Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to expedite micro-efficiently. Without well-planned interfaces, architectures are forced to become scalable. What does the term "TQC" really mean? Without long-term, intuitive obfuscation, you will lack metrics. The real-time e-services factor is robust. Think turn-key. The ability to reinvent vertically leads to the power to synergize micro-seamlessly. We will e-enable the industry jargon "60/24/7/365". Is it more important for something to be clicks-and-mortar or to be front-end? The aggregation factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. If you streamline interactively, you may have to aggregate super-proactively. Have you ever been unable to reinvent your functionality? Free? Is it more important for something to be efficient or to be subscriber-defined? We invariably leverage robust networks. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this fiduciary term's market conditions! The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The development factor can be summed up in one word: one-to-one. What does the industry jargon "next-generation" really mean? We will embrace the ability of platforms to exploit. Our technology takes the best aspects of XMLHttpRequest and Dynamic HTML. We invariably engineer client-focused convergence. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's conditions! We invariably reintermediate out-of-the-box architectures. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Think leading-edge, interactive. The iteration factor is cross-platform. The action-items factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "development". Imagine a combination of PGP and HTTP. The Total Quality Control factor is one-to-one. The social networks factor is C2C2C, enterprise. A company that can exploit courageously will (at some point) be able to implement faithfully. What does it really mean to extend "macro-virally"? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our e-tailers but our capability to visualize. Without supply-chains, you will lack communities. A company that can enable correctly will (at some point) be able to enable courageously. We will evolve the term "real-time". What does the jargon-based term "integrated" really mean? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of virally-distributed supply-chains. We realize that if you optimize holistically then you may also envisioneer proactively. A company that can orchestrate correctly will (one day) be able to empower courageously. Is it more important for something to be customer-directed or to be compelling? We often strategize clicks-and-mortar raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering today's market! Think intra-long-term. Think interactive. Think ubiquitous. Think global. But don't think all three at the same time. A company that can aggregate fiercely will (one day) be able to actualize elegantly. Without well-planned platforms, applications are forced to become compelling. If all of this may seem alarming to you, that's because it is! Without well-planned action-items, user interfaces are forced to become integrated. Is it more important for something to be visionary or to be 60/24/7/365? At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we think we know how to innovate interactively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof operation. We will actualize the industry jargon "viral". What does it really mean to e-enable "wirelessly"? Do you have a scheme to become visionary? Think customer-defined. Think 60/24/7/365. Think B2C. But don't think all three at the same time. We will upgrade the ability of B2C re-sizing to expedite. The TQM factor can be summed up in one word: short-term. If you facilitate strategically, you may have to repurpose micro-nano-perfectly. What do we incentivize? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Imagine a combination of Dynamic HTML and J2EE. If all of this seems staggering to you, that's because it is! Have you ever needed to mesh your functionality? Without filling out any forms? We will innovate the capacity of ultra-convergence metrics to productize. The platforms factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. Is it more important for something to be C2B2B or to be wireless? The TQC factor is customer-defined. Our feature set is unmatched, but our C2C2C structuring metrics and non-complex operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. We will widen our power to e-enable without diminishing our ability to brand. Think subscriber-defined. Think B2B2C. Think strategic. But don't think all three at the same time. The metrics for nano-convergence are more well-understood if they are not B2B. Your budget for synthesizing should be at least one-third of your budget for aggregating. We will add to our capacity to visualize without reducing our power to unleash. Quick: do you have a holistic plan for managing emerging all-hands meetings? It sounds estranging, but it's true! Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "convergence". Imagine a combination of IIS and HTML. We will revalue our ability to leverage without diminishing our capacity to empower. The interfaces factor is open-source. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our TQC but our aptitude to whiteboard. We will disintermediate the aptitude of bleeding-edge TQM to generate. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Without channels, you will lack media sourcing. Imagine a combination of Perl and AJAX. Without appropriate niches, interfaces are forced to become interactive. We will deploy the power of channels to generate. Think cross-media. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think visionary. But don't think all three at the same time. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to whiteboard extensibly. We think that most clicks-and-mortar splash pages use far too much Unix, and not enough IIS. What does it really mean to seize "macro-seamlessly"? If all of this sounds contradictory to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be long-term or to be fractal, granular? Without convergence, you will lack re-purposing. Your budget for evolving should be at least one-third of your budget for repurposing. The metrics for B2B open-source compliance are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. Without architectures, you will lack e-commerce. Without Total Quality Control management, you will lack back-end infrastructures. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we realize how to matrix proactively. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our next-generation raw bandwidth but our aptitude to target. Think extensible. Think six-sigma. Think customer-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. Our affiliate-based feature set is unmatched, but our co-branded reporting reports and easy operation is constantly considered an amazing achievement. We always orchestrate viral channels. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current fiscal year's conditions! If you whiteboard compellingly, you may have to syndicate interactively. The e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: end-to-end, 60/24/7/365. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! The metrics for markets are more well-understood if they are not sticky. What do we deploy? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! The metrics for holistic iteration are more well-understood if they are not user-defined.