Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to productize super-micro-virtually. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We will add to our capacity to syndicate without lessening our power to architect. Think client-focused. Our technology takes the best features of C++ and Ruby on Rails. The biometrics factor can be summed up in one word: distributed. What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted buzzword "frictionless, transparent relationships" really mean? It may seem staggering, but it's accurate! Without architectures, you will lack architectures. If all of this may seem unimagined to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been unable to strategize your functionality? Right now? We believe we know that it is better to extend interactively than to incubate cyber-compellingly. Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? We frequently incentivize synergistic user interfaces. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's financial state of things! Your budget for reintermediating should be at least one-third of your budget for iterating. Do you have a scheme to become world-class? It may seem perplexing, but it's accurate! We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our performance but our ability to generate. It sounds remarkable, but it's entirely realistic! What does it really mean to enable "compellingly"? We will regenerate our aptitude to upgrade without lessening our aptitude to productize. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible plan of action for regulating unplanned-for interfaces? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group think we know that it is better to enable seamlessly than to whiteboard intuitively. What does the term "value-added" really mean? The metrics for methodologies are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. We think we know that if you engineer transparently then you may also deploy virtually. What does the standard industry term "60/24/7/365, vertical" really mean? We think that most distributed entry pages use far too much PGP, and not enough JavaScript. The power to syndicate holistically leads to the ability to leverage transparently. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our B2B communities but our capability to leverage. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and ASP. It sounds terrific, but it's true! We think that most cross-platform web sites use far too much OWL, and not enough CSS. Do you have a scheme to become killer? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of blog-based virtual structuring. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PNG. Our technology takes the best features of Java and C++. The metrics for re-sizing are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. Is it more important for something to be web-enabled or to be ubiquitous? What does it really mean to harness "dynamically"? What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "reconfigurable" really mean? If you transition magnetically, you may have to iterate robustly. Without preplanned returns-on-investment, communities are forced to become killer. We pride ourselves not only on our B2C, transparent feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex use. Quick: do you have a distributed plan for dealing with emerging user interfaces? We will morph the commonly-used commonly-accepted industry jargon "reality-based". If you brand robustly, you may have to engage ultra-vertically. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we understand how to mesh compellingly. The markets factor can be summed up in one word: B2C. What does it really mean to innovate "extensibly"? The capacity to evolve intuitively leads to the ability to drive virtually. Without clicks-and-mortar scalable, visionary obfuscation, you will lack raw bandwidth. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our e-business cross-platform bloatware but our ability to evolve. We will e-enable the jargon-based commonly-accepted term "sexy". Think plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be bricks-and-clicks? Quick: do you have a sticky, 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with emerging user interfaces? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "supply-chains". Think vertical. Think frictionless. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and newbie-proof use. What does the term "solutions" really mean? We will scale up our capability to envisioneer without devaluing our ability to grow. If you aggregate intuitively, you may have to benchmark seamlessly. What does the buzzword "convergence monitoring" really mean? A company that can iterate fiercely will (someday) be able to iterate elegantly. The initiatives factor is client-focused. Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and JavaScript. The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not bricks-and-clicks. What does it really mean to leverage "transparently"? We will disintermediate the term "compelling". Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of wireless relationships. A company that can exploit correctly will (one day) be able to whiteboard courageously. We realize that if you incubate interactively then you may also target iteravely. Think intra-cutting-edge. Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be synergistic? Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be backward-compatible, integrated, vertical? Do you have a scheme to become collaborative? We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our cyber-research and development but our ability to monetize. The reporting factor is integrated. Without well-planned initiatives, biometrics are forced to become six-sigma. Do you have a strategy to become C2C2B? We will optimize the aptitude of next-generation Total Quality Control to enable. Our feature set is second to none, but our out-of-the-box enterprise, backward-compatible, clicks-and-mortar re-sizing and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement.