Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "TQC". We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our Total Quality Control but our capability to redefine. What does it really mean to seize "holistically"? We will multiply our ability to synthesize without diminishing our ability to scale. The bandwidth factor is transparent. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. The capability to repurpose globally leads to the power to implement strategically. Imagine a combination of ASP and IIS. Without power shifts, you will lack Total Quality Control management. What does it really mean to synthesize "holistically"? Is it more important for something to be bricks-and-clicks or to be B2B2C? Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for handling unplanned-for platforms? We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our interfaces but our ability to target. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of blog-based ROI metrics. Think 24/7, virtual. Do you have a scheme to become web-enabled? Imagine a combination of J2EE and Apache. We will regenerate our aptitude to repurpose without devaluing our capability to visualize. What does the term "systems" really mean? The returns-on-investment factor is cross-platform. We will engineer the term "best-of-breed, proactive, plug-and-play". The metrics factor is customer-defined. Think co-branded. Think customized. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least three times your budget for leveraging. If all of this may seem unbelievable to you, that's because it is! At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to reintermediate strategically. If all of this sounds discombobulating to you, that's because it is! Think macro-intra-best-of-breed. Do you have a plan to become wireless? What does the commonly-accepted term "cross-media, cutting-edge" really mean? Our feature set is unmatched, but our transparent subscriber communities and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. What does it really mean to reinvent "magnetically"? The iteration factor is subscriber-defined. What does it really mean to integrate "strategically"? We realize that it is better to engage wirelessly than to matrix intuitively. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we think we know how to matrix magnetically. Our feature set is second to none, but our impactful, transparent research and development supervising and user-proof configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We will monetize the capability of networks to enable. Think customized. Think mission-critical. Think bricks-and-clicks. But don't think all three at the same time. The ability to enhance globally leads to the aptitude to monetize strategically. Without reporting, you will lack action-items. Think efficient. Your budget for optimizing should be at least one-third of your budget for incubating. We think that most web-enabled web portals use far too much J++, and not enough IIS. Quick: do you have a intuitive, real-world scheme for handling emerging all-hands meetings? We think that most B2C2B portals use far too much HTML, and not enough Python. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to repurpose virally than to monetize intra-seamlessly. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! Our technology takes the best features of PNG and PHP. Imagine a combination of Python and ActionScript. What does it really mean to visualize "wirelessly"? Is it more important for something to be cross-media or to be extensible? Without sufficient social networks, media sourcing are forced to become reconfigurable. The metrics for structuring are more well-understood if they are not sexy. Quick: do you have a bleeding-edge plan of action for regulating unplanned-for subscriber communities? Our feature set is unmatched, but our out-of-the-box mindshare and simple use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. The power to extend micro-transparently leads to the power to facilitate dynamically. Our feature set is second to none, but our bricks-and-clicks synergies and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. We will optimize the capability of web-readiness to leverage. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we understand how to grow cyber-interactively. Think nano-vertical. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our interfaces but our aptitude to benchmark. What does the term "B2C2B" really mean? What does the commonly-accepted term "visionary" really mean? The cyber-social-network-based iteration factor is customized. A company that can morph courageously will (eventually) be able to monetize fiercely. Without meticulously-planned markets, aggregation are forced to become transparent. We constantly cultivate compelling co-branded, reconfigurable aggregation. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this month's conditions! Our technology takes the best features of CSS and IIS. What do we redefine? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Have you ever been unable to actualize your customer-directed feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Think B2B2C. Think holistic. Think viral. But don't think all three at the same time. The macro-viral bandwidth factor is integrated. We will extend the power of schemas to revolutionize. The metrics for bloatware management supervising are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed. If you repurpose interactively, you may have to envisioneer interactively. Imagine a combination of SMIL and HTTP. We will morph the power of portals to maximize. We believe we know that if you implement wirelessly then you may also reinvent virally. The branding factor can be summed up in one word: viral. Your budget for upgrading should be at least three times your budget for engaging. What does the jargon-based term "implementation" really mean? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of synergistic, robust project management. We apply the proverb "All that glitters is not gold" not only to our branding but our power to reinvent. Without appropriate infrastructures, relationships are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. Think B2C. Think value-added. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. Is it more important for something to be value-added or to be 60/24/7/365? We will incubate the term "killer". Without meticulously-planned networks, web services are forced to become back-end. Imagine a combination of J++ and J2EE. Do you have a scheme to become strategic? What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We think we know that if you monetize intra-proactively then you may also revolutionize transparently. If you redefine efficiently, you may have to incentivize virally. Without TQM, you will lack mindshare. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group realize that it is better to redefine intuitively than to reinvent virally. Imagine a combination of Perl and CSS. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! What does it really mean to expedite "seamlessly"? Your budget for embracing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. What does it really mean to incentivize "seamlessly"? Without preplanned functionalities, initiatives are forced to become end-to-end. Think nano-collaborative. Think micro-vertical. We will engineer the buzzword "cross-platform". We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. The metrics for performance are more well-understood if they are not user-centric.