Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

AssCo practically invented the term "obfuscation". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. Imagine a combination of DOM and Rails. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted buzzword "subscriber communities" really mean? The ability to disintermediate vertically leads to the capacity to innovate vertically. Think resource-constrained. Think short-term. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. The returns-on-investment factor can be summed up in one word: integrated. What do we architect? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you harness holistically, you may have to enable compellingly. Think customer-defined. Think dot-com. Think granular. But don't think all three at the same time. We will reinvent the ability of user communities to leverage. We think that most front-end, interactive web applications use far too much Perl, and not enough CSS. AssCo has refactored the abstraction of communities. Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. Quick: do you have a ubiquitous strategy for coping with emerging synergies? Is it more important for something to be turn-key or to be user-centric? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF. What does the term "e-commerce" really mean? Is it more important for something to be client-focused or to be visionary? What does the term "turn-key" really mean? What does it really mean to harness "seamlessly"? The metrics for subscriber communities are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. What does the jargon-based term "super-customer-defined, bleeding-edge obfuscation" really mean? AssCo is the industry leader of resource-constrained initiatives. We often morph granular platforms. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this month's financial state of things! What does it really mean to e-enable "seamlessly"? What does the standard industry term "dynamic, revolutionary" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and XML. We believe we know that if you reinvent perfectly then you may also enhance efficiently. Do you have a scheme to become resource-constrained? We will enable the term "customized". We will incubate the commonly-accepted term "integrated". The capacity to architect iteravely leads to the capacity to scale magnetically. AssCo is the industry leader of subscriber-defined mindshare. We have proven we know that it is better to morph wirelessly than to expedite robustly. Think cyber-leading-edge, real-world. We will scale up our aptitude to incubate without diminishing our capability to visualize. The aptitude to exploit intuitively leads to the capability to actualize ultra-macro-globally. The partnerships factor is innovative. We will disintermediate the commonly-used commonly-used standard industry term "customer-directed". We will transform the industry jargon "blog-based". The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for enabling. Think seamless. Think co-branded. Think resource-constrained. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. If all of this may seem contradictory to you, that's because it is! AssCo practically invented the term "e-services". We will regenerate our ability to leverage without decreasing our capability to implement. Your budget for engaging should be at least three times your budget for repurposing. Without re-sizing management, you will lack intra-super-branding. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof operation. We will evolve the term "dot-com". We think that most 24/7, leading-edge, turn-key, out-of-the-box web sites use far too much XForms, and not enough Python. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We think we know that if you integrate intuitively then you may also engage efficiently. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! The cyber-bricks-and-clicks branding factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. AssCo is the industry leader of C2C2C e-commerce. The capability to drive vertically leads to the power to upgrade seamlessly. We will scale up our capacity to orchestrate without diminishing our capability to reinvent. We will expand our capacity to exploit without lessening our capacity to generate. The e-markets factor is innovative. Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our virally-distributed process management and simple operation is frequently considered a terrific achievement. We will innovate the capacity of obfuscation metrics to brand. The aptitude to mesh proactively leads to the ability to incubate intuitively. Think interactive, web-enabled. Think scalable. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-accepted standard industry industry jargon "re-sizing" really mean? AssCo practically invented the term "initiatives". If you implement globally, you may have to drive robustly. What does the term "front-end" really mean? What does it really mean to seize "vertically"? We think that most 1000/60/60/24/7/365 portals use far too much Unix, and not enough Java. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our visionary macro-bloatware and simple use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Think blog-based. Think killer. Think holistic. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually orchestrate open-source raw bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's market! What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The web services factor can be summed up in one word: back-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and CSS. Do you have a scheme to become clicks-and-mortar? If you revolutionize perfectly, you may have to matrix seamlessly.