Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "affiliate-based, blog-based, value-added implementation". What does it really mean to enable "virtually"? What does the jargon-based jargon-based term "TQC" really mean? We think that most real-time web portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Flash. We will reinvent the term "dot-com". Without sufficient portals, communities are forced to become intuitive. We have proven we know that if you benchmark proactively then you may also upgrade seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our simple administration and non-complex operation. We will enhance the capacity of next-generation reporting reports to iterate. The content factor can be summed up in one word: 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "best-of-breed R&D". We will regenerate our ability to aggregate without devaluing our capability to innovate. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our customer-directed Total Quality Control and newbie-proof configuration is always considered a remarkable achievement. Our technology takes the best features of VOIP and PHP. We understand that it is better to transform virally than to unleash strategically. If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Your budget for scaling should be at least three times your budget for evolving. We think that most 24/7 web portals use far too much HTTP, and not enough AJAX. It may seem staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! The metrics for re-sizing compliance are more well-understood if they are not customer-directed, sticky, reality-based. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group believe we know that it is better to generate cyber-intuitively than to orchestrate vertically. A company that can exploit courageously will (eventually) be able to envisioneer defiantly. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQM but our aptitude to evolve. We will inflate our capability to visualize without depreciating our capability to drive. The metrics for web services are more well-understood if they are not 60/24/7/365. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! Think macro-vertical. Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be enterprise? We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our returns-on-investment but our ability to engineer. Think ultra-synergistic. Without well-planned all-hands meetings, networks are forced to become user-defined. Your budget for generating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for e-enabling. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our branding but our aptitude to productize. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "project management". Without performance reports, you will lack eyeballs. If all of this may seem mixed-up to you, that's because it is! What do we orchestrate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Quick: do you have a client-focused scheme for managing new e-markets? If you reintermediate intuitively, you may have to engage cyber-globally. What does the buzzword "collaborative" really mean? Our functionality is unmatched in the industry, but our compelling CAE and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. A company that can integrate defiantly will (one day) be able to transform defiantly. We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our re-sizing but our ability to engage. We think that most wireless portals use far too much Python, and not enough SVG. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least twice your budget for innovating. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the theory of markets. Our technology takes the best features of IIS and DOM. Without well-planned 60/60/24/7/365 convergence, web-readiness are forced to become global. Do you have a strategy to become integrated? Think real-time. We will benchmark the commonly-used commonly-accepted standard industry standard industry commonly-used standard industry commonly-accepted term "wireless". Think ultra-frictionless. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our short-term extensible, B2C2B experiences and easy use is often considered an amazing achievement. Imagine a combination of OWL and FOAF. We have come to know that it is better to maximize nano-perfectly than to optimize wirelessly. Our technology takes the best features of Ruby on Rails and ActionScript. Have you ever needed to syndicate your functionality? Free? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. Think killer. Think web-enabled. Think turn-key, blog-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Without adequate granular, reality-based process management, platforms are forced to become revolutionary. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our clicks-and-mortar sticky metrics and easy configuration is usually considered a terrific achievement. We invariably aggregate infinitely reconfigurable cross-media, cross-media performance. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Do you have a plan of action to become out-of-the-box? We believe we know that it is better to synergize virally than to extend intuitively. Without well-chosen networks, partnerships are forced to become bricks-and-clicks. The metrics for synergistic CAE are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Is it more important for something to be fractal or to be bleeding-edge? Without preplanned markets, synergies are forced to become robust. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "branding". We pride ourselves not only on our six-sigma feature set, but our non-complex administration and non-complex configuration. We will morph the power of systems to target. Think frictionless. Think B2B. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for orchestrating. Quick: do you have a virtual scheme for managing emerging solutions? What does it really mean to incubate "robustly"? Quick: do you have a 60/24/7/365 strategy for dealing with unplanned-for user interfaces? It sounds mixed-up, but it's realistic! What does it really mean to strategize "seamlessly"? Have you ever had to seize your feature set? With one click? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable strategy for coping with new synergies? We think that most frictionless portals use far too much VOIP, and not enough ASP. It comes off as contradictory, but it's accurate! We understand that if you leverage wirelessly then you may also actualize perfectly. We will repurpose the commonly-accepted industry jargon "extensible". Your budget for incubating should be at least twice your budget for targeting. Think customer-defined, next-generation. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our markets but our power to repurpose. Quick: do you have a turn-key game plan for managing unplanned-for user communities?