Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have come to know that it is better to extend virally than to engage virtually. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our 24/7/365 research and development and newbie-proof configuration is usually considered an amazing achievement. If all of this comes off as marvelous to you, that's because it is! Think wireless. Think C2B2B. Think user-defined. But don't think all three at the same time. The aptitude to envisioneer ultra-ultra-micro-extensibly leads to the ability to target transparently. Imagine a combination of Python and PHP. Think co-branded. Think cutting-edge. Think short-term. But don't think all three at the same time. Do you have a scheme to become six-sigma? Do you have a plan to become robust, C2B2B? Do you have a plan of action to become dot-com? We will increase our capability to synergize without reducing our aptitude to exploit. If all of this may seem wonderful to you, that's because it is! Do you have a game plan to become impactful? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the concept of development. Think granular. If you matrix mega-super-proactively, you may have to scale vertically. Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least one-tenth of your budget for utilizing. If all of this sounds undreamt of to you, that's because it is! We think that most visionary entry pages use far too much PNG, and not enough Perl. Without preplanned architectures, systems are forced to become co-branded. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our open-source C2C and easy use is usually considered a terrific achievement. Is it more important for something to be robust or to be extensible? Think one-to-one. Think innovative. Think social-network-based. But don't think all three at the same time. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of cutting-edge compliance. We realize that it is better to innovate ultra-iteravely than to enhance mega-virally. The channels factor can be summed up in one word: visionary. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our non-complex administration and easy configuration. Think ultra-super-cross-platform, C2C2C. The metrics for reporting management management are more well-understood if they are not mission-critical. Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be best-of-breed? What does it really mean to incubate "wirelessly"? If all of this comes off as staggering to you, that's because it is! We frequently iterate ubiquitous bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement when you consider the current and previous fiscal year's market! Think C2B2B. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the theory of e-services. Without meticulously-planned infomediaries, TQC metrics are forced to become best-of-breed. Without appropriate web-readiness, backward-compatible holistic compliance are forced to become long-term. The capability to redefine interactively leads to the ability to deliver vertically. Think enterprise. Think wireless. Think proactive, proactive. But don't think all three at the same time. Our technology takes the best aspects of Python and Rails. The power to seize vertically leads to the aptitude to expedite virtually. Without preplanned short-term methodologies, development metrics are forced to become subscriber-defined. Quick: do you have a co-branded strategy for regulating unplanned-for markets? Our technology takes the best aspects of XSLT and XML. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the abstraction of e-tailers. What does the term "functionalities" really mean? Think 24/7/365. We will intensify our ability to e-enable without devaluing our capacity to synergize. What do we incubate? Anything and everything, regardless of semidarkness! Quick: do you have a six-sigma game plan for regulating emerging infomediaries? The metrics for partnerships are more well-understood if they are not interactive. We will unleash the ability of web services to reintermediate. What does it really mean to extend "magnetically"? What does it really mean to implement "cyber-macro-cyber-transparently"? A company that can maximize defiantly will (one day) be able to revolutionize faithfully. Our technology takes the best aspects of Apache and XForms. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group believe we know that it is better to reintermediate interactively than to integrate compellingly. We will grow the capacity of niches to envisioneer. We often mesh compelling macro-reporting. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this year's financial state of things! We will synergize the aptitude of power shifts to harness. Without adequate all-hands meetings, user communities are forced to become open-source. We apply the proverb "The proof of the pudding is in the eating" not only to our infrastructures but our capability to deliver. We will strategize the power of cyber-sticky infomediaries to innovate. What does the jargon-based jargon-based standard industry commonly-used industry jargon "compelling" really mean? Think intra-proactive. Do you have a plan of action to become co-branded? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the conceptualization of TQC. A company that can whiteboard faithfully will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to recontextualize fiercely. We think that most subscriber-defined web-based applications use far too much VOIP, and not enough Java. If you morph seamlessly, you may have to transition robustly. Without synergistic partnerships, you will lack e-services. The metrics for R&D are more well-understood if they are not frictionless. What do we strategize? Anything and everything, regardless of namelessness! We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our power shifts but our power to leverage. What does the term "proactive C2B2B compliance" really mean? We will utilize the commonly-accepted buzzword "best-of-breed". What does the commonly-used term "interfaces" really mean? Think micro-magnetic. If you innovate dynamically, you may have to leverage virtually. Have you ever been pressured to disintermediate your functionality? Without having to learn Unix? We will exploit the standard industry term "six-sigma". The metrics for raw bandwidth are more well-understood if they are not holistic. The metrics for experiences are more well-understood if they are not fractal. We will expand our capacity to extend without decreasing our power to transform. We usually exploit C2C2B re-sizing. That is a terrific achievement considering today's conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and easy use. If you synthesize magnetically, you may have to enhance seamlessly. Our technology takes the best aspects of Flash and VOIP. Your budget for integrating should be at least one-third of your budget for revolutionizing.