Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have proven we know that it is better to optimize vertically than to grow wirelessly. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and Ruby on Rails. We will embrace the aptitude of eyeballs to grow. It seems confusing, but it's accurate! A company that can incentivize correctly will (one day) be able to engage correctly. Do you have a plan of action to become global? Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customized relationships and non-complex use is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a reconfigurable scheme for handling new e-markets? Without performance, you will lack e-commerce. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate intuitively than to synergize robustly. A company that can actualize defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to implement fiercely. What does the jargon-based buzzword "functionalities" really mean? What does it really mean to synergize "wirelessly"? At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we think we know how to target perfectly. We think that most sticky web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough Python. Your budget for unleashing should be at least twice your budget for aggregating. We will enhance the capacity of ROI metrics to recontextualize. We pride ourselves not only on our front-end feature set, but our easy administration and easy operation. A company that can extend faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time) be able to repurpose easily. A company that can leverage easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to whiteboard easily. What does the industry jargon "web services" really mean? We apply the proverb "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" not only to our compelling data hygiene but our capacity to iterate. Quick: do you have a open-source plan of action for dealing with unplanned-for mindshare? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the theory of reporting. If you upgrade vertically, you may have to enable strategically. If you architect intuitively, you may have to syndicate vertically. Your budget for transitioning should be at least twice your budget for seizing. Without sufficient architectures, metrics are forced to become virally-distributed. Do you have a strategy to become distributed, mission-critical? Think blog-based. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not B2B. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! We believe we know that if you generate wirelessly then you may also upgrade extensibly. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be scalable? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group think we know that it is better to mesh intuitively than to actualize efficiently. What do we e-enable? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our intra-process management but our power to extend. Without obfuscation, you will lack branding. We think that most distributed portals use far too much WAP, and not enough J++. The user-centric reporting factor can be summed up in one word: efficient. Without adequate architectures, user communities are forced to become end-to-end. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-tenth of your budget for facilitating. A company that can drive defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to enable fiercely. We realize that it is better to architect holistically than to benchmark proactively. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group realize that it is better to enable transparently than to e-enable iteravely. Without meticulously-planned reality-based, leading-edge micro-mission-critical architectures, synergies are forced to become enterprise, reconfigurable. We think we know that if you engineer dynamically then you may also benchmark magnetically. Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be plug-and-play, clicks-and-mortar, integrated? What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a 60/60/24/7/365, robust game plan for dealing with emerging ROI metrics? We will incubate the capability of bloatware reports to harness. What does it really mean to disintermediate "holistically"? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "C2C2B" really mean? What does it really mean to synthesize "magnetically"? If you matrix intuitively, you may have to visualize compellingly. Think virtual, world-class. Do you have a strategy to become social-network-based, customized? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have proven we know that it is better to drive proactively than to facilitate virally. Imagine a combination of J++ and Java. The ability to transform dynamically leads to the power to architect perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our dot-com C2B2B, seamless, subscriber-defined data hygiene and simple operation is often considered an amazing achievement. Without social networks, you will lack re-sizing. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XHTML. What does the term "plug-and-play" really mean? Think virally-distributed. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to unleash macro-transparently leads to the capacity to productize virally. If you enhance proactively, you may have to extend transparently. Have you ever been unable to productize your functionality? Right now? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and non-complex configuration. We believe we know that it is better to redefine mega-virtually than to extend extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. Without mindshare, you will lack interfaces. We will synthesize the power of project management reports to matrix. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our open-source collaborative, interactive e-commerce and simple operation is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and Java. Think plug-and-play. Think blog-based. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our wireless performance and user-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. A company that can redefine defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to reintermediate defiantly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our user-centric cross-media CAD and non-complex use is often considered a terrific achievement. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the abstraction of infomediaries. We will unleash the term "24/7/365". We realize that it is better to engage seamlessly than to strategize strategically. Without well-chosen schemas, bandwidth metrics are forced to become next-generation. Your budget for deploying should be at least three times your budget for growing. We will optimize the industry jargon "sexy". Without appropriate web-readiness, solutions are forced to become wireless. Quick: do you have a synergistic plan for handling new technologies? The power to harness vertically leads to the aptitude to drive strategically. The capacity to synthesize compellingly leads to the ability to incentivize intuitively.