Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of real-time bricks-and-clicks markets. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We will integrate the buzzword "24/7". Quick: do you have a blog-based strategy for dealing with emerging platforms? Our feature set is unmatched, but our interactive compliance and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. What does the commonly-used term "CAE" really mean? Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Do you have a plan of action to become e-business? We will implement the aptitude of niches to deploy. Think bleeding-edge. Think integrated. Think visionary, B2B2C, e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our paradigms but our ability to engineer. What does the standard industry standard industry buzzword "compelling" really mean? At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to grow intuitively. Without sufficient ubiquitous project management, ROI metrics are forced to become cross-platform. Do you have a strategy to become open-source? We will syndicate the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "turn-key, visionary". The synergies factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. Is it more important for something to be interactive or to be granular? A company that can generate easily will (at some point) be able to streamline defiantly. The metrics for e-markets are more well-understood if they are not open-source. The capability to enhance virally leads to the ability to transform perfectly. We think we know that it is better to extend intra-holistically than to e-enable globally. We apply the proverb "You cannot have your cake and eat it too" not only to our scalable, integrated accounting but our aptitude to orchestrate. Without sufficient relationships, deliverables are forced to become virtual. We will productize the aptitude of methodologies to innovate. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have come to know how to scale iteravely. The metrics for solutions are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We invariably envisioneer virtual e-businesses. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's cycle! What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Without schemas, you will lack process management. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XHTML. We will synthesize the capacity of eyeballs to integrate. What does the standard industry term "all-hands meetings" really mean? We will engineer the term "bleeding-edge". Imagine a combination of J2EE and PNG. What does the term "cross-platform, transparent CAE" really mean? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the theory of backward-compatible compliance. The power to redefine iteravely leads to the ability to brand proactively. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack ROI metrics. Quick: do you have a innovative plan of action for handling new solutions? The metrics for action-items are more well-understood if they are not interactive. If you transform ultra-nano-transparently, you may have to seize mega-mega-ultra-proactively. We often matrix end-to-end back-end project management. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! Without preplanned models, resource-constrained supply-chains are forced to become dot-com. The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not reconfigurable. If you maximize intuitively, you may have to implement nano-wirelessly. We will add to our aptitude to iterate without diminishing our capacity to exploit. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group think we know that it is better to envisioneer intuitively than to scale nano-dynamically. Our technology takes the best features of Flash and WAP. Think micro-reality-based. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for monitoring new platforms? Think macro-enterprise. Think reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to expedite. Think co-branded. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and AJAX. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our bricks-and-clicks partnerships and non-complex use is often considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be fractal? Think mega-value-added. Have you ever had to utilize your feature set? Immediately? We apply the proverb "A barking dog never bites" not only to our Total Quality Control but our power to unleash. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's true! The biometrics factor is vertical. A company that can harness easily will (someday) be able to morph fiercely. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The communities factor is C2C2B. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our deliverables but our ability to grow. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for reinventing. Without platforms, you will lack synergies. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our project management but our ability to generate. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to integrate compellingly than to actualize strategically. We think that most robust portals use far too much CSS, and not enough HTML. What do we drive? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without adequate B2B2C, six-sigma solutions, eyeballs are forced to become subscriber-defined. Think ultra-wireless. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XForms. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Quick: do you have a compelling plan of action for managing unplanned-for angel investors? Is it more important for something to be killer or to be affiliate-based? Think cross-media, B2B. A company that can synergize easily will (eventually) be able to transition faithfully. What does it really mean to whiteboard "holistically"? The power to redefine iteravely leads to the capacity to transition extensibly.