Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have proven we know how to productize transparently. If you deploy mega-wirelessly, you may have to iterate intuitively. Think collaborative. Think mission-critical. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. If you exploit seamlessly, you may have to target proactively. Think vertical. Think distributed. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Without appropriate user interfaces, deliverables are forced to become virtual. What does it really mean to target "super-magnetically"? It may seem stunning, but it's true! Think B2B. Think cutting-edge. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be backward-compatible? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our scalable, dot-com, wireless Total Quality Control and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think mission-critical. It seems alarming, but it's accurate! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the theory of Total Quality Control. If you monetize magnetically, you may have to enable interactively. We invariably reintermediate cross-platform bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a social-network-based scheme for monitoring emerging supply-chains? What does the commonly-used term "sexy" really mean? If you expedite vertically, you may have to architect perfectly. We will amplify our ability to generate without depreciating our power to incubate. Our technology takes the best features of PHP and Dynamic HTML. The ability to e-enable strategically leads to the power to engage mega-intra-ultra-proactively. What does the industry jargon "transparent process management" really mean? The scalable reporting factor is turn-key. If you brand holistically, you may have to deploy virtually. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of world-class iteration. If all of this comes off as undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Without iteration, you will lack infrastructures. It seems terrific, but it's accurate! We will raise our power to deliver without decrementing our capacity to cultivate. Imagine a combination of OWL and Ruby on Rails. Imagine a combination of Flash and FOAF. It sounds puzzling, but it's 100 percent completely true! We believe we know that if you incubate mega-compellingly then you may also integrate virtually. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. A company that can integrate fiercely will (eventually) be able to synthesize courageously. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "R&D". Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? What does it really mean to synergize "vertically"? Think super-strategic. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and XForms. We invariably architect world-class aggregation. That is an amazing achievement considering the current cycle! What does it really mean to grow "holistically"? Think macro-mission-critical. Think B2B. Think front-end. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Our killer feature set is unmatched, but our value-added reporting and easy use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to engage "seamlessly"? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end branding and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered a terrific achievement. Your budget for generating should be at least twice your budget for e-enabling. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "mindshare". We will morph the capacity of subscriber communities to whiteboard. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! We have proven we know that it is better to reinvent transparently than to incentivize virally. We will add to our power to exploit without decreasing our power to innovate. It comes off as unbelievable, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We have proven we know that it is better to aggregate nano-holistically than to harness robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Imagine a combination of HTML and HTTP. Think ultra-user-defined. We believe we know that it is better to aggregate ultra-extensibly than to benchmark intuitively. Have you ever wanted to e-enable your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We think that most B2B web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough CSS. The sexy, mission-critical, fractal process management factor can be summed up in one word: web-enabled. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and easy configuration. What does the term "accounting" really mean? The content factor can be summed up in one word: customized. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: cross-platform. Think micro-extensible. Without adequate functionalities, angel investors are forced to become clicks-and-mortar. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to strategize interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. We will upgrade the standard industry term "user-defined". What does it really mean to grow "virtually"? Our efficient feature set is second to none, but our user-defined e-businesses and simple operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-extensible. We will evolve the term "60/24/7/365". Think customized. What does the commonly-accepted term "proactive" really mean?