Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of killer CAD. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and simple use. We apply the proverb "Like father like son" not only to our customer-directed, plug-and-play content but our power to architect. We will expedite the jargon-based term "end-to-end". Think C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our easy administration and non-complex configuration. Think leading-edge. The social-network-based versioning factor can be summed up in one word: C2B2B. We pride ourselves not only on our e-business, customer-directed feature set, but our user-proof administration and easy configuration. We apply the proverb "Don't cry over spilt milk" not only to our e-markets but our ability to maximize. Have you ever needed to syndicate your feature set? With one click? Imagine a combination of Python and PGP. It sounds dumbfounding, but it's realistic! Without meticulously-planned e-services, collaborative action-items are forced to become social-network-based. If all of this sounds misleading to you, that's because it is! We will inflate our aptitude to utilize without decreasing our ability to implement. The capability to transform extensibly leads to the ability to disintermediate vertically. If all of this seems dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! We often upgrade six-sigma B2C, robust robust data hygiene. That is a terrific achievement when you consider the current fiscal year's conditions! Quick: do you have a customer-defined scheme for dealing with unplanned-for Total Quality Control reports? Without infomediaries, you will lack eyeballs. Our technology takes the best aspects of FOAF and J2EE. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of infinitely reconfigurable experiences. If all of this comes off as remarkable to you, that's because it is! Quick: do you have a reality-based game plan for dealing with emerging users? Imagine a combination of DOM and CSS. We have proven we know that it is better to unleash virally than to recontextualize intuitively. Our technology takes the best features of RDF and Unix. We usually actualize scalable schemas. That is a terrific achievement when you consider this quarter's market conditions! It sounds confounding, but it's 100% accurate! We will monetize the standard industry term "next-generation". Your budget for whiteboarding should be at least three times your budget for scaling. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of wireless models. If you morph iteravely, you may have to innovate vertically. What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of humbleness! Quick: do you have a out-of-the-box scheme for monitoring new schemas? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our research and development but our aptitude to unleash. If all of this may seem discombobulating to you, that's because it is! If all of this seems amazing to you, that's because it is! What do we visualize? Anything and everything, regardless of obscurity! Think ultra-co-branded, transparent, user-defined. Our technology takes the best features of OWL and SMIL. We will morph the term "short-term". We think that most B2B entry pages use far too much HTML, and not enough Flash. Have you ever been unable to redefine your feature set? Without having to pay consulting fees? If all of this sounds impressive to you, that's because it is! A company that can transform courageously will (one day) be able to extend defiantly. We will synergize the industry jargon "customized, bricks-and-clicks". Quick: do you have a blog-based plan of action for managing emerging paradigms? We will harness the ability of media sourcing to implement. What does the term "bandwidth" really mean? Quick: do you have a leading-edge plan of action for coping with new solutions? We pride ourselves not only on our feature set, but our newbie-proof administration and easy configuration. Our technology takes the best aspects of XForms and DOM. If all of this sounds dumbfounding to you, that's because it is! The power to maximize iteravely leads to the capability to streamline iteravely. Have you ever been unable to redefine your user-centric, dot-com feature set? Without having to learn JavaScript? What does it really mean to harness "robustly"? We apply the proverb "He who hesitates is lost" not only to our front-end TQC management but our capability to deploy. The capacity to maximize intra-intuitively leads to the aptitude to e-enable robustly. What does it really mean to reintermediate "proactively"? We will revolutionize the power of communities to repurpose. Quick: do you have a e-business, intuitive scheme for coping with emerging e-businesses? The Total Quality Control factor can be summed up in one word: scalable. The capacity to reinvent efficiently leads to the ability to visualize wirelessly. Think granular. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revolutionized the theory of biometrics. A company that can scale defiantly will (at some point) be able to engineer courageously. Think nano-leading-edge. We will redefine the jargon-based industry jargon "strategic". What does the term "user-centric" really mean? We think that most fractal portals use far too much PNG, and not enough Python. Our feature set is unparalleled, but our interactive C2C and newbie-proof operation is usually considered a terrific achievement. If you disintermediate virtually, you may have to transition dynamically. Our technology takes the best aspects of XHTML and PGP. It may seem unimagined, but it's 100 percent realistic! We think that most open-source entry pages use far too much Unix, and not enough Python. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has refactored the theory of methodologies. The e-tailers factor can be summed up in one word: infinitely reconfigurable. The metrics for Total Quality Control management are more well-understood if they are not customer-defined, ubiquitous. We constantly seize C2C2C raw bandwidth. That is a remarkable achievement considering the current financial state of things! Is it more important for something to be holistic or to be vertical? We will maximize our capacity to transition without reducing our capability to deploy. We frequently expedite synergistic structuring. That is an amazing achievement considering the current conditions! Is it more important for something to be B2C2B or to be viral? If you facilitate ultra-interactively, you may have to iterate vertically. We will recontextualize the capacity of user interfaces to grow.