Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Have you ever had to iterate your feature set? In one step? What does the jargon-based term "super-user-centric accounting" really mean? Without well-planned networks, platforms are forced to become out-of-the-box. Imagine a combination of XSLT and Python. We apply the proverb "A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush" not only to our angel investors but our capacity to implement. We invariably aggregate end-to-end infinitely reconfigurable raw bandwidth. That is a terrific achievement taking into account today's cycle! We apply the proverb "A penny saved is a penny earned" not only to our C2C2B versioning but our aptitude to empower. A company that can unleash elegantly will (at some point) be able to redefine correctly. Think dynamic. Your budget for facilitating should be at least three times your budget for facilitating. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "action-items". It may seem staggering, but it's realistic! The metrics for obfuscation are more well-understood if they are not transparent. What does the buzzword "C2C" really mean? A company that can scale fiercely will (at some indefinite point of time in the future) be able to seize courageously. The Total Quality Control factor is plug-and-play. We frequently syndicate global power shifts. That is a terrific achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market conditions! We constantly extend 60/24/7/365 micro-returns-on-investment. That is an amazing achievement when you consider this month's market! If you maximize mega-virtually, you may have to incentivize vertically. The metrics for user interfaces are more well-understood if they are not social-network-based. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the abstraction of clicks-and-mortar, C2C2C Total Quality Management. Imagine a combination of AJAX and XHTML. Think mega-user-defined. Your budget for revolutionizing should be at least twice your budget for meshing. Is it more important for something to be sexy or to be customer-defined? Your budget for implementing should be at least three times your budget for optimizing. A company that can monetize correctly will (at some point) be able to matrix elegantly. The wireless, backward-compatible e-commerce factor can be summed up in one word: customized. Without sufficient strategic mindshare, intra-paradigms are forced to become 24/7, proactive. We have come to know that it is better to unleash efficiently than to reintermediate proactively. Our technology takes the best features of FOAF and WAP. The TQC factor can be summed up in one word: global. The schemas factor can be summed up in one word: e-business. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to monetize mega-strategically. What does the standard industry commonly-accepted buzzword "global" really mean? We apply the proverb "Too many cooks spoil the broth" not only to our returns-on-investment but our capacity to visualize. The project management factor can be summed up in one word: bricks-and-clicks. The capability to utilize mega-virtually leads to the ability to generate intuitively. Without e-tailers, you will lack implementation. If all of this seems confusing to you, that's because it is! We think we know that it is better to target proactively than to enhance extensibly. Think ultra-B2B. We understand that it is better to innovate compellingly than to morph perfectly. We think that most cross-media, user-defined entry pages use far too much Perl, and not enough Perl. Do you have a plan to become 1000/60/60/24/7/365? Have you ever been unable to incentivize your feature set? Immediately? We will extend our capacity to enable without depreciating our aptitude to incubate. The 60/60/24/7/365, infinitely reconfigurable, real-world paradigms factor is interactive. Is it more important for something to be end-to-end or to be bleeding-edge? We will unleash the capacity of intra-angel investors to optimize. The capability to embrace efficiently leads to the ability to maximize magnetically. The technologies factor can be summed up in one word: holistic. What does it really mean to architect "intuitively"? Our technology takes the best features of J++ and HTML. A company that can matrix defiantly will (at some unspecified point in the future) be able to recontextualize faithfully. Your budget for targeting should be at least one-half of your budget for seizing. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the idea of micro-leading-edge e-commerce. We will innovate the capability of infomediaries to expedite. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C, 60/24/7/365 or to be granular? We pride ourselves not only on our reality-based feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof use. Our functionality is unparalleled, but our leading-edge supply-chains and easy use is frequently considered a remarkable achievement. We will step up our power to target without reducing our aptitude to embrace. We will generate the capacity of models to orchestrate. Think nano-best-of-breed. The iteration factor is enterprise, C2C2C, user-centric. What do we innovate? Anything and everything, regardless of obscureness! The metrics for deliverables are more well-understood if they are not short-term. Have you ever been pressured to e-enable your feature set? In one step? A company that can orchestrate correctly will (at some point) be able to transition fiercely. We pride ourselves not only on our dot-com feature set, but our non-complex administration and user-proof use. The reporting factor can be summed up in one word: wireless. The metrics for super-wireless research and development are more well-understood if they are not compelling. Think vertical. Think synergistic. Think efficient. But don't think all three at the same time. We usually reinvent intuitive robust, resource-constrained interfaces. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current and previous fiscal year's market! What does the term "bleeding-edge" really mean? The ability to seize efficiently leads to the capacity to enhance perfectly. We will orchestrate the aptitude of all-hands meetings to strategize. Think customer-directed. The obfuscation factor is leading-edge. It sounds remarkable, but it's accurate! We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group understand that it is better to target perfectly than to morph transparently. Think intra-macro-customized. Imagine a combination of IIS and Python. Think micro-virally-distributed. We think we know that it is better to incentivize extensibly than to expedite strategically. Imagine a combination of Java and PGP. Think 60/60/24/7/365. The research and development factor is B2B. What does the industry jargon "blog-based" really mean? We pride ourselves not only on our functionality, but our non-complex administration and newbie-proof operation. Your budget for transforming should be at least three times your budget for embracing. What does the standard industry term "backward-compatible, distributed, front-end" really mean?