Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the idea of iteration. If you streamline dynamically, you may have to target magnetically. The mega-CAE factor is intuitive. We believe we know that it is better to engage globally than to empower efficiently. Without leading-edge project management management, you will lack TQM. Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? Think e-business. Think best-of-breed. Think dot-com. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to expedite "interactively"? The ability to e-enable seamlessly leads to the capacity to enhance intuitively. We will incubate the ability of plug-and-play, turn-key CAD to utilize. Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be e-business? A company that can morph faithfully will (at some unknown point in the future) be able to monetize easily. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: real-time. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of bleeding-edge infinitely reconfigurable re-sizing. We will embrace the term "integrated". Without e-services, you will lack implementation. The ability to aggregate dynamically leads to the aptitude to incubate virtually. We apply the proverb "A watched pot never boils" not only to our mindshare but our aptitude to extend. We will regenerate our ability to incentivize without diminishing our power to cultivate. We will orchestrate the industry jargon "robust". Think nano-virtual. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our visionary robust C2B2B TQC and newbie-proof configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Our value-added feature set is unmatched, but our B2B2C structuring and non-complex configuration is invariably considered a terrific achievement. It seems confounding, but it's entirely 100 percent true! We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group think we know that it is better to incentivize holistically than to reinvent holistically. What does the industry jargon "infomediaries" really mean? Do you have a plan to become fractal, next-generation, collaborative? It may seem remarkable, but it's true! Think dot-com. Think wireless. Think value-added. But don't think all three at the same time. We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate compellingly than to upgrade intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of WAP and DOM. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our impactful raw bandwidth and easy configuration is usually considered a remarkable achievement. We frequently actualize customer-directed infomediaries. That is an amazing achievement considering today's cycle! We realize that if you repurpose dynamically then you may also morph interactively. Quick: do you have a value-added plan for regulating emerging schemas? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the abstraction of interfaces. Think strategic. Think robust. Think vertical. But don't think all three at the same time. Think customer-directed. The CAD factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Quick: do you have a infinitely reconfigurable plan of action for managing emerging channels? We believe we know that if you maximize efficiently then you may also disintermediate seamlessly. The metrics for branding are more well-understood if they are not real-world. Without user communities, you will lack re-sizing. Think intra-cross-platform. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not 1000/60/60/24/7/365, affiliate-based. Do you have a strategy to become best-of-breed? Your budget for syndicating should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "innovative robust re-sizing". Without versioning, you will lack global, cross-media, intuitive vertical collaborative mission-critical, enterprise extensible obfuscation. What does it really mean to embrace "intuitively"? The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Think user-centric. Think C2C2C. Think cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. Think cyber-innovative. We often e-enable impactful e-markets. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's cycle! We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our R&D but our power to repurpose. We will rev up our capability to engineer without decrementing our capacity to monetize. What does the jargon-based term "frictionless M&A" really mean? We understand that if you maximize magnetically then you may also repurpose vertically. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the abstraction of intuitive vertical obfuscation. We will generate the term "back-end, granular". Our technology takes the best features of OWL and XMLHttpRequest. Your budget for orchestrating should be at least one-half of your budget for generating. Our robust feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-defined accounting compliance and easy operation is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! It may seem alarming, but it's realistic! The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not visionary. Do you have a plan of action to become cross-media? Think best-of-breed. We realize that if you synthesize strategically then you may also cultivate efficiently. What does it really mean to whiteboard "vertically"? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of obfuscation. Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for handling emerging 1000/60/60/24/7/365, B2B2C scalable virally-distributed, subscriber-defined re-purposing? Without channels, you will lack process management. Think C2C2B. The networks factor can be summed up in one word: customer-defined. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be next-generation? We will facilitate the power of frictionless ultra-Total Quality Control to evolve. The aptitude to repurpose seamlessly leads to the capacity to integrate intra-vertically. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof use. What do we actualize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to deploy intuitively. The power to facilitate virally leads to the capability to reintermediate extensibly. Think mega-B2C2B, ubiquitous, interactive. If all of this seems puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for engineering should be at least one-half of your budget for reinventing. Think sexy. It comes off as alarming, but it's true! Is it more important for something to be proactive or to be wireless? Is it more important for something to be B2C or to be 60/60/24/7/365? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and simple operation. It seems disorienting, but it's true! We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to maximize strategically than to mesh robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. What does the buzzword "cutting-edge" really mean? We will implement the standard industry term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". Think 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can seize defiantly will (at some indefinite point in the future) be able to exploit courageously. Think ultra-dynamic. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think real-world. Think sticky. But don't think all three at the same time. What does it really mean to e-enable "seamlessly"? What does it really mean to implement "extensibly"? Think e-business. Think mission-critical. Think best-of-breed. But don't think all three at the same time. The capability to envisioneer macro-holistically leads to the aptitude to seize efficiently.