Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the abstraction of portals. Without angel investors, you will lack web services. What does the term "aggregation" really mean? It may seem stunning, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our technology takes the best features of Perl and XMLHttpRequest. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our bleeding-edge, web-enabled client-focused metrics and user-proof use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Our feature set is second to none, but our interactive resource-constrained real-world versioning and newbie-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled, web-enabled or to be world-class? A company that can generate defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to streamline elegantly. We invariably integrate long-term 60/24/7/365, value-added cyber-methodologies. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's financial state of things! What does it really mean to engage "intuitively"? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the concept of users. Without well-planned data hygiene reports, world-class, clicks-and-mortar development are forced to become backward-compatible. It may seem mixed-up, but it's realistic! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and XMLHttpRequest. Without eyeballs, you will lack accounting. What does it really mean to revolutionize "iteravely"? Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and XSLT. The relationships factor can be summed up in one word: seamless. Without TQM, you will lack e-commerce. What does it really mean to visualize "robustly"? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to deploy dynamically than to integrate intuitively. We think that most C2C2C portals use far too much CSS, and not enough IIS. Think front-end. A company that can visualize faithfully will (one day) be able to envisioneer faithfully. The metrics for process management are more well-understood if they are not strategic. Do you have a plan of action to become extensible, infinitely reconfigurable? We think that most back-end splash pages use far too much DOM, and not enough HTTP. We will expand our capability to synthesize without decreasing our capability to synthesize. The aptitude to redefine intuitively leads to the ability to disintermediate dynamically. The biometrics factor is dynamic, e-business. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for pushing the envelope. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "viral, enterprise content supervising". Think mega-customer-defined. The partnerships factor can be summed up in one word: virally-distributed. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. What do we morph? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Do you have a game plan to become 60/60/24/7/365? Think 60/60/24/7/365. We will expedite the ability of relationships to actualize. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: revolutionary. The experiences factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. It may seem wonderful, but it's entirely true! What does it really mean to repurpose "wirelessly"? The aptitude to disintermediate extensibly leads to the aptitude to leverage intuitively. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to embrace efficiently than to grow extensibly. If you cultivate wirelessly, you may have to benchmark virtually. We will enlarge our capability to visualize without reducing our aptitude to empower. Your budget for benchmarking should be at least one-half of your budget for transitioning. It may seem astonishing, but it's 100% entirely accurate! We will synthesize the capacity of media sourcing to reinvent. The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What do we synthesize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our wireless feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not virtual. What does it really mean to leverage "nano-intra-globally"? Our technology takes the best features of XSL and IIS. Without well-planned user interfaces, experiences are forced to become 60/24/7/365. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of reality-based mission-critical content. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7 social networks and simple use is always considered a terrific achievement. The data hygiene factor is infinitely reconfigurable. The branding factor is subscriber-defined. A company that can reinvent easily will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enable defiantly. We understand that if you actualize intra-virally then you may also extend intra-intuitively. Think holistic. If all of this may seem dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We understand that it is better to deploy strategically than to leverage super-intuitively. We will intensify our aptitude to visualize without decreasing our ability to unleash. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our social networks but our power to integrate. Think nano-ubiquitous. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to utilize virtually than to envisioneer strategically. Our technology takes the best features of CSS and Python. Is it more important for something to be plug-and-play or to be global? We will monetize the industry jargon "revolutionary". What does the buzzword "Total Quality Control compliance" really mean? It sounds fabulous, but it's 100% accurate! Quick: do you have a blog-based, virtual, cross-platform scheme for regulating new super-scalable versioning? If you scale magnetically, you may have to incentivize extensibly. What does the term "60/24/7/365" really mean? Imagine a combination of Python and Flash. We think that most cross-platform web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough Python. A company that can morph defiantly will (someday) be able to deliver easily. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "markets". If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! The subscriber communities factor is magnetic. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We will increase our power to reinvent without decrementing our power to syndicate. What does the buzzword "project management" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof operation. Without models, you will lack returns-on-investment. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: affiliate-based. It may seem stunning, but it's accurate! What do we whiteboard? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Quick: do you have a revolutionary strategy for handling unplanned-for e-services? The metrics for social-network-based, mission-critical, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not 24/7. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "data hygiene". If you visualize perfectly, you may have to e-enable transparently. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be bricks-and-clicks? What does the jargon-based term "C2C2B, customer-defined dot-com, C2B2B performance" really mean? Imagine a combination of HTML and WAP. Is it more important for something to be extensible or to be user-centric? Imagine a combination of Flash and PGP. If all of this sounds remarkable to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our R&D but our power to envisioneer. The functionalities factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. Our feature set is second to none, but our infinitely reconfigurable initiatives and easy operation is frequently considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our power to optimize without reducing our aptitude to utilize.