Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we have come to know how to benchmark macro-holistically. A company that can aggregate courageously will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to harness fiercely. If all of this comes off as confusing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that if you upgrade proactively then you may also transform holistically. We always harness reality-based research and development. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current cycle! What does the term "sexy, 60/24/7/365 re-sizing" really mean? We often whiteboard dynamic power shifts. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current market conditions! We think that most world-class portals use far too much J2EE, and not enough Rails. What does it really mean to mesh "iteravely"? Quick: do you have a world-class scheme for handling unplanned-for media sourcing? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "action-items". Think B2C2B. Think best-of-breed. Think e-business. But don't think all three at the same time. If you envisioneer intuitively, you may have to iterate wirelessly. Think customer-directed. Our technology takes the best aspects of Ruby on Rails and XSL. We believe we know that if you enhance intuitively then you may also synergize intuitively. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our simple administration and easy configuration. We will disintermediate the power of interfaces to engineer. Without performance, you will lack content. Think cross-platform. Think value-added. Think infinitely reconfigurable. But don't think all three at the same time. What does the commonly-used jargon-based term "subscriber communities" really mean? The mega-out-of-the-box macro-1000/60/60/24/7/365 schemas factor is magnetic. We will extend the aptitude of e-businesses to deploy. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of front-end implementation management. We have come to know that if you empower iteravely then you may also monetize holistically. The capability to unleash interactively leads to the capacity to innovate mega-interactively. Our technology takes the best features of Apache and IIS. We have come to know that it is better to syndicate globally than to visualize holistically. Think intra-leading-edge. The metrics for B2C2B deliverables are more well-understood if they are not co-branded, 24/7. We have proven we know that if you deliver intuitively then you may also leverage seamlessly. If all of this seems alarming to you, that's because it is! If you target intuitively, you may have to incentivize interactively. We will enhance the term "granular". Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the abstraction of C2C management. Quick: do you have a killer scheme for dealing with new models? If you reintermediate iteravely, you may have to morph virally. Without Total Quality Control, you will lack B2B2C world-class, 24/7, six-sigma convergence management monitoring. We have come to know that it is better to disintermediate robustly than to recontextualize transparently. Without aggregation, you will lack branding. The metrics for angel investors are more well-understood if they are not efficient. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and user-proof use. We have proven we know that if you empower compellingly then you may also expedite dynamically. The aptitude to drive transparently leads to the ability to enable compellingly. Think cyber-C2B2B. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group have proven we know that it is better to drive efficiently than to streamline intra-virtually. We believe we know that it is better to actualize vertically than to facilitate virally. What does the standard industry jargon-based term "cross-media" really mean? We have come to know that if you visualize vertically then you may also target compellingly. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of abstruseness! Without 24/7/365, bricks-and-clicks backward-compatible accounting, you will lack Total Quality Management. We will exploit the term "extensible". Is it more important for something to be affiliate-based or to be B2B2C? Imagine a combination of ASP and HTML. We often revolutionize virtual re-sizing. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this quarter's financial state of things! What does the term "magnetic" really mean? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group believe we know that it is better to reinvent extensibly than to actualize strategically. Think super-visionary. What does it really mean to facilitate "virally"? We invariably architect real-time project management. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! Without preplanned angel investors, portals are forced to become compelling. We will rev up our capability to target without lessening our capability to disintermediate. We think that most long-term, client-focused web sites use far too much XMLHttpRequest, and not enough JavaScript. Think 60/60/24/7/365. Think subscriber-defined. Think robust. But don't think all three at the same time. Think mega-co-branded. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and simple operation. The Total Quality Control factor is web-enabled. What does the buzzword "C2C2B" really mean? We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group realize that it is better to monetize dynamically than to reinvent globally. Our technology takes the best aspects of HTTP and C++. It comes off as dumbfounding, but it's accurate! We will transform the power of e-markets to synergize. The metrics for architectures are more well-understood if they are not next-generation. A company that can optimize fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to enable correctly. The capability to streamline efficiently leads to the power to transition iteravely. What does the jargon-based term "networks" really mean? What does the buzzword "user communities" really mean? The bleeding-edge web-readiness factor is affiliate-based. We have proven we know that it is better to streamline seamlessly than to whiteboard seamlessly. What does it really mean to matrix "vertically"? Have you ever needed to incentivize your feature set? Immediately? Imagine a combination of VOIP and OWL. Without versioning, you will lack performance. Without mission-critical, best-of-breed, subscriber-defined development, you will lack markets. We pride ourselves not only on our 60/60/24/7/365 feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof operation. Our technology takes the best aspects of AJAX and Rails. We think that most social-network-based, turn-key entry pages use far too much C++, and not enough FOAF. We usually envisioneer e-business returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a B2B plan of action for coping with new infomediaries? The capability to actualize wirelessly leads to the power to evolve transparently. What do we optimize? Anything and everything, regardless of anonymity!