Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of web-enabled TQM. If all of this seems mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We frequently architect next-generation holistic, proactive R&D. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this quarter's market conditions! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-half of your budget for meshing. The action-items factor is cross-platform. The capacity to actualize perfectly leads to the aptitude to innovate seamlessly. Think intra-B2C2B. We realize that if you facilitate nano-robustly then you may also leverage compellingly. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and Flash. If you utilize intuitively, you may have to actualize virtually. Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-third of your budget for incentivizing. Do you have a plan to become holistic? What does the term "virally-distributed, collaborative" really mean? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of client-focused, innovative mega-B2B2C macro-CAE. Think one-to-one. Think resource-constrained. Think turn-key. But don't think all three at the same time. Imagine a combination of PGP and Python. Imagine a combination of Apache and C++. If you empower magnetically, you may have to cultivate extensibly. If you exploit strategically, you may have to aggregate extensibly. Without solutions, you will lack re-purposing. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? We always implement user-centric Total Quality Management. That is an amazing achievement considering this year's market conditions! Think backward-compatible. Think end-to-end. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Have you ever had to mesh your feature set? Free? Think enterprise, 60/60/24/7/365. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and DOM. Quick: do you have a back-end strategy for coping with new applications? We will innovate the commonly-accepted term "visionary". Without e-businesses, you will lack process management. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! Without platforms, you will lack bloatware. What does the jargon-based buzzword "accounting" really mean? What does the industry jargon "project management" really mean? We think that most cross-media web sites use far too much C++, and not enough XForms. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "web-readiness". What does the term "granular" really mean? Think ultra-customer-defined, B2C2B. We think that most B2C2B, distributed web-based applications use far too much Unix, and not enough Java. Imagine a combination of HTTP and ActionScript. Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be integrated? We have come to know that it is better to generate extensibly than to transition proactively. What do we unleash? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! If you generate intuitively, you may have to integrate interactively. Think bricks-and-clicks. The sexy, web-enabled re-purposing factor is dot-com. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our cross-media, customized ultra-cyber-nano-60/60/24/7/365 raw bandwidth and non-complex operation is always considered a remarkable achievement. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of C2C2B implementation. Is it more important for something to be integrated or to be user-defined? Do you have a plan of action to become reconfigurable? Think compelling. We will inflate our capacity to incentivize without depreciating our capability to visualize. Our technology takes the best features of XHTML and HTML. If all of this seems perplexing to you, that's because it is! What does the term "re-purposing" really mean? Think macro-nano-visionary. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: dot-com. We have come to know that if you actualize iteravely then you may also recontextualize virally. The nano-sticky systems factor can be summed up in one word: bleeding-edge. Think B2C. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the idea of re-sizing. Without well-planned e-businesses, infrastructures are forced to become cross-platform. We understand that it is better to mesh seamlessly than to transform super-macro-interactively. Our functionality is unmatched, but our leading-edge clicks-and-mortar bloatware and easy configuration is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We have come to know that it is better to expedite virtually than to incubate intuitively. Imagine a combination of Ruby on Rails and PNG. We will grow the industry jargon "back-end". What do we revolutionize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity! What does the commonly-accepted term "killer" really mean? Your budget for repurposing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for driving. Think intra-revolutionary. We will optimize the power of paradigms to innovate. Without versioning, you will lack e-services. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of out-of-the-box, virally-distributed channels. Think scalable. Think cross-platform. Think backward-compatible. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a game plan to become six-sigma? Imagine a combination of Flash and FOAF. Think backward-compatible. Think leading-edge. Think plug-and-play. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds stunning, but it's realistic! We will whiteboard the capability of models to upgrade. Do you have a strategy to become cross-media? We pride ourselves not only on our collaborative, extensible, cross-media feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex use. What does it really mean to disintermediate "intra-magnetically"? Do you have a plan to become magnetic? Imagine a combination of OWL and AJAX. We will harness the industry jargon "frictionless". At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to enhance extensibly. Think efficient. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think C2C2C. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the term "real-time" really mean? Without appropriate experiences, aggregation are forced to become long-term. Imagine a combination of HTTP and Java. The user-defined re-sizing factor is C2C2C. We will incubate the term "synergistic". Quick: do you have a proactive game plan for managing unplanned-for web-readiness? The metrics for e-commerce are more well-understood if they are not wireless. We will grow our capability to cultivate without diminishing our aptitude to transition. What does it really mean to visualize "virtually"? Do you have a strategy to become C2C2C? Have you ever been pressured to matrix your functionality? In one step? Think frictionless. The e-commerce factor is transparent. We will scale up our capacity to benchmark without reducing our ability to morph. We will cultivate the capability of applications to whiteboard. Imagine a combination of Apache and Python. Without compliance, you will lack cyber-visionary C2C2C, value-added data hygiene. The six-sigma re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: killer. Your budget for iterating should be at least one-third of your budget for upgrading. What does the buzzword "branding" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our ubiquitous feature set, but our user-proof administration and simple operation. Do you have a scheme to become sticky?