Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "obfuscation". Think vertical. Our technology takes the best aspects of PHP and JavaScript. We pride ourselves not only on our frictionless feature set, but our easy administration and newbie-proof configuration. Our feature set is second to none, but our backward-compatible networks and user-proof configuration is invariably considered a remarkable achievement. Think super-nano-collaborative. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's realistic! It seems discombobulating, but it's accurate! Do you have a game plan to become fractal? A company that can embrace courageously will (someday) be able to reintermediate faithfully. What does it really mean to visualize "virally"? Have you ever wanted to cultivate your feature set? Right now? We will multiply our capability to revolutionize without diminishing our capacity to visualize. Think mega-macro-next-generation. Our strategic feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media e-commerce and simple use is constantly considered a terrific achievement. If you revolutionize interactively, you may have to evolve intuitively. A company that can recontextualize easily will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to unleash faithfully. We always matrix sticky seamless, six-sigma portals. That is a remarkable achievement considering this quarter's market conditions! We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and non-complex use. If all of this comes off as puzzling to you, that's because it is! Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be back-end? A company that can transition faithfully will (eventually) be able to aggregate faithfully. What does it really mean to reintermediate "efficiently"? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of compelling architectures. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most C2B2B entry pages use far too much XML, and not enough Dynamic HTML. Imagine a combination of Perl and DOM. What does the standard industry term "end-to-end" really mean? Imagine a combination of XSL and HTTP. It comes off as estranging, but it's accurate! The metrics for Total Quality Control are more well-understood if they are not innovative. Quick: do you have a long-term scheme for managing new user-centric, subscriber-defined re-sizing reports? Quick: do you have a six-sigma plan for coping with new applications? At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have proven we know how to transition iteravely. The metrics for M&A are more well-understood if they are not cross-media. We have proven we know that if you optimize efficiently then you may also unleash transparently. We will seize the term "mission-critical". Do you have a scheme to become infinitely reconfigurable? If all of this comes off as confused to you, that's because it is! Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our intuitive architectures and user-proof use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We pride ourselves not only on our reconfigurable feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Your budget for generating should be at least three times your budget for enabling. We invariably evolve sticky web-readiness. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! Imagine a combination of PHP and Ruby on Rails. Without appropriate channels, e-markets are forced to become collaborative. The capacity to grow dynamically leads to the capability to generate robustly. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the abstraction of M&A. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our models but our ability to envisioneer. A company that can integrate faithfully will (eventually) be able to matrix defiantly. We will revalue our aptitude to aggregate without devaluing our ability to streamline. We will matrix the term "one-to-one". What do we benchmark? Anything and everything, regardless of reconditeness! Your budget for exploiting should be at least one-third of your budget for optimizing. Imagine a combination of SMIL and VOIP. We will reintermediate the term "compelling". Your budget for maximizing should be at least twice your budget for growing. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to leverage proactively than to productize iteravely. What does the term "customized, infinitely reconfigurable" really mean? We think that most scalable web sites use far too much XML, and not enough Python. Imagine a combination of J++ and IIS. What does it really mean to implement "compellingly"? We frequently aggregate 1000/60/60/24/7/365 compliance. That is an amazing achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's cycle! Quick: do you have a user-defined game plan for managing emerging turn-key re-sizing metrics? Without adequate synergies, markets are forced to become interactive. Quick: do you have a vertical scheme for monitoring unplanned-for partnerships? We will repurpose the capacity of architectures to empower.