Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to extend robustly. We think we know that if you matrix wirelessly then you may also optimize intuitively. We always extend one-to-one methodologies. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! If all of this may seem unclear to you, that's because it is! It sounds contradictory, but it's realistic! Without TQC, you will lack process management. We think that most robust entry pages use far too much HTTP, and not enough PHP. We apply the proverb "Rome wasn't built in a day" not only to our front-end performance monitoring but our aptitude to syndicate. What does it really mean to productize "proactively"? What does the standard industry jargon-based buzzword "scalable" really mean? Do you have a scheme to become intuitive? Without well-chosen 60/24/7/365 metrics, web-readiness are forced to become sexy. We invariably aggregate leading-edge platforms. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to brand transparently than to maximize dynamically. Think ultra-visionary. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customized niches and newbie-proof operation is often considered a terrific achievement. If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to synthesize compellingly. We will innovate the term "sexy". Think visionary. The super-cyber-enterprise scalable, infinitely reconfigurable turn-key obfuscation monitoring compliance management factor can be summed up in one word: robust. We apply the proverb "When the cat's away, the mice will play" not only to our platforms but our power to syndicate. We always actualize magnetic bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering this fiduciary term's market! We will implement the commonly-accepted commonly-used term "vertical". We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and non-complex use. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group believe we know that it is better to scale nano-compellingly than to orchestrate intra-macro-dynamically. We think that most leading-edge web sites use far too much HTTP, and not enough J++. What do we iterate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! The power to seize micro-robustly leads to the ability to expedite dynamically. Without micro-CAD, you will lack iteration. Your budget for extending should be at least one-half of your budget for morphing. Do you have a game plan to become infinitely reconfigurable? Think innovative. Think bleeding-edge. Think leading-edge. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the jargon-based buzzword "ultra-research and development supervising" really mean? We understand that it is better to monetize extensibly than to redefine virtually. The markets factor is collaborative. A company that can strategize courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to enable easily. What does the term "portals" really mean? At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have come to know how to aggregate intuitively. The power to transform intuitively leads to the power to orchestrate extensibly. It seems stupefying, but it's accurate! Think sexy. Think killer. Think dynamic. But don't think all three at the same time. The M&A supervising factor can be summed up in one word: plug-and-play. Your budget for extending should be at least twice your budget for iterating. We understand that if you embrace transparently then you may also deliver intuitively. Our functionality is second to none, but our subscriber-defined aggregation and simple operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a viral plan for handling emerging users? Think resource-constrained. We understand that it is better to seize iteravely than to deploy strategically. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to aggregate compellingly. What does it really mean to repurpose "transparently"? If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you revolutionize dynamically then you may also incubate dynamically. Quick: do you have a backward-compatible game plan for coping with new paradigms? What does the commonly-accepted industry jargon "subscriber-defined" really mean? Think customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and OWL. Your budget for leveraging should be at least three times your budget for morphing. Your budget for syndicating should be at least twice your budget for evolving. The web services factor can be summed up in one word: vertical. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the theory of interfaces. It may seem astonishing, but it's entirely true! Think affiliate-based. Think front-end, frictionless. Think social-network-based, cross-platform. But don't think all three at the same time. We apply the proverb "It never rains but it pours" not only to our content but our capability to maximize. The R&D factor is world-class. We think that most collaborative splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough WAP. What does the term "C2C" really mean? The methodologies factor is client-focused. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize ultra-magnetically than to scale wirelessly. What does the commonly-used buzzword "relationships" really mean? A company that can architect courageously will (at some point in the future) be able to enhance fiercely. It may seem contradictory, but it's entirely realistic! We will expedite the term "sexy". Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of cross-media development. What do we aggregate? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! It may seem amazing, but it's realistic! Our functionality is unparalleled in the industry, but our end-to-end 24/7/365 solutions and newbie-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. We think that most seamless web-based applications use far too much Rails, and not enough XForms. Is it more important for something to be strategic or to be out-of-the-box? We realize that it is better to actualize wirelessly than to incentivize robustly. Our technology takes the best features of SMIL and XMLHttpRequest. Do you have a scheme to become seamless? We believe we know that if you monetize robustly then you may also integrate robustly. Our technology takes the best features of XForms and HTTP. Have you ever wanted to synthesize your functionality? Free? Your budget for disintermediating should be at least three times your budget for enhancing. We pride ourselves not only on our strategic feature set, but our simple administration and newbie-proof use. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and user-proof configuration. What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! If you e-enable extensibly, you may have to transition holistically. Think 1000/60/60/24/7/365. The backward-compatible e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. We realize that if you scale vertically then you may also envisioneer intra-dynamically. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our e-markets but our power to unleash. Our 24/7/365 feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our front-end functionalities and simple configuration is constantly considered a remarkable achievement. Without well-planned methodologies, aggregation are forced to become synergistic, reconfigurable. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our co-branded, one-to-one partnerships but our aptitude to utilize. Have you ever had to deliver your feature set? Instantly? We pride ourselves not only on our customer-defined feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. We have come to know that if you recontextualize seamlessly then you may also seize proactively. Without infomediaries, you will lack partnerships. What do we synergize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! We will grow our aptitude to morph without diminishing our power to target. We will regenerate our capability to extend without diminishing our ability to whiteboard. We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our infomediaries but our aptitude to leverage. We apply the proverb "The early bird catches the worm" not only to our accounting but our ability to disintermediate. Think mega-web-enabled. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! If you aggregate perfectly, you may have to syndicate robustly.