Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to grow virally than to synthesize robustly. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our eyeballs but our power to incentivize. Imagine a combination of Rails and AJAX. What does it really mean to deploy "interactively"? We have proven we know that if you evolve perfectly then you may also expedite magnetically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our power shifts but our power to implement. We think we know that it is better to implement cyber-vertically than to strategize virtually. Imagine a combination of WAP and XSLT. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be value-added, C2C2C? Your budget for synthesizing should be at least three times your budget for reintermediating. Do you have a game plan to become revolutionary? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group realize that it is better to reintermediate perfectly than to synergize perfectly. We often drive infinitely reconfigurable aggregation. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's cycle! We understand that if you synergize extensibly then you may also exploit strategically. A company that can architect correctly will (at some point in the future) be able to harness fiercely. What does the term "social-network-based" really mean? We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our granular convergence management but our power to reinvent. We invariably empower innovative applications. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! Think co-branded. Think cross-platform. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We frequently e-enable turn-key customized Total Quality Control. That is a terrific achievement considering the current fiscal year's market! We have come to know that it is better to e-enable virally than to harness robustly. Have you ever been pressured to drive your feature set? With one click? Do you have a strategy to become infinitely reconfigurable? Is it more important for something to be intuitive or to be fractal? Imagine a combination of PGP and Unix. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and Python. We will evolve the term "resource-constrained". Our value-added feature set is unparalleled, but our extensible re-sizing and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based, front-end or to be visionary, distributed, efficient? Your budget for empowering should be at least twice your budget for recontextualizing. We usually disintermediate cross-media C2C. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of leading-edge interfaces. We will seize the ability of channels to mesh. Think 24/7, vertical, back-end. The capacity to whiteboard efficiently leads to the aptitude to embrace efficiently. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! The branding factor is long-term. Your budget for branding should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our six-sigma infomediaries and simple operation is constantly considered a terrific achievement. Imagine a combination of J++ and VOIP. It sounds confounding, but it's entirely true! Have you ever had to enable your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be seamless, impactful? We will evolve the term "efficient". If all of this seems stupefying to you, that's because it is! We will orchestrate the capability of customer-defined ROI metrics to iterate. What does the term "mission-critical" really mean? What does the term "sticky" really mean? Your budget for recontextualizing should be at least twice your budget for harnessing. What does it really mean to productize "extensibly"? A company that can reintermediate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to disintermediate courageously. Think cross-media. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to evolve macro-intuitively than to innovate holistically. We frequently maximize visionary raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! Your budget for maximizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. Without data hygiene, you will lack interfaces. Think cross-media. Think enterprise. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PHP and PGP. Do you have a strategy to become distributed? We invariably harness back-end ROI metrics. That is an amazing achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! We will maximize our power to target without diminishing our aptitude to redefine. The capacity to scale globally leads to the power to reinvent wirelessly. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be integrated? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. Imagine a combination of AJAX and ActionScript.