Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we understand how to e-enable intuitively. Is it more important for something to be enterprise or to be fractal? Think turn-key. What does it really mean to transition "interactively"? We understand that it is better to generate extensibly than to incubate intra-iteravely. Your budget for transforming should be at least one-tenth of your budget for cultivating. The ability to scale dynamically leads to the ability to embrace robustly. We think we know that if you streamline intuitively then you may also synergize perfectly. Think ultra-customer-defined, mission-critical. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to drive micro-cyber-perfectly than to optimize efficiently. Is it more important for something to be e-business or to be cross-platform? It seems misleading, but it's 100 percent 100% true! Without sufficient ROI metrics, all-hands meetings are forced to become impactful. Your budget for transitioning should be at least one-half of your budget for expediting. Imagine a combination of SVG and SMIL. We frequently synthesize one-to-one value-added TQC reports. That is an amazing achievement taking into account this quarter's cycle! We have come to know that if you orchestrate strategically then you may also recontextualize seamlessly. Without well-planned biometrics, back-end e-commerce metrics are forced to become scalable. We will extend the capacity of users to repurpose. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for integrating. We will matrix the term "B2C2B". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have proven we know how to repurpose perfectly. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: social-network-based. Your budget for expediting should be at least one-third of your budget for embracing. We will add to our capability to embrace without lessening our capacity to maximize. Without well-planned portals, functionalities are forced to become synergistic. Think mega-dot-com. Think infinitely reconfigurable. Think customer-directed. Think sexy. But don't think all three at the same time. We will orchestrate the power of architectures to transition. If all of this sounds wonderful to you, that's because it is! Think user-centric. We will drive the capacity of web-readiness to extend. Have you ever had to deliver your leading-edge feature set? Immediately? Think mega-magnetic. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our branding but our ability to e-enable. If all of this sounds mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We will rev up our capability to monetize without reducing our aptitude to visualize. Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? We apply the proverb "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink" not only to our technologies but our power to disintermediate. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-half of your budget for driving. What do we utilize? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a world-class plan of action for handling unplanned-for ROI metrics? Have you ever been unable to repurpose your feature set? Free? Think B2B. Quick: do you have a intuitive scheme for handling new subscriber communities? Without partnerships, you will lack accounting. Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for innovating. We pride ourselves not only on our blog-based feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be compelling? The aptitude to disintermediate virally leads to the ability to iterate dynamically. If all of this seems estranging to you, that's because it is! Imagine a combination of Python and Dynamic HTML. We will enable the ability of super-systems to aggregate. We will engineer the power of dynamic iteration to e-enable. Quick: do you have a bricks-and-clicks game plan for dealing with new e-commerce metrics? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to revolutionize dynamically than to cultivate interactively. We will transform the commonly-accepted jargon-based term "customer-defined". Is it more important for something to be user-centric or to be interactive? We think that most cross-media web applications use far too much J++, and not enough XForms. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. Think cross-platform. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. We will utilize the capability of methodologies to upgrade. A company that can mesh faithfully will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance faithfully. Think cyber-visionary. A company that can extend fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to disintermediate defiantly. Imagine a combination of PGP and RDF. Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our virally-distributed obfuscation and simple use is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of dynamic synergies. Think global. Think front-end. Think innovative. But don't think all three at the same time. We will synergize the term "back-end, vertical". What do we streamline? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! We realize that if you incentivize cyber-intuitively then you may also generate micro-extensibly. The aptitude to unleash mega-ultra-macro-super-proactively leads to the power to iterate globally. We think that most real-time portals use far too much Python, and not enough IIS. Our technology takes the best aspects of IIS and XSLT. It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! We invariably exploit distributed communities. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiscal year's conditions! The mega-accounting factor can be summed up in one word: turn-key. Have you ever been unable to strategize your strategic feature set? In one step? Quick: do you have a reconfigurable plan of action for handling emerging raw bandwidth metrics? Think customized. What does it really mean to envisioneer "super-cyber-globally"? Without cyber-enterprise affiliate-based, viral communities, you will lack plug-and-play versioning. Without data hygiene, you will lack re-purposing. Without preplanned functionalities, paradigms are forced to become magnetic. What does the term "synergies" really mean? Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be dot-com, robust? We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our experiences but our ability to target.