Corporate Gibberish Generator™

Welcome to the Corporate Gibberish Generator™ by Andrew Davidson. andrewdavidson/at\andrewdavidson/dot\com
Enter your company name and click "Generate" to generate several paragraphs of corporate gibberish suitable for pasting into your prospectus.
(The gibberish is geared more toward Internet and technology companies.)

Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group practically invented the term "initiatives". What do we transition? Anything and everything, regardless of standing! What does the term "open-source" really mean? Without structuring, you will lack distributed reality-based versioning. We frequently orchestrate six-sigma re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement considering the current market conditions! Think nano-granular. Do you have a plan to become virtual? Your budget for envisioneering should be at least one-tenth of your budget for productizing. What does the industry jargon "user-centric" really mean? We will whiteboard the commonly-accepted term "B2C2B, web-enabled, leading-edge". Do you have a plan of action to become client-focused? Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has permanently altered the concept of ROI metrics. We will expand our ability to synergize without reducing our ability to drive. A company that can enhance defiantly will (at some unknown point of time in the future) be able to leverage courageously. Think macro-cyber-virtual. Is it more important for something to be short-term or to be blog-based? Is it more important for something to be social-network-based or to be 60/24/7/365? We will unleash the term "ubiquitous". Think 60/24/7/365. The capability to harness nano-holistically leads to the power to deploy micro-interactively. It may seem terrific, but it's realistic! The users factor is viral. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group believe we know that it is better to leverage transparently than to seize holistically. We will enable the term "1000/60/60/24/7/365". It may seem puzzling, but it's accurate! Our viral feature set is unmatched, but our C2B2B structuring and easy use is invariably considered a terrific achievement. Think macro-revolutionary, intuitive. We think that most proactive web portals use far too much AJAX, and not enough PGP. We often evolve 24/7 re-purposing. That is a terrific achievement taking into account this fiduciary term's conditions! We will augment our aptitude to cultivate without diminishing our aptitude to incentivize. Is it more important for something to be B2B2C or to be affiliate-based? Our technology takes the best features of CSS and XSLT. The user communities factor can be summed up in one word: magnetic. We here at Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group believe we know that it is better to visualize virally than to transform transparently. The metrics for integrated power shifts are more well-understood if they are not user-centric. Quick: do you have a scalable game plan for managing unplanned-for web-enabled Total Quality Control management? We have proven we know that it is better to reintermediate iteravely than to cultivate dynamically. We realize that it is better to harness transparently than to incentivize strategically. Your budget for monetizing should be at least three times your budget for deploying. Your budget for pushing the envelope should be at least one-third of your budget for matrixing. The ability to monetize wirelessly leads to the ability to evolve vertically. We will enlarge our capability to transform without decreasing our capacity to deliver. We believe we know that if you mesh transparently then you may also architect seamlessly. What does the term "turn-key platforms" really mean? Do you have a game plan to become turn-key? We apply the proverb "Beggars can't be choosers" not only to our project management but our power to engineer. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group is the industry leader of plug-and-play client-focused blog-based, sticky structuring. We believe we know that it is better to synergize efficiently than to enhance robustly. It sounds unimagined, but it's 100% realistic! What does it really mean to streamline "dynamically"? We pride ourselves not only on our user-defined feature set, but our user-proof administration and newbie-proof configuration. We have proven we know that it is better to monetize intuitively than to productize compellingly. Do you have a scheme to become client-focused? If you scale dynamically, you may have to integrate extensibly. The holistic cross-media, innovative re-purposing factor can be summed up in one word: B2B2C. If all of this may seem puzzling to you, that's because it is! Your budget for e-enabling should be at least twice your budget for delivering. At Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group, we believe we know how to architect wirelessly. A company that can brand elegantly will (at some unspecified point of time) be able to whiteboard defiantly. We have come to know that it is better to enable compellingly than to iterate mega-intuitively. What does the term "long-term" really mean? What does the jargon-based commonly-accepted commonly-accepted commonly-used term "ROI metrics" really mean? The performance factor is cross-media. We believe we know that if you iterate virtually then you may also deploy intuitively. Think intuitive. Think real-time. Think integrated. But don't think all three at the same time. Without web services, you will lack angel investors. We have come to know that if you reintermediate intuitively then you may also unleash vertically. Think short-term, integrated. The customized re-purposing metrics factor is sticky. Advanced Enterprise Solutions Group has revamped the abstraction of development. If you revolutionize transparently, you may have to extend holistically. What does it really mean to cultivate "strategically"? Think client-focused. Think visionary. Think e-business, frictionless. But don't think all three at the same time. It sounds unimagined, but it's true! Our functionality is unmatched, but our best-of-breed, revolutionary social networks and user-proof configuration is often considered a remarkable achievement. We think that most ubiquitous web-based applications use far too much PNG, and not enough XML. We will morph the aptitude of technologies to disintermediate. The capacity to grow virally leads to the power to incubate globally. We will monetize the capability of metrics to enhance. Think nano-distributed. Without well-chosen applications, accounting metrics are forced to become real-world.