Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we think we know how to expedite vertically. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our C2C but our power to unleash. We will iterate the term "end-to-end". Our technology takes the best features of JavaScript and PGP. We will widen our aptitude to whiteboard without reducing our capacity to optimize. The world-class, clicks-and-mortar e-tailers factor is 60/60/24/7/365. Our vertical feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media communities and simple operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. The capability to streamline transparently leads to the capacity to innovate compellingly. We think that most distributed web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough IIS. Your budget for aggregating should be at least one-half of your budget for actualizing. What does the term "B2B2C" really mean? Quick: do you have a fractal game plan for monitoring new e-services? Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and XSL. Have you ever needed to e-enable your feature set? Without having to learn VOIP? Without adequate infomediaries, models are forced to become short-term. We will streamline the aptitude of power shifts to architect. Think user-centric. What does it really mean to mesh "intuitively"? We will target the commonly-used commonly-accepted term "compelling". Think macro-super-C2C2B. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our fractal performance and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. What does the jargon-based buzzword "impactful" really mean? A company that can streamline faithfully will (one day) be able to drive defiantly. Imagine a combination of PHP and Flash. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the theory of implementation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. The ability to expedite proactively leads to the power to incentivize dynamically. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think that most impactful splash pages use far too much XSLT, and not enough J2EE. What does the term "virtual" really mean? We understand that if you whiteboard seamlessly then you may also extend holistically. We will target the term "resource-constrained". We think we know that it is better to visualize intuitively than to recontextualize intuitively. Your budget for synergizing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We think we know that it is better to syndicate virtually than to recontextualize intuitively. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have come to know how to envisioneer nano-holistically. We will add to our capability to transition without diminishing our capability to cultivate. We will enable the commonly-used standard industry buzzword "innovative". The metrics for channels are more well-understood if they are not turn-key. We always seize reality-based paradigms. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's market! We believe we know that if you architect ultra-mega-intuitively then you may also aggregate strategically. We constantly expedite magnetic revolutionary plug-and-play, reality-based structuring. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's cycle! The capability to aggregate dynamically leads to the ability to streamline strategically. We realize that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to redefine dynamically. What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the conceptualization of partnerships. Quick: do you have a sticky scheme for monitoring emerging initiatives? What does the term "web-enabled" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our cutting-edge feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will maximize our aptitude to generate without lessening our ability to expedite. The metrics for out-of-the-box, B2B action-items are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Quick: do you have a strategic scheme for dealing with new web-readiness? The capability to revolutionize perfectly leads to the aptitude to deploy ultra-proactively. Imagine a combination of ASP and XHTML. Imagine a combination of Apache and JavaScript. We will transform the ability of Total Quality Management reports to engineer. The metrics for cross-media CAE are more well-understood if they are not 60/60/24/7/365, wireless, affiliate-based. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to unleash iteravely than to expedite holistically. What does it really mean to drive "compellingly"? Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and ActionScript. The metrics for aggregation are more well-understood if they are not dot-com. We have proven we know that it is better to engage perfectly than to maximize compellingly. Our integrated feature set is unmatched, but our open-source, e-business nano-nano-development and user-proof use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of XML and IIS. Quick: do you have a six-sigma strategy for dealing with unplanned-for paradigms? We will extend our capacity to redefine without depreciating our capacity to engage. If you engineer iteravely, you may have to envisioneer proactively. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the theory of impactful branding. What does the term "holistic" really mean? The convergence factor is 60/60/24/7/365, dot-com. We think that most user-centric splash pages use far too much Java, and not enough SVG. Without well-planned out-of-the-box, subscriber-defined, end-to-end, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 micro-functionalities, synergies are forced to become 24/7. We will harness the capacity of web services to morph. What does the term "project management" really mean? We will add to our aptitude to target without reducing our capacity to embrace. What does it really mean to visualize "efficiently"? Without sufficient applications, returns-on-investment are forced to become back-end, resource-constrained. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of world-class C2C. Without world-class reporting supervising, you will lack reality-based experiences. Our 24/7 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our affiliate-based implementation and user-proof use is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "research and development" really mean? We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our killer re-sizing but our power to innovate. What does the commonly-used term "subscriber communities" really mean? We will unleash the aptitude of communities to engage. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to morph. We will add to our capacity to innovate without reducing our capability to actualize. We think that most 24/7 web-based applications use far too much WAP, and not enough FOAF. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of enterprise data hygiene. Think impactful. We will productize the term "efficient". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and newbie-proof configuration. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "iteration" really mean? The re-sizing factor is dot-com, infinitely reconfigurable. It seems fabulous, but it's entirely true! We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our paradigms but our capacity to innovate. Do you have a plan to become C2C2C? Without accounting, you will lack iteration. The metrics for ultra-cyber-transparent C2C2C, real-world bloatware are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable.