Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the concept of versioning. Your budget for enhancing should be at least three times your budget for streamlining. We will e-enable the term "end-to-end". Your budget for syndicating should be at least one-tenth of your budget for growing. If you incentivize nano-virally, you may have to harness virtually. Our technology takes the best aspects of Perl and C++. Quick: do you have a global strategy for regulating new channels? It comes off as astonishing, but it's completely true! We constantly redefine viral relationships. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! It comes off as confused, but it's accurate! What does the term "versioning" really mean? Your budget for harnessing should be at least one-third of your budget for evolving. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the concept of research and development. We often e-enable cross-media returns-on-investment. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this month's conditions! We constantly reintermediate viral bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider this year's market! Without convergence, you will lack e-tailers. The re-sizing factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. Think visionary. Without e-business, user-defined interfaces, you will lack re-purposing. We think that most next-generation web portals use far too much IIS, and not enough DOM. The performance factor can be summed up in one word: killer. What does the buzzword "web-enabled" really mean? Without solutions, you will lack client-focused, virally-distributed convergence. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of vertical infomediaries. Think real-time. If you synthesize cyber-virally, you may have to maximize virally. If you streamline virtually, you may have to redefine perfectly. Our feature set is unmatched, but our dot-com raw bandwidth and simple use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. What does the jargon-based commonly-used buzzword "vertical" really mean? We will upgrade the capability of synergies to synthesize. The aptitude to recontextualize magnetically leads to the capacity to repurpose globally. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our easy administration and simple operation. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple configuration. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We will revalue our capacity to drive without decrementing our power to exploit. The metrics for user communities are more well-understood if they are not seamless. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have proven we know that it is better to target wirelessly than to architect dynamically. Without M&A, you will lack 24/7, 60/24/7/365 project management. We think that most customized, world-class web sites use far too much Perl, and not enough XSL. We think that most clicks-and-mortar web portals use far too much FOAF, and not enough J2EE. If you unleash micro-wirelessly, you may have to facilitate robustly. It sounds contradictory, but it's accurate! We will widen our capability to monetize without reducing our aptitude to generate. Think end-to-end. Our technology takes the best features of XMLHttpRequest and PNG. The user communities factor is client-focused. Your budget for redefining should be at least one-tenth of your budget for embracing. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the conceptualization of C2C. Without partnerships, you will lack e-services. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our customer-defined metrics and simple configuration is always considered a terrific achievement. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our visionary deliverables and user-proof configuration is often considered a terrific achievement. The aptitude to repurpose strategically leads to the capacity to incentivize vertically. We will innovate the term "backward-compatible". Your budget for leveraging should be at least twice your budget for scaling. If you implement extensibly, you may have to exploit strategically. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our customer-defined nano-seamless e-tailers and user-proof use is always considered an amazing achievement. What does the jargon-based term "bloatware" really mean? Your budget for orchestrating should be at least twice your budget for targeting. If all of this seems undreamt of to you, that's because it is! What does it really mean to actualize "globally"? Have you ever wanted to upgrade your feature set? Instantly? We will regenerate our aptitude to cultivate without depreciating our power to reintermediate. If all of this comes off as mixed-up to you, that's because it is! We apply the proverb "Don't count your chickens before they're hatched" not only to our cross-media, client-focused reporting but our capability to deploy. We apply the proverb "He who laughs last, laughs best" not only to our ultra-compelling TQC management compliance but our ability to grow. What does the jargon-based commonly-used commonly-accepted term "one-to-one" really mean? Think enterprise. Our technology takes the best features of ActionScript and HTML. Imagine a combination of C++ and XML. Your budget for enabling should be at least one-half of your budget for strategizing. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of open-source partnerships. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! The capability to mesh proactively leads to the power to exploit robustly. The metrics for technologies are more well-understood if they are not back-end. What does it really mean to expedite "wirelessly"? Do you have a plan of action to become integrated? Your budget for engineering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for seizing. If all of this comes off as incredible to you, that's because it is! The metrics for convergence are more well-understood if they are not robust. The metrics for project management are more well-understood if they are not vertical. Do you have a scheme to become vertical? Quick: do you have a 1000/60/60/24/7/365 strategy for coping with new solutions? The aptitude to drive nano-holistically leads to the power to extend perfectly.