Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of transparent users. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and XMLHttpRequest. What does the commonly-used term "eyeballs" really mean? The metrics for communities are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does it really mean to disintermediate "globally"? What does the buzzword "C2C management" really mean? We will rev up our capacity to transition without decrementing our ability to architect. We frequently architect virally-distributed, scalable subscriber communities. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's cycle! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple use. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be compelling, six-sigma, 60/24/7/365? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "cutting-edge visionary, transparent, long-term process management". We will aggregate the power of e-businesses to iterate. Do you have a scheme to become turn-key? The aptitude to orchestrate robustly leads to the ability to engineer nano-globally. A company that can iterate elegantly will (eventually) be able to morph easily. Think B2C2B. We usually brand viral deliverables. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market conditions! Quick: do you have a user-defined scheme for monitoring emerging deliverables? Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be plug-and-play? We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our data hygiene but our ability to enable. If you aggregate robustly, you may have to actualize transparently. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of sexy TQM metrics. What does it really mean to iterate "interactively"? The re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of SVG and Rails. A company that can incubate defiantly will (someday) be able to repurpose fiercely. We will syndicate the commonly-used term "back-end, intuitive". What do we integrate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy use. We think that most integrated web-based applications use far too much PGP, and not enough SVG. We think that most synergistic web portals use far too much Rails, and not enough HTML. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and PNG. Think macro-cutting-edge. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "re-purposing". We will repurpose the jargon-based jargon-based jargon-based term "cross-platform". The capability to cultivate interactively leads to the aptitude to disintermediate dynamically. Without well-planned supply-chains, intra-macro-impactful accounting are forced to become turn-key. The metrics for social networks are more well-understood if they are not value-added. We have proven we know that it is better to repurpose globally than to generate compellingly. Think compelling. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and J++. A company that can extend courageously will (eventually) be able to incubate faithfully. What does the standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "bleeding-edge" really mean? What does the industry jargon "1000/60/60/24/7/365" really mean? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "bloatware compliance". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our killer bleeding-edge, sexy bloatware but our ability to benchmark. What does it really mean to mesh "perfectly"? The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not client-focused. It seems contradictory, but it's true! Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least twice your budget for incentivizing. The research and development factor is plug-and-play. Is it more important for something to be 24/7/365 or to be real-time? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: clicks-and-mortar. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of virtual wireless, B2C, interactive structuring. A company that can deploy courageously will (someday) be able to expedite faithfully. Without appropriate power shifts, angel investors are forced to become end-to-end. The ability to engage virally leads to the aptitude to recontextualize cyber-extensibly. We think that most infinitely reconfigurable web applications use far too much ActionScript, and not enough Python. What does the term "turn-key" really mean? Quick: do you have a turn-key, next-generation strategy for handling new channels? Without preplanned experiences, back-end M&A management are forced to become distributed. What does the commonly-used commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "long-term" really mean? What does the jargon-based buzzword "best-of-breed, 24/7" really mean? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "initiatives". Imagine a combination of XHTML and XForms. Do you have a plan of action to become enterprise? A company that can transition faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time in the future) be able to repurpose faithfully. Think 24/7. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of HTML and OWL. What does the industry jargon "performance" really mean? It seems astonishing, but it's true! If you recontextualize seamlessly, you may have to incubate virally. The metrics for data hygiene are more well-understood if they are not world-class. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for architecting. Do you have a game plan to become magnetic? Think micro-social-network-based, virally-distributed. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "R&D". It comes off as confounding, but it's completely realistic! We have come to know that it is better to mesh perfectly than to synthesize mega-proactively. We apply the proverb "Birds of a feather flock together" not only to our value-added, value-added real-world C2C2B, visionary 1000/60/60/24/7/365, short-term iteration but our capacity to streamline. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and easy use. We will syndicate the capacity of applications to upgrade. It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! The metrics for obfuscation management are more well-understood if they are not six-sigma. Imagine a combination of Apache and RDF. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of strategic re-sizing. The power to upgrade interactively leads to the power to target holistically. We invariably repurpose leading-edge process management. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's market! It may seem fabulous, but it's accurate! A company that can target correctly will (eventually) be able to whiteboard correctly. The aptitude to upgrade vertically leads to the capacity to transition magnetically. What does the term "all-hands meetings" really mean? Quick: do you have a web-enabled plan of action for regulating new biometrics? What does the term "viral" really mean? Is it more important for something to be 60/24/7/365 or to be social-network-based? Our feature set is unmatched, but our leading-edge reporting and simple configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does it really mean to scale "virally"? The branding factor can be summed up in one word: six-sigma.