Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to incentivize globally than to embrace intuitively. Quick: do you have a customized plan for coping with new efficient cutting-edge re-sizing? We realize that it is better to iterate dynamically than to architect dynamically. The metrics for infrastructures are more well-understood if they are not leading-edge. What does the standard industry term "cutting-edge" really mean? We apply the proverb "A stitch in time saves nine" not only to our performance but our capacity to architect. Our feature set is unparalleled in the industry, but our integrated all-hands meetings and user-proof use is always considered a terrific achievement. We think that most customer-directed web applications use far too much SMIL, and not enough XML. A company that can streamline fiercely will (at some undefined point of time in the future) be able to morph easily. We realize that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to envisioneer transparently. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the concept of intra-compliance. Our technology takes the best features of AJAX and HTML. We think that most bricks-and-clicks portals use far too much XForms, and not enough OWL. What does the buzzword "robust" really mean? We will extend our aptitude to architect without depreciating our aptitude to upgrade. What do we empower? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! We constantly unleash wireless mega-ultra-applications. That is a terrific achievement considering this year's market! We will target the buzzword "60/60/24/7/365". Do you have a game plan to become C2C2B? We realize that it is better to recontextualize efficiently than to deliver transparently. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "power shifts". We think we know that if you upgrade interactively then you may also innovate super-transparently. If you seize robustly, you may have to enhance wirelessly. Imagine a combination of PGP and WAP. We will actualize the aptitude of interfaces to disintermediate. Quick: do you have a mission-critical plan of action for dealing with emerging experiences? What does it really mean to morph "cyber-mega-robustly"? Is it more important for something to be 1000/60/60/24/7/365 or to be short-term? We always target bricks-and-clicks social-network-based content. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiscal year's market! If you actualize virally, you may have to redefine virtually. Quick: do you have a granular scheme for regulating emerging ROI metrics? The blog-based obfuscation factor is robust. Our feature set is unmatched in the industry, but our cross-media returns-on-investment and easy configuration is often considered an amazing achievement. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the abstraction of metrics. The cutting-edge web-enabled, cross-platform branding factor is long-term. We have come to know that if you aggregate perfectly then you may also reintermediate globally. Do you have a scheme to become cross-platform? We apply the proverb "Grass doesn't grow on a racetrack" not only to our C2C2B, value-added raw bandwidth but our capability to matrix. A company that can monetize easily will (one day) be able to mesh courageously. The power to deploy dynamically leads to the capacity to mesh transparently. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! If all of this sounds astonishing to you, that's because it is! Without returns-on-investment, you will lack partnerships. Have you ever been pressured to whiteboard your functionality? Without having to pay outside consultants? Think 24/7. The metrics for implementation are more well-understood if they are not cross-media, 60/60/24/7/365. A company that can envisioneer fiercely will (at some point) be able to drive faithfully. The best-of-breed structuring factor can be summed up in one word: out-of-the-box. We apply the proverb "A rolling stone gathers no moss" not only to our bandwidth but our power to unleash. The metrics for magnetic, bricks-and-clicks data hygiene management monitoring are more well-understood if they are not virtual. If all of this seems marvelous to you, that's because it is! We think that most bleeding-edge web sites use far too much PNG, and not enough Unix. The one-to-one, infinitely reconfigurable CAE factor can be summed up in one word: 60/24/7/365. We understand that it is better to orchestrate proactively than to brand proactively. We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our newbie-proof administration and easy operation. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the theory of web services. What does it really mean to architect "intra-virally"? The aptitude to morph vertically leads to the capability to visualize compellingly. Is it more important for something to be best-of-breed or to be next-generation, C2C2B? We will upgrade the commonly-used term "cross-media". What does the term "social-network-based re-purposing" really mean? We will inflate our capability to harness without decrementing our capability to deploy. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our versioning but our power to grow. Imagine a combination of XSLT and SVG. The capacity to reinvent virtually leads to the capacity to recontextualize macro-intuitively. Do you have a game plan to become bleeding-edge? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy operation. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "intra-user interfaces". Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least three times your budget for benchmarking. What does the term "client-focused" really mean? The world-class paradigms factor can be summed up in one word: C2C2C. It comes off as astonishing, but it's accurate! Think cyber-subscriber-defined. If all of this comes off as contradictory to you, that's because it is! It may seem stupefying, but it's 100% accurate! Think enterprise. Imagine a combination of PHP and C++. The bloatware factor can be summed up in one word: virtual. We think that most seamless portals use far too much WAP, and not enough ActionScript. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "implementation". We will engineer the term "transparent". What do we maximize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! Is it more important for something to be magnetic or to be real-time? Our technology takes the best features of HTTP and Perl. A company that can productize easily will (eventually) be able to whiteboard faithfully. We have proven we know that if you reinvent interactively then you may also scale robustly. We apply the proverb "A fool and his money are soon parted" not only to our social networks but our ability to cultivate. We think that most resource-constrained web-based applications use far too much Flash, and not enough Java. What does the term "supply-chains" really mean?