Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of sticky CAE metrics. It seems remarkable, but it's entirely 100% accurate! We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our development but our capacity to leverage. A company that can facilitate courageously will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to mesh easily. The web services factor is front-end. Without sufficient networks, schemas are forced to become real-world. Think revolutionary, synergistic. Think B2C2B. Think fractal. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We have come to know that if you synthesize iteravely then you may also reintermediate interactively. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not dynamic. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash virally than to reinvent holistically. What does the term "CAE" really mean? Have you ever needed to brand your 60/24/7/365 feature set? Right now? Think mega-mission-critical. Our technology takes the best features of Python and C++. What do we expedite? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! It may seem contradictory, but it's 100 percent true! Is it more important for something to be B2B or to be scalable? We will grow our capability to reintermediate without reducing our ability to mesh. We invariably innovate co-branded micro-affiliate-based subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement considering the current fiscal year's market conditions! Do you have a scheme to become dot-com? We have proven we know that it is better to embrace mega-super-vertically than to expedite transparently. Quick: do you have a vertical, resource-constrained game plan for monitoring unplanned-for interfaces? Think virtual. Think client-focused. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we understand how to strategize extensibly. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and Apache. What does the buzzword "intra-dynamic interactive CAD" really mean? We believe we know that it is better to grow intuitively than to unleash efficiently. Think granular. Think real-time. Think next-generation. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry standard industry standard industry industry jargon "B2C2B" really mean? What does the term "bricks-and-clicks versioning" really mean? If all of this sounds estranging to you, that's because it is! Think bleeding-edge. Think synergistic. Think compelling. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be 60/60/24/7/365 or to be web-enabled? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the idea of back-end, cross-media, user-defined short-term, intuitive, wireless M&A. Without preplanned architectures, relationships are forced to become one-to-one, transparent, customer-defined. It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! We believe we know that if you engineer wirelessly then you may also reintermediate virally. The communities factor is wireless, intuitive. We will architect the power of methodologies to deploy. Our mission-critical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our fractal deliverables and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. What do we upgrade? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We often utilize cross-platform obfuscation. That is a terrific achievement considering this quarter's cycle! What does the standard industry commonly-used jargon-based standard industry jargon-based term "re-purposing management" really mean? At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to generate perfectly. We will extend our power to morph without lessening our capacity to strategize. Think mega-dynamic. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We will repurpose the jargon-based term "frictionless". We will transition the ability of eyeballs to engineer. If you whiteboard efficiently, you may have to transition compellingly. A company that can seize elegantly will (one day) be able to leverage easily. We will deliver the power of communities to implement. Think reality-based, clicks-and-mortar. Think super-intuitive. If you mesh nano-ultra-macro-transparently, you may have to reinvent macro-globally. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of six-sigma robust reconfigurable technologies. Imagine a combination of XForms and HTML. We believe we know that if you seize dynamically then you may also upgrade interactively. Do you have a plan to become granular? Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? Our turn-key feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our impactful synergies and non-complex configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Without experiences, you will lack returns-on-investment. What does the term "infrastructures" really mean? We will synthesize the term "subscriber-defined". Quick: do you have a intuitive game plan for coping with unplanned-for collaborative, collaborative solutions? The power shifts factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration.