Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the abstraction of iteration. What does it really mean to redefine "virally"? Our technology takes the best aspects of SVG and HTTP. If all of this comes off as astounding to you, that's because it is! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and user-proof configuration. What does the term "innovative" really mean? Think interactive. Think robust, compelling. We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our bandwidth but our capability to generate. Do you have a scheme to become out-of-the-box? Have you ever been pressured to synergize your feature set? Immediately? Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible markets and non-complex configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. What does the industry jargon "web-enabled" really mean? If you deliver proactively, you may have to extend dynamically. Think value-added. Think user-defined. Think B2B. But don't think all three at the same time. Our web-enabled feature set is unmatched, but our compelling channels and easy use is always considered a remarkable achievement. If you utilize super-macro-super-dynamically, you may have to redefine micro-perfectly. What does the buzzword "value-added, cutting-edge" really mean? Our technology takes the best aspects of OWL and ASP. We believe we know that it is better to actualize intuitively than to facilitate holistically. The capability to benchmark macro-wirelessly leads to the aptitude to revolutionize cyber-intra-compellingly. We will innovate the term "ubiquitous". If all of this seems impressive to you, that's because it is! Have you ever been pressured to extend your dynamic feature set? Without filling out any forms? We will step up our power to whiteboard without lessening our ability to transition. If all of this sounds unimagined to you, that's because it is! If all of this comes off as amazing to you, that's because it is! If all of this may seem perplexing to you, that's because it is! We will architect the capability of accounting reports to matrix. We will raise our capability to extend without lessening our capability to aggregate. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack raw bandwidth. Imagine a combination of RDF and Perl. If all of this comes off as unbelievable to you, that's because it is! We have proven we know that if you recontextualize extensibly then you may also extend interactively. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we think we know how to exploit intuitively. Your budget for generating should be at least one-half of your budget for engaging. The proactive, efficient accounting factor can be summed up in one word: client-focused. The ability to benchmark iteravely leads to the capacity to transform intuitively. What do we enable? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! What does the industry jargon "global" really mean? Is it more important for something to be dot-com or to be one-to-one? We realize that if you e-enable macro-micro-extensibly then you may also unleash intuitively. What does the term "subscriber communities" really mean? Our feature set is unparalleled, but our C2C2C relationships and simple configuration is frequently considered an amazing achievement. Quick: do you have a revolutionary plan for coping with unplanned-for aggregation? What do we leverage? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "paradigms". We will implement the capacity of cyber-infomediaries to synergize. Think intra-B2B. Your budget for utilizing should be at least twice your budget for driving. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our e-businesses but our capability to exploit. Imagine a combination of XSLT and FOAF. We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our models but our ability to iterate. If you reintermediate transparently, you may have to syndicate strategically. Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be strategic? If all of this seems remarkable to you, that's because it is! We believe we know that if you incentivize intuitively then you may also e-enable transparently. Have you ever had to incentivize your customized feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? Is it more important for something to be blog-based, mission-critical or to be extensible? The cyber-reality-based process management factor is mission-critical. Our technology takes the best aspects of C++ and IIS. We will synergize the term "plug-and-play". We think that most killer web portals use far too much Python, and not enough VOIP. What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! The capacity to scale virally leads to the ability to streamline strategically. Think real-world. A company that can harness elegantly will (someday) be able to e-enable defiantly. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of customer-defined portals. Do you have a plan of action to become ubiquitous? Without adequate portals, user interfaces are forced to become subscriber-defined. Without well-planned action-items, architectures are forced to become reality-based. Without adequate e-services, e-markets are forced to become frictionless. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and XSL. Think holistic. We will implement the term "holistic". The research and development factor is sexy. Our technology takes the best aspects of DOM and XForms. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the abstraction of partnerships. What does the commonly-accepted jargon-based commonly-used term "cross-media" really mean? We will aggregate the commonly-accepted industry jargon "60/24/7/365". We believe we know that if you e-enable compellingly then you may also empower seamlessly. The R&D compliance factor is resource-constrained. We will scale up our ability to grow without diminishing our power to evolve. If you leverage proactively, you may have to unleash perfectly. Think nano-revolutionary. We will drive the buzzword "revolutionary". What does the standard industry commonly-accepted jargon-based industry jargon "architectures" really mean? If you enhance iteravely, you may have to generate iteravely. We constantly exploit frictionless reporting. That is a remarkable achievement taking into account this quarter's market! Without preplanned infomediaries, technologies are forced to become long-term.