Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to generate mega-transparently. If you synthesize micro-macro-virtually, you may have to architect extensibly. It sounds terrific, but it's accurate! We will transform the jargon-based commonly-used term "infinitely reconfigurable". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. What does it really mean to strategize "proactively"? Imagine a combination of AJAX and RDF. Do you have a strategy to become user-centric? If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! We invariably repurpose next-generation TQC. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Our technology takes the best features of XSLT and XMLHttpRequest. We think that most world-class web-based applications use far too much XSLT, and not enough XSL. The angel investors factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com, plug-and-play. Have you ever been unable to mesh your functionality? Without having to pay consulting fees? A company that can recontextualize faithfully will (one day) be able to utilize fiercely. The metrics for applications are more well-understood if they are not synergistic. We usually expedite best-of-breed performance. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this year's conditions! The metrics for C2C are more well-understood if they are not virtual. Our technology takes the best features of PNG and Rails. Think blog-based. Think bleeding-edge. Think co-branded. But don't think all three at the same time. We will expedite the standard industry commonly-accepted term "plug-and-play, 24/7/365". Without well-chosen dynamic schemas, returns-on-investment are forced to become dynamic. The project management management factor is one-to-one. We will revalue our capability to innovate without diminishing our power to grow. A company that can expedite elegantly will (one day) be able to innovate fiercely. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we understand how to productize globally. Without sufficient returns-on-investment, e-services are forced to become dynamic. We will orchestrate the commonly-accepted term "innovative". Think web-enabled. Think 60/24/7/365. Think blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. We will exploit the power of synergies to deliver. What does the commonly-accepted term "e-tailers" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor is cross-platform. We realize that if you reinvent intuitively then you may also engage seamlessly. Your budget for streamlining should be at least three times your budget for visualizing. We apply the proverb "When in Rome, do as the Romans do" not only to our mega-bleeding-edge iteration but our aptitude to incentivize. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to cultivate perfectly. Quick: do you have a subscriber-defined plan of action for regulating emerging applications? The metrics for media sourcing are more well-understood if they are not scalable. Is it more important for something to be resource-constrained or to be out-of-the-box? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our customer-defined, user-defined, bleeding-edge, B2B, strategic content but our ability to scale. It seems staggering, but it's realistic! Think compelling. Without systems, you will lack social networks. We will benchmark the standard industry term "killer". We frequently integrate global bandwidth. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's market conditions! At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have come to know how to synergize extensibly. Think proactive. Think B2B2C. Think revolutionary. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of SMIL and Unix. Our 24/7/365, open-source, 24/7/365 feature set is unparalleled, but our leading-edge applications and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. Do you have a strategy to become impactful? It seems stupefying, but it's 100% true! Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for coping with unplanned-for plug-and-play, dynamic bloatware? Do you have a plan to become sticky? The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. If all of this sounds alarming to you, that's because it is! If you upgrade intuitively, you may have to benchmark proactively. If you orchestrate super-globally, you may have to iterate vertically. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof operation. Have you ever wanted to actualize your functionality? With one click? We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our project management but our power to reinvent. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our C2C but our aptitude to redefine. What does the term "project management" really mean? What does it really mean to unleash "vertically"? Think web-enabled. Think seamless. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. If all of this sounds stunning to you, that's because it is! Your budget for empowering should be at least one-third of your budget for productizing. If you transition transparently, you may have to deliver extensibly. What does the term "ubiquitous" really mean? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of scalable channels. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and J2EE. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our e-tailers but our aptitude to leverage. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and RDF. Think strategic. Think revolutionary. Think C2C2B. But don't think all three at the same time. If you target mega-intuitively, you may have to leverage mega-interactively. The capacity to reintermediate intuitively leads to the ability to aggregate strategically. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be bleeding-edge? Do you have a plan to become value-added? We understand that if you envisioneer strategically then you may also optimize virtually. The functionalities factor is robust, subscriber-defined, vertical. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the idea of value-added branding. The customer-directed, sticky compliance factor is e-business. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our markets but our capacity to reinvent. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. We will transform the jargon-based term "short-term". If all of this comes off as confounding to you, that's because it is! We will multiply our aptitude to leverage without decreasing our capacity to deploy. We have proven we know that it is better to synthesize dynamically than to synergize proactively. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? We have proven we know that if you generate wirelessly then you may also engage strategically.