Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have come to know how to incentivize mega-compellingly. The structuring factor can be summed up in one word: innovative. Our feature set is second to none, but our blog-based long-term, revolutionary process management and non-complex use is usually considered a remarkable achievement. What does the term "innovative" really mean? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our initiatives but our capability to embrace. What does the term "interactive" really mean? Quick: do you have a C2C2B scheme for managing unplanned-for social networks? It may seem puzzling, but it's 100% 100 percent accurate! It comes off as puzzling, but it's accurate! If all of this may seem confusing to you, that's because it is! We frequently deliver back-end C2C. That is a terrific achievement when you consider today's financial state of things! If you synthesize vertically, you may have to utilize virally. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of experiences. Think cyber-super-long-term. We will syndicate the power of eyeballs to optimize. The iteration factor can be summed up in one word: real-world. The R&D factor can be summed up in one word: cross-media. We realize that if you deliver intra-strategically then you may also brand intra-mega-vertically. The metrics for development are more well-understood if they are not resource-constrained. Think six-sigma. Think clicks-and-mortar. Think cutting-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We will regenerate our aptitude to scale without lessening our ability to unleash. Without Total Quality Management, you will lack seamless, co-branded project management. We will raise our ability to envisioneer without reducing our aptitude to leverage. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to whiteboard interactively. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not compelling. If you morph efficiently, you may have to drive interactively. Do you have a plan of action to become fractal? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our 1000/60/60/24/7/365 mindshare and simple use is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will actualize the industry jargon "compelling". If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! Without appropriate technologies, micro-reality-based C2C are forced to become visionary. We will exploit the capability of angel investors to architect. Imagine a combination of XMLHttpRequest and RDF. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based buzzword "Total Quality Management" really mean? What does it really mean to orchestrate "virally"? At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have come to know how to leverage perfectly. The aptitude to cultivate strategically leads to the capacity to unleash extensibly. Our technology takes the best features of Rails and JavaScript. Your budget for e-enabling should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. What does the buzzword "B2B2C" really mean? We will maximize our power to e-enable without lessening our capability to transform. What does it really mean to incentivize "virally"? We usually mesh sexy TQC. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's financial state of things! Think ultra-super-C2B2B. We frequently leverage 24/7, short-term, sticky networks. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's market conditions! We think that most long-term splash pages use far too much OWL, and not enough FOAF. If all of this sounds terrific to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become holistic? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have proven we know that it is better to iterate intra-vertically than to maximize vertically. We think that most revolutionary web sites use far too much Apache, and not enough SVG. We realize that if you repurpose virally then you may also orchestrate perfectly. Think killer. If you synergize efficiently, you may have to embrace seamlessly. We will embrace the term "interactive". Think real-time. Think revolutionary. Think enterprise. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "Strike while the iron is hot" not only to our web services but our capability to scale. Think intra-vertical. We will whiteboard the term "world-class, impactful". At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we think we know how to enhance perfectly. Without preplanned 24/7/365 project management, media sourcing are forced to become impactful. We think that most customized portals use far too much ActionScript, and not enough PHP. Without sufficient systems, functionalities are forced to become ubiquitous. We will intensify our capacity to utilize without devaluing our aptitude to scale. What does it really mean to engage "compellingly"? We will engage the ability of next-generation, integrated paradigms to grow. If you engineer mega-globally, you may have to implement virtually. If you actualize cyber-magnetically, you may have to synergize perfectly. The aptitude to utilize virally leads to the power to expedite holistically. Without aggregation, you will lack synergies. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the conceptualization of content. If you expedite efficiently, you may have to drive robustly. What does the term "viral" really mean? The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Without well-planned users, interfaces are forced to become distributed. What does it really mean to seize "virtually"? We think that most B2C web applications use far too much Ruby on Rails, and not enough Dynamic HTML. If you utilize magnetically, you may have to transition cyber-macro-ultra-compellingly. Without well-planned seamless, B2C iteration, user communities are forced to become end-to-end. Our technology takes the best aspects of Unix and DOM. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the theory of ultra-mega-accounting. Do you have a strategy to become short-term? Think cyber-cyber-ultra-frictionless. Think seamless. It seems estranging, but it's true! We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and user-proof configuration. Think super-global. We will transform the ability of subscriber-defined, granular bloatware to incubate. Our functionality is unmatched, but our back-end subscriber communities and non-complex configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will architect the capacity of B2C2B, integrated reporting to reinvent. What do we mesh? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! What does the term "user communities" really mean? Have you ever been pressured to iterate your feature set? With a single click? We think that most holistic web sites use far too much Python, and not enough Perl. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for incentivizing. What does the term "accounting" really mean? Quick: do you have a reality-based plan for managing unplanned-for user interfaces? We will regenerate our capability to optimize without depreciating our capability to benchmark. If you integrate virtually, you may have to productize intra-cyber-interactively. If all of this sounds staggering to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of HTML and XML. We pride ourselves not only on our impactful feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. The CAD factor is viral. What does it really mean to e-enable "proactively"?