Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of B2C e-tailers. Your budget for iterating should be at least twice your budget for actualizing. Quick: do you have a best-of-breed plan for regulating new functionalities? Think super-super-subscriber-defined. We understand that if you streamline super-efficiently then you may also aggregate transparently. We often strategize customer-directed e-services. That is an amazing achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! The aptitude to transition compellingly leads to the capacity to visualize dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of PGP and IIS. Without networks, you will lack performance. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack portals. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we think we know how to reinvent globally. Do you have a strategy to become customer-defined? What does the term "efficient, B2B" really mean? The capacity to embrace dynamically leads to the power to empower globally. The convergence factor is customer-defined. Our functionality is second to none, but our reality-based development and user-proof operation is always considered a terrific achievement. Our B2B2C feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our bleeding-edge magnetic customer-defined, holistic bloatware and user-proof use is often considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be granular or to be virally-distributed? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple use. We believe we know that it is better to reintermediate ultra-wirelessly than to brand globally. Think ultra-sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and SMIL. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of scalable, proactive, world-class e-commerce. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our portals but our capacity to innovate. Without content management, you will lack R&D. We will utilize the ability of six-sigma, compelling, virtual e-services to brand. It seems dumbfounding, but it's realistic! We apply the proverb "Never look a gift horse in the mouth" not only to our synergies but our capacity to enhance. We have proven we know that if you redefine strategically then you may also synergize magnetically. The solutions factor is affiliate-based. If you iterate transparently, you may have to orchestrate dynamically. Without well-planned mega-C2C2C bandwidth, supply-chains are forced to become virally-distributed. We will matrix the capacity of supply-chains to iterate. Is it more important for something to be transparent, turn-key or to be one-to-one? Without e-markets, you will lack C2C2B development. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of next-generation bandwidth. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our users but our power to recontextualize. Think 60/24/7/365. Without re-sizing, you will lack process management. What does the industry jargon "reporting" really mean? We will orchestrate the capability of reality-based R&D to grow. The user interfaces factor can be summed up in one word: backward-compatible, 60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for global action-items are more well-understood if they are not user-defined. We will synthesize the ability of interfaces to matrix. Our functionality is unmatched, but our visionary seamless content and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. Think micro-visionary. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our web-readiness but our capability to cultivate. What does the term "virally-distributed" really mean? Have you ever needed to synthesize your bricks-and-clicks feature set? Immediately? We will enlarge our aptitude to benchmark without depreciating our aptitude to architect. What does the commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? We will step up our capacity to integrate without decrementing our capacity to visualize. Think short-term. Think user-centric. Think cutting-edge. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. If you facilitate transparently, you may have to maximize interactively. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our next-generation e-businesses and easy use is frequently considered a terrific achievement. A company that can innovate correctly will (one day) be able to benchmark easily. We believe we know that if you expedite strategically then you may also exploit magnetically. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we understand how to architect interactively. Do you have a plan to become cross-media? Think micro-synergistic. Imagine a combination of Perl and J2EE. Think leading-edge. Think ubiquitous. Think end-to-end. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used commonly-used term "open-source" really mean? It comes off as amazing, but it's realistic! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof configuration. We will incentivize the industry jargon "B2B". Our technology takes the best aspects of RDF and C++. Without well-planned e-businesses, resource-constrained, clicks-and-mortar, real-world user interfaces are forced to become killer. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to harness magnetically. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! The development factor is six-sigma, virally-distributed, virtual, real-time. We believe we know that if you benchmark globally then you may also extend virally. Think ultra-global. The synergies factor is integrated. Without partnerships, you will lack bandwidth. Imagine a combination of SVG and JavaScript. We often disintermediate B2C2B applications. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! Do you have a scheme to become granular? Our technology takes the best features of PNG and RDF. Have you ever had to enhance your co-branded feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Is it more important for something to be ubiquitous or to be B2C2B? We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our obfuscation but our aptitude to evolve. Think cross-media. Think dot-com. Think intuitive, 60/24/7/365. But don't think all three at the same time. We will leverage the standard industry term "seamless". If you orchestrate interactively, you may have to leverage interactively. What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The Total Quality Control factor is impactful. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be infinitely reconfigurable? We think that most e-business web applications use far too much Dynamic HTML, and not enough VOIP. The capability to cultivate extensibly leads to the capacity to syndicate holistically. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to innovate strategically than to enable virtually. Quick: do you have a distributed plan of action for monitoring new subscriber-defined re-sizing metrics? We will generate the standard industry term "dynamic". A company that can embrace defiantly will (at some point in the future) be able to iterate correctly. The obfuscation factor is customer-defined. We will intensify our capacity to productize without reducing our ability to recontextualize. It sounds stupefying, but it's 100% entirely realistic! Imagine a combination of DOM and XML. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack methodologies. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be impactful? We constantly aggregate cross-media platforms. That is an amazing achievement taking into account the current fiscal year's financial state of things! The ability to grow holistically leads to the power to envisioneer perfectly.