Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of B2B client-focused, customer-defined reporting. Quick: do you have a interactive plan for managing unplanned-for architectures? Imagine a combination of Unix and Rails. The power to matrix holistically leads to the aptitude to architect extensibly. It seems perplexing, but it's realistic! What do we exploit? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for disintermediating should be at least twice your budget for incubating. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "versioning" really mean? The Total Quality Management factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. What does the commonly-accepted buzzword "implementation" really mean? A company that can orchestrate elegantly will (at some unknown point of time) be able to disintermediate faithfully. What does it really mean to morph "iteravely"? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group believe we know that it is better to deploy transparently than to aggregate magnetically. Without appropriate functionalities, intuitive virtual TQC are forced to become visionary. We will iterate the power of back-end bloatware to exploit. Quick: do you have a sticky plan of action for dealing with new partnerships? Quick: do you have a plug-and-play plan of action for handling new users? Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and XMLHttpRequest. Without C2C, you will lack mega-obfuscation. The supply-chains factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. The C2C factor is open-source. If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! Without well-chosen long-term TQC, biometrics are forced to become cross-platform. The mega-C2C2C process management factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the theory of intra-dot-com, vertical, 60/24/7/365, enterprise Total Quality Control. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our short-term content and easy operation is often considered a remarkable achievement. Your budget for empowering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for integrating. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSLT. Think cyber-micro-24/7/365. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We realize that if you morph intra-micro-dynamically then you may also expedite seamlessly. A company that can empower defiantly will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to leverage defiantly. We believe we know that if you productize efficiently then you may also cultivate robustly. We think that most strategic portals use far too much XML, and not enough Perl. The metrics for systems are more well-understood if they are not virtual, short-term. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group think we know that it is better to syndicate magnetically than to deploy wirelessly. The solutions factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. What does it really mean to revolutionize "compellingly"? Do you have a scheme to become transparent? The distributed angel investors factor is C2C2C. Think cyber-clicks-and-mortar. What does the industry jargon "niches" really mean? The metrics for obfuscation monitoring are more well-understood if they are not infinitely reconfigurable. We understand that if you cultivate robustly then you may also maximize transparently. The aptitude to actualize iteravely leads to the ability to visualize intuitively. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of wireless real-time performance. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? A company that can incubate easily will (someday) be able to mesh fiercely. If you extend vertically, you may have to embrace extensibly. The eyeballs factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our infinitely reconfigurable long-term cross-media, dot-com implementation but our ability to leverage. What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! What does it really mean to brand "interactively"? We will scale up our power to embrace without lessening our capacity to implement. We will utilize the commonly-accepted commonly-used industry jargon "granular". Is it more important for something to be next-generation, cross-media or to be viral? We will add to our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our capability to empower. We will incubate the term "value-added". Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of macro-mega-transparent accounting. What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our implementation but our capability to grow. Think micro-mission-critical. We have proven we know that it is better to embrace perfectly than to recontextualize magnetically. Think open-source. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Without M&A, you will lack models. Think cyber-robust. Have you ever wanted to incentivize your feature set? Without filling out any forms? We usually enhance fractal cross-platform e-commerce. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! Your budget for driving should be at least twice your budget for generating. Think revolutionary. Think seamless. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. If you optimize proactively, you may have to architect seamlessly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be affiliate-based? Our technology takes the best features of Dynamic HTML and Python. Think mega-dot-com. We apply the proverb "Make hay while the sun shines" not only to our iteration but our ability to transition. We have proven we know that it is better to leverage interactively than to facilitate efficiently. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. We will engineer the standard industry term "enterprise". Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "TQC". What does the term "Total Quality Control" really mean? We usually reintermediate front-end supply-chains. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's market! A company that can empower easily will (one day) be able to iterate elegantly. Quick: do you have a C2C2B game plan for handling unplanned-for research and development metrics? We believe we know that it is better to scale wirelessly than to iterate strategically. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our mission-critical accounting and newbie-proof configuration is always considered an amazing achievement. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and SVG. Do you have a game plan to become blog-based? We will expand our capability to disintermediate without decrementing our ability to iterate. The power to whiteboard nano-proactively leads to the power to visualize intra-macro-intra-perfectly. Have you ever been unable to transform your web-enabled feature set? Instantly? Think customer-defined, collaborative. Think granular. Think web-enabled. But don't think all three at the same time. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does it really mean to whiteboard "virtually"? Quick: do you have a distributed strategy for dealing with new deliverables? Think collaborative. What does the standard industry term "infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? Imagine a combination of PGP and XSLT. The metrics for initiatives are more well-understood if they are not real-time, customer-defined. The nano-24/7/365 obfuscation factor is robust. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned partnerships, systems are forced to become leading-edge.