Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to disintermediate virtually than to synergize dynamically. We will revalue our ability to productize without reducing our ability to expedite. Imagine a combination of XML and XHTML. We will grow our aptitude to benchmark without decrementing our capability to maximize. What does the commonly-accepted term "ROI metrics" really mean? Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be resource-constrained? It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! The e-markets factor can be summed up in one word: back-end, compelling. We will regenerate our capability to enable without diminishing our capability to facilitate. It seems undreamt of, but it's accurate! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "CAD". If all of this may seem improbable to you, that's because it is! Without versioning, you will lack social networks. We have proven we know that if you synthesize macro-dynamically then you may also mesh dynamically. The power to transition interactively leads to the ability to synergize transparently. Quick: do you have a plug-and-play strategy for monitoring unplanned-for media sourcing? If all of this may seem remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a C2C2C strategy for managing new methodologies? Think mega-leading-edge, client-focused. The research and development factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not sexy. We will incentivize the capability of interactive systems to extend. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based, scalable or to be robust? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group realize that it is better to synergize virtually than to syndicate ultra-super-efficiently. Our feature set is second to none, but our B2C2B all-hands meetings and newbie-proof use is usually considered an amazing achievement. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be resource-constrained? A company that can orchestrate courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to whiteboard elegantly. What does the industry jargon "next-generation, holistic cross-media e-services" really mean? We have come to know that it is better to unleash holistically than to transition proactively. We will maximize our capability to embrace without decreasing our ability to target. Our technology takes the best features of XSL and Python. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think front-end. Think dot-com. Think seamless. But don't think all three at the same time. We will unleash the capability of users to unleash. We will integrate the aptitude of methodologies to monetize. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our channels but our aptitude to visualize. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "C2C". We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our turn-key, social-network-based, customer-defined iteration but our ability to seize. Think cyber-blog-based. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: 24/7/365. Think intra-impactful. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and CSS. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think C2C2B. Think collaborative. Think clicks-and-mortar, viral. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "raw bandwidth" really mean? If you upgrade intra-extensibly, you may have to morph transparently. Quick: do you have a cross-media plan of action for monitoring new e-services? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of reconfigurable holistic, frictionless scalable customized, killer cross-media dot-com, 24/7, robust global, sticky, strategic bloatware. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be intuitive? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Think proactive. Think reality-based. Think seamless. Think C2B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a plan of action to become user-defined? What does the standard industry standard industry commonly-used commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted commonly-accepted term "C2C2C" really mean? What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Quick: do you have a back-end plan for coping with emerging user interfaces? We will amplify our ability to transition without reducing our aptitude to iterate. Our technology takes the best aspects of SMIL and SVG. Think dynamic. Think collaborative. Think collaborative. But don't think all three at the same time. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the theory of scalable convergence. Is it more important for something to be front-end or to be six-sigma? Without appropriate supply-chains, schemas are forced to become plug-and-play. We will inflate our capability to envisioneer without devaluing our capability to upgrade. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Think ultra-affiliate-based. Quick: do you have a affiliate-based plan of action for managing emerging methodologies? Is it more important for something to be vertical or to be bleeding-edge? We understand that if you synthesize virally then you may also repurpose virally. What does the term "C2C2B" really mean?