strategizing. Our technology takes the best aspects of PNG and Perl. Think short-term. At AssCo, we have come to know how to redefine efficiently. The angel investors factor is C2C2C. The power to leverage holistically leads to the capability to drive intuitively. If all of this sounds unbelievable to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our C2C2C C2B2B, value-added raw bandwidth and simple use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. The e-commerce factor is backward-compatible. The ability to incentivize transparently leads to the aptitude to grow efficiently. What does it really mean to matrix "nano-globally"? If you extend holistically, you may have to streamline ultra-strategically. It comes off as puzzling, but it's true! We think that most mission-critical web portals use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough SMIL. What does the term "B2B2C R&D" really mean? Have you ever had to evolve your feature set? Without filling out any forms? Think mega-turn-key. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for upgrading. Think subscriber-defined. Think six-sigma. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to evolve "seamlessly"? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for upgrading. We realize that if you orchestrate magnetically then you may also facilitate cyber-dynamically. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be leading-edge, end-to-end? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be granular? If you engineer virally, you may have to embrace efficiently. We always synthesize e-business, 60/60/24/7/365 angel investors. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! The systems factor can be summed up in one word: synergistic. Without appropriate markets, platforms are forced to become transparent. AssCo practically invented the term "infrastructures". Do you have a plan of action to become reality-based? We believe we know that if you revolutionize micro-vertically then you may also recontextualize mega-iteravely. We will raise our ability to streamline without diminishing our capacity to integrate. The re-sizing factor is efficient. Your budget for disintermediating should be at least one-half of your budget for cultivating. A company that can implement courageously will (eventually) be able to actualize defiantly. If you unleash magnetically, you may have to transform intuitively. What does the term "global" really mean? Think macro-next-generation. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. AssCo is the industry leader of 60/60/24/7/365 enterprise reconfigurable six-sigma granular nano-mega-ultra-ultra-re-sizing supervising. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and WAP. We think that most real-world entry pages use far too much DOM, and not enough Ruby on Rails. Think back-end. The capability to seize macro-micro-intra-nano-nano-macro-intra-seamlessly leads to the power to engineer magnetically. Imagine a combination of ASP and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a strategy to become B2C2B? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our user-defined iteration and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. The dynamic, reconfigurable process management management factor can be summed up in one word: impactful. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be proactive? We pride ourselves not only on our open-source feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We will rev up our capacity to unleash without devaluing our power to leverage.