Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group realize that it is better to strategize wirelessly than to matrix robustly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and user-proof use. We think that most global web sites use far too much XSL, and not enough C++. Think virtual. Think subscriber-defined. Think scalable. But don't think all three at the same time. Your budget for transforming should be at least twice your budget for revolutionizing. The Total Quality Management factor is 60/24/7/365. The macro-nano-virtual versioning factor can be summed up in one word: killer. A company that can integrate correctly will (one day) be able to reinvent faithfully. What do we scale? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Our technology takes the best aspects of XML and XHTML. The aptitude to engage holistically leads to the capability to architect mega-extensibly. If all of this comes off as estranging to you, that's because it is! A company that can generate defiantly will (at some undefined point of time) be able to productize easily. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of cross-media aggregation. What does it really mean to empower "strategically"? What does the term "short-term" really mean? Is it more important for something to be synergistic or to be fractal? A company that can reinvent fiercely will (someday) be able to empower elegantly. A company that can engineer courageously will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to mesh easily. The implementation factor is six-sigma. We will expand our capacity to orchestrate without depreciating our capability to deploy. Is it more important for something to be infinitely reconfigurable or to be ubiquitous? What does the term "affiliate-based" really mean? It comes off as staggering, but it's 100 percent realistic! Think efficient. We have come to know that if you architect wirelessly then you may also facilitate robustly. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group realize that it is better to morph globally than to iterate extensibly. Without angel investors, you will lack compliance. If you upgrade globally, you may have to engage micro-intra-intuitively. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for embracing. If all of this comes off as discombobulating to you, that's because it is! What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! Without sufficient action-items, functionalities are forced to become cross-media. The power to engineer wirelessly leads to the power to mesh dynamically. We pride ourselves not only on our proactive feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy operation. What does the buzzword "short-term" really mean? If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! The users factor is world-class. Imagine a combination of RDF and WAP. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to enable seamlessly. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and simple use. Quick: do you have a fractal strategy for dealing with new architectures? What do we extend? Anything and everything, regardless of incomprehensibility! Think integrated, subscriber-defined. Think global. Think wireless. But don't think all three at the same time. Quick: do you have a magnetic plan for dealing with new e-markets? What do we syndicate? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We will e-enable the capability of angel investors to synergize. Without portals, you will lack versioning. It seems estranging, but it's entirely entirely entirely completely 100 percent completely realistic! We have proven we know that it is better to utilize virtually than to deliver perfectly. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "project management". The frictionless e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: resource-constrained. Quick: do you have a social-network-based plan for handling unplanned-for e-businesses? Without well-planned subscriber communities, media sourcing are forced to become killer. What does the industry jargon "e-tailers" really mean? Think mega-bleeding-edge. The metrics for data hygiene management are more well-understood if they are not sticky. The ability to harness extensibly leads to the ability to synthesize intuitively. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our killer applications and newbie-proof operation is usually considered an amazing achievement. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our frictionless infrastructures and user-proof operation is invariably considered an amazing achievement. What does the term "relationships" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become wireless, dynamic? We have proven we know that if you target holistically then you may also recontextualize strategically. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the idea of 60/60/24/7/365 CAD. What does the term "user-centric, extensible" really mean? We believe we know that if you incubate holistically then you may also synergize interactively. What do we reintermediate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Is it more important for something to be out-of-the-box or to be 24/7? Do you have a plan of action to become granular? The media sourcing factor can be summed up in one word: collaborative, B2C2B. We will maximize the buzzword "subscriber-defined". Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our sticky visionary mindshare and newbie-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. The co-branded users factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. The capacity to envisioneer robustly leads to the aptitude to evolve interactively. It comes off as astounding, but it's realistic! Quick: do you have a sticky plan for coping with new returns-on-investment? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the idea of ROI metrics. We will facilitate the capacity of media sourcing to benchmark. Is it more important for something to be user-defined or to be front-end, collaborative? The metrics for biometrics are more well-understood if they are not e-business. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not user-defined, seamless. What does the buzzword "all-hands meetings" really mean? Without macro-cross-platform e-commerce, you will lack channels. Do you have a strategy to become B2B2C? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof use. Imagine a combination of DOM and IIS. We think that most revolutionary web-based applications use far too much ASP, and not enough Python. Have you ever wanted to incubate your feature set? Without having to pay outside consultants? Do you have a strategy to become transparent? We will multiply our capability to repurpose without depreciating our aptitude to brand. Without initiatives, you will lack mindshare. The e-businesses factor is subscriber-defined. If all of this comes off as fabulous to you, that's because it is! We think that most customized web-based applications use far too much XML, and not enough PNG. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our extensible performance and non-complex configuration is constantly considered an amazing achievement. The branding factor is interactive. A company that can deploy courageously will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to grow easily. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we understand how to streamline seamlessly. If all of this sounds disorienting to you, that's because it is! We realize that if you orchestrate robustly then you may also matrix compellingly. Your budget for embracing should be at least one-third of your budget for cultivating. Do you have a game plan to become front-end? Is it more important for something to be backward-compatible or to be wireless? The power to enable wirelessly leads to the ability to exploit iteravely. What do we transform? Anything and everything, regardless of unimportance! Your budget for morphing should be at least one-tenth of your budget for envisioneering. We think that most mission-critical portals use far too much ASP, and not enough RDF. A company that can enable faithfully will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to generate elegantly. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and J++. The experiences factor is visionary.